#Horns For Guys With Bee Boyfriends

[catsconflictscopicsandchamomile]

some ppl draw Deanmon w backwards-facing horns. some people draw forward-facing horns. or ram horns. or cartoon devil horns. but I know the truth. its obvious...

he's an Aquarius, isn't he?

[silver-tooth-the-panther]

Info Before I Start Writing

My FNF AU

I’m going to put down some information on the characters here for my FNF AU! I might call this the Billy Is Missing AU.

Boyfriend/Blake:

Species: Half-angel, Half-human.

Age: 19

Gender: Transmasc

Sexuality: Bisexual

Height: 7”2 (base height), 4”5 (Chibi/Preferred height.)

Attire/angel traits: normal white shirt with crossed out sign and jeans. He wears his usual cap, but he also has quite a few ear piercings and a nose piercing on the left side. Blake also wears a black hoodie with red sleeves and a red hood. He gets his wings near the end of the story (angels have to earn their wings). The feathers at the top are a navy blue. They turn lighter with each row of feathers. This angel luckily only has top surgery scars.

Personality: Blake is a very cheerful, yet sassy angel. He’s confident to the point of stupidity, but isn’t afraid to be emotional. Like canon, BF is both autistic and has ADHD (type 3). He’s nonverbal and prefers to communicate via his beeps and boops (which is one way for him to stim). When Blake does speak, it’s for a very important reason. He also stims by ruffling his feathers and cooing like a pigeon.

Nicknames: Bee (from Pico), blue, little angel.

Girlfriend/Gracie:

Species: Demon

Age: 19

Gender: Genderfluid (with a preference for she/her)

Sexuality: Pansexual

Height: 8”4 (base height), 4”7 (Chibi/preferred height.)

Attire/demon traits: She wears her usual minidress along with a leather jacket and her heels. Gracie has her parent’s purple skin tone near eyes and various other spots on her body. This also includes her horns, demon tail (which is in the shape of a heart), and pointed ears.

Personality: Kind and sassy, similar to Blake. Despite growing up in a rich family, she taught herself how to take care of herself so she could prove her parents that she could. GF has so much confidence in her boyfriend (that it turns into stupidity). She is very loving and stims via biting and chewing on a necklace that Blake got her.

Nicknames: Doll (from Pico), demon darling.

Pico

Species: Human

Age: 20

Gender: Cis male

Sexuality: Demisexual (takes a lot of trust for him)

Height: 4”6 (bro is tiny)

Attire: Pico wears his usual green turtleneck and brown pants. He also wears leather, fingerless gloss and he has a nose ring. Scars cover his arms and chest. Pico gets blinded in his left eye near the end of the story due to being scratched.

Personality: Pico has PTSD and schizophrenia due to the events of Pico’s School. He carries a lot of survivor’s guilt because of the incident and it was because of him that he and Blake originally broke up. Despite that, Blake still loves and cares for Pico, which the poor guy just can’t comprehend. He has a hard time opening up, but he does grow as a character as the story goes on.

Nicknames: Pitbull (from Blake), Bodyguard (from Gracie), Buster.

Billy/Yourself:

Species: Pure angel

Age: 24

Gender: Transmasc

Sexuality: Bisexual

Height: 7”2 (base/preferred height), 4”5 (Chibi height).

Attire/angel traits: He was a very similar attire to BF, but the white shirt is actually a hoodie with the same crossed out sign and red sleeves and hood. His clothes are covered in rips and tears. His wings were much darker than BF’s and even had some gray at the tips. Of course, they are nothing but nubs during the story (he ripped them off). Along with his top surgery scars, Billy has a lot of scratches and scars on his chest. He has the same piercings as Blake.

Personality: Billy is actually very emotionally intelligent. He can read a situation easily and can see how a person feels about it. Billy is also incredible with finances. This stems from the fact that he was an orphan who lived in an abandoned treehouse, so he had to fend for himself. When Herself passed, Billy fell into his depression and couldn’t bring himself to be social or take care of himself (thus looking as unkept as he is). Despite this, Billy is a very sweet angel who thinks of Blake as being his younger brother.

Nicknames: Silly Billy, Angel (from Pogo).

Hana/Herself:

Species: Pure Demon

Age: 24

Gender: Genderfluid (preference for she/her)

Sexuality: Pansexual

Height: 8”4 (base/preferred height), 4”7 (Chibi height).

Attire/demon traits: While she was alive, Hana wore a variety of red dresses. Her favorite was one that had black seams and wrist cuffs. She wore heels just like GF and often borrowed Billy’s black hoodie. She has a tail and horns like GF, but they’re red instead of purple.

Personality: She’s a very sweet demon. If it weren’t for her physical appearance, most people wouldn’t know she was a demon. Hana did get bullied as a kid since demons are looked down upon, so Pogo and Billy were her only two friends for the longest time. Out of the three, she’s the most innocent and naive since her parents are actually good parents.

Nicknames: Lily (from Billy), Sweetie, Sweetheart.

Pogo/Himself:

Species: Huntsman (this is a species designed to kill monsters. They are often mistaken for Anthros)

Age: 25

Gender: Cis male

Sexuality: Pansexual

Height: 8”7

Attire/Huntsman traits: Instead of a turtleneck, Pogo wears a green hoodie that has light and dark green stripes on the sleeves. He also wears torn up brown pants. Orange fur covers his dog-like legs and his tail is similar to that of a German Shepherd in shape. Pogo also wears fingerless gloves and has a black and white bandana around his neck. Unlike Pico, the right side of his head is shaved while the left side is styled similarly to Soft Pico. The only difference is that his hair covers his missing left eye. Similar to Silly Billy and Herself, shadows surround his eyes. Pogo’s teeth and claws are incredibly sharp. Scars cover his arms and chest, but they’re not from the incident. (He’s jacked as well.)

Personality: Pogo is a very sweet and carefree pup. He genuinely understands and tries to help people with their trauma (even though he neglects his own). Unfortunately, Pogo can also get very violent when need be. When he sees someone he loves being hurt, Pogo goes insane and viciously tears that person apart. This is out of his control though and is terrified of this state (which he calls “The Beast”). He’s afraid that it will hurt those he loves. However, it’s actually there to protect his loved ones.

Nicknames: Guard dog, Puppy (from Billy), Big Dog.

[muselixer]

dumb things my friends and I have said: 2023!

part four: october - december apologies ahead of time for length! feel free to change pronouns if need be. warning for foul and dirty language, suggestiveness, and capslock-implied yelling :)

"There's a monster crab rave at the bottom of the express way."

"Sexual liberation leads to bondage."

"Oh, so when the flowers hear the bees, they cum a little bit in their jeans?"

"You're not allowed to milk me, dude."

"YOUR SOUL'S BEEN KILLERED!"

"I use Notepad for object permanence."

"I hope Walgreens didn't have anything you were looking for. Bitch."

"Forgot about touching grass. Eat it. Eat the grass. Fucking eat the grass."

"Should I fuck around, or do you think I'd find out?"

"I think the cat's gonna do some shit."

"WE NEED MORE SPEED! CUT OFF YOUR DICK!"

"Memories are stored in the tits."

"I'm watching the fruitiest movie known to man. Megamind."

"I pity-fuck the guy and then he learns fourth level spells!"

"It's a sacred dark art I like to call 'scaring the hoes'."

"That made my pussy drop."

"I can't think after I finish."

"Who would've thought my canon event would be cancer."

"Life is a tornado, and I'm a cow for comedic effect."

"Don't ask me, I didn't take one. Ask the one who bote into it."

"Wipeout feels like a liminal space."

"I'M SUCKING YOUR FEET."

"Quick. Get Weird Al on the horn."

"I got fucking thigh-gapped in ARMA."

"SLING HIM, BOYS."

"Wait, did the 'bruh' button come back? UGGHHHH."

"You're gonna look at a depressed millennial and tell me they're NOT gonna be interested in a dilf? You're wrong."

"Oh, yeah, let me just drink grog like a thirteenth century pirate."

"Okay. We now have cock back."

"Oh, look, the bottoms are in the voice chat together."

"If you die in Ohio you die in real life."

"You're not the community boyfriend. You're the community bottom."

"The Amazon parking lot is an outdoor liminal space."

"Dick come out frame sixteen. That shit retractable."

"GET SEPSIS BITCH, THEN WE'LL TALK."

"There can only be one wittle guy in this house. AND IT'S ME."

"I know you're staring at his hand. You sicko."

"So for New Year's, instead of getting drunk, I ate a whole tub of dairy and gassed my wife out of the bed."

[little-bitty-froggy]

Cg(s)- Eddie Dear+Frank Frankly

Little(s) - Julie Joyful

Age- 5

It was a nice spring earning and Julie, Eddie, and Frank were outside in a nice flowery field catching or just watching bugs.

Frank and Eddie don't really get much time together due to Eddie being a mail man so they thought this would be the perfect time to hang out together. On the way there they met Julie skipping around and being her usual self. “HAY JULIE”. Eddie yelled crossing the street. “Hm”? Julie turned around to see her best friend Frank and his boyfriend. “Hiya fellas, whatcha doing”? “Oh, we're just going down to the flower field to look at some bugs and to catch up on things”. Frank said with a smile holding a small leather bag that he carries around for his books and notes. “OOOOO~ that sounds like a lata fun. Can I tag along”? “Sure why not”. Eddie giggled turning to his boyfriend. “Is that ok with you hun”? “Sure I don't see why not.” “YAAAAY~”!!! Julie jumped with joy as she ran over the boys.

—Time skip cause i’m too lazy——

They had made it to a big field of flowers of all different kinds, peonies, tulips, windflowers little rose bushes on the sides, etc. There were many different bugs to look at. Butterflies, bees, Beatles, spiders, etc.

Julie giggled as she ran threw the flower patches. “Guys look, these ones are orange and yellow too, just like my horns”. She said pointing at the tulips and then right back to her horns.

“It sure does”. Eddie gasped. “FRANK LOOK, this one's orange”. Eddie pointed to an orange and black butterfly. “Ooooo~ that's a mark butterfly”. Frank said looking very happy to be talking about his interests.

Meanwhile, Julie was in her own little world chasing the bugs and nationally falling over the ruts of an occasional tree here and there.

“Oof, dat one really hurt”. She quickly put her hands on her mouth and looked over at frank and Eddie laughing at each other in the distance. “Thank god they didn’t here dat”. She groaned (“i cant regress now, I’m with my friends right now. Ooo- but what will they say if they find out”). Everything was flooding her head till she started spacing out.

“Julie”? “Hay Juuuulieeeee, you ok”. “Hu, oh ya m fine”. Julie said trying not to sound so kiddish even thought thats her hole personality but today she was a little off. Her voice was a tad bit higher and she kinda slurred her words. “You sure cause we’ve been calling you for like two minutes now”? Frank sounded a bit worried. “Mhm, m fine, ima be ight back”. Julie then got up and started walking. She didn’t know where she was going, she just new she wanted to get away from the couple.

“Oof”. “Owy, owy, owy”! Julie cries, slowly turning into sobs. “JULIE”!!The boys cried out. “Are you ok”. Eddie says running over to the mentally younger. Julie is still sobbing uncontrollably. “Shh shh, hay everything’s gunna to be ok”. “M-m-m-m sowry”. Her sobs slowly turned into soft cries. “Theres no reason to be sorry, you just had a little accident, your ok, hehe”. Eddie reassures her. “M- what do you want me to do ki—oooh hehe”. Julie looks over at frank making grabby hands towards him. Frank gets down to her level.”are you little right now”. “Mhm” she blushes hiding her face from the two mentally older boys. ”Why didn’t you tell us”. “Cause is didn wan you to e weiwded out. I didn wan you to stwap bein m fwend”. Julie started to tear up. “I don’t know if you know this already but”. Julie looks up at Eddie. Eddie takes out a small stuffed bear and an orange,yellow,blue pacifier. “Im an age regressor too. Well a flip”. “Same here, and when where both small Howdy comes and takes care of us”. The two mentally boys looked over at Julie as she’s giggling ind stimming.

“Now, can we go catch buofwies”.

“Yes, yes, we can”.

Im so sorry that it took me so long.school has been tough cause i had a bunch of tests, but tysm for the request this was a lot of fun to make, especially with some of my headcanons.:)

[petitemistletoe]

Voyeur-Pt. 2

Pairing: Austin Butler!Elvis Presley x Reader

Warnings: angst for sure!! slowly approaching smut but nothing full on... yet 

Word Count: 1.8K

Elvis was drinking and playing cards with Henry as if he wasn’t harboring the secret that he was in love with you. 

“So! You gotta tell me all about your tour, EP! What’s it like?” Henry asked, looking at Elvis with sheer adoration and wonder. Elvis could tell that Henry was a little jealous, which made Elvis feeling a little better about his jealousy of Henry.

“Oh, I mean, just incredible. There’s no high like getting up on that stage and performing for all those fans. I am a very lucky guy.” Elvis said with an almost shy smile. 

“Oh EP, it’s good to have ya back!” Henry punched Elvis’s shoulder. 

“Henry! Have you seen my pink underwear? I can’t find it anywhere!” You yelled from the other room, storming into the living room where you unexpectedly found Henry and Elvis sipping beer and chatting. You felt your face get hot as you accidentally revealed some very personal information to your boyfriends best friend. 

“Sorry baby, haven’t seen ‘em.” Henry chuckled at your shocked expression, “you haven’t seen them have you, EP?” Henry howled with laughter. You let out an easy chuckle and slumped down so you were sitting in Henry’s lap. Elvis went white and took a long sip of his beer. If only you knew.

“So do you have any big projects coming up?” You asked, leaning forward. 

“I have a show down in Houston this weekend so I’ll be leavin’ in a few days. Say, why don’t you both come with me!” 

“Oh my! I’ve always wanted to go to Houston! I hear swimming in the gulf is just like taking a dip in the hot tub!” You grinned. Elvis’s heart began to swell in his chest. 

“Ah shit, I can’t. I gotta big presentation on Monday in Louisville, I’m leaving with the company on Saturday.” Henry swore. The balloon heart popped. “Say,” Henry began, “Why don’t you go with EP, baby? Seeing Houston has been a dream of yours for a while now. Don’t let me stand in the way.”

“Go…just me and Elvis?” You asked. Elvis was looking between you and Henry like a tennis match. 

“Why not? Elvis, you’ll take care of my girl won’t you? Keep her safe?” Henry looked at Elvis with a giant grin on his face. 

“I, uh, absolutely! I’ll even make sure we get a chance to go out to the gulf.” Elvis smiled. 

“Well, all right!” You clapped your hands, “My god! I need to go shopping and get a new dress and a swimming suit!” 

Elvis felt like his heart was in his throat the entire week leading up to the show. Knowing that he was going to get time alone with you was enough to make him nervous. He pulled up to your house in a cherry red Cadillac and honked the horn playfully a few times. You emerged in a mint green mini dress and an ostentatious pair of sunglasses. It looked like you had gotten your hair done and Henry was carrying a clearly brand new piece of luggage behind you. 

“Oh my god! This car is absolutely gorgeous! I feel like a real socialite!” You hopped into the Cadillac and pushed your sunglasses up onto your head. Elvis could see you were wearing gentle makeup that made you eyes look bigger and your lips fuller. Henry tossed your suitcase in the trunk of the car and leaned down near the window of the driver’s side.

“EP can I talk to you for a second?” Henry looked serious, which made Elvis nervous again. 

“Yeah, yeah. You got it. Why don’t you pick out the radio station, honey bee?” Elvis said before getting out of the car. 

“Listen, I just wanted to say that I’m real grateful that you’re taking my girl with you. It’s all she’s been able to talk about for days. I just…I know what’s it like when you’re on tour and I don’t want my girl to see any of that shit, you understand?” Henry had his hands jammed into the front pockets of his jeans and he was blushing fiercely. 

“Hey Hen,” Elvis clapped his friends shoulder, “I’ll treat her like she’s my own. I’ll make sure none of that happens, alright? I need a break anyway. It’s high time I have a nice show and just settle to bed after. It’s what my momma thinks happens anyway.” Elvis grinned. Henry released a relieved chuckle.

“Thanks EP. I love ya.” Henry smiled. Elvis got back in the car and Henry leaned over the passenger side window and kissed you goodbye. “Y’all have fun, okay! Take some good pictures for me, alright!” 

Elvis didn’t say anything until Henry was just a speck in the rearview mirror. You had taken your shoes off so your feet were up on the dash and you were scanning the radio stations for one that didn’t sound all staticky. You started laughing when found a station playing Hound Dog. You were singing together as you zoomed down the highway. 

The night of the concert, Elvis thought his heart was going to stop short when he saw you. You were wearing a black mini dress and a pair of white boots. He saw you clapping and dancing around in his peripheral as he performed and he felt like he had to focus on making sure he wasn’t hard while he was on stage. 

“Elvis you were amazing!” You said, jumping into his arms as he left the stage. 

“Thank you darling! I heard about a great barbecue place for dinner a little ways out if you’re hungry!” 

“Oh I’m starved!” 

“Alright then. We gotta go right now then. Before the girls mob the car.” Elvis grabbed you by the waist and you ran to the car as the crowd just started to break through from the doors of the venue. You saw the girls run after the bright caddy as Elvis peeled out of the lot and then floored it until the city roads turned to country roads. You could smell the scent of barbecued meat on the wind and you knew you were getting close.

“What are you feeling like? I heard this place has the best brisket, sausage, pulled pork.”

“Let’s get a little of everything! And some potato salad and macaroni salad and banana pudding!” You looked like you were on cloud nine, you felt like you were on cloud nine. You felt like those socialites you saw on TV. And you loved being around Elvis, you always had. He was Henry’s best friend so it was almost like he was your best friend. Seeing him perform felt otherworldly but so did sitting across from him in the tiny barbecue shop with sauce all over his face. Elvis had excused himself to the bathroom, so you were all alone at the table when a tall man in a black cowboy hat stalking over to you. You had a few beers, too many really, you weren’t that big of a drinker but being around Elvis was a whole different feeling and brought out a whole different side of you. 

“Hey cowgirl,” The man drawled. You giggled and stood up on the seat of the booth to take his hat and put it on your head. 

“Hey cowboy.”

“Can I buy you another drink, pretty lady? Looks like you’re running low on yours.” He said, squeezing into the booth bench next to you and twirling the empty beer bottle between his fingers. 

“Looks like I am. I like your accent.” You smiled, leaning in closer to him.

“I like yours.” He put his arm around you and leaned into you so your noses were nearly touching. The cowboy’s easy expression changed, however, as he was lifted and tossed from the seat. Elvis was standing over the cowboy.

“This lady has a man,” Elvis seethed, “Get off of her.” Elvis grabbed your forearm and pulled you away and back to the car.

“Elvis…” You still had the cowboy hat on and you were feeling embarrassed. You were with Henry, you had no business flirting with a strange Texan-even if you were drunk. 

“I’m sorry, honey bee, I shouldn’t’ve left alone. I told Henry I’d keep you safe.” Elvis said quietly. You didn’t answer for a while, your head was still spinning from all the alcohol. You could smell however, the unmistakable smell of salt water. 

“Are you taking me to the gulf?” You broke into a grin. 

“I promised you I would,” Elvis said, his easy smile returning to his face. The car took a turn and the car pulled in smoothly to a sandy area that overlooked a large clear body of water. You leapt from the car, kicking your shoes and tearing your dress off before diving in the water. 

“Where ya going?” Elvis said, sound a little alarmed. 

“Swimming! You coming?” You floated on your back in the water and Elvis stared for a second before looking away. He felt the metaphorical devil and angel sitting on his shoulders. He thought for a moment, you were his best friend’s girl. But then he heard you giggle and he thought what the hell, tore the clothes off his body, and dove in after you. 

He paddled over until he was close to you in the water. You were laughing and you wrapped your arms around Elvis’s neck. 

“Thank you! I’ve never had more fun. I wish I could tour with you full time.” You batted your eyelashes at him. 

“Me too, honey bee. This has been my favorite show yet.” Elvis was wracking his brain, desperately trying to find a way to invite you on the tour. 

“Can’t believe I have to go back to work on Monday. I hate working at the McKinley.” You worked at the concierge desk at an extravagant hotel in downtown Memphis. 

“Say, why don’t you come and handle the accommodations for all our sets. I think that’s too big of a job for my daddy on top of all the manager stuff. I’ll talk to the colonel but I can pay you double whatever that silly little hotel is paying you!”

“Oh Elvis!” You kissed him excitedly. You back away and laughed again. “Aw god I really am drunk!”

Elvis had a small smile on his face as he watched you paddle towards the shore. 

[lonely-lost-soul]

Under The Floorboards pt. IIII

(Technoblade X Reader): Pt. I, Pt. II, Pt. III, Pt. IIII, Pt. V

Whipping the sweat off your brow you placed the honey jars you collected on the ground, Phil really built this farm efficiently. However, that didn’t stop you needing to collect honey pots here and there, now that the vault was complete you could actually use the honey for normal things. Technoblade would never admit it but he loved when you put honey in his tea, contrary to popular belief he wasn’t a fan of plain black tea or coffee. You rolled up your sleeves and adjusted the sunhat that sat lazily on your head against your better judgment you had left your armor inside. The only thing on your person was a netherite ax Techno had enchanted for you, it was an effective weapon but without your armor, you were a bit of a sitting duck. As the bees buzzed and bumped lazily into each other, you couldn’t help but smile fondly at the sight. They were just so silly. You picked up the crate of jars and turned around, your eyes narrowed as you saw some movement by the trees, it was still too early for Tommy and Technoblade to be back...so just who was snooping around the property. You felt very naked in your sun hat and overalls, especially if it was Dream himself that you were about to encounter. Your worry only increased as you noticed four men all in netherite armor walking towards the house, their swords were drawn. You had a feeling that these were the men who took Technoblade the day prior. They were like a little gang all dressed the same way, bloody aprons and all they really had the executioner vibes down. 

    “Hello, gentlemen.” You smiled giving them a wave while you adjusted the box of honey, “beautiful day isn’t it?” 

The first to answer was a man who had a scar from the tip of his eyebrow down to the bottom of his lip. He sent you a smile and you noticed a tooth missing from the upper row, a navy blue beanie held his dark hair in place. 

    “Very beautiful, it’s always a good day when the sun is shining.” He mused the sun in question reflected beautifully across all their netherite armor. The one thing you decided to leave inside, you weren’t intimidated nope not at all. “What’s your name sweetheart?”

    “(Y/N).” You responded with a hum, “Is there something that I can help you all with today?” Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed two of the men moved to surround you, they thought they were slick. The only one who didn’t move was the tallest of the children there, he looked to be half Enderman. He also looked like he wanted to be anywhere but where he was right now poor thing. Drawing your gaze back to the other three men, you noticed one was Tommy’s age and had small horns atop his head, along with goat-like ears. A burn scar also took up half of his face. It made you frown distastefully, what was with these kids getting traumatized? First Tommy and now the half enderman and the goat kid, you couldn’t adopt all of them, well you could but it’d be a lot of work. The other looked to be part fox after all the big orange ears and the fluffy tail was dead give away, wait didn’t Ghostbur say his son was a fox. “Are you Fundy?” You asked, suddenly tilting your head to the side.

    “How do you know my name?” Fundy’s face flushed a little and he shuffled on his feet, his hand twitching to grab the sword that was at his side. 

    “I talked to your father earlier today. I’m assuming that’s how you found me?” You took the hat off your head and rested it on Carl’s stable. The fox gave a reluctant nod of confirmation you licked your lips and put your hands behind your back. “So? Do you have a problem with Technoblade or just me specifically?”

    “Wow, she’s not even a little bit ashamed.” Quackity mused and you frowned, “We’re here because your boyfriend blew up our country. He also disgraced our President right Tubbo? Don’t know if you’re aware of that or not but he escaped his punishment. So we intend to make him repent.” He walked towards you and you took a step away from him. 

    “That’s far enough thank you.” You held up your hand in hopes it would stop his trek towards you, Quackity did pause for a moment. He let out a chuckle and smiled. He thought your tough attitude was cute, but he was clearly mocking you. 

Jackass. 

    “Quackity maybe we should leave her be...she didn’t do anything.” The young goat kid murmured his ears flicking as he looked up at you. 

    “Quiet Tubbo. Let the adults speak,” Quackity snapped at him before clearing his throat and looking back at you. “Listen (Y/N) was it? We’re going to have to ask that you come with us. If you don’t we’ll have to take you by force.”

    “Wait, couldn't Technoblade have trained her?” The half enderman spoke holding up his finger in the air but no one seemed to pay him any attention. 

    “I guess force it is. Although the fight is a little unfair.” You took out your ax and twirled it in your hand, “Something tells me you don’t exactly like fair fights.” Fundy took a hesitant step backward not really wanting to lose a life for this of all things, but he pulled out his sword just in case. Clicking your tongue in distaste you sent a bloodthirsty smile their way, one that rivaled Technoblade, “Come at me.” 

Without hesitation, Quackity charged at you with his sword he didn’t aim to kill, just disarm or injure. You blocked the swing with the wooden part of your ax and spun around just in time to dodge an attack from Tubbo. You managed to elbow him in the back and he stumbled forward into Quackity, the man made a grunting sound before shoving Tubbo off of him and into the snow. Fundy moved next and managed to land a hit on the side of your arm, you hissed loudly glaring daggers at the fox. His ears pressed against his head and he let out a small whimper, “sorry!”

    “Don’t apologize to her!” Quackity groaned, “You guys are the worst gang ever.” He slapped his forehead as you readjusted your posture, “I have to do everything myself.” Quackity snarled charging at you again you sidestepped out of the way. As he stumbled trying to regain himself he knocked over the honey pots and they shattered against the ground. You swung your ax and managed to land a hit on him in the back of the legs, he let out a strangled yelp and fell on his face into the snow like Tubbo had done earlier. Yanking out the ax out of the leader of the gang blood splattered all over the ground and stained the snow. Little red beads dripped off the ax as you held it by your side, the man only let out another scream as it was torn out of him. 

    “Back. Off.” You repeated again baring your teeth with a hiss, “Turn around and go back to L’manburg and I won’t kill you. Got it.”  The ax was pointed at all of them, you saw the half enderman nod vigorously, 

    “Yes ma’am.” He nodded rapidly grabbing Tubbo and Fundy by the arm and pulled them back, the three of them watched as Quackity snarled and backed up to join them. You watched them cower and you dropped your ax on the ground so you could press the palm of your hand into the wound on your arm. You quickly turned and ran back into your home to collect bandages and fix yourself up, blood speckled the floor as you made your way into the bathroom. You tore off your overalls and shirt, washing out the wound before wrapping your arm in bandages. You didn’t know how long you stood there in front of the mirror but you looked worse for wear. 

Technoblade was going to lose his shit.

---

All Technoblade could think about on their way back to his retirement home, was you. He could only put up with Tommy for so many hours until he needed to talk to literally anyone else. He was ready to get your relaxing date night underway; he could already feel your fingers running through his hair braiding his as you went. He hummed fondly listening as the voices called him simp repeatedly, he didn’t mind this time considering he was when it came to you. 

    “That’s still cringe chat.” He murmured to himself as Tommy continued to scream about something in the background, “Yeah, yeah I love her.” He heard the chat flip their shit and he fondly chuckled, intermixed with their happy cries there was a distinct sound of ‘E’ as well as ‘nerd.’ He almost didn’t hear Tommy’s worried shouting. He frowned and rolled his eyes back into his skull, 

    “What Tommy?” 

    “Technoblade! Technoblade!” The teen bumped back into him, Technoblade grunted and looked down at him. He followed Tommy’s eyes and spotted the blood littered snow outside his house. Technoblade paused and his vision went red around the edges, his eyes stayed trained on the bloodstains as the voices began to roar within his skull. His head shot up and he saw the honey box spilled over on the ground, glass littered the snow, your hat hanging loosely on Carl’s old stable. 

     “T-Technoblade.” Tommy stuttered again looking up at the pig-man, seeing how glazed over his eyes looked. He swore steam was coming out of Technoblade’s nose and his hand drew out his pickaxe gripping it so tight his knuckles turned white. He felt his tusks grow in size and his face began to shift into his pig form. Tommy’s voice was drowned out by the flood that was the voices in his head: 

‘SHE’S GONE. THEY HAVE HER. KILL THEM ALL. BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD. WE DEMAND BLOOD. E. SAVE HER. YOU’RE A FAILURE. YOU DIDN’T PROTECT HER. SLAUGHTER ALL OF THEM. SHE DIDN’T DO ANYTHING WRONG. SHE NEVER HURT ANYBODY. YOU BROKE YOUR PROMISE. BLOOD. BLOOD. BLOOD. BLOOD.’ 

Technoblade took a step forward to which Tommy rapidly backed up in response. He’s never seen Techno this gone before, oh shit he has it bad for (Y/N). However, Tommy didn’t make a move to stop Technoblade; he didn’t want him to release that rage on him. Technoblade walked into the house, stepping on his glasses that fell off his face. He threw his door open with a loud slam, he needed potions and he needed a new sword. 

Whoever did this all their cannon lives were gone he’d make it long and torturous.

A soft voice broke him out of his stupor his entire body went rigid. 

    “Bubs…” He slowly turned around and came face to face with you, you looked so small, so delicate standing in the doorway. You were wearing your pajamas, soft blue with little sheep all over them. His ears twitched and his shoulders softened considerably seeing you standing safe in the doorway, however, he tensed again the minute he saw the bandages tied around your arm. Blood leaking through them, he growled eyes locking in on the spot as you made soft shushing sounds at him. 

‘SHE’S HURT. SHE’S ALIVE THOUGH. BUT SHE’S HURT, THEY NEED TO PAY. ATONE FOR WHAT THEY DID TO HER. BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD. SPILL THEIR BLOOD THEN MAKE OUT WITH HER. SHE’LL LOVE YOU MORE IF YOU DO. BLOOD. BLOOD. BLOOD.’

Technoblade jumped feeling her hand caress his cheek, “Bubs it’s alright I’m okay.” Your voice was smooth and soothing, his eyes dilated as you spoke to him. His face shifting back to normal as he breathed heavily through his nose, “See?” You brought his head down to rest against your chest, it looked uncomfortable the way that he was bending. However, he could feel your heart beating in your chest, he made a soft whimper and grabbed onto your shoulders his pink hair tickled your chin. You brought your hands up to run his fingers through his hair as he finally calmed down enough to ignore the voices for the time being. Right now they were just commenting on how nice and warm her hands were anyway.

    “What happened to you? There was blood everywhere I was so scared.” His voice broke a little bit as he pulled away from you. Your heart twisted painfully in your chest Technoblade had never looked so broken. 

    “The butcher squad came and attacked me. They wanted to use me to get to you but I fought them off just like you taught me.” You couldn’t help but smile proudly at him and he let out a disbelieving laugh. His hands moved from your shoulders to your back as he cradled you gently in his arms, you both stood there rocking back and forth together until Technoblade was satisfied. 

    “That’s my girl.” He finally murmured backing away from you, you flushed at the compliment. Whenever he called you that it made you flush all over, you let out a loud flustered whine and whacked him on the chest. Technoblade laughed at your flustered expression, it was a rare moment the tables were flipped like this and Technoblade was going to take full advantage of the situation. “Princess what’s with that look? Am I, thee Technoblade, making you flustered? I know I’m a lot to handle, I beat Dream once, I never die, I’m not homeless. Guess what?” 

    “What?” You couldn’t help but let out a giggle as he circles you eyeing you up and down. 

    “I’m single.” 

    “Oh really?” You cocked an eyebrow, “I thought you had a girlfriend.” You twirled your hair around your fingers and you felt his strong hands rest on your waist. 

    “Hm I don’t think so. You might need to refresh my memory,” Technoblade mused kissing your neck tenderly. 

    “Well she’s stunningly gorgeous, and tough as nails,” Your eyes fluttered closed as you leaned back against him. “She absolutely adores you and how protective you are of her, and how much of a gentle giant you are.” He made a noise of protest and rested his chin on the top of your head. You could tell he was pouting at you, 

    “See, not only is that super cringe but also factually incorrect. I am not a gentle giant, I just committed vast sums of minor terrorism and I also kill orphans so what would my girlfreind say to that huh?” He huffed clicking his tongue distastefully. 

    “She would say that you’re right but also she sees the way you take care of Carl, and how you put up with Tommy. You’re totally brothers. That makes you at least a little bit soft” 

    “Not brothers and I don’t like him.” 

    “Right sure,” You giggled a little and kissed his chin lightly. 

Technoblade let out an indignant sound before muttering, “Oh we should probably tell Tommy you aren’t kidnapped. Also discuss what to do about L’manburg now that they know you exist.” You blocked out that last part and made a beeline outside to find Tommy. The teenager in question was fumbling with his hands over by his cobblestone tower, you ran over to him and engulfed him in a hug. 

    “(Y/N)!” He shouted letting out a disbelieving laugh hugging you back with a childish smile. “You’re okay! Holy fuck I totally thought you were dead and shit! Technoblade was going fucking apeshit! His face went all pig like n’ shit totally thought he was gonna kill everyone for you! Not that I was worried.” He added quickly shoving you away crossing his arms. 

    “Of course you weren’t THE Tommy is never worried.” 

    “Yeah exactly Miss Blade you get me.” You smiled fondly at him and you ruffled his hair and he shouted at you to stop. You did so sensing Technoblade approach the both of you, Techno interlocked your hand with his own and squeezed it tightly. “You chill now Big T?” 

    “I’m always chill Tommy. Only nerds aren’t chill.” He mused with a scoff, “Hence why I always call you a nerd.” 

    “WHAT THE FUCK TECHNOBLADE! I AM ALWAYS CHILL! I’M THE CHILLEST MAN ALIVE I’LL HAVE YOU KNOW!” 

    “Stop shouting,” Technoblade groaned burying his face in your hair as you laughed fondly at their antics. Although L’manburg knew about your existence now, and although you knew Dream probably wasn’t too far behind in learning that knowledge either, you felt everything was going to be okay. 

All you needed was each other, Technoblde, Tommy, Phil and you. Together you four were gonna do great things, you just knew it.

~~~

I do plan on making another part because people seem to be enjoying this story a lot more than I originally thought when I first posted it. Which is amazing thank you for all the love and support! New stuff is also in the works, thanks again for reading and enjoying! Stay safe guys! 🥰✨

[s0merand0midi0t]

A few others shared their RWBY x FNF so I'm sharing my other idea (Yes it's gonna involve sonic.exe cause why not)

Friday night funkin': Team Rwby Tussle

General idea is this: Boyfriend and Girlfriend are in the kingdom of atlas *For safety reasons let's say Volume 7 ep 6-14 and the ENTIRETY of Volume 8 NEVER. HAPPENED. EVERRRRR....Okay? Okay. Okay? Okay. Back to the post* walking around casually looking for a place to eat , not really paying attention to their surroundings. As they're walking they just so happen to bump into team RWBY who was doing the exact same thing and then the dialogue starts.

*BGM*:

Dialogue *I know bf and gf don't have canonical names but for the sake of this. They will,alright?!*:

*Keith and Cherry are walking down town and talking to each other*

*cut to team RWBY who was also walking while ruby was talking*

R: So then I was like *Fake gunshot and fighting noise*

*The others laugh*

R: But that's not even the best of it! Then after that i-

*Ruby and Keith bump into each other*

R: Gah!

K: Ah!

*They both fall back*

Both: Ow!(Beep!)What the hell?!(Bop Beep Bo?!)

*Team WBY and Cherry look at the 2*

R: Yo! What-!

*Ruby looks up*

R: Oh geez. Sorry, I kinda got wrapped up in my stories again

C: Oh don't worry w-

C: Hang on...don't I recognize y'all?

*The team looked confused*

Blake: what do you mean?

*Keith got up and looked them*

K: Bee(Hey)...Beep Skedibo da bo!(Hey wait a second!)

K: *Clears throat* Aren't you 4...You're team RWBY right?!

*Everyone looked shocked*

Yang: You recognize us?!

C: Recognize?

C: We're big fans of you 4!

B: Really?

W: Huh...we have fans

*Keith Chuckles then gets an idea*

K: Hey since we've ran into each other.

K: Would you 4 be willing to do rap battle with me?

*they looked shocked*

W: Well

B: I dunno about that...

R: Oh come on guys! They're fans of ours!

R: Besides,this day's been booooriiiing! All we've been doing is walking around all day!

Y: Hmmm...she is right.

Y: Maybe a rap battle would liven things up a little!

W: Well I AM musically inclined

B: Ehhh...Alright you've convinced me.

*Ruby Smiles*

R: We accept your offer...uh..what's your name exactly?

K: The names "Keith .XML"!

R: Weird last name but alright *Ahem* We accept your offer Keith .XML!

R: Let's do this!

K: Yeah!

*End of dialogue*

Aaaand that's the dialogue!

I'd add more but I'm not typing out more scenes

MOD ITSELF NOW:

Week name:

RWBY Rumble

(Week 1)

Song list:

Ruby:

Red Rose

Petal burst

Weiss:

Reflection

Ice cold

Blake:

Shadows

Kitty claws

Yang:

(phase 1 Calm) Firecracker

(Phase 2 Angry) Solar flare

Gimmicks (Mod charts):

Ruby- Fast but predictable (Lane moves + SS and speeds up every time you miss and resets everytime you die)

Weiss- Summons can mess with your notes (Pull notes back or cover them)

Blake- Normal scroll speed but is unpredictable every time you lose (Can fake out her arrow placements)

Yang- (phase 1 calm) Double notes and some triple notes

(Phase 2 angry) either a note mechanic or dodge mechanic from ember celica

Cover songs:

Shotgun shell and Parasite (Entity/Agoti)- Yang

Worship and Prominade (MFM/Entity)- Weiss

HairBall and Headache (Kapi/Garcello)- Blake

TicTacFoe and Technicolor Tussle (Mangige matches/Indie Cross)- Ruby

Spectral and Ballistic(Vs Retrospecter/Whitty)- angry yang

Challenge-EDD (Fnf online)- Ruby feat. Cinder as Eduardo

Athazagoraphobia- Team RWBY V. Legion

AND MORE! (That I won't name)

Bonus songs:

Grimm- Salem

Bull horns- Adam

Sunbeam- Sun

NOW FOR THE SONIC.EXE PART!

Y'know how In FNFever they have 2 sections? One for normal songs and one for Halloween ones? It's that but it's a section for normal songs and a section for cover songs. The sonic.exe portion of the mod however is it's own separate mod.

I've got no new names for the specific songs, I've got some names for team rwby tho (Check out my Triple trouble team rwby post for info about that):

Blueflame yang- vol 5-6 Yang as fleetway

Miss B- vol 5-6 Blake as lord X

Yenk- Vol 1 yang as sanic

Fakerose- Vol 1 ruby as faker

Wess- vol 1 Weiss as sunky

Penny doll- vol 1-3 penny as tails doll

And more!

Mod references (in terms of remixes):

Arrowfunk

D-sides

B3

Neo

Corruption (not pibby)

Soft

Crystalized

Mad com

BG references:

Mods (like starlight mayhem, rising volume, madness combat)

Camp camp ref

RvB ref(which I've never seen)

Nomad of no where(Which I've also never seen)

There's more but let me know what y'all think.

[amyx2001]

Goliath's Requiem Asshole Trio Ships because I can

Edan x Raiden 

• Their dynamic is Stupid and Stupider. More specifically, Edan is losing braincells the longer he's around Raiden, who's been a moron since birth.

• Raiden is a total thief. He steals little trinkets he finds like pens, marbles, glitter, just about anything that's shiny and/or golden. Those things end up in Edan's possession as gifts from Raiden, and while he's gonna softly scold his boyfriend for stealing gifts for him, he's not about to just return them to their rightful owners! Nobody has to know about them!

• Raiden has actually only gotten caught once, and it wasn't even anything particularly valuable. He yoinked a doughnut that was kinda set aside in the box. Five minutes later Abrahm comes storming into his office asking about a missing boston cream filled doughnut when he sees exactly what Raiden and Edan were sharing. Bastard just about yeeted them out the door when he told them to go get him another.

• Edan tends to sneak into the schedule files and change up the patrol a little just so he can go on patrol with Raiden. So long as he doesn't leave any evidence, nobody can prove he did anything! Dovahcom knows exactly what he's doing but never says anything because he wants to see how long it'll take Abrahm to notice they've been scheduled to patrol together every day for the past several months. He still hasn't gotten it.

• Raiden is the kind of guy who would ramp a monster truck off a giant pile of dirt, and go sailing over several houses as he plays that little American idiot horn thing. Yk the BEE BER BRR BRR BRR BRR BER BER BEE BEE BER that thing. Edan is the guy wheezing with laughter while bolting after the monster truck to make sure he's okay. Yes this has, in fact, happened. Raiden was okay but the scolding he got from Abrahm was pretty bad.

•Idk why but I feel like Raiden orders the most over the top weird coffee at Starbucks that just doesn't surprise the barista much, meanwhile Edan just orders a normal black coffee with a blueberry shot and that's what completely confuses the barista because of how simple yet absurd it is.

• They both tend to be tasked with patrolling the facility where Doctor Trayte works, and Goliath is being held. Their two favorite pastimes are annoying the shit out of poor Goliath, and hiding tiny chicken toy things all around the lab. It's kind of a challenge to keep a straight face when they're patrolling the hallways and they can hear "WHY THE SHIT IS THERE A CHICKEN IN MY COFFEE CUP?!?!?!" from across the entire floor.

• Sometimes they'll watch Mal's experiments, be they on perfecting a new battery for the Biotides, or trying to rip the Iris from Goliath's skull with a goddamn drill. Edan keeps suggesting he use a bonesaw, Raiden goes "Try sticking a box firework in his skull, I wanna see what happens."

• They're evil little gay henchmen, I adore them. Solid 8.6/10

Mal x Edan 

• Mal is kinda not fond of most of the Smyths, but Edan? Honestly this little golden boy is cute and he doesn't mind having him around. His blue friend is another story.

• Meanwhile Edan is having gay awakening panic because the evil stoic hot scientist is flirting with him??? Is it genuine??? Is it a joke??? What do????? Raiden's just standing there like "FLIRT BACK. FOR GOD'S SAKE FLIRT BACK. EITHER IT'LL THROW HIM OFF ENOUGH FOR HIM TO STOP MESSING WITH YOU OR YOU'LL HAVE THE SEXY MURDEROUS SCIENCE MAN AS YOUR MAN."

• Finally Edan does flirt back and Mal absolutely wasn't expecting that. But it's a welcome surprise, and he asks Edan to join him for coffee. They've been together ever since.

• Every time a Smyth walks past Goliath's cell, one of his ether snakes hisses to scare them off. If it's Edan specifically, Mal starts hitting the button to electrocute Goliath and his snakes, going "FUCK OFF DON'T YOU HISS AT HIM HE'S MINE"

• Edan is the only person keeping Mal sane enough to not go buy a hundred different bottles of liquor and set up a whole bar in his lab. Edan is also the only reason he wants to set up a full liquor bar in the first place.

• Mal has everyone who's a lower rank than him and/or afraid of him refer to him strictly as Doctor Trayte, except Edan. Edan has the boyfriend privilege.

• Edan keeps volunteering to be the Smyth patrolling Mal's lab. Since all the others don't want to, Dovahcom lets him. He also keeps sending Raiden with him because Raiden wants to go so he gets an excuse to chill with his bestie and see him happily talking to Mal about the chemistry books he's been studying.

• Edan is generally the one who reminds Mal to take care of himself, and when they get off work he takes Mal to dinner at this nice little family diner. They may also go to the bar. And then the ice cream parlor. And then Mal's house. I can neither confirm nor deny.

• Mal runs off of coffee, he's engineered himself a stupidly strong blend and he drinks at least seven or eight mugs of it a day. Edan, meanwhile, doesn't drink more than a cup a day, and whenever Mal works late, he ends up with a precious, curly black and gold haired Smyth taking a nap with his head on Mal's shoulder. The scientist never wakes him, he just lets him sleep and runs his fingers through Edan's hair.

• Suave Science Bitch and Little Anxious Smyth, with the mandatory Dumbfuck Wingman Bestie. Very cute, 8/10

Mal x Edan x Raiden 

• Ough polycule of evil,, yems.

• Mal constantly has to deal with these idiotic Smyths keeping the hallways of his lab safe. He hates them. They talk too much. They're clingy and annoying. Neither one of them is remotely intelligent. If they stopped being tasked with patrolling his facility he could actually get some work done.

• ^ He thinks, as he holds Raiden's hand and chats with both him and Edan about the project he's working on, knowing full well that they're so cute and so smart and that if anyone so much as looked at them wrong, Mal would make sure they end up as his next science experiment. He knows that Edan and Raiden's job can be dangerous and he's not about to lose his boyfriends.

• Raiden is the one who brings the other two along for the daily coffee run, Mal goes out and gets the three lunch, and Edan takes his soulmates out to dinner. Two blocks from Edan's house is a cute little cafe and sometimes(read: all the time) he stops there to get something like doughnuts or scones or cookies or something for the other two.

• Raiden is constantly spoiling Edan and Mal with gifts, be they little trinkets, something useful, a huge amazing gift, and one time he actually took down a Biotide and brought it to Mal because he overheard Mal saying that he'd love to pick one apart. Let's just say Abrahm wasn't happy.

• Mal is the keeper of the sacred braincell, Edan is trying to get himself a braincell, and Raiden keeps lighting his last remaining braincell on fire.

• They have "WE ARE GOING TO BEAT YOU TO DEATH" ship energy. Goliath lives in constant fear of all three of them.

• Cuddle piles and nap piles on the couch are mandatory, as well as matching pajamas and saturday movie nights with spicy cheetos(for Edan), butterfingers(for Raiden), marshmallows(for Mal), and chocolate drizzled caramel popcorn(for all of them). They rotate who gets to pick what movie. Edan's got a bit of a liking for superhero films, Raiden likes awful horror movies and slashers, and Mal surprisingly likes cheesy romcoms.

• Abrahm always asks why Mal's lab reports are late, and every time he gets a response of Mal pointing at Edan and Raiden, who are both pointing at him and each other. Abe still hasn't figured out that they're dating and it's driving Dovahcom insane.

• Sometimes Edan brings his roller skates and goes skating around the lab. Raiden can't skate, but Edan gives him piggyback rides so he can enjoy it too. Mal has no interest in skating, but it's kinda mesmerizing and incredibly precious to see Edan just zipping around on wheels, having a little fun, especially when Raiden's with him. One time Abrahm opened the door as Edan was skating over to it and he accidentally kicked Abe in the head out of sheer panic. Raiden helped console the poor guy while Mal performed a quick lobotomy so Edan wouldn't get in trouble.

• They're a polycule of bastards. Bastard times 3. Bastard cubed. I love em. 10/10

BONUS 

Mal x Abrahm

• Oh, evil science dictator and his evil scientist henchman? Hell yes. Evil science dictator and his evil scientist henchman dating? Hell yes!!!

• Mal is a distinguished gay. Abrahm is a disaster bi. Do the math. Abrahm is constantly blushing at least a little and Mal is constantly flirting with him at least a little. It's like a positive feedback of Mal flirting with Abe, who gets red in the face, which prompts the warden to fluster him more, which makes this todoroki haired dipshit even redder, and so on and so forth until Goliath gets sick of it and yells at them to just get a room. This generally leads to Abrahm practically breaking down the cell door and throwing him at a wall before locking him in again. And then he kisses Mal right on the lips. And just to spite poor Goliath the end up making out literally right outside his cell.

• Abrahm tends to have Mal summoned to his office just to treat him to dinner/coffee/dessert/cuddles/ect. Mal often gives him a halfhearted grumble of "I have work I need to do." and Abrahm just shoots back with something like "As your supreme overlord and employer, I hereby relieve you of your duties for a while. Checkmate."

• Abrahm and Mal like to dance together, usually in the comfortable privacy of Abrahm's personal lounge. Usually they'll end up doing a dramatic tango, and Mal always dips Abrahm at least once, it's the dictator's fatal weakness, but if one of them isn't feeling up for something that fast paced and skilled, they'll just softly waltz together. And give each other soft little kisses. And compliments and words of affirmation, and praise. Lots of praise.

• Many times, Abrahm has forgotten that he can get drunk off of chocolate flavored liquor. Many times, Mal has found Abrahm crying, face down, on the couch in his room, mumbling incoherently in a drunken stupor with an empty bottle of 360 double chocolate flavored vodka falling out of his hand. Many times, Mal has gotten Abrahm to drink some water and then cuddled him for the rest of the night to comfort his distraught, horribly drunk boyfriend.

• Mal doesn't know vines. He doesn't know internet culture in general. Abrahm? Abrahm is quoting iconic vines constantly. You could be one of the lucky(or unlucky) bastards to hear Mal shout "WHY WOULD YOU PUT BARBEQUE SAUCE THERE?!?!" from Abrahm's office and double over wheezing and laughing.

• In this AU Abrahm is smaller than Mal. Mal still uses him as a pillow because his little red and white haired sweetheart is so soft and warm. Abrahm doesn't mind, he gets a free weighted blanket and lots of cuddles.

• Sometimes they make a date out of torturing and experimenting on Goliath, because they're soft and in love but they're still incredibly messed up.

• Evil Assholes Fall In Love, Become Even More Evil, More At 11. They have a Chemistry of Pure Nastiness and I adore them, 12/10

((There we go, that's all of them for the asshole trio!! You uh. may have to put this under a cut because it's long, but that's up to you ^^")) -Z

[phoebehalliwell]

so apparently my brain will not let me rest until I figure out the Prue/Roger dynamic, so: Prue's right out of college when she gets hired at the museum and she gets partnered with a senior curator, Roger. Roger flatters Prue first professionally, then personally, and when Prue is hesitant because he's married, he spins some line about how his marriage is over in everything but name. Prue, young and only having one real relationship before, falls for his charm and they start sneaking around 1/?

at the office. at some point Roger does divorce his wife, he and Prue are together publicly, and then he proposes. somewhere in there, he makes a move on Phoebe, who rejects him. Phoebe immediately goes to Prue, but Roger insists that she's lying, "Prue, don't you think I love you, I left my wife for you." Prue, habituated by years of this kind of emotional manipulation, chooses Roger over Phoebe. This pretty much destroys her relationship with her sister. Prue and Roger continue plans for the wedding until Grams dies, at which point Roger calls off the wedding because he didn't sign up to be anyone else's emotional support. Prue, spends her days angry at Roger, Grams, and Phoebe for abandoning her, and spends her nights secretly wondering if there was anything she could have done to keep any of them with her.   

hmm an inch resting yarn you have spun here but i’m gonna offer you another one: pure was popular in high school she was like really fuckin cool and she could very easily have been any man of her choosing. there was no settling for her, she was prue motherfuckin halliwell. so she went for what her heart always wanted and dated her childhood sweetheart andy trudeau. and like,, they were the It Couple in their heyday and it was definitely that passion head first our love will never die dramatic but also just kinda silly love. and that sorta sets the bar. then she’s off to college presumably at this point still trying to pursue a career in photography and she’s like having fun she hangs out with the artists and free spirits and people who were misfits in high school and draws them in with her undeniable queen bee energy but like. she knows her stuff. she doesn’t get by on looks and popularity, she’s really good at what she does. so now we bring in college boyfriend no. 1 who cupid name checked as alan, and we’ll say this really is a relationship of two artists and they’re both amazed by each other’s work and the soul and heart and spirit in it and in them it’s definitely the most pretentious of prue’s relationships but it’s like the kind where they “break into” the local art gallery after hours (alan works there and has a key, so it’s not like it took a lot of masterminding) and like slide around polished hardwood floors until they fall down laughing that type of vibe. but now we’re encroaching on prue’s blue period. for starters, piper’s get ready to y’know apply for college this that and the other and like grams is all concerned about how much college costs blah blah blah with paying for both prue and piper and the same time yada yada yada and prue sorta realizes how sorta tight the money situation is what with the cost of education and the house and this that and the other and she’s starting to realize that this photography career is Not the move bc like this house needs a breadwinner if they want to keep it blah blah blah so life already blows when she has to go pick up phoebe from a party which she’s not like happy about but like you know at least phoebe isn’t drunk driving maybe this is a chance for them to bond as sisters for prue to impart some wisdom on her chaotic younger sister but no of course not of course they have to get in a huge argument and prue doesn’t hit the breaks in time and the car gets totalled and phoebe lands in the hospital and like now prue’s sorta spiralling and she like wants to quit photography and she feels horrible about everything and alan who is again i must harp on pretty pretentious is like no u can’t quit ur family doesn’t understand you it’s not about the money it’s about the art use this pain to make something amazing to which like sorry king,,, but it is about the money. the manor has been in the family for decades and prue can’t lose it. and with piper’s college, phoebe’s hospital bills, and grams’s failing health... it’s 100% about the money dude. and fuck turning your pain into art fuck glorifying suffering and fuck you. so now prue’s p cut off she’s pretty isolated she’s all down in the dumps blah blah blah she changed majors to whatever major it was she needed for like museum jobs bc at least this way she can make bank but she’ll still hold a piece of art close to her and she like drowns herself in her work like she’s not just gonna be this major (art history?) she’s gonna be the fuckin best she’s gonna be the top of her class blah blah blah yada yada yada. but y’know flash forward an amount of time and her roommate’s like hey babe. i get like life’s shit i get u got to be the very best like no one ever was but like. you have not left the apartment in four months. you haven’t smiled in probably twice as long so like. idk do something?? that makes you happy maybe???? and prue’s just like :/ bc what made her happy was like photography but now she has very mixed emotions around that and her roommate’s like what did you do for fun in high school like what did you do after school and prue’s like idk cheerleading practice and her roommate’s like word well then go to cheerleading tryouts time skip we really see prue return to all her old glory and climb up the lil cheerleading ladder blah blah blah and in this renaissance of hers she also scores a new love interest who’s basically the opposite of alan enter tom peters the star wide receiver. and i think this relationship for prue was really just like fun it was tipping her toes back into the water it was learning to smile again it was just like a good time fun simple no concerns about the future just like vibing right then and there and then that ended just sorta naturally and they both graduated and it’s time for prue to leap into the professional world and she’s never left california so when she gets a job offer in london she jumps at the chance blah blah blah she’s working she’s having fun she’s defining herself enter eric from london who i’ll say is like a Business Man he’s like a this that or the other idk maybe a museum investor like the young son who just took over his dad’s business that sorta vibe and like eyes meet breath catches there was just this click but it like took them months to get together it was just this dance this game of cat and mouse until prue finally like took the bull by the horns and just like went for it and i think that would be her like most “adult” relationship like dates were going out to fancy dinners not breaking and entering or picnics on the empty football field these were like two professional adults like dating but you know they hit a year and then some and we’ll say like prue is maybe like 24 25 and this guy’s maybe 29 or whatever and they’ve attended friend’s weddings bs they’ve hit that era where everyone’s getting married and suddenly this cloud’s hanging in the air like baby are you my forever girl like is this it fifty years from now to i still come home to you put you know what let’s push that to the back of our minds but now eric’s like 30 and his family’s like dawg,,,, r u gonna be like a spinster or something are you gonna put a ring on it or not and prue (after many many international phone calls to piper) has decided yes she’d do it she’d stay her and be with this man she loves and eric decides prue’s just not the girl for her. so uh. ouch. blah blah blah prue’s had her fun in the uk but it’s like time to return home piper’s just graduates college or whatever and found a job in the city if prue follows suit they could room together which is when she gets the job at the museum where roger works at. and blah blah blah prue’s like amazing as always and of course she catches roger’s attention bc how could she not and he’s constantly pursuing her and prue keeps turning him down at first bc she’s not really interested and then like he’s her boss and then like it becomes a sort of game but now all her friends from high school are getting married and marcia from homeroom has a baby look and the lil pumpkin on her christmas card and fuck what am i doing so you know what yes roger i’ll be your date to the new years party and here’s the thing roger knows prue is really impressive like she’s amazing at her job and she’s a total babe like he shows her off all the time and prue’s like you know receiving this really high praise and you know roger also has cash to spare so it’s like it’s not bad and she doesn’t well love him but he clearly loves her so she can be satisfied and you know her high school reunion is this year and if there’s one thing she would love it would be to write (nee halliwell) on her nametag, to show she got the job, she got the guy, and she’s living pretty in pac heights. so when roger proposes, she says yes. and piper’s happy for her and phoebe thinks roger’s a sleaze and grams is lukewarm but what does grams know about a long lasting marriage and what does phoebe know about anything so blah blah blah she goes to that high school reunion with a big ol rock on her finger and this that and the other and like to be perfectly frank coming home to roger is not like the highlight of her day there’s not this comforting glow when she falls asleep next to him but it’s like. she’s committed. she’s gonna see this through. besides, they’re already working on the guest list and venue and everything like she’s in it now there’s no turning back now and it’s fine like roger’s fine he’s perfectly palatable and she’s encroaching on 30 so. well whatever prue and roger host an easter party and it’s so cute she’s in a darling floral dress dazzling roger’s stuck up parents and eating finger sandwiches when she hears voices coming from the bedroom and is like gonna pretend to ignore it when she catches piper’s eye and piper has that uncomfortable look on her face and she realizes she can’t find phoebe anywhere and Where Is Roger and she busts in on the two of them looking disheveled and phoebe’s like prue- and prue’s like i don’t want to hear it and roger’s like baby- and prue’s like not now and she turns to phoebe like i think it’s best you go and she looks at roger like we’ll talk about this later your parents are wondering where you are so piper drives phoebe home and phoebe’s telling her about how she went to confront roger on being a whore and also like a spineless sleazebag and she was gonna tell prue when he totally started hitting on her and trying to kiss her and then prue broke in and piper’s like uh huh uh huh bc like. she doesn’t like roger all that much. and she agrees with phoebe. but still this thought sorta lingers at the back of her mind like could phoebe have done something? purely to get back at prue? no she wouldn’t. probably. meanwhile roger’s like your sister was totally hitting on me blah blah blah and prue’s like we can talk about it later right now we’re hosting a very nice party and i’m not going to have you ruin in and roger’s like see that’s what i love about you and prue’s like yeah cool and now whenever she comes home to roger she’s just like 🙄 and she’s like complaining to piper about how like she like doesn’t really want to marry him but it’s like too late now the venue’s booked and the save-the-dates have been sent out and piper’s like it’s not too late until you say i do. do you really want to be married to that sleazebag? and prue’s like :| and piper’s like you can call off the wedding and prue’s like :| and piper’s like i’m just saying and prue’s like does he remind you of dad? and piper’s like what? and prue’s like i think roger’s just like victor. i think i’m about to make the same mistake mom made. god, i always wondered how she could have married such a douchebag and here i am about to do the exact same thing! and piper’s not really commenting bc she doesn’t really remember dad but what she does say is you haven’t made that mistake yet so prue’s like you’re right. and that night she calls of the engagement.

[lisaofcypher]

My Home (A Dream SMP fan novel)

Once there were two orphan boys, with no where to call home but each other, until one summer trip to a weird town in Oregon, US. From strange disk journals, mystery authors, time traverlers, zombies, amnesiac half endermen half ghast people, hybrids, and teenage angst, with demons thrown in as well, looks like this summer will have more in store then they thought.

(Summary is poor, but try the first chapter, it explains the plot better. Loosely inspired by Gravity Falls)

Episode One- A Mystery in Vinyls

Episode One- Having Disk sounds great

Tommy’s leg bounces up and down, hitting the metal floor of the bus. 

“Are you nervous, Tubs?” Tommy asks, looking out the window as they pass a bunch of pine trees.

Tubbo sighed, “A bit, yeah.”He paused for a moment. “You?”

Tommy smiles. “Of course not? I have two brothers and a dad! That’s awesome!”

Tubbo only smiled, a hint of sadness in the air. It was common knowledge between the two that for whatever reason, Tubbos parents had left him on the side of the road, and if it wasn’t for a random couple driving by and noticing him, he’d be dead by now.

Just the thought made Tommy shudder.

“I hope he has great music taste!” Tommy.riM. “Maybe he knows some hot girls.” He winks.

Tubbo sighs, “Are girls all you think about?”

“I also think about drugs!”

“You disappoint me.”

“I know!”

“Next stop, L’Manburg!” The bus driver yelled, breaking up the conversation.

“That’s our stop,” Tommy exclaims, getting his bags.

Tubbo inhales quickly, grabbing his own small backpack. It was full of clothes and a bunch of pollen and nectar for his weird obsession with bees. There were over 500 different species of bees living in Oregon.

Tommy was never gonna hear the end of it.

As they walked off the bus, thanking the bus driver politely, they were greeted by a guy with a beanie and a JD style trench coat. He was leaning against a pole, looking like a classic stoner.

“Hey,” he says, shrugging, clearly not too bothered by actual emotions. 

Tommy was shocked, no gasps, no hugging and crying about how their baby brother came home. 

Instead he got, “You look scrawnier than I expected.”

Wow.

That’s nice.

“Who are you?!” Tommy snaps, accusingly. How did he know this was his older brother anyway? He could be some weird stranger.

“Wilbur Soot, your older brother.” He replies, casually.

“Huh, my last name is Soot…” Tommy mumbles to himself.

“No shit, we’re family,” Wilbur sighs, as if Tommy had made the worst joke in existence, as he begins leading the boys , quietly through a trail in the forest.

“Who’s this, your boyfriend?” Wilbur asks, breaking the uncomfortable silence.

Tubbo quickly shakes his head.

“Is he mute?” Wilbur asks.

“‘No, he’s not mute, and he’s my best friend, my brother even,” Tommy defensively spats.

“Then why isn’t he talking?”

“He doesn’t like talking in front of strangers.”

“Uh huh,” Wilbur rolls his eyes. He continues to walk down until they get to a small clearing, to a shack with the name “Mystery Carava.”

Next to it there was a road, with cars leaving and driving in.

“We could have walked down the road instead of hiking!?” Tommy asks, panting. He was this close to smacking Wilbur.

Wilbur smirks. “I prefer the scenery trail.”

“This is it? Why is it called the Mystery Carava?” Tommy asks, looking up at the weird van looking shack.

“The N fell off,” Wilbur shrugs, walking inside and gesturing for the boys to come in.

Inside there was a guy fixing up a bear statue. He saw the boys and ran over.

“You’re here!” He exclaimed. “I’m Philza Soot, but you can call me Phil.” He smiles. He has blonde hair like Tommy’s but longer, and  wears a green cloak. Is it a family trait to have a fashion sense?

“Well I’m Tommy! And this is my best bud Tubbo!” Tommy grins, pulling an arm around his best friend, who smiles sheepishly.

“Oh well, I see you’ve met my son, Wilbur, hope he wasn’t too rude,” Phil laughs awkwardly. “His twin, Techno, is out getting some meat for dinner.”

Both boys look at each other. “Ready to see your room?” Phil winks.

The room is small, with a window in the middle and two beds against the two walls. It was in the attic. 

Tommy takes the red bed instantly, jumping on it and laying out all his stuff. Tubbo takes the tree covered bed, leaving his suitcase by the bed, not bothering to unpack it right now.

“Wanna go explore the forest?” Tommy asks, looking out of the window at the forest looming around the shack.

“Are you sure that’s a good idea? I mean- it seems kind of dangerous-“ Tubbo mumbles, not wanting to get himself in danger on the first day.

“Exactly! What if it has like a 

 that we can 

” With that, Tommy grabs Tubbos arm and drags him out of the room and down the stairs.

The forest is beautiful, especially with the nice tint of the sunset. 

“Tommy, it’s getting late, can we please go home?” Tubbo mumbles.

“Do you want to be a pussy?!” Tommy glares.

Tubbo shrinks. “No, sorry.”

Tommy keeps running  until he tripped over a branch and hit his shoulder on a tree.

“Are you okay, Toms?!” Tubbo cries, running over.

“I’m fine, I’m fine.” He brushes himself off, grabbing his shoulders. “That was really hard for a tree…”

“Well maybe cause you ran into it!?” Tubbo exclaims.

“Or maybe…” Tommy looks at the tree, feeling it. “It feels like metal.” He turns to Tubbo, who walks over, playing with the sleeve of his green sweater.

“Hm,” Tommy looks all around the tree, before finding a button, pressing it excitedly.

The metal part opens, lifting, showing...

“Disks?” Tommy asks, grabbing them immediately.

“What are you doing? What if it’s booby trapped?” Tubbo snaps.

“Or it’s just disks. What are they?” He brushes his fingers along the black circle. There were two disks in here.

“Maybe we should go home, see if Phil has any way to play them?” Tubbo suggests.

Tommy sighs, looking up at his best friend, then at the darkening sun, “Yeah, you’re right,” he says as he begins walking. Then he realizes something and stops “Hey, Tubs?”

“Yeah?”

“Do you remember the way back?”

After what feels like a lifetime of walking, they reach the caravan.

“I don’t get why it’s called a caravan, it’s not even a van!” Tommy complains as he walks in.

There was Phil, frowning, with Wilbur sitting by the cashier desk, his legs resting casually on it.

“Where were you?” Phil asks accusingly, having clearly already the role of 

“Out in the forest?” Tommy exclaims, shrugging.

“Do you know how late it is? Couldn’t you have sent me a text or something?!” Phil asks.

“We don’t have phones.”

“Told me where you were going?”

“We didn’t think we needed to.”

Phil sighs, walking closer to the boys, “I know you two grew up without a father… but I’m here now. You- you need to tell me where you are. I don’t know if you can take care of yourself, like Techno. Please, boys, work with me, and I’ll work with you. I know the system isn’t kind, and you’re not used to having anyone but each other, but I swear to you, I’m not leaving you, just please stay safe and work with me here.” He rests his hands on both of the boys’ shoulders.

Tommy looks down at his feet. “Fine, but we both know this arrangement is temporary,” Tommy says before walking upstairs.

“Tommy-“ Phil tries, but Tommy is already gone.

Tubbo begins following, but Phil grabs his shoulder, pulling him back.

“Hey, Tubbo, I- I know you’re not related to Tommy or me, but you’re just as much my son now, as he is. You’re a Soot. I promise.” Phil smiles.

Tubbo blinks. “Thank you, Phil,” he says, then walks up.

It was the first time Tubbo had talked to them.

——— ———

“So, I found a disk player in the storage room, I hope Phil won’t mind us stealing this,” Tommy says, bringing in an old disk player and dropping it on his bed.

Tubbo looks up at him. “What if the disks are haunted and we summon an evil demon?”

“If that happens, that’d be like, really fucking awesome, ya know?”

He hooks up the disk player and puts in the disk, connecting it to a speaker.

“Audio log one, side A. It’s been a year since I moved to L’Manburg,” the voice on the speaker says. It sounds familiar, but Tommy can’t put his finger on it.

“And in all my time researching the strange fantastical elements of the town, I never could have expected this. The town has strange mystical elements, ones I can describe but not exactly explain. Just yesterday I saw a giant bee that was purple! That’s not how bees work! Trust me, I know a lot about them. Kind of an obsession of mine. My brother keeps telling me to relax, stop looking into these things. But I won’t. I will get to the bottom of this. This town could be the key to figuring out why I have these horns.” As he says that, Tubbo jolts up, touching his own horns. “He’s like me?”

“My goal for this week is to see if I can help my friend and restore his memory. Perhaps his half enderman nature could have something to do with it.”

“Half endermen? But those don’t even exist!” Tommy yells.

“I hope my brother understands…. He’s always been a loud guy, and I love him, but... at least my new friend is kinder to me. Alas, I must get going, before P gets annoyed and sends T after me. Until next time, my precious disks.”

And that’s when Tommy stops it.

“Oh my god….” Tubbo mumbles, stunned.

“This guy is a total nutcase!” Tommy snaps.

“How are you so sure?” Tubbo asks.

“Look at the guy, he’s talking about endermen and purple bees! That’s not even possible!”

“Maybe not…” Tubbo sighs, he can't help but relate to this mysterious man, with his horns and love of bees.

“What are you guys doing with my disk player?” A voice asks, and they look up and gasp.

It’s a young man with a pink braid who is wearing a white tunic with a red jacket, and has red eyes….

It must be Techno.

“Uh…. hi! I’m Tommy!” Tommy shoots up.

“Yeah I got that part.”

“We just wanted to play some disks we found in the forest!” Once again, Tubbo facepalms at his brother’s lack of a filter.

“You found disks in the forest?” 

“Yeah! In some weird tree compartment!”

“That’s interesting, look, next time ask me, or I’ll make sure you won’t even be able to grab it.”

Oh great, this guy is threatening violence.

“Why are your eyes red?” Tommy asks.

“Uh, contacts,” Techno quickly responds.

Those eyes look far too real for contacts, but Tommy drops it, not wanting to anger the man any further.

“Anyway, welcome. Try not to die.” And then he leaves, closing the door behind him.

“Try not to die!?” Tubbo gulps.

“Well… that was something.”

“Guess we have a mystery on our hands!”

“Mystery….?” Tubbo asks cautiously.

“Well yeah? We have to figure out who the man recording the disks is, and if these enderman creatures are real!”

Tubbo smiles, trying to hide his apprehension at the idea of looking for danger.

“So far, this place feels more like home than Manchester ever did.”

“I mean, we’re in a foreign country, but yeah,” Tubbo shrugs.

“That guy on the disk has the same bee obsession that you do!” Tommy points out.

“Yeah, I guess he does.”

“Are you assuming one's gender, Tobias?” Tommy teases.

“Don’t call me that!” Tubbo smacks his brother over the head.

“Oh what are you gonna do? Tackle me with your short legs? I could take you easy!”

“When was the last time you worked out, Tommy?” Tubbo snaps back with a grin.

“When was the last time you did?” Tommy pushes Tubbo.

“Asshole!” Tubbo pouts.

Tommy laughed, taking off his shirt for bed.

“Sleep well Tubs,” Tommy whispers, turning off the light.

“You too, Toms.” 

Who knows what this town has in store for them. They’re together, and that’s what matters.

——— ———

“Is it almost ready, Sam?” A man asks, as Sam works on the portal.

“It should be, Mr. President, just give me a moment.”

“We need to hurry up before the goons find us.” The man gulps.

“I know, I know. Dream and his forces will never track us down here.”

“You consulted Karl right?”

“Of course not. Karl can suck my dick, this is for the sake of humanity.”

“I hope this works… for my sake and Earths.”

“Mine too,” Sam frowns.

“Because if it doesn’t I know what will happen.”

[bnhabadass]

BNHA Halloween Day 9 - Horns

@bnha-halloween2019 | Day [9]: [Horns] / [Kirishima x Reader] | [Mature] | [Borderline smut, mention of bondage]

It was a warm day for October, and you and your boyfriend decided to visit the Halloween store that had just opened up in the mall. You always loved those big animatronic ghouls and witches that said stuff like “come in little girl” followed by an ugly cackle.

Kirishima pulled his car into the parking lot and the two of you got out, you skipping and acting jumpier than usual out of the sheer excitement that was your favorite time of the year. “Wait for me!” Kiri said, running to catch up with you and tackle you to the ground.

You squealed but caught your fall before hitting the pavement. You stood up and saw he was running away from you, so you chased after him only to see that he had stopped and was staring at something.

“Haha check this guy out.” He pointed to a zombified looking guy who, when you press a button, begins moving his arm, grasping for something (or someone). You laughed, loving how much Kiri was getting into the spooky spirit. You reached for his hand and the two of you walked into the store together.

You were enticed by some of the sexy looking costumes and wigs lining the walls of the store. Maybe if there was time you could try a couple on. Who knows, maybe Kiri would like it.

He didn’t seem interested in what you were eyeing, though. He broke his grip away from you and grabbed a Jason mask hanging on the wall. “What do you think of this, babe?” he asked.

You giggled and went over to lift up the mask and kiss him. “I think you should wear that for Bakugo during one of your bromance sessions.”

“Is somebody jealous?” he asked, quirking his eyebrow up. The smirk on his lips continued turning upward as you pretended to think long and hard about the question.

“Maybe not jealous, perse.”

“Then I guess we’ll have to do something about that.”

You tried leaning in to kiss him again, but he ducked and ran off, only leaving the mask in your hands. You scoffed, both out of irritation and amusement. Where did that boy run off to? Oh well. It gave you a bit more time to browse those sexy costumes you saw earlier.

You walked over to the array of adult costumes, your eyes lingering on some of them a bit longer than others. They weren’t supposed to be lingerie, but how were they not! There were so many of them. Sexy bee, sexy red riding hood, sexy nurse, sexy prison inmate, you shuddered at the sexy minion costume. This list went on and on. That’s when your eyes landed on the most raunchy looking of them all. The sexy devil. The costume was just straight up bondage; a tiny leotard with a lace up front and cups for your breasts as well as a shibari style harness in the shape of a pentagram to go around your chest. It also came with small little hair clips in the shape of devil horns. You loved it. And you knew Kiri would like it too.

You grabbed it off the rack and went over to the self checkout, taking out your wallet and sticking your card in the machine. The transaction had been completed, and now all you had to do was hide the costume in your–

“There you are!”

You yelped and shoved the costume behind your back at hearing Kirishima’s voice.

“Did you find what you were looking for?”

You completely forgot. The only reason you came here in the first place was to find a big bowl with pumpkins on it or something to put the candy in for trick-or-treaters. “Uh…nope,” you said. “Guess we’ll have to look somewhere else!”

“Well what’s that?” He pointed to the thing you kept behind your back.

“Uh...” Think, (Y/n). You clutched the costume desperately and looked around the store, stating the first thing your eyes landed on. “Grease paint.”

“Grease paint?” He quirked his eyebrow up at you, not really buying what you had said.

“Yes.” Oh god, what do you say in this situation. “Because I decided I’m going to be a…” Come on, (Y/n). Quick lie quick lie quick lie. “...vampire this halloween.”

“A vampire,” he said.

This had to be the most painful conversation. “Yes. I’m going to be a vampire.”

He smiled at you with his big sharp teeth. “Well alright then. Do you want to get anything else for your costume while we’re here?”

“Nope,” you said. The stoic expression on your face refused to leave. “Let’s just mosey on outta here.”

He laughed and you two walked out of the store. You tucked the costume into your purse while he wasn’t looking. By the time the two of you made it back to your apartment, you only had a couple hours until you had to go to work. You had been assigned night patrol and was not looking forward to the long hours ahead.

“I’ll start dinner,” Kiri said, getting out of the car.

“Sounds good.” You yawned, also getting out of the car. “I think I’m gonna take a quick nap before work.”

He pressed a kiss to the top of your head. “Rest up, babe.”

You smiled a sleepy smile at him before taking out your keys and unlocking the apartment. You opened your bedroom door and threw your purse onto the bed. The costume you purchased fell out and onto the floor. You might as well try it on while you had the time. After all, you bought it on a whim and wasn’t even sure if it was the right size. You gently opened the bag and took out the costume. The leotard was skimpy, leaving very little to the imagination.

You took off your shirt and unbuttoned your jeans, allowing them to slip off with ease. You stuck one leg through the leotard and then let the other follow. The harness was easy to slip over your neck, and there was a little tail you noticed dangling between your legs. You looked in the mirror. Sexy was one word to describe the way you looked. Fierce was another. You were shocked to see just how well the costume accentuated every one of your curves. You couldn’t help but toss your hair around at the sight, making it look bigger than it actually is. That’s when you remembered the little clip on horns. Once you put them in, the costume was perfect. You couldn’t help but do a little twirl and pose for yourself in the mirror.

“That looks cute.”

You jumped a little at hearing your boyfriend’s voice. He wasn’t meant to see you in this. Not yet anyway. You crossed your arms, a terrified expression on your face.

“Don’t be scared,” he said. He walked over to the bed and sat on the edge, patting the seat next to him. “Come here.”

You obliged, still clutching yourself for dear life. You gulped as you sat next to him. “What do you think?” Any self confidence you had before was long gone.

Kirishima looked up and put his hand on his chin, pretending to think long and hard about it. “Hmm. I don’t know if I should be scared or intrigued.”

You hit him on the arm and he laughed.

“I’m just joking,” he said. “You look so fucking sexy.” The way his usually spiky hair fell over his eyes, added by the hungry looking grin on his face, made him look like a beast, like you were his prey and he was here to devour you. He leaned in and caught your lips with his own. The two of you were like that, just making out on the edge of your bed for a long time. He pulled your bottom lip back with his teeth and you gave him a sultry look. He began kissing down your neck, leaving small marks everywhere his lips touched. He grabbed part of the pentagram harness with his teeth and lifted it up, only to open his mouth and have it release onto your skin, causing you to gasp.

Kiri was never rough during sex, which made you wonder what was in store just then. He pushed you back ever so gently so your back hit the mattress. He continued kissing down your body, then made his way back up your thighs. He stopped for a second to look up and you and clink the end of his fingernail against the clip on horns. “I like your horns,” he said.

“Really? That’s what you stopped for?”

He gave a low chuckle. “You want me to continue?”

You gave a silent nod.

“Alright then.” He pressed a warm hand to your pelvis and gently pushed down as he kissed the inside of your thighs.

Yes, you thought. Yes. Yes. Keep going Kiri.

But your thoughts were interrupted when the alarm on your phone went off. Right. You had work in an hour. The both of you sighed out of frustration. And just when it was getting to the good part.

“You should eat something before going to work,” he said. He extended an arm to help you up, but you dragged him closer until he fell on top of you. This time you were the one to capture his lips with yours.

“To be continued,” you said with a small wink before getting up to change. Your shift at work that night was agonizing. All you could think about were Kirishima’s kisses and how sexy you looked in that devil costume. You were quick to race back home after your shift, and you wasted no time unlocking the door and bursting in.

Kirishima looked up at you, and you saw that your little clip on horns were placed meticulously in his hair.

You tried stifling a laugh. “What are you wearing?”

“What?” He smiled at you. “I told you I like your horns.”

[ayma-nidiot]

“Don’t Speak Their Names” - Shrimpshipping fic Chapter 11

This chapter on AO3 can be found here.

Chapter 11 - Strengthening My Deck

~29 July 2005~

“Phew…” Rex could finally walk on his own again after nearly two months of hospitalization. While holding Weevil’s hand, he now walked out of the hospital, greeted by the sunlight. “It feels nice to have not thrown up once this week.”

“I can’t even imagine.” Weevil frowned.

Rex caressed his now-very-obvious baby bump. “You’ve caused me a lot of trouble, you know that? When you grow up, you better be grateful.” Despite what he said, the presence of this new occupant in his body calmed him, and he spoke with a smile.

“So, Rex… How are you feeling?” Weevil placed a hand on Rex’s forehead; he felt a little hot, but not as much as he did a couple of months back.

“Great! Except…” Rex had felt a slow ache in his chest on his entire walk out of the hospital; he now had man boobs, and hadn’t noticed them until just now. “This whole pregnancy thing is still so surreal. It’s hard to imagine that five months from now, I’ll be breastfeeding our child.”

Weevil enjoyed the time they had together, smiling at Rex’s baby bump while the bug duelist stroked it. Then he broke the silence with, “Now that you’re out, what do you want to do?”

“Duel, what else?”

“No. Absolutely not.” Weevil held up a hand to slap Rex, and barely held it back. “You’re going to study for your college entrance exams so we can go to the same college together. And I don’t want you to risk a miscarriage.”

“But Weeves, I studied like the trooper I am, even while I was in the hospital!” Rex flexed his arms. “You did see, didn’t you?”

“But… Considering how you barely graduated-”

“Weeves.” Rex placed both hands on his boyfriend’s shoulders. “I am going to die of boredom if I don’t duel every now and then.”

“Well, good luck trying to find someone who wants to duel you, because it certainly won’t be me.” Weevil put his foot down.

“Humph. Some fun you are, bug boy.”

“Did someone say ‘duel?’” spoke a man’s voice from the hospital entrance.

“Waaaah!” Rex nearly doubled over. “Don’t scare me like that, you turd- Wait, I remember you. You’re that creep that was spying on me from my hospital room two months ago.”

The mystery man completely ignored Rex and revealed his Duel Disk. “If you’re looking for a challenger, you’ve got one.”

Then, just like that, Rex had put aside how this man weirded him out, and readied his own Duel Disk. “It’s a good thing that Weeves and I were strengthening our decks when I was hospitalized, or else I probably wouldn’t have this on me.”

“Are you out of your damned mind, Rex?” Weevil tried to stop his boyfriend, and might have been able to, had Amber not appeared out of the blue.

“No, I think he’ll be fine,” Amber spoke with her own Duel Disk at the ready. “While the pain inflicted by direct attacks feels real and immense, keep in mind that it’s all illusion. It shouldn’t pose a threat to him.”

“Who asked you? ” Weevil snarled. “And anyway, where the hell were you these past two months?”

“...Strengthening my deck,” Amber replied tersely.

“Aaaargh!” Weevil angrily activated his Duel Disk. “You know what, dino brain, go ahead. Duel if you want. But I’m tag teaming with you to make sure you don’t do anything stupid.”

“So, I guess that means I’m tag teaming with this pretty lady here?” asked the mystery man.

“Can it, you toad.” Amber then looked to her opponents. “Duel standby!”

“Ladies first,” Weevil said to Amber.

“Don’t underestimate me, bug boy. I set a monster and another card, then end my turn.”

Weevil drew his first card. “I summon Armored Bee in attack mode, and set a card!”

“What, that’s it?” asked the mystery man. “Too bad, because I set this pretty cool trap. Then I summon two Gilasaurus and a Jurrac Velo in attack mode.”

“Whoa!” Rex exclaimed. “Another dino duelist! Well, I’ll show you that I’m the best dino duelist in this city!”

“So draw your card then, dino brain.” Weevil rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, whatever. I summon Giant Rex in attack mode, play the spell Jurassic World, then set a card. Go ahead, hot stuff.”

“Oh, I’ll show you who’s hot stuff…” Amber grumbled. “I activate my spell card Eradicating Aerosol! That gets rid of all insects on the field, which includes my set monster, Pinch Hopper!”

“I’m still better at using insects than you, punk,” Weevil snarled as he was now open to a direct attack.

“Really? Then how do you plan to stop this? Thanks to Pinch Hopper’s effect, I can Special Summon any insect from my hand… Say hello to the gorgeous, magnificent Insect Princess!”

“‘Insect Princess?’” Weevil had never heard of this card before, but it certainly looked familiar. “Huh. Well, I’ve got the Queen, and once I can summon her, your Princess will be done for!”

“Is that what you think? Insect Princess! Prove this worm boy wrong!”

“Hehehe, she’s going to have to wait! I activate Enemy Controller to force your Insect Princess into defense mode!”

“Heh, nothing I can’t handle. I set a card, then end my turn.”

Okay! Weevil smirked when he drew his Metamorphosed Insect Queen. The only other two cards in his hand, however, were Naturia Butterfly and another Armored Bee. All I need is Pinch Hopper, and I can summon my Queen! I should probably do something about those monsters the weird man has… “I activate Armored Bee’s special ability to cut the attack of one of the Gilasaurus in half! Now, Armored Bee, give that Gilasaurus a good sting!”

“Oof…” The mystery man took 900 points of damage. “Not bad, not bad… But my other Gilasaurus is still fine! I use it to attack your Armored Bee!”

“Oh, no you don’t!” Rex cut in and revealed his face-down card. “My trap Dimensional Prison… well, traps your Gilasaurus in a dimensional prison!”

“Hahahaha…” 

“What, was my joke actually that funny?”

“Yeah. Believe that if you want to. Jurrac Velo, stomp that Bee!”

Crap… Weevil gulped. I’m the one who’s supposed to be protecting Rex, and yet I’m open to attack. Again.

Rex drew Polymerization; he now only needed a Gilasaurus to summon Horned Saurus. That Jurrac Velo is going to be a problem… But my Giant Rex has the same attack. I think I should kamikaze it. “I summon another Giant Rex, and use one of them to destroy your Jurrac Velo!”

“Not the sharpest tool in the shed, are we?” the mystery man snickered. “When my Jurrac Velo is destroyed, I can Special Summon a Jurrac monster from my deck! And I chose Jurrac Gallim!”

“I’m sharper than you think! I have that card, and I know what it does!”

“Yup, you’re so sharp that you told your opponent what cards you have in your deck,” Weevil sighed.

“Shut up, bug boy! At least I have monsters to protect me!” Rex shot back. 

“Uh… Do you guys always bicker like this?” Amber looked at her opponents cock-eyed.

“No!” Both young men replied simultaneously.

“This is going to break up the tea party… Insect Princess, attack Weevil directly!” 

“Owwwww!” Weevil fell to his knees. ‘An illusion,’ my ass! ...Okay, I didn’t draw a Pinch Hopper, but at least I can stall for time with my Naturia Butterfly. “I summon Naturia Butterfly in defense-”

“Ohoho, I don’t think so,” Amber interrupted. “Thanks to Insect Princess’ special ability, your insect monster is forced into attack mode!”

“I… end my turn…” 

“Yup, you’re boned.” Rex bit his lip. “A monster with 500 ATK isn’t going to help.”

“Shaddup! I can still activate my Butterfly’s special ability!”

“There they go again,” the mystery man laughed. “I play Double Summon so that I can summon another Gilasaurus! Then I tribute it and my Jurrac Gallim to summon the king of my dinosaur deck… Jurrac Tyrannus!”

“Wow!!” Despite the tight spot both he and Weevil were in, Rex admired this enormous monster. “Where did you get it? I want it bad!”

“Maybe I’ll let you have it if you beat me. Emphasis on ‘maybe.’ Why don’t I show you just what it can do? Once per turn, I can tribute a dinosaur to my Tyrannus so he gains 500 attack points! And I tribute my last Gilasaurus! Prepare to say goodbye, Weevil!”

“S-So? I can still negate your attack with Naturia Butterfly!”

“But wait! There’s more! I activate my trap Survival Instinct! This allows me to banish any number of dinos from my Graveyard and gain 400 Life Points for each! Since I have five, that’s 2000 Life Points I gain! But my dinos won’t be banished for long. I shuffle them all back into my deck so I can summon the second strongest monster in my deck… Come on out, Overtex Qoatlus!”

“Oh no…” Even with Naturia Butterfly’s effect, Weevil knew that he was done for. 

“Go, my dinos! Stomp that puny butterfly and wipe out the rest of Weevil’s Life Points!”

“Hah…” Weevil looked up at Rex from a kneeling position. “Sorry, hun, they got me.”

Amber cut in, “You know, Rex, there’s nothing in your deck that can stand up to a Jurrac Tyrannus. I’ll be a sweetheart and let you yield now, if you want.”

“Never! The runner-up at regionals doesn’t yield!” Rex would soon regret this decision, however, as during his next turn, he didn’t summon anything meaningful, and the mystery man’s mighty monsters stomped him flat. “Well, that… um… was quite the challenge.”

As soon as the duel ended, Weevil ran up to Rex, and touched his baby bump. “Rex! Are you okay?”

“Yeah…” Rex stretched a bit before fully standing up and approaching the mystery man. “I really would love to learn more about your playing style! Especially since I have never met another dinosaur duelist before! Dude, what’s your name?”

“The name’s Dr. Saurus. I’m actually a professor at Domino City University.”

“Hey, did you hear that, Weeves?” Rex turned to his boyfriend. “If I make it into your college, then I might have this guy as my teacher!”

“So now do you have incentive to study, dino brain?”

“You bet! But I also have to ask… Is there a special reason that the two of you wanted to duel us? And a tag duel, no less?”

“...” Amber stayed silent for a bit before she replied, “Dr. Saurus and I have always been big fans of yours ever since your glory days from regionals.”

“What? I didn’t know we still had fans!” Weevil exclaimed.

“That explains why you wanted to follow me around when we were still in high school.”

“Yup! Though I think Weevil is way smarter than you, which is why I chose to use an insect deck. I think it’s a sophisticated type that only the best of the best can appreciate.”

“Hahaha!” Weevil stuck his tongue out at Rex, who pouted in response.

“So now that we have a common bond through dueling, why don’t we go for a stroll?” Dr. Saurus proposed. 

“Yes, please,” Rex answered as the four began their walk. “Dr. Saurus, please teach me all of your-”

The dino duelist stopped in his tracks when he noticed a whiff of what he thought was a Red-Eyes Black Dragon fly past.

“Rex? Is something the matter, hun?”

“No, I… Either my pregnancy is causing me to hallucinate, or someone’s Duel Disk visuals are malfunctioning.”

“I highly doubt it’s the latter.” Weevil took Rex’s hand into his own. “Come, let’s go.”

[midnightblaine]

12 - language

Breaking Open

notes: this I actually posted like two months ago and I’m planning to post more 😭 I just need my brain to cooperate with me

AO3

They were right at the gates for artists in no time. Blaine had enjoyed the quiet simplicity of walking through Central Park with Kurt, but he knew better than to try and slow them down to bask in his company. His boyfriend was so hyped up he might have been skipping to the concert.

Kurt was wearing a forest green button up with mustard pants, a gray bomber with violet sleeves that gave him an edge to his look. Blaine could see clearly Elliot’s touch on the outfit, maybe they had gone shopping together, planned outfits together in all the time they spent at Elliot’s place.

Blaine’s stomach churned and he gripped Kurt’s hands tighter.

*

Staff ushered them to the tents after they showed their passes and soon came face to face with rest of One Three Hill and several other artists milling about.

“Blaine!” a very enthusiastic Dani greeted him. Blaine barely had time to give her a sheepish smile before she leapt right into his arms. She was just short of vibrating and when they pulled apart, he saw Elliot reaching out for Kurt, messing up his hair after a short embrace.

Kurt batted his hand away and pulled Blaine closer to him where he could offer his hand to Elliot.

“It’s nice to see you,” he greeted politely and hoped his hand wasn’t shaking. Elliot grabbed his hand and pulled him into a one-armed hug.

“You too, man,” Elliot smiled easily, he seemed to do every little thing effortlessly. Blaine returned to Kurt’s side. “And thank you, for giving Kurt back. He has been outrageously busy these last few days.”

Blaine burrowed deeper into Kurt as his boyfriend rolled his eyes.

“I spend too much time with you two as it is, Blaine is just a beautiful, welcome distraction,” he looked into Blaine’s eyes with a teasing glint in his gaze, making him feel warm all over.

“Stop it, you horn dogs – we have a setlist to go over.”

Kurt teared his gaze away from Blaine. “Ugh, Dani! Tell him we’ve gone through it a thousand times; we need to rest until our time’s up.”

The three of them delved into a discussion of setlist and rehearsal time as they walked deeper into the tent, Blaine following awkwardly behind, Kurt’s hand still joined with his.

Seeing Elliot again was like a blow to Blaine’s chest. He could (almost) brush off all the guys at school that tripped over themselves to get Kurt’s attention but Elliot – he was Kurt’s best friend, they got along perfectly. Elliot was funny and smart and cool, he was unfairly handsome, tall and had a head full of thick luscious hair, and Blaine was – he didn’t even want to go there. Blaine couldn’t even begin to measure up to someone like Elliot who – to top it all off, spent a lot of time with Kurt. He didn’t know how long he had left before Kurt realized he would be better off with someone else but he was sure that seeing Blaine and Elliot in the same room wasn’t helping.

Blaine wished he could disappear, find an excuse to get away from their increasingly heated argument and his increasingly loud thoughts. He looked left and right, scanning the place for something to do when a tap on his shoulder made him turn around.

“Marley!”

His shoulders slumped in relief at the sight of his friend in a sundress with tights and a pair of ankle boots, miles away from the dressed down outfits she chose to wear to school, Blaine thought it suited her.

“Told you I’d be here,” Marley smiled sweetly at him before greeting him with a kiss on his cheek and a hand on his arm that told him she was there for him.

He turned to introduce her to the others, noticing a stutter in her step when she went to kiss Dani hello and the girl’s interested glance. Blaine was sure his own smile was splitting his face in half. He would have to ask about it later.

He disentangled his arm from Kurt’s and walked beside Marley to catch up with her, letting the band talk songs and places and cues.

*

The event started with a flurry of activity, a generously sized crowd that cheered for the opening act and Kurt’s tongue down his throat.

Kurt had started by saying that if Blaine didn’t hold him in that exact moment he would combust, he would be unable to go out and perform. Then he had massaged Blaine’s scalp so nicely and when Blaine looked up at him, their lips instantly connected.

They were in a relatively secluded spot, waiting for One Three Hill to be called on stage so Blaine wasn’t as preoccupied as he could have been considering they were moments away from acting rather indecently in public.

“Should I bring the hose?” Elliot’s voice seemed far away; Blaine couldn’t be sure of what was happening around him with the way Kurt sucked on Blaine’s tongue.

“I think they’re sweet,” Dani’s comment was followed by a hearty chuckled from Marley. Blaine blocked their voices and took the time to appreciate his boyfriend’s hands on his waist, bringing them closer together.

At a particularly loud cheer from the crowd they separated, both of their lips bee stung, theirs chest heaving with exertion. Blaine looked around to find the other’s exasperated but gentle faces, Kurt’s beautiful one coming into view. He planted the most chaste of kisses on Blaine’s lips.

“Shit, we’re next,” Elliot grabbed Kurt’s arm and dragged him away from Blaine to get him to the stage. Kurt sent him a cheesy wink before exiting the tent.

Blaine and Marley followed them outside slowly, going to the area next to the stage reserved for guests and staff. They could see the band perfectly, taking their places, nodding to one another before Kurt introduced them and Elliot started them off with a song by A Great Big World.

Blaine made sure they cheered and clapped the loudest after every song, Marley even singing along next to him with her sweet voice. They had a good time, and the even the crowd seemed to like what they saw too.

There were a lot of flashes and whooping. Blaine felt so proud of Kurt – of everyone up there.

Marley teased him gently when the group sang a cheesy love song, leaded mostly by Dani but Kurt had a few lines and he took a few seconds to find Blaine’s eyes and sing to him

“Only you can set my heart on fire.”

When they finished their (much too short, in Blaine’s opinion) setlist it was really no surprise that the crowd cheered loudly and asked for more. Dani, Elliot and Kurt took their vows, let the band do the same, said thanks and skipped down the stage, huge grins and vibrating energy around them.

Kurt beelined for Blaine and hugged him tight, laughing, so pleased and amazed. They re-entered the tent for water and some snacks, Kurt’s arm safely across Blaine’s shoulders. They congratulated each other, raving about every detail. Marley was listening enraptured to a very excited Dani and Blaine’s heart melted.

“After party at mine’s!” hollered Elliot, earning himself high fives and whoops all around. Kurt told him they had more friends in the audience so they would get invited as well. It was natural to celebrate the band’s success.

They were getting ready to leave when Kurt pulled him aside, holding Blaine’s hands.

“I want to celebrate this,” Kurt told him softly, still radiating vibrant energy, but he was calmer now, his body language relaxed and exuding confidence, the way Blaine could only wish to be.

“Then let’s go, I might get overwhelmed, but you deserve it,” Blaine said honestly, he wanted more than anything to support his boyfriend.

“I want to celebrate,” Kurt repeated looking at Blaine with an intensity that had Blaine pinned to the ground. “But I don’t wanna go to Elliot’s place.”

A bell rang in Blaine’s mind, he was trying to understand, he was pretty sure he understood but still, it didn’t make sense even if it did. He waited for Kurt to explain, he could barely move.

“I wanna go to your house.”

[dyscrasia-eucrasia]

<<Prev | Next>>

Part 28 (NSFW)

"Absolutely not," Elaine said, folding her arms across her chest and leaning back in her chair. 

"Why not!?" Demie said. He was standing on the threshold to her room, gripping the door frame so that he could lean his head in without stepping foot inside the room. "Marius has an Instagram, I can have one, too. It's not like I'm gonna go around telling the whole world where to find me." 

"How are you even going to use it?" Elaine asked. 

"I can borrow your computer while you're at work." 

"Absolutely not. Besides, you can't even post to Instagram unless you have a phone." 

"So, maybe it's time I get a phone, then." 

Elaine scoffed. "With what money? And we don't even have wifi, we have fucking satellite internet." 

"You can sell some of my dad's vinyls on eBay. And I'll only use it when we go into towns for shows." 

"No."

Demie let out a frustrated noise. He'd been a bit excited after talking to Angel about Instagram. He figured it was about time for him to learn how to use the internet, if he was going to be showing up in someone else's pictures. Maybe interacting with people through a screen would give him a chance to get more comfortable with people. It seemed to be working with Angel - they could talk for hours over the phone, and he felt safe in Angel's presence. 

"I can't have fucking anything!" He exclaimed, turning and slamming the side of his fist against the wood paneling of the hallways. 

"Don't you fucking punch my walls!" Elaine shouted after him as he stomped across the living room towards his room. 

"Fucking bitch," he grumbled as he stepped into his room and slammed the door behind him. Not that he was necessarily mad at her. She was right, after all - she worked two jobs just to keep the lights on and food in the fridge, and he knew that she spent most of her budget on food for him and the goats. She said she liked TV dinners and instant noodles, but he also knew how happy she got when she could afford to bring home an expensive steak. 

At least she wasn't arguing that he was irresponsible. Since the festival - which he assumed she believed he went to, primarily because he'd lied and said he'd let Angel keep any photos he would've taken - she had eased up a little on the protectiveness. He could tell that she still worried, but she seemed to be coming around to Angel, little by little. 

Though, he wondered if it had anything to do with the fact that the night of the festival, Marius had called and asked to talk to Elaine. She'd gone into her room and closed the door for their conversation, and when she came out she was in a better mood than Demie had seen in months. 

Speaking of phones…

The handset for the landline was in his room from the last time he'd called Angel. He'd called to celebrate that his pregnant goat had given birth, to a sweet grey kid with black socks. The goatling had been the impetus for him finally asking Elaine about getting Instagram - he'd taken some Polaroids, but had no way to share them with Angel. 

He picked up the phone and dialed Angel's number from memory. Angel picked up before the second ring. 

"Hey, what's up?" Angel asked. He was all bubbly and cheerful, and Demie couldn't help but smile a little. 

"Elaine said no to Instagram," Demie said. 

"Aaaaah no, that sucks," Angel replied. "Did she say why?" 

"She can't afford to get me a phone. And we don't have wireless internet." 

"Shit, that sucks," Angel said. "That's too bad, because those guys finally posted the pictures of you." 

"Yeah?" 

"Yeah, they posted the close-ups of your horns. They got a lot of likes, lots of people asking in the comments where they can buy horns like that," Angel said, then laughed. "There's this one pic that has your eyes in it, and it looks so intense and artistic. Maybe I should see if I can convince these guys to take some pictures of me." 

"Well, uh… the tall one seemed to like you a lot," Demie said. He wasn't really sure what he was saying, the words just sort of tumbled out of his mouth. "Maybe he could, like, be your boyfriend." 

He cringed at the words. Not so much at the idea of two guys dating - once again, he told himself that he wasn't homophobic - but more at the idea of Angel dating… well, anyone. Demie didn't have any real relationship experience, but he definitely felt that if Angel started dating someone, he'd see a lot less of him. Considering that Angel was only the second friend he'd ever had, he didn't really want to compete for his attention. 

"Who, Dylan?" Angel said with a laugh. "Oh, honey, no, Dylan is painfully straight." 

Demie felt like he'd been kicked in the sternum. The wind just all went out of his lungs. He wasn't really sure what he was feeling. He felt a little sick, but also oddly relieved, which made him feel even worse. What did he care that there was no chance Angel would date Dylan? Why did he want to be the only person Angel paid attention to? 

"So, what's up with you? How's the baby goat?" 

"Oh, um," Demie struggled to find his voice again. "He's fine. He's kind of needy, everytime I go outside he screams at me until I pick him up and carry him around." 

"Awwwww. Hey, could I come see him sometime? I would die to pick up a baby goat." 

"Um… yeah. Yeah, sure." 

"Great! I'm doing a Burlesque show at a bar in town on Wednesday, but I could drive out to your place on Thursday afternoon?" 

"Yeah. Yeah, that's fine. I mean, I'm always here." Demie's face went hot at the thought of seeing Angel again. He told himself to calm down, that it was normal for friends to visit. 

But he'd never had friends come visit. That this would be Angel's third time driving all the way out to Billy Brook meant that he actually enjoyed spending time with Demie. 

"Great! You can cook for me again, I can't stop thinking about those tomato things you made last time." 

"Y-yeah. Okay." Demie squirmed, suddenly feeling a little uncomfortable as he sat on the bed. 

"Who taught you how to cook, by the way?" 

"M-my grandma." 

"Oh yeah, I could tell. There's just something about grandparents' recipes, like there's all those generations of culture and family and love and stuff… Whenever we visited my grandparents, my grandma would spend all day cooking and--" 

Demie's head was swimming, and he was hardly paying attention to what Angel was saying. He wondered why he was light-headed all of a sudden, when he glanced down at his lap. His dick had slid out of its sheath and was half-hard. 

"Oh, fuck--" He murmured. 

"Hello?" Angel said. "You okay over there?" 

"Yeah-- yeah, I um, I gotta go." 

"Oh. Okay. We're still on for Thursday, right?" 

"Yeah. Yeah, sure. Bye." 

"Byeee--" Angel said, but Demie hung up the phone before Angel could finish the word. 

He flopped down onto his back, breathing heavily. He'd gotten random boners before, but never while talking to a guy. Not like he had a lot of experience talking to guys, outside of his cousins. 

He exhaled through his nose, taking hold of his dick. He closed his eyes and started rubbing himself. It was almost mechanical. He was confused. He was turned on, but couldn't figure out why. This had been happening more and more often. He wondered if this was a part of reaching adulthood for satyrs. After all, myth said his people were extremely sexually active. His parents had both passed away when he was young, without giving him the birds and the bees talk, and Marius had always seemed uncomfortable with talking about sex. So he didn't really have any frame of reference. 

He was in the middle of stroking himself when the door to his room opened. 

"Hey, we need to have a talk about you using the phone all the ti-- JESUS FUCK!" Elaine exclaimed, suddenly drawing back out of the doorway. 

"GODS!" Demie shouted, sitting up and dragging a sheet over his dick. "FUCKING KNOCK!" 

"STOP CALLING YOUR BUTT BUDDY EVERY FUCKING DAY, YOU'RE RACKING UP THE PHONE BILL!" Elaine shouted, her voice getting further away as she was clearly headed back towards her room. 

Demie's breath came out as loud snorts. He had two thoughts in his head: first, that he was still hard despite the interruption; and second, that he had no intention of reducing his calls to Angel, so he probably had to find some way to pay Elaine back for the phone bill.

[thetravelerwrites]

Ironblood Interspecies Daycare

Rating: Teen Relationship: Male Orc x Female Human Additional Tags: Exophilia, Orc boyfriend, Daycare, POV First Person, First Person Perspective, Male Reader Content Warnings: Kids, Children, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Worth Issues, Disowned Words: 5035

An orc running a daycare takes on a new employee and feels an immediate attraction to her, having to struggle with his own feelings of inadequacy to get close to her. Commission for @ban23​. 

The Traveler's Masterlist

You might think that running a daycare would be a weird job for an orc, but orcs are a clan-oriented people. Caring for and watching over the young is sort of ingrained in our nature. I couldn’t imagine doing anything else.

Of course, since my daycare is open to all species, we have quite a few kids. There are a lot of human-only care centers, orc-only, fae-only, and so on. They’re usually pricey and exclusive, so an interspecies daycare that takes lower income families was a boon to the community.

Unfortunately, we couldn’t take all the kids whose parents applied, which made me feel terrible. According to the law, there had to be one care worker per five children, and I only had four employees plus myself. I was hoping to expand, but I was having trouble finding more caregivers.

It wasn’t for a lack of wanting to pay more people, it was more a lack of experience. I didn’t hire weekend babysitters; I only hired people with professional experience in child care, whether it’s a degree or a teaching position or several years of homecare, like a nanny or au pair, accompanied with references that were nothing short of glowing. Just because these children came from poor families was no reason to think they deserved anything less than the best.

Thankfully, there was a new applicant with a degree in child psychology with a special focus on interspecies relations, and spent four years as a school counselor. She was also a registered nurse. She sounded perfect, and if hiring her meant we could take more kids, then that was all the better.

I had scheduled her interview after close of the business day, when all the kids had gone home. I always tried to be in the back when the parents arrived; some of the moms were… handsy.

After closing, the five of us gathered in the back area for coffee and so the others could grab their personal belongings to go home.

“Ms. Jones keeps asking if you’re single,” Jacob said as he grabbed his things from his personal cubby.

“Mrs. Peterson, too,” Said Emily, wrapping a scarf around her neck. “I swear she’s gonna start camping out near the front door to ambush you when you leave.”

“Please, Karen from the grocery store has been leaving notes with her weekly fees. I keep giving them to Jukah and he keeps throwing them away.”

“They’re wildly inappropriate and very graphic,” I said, sipping coffee and looking over invoices.

“Really? Oh, damn,” Jacob said. “If that’s the case, I’m going to keep them from now on, then. I’m not above living vicariously.”

“Why don’t you ask one of them out, Jukah? They’re clearly into you, and there’s no shortage of options,” Emily asked, putting on her coat. She was the only other person besides me who worked here that wasn’t human. She was a bright blue kobold with dark spikes along her jaw and two sets of horns. Her tail was smooth, however, and dragged the ground when she walked. She often let the smaller children ride on it to make them laugh.

“They’re too pushy,” I replied dismissively.

“I thought orcs liked pushy women,” She said.

“That’s a gross stereotype and you’re wrong for saying it,” You said playfully. “Different orcs have different tastes, just like everyone. I don’t push you toward every buff bodybuilder I see, do I?”

“Gross,” Emily said, her face scrunched up.

“See? Because I know you like skinny weirdos,” I told her, laughing.

She laughed too. “You’re right. I can’t even lie about it.”

“So what kind of woman do you like?” Esther asked me. She was the grandma of my employees, having been a pediatric nurse for decades and started working at the daycare because she refused to retire.

“Why are you people so interested in my love life all of a sudden?” I protested.

“Because it’s weird that all these women are literally throwing themselves at you and you’re not interested in even trying with one of them,” Kody said. Kody was non-binary and was a big help in teaching the kids to be respectful to each other.

“I keep my work life and my personal life separate,” I said simply. “End of story.”

To be honest, I really didn’t know why these women found me so appealing. By orc standards, I was considered extremely ugly. I’m about a foot and a half too short for an orc, and even though all orcs are born with a natural muscle tone, I was way too skinny. My tusks are too small, though that’s actually fine for my line of work. I even file down and cap them, just to be sure I don’t accidentally gore a kid when I pick them up. I don’t wear my hair long the way other orcs do, in braids or plaits; I keep it short so the kids can’t pull on it. I even catch flack because of my eye color, a flat turquoise, which is exceedingly rare among orcs.

It wasn’t just my looks that made me unusual among my people. I’d grown up in a typical stronghold, but I’m quiet, introverted, and self-conscious. I’ve never felt the same sort of personal pride that other orcs feel in being an orc. I don’t hunt or fight or spend my time in other typical orcish pursuits. Timidness and a lack hubris are seen as personality defects for my people. In the eyes of other orcs, I might as well be human, and that’s in no way a compliment.

My only redeeming features were my skin, which was the deep, dark forest green found most attractive among my kind, and my natural ability and instinct to care for and teach the young, which is a high priority in orcish culture. That’s probably the only reason I wasn’t thrown out before I came of age. When I was old enough, however, I left the stronghold with no intent to return, and I’ve never regretted that decision.

So, these womens’ attention, especially the more aggressive ones, is baffling to me. I’m nothing special, in fact, I’m downright substandard, so this new-found attention was jarring.

“Just think about it, man,” Emily said. “You’re a nice guy. It’s a shame for you to be alone.”

“Guys, seriously, stop worrying about me. I don’t need to have a girlfriend to be happy. Now git,” I said, waving my hands. “I have an interview to conduct in thirty minutes.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Kody said. “Whatever you say, Boss.”

I shooed them out and started cleaning up the play area. I enjoyed the time alone in the daycare after work. It gave me time to think about ways of improving the atmosphere for the kids. It was always good to have new things for them to do or they’d get bored and tear the place apart.

I heard the front door open as I was stacking tiny chairs and a voice say, “Hi. Are you Jukah Ironblood?”

“Yes, I am. Can I help you?” I called over my shoulder without turning.

“I’m Briauna Ramos, I’m here for the interview.”

“Oh!” I said more animatedly. “Of course, come in, I’ll be right with you, let me just finish up here.”

“No hurry,” She said pleasantly, closing the door.

I picked up the last of the chairs, stacked them, and turned. And stopped in my tracks.

The woman standing patiently at the door with a expectant smile on her face was petite with thick thighs and a cute little belly, wearing a flowing yellow top with black jean leggings that did nothing to hide these features. Her skin was a deep brown and her amber-colored eyes were wide, framed in long, black lashes. Her hair was silky, wavy, a little fluffy, and fell to her shoulders. She wore a small barrette in the shape of a bee to keep it out of her eyes.

She was the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen in my entire goddamn life.

“Something wrong?” She asked, her eyebrows drawing together in concern.

I realized I’d been standing with my mouth open for about a solid minute and shut it so quickly that my teeth clicked.

“No, sorry, um… please,” I said, gesturing at the door to my office. Once there, I sat at my desk and motioned for her to take the chair on the opposite side. She lay her coat over the back and sat down, pressing her her cold fingers together and putting them between her thighs to warm them. I tried my best not to stare at her thighs. I wanted to put my own hands between them and feel how warm…

I mentally slapped myself back into reality. Stop it.

Her application was on the desk in front of me, and I riffled through the papers for a moment to collect my thoughts.

“You come highly recommended,” I said, attempting to keep my voice even. “Your references and credentials are incredible.”

“Thanks,” She said. “I’ve wanted to work in childcare my whole life. Working at the school was okay, but I actually didn’t have all that much to do. Most kids who need a counseling are already in therapy, and there wasn’t much need for a nurse most of the time, so I spent hours in my office with nothing to do. I want to work more directly with children. This daycare seems like a perfect place, especially since it caters to lower income families. They deserve the same degree of care as private facilities.”

I felt myself smile. “I completely agree. That’s why I only hire the best. And you’re pretty close to perfect for this job.”

She smiled with her whole face, and I found it hard to breathe. “Thanks. I’ve applied at a few places, but I like this place the most. The facility is large and clean, and the list of activities for the kids is diverse and stimulating. You seem like you really care about kids.”

“I do,” I said. “Providing a safe environment for them is my first priority.” I looked through her papers again. “We have a former nurse on our staff, but she’s no longer practicing, so your nursing status is great. We get all kinds of bumps and scrapes here.”

“I can imagine,” She laughed.

“Well,” I said with a tired sigh. “I’m satisfied with your experience and I think you’d be a good fit here. When would you like to start?”

“Well, I just moved to the area, and I’m getting my apartment unpacked. How about Monday?”

I nodded. “Sounds good to me.” I stood and held out my hand for a handshake. “Welcome to the team.”

She took my hand, shaking firmly, and it was like an electric shock passed from her into me, making my whole body tingle. I gulped and tried to keep my professional demeanor in place.

“Great, I can’t wait to start,” She said enthusiastically as she pulled her hand away and threw her purse over her shoulder. “I’ll see you Monday, Mr. Ironblood.”

“Oh, just Jukah, please. Formality goes out the window pretty quick in this place,” I said, laughing.

She laughed with me. I could listen to that laugh all day.

“Thanks again,” She said, and left. Despite my best efforts, I couldn’t help sneaking a peek at her ample rear as she walked away. I said down heavily at my desk and tried to calm myself.

Well, shit. So much for keeping my personal and professional lives separate.

She arrived early on Monday morning, before the others got in, and you had a few minutes to show her around.

“This is your personal cubby,” I told her, showing her a cubby on the lower shelf. “You can keep your phone with you in the common area, but try to use it as little as possible. If you have to take a phone call, either come back here or go outside.”

“Gotcha,” She said. She was wearing a powder blue sundress and darker blue leggings with her hair in a tight, fluffy ponytail two tendrils of hair hanging on either side of her face. She looked adorable.

The others wandered in shortly after the two of us put our things away and I introduced all of them. They greeted her politely and engaged her in light conversation, asking where she was from and how she was liking town so far, as they started on the coffee and pastries I brought in for them every day.

I had about fifteen minutes before the daycare opened, so I went to the waitlist to notify the families at the top that I could take them. A couple of people had already found accommodations, but the ones who hadn’t were overjoyed, two of them even asking if they could fill out the intake paperwork that day.

A paper plate with a pastry and a cup of coffee was placed in front of me. I looked up, and Briauna winked and smiled at me before returning to the back room.

Oh, god. This was bad. Love at first sight doesn’t exist, I told myself. She’s pretty and sweet, sure, but this is just an infatuation. Don’t even think about it. Didn’t you just tell your team that you didn’t need a girlfriend to be happy? Besides, dating a co-worker is always a bad idea. She probably wouldn’t be into you, anyway. Just get a grip and let it go.

The children began arriving, and I was out front to greet them, dodging the over-eager mothers as best I could. Kody, Emily, Jacob, Esther, and Briauna came out of the back when they heard the children’s voices. They quickly fell into their roles, including Briauna, helping the kids take off their jackets and instructing them to put their shoes and lunches in their cubbies.

I’d say only a third of the kids were human. The rest were a mix of orcs, fae, beast creatures, and even a little half-demon girl. Most of the children were between the ages of two and five, though we did have a couple that were under two years old, and they were mostly Esther’s responsibility. She was the best at handling the babies.

“Okay, little ones, sit in the circle and play the quiet game for a minute,” I said to the group, and they scrambled to find a spot in the big, red sitting circle in the middle of the room. “We’ve got a brand new friend who’s going to be helping us out from now on. Her name is Briauna.”

Briauna waved at them and said, “Nice to meet you!”

“I want you guys to be nice to her,” I continued, “And stay on your very best behavior, okay?”

“Yes, Kah-Kah,” said the chorus of little voices.

“Kah-Kah?” Briauna asked in an undertone. “That must go over well with the Spanish-speaking parents.”

I grinned. “We’ve all got nicknames. Emily is Emmy, Jacob is Jay-Jay, Esther is Essa, and Kody… well, Kody doesn’t have a nickname, but theirs is easy to pronounce, even for the littler ones. Just wait, I’m sure you’ll have your own by the end of the day.”

Sure enough, the children had started calling Briauna Na-Na by lunchtime.

“Told you,” I said as we began laying them down for their afternoon naps. She grinned at me with the tip of her tongue between her teeth. I felt like slapping myself after wondering what that tongue might feel like on mine.

Naptime was when we took lunch. One of us was assigned to sit with the kids as they slept so that the others could eat, and there was a rotating schedule. Today was Kody’s day. I made a note to add Briauna to the schedule later.

“So, how was your first day?” I asked her over my club sandwich.

“Amazing,” She said. “It’s exactly what I was hoping for.”

“Yeah, the kids are great,” Emily said. “They almost make the pay worth it.” She grinned and stuck her forked tongue out of me. I reached out and whacked her spiny shoulder lightly.

“I wish I could pay all of you more,” I said a little regretfully. “We’re applying for low income care grant for businesses that involve children, and when the grant comes through, I’m hoping I can give you all bonuses.”

“Bonuses,” Jacob, Emily, and Esther all said in unison, like zombies.

Briauna shook her head and laughed softly. “Honestly, I don’t care about the money. Today was probably the best day of my professional career. If I didn’t need to eat, I’d do it for free. It’s exactly what I’ve always wanted. Kids deserve a good start, no matter who or what they are, or where they come from. I’m so happy to help do that for them.”

I stared at her in an awed silence, feeling as if my heart had taken up all the space in my chest, leaving no room for my lungs. There was no point in lying to myself anymore: I was head over heels in love with this woman.

I forced myself to look away from her, and ended up glancing at my other three co-workers, who had sudden knowing smirks on their faces. I scowled at them and lowered my eyes, eating to occupy my mouth so I wouldn’t have to answer questions.

Walking home that evening, I couldn’t stop thinking about her. I knew myself well enough to know I’d never have the courage to just ask her out. I’ve never been that confident. All of my exes had asked me out, not the other way around. I thought about having someone ask her out for me, but I shook the thought out of my head with a grimace. This wasn’t high school. I was a goddamn adult and running my own business. I should be able to ask her out without a buffer.

Thinking that was easy, doing it was another thing entirely.

As I passed a novelty store, I stopped and looked in the window. There was a very tiny stuffed deer sitting in a little gift bag with chocolates cookies.

I stood there, staring at the stuffed deer. In the old days, orcs wanting to charm a mate would go through a courting ritual which usually involved hunting large game, like bears and deer and the like. I definitely wasn’t the hunting type, but… the point was to show your adoration through gifts, to show what you can provide for your mate. I certainly didn’t intend to leave dead animal on her doorstep, but I did want to offer her affection and companionship.

I ducked into the novelty store and bought the gift bag without really thinking about it. And now that I had it, I had no idea how to present it to her. I couldn’t just give it to her during work in front of the others; I was too self-conscious. I hadn’t seen her anywhere outside of work, so I couldn’t “accidentally” bump into her someplace else. I wasn’t going to show up at her house unannounced like a goddamn creep. I sighed, hoping I’d figure it out.

The next day, I was sure to get in before everyone else and hide the gift in my desk. As it happened, that day was my day to sit with the children during naptime. After the kids were sleeping and everyone went into the back room for lunch, I snuck quietly into my office, retrieved the gift, and slipped it into one of Briauna’s coat pockets.

After naptime, Briauna took out a book she’d brought from her own home and had all the little ones sitting in a semi-circle around her. She was naturally gifted at holding their attention. Well, not just theirs. I couldn’t stop staring at her.

I had put a high precedent on early education, so lessons on shapes, colors, numbers, and letters were a weekly thing. Not enough that it overloaded their still developing brains, but just enough to keep them engaged and help them retain the knowledge. We often did a flash card game with a points system, and the winner got a reward from the toy chest.

“You’re going to scare the kids if you keep making faces at Briauna like that,” Kody told me as they looked over the children’s worksheets.

I scoffed. “What are you talking about?”

Kody gave me a deadpan look. “Come on, man. I’m not blind. You’ve been staring at her all day. Hell, you practically drool. You’re really going to act like you’re not attracted to her?”

“Just drop it.”

Kody raised their hands in surrender, their eyebrows shooting up to their hairline. “Fine, fine.” They shook their head at you. “You’re a hot mess, you know that?”

“I’m more than aware, thank you,” I told them. Again, they shook their head and wandered off to set out the art supplies for creative time.

They rest of the day passed without incident. Briauna pulled on her coat without checking her pockets. I watched her with my heart in my throat as she left with the others. Kody shot me a meaningful look before following her out of the door.

The next morning, she came in with the giftbag in her hand.

“Who left this in my coat?” She asked.

“That was in your coat?” Emily said. “There’s no note or anything?”

“No, I found it in my pocket when I got home,” She said. “I thought maybe one of the kids put it in there, but the price tag on the bottom said it was, like, twenty bucks, and I don’t think toddlers keep that kind of cash on them.”

I winced internally. I’ll have to remember to take the tag off next time. I’d never done this before, so some mistakes were bound to happen. I’d have to be more careful in the future.

“So, which one of you gave me this? Jacob?”

Jacob snorted. “Girl, you cute and all, but I’m gay as the day is long. It was one of them,” He said, gesturing at the rest of us.

“Not me,” Kody, Esther, and Emily said in unison.

“What about you, Boss?” Emily asked.

I tried my best to look affronted. “Please, I spend enough money on coffee and donuts for you losers every day.”

“So, none of you are going to own up to this?” Briauna said. “Really?”

“Hell, maybe it was one of the kids, you don’t know,” Emily said.

Briauna rolled her eyes. “You guys are impossible.”

“You like it,” Kody said, grinning.

Two days later, a teddy bear and some caramels found their way into her pockets. A week after that, there was a stuffed tiger and gourmet hard candies.

On her day to sit with the kids at naptime, I brought her a coffee, and she whispered, “Who do you think is leaving me the presents?”

“Dunno,” I said. “Could be any of them, really. Well, except Jacob.”

“Not you, though,” She asked shrewdly.

“I’m your boss,” I said. “Wouldn’t that be inappropriate?”

“I guess,” She said, shrugging. “But I thought you said formalities went out the window here.”

I gulped my heart down. Thankfully for my slowly crumbling facade of professionalism, the soft bell that alerted the end of naptime went off, and it was time to get the kids up for afternoon playtime outside.

That evening, while I was alone in my office, I was going through this months invoices while also looking at edible fruit and chocolate arrangements on my phone, when I saw my office door open. Kody stood there, leaning on the doorframe with their arms crossed.

Putting my phone face down and fixing a neutral expression on my face, I said, “What’s up?”

“Dude, do you really think I don’t know what you’re doing?” They said.

“I’m filing invoices,” I said.

“Come on, man, you know what I’m talking about. I know you’re the one leaving Briauna the gifts. Esther’s married, I’m asexual, and Briauna’s not Emily’s type. It has to be you. You’re not that slick.”

I sighed. I knew they’d caught me. “Are you going to tell Briauna?”

“No,” They said. “You are.”

“I can’t,” I said, scrubbing my face with my hands.

“And why not?”

“A lot of reasons,” I replied, reclining in my chair.

“Name one,” They said.

“I’m… weird.”

Kody laughed. “We’re all weird, Jukah.”

“It’s...” You sighed. “I doubt she’d even be into me. I’ve got… a lot of baggage, and not everyone is strong enough or willing to carry it with me. Trust me, I know. Every girlfriend I’ve had has seemed to buckle under the weight.”

“So you’re saying she’s not enough for you?”

“No!” I retorted, sitting up. “I’m saying I’m not enough for her. This place,” I gestured at the walls. “It’s all I’ve got. I’ve got no family, no friends besides my co-workers, no life outside of my work. Hell, I don’t even have my health. I’m a shit excuse for an orc. I mean, I’m too damn shy to ask a girl out. What does that tell you?”

“Maybe she likes shy guys,” Kody argued.

“Orcs aren’t supposed to be shy,” I said with a scowl.

Kody sighed in frustration. “Why are you so obsessed with what orcs are ‘supposed’ to be like?”

“You don’t understand, Kody,” I said with a return sigh. “I grew up in a stronghold, a traditional one. The pressure they put upon us to be the best orc possible was suffocating. I wasn’t the only one who who had to deal with it, but I was the only one who couldn’t live up to the expectation, the only one who didn’t grow up into the orc I should have been, and that has severe repercussions in orc communities. I was my stronghold’s biggest shame. None of my family speaks to me. My clan won’t even acknowledge my existence anymore; I’ve literally been erased from the book of clan lineages.”

“Dude… I do get it,” Kody said. “When I told my family that I was non-binary, asexual, wasn’t planning on having kids, wasn’t a Christian, and had no intention of taking over their business, they fucking lost it. I was their only kid and they had placed all their expectations for the future on me without asking me how I felt about it. They kicked me out, cut off my tuition, wrote me out of their will, refused to see me or take my calls. I went from working on a degree in medicine to living on a park bench. You were the one who gave me a chance. You gave all of us a chance.” They came in and laid a hand on my shoulder. “I don’t really give a shit what other orcs think of you, and you shouldn’t either. You’re worth so much more than they’d want you to believe.”

“Thanks, Kody,” I said. “It’s hard to undo an entire lifetime of being told you’re not enough.”

“I know,” They replied. “But do you really think Briauna is the kind of person who would think that? And if you do, why would you want to be with someone who does?”

“I don’t think she’s like that,” I said. “That’s one of the reasons I like her.”

“Then ask her out.”

I sighed sharply and ducked my head. “What if she says no and things are awkward, and she decides it’s too weird to work here? I’d have to kick out all the new kids we just took in,” I shook my head, resolved “I can’t do that. The kids come first.”

Kody groaned and rolled their eyes. “God, you are insufferable!” They walked to the door and leaned out. “Would you please come in here and put him out of my misery?”

To my complete shock and horror, Briauna walked in with a sheepish smile on her face.

I stared at Kody in disbelief. “Wow… you are… just… so fired.”

“Please, you need me,” They said, backing out of the room. “I’m basically your conscience.”

“You are the exact opposite of that thing.”

They laughed as they made to exit the building. “You kids have fun.”

Briauna stood there with one of the stuffed animals in her hands. “So it was you, then?”

I stood up and raked my hands through my hair. “Yeah. Sorry.”

“Why are you sorry? It was sweet. A little creepy, but mostly sweet.”

I snorted. “I wasn’t trying to be creepy. I just wanted to get your attention.”

“Well, it worked.” She reached into her pocket and pulled out a little stuffed bunny, something I hadn’t given her, and held it out to me. “Would this be enough to get your attention?”

I laughed and took it. “Yeah. And… maybe… dinner when you’re free?”

“I’m free now,” She said. “And there’s a curry place I’ve been dying to try since I moved here, but I’ve never had the chance to go.”

“That sounds perfect,” I said, grabbing my coat.

“Kody’s right, you know,” She said as I opened the door for her, stepping out into the chilly winter evening. “You shouldn’t care what people think about you. Well, except for me.”

“And what do you think about me?” I asked her.

She put her arm around my waist. “I think you’re really cute. I did the day we met. I was hoping the gift giver was you. And I think shy guys are adorable.” She lay her head on my chest. She was a short little thing. “I’m also hoping you won’t be too shy to kiss me goodnight.

I put my arm around her shoulder in return and lifted her face with my other hand. I kissed her softly and she pressed into it, parting her lips as if asking for more. My tongue reach out to toy with hers, and she moaned into my mouth. I pulled away, licking my lips.

“Dinner first,” I said, smiling.

She snorted. “You might regret that. It is curry.”

“I’ll take my chances,” I said, leading her down the street.

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My Masterlist

The Exophilia Creator’s Masterlist

[destielisbaeandgay]

Destiel is Everywhere

I was at a Theme Park the other day and as we were walking through we passed this weird truck ride. It was just these different numbered trucks that would go round a little track and they had these horns that when you pressed them it would make a stupidly loud, high-pitched beep. So obviously, kids being kids, this one boy on the ride was holding the beep button for ages so all everyone could hear was this high pitched noise blaring from the truck. Me being well, me, shouted to myself over the noise

"The Angels are calling!"

And I was just expecting no one to hear me or even care what I'd said and even my (non-supernatural) friends all gave me weird looks. But this one guy turned around after I'd said it, looked up at the sky and just yelled really loudly.

"Shut the hell up Cas! Your boyfriend isn't here!"

And I swear to god I was so shocked and he just looked down at me and grinned, so I asked him "Boyfriend as in Dean?"

And he just grinned even wider and replied. "Honey, dinners ready. I made you sandwiches and washed the Impala. I caught a bee today." And just slowly walked into the crowd.

So there you go. Just thought I'd share my great experience. Destiel is everywhere 😂