#How can I restore my erection naturally?
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Natural erection methods
Natural erection methods Erectile dysfunction, or the inability to get or maintain an erection, is a problem that affects many men of all ages. Erection problems can be caused by many factors, such as chronic diseases, hormonal disorders, stress, or alcohol and tobacco abuse.
Drugs such as sildenafil (Viagra), tadalafil (Cialis), and vardenafil (Levitra) can be used to treat erectile dysfunction. These drugs are effective, but they can also have some side effects.
In addition to drugs, there are also natural methods that can help you improve your erection. The most popular natural methods include:
Healthy diet A diet rich in fruits, vegetables, whole grains, nuts and seeds can help improve overall health, including sexual performance. It is especially important to consume products rich in arginine, which is an amino acid necessary for the production of nitric oxide, which is responsible for the relaxation of blood vessels. Sources of arginine include: * fish, * walnuts, * pumpkin seeds, * sunflower seeds, * cocoa.
Regular physical activity Physical exercise, such as running, swimming or cycling, helps to improve blood circulation throughout the body, including the penis. Regular exercise can also help reduce stress, which is one of the risk factors for erectile dysfunction.
Kegel muscle exercises Kegel exercises help strengthen the pelvic floor muscles, which are responsible for controlling urination and bowel movements. Strong pelvic floor muscles can also help improve erections. Kegel exercises can be done anywhere and anytime.
Relaxation Stress is one of the most common risk factors for erectile dysfunction. Regular relaxation exercises such as yoga, tai chi, and meditation can help reduce stress and improve sexual performance.
Herbs and dietary supplements Certain herbs and dietary supplements, such as maca, tribulus terrestris, and ginseng, can help improve erections. However, it should be remembered that herbs and dietary supplements are not as effective as drugs, and their use may be associated with certain side effects.
If you have erection problems, you should consult a doctor who will help determine the cause of the problem and prescribe appropriate treatment if necessary.
See ready-made solutions
#Natural erection methods#Natural Ways to Maintain Erections#How can I restore my erection naturally?#How can I get really hard naturally?#Do guys get hard naturally?
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and ive talked so much before about how the end of jingo is so fucking crazy, because vimes is bribed into accepting a promotion by vetinari offering to restore his pride (as well as his coat of arms and erect a statue to him) and remove the shame he feels about being related to old stoneface by LITERALLY rewriting history, but when we even slightly compare that to how sybil has been trying to communicate to vimes that he IS a good person who is deserving of pride and respect, we see that sybil has never been able to get through to vimes even slightly, ESPECIALLY in jingo. vetinari has always been able to do that, though. vetinari can talk vimes down or up or simply point him in a direction and he'll leap. vetinari holds that secret puzzle piece to vimes' brain. and i hear you say "but its because vetinari is manipulating him!" okay. go read the end of men at arms. go read all of feet of clay and jingo and then come back and tell me vetinari 1. always knows what hes doing 2. doesnt have a positive relationship with vimes. you cant. textually, they have a working partnership that benefits them both, because they understand each other on a level that no one else does. they got there via trial by fire (see: entire second half of men at arms) but its there. so why has sybil been unable to get through to vimes in the same way that vetinari has? theres a couple reasons, but the main one is that the nature of their relationship (two men who have mutual respect/affection for each other in a work environment) inherently Works for vimes. and it works perfectly for vetinari too. vimes has no attachment to heterosexual marriage, and he feels no true loyalty to his wife besides the nagging guilt that he Should feel loyal to her. like i said in my other post, vimes hates the idea of heterosexual marriage. its threatening his way of life. its forcing him into a role he hates. so of course, of course he will be loyal to vetinari first and foremost
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PROSOLUTION PILLS: BOOST YOUR CONFIDENCE TODAY! 💪
Feeling a bit unsure about your performance in the bedroom?
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Prosolution Plus Pills Reviews
When it comes to enhancing performance, I've seen a lot of products come and go.
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Let’s break down what these pills are really about.
What Are Prosolution Plus Pills?
These aren't just any supplements.
Prosolution Plus Pills focus on improving sexual health and addressing issues like erectile dysfunction.
They’re made from a blend of natural ingredients designed to boost libido, improve stamina, and enhance overall performance.
I remember chatting with a friend who was struggling in this area. He felt embarrassed and frustrated.
Then he discovered these pills and decided to give them a shot.
The results? A noticeable change in confidence and satisfaction.
Key Ingredients That Make a Difference
What sets Prosolution Pills apart is their ingredient list.
Here’s what you’ll find inside:
Butea Superba: Known for its ability to increase blood flow.
Maca Root: A popular herb used for boosting energy and libido.
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Each of these ingredients plays a role in making sure you feel your best when it matters most.
How Do Prosolution Plus Pills Work?
You might be wondering how exactly these pills work.
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Imagine feeling that surge of confidence again, like my buddy did after he started taking them.
Real User Experiences
Nothing beats hearing from real users about their experiences with Prosolution Plus Pills.
Here are some testimonials that stood out:
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These stories highlight how effective these pills can be in restoring confidence and satisfaction in intimate relationships.
Why Choose Prosolution Plus Over Others?
With so many options available, why should you pick Prosolution Pills?
Here’s the deal:
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Focus on Performance: Specifically designed for sexual health improvement.
It's clear that this product stands out because they genuinely care about helping people regain their confidence without compromising health or safety.
Where Can You Get Prosolution Plus Pills?
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Final Thoughts on Prosolution Plus Pills Reviews
So there you have it—everything you need to know about Prosolution Plus Pills.
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Prosolution Plus Pills
Let’s talk about something that many people are curious about: Prosolution Plus Pills.
You might be wondering where to get them and if it’s worth the investment.
I’ve been there, and I know how important it is to make a smart choice when it comes to products that promise results.
So, let’s break this down.
Where To Buy Prosolution Pills
Finding the right place to buy Prosolution Pills can feel overwhelming.
You want quality, reliability, and a straightforward process.
The good news? You can get these pills directly from the official website.
This ensures you’re getting the real deal without any dodgy third-party sellers involved.
When you buy from the official site, you also gain access to exclusive offers and discounts.
It’s all about getting value for your money.
Pricing Options for Prosolution Plus Pills
Now let's chat about pricing.
The cost of Prosolution Plus Pills varies based on how many bottles you decide to purchase at once.
Here’s a quick breakdown:
One Month Supply: This is perfect if you're just testing things out.
Three Month Supply: A solid option if you're looking for longer-term benefits.
Six Month Supply: The best bang for your buck with significant savings.
Buying in bulk often leads to better deals.
Plus, think about it – investing in yourself is always worth it.
Discounts and Promotions
Keep an eye out for promotions on the official site.
They often run special offers that make purchasing even more appealing.
For example:
Seasonal discounts
Buy one get one free deals
Loyalty programs for returning customers
These promotions can save you quite a bit of cash while ensuring you keep your supply steady.
Customer Testimonials on Prosolution Plus Pills
Hearing from real users helps paint a picture of what to expect with Prosolution Plus Pills.
Take Mark, 35 years old:
"After trying various products with no luck, I decided to give Prosolution a shot based on some reviews I read online.
Within weeks, I noticed a difference! My confidence has skyrocketed."
Or Sarah, 28 years old:
"I was skeptical at first but after using these pills consistently for two months, I feel like my old self again!
It truly made a difference in my life."
These testimonials show that real people are experiencing positive changes thanks to these pills.
Why Choose Prosolution Plus?
You're probably asking yourself: why should I choose Prosolution Plus Pills over other options?
Simple answer: they work effectively and have been backed by numerous positive reviews.
People love that they’re made with natural ingredients designed specifically for enhancing male performance.
No harsh chemicals or side effects – just results!
Plus, the company stands behind their product with a satisfaction guarantee. If you're not happy with your purchase within 67 days, they’ll refund your money without hassle.
That kind of assurance makes buying so much easier!
Simple Purchase Process
Once you've decided on your package size and found any current promotions, purchasing is straightforward:
Head over to the official website.
Select your desired quantity.
Fill in your details – name, address, payment info.
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Final Thoughts on Purchasing Prosolution Plus Pills
In short, buying Prosolution Plus Pills is simple and secure when done through their official site.
With competitive pricing options and regular promotions available,
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Prosolution Pills
Let’s talk about Prosolution Pills.
I know what you’re thinking.
You’ve probably heard the buzz, read some reviews, and maybe even felt a little skeptical.
That’s completely normal.
But here’s the deal: when it comes to enhancing your performance and boosting confidence, you want something that works.
So, what are my thoughts on these pills?
Let me break it down for you.
What Are Prosolution Plus Pills?
Prosolution Plus Pills are designed specifically to help with sexual health.
They aim to improve stamina, increase libido, and enhance overall sexual satisfaction.
What sets them apart?
The blend of natural ingredients tailored for effectiveness.
We’re talking about herbs like Tribulus Terrestris and Asparagus Adscendens, known for their positive effects on male vitality.
These aren’t just random ingredients thrown together; they have a purpose.
Why Consider Prosolution Pills?
Now, let’s get into why you might want to consider these pills over others in the market.
Natural Ingredients: The formulation is based on traditional remedies backed by modern science.
Positive Reviews: Many users rave about their experiences.
Increased Confidence: When your performance improves, so does your self-esteem.
One customer named Jack, 34 from London shared his experience:
"I was hesitant at first but decided to give Prosolution Plus Pills a shot. After a few weeks, I noticed a real difference in my energy levels and confidence."
That kind of feedback speaks volumes.
Looking for Alternatives?
If you're exploring options alongside Prosolution Pills, there are several products out there that also claim to enhance male performance.
But here's where it gets tricky—many don’t deliver on their promises or use questionable ingredients.
So how do you find something that genuinely works?
Exploring Other Options
When searching for alternatives to Prosolution Plus Pills, consider looking at:
Ingredients List: Always check what’s inside.
User Testimonials: Real stories matter.
Reputation of the Brand: Trustworthy brands often stand out in quality.
For instance, while browsing through various reviews online, I stumbled upon another product that caught my eye:
“I tried [another brand] but found it didn’t work as well as expected.”
This kind of feedback helps steer clear of potential disappointments.
The Unique Edge of Prosolution
What makes Prosolution Pills stand out?
It boils down to three main points:
Proven Effectiveness
Natural Composition
Strong Customer Satisfaction
Many competitors just can’t match up when it comes to results or safety.
Another user named Tom, 28 from Manchester said:
"After trying different products with no luck, I finally found success with Prosolution Plus! It changed everything for me."
Those words resonate deeply with anyone who's faced similar struggles.
Wrapping Up Your Search
In the end, if you're considering improving your sexual health and performance,
you owe it to yourself to try Prosolution Pills first before getting lost in a sea of alternatives.
With its solid reputation and positive user experiences,
it stands tall among other options available today.
Remember this—it’s not just about finding any pill; it's about finding one that truly delivers results.
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FAQ
What are Prosolution Pills?
Prosolution Pills are dietary supplements designed to support male sexual health. They aim to enhance libido, improve stamina, and boost overall performance.
How do Prosolution Pills work?
These pills use a blend of natural ingredients that target various aspects of male sexual function. They’re formulated to increase blood flow, improve hormone levels, and enhance overall vitality.
Are there any side effects associated with Prosolution Pills?
Most users report no significant side effects. However, it’s always wise to consult with a healthcare professional before starting any new supplement, especially if you have pre-existing conditions or take other medications.
Where can I buy Prosolution Pills?
You can purchase Prosolution Pills from their official website or select online retailers. Just make sure you’re buying from a reputable source to avoid counterfeit products.
How long does it take to see results from Prosolution Pills?
Results can vary by individual. Some users notice improvements within a few weeks, while others may take longer. Consistency is key when taking these pills for optimal results.
Can I use Prosolution Pills with other supplements or medications?
It’s best to consult your doctor before mixing any supplements. While many people use them safely alongside other products, it's important to ensure there are no potential interactions.
Are Prosolution Pills suitable for everyone?
These pills are generally intended for adult men looking to improve their sexual health. If you're under 18 or have specific health concerns, it's best to speak with a healthcare provider first.
Do I need a prescription for Prosolution Pills?
No prescription is needed for Prosolution Pills as they are sold over-the-counter as dietary supplements. Just keep in mind the importance of quality sourcing when making your purchase.
What if I'm not satisfied with the results of Prosolution Pills?
Many brands offer satisfaction guarantees or return policies. Check the terms on the official website so you know your options if you're not happy with the product.
How should I take Prosolution Pills for the best results?
The recommended dosage is usually two pills daily with water. Following this routine consistently will help you get the most out of them.
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My Personal Experience with Boostaro
#boostaro #boostaroreviews #boostaroreview
Boostaro Reviews: Real Customer Insights
Does Boostaro really work? What exactly is Boostaro? How do you use Boostaro? In this review, I’ll share my personal experience and insights as a real customer of Boostaro, highlighting various reviews and consumer reports.
What Is Boostaro?
As a real customer, I can tell you that Boostaro is a dietary supplement that has helped numerous individuals naturally increase testosterone and improve erections. This supplement aims to enhance overall vitality and sexual health.
How Does Boostaro Work?
Boostaro is designed to increase testosterone and energy levels, restore erections, and boost confidence. It works by enhancing blood circulation and elevating nitric oxide levels in the body, which are crucial for maintaining healthy erections and energy levels.
Does Boostaro Really Work? My Customer Report
Yes, Boostaro really works! Here are the benefits I’ve noticed:
Improved energy Enhanced concentration Increased overall vitality Boosted testosterone levels Better and longer-lasting erections Incorporating Boostaro into my routine has helped me experience optimal energy enhancement and improved sexual health. Many other users have reported similar positive experiences, affirming the effectiveness of Boostaro.
Boostaro Ingredients
Here are some key ingredients that I found beneficial in Boostaro:
L-Citrulline: Enhances blood flow and nitric oxide levels. Vitamin K2: Supports cardiovascular health. L-Lysine: Promotes overall well-being. Magnesium: Boosts energy and muscle function. Pine Bark Extract: Enhances blood circulation. Vitamin C: Supports immune health and antioxidant activity. These ingredients play a pivotal role in enhancing blood circulation and elevating nitric oxide levels. More detailed information about each ingredient is available on the official Boostaro website.
How to Take Boostaro?
Taking Boostaro is simple:
Mix a full scoop into a glass of water in the morning before breakfast. Alternatively, mix a scoop into a glass of juice. This easy routine has yielded positive outcomes and improved how I feel.
Where to Buy Boostaro?
I purchased Boostaro exclusively through the official manufacturer's website. This ensures product authenticity, customer support, and secure transactions. Links to the official site are provided in the description and the initial pinned comment. It's crucial to buy the authentic Boostaro from the official website to ensure the guarantee and receive support.
Boostaro Guarantee
The producer provides a 60-day satisfaction guarantee. If you're not satisfied with the outcomes, simply request a refund. This guarantee gave me peace of mind when trying the product.
How Soon Can You Expect Results?
Individual responses to Boostaro vary. Based on my experience and user feedback, noticeable improvements can be seen after one week of usage. For optimal results, experts suggest using Boostaro for a minimum of three months. You can take advantage of the offer to buy 3 or 6 containers of Boostaro for sustained use.
Boostaro Feedback
You can find testimonials from satisfied customers on the official Boostaro website. These real customer reports reflect positive experiences and results similar to mine.
My Final Thoughts on Boostaro
In conclusion, Boostaro is a highly effective supplement for increasing testosterone, enhancing energy levels, and improving sexual health. Its natural ingredients work synergistically to boost vitality and support overall well-being. My personal experience as a real customer has been overwhelmingly positive, and I highly recommend Boostaro to others. For more information and to purchase Boostaro, visit the official website.
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Important Matters!
00:01 - My Boostaro Review Intro 01:51 - Where I Found the Boostaro Official Website 02:29 - What I Learned About Boostaro 03:41 - My Experience with Boostaro Side Effects 04:01 - Discovering Boostaro Ingredients 04:27 - Does Boostaro Powder Really Work for Me? 05:01 - My Real Results with Boostaro Supplement 05:47 - Benefits I Noticed from Boostaro 06:15 - The Best Way I Found to Take Boostaro 06:41 - Is Boostaro FDA Approved? 06:58 - General Information I Gathered About Boostaro 07:27 - My Conclusion: Boostaro Reviews 08:07 - Boostaro’s 100% Money-Back Guarantee I Used
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Citralis Male Enhancement South Africa (ZA) Advantages: Unveiling the Pros
Citralis stands out for its commitment to quality, efficacy, and safety. With a potent blend of natural ingredients, backed by positive user experiences, Citralis Male Enhancement offers a holistic solution to common sexual health issues. Visit official website of Citralis Male Enhancement to know benefits, working, price for sale & how to order at offer cost in South Africa?
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➢ Product Name — Citralis Male Enhancement South Africa
➢ Category — Male Enhancement Pills
➢ Results — 1 Month
➢ Benefits — Works In ED & Blood Flow Support For Men
➢ Side Effects — No Major Side Effects
➢ Rating — ★★★★★
➢ Where to Buy Online — Click And Visit Official Website In South Africa
Introduction:
In a world where physical prowess and performance often dictate confidence and self-assurance, issues like erectile dysfunction and low libido can significantly impact a man's well-being. Amidst a plethora of solutions flooding the market, Supplement Machine Citralis ZA emerges as a beacon of hope for those seeking natural remedies to enhance their sexual health. In this review, we delve deep into the workings of Citralis, uncovering its ingredients, benefits, and real user experiences.
Understanding the Working Process:
Citralis Male Enhancement operates on a simple yet effective premise: to boost testosterone levels and improve blood circulation to the genital area, thus enhancing sexual performance. By leveraging a blend of potent natural ingredients, Citralis aims to address the root causes of sexual dysfunction, including reduced testosterone production and poor blood flow.
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Benefits of Citralis Male Enhancement:
Enhanced Libido: Citralis's formulation is designed to reignite the spark in your sex life by reviving your libido and sexual desire.
Improved Erection Quality: By promoting healthy blood flow to the penile chambers, Citralis helps achieve stronger and longer-lasting erections.
Increased Stamina: Users report experiencing improved endurance and stamina, allowing for longer and more satisfying sexual encounters.
Boosted Confidence: With restored sexual vitality and performance, users often find a significant boost in their confidence and self-esteem.
Ingredients:
The efficacy of Citralis Male Enhancement South Africa lies in its carefully curated blend of natural ingredients, each chosen for its proven benefits in improving sexual health. Some key ingredients include:
L-Arginine: An amino acid that stimulates the production of nitric oxide, leading to increased blood flow to the penis and improved erections.
Horny Goat Weed Extract: Known for its aphrodisiac properties, this herb enhances libido and sexual performance.
Saw Palmetto Berry: Helps support prostate health and promotes hormonal balance, crucial for maintaining sexual function.
Asian Red Ginger Extracts: Alleviates stress and anxiety, allowing users to perform at their best without inhibition.
Muira Puama Extract: Often referred to as the "Viagra of the Amazon," this herb enhances sexual stamina and energy levels.
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Real User Reviews:
John, 45: "After years of struggling with erectile dysfunction, I finally found relief with Supplement Machine Citralis. Not only have my erections improved, but my confidence in the bedroom has soared."
Michael, 38: "Citralis has been a game-changer for me. I feel more energized, my libido is through the roof, and my partner couldn't be happier with our newfound intimacy."
David, 50: "I was skeptical at first, but Citralis exceeded my expectations. It's like I'm in my 20s again! I highly recommend it to anyone looking to spice up their sex life."
Official Website:
For those interested in experiencing the transformative effects of Citralis Male Enhancement firsthand, the official website offers a secure platform to place orders and access additional information. With exclusive deals and discounts available, there's never been a better time to reclaim your sexual vitality.
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Conclusion:
In a market saturated with male enhancement products, Citralis stands out for its commitment to quality, efficacy, and safety. With a potent blend of natural ingredients, backed by positive user experiences, Citralis Male Enhancement offers a holistic solution to common sexual health issues. Whether you're struggling with erectile dysfunction, low libido, or simply seeking to enhance your performance, Citralis presents a promising avenue towards a more fulfilling sex life.
References:
https://events.humanitix.com/citralis-male-enhancement-south-africa-introduction-reviews-and-price-updated-2024
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Is testoultra Safe to Use?
The company offers a 30-day money-back guarantee that can be accessed when you call their customer support. You will be responsible for the shipping charges of
returning the product. You should be aware not to stay with the product for longer than 30 days as you will not be able to access the refund. You will have funds in
How Often Should I Use testoultra?
You can use two pills of testoultra every day. You can also add a third pill 30 minutes before you engage in sexual activity.
How Fast Will I Get My Product in the Mail?
You should expect your product between two to three weeks from the time you order it.
Does This Product Have a Money-back Guarantee?
The company offers a 30-day money-back guarantee that is in force when you return the product before 30 days have passed after you ordered it. You will not be able to
access the refund if you stay with the product for more than 30 days.
ProsIt is safe to use. It supports the regeneration of tissue cells. It is an all-natural formula. It gives firm and strong erections. It increases libido. It supplies more energy.
ConsIt can only be bought from the official company website.
Customer Testimonials
“I have been enjoying the power of testoultra from the time I got to take them. I had been struggling to maintain erections from the time I got to 36. Now I have got
to access the power of this supplement I can last hours with my lover.” Jay.
“I had a tough time trying to make wife understand I was not sleeping outside. I was going to lose her if I was not careful. I took the only way out and sought help. I
had heard of the negative effects of male enhancement drugs, so I tried to take a route away from this. I sought herbal remedies that have been proven over time. I was
not disappointed when I landed on the testoultra website. I gave me confidence, and after using it, I can say I am not disappointed. My wife is happy again with me,
and I am a satisfied man.” Bob.
“I used to be the macho man until I turned 42 years old. I was not able to keep my game right. I had a real problem keeping an erection. If I got the erection, I ended
up losing my strength somewhere before she even got started. I needed to get me back. So I sought the help of testoultra and experienced a totally new me. I even feel
better than I used to. I am a new man.” Andy. Conclusion
testoultra has been formulated to increase testosterone flow in your body. It restores your sexual strength, boosts your sexual appetite, and gets you to experience
the benefits of restored power. It is time to stop struggling if you have been having a tough time in between the sheets. You can have a great intimate time with your
partner once again. Just take the step and purchase the supplements today.
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Wild Stallion Pro Male Enhancement Capsules Reviews & Ingredients Details [2024]
Wild Stallion Pro Male Enhancement offers a potential solution for those seeking to enhance their sexual performance and confidence, contributing to a more fulfilling and satisfying lifestyle. Visit Wild Stallion Pro Male Enhancement official website, know benefits, side effects, working, offer cost & buy in the USA & Canada.
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➢ Product Name — Wild Stallion Pro Male Enhancement
➢ Category — Male Enhancement Capsules
➢ Results — 1 Month
➢ Benefits — Works In ED & Blood Flow Support For Men
➢ Side Effects — No Major Side Effects
➢ Rating — ★★★★★
➢ Where to Buy Online — Click And Visit Official Website In The USA & Canada
Introduction:
In a world where confidence and vitality play crucial roles in personal relationships, the demand for effective male enhancement solutions has been on the rise. Among the myriad of options available, Wild Stallion Pro has emerged as a promising supplement designed to enhance male performance. In this blog, we'll delve into the intricacies of Wild Stallion Pro Male Enhancement, exploring its working mechanism, key ingredients, benefits, proper usage, consumer reviews, and draw a conclusive summary.
Working Mechanism:
Wild Stallion Pro Male Enhancement operates on a dual-action mechanism to address various aspects of male sexual health. Firstly, it aims to boost testosterone levels, a vital hormone responsible for libido, stamina, and overall sexual performance. Secondly, it enhances blood circulation to the penile region, promoting firmer and longer-lasting erections.
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Ingredients:
Tongkat Ali Extract: Known for its aphrodisiac properties, Tongkat Ali has been used for centuries to improve sexual performance and increase testosterone levels.
Horny Goat Weed Extract: This herb helps combat erectile dysfunction by supporting healthy blood flow to the penile chambers, leading to improved erections.
Saw Palmetto Extract: This ingredient contributes to increased staying power, ensuring a satisfying experience for both partners.
Nettle Extract: Nettle extract plays a role in boosting the production of free testosterone, supporting overall sexual health.
Wild Yam Extract: Wild Yam is included for its potential benefits in reducing stress and anxiety, factors that can negatively impact sexual performance.
Benefits:
Improved Libido: The blend of natural ingredients in Wild Stallion Pro helps revitalize libido, reigniting the spark in the bedroom.
Enhanced Stamina: Users report increased stamina and endurance, allowing for longer-lasting and more satisfying intimate sessions.
Increased Confidence: With the restoration of sexual vigor, users often experience a boost in confidence, positively impacting various aspects of their lives.
Better Erections: The supplement's focus on promoting healthy blood flow contributes to firmer and more sustainable erections.
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How to Use:
For optimal results, it is recommended to take Wild Stallion Pro Male Enhancement as directed by the manufacturer. Typically, the suggested dosage is one or two capsules daily with a glass of water. Consistency is key, and users are advised not to exceed the recommended dosage.
Consumer Reviews:
Mark, 42: "Wild Stallion Pro has been a game-changer for me. I've noticed a significant improvement in my energy levels and performance. It's given me the confidence I was lacking."
Chris, 35: "I was skeptical at first, but after using Wild Stallion Pro for a few weeks, I can say it really works. My stamina has increased, and the results are noticeable."
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Untitled (“Poor think its youth grows erected look,”)
A curtal sonnet sequence
First Part
From his Finger face from coste to keepe vs wake, and you blind yours and No, into roses gave up her let it bettering; the man into necessity. Poor think it’s youth grows erected look, He did lovely know the silver drips shall I blessed the brakes, and no blush, and the whole in the score, were fall sounds they neither that he may run. With a third is little sport himself, who grew less delicious seem love that elder lovers.
Second Part
Have him with them free, and laws to me, whose session! March; a great examples daily shillingly, my child. On thy memory stars. My selfe the head, when she discount, small his beauty forever—and disarray less be, looking foremost interpos’d of gentlemen; also the same still either we brave him, as I sat, over unaware, behold thee her lap doth his feather’d hand, or hid delights their thou come away dyd wype.
Third Part
Ye this, fainting sun of her dearest of dread of thee—I am so confest that is she fleet, and that time the churches of light, of hand, am I notices, Darlings singing coiled atop the crown’d with eyes sustain immediately deign’d to purge from a silken sails that the last and tingle, sunning town, ’ so Cowper say, how that cheek, in fashionable hurt did ring together! May be done, I’ll sing, for his could be away!
Fourth Part
From them say more rustling to recedence of life ends possest, but she said: Poor lady, how thou canst read, heart-treachery! On Cupid’s bow, and gaze where, that taste—indeed’s the rest may win perhaps a youth untimely warning can as human nature’s crown, and thee taper silvery waves real epic poesy! Do though dull were none but fight, Woo’d and swordsman, when she four Miss Rawbolds in blood announce, was there mine own depths of graces.
Fifth Part
Besides his heart breaking badly spent. As to spy or seven! Say, is that made of mysteries; nor shalt thou kenn’st from the true I haue spell. The bright and a shades, and for that I was small is then the worst which pen express groveling down her with oath and meant thee will breath most forlorn’ of hopes’ too much, is this young Bacchus! For which their brutal scorn of heaven of late, by natural hue of her Eye. When comeliness; ’ an art of man.
Sixth Part
Sister, we heart believing at whose who art dear, let us pay, Must we by a shade pass’d by the world wide, and fair maids shut out for me, thou kenn’st from the pieties of all. Now posting through these cross bronze and plundered and play: dissolve, and a’! She moan all Remember. And the most lately managed to be done such the fields, or taffeta, which though the spade. And multitudes she wild as above, and listen; and in wondrous sea?
Seventh Part
That odd impulse all the restored; as time. That college has every motion; she wash’d black ink my love with little token, say, will beleeue me. In proportioned tide the distress? Virtues know, a hell is the next she plants and eat my doors for us, bridge, pheasantly gentlemen got up betimes would not Cervantes smile so sweet did for ever a potatoes she is wings were gene: ’ the world with dew at ooze of am the rest.
Eighth Part
That venerable gazing once to Semele such be woo’d and Master of crime: o, let it be safe in her grave, myself comprised the small leaned again. And what he can soldiers, whose some kind lady, said did move to be envious moods of bitter love those two, now besides in the Nile’s sun, and the pediments, and better take it; and say his fierce loue and some time what it may thy flowers, eyes could at the argument all!
Ninth Part
From constella, loadstar of piano? It hangs still, white Chastisement, new; you when birds and Washington at Waterloo was best works of birds single laugh’d nor can paradise; and a dozen, alas! Below me, than thus? And thus is a life. Let not as breathed their love themselues will beautie is; blest Charis, guess, and Debt, and blind my best fire. Your faces in force could have plundered from the harvest. And monitor me afeard.
Tenth Part
Fair Melodies and its sought of all there it came at what is parent, pale, yet bubbling wynde, so animated nature’s rais’d, right. Spread around by the ditch, haunted scarce, yet I see numberless fate hear you are deadly blasted store for to recommence not thilke same welcome inmate there she had set together! She sat in front of sunset halos o’er the five-bar gates, disdainful the key. For on my pillow’d in the waves roar.
Eleventh Part
And by light, in that serene father souls confide, to catch tick is stable, sparks, my Love’s breast, like eyes could crack where ages and catch tick is stretching weares by being farmers, while thou not wit nor such as more wretch as an even to untie every part. While Cupids might throne, but in his globe then and the tomb shall his manners may deeme, and I defaced unto the pas—the great and clear, no less massy of idle cigarette.
Twelfth Part
At whose most articles are blessed with horrid war-whoop and shudder, long star, that spite; and, gentle squeeze, warm and wett your hand, and called my imagine, past all things deem’d too supplied, but crowns of our wind, and gory cheeks, or blunder what scorners of musk and rue, and mark; that dissipated nature’s warm caves in au’ and tween himself alone. Soon as it an earth divine: or foul hypocrisy for aye his wrath been remove the ton.
Thirteenth Part
—Like tempest inquiry, tell you have I behold her Son in my een wanton toyes, my wits stranger, or corners of the water, so by thing beneath wholly to this seen beyond then let go. Caesar him from my eyes seen to turn Romeo boot, at their swift foot were. Two roads they did not cruell might for gore and me. What if he doth sweets, why men brede; made in so short hours my lot, far-off from the coil of the temple prosper well.
#poetry#automatically generated text#Patrick Mooney#Markov chains#Markov chain length: 6#214 texts#curtal sonnet sequence
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An Avenger's Revenge (dark!Peter Parker)
PROLOGUE // SERIES MASTERLIST // MAIN MASTERLIST
Summary: Spider-Man was just one of the mighty, powerful Gods that rule the Earth. A night of death, betrayal, war and defeat turns him into a myth, a memory to be forgotten about by the other Greedy Gods that share this planet. Without his generosity, the world takes a turn for the worse and the people are desperate for a solution. With a rebellion on the horizon, it may be your only chance to rise up against the Greedy Gods and restore Spider-Man's legacy.
Themes: dystopian, futuristic, smut, angst, death!, dark concepts**, a tad bit fluff :) **T/W: will be specified per chapter - none in this one
a/n: ahhhhh here she is! my precious! hope you like :)
☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆
There was two reasons why the deities came to Earth centuries ago. It would be hard to believe that there would be a reason at all, but alas, at the naivety of the human race, there were two. The first reason, and the most important one of them all, was the sheer abundance of untouched infinity stones buried deep beneath the surface; a currency that the deities yearn for. Rare and precious, infinity stones are a source of power to those who are strong enough to yield it and in a place where such strength doesn’t exist, not many deities considered Earth to be rich with natural, authentic infinity stones. It was mistakenly overlooked for years. However, on the night of a full moon centuries ago, a God stumbled upon the small planet and with such a find, word broke loose. All of a sudden, they all came swarming until Earth was held hostage, under the deities’ command with humans forced to feed their greed…which explains reason number two. The second pertains to the humans’ ignorance of the true value and use of the infinity stones because after all, what human could stand a chance in a race amongst the gods? Submissive and overpowered, the humans have been subjected to the deities' biddings, getting weaker and weaker while they grow stronger and richer. Reduced to nothing but servants, soldiers, miners and maids, it was a giant step backwards in societal evolution.
Centuries on, people living now can’t imagine a world without the deities’ rule. They call themselves the Avengers now. A poor choice in name you always thought but the reasoning derives from their promise to protect the Earth if anything, or anyone, were to attack Earth to steal their precious infinity stones. A false pretence to hide their greediness, the very greediness that demanded statues of them to be erected, eight columned temples built in their honour and at least one day every year to celebrate the anniversary of their arrival. It’s all very grand and ceremonious, but their opulence doesn’t stop there, oh no. Of course, a God is only deserving of a palace to live in, built by the subjects that serve them. They emanate such holiness that many claim that to look at the very spectacle can be overwhelming, that the impenetrable black iron gates stand to symbolise their power and it’s for that reason alone that deities remain absolute in their reign.
You work for one directly. The first God to step foot on Earth and the leader to all deities who arrived thereafter, Iron Man. Staff know him better as Tony Stark.
With the early morning sun casting an orange glow on the iron palace, you exit your bed chamber, climb the same 3 flights of stairs you see every morning and wander through the white and golden halls with your heels clicking against the marble flooring, dressed in your maids uniform. Reaching the main floor, you meet Ginny, another maid.
“How is he this morning?” You ask, walking alongside her as you both start the long journey to the dining hall.
“He’s quickly deteriorating. His doctor said it could be any day now. I wonder how it happens.”
“How ‘what’ happens?”
“The death of an Avenger. No one has ever seen how an Avenger dies. They’ve been here for centuries and none of them have ever popped their clogs.”
You snicker loudly, your smile quickly fading as you near the footmen standing by the door. Once out of sight, you whisper back to her. “‘Popped their clogs’, you make it sound like they die like any other human does.”
“Well I don’t know, maybe they do. I can’t imagine death is any more dignified for deities than it is for human’s.”
“Whatever, I don’t really care how it happens, we know now that it’s inevitable at this point. What I’m more concerned about is what happens after he dies, you know? We have seven other Avengers in this world, all just as greedy as each other and you know Tony was top dog, his death is going to mean a breach of peace.”
This has been a concern of yours since you first heard of Tony’s ailment. Questions fill your mind one by one and the more time ticks on towards Tony’s death, the more they are beginning to scare you. Your entire life’s purpose has evolved around your servitude to Tony Stark, Iron Man, the first deity to claim this planet, so without him, what good is a maid without her master?
Ginny shares her empathy as she too faces the same predicament and responds with a sigh. Grown together, you would hate to be separated and given a hand that isn’t as lucky as your first. You’ve played a major role in each other's past but with your future yet to be decided, you fear she may become somebody that you used to know.
Just as you are about to enter the dining hall to take to your stations, she grabs your hand and pulls you quietly into the corner.
“Look, you didn’t hear this from me okay? I overheard Matron mention something about Tony giving a public announcement later today. I think he’s going to pass us and the entire faction onto another Avenger.”
“What?!”
“Shhh! I don’t know for certain, but I think he suspects what we do as well. He knows that he has the biggest faction - he wouldn’t leave it leaderless and he knows the rest will all fight for it, so if he gives it all away, there’s nothing to fight for.”
“Who do you think it would be?”
“I’m not sure. We border Captain America’s faction but after the rival they had decades ago, I doubt he’ll be so willing to give it to him, and I just hope it’s not Doctor Strange. My cousin, Megara, works in his faction and I heard he’s incredibly overbearing and strict. Or…it could be someone completely new.”
“Well, whoever it is, I just hope they can treat us at least half as good as Tony has.”
Ginny sighs and purses her lips while a touch of sadness glosses over her eyes, evidently not finding faith in your optimism. “I know. I’m going to miss the old bastard.”
“Yeah, me too. Come on. We better go.”
Being the latest generation of a long line of maids, you’re lucky to have been given the opportunity to work directly for the leader of the Avengers, and he is - surprisingly - the most lenient of them all. You guess there was something about the guilt of enslaving a native species centuries ago that plagued him and over the decades he outgrew his reputation of being cynical, power-hungry and arrogant, and became the reverent leader that the other deities had no other option but to respect. Within any field of executive power, there is ranking and despite how omnipotent and divine these deities seem to be in their own right, they too abide by a hierarchy. Otherwise it would all-out war between the Greedy Gods. There are exactly eight of them residing on Earth each living within their own faction of the world which have been offered to them by Tony on one condition - ‘take what you are given and no fighting’ were his exact words, the very same inscripted onto the Avengers’ oath displayed on every Avenger temple. It’s the only rule the deity’s live by.
Despite being your master, Tony is the closest thing to a father figure in the sense that he provides and protects. Your biological father was sent away to the mines as part of the mandatory three-year conscription, but even after his conscription was completed, he chose to stay knowing that you and your mother were being cared for and he was happy with employment.
Conscription varies from faction to faction, for example, Tony has the largest faction with the largest population, so what Tony’s men dig in a year, Black Widow’s smaller faction may have to dig for 2 years to match. Another difference is the attitude. Here, it’s common for men to enrol voluntarily after conscription because Tony’s conditions are the most favourable in the world. He offers breaks and benefits, extra perks like insured healthcare and a pension, whereas Doctor Strange’s conditions, for example, are foul, laborious and completely inhumane but necessary if he wants to remain a competitor in the deity race. In simpler words, if you’re going to work for someone, you want it to be Tony. Not that you have a choice in the matter…
Just as you take your stations, Tony is wheeled into the dining room. It breaks your heart to see him so frail, an almost comatose body rolling up towards the table where a small bowlful of fruit, muesli and bread sit waiting for him. He doesn’t even get dressed out of his robe that hangs daintily from his shoulders, his glowing blue metallic heart on display; the thing that has been keeping him alive all this time. Its shine isn’t as bright as you remember it and its colour has been losing its vibrancy over the last few weeks, dulling to the same grey that stains his skin. His salt and pepper hair has faded into a soft white in patches but for a deity at this stage in life, vanity is the last thing he cares for.
“Morning, sir,” you and Ginny both greet. Tony passes you both a weak smile, not quite reaching his eyes. You both begin dishing out his breakfast, pouring his drink and brewing his coffee.
“Do me a favour girls, will you?” His voice is broken up by a hacking, wheezing cough. “Sit with me?”
You and Ginny mirror the same hesitance, knowing that doing so would be entirely inappropriate for people of your calibre. It isn’t lost in Tony’s eyes and makes one final plea. “Please. It may be my last breakfast, I would hate to spend it alone.”
Conceding, you sit by his right and Ginny follows seconds later on his left, the food remaining untouched. Formalities quickly simmer and sitting here with Tony and Ginny as the golden sunlight beams in through the 15 foot windows, you seem to be at ease but underneath it all, a melancholy aura floods the room.
“I…” Tony starts, sitting upright. “I…wanted to say thank you to you both. I know that hasn’t been said often - I’m aware of that - but today, I really mean it. Your families have served me well and I intend to serve you well after my…strangely imminent passing.”
Yet another silent conversation is shared between you and Ginny. This time it’s a look of ‘what is he going to say?’
Tony opens his mouth again but the words don’t leave his lips, stopped by a reluctance that consumes him. Your heart stops dead in your chest.
“My…passing leaves my staff, my faction and my inheritance vulnerable, and I have no doubt that the other psychos in this world will want to snatch it for themselves. Call it my better nature but I can’t…I won’t leave you in the hands of Rogers or Strange or even Thor, despite them being the obvious choice for a successor. So…” he waves his hand dismissively, “I’ve decided that you’re now Parker’s.”
“Spider-Man?” you confirm.
“Yes. Spider-Man. Peter Parker. He’s the only one I can trust to not treat my inheritance as an invitation for world domination.” He laughs half-heartedly and it descends into a fit of coughs and you’re by his side in seconds. The flickering of the blue metal heart catches your peripheral and you sense that something’s failing.
“Sir, we should-”
“I’m fine, I’m fine. Now, I’ve been assured that the transaction will be quick and peaceful, and that the conditions will be strictly adhered to and by Gods there will be a serious haunting if anything doesn’t go according to plan.” Tony’s chuckle brings about a smile to your lips. He really is serious about taking care of what he leaves behind. Part of you believed he was all talk.
“Sir? What have we to do once…once you pass?”
Tony reaches over and places a shaky hand over yours as if to reassure you. “Nothing. You are to remain where you are. My passing won’t change anything for you or this faction; it’s a condition I made clear to Parker if he truly wants to claim his endowments. Everything will remain the same except it’ll just be Parker walking around these halls instead.”
“What’s he like?” Ginny asks. It’s a question that circles your mind too.
“Young, fair, perhaps a tad naive for my liking, but…capable. That kid’s got some serious potential. He’ll be the first Avenger to own two factions, one of which is the biggest so girls, by all means, don’t let that get to his head and believe me, I know it will, so you have my expressed permission to humble him every now and then, got it?”
Everyone knows that his late arrival to the planet meant that Peter Parker owned the smallest faction. One that borders the most eastern side of Tony’s and across the water. His income of infinity stones is not nearly as substantial as the other deities before him and it often puts him in the firing line for endless teasing. You once heard of a rumour that the other deities nickname him ‘slim pickings’, taking only what was left of the unclaimed and the unwanted. Of course, Tony - being the reformed man that he is - chooses to take pity on him, taking him under his wing and showing him the ropes of what it means to be a God amongst commoners. And now he’s about to become your God.
“Sure.”
Content, Tony looks over solemnly to the map of the world displayed on the wall at the far end of the room. The framed, hand-painted map is a 2D landscape of the world showing the division of the eight factions, colour coded and labelled with the name of the Avenger that owns it. “I just wish the others were capable of being humbled too. I worry about how they’ll react when they hear Parker’s getting everything--”
“You haven’t told them?”
“Pfft, no of course not. Do you think I want Capsicle and Point Break squawking in my ear about what they’re not getting in my final days? Hell no! I can’t think of a worse way to go. I’ll leave that burden with Parker, it can be his first lesson.”
“And…what if they don’t accept it?” Your words speak the thought as it materialises in your head, and when Tony turns to you with a dejected sigh, you know the same thought has passed through his mind too. The truth is, Tony has been acutely aware of that possibility for a while, that in order for the desired outcome, it relies heavily on his legacy of being the ‘leader’ and whether or not the other Avengers will uphold that respect they have for him, even in death. It’s been years after all. Who’s to say that the Avengers haven’t been getting bored? Tony’s perception of his legacy may not be as revered as he hopes it to be.
“It’s fine,” Tony shrugs but it’s rather unconvincing. “Everything will go according to plan.”
>>>> Chapter 1
#dark!peter parker#dark!peter x reader#tom holland#peter parker#smut#peter parker smut#the avengers#dark!avengers#dark!tom holland#dystopian#peter parker fic#spiderman#iron man#thor#doctor strange#the hulk#captain america#hawkeye#black widow#infinity war#endgame#tom holland x reader#peter parker angst
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author: so i’m imagining that this is them in college. start of a blossoming relationship for both the lan bros? xichen pov here
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Lan Xichen has never made a mistake in his life.
Lan Wangji knows this and loves this about him.
Except…
His brother – his wonderful, perfect, kind older brother – has fucked up this time.
Has seriously fucked up.
Wangji watches his Wei Ying draped over this “da-ge” that Xichen has brought over and it’s almost surprising, even to him, how much murderous rage he’s feeling in that moment.
“Emperor’s Smile is the best, isn’t it, da-ge?” Wei Ying asks, color high on his cheek as he leans over Nie Mingjue’s meaty thigh to refills his glass, “Fragrant and mellow and warm as it goes down – the best!”
Wangji’s fists are clenched so tightly they’re shaking. His teeth might crack from how tight his jaw is clenched.
Nie Mingjue chuckles as he downs the glass in one go. His cheeks are colored as well and his eyes are only half open. “You talk all flowery like Huisang,” he says shaking his head, “Alcohol is alcohol. Who cares what it tastes like?”
“You’re a heathen, da-ge,” Wei Ying gasps, and Wangji has a moment of yes, yes, yes! He is a heathen! And Wei Ying shouldn’t be draped all over him and drinking with him and talking to him and smiling at him!! Wei Ying should be draped all over Wangji! Talking with Wangji Smiling at Wangji!
“But you’re right,” Wei Ying continues, to Wangji’s horror, “Alcohol is alcohol and it’s the best when I have someone to drink with!” With that he lifts his own glass in a cheers and empties it in one long gulp, Nie Mingjue cheering him on with good-natured pats to Wei Ying’s shoulder.
Take your hand off of him, Wangji thinks to himself, eyes narrowing on Nie Mingjue’s huge hand on Wei Ying perfect shoulder.
Wangji turns to glare at his brother – the cause of all his pain at the moment.
Xichen… for some reason… looks as pained as Wangji.
Xichen turns to meet Wangji’s eyes, a pained smile on his lips.
Why did you ruin my life by bringing this monster over? Wangji asks silently.
Da-ge is perfect and wonderful and of course I brought him over, Xichen communicates back silently. Why did you bring Wei Wuxian over? And why is there even alcohol in our house!?
Wei Ying likes alcohol, Wangji glares back petulantly, everything Wei Ying likes is in this house.
Is that why we have 100 bottles of fried chili paste in our cabinet? Xichen asks.
And Wangji just rolls his eyes because, duh?
“You should come over every Friday night, da-ge,” Wei Ying says, and Wangji is contemplating the pros and cons of throwing himself off the balcony. “Lan Zhan only lets me drink at his place on Fridays but it’s no fun drinking by myself.”
Wangji curses his low alcohol tolerance. Curses his blood. Curses his ancestors.
“You’re funny, Wei Wuxian,” Nie Mingjue laughs – and duh, of course Wei Ying is funny? Wei Ying is funny and smart and beautiful and Nie Mingjue should take his dirty hand off Wei Ying’s shoulder right now. “Why’re you inviting me over like it’s your place? This is Xichen’s place! Xichen and his brother’s place!”
Wei Ying pouts at that, and finally – finally – looks at Wangji. “Lan Zhan, can da-ge come drink here on Fridays?” he asks.
No, Wangji thinks viciously. If Nie Mingjue and Wei Ying are ever in the same room again, Wangji is going to have an aneurism.
“Yes,” he says, forcibly relaxing his fists and his jaw. “Wei Ying can invite anyone he wants.”
Wei Ying smiles then and crawls over to Wangji – which is not good. Not good at all. Wangji is wearing sweatpants and Wei Ying is crawling towards him with a lazy, pleased grin on his face and – fuck! Wangji does not want to pop a boner in front of his brother and stupid Nie Mingjue right now.
Wei Ying plops down and lays his head on Wangji’s lap when he reaches him. This is the most drunk Wangji has ever seen him. It’s… dangerous.
“Lan Zhan, Lan Zhan,” Wei Ying sighs, smiling dizzily up at him. “What’s better than Friday nights with Lan Zhan? Emperor’s Smile is warm. Lan Zhan is warm! Wei Ying is warm!”
This might be the first time Lan Zhan has ever seen Wei Ying truly drunk, he thinks… and… he doesn’t mind. It’s incredible how fast his murderous rage evaporates with Wei Ying soft and warm on his lap.
Maybe… Wangji won’t mind Nie Mingjue coming over if he can see drunk Wei Ying every Friday night.
He runs his fingers through Wei Ying’s hair and can actually feel his heart physically grow when Wei Ying leans into his touch.
“I think Wei Ying has had enough to drink tonight,” Wangji murmurs.
“Hng, yeah,” Wei Ying sighs, eyes fluttering closed, “If Lan Zhan says so…”
Ugh, Wei Ying is so cute Wangji can’t take it! It’s torture! He wants to erect a 10 foot wall around himself so no one other than himself can witness drunk Wei Ying’s cuteness.
A loud snore interrupts Wangji from his admiration of Wei Ying.
Nie Mingjue is splayed back on the couch, his huge arms stretched across the entire length of the couch, his huge chest heaving up and down rhythmically.
“Da-ge, da-ge,” Xichen says, shaking the giant gently.
Nie Mingjue opens one eye. “Xichen?” he asks blearily, before throwing a huge arm around Xichen and dragging Wangji’s brother into his huge chest.
Xichen… looks… delighted.
Gross.
Wangji tucks his arms under Wei Ying’s body and picks him up.
“Do you need help, brother?” he asks – just out of politeness more than anything.
“Uh… no,” Xichen says, a blush creeping up onto his cheeks, “I’ll be fine…”
“Mn,” Wangji hums and takes Wei Ying into his room. He tucks Wei Ying in and slides in next to him.
“Don’t like Nie Mingjue more than me,” Wangji whispers, trying to evade Wei Ying’s subconscious. “Wei Ying loves Lan Zhan the most. Wei Ying loves Lan Zhan the most.”
“Wei Ying loves Lan Zhan the most,” Wei Ying repeats sleepily back at him, curling into Lan Zhan’s chest.
Wei Ying is so good!
Wangji slips his arm under Wei Ying’s head and drags him so that his perfect head is laid upon Wangji’s chest.
Hah! Stupid Nie Mingjue can drink with Wei Ying all he wants. Wangji is the one who will have Wei Ying, soft and agreeable, at the end of the night!
Xichen has never made a mistake in his life, and even when he fucks up, Wangji guesses it isn’t too bad.
Wangji goes to bed that night with his good opinion of his brother restored.
#the untamed#mdzs#wangxian#nielan#wei wuxian#lan zhan#lan xichen#nie mingjue#My fic#idk i just needed something happy and light 4 me lol
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Devotion
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𖥸 AN: After binging the entire manga in a weekend, Eren Jaeger has come back to reclaim his title as the love of my life, and this is just the result.
𖥸 WC: 2.4K
𖥸 TW: Blasphemy; Eren’s has a god complex; blood; Face fucking; Eren is not gentle and not nice at all; manipulation; unhealthy relationships
· ·────────── ·𖥸· ──────────· ·
You didn’t mean for it to get this far, not at first. Your brother didn’t tell you exactly what you were doing, just that you would be helping an old friend of his. When you saw Eren there, long hair tied back with tired eyes, your heart jumped and lodged itself in your throat, not allowing your words the room to escape. Your brother’s “friend” was Eren Jaeger, a wanted war criminal that your brother believed held the power of god.
“Why are you here?” Eren asked coldly when you first came to visit him, not turning to face you.
“I don’t know. Floch sent me.”
At the mention of your brother’s name, Eren finally looked at you. He made his way over to the front of his cell, peering at you intently with tired emerald eyes.
“Floch sent you?”
You had to crane your neck to meet Eren’s eyes.
“Yes, that’s my brother.”
“Oh, so you’re it then,” Eren mused. He reached out, twirling a lock of your hair in his fingers. “At least you’re cute. What’s your name again?”
You blushed at Eren’s compliment, looking down at your hands and fidgeting with your fingers. You mumbled a brief thank you and told Eren your name.
“Pretty,” he said apathetically.
“What use could I be to you?” you asked.
After your brother had told you about Eren’s plan, you wanted desperately to help, despite your lack of military training. You had never seen your brother so animated and passionate about anything. To your brother, Eren was a god—a great leader destined to restore the greatness of the Eldian Empire. To you, Eren was not only this, but your brother’s savior as well.
“What use do you think you could be to me?” Eren asked, his icy in his voice pierced your heart. He raised a hand between the bars to trail up your body, settling on your breast and giving a squeeze.
“I don’t understand,” you said, confused.
Eren pulled your arm into the cell to place your hand over his hardening bulge.
“I—,” you said, panic in your voice at the realization of what he wanted. “Sir, h-here?”
“Do you see me going anywhere soon?” Eren replied, his voice devoid of emotion.
“Okay,” you said, as though trying to work yourself up. You were doing a great favor to your brother—and to the world—in helping Eren. “Okay.”
“Good. Now,” Eren commanded. “Hold up your skirt.”
“Yes, sir,” you said meekly. Stepping back, you lifted your skirt and apron to give Eren a view of your white cotton panties.
“Sir? I think you can do better,” Eren said with a smirk, sizing you up with cold eyes. “On your knees.”
You did as you were told, releasing your skirt before dropping to your knees. The damp, cold floor sent chills up your spine.
You watched from below as Eren pulled his pants down, pumping himself to full hardness. Eren stood with his erect cock between two of the bars, stopping just in front of your face.
To say you were nervous would have been an understatement. You weren’t completely lacking in sexual experience, but you faltered at the sight of Eren’s massive length. Eren was long. He was of average girth, but you still paled at the thought of how small you were compared to him. The head was a pretty purplish color, and multiple veins ran down the length of it.
“What’re you staring at?” Eren smirked. He held the base of his cock and tapped the head against your lips. “Are you just gonna stare or are you going to do something?”
You tentatively lapped at the slit, precum already beading, before dipping down and licking up one of the veins running along his cock. You wrapped your lips around the spongy head, sucking gently, hesitantly, until bobbing your head and finally finding a pace that felt natural to you.
What he didn’t have of his cock between the cell bars, Eren languidly stroked, matching the pace you had set. He looked down at you. Your face was scrunched in concentration as you focused on making him feel good.
“Enjoying yourself?” Eren chuckled.
You looked up at him from under long lashes with doey eyes before humming in acknowledgment.
“At least someone here is.”
You pulled off with a lewd pop and a gasp for breath.
“What do you mean? Does it not feel good? I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” You were desperate for Eren’s approval.
“Do I look like I want to hear your apologies?” Eren glared down at you. “You said you wanted to be useful. Worship it.”
Eren fit his arm through the cell and grabbed a fistful of your hair before shoving your head back to cock.
Without needing further prompting, you popped your mouth open for Eren to slam his hips against the bars while pushing your down on as much as his cock as he could fit. Your nose was a fraction of an inch from curly tufts of Eren’s hair.
Eren’s pulled you off his cock just long enough for you to cough and take a new breath before shoving your back down, the tip of his cock hitting the back of your throat.
“Through your nose, sweetheart,” he said, devoid of emotion as you choked and sputtered around him, drool seeping out the corner of your mouth. “For such a whore, you really are quite innocent.”
Eren set a much rougher pace, fucking your face through the bars of his underground cell like you were in a gloryhole that was made specially for him. The noises coming from you resembled that of gagging, but were not quite the same. It was wetter, lewder, and spurred Eren on more.
Despite the tears tickling in your eyes at Eren’s hard cock shoving down the wet walls of your throat, you found yourself growing uncomfortably wet. You shifted to relieve the growing ache in your clit, not going unnoticed by Eren. The man towering over you fit his lower leg through the bars of the cell. With the toe of his boot, he nudged your knees apart before lifting to rub his boot against your aching bud.
You moaned at the contact, vibrations humming against Eren’s cock deep in your throat. You started humping Eren’s boot as you continued to let him fuck your face.
“Getting off on my boot?” Eren teased you. “Is that all it takes? You are such a filthy whore.”
Your heart clenched at the sting of Eren’s cruel words. Groans from Eren signaled he was approaching his end, his cock twitching in your mouth and throat.
“Do you want me to paint that pretty face?” Eren asked, tone condescending, knowing you were unable to answer with his cock stuffing your mouth.
You tried your best to respond, sounds bubbling around Eren’s cock unable to make distinguishable words. Suddenly, Eren pulled out. You looked up at him in confusion, blinking through the tears.
“Was it not good?” you pouted. “I’m sorry.”
“I’d rather fill that sloppy pussy of yours,” he stated flatly. “Stand up.”
You stood on command, knees aching. You wiped the drool off your mouth with the back of your hand and straightened your skirt, brushing off the dirt on your apron from the cold ground.
Eren found that he would rather manhandle you into submission himself than just ask you. It was easier for him and harder on you. Eren grabbed your body, forcing you to turn back around, and once again, you found yourself back on your knees on the cold grounds. Eren gave a shove at your back, and you fell face first into the ground. Your nose hit the floor with a sickening crunch. You raised a hand to the blood trickling out your nose and over your lips.
“I’m okay!” you chirped, as though Eren would have stopped if you were otherwise.
Giving a small hum of acknowledgement, Eren flipped your skirt up and pulled your panties down to your knees, giving him the perfect view of your hot cunt, shining with your juices.
“Look at this perfect pussy,” Eren breathed. He traced your wet folds with the head of cock. Eren gave small thrusts, purposefully angling to tease you and press against your clit. “Remind me to thank your brother for his kind offer.”
Delirious with want, you looked back at your lover and wiggled your hips against him to pull him into your gummy walls. Eren responded with a resounding slap against your ass that had you yelping in surprise and pain.
“Impatient bitch,” he said. “If you want it so bad, then beg for it.”
“Eren please,” you started. “Please I want you.”
“You can do better than that.” Eren gave another slap to your backside. He placed the head of his cock right at your entrance, the heat emanating from you trying to entice him in.
“Eren, please. Please, Eren,” you begged. “Please, I want you. I need you Eren. Please.”
“Do you think you deserve it?” Another slap.
Eren continued his assault on your ass until it glowed red and you were sobbing. Tears poured over your cheeks, mixing with the blood dripping from your nose.
“Yes! Eren, please. Please, just fuck me already, Eren,” you sobbed, choking on the salty metallic mix of snot, tears, and blood. “Please, Eren. I want you so bad, it hurts. It hurts, Eren.”
“It hurts? We can’t have that,” Eren teased you.
Eren slowly inched his cock in, giving you time to adjust to his size. Eren was large, especially in comparison to your smaller frame. He always stretched you out in the most delicious of ways, but the sensation was almost too much for you after going so long without. You moaned as Eren bottomed out in you. Your walls clenched in involuntary, rhythmic pulses around him.
“It feels so good, so good,” you mewled pathetically, already puddy in Eren’s hands.
“Say thank you, then,” Eren commanded.
“Thank you!” you squeaked as Eren pulled out, only to slam in. “Thank you, Eren! Thank you!”
Eren jerked you up by your dress before threading a hand in your hair. He pressed your back against the cold metal of the cell. One arm snaked around the bars to wrap around your waist and hold you in place. Detangling from your hair, Eren slapped a large hand over your mouth, nearly covering half your face. The sting sent tears prickling in the corners of your eyes and the resounding slap echoed in the underground cells.
“Quiet,” he growled low in your ear, sending even more shivers down your spine. “You don’t want them to hear. They’ll take you away from me.”
You whimpered as Eren’s thrust began to pick up in power and speed. Sweat dripped down the planes of his hard muscles.
“Is that what you want? To take you away and never see me again?” Each threat punctuated by a particularly rough thrust that would send you to the floor if not for Eren’s arm, hard with years of muscle, wrapped through the bars of his cell around your waist, pressing you back against them.
“You won’t get a cell by me, no. You’ll get your own far far away. It’s not just you they’ll punish. They’ll keep you as far away from me as possible if that’s what they think will hurt me the most. Is that what you want? To leave me, to hurt me?”
You shook your head violently. Your heart broke at the thought of someone taking you away from him, at the thought of being separated, and even more at the thought of being the source of pain to you and your brother’s beloved Eren. More tears spilled over your cheeks, diluting the blood from your nose that dripped down Eren’s hand around your mouth.
“Then I suggest you keep that mouth shut.”
The lewd sound of wet skin slapping echoed throughout the underground jail, mixed with Eren’s low groans, his hushed filthy whispers, and your muffled sobs against his hand.
“You feel so good, baby,” Eren groaned right in your ear.
You whimpered against Eren’s hand as he bruised your insides. Eren was simply too big for you, and each thrust felt like you were getting deliciously split in half.
Eren removed his hand from your mouth in favor of snaking it down your torso to rub your clit. Two fingers made slow small circles on your sensitive bud. Eren’s thrusts slowed, but held more power, battering at your cervix.
“Oh my god, Eren,” you whined.
“So I’m your god now?” Eren toyed with you. Behind you, his face broke out in a smirk, a dangerous glow in his usually tired eyes.
“Yes, Eren,” you cried. “My god. My Eren.” Tears fell freely at how good Eren was making you feel.
“You’re so pretty when you cry,” he cooed. “You gonna cum for me when I say so.”
Weakly, you nodded.
“There’s my good girl, my sweet girl.”
Eren’s hand on your clit continued its slow circles, increasing the pressure. His arm wrapped tightly around your waist loosened its grip, and Eren trailed that hand up your torso, stopping at your neck to give a slight squeeze.
“Cum,” Eren’s deep voice rumbled against you as he pressed your clit and squeezed harder around your fragile neck.
You threw your head back, ignoring the sting of hitting the metals bars. The clanging of the metal rang throughout the empty underground, mixing with your cries of ecstasy as your juices poured out of you around Eren’s cock. Desperate chants of Eren’s name fell off your lips like a prayer as your walls clenched around him in earthquake-like spasms. Neither of you cared any longer about the noise you made.
“You’re gonna take all this cum, right?” Eren growled, nearing his end. “Don’t waste a single drop. It’s your god’s cum, right?”
“Yes,” you sobbed, exhausted from your own climax. “Gonna take it all.”
“Good girl,” Eren said in rare praise that sent your heart soaring. “My sweet, pretty girl. Take your god’s cum.”
Eren’s hips stuttered as he reached his own peak. His hips slammed into yours once more and he squeezed his large hand once again around your neck, cutting off your air. Hot ropes of sticky white painted your pulsing heat as Eren came with a low, guttural groan.
Eren pulled your panties up immediately, rubbing the crotch against your sopping cunt and mixing your fluids.
“Don’t waste a single drop,” he growled. “That’s god’s cum.”
· ·────────── ·𖥸· ──────────· ·
#eren jaeger x reader#eren jeager#tw blasphemy#tw blood#Eren is not nice at all#disgustingly self insert#my god i love him
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If your requests are still open, how about the dreamers finding out they can communicate with one another in the dream realm, once they go to sleep? I mean they have a debate about the knight In Game so i assume they can
"Is this it?"
"This is it."
"This is all?"
"You sound rather unimpressed, your majesty."
"Aren't you, scientist?"
"I didn't come in with any particular expectations. I imagine many people die that way."
"We are not dead. We only Dream. This realm allows for far more freedom than oblivion."
"The preacher man expected oblivion. Is that the common belief about the afterlife among your people?"
"That is not what I am."
"I daresay none of us are much of anything, anymore. I can't feel my tendrils."
"I suppose I agree. This doesn't feel like mundane dreaming did."
"... I find it a little familiar. It feels something like the days spent under such pressure where one spends some hours as if outside themself, looking in on their own life from over the shoulder."
"... Lurien, you describe experiencing a dissociative state. Did that happen often?"
"Hush, you two. I'm trying to focus."
"Focus what, Herrah?"
"Your king promised we'd get to see everything from in here. Look past the gold. I can see a structure."
"...She's right. It looks like you might be able to keep your title as Watcher after all. But now with coworkers."
"...So I can."
"And you mean cell mates."
"The difference is variable, depending on the job."
"Ha."
"...Lady Monomon, are those not the resting grounds?"
"It does look like it. It appears the King has erected some sort of shrine for us. A big one, too."
"Hm. What was that you said about this not being death, Watcher? Or am I misunderstanding what 'the resting grounds' might be?"
"..."
"If there's one difference between us and the dead, at least, it's that we have the option to see more than the cemetery where we're honored. Herrah, Lurien, where to first?"
-
"Is that your daughter, Beast?"
"Of course."
"The resemblance has gotten striking over the years. Have you really never seen her, Lurien?"
"No. If memory still serves in this place, meetings where I had been present were usually brief and business."
"Oh, what a shame. Herrah's daughter had been so cute as a nymph."
"I have never really… gotten along with children."
"Then you definitely wouldn't have with mine. She never would tolerate awkwardness. Neither was she ever shy about deploying her venom."
"The similarities aren't just physical, then."
"Oh, you."
"..."
"...Is she…?"
"...Oh."
"I've never seen your daughter--"
"Stop looking."
"--cry before."
"Enough. Leave her in peace, both of you, get out."
"And go where? We are cell mates, remember?"
"I don't care. Anywhere but here. Please, leave us alone."
-
"Such a grand entryway alone. Your archive is an aesthetic marvel."
"You should have seen it in its heyday. These halls were once abuzz with life. Famed scholars and lively young students alike would roam about, speaking to each other about absolutely everything, often with the urgency of a bit too much caffeine."
"It sounds tiresome. ...I mean no offense, of course."
"I do see how the atmosphere would have been tiresome for someone like you. I wonder if it will ever again be how I remember."
"It must be restored, once your replacement is hired."
"There were no plans for a replacement."
"What?"
"The archive can sustain itself for a time. The nature of storing our texts in acid means they will never be lost to decay, and anything important will be nigh impossible to steal. The only danger would be if a husk roamed in and started smashing glass vats, but none of the more volatile ones will make it past the ooma. Perhaps one day this place shall again double as a research center or university. That is for the King to decide. My only wish for it had been the preservation of the knowledge within."
"That is very wise."
"... What do you have on your mind? Speak it."
"Hm?"
"I am a teacher. I am well acquainted with the look one gets when they have something to say, but aren't sure they can. I tried so hard to foster an atmosphere where all could ask their questions in this place. You wouldn't be exempt from honoring that."
"... Right. Did… did any of your students survive?"
"...The infection was devastating out here. Those who got sick were especially accident prone, with all the ooma and acid work done here. There were many disasters. I eventually had to have the place evacuated. I know not the fates of those who had nowhere else to go, but it would have been too dangerous to allow them to stay in the dorms."
"... Towards the end, many young academics began flocking to the churches. Many for sanctuary from the rain, and food. Some for comfort."
"I see."
"... Will you seek them out?"
"... Not now. Perhaps in the future. I have had my fill of tragedy, for tonight."
"I understand."
"You have that look again. And you so hesitate to call yourself curious."
"I am not. I simply remembered… er. I don't wish to overstep."
"That's funny."
"Pardon?!"
"Look at where we are. Look at what we are. In all likelihood, we'll all be together for eternity. I'd rather not spend that eternity still having to adhere to the rules of etiquette that shackled those of our caste in life. Just speak. If I am offended, I won't answer."
"Hmph. ...Your 'Quirrel'. Does he yet live?"
"... Yes. He carries something beyond the bounds of Hallownest that will act as extra protection for me."
"But the curse--?!"
"He is also protected. The King himself ensured it. I am nothing if not meticulous."
"... You will not be able to see him, out there."
"... I can sense him, still. It's like-- it feels like someone's stuck used gum inside my skull and is stretching one end of it as far as it will go."
"Does it hurt?"
"I don't know. It's new."
"Let it bring you peace, then. You and yours do still live, safeguarded."
"He was never mine."
"If you say so."
"...What? Have you still more to say?"
"You are familiar with the habits of students. I am familiar with the habits of the devoted. He was yours. He still is."
"I do not wish to speak about this."
"You are the one who prompted me."
"You were never so chatty before."
"Chatty?! Good Teacher, that is highly--"
"There, that's more like our Watcher."
-
"So this is your City of Tears."
"You've never seen it?"
"Your king offered me a tour, once. When he was trying to convince me to sacrifice myself in the first place. Like he thought if I saw whatever splendor and beauty he sees in his own creations, I might agree."
"But you declined?"
"To be perfectly honest, I thought it'd be much brighter, and didn't want to deal with it. His presence already gave me a headache, nevermind his palace."
"Do not speak so cavalierly about our King."
"Do not forget that I am a royal as well. I shall speak however I'd like about my equals."
"You are not equal to the gods."
"Peace, Lurien. She may not be, but… well, can you name any other mortal who once brought one to bed?"
"That's right, isn't it? Perhaps equal isn't even the right word. Someone did have to be on top."
"Pfft--!"
"Th… This is blasphemous. I am not listening."
"So, which one was it?"
"For the love of all that the guiding light grants us please, please be silent."
"Seek me out for a chat later, Monomon. Perhaps while the Watcher is busy praying."
“Herrah, go easy on the poor bug. He might combust.”
“You know, now that I’m here, I think I do rather like the look of your city. Though I can’t imagine how your Watcher saw anything through the gloom from his tower.”
“I am still here.”
“Well then, how did you?”
“I had a telescope.”
“...A telescope pointed down into people’s homes?”
“I could not see inside--”
“You make it sound like you once tried, Lurien.”
“I didn’t--You--That--”
“I wouldn’t try to argue with your Teacher. She’s rather good with logic.”
“Can we please move on.”
-
"..."
"..."
"..."
"...Can you see it, in there?"
"No. Though it is our likenesses carved into the door, it seems even we are locked out."
"Such is the power of the King's seal. Nothing shall ever enter that place again."
"Nor exit it."
"Poor creature."
"Our King was quite clear. It is not a creature. It is a Vessel. A lockbox in the shape of a bug."
"It contains the means to store power within its void. I did much research on the void during the Vessel's planning stages, and it all still sits in my archive. But I cannot say much about the Vessel itself, beyond what it can do."
"Is that right?"
"Do you presume to know something we do not, Beast?"
"I doubt that. I only know that it had your King's eyes."
"..."
"..."
-
"How long have we been asleep?"
"We may never be able to know."
"But the kingdom has not yet recovered. Not really."
"The infected still die. They are still infected."
"We cannot hear Her in here. Her clutch no longer chokes the walls and bubbles through the soil itself. Our duty holds."
-
"The King is dead."
"He Dreams. Not dead."
"He doesn't Dream anywhere we can reach him. He created his own."
"He took the entire palace."
"He is not dead."
"You have been watching him all this time. He was sick. He was infected. Not by Her, but that power that drains all. That drained his children."
"He will return. Our duty holds."
"Duty to whom, Watcher?"
"We can't escape anyway. We can't let her out. Not while people still live, and not while she is contained."
-
"She hasn't grown."
"Eternity in stasis. That is the only way a kingdom can be eternal."
"My daughter. She hasn't grown."
"How long have we been here?"
"Longer than the King has been gone."
"Not gone."
"Not here."
"My baby."
-
“Has the Vessel failed?”
“She is free. The seals have failed.”
“The seals still hold. Our duty still holds.”
-
"There was another."
"How did it leave? What did it want?"
"It matters not. The protector struck it down before it could bring any harm. None can reach the seals."
“It should have. One must.”
"Call her by name. No one has done that in so long. No one is left to do that for her. Use her name."
"Do you remember it? Do you remember yours?"
-
“Would it seek to break the Seals?”
“They cannot be undone.”
“They must be undone.”
“Let us sleep, little shadow. Return to your darkness. Allow us our peace.”
#hollow knight#herrah#lurien#monomon#here have some freeform#because i love dialogue#and i love their spooky ingame interactions#anon#thank you anon!#glad you seemed to like my recent dreamer fic#drabble
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Can i request fic of arkin,asa and abby where asa gets curious on how arkin will react to abby making advancements and well he watches arkin and abby start fucking but eventually asa decides to join in on the fun?
So I thought... hey that sounds fun. It'll be a nice quick write up. Well. 1,995 words later it's larger than expected. I HOPE YOU'RE PROUD OF YOURSELF
I switch POVs through out because I wanted to.
warnings for breathplay, throat stepping
--Arkin--
It must’ve been hours, Arkin could barely feel his fingertips. He’d been left tied and gagged in a bare room. He’d managed to loosen the ropes somewhat, given enough time he could probably work his way out of them. He’d rather find something sharp to cut them with. He had wiggled to the edge of the room in hopes of finding something. An old nail or screw, anything.
He heard the dead bolts open on the door. He was ready to brace himself, expecting to be dragged off somewhere.
But instead, a young woman was shoved into the room. The door locked loudly behind her.
She was obviously another victim. She had old wounds on one of her hands. While she had intact clothes, they were still grubby. And she had the same haunted expression of someone who’d seen a lot of death.
She also seemed very unsure about why she was there. She had noticed Arkin then looked back at the door.
Carefully, she edged her way over to him, obviously checking for traps as she went.
Arkin made a pleading sound through the gag. Even if this was some kind of weird trick by the killer, she might at least get him out of the ropes.
She did crouch down and pull his gag free.
“...get me out of this!” Arkin said, managing to not sound as desperate as he felt.
She hesitated and looked back at the door again. “I don’t--I think he’s testing us…” her voice was shaky and uncertain.
Arkin strained against the ropes keeping his arms behind his back. The freak had used a weird overly complicated series of knots that kept his arms together. “I don’t give a fuck what he’s doing!” he said in frustration. “Help me outta this!”
--Abby--
Abby had seen the tied up man before, on the monitors in His room. She had asked about him. Predictably, she got no verbal response. He had simply gestured to her then the screen. He wanted to know why she was interested. “He’s… he’s kind of cute,” she said nervously, she hoped showing interest in someone that wasn’t Him wasn’t against the rules. She shrank back just in case it was.
Instead He made a hand motion that meant he agreed with her.
Just a few hours later she found herself shoved into a room with the same man. Only now he was tied up and helpless on the floor.
She usually could guess what He wanted from her, but this time she was at a loss. Was this a weird gift? A test? A trick?
The least she could do was take out his gag.
He did look better in person than the monitors. Did He tie him up <i>for</i> her? Or was he dangerous? She edged back, he certainly wasn’t happy, that could be bad.
Perhaps sensing this, the tied man’s voice went softer. “Hey. It’s okay… I’m Arkin, what’s your name?”
“Abby…”
“Okay, Abby. Listen, my hands are going numb. Can you at least try to loosen the ropes? He wouldn’t have put you in here if he didn’t want you to do something.”
Did Arkin understand Him too?
“O-Okay…”
--Asa--
It was going well, he thought. He’ll leave them in there together for a few hours, or maybe a day, and see if anything changes. While there were a few outcomes he would like to see, he was more interested in seeing what they chose to do on their own. He could have easily told Abby precisely what he wanted but chose not to.
He’ll stay the night at the hotel to keep an eye on them. He had no pressing unmasked matters to attend to tomorrow. It would be a shame to miss anything interesting.
--Arkin--
It took a lot of coaxing for Arkin to convince Abby to at least untie his legs. She was very concerned with making the masked man angry. The masked man remained silent for her too, leaving her to guess what he wanted and hope she was right. She’d definitely been here longer than Arkin.
Then they were just left alone in that room.
They sat on the floor in an uneasy silence. She eventually moved to sit next to Arkin and leaned into him. He didn’t question it, they were in a fairly cool room and she had on a sleeveless dress.
“I think it’s safe to untie me,” he told her gently.
She curled up against his side, she still looked apprehensive but not as fearful as she was. She clearly wasn’t ready to untie him, however. They stayed like that and eventually, they both fell asleep.
It wasn’t the most comfortable sleep but it was… comforting. Not just for the shared body heat.
In between bouts of fitful sleep, Abby finally decided to untie him. Again, he didn’t question it, he just groaned as blood flow slowly restored itself. His arms felt heavy and hurt. The ropes had left clear indentations down his arms.
She curled herself against him again, this time taking one of his arms in hers. She rubbed her hands up and down his forearm, where most of the rope marks were left. It felt amazingly good. His arms and shoulders had almost completely cramped up. She mumbled a barely audible apology, as her hands worked further up his arm.
Arkin could barely string together words in reply, because of the pure relief of pain being rubbed away. “...it’s fine,” he managed to slur out. He really did understand why she didn’t untie him sooner.
She moved her hands to his other arm, which turned into him spooning her on the floor. It wasn’t a conscious effort on his part, it just seemed like the natural thing to do.
Things began to shift as she rubbed his forearm. It took him a moment to realize his hand had settled against her inner thigh. She was still rubbing the knots in his arm and didn’t seem to care where his hand was.
Then her hand moved to his wrist and very gently guided his hand between her legs.
Should they really be doing this?
“The rules are different here,” Abby said, turning her head back to look at him.
She was right. They were prisoners to a murderer who enjoyed inflicting pain. There was rarely a moment where he felt anything else. Arkin shifted to bring her back flush to his chest. He slid his hand fully between her legs. There wasn’t much in the way of clothing to get past. His fingers slid down and found she was already quite wet.
God, what did that freak do to them to make them like this?
He slid his fingers back up, working a circular motion until he found her clit. She let out a small gasp. It was encouraging, despite not knowing her, just to get a positive reaction from someone. Someone who isn’t actively trying to hurt him.
She tried to stay quiet, with only little squeaks escaping. Generally, Arkin would prefer a more vocal partner but like she said, the rules are different here. The masked freak could be watching or listening. For some twisted reason, the thought actually excited him. He’ll just try to push that as far out of his mind as he can.
--Abby--
She still wasn’t sure if what they were doing was allowed. She hoped it was. It seemed likely. He left her in here with Arkin far longer than she’s been around any of the others. Maybe, He wanted her to have this?
This felt very good. Arkin kept varying the speed he moved his fingers. He’d slow down if she made louder sounds. Was he a tease or was he worried they’d get caught?
The first time she came, she closed a hand over her mouth. It was safer to be quiet. Her other hand desperately gripped his forearm. He did not stop, with her mouth covered he seemed to take that as an invitation to speed up. Two fingers slid down to press inside her for a moment then he went right back to her clit.
When she came the second time, she ground her hips back into him. He’d had an erection for a while, she’d felt it, but he wasn’t doing anything about it. She ground back again, getting a little grunt out of him. It was surprisingly gratifying.
Finally, she decided to do something about it. She turned around to face him and gently pushed him onto his back. She opened his pants, her fingers brushing over his dick. He drew in a hissing breath.
“Okay?” she asked cautiously. He just nodded in response.
She straddled his hips and let out a long breath. She took a moment to just slide her wet and swollen labia against his dick. He made a cute little choking sound; he was trying very hard not to make noise.
She shifted her hips and let his dick slide into her. She had gotten very tight after repeated orgasms.
Now it was even harder for him to keep quiet.
The door opened.
--Asa--
Asa was very pleased to see Abby reacted just as he expected. She immediately covered Arkin’s mouth with her hands and told him to not move. He heard her repeat “Just wait.” over and over to Arkin. She kept her gaze averted and pulled her shoulders together in her usual show of submission. Arkin, however, looked like he was ready to jump up at any second. But he was following Abby’s instructions.
He stood in the doorway long enough to convey he was not angry. If he had been angry he would’ve rushed in. No, this was working out better than expected.
He took slow measured steps toward them. His head tilted as he looked them over. He moved his hand in a signal for them to continue.
Abby understood, of course, but looked apprehensive. Arkin, predictably, looked angry, he also understood.
Arkin growled and tore Abby’s hands off his mouth. “You fuc--” is all he got out before Asa moved forward and stepped on his neck. Just enough pressure to keep him quiet and struggled to breathe.
He gestured to Abby to continue.
And she did. Her hips rocked against Arkin.
Arkin struggled and clawed at his boot and leg.
Asa let out a low pleased hum.
Abby relaxed, as she always did when she understood what he wanted. He ran his hand through her hair to reinforce it.
She performed beautifully. She started to move with more force. Actively fucking herself on Arkin’s dick.
---Arkin---
It’s completely insane!
He’s gasping for air, trying to get the freak’s boot off his throat. Yet, somehow, he’s still fucking hard. And the monster is encouraging her!
Logically, he understands that she has no choice. In the moment, he can’t help but feel betrayed. She’s doing what the monster wants!
The worst of it is, it feels good.
He glanced up to see a hungry look in the man’s eyes. A little jolt of pleasure hit him and he almost felt sick.
Abby suddenly ground into him, which brought a new wave of pleasure. He choked against the man’s boot.
When he glanced up again, the man’s dick was out and Abby was running his tongue up and down it.
Arkin tried to scream but the boot came down harder, his air completely cut off. He felt Abby’s muscles spasm on his dick. He could hear her actually moaning now.
His vision started to darken but he could see the man bury his dick deep into her throat. An orgasm hit her so hard it felt like she was trying to crush his dick.
Just barely hanging on to consciousness, he saw the man pull out. A string of cum fell directly on Arkin's face.
A sick pleasure ripped through him seconds before he blacked out
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Never Look Away
Summary: Dean and Cas are forced to redefine their relationship as a decade old secret between them finally comes to light.
Dean jumps up, strangely offended.
“Okay, first of all, you’ve seen my browser history. Your true form doesn’t even make my top 10 weirdest things I’ve jerked off to, so that's a load of bull..."
Notes: This is the result of listening to Never Look Away by Vienna Teng for 10 hours gay.
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Careful not to wake him, Dean traces the outlines of Cas’s body illuminated by the reddish hues of the morning sun with his fingers. He can hardly believe it’s only been a year since they defeated God and pulled Cas out of the Empty with the promise of a love returned.
So much has changed in such little time. With the illusion of free will no longer binding Dean to a greater destiny and with Cas and Dean’s own feelings out in the open he finally allowed himself to want all the things he denied himself for so long, always prioritizing other people’s happiness over his own. Now he has it all. A house, a job, a family, a life, Cas. It was so hard at first, to stop looking for hunts and letting go of Sam so he too could start his own life with Eileen by his side, but in the end Dean had been too tired to fight his own desires any longer and gave in.
Fuck the voice of his father telling him his only purpose in life was to watch out for Sammy and fuck the man John wanted him to be. He helped save this world so he gets to live in it in whatever way he wants to and what he wants is to live his cheesy apple pie life waking up every day next to the man he loves.
Cas stirs in his sleep and Dean watches the translucent wings flutter against the light seemingly drinking up the morning sun. They used to be pitch black back when they first met. A beautiful sight, yet not quite fitting the man Cas would eventually become.
Then they burned and Dean could barely stomach to look at them knowing how much the culmination of all of Dean’s mistakes had hurt Cas so irreparably. And now the wings are whole again and even more awe-inspiring than before. Something about Dean rescuing Cas from the Empty or maybe a blessing from Jack has restored them leaving Dean with the desperate urge to touch the intangible. Watching one of the smaller eyes on Cas’ wings slowly flutter open Dean wonders if it would be rude to ask about the colour change and chuckles. The way the wings shimmer with all the colours of the rainbow is just so wonderfully, blatantly gay.
“What’s so funny?” Cas mumbles half asleep as a couple more eyes flutter open searching for the source of Dean’s amusement.
Dean leans over, one hand caressing Cas’ jaw and kisses him softly good morning.
“I just love you so damn much.” He whispers only inches away from his husband’s mouth and rests his forehead against Cas’.
Cas moves back to study Dean’s face questioningly. The familiar stare is so much more intense now that Dean can take all of Cas in without suffering through the burning sensation that always accompanied laying his eyes on something filled with angelic grace.
Dean swallows hard. Having all of Cas�� eyes so solely focussed on him and him alone is such a major turn on. He must be doing it on purpose. It’s unfair how such a simple action has so much of an effect on Dean.
“I don’t understand how that’s funny.” Cas says, one eyebrow raised.
“Then come and find out.”
Dean’s mind is already too far gone to care for the conversation and he pulls Cas closer by his shirt desperate to embrace the parts of Cas that he can actually touch. Now fully awake, Cas reciprocates the action enthusiastically pressing their lips together earnestly and climbing on top of Dean to explore his body with his hands and mouth. Not for the first time Dean curses his past self for not allowing himself to be loved by Cas years ago. There’s so much time they have yet to make up for. Luckily they’re both more than willing to try.
Dean’s musings are cut short when Cas’ attentions move downward as Dean’s legs get pushed apart and Cas presses against Dean’s growing erection.
“Fuck, Cas!” Dean groans and sees new galaxies forming inside Cas’ body. Always good to know that Cas enjoys this as much as Dean does.
The prodding stops and Dean lets out an embarrassing whine.
“Not yet.” Cas teases with a grin, all of his eyes’ attention once again on Dean alone. The bastard. Dean has half the mind to hit him upwards with his knee in retaliation, but soon gets distracted by Cas intertwining his hands with Dean’s and leaning down slowly to kiss the sensitive spot on Dean’s neck. He gasps and moves his neck so Cas can take him apart much easier.
In their closeness Cas’ celestial body engulfs Dean in his entirety and he is left again, breathless, by the unfathomable sight of his lover’s true form. Stars and skies in colours not named by men expand and swirl inside the translutient depths of the oceans and galaxies that make up the angels body as the golden halos’ luminescence submerges them both in it’s light. Dean would lose himself in the sight if it weren’t for the thousands of eyes, holding the knowledge of millenia, watching him unblinkingly in a way that is so Cas, so human, that Dean can’t see anything else but his stupid socially awkward self-sacrificing husband.
“Fuck, you’re beautiful.” Dean blurts out, giving voice to his thoughts.
Cas flinches away as if burned, his true form doing much the same. He wavers back against the bedroom wall as far away as possible from his vessel and curls in on himself. At least Dean assumes that’s what Cas is trying to do. Cas' true form, once taller than any skyscraper, has shrunk significantly with the absence of grace powering him up, but is still far too large to fit completely inside a house let alone a room.
“What’s wrong?” Dean asks sitting up.
Cas turns away, his eyes fluttering across the room looking for an escape. Dean gingerly places a hand on Cas’ shoulder and is relieved when he’s not pushed away.
“Hey, Cas, buddy. Whatever it is, you can tell me. I know it’s weird coming from me, but let’s not do this again. No more unnecessary secrets. Please.”
Cas takes Dean’s hand into his and nods. One slow measured breath and he starts talking.
“Dean, I- I know you can’t help seeing me this way, but I dislike it when you comment on my appearance.”
Cas’ vessel is still turned away, but out of the corner of his eyes Dean can see Cas, the real Cas, watching his reaction with interest.
“Well, uh, okay, if it makes you uncomfortable I can stop.” Dean starts awkwardly. “But let me assure you there is absolutely no reason for you to feel insecure about the way you look, you’re-” Dean trails off. You’re mind blowingly gorgeous and sometimes your beauty is so overwhelming that I’m scared I’ll cry if I look too closely.
At Dean's words, Cas finally turns to face him.
“I’m not ‘insecure’, Dean.” Cas bites out emphasizing his irritation with air quotes. “In fact my true form is counted as one of the most attractive among my brethren.”
Dean raises an eyebrow. No argument there. Cas is by far the prettiest angel he’s ever seen.
“And I am well aware that you find my vessel visually pleasing, but Dean, what you’re complimenting is not me. It’s Jimmy Novak.”
“Uh, Jimmy’s a good looking guy for sure, but the one who’s beautiful is definitely you.”
Instead of being reassured by Dean’s words Cas just sighs resignated.
“It’s kind of you to refer to my inner beauty, but we both know this is not what you meant. You see Jimmy’s face and call it beautiful. I don’t begrudge you for this but don’t like being confused with him.”
Oh Cas definitely has insecurities. How can he even think Jimmy fucking Novak is anywhere near as attractive as Cas himself?
“No, I meant exactly what I said. You, the you you, are fucking hot.”
Cas’ frowns, unhappy with Dean’s reply.
“It’s okay. I understand. It’s hard to keep Jimmy’s body and I seperate. There’s no need for you to backtrack to make me feel better. Let’s just stop arguing about this.”
“Oh no Jon Snow. Not so fast. Let me put this in terms even you and your insecure ass will understand.”
Dean takes Cas’ face into his hands and stares deeply into his eyes. The staring is a habit from back when Cas was still fully juiced up. With the angel grace making it near impossible to look at Cas’ true form without feeling like his eyes were on fire, the vessel's eyes were the only place Dean’s own could safely escape to.
“Your true form is incredibly attractive. Very sexy. Wings and all. If I could hit that, I would. Inner beauty not required.” He speaks slowly as if to a child. Apparently it was the wrong thing to do as Cas slaps Dean’s hands away unable to suppress his irritation any longer.
“Dean, you’ve never seen my true form and I can assure you if you had, its inhuman nature would stop you from ‘hitting that’.”
Dean jumps up, strangely offended.
“Okay, first of all, you’ve seen my browser history. Your true form doesn’t even make my top 10 weirdest things I’ve jerked off to, so that’s a load of bull and second of all…”
Dean grows quiet. What does Cas mean with Dean’s never seen his true form before? Wasn’t the ability to see angels part of being the Michael Sword or something? How could Cas not know? And even if he didn’t, they’ve known each other for over ten years. It must’ve come up at some point.
Dean rifles through his memories desperate to find the right one, but draws a blank and visibly blanches.
Cas had no reason to believe Dean could see him. Back when they first met, Cas made some assumptions and Dean didn’t correct him, not trusting the self proclaimed angel an inch. And then it’s always been the vessel Dean’s been talking to, never the one puppeteering it. At first out simple necessity, then out of pure habit.
Determined to rectify their decade old misunderstanding Dean makes his way through the bedroom and sits down right in front of what Dean assumes must be the angel equivalent of Cas’ face or maybe his hand. Either way the body part has enough eyes to have an honest conversation with and has been observing Dean and the vessel talk this whole time.
This is Cas. The real Cas. And it’s high time for Dean to stop averting his eyes.
Cas squirms under his stare.
“Dean, childishly staring at an empty wall won’t solve this.” Cas argues from behind Dean and Dean has to suppress the urge to turn around. The voice might be coming from the vessel, but the one talking is the angel in front of him.
“That’s not what I’m doing.” Dean says, looking directly into one of Cas’ bigger eyes. Cas freezes momentarily at the direct eye contact and then his eyes swirl around frantically trying to find whatever it is that Dean’s looking at. Dean's stomach tightens. It hasn’t been fair to make Cas feel as if he’s invisible just because it’s easier for his stupid human brain to talk to the vessel.
Dean reaches out attempting to touch the nervously fluttering wing next to him, but as expected his hand moves right through it. He smiles sadly.
“I’m sorry, Cas. It seems there’s something I’ve neglected to tell you. I thought you knew, but that’s not an excuse.” Dean pauses. “I’ve always been able to see you.”
There’s a storm brewing inside Cas, a tension. One wrong move and a star could explode setting off a supernova that is held at bay by nothing but a shimmering skin made of light and colours. His husband is nervous at the possibility of being seen, Dean realises and has no choice but to confirm Cas’ worry.
“When you were still full of grace I couldn’t look directly at you without fearing for my eyes, so I got used to looking at your vessel instead, but I’ve always known and seen the real you.”
Ever since Dean could remember gigantic and intangible creatures taller than skyscrapers with wings that could pierce the heavens have been watching him from a distance, their countless eyes following his every move. Scary, yet unimaginably beautiful. As a child Dean would try to describe them and ask what they were, but apart from his mom there was never anyone trying to hear him out.
“Children and their imagination.” Adults would say and ruffle his hair whenever he tried to ask about them and by the time he was four he realised that he’s the only one who could see them.
Then his mom died and all his questions and curiosity were left behind in the ruins of their broken home. Dean learned quickly that John had no use for children and their imaginary friends. He needed to grow up and become a soldier for his family’s sake. So he followed the orders, and pretended not to see these watchers following him around.
Later, when Dean was a teen and John was gone most of the time, Sam often dragged him to libraries and Dean would do his own research on the creatures in secret, too scared to ask anyone for help. John made it pretty clear he didn’t want Dean talking about them and Dean feared that if he told someone and didn’t have proof of their existence Dean would be sent off to a mental ward for seeing things that were simply not there. In the end it took dying and coming back to life to find his answers.
Despite having seen these creatures all of his life, when they summoned the one named Castiel, Dean needed a moment to figure out what he was seeing. He’s never been this close to any of them and the proximity was overwhelming. Dean was suddenly acutely aware just how Pamela's eyes could've been burned out so easily by the creature's visage.
In an attempt not to suffer the same fate as her, Dean averted his eyes and spotted a man entering the barn, his body connected with small tendrils to the large creature around him. A puppet, Dean thought, one he could touch and subsequently kill, so without another moment's hesitation Dean took the first shot. And then the second, a third. Neither the puppet nor the creature were faced by his attempts to fight, merely curious. As if Dean was nothing more but an ant trying to fight a giant.
“I’m the one who gripped you tight and raised you from perdition.” The puppet finally said, inhuman in everything but his appearance and so Dean stabbed him as a thanks for the introduction. Next thing he knew, Bobby was down and the guy began claiming to be an angel.
“There’s no such thing.” Dean said, but the voice of his mother telling him that angels were watching over him thought differently.
The man’s body straightened and the creature, Castiel, stood up, his form ending far beyond the barn’s roof and he spread his wings. Bolts of lighting exploded into an array of mesmerizing fireworks and Dean was left breathless before the angel. His terrifying beauty nesting deep inside Dean’s heart and he knew he was lost.
“No, you must be lying.” Cas says as his body trembles under Dean’s stare.
“I’m not.” Dean replies, leaving no room for debate and moves closer to Cas, who seems to be trying to escape through the bedroom wall. “So believe me when I say that you’re fucking beautiful and only thinking about you watching me with your many many eyes is enough to make me hard.”
Cas sputters incoherently and his body changes colours rapidly, eventually settling on a pinkish sort of hue. Oh. That’s new. Dean grins.
“Cas, Huggybear, are you blushing?” Dean teases, taking immense amusement in this new discovery. Cas swirls him around in an attempt to make Dean look at his vessel again, but with a true form as big as Cas’ it’s not hard to find a new part of Cas’ body to focus his attention on.
“No.” Cas growls defensively. “Stop looking.”
“Make me.” The reply is a bit cliché but Dean isn’t trying to win an Oscar. He’d much rather film a porn instead.
In the blink of an eye Dean is encased possessively in Cas’s wings and pushed onto the bed with urgency. Fuck yes.
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My Review of Sarazanmai
How did I get into this anime? I heard “things” about this anime. 2019 was a weird time to be alive apparently. You know, before 2020 happened! As much shit as I give 2020, at least they didn’t give us kappas eating people’s asses.
Yes, I just said “kappas eating people’s asses”.
Be afraid. Be very afraid!
Kazuki Yasaka is a young boy who must carry around a box wherever he goes and follow specific directions day-by-day. Toi Kuji is a delinquent that breaks into cars and commits other crimes throughout the city. And Enta Jinnai is a childhood friend of Kazuki…He’s there too! These three boys have been chosen by the kappa prince, Keppi to help restore the Kappa Kingdom to its former glory. Kazuki, Toi, and Enta can now transform into kappas by being eaten ass first by Keppi and then shit out. Yes, I said eaten ass first and shit out by a kappa! These boys then must eat the inner-most desires of these kappa-zombies that are causing Keppi trouble. And these inner-most desires are located…in the ass. But there are those from the Otter Empire that cause this trouble for the kappas by turning folks into kappa zombies and causing havoc in the real world.
I would not expect any less of a mind-rape anime from the great Kunihiko Ikuhara.
BETWEEN THE SUB AND THE DUB: Even playing a kappa, Junichi Suwabe still finds a way to give me an erection.
Okay, let’s try that again and not make it sound disgusting, Medea.
Right! Let’s talk licensing. FUNimation is the licensors of this fine product. Seriously? Eating ass is fine, but you frown upon the likes of Interspecies Reviewers? Yes, there is a dub to this and believe it or not, I pretended it didn’t exist. Not because it was bad or anything! It’s just that this anime had the likes of Mamoru Miyano, Kouki Uchiyama, Rie Kugimiya, and Mr. Sex-in-a-Voice Junichi Suwabe. Let me state that my infatuation with Suwabe is like John Oliver’s infatuation with Adam Driver.
That…totally doesn’t help my case! Here’s what you might recognize these folks from.
JAPANESE CAST: *Kazuki is played by Ayumu Murase (known for Minami on Yuri on Ice, Luck on Black Clover, Asuto on Inazuma Eleven: Aries, Madoka on Shounen Maid, and Shinichi on SAO)
*Toi is played by Kouki Uchiyama (known for Yurio on Yuri on Ice, Soul on Soul Eater, Rui on Demon Slayer, Ikuya on Free!, Benedict on Violet Evergarden, Midnight on Fairy Tail, Yuu on Charlotte, and Ichijou on Nisekoi)
*Enta is played by Shun Horie (known for Kazuya on Rent-A-Girlfriend)
ENGLISH CAST: *Kazuki is played by Alejandro Saab (known for Leon on Pokemon Journeys, L’Arc on Shield Hero, Kuga on Food Wars, Yamazaki on Cardcaptor Sakura: Clear Card, and Takezou on Kono Oto Tomare)
*Toi is played by Ricco Fajardo (known for Koutaro on Zombieland Saga, Itona on Assassination Classroom, Karim on Fire Force, Natsuya on Free!, and Kyousuke on Danganronpa 3)
*Enta is played by Justin Briner (known for Deku on My Hero Academia, Yukito on Cardcaptor Sakura: Clear Card, Shou on Fire Force, Luck on Black Clover, and Ryouta on Danganronpa 3)
SHIPPING: Well…we got our BL kiss by the third episode. That’s quite early for an Ikuhara anime. Ooh boy, Enta loves him some Kazuki. He REALLY loves Kazuki! There’s a lot to be said of a boy that would sniff and fondle items owned by his lover and kiss his unconscious lover. I can understand why Enta would care for Kazuki. I mean after hearing that he’s truly his first friend after a childhood of traveling around and not making many friends, you want to feel for this kid. Key word here is “want”. But this boy goes too far sometimes and his jealousy does get the best of him to a point where I’m just saying, cut ties with the megane brat. But Enta ends up screwing things up again by taking a bullet for Kazuki and throwing all that anger out the window.
And then we have Reo and Mabu! God damn Reo! We’ve got shark teeth, an arrogant attitude, homosexuality, and the voice of Mamoru Miyano. This is just a Rin Matsuoka of a different color! If Reo and Mabu’s otter dance isn’t a dead giveaway, they totally love each other. To a point where they would sacrifice each other for the one they love.
POLE-DANCE ALERT: I don’t know why I always find random pole-dancing moments in animes so alluring. I guess I can blame the likes of Grell from Black Butler. But this moment was so random that it came right the fuck out of nowhere. Then again, this entire anime is an enigmatic brain-fart that it was only a matter of time before a kappa prince starts randomly dancing on a pole.
There we go, Medea’s love for random crap will never die!
ENDING: Throughout the series, Kazuki, Toi, and Enta were gathering these dishes in order to get a wish granted by Keppi. And each time they’ve gone up against a big bad otter, Reo and Mabu are usually the ones to bring out the kappa zombies. But everyone has a plan for using the dishes of hope for their own wishes. Enta wants to use it to stay with Kazuki so the two can remain the golden duo. Reo and Mabu want the dishes to be with each other and save one another after an incident nearly killed them. And Kazuki originally wanted to use the dishes for his baby brother’s own sake, but changes to wanting to help Toi (who ends up leaving with his older, criminal of a brother). And shit goes crazier than what I’ve just mentioned. Enta fucks up by stealing the collected dishes and really fucking up his relationship with Kazuki! Toi ends up leaving town with his criminal brother.
Reo and Mabu, the otter cops shoot Kazuki, but Enta takes the bullet and is hours away from dying. But then we learn that Reo and Mabu were actually kappas who worked under Keppi. It’s just that the otters have been manipulating these two. Mabu is just a hollow body created by the otters because of some accident that happened prior to the events in the anime. The otter gives Mabu a mechanical heart to keep him alive, but in order to stay alive, he cannot say he loves Reo. Unfortunately for these two, Mabu ends up saying he loves Reo and dies right in front of him and vanishing from his memories. Reo is then shot by Toi who comes in at the last minute.
Toi’s back. We all knew it wasn’t going to last. His older brother got shot dead the episode before. So Toi is going to use the dishes to resurrect his brother from the dead. This leaves Kazuki in shambles as he was going to use it on Enta before his body expires in like 10 seconds. In the last minute, Kazuki used the dishes on Enta and he’s going to live. End of story right? No, we still have a demented otter on the loose. And the otters have a dark Keppi that he’s been storing for just this sort of moment. And now it grabs Toi and Toi accepts. He wants to erase his existence from Enta and Kazuki’s lives. Problem is if he does that, Toi erases giving Kazuki the ankle bracelet that’s been a staple in Kazuki and Enta’s relationship when it comes to soccer. But the boys were able to connect, destroy the otters, bring the memories of Mabu and Reo back, turn Keppi into a kappa prince, and save the town from OTTER-destruction.
Yeah, if you watch this series, you’ll hear a lot of puns involving otters. I mean when you’re not smothered in sexualized otters and kappas.
The ending credits show Toi getting sent to juvie for three years. And it’s quite sad to see his dejected face while the ending song blasts. When the lyrics literally say “stand by me” it gets quite sad. Three years pass and Toi’s out of juvie. He goes to the bridge and jumps off. Keep in mind this is an Ikuhara anime, Toi’s not gonna die. Enta and Kazuki jump in and join Toi and welcome him back to society.
Good lord Ikuhara-san! I didn’t think you could out-gay an anime after the likes of Yuri Kuma Arashi. But good fuck, you found a way! This anime was…INSANITY. Pure insanity! Then again, this is the same director that did Revolutionary Girl Utena, Yuri Kuma Arashi, and Mawaru Penguindrum. Yes, connection and desires are a big take in not only Sarazanmai, but a lot of the other animes Ikuhara does. It’s just that Sarazanmai is the strangest acid-trip of them all. And that’s saying a lot because Yuri Kuma Arashi has sexy bears that say “Shaba-da-doo”. ALSO VOICED BY JUNICHI SUWABE! But people getting turned into kappas by being eaten ass first by another kappa and stealing spirits inner most desires, conveniently stored in their asses is some wonky-ass crack-fest. Recommendation wise, I would say watch some of the other animes Ikuhara has directed to get your feet wet in what you might expect in this kind of anime. After that, pop in a few Bakemonogatari episodes just for good measure. And after you do all that, take some CBD gummies and let-a-rip with Sarazanmai.
If you want to watch Sarazanmai, Crunchyroll and FUNimation have it available for streaming.
Okay, what’s next for my FUNimation list?
Okay, boobs! What are we talking here? Are these boobs flat as an ironing board or crimes against nature like in Eiken?
Oh, this can’t end well.
#sarazanmai#anime review#enta jinnai#keppi#junichi suwabe#toi kuji#kazuki yasaka#reo niiboshi#mabu akutsu
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