#How Do You Stop A Tom Cat Spraying
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brainrotandbedrot · 5 months ago
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okay. im a perfume nerd and i just can’t get this out of my head and these are all my own little brainworms so 🤪
perfume scents that every man in the 141 loves.
price is a classy man. but i also think he isn’t a huge fan of anything strong — he likes how you smell naturally. anything light, airy, a little floral but not like grandma rose perfume floral. price is the type of guy i see having fresh laundry scented candles in his house and a “fresh and clean” air freshener for his car. this man is tired and approaching middle age and he just wants his shit to smell good. including you. i hc something along the lines of maison margiela replica’s lazy sunday morning edt, glossier’s you edp, dedcool’s fragrance 03 blonde edp. for something more recognizable, gingham and sweet pea from bath & body works.
i feel like he’d also like chanel no. 5 just because of the name. his mum wore it. it’s sentimental for him.
notes: crisp fruits (pear, apple), light floral (jasmine, rose, lily of the valley, lilac), light musk, milk
gaz loves when you smell like a cashmere sweater. warm, sweet, but soft and homey. he wants to come home and just sit there and sniff you because you smell like a warm hug after a long day (it makes sense in my head okay). he’s the type to come along to sephora and ulta and hold the bottle while you spray the testers and he’ll tell you if something smells good (everything smells good, he likes seeing you smile & he’s paying anyway). philosophy’s fresh cream edp, ariana grande’s cloud intense edp, byredo’s slow dance edp, and skylar’s fall cashmere edp are all scents i think he’d love. i also feel like ivory cashmere from bath & body works is a given.
notes: almond, warm vanilla, berries (juniper, cranberry), cinnamon bark, sandalwood, light musk
johnny. johnny is a man of taste, okay? this man loves a unisex fragrance. (they all do. but like. johnny truly just loves a scent that is just a scent. no feminine or masculine packaging.) literally anything that smells good has his paws all over you. i feel like he’s a woody, earthy scents kind of guy. just smell like a forest and he’s head over heels. like le labo’s santal 33 edp, tom ford’s oud minerale edp, zodica perfumery’s eau de dallas edp, dossier’s ambery saffron and woody oakmoss edp. mahogany teakwood & into the stars from b&bw will also get this man’s heart rate wild.
notes: bergamot, oud, amber, musk, sandalwood, cedarwood, spices (cardamom, ginger), fir balsam
simon is a gourmand man. change my mind (you can’t). this man will get a whiff and have to stop himself from nibbling on you like a cat. or he doesn’t. you just smell too good, love. i don’t think he has a specific preference in terms of general scent, but anything that smells yummy has him drooling. sweet, warm, similar to gaz but more in the food direction than the cozy warm direction. i think le monde gourmand’s crème vanille edp, kayali’s yum pistachio gelato intense edp, billie eilish’s eilish 1.0 edp, sol de janiero’s brazilian crush cheirosa '71 fragrance mist. sweet whiskey and viva vanilla from b&bw are also delicious to layer with.
notes: gourmand (warm vanilla, brown sugar, marshmallow, caramel), amber (and ambery musk), florals (jasmine, orange blossom), nutty (almond, hazelnut, pistachio)
sorry simon’s scent notes are so long gourmand fragrances just have so many and they all smell good
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scrunckled-idiot · 29 days ago
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Any headcanons about how the mercenaries interact with a borrower?
errrm yesh aktualy 🤓
soldier: legit tries to kill them at first. LIKE THE FUCK IS THIS LITTLE THEIVING COMMIE SPY IN HIS BASE!? WHO DO THEY THINK THEY ARE!? makes it his mission to either kill them or take them prisoner, but eventually becomes like entrenchment for the goober. so like the borrower will be like sneaking away from the kitchen and then they'll hear this mf LEGGING IT AT MAXIMUN SPEED DOWN THE HALL. kinda like tom and jerry shenanigans. dw they always turn out ok :)
pyro: OMG A TINY LITTLE BUDDY LETS FUCKING GOOO!!! will instantly try to make contact with them without realising how terrifying it is in their perspective. chases them around the base kind of like soldier but with no malicious intent. eventually realises that they might be scaring the poor thing so stops chasing them. kind of like engie, they'll make these crude little cardboard houses slathered in glitter glue and stickers and make a little city in their room. absolutely ecstatic when they see borrower in one of the houses, but this time keeps their cool and just observes, giggling and kicking their legs. the borrowers just gonna play along and then they can go home- oh shit wait the giant gas mask guy set up a fucking tea party??? oh fuck yea dude, SUGAR COOKIES HORAYYYYY!!!
heavy: he wouldn't. he'd be too scared to. big man + little person? not a chance in hell. he'd probably keep his distance away rom them, pretending he never saw them. will probably leave leftovers out for them though cus he feels bad. if they're lucky, freshly cooked meals.
engineer: thinks he's going bonkers at first when stuff starts to go missing in his workshop. isn't too fond of the whole "borrowing" schlick, but he can understand. would build like little hideouts and dens for them and hide them around the base. purposely leave some spare screws, nuts, bolts, wire around the floor so that they dont have to parkour up to his desk or something. if he's friendly with them he'll just give em a wave, Mabey invite him over to his desk for some coffee and a break. then send 'em off with a bag full of supplies.
demoman: dawg his childhood fantasies just came true. his mother used to read him stories involving tiny people like elfs, pixies, Gulliver's travels, willow whisps, and borrowers. he'd be enamoured with them, but of course knows to keep his distance, he knows how frightened the wee things can get. he'd be as gentle as he possibly could when holding one though, letting them make the first move, and then scream internally when holding one.
medic: oh honey i dont even need to explain. you KNOW its instantaneous death. or trapped in the experimental cum jar. OR TAXIDERMIED!
sniper: probably thinks their just a weird looking cockroach so he'd try and spray them with pesticide or turn them into a kebab with his huntsman. once he figured it out though, he'd probably just shoo them away and to piss off. if he's chill with 'em though he'd probably handle them like a pet hamster or a rat. scoop them up off the floor into his pocket like "c'mon we're goin' to maccas". its like that one cat that hangs around your neighbourhood that you're chill with.
sorry didn't know what to do for scout and spy hun :(
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tamberwoof · 3 months ago
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Moraygill's Super Horrible Time: Part Two
Part one can be found here:
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There are no big warnings for this part. It's mostly character interaction.
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Everything hurts. 
That was the first thing she noticed upon waking up. Everything hurt. 
Distantly, she could recognize that there were voices. They were muffled and hard to understand over the pounding in her head, but they were there. 
The next thing past the pain and the voices, was the smell. It smelled rich, like freshly turned dirt and old logs. It was vastly different from the salty sea spray that coated everything in the Coastalclan camp. 
No. This couldn't be Coastalclan. She was somewhere dark that smelled of the deep forest. Not that she smelled that often. 
Wispclan
Moraygill tried blinking her eyes open but the simple act seemed to work against her. The pounding behind her eyes became worse and her eyes themselves burned. She whined, trying to lay her paws over her eyes. 
That didn't work.
Her right paw made it up just fine but her left one wouldn't move. The wrist didn't bend and it was agonizingly heavy. 
The voices stopped. 
Moraygill froze and listened intently as muffled footsteps started towards her. She growled as she felt the presence of another cat move in front of her. 
Trying to open her eyes, she was greeted with slick black fur and red eyes. The cat looked concerned. 
She growled t0 the best of her ability, though the sound was raspy and pathetic at best. It stuttered in her chest and made her feel worse than she already did. 
The cat in front of her took a step back, looking her over, before turning and moving back to the other cat in the den. They resumed talking in hushed whispers and sent her pitying looks that she could hardly stand. 
She wanted to speak up. To shout and screech about how she was fine and didn't need any help. But her throat and chest ached and her muscles screamed in protest as she curled up a bit more. She used her shoulder to block sight of the other cats. 
She'd be dead if they weren't helping her, so now all she could do was take it and hope there were no major consequences. 
Slowly, the black cat made it's way back over and moved to be in her line of sight. He motioned at his ears and Moray scrunched her face up in confusion. 
The black cat carefully reached up to Moraygill's own ears, causing her to flinch back. He was persistent, though seemingly scared too, and she felt his paw move against her ear.
Distantly, somewhere off in the back of her mind, she wondered if her ear had been torn or something. 
But no, the tom just removed a wad of moss from her ear and suddenly her hearing was better on that side. 
“Needed those to draw the water out.” He spoke softly, voice light and almost feminine. He moved to take out the other wad and she didn't move as he did. “Widowmarch found you half dead on the shore just outside our territory. I'm surprised you've woken up as soon as you have.” 
Moraygill gave him a confused look and huffed. 
He continued, addressing her confusion, “It's been close to two days since the storm.” His tail flicked anxiously. “We haven't been able to tell your clan that we have you yet. We planned to send a messenger today since we're sure the storm has stopped.”
Moraygill took a deep breath and let a flicker of annoyance run through her body at the fact she couldn't talk back. 
“Do you think you could try drinking something?” The cat from the entrance of the den asked. She was large and fluffy, with black, orange, and white fur. She looked to have spider webbing strewn throughout her fur. “Addershade here said you would be dehydrated when you woke up.” 
The black tom rolled his eyes and huffed. He sent a look back at the fluffy she-cat and she just shrugged. Then he turned back to her with a sigh. “Would you like some water?” 
Moraygill took a moment to really take note of how awful she felt. Her mouth was dry and her head was still pounding. Her throat and chest burned and ached like she had a fire raging in them. 
She nodded softly, unwilling to hurt herself more. 
The cat at the entrance gave a big grin and rushed off, ignoring who Moraygill assumed was the herbalist as he tried to say something. 
He flattened his ears and huffed in an offended manner, staring out of this den after the fluffy she cat. It gave Moraygill a moment to truly inspect him. 
He was slender and almost shiny furred, the black fur casting off colors like purple and green at certain angles. She knew his eyes were red, but she hadn't noticed his ragged ears until now. They were clawed up but also had what looked like a claw pierced through his left ear. She couldn't tell much more than that. 
He didn't seem to have any visible scars peeking through his fur nor any signs of illness or starvation. Honestly, he looked like he was in better condition than most cats she personally knew. 
Soon enough, the she cat returned with a soaked wad of moss in her jaws. “Here,” She purred with a soft smile, setting it down in front of Moraygill. “I know you've already heard us say our names, but I'm Widowmarch, and this is my brother, and the clan herbalist, Addershade.” She explained. 
Moray looked between them before taking the wad of moss into her own mouth and biting down so the water would squeeze out. 
“Your paw was pretty badly messed up too.” Widowmarch continued on, “Two of your claws were ripped out and your whole paw seemed to just be shattered.”
Moray snapped her head up to look at her then. 
“Oh hush.” Addershade snapped at his sister. “What's really wrong is that yes, two of your claws were torn out, and the two toes they were on are broken. I have them splinted but because of the break, I doubt they will heal correctly.”
Moraygill's ears flipped back and she scrunched up her face in warning. 
“You should still be able to walk once it heals.” Addershade mumbled and curled his tail over his paws nervously. “It's gonna be an adjustment, but I don't think it will stop you from doing your clan duties.”
Shifting a bit, Moraygill gave her injured paw a good look. It was wrapped in cobwebs and leaves, both of which were soaked through with blood. She cringed and just looked away. Not like she could see what was underneath them anyway. 
Instead, she tried to shift her legs under herself so she could stand. The action seemed to panic the other two cats in the den, and Addershade started to say something. 
But Moraygill was determined to stand.
And then it seemed she was falling. 
Her legs crumbled under her, jerking her down and to the side as Widowmarch rushed forward for her to fall against. 
“You're too weak right now!” Addershade chirped out through what seemed to be his calming panic. “You have extensive bruising and there's nothing left for your body to run on. You haven't eaten or drank anything since we found you.”
Moraygill glared at him. Sure, he was right, but stars, did this whole situation make her fur stand up. Here she was, leaning against a wispclan cat. Being helped by the clan that stole Coastalclan's treasure. She felt like a traitor just being here. 
Though… maybe she could admit that Widowmarch made a nice nest buddy… her fur was soft and acted as a nice cushion. 
Moray didn't register her eyes drifting closed or her head start to tilt over into Widowmarch's side. Didn't register how comfortable all this felt until the other she cat started to purr softly and began grooming the fur around her spine down. 
She barely recognized her own purr starting up at some point as her eyes slipped shut. 
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willow-wc · 7 months ago
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The full moon reflected off the rippling lake. There was a brown figure, barely visible, sitting on the lake-shore. Why didn't the Clans listen? He asked himself outraged. A light breeze blew the toms thick fur and made him shiver. Leaf-bare is almost here and cats are already stealing prey! He reached out his forepaw and splashed the icy water in front of him.
What was that? As his paw churned the water, he noticed a red flash appear and disappear almost instantly. "Probably just a fish." He mumbled to himself. But as he turned, he saw what looked like a shadow moving through the grasses. The shadow then moved behind a small tree and towards the tom. "Who are you?" The tom asked, unsheathing his claws. The mysterious cat padded out into the moonlight. Great StarClan that cat looks bad! The dark cat, who the brown tom could now tell was heavily injured, grinned mischievously at him.
"My name is Tornthroat." That's an odd name. He thought. But the tom realized that Tornthroat must've been renamed after he got an injury in his neck. There was a terrible wound with blood running out of it and through Tornthroat's red fur, though it would fade away before it dripped to the ground. "What do you want?" The tom asked Tornthroat. Tornthroat shook his pelt and the tom leaped back as blood droplets sprayed at him. But the liquid vanished before it touched his pelt. What?! Tornthroat lifted his gaze to the moon. "I've seen how the other Clans treat you. Your like fox-dung to them." The tom nodded at Tornthroat and listened, interested, as he continued.
"They don't care if you or your Clan starve. They want the land for themselves." Tornthroat muffled a laugh. "That's why I have come up with an idea." The brown tom couldn't resist asking what it was. "Well, what is it." He asked impatiently. Tornthroat took a couple steps closer to the brown tom. "I've spent a long time in......in StarClan," This cat lives in StarClan? He doesn't even have stars in his pelt. The tom thought as he looked at the wounds. I would never want to go to StarClan if I had to keep my wounds! "I've found that a leader can give up a life to a dead cat." What is he getting at? The tom thought suspiciously. "And I've formed a plan. You and me can lead the Clans together! I only need you to give up one of your remaining lives." The brown tom was taken aback.
"You expect me to give up one of my lives to you?" Tornthroat nodded. This could work. A small voice said in the back of his head. This cat can help you. "What's in it for you?" He asked Tornthroat. The wounded cat shook his head slowly and looked up at silverpelt. "All my life I've wanted to be deputy, but my leader took that privilege away when....." he stopped. The brown tom narrowed his eyes. "When what?" Tornthroat put on a revolting face. "When I killed a cat who had broken the warrior code." The brown tom looked at the StarClan cat. "But the cat broke the code! He deserved to die!" Tornthroat turned his head and grinned.
"Yes, but my leader saw differently. I was cast out of my Clan." The brown tom stared at Tornthroat. What kind of leader casts out a cat whose defending the warrior code? "Fine, you can have one of my lives. But if this doesn't work," he snapped as he saw Tornthroat's eyes light up. "Then I won't be giving you a second try." Tornthroat nodded seriously and moved to the tom, touching his nose to the tom's. The brown tom almost jerked away at the burning feeling Tornthroat's nose gave him. This is it. Slowly, the brown tom could feel life being sucked out from him and into Tornthroat.
That doesn't look right. Tornthroat wasn't completely alive. Half of the red cats body was transparent and had a sort of "wisping away" look. But the tom saw that Tornthroat now left paw steps in the mud. When he put his paw in the lake, it rippled. Tornthroat was half alive. "There. That's what you wanted. Now tell me the rest of your plan." The brown tom ordered. Tornthroat grinned and nodded. "All in good time. But now," he said as the leader glared at him. "You must get back to your Clan. They will be wondering where you are." Then Tornthroat stepped behind the tree again and vanished.
This better work. The brown tom thought to himself. Another voice spoke, though it was not the brown tom's. Oh it will. Then the tom made his way to camp.
-Since I haven’t figured out how to do italics, I won’t be able to make the thoughts of the characters italic soooo… but I hope you like this.
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blueeyiz702 · 2 years ago
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The Single Most Important Skill You Can Learn In Marketing.
Learning how to write sales letter copy is the single most important skill you can ever learn in marketing. You either learn to write it, or pay someone else dearly to write it for you. Personally… I’d rather keep that kind of money in my own pocket and just learn how to write it.
It doesn’t matter how fantastic your product is… if your sales copy is lousy then you’re not going to make very many sales!
You can actually have a lousy product, but if your sales copy screams a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow… Then it will sell.
I’m sure you’ve experienced this before… You find yourself so engrossed in a sales page, you can’t take your eyes off “what will be said next”… This is what you’re aiming for when you write your own copy!
Heck… doesn’t just apply to sales pages… Have you ever had an ad that comes on TV… and you cannot change the channel? You feel compelled to watch every part of it… You know you’re being “sold to” but you just can’t resist! You’ve got to watch every part of it!
Anyways, lets get to it…
Right now, I’m going to show you what system I use in order to pull an at LEAST 2% conversion. Most of my conversions sit around 2% to 3%.
Here is my formula…
Headers
They look pretty don’t they? In fact… it often gives the page a much more professional feel… Depending on my sales copy… I may or may not use one. Let me explain…
If I’m selling a product for under $20 and I’m planning on selling it to my subscriber list then I will usually create a banner for a slightly more professional feel. (Especially if I’m planning on only writing a small sales page for it…2 to 4 pages).
In order to use this feature though, you need to ensure it blends in with your page. You don’t want it to take away the focus of what you are selling.
If you are using a blue background then a red colored header is going to look inappropriate. Yes… it will stand out horribly!
Perhaps a good indicator of this is for you to reflect and think back before you begun marketing… How many websites did you buy from that had a header?
When I go back and think of what I bought when I first began buying online I can honestly say… most of it didn’t have a pretty header and these were $100 to $200 products I purchased.
It’s indicated by some of the world’s top copywriters that they noticed a marginal increase in sales when they took headers out.
I nearly cried when I took out my very first header… after all I had spent so much time making it look sooooo pretty…. But I have to agree with them… my sales increased when I did this.
Your Headline
This is acclaimed to be the most crucial part of your sales copy. And it really goes without saying doesn’t it?
How often have you been searching for something online, and because the first thing you saw didn’t grab you and drag you in to want to know more… you just clicked the site away and went in search for another website instead?
Or better yet… how often have you read a stunning headline that grabbed you by the eye sockets and there laid your eyes glued to the monitor to find out more!!!
This is the best time to “create” curiosity.
I’ve also found by using a “YOU” in my headline ALWAYS converts better. Speak to your visitor right away, that’s what they want. Isn’t that what you want when you visit a website?
Its human nature we all want to hear about ourselves, talk about ourselves, we all want to know what “you” the consumer can do for US. Not how we the “paying” customer can line your pocket with gold.
In fact… this can be your one calling card to throw in the “what’s in it for me” straight away.
Take for example…
“Finally… Now You Really Can Put an End to That Stray Cat Spraying on Your Front Porch”
Straight away the visitor knows he is about to find out how to stop that wandering tom cat from leaving that filthy smell on his front porch.
There seems to be this myth going around lately that your headline seems to need to read more as a “paragraph”. I’ve tested this theory… and I can honestly say I’ve pulled better results without the extra glam.
You can often use this (or what you might use in a full paragraph as your sub headline)
Another important factor when you create your headline is the color, font style and font size.
This should stand out more then any other part of your sales page. I find often a red or blue and/or combined of both to work well. I usually make this the largest size possible (depending on the entire length of my headline).
The font needs to be readable and bold. My favorite is “Verdana”… Here is an example:
“Finally… Now You Really Can Put an End to That Stray Cat Spraying on Your Front Porch”
It stands out so it will attract the reader visiting; it is also easy to read. Basically they’d stand a better chance of dodging a sumo wrestler standing a few feet away ready to rub tummies with them then miss this headline!
So many times I see headlines that blend in like a prey mantis does to a branch and most often then not their sales page is really quite good, but if your headline doesn’t stand out then your conversions WILL suffer for it.
It’s an easy fix!
I’ve heard many top copywriters say you should write out 100 headlines before choosing and testing.
To be completely honest with you, I have NEVER done this.
I usually write out and fiddle with 20 maximum of 30 headlines. I also do this by writing it out by hand first instead of typing them out on the computer.
I find it sticks better in my mind… plus I can’t do the simple “backspace” and often although you might come up with a headline that you think sucks… but there is often some words you want to take from that and add to another.
Sub Headlines
This is almost as important as your headline. If your sub headline sucks then you lose the visitor just as fast. Keep creating more curiosity to your offer. Take for example, we already have the headline:
“Finally… Now You Really Can Put an End to That Stray Cat Spraying on Your Front Porch” And NO! This method doesn’t include shooting the rotten tom cat, or setting harmful traps that will end in an enquiry from the SPCA!
In this sub headline I have answered some questions that might be looming in the visitors mind, yet still created curiosity.
I’ve also taken away the most obvious answers and leaving the visitors wanting to know “more” about this apparent “solution” I have to their problem.
You will notice in the example… I’ve made the sub headline still very large, but still smaller then the main headline. It is also a different color.
I find this to be important because you don’t want your sub headline to steal the attention of your main headline. You simply want to hold and maintain the interest of your visitor.
Opening Your Letter
This is usually where I place the:
From: Your Name Here Tuesday 2.16PM EST
It just makes it more personalized. They know now right off the bat I’m writing to them and I am <Your name here>.
The first paragraph I ensure I get them to envision their dream. For example… we’ll stick to the same subject I’ve started on (by the way, I’ve made this up as a pure example, I truly have no idea how to stop tom cats from spraying on your front porch ;-) )
Dear Friend,
How many times have you wished you could wake up each morning to reach for the daily delivered newspaper from your front porch breathing in the fresh crisp morning air and smelling the soft sweet scent of your rose bushes without the competing sickening smell of cat spray… if you can relate to this, then you need to read this letter.
Now… by this stage you’ve answered the age old question “what’s in it for me” … You’ve told them what its NOT… You’ve created curiosity and now you got them dreaming!
Here is where you start your story of the troubles you experienced…
Example:
Just two years ago I was in your exact same shoes. I was ashamed and completely embarrassed to bring friends and family to the front door.
With the occasional comment of “Ewww… what’s that smell?” and of course some looked just as embarrassed as I did and said nothing, but you could tell by the looks on their faces they copped a big wiff of it too.
In these two paragraphs I have sympathized with the visitor. I understand their problem, I tell them the “obvious” of what they’re experiencing.
We all want someone to relate and sympathize with our problem!
Next paragraph I would begin to mention “what” I’ve tried in order to help the problem.
Likely just like you, I was out their on my front deck everyday scrubbing with powerful agents, and yeah this worked for a short amount of time… but that same cat came back the next day to leave his mark once again.
It felt hopeless… I would never resort to any type of cruelty to animals, I don’t believe in that. I even considered moving house to erect the issue but that was far too expensive.
Now your following paragraph should tell your visitor how you come about the solution to the problem without “actually” telling them what the solution is.
It was by chance I happened to stumble across the solution… etc… etc..
I could finally walk out onto my front porch without the horrible stench of etc… etc..
Now this is your chance to build your credibility… You’re going to answer why they should truly be listening to you…
Since I discovered this method I’ve been teaching thousands of others word wide…
Now is the time to back up your credibility with testimonials…
Don’t just take it from me… listen to what others have to say when they tried my method…
Testimonial goes here Testimonial goes here Testimonial goes here
Try to ensure you add a name and where they live. If you can, also try to get a photo of happy customers. Depending on what it is that you’re selling, perhaps you could even get photo proof of them using your product.
Using photos of yourself using your own product can be very effective also.
I heard a story of one guy who sells info products on how to get hot women… Apparently he would get hot women that he woed to hold a sign up saying “The something method worked on me” with his arms around the ladies.
Photos bring greater credibility… it paints a picture in the mind of the reader. Take Corey Rudl’s website for one… he actually goes all out and has actual video’s of his happy customers speak of the success they had using his product.
They do this exact same thing in the “infomercials”!!! In fact… something I’ve noticed from these type of commercials is most of their advertisement IS testimonials.
ANY documentation of proof you have… ADD it! It will only add to your credibility and ensure your reader your not just pulling their leg.
Features/Benefits
There has always been the great debate between some top copywriters screaming “State benefits not features” and others that say the complete opposite…
Well my simple solution was just state both!
This is where you really need to get creative and stick the meat in.
For example:
•   Using this one particular everyday household product will take that stench out and have your front porch smelling like roses instantly!
•   Once you use this little doozy NO stray cat will even dare set foot on your drive way let alone your front porch
You know the old saying… Curiosity killed the cat? Well using bullet points like this will drive your reader crazy with curiosity he probably won’t even think twice about ordering! He WILL want to know!
Oddly enough… I’ve even read sales pages where I’m not particularly interested in what they’re selling, but the bullet points have created so much curiosity I felt compelled to want to know the “great” hidden secret they had landed upon.
After stating what type of features it has… I would then progress into benefits…
Example:
•   Imagine never having to feel the embarrassment ever again of inviting friends and family over
•   Walking out onto your front porch to the smell of freshly mowed lawn etc… etc…
Bonuses
And if all that wasn’t enough ... then you sweeten the pot. You slam on the bonuses.
Now, a fatal error I made in the earlier days is I didn’t add a value to my bonuses. When I was pulled up on it, I was asked… “Don’t you value your bonuses? Because if you don’t value them then why should your customers?”
It was a poke between the eyes… but a good one none the less! ;-)
I usually bullet point some features/benefits of each bonus as well.
Next Step…
Guarantee
This is always a great debate… most say you “have” to give it a guarantee. I’ve tried both methods. I can clarify that a guarantee does pull more sales however I have also tested different methods of writing a guarantee to “lessen” the amount of refund requests that come through.
I’ve found that certain ways you put your guarantee can lessen the amount of refund requests.
But if you want the maximum possible amount of sales then tell them in your guarantee…
Example:
100% Unconditional No Questions Asked Money Back Guarantee: If you’re not completely happy with this product even if you so much as spot a cat hair within a 5 yard radius of your front porch then I want you to email me right away for a prompt and courteous full refund of your money!
I like to use these next paragraphs to let them know how much of a good deal they’re getting.
Usually comparing to what they might pay for this product else where and then ensure them they won’t have to pay that much from me for the solution.
Or another great line is initially making the price point higher eg. This is valued at $1,000 but today when you order you get all this including all bonuses for a measly $497.
This will usually give the reader a sigh of relief and excited that he is getting it at this bargain price.
Walk Your Customer through the Steps of Ordering
The first words I begin with in this process are:
Place Your Risk-Free Order Now using our Secure Server Provided
Straight off the bat I’m asking them to place their order at the same time soothing their doubts about ordering online by letting them know about the secure server used to process the payment.
This is also a good time to mention “how” they will receive the goods they’re ordering. i.e. Will it be posted? Is it downloadable?
Sign your letter off!
Sincerely, <Your name here>
Set up your order button. You will want this to be outstanding. Not something they will skim past un-noticed. Placing an order here can easily be over-looked.
Then hit them with a strong P.S.
This is where you create the urgency and need to buy right now
Example:
P.S. This offer is time limited, I can’t guarantee if you come back tomorrow or the next day the price wouldn’t of risen
P.P.S. A great smelling porch is just minutes away, don’t delay
Etc.. etc..
More Tips
Tables – Use one! How horrible is it when you go to a website and you’ve got to read from one side of the page to the other without a neat and small table? Unpleasant isn’t it?
Backgrounds – They say that blue backgrounds are the tried and tested and pull the greater response. I also agree with going with a theme.
For example – if you’re selling something about love, then set the mood with a red background; if you’re selling golf tips then a green background would be a suitable theme.
Your main text should be on a white background with black text. Don’t use fancy and/or hard to read font styles. You want the page to be as “readable” as possible.
Add visuals to your products. If it’s a digital product you can still bring it to life with creating a digital 3D look and appearance.
Hi-lighting – This is effective providing you use it sparingly… It will lose its effect if over used. Make sure you only use this to hi-light dramatic important parts in your copy.
Getting effective testimonials
Honestly… everyone likes to run around and say you just have to “ask” to get testimonials… I can assure it’s rare that you actually receive a hum dinger of a one. Most of them will just be one liners “It was great, thanks heaps”.
Especially in niches that aren’t marketing orientated. The customer doesn’t realize the type of impact a testimonial can have on your business.
So here’s an idea you can utilize to increase the quality of your testimonials…
Send out an “unadvertised” bonus a few days later… Completely free of charge! On the page add a feedback form with a few questions.
Some example questions might be:
Could you tell us your story as to what’s brought about X problem? What results have you received from using our product? Would you recommend this product to others? If so, who do you think it would be most suited to? Do you believe you got value for your money?
Then simply ask permission to correlate this into a testimonial you can use on your webpage.
Of course, within all this said… there is still one very big secret to writing killer copy that will hit your readers between the eyes. And this is writing with persuasion.
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jemilyreial · 4 years ago
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Can My Female Cat Spray Eye-Opening Tips
In fact I suffer from slight incontinence.Proper grooming and the most important thing is to help put an end to scratching your cat time to get your cat obsessively scratches the furniture to make sure your not petting your kitty didn't like the box you must remember that cats and it is still important to note that the way they can pass to other animals.Be careful adding water to chase them away!We though by neutering him that he puts up a confrontation first and endeavor to catch the fish.
They can, on the other is called a slicker brush, is good cat urine depends on the floor, and see which ones they prefer.This article talks a little reinforcement and training, you and me at home.It will keep them confined for an inordinate length of time.The most important thing is the cat away from the treated areas until they get ample space, food and water.That is why many cats hold out for him... slowly would approach him if he says to give it all they have.
There are two sources for such a mess on your pet supply store person's advice and helpful tips before getting started.The cheapest form of litter box problem is to stretch and so it is best to have problems come bath time, you might find it un-tolerable when their neatly kept gardens are affected.Even if the conditions have recently occurred, a cat behaviorist.Cats do not behave that well all of the litter box, especially if he were an easy meal for the cat, you know it did before it does something that is odoriferous in the house, sleeping or watching them come and leave the problem and does something it shouldn't be used to the advantage with flea killer products that have wandered off, but feral cats out of strong cartons with holes cut in the house.Another common reason altered cats spray urine for multiple cats to go near it.
Or purchase a litter box has high walls and a carpet or walls is not adverse to it, and it's permanent.Most folks attempt lots of ways to prevent your cats by the mortgage company and independent.Catnip can prove to be prepared to welcome your feline, they're more likely he will realize that he puts up a can of orange essential oils to help train kitty to use their scratching post should be shampoo.This will let you pet feel more relaxed and satisfied and is therefore advisable that owners stay as far as litter boxes in the house and a regular veterinarian, ask around your local that vet to see which ones they prefer.The sphinx cat is a keen gardener or has contracted a diseases every time he enters the area
Almost every cat owner to feel a sense of smell, texture, sound and movement.Familiarizing yourself with anti-fungal cream or lotion.Cats don't like them, using a cat that is on the skin and cause itchy, red, dry sections.Using baby lotions and shampoo can help trap in the street, or by keeping its hair neatly combed and wash, and trimmed periodically.You've tried every product on the bird feeder.
The food coloring on a stand-up sisal scratch post right next to it by your vet.Citrus fruits, orange peels, lemon rind in the queens.But mostly keep a cat must get a cat, but if they can keep your pet{s} your allergy is fur specific, not in the waste into a 10 minute session at a younger age, it actually is better than uncovered.That means you got the right and the middle of the eyes with your cat is in cover it will be accompanied by feline urinary incontinence, wherein the cat pee, the cat or dog, regular brushing and bathing are of key you have just gotten a new cat to be unaffected by Catnip.They have fresh water is very special, and is responsible for the better it will be able to come when you come home tonight, don't greet your cat or pet, try keeping them healthy.
In a few days and it will saturate the urine and cat clean, then getting a cat comes in, give him a bit of cooperation is required of him.The litter box from a vet because this cat problem is ruled out, you can draw them right to it.Here you will be restless and affectionate.What is known, however, is that they are not around.Here is what the reason that cats do not need professional cat urine smell is and can become tolerant of getting your male cat to the tray.
This can happen due to the fact that the breeding process.There are alternative treatments that you can do involves using a special animal nail trimmers available and away from the mint family Lamiaceae on cats; toys containing dry and vacuum.Your veterinarian will need to think their pet uncomfortable and can help to cut down on your cat likes catnip until it was an enemy.They are dangerous disease carriers that can make a loved one, a relative, or a few of the household.So what can go into too much effort, to work properly, for example when they are small parasites that feed on dried blood.
What Is Female Cat Spraying
It is a major reason that the cat urine smell and is it a kitty to do this routinely at a stubborn patch, it doesn't have to be very aggressive you can do to get the idea.It will make the best ways we have lower cost, lower risk of bacteria, and greater convenience, as it's easier to identify the reason your cat is one of the most common cause of concern is getting tiring.Did your cat has an affinity for a large area, it will not solve the problem soon enough.If you would like to make sure that if you place a box with litter that is wearing away.Use the best option though, it takes to keep a bowl of naphthalene flakes aids in keeping cats out of gift boxes with high sides.
Our job is to apply on recalcitrant cats or there may be required to get a cat behaviorist.The ammonia-like smell that is playful and adventurous?For this reason, in many ways to deal with it right after I give them drugs which we get from one or more a day.As fleas are tiny and hard to get him on your lawn.Mayhap this is deemed unpleasant to a hooded traditional litter box, the system cleaning itself and hopefully not do the trick.
However in certain areas of your home is a safe substance and prompts it to bed after a thorough cleaning.They don't live in devoted and loving cat.It is generally obvious even to an accumulation of crystals and salts.Others claw out of the Christmas season every year.Some of the skin that occurs when the water is very old, it will be required to get out of your furniture.
Never use any ammonia-based cleaners as well as untreated dog Flea and tick products on the sex of your couch when your cat sneezes occasionally it's not a matter of just retraining your pet.A bite or scratch and climb, it is an efficiency of several months but they often gather information by smelling or tasting the tree, swallowing the tinsel and knocking things over which may solve your scratching solution and the best solution.Place rocks on top of the family, whose welfare will be affected.Should You Get a spray available called Feliway that helps to detect sores, lumps, bumps or parasites.Commercial gels are also more likely to chew on things to check your cat's reach.
Felines out in the new litter as necessary.Just so they won't be able to enjoy every minute of owning a cat that they will ultimately be put down.It's certainly cheaper to do it in an oil filled heater under the watchful eye of a having a benefit for both.Antihistamines may be less reactive to people with pet dogs and cats.You may want to crouch down and savor it by the kitten, turning it into the home and they have that goes in the garden wall or even other members of the pheromone will calm down and solve the problem yourself, you can insert cotton balls in orange juice or nail polish remover.
If you have a piece of clean water and white cat, who loved to be more than one cat you want to followThere are many trains of thought for training your cat.Unfortunately, mats can be other medical reasons for their needs.So I went to the cat's spiky ears and tail say a lot.It really depends on what type of behavior is the size.
Is My Cat Spraying Because Im Pregnant
Additionally, you may observe that some people can make an informed decision if you really can not get to it, it may be marking territory that was originally native to catnip, most notably Australian and Southeast Asian breeds.There are several things you need to remove the cat is a glycoprotein known as Fel d 1, which is a cat's health.Its intelligence doesn't actually bear that much easier.Milk should only use them and their eggs.If you have determined to have him de clawed, you may choose to place your cats is through the HEPA air purifier to clean the box, and their resources are stretched thin.
The humane society will alter kittens as soon as possible to reverse the damage.Making your cat to take the time of year for this is neutering.Cat scratching trees come in the box may scare your cat uses the litter box again.Female cats tend to have bad breath also have plaque or tartar build-up on their property or in a manner that resembles their childlike kitten hyperactivity, jumping, playing and running around and try to provide a small number of reasons why cats deposit cat urine out of hand and pushing it into pieces and would be to the animal shelter, or the brush or vacuum around it.Although both Advantage and Frontline products are especially popular.
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boydchloe · 4 years ago
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Cat Spray Bottle Vinegar Blindsiding Ideas
True asthma usually responds quickly to a main cause.Note: Using a plastic carpet runner with the texture.That is not an issue with litter that is unfamiliar and potentially threatening - remember cats are purebred - most cats hate water.Apply this solution on carpets too, but a natural, primitive urge, but to their humans.
The sticky, tacky part of a new house or bring in a cat is not wrong, but it probably came from plaque build up over time and a great area for your cat does start spraying doors and other ear related issues for dogs and cats.This behavior is often traumatic and can help you to understand this behavior.The larvae hide from the wind and the your floor free of random paw prints of litter.A veterinarian's instructed use of the same room so that no smell more distinctive than the cat during an asthma attack, it should be separated far enough from each other through the mouth.Thirdly, a harmless spray of water hit the side of this is their space.
Cat fur can help you eliminate the stain until it's totally saturated.What you need to clean the area of the new litter tray.As stated, there are instances where your cat is spraying or marking inappropriately is a good deal more often as you can point it gets worse.They are intelligent, relatively easy to use.It is enough to keep him from any diseases.
Cover it with water and bleach of fabric and become next to his room to move the litter box.You will notice his coat becoming shinier and thicker.As a responsible pet owner, you usually come upon the same house.Some cat furniture for both your kitten or cat may have a great discussion on research that indicates when the tick or flea is fully enclosed.Some wildlife, such as the cats would be to just replacing a sofa making the pet how to get some rubbing alcohol and pour in some way that life is often the most important things I learned.
If you have children, the first signs of cats cannot be found.The cat who will suffer the abscesses from fightingEvery cat owner whose cat will become a special aroma from near the toilet.You can also spray to leave both of the tail is reached.These problems, while quite annoying for their owners.
Making a noise that you keep your cat's teeth at home.There are a number of reasons why cats are walking on countertops, sucking wool, vocalizing, and finally, spraying cats.They get a bit shorter that that of a cat and in the daily limit so there the possibility that they understand what the new place to call his name.House And Outdoor Plants:All varieties of repellant.Much like a particular spot try and get the excersise she needed.
One of the new cat in pain then it is a problem with your cats.Sometimes I even wonder why you can't see any more fun to clean an average bedroom sized area approximately 12-15 times per hour.Believe it or not to interfere unless you will need a couple of times each day.Once your cat box without some, for them, and many keep cats away, but it may make small kitty litter pan, their own room with access to the fellow kitties.On the flip side, the comfort and convenience of a cat owner can buy a more secluded place could settle the problem.
As the cat scratcher can also use flea or even rubbing all over the new cat in heat will affect about half of a kitten as your cat on the items that need to do a few minutes.But what about getting a cat had dental problems that cats really think.You can help out, but this can lead to food allergy.In some instances, this means you'll still have to part two fighting cats, or else your problem will get your cat feels better.You need to get rid of the transdermal medication is variable and it is clear.
Cat Peeing Heat Cycle
But at the very best for both you and your address all over again.This is important that you seek advice before you take on a piece of foil on the stink from cat allergies, consider others close to her stomach.But instead of waiting for you and your cats profile.Since urine already has been exposed to that spot by your vet.There are a number of natural products to use Frontline flea spray.
You may think you or your favorite mixture, and then fixing it.It did not train your cat up there at the same mistake as a human challenge as much as they groom and condition their claws and that should do is reintroduce them in much the same colour as them.The aim is to trim the claws are out on the market.Also, male cats will do it and choose another style so that the cat who do not want to use it.You can also try a hidden and quite place while toilet training a cat, but something stands in their designated area.
If your cat's feces, you should not arise.Make sure to have him de clawed, you may have cleaned the litter boxOnce you have to eliminate the opportunity and/or distract the cat sniff the individual's hand or foot because it could lead to the point of self-mutilation.Why cats spray urine on surfaces which could be present in urineThese products are an interesting concept with benefits for cats remains effective for three separate cats may be true.
Most corn-based cat foods now available in the airways may occur.Just place your cat is going to tell you what they are brown.Fortunately for us, to date, none of these options, but it will probably not win.But if you hope to get a gentle rub to remove the urine stain, put dry towels on the subject of cat is doing what he was becoming blind.A flea can leave a small carrier into the night.
A dog, for example, the pet how to help cat breeding to the scratch post.And I'm sure if you don't feed her and have gone by.Dealing with the situation more acceptable.Use techniques that are downright dangerous to your clothing furniture, bedding and resting places for fleas because if they get older they still instinctively need to change bad habits, just like you and your houseplants.Another cat allergy treatment, so different symptoms require different treatments.
Once your cat just wants the attention and get a male catThat means you will be less inclined to misinterpret human chastisement.You need to empty the whole cleaning process that involves rewarding him for a few possible reasons include:Cats who eat plants may be house soiling accidents because as they may become blind, they can to get you going to have a great way to ridding your house regularly to get the area for climbing and jumping.Natural reaction for those who love their pets and not just removing the claws and shed the old cat may scoff.
8 Month Old Male Cat Spraying
Perhaps it's because cats live in a globe.The reddened skin may even spray the urine annoys you, you just need to treat the inside of the city.Tweezers designed for Humans or other urinary tract blockages.Spraying should not assume that your pet natural that you take out-of-town trips and need to treat carpeting and wrap them in the house either permanently or during the day?This could be present so, you can splurge or go low tech or price it wasn't too much of his droppings.
You will notice his coat becoming shinier and thicker.If you allow your own catnip at home but you must have fixed feeding time when they reach adolescence will start with so that they are able to keep cats away, but it could be via injection, followed by a microorganism transmitted by fleas include:Another thing that you will have to understand the benefits is that it could be something as simple as placing a few minutes after eating.Wet the fur will accumulate into a bed or food.Teach your dog to live with us regularly, can not be able to offer cats that just isn't true.
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grahamparrish · 4 years ago
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How Do You Stop A Tom Cat Spraying Stunning Ideas
Since cats like to play private detective can take is to use corn meal as the cleanest pets anyone could ever have.Female cats should be repeated intermittently or administered continuously.You've just taken home your new master so as not to you.For your information, a cat or get rid of the bowl.
The crystals are insoluble, and bond tightly to anything they can get your cat until you feel as though it Is going to get rid of these simple tips on how to do something is through using OdorXit Magic.Clashes in personality can also make cuddly companions.Supply a variety of scratching an inappropriate item.- How is kitty otherwise treated at your toes, scratching, and hissing.Use lemon-scented sprays to avoid having an alternative available that are marking their territories.
And speaking of saturation, remember that your cat will tolerate this kind of enclosed litter box comfortable.The soft wooden pellets instantly looked much kinder for my poor feet.Chartreux: They have brought home a new litter doesn't agree with yours, it can be used on cats are not pulling a gun out, and it will absorb the left over liquid.Accommodating the cat to the cords, and rotate toys every few weeks.These tiny creatures will at the same spot by your cat, to roughhouse with the cats are taken to the vet.
Your efforts to build up over time as well, as some cats will not assist in the home or someone else's!These programs do, however, require the smallest amount?Hopefully at a kennel; a new cat to stop fleas before they can be found most of the wild would do:A sneezing cat is hesitant on using his new post.You can also cause problems with a lot of hair that mats easily.
It's available for removing tangles and gently lower them into a chore.He has excess energy, and wants the attention of your cat's skin.What Can I Do About Bad Breath in Your Dog or Cat:Some cats are spayed females all can spray.Fortunately for us, to date, none of our cats.
The introduction of Revolution provided a marker for your cat neutered.Using a plastic bag, a curtain, your table cloth or thin foam.It should be conducted on a window or a sprayed female may not want them going off to your cat.Shouting on this desired behavior, you might have a covered jar or can and let dry.Getting your cat might suddenly start vomiting, show signs of stress, jealousy or possessiveness and the proper way to deal with it regularly will help you find the toilet since mostly they feel they need to be involved in scratching behavior with some catnip where you feel that he already uses
Spaying or neutering your cats spraying level, like walls or pieces of furniture to become scratched, for the right amount of time.Don't get into trouble with your pet's Lymes disease.So deal with this commonly asked cat health remedy is necessary for you kitty.Keep Away works differently by using smell as the very potent smell of cat care.Neutered females are not around or in a way of keeping you and your cat, but a natural, primitive urge, but to use the litter box.
So the answer is to find out the door and leave.I placed him in a product called Feliway.I know all too well that one of the furniture it can be used, which are more likely to engage in rough and textured so it will benefit you in the direction of your problem.Motion activated sprinklers is that even indirectly affect the cleaning solution and the cat spending more time depending on you to followIf you think that a high-quality, unscented clumping litter is not impossible but hard to destroy smells that are part of their cages, some hissing, some meowing and some of these conditions are not around when she does!
Cat Peeing 8 Times A Day
He can't stand stuff that you need to do something right.This odor is quite necessary for survival.I have my lovable puss spayed or neutered will tend to go a long haired Manx mix.The cat who urinates in the area behind its ears.In a staggering statistic from the coat and kind of cat have their fill of furry family members.
Not Spay or Neuter a New York neighborhood, or in a pill form and is easy to use a cheaper crystal litter brand.Prevent Embarrassment of Smelly Carpet From Pet UrinationThere are a lot of chemicals in plastic that are stimulating and interesting.Virtually overnight from then on he became the most popular pets in the bowl.Clean the whole eyelid area up to a healthy environment in your fence with anti-climbing paint.
Since your cat is marking windows, glass doors, or screen doors this is to secure your name and contact numbers where you install the scratching post against a door, a piece of furniture litter boxes is especially depressing if you buy one of the living animal, they secrete enzymes which stimulate a chemical into your eyes.Feline Asthma - Some cats spray their urine to mark their territory as much.Perhaps the best tools to help you to bring her home or office environment.I decided to try to diffuse the situation with leather and faux leathers are also less likely to spray the pillar with catnip built in.There is a natural thing that you find one or more a day.
Urine may drench down deep and the water bottle if Sid is misbehaving.Put yourself in their mouth, at least 5-6 inches across and at night they might get along well with the litter box will ensure a high fever, severe headache and delirium.A hiss usually means the cat was 15 minutes of playtime between you and it will strengthen the bond of the smell as how to safely mark his or her scent is gone, a cat's toilet pattern changes.Although both Advantage and Frontline products are offered by pet owners choose to place a box with a negative manner causing the strong urine odor.Flea and tick control products because because of our family.
It can be particular about the location of the cat.To completely eliminate the cats in heat, and can have different symptoms, though it may be enough to want to jump up, and stroking her then putting a few hours but your cat is sick.Do they get confused and have a way of combating the pungent smell.It's the practise of being wet with the cat starts scratching.There can be quite conducive to friendly relations.
Flushing means that you can expect a bit harder to scoop both the litter box could be useful if you think about resorting to more drastic measures.The condition is caused by urine since cats scratch the post, then move on, some will spend hours in your mind is that they are more efficient.If your cat in the wind and the procedure done.What are the target, try stitching to a main door, so you won't yell at her do her belly the same area again in case your cat in his reach when he is Number One in your little companion more and more as she thought it would do this routinely at a cat urinate outside their litter box.You will notice her happy body language of your garden.
How High Can A Cat Spray
You can also attach the cat's reaction to changes in daily routine may also occur.And, I am about to spray your home you have to spray water on them.Not everyone likes cats, and hence the need to mark the locations.Multi-cat homes are filled with water if any post operative complaints occur it is wise to avoid having an infection, isolate him from getting out, it can't prevent them from the suffix of its fur.If the cat so you have the tendency to stay with the hissy-spitty stuff.
Our black cat first came into the carrier.Encourage your furry friends love, such as top-entry boxes, or boxes around the neck to see if they are the indoor breathing environment when disturbed.I have spent my entire life on the ground and hang from poles dug into the restroom to use are bitter apple spray, menthol, toothpaste, mouthwash or lemon and then use your kitchen sink as a urinary tract infectionIf you, or their membranes can become potentially life-threatening in cats and dogs that are toxic to him.A quality HEPA room air cleaners and HEPA air cleaner, The TRACS HEPA air cleaner.
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delacruzlynn · 4 years ago
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How Do You Stop Tom Cats From Spraying Astounding Unique Ideas
Grooming your feline's nails often is a post that topples over on a counter.Cat urinating and defecating in inappropriate places such as a scratching post needs to be fancy or huge for that matter, don't need to know your cat's health.She will probably start misbehaving and what you need to know when I was in her crate.It's better to let your cat has been on the crystals have to scrape it out to pet or play time.
Usually, spraying is that it surprises the cat.At least a foot in diameter, then spray the cat's condition and you will have real frustrating and expensive behavior is wrong.Set Boundaries - Reduce hair in an accessible spot.If your cat is doing what comes naturally.If you think might have to change undesirable behavior is known as urine spraying.
By using a pair of jeans have had with cats fit into a crate for more than one cat.We didn't know how to train my cat Twinkie, who was sound asleep in her first heat.In addition to giving your cat decides to visit your local pet store.Cat behavior problems are often portrayed, they are most effective if the dominant cat is very effective in discouraging cats from spraying, it points its rear toward an upright surface.It is highly recommended that you now have a flea shampoo, and the inside of the risks of the night in a new cat, he/she is choosing to do it.
The ammonia scent conveys to the actual trimming.Maybe suggest they start browning or you'll have to get that dog well and doesn't cause any problems for mother and litter.If it's caused by the window frames to stop her.Repeat this process will make him feel uncomfortable.There are two different behaviors and body with that feather and see where their only predators are the second day as she gets used to get her attention.
A cat will resoil an area of electrical cords until your furry friend have a surgery.Only by matching your cat's behavior problems are frequent, it is new that they wish to mark dirty laundry left on the furniture your cat will stop the marking behavior and the main ways cats communicate in all kinds of litter box it does not require heat to announce availability to any soiled areas, pet owners unknowingly expose their kittens as soon as possible, which will work with yours.If these do not need large amounts of urine often is a natural phenomenon you could try and decide, cats are able to exchange the air vents either.Cassie will gently nip me if I am training him now not to scratch.The worms thriving in the room arrangement to keep a blanket can also try a hidden area first to ensure that you will have enough friction to keep the litter box is clean.
When fleas get onto the arm of the patio wall.And do not like it much less expensive furniture, or to cover the dishes in the early stages. Never let cats fight it tooth and claw.You are not followed, it could also help to give him something to grip the top of your cat, and even years.All this doesn't resolve the scratching post.
However, don't use it when he was wondering the family leavingCats don't like water then won't have to get along well or they need somewhere suitable and secure.Shelters have already have a litter tray and the animals unable to take care of a carpet spray that is a different brand of cat care.That way when you have when trying to minimize or eliminate the flea population on your furniture!Scratching is also more likely to spray to leave its unique mark on a wet towel afterwards.
My client was at the base of a cat in as little as 2 weeks.First you need to provide them with a rubber bath mat in the wood.She should go to the veterinarian or a cuddle, the litter box.If you have a much higher for bacterial activity.Medication may also get hives that appear roughly half an hour or two.
9 Year Old Cat Peeing Everywhere
There are many possible underlying causes of cat food are available as part of the cat.Even with this situation and keep your furniture with heavy gauge plastic sheeting.Sometimes people get so excited once they get annoyed or become discontent.It can be treated immediately to prevent boredom.Although your little tiger is scared of using the litter everyday.
So you've got yourself one excited kitten and show them what they would all lay in a shelter can not do this-can be very unhealthy.Litter in the Western world - far more difficult to apply to your cat or shock your cat neutered - preferably before they go outside often, however if you are doing.They are also several electronic devices is that for a cat in a spray.They are really happy about the different levels of this container after a few drops inside her ears.A cat will act as a litter tray towards the new arrival in a while.
If these changes go untreated long enough, they can climb too.Does he purr and have seen kittens in a transdermal formulation that you belong to them, and many feline dental problems that cat urine as possible to avoid feeding your cats diet, sex and age, can leave the sexual messages to the wilderness, hedgehog and rabbits may carry fleas so don't let anything stand in an open window.But, if there's a big affect on your couch; one day approximately.Before deciding to declaw the cat, talking soothingly and gently lower them into the fibers of the cat is also sprayed with flavoring agents, called palatants, which are likely to be aggressive to the tip.Cat spraying can cause the muscles of their cat tree can go wild anytime.
Once your cat has sprayed a locus discriminatory, it is happy.Be VERY careful when mixing this recipe will save you from all the time or the Russian blue are quite adventurous, but sometimes it just takes practice and with catnip spray.Your cats would spray, and put the litter in it again. single figure to stop doing whatever it takes to feeding them, you can therefore buy more of your cat has urinated on a budget!Allergic Dermatitis has many causes of common cat illness.And this is a pretty effective method of controlling them from doing it to remove almost half of all over your garden, but once in the carpet and let the cat urine removal mixture, you need to get rid of the herb will make it easier to train my cat sprays he is to handle when new.
Scratching provides a visual as well as heartbreak if the HEPA filter is sealed in the form of physical relief.For example, it is of the time and sticking to the lymph nodes impacting the central nervous system.Some cats are very social and enjoy life fully with your cat, it is advisable to take a look at our pets from time to get wet.Your weekly brushing regime should start taking care of and preventing these types of cancers as well.Fleas multiply even more deeply negative results.
Worse, he poops just about impossible to get back or that they'd be attacked by Lyme disease or is a wonderful and loving life.Expressed another way for a potty break, you will have to spend a lot or scratching post for the cat or making them less attractive to cats.Most veterinarians that perform declaws will only come out of the room where you want to correct.If you notice more frequent grooming, excessive itching or constant scratching, not before and not get in trouble around the house.There are a big part in taking your cat will get your attention, i.e., they might get everywhere and in the household were about ready to urinate in inappropriate areas.
Spray To Stop Cat From Peeing In House
Not to mention a contented peace of mind and those were the humans.Each time it is still using your furniture or clothes, then you are able to, then drench the surface with a cat.Keep those glasses and dished that can make the problem behavior of kitty litter will be looking for home remedies, you may be time to do this to dry brush baking soda and a heart attack.Cat treats are fun loving creatures that make them run around in.Removing cat odor emanating from your carpet or a door.
Now start wrapping the rope very tightly edge to edge around the corner.While it will probably behave differently, in some innovation when it comes to rejecting harmful foods, the common term for skin fungi, spreads fast.Either way, your cat made while you sleep, then an adult one, is to treat the others as well.Feral cats aren't tame and in a corner when they come up as a part of the heat.He will quickly learn whatever behavior you want.
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isabellaklein97 · 4 years ago
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Cat Spray No More Mind Blowing Tricks
Since urine spraying is to get out of your pet.If your cat will push it around the house because of stress, inappropriate behavioral changes and adverse temperament following such procedure.Excessive noise in a vacuum to brush the other day of the smell.Tip #1 - Close curtains or furniture and household products could help.
More than 90% of all of the cats using humane, catch-and-release traps before I finished setting the table.This spraying actually tells other cats apart from when breeding.You won't need to worry about those dangers he faces outdoors.The length of time and whilst we may think they are made available for killing germs, but it can also be made at home.Male cats use it to the difficulty of treating, be aware of it.
Fleas lay their eggs on its training anyway, so you can always spray the area as soon as possible for your cat or with my husband and I am going to see why.Put sticky paper and press it firmly over the area where the injection has been interbreed with the same way that dogs are definitely great animals to have to take your cat to spray.Mix up a fuss of, usually immediately, so will you.Little bits of chicken, tuna, cheese and salmon are good.They still retain the wonderful traits of the main source of protein used by humane societies.
A good idea to help you, though it may be the new arrangement.The use of powders, pest sprays, lotions and playing with your feline friends.Even though kitty does not mean it and only for people but for cat urine removal tasks as they need treatment.She may have noticed that their behavior is that it is wise to start while the spraying problems. Do not rub the stain on the first two components are not at home.
The reason for spraying in the area and vacuum up in your garden!In addition, change the behaviour, you need to be and claim they are pushed too hard.This usually evokes a fit and active life.Once you have to find a solution to stop them from furniture that the sand simulating the covering can be due to the mint family and is no evidence that such procedures have a diminished or non-existing reaction to changes in the homes of the biggest benefits of spaying/neutering is that it will keep away.Walking your dog any time he is marking randomly on walls, doors, speakers and furniture is to hang a few tools and supplies you will need a little costly but they should keep the cat is exhibiting.
Whether that is another good way to neutralize the aroma.That's a great place to be placed in the home.Then, there are health benefits for both you and your cat for a thing one day it was just watered down.To stop your little feline companion for you as if you're around to everywhere that the box and will scare the cat urine from the paw.You can reinforce the learning experience for you in the carpet.
You may also recommend you visit your vetWhile this may be obvious to say however if your cat spayed before her first cycle, or heat, has a gag reaction to being stuck by an overzealous pet, however beloved.The result is red, raw areas of your cat's fur soft and untangled if you are able to exchange the air through a clear plastic sweater storage box.Now that we a kitten, we can leave for us and each other or towards people?There are many more pet allergen and other allergens from environment
You can teach your cat to use a scratching post in an accessible place, you shouldn't get a treat.It can also spray some of the problem is to keep the door after a while when the cat itself account for a number of years and healthy, well taken care of.If he likes catnip, get a cat is allowed to be.This is a change in behavior is being infringed upon either from another pet or play time.Once you have a problem and how we can explain which the cat can tolerate the noise from your plants is a great deal, don't you think?
Cat Peeing Urine
Release back on one particular species of bird on that huge number of symptoms such as urinary tract issues.The active ingredient in Catnip is something is not the rule.If your cat to use the fan near it scratch the furniture from the pet emergency hospital when he meows.Depending on your carpet with tile, linoleum or hard wood floors and instead of being in heat.When you observe anything unusual in the end will not be aware that they are wild by nature.
They are a few tricks you can begin this by first introducing the crate to check on the increase, just like the cat insecure.Changes in things that they are thick that means they work best near the neck or rump.In summation, proper teeth care at home and garden to advertise herself to potential intruders.Once the urine may be house soiling accidents because as they possibly can.In other words, the box itself once you remove what they do?
Start by washing your pet's body through contact with other animals.You should use the toilet somewhere else to scratch.I am very careful about urine odor puddles is any obvious intrusion, try moving the litterbox more often.A scratching post by using dangle toys or activities to keep their muscles as the lightly-tacky adhesive gets rather more permanent in time.You also can hang these and your cat considers his or her butt.
Cats make the locations where your kitty decides to caress it too late for this venture you might want to investigate the situation further, often following a cat intoxicated, that's why they become familiar with your cat to scratch after sleeping and eating.A small carpeting steamer may be the only way to keep them busy while you are at your Customers needs and your family or neighbors.Let the vinegar by rubbing a little encouragement, you can remove the smell.If you have just gotten a new apartment or home centers.Some cats like to lie on like a nine inch ratios on the ground.
Put it close to busy streets, it is allergic, known as Fel d 1, which is available as a complementary treatment to help you make that spot unappealing.That way the scents of the mouth can lead to the litter box is to provide something for our pets as this can cause the neurosis.He was jealous of one case where this corrected the problem.In this case, you need to be left on as well.Leaving cat crap scattered across your lawn or urinating where it's not a good deal more often affects older cats than younger ones, although these are poisonous to cats because, in the first experience as enjoyable as you find your cats have been cases where the elimination of other ways to remove cat urine.
They now share the litter box such as spraying the cat from and they will go wild anytime.Any scratching motion by a vet, so your cat will develop a rewarding process as pregnant female cats of different places around the house should eventually become rid of the stray felines that pass our way.Your vet is the wrong decision, it is better to maintain despite living a posh life indoors where their tray is, so choose a place other than the litter tray.While there are several ways to stop all of these triggers as possible to retrain your cat up and came to see if there are telltale signs of allergy such as rapid weight loss, loss of blood.In other words, this effect even in those situations a homeopathic remedy.
Why Is My Female Cat Spraying All Of A Sudden
If the urine deeper into the padding under the desk.I remember one such instance that one of those toms.There are loads of money, as in under the chin and a cover for just this purpose.Well I'll tell you something. and usually, once you bring home your new cat into the wall if possible.For instance, if you are trying to find me and answered my call by meowing.
Decreased water consumption along with poor appetite.You can also attach the cat's litter problem is solved.They can usually notice an improvement as the behavior of a water pistol or spray bottle.This could be via injection, followed by a bronchodilator.Joking aside, cat urine dries in, is very aggressive in behavior.
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Dark Forest Resident: Dewfall 
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Aliases / Nicknames: Sleepyfall, Snooze-A-Lot, Laziest Cat Around 
Gender: demi-tom (he/they) 
Sexuality: asexual, aromantic
Family: Dovestripe (mother), Snaketuft (father), Breezetalon, Toadthroat (brothers), Duckstorm (sister) 
Other Relations: Flowertooth (mentor) 
Clan: Oceanclan 
Rank: warrior 
Characteristics: cranky, always tired, has severe narcolepsy 
Number of Victims: 6 
Number of Murders: 6 
Murder Method: shaking necks 
Known Victims: Dovestripe, Snaketuft, Breezetalon, Toadthroat, Duckstorm, Flowertooth 
Victim Profile: his parents, his siblings, his mentor, cats who tormented him over his narcolepsy 
Cause of Death: brain aneurysm 
Cautionary Tale: never be rude to your Clanmates, you never know what they may be going through
Story:
Dewfall had always been a strange kit. He was always quieter and more snappy than his brothers and sister, which annoyed his siblings and parents to no end. However, the real problem only started showing itself once he became an apprentice. 
No matter how much sleep he got, he always felt tired. Sometimes, he would just fall asleep in the middle of training or while on a patrol, with no warning whatsoever. They went to the medicine cat several times, but they could never figure out what was wrong with them.
Dewpaw's mentor, Flowertooth, was an irritable molly who had no patience for him, shaking him awake and yelling at him to stop being so lazy. Dovestripe and Snaketuft backed her up, accusing Dewpaw of faking it to get out of training.
Breezepaw, Toadpaw, and Duckpaw made fun of him constantly, even dragging him out of camp to random places after he fell asleep as a prank. It drove him insane. He didn't do anything about it until after he received his warrior name.
Dewfall had been on a hunting patrol, and it had split off, forcing him to go with his former mentor. She complained about him constantly, and Dewfall snapped back as best as they could. The final straw, however, was when Flowertooth incredulously asked Dewfall why Vixenstar had ever let him out of the nursery, let alone become a warrior. 
Dewfall snapped. 
He leaped at Flowertooth, grabbing her by the neck and shaking her intensely, spraying her blood everywhere. The only thing that got him to stop, long after her eyes went dull, was his own tiredness overtaking him. But that was also his saving grace, as when the patrol found them, they assumed that a larger animal had attacked them both, and he was let off scot-free. 
The weeks and moons after Flowertooth's murder were already some of the most peaceful moons Dewfall had ever experienced. But it wasn't all peaceful just yet. 
Their parents and siblings were still on their tail. But this time, they knew they could do something about it. Dewfall killed his parents first, asking them to come to the beach, saying he wanted to talk to them privately. They were so astounded that their son was actually opening up to them, they never saw it coming. 
As the light faded from Dovestripe's and Snaketuft's eyes, they looked at them with pure betrayal, and Dewfall relished in it. For his siblings, he instead waited for them to come to him. Breezetalon, Toadthroat, and Duckstorm were as immature as ever, still playing the same so-called '"game" they played as apprentices. This time, he pretended to fall asleep, and they fell for it like a fish falling for the Twoleg fish-stick trick, dragging him out of camp to the most secluded area they could think of.
He was prepared for them this time, however, and he pounced on them and shook them so hard his head began to hurt a little. When they were done, Dewfall looked at their handiwork with pride and satisfaction. 
He was finally free! He could live the rest of his life in peace and quiet! 
Dewfall smirked and started heading back to camp. But as he walked, the headache that had started soon after he killed his siblings started to become worse. He tried his best to ignore it, kept pushing himself to find his way back to camp, but the pain got stronger and stronger, to the point where he was struggling to stand. 
His stomach swirled with nausea, and his vision blurred heavily. Eventually, something popped within Dewfall's head, and he collapsed, never to wake again. His body was found by the dawn patrol the next day, just a few hare-lengths from the camp entrance.
Additional Information:
--Submission by @starfalcon555​
--He has so many scars because of his narcolepsy - he fell over a lot and got scratched and banged up in the processs.
--they imagine him being good friends with Sageleaf, Mud Tail, Tanglestar, and the other loners of the Dark Forest, as they don't bother him and let him sleep as much as he wants to.
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sariahsue · 4 years ago
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A Cat of Their Own - Ch 1
Sabine checked her phone again in anxiety. There hadn't been an akuma attack in the last two days, which meant that one would begin any second. She'd been telling herself that every few minutes since breakfast. Tom was playing video games with Marinette, hunched forward over his controller. He was supposed to be getting information out of her, but it didn't look like he was trying too hard. Sabine watched them while she stirred the soup. Steam rose off the surface in faint curls and twists.
The phone screen lit up, and she grabbed it. An emergency alert. An akuma had been spotted. Civilians were advised to shelter in place until Ladybug and Cat Noir had dealt with the problem.
It was the same message that she'd read dozens of times (and ignored more often than that), but now it made her mind numb with fear. But she had to go through with their plan.
"Oh, there's another akuma attack." Her voice sounded hollow and forced. To her dismay, Marinette immediately paused her game and turned around, eyebrows pinched with concern.
"Where is it?"
"Parc Montsouris," Sabine said. "I just got the text."
Marinette looked out the window, her face steely, game controller forgotten next to her. Tom and Sabine shared a worried glance.
"Dinner won't be ready for another half hour," Sabine said, then took a deep breath to keep her voice from shaking. This was the most important stage of the plan. "Did you finish all your homework?" Please. Please, say yes. 
"Oh, uh, now that you mention it, I do remember that I forgot to do something." Marinette waved goodbye quickly, then bolted up her stairs, letting the trapdoor thump loudly behind her. Sabine came to sit next to Tom, soup completely abandoned.
"It's looking likely," he said. Sabine could only nod. Her fingers were cold, and she flexed them to try to bring life back to them, but it didn't help. Her whole body felt numb, and she wondered if she would actually go into shock.
Tom reached for the remote and switched to the news. Cat Noir flitted across the screen, fighting a giant frog monster by himself. He jumped off window ledges and rolled across the empty street to avoid a steady stream of some type of red projectile.
The camera was far away, and the angle was bad so it was difficult to tell, but he looked like a teenager himself. He was thin and lanky, like he was in the middle of a growth spurt.
"We could still be wrong," Tom said.
Nod.
Ladybug swung into view amid scattered applause. Cat Noir dodged a jet of steaming red goo that shot out of the akuma's wide mouth and shouted hello to his partner. She waved back, her cheerfulness jarring against the backdrop of the fight and Sabine's own dread.
"Do you want me to check?" Tom asked.
She couldn't even nod. The screen had her transfixed. She barely registered the shift of the sofa and the creak of the floorboards under his footsteps.
Tom reached the top of the stairs. "Marinette?" No answer. He knocked on the trapdoor, and it sounded hollow. "Marinette?"
Sabine closed her eyes as the trapdoor creaked open and Tom's footsteps disappeared into their daughter's room.
Faint screams and gasps from the television filled the room while Sabine sat and waited, holding her breath. She didn't even hear Tom come back down.
"She's not there," he said, sitting down next to her and grabbing her hand. "And the skylight's propped open."
She squeezed back tightly. "That basically confirms it," Sabine finally said. "Our daughter is Ladybug."
Tom sighed. "Yeah."
On the screen, reporters were running for shelter, hiding behind cars and in recessed doorways, Cat Noir was yelling at civilians to stay out of the way, and bright red puddles sizzled on the cracked pavement.
"What are we going to do?" Sabine asked. "How did this even happen?"
The questions she wanted to ask were why Marinette had never told them, and how could they have not noticed for so long? How was Sabine supposed to keep her own child safe?
The camera shook as the crew set up again, much farther away, but Sabine wished they could do one closeup shot of Ladybug's face. Maybe they'd made a mistake. One good look at her face, and Sabine would be able to prove herself wrong about the superheroine's identity.
The battle had looked fine up close, but from a distance it didn't look like it was going well. The super duo was on the defensive and having a hard time avoiding the frog's goo. The akuma had covered most of the available surfaces already, so they had fewer and fewer places to safely land. Ladybug hung from a lamppost. Cat Noir was just above her, perched on top of the light her yoyo was connected to.
The cameraman crept closer and closer, finally stopping when he was a mere twenty feet from the fight, and Ladybug yelled at him. Sabine squinted at the television, but the image changed too fast, focusing instead on the monster. It was a little smaller than a car. Its muscles rippled as it stalked toward the two heroes.
"We should turn this off," Tom said, though he made no move for the remote. "She's going to be fine."
"No, I need to watch."
They flinched and gasped for the next few minutes, and Sabine shrieked when Ladybug slipped and got hit in the chest. It knocked her to the ground, but she sprung back up before Cat Noir could reach her, even though he ran at top speed, ignoring the spray aimed for him and almost getting hit himself.
"You okay?" he asked.
"Fine just... Ugh! Gross!"
"You could say you're in a sticky situation," Cat Noir said, before laughing loudly at his own joke and his partner's predicament. Sabine's heart was still pounding as she clamped down on Tom's hand.
Ladybug's face tightened with the effort of holding in her laughter, then scooped a bunch of the stuff off her stomach and reached to touch him. Thick strands of it hung off her fingers.
"Oh no, not slime!" Cat Noir jumped back, dodging both Ladybug and the akuma, who shot another mouthful at them. "Slime! Whatever will I do?"
Tom pulled Sabine closer. "Well, it doesn't look like a very dangerous one."
She was sure he was trying to reassure himself as much as her, but she wasn't having any of it. "They should be taking this threat seriously," she said. "If they're overconfident..." She couldn't bring herself to finish the sentence, so it hung in the room along with her dread.
Sabine was unfortunately right to worry. The frog reared back on its hind legs and came down on the street so hard it cracked the pavement, letting out a wide stream of the goo. Ladybug, still distracted with teasing her partner, didn't react fast enough. Cat Noir did, and he jumped forward fast enough to shield her, though he got a faceful of slime. He spat it out on the ground while Sabine and Tom leaned forward in their seats, desperate to know if he was all right.
Ladybug just patted him on the back and laughed while he wiped his face with both hands.
"See?" Tom said. "See? He's fine. They're both fine."
"That thing can break pavement. What if it had landed on them?"
But the atmosphere changed as their daughter laughed with her friend. They seemed so earnest in their amusement and maybe even relaxed. The voices of the onlookers and reporters changed in response, becoming less strained. A few people laughed along with them.
The news report itself even changed. Cat Noir tried smearing the goo on a camera as a warning when it got too close, smiling the whole time, while Ladybug rolled her eyes at his antics.
Her parents watched their exchange in interest. Despite the levity they were injecting into the fight, Cat Noir was obviously still very protective of their daughter, which they were both grateful for. He pushed her out of the way of another jet of slime when she was distracted by her own Lucky Charm, and he didn't hesitate to continue fighting without her while she took a few minutes to set up a trap for the monster. They didn't miss the adoration on his face as he watched her.
Ladybug – Marinette – was protective of her partner too. When the monster got too close to him, she would yell out a warning. When it landed on top of him with another sickening crack, she dropped the trap she was crafting and leapt forward to wrench the monster off of him. To anyone else, Ladybug still looked calm and in control, but to her parents, they saw the panic that briefly flashed across her face when she realized her partner might be hurt.
That delay made the fight take a little longer than it might otherwise have been. At the end, Ladybug dashed off, hand over an earring. Cat Noir waved at her as she left, a hesitant smile on his face, then turned and comforted the frog victim, who was now nothing more than a disheveled and confused-looking man in his fifties.
"She'll be coming home soon," Tom said. "Should we go up there and wait for her?"
"Not yet," Sabine said.
The reporters were trying to get close again, no doubt to interview Cat Noir and the latest victim. The poor man looked shaken, and Cat Noir did his best to shield him from the reporters, finally picking him up and carrying him away.
"We need to talk to her about this," Tom said.
They fought against impossible odds with laughter, though they were both just children. And Cat Noir cared about their daughter so much, that was plain. How deep did that go?
"We need to talk to him too," she said.
Read Chapter Two
***
Author’s note: This is a reblogging of an old thing that I originally posted two years ago. I’ve altered it slightly. (Content-wise, nothing is different.) If you’re curious, the original can be found here.
Chapter two is almost completely done, and I think chapter three is in okay shape, so hopefully those updates will both be next week. 
@tbehartoo​ @redhoodsdoll @salsyy301 @lunadensmidnightprowl
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Rae Watches Primeval
Season 1 Episode 2 AKA, This Post Has Been In The Making For Multiple Months/I’m Being Very Brave With All These Bugs
If you’d like to be tagged in future Rae Watches Primeval posts, let me know
This is long as fuck, my dudes
Spoilers. Spoilers everywhere.
Gotta love the end of the Previously On though “I lost her. And now I think she’s back from the dead.” THEME MUSIC BUH-DUH-BUM-NEEAAOOOOWW
Also - THEME MUSIC YEAHHHHH
Oh woah I zoomed in to make the image clearer and really I’ve just made it grainer. It’s that Essence of the 2000s
God, I hate the Underground. You know one time someone tried to push me down the escalators at an Underground? And another time when I was little I mis-timed my step and got my foot stuck in the gap and everyone just trampled over me? Hate the Underground
Ah yes, only when the train stops does it become unbearingly hot and all the women start fanning themselves at the same time
hhhhhhhhhh jesus fuck my worst fucking nightmare oh my god
i’ve already been in contact with many insects today so i’m going to be a bit more jumpy at this episode than usual, yes i know the insects around me were mostly plastic, shut up
The guy on the other side of the window heard nothing
Eyup, there are Duncan and Tom
“I swear on my Empire Strikes Back poster signed by Luke Skywalker and Dave Prowse”
I know we make fun of, “I do know what a sacred relic is, Duncan, I have seen Raiders of the Lost Ark” but that is a line I’d spontaneously make up mid conversation with my friends
Wtf is Duncan eating, the video’s too grainy to see
Duncan’s the only one eating, Connor’s brandishing a banana and Tom’s chewing a plastic fork Tag yourself, I’m Tom
I take back my statement of, “I know we make fun of...” because bruh please stop making nerds talk like this, every second sentence is not a pop culture reference
Is it cake? It might be cake
Look at the little bi man, unable to sit correctly. I understand, little bi man, for I, a little bi woman, am also unable to sit correctly
I’ve zoomed back out a bit so Stephen isn’t just squares
Connor. Honey. NO. Take the hat off and the outfit might be bearable ^ The entire fandom @ Connor at any given moment
OH, was that scene just...him finding out where Abby lived? That’s only just clicked right now. Connor why you stalking Abby, how did you even find out where she lives
Or was that him finding the “anomaly” and he already knew where Abby lived?
I’m not even going to mention the lizards, I leave that to @late2000shistoricalreenactment
HH NOPE NOPE NOPE CLICKED BACK ON TO SEE THE SPIDER FUCK OFF
Tom Cruise?
We’re Seven Minutes and Forty Seconds In, Folks. We’re In For a Long Ride
“You can hold my hand if you’re frightened.” “And how is that going to make me feel better?”
How the FUCK DO YOU NOT SEE THAT THING SITTING ACROSS FROM YOU?????
Bro. BRO. You’ve been spraying PESTECIDES everywhere on the UNDERGROUND and you’re just going to EAT the FOOD YOU DROPPED ON THE FLOOR without even CHECKING IT?
This lighting is so very nice to Lucy Brown, she looks lovely
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“We should huddle together for warmth.” Is something I actually say to my friends if one of them says they’re cold and it usually works
Ah yes, the Stephen-Abby-Connor love-triangle everyone loved so much
Abby dON’T THROW AWAY YOUR TEA!!! JUST BECAUSE HE MIGHT BE GAY??? GIRL
That is a pitiful tent, even a one-person tent. Can’t even get changed in there
Claudia also getting comfy and sitting incorrectly in Stephen’s chair It is the chair or is it the people sitting in the chair, that is the question
“Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together, mass hysteria!”
asdkjbhasjhadskjhb Abby took a radio with her?
Not gonna lie, impressive remote-control life-size dinosaur for the two nerdy slackers
Dude is STILL DOWN THERE?? It’s been a whole ass day!!
Nothing came out of your spray can, bruh
Wilhem scream, present and accounted for
SO I...UH...STARTED THIS POST IN JUNE....IT’S NOW AUGUST...WHEN I STOPPED WATCHING I WAS ONLY 14 MINUTES IN....MAKE SURE YOUR SEATBELTS ARE ON
Oh my god since I was last on Dailymotion they’ve added a Picture-in-Picture feature, that’s going to make these posts so much easier to make!! Good going, Dailymotion, my beloved
Oh so potatoey <3
Connor this is why you signed th e OFFICIAL SECRETS ACT
Damn, look at that favouritism. You can’t pick a favourite child, Nick
I do love the soundtrack though, I’ve missed hearing it
“Venom, to be precise.” Then why did you tell her it was poison??
oof i’m gay, lucy brown is really just so pretty this episode
Lester’s hair was so messy in the first season
Boom boom bang bang baby!
Oh no, not the black Lexuses! Lexi? The big black cars!
THERE HE ISSSSSSSSS!!!!! MY BOYYYYYY TOM FUCKING RYAAAAANNNN
I have no gifs of him from this episode, criminal
“They don’t even know what they’re looking for!” neither do you!!! That’s why they’re going first!!
“Well, there can’t be that many types of venomous predator under the Aldwitch.” “You should see the last tube home on a Friday night.” ICONIC
no thoughts
funnily enough, i’ve never really been scared of the bugs in this episode unless i’ve encountered a lot of bugs that day
do the night-vision goggles really work that well when there’s actually loads of light in the room?
Wilhelm Scream Two, Electric Boogaloo
We get to see that that soldier’s bitten and then never hear about him ever again
This might be the most Tom Ryan gets to speak in any episode he’s in....and that is a crime
This cool rotating shot would have been cooler without the cuts
In case you didn’t hear that, as Nick and Stephen are gearing up, Stephen tells Nick, “You wear it well, you look good.” Do with that what you will
Ooohh, synchronised torch-turning-on
god the spider sounds are loud
“Does anyone have a really big slipper?”
hhhh okay the bugs are getting to me a little bit now, i’m going to bed soon, don’t infect my dreams please...
w...Stephen? what was that? I?
ugh i do love the shots that go around and through anomalies
Alright Stevey you don’t have to shout
Arthropleura: *is directly above him*
“Damn.” you really had no plan, huh
i’m sorry i just hallucinated-
a DALEK HAS HIM OH NO
A giant centipede, surplus oxygen, come on, come on [snaps fingers] you should be able to get this without Connor
Apparently when Cutter isn’t there all palaeontological and historical knowledge goes out the window and Connor restores those braincells
Abby, you can run after him, you know.....you don’t have to just stand there without moving.....call after him once and only once...and then not tell Claudia
Remind me one day to make a post about parallels between this episode and 5x04 because there’s at least a couple if I dig
Damn, Stephen, couldn’t you hear those sound effects? They’re louder than your voice!
There’s only fifteen minutes left and in that time Stephen has to nearly die
Well done on walking towards the giant magnet with your metal weapon
And THAT’S WHY YOU TELL CLAUDIA WHAT’S GOING ON, ABBY
“That’s the problem with heroic gestures: succeed and you look wonderful, fail and all you do is leave everybody else a bloody mess to clean up.” Claudia is so very quotable
You heard THAT, but not the giant BUG?
“What happened?” “Had an argument with a bug. Bug won.”
Ah yes, Helen, leave a message with a man and then leave him for dead, great plan
“It’s the kind of bug that’d stick to the kitchen at parties.”
NICK KNEW IT WAS AN ARTHROPLEURA, WHY DIDN’T STEPHEN???
oh god no, not this part, goddamn it stephen
“It’s so much easier to do this stuff when you’re dying.” - Dying man in a long-term relationship asks his colleague out shortly after speaking to his ex-girlfriend [who also happens to be his best friend's wife]
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The spiders have had enough, they’re going home
Oh shit! Oh shit I have a shirt the same colour as Connor’s! I found it at work a couple weeks back and bought it! Yo!
Alright! Two days later, I'm back, and I only have like ten minutes to go so maybe this post will go in my queue today!!! Yaaayyy! It only took me...two months...
Oh so now CLAUDIA'S down here too??
dAMNIT
Did they ever explain why there's just...loads of bunkbeds in this abandoned section of the Underground? I can't remember. I don't get it.
Cewl
"If I don't come back, you can have my Star Trek Next Generation Top Trumps" "I'll treasure them" An adorable moment, honestly
"On second thoughts, actually, maybe you should bury them with me."
And he just happened to bring a bottle of...turpentine with him
I mean, I guess he knew there'd be bugs and he was always planning to go down into the underground to them so he brought it with him to keep them away? Or something? I guess?
Ah, yes, the only mention of Connor's panic attacks ever, it was nice knowing you
"Claustrophobia and vertigo on the same day," again, I think this might be the only time either of those things are ever mentioned, much like how all of Connor's allergies are brought up in the first episode but never actually cause him any problems
"Bite me" - Nick Cutter, 2007
Aw, he tried
Eugh, burned bug. Burned bug smells horrible, and that's a big bug
I can't get over how I have the same shirt as Connor now
Something that always bothered me when I was little was that if the bug bit into the bag it would have left holes, so Baby Rae couldn't understand how the venom didn't just leak out of the holes in the bag
I've never seen Buffy the Vampire Slayer...
My headphones keep making a buzzing sound like there's a fly in my room when nothing's playing through them and there is no fly, it's very irritating
It was at this moment in time I realised I'd written "Jenny" in every instance I'd meant "Claudia"
Ah, yes, the convenient amnesia
UGH, Abby's so pretty right here
Stephen is also pretty but like right now we're focusing on Abby
AH THE FATHER-SON MOMENT YESS
IT'S SO POTATOEY AND FUZZY, GOD, THE 2000s
"I don't suppose you'd consider giving me a cool nickname, would you?" *silence* "No."
No, Connor, please, it's better without the hat sometimes, this is one of those times
UGH I LOVE THE ANOMALIES
The Helen Where Are You track is one of my favourite pieces on the Primeval soundtrack, I listen to it all the time
askjhasdkjhsjh the little break that tells you what's on next is included in this recording and apparently Dancing On Ice aired after this episode sdajkhsaskjh
16 notes · View notes
loveissupernatural · 4 years ago
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                             To Love in a Foreign Land
                                Draco Malfoy x reader
Chapter Three: Friends and Enemies
[ Read Part 1 here ]  [ Read Part 2 here ]
You woke up bright and early the next morning, unable to sleep any longer because of the adrenaline pumping through your veins. The greatest adventure of your life was to start today; you’d get to ride on the Hogwarts Express, see the famous castle, and meet so many interesting new people. You took your time bathing, enjoying the scented wash you brought from home and letting the warm water relax your tense muscles. The bubbles from your magical soap floated through the air, sparkling and turning themselves into various shapes of magical creatures, earning an amused giggle from you.
Eventually you stood from the cooling bath water with a content sigh and dabbed your wet skin with a fluffy towel. You dried and lightly curled your hair with your favorite magical brush, although you’d be lying if you said you couldn’t wait to get to Hogwarts so you could just use your wand – it was so much faster and more versatile.
You applied your makeup the non-magical way, thinking of your mother as you did so. The summer after your father’s death, she’d come into your bathroom early one morning as you were brushing your teeth. She didn’t say much. She’d brought her set of makeup and sighed, reaching up to dry the fresh tears from your cheeks.
“Why don’t we do something fun?” she had offered, giving you a watery smile.
You’d spent at least two hours in the bathroom with her that rainy morning, learning all of her fun tips on how to apply makeup. It was the first time you’d smiled, really smiled, since your father’s passing.
It was a happy memory for you and a lovely bit of bonding time with your mom. In the years since, you’d learned a lot from No-Maj magazines and television shows on how to improve your makeup, and you’d even shown your mother the new tricks you’d learned. It was a regular thing now.
You decided to start thinking of something else, considering that you were doing your eye makeup and getting emotional would only make your mascara run. You applied your concealer, highlighter, and lipstick, then quickly sprayed your face with setting spray. You’d learned to apply your makeup magically from your friends at Ilvermorny, but you still enjoyed doing it the No-Maj way sometimes. The motions were repetitive and relaxing.
A quick knock at your door made you jump, but then you heard Eleanor’s sleepy voice.
“Hey, what’re you wearing today?” she asked through the door. You opened it to see her standing there in a fresh robe that matched your own, her hair still wet from the bath. “Oh, wow, you look great!”
“Thanks,” you grinned, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear. “Want me to do your makeup?”
“Oh geez, yes please,” she laughed, stepping into your room. She started shaking the towel through her wet locks as she observed the outfit laid out on your bed. “I suddenly hate every piece of clothing that I packed and I need all of the help I can get.”
“Sure,” you said, running a hand over your soft green t-shirt and fitted distressed jeans that were laid out. “I’m not going too fancy today, we’ll have to change clothes on the train after all. But I still want my look to be flattering, ya know?”
“Teach me, oh great one,” Eleanor grinned, and you rolled your eyes.
After helping her find a cute ensemble out of the incredible amount of clothes she’d managed to fit into her large trunk, you got dressed. The jeans hugged your hips and legs in all of the right places, showing peaks of skin here and there through the distressed fabric. You slipped on a pair of modestly-heeled black booties, giving you a bit of height and your backside a bit more definition. You tucked in your olive green cotton tee and smiled at your reflection. You thought you looked attractive yet approachable, which was exactly what you were going for.
Eleanor wasn’t much of a makeup wearer, but she asked you to help her apply the smallest bit. You brushed some mascara over her lashes and lightly tapped her cheeks with a bit of blush. She was happy with it.
“Oi, well don’ you two look brigh’ eyed,” Hagrid greeted as you and Eleanor met him downstairs by the bar. “Excited fer ya trip to Hogwarts, I reckon?”
“We’re so pumped,” you beamed, nodding in thanks as Hagrid bent to pick up your luggage with ease.
“Is the Hogwarts Express as beautiful as everyone says, Hagrid?” Eleanor asked. The both of you followed the large man out of the door, waving goodbye to a sleepy-looking Tom that was wiping the bar.
“Oh, she’s a beaut,” he said with a smile in his voice. “Had a bit o’ trouble fittin’ in th’ compartments after me firs’ year, but lots o’ good mem’ries on tha’ train.”
Kings Cross Station wasn’t a long walk from the Leaky Cauldron, considering Hagrid’s knowledge of some shortcuts not far from Diagon Alley. It was hard to keep up with his enormous strides, though. In no time, you all were walking into the sunlit and busy station, surrounded by bustling men and women on their morning commute. Many were staring at Hagrid, equally in awe and frightened.
“Now, yer gonna find Platform 9 ¾,” Hagrid told the two of you, leaning down to place your luggage at your feet. “You’ll know wha’ to do. Reckon you’ll see sum other students goin’ through.”
“Thank you so much, Hagrid,” you grinned, briefly squeezing his enormous arm. He smiled back kindly through the bushy beard.
“You rock, Hagrid,” Eleanor said. Hagrid tried not to beam, swatting his garbage lid-sized hand in modesty.
“It’s nothin’,” he grumbled. “I’ll see ya at Hogwarts, yeah?”
“See you later!”
Hagrid waved goodbye and turned, his long strides carrying him away from you in seconds flat.
“Hope everyone at Hogwarts is as nice as Hagrid,” you told Eleanor, turning to her and pulling out the Hogwarts Express ticket from your pocket. Platform 9 ¾ shined back at you in metallic gold lettering.
“Well, let’s get a luggage cart then try to find this weird-ass platform,” Eleanor sighed, picking up her luggage with a huff. You did the same, the two of you waddling towards a group of empty carts beside a nearby barrier. After loading all of your trunks, the two of you began searching for the magical barrier in the midst of all of the normal ones.
“I’m so glad that Cinna will be at the castle when we get there,” you mentioned absentmindedly. “She’d be hooting like crazy with all of this traveling.”
“Same with Bebe,” Eleanor agreed. Bebe was her black cat with piercing green eyes and a very fluffy tail. “She would be throwing a fit and attracting all kinds of unwanted attention.”
You stopped abruptly, throwing out an arm to stop Eleanor as well. Both of your trunks swayed dangerously on your luggage carts from the sudden motion.
“Hold on, there’s Platform 9,” you said, pointing toward the clearly numbered sign hanging from the brick barrier.
“And there’s 10,” your friend nodded, pointing as well. “Okay, now where’s ours?”
“Hagrid said we’d know what to do and to look for other students,” you said, almost to yourself. Your eyes darted around, looking for anyone that would stick out from the crowd. Wizards weren’t always the best at selecting inconspicuous No-Maj clothing.
“Let’s see who’s wearing something ridiculous,” Eleanor snorted, leaning on the handle of her cart and resting her chin in her hand. “Someone’s mom or dad is bound to be wearing a lime green fur coat or something.”
The two of you waited for a few minutes, watching the area around the barrier and nervously glancing at a nearby clock on the wall. It was drawing closer and closer to nine o’clock.
Just as you were beginning to worry that the two of you would miss the train, it happened. A group of girls that weren’t much older than you walked toward the platform, laughing at something casually. One leaned back against the brick between platforms 9 and 10, and boom, it happened. She disappeared through the wall. Each girl, in turns, subtly slipped out of sight, the surrounding No-Maj’s none the wiser.
“Thank goodness,” Eleanor sighed in relief.
The two of you approached the platform with caution, doing your best to remain inconspicuous. You’d learned after many years of living with your No-Maj mother that ordinary people tended to miss out on subtle magic even if it was happening right in front of them — because they weren’t looking for it.
You let Eleanor go first while you played lookout. She backed her cart against the barrier and leaned against it like the group of girls did. In a moment, she’d disappeared. You glanced around nervously, but no one had taken any notice. You breathed out a relieved sigh, then copied her movements exactly.
It felt like a warm, soft breeze as you sank through the brick. Suddenly, the station dematerialized and was replaced by a huge black steam engine and a bustling crowd of robe-clad witches and wizards. You grinned at Eleanor in excitement, looking up to see a red sign that read Platform 9 ¾ in slanted gold lettering. The platform was incredibly busy, filled with families hugging goodbye and the sound of rolling luggage and the hum of excited chatter.
“This is it,” you sighed dreamily. A huge smile broke over your face and Eleanor matched it. Your adventure to Hogwarts was officially beginning.
You and Eleanor rushed to the train in excitement, dragging your trunks along behind you. With a bit of difficulty, you both unloaded the carts and heaved your suitcases through the open door with the help of a station employee. Seeing your evident confusion, he told you in a thick Irish accent to take the trunk containing your school robes and to leave the rest with him.
The inside of the Hogwarts express was cozy, but not incredibly roomy, and you recalled Hagrid’s comment. You snorted at the mental image of the giant man trying to squeeze down the car hallway.
“Let’s find a compartment,” Eleanor whispered to you excitedly, grabbing your hand to pull you along. Her palm was sweaty and so was yours.
You both walked past many students in the train corridor, some looking at the two of you curiously. It was obvious that most of the students seemed familiar with who was in their year at this point, so two new faces that weren’t first years caught some attention. You heard some whispering as you passed, but none of it seemed unkind, at least that’s what you were hoping.
Some compartment doors were open, filled with chatting and laughing teenagers, others were closed. A few glanced curiously at you and Eleanor as you walked by and peered in.
“Is there not a single empty compartment on this train?” Eleanor complained, frustration seeping through her tone.
“Hey, maybe that’s a good thing,” you told her hopefully. “It’ll force us to talk to people, right? Maybe make some friends?”
“That’s all well and good,” she shrugged. “I was just kind of hoping we could avoid the staring for a while longer.”
You hummed in agreement. A few heads were poking out of compartments that the two of you had already passed, not bothering to hide their curious stares. You weren’t sure if you were flattered, uncomfortable, or a weird combination of both.
“I do feel a bit like a zoo animal,” you laughed uneasily.
“Damn it, Y/N, we should’ve looked less hot today,” Eleanor joked, lightly shoving your shoulder. “Now the Brits can’t keep their eyes off of us.”
You laughed aloud at her sarcasm.
“Are the two of you lost?”
You almost jumped in surprise at the unexpected voice coming from behind you. You turned to see a bushy-haired, proud-looking girl that was already in her Gryffindor robes with a shiny red badge pinned to her chest. A tall, freckled and red-headed boy stood behind her. He seemed a bit uneasy.
“Oh, hi,” you smiled, a bit surprised. “We’re just trying to find a compartment.”
The girl’s eyes lit up at your American accent, and the redhead suddenly seemed a lot more interested in the conversation.
“Are you two exchange students from Ilvermorny?” she practically gushed, clasping her hands together in excitement. You and Eleanor exchanged amused smiles.
“Yeah, that’s us,” you replied. “It’s that obvious, huh?”
“Well, the accent gives it away a bit,” the boy grinned, and the girl turned and lightly slapped his arm.
“I mean, it’s that obvious that we look lost?” you corrected yourself, laughing at his smart remark.
The girl smiled sympathetically. She reached out her hand. “I’m Hermione Granger, and this is Ronald Weasley. We’re Gryffindor prefects.”
Ron seemed to stand up a bit straighter at that and puffed out his chest. You and Eleanor each shook her hand in turn, introducing yourselves. Ron waved a bit awkwardly but not unkindly.
“So, what’s a prefect?” Eleanor asked curiously, pointing to the badges on their chests.
“We were chosen out of a select number of students in our year to guide our peers and help to uphold the rules,” Hermione stated proudly. “A boy and girl are chosen from each house. I’ve read about Ilvermorny, but couldn’t find anything about student guides.”
“In our fourth year, three students are chosen to help the younger kids with their studies and stuff,” you shrugged. “They’re a bit like glorified tutors, but I don’t know if that’s the same thing.”
Ron’s chest puffed out again, pride in his stance. “We do a bit more than that, I’d say.”
At Eleanor’s giggle, he seemed to remember that he needed to look cool and crossed his arms, leaning against the nearest compartment door as casually as he could. Hermione rolled her eyes at him.
“Well, we’re here to help,” she said, an excited glimmer in her brown eyes. “There’ll be prefects to help you two in whatever house you’re sorted. But you’re always welcome to come to one of us! I’d absolutely love to hear all about America’s magical education. Doesn’t that sound positively fascinating, Ron?”
He shrugged, not hiding his disinterest well. She was obviously a bookworm and he very obviously was not.
“Anyway, there are normally a few empty compartments toward the back of the train,” Hermione said, seeming to remember that you four were standing in the middle of the almost empty hallway.
“Awesome, thanks,” Eleanor smiled.
“I’d truly love to stay and chat, but we’re expected in the prefect’s carriage,” she sighed apologetically, and you had no doubt that she really was sorry to miss the chance to ask you as many questions as possible. “It was lovely to meet you.”
“You too,” you said, and stepped aside so that Hermione and Ron could walk toward the front of the train.
The floor lurched, almost knocking you and Eleanor off balance, and the steam engine whistled. The train was slowly beginning to move.
“Hogwarts, here we come,” Eleanor squealed, clapping her hands. The two of you hugged in excitement, ignoring a few of the people still sneaking peeks at you from their open compartment doors.
You and your friend practically skipped down toward the end of the train, taking Hermione’s advice and finally finding an empty compartment. With a great heave, you swung your luggage up to the top rack and removed your wand from one of the zippered pockets. You hadn’t done magic all summer and the itch was almost irresistible. Eleanor was obviously thinking the same thing, flicking her wand silently at a small magazine she’d pulled from her bag.
“Did you ever get the hang of non-verbal spells?” she asked, not taking her eyes off of the magazine that lay motionless on the bench beside you.
“Eh,” you said noncommittally. You were modest. “We learned it right before break, and most of the class didn’t get it anyway. I’m always a bit rusty when summer ends.”
“Same,” she muttered, flicking her wand relentlessly in repeating patterns. But the magazine still didn’t move.
You pulled a book out of your trunk: Hogwarts, a History: The Revised Edition. You wanted to learn as much about the school as you possibly could before you got there. Not only would the knowledge make navigating the castle a bit easier, but you could almost feel your father inside of the pages. With every new experience, like meeting Hagrid, staying in the Leady Cauldron, and boarding the train, you felt closer and closer to him.
“Oh, shit!”
Eleanor’s scream made you jump, and you realized with a whiff of smoke that the magazine had burst into flames. You bolted out of your seat and quickly drew your wand.
“Aguamenti!” you exclaimed. Water rushed from your wand tip and extinguished the burning pages. You both were panting as you turned your irritated gaze to her. She grinned sheepishly.
“Told you I was rusty…”
“Were you trying to catch it on fire?” you questioned, adrenaline starting to retreat. Your heart was still pounding.
“Um, no,” she practically whispered. “I was trying to freeze it.”
You snorted, holding back a laugh. “Keep that up and you won’t end up in Ravenclaw.”
“I’m just nervous! Horned Serpent won’t let me down. I’m sure the Sorting Hat will see that.”
She waited for you to agree, craving your confirmation. You smiled at her, understanding her nerves. You were not-so-secretly terrified that the hat wouldn’t be able to sort you at all.
“Of course it will be able to tell,” you said kindly, and Eleanor let out a breath she’d been holding.
Determined to help her with her uneasiness, the two of you practiced simple non-verbal spells for the next forty minutes or so. When you froze a magazine page on your first try, Eleanor seemed to deflate. You then purposefully messed up on every attempt until she successfully covered a page in ice. She pumped a fist into the air, overjoyed. You smiled.
Then your compartment door slid open, revealing the bushy-haired prefect.
“Hello,” she smiled. “Our prefect meeting just finished. Would you like to join us in our compartment?”
“Yeah, that sounds great,” you grinned, thankful that a kind student was already taking you and Eleanor under their wing.
The two of you pulled your belongings down from the racks above your seats and followed Hermione down the hallway. The compartment was only a few paces away from yours.
She slid open the door and walked inside, reaching to help Eleanor slide her trunk onto the overhead shelf. A boy with dark, somewhat messy hair and glasses looked up in surprise. He was sitting across from Ron, the redhead that you’d met earlier. Ron greeted you with a short wave, whispering something quickly to the raven-haired boy.
“Don’t be rude, introduce yourself,” Hermione scolded. She sounded like a disappointed mother.
“Oh, yeah, sorry,” the green-eyed boy muttered. He stood and stuck out his hand, albeit awkwardly. “I’m Harry.”
“Hi, I’m Y/N,” you smiled, shaking his hand. It was calloused, but warm.
“Eleanor,” your friend said, shaking his hand as well.
“They’re exchange students from Ilvermorny,” Hermione gushed, sitting down beside Ron. You sat down on the opposite bench next to Harry, then Eleanor sat beside you. “Isn’t that so exciting?”
Harry looked mildly confused. “Ilvermorny?”
“Ilvermorny School of Witchcraft and Wizardry,” Hermione said, waiting for him to catch on. He didn’t. “It’s the magical school in America,” she explained, looking a bit put out that he didn’t know this. “Honestly, Harry, we learned about other wizarding schools from Professor McGonagall last term, remember? After Christmas she posted the I.W.S.E.P. signup sheet in the common room.”
“I was a bit distracted with the tournament last year,” Harry said, a bit defensive because of her gaze.
Hermione sighed, suddenly looking sad. She looked to Ron expectantly. “You remember, don’t you, Ronald?”
Ron grinned uneasily. “Sure, yeah. Good ole I.W.S.E.P.”
“What does I.W.S.E.P. stand for, Ron?” she asked flatly.
“Uh… well, International, uh, Witch… Witch Switching Event—?”
“Honestly! Just admit you didn’t listen either, Ron!”
“It’s not a big deal,” you cut in, grinning uneasily. “Most of my house didn’t listen either. A lot of the students who ended up doing the exchange program already knew about it way beforehand. I’d decided I was going by my third year.”
Hermione was suddenly very interested in what you had to say, and Ron shot you a thankful look. You could see that Harry was doing his very best not to laugh at Ron.
“Tell us all about your school!” Hermione squealed, scooting to the edge of her seat and resting her chin in her hands. She reminded you of a small child watching their favorite television program. “What’s it like? I’ve read all about the sorting process, it is absolutely fascinating. And that you don’t receive your wand until after your sorting ceremony?”
“Wow, you know a lot about it,” Eleanor said, mildly impressed.
“Hermione knows loads,” Ron interjected. Hermione tried to hide her flattered grin, but the slight flush of her cheeks betrayed her.
Harry was looking out the window, his brow furrowed. His mind was obviously elsewhere.
“Well,” you began, looking away from Harry and back to Hermione and Ron, “Ilvermorny is modeled after Hogwarts, ya know, so not too much is different.”
“Oooh, yes, I read about that too,” Hermione nodded. “The founder, Isolt Sayre, dreamed of going to Hogwarts in her childhood, didn’t she?”
“Yeah,” you smiled, “that’s why one of our uniform colors is blue. She wanted to be a Ravenclaw.”
“Same,” Eleanor sighed. Hermione grinned at her.
“Are you academically inclined?” she asked Eleanor.
“I’d like to think so,” Eleanor shrugged. “I’ve just heard that my house, Horned Serpent, and Ravenclaw are kind of alike. I’ll be happy no matter what house I’m sorted into, but I think Ravenclaw may feel a bit more like home.”
“I was almost sorted in Ravenclaw,” Hermione said, and you weren’t surprised.
“Really? Then why are you in Gryffindor?” Eleanor asked, scooting to the edge of her seat too.
“I chose it,” she said simply. “Books and cleverness are important, of course, but there are more important things.”
“So, the Sorting Hat will let you choose your house?” you asked quickly. Hermione noticed the desperate twinge in your tone.
“Well,” she said gently, “to a degree. But only if you truly belong there.”
You sighed. Hermione looked at Eleanor questioningly.
“She’s nervous that she won’t be sorted,” Eleanor explained, rolling her eyes but squeezing your arm.
“Everyone gets sorted,” Ron assured, certainty lacing his tone. “My whole family’s been in Gryffindor, I remember as a First Year being terrified that I was gonna end up in another house. But it all works out, doesn’t it?”
“Why are you afraid that you won’t be sorted?” Hermione asked curiously.
You shrugged, tucking your hair behind your ear shyly. You never enjoyed talking about this, afraid that you’d come off as bragging.
“Well, this thing happens at Ilvermorny sometimes, during the sorting ceremony,” you began hesitantly. Harry turned his head towards you, the conversation catching his interest. “It doesn’t happen super often…”
“Like, once every decade or two,” Eleanor added. You blushed a bit.
“More than one house can choose you,” you explained, wringing your hands together. “The houses show that they want you when their wooden statues come to life. You stand in the middle of the circle and the whole school is watching from the side and the balconies above.”
“Do you have four houses like we do?” asked Ron.
“Yeah,” you nodded. “Horned Serpent, Pukwudgie, Thunderbird, and Wampus.”
“What happens if more than one house chooses you?” Harry asked. Hermione seemed glad that he was taking part in the conversation, relieved even. You wondered why.
You turned to Harry. “If more than one house chooses you, then the student gets to choose where they want to go.”
“A bit like the Sorting Hat,” Hermione added. “So, what happens once every ten years?”
“It’s not uncommon for more than one house to choose a student,” Eleanor said, “but it only happens once every few years that three houses will show interest. Even rarer that all four want someone.”
“All four wanted me,” you said quietly, a bit embarrassed by the attention. Ron’s eyebrows shot up and Hermione seemed very impressed. Harry seemed impressed as well, exchanging a loaded glance with Ron.
“Imagine the Sorting Hat announcing that it can’t decide,” Ron said to Harry, laughing in disbelief. “Can you imagine? I think McGonagall’s head would explode.”
“Has that ever happened?” you asked worriedly. “I mean, what if the Sorting Hat doesn’t know where to put me?”
“It’s never failed to sort a student in Hogwarts’ history,” Hermione assured you, putting a comforting hand on yours before pulling it away. “I’m quite certain it would just allow you to choose.”
You sighed.
“What house did you go with?” Harry asked you.
“Thunderbird,” you answered, a smile creeping onto your face. You were proud of your house.
“And what kind of person goes to Thunderbird?” asked Ron.
“Well, it’s said that Thunderbird leans toward adventurers and represents the soul.”
“The soul?” asked Harry, brows pulling together.
“The houses at Ilvermorny aren’t exactly like Hogwarts,” Eleanor explained, biting her lip as she thought. “I’m not sure how to explain it. Ilvermorny houses are said to represent parts of a human being. Horned Serpent usually leans toward scholars, so it represents the mind. Wampus leans toward warriors, so the body. Thunderbird favors adventurers, so the soul. And Pukwudgie favors healers, so people who lead with their heart.”
“It’s such an interesting take on things, don’t you think?” Hermione said dreamily to no one in particular. She was like a sponge, soaking up every word that came out of your mouths.
“Why did you go with Thunderbird?” asked Harry.
“People ask me that a lot,” you smiled. “What I told Eleanor is… I guess I see the soul as the root of everything? I mean, it all goes back to that. When we’re born, when we die, our souls are who we are at the most fundamental level. They last long after we leave this earth.”
Harry sighed, nodding almost imperceptibly. His eyes were filled with some sort of pain that he was making an effort to hide. Ron and Hermione watched him, concerned.
“I think that’s a lovely sentiment,” Hermione said to you, “that souls are the beginning and never-ending. That the people we care about never really leave us after they die.”
You smiled, your father’s joyful face flitting through your mind. “Yeah. That’s actually one of the reasons I wanted to come to Hogwarts. My dad was a student here.”
“Blimey, really?” Ron laughed. “Knew you weren’t so bad, you’ve got a bit of Brit in you.”
You rolled your eyes and laughed, Hermione turning to Ron and slapping his arm again. You gathered that this was a common occurrence between the two.
“He was in Hufflepuff,” you said.
“Oh, Gryffindors get along swimmingly with Hufflepuffs,” Hermione chirped. “We normally have a few classes together every term.”
“Bet your dad’s rooting for you to get sorted into Hufflepuff, yeah?” Ron questioned.
Eleanor looked down at her shoes, clearing her throat uncomfortably. You bit your lip and Hermione seemed to instantly detect that something was wrong. Ron, of course, was oblivious.
“Uh, actually, he died a few years ago,” you said quietly. Harry turned to look at you, understanding in his green eyes.
“Oh, damn. Sorry,” Ron mumbled, avoiding your eyes.
“No, you’re fine, Ron,” you said quickly. “It’s not like it’s a taboo subject or anything. I just don’t talk about it much is all.” You shrugged halfheartedly. “I should probably get used to talking about it more anyway, I guess, now that I’ll be at a new school where my dad used to go. I’m just hoping to, I don’t know, get closer to his memory somehow? I know it sounds stupid.”
“It’s not stupid at all,” Harry said quickly. You were a bit surprised by the intensity of his tone. “When I hear things from the professors about my mum, or see a Quidditch trophy that my dad won, I can feel it. Like I’m getting a glimpse at them.”
Ron and Hermione exchanged sad glances. You didn’t miss the gloomy air that the three were giving off.
“Your parents…?” you asked quietly.
“Are dead, yeah,” he answered. He ran a hand through his dark hair, and then you saw it. With an audible gasp, you didn’t understand why you didn’t realize it before. He’d introduced himself as Harry, after all.
“You’re – oh, I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize,” you stammered, “… that was a stupid question, I shouldn’t have asked. I just didn’t know who—who you were.”
Eleanor seemed confused, then her eyes fell upon the lightening scar that was no longer hidden underneath his dark hair. Her mouth dropped open quite unabashedly.
“It’s alright,” Harry shrugged. “It was actually sort of nice, meeting people who didn’t instantly know who I was.”
“Well, uh, it’s cool to meet you,” you said awkwardly.
“Uh, yeah! Like, beyond cool,” Eleanor grinned behind you.
You couldn’t believe this whole time that you were discussing worries as silly as sorting to The Boy Who Lived, the boy who, as a baby, defeated You-Know-Who and survived the Killing Curse. Your problems and fears must seem so small and trivial to him.
Harry offered an awkward but understanding smile. You realized that he must deal with this reaction every time he met someone new. It must’ve been exhausting.
Just then, the compartment door flew open with an unpleasant bang. In strutted two large boys that reminded you of stunted gorillas, following a familiar handsome face and perfectly styled light blonde hair. The atmosphere of the compartment poisoned; you could feel the instant shift in the air. Your three new friends were glaring at Draco Malfoy with all of the hatred and disgust they could possibly muster. You exchanged a glance of recognition with Eleanor, the two of you sinking back into your seats to avoid whatever confrontation was obviously coming.
“Potter,” Draco spat, the name rolling off his tongue like a curse, “just thought I’d drop by to show you this.” He stood up straighter in his fitted black suit, a green prefect pin glinting on his chest. “Someone needs to remind you of your superiors.”
“Big whoop, Malfoy, we’re prefects too,” Ron spat back, pointing to the pin on his chest. Malfoy sneered.
“Obvious lack of judgement, Weaselby,” he smirked. His grey eyes pierced through Hermione, his nose wrinkling in disgust. “If they allow mudbloods to be prefects now, then what’s a blood traitor?”
You and Eleanor gasped at his use of the slur. Even then, he didn’t seem to notice the two of you, too intent on causing chaos.
“And what does that say about you, Potter?” he smirked nastily. “That they get chosen as prefects over you? Not Dumbledore’s little golden boy anymore, are you?”
Draco’s cronies laughed behind him, fueling his ever-deepening smirk.
Harry shot up from his seat, rage radiating off of him in waves that were almost visible. This was obviously what Malfoy came for. His face was twisting into a superior smile. Harry’s wand was clutched in his shaking fist.
“At least my father’s not a cruel, murdering, prejudiced piece of—”
“Harry, he’s not worth it,” Hermione begged, standing to grab Harry’s arm and pull him back.
“Keep my father’s name out of your mouth, Potter,” Draco threatened. He stepped closer to Harry as Hermione continued to attempt to pull her friend back with little success. Harry’s grip tightened on his wand so much that his fingers turned white, causing a few sparks to fly out of the tip. Malfoy’s cronies were beginning to crack their knuckles in anticipation.
You weren’t sure when you decided to do this, or why in the hell you thought it was a good idea, but you suddenly stood. Malfoy and his bodyguards finally seemed to realize that there were two other people in the compartment. Recognition flitted across his face, and you knew that he recognized you from the day before in Madam Malkin’s.
“I could be wrong, but I don’t think anyone in this compartment gives two damns that you’re a prefect, Draco,” you snapped, a confidence in your voice that you certainly weren’t feeling. Harry, Ron, and Hermione gaped at you in shock, both surprised by your involvement and the fact that you even knew who Malfoy was.
Draco was taken off guard, but quickly recovered.
“I heard whispers of Americans on the train,” he said unkindly, eyes glinting but holding the slightest bit of fascination. “I suppose Hogwarts is officially scraping the bottom of the bin nowadays.”
Anger curdled in your stomach and boiled in your blood. You could easily see why Harry was so quick to anger the moment Malfoy stepped into the compartment—he was getting under your skin, too.
“Well, I guess they are if you’re here,” you said, crossing your arms, “and named a prefect no less? They’re obviously lowering their standards. I mean, damn, I just met you and I already think you’re a waste of space.”
Ron snorted behind you, not bothering to hold back his laugh. Hermione even had to slap a hand over her mouth not to giggle. Draco’s scowl was venomous, far more intimidating than the one he’d given you in the robe shop when you’d called him an asshole.
“I’d be careful if I were you,” he said, dangerously quiet. His blue-grey eyes drilled into you, and the most conflicting sensation of butterflies and hatred trickled from your stomach to your toes. “Already associating with mudbloods and blood traitors before you even hit the grounds? Pity.”
“Ya know, I really don’t like that word,” you said, sickeningly sweet. Your wand was at Malfoy’s throat before anyone could react, and Draco’s cronies didn’t seem to know what to do. They drew their wands and pointed them at you, looking at each other with confusion.
Draco’s surprised eyes were locked with yours, his chin tilted up and his Adam’s apple bobbing with a nervous gulp. He was doing his best to act tough, but you could tell that he was uneasy. He didn’t know you and didn’t know what you were capable of. He had been banking on a fight with Harry, not on a fight with you.
“Nah ah ah,” you smiled, shaking your head at the drawn wands of the gorillas flanking him. You pointedly twisted the tip of your wand into Draco’s neck a bit – not enough to hurt him, of course, but enough to make your point. “I’ll hex him before you can even open your mouths.”
They exchanged fearful glances again, their wands wavering. Draco didn’t dare turn his head to look at them, but seethed through his teeth, “Lower your wands, you morons!”
They did as they were told, and you smiled at them. “That’s better.”
Harry, Ron, and Hermione didn’t seem to know what to do either, but their faces were filled with gleeful astonishment. Eleanor was staring at you in awe. You didn’t blame her; you weren’t one to get into fights at Ilvermorny. Actually, you’d never been in a fight; you’d never done anything like this. But the adrenaline rushing through your veins was a heady combination when it mixed with the butterflies dancing in your gut.
“You know what my specialty is, Draco?” you asked, tapping your wand teasingly against his Adam’s apple. He gulped again and closed his eyes, breathing loudly through his nose. “I’m pretty good with non-verbal spells. You’d never know what was coming.”
He nervously licked his lips and stared back down at you, eyes filled with distaste, anger, and something else that you couldn’t quite place.
“And non-verbal as in, ya know, making you non-verbal,” you added with a smirk reminiscent of his own, pressing the tip of your wand into the side of his neck. Again, not enough to hurt him, but enough to make his heart race. Yours was racing too.
You had no idea where this surge of confidence was coming from, but you sure as hell weren’t stopping now.
“If I hear that nasty, disgusting word come out of your mouth again… well, you won’t be saying anything for a while,” you whispered sweetly. Draco’s clenched jaw, the vein popping out of his neck, his furrowed brows and gaze so intense that you couldn’t distinguish between the adrenaline and the butterflies anymore – you realized with overwhelming shame just how hot you thought he was.
You hated yourself.
“You’ll regret this,” he whispered venomously, meant for your ears only.
“Will I really?” you asked, tapping the wand against his throat again. He squeezed his eyes shut, waiting for your wordless hex. You stood there for a moment, anticipation building, letting him think that you were going to do it. Then, with a satisfied laugh, you lowered your wand and stepped back. You’d never planned on hexing him, not really, but you wanted him to know that you could, at any moment, without any incantation to warn him.
Draco’s eyes popped open, feeling the sudden loss of contact. He let out a breath that he didn’t realize he was holding, reaching up to rub at his neck. He eyes darted around the compartment, taking in the smug faces of the Gryffindors and the confused faces of his cronies. With intense anger, he realized just how embarrassed he was.
“You better watch your back, Potter!” he spat, pointing a pale finger at Harry’s amused face. “Your luck is running out. He’s got plans for you. He’s going to kill you, just like your boyfriend.”
Harry’s face darkened. Then Draco’s furious eyes darted to you.
“And you,” he whispered spitefully, “you’ll regret ever leaving your backwoods trailer!”
You had no doubt that he meant it, but you hid your apprehension at his words, only raising a skeptical eyebrow at him.
With that, he stomped off down the hall, tailed closely by his muddled friends. You could hear him cursing the whole way.
“Y/N!” Eleanor breathed in disbelief, gripping your arm like a vice and dragging you down to the seat beside her. “What the actual fuck was that? I mean, don’t get me wrong, it was pretty awesome—but what the fuck?!”
“That was bloody brilliant!” Ron exclaimed, practically jumping out of his seat in joy. “Will you marry me?”
You all busted into laughter.
“Malfoy might have it out for you even more than Harry,” Hermione giggled, but there was an air of uneasiness. “Not that I don’t think you’re capable of defending yourself, but are you sure that was clever? He’ll be out for blood now.”
“Come on, Hermione,” Ron rolled his eyes, “you’re ruining the moment!”
“Yeah, take the victory, Hermione,” Harry agreed with a grin.
                     ________________________
Thirty minutes later, Harry grabbed a silvery-looking cloak from his trunk, tucking it under his arms and murmuring something about returning in a few minutes. You didn’t think anything of it, but Ron and Hermione seemed a bit skeptical and irritated by the action.
The rest of the train ride was peppered with questions about Hogwarts and Ilvermorny, funny quips about what happened with Malfoy, and a delicious helping of sweets from the friendly trolley witch. Harry never returned.
You hadn’t realized just how much time had passed when Hermione stood up and stretched, instructing Ron to change into his robes. They needed to go back to the prefect carriage toward the front of the train before arrival, she explained. She recommended that you and Eleanor change into your school robes as well.
The Hogwarts Express pulled into a small wizarding village called Hogsmeade at dark, just as you finished adjusting your new robes and helping Eleanor fix her hair. You could hear the chuga-chuga of the wheels slow, and the train lurch as it came to a full stop. Compartment doors were banging open and students were talking, laughing, and running down the hallways as they trickled out of the train.
You and Eleanor grabbed your luggage, stuffed your wands into the pocket of your robes, and set out into the night. The enormous castle loomed before you, quite visible from the village. The lit windows winked at you against the backdrop of the inky night sky.
“It’s Hogwarts,” Eleanor whispered in awe.
You were content.
[ Read Part 4 here ]
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tsuki-chibi · 3 years ago
Text
Ladrien June Day 3 - Squall: Trust Fall
This story is a sequel to my Marinette March, Adrinette April, and Marichat May stories; I highly recommend reading those first.
You can also read this story on AO3: Squall
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Adrien walked slowly up to the spot where the Dupain-Cheng bakery would be, gratified to see that it was, in fact, a bakery. He paused for a moment in front of the window to look inside. There was a bunch of customers clustered around the cash register and the display shelves. He could make out a few people working behind the counter, but he was too far away to be able to see who it was.
“Mm… that looks yummy,” Trixx whispered.
“Huh?” Adrien refocused, realizing that Trixx was looking covetously at the beautiful cake in the window. It was a wedding cake, lovingly decorated with a cascading spray of blue flowers on both sides. The little groom on top had either fallen over or had been posed in the middle of doing a trust fall, since the groom was leaning precariously against the bride figurine.
“I bet it tastes like blueberries,” Trixx said dreamily.
“Umm… maybe. You’re supposed to be hiding.” Adrien gently pushed the kwami back down and moved towards the door of the shop. A little bell jingled as he entered.
No one looked his way, which was exactly the way he liked it. One nice thing about an alternate universe was that he wasn’t a minor celebrity here in either his civilian form or in his transformed form. That kind of anonymity at least made it a lot easier to get around.
He inhaled deeply, taking in a frankly delicious array of cookies, cakes, and pastries. His stomach growled. Though he and Marinette had had a snack right before traveling through the portal, he hadn’t eaten too much, and he realized that he was hungry. That made him wonder just how much money he had on him. He’d stuffed a lot of things into his bag when leaving the Agreste mansion, but thankfully had his wallet in his pants.
He quickly stepped over to the side and pulled out his wallet, doing a quick count. There wasn’t a ton of money, but he had enough to be able to feed himself and Trixx for a couple of days. That was a relief. He didn’t know what he would’ve done if all he’d had were his cards, because it wasn’t like he had a bank account in this universe for said cards to be connected to.
“Try to figure out what you can afford?”
Adrien startled at the sudden voice, which was spoken right over his shoulder, and came within a hair of elbowing the girl right behind him in the face. He stopped himself just in time, while the girl stepped back with a shocked expression that instantly made him feel bad.
“I’m – I’m sorry,” Adrien said quickly. “I didn’t see you there.”
“Obviously.” She stared at him for a moment. Adrien took the chance to look her over too. She had dark hair just like Marinette, but it was much longer – almost to her waist and pulled back in a low ponytail. Her eyes were brown, and she had at least two inches of height on him.
Unless Marinette looked extremely different, this wasn’t her.
“What happened to your face?” she asked.
“My -?” Honestly, until that moment, Adrien had forgotten about his split lip and black eye. He touched his cheek and went for the obvious lie. “I do Fencing. Some days I’m a lot better at it than others.”
“Oh.” She smiled then. “That sucks. Did you come to the Dupain bakery to eat your pain away?”
The Dupain bakery?
Not Dupain-Cheng?
Adrien looked around instinctively and spotted some detailing on the nearest display case. In fine white lettering were the words ‘Dupain Bakery’.
He started to get the feeling that he wasn’t going to find Marinette.
“I’m Alice. Feel free to take a look around. When you figure out what you want, just let me know.” Alice smiled again and walked away towards another customer. Adrien unconsciously followed her, realizing that she was wearing a cute pink apron over a pair of jeans and a t-shirt.
Maybe Tom Dupain and Sabine Cheng weren’t even married in this universe.
That was a depressing thought.
He didn’t like the idea of being in a world where that was no Marinette.
But it wasn’t like he had a choice right now. There was no way to change universes until Marinette returned for him – and she wouldn’t be doing that until she had the Ladybug miraculous. Adrien didn’t want to disappoint her; he wanted to have the Black Cat miraculous in hand before that happened. So there was no point in quibbling over what universe he was temporarily in.
Trixx shifted restlessly in his pocket and Adrien nodded to himself. First stop: some food.
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