#How was this name not taken yet
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I've been headrotting over a (very historically inacurate) medival ish au where Kepler is a baron/lord and Jacobi is his knight that never leaves his side
Headcanons under the cut >:D
Kepler is notorious to be someone that isn't afraid to get his (of his knight's) hands dirty and quite ruthless at negotiations.
Cutter is the king and works closely with him
Maxwell is his advisor
Jacobi was from a blacksmith family but Kepler noticed how adept he was with the sword and after he saved his life one day, he appointed him as a knight
Warren was adopted by the Kepler family when he was a kid, cause they couldn't have children of their own for an heir
Kepler sometimes looks at Jacobi from his carriage window while he follows on horseback and that's how he slowly notices how handsome he is
He only spirals from there
Obviously Jacobi would hesitate to kill and to die for him. For multiple reasons other than that being his job.
#I'll be drawing more stuff esp with the rest of the characters#you don't understand this au has taken over my brain#i dont know how to name the au yet I'll give it a tag ince i figure it out#wolf 359#w359#wolf359#wolf359 au#warren kepler#daniel jacobi#my art#knights au
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all the actor/celebrity au posts lately combined with troye bringing ross on stage last night for one of your girls has got me thinking...
a musician x musician au where gale is a troye sivan–esque ultra–famous queer pop star, and john's the singer of a well known indie rock band, and he gets asked by gale's team to star in a music video similar to one of your girls...
to everyone who doesn't know him personally, gale feels like this untouchable pop star. he's been in the industry for years, one of those classic 'i used to make music in my bedroom in my small town' stories, working his ass off before finally a song of his blows up and gets traction and then it's such a fast rise to stardom that he doesn't have time to wrap his head around it.
he never gets used to it, but he doesn't get an ego from it; he still hangs out with the same group of friends he's had since high school, and his team does most of his social media posting for him, because it freaks him out having all that attention, as grateful as he is. he's not shy by any means, not like he was when he started out, but he's not the biggest fan of all the fanfare and interviews and being put on a pedestal and all that. he keeps himself pretty distant online, and that coupled with the diva/superstar energy in his music/projects gives him this air of being on another level– a rare type of star all around.
john has a similar story, the whole growing up on the internet thing, making music in his basement in high school with the friends he's now in a pretty popular indie rock band with, working tirelessly to make a name for him and his friends. but that's kinda where their similarities end.
because john is known for being an absolute shit–poster, a little fiend online, a running joke in his fandom that 'john doesn't know that he's famous', 'should someone remind him this isn't a finsta?' type of vibe. he feels so accessible and down to earth, and while he's just as level headed and humble about his celebrity status as gale is, he displays it by being more present and trying to show the human side of it all, vs gale trying to create distance between gale cleven and the gale persona the world knows.
the band is first and foremost john's thing, but as he's grown in popularity, he's of course gotten offers for other avenues here and there, and at the insistence of his manager he decides to agree to try out a modelling shoot one day. he's not naive; he's more than aware of all the comments going on about his looks, stumbles across more tiktok thirst trap edits of him sweaty and shirtless on stage than he can count, isn't all too sfw in some of his band's songs, either.
he finds it all funny, but he also is someone who will always jump on new opportunities/experiences, and he ends up having a good time modelling, and picks up more gigs as time goes on. this is how gale becomes aware of him, somewhat because gale does occasional modelling too, but mostly because he's worked with a lot of big fashion names for tours and videos, so his and john's circles occasionally crossover, though they never actually meet in person.
so then comes this music video shoot, one that gale's been agonizing over for months, planning every little detail and making sure everything is perfect. it's something that drives his manager (marge? <3 gotta include the angel in every au obvs) insane because gale's got so much on his plate as is, but he likes to be so hands on with his projects, and she knows by now there's no talking him out of that. and everything is going great, until the person who's meant to be starring opposite gale has to pull out last minute due to a scheduling conflict or personal emergency or something.
and the usually very collected and put together gale is freaking out. it's the day before the shoot, everyone involved has already travelled to be on location, choreography is set in stone– this is his nightmare scenario, never doing well in situations where he has a lack of control. it's half of what scares him so much about being as famous as he is, is that he doesn't have a lot of autonomy or control over his own image or how he's perceived in the public eye (and digging deeper into backstory, probably stems from wanting to take back control after a childhood filled with being controlled by family.)
but it's situations like these where he's reminded why marge is his manager and he isn't, because she leaps into action the moment they find out about the cancellation, calming gale down so they can put their heads together to find a replacement. they reach out to a few of the names they have connections to, but it's too short notice for all of them, so maybe marge even just resorts to going through the people gale follows on instagram, and stumbles across john's page. he's got a good rep in industry and has worked on less 'conventional' projects before, so marge shuts down gale's fretting over "would he be comfortable with something like this?" by telling him there's only one way to find out, and contacting john's manager.
john agrees before he even hears the full pitch, and he's just as keen afterwards (albeit a bit nervous because by no means is he a professional dancer), knowing it'll be good publicity, and curious to explore a more artsy/out there gig, but also curious about the illusive gale, who he'd been surprised to receive a follow from a few weeks back.
john is flown out that night to the city of the shoot location, barely having a few minutes to change and head to the rehearsal space, where he meets a very frazzled but very thankful gale for the first time.
maybe they both have some preconceived notions about each other, despite having mutual respect and no actual interactions; john probably expects gale to be a bit stand–offish or conceited given his high celebrity status, but finds gale's actually bashful and quiet and easygoing when the cameras are off (when they're on, it's like he flips a switch, slipping into this persona, exuding confidence and sexuality and it honestly blows john's mind to witness in person).
gale probably expects to john to be loud and abrasive based off his well known social media posts, maybe even a little uncomfortable around gale, who is openly queer, whereas john isn't– maybe john hasn't ever stated his sexuality, has never given much thought to it, it doesn't matter much to him. instead he finds john's actually a little shy, much less bravado than he'd anticipated, but very enthusiastic and eager to learn and get the choreo and everything else right, assuring gale repeatedly that he's down to do whatever is needed.
so the two of them rehearse till the early hours of the morning, john taking it as seriously as though it's his own project he's invested months into, and gale gains such admiration for his commitment and willingness to stick his neck out for a borderline stranger (even though he's obviously aware this is a big boost for john's career). john gains a newfound appreciation for gale's work ethic and how much effort goes into every little thing for a huge artist like him.
and inevitably... there is sexual tension during the rehearsals. they're both overtired and sweaty and it's such a strange situation to meet for like five minutes and then jump right into dancing together so intimately, having to shed any inhibitions and self consciousness, but it's a blessing in the sense that they have to get comfortable around each other so quickly. there's no room for modesty or shyness, and john is genuinely speechless at how gale puts business first, and after double checking that john isn't uncomfortable, how he has no qualms about physically directing john, moving him how he wants him.
it's hot to john, the way gale knows exactly what he wants and is so passionate about his vision, and he'd be lying if he said the combination of being starstruck and being lowkey manhandled isn't getting to his head a bit. which is a whole other thing to unpack, because aside from vague acknowledgement of some men being attractive/beautiful, he's never actually found himself flustered by one like this, and it catches him off guard. he stays professional, but he still can't help but let his naturally flirtatious/joking personality slip out as the night drags on; he's like that with everyone he works with or hangs out with, and he thinks it would be weirder if he wasn't like that with gale, like everyone else would somehow notice.
meanwhile gale is fighting his own demons because he's got a very sought–after, very hot, very straight man dropping everything for him and letting him puppeteer him, on top of being so stubborn that even though gale can tell he's exhausted, john's refusing to call it a night until gale does, and THEN as if all that's not enough, john's effortlessly witty and complimentary and flirty. and gale's not one to mix business and pleasure, so he's not even entertaining these emotions, but he can't help but feel flattered by it all, while also reminding himself that john probably doesn't swing that way.
basically they both are discovering they have competence kinks lmao, like objectively they both find the other attractive, but it's not like they aren't constantly surrounded by beautiful humans in their lines of work, so it's more so the emotional side/work ethic that gets them both flustered, coupled with the inherent sexuality of dancing with very little clothing, hands on sweaty skin and toned muscles. but neither of them act on it, too tired by the time they call it a night even if they'd wanted to, and then it's back to their respective hotels to get a few hours of sleep before the shoot.
john isn't called to be on location until mid afternoon, and when he wakes up to his phone ringing and glances at the time, he freaks out, thinking he's slept through the shoot or something because he'd expected to be called early in the morning. he's told that he didn't sleep through it, but he's disoriented until he shows up, when he's told that gale had moved things around, filming as many scenes as he could without him before john was needed for his part, so that john could get more rest. (john swoons. just a little.)
he gets swept up in the capable hands of hair and makeup and wardrobe in his own trailer, and he doesn't see gale until it's time to film, and when he does, he almost doesn't believe it's gale. the glam makeup, the long blonde wig, the form–fitting sheer black dress and heels– gale's pretty as is, but with his features accentuated like that, john doesn't even know what to do with himself, feels like he's going through a midlife crisis at the ripe age of 25. he'd known gale would be in some sort of getup for their choreo, but nothing could've prepared him for this.
it makes it even more endearing that gale seems so awkward about it when he greets john, clearly out of his comfort zone in the ensemble, but john knows there's no way gale doesn't know how stunning he is, it's not a lack of confidence that's making him awkward. john keeps it together, reminds himself to be professional. tells gale it was really sweet that he let him sleep in, that he didn't have to do that, to which gale waves him off like it's no big deal. and he compliments gale too as they walk onto set, tells him, "you look great, wow," tame as he can be, and gale tells him "could say the same for you," and john snorts, gesturing to his simple jeans and boots and lack of shirt, says "feeling a bit underdressed, actually," and it gets a laugh out of gale.
when the cameras are rolling, any of that visible discomfort or awkwardness in gale disappears like someone's snapped their fingers and rid him of it, movements fluid like water, not an ounce of anything other than confidence and power and sensuality seeping through as he commands the camera with his energy. despite his aching body, john's grateful they ran the routine into the ground last night to the point that it's nearly muscle memory, because it's hard to concentrate when gale's looking down at him through long faux–lashes and gloss–plumped lips, caressing his jaw, playing with his hair, the sway of his hips and roll of his waist beneath john's hands so mesmerizing, john's half convinced he's being serenaded by a siren.
the tension would be insane, but equally confusing because neither of them would be able to discern what's an act and what's not, or if it's all just an act, pushing and pulling at an invisible line but never quite stepping over it even once the shoot wraps, both for the sake of professionalism but also for fear of rejection.
maybe after it all, john's on his flight back home and realizes in the whirlwind of everything, he never got gale's number (has a moment of 'why would i need it? this was just a gig' lol okay yearner). john's not even sure at that point what/how he's feeling about gale, the conflicting emotions of feeling attraction to him while in borderline drag doing nothing to help the confusion, especially because he can't excuse the attraction as just that when he was feeling things during rehearsal in casual clothes too.
he knows he could easily ask his manager to reach out to gale's manager for his number, but then he gets in his head convincing himself that if gale had wanted to talk further, surely he would've asked for john's number, since gale has way more reason to be selective with his own with his status.
he doesn't realize that on the other end of things, gale's realizing he also never got john's number, only he's talking himself out of reaching out because he doesn't want to read into john's friendliness as something flirtatious when as far as he knows, john is straight, and this was likely just a job for john, as well as they seemed to get along.
cue miscommunication when one of them actually works up the courage to dm the other on instagram since they're mutuals– either john dms gale something simple, a 'thanks again for the opportunity', and because gale is never on his socials and gale's team doesn't check messages much, it's weeks before anyone clocks john's message, during which john becomes sure he's nothing more than a coworker to gale, which he understands but is sad about. or, gale dms john, but from a private account with an innocuous username that he has just for friends and family, and john never even opens it because the lack of profile picture and generic user blends in with all the other message requests he gets a day.
they only end up reconnecting when the music video actually drops, because obviously it breaks the internet, and john happens to be doing promo interviews and radio shows at the time for his band's new album and tour, so an interviewer of course asks him what the experience was like working on a set like that and working with gale. john gives a glowing review, goes out of his way to praise gale– "the nicest guy you'll ever meet, and the craziest work ethic i've ever witnessed firsthand in hollywood."
when the interviewer asks if john would ever consider working with him again, y'know, the classic question an interviewer has to ask so they can drum up clicks with a 'john egan hints at possible future project with gale cleven!' title, john lays it on thick the way he always does with a wink at the camera and a "he can call me up anytime," but then adds a serious "no, really, i would love to work with him again, he was great."
predictably, the people who are already losing their shit over the music video and making edits and fan theories about the two of them go even crazier, spam–tagging gale and his team in the comments of this interview post, which leads to it eventually making its way to gale, and gale then realizes that john hasn't been uninterested; he must've just not seen his message since surely he would've replied if he had (marge looks at him with so much disappointment when gale mentions his attempt to reach out– "gale, no one with that kind of following is going through dm requests from faceless, private instagram pages, you of all people should know this").
gale hasn't told marge about his possible feelings, but marge isn't dumb; she didn't stand on set for nearly 24 hours with her eagle–eyes and not notice the way gale had been looking at john. to anyone else, it might've just seemed like he was leaning into his persona, but marge has known gale for a long time, and she could tell it wasn't all him playing it up for the cameras.
so marge puts her manager–brain and best friend–brain together and decides that with all the hype surrounding the new song and video, the two of them being seen together in public and making a few posts together would be a great boost for both of them. but she knows gale will never go for it if she voices this to him, because he'd see it as using john for popularity; she reasons that if he doesn't know, it can't be using. so she reaches out to john's manager and figures out when they'll both be back in the same city, and relays her plan as if it's just business, asking for john's manager to let john know that gale will be in town the next week if he wants to set something up, and she gives the manager gale's number for john to contact.
when gale wakes up one morning to a 'hi, this is john! my manager passed on your number to me, hope that's okay. i was told you're in town next week? :)' and then 'egan. btw. lots of johns out there.' and then 'the music video guy.' (john, absolutely panicking on his end, worrying that gale might not even remember his name, not knowing gale's been stalking his socials and confusion–pining just as much as john has been doing the same.)
and then more miscommunication after they arrange to hang out, because john assumes this is just for publicity based on what his manager told him, and he understands, as much as he wishes they're hanging out properly. but gale assumes this is a genuine hangout, because john never says otherwise, until the end of the evening, when gale has to leave for a dinner event and john says "we better take those pics for the 'gram before we say goodbye, or the big guns'll have a fit."
and either gale masks his surprise and then disappointment and goes along with it, thinking maybe he missed a memo or misread things, and this conflict and miscommunication is dragged out even longer, or gale doesn't hide his confusion in time, and john is then equally confused, says "your manager didn't...?" and gale says "sorry, i didn't know; i guess i misread your texts," feeling stupid that he's been thinking the hangout is anything other than a pr stunt. and then there's the awkward "no! no– well, yeah, i was told that this was to promote the video, so i thought– i mean, i would've liked to hang anyway, i just didn't think you wanted to?" from john.
gale is slowly connecting the dots in his head and he's so embarrassed, but also relieved that he hasn't misread things and made a fool of himself. john looks on the verge jumping out of his skin as gale sits quietly, so gale puts him out of his misery, smiles and pushes his irritation about the incident down and says "i do want to, john. i think marge– it doesn't matter. it was a miscommunication, i guess." and all the tension evaporates out of john's body, and he lets out a laugh, and a "oh, thank god. fuck. i was about to walk into the street," and gale lets himself relax too, scoffing at john.
so they decide to have a redo the next week, since they both do feel obligated to take their stupid pictures now to please their teams (and the internet), and thus a tentative friendship is born, the two of them dancing around each other and around feelings because everything is confusing as is, let alone with the way their careers affect every aspect of their lives. so much slowburn, lots of john trying to figure his attraction out and gale keeping his walls up because the thought of literally becoming the person he's singing about in his music video is laughable, he doesn't wanna be strung around or used as an experiment for john.
and john respects this unspoken boundary and also appreciates that they can get to know each other as friends while he tries to stop freaking out every time he pictures him and gale doing less than platonic things. probably a whole lot of chaos on john's end with the absolute tornado that he is, ie: '4am 'am i gay' quizzes taken in the dark of his bunk on a tour bus, asking an openly queer friend from his band if his feelings toward gale are normal, rumours started by a fan that they saw john in a gay club after a show, etc.
because john doesn't do anything halfway– he's ready to literally go out and kiss men and explore his newfound feelings, not just to prove himself to gale, but to figure himself out, because he's terrified of hurting gale since john doesn't have the best track record with relationships. overthinks the shit out of everything and doesn't realize it's not that deep, that liking gale doesn't mean he's suddenly attracted to all men, that all gale wants is for john to be confident in himself and his feelings for him before pursuing anything.
there's a lot of back and forth and messiness and emotions stacked on top of their already crazy hectic schedules and lives, the theorizing and prying from fans and paparazzi, caution from management, but when they eventually have their point of no return moment and cross that line from friends to more, the chemistry is so intense that both of them feel stupid for dragging things out for so long.
when the initial new relationship shyness wears off, the sex is also insane, all the exploration and playfulness (and inevitability of the whole feminization thing coming back into play since that's what starts everything in the first place lol). they're barely able to keep their hands off each other, almost always spending the night at each other's places, stealing as much time as they can to make up for the time apart when there are tours or other events separating them.
they try to keep things private for a while, but with how active john is online, he slips up a good few times– tiktoks where a hat or something of gale's is accidentally left in the background, story posts where john's wearing one of gale's hoodies unthinkingly, mirror selfies where there's a mystery hand or leg in the background. the internet is torn, some convinced it's coincidence, some certain it's all a pr stunt to get people talking, some adamant that they're in a secret relationship. gale's never upset about it; they both just know how much things will change if they go public.
months are spent sneaking around, rarely going on public dates, the odd paparazzi shots still leaking out until it finally gets to the point that there's no point hiding things anymore, it's obvious that they're not just friends. they never actually announce it or make some relationship launch post; they just stop caring, and it's freeing and neither of them expect to be so affected by being able to publicly show affection for each other, but it's such a sweet thing and makes things feel so much more real.
john goes to gale's sold out arena shows and stares up at him in awe and can't believe that gale chooses him every day, and gale goes to john's band's high energy festival sets and watches his golden boy light up with joy every time he glances at him side stage and can't believe john chooses him too.
:-)
lol this post was meant to just be the two lines above the cut but then i got to thinking about origin stories and whoops new au drabble because i'm a master at getting carried away!!
#thx for coming to my ted talk jesus christ sorry#buckbucky#johnslittlespoon aus#johnslittlespoon brainrot#johnslittlespoon writes#4k words FUCK. i started writing this at noon. 9hrs ago. it should've taken an hr and been 1k but i spent the day bouncing btwn 3 wips oops#i will always be a troye–gay at heart clearly. growing up watching him and discovering i was queer at the same time he did? formative lol.#anyway. kinda wanna draw/write this. can't stop picturing how they'd look and how fun the dynamic/slowburn would be#all i did was picture them in the mv idek how this happened (me every time i post a drabble. yet i mean it every time irdk)#i could've written another 4k words ab the sex alone lbr but i need to actually stop jumping btwn docs and Write <3 sry#i tried to proofread and then got bored LOL my bad#i shant even name this au i already know i won't have time to write it rn with both the fics i have going
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ok ok its my fault for being on reddit but r/houseofthedragon rn full of people arguing that demon and his 99% neck lizard have a stronger bond than aegon and sunfyre and it's so fucking frustrating that its entirely condolt's fucking fault that this is even a fucking argument because he thinks the greatest bond between a dragon and his rider to ever go that fucking hard in this universe is pRopaganda and gives dae mon and car ax es more screentime. i'm just so fucking done man. never showed us sunfyre TRULY until it was time for demon jr the anime edgelord to attack him and aegon, never get the fact that sunfyre is literally on aegon's arms, never got the coronation flying, DIDN'T GET ANYTHING UNTIL IT WAS TIME TO FUCK HIM UP FOR THE PLOT.
i wish this mf would get fucking fired before he has a chance to touch these two anymore because I don't think i can handle how he will underplay and butcher the fact that this dragon literally fought tooth and claw with a broken wing to find his way back to his rider.
#tbd#anti ryan condal#hotd critical#anti hotd#Sunfyre#Aegon II Targaryen#and this mf gave so much screentime to FUCKING VERMITHOR BEFORE HE WAS EVEN NEEDED#that should've gone to dreamfyre and sunfyre#i'm like y'know what we need to manifest alan taylor for sunfyre aegon eps bc i can't deal with this#at least i know that man likes these two 😭😭😭#and i'm still like its so obvious who sunfyre is named for but tom and phia can beg for helaegon and will get fuck all#meanwhile other actors can suggest whatever they want and get it#and it's like the only other dragon/rider bond i was so looking forward to was sheepstealer/nettles#that is just completely taken from us#i'm so anxious about how they'll ruin eggfyre tho#because knowing condumb i wouldn't put it past him to be immensely fucking uncharitable to aegon's grief when he finally does lose him#i already saw someone dunking on aegon for the line(TM)#and i'm like man...#i have a lot of thoughts but can we please remember that he's 1) speaking to his council#only decides he needs a dragon after he's told morning hatched for rhaena#2) says new sunfyre in response to borros saying 'how about silverwing' sunfyre is the fucking standard#ALSO SAME FUCKING CLOWN SHITS ON EGGFYRE TO SAY ITS AKSHUALLY DAN Y DRO GON#i know you have read the same books#he is disobedient as fuck despite her being mommy#do not compare. she may get there maybe but she sure as hell ain't there yet#hotd spoilers#fire and blood#just in case whatever
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Nate on the ESPN Unlapped podcast: “He’s got that goal, he’s got that hunger back. He’s back in a team that ultimately he feels that is home for him. You know, we talk about Charles and how close he feels to Ferrari and Lewis with Mercedes. I think for Ricciardo, it’s the same with Red Bull. He feels that’s his home.”
#Nate talking about how he’s spent time with Daniel before vegas and how happy and ‘back to his old self’ Daniel is#just yeah …. it never gets boring to hear that#I know the moots are currently going off at Zak brown but honestly all I can do is laugh#Daniel never once spoke a bad word about him or his team last year and hasn’t even once taken his name since he’s left that team#and yet he feels the need to constantly put himself in the victim’s role because he fucking knows what he did#every time he goes on one of those podcasts and talk about uwu how hard it was for him#I’m like whine some more you fucking bitch#anyway Daniel’s home now 🫶🏽#daniel ricciardo#Nate Saunders
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ninjago seabound hurts. so much. what the fuck
#ninjago seabound#i think this might be the thing to get me drawing again#we shall see#also im very close to crying haha#she turned. into the sea. to save him#and like. the city and all their friends too but he was quite literally dying and the only answer was for her to become one with the sea an#and she#and he sees her after having the water taken out of his lungs. he sees her out the window and she sees him and they put their hands on#either side of the glass. and he doesn't yet know what she did. what it would cost#in the fight later. he sees her explode and takes on kalmaar with blind fury#and then she's back- as a dragon now- and she explodes again and comes back as a bigger dragon and#how can he think anything but good things? he knows what she did now but she's so strong. so invincible. ofc she'll overcome the odds#she'll keep herself together! she will. he has to believe that#and then she wins. and its all over. and everyone's saying they'll just have to get used to her watery body for now#until they find a way to turn her back.#she doesn't understand. she doesn't remember who she used to be. is actively losing the battle to retain her self#and they plead. all of her friends. her master. her Brother.#and him. Jay. her boyfriend.#and there's a moment. a single brief moment where she turns back.#she smiles and holds jay's hands. she caresses his cheek.#and just as quick as she came#she left. jay screaming her name as she dives back into the sea#and then the funeral. because what else do you call it but a funeral.#they call all of her friends and family. they pour seawater in an urn. they hold a service of sorts.#and i'd like to imagine each person feels responsible in some way. for not doing more. for not being as convincing to her.#some feel it more than others. Wu is- was her master. Kai her brother.#and Jay. Jay was her-#out of all of them Jay beat himself up the most. because what good is love if you can't convince them to stay?#woah sorry about that i was possessed by angst#also i feel like you could tie in Jay's abandonment issues with his birth parents here if that wasn't clear <3
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Kemenag DKI released the exam results in a 50 page pdf ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️
#LIKE??? NOT EVEN ON YOUR WEBSITE???? LOL????????#IM STILL HAPPY THO MY SISTER GOT ACCEPTED#BUT STILL HOLY SHIT THE SYSTEM IS SO DOGWATER#dari pagi diralat 3 kali hasilnya HUHUUUU AKU DAH TAKUT TAUUUUU#also hello im back ill be answering asks soon. i think. is that still appropriate. im so very late holy fuck#hi guys how yall doin!!!! ive been busy taking care of my sisters ppdb the whole time lol sorry for the disappearance#i assure you guys im not dead im just very tired#im at my mom's rn so connection might be spotty + bakal disuruh urus rumah&adek juga lol so still not gonna be here 24/7#but im here im queer & i havent done my ktp yet. happt pride month#jasa pos telkomsel#also edit: for context my sisters testing for school right. its beung taken care of by kemenag & not kemendikbud#for some reason the results keeps getting retracted. its been retracted 3 times i thinks before this sonce mornign#in those 3 timws my sisters name doesnt show up. and now she does. hooray.#like ALL OF THE DKI SCHOOLS IN THAT PDF
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I kinda like but dislike that Rumiko and Sunrise (and fans) have never even mentioned that miko (priestesses) are virgins. And that their shinto ability to tend holy places comes from being unmarried virgins. In modern day I guess it is not really required but I kind of wish more people analyzed Kikyo, the dark priestess, Kaede and Kagome in that light.
Personally I think that due to the era Kagome would not be allowed to remain a miko after getting married and having a child. She would still be one of course due to her spiritual ability, but I think she would no longer be allowed to remain in that societal role.
Kagome is so spunky though that I see her rebelling against it. I think Kagome's strength in being outspoken is another great contrast between her and Kikyo. While Kikyo was confined by society and was only freed from expectation when she became an impure monster. Kagome was outspoken and loud to where she didn't have much of a societal role and yet remained 'spiritually pure.'
There is a huge theme of 'societal expectation' in Kagome, Inuyasha, and Kikyo that I think being a miko is a part of.
Personally I'm torn on Kagome loudly choosing to get married and have a child VS remaining a Miko and Kagome choosing to attempt to do both.
More thematic headcannons in the tag below..
#i think due to translation issues miroku is a monk but not a priest#inuyasha#kagome#kikyo#Here I am analyzing way too much into a series that probably didn't think that much about this all#And yet.. I feel like there is meaning between Sota saying Kagome got married and Rumiko never drawing them kissing#i think cannonly kikyo and kagome are not the same person.. but i think kikyo would view that they are.. maybe#the strides against misogyny in shinto japan is very interesting to look at because it is so different from western misogyny#i saw that post going around talking about periods in the feudal era and im like.. bro women were ostracized in a hut outside the village#i didn't comment on the post but i did think about and analyze it#on how the dirtyness of being a woman is the same as the dirty blood of a hanyo or the dirty blood of the burakumin class#personally i think inu's class is similar to half japanese (the original hanyo written in gegege kitaro was confirmed to be based off of it#and rumiko could not have taken the coined term 'hanyo' without being aware of the influence#but i also don't think rumiko was thinking that much about the relation between the two#personally if it were me though i'd theme inu on the spiritual dirtiness of his blood rather than him being a half race#((((((related but i also headcannoned inuyasha as a bastard . a literal one#((and i also headcannon that hte name 'inuyasha' was not his birth name. it was a name given to him by the villiagers he stole from--#-- as a child/teen and he decided to reclaim the insult because he was what means 'dog monster' much more than the name his mom gave him))#i think it's strongly implied even that Inuyasha is a bastard.. i never see anyone analyze that.#to analyze that even if inuyasha was born a human he would still be hated for existing :''''DDD#my posts that i made
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Playing Sonic Battle hurts 190% when you have a relative you love that happens to be a baby
#ouuugggh my heart hurts so much#the way everyone calls emerl ''sonic's baby''#the way emerl treats cream like a child would treat another#the way emerl literally has the soul of a loving child who wanted nothing more but to care for the world#and both of them were too good for it#the way sonic talks like a worried parent when he's about to send emerl to fight eggman#the way emerl loves everyone around him down to the people that didn't treat him the best (shadow and rouge)#the way he always shouted for sonic's name when he was sad#the way sonic battle was the one game sonic was able to feel visible emotional pain towards someone's death and cry#the way emerl was a child too good and was taken from this world#do you think sonic looks at gemerl and thinks#about how despite gemerl being made to be emerl#they couldn't feel more different? how emerl was cocky and childish yet gemerl is polite and (fittingly) robotic?#about how emerl treated fights like playing while gemerl treats them like they are just that? fights?#about how if sonic didn't allow emerl to go fight eggman with him#his baby would still be alive?#GODAMNIT IM CRYING AGAIN#sth#sonic battle#sonic the hedgehog#emerl the gizoid#text post
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I don’t give a fuck about pronouncing European names correctly. I don’t know why bipoc are expected to be so well-versed in European culture or do ‘white people shit’ to be respected and taken seriously when our own cultures are rich, elegant, and beautiful. These people don’t even take two seconds out of their day to pronounce the easiest ethnic names but I have to know how to say every single Russian or French name properly or else I’ll be deemed as ‘unintelligent’? Don’t piss me off.
#personal#my friend and I were having a conversation about this the other day#if you say you like film or literature people expect you to follow Russian or French directors and authors typically#actually if you say you’re interested in anything people expect you to be aware of and fully educated on white creators#bipoc creators are often neglected#a lot of my family and friends who work in corporate environments are forced to assimilate in white culture#in order to be taken seriously as a professional#yet they’re white colleagues don’t have to assimilate into culture to be taken seriously#THEIR*****#just look at how pretentious the fashion community gets when you mispronounce the name of european designers#yet they can’t even pronounce the simplest Asian or African names#forget about pronouncing they don’t even follow Asian or African designers
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some dilla screenshots that i took cuz i love her
#i still dont know how her name is spelt.. is it dilla is it dila is it dilah is it dillah is it dellah … but ik she is so wonderful#best mama ever because shes deuces mom and deuce loves her sm and shes so sweet and silly#twst spoilers#twst#:33 best hometown event because HER !!! in the flesh#(says the guy who hasn’t really taken the time to look at translations yet and just clicked through the game to see her and the gangs faces
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Okay so, bad news is I have to rewrite most of what I’ve got for Act 2.
Good news is I think I’ve finally figured out a big part of what was giving me so much trouble with trying to write Orange.
And it turns out…it was his name.
I had him define himself too early.
#NGD!verse#no good deed#ava enthusiasts#I can’t believe it’s taken me nearly a year of writer’s block to figure out that THIS was where the problem stemmed from#I hadn’t even CONSIDERED that him picking his own name so soon might be why I was having so much trouble figuring him out#man I was so eager to rush into calling him Orange#I really didn’t think about how he hasn’t even had time to get used to his GIVEN name yet
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Just so yall know. Everytime yall respond to my tags im comin out onto tha porch with my shotgun cause yall vermits gotta stop goin thru my garbage.
#I mean come on yall it’s kinda embarrassing cause I normally vent in there lmao#I put the stuff im most insecure about posting in the tags#I used to hide em even further down by putting a lot of normal tags till you couldnt see my rambles#the tags are my shitty diary#I do this with almost every post too lmao#I used to be so scared to even post in there cause I was so insecure about my posts back in the day#I should say back in my prime because I had way better posts back then#has everyone stopped reading this far yet?#is the coast clear?#I used to post under different names in the tags cause I was so worried about how I would be taken#like anxiety to the max so I made up a bunch of fak mod names to post under#like the silly sonic ask blog lmao#see I never left the house (for like three years) and I didn’t know mich about being social#now I just hardly don’t care#still worried im a commit a hate crime by mistake#but thats a southern worry
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also, in my mind, babynobody is taller than liquid, and liquid hates it cuz he's like 3 years older than nobody.
#shegoes by umm. calliander mostly in '84 he hasn't taken on the nobody name yet again because he is like 8.#i newd to actually meet liquid ingame he's so cute little baby with anger issues. dawwww.#i thinkthey'd imprint on eafh other like baby ducks.#liquid voice leander come over here i have to teach you how to throw rocks at pidgeons.#.txt
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what if I renamed Storm as Zephyr instead. what if I renamed myself Zephyr. hmm. hmmmmmm.
#nothing permanent decided just yet of course#but I was just reminded that the word exists and hit damn. it sure does have a certain pull to it#if I do rename Storm then like... 'Storm' would definitely still stick around as a nickname at the very least#but like. I'm honestly considering it for my own name. I've been looking for a better one#my birth name is just ehhhh to me. I don't feel a ton of connection to it really#and Color is fine for online spaces/with people who know this side of me. but it's not really something I tend to introduce myself as irl#I mean to be fair Zephyr might not be taken much more seriously either but it does have a certain feel that I like#eh. if it doesn't really really stick with me then maybe it'll end up as the name for an alternate Storm form or something#like that angel design I made for her yeaaaaars ago#ironically it's about this time of year that I decided to change her name from Color to Storm. that was back around new years 2017...#holy FUCK how is that SEVEN years ago#I. huh. what .. what the fuck. yeah it was winter 2016/17 I'm pretty sure? if not then it was 2015/16 which means eight years and. man. huh.#okay checking old refs it was in fact 2017 when she officially became Storm#wild.#anyway that's tonight's 2:30am thoughts#the snowjag speaks
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meeting a new psychiatrist in like 2 weeks so i made a list of what i need to tell her ahead of time and seeing it all laid out on a doc like this really made me think.. guys i fear i might be mentally unwell 😳
#this isn't even ALL my problems just the pressing ones i need taken care of asap#a list of 7 different things. idk if you can even treat them all at once. christ alive#i got 45 minutes with her how the fuck will i relay all of this information in such a short amount of time!!!!!!#i met my previous psychiatrist 10 years ago (oof.) and the first meeting was like 2 hours long#and that was half the life experience and so less problems too!!!!! bc i was only 13!!!!!!!#hell i didn't have names for most of thse things yet#i will not lie. I'm scared. I've been rejected by multiple mental health workers already and i don't want that list to get longer lol#i just need something to make my pain less bad... for now at least... probably the rest too but idk :/
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🪱 transsexual-beast Follow
Bi lesbians are setting our community back. Their labels are contradictory and don't make sense.
🎇 dykelovedyke Follow
Agreed. Another one of those identities that uses the q slur and makes it seem normal. They just hurt us. No one should use the word.
🎑 kink-isnt-pride Follow
I swear kids need to get offline and do their homework and let the adults handle lgbt discourse. No respect for the generations who fought for them, they would be disappointed to see what a mockery the movement is.
🎭 we-are-oppressed Follow
It's because they never had to suffer through life like how we did. They don't join the fight but they do join the party.
#tw unreality#tw queerphobia#this is what you fuckers sound like LMAO#bi lesbian positivity#kink belongs at pride#queer isn’t a slur#tw d slur#just in case someone doesn't get it:#The first user complains about bi lesbians despite being a transsexual which is ALSO an outdated term that can be taken as ''badly''#(''Bi Lesbians make it sound like lesbians can be attracted to men!'' okay but with that logic transsexuals are harmful because instead of#saying they're transgender they're iMpLyInG it's just switching your sexuality)#Second complains about queer yet they say dyke#third complains about how we distorted the message and yet is anti kink at pride which was part of pride back then#and the fourth literally has the name ''we are oppressed'' then arguing now the community is just a party and thats why they're coming
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