#Hope to upload something new this weekend though.

[writersblockedx]

Winters Protection

Pairing - Bodyguard!Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader Summary - When Alexander Piece's daughter begins to rebel, he assigns The Winter Solider as her personal bodyguard.  Warnings - Mentions of violence and death

A/n - I haven't uploaded to tumblr for a long while, but I hope you still enjoy this, I'm likely to make a part two as well! Also happy new year all!

Masterlist

It had become a game. One of which you were known to win far too often. Slipping away from the security detail when they were too busy smoking a cigarette outside, running across the bustling streets of nighttime Brooklyn as you and your friends headed to some niche bar they wouldn't find you. Maybe you had been stupid to think you could continue to get away with it without your father finding out.

It almost should have been expected that night. The early morning sun cast across your rustic, downtown apartment as your intoxicated self stumbled with the key. When you pushed the door open, dark figures stared back at you. Only personalised when you switched at the light and found your father sitting with a class of neat whisky at the breakfast bar. Stood behind him was a broad-shouldered man. One of which you had to assume was another bodyguard. Until your gaze flickered down to the metallic shine of his left arm: The Winter Solider.

Your focus turned to your father first. "Dad?" His name left your tongue with uncertainty as you drew closer into your own home. "What is this?"

He was slow, unusually calm considering the situation. You had been through this enough to know that meant he was truly mad. A part of you wondered if he was about to let his pet loose on you, teach you a lesson you wouldn't forget. "You we're out, all night, no bodyguards, doing god knows what with who knows. I come to learn this is-" He takes a sharp inhale as to calm his furious tone. "This is happening every single weekend. How stupid are you, little girl?"

You kept quiet as he stepped from his seat, downing the rest of the whisky from the expensive glass. "You can't be trusted, do you understand?"

"Look, Dad, I just wanted-"

A harsh throw. Then a clash. Glass flying left, right and center. Your breath caught in your throat before you could even feel the blood dripping from your cheek. But you weren't worried about your torn skin, but rather the thousand-pound glass he had let shatter without a second thought. 

"You are in no position to speak back, right now." You kept your lips sealed and your eyes dry despite the tears which fought to escape. "It's become evident to me you have no desire for your own safety. You are naive enough to flaunt around this city in your short little skirts with no concern for our enemies. If you weren't family, you would be dead." Such a phrase echoed across your mind, sure to keep you awake.

"So, now, you have him." He wandered around to where the Winter Solider had yet to move from, his eyes dark and brooding. "24/7, ensure you don't do anything stupid again."

You rushed up, panic in your eyes. 24/7. No more nights that swept into the morning. No more privacy. Nothing. "Please, I'll stop, I'll be more careful. I'll stop ditching the security detail. But I don't need your science project to look after me."

He stared down. For a moment you thought he might throw something else at the wall. Luckily, he wasn't holding onto anything anymore. "It's too late for that." His gaze turned to the man. "Clean it up."

In an instant, the soldier was moving. Gathering the glass in his bare hands from the floor. A hand fell on your bleeding cheek, forcing you to face your father. "I do this because I love you." Though, you found such hard to believe.

A breath of relief fell from your lips which his touch left your skin. Your eyes not moving to the floor as you listened to the door open and then shut, leaving you under the protection of the Winter Solider. It was in that moment, your body gave in. Tears flooded from your eyes, your knees shook and you forced your body onto the sofa. The distant sound of glass in the background not stopping your hands from meeting your face.

You hadn't been sure how long had passed. Only that when you uncovered your face from your hands, the soldier was facing you with a first aid kit. You watched him carefully as he took out a wipe and some stitches. The wipe hit your wound with a sting that lingered. Enough to cause your hand to grip his wrist, forcing him to a stop. "I've got it." You grumbled, taking the supplies for yourself.

He was still silent. A nod of recognition before he continued to clean the floor. You were left to your tears, cleaning the wound and forcing your body through the pain. You had no care for the man, barely such, that you left in your kitchen that night. From the stories you had heard, you should have been more concerned about the monster cleaning up broken glass. Yet, he now served to protect you - as much as it pissed you off.

You somehow found yourself soundly sleeping off the argument, the intoxication and the pain. No worries for the man, no hospitality. You hadn't even wandered where he slept. However, you had questioned whether he did need sleep. The Winter Solider seemed almost robotic. He obeyed orders from the highest command. Even if that meant being stuck in Alexander Pierce's eldest daughter's apartment, ensuring she wasn't going to sneak out.

It confused your senses when you awoke to the smell of food. The distant sound of the cooker crackling. It pulled you out of bed, in nothing but an oversized t-shirt to find the soldier cooking breakfast rather than pulling men in half. "What- erm" You wiped your tired eyes. "What are you doing?"

He didn't even look away when he answered, "Orders."

 "And they are?"

He severed up the simple plate of scrambled eggs on toast before turning to you, plate in hand. "Care for you, ensure your safety, whatever means necessary."

With a furrowed brow, you took the plate. You couldn't deny the smell was inviting. "And that includes cooking me breakfast?"

"A night of intoxication. Carbs help." He informed.

Despite your confusion, you sat at the breakfast bar and began eating, trying to ignore the murderer who stood across from you. Only a moment passed before he spoke up, "Where is the bathroom?"

You pointed up, "First door on the left." And you watched, even more confused as the man's back turned to you, disappearing up the stairs. It only took a minute before the sound of the shower could be heard; guess your father wasn't lying about the 24/7 bodyguard.

It had yet to hit you how much your life truly was about to change until later on. As was usual, you were ready to head into town. Not for a bar-hopping trip, or a late-night date, just coffee with a friend. Something simple, something that your father once deemed safe. Yet as you headed for your front door, walking right passed the soldier, he stood. His voice forcing you to look from your phone screen, "Where are you going?"

You had been so close to slipping away. "Out." Your words were followed with a shrug. "I'll not be long."

In between the time of responding to the message and looking back again, the winter solider had acquired a leather jacket and a pair of gloves. "You don't have to come with me. I'm just meeting a friend." You almost laughed at the thought of needing a bodyguard for coffee.

"It's orders." He repeated.

You should have expected this from my dad. "Really? I'll be safe, alright?"

"If you want to request me to not join, you're going to have to call pierc- your father."

You dreaded nothing more in that moment. You knew what his answer would be. Some long, metaphoric lecture, and you'd still be faced with the answer of no. "Fine, just erm-" You looked him over. "Be subtle, please."

He nodded before trailing behind you as you headed out onto the streets of Brooklyn. A few eyes followed you and the brooding man who didn't leave your side, didn't speak, yet seemed like he was awaiting something. Ready to pounce at any sign of danger. He wasn't like any of your past bodyguards. He wasn't scrolling through hinge in the meantime, nor was he yearning for a cigarette. He was here for a job and it seemed as if nothing was going to stop him. 

By the time you reached the quaint coffee shop, you spotted your friend already sipping a brewing drink in the window. A smile grazed your lips as you looked back at the soldier. "You're not coming in are you?"

The expression you faced suggested you had no choice, "It's-"

"Order. Yeah, I get it." You finished for the man before a sigh fell from your lips as you pulled at the door. "Just, maybe sit a few tables away from us, please?" You begged and such was responded with nothing but a silent nod.

"Finally!" Called your friend as she stood from the wooden table, her eyes still lingering over the muscular man at your side. "And who is this?" She was seconds away from laying her hands around his biceps.

"New security detail." You answered with nothing but a stern expression.

Her brow raised, "To watch over you while we get coffee and talk shit?" Even she seemed to find it laughable. She was used to joining their nights out with unknown men looking out for you. But this was different, it was a whole lot more intense. And, quite frankly, getting on your nerves. 

"Let's just say my dad got tired of me ditching my bodyguards, he's trying to teach me a lesson, it won't last long." Or so you liked to tell yourself. Your head snapped back round to the soldier as you continued, "But he's not going to sit with us." It was as if he needed a reminder.

The soldier stared only at yourself. A stern nod before he wandered towards a distant table, still with a good view of yourself. However, it was good enough for you as you followed your friend towards the spot she had been keeping warm. "He seems...quiet." Your friend put politely.

You looked over your shoulder, already meeting his gaze as if it was glued to your figure. It faulted your smile as you gazed back to your friend, "He's one of my dad's projects." And projects was putting it nicely. You didn't know everything, but you knew enough. The man who was sworn to protect you, was a killer, blood red hands, and a list of victims to follow.

"Not one you can ditch then?" There was a hit of mischief in her eyes. It seemed to have become a tradition that any club nights had to have the thrill of running away. Now, it seemed less as a thrill and more of a danger.

"No, not really." You answered with a sigh to her disappointment.

And so as the conversation swiftly returned to the mundane gossip, you couldn't help but feel the need to look over your shoulder. You thought with the presence of a bodyguard that need would dissipate. Instead, you couldn't help but worry about what your new bodyguard was truly capable of. And how much you were going to see while he was assigned to your safety. 

[holyhomo]

hey holy pls tell me which of the girlfail cousins plays roblox and owns all the limiteds and has an emo avatar 😭😭🤞🏼

I know nothing about Roblox and didn't even realize the teens would be Roblox kids.

That said it's an easy to answer question.

'emo avatar'

Eira. No doubt. She'd also definitely be a tumblr girly to share her art and poetry. Definitely vented about Helga online as an angsty teen.

Hmmm makes me think of the others their social media.

Oline is a typical rich and spoiled Instagram and Pinterest girly. Too many selfies, clothing hauls, make up, aesthetic pics of food, outings with friends, the whole shebang.

Ulla probably would use Insta too for her skateboarding, graffiti, tattoos, piercings and food. Skater culture in general.

Signe would be forced to use twitter because she's only on social media for 18+ content. Probably also to follow sports though.

Sigrid might have a Instagram though a professional Facebook account seems more suiting. Nothing interesting about it, just a very 'normal' account. For a rich kid at least. Expect pretensions quotes from philosophers and other brilliant minds.

Helga would have LinkedIn.

Leslie would need to have twitter because she needs to promote her OF. Loads of nudes, previews and dirty talk.

Cherri the same as Ulla.

Lynn would have a Pinterest for her hobbies that she'd also use for classroom arts and crafts ideas.

Inger would be a anonymous troll on a social media and have very cookie cutter 'personal' accounts for appearances. Also definitely on Reddit to engage in her eccentric interests with likeminded people and support groups.

[sp0o0kylights]

Adopt a Jock Part One / Previous Part / Part 10.1 (you are here)

A03

Chapter 10 is complete and will be fully uploaded to A03 this weekend when I can get around holiday shenanigans. It's very long so tumblr gets it in parts. I'm sure I could make a Thanksgiving food pun there if I tried hard enough but alas I am not Steve nor Dustin.

Apparently, if you stumbled into supernatural shit, you were rewarded with a mountain of legal paperwork so absurdly thick that Gareth was almost positive it included a government-approved execution clause for anyone reckless enough to speak about things better left unsaid

So, here they were: barely a week past the lab incident, eating lunch, keeping their heads down, like their entire world hadn’t been turned upside down.

(He couldn’t even appreciate the pun.)

“She keeps looking over here.” Tiff’s pen tapped out a furious rhythm, her gaze fixed on one Nancy Wheeler, “And she’s been following us.”

“Well according to Steve she knows about--you know.” Gareth said, keeping things vague in hopes it would prevent any visits from men in black suits.

“I’m sure she just wants to talk.” Jeff said with a note of sympathy.

The fucking traitor.

“I’m sure we’re not allowed to talk.” Stewart muttered darkly, pushing his peas around his lunch tray with a fork.

“Only with people who don’t already know.” Grant tried to argue, and that rapidly dissolved into an argument regarding NDA’s and tricky legal language that Gareth tuned out in favor of his new found hobby--doing his level best not to think about anything beyond his lunch and what new D&D character he wanted to play.

His last one died in the prior game, and though Eddie had--weirdly and entirely out of character--offered to revive it, Gareth had waived him off.

They needed some normalcy right now, and if that came at the cost of Gareth’s beloved druid meeting her maker, then so be it.

Plus a new character was a great distraction.

(He was set on playing a noble elf known as ‘Gregg from Accounting’, but a second dwarf named Iron the Chef had been tempting…)

“She’s coming!” Tiffany hissed, slamming her pen down.

Mourning the loss of an easy, drama free lunch, Gareth sighed and prepared himself.

“Hi.” Nancy said, announcing her presence with quiet determination, books stacked in her arms and chin raised defiantly.

No one said a word back.

“Jonathan let me know what happened, and I wanted to say that I’m sorry you got pulled into all of this.” She paused, clearly thinking her words over, before adding; “Steve, Jonathan, and I used to practice.”

Nancy stopped again, this time blatantly waiting for one of them to say something.

She got more stares in return.

“Given that things sound a little open ended, and that there were injuries, I thought it might be good to start up again. Steve suggested if we do, you all should come too.” She finished, bulldozing right through her own awkwardness.

“Practice what?” Grant asked, confused and trying to cover it with suspicion.

“Defensive measures.” Nancy answered.

Seeing their unchanged blank stares, she gathered her books in one arm, formed a finger gun with her free hand, and mimed shooting in such a deadpan manner that Gareth almost burst into disbelieving laughter.

While he was haunted by visions of Nancy Wheeler holding a gun, Tiff loudly picked her pen back up, making enough noise that all eyes went to her.

“You beat my score on Mrs. Click’s practice test by two points.”

“Uh--yes?” Nancy said, blinking at her.

Tiff's eyes narrowed. “I’m kicking your ass on the final.”

Another dumbfounded blink.

“Okay?”

“Tiff’s coping, as are we--no…defensive measures necessary.” Jeff said, in a desperate bid to soothe things over, “We appreciate the offer.”

She nodded, seemingly placated by his response. “Actually, where is Steve? I wanted to talk to him too.” Nancy asked, changing topics with ease. “I haven’t seen him all day.”

“Ah-ha.” Tiff muttered under her breath, as if catching out what Nancy really wanted.

Stewart kicked her ankle.

“He’s with Eddie.” Grant said, covering the sound of their resulting scuffle.

“He’s been spending a lot of time with Eddie lately.” Nancy noted, in that same neutral tone the Feds spoke in. All fake nice without giving a single thing away.

It was a little terrifying.

“We all spend a lot of time with each other.” Tiffany shot back, hackles very much raised and not bothering to hide it. “We’re friends. That’s what friends do.”

“Man, we are vicious today!”

“She’s really sore about that grade.” Stewart covered, offering a sympathetic pat to Tiffany’s shoulder (who looked an awful lot like she was going to bite his hand for it).

Did Nancy Wheeler even know about the weird academic rivalry Tiff had with her? Gareth took one look at Tiff’s gritted teeth, and thought better of it.

“I wouldn't be if I was able to properly finish that essay,” Tiff motioned to the now hopelessly crumpled paper underneath her pen, “ instead of rushing it because I had to pull someone out of a lab--”

“Nancy’s right.” Jeff cut in, in another desperate attempt to distract them all from eating each other. “I haven't seen much of Steve or Eddie today.”

He turned expectantly to his right. “Gary?”

Gareth frowned back at him.

“Why would I know where they are?”

“Oh,” Stewart said, far too innocently. “You haven’t realized you’re their assigned zookeeper?”

Wadding up his napkin was second nature. So was launching it at his friend's head, who expertly (and unfortunately) dodged.

“So you’re saying you don’t know?” Grant asked, a smile creeping across his face.

Gareth opened his jacket, fishing around for a moment as if he was searching for something, before pulling his hand back to show off his extended middle finger.

Pity he actually had the answer.

“They’re in the drama room. Steve sweettalked Mr. Barns into letting them set up early for Hellfire’s game.” He grumbled, ruining the entire effect.

“See?” Stewart said smugly.

With deliberate slowness, Gareth raised up his other middle finger before waving them both in a circle.

“Fuck you, fuck you--”

“Not in your lifetime.” Tiffany answered, to multiple chortles.

“Don’t bother them, Wheeler.” Gareth continued, ignoring the assholes he called friends to turn back to Nancy. “They’re setting up for the Hellfire’s last game of the year and Ed’s is a little…obsessive about it.”

As in he was known to be a complete and utter terror in the days leading up to his grand finales but Gareth wasn’t telling her that.

These games were a big deal for Hellfire as a whole. Precious things they looked forward to and the finale game was something they often worked several months, if not a solid year, to reach.

This year's game had more riding on it than any one prior. Hellfire’s shared sanity, for example, and a shining piece of normality they all found themselves desperately needing.

(Plus the problem of Eddie flunking again--and not telling anyone.

See--Eddie had been touchy the first time he hadn’t graduated and even with the appearance of monsters and government lackeys, Gareth expected this year to be even worse--but the Steve of it all added a rather explosive emotional element.

“You still have most of Hellfire.” Gareth had pointed out, when he’d hitched a ride home a few days prior and found the paper declaring Eddie’s super senior year a lost cause. “You know you’ll still have them after they graduate too, right?”

“Because they’re going to be looking forward to their old pal Eddie while in college, sure.” Had been the clipped response.

“They will.” Gareth said, with a level of assurance he hoped Eddie could feel. “And if that’s the concern, then you’ll definitely still have Steve.”

Who hadn’t gotten into college, and openly admitted to refusing to try now that monsters were back.

“I guess.” Eddie had said, looking like a deflated party balloon.

In typical Munson fashion, he seemed to realize he was giving away more “real feelings” than he’d intended too, and changed the subject with an energy that Gareth knew was fake.

He hadn’t called him out on it though, and equally, he had not called out the mania Eddie had slowly been succumbing to since that fateful day. He’d get over it--Gareth knew he’d get over it--if they could just make it past the point where Eddie’s own brain informed him the world was ending to prove it.)

All of them deserved a break, and a place to put aside all the stupid shit and simply have a good time, and heading off Steve’s nosey ex-girlfriend before she could cause problems would go a long way to help.

“I’m sure they can spare two minutes.” Nancy was saying, mid creation of the exact problem Gareth was hoping to avoid.

“No--uh,” He flailed about for a reason she couldn’t, and the longer she frowned at him the more his brain simply vanished all forms of higher thought. “Don’t?”

Nancy’s expression soured, mouth twisting in a line Gareth very much did not like. “I’m sure they--”

“Tell us what other things you practice. Besides, you know. The pews.” He interrupted frantically.

Under the table his foot struck out, and though he had no idea who he’d struck he hoped whoever it was understood what exactly he was trying to do.

“The pews?” Nancy echoed, after a painfully long moment.

“You know? Pews!” Gareth mimed a gun, and then made “pew” noises while firing it.

Besides him, Jeff gave a very Harrington-like sigh.

(He’d been doing that a lot lately, Gareth made a mental note to mock him for it.)

“You cannot tell me you guys only practice with guns.” Tiffany huffed. She had not been the kicked party, but thankfully, hadn’t needed the nudge to catch on. “What happens if you run out of bullets?”

Nancy gave her an odd, almost calculating look.

“We use whatever else we have on hand.” She said flatly.

Which just boded so fucking well for the rest of this conversation (and Gareth’s life, given he was uncomfortably aware of the things that went bump in the night.)

“Well, give us an example.” Tiff continued, and given the now increasingly concerned looks that the rest of Hellfire was darting between her and Nancy, Gareth knew the rest of his idiots hadn’t caught on.

On a piece of paper he scrawled--and the underlined twice, for good measure;

‘Go. Find. Byers!’

--and then chucked it at Grant’s head. Who thankfully opened it, even if he made a face while doing so, before proceeding to pass the note around as Tiff and Nancy traded increasingly pointed words about weapons training.

“When you’re in a situation, you use whatever you have on hand. I would assume you knew this, given what I heard happened the other day.”

“Yes, but wouldn’t it make more sense to train and carry with backup weapons rather than just hoping you find something on the way? What if the--what if we’d been in the woods?”

Gareth watched the note travel from person to person, until it was dropped back in front of him.

‘You go find him.’ Someone had scrawled, followed by multitudes of doodles, two of which featured army-hat wearing dicks driving tanks.

Then and there, he decided that perhaps his friends truly did deserve death should a similar situation arise in the future.

Useless. They were all useless.

“You’re welcome to make a suggestion, Tiffany.”

“I will. I’ll make a list even.”

“Good.” Nancy smiled, with all her teeth.

“Fine.” Tiff returned, looking half feral.

Was this some type of weird mating ritual between academic types? God, they were scary.

‘Well, that definitely won’t come back to bite us in the ass.’ Gareth thought wryly as Nancy stormed off in the opposite direction of the drama room, tapping the note against the table. He glanced at the rest of the group, who appeared to be attempting to tempt Tiff out of her snit by way of asking her what dramatic bullshit she thought Eddie would be pulling in the finale.

If nothing else, he decided, they’d prevented ruining Eddie’s day--and possibly, their entire night.

Nothing, save more fucking monsters or equally evil government lackeys could manage that.

(Pity that Gareth had forgotten the third most powerful force on the planet when it came to wrecking plans.

Middle schoolers.)

xXx

The day had dragged but they'd made it, and Eddie in turn, had made that wait worth their while.

The lights in the drama room were low.

The entire table had been set up with such care and drama that Gareth almost couldn’t believe what he was seeing. Goblets lined both sides, each filled with a dark red liquid Gareth knew damn well could not be wine.

Candles--real ones, had been lit, casting shadows across Eddie’s face as he lounged in his throne, a master in their element.

A castle, meticulously crafted out of wooden sticks and painted a dark, forbidding gray towered in front of Eddie down at the end, with the layout of the insides crawling down the table atop carefully gridded paper.

Monstrous figurines stood in a row off to the side, like little soldiers, planted right in front of a plain, if not comically large, cardboard box.

It was elaborate, meticulous, and half the items had clearly been stolen from Steve’s house, if not outright decorated by the man’s own hand.

“Welcome, my friends.” Eddie purred, breaking the spell that had fallen over Hellfire.

“Oh my God.” Grant breathed, jostling Gareth’s shoulder as he pushed inside.

“Dude, you outdid yourself!” Stewart added, voice awed as he took it all in.

“He had help.” Steve confirmed, materializing at Eddie’s shoulder. He leaned forward, adjusting something in front of Eddie, ignoring the immediate angry swat and hissed warnings about “ruining the moment, Steven!”

“Glad to see you putting your mom’s party planning skills to good use.” Jeff teased, but no one missed the way he ran a hand down the table, staring giddily at the spread.

Steve gave him a shrug, but even in the dim light Gareth could see how pleased he looked.

It was magical, and Gareth felt something come alive in his chest that he’d privately thought the manticore had killed.

A childish sort of excitement, bubbling up as he realized he was about to have a damn fine time.

This, of course, is when the actual children came in.

“I made a timeline.” Dustin announced, shouldering his way in between Jeff and Grant to slam down a massive piece of paper.

“Oh my God where did you come from!?” Stewart yelped, started as more and more children suddenly swarmed Hellfire’s table.

“The middle school is literally next door. We walked.” Max rolled her eyes as she took a seat next to Tiffany. “What idiot let you guys light candles in here?”

El fell in right next to her, stealing what was clearly intended to be Grant’s chair.

Who looked like he’s about to say something about it until he caught sight of her delighted face.

Gareth would have laughed at the obvious way Grant’s shoulders slumped as he accepted his fate, if his own chair hadn’t just been usurped by Michael Wheeler.

“A timeline?” Steve asked, before Eddie could surge to his feet and kick the brats out.

(They all watched him jerk anyway, like he’d intended to do just that and barely caught himself.)

“Uh, everything?” Dustin scoffed, waving a beat up folder in the air. “We took it all the way back to when we first met El.”

Next to him, Lucas had stepped up to the table, running a hand down it in much the same way Jeff had. “We decided it might help us figure out where the manticore came from.” He said absently.

A riot of emotion exploded over Steve’s face, made all the funnier by the fact that it was entirely at odds with the setup he’d so lovingly created.

“I’m sorry, did we not hear the Chief of Police? He’s investigating this, our involvement is over.” Steve made a slashing motion with his hand, as if that would hold them all off.

(Gareth, who once watched all of these children fight each other over an arcade score for three consecutive days, knew it was a lost cause.)

Dustin made yet another scoffing sound in return.

Given how often he seemed to make them, Gareth wondered if he had problems with a sore throat.

“I thought we all widely agreed Hop’s investigation skills are terrible.”

“Hello?” Stewart said irritably. “We were about to get started?”

Eddie swung himself into a sitting position and made like he was going to stand up, likely to pounce on the opening Stewart had just given.

Pity Steve once again, beat him there.

“Yes, but he’s not investigating, is he? We,” Hellfire’s jock made another motion, this one a circular twirl of the hand. Gareth was starting to wonder if the gestures are directly linked to his stress level. “already did that part. He can now do the part he’s good at, which is fixing it.”

“He’s not good at fixing it, look at what happened with the demodogs!”

It was at this moment Gareth made his fatal mistake. In hindsight, he should have known better than to ask out loud,

“Okay, can someone please explain what the hell’s a demodog?”

Several protests, groans, and pencils are flung his way for it.

(“Do you know how often that word has been thrown around!?” He’d defend much, much later. “You guys keep saying it but not what they are!”

“If you stopped eavesdropping all the time maybe you wouldn’t be wondering about such things.” Eddie had responded snidely.

“It’s not my fault you keep talking about this shit when I’m right there you asshat--”)

“What, you didn’t think there were actually feral dogs in Hawkins did you?” One of the kids asks incredulously, like he can’t possibly believe anyone is so stupid as to buy into it.

“They were like the manticore, but small and more, well, doggish.” Dustin dismissed, this time with a Harrington flavored hand waive of his own. “Ask Steve, he was there.”

Gareth turned to do just that, D&D campaign be damned (He would not apologize for wanting to know what else might be out to kill them all even if the finale was technically on, sue him) to find Steve had slipped right into mother hen mode.

“No.” He spat, charging forward as he flapped his arms around, like the children are a flock of birds he can scare away. “You are not sucking anyone into this, and we are not getting involved! You heard Hop!”

Mike rolled his eyes. “Don’t be a coward, Steve.”

“I’m not a coward, I’m someone who doesn’t need another near death experience! There’s not a reward if you have five in a row, dickheads.”

Seething and not bothering to hide it, Eddie picked up the massive gold goblet in front of him and took an obnoxiously loud sip out of it.

“I’m also going to remind you that Henderson here,” Steve stopped behind Dustin to rattle his, “is going to camp in a few days? I believe the rest of you also have similar engagements.”

It was Mike’s turn to scoff.

“Lucas is only in summer school until 3 and camp doesn’t start for another two weeks. We have plenty of time!”

“It’s not summer school,” Lucas protested, eyes darting to Max and back as if she wasn’t aware the kid was a nerd. “It’s a creative writing program--”

“Yeah, well, the rest of us are busy.” Steve fired back. “So any theories you have, you can take and shove right up your ass.”

“Why is it always the ass with you Steve? Do you have an ass fixation?”

Gareth watched as Eddie immediately choked on the dyed Mountain Dew he had been chugging down, hacking so hard tears welled in his eyes.

Jeff shared a pained look with Gareth over the table as Grant pounded him on the back.

“I do not have an ass fixation, Henderson--”

“Okay.” Tiffany clapped her hands together, the sound ringing out throughout the drama room.

“Here’s the deal. Summer break is two days away. Steve is right--most of us here are working, if not preparing to go to college. No one needs to go snooping around where we aren’t wanted, and we definitely do not need anymore injuries. Kapeesh?”

Henderson immediately turned on her. “So we’re just gonna trust the guys who fucking started all this!?”

“Given they also have better ways of handling it, yes. We are. Hopper told them about Stewarts goo, they sent some suits in to kill the manticore, and thanks to El’s heads up we caught things ahead of time for once. Can’t we just enjoy that?” Steve was beyond worked up now, repeatedly running his hands through his hair, only to fix it, pick at it, and then repeat the process again. “For fucks sake Dustin, Eddie just stopped limping!”

“I don’t think it’s over.” Mike muttered angrily, pushing a finger against Tiffany’s water bottle.

She grabbed it before it toppled over, glaring at him.

“El, do you feel anything?” Steve spoke like he was invoking a god and not an undersocialized twelve year old.

“No.” She admitted, after a long almost uncomfortable pause. “I do not.”

Steve pointed at her victoriously. “There you go!”

“But--”

“No more buts!” Steve shrieked, before seemingly to realize he’d done so. He coughed, and then said; “I thought you dorks would be storming in here trying to get Eddie to DM for you, not harassing us about the Upside Down.”

“You guys are playing D&D?” Lucas asked, as if he hadn’t been salivating over the spread for the last five minutes.

“I really like your cleric.” Will said quietly to Jeff, having leaned over to look at his character sheet at some point during the argument.

“Will, aren’t you a Dungeon Boss?” Steve asked, to the horror of those around him. “Why don’t you go sit by Eddie, I’m sure you’d enjoy seeing how he does stuff.”

A wince rippled through the members of Hellfire.

There was simply no way Eddie Munson, a man known to be possessive at best, would ever allow any of them to even glance at his notebook, let alone his entire spread laid bare behind his screen.

Those were his secrets--the result of too many late nights and an easy contributor to his failing high school yet again--and this was the grand finale.

Steve sitting next to Eddie had been miraculous enough--and that was with Eddie actively demanding he sit there, in a vain attempt to drag Steve out of his issues.

Fearing the worst, Gareth snuck a glance at their glorious--and notoriously ridiculous--leader.

Eddie sucked on his teeth, the noise painfully loud in the abrupt silence, eyes on Byers the Younger before they drifted back to Steve.

Who clearly had no idea he’d put his foot in it.

Tiff looked ready to break a pencil, eyes glaring a hole in Eddie’s head as if daring him to disappoint the group's golden retriever while Grant, Jeff and Stewart had all magically found something else to look at.

Gareth himself hunkered down, waiting to see how this would play out.

One more painful, pulsing second and then Eddie seemed to come to a decision, rolling out his hand and gesturing Will closer.

“Indeed Baby Byers,” He dropped into one of his many DM voices, something deep but alluring. “come closer and learn from the master of masters. Perhaps you’ll find something here to take back to your own campaigns. Something truly…terrible.”

He waggled his eyebrows at Dustin as Will’s Party groaned, though none of them put up much of a fuss once they saw the sheer smile that overtook Will’s face.

With the unique combination of embarrassment and pride, Will took his place next to Eddie.

Steve beamed in the corner, clearly pleased with himself and it was not lost on Gareth (or anyone else in the know) that Eddie preened only after sneaking an obvious look at Steve’s face.

“God he has it bad.” Stewart muttered, only to hiss when Jeff not so subtly jabbed him with a pen.

Gareth just shook his head, and gave Eddie a grin that said he would absolutely be getting shit for this later.

“Stevie, be a dear and fetch more chairs would you?” Eddie drawled, as he settled back into his throne, baby Byers happily checking out the items he had laid out behind his DM screen.

Which Gareth supposed was Steve’s punishment for inviting the kids along, but then, Eddie may as well have been bossing the jock around all day regardless given the look of the place.

(He’d certainly taken advantage of doing just that while his leg had been healing.)

That was their mess though, and Gareth happily put all thoughts of monsters, murder, men in black and every other awful M word aside to inside pull out his luckiest D20 die.

“Hellfire,” Eddie boomed as the all finally settled, “It's time to show the kiddies how it's done. Let’s roll!”

“And Dustin bitches at me for my puns.” Steve loudly complained as he came back into the room with chairs.

Eddie shushed him again.

[sc0tters]

Your Best Listener | Ethan Edwards

summary: Ethan learns about your biggest secret, but when you learn he knows. your reaction is better than expect, so what happens when you offer to lure him into it with you?

request: yes/no

warnings: sexual themes, blow job, p in v, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it!), consensual use of recording device, use of the word cum, soft choking (yes I very much so got carried away with this one)

word count: 2.7k

authors note: to the person who requested this, you are so creative! I hope that I’ve done it justice, I don’t know what you call someone who records sexual audios cause pornstar really didn’t feel like the right option. hoping this isn’t the last request you make though because I’m like in love with your mind.

It had been on Ethan's mind for days.

It plagued his thoughts to the point where it kept him up at night staring at the ceiling as the voices in his head made him feel shame. He knew that the second he heard your voice he should have clicked off of the page, letting it go into the history of his laptop never to be brought up again. But when you let out a moan it suddenly caused Ethan to be sent into a whole different ball park. So rather than leaving, he stayed. The boy made a burner account so that you'd never have to know about what he was doing, so that it could be his little secret that he knew about what you did.

How he knew that you made sexual audios and posted them online.

Ethan realised that you had been doing this since just before the two of you moved to Michigan where you in fact became friends. He honestly had to say that he was shocked. You were the quiet girl who he had to bug for two and a half months before you finally spoke to him. The girl who would sit in the back of the class, the girl who would avoid pres because she hated small talk? That was you, so when he saw that you had racked up over 10,000 followers and over 100 clips that you recorded over the duration of your account, Ethan had to say that it was a nice surprise.

It was over a month ago that he learnt about this account and it made him laugh that you had a schedule even for this. The Canadian thought it was overkill when he learnt that you had your days that you did face masks, days that you shaved, and now days that you uploaded too.

Thursday at 7pm was when the new video would come onto your account, the only problem about this particular Thursday was that you asked him to hang out.

Sure he loved hanging out with you, it was something that he always looked forward to but on Thursdays Ethan wanted nothing more than to be sat in his room, under his warm sheets as he listened to your newest post.

You loved the power of intimacy that the account had shown you, how both men and woman alike enjoyed listening to you. The array of posts that you made were everything from mini role plays to your personal favourite where you were the listeners bossy little girl. You were naturally a total sub when it came to being in bed with someone else, so having the space to be dominant was empowering to you.

So when Ethan came over he was totally unaware of the fact that you were wearing one of your favourite outfits to record in. A matching blue lace set that had a gem in the center between your breasts. The reason why you had recorded one today was because you were going on a girls trip for the long weekend that was coming up and it meant that you weren't going to had time to record.

You and Ethan had been sat scrolling through the various movies that you had yet to view on Netflix as the clock struck 7.

The Canadian had been so caught up in picking the perfect movie that he didn't realise the time and as a string of notifications came through his phone he muttered a simple "can you check those for me?" The request was simple and innocent. And you already knew his password so as you lifted his phone up your eyes went wide to see what was said.

yourbestgirl has posted !

When you went quiet for an uneasy amount of time Ethan looked over your shoulder "shit," he mumbled as he realised that he had been caught out.

It was safe to say that you were embarrassed that he had found this but you wondered if he knew it was you "I should have told you that I knew about it," now that's a real what the fuck moment.

You had the moment to deny it but there was a burning question in the forefront of your mind "you ever gotten off to my clips?" You asked as you placed you hand on his thigh as you slowly began to rub up his leg, it wasn't a question that was far fetched as he had to follow you in order to get those notifications.

Ethan let his head drop back as he was surprised that you weren't freaked out by this "yeah," he repeatedly nodded as he unintentionally let out a whimper.

The hockey player wasn't one to be submissive but he seemed to enjoy those clips of yours the most "you like thinking of me as you get yourself off?" You were so forward because you were honestly turned on by this.

And after watching Ethan in the teams preseason efforts -especially the one by the football field where he lost his shirt at one point- you had started thinking about him when you recorded "so so much," he groaned as you were palming him through his shorts.

As he watched you smirk batting your eyelashes at him Ethan thought that he was going to pass out "thought about recording those clips with you." The Canadian confessed causing you to stop.

Throughout all of those recording sessions not once did you ever think about finding a partner to work with you. It was almost like you would have a special guest on the channel "you want to record with me?" You pulled away being serious in your question.

You had never heard of two people recording audios, this was a whole new ground of uncharted territory "only if you'd be comfortable with that." Ethan didn't want to cross anymore lines than he already had.

It was like a lightbulb had gone off above your head "we could make it like a threesome," the idea just fell from your lips as your filter seemed to quickly disappear as you two spoke about this.

Now you had never had a threesome before but you did know that it was a pretty simple set up. You and Ethan would play the happy couple and the listener would fit the role of your friend that walked in on you two. It almost meant that you actually be able to just do anything you were meant to do to the listener to Ethan instead.

The hockey player was almost touched by the proposal "something tells me that you've been thinking about this too," he smirked as he brushed some of your hair out of your face letting his fingers brush along your jaw before he leaned in to place soft kisses against your jaw.

You reached down to grab your phone as you let out a moan "e," you quickly went to type a message to your roommate "how long do you think we're gonna need?" You asked as you motioned to the message, you had already typed an hour.

Ethan looked at you as he sent you a glare "could make you come in ten," he shook his head "like to see you try," you shot back with a smirk.

It was like one of you recordings came to life "just let me know if you get uncomfortable or want to stop at anytime." Your voice was serious as you grabbed your mini microphone that you used to record. The long cable was thankfully still connected to your laptop meaning that all you had to do was press record "we've been wanting to try this forever," Ethan started by actually answering your consent request.

You smiled as you could see how he was a total natural in this "you think they can handle it baby?" You asked as you took your shirt off so that you could clip the microphone to the strap of your bra.

It was a sight that made Ethan swear that his dick was about to explode "go show what your mouth can do," he smiled as he leaned forward to kiss you.

It was a soft moment that made your knees buckle "you wanna be a good little listener?" You giggled as you dropped to your knees and began to unbuckle his belt.

Ethan clicker his tongue "play nice baby," he warned as he watched you drag your fingers along his boner. It was a sensation that caused him to tense his thighs "you're so desperate that I can't even tease you." You pouted looking up at the Canadian before you leaned down spitting on his cock as you began to use your hand to get him off "be a good girl and give him your mouth then." He repeated the phrase as he was desperate to feel your mouth on him.

Nodding you placed a kiss on the tip of his cock before you put it in your mouth.

Your tongue swirled around as you managed get to the base of his cock. Using your nostrils to breathe as your eyes began to water "being such a good girl for them," Ethan cooed as he ran his fingers through your hair as he helped you begin to let him fuck your face.

He let out a groan as he wiped one of the tears away from your cheek "it's all for my good little listener," you pulled away and as you spoke you made sure that your hand was making sure that Ethan wasn't lacking any type of attention before you used your mouth again.

It should have been embarrassing how fast he was reaching his high but you were beyond talented. You knew how to press your tongue flat against the bottom of his cock, how you would lightly massage his balls giving them the occasional squeeze, how you would take so much of his cock in your mouth to the point where you were gagging around it. You knew how to bring a boy to his knees in a matter of minutes.

That's why you felt so proud of yourself, your ego continued to be stroked by the boy as you caused him to reach his high "shit fuck fuck." Ethan repeated the string of words as he felt his body shake when his hands clenched around your hair forcing you to swallow everything that he had shot into your mouth.

You used your thumb to collect the drop of cum that was still on the head of his penis before you sucked on your thumb when you got up "I'm sorry," the hockey player apologised as he watched you smile.

Letting out a soft sigh you shook your head "that was so hot," you murmured as you kissed him.

Ethan let out a groan as he could taste himself on your lips causing you to make the mental note of editing the audio before you released this.

You softly pushed him onto your bed as you let out another giggle "you got a condom?" You asked as you saw that your box was empty.

That felt like the world was playing tricks on the boy "nope," Ethan groaned as he wanted to pull his hair out of his head.

Thankfully for you, you had seen your spare plan B pills that were still in your drawer "I'm on the pill and I've got these," you pointed out as you were happy with the resolution.

Ethan was now thinking that the day simply couldn't get any better "you sure?" He asked as he didn't want to make you feel uncomfortable.

You nodded as the idea of him fucking you raw was making your wetness pool in your panties "want you to fuck me so good," you mumbled as he kissed your stomach as he pulled your thong down.

Ethan moved you onto the bed as he sent you a final look asking if you were sure about what he was doing. You nodded dropping a gasp as he trailed his cock over your clit making sure to tease you "don't tease me please," a beg came from your lips as he slipped into you.

It took you a moment to readjust to his sheer size before you squeezed his arm motioning to him to start moving again "right there," you groaned when Ethan placed his thumb on your clit in an attempt to make you come quicker.

Yes Ethan was a man with an ego but he also knew when he was a man on the losing end of a battle. And fucking you raw whilst he was still sensitive from his first orgasm meant that he wasn't going to last very long "liking how warm my girls pussy feels." He grunted as he dug his fingers of his other into your side.

You let out a moan as you propped yourself onto your elbows "so good," you murmur before you kissed him.

The had that was on your waist moved to your throat as he pushed your back flat onto your bed as he put the slightest amount of pressure around your throat.

The boy was careful to not suffocate you as he didn't want to restrict your oxygen but rather slow the blood flow from your body to your brain sending you into that hazy mood "wanna be filled to the brim," you confessed as you wrapped you hand around his arm making sure that he didn't move his hand from your upper body.

You were truly on cloud nine as you were feeling so many new sensations due to the lack of a condom "got such a pretty mouth," Ethan's thumb quickened it's movements on your clit drawing another whimper from you. 

Locked your legs around his waist you couldn't help but let him be in total control "look at her so ready to come," he cooed as you squeezed around him making him groan "doesn't like letting you survive when she's close," he pointed out as the feeling of your pussy was similar to your mouth, warm and slick.

The access that you had given him was paying off as he got the chance to feel every crevice of your core "hitting you so deep," the hand that was on your clit moved to your stomach as he placed his palm down with pressure.

It caused you to nearly scream "gonna come," you announced as your own two fingers managed to find their way to your sensitive nub.

Ethan nodded "right behind you," you had been squeezing him so tight to the point where he could see stars.

You let out this cry "fill me to the brim." You barely got the words out before your orgasm hit you like a truck.

There was a gush that Ethan felt from your core before it loosened around him and that caused him to shoot his cum deep inside of you "Jesus gem," his hand fell forward onto the other side of you as he stopped himself from collapsing when he pressed stop on the recording.

You were absolutely fucked out as you struggled to keep your eyes open "I'm gonna get you a towel okay baby?" Ethan's words ended with a kiss to your temple that cause you to nod "did so good for me," he called out whilst in your bathroom.

He came back to see what could only be described as heaven. It was the site of your bare pussy as both of your releases slowly oozed out of you.

The warm wash cloth felt like an angels kiss as you let him do it "I should get going before she gets back." The hockey player mumbled as he handed you his hoodie sensing that you were cold.

That was what you didn't want to hear him say "new business partners spend the night," you shook your head as you leaned in to peck his lips.

This side of you was something that he could get used to "and when exactly did you establish this?" He asked as he slipped his boxers back on.

You sent him a playful grin "as of like thirty seconds ago."

[wavypotatochips]

The labor/delivery of Kylian’s first child, and how he reacts to seeing them for the first time, and then maybe when his family comes to meet the baby his parents are shocked at how much the baby boy looks like his father

𝘽𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙡𝙚 𝙊𝙛 𝙅𝙤𝙮 | 𝙆𝙮𝙡𝙞𝙖𝙣 𝙈𝙗𝙖𝙥𝙥𝙚

𝘗𝘢𝘪𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨���: Kylian Mbappe x Female Reader

Word Count : 888

𝘈𝘶𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘳𝘴 𝘕𝘰𝘵𝘦: Look at this gif Mbappe is such a cutie patootie omg- ANYWAYSSS I hope you like how I represented your idea and thank you so much for requesting!! ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚!!

(っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ REQUESTS ARE OPEN, currently covered in college work so as of now uploads MAY mainly be on weekends. Thank you for your patience c’: ♥

As you lie in the hospital bed, contractions coursing through your body, you clutch Kylian's hand tightly. His eyes are fixed on yours, filled with love and concern. "You're doing great," he whispers, his voice soothing. "Just breathe through the pain. We're almost there." You nod, panting through another contraction. The room is filled with the beeps and whirs of machines, the voices of nurses and doctors. But Kylian is the only thing that matters to you at this moment. As the hours tick by, the pain intensifies. But you push through it, knowing that at the end of this journey is the precious gift that you and Kylian have been waiting for. And then, finally, after what seems like an eternity, the baby is born. You hear the sound of crying, and tears spring to your eyes. Kylian leans down to kiss your forehead, and you feel his tears mingling with your own. "It's a boy," the nurse says, holding up the tiny, squirming bundle of joy for you both to see. Kylian's face lights up with joy and wonder as he gazes down at his son. "He's perfect," he whispers, his voice choked with emotion. "Absolutely perfect." You can't take your eyes off the baby either. He's small and wrinkled, with a tuft of dark hair on his head. As the nurse places him in your arms, you feel a surge of love so intense that it takes your breath away.

Hours later after the delivery,  you are now lying in a hospital bed, exhausted but exhilarated, cradling your newborn son in your arms. Kylian stands beside you, his eyes fixed on the tiny bundle of joy that he helped bring into the world. He reaches out to touch the baby's soft cheek, his hand shaking slightly.

"I just can't believe it," he says, his voice choking with emotion. "He's perfect. Absolutely perfect."

You smile weakly, feeling tears prick at the corners of your eyes. "He is, isn't he?"

Kylian leans down and kisses your forehead. "You were amazing, you know that? I can't believe how strong you were."

You laugh weakly. "I don't feel very strong right now."

"That's because you just did something incredible," he says, his eyes shining with pride. "You brought our son into the world. And he's beautiful." Kylian reaches down to grab the baby, cradling him in his arms. 

As you lie there, basking in the glow of new motherhood, the door to the hospital room opens, and Kylians parents walk in. They look tired and a little disheveled, but their faces light up when they see their son standing beside you, holding a tiny baby.

"Kylian!" his mother exclaims, rushing forward to give him a hug. "Where is my grandbaby? Oh, he's precious!" Kylians father shakes his hand and rubs him on the back. "Congratulations, son. You're a father now. How does it feel?" "It feels amazing," Kylian says, beaming. "I can't believe he's finally here." She looks down at the child in his arms and coos over him, admiring his little fingers and toes. "He's so handsome, Kylian. And look at those dark brown eyes! Just like yours." Kylians father peers at the baby's face, "Actually, I think he looks more like you than anyone else. Same nose, same chin." Kylian grins, clearly pleased. "Do you really think so?" "Absolutely," his mother says, "He's definitely got his father's good looks." Kylian laughs, "I hope he gets his mother's sense of humor, though."

Everyone chuckles, and you smile weakly, feeling a sense of peace wash over you. You can't believe that you're a mother now, responsible for this tiny little life. But looking at Kylian, holding his son with a look of wonder on his face, you know that you'll be okay. You'll figure it out together, one day at a time.

Over the next few days, the hospital room fills with visitors: friends and family. Everyone wants to see the new baby, to hold him and marvel at his perfection. And through it all, Kylian is there by your side, his love and support unwavering.

"He's so tiny," Ethan, Kylians brother exclaims, peering down at the baby. "How do you even change his diaper?" Ethan was not able to visit when his parents did due to schooling. 

"It's not that hard," Kylian says, grinning. "You just have to be careful not to get peed on."

"Speak for yourself," you say, rolling your eyes. "I've been sprayed more times than I can count."

Everyone laughs, and for a moment, it feels like the world is a little bit brighter.

Soon you are allowed to be released from the hospital with your newborn son. As the days pass, you settle into a routine: feedings, diaper changes, naps. You spend hours just staring at your son, marveling at how perfect he is. And all the while, Kylian is there, holding your hand, kissing your forehead, reassuring you that everything is going to be okay.

"I love you," he whispers to you one night, as you lie in bed together, watching the baby sleep in his bassinet. "And I love our son. He's the best thing that's ever happened to us."

You smile, feeling tears prick at the corners of your eyes. "I love you too, Kylian. And I couldn't agree more."

[sygneth]

Echoes of Elysium | Disco Elysium AU ...something?

Warnings

General warnings for my blog's content applies. Check here.

This AU is (rather) not very alternative. I am just trying to develop further events and some background for the characters, but even though I'm making research and I try to stay canon-compliant, only to fill in the gaps, I cannot guarantee it will never happen. Especially in this fandom, where many interpretations and paths are equally canon, we may not agree on some things, I hope you'll enjoy my point of view nevertheless. Some episodical OCs will appear too.

INDEX

EOE on ComicFury!

EOE on Tumblr:

Chapter 1: New Beggings -> START

EOE on AO3:

Main plot (uhh still in the process of uploading!)

Ficlet series (additional content)

LORE:

Precinct 41 plans and explanation

Plot outline

After Martinaise things are slowly getting back to normal, but the general atmosphere in the city gets thickens every day, La Retour is hanging in the air. Despite this, Harry is trying to stay sober and make amends. It's hard to say if Kim's appearance on the 41st is making things easier or harder between Harry and his old friends.

The Return happens. In the after-revolutionary mess, everybody tries to move on, but things are changing in almost every aspect of life. And on top of this, a particularly hard case drops and somebody has to take care of it.

The start of the project is directly after Martinaise, so forgive me this vague description, but I would hate to spoil the plot haha.

Okay, from now on additional info, still important but not crushial.

I want to focus on the relationship between the people of Precinct 41 and their internal experiences. Impactful events and thicker action will happen too, but mostly in the later chapters of this.

There are also some important premises of this AU I would like to highlight:

Kim was raised in an orphanage, presumably held by some Dolorian organisation (order?). Some of his old-fashioned manners and vocabulary are remainings after growing up in a religious environment (even if he's not very religious himself).

Eyes died around 9 months before the events from the game. Since then, Kim has been willingly working alone. His superiors were not very fond of that but somehow he managed not to get partnered with anyone.

Harry has no known family members left. At least as far as he and his friends know.

Jean and Harry's partnership started four, maybe five years ago. According to the game, it was "two years minimum" but personally I think those losers were stuck with each other for much longer.

Jean's years-long, unexplained depression has roots in some sort of personality disorder. Also, he is codependent on Harry, probably co-addicted too. He had problem with speed himself, however it's not nearly as serious as Harry's. I see him as more of a weekend/party drug user, as for now.

I assume that since the communist revolution gay relationships were technically legal in Revachol. Technically, because there are still no rights for same-sex couples and the social recognition is poor and rather negative (I got inspired by my own country in that matter)

That's all I can think of now. I will probably just add new information in the description of he pages.

Okay, cool, one last thing. What do you mean by "...something?"? Is this a comic? A fanfiction series? What am I looking at?

The answer is: I don't yet know. I am planning this to be mostly a comic, but I cannot say there won't be some written as fanfics parts or some kind of in-between media. I don't really want to limit myself to one medium only, but at this point, I have no idea what this will evolve into. I honestly just want to have fun lol

[mgnifiqueyoo]

— "love at first spark."

requested by: anon pairing: zb1 matthew x fem!reader song recommendation: dear no one (tori kelly) lowercase is intended… — a/n: y'aaaaall, i really wanted to start writing a zb1 oneshot but i actually didn't know where to start but thanks to the person who requested this, here's my first ever seok matthew oneshot! i hope you guys enjoy reading this as much as i enjoyed writing it! ^^ (btw, i am also thinking of making a masterlist for all my uploaded projects very soon!)

[ total words: 1.9k ]

click here to support me on ko-fi! ☕ click on this g.form link to request!

───── ❝ ❞ ─────

“ricky, i’m fine. you don’t have to call me every hour. tell mom and dad that i’m doing just great, okay?”

it was the second week since you moved into your new dorm. flying across the country is not really what you expected at all this year. you already had your plans; just trying out an online entrance exam to a university abroad and then, not expecting anything from it. you could say that it was all “just for fun” until you received an e-mail.

and that letter basically told you that you had to move out. 

“look, i don’t trust you on your own and i’m just looking out for you,” your brother said back in defense, probably already making up an excuse for this call to even take place. “... i’m gonna miss you a lot, y/n.”

“me too.” you paused for a bit as you remembered how fun it was to be back home. with each day that passes, things are changing and you just couldn’t believe that this was the actual start of something new. out of the country and pursuing something so difficult– law. “... m’kay, i’ll text you later after i review. love you, ricky.”

“... love you, too.”

ending the call yourself, you chuckled at the way he sounded so hesitant to say those words back. ricky would refuse to admit it but there was always that soft side in him that comes out every time something completely life-changing takes place; the type of thing that doesn't really have a clear answer in the end.

to him, this was one of those things.

by the time you got back to your plans, you were already so eager to start cleaning out your desk to spend the rest of your hours with your nose stuck in a book– and, oh, suddenly, there was a knock on the door.

"huh?" you stood up straight after bending down the table, your palms still looking for that bright, vibrant blueish aqua highlighter you'd always use for notes. "... just a second!"

nonetheless, you made your way to the door even though you had no idea who else could've been behind it. and once you opened it, you were met with a guy who held a mysterious box; he had dirty blond hair and a nice set of teeth that seemed to have been covered once he saw you.

but why?

"sorry, who are you?" "here's your order… ma'am?"

he didn't even sound sure when he said that last word as you took the box in your own hands, your brows furrowed. god, you were just so confused. you didn't even buy anything!

"... there's no way you're jonathan whales, right?"

that's when things got clearer for you as the tensed muscles on your face slowly loosened up… but at what cost? this guy in front of you obviously just got ditched by some horrible customer. 

"well," your smile widens but it only made him feel a lot more unsettled, especially with those dead eyes of yours staring back at him, "i'm not a johnathan apparently."

the boy in front of you bit his bottom lip, frowning as he squinted his eyes in anxiousness and a whole lot of uncertainty. he scratches the back of his neck, confused yet curious eyes looking around your dorm room from the outside as he later lets out a defeated sigh.

"... have i been scammed?"

your shoulders slowly rose up as a grimace was plastered on your face, your head nodding hesitantly in response. the blond had every right to roll his eyes, letting out a deep breath as you quickly assumed that he didn't like the way you reacted.

but in your defense, you were just starting your weekend with a supposed two-hour long review session. you didn't expect an unpaid package and a scammed seller to come by your doorstep!

"hold on… let me check my account." he raised his pointer finger up for a bit, pulling out the phone from his hoodie's pocket. not once did he smile at the view of whatever it was on his screen. "... oh, no."

"not a good news, isn't it?" "yeah… i just got robbed."

you widen your eyes, baffled at this ridiculous situation happening right in front of you. ‘i can’t just leave him here, can’t i?’ you thought to yourself, also letting out the same deep breath he did. — well, all those things you wanted to do? they’re gonna be done tomorrow because you feel the need to help this guy.

looking down at the package you held, you noticed how neatly it was prepared and you knew that this guy wanted to impress his customer. “... what’s your name?”

“matthew... matthew seok.” he then stared at the bulletin board behind your desk, raising both of his eyebrows in what seemed like fascination. “and i think we go to the same university, miss l/n? i’m really sorry- i need to take this back.”

as he reached for the package, you frowned, pulling it away from him. for some unknown reason, you didn’t want to return to him. 

“no,” you argued shortly, causing him to tilt his head, making him even more confused than before, “i’ll pay for it.”

the blond lets out a chuckle that is obviously having a lot of feelings mixed. you couldn’t help but mentally curse yourself for refusing to return the parcel to him. “you don’t have to do that-”

“this is mine now. i’ll pay for it.” your arm covered the lid of the box in baby blue shades, your brows furrowing further as matthew seemed to not get the memo yet. was it because it’s his first time meeting someone as persistent as this? or was it because he just didn’t know what to do? anyway, you cared less enough to answer those questions.

and instead, paid attention to this weird, sudden desire of this random parcel that you didn’t even purchase. “listen, i know you want to help me but i don’t want you spending your money on this.” matthew’s growing concern didn’t fade away at all as his hands reached for the box once more, resulting in you flinching as you held it in your arms tightly. — this is the weirdest you’ve ever been.

‘why am i so obsessed with this?’ you asked yourself silently in a form of an uncertain gulp and a puzzled, blank stare at the seller, who still stood by your doorstep. “what’s inside of it?”

“... well, you don’t need to know-” “is it drugs?” “what? no!”

but no matter how many times the guy tried to stop you, your hands started tearing the tapes around the box’s lid and body. — this is the most chaotic you’ve ever been. “ma’am, calm down!” he grabbed your wrists to catch your attention and it did… in the most unusual way.

in fact, it was so unusual that your gripping hands let go of the box, letting the package fall on the floor, a loud thud and a few cracks were heard. looking down, you soon realized that it was a record player. 

'oh, what a shame,' you thought, deep into your regrets. it was like there was this rope pulling you towards it even though you didn't know what this "johnathan whales" guy bought.

and apparently, it was really pretty, sky blue record player.

“i… i told you i’d pay for it,” you blurted out, unsure of the consequences as matthew kept his head down, taking a few deep breaths. audible and full of shame. you were sure that you just made the situation worse. “i’m sorry.”

as his hands let go of your wrists, you swore that something stinging was left on your skin. no, it wasn’t an insect or the itchy feeling of your sweatshirt. it wasn’t even the wind that entered your room from the windows… it was something else.

and there were sparks of it.

in pink and are all over your arms, glowing before they faded away like nothing; like it was some smoke.

“did you just… see that?” matthew did not wait for a second to let it pass, staring right into your soul with no plans of looking somewhere else. “you saw that, right? am i just hallucinating or-”

“no, i saw it too.” you couldn’t look away from him, founding comfort in the fact that he also saw (and felt) the same thing. not to mention, it didn’t look like it was just a faint glimpse– it was like fireworks in the afternoon skies, especially the ones before the clock strikes five o’clock. 

the boy then took a step back, realizing that he still held your arms as the time-stopping ambiance slowly left the room; but it lingered as if hours had gone by. “... what do you think was it?” he rocked himself back and forth in an almost unnoticeable way, little by little. you could see the genuine curiosity in his eyes but you were left with no answer.

i mean, how does someone know the reason behind that? seeing magenta sparks? it’s already so delusional just by listening to those words. “i’m not sure about that… do you want to talk about it?” you had no idea that you opened a new path for him as he kept his head tilted, jaw slightly left hanging as he smiled with his pretty teeth. 

“are you kidding? of course! i mean, you’d never see anything like that everyday!” he joked, making you let out a chuckle that was still very much lost in the moment. 

finding yourself staring at him, you woke yourself up in the middle of it, standing by the side of the doorframe to let him walk in as he giggled, oddly settled after all that disaster earlier as you began to slowly see the bright side in it, too.

“can you give me a moment to fix this mess?" you asked, which made him nod almost immediately, later walking his way in. you expected him to sit on the solo couch to make himself at least feel at home but he only stood, looking around with his bright eyes. 

and again, it made you smile for no reason. “so, you study law, huh? that’s pretty hard, isn’t it?” his eyes were glued to the textbooks that were piled on your desk as you chuckled, shrugging right after. 

“well, it’s something that i really wanted to do,” you said back, slightly biting the tip of your tongue as you remembered the mess you’ve made off of his product. “matthew, i’m so sorry for what happened. i’ll pay for it, i promise-”

“hey, i just told you that you don’t have to! we’ll just… i don’t know? tell this to the police? maybe they could do something.” he interrupted you, still pushing his priorities over your suggestion. and even though you didn’t like that, he sure did have a point. none of this was your fault. if only the scammer was a genuine customer, this wouldn’t have taken place.

but something tells you that this was meant to happen. you’re just not sure why.

once you returned to the ruined box with the badly damaged record player, his glare followed every move you made. maybe even syncing with the rhythm of your breathing. “... would you let me help you with that?” he offered as you turned to look back at him, exerting extra effort, considering that you’re crouched to the ground with broken pieces in both of your hands. 

“that’d be great.” you laughed as he did so too before continuing to sit down next to you, willing to share the work with you at least. 

when silence was starting to take over, the blond paused for a while as he couldn’t help but stare at you and it intrigued him. was it the way you were so determined in helping him? was it because of how odd the situation was? he never had a clue. “i think it’s not just my money that was stolen.” 

you faced him in response, raising an eyebrow with eyes shining in interest. “what else was stolen, then?” you let out another laugh once more, noticing the way you felt drawn to him more and more. for a bit, he seemed like he didn’t want to say those next few words but of course, he wouldn’t let such a perfect chance pass.

“... i think you just stole my heart.”

[alexanderlightweight]

I feel slightly greedy prompting three weeks in a row, but I just read the new chapter of Elysium's Tears that you uploaded to a03 and it is utterly incredible. To put it lightly.

If this plot bunny inspires you at all, I would absolutely adore the chance to read a snippet in that universe of Ragnor and/or Cat seeing Malec together for the first time - just the sheer craziness of them seeing a nephilim, one of the Clave's most valued treasures, not to mention the whole Lightwood thing, happily collared and kneeling at their best friend's feet, casually informing Magnus of secrets the Clave would straight-up murder to keep while just ... nibbling mango from his fingers.

(That was a very long run-on sentence, apologies. Also, I was mostly just going for vibes not specific plot points in that promptlet. Also, again, three weeks in a row so feel free to ignore ❤️)

hey Laws, feel free to prompt every week and you know i love vibes! this was a lot of fun and definitely is going in the next chapter of elysium's tears though i'll probably need a magnus redecorating his loft scene at some point lol. this is cat's pov because it was more fun that way! i hope you enjoy it! thank you for prompting

lumine

-

It’s been nearly three weeks since Magnus all but dropped off the face of the world.  Normally, Cat wouldn’t be so concerned if it weren’t for the fact that he’s been asking for her help securing an absurdly long list of rare potion ingredients.

It’s with a case of beer and a box of snacks that she portals over to his place, only to be gently redirected by the interior wards.

The primary wards still allow her access, but she’s portaled into what Magnus was once planning to use as a greeting hall. She wonders just what spell, potion or sex experiments Magnus is conducting that require such an elaborate and delicate array.

It’s with growing amusement that she taps her foot and counts out just how long it’s taking Magnus to respond. The amusement turns to concern when she feels Magnus’ magic reach out with intent, demanding she prove her identity to him in a way he rarely feels the need to use.

It’s without a second thought that Cat reaches back, letting Magnus weigh her soul against his knowledge of her and his magic presses against her, almost in relief.

“Cat—” Magnus murmurs and his voice is hoarse and he looks tired and worn but smug.

Magnus looks victorious, in a way Cat has never seen before.

“You’re okay?” She asks, because that will always be the first and most important question. Anything else can alway wait.

“Oh Cat, I’ve never been better.”

—

The amount of layers and traps that she has to step through is intense and Cat resolves to make Magnus visit her until he’s finished with whatever he’s doing.

“Alexander is resting at the moment—” Magnus is murmuring though he’s quite forgotten to explain just who Alexander is. It could be anything from a weekend frolic to a new snake or a stray cat that Magnus has gotten attacked to.

“And Alexander is?” Cat asks leadingly but it goes nowhere because Magnus just barks a laugh, a sharp, dark noise of pure avarice.

“He’s mine Cat, in a way I didn’t think could ever be possible.”

Magnus opens the wards and finally lets her through the last step and Cat walks in and stares. Magnus’ entire loft looks different, a fortress on the outside and an oasis of luxury on the inside. There are chaises and sofas and thick rugs with plush cushions and throws. It looks decadent and soft in a way Cat doesn’t normally associate with Magnus.

On one of the thick rugs, shirtless and dappled in lurid bruises and golden sunlight, a young nephilm lays sleeping. He’s aesthetically pleasing and is defined in a way that says he is heavily trained and very capable.

Cat waits for a moment, trying to understand how three weeks could possibly have turned into something like this and then she sees the nephilim wake up. Unfairly long lashes flutter and Cat sees a glimpse of icy blue, and then she sees it.

Lines upon lines of hoarfrost blue, the silver of an angelic power Cat only barely managed to witness and she understands exactly why Magnus’ lair is warded so thoroughly.

“How did you get him here?” Cat finds herself asking because it’s one thing for Magnus to try and lure in a nephilim curse with Elysium’s Tears. Magnus would think nothing of seducing such a person, not if it would give him a glimpse of something to look forward to.  It’s the layout, the way Magnus is covetously watching his Alexander’s every breath.

Something else is going on beyond a glimpse of what could be.

Magnus walks over and kneels, reaching down to kiss Alexander’s sleeping for, biting his lip until the bluelight fade and he groggily nuzzles into Magnus’ chest.

“Lovely, I’d like someone to check you over. Hmm, sweetheart?”

Magnus’ voice is soothing and sincere and tinted with a jagged edge of possessiveness.

“Oh—” hazel eyes blink at her, awareness growing. “Cat, then? It’s early to meet her. This isn’t normally one of her days off.”

It sends a chill up Cat’s spine to hear such a remark, especially when the only reason she’s free is because she used magic to get the day off.

BEcause she wanted to check on Magnus.

“All the better, Alexander. A fresh start for you, another difference to what you saw.”

Cat finds nothing truly wrong with him, besides the fact that whatever horror resides in his body and eats away at the future is a ravenous beast.

“He needs to eat more.” Cat murmurs, low because Magnus’ Alexander only stayed awake long enough for Cat to finish her work and now he stretched out across Magnus’ lap. His long legs thrown over the sofa arm and his face burrowed into Magnus’ stomach.

“Alexander does have a habit to miss meals when he dreams.”

Magnus gives her a pointed look and Cat knows exactly what he means.Then he rubs his hands through curls and tugs on them until he’s being pouted up at.

“A snack, Alexander.” Magnus croons, like he’s taming and rewarding some fierce, snappish beast. “Try, for me.”

His boy is exhausted, from the dreams or whatever left the bruises across his body Cat doesn’t know. She does watch, surprised as Magnus summons a bowl of frozen mango. His boy whines at the cold, unable to bite into it and insstead he licks and suckles from Magnus’ fingers. It takes him and agonizing amount of time each piece and his lips and swollen from the cold and from the way he’s making obscene, slick noises, his tongue must be numb as well.

Magnus doesn’t seem to notice how amorous their actions are. All of his focus is on his Alexander, feeding him each piece in such a cruelly intimate manner. It takes forever, the sun stretching high and falling low and then Magnus’ boy falls back asleep, suckling the juice from Magnus’ fingers. Magnus chuckles, something dark and ravenous as he presses his fingers even deeper into his boy’s slack, trusting mouth.

“He’s so good for me—” Magnus is murmuring, almost as if besotted and enchanted and there’s something feral in his tone. “He brought me information that has me, for the first time, ahead of my father.”

The shock of it hits Cat like a glacier pool and she copartmentalizes quickly, locking it away as she tries to focus on Magnus.

“So you’re

“I have all of my magic back again.” Magnus bares his teeth in a snarled grin, “ those pieces I sacrificed to hold him in Edom, it’s all been returned to me. We struck a deal, rather than have my strength be tamed by chaining him.

“Incredibly.” Cat finds herself saying, “I’ll let Ragnor know. You’ll tell us, when you’re ready?”

Magnus nods and leads her back to the entry hall and then he pauses and as she’s about to step through her own portal he interrupts the silence.

“I didn’t find him, Cat.” Magnus lets out a sigh, wonder in the hoarse edge of his breath. “He came to me. Surrendered himself to me and let me stop him from leaving, let me keep him and bind him and he adores me for it. Would worship me in gratitude because he knows I will never let him go.”

Cat nods.

This is all they’ll need to speak of, for now.  She’ll check on Magnus on and off, check on his boy as well, but in the meantime she’ll let Magnus lay his webs and string his boy up and so tightly bound that he can’t even blink without Magnus knowing.

After all, it’s what makes Magnus happy.

[pjsk-story-summaries]

What's on your mind? Exciting Picnic! Event Story Summary

TL;DR: Ena still worries about Mizuki after their strange expression on the mystery tour. They've started avoiding her and dodging questions, making things harder. After hanging out with Airi and Shizuku, the two idols suggest inviting them to a mountain picnic as a group to try getting to the root of the issue.

Though Mizuki seems cheerful for the beginning of the day, they get that same expression on their face partway during lunch. Airi offers to take them on a short hiking game while Shizuku and Ena stay back. Though Airi gets close, she still can't get an answer out of them. Mizuki also realizes the true intention of this adventure.

On the way back to the bus, the four accidentally take the wrong path on a fork and get lost. While Ena tries looking for a signal, she accidentally slips off a ledge, dragging Airi down with her. The two are unable to get back up, so Mizuki runs off looking for help.

They end up finding Rui and Nene at a rest area. Nene had asked Rui for help building stamina, so he had taken her out here to run (along with some extra props he wanted to try out). With their help, along with an extra rope assembled by Shizuku, they manage to save the two.

Later that night, Rui and Mizuki call. He comments on how desperate Mizuki looked to save their friend. Mizuki hangs up, and also denies a group call from Airi, Ena, and Shizuku. Ena is determined, now more than ever, to help her friend.

Fan translation (chisaki) / Official English YouTube Upload

Chapter 1: Ena's still worried about Mizuki's strange expression after their mystery tour, but can't seem to get through to them. She gets a call from Airi, asking if she'd like to join her and Shizuku that weekend. After a bit of pushing, Ena agreed.

Airi and Ena meet at the crossing. Shizuku was almost late after her phone's map crashed, but excited to finally meet Ena. They went out shopping together and had a lot of fun. At the end of the day, Airi offhand mentions that there's something bothering Ena. Shizuku asks if she can help in any way.

Ena tells them about Mizuki's strange avoidant behavior recently. They theorize it might be something that Mizuki's scared to talk about with her because they're so close. Shizuku wonders if talking to someone else might make things easier: ie, them.

The next day, Mizuki considers eating lunch on the rooftop. Rui runs into them and asks how they're doing, but Mizuki runs off when Nene appears to talk to Rui.

Chapter 2: Enanan invites Amia to come on a picnic with her, Airi, and Shizuku. Amia's initially super excited, but remembers their hesitance to get close to others and backs out. Ena insists, so Mizuki reluctantly agrees to come.

Shizuku finishes up practice in SEKAI with Luka when Airi comes running in to tell her the good news. They're all very excited to go. Shizuku offers to show Luka around while they're up there.

The day of the trip arrives. They all decide to call each other by their first names. Airi and Shizuku are a bit curious why Ena's so worried about Mizuki, since they seem so outwardly cheerful.

Meanwhile, Nene waits for Rui at the train station. In order to increase her stamina for shows, she asked him for help training. Rui shows up late with a bag full of mysterious luggage.

Chapter 3: Once they reach the highlands, the group decides to set up a picnic. Airi cooked some personalized meals for everyone to enjoy. Mizuki and Ena ask about MORE MORE JUMP!, while Airi and Shizuku about their music and videos. Mizuki gets a bit somber when they doubt they're able to provide hope to others, but immediately perks back up when Shizuku asks if they're ok.

After the meal, Airi wants to join a nature identification hike with Mizuki. Shizuku stays back with Ena, hoping Airi might be able to get something out of Mizuki during it.

Rui and Nene arrive in the mountains. Rui makes her wear a chainmail jacket, knee pads, and helmet for their run, much to her annoyance.

Chapter 4: Mizuki surprises Airi by correctly guessing the first tree on their hike. Their conversation turns to worry about Ena and bugs, which Airi takes as a chance to ask more about how they met. The two talk about the ways Ena has helped them out in the past. They both admire her tendency to speak her mind. Airi presses a little further, accidentally making Mizuki realize the secret intention behind this trip.

Nene and Rui take a quick rest. She's exhausted and frustrated Rui's not tired at all. Rui digs through his bag to test out a power-suit-like prop, but realizes he forgot it back home, much to his disappointment (and Nene's relief).

Chapter 5: Shizuku tries to call Luka out to see the scenery, but her phone crashes before she can. Ena talks to her more about Mizuki. They're not giving up on them yet. While Ena's gone getting a drink, some hikers approach Shizuku and beg for a photo, despite her saying no. Ena runs back and tells them off. Shizuku feels bad and offers an autograph instead.

Mizuki and Airi arrive back soon after. Mizuki's sad the two didn't come with, but had a lot of fun. The group decides to take the long way back to the bus. They reach a fork in the road. The sign is a bit faded, so they go left, believing it to be the beginner path.

Rui and Nene decide to take a cooldown hike after their run. They reach the fork. Rui realizes the faded sign marks the left path as the advanced one, so the two decide to tell a park ranger about the possible danger.

Chapter 6: Airi, Shizuku, Ena, and Mizuki begin to wonder if they took the right path. They try turning back, but can't remember which way that would be. Ena tries checking the map, but there's no service. She tries wandering to find a signal, but ends up slipping off a ledge. Airi just barely catches her, but ends up getting dragged off the side, too.

Airi and Ena try their best to climb up the ledge, but it's too slippery. Mizuki decides to run and get help while Shizuku remains with them. It begins to rain, and Mizuki slips, ruining their outfit. Still, they keep going, determined to save them.

Chapter 7: Shizuku worries for her friends. Luka pops in to calm her down. She suggests trying to make a rope, so Shizuku tries using her former idol experience to tie a good knot.

Ena starts panicking. Airi reminds her of her determination in the face of art; if she can do that, she can keep fighting here. Soon after, Mizuki arrives back with two people they ran into along the way- Rui and Nene. Shizuku lends Rui the partial rope she'd made to supplement the rope already in his backpack. They all work together to pull the two back up to safety.

Ena thanks Mizuki for the help, and apologizes for making them ruin their outfit. Mizuki brushes it off, more happy that Ena's alright. Ena reaffirms their goal of helping Mizuki.

Chapter 8: Mizuki and Rui call on Nightcord that night. He comments on the desperate look on their face when they came to him for help and asks more about Ena. They refuse to admit that they're friends and hangs up. They see a message from Enanan asking if they'd join a group call with Shizuku and Airi, but they refuse that one, too.

Ena thanks Airi and Shizuku for their help. Even though they didn't find out what was bothering Mizuki, Ena's happy they genuinely smiled. She promises to keep trying to help them. The group decides to hang out together again sometime before logging off.

[goodolddumbbanana]

Clown weekly check in!!!

Hi! How's it going in your side of the world? Is everything doing alright, are you alright? Did something cool happen this past weekend? Is something cool going to happen this week that you're looking forward too?

Question of the week:

Since it's around New Years do you have any goals you wanna accomplish for the year? Any hopes or dreams you're hoping to complete?!

My dog recently has become so naughty, he keeps running off my leash to chase that little shit neighbour cat. That cat is a devil from hell and it has bullied my dog since when it showed up.

And yeah, new year goal!!! Very simple hehe!!

- I hope I can write 1 million fanfiction words about Tsams and upload them on ao3. I want tO make a fic about Sun get his ass kick and being miserable. Hehe

- I will exercise more this year, and I hope I can learn one type of martial art.

- Maybe getting a boyfriend, haha. Though I can only love them in a platonic term, the idea of having someone whom we can talk like besties all hours seems very interesting to me.

- Training my cats into a supercat!!! They need to know I am the alpha in this house, not the opposite!! I refuse to be the lowest class in my house!!

Mom

Cats

Dog

And me

This year things will change!!!!

[pandorasword]

Chaeri as the 8th and youngest member of BTS.

Chaeri's masterlist

❒ member: Jin

❒ genre: fluff fluff fluff

❒ words: 1.1k+

❒ summary: In which Jin takes Chaeri to Coldplay concert.

❒ notes: Happy Easter to whoever celebrates it! I hope you are resting and enjoying your free time this weekend. I enjoyed those days because I managed to buy tickets for a Coldplay concert that will be held in my city in a few months. Finally working so hard is paying off for me in some way :) That's why I wrote this little piece of Chaeri and Jin's life excited about the thought that I will soon be having such an experience. Be happy for me, I have been waiting for this moment for a long time!

❒ warnings: mentions of disbanding; Had to repost this 'cause something keeps f*cking up the ones I upload

Fix you

April, 2017

Disbanding.

She had been having nightmares since that word started to be part of their conversations more often than she wanted to hear it.

Their success had begun to skyrocket drastically in recent times, leading them to achievements and recognition they never imagined. Of course, fame and popularity came at a cost though.

The highest one to pay was definitely their mental health.

It was becoming more and more difficult to have a private life, to be able to go out without being escorted by at least a couple of bodyguards, to visit a place without it being mobbed by fans who wanted to meet them at all costs, to spend time with their family without exposing them to risk.

Was it worth it?

That was what members wondered, as the days, weeks, months passed. As the whole rottenness of the KPOP industry poured over them, choking them until they could no longer breathe, making them live with the constant fear of making a mistake on camera and being labeled forever for that one, banal slip-up.

They needed time off.

That's why, when Coldplay's tour stop in Seoul was announced for that April, Jin didn't pass up the opportunity to buy two tickets: One for him and one for the youngest of the group.

As lifelong fans of the British group, the boy thought that such a night would be good for both of them.

As Chaeri and Jin took their seats at the Coldplay concert, Chaeri couldn't help but feel a sense of excitement coursing through her veins. This was her first time experiencing a concert as a fan rather than a performer, and she was eager to soak up every moment of it "I can't believe we're really here. This is like a dream come true."

Jin smiled at her, "I know what you mean. I've been waiting for this moment for so long."

"Thank you, oppa. This is the most amazing gift you could have given me" To him, she was like a little sister, and he was determined to make sure she had a night to remember "Anything for my little brat"

The arena quickly grew pitch black, and the audience erupted in a roar of delight. Chaeri and Jin felt a thrilling chill run up their spines as a single spotlight shone down on Chris Martin, standing atop the sprawling stage. They were both awestruck by his presence; it wasn't just about seeing a superstar musician, but embodying the feeling of euphoria that this incredible artist brought to thousands upon thousands of people every night. The music was mesmerizing, transporting them both into another world as they sang along with their fellow fans. Every song gave way to new waves of emotion, culminating in an unforgettable experience.

The thunderous beat of 'A Sky Full of Stars' filled the atmosphere, vibrating through every fiber of Chaeri and Jin's beings. The colorful LED bracelets that adorned their wrists illuminated the entire arena like a blanket of stars. With each pulse of the music, the bracelets bled into new colors, casting an ethereal glow on everything around them. Every time Chaeri lifted her arm or Jin waved his hand, the colors swirled in a dizzying kaleidoscope. It was as if they were commanding the stars themselves to dance for them. The whole experience felt like being in another world - one where light and sound were the only forms of communication. 

Chaeri gazed up in awe at the sea of lights above them, feeling like they were a part of something bigger than themselves. She reached out to touch one of the glowing stars above her head, but instead felt Jin's hand grasp hers, pulling her closer to him. The moment was electric, pulsing with life and energy. They swayed together along with the beat, lost in each other and lost in the magic of it all.

"I love you Chris Martin" She cupped her hands around her mouth to scream as loudly as she could "I love you Coldplay" at the second enthusiastic shout Jin joined in. Their voices were lost in the thousands of others who were there that night, yet they felt they were louder than they had ever been on stage.

As the chords of "Fix You" echoed through the stadium, its lyrical beauty pierced their hearts. It felt like this song was written specifically for them; every word gently cradled their souls and gave them solace in a time of hardship. Every single note seemed to understand their struggles, melancholy, and pain. It was as if the music had been woven from their own words:

"When you try your best but you don't succeed. 

When you get what you want but not what you need.

When you feel so tired but you can't sleep. Stuck in reverse. And the tears come streaming down your face. 

When you lose something you can't replace. 

When you love someone but it goes to waste. 

Could it be worse?"

When the song reached its climax, and Martin sang 

"Lights will guide you home, and ignite your bones. 

And I will try to fix you," 

Chaeri felt tears almost streaming down her face.

Jin tenderly grasped her soft hand, and pulled her in close with the crook of his arm. Together they swayed to the melody of the song. He looked into her teary eyes and whispered reassuringly, "We'll fix each other." 

"I don't want it to end, you all are my home"

Jin smiled gently at her, "You'll always have a home with us, Chaeri. No matter what happens, we'll always be a family" And with that, he pulled her into a warm embrace, holding her tight as the song played on.

Chaeri felt a sense of comfort and safety in Jin's embrace, and she held onto him just as tightly. She knew that no matter what happened in the future, they would always have this moment to look back on, this moment of pure joy and happiness.

As the concert wound down, and Coldplay took their final bows, Chaeri and Jin made their way out of the arena, arm in arm. The night sky was filled with stars, just like the bracelets that had illuminated their wrists earlier. For a moment, they both stood there, gazing up at the twinkling lights, lost in their own thoughts.

"I want to make more memories like this," Chaeri finally said, breaking the silence. "Memories that we can hold onto when things get tough. That's why I think tonight should not end here."

Jin looked at her, puzzled. "What do you mean?" he asked.

Chaeri smiled mischievously and leaned in close to whisper her idea into his ear. Jin's eyes widened as he heard what she had on mind, and a playful smirk spread across his face. He tightened his grip around her waist and whispered back, "Let's do it."

taglist: @alixnsuperstxr

[melodygatesauthor]

Weekly Update - 05/18/2023

Hey all! I think I'm going to start doing weekly updates since I have a lot going on and a lot of fics in the works! I want you to know what I'm currently working on (WIPs) and I'll also toss some life updates in here as well. I'm also going to mention requests I have in the pipeline and when I'm expecting to complete them. Maybe your request is in there! (It probably is)

Going forward the updates will be on Sunday, I'm just doing this now because I have ADHD and it's on my mind today lol.

Since I've been really following the winds of inspiration lately, I want to keep doing that so I'm just putting this here so you know where the winds are blowing lmao.

I'll also mention if I think my current longfic is going to be delayed or anything here as well.

Gonna cut it up into sections to keep it consistent and easy:

Long/Chaptered Fic Updates

Currently I'm working on A Bit Dodgy, as many of you know. There will NOT be an update this Monday (05/22/2023). Though I will be working on it this week for @welcometostayingawake to edit and I'll have it to post by 05/29/2023 (that's the goal). If it's going to be pushed back again, I'll let you all know the Sunday before (05/28/2023).

Mini-series Update

Worth the Risk Part 3 should be out this week. That's the goal anyway. I have a good chunk of it done but there's still a lot to do. <- Still hoping to have this out this week but we will see (05/22/2023)

Uploading The Fractured Moon Part 2 (either tonight or tomorrow yay) Continuing to chip away at The Fractured Moon Part 3

There's a top secret fic series coming out HOPEFULLY this weekend, but it may be next weekend instead depending on how quickly I can get it finished. I'm losing my mind over it. (It's a 3 parter and all 3 parts are coming out at the same time teehee) <- Editing that today 05/22/2023. Hope to be done with it by tonight!

In June there's a writing challenge for Pride that @flightlessangelwings is putting on and I'm working on my fic for that so I'll be announcing more for that fic once I have the details better outlined!

Fool Me Twice should be getting a part 2 soon. I'm hoping I'll feel inspired to at least start it this week but maybe not. <- Taking this off the list for this week. Focusing on ABD and requests (05/22/2023).

Still considering doing 2 other parts for The OJ Problem but honestly, it's not that exciting to me rn. Since it's more of a Valentine's Day fic I might consider just doing those next year. <- Taking this off the list for this week. Focusing on ABD and requests (05/22/2023) will probably just put this on for next year for valentine's day.

Requests

I still have a sizeable amount of requests. REQUESTS ARE STILL CLOSED CURRENTLY. If your request is in blue, that means I'm going to try to work on it this week (05/21-05/27). If it's in pink, I'm going to try to work on it a different week. It's taking me a while to get into the headspace for some of them so thank you for your patience. Green means it's done I'm just working on editing now. They are posted in no real order, just working on them as I feel inspired to.

Blue Jones X f!Reader requested by @saraicus

There are 2 prompts in particular that I liked from the list you sent so I'll be doing them. - His eyeliner running down as he’s banging you against his desk - You’re a new patient and he just grows overprotective towards you. Doesn’t want you to meet other men and keeps you in solitary confinement for his jealousy sake.

Moon Boys X f!Reader by @ravenz-hope

Gamer reader and the boys getting angsty over her being too obsessed with the game (most relatable thing ever) <- Haven't had the time to set up the post but this will be coming out very soon. Need to finish editing as well (05/22/2023)

Moon Boys X f!Reader by @simpforbritgents

Asking for something like Feeling Flustered where the moon boys are doing guided phone sex.

Moon Boys X f!Reader by @mercuryrosesixx

Moon Boys w/ a f!Reader w/ nipple piercings. <- Started working on headcanons (05/22/2023).

Marc Spector X f!Reader by @blueflowerhat

Marc shower sex based on AI prompt.

Steven Grant X f!Reader by Anon -

Steven and Reader are both virgins. Marc is guiding/coaching Steven.

Doctor Marc Spector X Patient Reader by @burnincrown

Role Reversal (sort of) of Not a Doctor - Marc is the doc, reader is the patient and he takes advantage - Dark Fic

Nathan Bateman X f!Reader by @campingwiththecharmings

This is the prompt that hit me like a Nathan-shaped mac truck! -> “if you don’t like my teasing why are you moaning”

Nathan Bateman X f!Reader by Anon

Cam girl reader x Nathan - Nathan turns to a cam girl, he's been kinda stalking her. (Excited hehe)

That's it for right now. I'm a busy lady as usual but I like having a few different projects going at once! More coming soon! Thanks for always being so awesome and supportive. Love you all!

[sarahjswift]

Twin Wounds Chapter 3! :)

I'm so glad you all are enjoying the Twin Wounds series! I'm almost at the end of my reserved chapters, so uploading might be more spaced out :)

I LOVE reading everyone's comments and reblogs! I read everything, even if I don't comment on them.

Tag List: @backtobl4ck (tell me if you'd like to be in the tag list!)

Warnings: Self-Harm, Language

I made this chapter extra long, and I hope you like it! Enjoy! :)

__

When Aelin woke up, she didn’t know where she was. She jolted out of her sheets, heart racing, before her nostrils were stung with the unique scent of the room and her mind caught up. Right. Rehab. Exhaling through her nose, Aelin fell back on the pillows, despair filling her inside. At least at home, she could have her own space, even if she was…alone. 

She curled up on her side, her heart beating so fast it hurt. She was trembling uncontrollably, her teeth chattering. She cursed as she felt herself going into a panic attack. Chest growing tight, Aelin sprung out of bed and threw her pillows on the floor, searching for what she had - ah. There, the knife she had taken from Lucas. It was a butter knife, barely a blade, but it didn’t matter. She grabbed it, hand shaking, and sliced it across her arm. 

Her breathing came back, her trembling ceasing as her mind focused on the sharp pain of the knife and not the sharp pain of her life. 

Aelin wiped the tears off of her face and hid the knife, making the bed. She pulled on a long-sleeved shirt she had packed to hide the cut and threw open the door, then started as she saw Eillia standing right there, her hand up in the air as if she were about to knock. “Oh, I’m sorry dear,” the nurse said with a surprised smile. “You slept in so late, I was just about to wake you. It’s time for breakfast.”

Aelin nodded and followed Eillia down the hall toward the cafeteria. It wasn’t as crowded this time - apparently everyone had already eaten - but of course Aelin’s therapy group was almost all there. Lysandra, Elide and Tiela, all quietly eating bagels. Lysandra raised an eyebrow at Aelin’s lack of food as she sat down. “Not hungry?” she asked, her eyes narrowed. 

“Nope,” Aelin replied, popping the p. She glowered at Lysandra, daring her to say something. Luckily the woman didn't, instead turning to Tiela and making conversation. Elide smiled softly at her. Aelin suddenly remembered why the woman was here - bulimia. Her eyes darted down to Elide’s tray, and a surprising feeling of relief took her as she saw that Elide’s once full plate was now almost empty. 

___

Rowan pulled into the Center’s parking lot, nursing a decent hangover. He hadn’t been drunk enough to forget the night, though, and he thought of his night with Remelle. She was an attractive female, and the sex was nice enough, so he hoped to see her again. Maybe I should text her, Rowan thought as he walked toward the massive building. He paused in front of it, dreading the day that lay ahead of him, and took a gulp of his black coffee. Let’s go. Eight hours and then the weekend.

“Rowan,” Sellene called out to him from her spot at the receptionist’s desk. Although she was the manager, she insisted on acting part time as the office’s receptionist. “What is wrong with you? You look like shit.”

“Gee, thanks,” he said dully, tossing his coffee cup in the wastebasket next to the door. The waiting room was empty except for Jenord the janitor mopping the floors. “Any new patients you���d like to spring on me today?”

Sellene rolled her Whitethorn eyes and handed Rowan a stack of files. “These are the new patients’ information. Elide, Lysandra, Tiela, Selmer, and Aelin. You can study them before their next session, in,” she checked her watch, “two hours.” 

Rowan nodded, holding the files tight. “Thanks. Have a good day.” Sellene echoed the sentiment and he walked further into the building, toward his office. It was a decently spaced room at the back of the building, but it was barely decorated. Not for lack of effort on the staff’s part - Rowan liked his spaces minimal and clean. He had his desk, files, computer, a window and two shelves in his office and that was good enough for him. 

He sat down at his desk and opened the files. First he went through Selmer, who was a sweet man with severe OCD that had gotten to the point of self-harm. He made a note on his planner to schedule a one-on-one therapy session with him and to not let him near sharp objects he could use. Next he studied Lysandra. The woman had been arrested three times for selling drugs - when she was nineteen, twenty-one and twenty-four. She had been in and out of foster homes since she was taken from her parents at age four because of abuse and neglect. Apparently, her last foster mother, who she kept in touch with, had checked her in. Contact Lysandra’s foster mother, Rowan typed into Lysandra’s online file.

Next, Tiela. She had bipolar disorder, causing many problems in her life. Her parents had checked her in, but that was about it for the information Tiela’s minimal file gave. Elide was a different story, though - her mother had written her own, two page account of her daughter’s story. Her mother, Marion, had found her purging her dinner when she was 10, and had brought Elide to therapy. Years passed and Marion thought everything was better - but when Elide entered high school and got mixed up in “a toxic girl group”, the binging and purging had resumed. After a couple of years of desperation, Elide agreed to go into rehab. 

Reading Marion’s account of her daughter’s story, Rowan felt saddened for both of them. Marion clearly loved her daughter but didn’t understand Elide’s disorder. He would have to do some one-on-one therapy with Elide to get her side of the story. 

Finally, it was time for Aelin’s file. Rowan braced himself as he opened the file -and immediately let out a self-involuntary groan. Included in the file, as with all patients, was a photo of them - and this one was going to kill him. It was a photo of Aelin clearly before her traumas(she must have been in her early twenties) beaming into the camera at the beach, dressed in a red bikini. The sun was shining down on her, igniting her golden hair and sun-kissed skin - he was right, she wasn’t pale all the time - and she looked radiant. 

Move forward, man. You’re acting like a creep, Rowan chided himself, forcing his eyes down the paper. He was immediately sobered, however, at what he saw. A newspaper obituary was included in the file for a man named Sam Cortland. The small black-and-white photo showed a handsome man with golden skin, brown hair and a smile that made him seem younger than his years. The obituary read;

Sam Cortland, twenty-five, passed away from stomach cancer at 1:57 pm on May 15. He was beloved by many and a pillar in his community. He grew up in Rifthold, volunteering as he went through school, and finally chose the honorable career path of a cop. He served in his local police station for five years, right after high school, before being diagnosed with stomach cancer at the age of 23. It didn’t slow him down, however - he planned fundraisers for his station and sat at office duty. Although the cancer eventually led to Sam’s tragic demise, he is survived by his parents, Aran and Calarel Cortland, and his fiance at the time of his death, Aelin Galathynius. Mr. and Mrs. Cortland and Ms. Galathynius are grieving his death. Mrs. Cortland is starting a fund in Sam’s honor - the Cortland Fund for Young Cancer Patients. For more information, visit their website. Help keep Sam’s spirit alive by volunteering at his fund or donating to your local police station.

Rowan ran a hand through his hair, clenching his jaw. Not much mention of Aelin in the obituary, but he had read enough to know that Sam had been a good male. He highlighted the sentences that mentioned Aelin and continued through the file. A note was included from Aedion Ashryver. Rowan recognized the name - Aelin’s cousin, the one who had checked her in. Aedion’s handwriting was messy, as if he had written it with passion. 

To the Whitethorn Rehab Center,

You have to understand that checking my cousin into this place was a last resort. For the past year, she has been a ghost. She hasn’t left her bed, barely eaten…but the last straw was when I caught her cutting herself. I never knew she self-harmed…

“Shit,” Rowan breathed. He had no idea Aelin had a history of self harm. He made a note on her file and a mental reminder to tell the nurses to make sure she wasn’t taking anything she could use. 

..and it made me want to stab myself, for letting her suffer like this on her own. Aelin is an amazing person, truly my favorite being in this world, and I expect she will be treated as such. I hope this staff understands that she has been through so much, and if she snaps it’s not personal. She loved Sam with her whole heart, and she had built her life around him. He felt the same, of course. But when he passed away, a part of Aelin died with him. Please, please help her. I just want my cousin to be happy. Thank you, and contact me if you have any problems. -Aedion

Rowan copied the note onto Aelin’s online file and checked the time. He had their therapy session in two minutes. He placed the files into his cabinet and headed to therapy.

___

Everyone was in the room. Rowan tried and failed to keep his eyes from immediately darting to Aelin. She looked miserable, a dead look in her eyes as she hugged herself. Lysandra was staring at her with an odd expression on her face and Tiela, Selmer and Lucas were talking. Elide was alone, fiddling with a small purple stress ball. 

“Good morning everyone,” Rowan greeted his patients as he sat down. “TGIF, am I right?” He tried not to cringe at his sad attempt at cheer, but Lysandra didn’t give that same courtesy. 

“It would be nice if we could do anything in this place,” she muttered. 

Rowan frowned. “I think there is a Friday bowling night in the gym, isn't that right?” Silence greeted him, and Lysandra rolled her eyes. Elide gave him a small, encouraging if not pained smile. “Anyway,” he continued, “I’m excited to get to know you all. I wanted to talk about homes today. What does a home mean to you?”

“That is some corny shit,” Lysandra snorted. “Ain’t no way I’m doing that.” Tiela nodded in agreement. 

“Okay then, you won’t start,” Rowan said patiently. “Elide? What does a home mean to you?”

“U-um,” Elide stammered, flushing. Her grip on her stress ball turned tighter, her knuckles turning almost white. Rowan gave her an encouraging smile. “W-well…I guess..a home means to me t-that you can be anything and…you will still be l-loved? I guess? Like, n-nobody would j-judge you.” 

Rowan jotted down a note in his notebook. Elide: Home means you can be anything and won’t be judged? Connection to her “toxic girl group”? “Perfect, Elide, thank you.” Elide breathed out a sigh of relief and slumped back in her chair.

“I’ll go,” Selmer volunteered. “I think a home is a steady, reliable place that will always be there for you.” 

Tiela nodded. “Yeah, and even when you do bad things they won’t be angry or disappointed.”

“I hear a ‘they’ in there. Are you referring to people in a home?” Rowan asked her.

Tiela blew out a breath and flicked her ice-blue eyes up to the ceiling. “I think that a home can be people as well as a place or feeling. Like, some people are just - home.” 

Rowan gave her a huge smile, a happy feeling in his chest. A breakthrough. “Amazing, Tiela. What do we think about that?” After a moment of hesitation, he decided - “Aelin? Anything you’d like to add to Tiela’s thought?”

Aelin seemed to snap out of a haze, her eyes cloudy as she raised them to Rowan’s face. He watched as her hand twitched to her upper arm, as if to hide something there. “What?” she asked.

“I said people can be homes,” Tiela helped her, tucking a piece of her brown hair behind her ear. Rowan nodded, pencil at the ready for Aelin’s response. “Do you agree?”

“People…can be homes?” Aelin’s face twisted into unhappy amusement, her eyes drifting off. She gave a bitter laugh. “Yep. Yep. People can be fucking homes. Sure, believe what you want to.” 

“Do you disagree with this?” Rowan asked calmly. 

Aelin glared at him, and a chill went through him at the sight of her angry gaze pinned on him. “People can be homes, if you count a home as something that will go away at any second.” 

Tiela looked hurt and crossed her arms. Aelin closed her eyes and went away, back into oblivion.

[twotangledsisters]

I remember a post you made a while ago with Eugene for a sneak peek of something you and @the-writer1988 were writing, is there any more info about that. Or perhaps a sneak peek 😅?? Totally fine if not though.

Our Undying Dream! Yes! Here is the original post for anybody who didn't see it!

We've been slowly working on that, and are making good progress! It's definitely moving along slower than we would have hoped but that also makes sense as @the-writer1988 has Tangled: Between The Kisses as her main fic, and I have Tangled Sisters.

We don't want to start publishing until the fic is completely written to avoid any delays, so that would be the main reason it's taking so long!

Sneak peeks?? Sure! First, here's a poster I don't think I ever published:

(this was drawn way back in May so it's not the prettiest art I've uploaded recently, so apologies for that!)

And here's a sneak peak from Rapunzel's POV (any snippets may go through changes before publication, as always):

“Research is ongoing regarding the recent terrorist attack which took place early this year in Paris. Authorities say they are doing all which is in their power to ensure justice is served.” The bright glow of the television lit up the room. The voices of the news anchors echoed around the room, but they all seemed to fade together after a while. 

Rapunzel sat on an old sofa. The fabric was practically disintegrating after so much use. The blanket she had taken residence in was no longer soft, rather matted and rough, not that it ever truly had been soft for her. It was yet another hand-me-down from Gothel. 

Talking of the devil. 

Rapunzel flinched at the sound of plastic pots being moved around one of the kitchen cupboards. Calling that room a kitchen was generous. It was a cupboard containing plastic containers with food that requires no cooking. Plastic cups, plastic plates and the only cutlery were spoons.

Gothel had taken every precaution to ensure her precious flower didn’t have a way to harm her hair. 

“Do you know no restraint? You’re so low on food! How much have you been eating?” Gothel complained. 

Rapunzel didn’t respond. What would she say?

“You make me work very hard, my flower.” 

Rapunzel felt a chill run down her back at the pet name. Once upon a time it had been nothing but sweet, but now it was the cruelest reminder of how little Gothel viewed Rapunzel as a person. 

“A small plane crashed this weekend after an engine malfunction, crashing into a cluster of mysterious black rocks. There were no survivors.” The news continued to fill the silence with its never ending list of depressing facts of an unsafe world, as Gothel called it. 

Rapunzel’s grip on the blanket tightened. The room was so very dark, with no natural light, just the flashing of the television. 

The volume was too high, but if she attempted to lower it, Gothel would complain of how she could not hear it from the kitchen. 

Gothel’s attempts to sound somewhat casual while keeping her prisoner were angering. Yet the anger would not do any good for Rapunzel. She knew it wouldn’t. She’d tried. She’d shouted at Gothel many times over, screamed and even banged her fists against the walls. Nothing ever got her anywhere. 

So now she sat, curled up on the sofa with the blanket as her only protection. Something that separated her from her captor, if in only a small way.

Coming soon...!

And if @the-writer1988 wishes to reblog with a Eugene POV snippet, she's welcome to!

[lunawings]

Yesterday was quite the emotional rollercoaster for me.

I'd been doing my best to stay positive about not making it into the idol showcase at PopCult, but, while I was waiting outside and already feeling slightly down I overheard someone say that they were surprised they got in considering they only learned their dance in two days or something like that. (It turned out in the end this person is AMAZING and that was well earned), but... I auditioned after practicing on and off for almost a year and I got waitlisted. But, also it's not like I don't understand why I was waitlisted either. Even though I started practicing early, I've had a lot of obstacles along the way. Specifically, it's been difficult to find places to practice due to the uhhh challenges presented by my place of residence. Also, not to mention, my body has been against me almost every step of the way. (To make a long story short, after much time trying to avoid and pretend, I've recently started embarking on a medical journey that's looking like it may end in me getting diagnosed in a... second autoimmune disorder......)

I tried to fight through these negative feelings and enjoy the show, but I just couldn't. Until. UNTIL.

Until people I knew began to take the stage.

Whenever I get to see people I know perform at idol showcases (and the number is slowly increasing every time) I... *ahem*... LOSE

MY

FUCKING

MIND AHHHHHH!!!!

Don't get me wrong, I loved going to big shows with professional idols in Japan. But this is like, a completely different kind of happiness. After some reflection, I realized that it's because it's not a parasocial happiness. I actually know these people and sometimes I even saw them practice and I know how hard they worked and what it means to them and I can go up afterwards and tell them how much I liked their show and they can be happy to see me too and thank me for coming and and and...

Yeah it's just, it... Being involved in the community brings me so much joy. I love love LOVE being able to cheer for my actual friends.

But. While I was still feeling down before the show, I took a picture of the stage. A picture I would use to upload to Idol Land PriPara so I could superimpose my idolsona, Luna, onto the stage. If I can't be up there, at least she can, I thought. Looking at that photo is bittersweet. Luna the idol has done so much for me. She's able to do all the things I want to, but I cannot. Even if my body breaks down, she'll keep on performing. For me. There is some crazy serendipity in the fact that this was the weekend Idol Land PriPara finally became playable.

I look at the picture. And I like it. But I also remember behind that photo is a somewhat sad and pathetic girl who grinded Idol Land PriPara for hours the night before instead of sleeping to unlock the character parts to complete her OCs look because she knew it was the only way she could get on that stage.

I might, if my body lets me, apply to an upcoming event. But either way, I am planning to take a long hiatus from my idol activities to reevaluate what kind of an idol I want to be and how I can perform. I hope to return to the real-life idol performing scene sometime next year with a new goal and a new energy.

[sasukimimochi]

Hi guys, so you might have noticed me being quite absent these recent weeks (which, at first bc i was just really drained) but shit's been hitting the fan recently one thing after another. I'm stressed and finding it hard to write at all despite wanting an escape from everything going on.

So as short an explanation as i can gather here...

I had to rush the man I live with to the hospital on my birthday, which some of you knew I had a rough birthday but not what happened. He's alright, but I spent six hours in the ER hallway while sort of frozen up, hoping that he didn't have a stroke or seizure. Luckily he didn't, but the experience obviously is changing how I'm treating his care at home so I can make sure it doesn't happen as frequently.

TLDR; spent six hours with the man i live with on my birthday at the hospital.

Then, my renters gave me a very impromptu notice that they're moving. They left the place pretty trashed outside and yesterday i was so stressed about it I was getting hella physical stress symptoms. (anxiety pins and needles, scalp tingling, fever) not to mention not having received the second half of rent, which was due already and hasn't been paid. Hoping to get someone new in but i need to write an agreement up to avoid stressors like last time...

TLDR; We're losing rent this month. Hoping to get someone new in but i need to write an agreement up to avoid stressors like last time.

+ We got an unexpected nearly 600 dollar charge from an insurance company (I need to make a call about it)

and there are a few more things I'm not going to list because of privacy but they're related to our home.

TLDR; All this is leading into me saying the next chapter for gom is very likely if not surely going to be delayed. I'm super stressed and its affecting my health because of all this irl business.

I will be trying to upload one thing this weekend I had prewrote before all this shit, which is a bonus scene for chapter 26 for a part i had to cut from it. I want to scribble something for it, but it might end up just as is, since this week is so terrible lkjfgdhfg

If any of you would like to help me out at this stressful time, i'll doodle mdzs for some donations (tell me an au of mine and who[max 2 characters], no specific requests beyond that) though it might take me a moment to get to them bc of all the stress. Send me an ask or a message on Kofi with your dono.