#He wrote on his insta post that he passed out on flight

[horrorbloodylover]

𝑆𝑢𝑐ℎ 𝑎 𝐶𝑈𝑇𝐼𝐸 🥰🥰🥰

Same pose

[fahrni]

Saturday Morning Coffee

Good morning from Charlottesville, Virginia! ☕️

I made it back home yesterday after a delayed flight and an unplanned overnight stay in Dallas and I’m happy to be here. I was able to kiss my amazing wife and sleep in my own bed. It’s amazing how uncomfortable someone else’s bed can be, especially as I’ve g in otten older. 😀

I hope you enjoy these hand picked, artisanal, links. 😃

Geoff Perlman • Xojo Blog

On November 12th Thomas Kurtz, the co-inventor (along with John Kemeny who passed in 1992) of the BASIC programming language died at the age of 96.

BASIC was the first language I learned and I’d say I owe my career to it.

RIP Mr. Kurtz. 🪦

Dan Milmo • The Guardian

In a post on X on Thursday, the author of The Shining and Shawshank Redemption wrote: “I’m leaving Twitter. Tried to stay, but the atmosphere has just become too toxic.” Referring to the rival platform launched by Mark Zuckerberg’s Meta, he added: “Follow me on Threads, if you like.”

I’m glad he finally made it somewhere else! Now all he needs to do is turn on Mastodon support for his Threads account so I can interact with him from the Fediverse. 😃

Federico Viticci • MacStories

Today marks the return of a very MacStories-y feature in one of my longtime favorite apps, which – thanks to this new functionality – is gaining a permanent spot on my Home Screen. Namely, the RSS client Unread now lets you create custom article actions powered by the Shortcuts app.

Unread is just killing it! John is on a tear adding new features and fixing bugs.

Manton Reece

I’m @manton on most networks, @manton.org on Bluesky, and @manton@manton.org on the fediverse. These are all managed by Micro.blog.

Yep. You can run everything through Micro.blog if you’d like to see Mastodon and Bluesky accounts natively. Oh, yeah, and there’s that whole blogging thing you get with it. 😃

Jason McFadden

Well, for some reason, last week I got the notion to re-try my RSS reader. Let me tell you, it was insta-awesome! It feels SO GOOD to be back on RSS. It lets me just read articles from the web — crazy, I know. RSS makes websites legible, stripping out all the distracting garbage.

I think RSS is pretty swell myself. I’m so fond of it I built my own feed reader.

Tom Bowman, Juana Summers, Scott Detrow, Greg Dixon, and Charles Maynes • NPR

Ukraine is granted permission from the Biden administration to fire U.S.-made long range missiles into Russian territory.

I’m happy we’ve done this. Poor Ukraine is going to need every tactical advantage it can get NOW. Pretty soon the Orange Turd will takeover and Ukraine is gonna be in trouble.

Tim Hardwick • MacRumors

Apple is facing an almost £3 billion ($3.78 billion) lawsuit after British consumer group Which? on Thursday alleged that the company breached competition law by locking millions of its customers out of its iCloud service and charging them “rip-off prices.”

I have a lot of thoughts around this and it would be nice to see Apple open the users choice of storage up in a way that makes it transparent to the user. We’ll see what terrible solution they come up with to make it so unattractive to the user no one will choose to use it.

The Guardian

The 40-year-old Minnesota native, who retired in 2019 citing the physical toll from a series of major injuries over the course of her 18-year career, told the New York Times that she had “retired with no intention of coming back”, but was startled to discover that she was pain-free after undergoing a partial right-knee replacement surgery in April.

Having a knee replacement was a freeing experience. Free from pain and free to move about without thinking about where I’m putting my foot. But, I cannot imagine putting on skis and going down a hill at breakneck speeds.

Pro athletes have a different gear than us normals.

Good luck Lindsey! 🍀

Emily Liu

On Bluesky, you can set your website as your username. This is one form of verification on Bluesky, and it’s our version of a “blue check.” We highly recommend that official organizations and high-profile individuals do this.

I thought I’d drop a link in here for this older post since Bluesky will let you set your own domain name. Mine is set to @fahrni.me. I love it!

[headoverhiddles]

Universally Loathsome - Marilyn Manson x Reader

Synopsis: After his show at the Hard Rock in Orlando, you and your man put your complimentary Universal Studios park passes to good use. 

Notes: I wrote this because Universal Florida is my happy place, and I need a pick me up right now lol. Also, this takes place right after this concert, so Heaven Upside Down era. 

His lazy drawl fills the Hard Rock Cafe arena, as the strobes go crazy.

"I love you beautiful motherfuckers so much," he points to the crowd, to a response of deafening cheers, "Florida's where it all started for me, and... I almost got arrested for indecent exposure in Jacksonville, which is... pretty close to here." More cheering. "So if any willing gentlemen in the crowd would like to come up here... and let me put my dick in their mouth..." The cheers grow. "...History can repeat itself." He grins, stumbling around and leaning on the mic stand. "I wonder what would happen if I... oops," he pops the top button of his vest open. "Oh no, I can't believe I just showed you all my tits, ahh, I'm such a slut..."

The crowd is going absolutely insane, and he winks over to you suggestively. You watch your boyfriend, trying to hold in your giggles. He's in what he likes to call rascal mode tonight, you can tell. And good thing-- you two roped complimentary passes inside the theme park for the rest of the night to celebrate, so he can let out all this energy after the show. The regular park closes in a half an hour, horror nights too, with it being Halloween, but the extra hour is just for you two, paid for well no doubt.

After Mar's done and the strobes distract the audience enough for him to bound off stage, he runs into your open arms. After you hug your sweaty man, he picks you up, spinning you around and smiling like a big kid.

"Let's go play." 

"Shower first," you give him a stern look. He nods, resigning himself to the fact that he's really gross and covered in sticky glitter makeup.

You hang out backstage as he gets cleaned up, saying goodnight to some of the roadies. You check social media and search for this concert, as you do sometimes just for fun, and see people already sharing photos they'd taken of Marilyn screaming or wading into the crowd.

You snort to yourself, and save one that looks right up his nostril. Beautiful angle, and perfect for blackmail when he's being a dick.

"Let's do this."

You turn, and see him dressed in a hoodie that reminds you of the full body zip from his High End Of Low days.

"I know what you're thinking, and no, this is not the depression hoodie," he sticks a finger in your face and wags it. "I burned that a long time ago." You pretend to bite his finger, and take his arm.

Your bodyguards, who warily agreed to leave the two of you alone once you get into the park, lead you down, out the back door of the hotel venue, and through a citywalk shortcut to the front gates of Universal Studios Orlando.

"I haven't been here since I was a teenager," you grin, listening to the entrance music and sighing from the nostalgia. "This has always been my happy place."

"I've literally never been here," he tells you, "We go to the one back home in LA, but I've never been to this one myself. I used to live here but I only ever wreaked havoc on Disney with Twiggy."

"Oh, Universal was spared?"

"Until now, yeah. So you'll have to be my tour guide here." He takes his sunglasses from his face, hands them off, and turns to his guards. "Okay, that's fine, we're fine."

"Sir, we really think--"

"We talked to the park operators, and there's like... nobody here right now, we're both fine," Marilyn insists, "Bye." So, you two are left alone as you walk toward the gates.

Your passes are scanned by an older woman who doesn't seem to recognize Marilyn, since his name on the pass is Brian. For the best. To your left, towers one of your favourite rides.

"The Rip Ride Rockit," Marilyn reads the sign, "Ooh. Ooh, I wanna do this. Fuckin cool looking."

"Bri, you get sick on roller coasters."

"I'm too drunk to be sick, the drunk sick makes me not motion sick."

"Well, glad to hear your body has a system," you sigh, and he takes your hand as you two run toward the lit up ride.

"You get to pick your song as you ride," he muses, "Motherfuckers should have my songs on here."

Because he likes to stir shit up and see what he can get away with, Marilyn uses a VIP lanyard with his face on it to get into the express lane.

"Uh..." the young employee hesitates, frowning, "Sir, this is a meet and greet for that concert, not for--" Marilyn puts his hood down, and the guy's eyes widen. He waves you both through, starstruck. 

"Whoever said you shouldn't use your fame to get stuff... probably wasn't even famous," Marilyn says, pulling you up the steps.

"What's the hurry?" you laugh, trying to keep up, "You're just gonna throw up all over me anyway."

"It's a music ride, that's very exciting to me," he says. You can't deny you've missed this ride too, so you keep up.

You're the only two on the roller coaster train as you both pull the bar over from the side to strap yourselves in. The employee working comes over to check, and gives a thumbs up to the operator.

"Give me a handjob," he giggles.

"No! I'm gonna rip your dick off if we do that on this!"

"Nah, that'd happen like... on the Mummy." Apparently he remembers what the Mummy is like in the LA Universal park, and he's not wrong. "Uh. Uh," he starts to snap his fingers as the ride goes up, "Yeah. Hell yeah."

"What song?" you laugh.

"Stronger, by my boy Kanye."

"He's a dickhead, you know."

"So am I, doesn't make my music any less amazing."

You smirk. You'd picked Stronger as well, anyway. 

After the ride, Marilyn hangs onto you, a little bit woozy. "That was a mistake."

"I told you."

"I don't listen, I'm a child, you know this. I don’t like the rides, but the rides like me."

You two walk through the park, past the San Francisco area of the water in the middle.

"This is nice. Just walking."

"Yeah," he says. "It's nice not to vomit." You rest your head on his shoulder, giggling.

You two do a few more rides-- he has way too much fun in Men in Black shooting at everything, and Simpsons becomes a favourite, even if the only part he could keep his eyes open for was the funny queue playing the episodes. He even takes some dark, creepy pictures with the employees in Diagon Alley, posing in his new Slytherin scarf he bought.

"Can this be used for sexy purposes?" he asks one of them, holding up a wand. The girls giggle, and you roll your eyes.

"Um. Wouldn't recommend it," one responds.

"On the other hand..." the second one shrugs, "It's magic. You could just make it into something that could be used for sexy times."

"I like the way this one thinks," Marilyn smirks. "(y/n), I'm gonna use this in you."

"Like hell you are.”

“Please?”

“You can use it to spank me.” You lean in to whisper. “It’s too thin to put it in.” 

Marilyn buys the wand just to make up for the trouble he's causing the poor employees.

You head out of Harry Potter world, and circle back around to do ET.

"I wanna do the Mummy again. And what about those big ones across the citywalk thing? Spiderman, he's cool. I wanna do his ride." 

"That's the other park. If you wanna deal with your manager having a meltdown by requesting another day here tomorrow, that's your call." He immediately takes out his phone, and you huff, feeling sorry for the guy, always having to rearrange flights last minute. 

"Yeah, hey. It's me," Marilyn drawls into the phone, "I need another day here tomorrow. No, I'm just... I'm gonna be really hungover. Lots of vodka and drugs and stuff. Yeah. Amphetamines, got my face in a big... yeah, really bad, I won't be able to fly tomorrow." His eyes light up like a kid in a candy store as he sees the Halloween Horror Nights 2018 tribute store. "Gotta go, I'm snorting coke off (y/n)'s tits. Cancel my flight!"

You both run in, and get shirts from inside-- yours is a Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers one, and his is a Killer Klowns from Outer Space one, with a little clown in boxing gloves on it that says 'Shorty's Boxing Gym: Knocking Blocks Off Since '88." He poses for a picture of the new shirt in front of an old horror movie poster, hands in his jacket pockets and doing his signature sneer. He posts it on his Instagram, captioning it: 

Next motherfucker's gonna get my metal. Pic📷: @(y/handle) #justustwoclowns #wannatussle #truelove #wehatelovewelovehate #happyhalloween #universalorlando #shooterjennings.

You head inside the Egyptian crypt that leads to the Mummy, listening to Brendan Fraser's fake interview about the strange things going on on set. 

"I met him once," Marilyn tells you, "He was scared of me, he thought I was flirting with him."

"I can see how he would. You're just overly affectionate," you pat his arm.

"And high as fuck, but I wasn't flirting with him. He's too much of a pretty boy for me." 

"Yet you still wanna fuck Johnny," you tease him, and he grins, unable to refute that.

You finally get to the loading area after Marilyn stumbles over four posts in the dark queue. The lady there squeals. She's a different one than the one working earlier, and she's obviously a fan.

"Sorry for her," her coworker says, "She's a huge fan of your stuff."

"Nah, it's cool," Marilyn offers a smile.

"I was at the concert, which is why I'm working late," she explains hyperactively, "God, you were soooo amazing!" Marilyn thanks her. She waves at you as well. "By the way, I see your pictures together on insta at shows and premieres and stuff, you two make a really cute couple. Goth icons!" You smile at the girl, and thank her and her coworker for working late for you two. An obligatory selfie later, you and Marilyn get into the ride, and start heading through the darkness. You get to the part where Imohtep's face appears and fire blows beside you.

"You say god," he mutters. "I say Say10."

You get off the ride, and you nearly lose your shit when you see the ride photo. You fall to the floor, and Marilyn looks up at the screen in inquiry.

"Oh my god."

"We're buying it!"

"Absolutely fucking not. Look at my chin!"

"I love your chins, baby."

"I only mentioned one, but thanks."

You dash over to the counter, ordering the picture in the biggest size. It's gold. In it, you've got one hand up happily, the other looped with Marilyn's, and you look generally normal, other than your hair blowing a little from the force of the acceleration. His eyes are glinting yellow from light reflection, so he looks legitimately possessed; he's got his chin pressed down into his neck folds, and his mouth is halfway open, like he just remembered something he wanted to say. It's the most awful picture of him you've ever seen, so naturally, it's getting framed at the house next to his lovely prosthetic limb collection.

"Mm, makes me wanna fuck you," you lick your lips, "Give it to me, baby, I wanna look into those sexy yellow eyes while you destroy my pussy."

"You're fucked up."

You nearly collapse in laughter again.

Despite the terribly candid ride picture, Marilyn decides he likes the Mummy a bit more than the Simpsons, and after riding it four more times without fail, he's nauseous as all hell (as are you) and done in for the night.

You hold hands, heading to the gates. "Hey. Want to stop at Ben and Jerry's on the way out?" you ask.

"Nah," he drawls, hand moving down to your ass and giving it a spank, "You're the only thing I wanna lick tonight." Even motion sick and half-way to hungover, he's still in rascal mode.

A car comes to pick you up, and some press follow you to the car for a bit, taking photos and asking Marilyn for comments on the park and the show until Marilyn wraps his Slytherin scarf around his face. He gets into the car with you, and rolls the window up. The paparazzi obviously saw the Instagram post.

That makes you think...

Messing around on your phone as you're driven back to the hotel, you giggle. Marilyn keeps looking over, but he's currently too nauseous still to speak. You giggle again, and send off what you'd just done.

"Happy Halloween," you grin, punching his shoulder playfully.

He looks at his buzzing phone, and snorts. His bad Mummy picture and stylish posing Instagram picture are side by side, with your accompanying text: "Get you a man who can do both." 

[newsbiteswithjennysok]

Aug 13, 2019

1. Riot police and protesters clashed at Hong Kong's international airport on Tuesday after flights were disrupted for a second day as the political crisis in the former British colony deepened. Thousands of black-clad protesters jammed the terminal with used luggage carts to barricade entrances and could be heard chanting, singing and waving banners, with some adorning eye patches in solidarity with a woman injured in earlier protests who lost an eye. Amid chaotic scenes officers armed with pepper spray and swinging batons confronted the pro-democracy activists and a number of violent scuffles broke out, resulting in arrests. It comes as Beijing has made ominous declarations this week branding anti-extradition bill activists, in their 10th week as 'mobsters', as a military presence, including tanks, started to amass on the Chinese border, in the nearby city of Shenzhen, amid fears of a military crackdown.

The financial hub has been rocked by protests over the past months against a now-suspended bill that would allow people to be extradited from the city to stand trial in Communist Party-controlled courts in mainland China.

The mass display of opposition to the bill has morphed into a wider pro-democracy movement that has thrown down the most significant challenge to Beijing's authority since the former British colony returned to Chinese rule in 1997.

The protesters have continued to urge the government to respond to their five demands, including a complete withdrawal of the extradition bill, an independent enquiry into alleged police violence and universal suffrage.

Apart from the rallies at the airport, around 500 medical workers reportedly staged silent protests in 13 public hospitals today over what they claimed was the excessive use of force by the police during clashes over the weekend.

Many medical workers were also wearing eyepatches in answer to the campaign. The protests were staged during lunch breaks and have not affected the operations of the hospitals, said local reports.

The city's leader today warned that protesters were pushing the city down the 'path of no return'.

2. Her Disney days may be far behind her but Bella Thorne still knows how to Shake It Up. The 21-year-old multihyphenate announced on Tuesday that she is making her directorial debut with a pornography film for Pornhub. She was at the helm of the X-rated movie titled Her & Him which she describe as a 'beautiful, ethereal film.'

'Her & Him is a modernistic, sexually explicit Romeo and Juliet-like depiction of two star-crossed lovers who have unbridled sexual longing for each other.'

Porn stars Abella Danger and Small Hands star in the flick as there were some tense moments documented in the clip including the male star reading a google search on the female performer's phone which read 'how to kill your boyfriend and get away with it.'

The film will hit the big screen for the first time next month as part as The Oldenburg Film Festival in Germany from September 11 to 15.

Shortly thereafter fans around the world will be able to watch Her & Him as part of the Pornhub Premium service.

3. Miley Cyrus pushed for 'therapy' before Liam Hemsworth split and pop star only began dating Kaitlynn Carter after both women left their spouses. Miley attempted to save her marriage to Liam Hemsworth for 'months.' She began dating Kaitlynn Carter after both women left their spouses. Liam, 29, finally addressed the split with a somber post on Instagram.  They reportedly separated in June but were last pictured together in July. 

4. Whitney Cummings said someone tried to blackmail her with screengrabs from her Instagram Stories after she mistakenly uploaded an clip to the site that showed her bare breast. The 36-year-old actress/comic opened up about the incident in a series of tweets Monday, one in which she showed off the shot of herself, in which she sat naked in a tub while holding onto a sponge. She claimed that the initial post was four months ago, and she's since been hounded by the would-be extortionists.

‘In April I accidentally posted an insta story that showed nipple. Once I realized, I deleted,' she said.

The Washington, D.C. native continued, 'The people who took screen grabs are trying to get money from me, some said they have offers to sell them, some are asking for money to not post the photo.'

The 2 Broke Girls star said that the crooks who tried to illegally make money off her miscalculated what they had - and what it was worth to her.

'They all must think I'm way more famous than I am, but they also must think I'm way more easily intimidated than I am,' she said. 'If anyone is gonna make money or likes off my nipple, it's gonna be me. So here it all is, you foolish dorks.'

'When a woman in the public eye is extorted, we have to spend time, money and energy dealing with it, hiring lawyers and security experts, and living with a pit in our stomach about when and how we will be humiliated.

'Because some of them might be dumb kids,' Cummings said she didn't want to name the people who were giving her trouble.

'I wouldn't want the stupid ideas I had when I was a teenager to follow me around forever,' she said, 'or else every time someone Googled me, they'd see me shoplifting a NO FEAR t-shirt.'

Cummings seemed to have her trademark sense of humor intact amid being threatened, as she reposted a shot her comedic colleague Bert Kreischer shared of his genitalia following an injury.

'I hate what those dorks tried to do to you – here’s an embarrassing picture of my testicles after I fell on a waterslide,' Kreischer wrote, to which Cummings wrote, 'This is what a true friend looks like.'

5. A Minnesota man who organized a meth-fueled 'death party' for his sick wife before her death was sentenced on Monday to three years in prison. Duane Arden Johnson, 59, from Searles, was initially charged with third-degree murder over  the death of his wife, Debra Lynn Johnson.  Debra, 69, died of methamphetamine toxicity on January 24 in the couple’s home in Searles, an unincorporated community in Brown County, according to the Mankato Free Press. Duane Johnson agreed to plead guilty to the lesser charge of felony neglect, the news outlet reported. A Brown County judge sentenced him to three years, with credit for 201 days already served. Johnson told authorities his wife begged him to take her home from a nursing home to die.

Johnson told cops that his wife couldn’t sleep anymore because she was shaking so badly and he didn't want to see her suffer.

He said that he promised her a party and that they had been 'rocking out' for three days.

Johnson said that his wife did not want him to call 911 as she did not want to be in pain anymore, according to the probable cause document.

He claimed the 'death party' started about five days ago and consisted of him playing rock music, especially their favorite song by Quiot Riot called 'Metal Health.'

Johnson also told police that Debra had wanted him to have sex with her before she died so he 'accommodated that request' and they had sex for around an hour and a half.

He claimed that he had been using methamphetamine for several days and that he had also given some methamphetamine to his wife around two days previously.

He indicated that his wife had smoked the methamphetamine and that she wanted to 'party' before her death.

Johnson claimed that his wife may have passed away around 8.30am that morning and he also told police she was on numerous medications.

However, he said she had not been taking them for a few days since she had quit eating and drinking. He said during the 'death party' he would go outside to get ice and feed it to her, as if they were ice chips.

[i-am-very-very-tired]

Hot off the heels of Coachella, trust fund babies and funemployed douchebags made plans to jet to Miami for the first-ever Fyre Festival. From there, the festival—which was slated to take place over two weekends, April 27 to 28 and May 5 through 7—promised to fly these VIPs to the private island of Fyre Cay in the Bahamas for an unparalleled concert-going experience. Tickets ranged from $4,000 to $250,000, which is a small price to pay for the best month of Instagram stories ever. Why not give that traditional Indian headdress you bought for Coachella one last chance to go Internet viral? But as we all know, when man plans, God laughs. And when that man is Ja Rule, and he’s planning a multi-day luxury festival full of amenities he’s incapable of providing, God is like “lmao.” According to an article in the Wall Street Journal earlier this month, festivalgoers who had purchased VIP packages were starting to get nervous, as “the festival’s ‘concierge’ team [had] been slow to provide them with logistical details.” Ja Rule and entrepreneur Billy McFarland, the co-creators of Fyre Festival, were doomed from the moment they decided to hype their event by bringing models to the Bahamas and sharing pictures of their sandy butts on Instagram. Bella Hadid, Hailey Baldwin, and Kendall Jenner were among the many models who arrived via private jet to take promotional photos and videos for the festival (almost all of these “influencers” have since deleted their Fyre Fest posts). Basically, if you ever hooked up with Justin Bieber, you were doing ads for Fyre Festival. Already, the festival was suspicious—the images shared on social media (#FyreFestival!) were pictures of known islands and locations in the Bahamas—not the elusive “Fyre Cay” where the festival was supposedly located. According to tourist website Exuma Online, people who actually live on Exuma had never heard of this Fyre Cay, and while private cays do exist in the area, they are relatively small, and would be incapable of accommodating thousands of party-goers. In other words, Fyre Festival was shipping its high-rolling (and highly gullible) customers off to the Bahamas under false pretenses from the very start. Potential Fyre Festival attendees were fed images of gorgeous models cavorting in the sand, and promised luxury villa accommodations, incredible food, a genre-spanning musical lineup, and even buried treasure. (Seriously, in 2017, are white people still getting scammed by the prospect of buried treasure?) But instead of living out their fantasies of being a Kendall or a Bella, festivalgoers quickly found themselves closer to being a Piggy or a Ralph. A source on the ground who wished to remain anonymous tells The Daily Beast the festival was in shambles from the get-go, explaining that guests arrived to what was supposed to a “tent village” but “the village is not finished. And there is no one in charge.” The source continues, “There was no infrastructure to support the 2000 people that had been expected and people began demanding their money back…There are reports that booze is being looted. I've heard one claim that at least 50 to 60 thousand dollars in booze was given away in order to keep people happy.” Artists scheduled to perform have also begun pulling out of the festival. One group of performing artists, the source says, was “placed in a house for lodging and had to leave as it was allegedly overrun with rats and rat shit.” North Carolina native William Finley told Billboard that his $2,700 “artist pass” was supposed to include an open bar, catered food, and overnight villas. Instead, he found himself lodged in “basically disaster relief tents.” “They're not that uncomfortable,” he allowed, “but the tents are so poorly made that they’d blow over in a second if there was any wind or rain.” A brief perusal of the #FyreFestival hashtag on Twitter includes rumors of violent altercations between festivalgoers and locals, non-existent “luxury accommodations,” packs of feral dogs and mountains of trash. One particularly haunting viral image shows one of the “catered meals” festivalgoers forked over thousands of dollars for: two pieces of bread, two pieces of cheese, and a handful of lettuce. Toto, we’re not in Indio anymore. Anna Van Amber and Trevor Sholders, both from Denver, corroborated the chaos to The Daily Beast. “Fyre Festival, more like liar festival,” Van Amber quipped. “it was completely falsely advertised, we were expecting a cool luxurious experience in the Bahamas, and we didn’t have a bed to sleep in last night.” She added, “The ‘gourmet chef’ is Costco hamburger buns with lettuce on it for vegetarians.” Starr Catering Group, which had originally signed on to cater the festival, told Buzzfeed that their contract had been terminated in early April. Sholders was similarly irritated by the organizers’ lack of communication, explaining, “We were in the dark about information up to the very last minute.” When Sholders and Van Amber arrived, they were led to a local bar, where they were left with their luggage all day, “from about ten in the morning to seven, eight at night.” “From the get-go, you could tell that nobody knew what was going on,” Sholders noted. Next, he says, they were brought to the tents, which were supposed to be reserved, and told to run and grab whatever shelter they could find. Trevor described the confusion of hunting for habitation: “Just trying to find out a way to stay warm and dry.” Sholders and Van Amber left the Bahamas with what Sholders describes as an “eye-opening experience.” “It looked like a refugee camp,” he says. Airlines began to cancel their flights to Exuma “due to overcapacity on the island” before the festival even began. Adding insult to incompetency, would-be headliners Blink-182 issued a statement Thursday, pulling out of the festival and explaining, “We’re not confident that we would have what we need to give you the quality of performances we always give fans.” This last-minute Blink-182 blue-balling was yet another blow to the beleaguered festival (the original lineup also included Major Lazer, Migos, and Lil Yachty). The Bahamas Ministry of Tourism issued a statement Friday, saying they are “extremely disappointed in the way the events unfolded yesterday with the Fyre Festival.” They offered “a heartfelt apology to all who traveled to our country for this event,” explaining that “hundreds of visitors to Exuma were met with total disorganization and chaos.” The Ministry also insisted they are not official sponsors of the festival, but had been falsely assured by the organizers about their ability to put on a safe and successful event. “Clearly,” the statement continued, “they did not have the capacity to execute an event of this scale.” The statement concludes with a promise to “assist with the organization of a safe return of all Fyre Festival visitors.” The Fyre Festival’s own website replaced its VIP package offers and colorful insta-ads with a solemn statement Friday morning, announcing that the event has been indefinitely postponed. It reads in part: “Fyre Festival set out to provide a once-in-a-lifetime musical experience on the Islands of the Exumas. Due to circumstances out of our control, the physical infrastructure was not in place on time and we are unable to fulfill on that vision safely and enjoyably for our guests. At this time, we are working tirelessly to get flights scheduled and get everyone off of Great Exuma and home safely as quickly as we can.” The Fyre Festival’s Instagram account has also disabled its comments section. While one Fyre Festival-goer tweeted a picture of attendees “signing papers for full refunds,” Anna and Trevor say that when they asked a festival organizer when they might get their money back, he told them to “call your banks and file a fraud report on your charges for the tickets,” adding, “That’s what I would do.” According to Trevor, “I don’t think they have the money to pay us back. There’s no refund.” Of course, given the festival’s numerous failures and the limitations of the local airport, attendees are suspicious that they will be able to get back to Miami any time soon. Van Amber and Sholders are wary of taking a Fyre Festival-organized shuttle to a tiny airport, considering that they and their fellow festivalgoers don’t even have return flights booked. “[The airport] literally holds about 100 people,” Sholders explained. “There’s no facilities there, no water, food, or anything…so if we all managed to get on a bus and get to the airport, we’d have one bathroom, and we’d just be sitting on the tarmac.” Really puts the awfulness that is Coachella into perspective. While Ja Rule was notably absent from his own dumpster Fyre, he issued a frenzied Tweet mid-Friday. “We are working right now on getting everyone of [sic] the island SAFE that is my immediate concern,” he wrote. “I will make a statement soon I’m heartbroken at this moment my partners and I wanted this to be an amazing event it was NOT A SCAM as everyone is reporting I don’t know how everything went so left but I’m working to make it right by making sure everyone is refunded…I truly apologize as this is NOT MY FAULT…but I’m taking responsibility I’m deeply sorry to everyone who was inconvenienced by this.” Meanwhile, internet sleuths are pointing fingers at Ja Rule’s potentially more culpable festival co-founder, McFarland, whose previous entrepreneurial endeavor—a “black card” for millennials—ended in a familiar call for refunds.