#Han fic

[hanjsquokka]

Hoodie - [ Han Jisung ]

🐿 SYNOPSIS : Jisung comes over to your apartment, but the hoodie he's wearing looks all too familiar

GENRE : established relationship, pure fluff

PAIRING : han jisung × fem!reader

CONTENT WARNING : none

WORD COUNT : 1K

You were greeted with silence in your apartment as you entered after a long day at work. Your boss always managed to make things ten times more frustrating than they needed to be. You spotted a sleeping figure on your couch as you walked by. Your boyfriend, Han Jisung — was a frequent visitor to your home (at least, on his free days he was). He shifted in his slumber, the anime running on the TV long forgotten.

As you drifted closer to him, you could make out the angle of his jaw line more clearly and his adorable cheeks weren't quite visible anymore. That made your heart ache. Going on tour was no easy feat, but seeing the love of your life so drained felt like a kick in the gut. Your hand moves to his hair on instinct, combing through the soft hair. You always wondered how his hair was so soft, despite dyeing it every few months.

"Hmm?" He groaned, his eyes cracking open a little to see you. "Oh, hey baby, I didn't hear you —"

"You can nap for a little longer. I'm going to shower and make some food."

"Is that food instant ramen?" He asked with a sleepy laugh.

"Don't hate on my love for noodles." You laughed, ruffling his hair a little more.

He pulled the blanket that was on top of him closer to his face. "Well, if you're going to take a while, I'll take a quick power nap I guess."

"You do that, baby." You got up from the couch and headed to the bathroom to take a nice, warm shower.

The shower really did wonders for your pent up stress. It felt like all of it washed off of you and went down the drain. Feeling refreshed, you wrapped a towel around yourself and went to your room to put on some comfy clothes. But the particular hoodie you wanted to wear was no where to be found. After spending about ten minutes emptying out the contents of your closet, you gave up and put on a t-shirt and shorts before heading to the kitchen to heat some water for your ramen.

As you were watching the noodles cook in the pot, you felt a pair of arms wrap around you, sending a wave of butterflies throughout your body. Jisung rested his chin on your shoulder, his grip tightening around your waist.

"The wonderful smell of instant ramen mix." He mused, his voice sending fluttering vibrations throughout your skin.

"Yeah. I should probably go and buy real food tomorrow." You said, turning around to face him. "I haven't had time to grocery shop —" You paused, your gaze falling on the piece of clothing he was wearing. The oversized grey hoodie you were looking for earlier! But how did Jisung did get. Or rather, how long did he have it? "Ji baby..." You started with a small chuckle. "Is this mine?"

Jisung looked like a deer caught in headlights- his perfect crime was no longer perfect. "N-No...?" He looked away, no longer making eye contact with you. You gave him a look. He sighed. "Yeah." He admitted. "But I only took it because I was going to miss you! You know I haven't been feeling well lately and going on tour was just going to make it worse — not that I don't like performing, I love performing! But I really missed you." He added that last bit quietly, pouting — making his cheeks full.

"It's okay. I'm very honored to have had my hoodie stolen." You said, pulling him away from the stove (and switching it off, you couldn't have another chuseok disaster, now could you?) "It looks cute on you." You wrapped your arms around his waist.

"You think so? I think I was wearing a bit too often though. The boys thought I lost my luggage and this was the only thing I had left." he told you, laughing at his own words. "I didn't even wash it for a long while until someone — I swear Felix is just too kind for his own good sometimes — threw it in for laundry. Your beautiful scent was washed away." He said dramatically. "All I had left was the thought of you wearing this before, hugging me like I'd disappear if you'd let go as I tried to sleep."

You laughed. "You're more dramatic than Hyunjin sometimes, you know? How about... I give you my perfume?" You suggested. "That way even if Felix is just trying to be nice and wash your clothes because you're too lazy to do so (Jisung squeezed your sides at that) you can just spray some perfume and voila."

He thought on that for a moment. "That's a pretty good idea. Time to raid your perfume collection as well."

"As well? Just how many of my things did you steal Han Jisung?" You asked seriously, but a giddy smile was on your face.

"Not much. Your hoodie." He gestured to the one he was wearing. "Your sunflower necklace you broke? Your fluffy owl socks you thought the washing machine ate. And..." He paused for dramatic effect. "Your heart." He added with a smug smirk, making you blush.

"You're quite the thief." You said through your giggles. "I can't believe you took my socks though!"

"Hey, those socks are so cute and so comfy."

"I know! I liked them so much. You saw how upset I was when they didn't come out of the washing machine."

"Yeah. But I needed them more." He shrugged nonchalantly, hugging you tighter, planting a kiss on your forehead. "Also, I think we can't eat those noodles anymore." Turns out you didn't switch off the stove. There was now a boiling mass of something in the pot.

You let out a sheepish laugh. "Yeah."

"It's okay bubs, let's order some takeout. Can't have my baby slaving in the kitchen when she needs to be cuddling me." He picked you up, causing yet another fit of giggles to escape your lips as he carried you back into the living room.

AUTHOR'S NOTE : this was so fun to write T-T i desperately need a han jisung in my life >_< the only that gets stolen from me are my answers on my test 😔

©hanjsquokka | copying, translating or republishing my work is strictly prohibited

[felixknow]

Pathetic!

han x reader/ (afab but one comment could be read as amab), friends to lovers, teasing, mutual pining/lust, blowjob, premature ejac., pathetic!han, loser!han and confident but simp!reader, 3k

Based on how Han... Adjusts... Himself...

Your friend Jisung has a… peculiar habit. 

You first noticed it when you agreed to a silly dinner party with your old trainee friends. Everyone decided to dress up in their prettiest dresses and most handsome suits to go to McDonalds at 10 p.m. and even though the food was greasy and near-tasteless, the company of your friends made it one of your favorite meals you’d ever had.

It was when everyone was cleaning up and getting ready to leave that you first noticed Han’s odd habit.

You were the last two to get up from the table. Most of your friends had already drifted toward the trash cans and the exit, and as you stood you watched as Han, who was not paying attention to you, unabashedly grabbed his penis through his pants and manually readjusted it.

Your eyes widened and you turned on your heel away from him, shocked but vowing to yourself that you’d never tell a soul you saw it, and sure you’d never see it again.

Until the next time it happened.

And the next.

And the next.

Considering the years you’ve spent in this friendship, it feels odd that you’ve only noticed this habit recently, but maybe he’s having some sort of issue, perhaps? Maybe his shaving routine has changed, maybe he’s wearing new underwear, maybe he caught something-- you don’t know and it doesn’t feel like your business at first. Or at the second, or third, or fourth occurrence.

It’s when you start to catch onto what makes him adjust himself so blatantly that you realize that it is your business. In fact, it starts to feel like it’s because of you.

There’s the time in the pool with your friends where you watch him off to the side in the shallow end readjust himself after you finish a splashing war with two of your friends, which somehow manages to nearly knock your top off.

There’s the summer sleepover where your tank top was lower cut than you intended, and through the glow of the firepit you could just make out the shape of Han squirming, his hand firmly latched between his thighs for a few moments.

There’s the time you and several of your mutual friends attend a SKZ fan meeting to support your favorite superstar, and sitting on stage Han tries his best to be casual as he adjusts himself moments after excitedly waving to your group, but boy is it obvious to your trained eye.

Almost every time you’ve seen Han in the past few months, there’s been a moment when his hand inevitably ends up wrapped around his cock, despite his pants being in the way.

It always comes after the lingering looks. It happens after the slight flick of his tongue across his lips. The prolonged eye contact. The rosiness of his cheeks when you come too close. The dramatic flair of him draping himself across you, or the grabby hands as he asks you to cuddle with him, or the feather-light touches on your back or your hip as he passes you in a narrow space.

There are two things you’re certain of at this point in your friendship:

Han Jisung is attracted to you, and you are so, so attracted to him.

Once this becomes fact in your mind, the game begins.

How long does it take to get Hanji to touch himself?

On some nights, it’s hours. On some, it’s minutes. Once it was even the very first thing he did when you walked in the room (maybe because you’d spent the previous night partying with him and may have drunkenly danced with him one too many times, or maybe it was because you’d texted him that morning that you’d had fun with him and want to go dancing with him again, or maybe it was because it was another movie night and you’d come in short pajama shorts and a t-shirt with a “fashionable” rip across your chest).

The second phase of the game starts after that night.

When will Hanji notice that I’m trying to bother him on purpose?

(The answer is “not until you tell him outright,” but we’ll get there.)

You have fun playing with him. At first it’s acting like you didn’t realize he was behind you, so you back up until your butt touches his hip or his crotch. Then it’s accidentally sitting so close that you nearly sit on his lap. One time it’s having “accidentally” put on too much perfume before getting in the car with Hannie after he offered to drive you to your friend’s place for dinner. Another it’s wearing a white top on a day when you know it’ll be rainy, and “accidentally” forgetting your umbrella so you show up to Han’s apartment with a mostly see-through top.

Each time you catch it, either from the corner of your eye or while outright staring at him. His hand goes down while he’s either looking away or trying to act casual. He grabs his penis through his pants so fully that you can see the complete outline of it as he shifts it to the side or pushes it down or otherwise readjusts.

It makes you wet, being so close yet so far from seeing it. Sometimes when he grabs it you swear you can see the defined tip or the swell of his balls pressing on the fabric as well, but it’s over as quickly as it began. Sometimes just the press of his hand down on his lap like a nervous little virgin unsure of how to control himself turns you on so bad that you’re squirming in your seat.

Oh, god how you’d fuck him. How you’d wreck his entire world. If only he wasn’t so god damned oblivious.

No matter how many times you try to catch his eye and pointedly look down to his crotch, or how many times you pull your top lower while directly in his line of sight, or even shake your ass when you know he’s watching-- he says nothing. He does nothing.

You know he notices. Oh, how he notices. His face turns red. He pulls a pillow into his lap. His voice cracks. He can’t make eye contact with you. He stutters. He stares at your chest when he thinks you aren’t looking.

And he wants, oh he wants so bad.

It finally comes to a head on the night you know for absolutely 100% certain that you’ve given him a boner.

It’s a game night with two of Han’s fellow SKZ members. You’re sitting on the floor in front of the couch and Han is behind you (at your design, of course). One of his legs is under him, and one of his legs is hooked over your shoulder. You keep your arm locked around it while you play Mario Kart, claiming that you need it because of the way you’re sitting. “I can’t hold my arm up at the right angle without it,” you whine. “I have to keep my controller all the way up here--” you gesture to holding the controller at your chest level rather than in your lap-- “otherwise the sensor doesn’t pick up.”

No one calls your bluff-- you’re lucky that when Felix handed you the controller he said that it was the finicky one that didn’t like to cooperate all the time. Thank you, Felix.

Every time you win, you throw your arms up and reach for Hannie behind you. He either gives you his hands and he leans his head down and you pet his hair. When you lose, you turn your head to his knee (or, after he shifts lower in his seat, his inner thigh) and nibble or just rub your face as if you’re hiding it in shame.

Within 10 races you know you have Han wrapped around your finger. Any time you turn your head to look back at him, he’s already looking at you. He can likely see straight down your top, and the combination of that with you touching his thigh leads to him needing a pillow in his lap to prevent the whole group from noticing his little, ahem… problem.

And then comes the break.

“Should we pause and get dinner?” Minho asks

“I was just thinking the same thing,” you chime in. “But the issue is I really want pizza from that one really good place that refuses to do delivery. Like, come on, your orders get mixed up a couple of times and you require ID to pick up food? It’s the 21st centuryyyyy,” you whine, throwing your head back against Han’s thigh.

“Oh, pizza sounds so good,” Felix says with a satisfied groan. “I can go get it if someone comes with.”

“Mm,” Minho acknowledges, climbing to his feet. “Let’s go. We can order on the way.”

After a brief discussion of what everyone wants, the two clear the apartment, and then…

Han clears his throat and shifts in his seat.

“Do you wanna play another round while they’re out?”

You put your controller down and spin around so you’re sitting on your knees, now face-first at Han’s crotch-- or rather, the pillow on top of his crotch.

“No, honestly Hanji, I’m so fucking sick of waiting.”

“What--” You grab the pillow and try to move it, and his eyes widen, his face a pure expression of shock, and he fights you to keep it in place. “No, no! I need that-- Y/n, stop!”

“Hanji, when are you going to tell me that I turn you on? I’m so tired of waiting.”

“You-- What? How did you--”

“Am I wrong?” you ask, finally letting go of the pillow and letting him hold it. You give him your best doe eyes, blinking up at him innocently. “That’s what you’re hiding, right? Because I keep touching you and because you can see my boobs, right?”

Han tries to say something but he flounders, barely making a full sentence.

“Hanji, I’m tired of you teasing me,” you whine. “You touch your penis in front of me all the time. When’s it my turn?”

“Y/N--” he gasps. You take the chance to grab the pillow once more and yank, swiftly removing it and throwing it across the room. His legs come up and his hands go down-- he tries to cover himself and hide, but you see the tent in his pants and even notice the dark spot forming on the crotch of his gray sweatpants.

“Oh, Hanji, you poor thing. Isn’t that throbbing?” you ask, sliding one hand up his leg, gently coaxing him to relax and slightly open his legs for you again. “I know mine is. Why don’t you let me take care of it?”

“Your… You’re…?”

“You’re so cute when you’re flustered. You’re such a sweet little thing. I could just eat you up.” You keep gently touching him, running your fingertips up and down his calf until he rests his leg on the ground again, now only his hands covering his tent.

“How long have you liked me, Hanji? You should have told me. I’ve been trying to encourage you, but I don’t think you’ve caught on, have you?”

“No,” he admits softly. “I thought… I thought maybe you liked that I was fawning over you?” he says unsurely. “I noticed a few times you were really close to me on purpose…”

“Yeah?” you ask, gently touching his hand while lying your cheek on his thigh. “Like when?”

“Like that time you were talking to me in the kitchen and then you bent down to get something and touched my… um, touched me with your butt. It was straight out of a movie.”

You giggle and manage to intertwine some of your fingers with his gently.

“You could have said something, you know. You blushed so dark I thought your head was going to burst. You were so red.”

“I was afraid you felt my dick through my pants,” he says defensively, but softly, almost like he’s afraid to speak too loud and burst the bubble that surrounds the two of you. “I was so hard.”

“I get you hard a lot, huh? Pretty much every time I see you I catch you touching yourself.”

“What?!” he asks, eyes wide, once again in that delicious look of shock.

“You have to readjust yourself. I see you. It’s really obvious the way you grab it, you know.” You voice drops to a whisper as you separate his hands and finally get a good look at his crotch. “It’s kind of…” your hand reaches out slowly, giving him the chance to stop you, but he doesn’t. “Like this,” you say, wrapping your hand around his shaft through his pants. Instead of trying to push his dick down or to the side, you drag your hand up until it rolls over the tip and off of him entirely.

Han moans, lifting his hips up slightly to chase the feeling of your hand. You smirk but try to bite your lip to hide it, wanting to keep the innocent yet frisky facade you’re upholding.

“No,” you say softly, wrapping your hand around his cock again. “I think it was actually more like this.” You twist your wrist slightly as you move down his shaft then back up, once again sliding your hand over his tip. This time you press your palm against it, slightly pushing his dick to the side.

“Hmm,” you hum, licking your lips. “No, that’s not quite right. Can you show me, Hanji?”

“Huh?” he asks through a shuddering breath.

“Show me how you grab yourself, Hanji. And then I wanna do something for you.”

“Okay…”

Han’s shaky hand reaches down and he grabs his dick, pushing it down and to the side. He shifts his hip, tries to act casual while trying to tuck his boner into a tighter area of his underwear but it does nothing to hide his erection once he releases it.

“Mm, always seeing you touch yourself has made me so jealous. And you get to play with it whenever you want. It’s my turn to touch it, isn’t it? Can I touch it, Hanji?

“You already did, to be fair,” he says, his normal cheeky self still shining through his nerves. “But, I mean, yeah… if you want to you can do whatever… if you want… I mean… What do you want to do?”

“What do I want?” you ask, smiling up at him. “Oh, Hanji, if we did everything I wanted, no one would hear from you for weeks.”

His face reddens again and he laughs softly.

“If I had known we were thinking the same thing, I would have asked you to do this a lot sooner…” he admits. A wide grin spreads across your face and you hum happily, tugging on his sweatpants.

“Let me suck your cock, Hanji. I’ve been waiting so long.”

“Don’t have to ask me twice,” he says, lifting his hips and pulling both his pants and his underwear down swiftly. His cock springs free, bouncing a little from the movement, and you have to bite back the “aww” that comes up your throat. It’s just so fucking cute with its pink tip and its honey shaft like the rest of his pretty skin and it looks so suckable and instead of saying anything you hum happily as you greeidly suck him into your mouth, barely giving him a second to adjust to the feeling before you’re bobbing your head and trying to gather as much spit in your mouth as possible to give it a good, wet glide.

Han moans loudly and unabashedly, throwing his head back and sinking into the couch, fully letting you consume him.

“Oh, fuck,” he whines, hips jerking up slightly. “Oh, fuck! Wait, wait, wait,” he says, sitting back up and gently guiding your head off of him. “Y/N, I think I almost came,” he whines, and your jaw drops.

“Hanji, that was fifteen seconds. That wasn’t even a minute.”

“I know,” he whines, chest heaving as he pouts and tries to calm down. “I don’t know, it just hit me and I felt like leaking.”

“-Leaking?”

“That’s what it felt like!”

“Hanji, don’t tell me you call it ‘leaking’ when you cum.”

“No! I don’t! I’m just saying this one felt like a leak like I was just gonna let it all down. You were sucking me like a straw and it was just gonna all come out.”

You stare at him for a few silent seconds and then, in shock at your own revelation, say “You are so wimpy. And pathetic. And it makes me so fucking horny.”

Han laughs just as much as he whines, throwing his head back and covering his face with both his hands.

“Y/Naaaaahhhhhh,” he whines. “You can’t insult me and then say it makes you horny. I don't know what to thiiiiink.”

“Think about my pussy, your bed, and hopefully the nearest condom.”

Han peeks at you through his hands for a few seconds and then nods frantically, trying to sit up and get to his feet.

“Okay, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Let’s go! What are we still doing out here?!”

As Han gets up, his sweatpants and underwear nearly trips him while he tries to step past you. You giggle, covering your mouth and watching his naked butt as he rushes down the hall to his room.

Oh, god, how you’re attracted to him.

[moonchild9350]

Need You

Summary: Jisung is a little needy for you.

Pairing: idol Jisung x fem reader

Genre: smut- 18+ MDNI please

Word count: 755

Warnings: cursing, p in v penetration, creampie (wrap it folks)

Note: Reblogs and comments are appreciated :)

This is in no way how Jisung is in reality. This is solely for fun.

Please do not copy, translate, modify, use, or repost this work elsewhere without my permission. ©moonchild9350 (2024)

Jisung came home in a rush.  He only had an hour before his next scheduled activity and he needed to see you now.  He unlocked the door, walked into your shared apartment, slamming the door behind him.  He rushed to the bedroom since you weren't in the living room or kitchen. You stuck your head out from the bathroom where you were doing your makeup.

“Hey Ji, you’re home e…” but you were cut off by your boyfriend giving you a heated kiss on the lips.  

“I only have one hour, babe, I just needed to see you, needed to feel you.” 

You nodded at his statement and wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer.  Jisung continued to press kisses to your lips, his tongue swiping across your lower lip, in which you accepted.  The kiss was hot and messy, as you knew Jisung did not have much time for sweet and slow, which you did not mind one bit.  

Jisung backed you into the bathroom counter, gave you one more peck, before turning you around so your back was facing him.  He looked at you through the mirror as he bent you over the counter, running his hand down your back before giving your ass a slap.  You groaned at this, clenching your thighs together.  You loved these quick fucks, where there was only raw emotion and desperation with your and Jisung’s actions.  

You rubbed your ass against his bulge, causing him to moan out and grasp your hips tighter.  He pushed your shorts and panties down to your knees, in a hurry to sink his cock into your sweet pussy.  Taking his fingers, he brought them down to your folds, collecting your arousal.  

“You’re already so wet for me babe.  I’ve barely touched you.”  

“It’s all for you Ji, only wet for you,” you whined.  

After a few more swipes through your folds, you felt the tip of his cock breach your pussy.  Jisung rocked his hips out of pure desperation, running his cock through your folds.  He needed you.  He wanted to hear your moans that always seemed louder during these quick fucks. He couldn’t fault you at this, as it seems like he always came the hardest during these moments too.  

“Put it in Ji, I’m ready. Go ahead baby.” 

“Always so good for me, my sweet baby.” Jisung pushed his cock in, bottoming out, his eyes rolling back in his head feeling how warm, wet and tight you are.  You were right there with him, moaning at the stretch from lack of preparation.  You loved that stretch, the fine line between pain and pleasure.  You knew you could take it, so you started rocking your hips back on his cock.  

Jisung loved this sight, watching you fuck his cock, ass bouncing as it hit his pelvis.  Gripping your hips tighter, he began pounding into you, his balls slapping your clit repeatedly.  Jisung fucked you hard and deep, there was no room for being gentle.  He wanted to get you to your release fast.  Taking one hand, he quickly wet his fingers, bringing them to your clit.  With the extra stimulation, you felt close, pussy clenching repeatedly.  Grasping the counter, you rocked back on Jisung’s cock matching his pace, both of you chasing your highs.  

With a few more thrusts, you were cumming, screaming Jisung’s name, knowing surely the neighbors heard you and would probably be filing a noise complaint.  Jisung grasped your hips with both hands once more and pounded deeper into you as he was close to his release.  Three thrusts later, he was cumming, filling you up with his cum.  He ran his hand down your back once more and leaned down to kiss your neck.  He then slowly pulled out, watching as his cum oozed out of your pussy and down your thighs.  He pulled his boxers and pants back up and grabbed a towel to clean you up.  Pulling your panties and shorts back up, he gave you a kiss.

“Thank you baby, I needed that.  Was thinking about you all morning.” 

You didn’t mind, not in the least.  You gave him one last kiss before you watched Jisung walk out the bathroom. You heard him put his shoes back on and walk out the door to head back to the studio. As you listened to his exit, you could feel his cum still seeping out of you, a reminder of what had just gone down, one of the best fucks of your life.

[casuallyimagining]

join the circus || hjs

han jisung x reader

"would you still love me if I dropped out and joined the circus?" when your graduate work gets the best of you, han is there to help

wc: 1,369 genre: fluff, comfort warnings: grad school is hard. that's it. that's the warning.

notes: happy hannie day!!! this is a wee bit self-indulgent, but I couldn't resist posting this for han's birthday. I hope you enjoy~

When Jisung walks through the door of your apartment, he’s surprised at how quiet it is. Normally, you’re the type of person to need background noise. Whether it’s music or a show, he’s not sure that he’s ever actually been in your house where there’s been nothing. Even at night, you usually have a fan or the air con running. 

The lights are off in the entry and living room, and for a moment, he considers that maybe you’ve stepped out for a few minutes. But his shoes slot right next to yours beside the door like always, so he knows that you’re home. The apartment isn't that big. He’ll just have to find you, then.

He’s careful with the paper bag that’s in his hands, makes sure not to jostle it too much as he makes his way from the living room into the kitchen. It’s precious cargo, after all.

He’d called you earlier when he was in the studio. His eyes were hurting from staring at a computer screen, so he’d figured, why not see what you were up to? Your class had started that morning, and he knew how anxious you always were at the start until you could get into a groove with it.

You hadn’t even greeted him when you’d answered the phone. “Would you still love me if I dropped out and joined the circus?”

He’d laughed, because the question was ridiculous. “What?”

You’d sighed, and he could tell that you put him on speaker phone. “I guess the circus part can be negotiable. It doesn’t have to be the circus-”

“Sure, sure. There are lots of jobs that don’t require a masters-“

“-So many jobs that you don’t need it for. Like a pirate. Or like… teenage mystery solving hippie-“

“-Which would of course require you to be remotely teenaged-“

“You know, that somehow seems more doable than this class right now.”

He’d cooed and put on a silly voice in an attempt to make you feel better, but by the time he had to get back to work, you’d still sounded just as dejected and frustrated as you had at the start.

It sucks when you get like this. It sucks to watch you get pulled under a pile of work and stress to the point where you’re barely keeping yourself above water. You’re in the home stretch, just five classes left. But he knows it’s still a struggle. You don’t even need your master’s–you’d gone for the degree solely because you’d be eligible for a promotion at work. He supports you. Of course he does. He just hates feeling helpless to help you.

The kitchen is a war zone. Well, not really. It looks how it normally does. But the air hangs heavy, tense and tight, like a heavy storm is gathering. You are the epicenter, hunched over the kitchen table, class materials spread out around you. Your laptop, your textbooks, a notebook that has seen better days, even his tablet, all on and open and you flit back and forth between all of them, searching for something. He watches as you sigh, propping your head up with your hand as you flip through your book.

“Jagi?” he asks softly. He stands in the doorway, unsure of how to enter your space. You jump, and your knee knocks against the bottom of the table. He winces as you swear and quickly grab the mug that almost sloshes tea all over your laptop. “Sorry, I-”

You turn to look at him, and for a second, it seems like you’re looking through him rather than at him. But then you blink, and your eyes focus on him. “You’re home early.” Your voice is soft, almost confused, and you sound utterly exhausted.

“Chan said I could.” Carefully, he places the bag down on the counter and reveals its contents.

You brighten immediately at the sight of the paper box. You’d introduced him to the bakery years ago, back when you were just friends on the precipice of something more. It had quickly become your place, its treats serving as a companion to uncountable moments in your relationship. Soft buttercreams for birthdays. Rich mousses for anniversaries. Delicate pastries for an everyday pick-me-up.

Today is a cheesecake day.

Jisung reaches down and opens one of the drawers, blindly grabbing at the utensils within before coming out with two spoons. “I thought,” he closes the drawer with his hip, “that maybe you’d appreciate some help with whatever that is.” He points at the book in front of you with the spoons accusatorily. 

“This,” you take the spoon he offers and playfully tap his hand with it, “is why you’re my favorite.”

“Aw, babe.” He pouts, forcing his bottom lip out just a little bit because he knows it makes you laugh. 

He’s mostly successful, a small smile turning the corners of your lips up. He plops himself into the chair to your left, carefully reorganizing your things so that there’s room for the bakery box between you. 

He lets you take the first bite–he always has–before sinking his spoon into the softness of the cheesecake. It’s plain, with a soft cake crust, your favorite from this particular shop. It’s quiet, and for a moment, he watches you eat. He knows you, and if he’s honest, he’s a little curious how long it’s going to take for you to focus back in on your work and the storm clouds to form again.

Three minutes, fourteen seconds, and three and a half bites of cheesecake.

“So what even is all this?” he asks when you tug your laptop closer. Lifting your textbook, he’s careful to keep his finger in the page you have it opened to as he checks the cover.

He expects you to make a joke, even a self-deprecating one, something ridiculous and overly dramatic and silly. He’s always loved how you can make a joke out of almost anything. But when you sigh and fiddle with the stylus for his tablet and refuse to even look up at him, he knows it’s bad. And his heart breaks a little bit for you.

“This is…” you pause, and he can see the gears turning in your head as you search for the right word. Finally, you find it. “It’s hard.”

“Okay.” Jisung nods. 

His brain is already in overdrive, thinking of ways he can help. He’s got no idea about anything you’ve been studying in your program, but he’s pretty good with schoolwork. For the briefest of moments, he considers calling Chan. Chan-hyung would know what to do. But quickly, Jisung shakes himself out of that train of thought. He can help. He can. He just has to figure out how.

“Okay,” he repeats. “You know some of this stuff already?” 

It’s rhetorical. He knows you do. You do it already at your job. This class should have been easy. Shame it’s not. He knows you were looking forward to it.

You nod, and he finds himself bobbing his head along with you. “Explain it to me.”

“What?”

“Walk me through your assignment. Let’s do it together.”

“I love you, Sungie, and I appreciate that you want to help, but-”

“No no no listen.” He leans forward and takes your hand, thumb ghosting over your knuckles. “The hyungs used to do it for Jeonginnie when he needed help studying. It really helped him, or at least he said it did.”

Suddenly, he’s questioning whether or not Jeongin actually found it helpful. Maybe he was just saying that to make the hyungs feel good. Should he text him to check? What if-

You sigh, and it drags him out of his thoughts. “I guess it can’t hurt.” A small smile tugs at the corners of your lips, and he can feel his heart soar just at the small motion.

He’ll sit at the kitchen table with you for as long as you need. He’ll listen to whatever explanation you’ll give him, ask questions when he’s too confused, nod along when something’s way over his head. Anything. He’d do anything if it helps you feel better. He’ll do anything to get you to smile again.

Hell, he’ll join the circus with you if he has to.

[itsasilentreader]

♬⋆.˚ 𝐁𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐞𝐝 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐬 ― 𝐇𝐚𝐧 𝐉𝐢𝐬𝐮𝐧𝐠

. ܁₊ ⊹ . ܁˖ . ܁. ܁₊ ⊹ . ܁˖ . ܁. ܁₊ ⊹ . ܁˖ . ܁. ܁₊ ⊹ . ܁˖ . ܁

. ܁₊ ⊹ . ܁˖ . ܁. ܁₊ ⊹ . ܁˖ . ܁. ܁₊ ⊹ . ܁˖ . ܁. ܁₊ ⊹ . ܁˖ . ܁

𝙋𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜: idol!Jisung x GN!reader, established relationship

𝙂𝙚𝙣𝙧𝙚: fluff

𝙒𝙤𝙧𝙙𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩: 1.5k — 10 𝙢𝙞𝙣 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙

𝙏𝙒/𝘾𝙒: burned food, thats it

𝘼/𝙉: This was requested! I loved to write this one because this is inspired by something I did a few weeks ago. I tried to surprise my bf with cooking so he didn't have to do all the work but I failed, big time :') Hopefully, you'll enjoy it!

⤷ 𝘊𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘑𝘪𝘴𝘶𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘩𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘥𝘢𝘺 (𝘨𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘸𝘳𝘰𝘯𝘨).

⋮ 𝗠𝗮𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝘀𝘁 | 𝗛𝘆𝘂𝗻𝗷𝗶𝗻'𝘀 𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻 | 𝗝𝗶𝘀𝘂𝗻𝗴'𝘀 𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻

. ܁₊ ⊹ . ܁˖ . ܁. ܁₊ ⊹ . ܁˖ . ܁. ܁₊ ⊹ . ܁˖ . ܁. ܁₊ ⊹ . ܁˖ . ܁

Jisung was tired. He just wanted to go home, cuddle with you on the couch or in bed, and watch Spirited Away. Comeback season was upon them, and he still wanted to spend as much free time with you as possible before he got too busy. After a few years together, you were used to him being so busy during comeback season, but you still wanted to make the most of the free time you had together before and during this time.

Jisung loved that about you. You knew how busy he could get because of his career. The long days, touring, and comeback stages were a part of his job and his life. Sometimes he wouldn’t come home to sleep. He would just sleep in the studio and continue the next day. You did express to him that you thought it was unhealthy to stay in his workspace for so long without having a break. And you meant really have a break. Closing your eyes for a few hours in the studio, waking up, and going straight back at it didn’t count.

You didn’t want him to overwork himself and at least come home in the evenings. Your shared apartment was only 15 minutes from the studio, so it wasn’t even a long commute home. You managed to talk him into coming home to sleep, even if it was in the middle of the night, so he could sleep in an actual bed with you and rest.

If he had an early morning and you had time, you’d wake up with him and make him breakfast while he got ready. You’d eat your breakfast together before he would leave for the day. This way, you’d still spend some time together. Other times, you would order takeout for him and his members. You’d bring it to him and eat with them. If they were really busy or behind schedule, you’d drop it off with a kiss and just eat your dinner at home.

Sometimes he wondered why you hadn’t left him yet. During comeback seasons, he was just so busy, he barely had time for you and your relationship. However, he found it difficult to communicate it when those feelings surfaced. He was scared you would realize you deserved better and leave him.

“You let me know that you are too busy and stressed to do anything with me. I know it has nothing to do with me and this is what your job requires of you. Yes, it is hard sometimes, and I miss you at times like that, but I love you too much to just give this up. I know that if the roles were reversed, you would support me and my dreams too,” you had said when he gathered the courage to address this to you.

After saying goodbye to the members, he quickly grabbed his stuff and went on his way home. During the day, you’d texted him that you’d be in charge of dinner tonight to surprise him. It brought a smile to Jisung’s face but also some concern. He knew you weren’t the best at cooking; that’s why you brought him and his members takeout on busy days instead of home-cooked meals. You could make simple things like scrambled eggs and warm up some soup, but that was about it.

It’s the thought that counts, Jisung told himself. He didn’t want to discourage you from trying new things, like trying new recipes. He texted you he was on his way home and couldn’t wait to see you. Putting his phone back in his pocket, he put on his headphones and went on his way.

Upon arrival at your shared apartment, he could hear your voice vaguely through the front door. He chuckled to himself and entered the home. Your voice echoed through the hallway, trying to rap Jisung’s part in a song of his you’d put on. By no means were you a rapper, but he could hear you having fun and moving around in the kitchen.

He quietly trekked to the kitchen to see you in action. You were moving to the beat of the music that was playing through the speakers in one of his oversized shirts. This was one of Jisung’s favorite sights: you being carefree and having fun, even if you were alone.

You cut up the ingredients before adding them to the pot on the stove. You grabbed your phone that was lying on the counter to read the next step of the recipe. While your back was turned to the doorway, you hadn’t noticed Jisung standing there leaning on the doorframe with crossed arms and admiring you.

In the most terrible pitch ever, you started rapping along with the music again. You added seasoning to the ingredients on the stove and read the next step again. Unbeknownst to you, the gas stove was on way too high and the food in the pan was slowly beginning to burn.

The burnt smell flowed through the kitchen and reached Jisung. He frowned and uncrossed his arms. You still hadn’t noticed he had come in and you definitely didn’t notice that the food was burning. Jisung reached out to you, and before he could tap your shoulder, you turned around.

You shrieked out in horror and dropped the cutting board with vegetables from your hands. Your hand clutched your chest as you recovered from your scare. “Ji, what the hell?! You scared me.” You let out a breath, and Jisung chuckled at your reaction. Before he could tell you, you already smelled the burned food. “Oh my god, no, I burned it!”

You rushed over to the pan and turned off the stove. A lot of smoke was already coming from the pan and filling the kitchen. The hood above the stove apparently wasn’t strong enough. Cursing and whining, you got the hot pan off the stove and threw away the burned food. You placed the pan back on the stove to cool off and turned around with a pout.

Jisung had to hold back his laughter when he saw your pouty expression. He opened his arms, and you immediately rushed forward to wrap your arms around him. Still chuckling, he gave you a kiss on top of your head and hugged you tight. “For once, I just wanted to surprise you with your favorite food, but I can’t even do that...” you huffed out against him. Pulling back slightly, Jisung looked at your face. He could tell by your eyes that you were frustrated with the situation. He pecked your lips before speaking up, “Don’t worry about it, baby. We’ll cook something else together.”

“Or…” you dragged out while your pout turned into a sheepish smile. “We can order takeout?” How could he say no to your adorable face? He nodded, “We’ll order takeout, less fuss after your little accident.”

Your eyes narrowed and you gave him a pointed look. “I’m kidding, I’m kidding, babe. It’s the thought that counts, and I love that you tried cooking for me.” He smiled at you. “Nice save, Ji, you’re lucky I love you.” You huffed out, and Jisung let out a laugh at your reaction. Stepping out of his embrace, you cleaned up the mess you made and grabbed your phone off the counter. “You go and change; I’ll order takeout for us. Pizza?” you asked as you ushered him out of the kitchen. Jisung replied with a ‘yes please’ while walking down the hall to your bedroom to change.

You let out a groan when sitting down on the couch. This was not how it was supposed to go tonight. You just wanted to surprise Jisung with his favorite food, go to the convenience store together to get the cheesecake slices he loves, and watch some Studio Ghibli movies. I guess you can still go out for dessert or order it with your takeout.

As Jisung came back into the living room, you placed your order (with desserts). Setting down your phone, Jisung cuddled up next to you on the couch. While he was trying to find the most comfortable position, your hand ran softly through his hair. Passing the remote to Jisung, he put on Spirited Away and went straight back to enjoying the feeling of your hands in his hair.

After a while, your pizza arrived and you started to dig in. Halfway through the movie, Jisung turned to you with a soft smile on his face. His boba eyes admired you from the side as he soaked up this moment with you. Such a small and simple gesture meant the world to him.

“I know this is not how you’d hoped the evening would turn out, but I appreciate you looking after me,” Jisung spoke, his voice filled with warmth and love. You turned your face to him, mid-bite. Quickly swallowing your bite and almost choking on it, you returned his soft smile. “Anything for you, my love.”

He gave you a soft kiss before turning his attention back to the TV and his pizza. Jisung was content. He had everything he’d ever wanted: a career he’d always dreamed of and he had you.

. ܁₊ ⊹ . ܁˖ . ܁. ܁₊ ⊹ . ܁˖ . ܁. ܁₊ ⊹ . ܁˖ . ܁. ܁₊ ⊹ . ܁˖ . ܁

Ⓒ︎ 𝗶𝘁𝘀𝗮𝘀𝗶𝗹𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿. 𝘈𝘭𝘭 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘴 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘦𝘥. 𝗗𝗼 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝘳𝘦𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘰𝘥𝘪𝘧𝘺 𝘮𝘺 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘵.

[taeminsung]

♡ ˚⁎⁺˳ ── love song..

pairing || han x reader summary || han realizing his feelings for you. genre/s || fluff. comfort. mina’s notes || please enjoy ♡ 

Sleep clung onto Han as he stood clutching his pillow to his chest. When Chan said they were going to do a small weekend getaway, he didn’t think that it meant having to be awake before the sun was up. Trying to focus on the horizon, he noticed that the sun wasn’t even trying to break through the darkness of the night. Slowly a sleepy scowl formed across his brows while a small group of them waited for the cars to be pulled around. All Han wanted to do was crawl into the back seat and immediately let sleep claim him as it did just hours before. Hearing your name roll off Felix’s tongue caused his attention to snap to where his friend was looking. There you were, approaching with your suitcase in toe, sleep written all over your features.

Did this mean that you were coming along? Of course, it did, he mentally sasses himself knowing that no one just has a suitcase at this hour of the day unless they were going somewhere. He really needed to go back to sleep before interacting with anyone. You mumbled your hellos to everyone, letting Felix pull you slightly closer, as you tugged the sweatshirt that consumed you closer to your body as your shifted from foot to foot. Han couldn’t help but steal glances at you. You were stunning this early in the morning. It makes him want to wake up to you every morning, just to see this side of you that clearly has no guard up. It was only for a moment that he daydreamed of what that future would be like with you.

Minutes passed before the cars finally pulled around, with everyone quickly moving to grab their seats. Han watched as you grabbed your stuff and put it in one of the cars before he quickly followed behind, hoping that you’d sit in the back rather than the front. He thanked whatever lucky star he could wish upon as you said you’d sit in the middle seat so the boys could be comfortable. Climbing in the back seat next to you, he couldn’t help but feel a little dizzy being this close to you for the first time, nearly wanting to pass out at the smell of your perfume. The scent he tried to commit to memory. Han knew that he was in trouble before, but now? All he could think about was how screwed he was going to be on this trip, trying not to make his feelings for you obvious.

Within no time of hitting the road, did sleep consumed him again, this time dreams were filled with thoughts of you.

The sound of the youngest singing loudly woke Han from the slumber he was in, trying to ground himself back in reality. His confusion only deepened as he felt the weight of something on his shoulder, turning to find you fast asleep, lips slightly parted with the hood of your sweatshirt obscuring the top half of your face. Part of him couldn’t grasp if he was still dreaming or if this was in fact a reality in which you were passed out using him as a pillow. Glancing forward, he caught the small smirk on Minho’s face before his eyes shifted back to the road. This had to be real, right?

A few songs passed before you started to stir, Han immediately wondering if him talking with Felix on your other side woke you up. His eyes watched you from the corner as you clicked the lock button on your phone, illuminating a photo Han didn’t even know existed. It was the two of you in Chan’s studio, you with headphones on listening to one of his unfinished songs, him looking at you trying to gage your reaction to it. It wasn’t a day that he could easily forget about. Hours had been spent with legs almost touching as you helped him work through his writers’ block, finding different ways to say what he wanted to say. It was the first day that he admitted his feelings not only to himself but also to Minho.

Your leg had been pressed against his just like it was now, and as Jeongin started singing another song did Han realized you hadn’t moved an inch to remove your head from his shoulder. He watched from the corner of his eye as you unlocked your phone, opening different apps to check your socials, seemingly content with your position in the car. Panicking internally, Han now planned a way to tell you his feelings, because there was a fleeting moment of hope that maybe you returned the feelings and would accept his love. Would he have time to write you a love song, he thought.

from mina with love ♡ ˚⁎⁺˳ ── thank you for reading! ♡ requests are open.

[jinxhallows]

kinktober #oo3 | my turn

KINKTOBER 2023 || jinxhallows my turn (role reversal) || jisung x fem!reader summary: you have the coolest partner in the world, the literal rockstar Jisung of the band Eternal, and the best part? you knew he was one before the rest of the world found out. you two met over a shared love of music, and you let your dreams fall to the wayside to support his. but when jisung hears you with his band for the first time, the roles are reversed, and he becomes your biggest fan. warnings: rather fluffy for kinktober, plot heavy, pet names, established relationship, non-kpop idol AU.

word count: 3.2k masterlist - click here

You’re a supportive girlfriend, so it's your job to be the one front and center when your boyfriend performs at festivals, waving a big sign around like an average fan, despite the badge hanging from your neck indicating you were very much not an average fan, and had full and complete access to the artist.   Jisung is undoubtedly a rockstar, the charismatic lead guitarist and vocalist of the alternative rock sensation, Eternal. Following the blazing success of their recent single on the radio, their demand has skyrocketed, securing them bookings at renowned festivals with extensive media coverage.    But your unwavering enthusiasm for Jisung's music dates back to the days when it was just him and his band in a rented-out rehearsal room inside an old warehouse in your hometown. There, you'd watch him perform, feeling your heart swell with pride and admiration as he poured his soul into his music, singing about his tumultuous past. 

In the last two of your five-year relationship, Jisung has been urging you to step into the limelight with your own unique voice. He's convinced that your vocals have a distinctive quality, a gritty edge that perfectly complements grunge and rock music. However, you've hesitated, recalling your past as a pop artist that didn't quite take off. You're afraid of experiencing the heartbreak of the music industry all over again. 

It's been easier to live vicariously through Jisung's success, still being close to the music scene that makes you feel alive. Your dreams haven't faded entirely, but for now, they simmer on the backburner. 

  After a year of pestering you, Jisung manages to convince you to get on the microphone after you two have shared a few beers and a couple of shots in between runs of his set at rehearsal.  You’re barely walking, and he’s pushing you while you make an effort to lean back against him, half fighting and stumbling your way up.    Giving him a sideways glance, he winks at you and turns to his rack of three guitars. He selects his vintage strat, slides the leather strap over his head, taps his foot on his pedalboard with a dozen pedals, exchanges nods with his drummer and bassist, and begins strumming chords.   

As the chords fill the air, they feel almost deliciously right, which is no surprise. Jisung knows your musical tastes well—Nirvana, Alice in Chains, Staind, 3 Doors Down, Nickelback—and he's giving you something distinctly different from his usual style, something that resonates with your soul.  You close your eyes, furrowing your brow in concentration as you sway to the chords. Then, you open your mouth, and the words flow effortlessly:    My anxiety,    It just ain’t been getting down with your sobriety    As the words leave your lips, you're pleasantly surprised at how good they sound, both vocally and lyrically. 

Jisung signals the band to continue with a circular motion of his finger. He adjusts his playing to complement your voice, encouraging you to keep going. 

Closing your eyes once more, you raise the microphone to your lips: 

  My anxiety,    It just ain't been getting down with your sobriety    And I can tell how things are changin’ cause you’re just like me.    The next set of words come to you within seconds.    And I’m gonna take you to that place where you don’t wanna be, don’t gotta be.    You hear that familiar switch and whirr of the high pitched amp as Jisung switches pedals again, the sound harder, with more overdrive.  His strumming pattern has changed, and it makes you feel like a chorus should come out naturally.    Take me out onto the wide and open roads,    I’m just waiting for you to tell me when to go.    We can take it slow,    I don’t have to know.    But I can’t promise that you’ll find your way back home.    You're completely immersed in the world of your lyrics, lost in the music until you hear Jisung's whistle followed by hearty laughter as the band comes to a stop. 

Jisung steps on a pedal, deactivating the overdrive, and asks, "Holy shit, did you write that, y/n?" 

You shrug, "No, it just came out—the way you were playing, that's just what came out." 

He widens his eyes, brows raising in surprise. "Wait, you mean to tell me you came up with that off the top of your head?" 

You look at him, puzzled. "Jisung, we do this at home all the time. We freestyle together when we're drunk. I used to be a musician. Is this new information?" 

He clicks his tongue, narrowing his eyes. "Don't be a smartass. You know I've never heard you with a live band. When we freestyle when we're drunk, you don't come up with stuff like that. That was... poetry." 

  Jisung steps back and adjusts his pedals, strumming lightly. "Do the same thing, but Troy, hold out that E string through the first eight bars." 

And so, your very first alternative rock song, 'Home,' was born during an organic jam session. It was so impressive that Jisung funded its professional recording in a studio and helped you release it as a single, under his publishing. 

  You landed 68k streams in the first week.    People were hungry for more.    The band lent their full support as you embarked on your first major project, a small EP comprising eight remarkable songs. The pinnacle of your excitement came when you received news that you were invited to perform at none other than the prestigious Coachella festival. 

Your excitement matched the enthusiasm radiating from Jisung. He couldn't contain his joy, and as the news broke, he screamed, hugging you tightly and even jumping up and down with sheer delight. When he finally released you from the hug, his eyes sparkled with genuine excitement as he looked into your eyes. "I get to be your groupie now," he exclaimed.    & Jisung meant that shit.    He purposefully schedules a leg of his tour to leave that night open so he can be free to attend and play for your performance, instead of the hired gun guitarist that takes his place when he has to prioritize his own band.  He’s headlining a top venue in the city the next night, but tonight is all about you.      But for tonight, Jisung is your guitarist, so he can’t wave a sign in the crowd for you like you do for him, so he gets a little creative.  As the band began playing the intro to your song, the stage lights transform into a dim, muted blue, and you gaze out at the vast, massive crowd before you. It is undoubtedly the largest audience you have ever performed for in your career. 

Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed Jisung stepping up to his microphone, still strumming his guitar. "Tonight is special to me, to be playing for Y/N, really, it's an honor," he announced, causing you to cover your mouth and nose with your hands, concealing your wide smile as the crowd erupted in cheers, urging him to continue. 

  "I am her biggest fan, and it sucks that I can't be in the audience, watching you do your thing from their point of view," Jisung continued with effortless stage presence. Laughter and whoops filled the air as he spoke, still strumming his guitar. "You guys are some lucky motherfuckers." His stage presence is effortless as the crowd reacts with laughter and whoops.  He’s still playing, the band perfectly vamping the song in the background as he points to the front row, “So I gathered some fans to help me out tonight.”    Before your very eyes, signs go up one by one across the front.    M A R R Y  M E ?    You take a step back, your eyes widen as you squint to see. The crowd's deafening roar and the giant screen above capture the moment, alternating between the sign and your bewildered expression. It's a surprise you could never predict.   

"Jisung—" you begin to exclaim, but your voice breaks into sobs as he embraces you tightly. The band briefly pauses, and the crowd's cheers grow louder. 

"It's okay, baby," Jisung reassures you, laughing as adrenaline courses through him. He rocks you from side to side, and then, he pulls out a box from his back pocket, dropping to one knee. With tears in his eyes, he opens the box to reveal a stunning ruby ring surrounded by diamonds on a gold band. He wipes his cheeks, trying to maintain composure as emotions overwhelm him. 

Your shocked reaction, a mixture of surprise and joy, draws raucous laughter from the audience. You hadn't expected him to propose right then, and you had no idea he had a ring. You don't even know any of this has been planned. As you say yes, barely above a whisper, you nod and let him slip the ring onto your finger.  It rests perfectly between the silver carved wolf ring on your pinky and the owl eyes ring on your middle finger, with turquoise stones set into the irises.  It's a ring that proves he knows you well and listens to the things you love and want.  You hadn’t mentioned wanting a ruby engagement ring since you first started dating and it came up randomly when you two were at a mall together and happened to pass them by. 

  -  “Do you like this one?” Jisung asked.    “Nah, too traditional.  I love rubies.  I’d love a ruby one.” 

-    Now, you shiver with emotion, looking down at the ring and sniffing as he stands up to kiss you. It's a brief kiss, but you know there's more to come later. He steps back, never taking his eyes off you, and the introduction to your song begins once again. 

Through your tears, you laugh. "Now I have to sing the song, asshole," you tease.   

Jisung chuckles with the crowd and leans over to quip into the microphone, "Yeah, but you got this, rockstar."   

As you prepare to start singing, the crowd's voices join in unison, singing the opening phrases with you: 

"My anxiety..." 

You feel a surge of happiness and gratitude as you close your eyes and sing the lyrics, your voice soaring as the song reaches its climax and descends gracefully, like a plane landing smoothly. The audience erupts in applause, and soon after, you find yourself in the dressing room. You're sweaty, makeup smudged from tears, but you're buzzing with excitement. Your heart races, and it feels like a fluttering butterfly has replaced it, its wings sending a rush of blood through your veins. 

Your team rushes in, surrounding you in a massive group hug. Some of them hold bouquets of flowers, and your manager pops a bottle of champagne, filling flutes for everyone in the room. 

"Attention, everyone, I need to make a toast," your manager announces, raising her glass above the chatter. The room hushes. "To new beginnings!" she declares, and everyone cheers, clinking their glasses together. You raise your glass from where you sit on a makeup table, taking a sip as the room bursts into conversation again. 

Suddenly, the door swings open, and Jisung walks in, greeted by more whoops and cheers. He's visibly exhausted from his set and the emotional rollercoaster of the night, but Jisung plays along, accepting the enthusiastic welcome as he makes his way over to you. 

"Han Jisung!" you exclaim, shaking your head as he wraps you in a warm embrace. Your legs wrap around his waist as he hugs you tightly, planting a kiss on your lips and looking into your eyes. 

"It sounds even better now that it's gonna be your last name," he says with a grin. 

"Let's take this to the afterparty!" your drummer yells, and everyone starts gathering their belongings, excitedly agreeing.   

"Leo, we're playing Thunder Eagle tomorrow, don't get too messed up, man," Jisung says over his shoulder, calling out your shared drummer, who rolls his eyes.    “I’ll be cool Jay.”    “I’m serious.”    "I'll make sure they behave," Jisung's manager chimes in, patting Leo on the back and pointing towards the door, silently advising him not to argue tonight.  

Jisung is a Virgo, a perfectionist, and he wants his set to be flawless, even if it never quite reaches his impossible standards. She reassured him that everything would go according to plan so he could enjoy his proposal night.   

"Thank you, Rina," Jisung says. 

Rina nods. "Meet us back at the hotel. We need to go over tomorrow's itinerary." 

She knows Jisung has no interest in afterparties, especially not tonight. His social battery is drained as well. 

After Rina leaves, the steel door slowly closes behind her, and you and Jisung let out synchronized sighs, followed by shared laughter. Those sighs communicate everything you both feel—the relief of finally being alone.   

"Wow, I can't believe I got backstage with Y/N," Jisung teases, his eyes playfully wide. 

  "Got past security and everything, huh? You must've really wanted to meet me," you playfully comment.   

"Of course," Jisung responds, placing his hands on both sides of your face and looking into your eyes. "I told you, I'm your biggest fan." 

And then, Jisung kisses you for real this time, like he means every bit of it. Your head tilts to follow the rhythm of his tongue as it rolls over yours, and you give him a forceful shove backward as you hop down from the countertop. He stumbles back a few steps while you push his leather jacket off his shoulders. Eventually, he lands on the black futon, looking up at you with a crooked grin as you straddle him. Your knees sink into the leather, and you can feel just how aroused he is when you lower yourself against him. Both of you are still clothed, and you rest your arms on his shoulders, your breasts grazing against his chin as you start grinding in his lap. 

"You're my biggest fan, Jisung?" you inquire, your voice low and teasing. 

"I am," he confirms, his eyes lifting from your chest to meet yours as he answers your question. His arms wrap around your waist, pulling you down firmer onto his lap. 

You lean in close, murmuring in his ear, "Wanna be my groupie?"   

"Mhm, I do, I do," Jisung breathes, his hands gripping your ass. 

But then, you stop, lifting yourself up slightly.   “Let me fuck you then.” you say with a firm grasp of his erection. You stroke him a couple of times through his jeans, your lips hovering over his. You watch his expressions, the way his eyes cross, and his lids flutter, his vision blurred by the shockwaves your touch is sending throughout his body.    "Y-Yeah?" Jisung stammers, a reply that makes you both laugh, briefly breaking the intensity of the passion between you. How can you still have this effect on him? Jisung melts under your heat, and he always will.    “Take your dick out, I need to spell it out for you?”    You grant him a bit more space, allowing him to lift his hips and deftly slide out of his jeans. His brain finally clears the fog of desire, and he's acutely aware of how badly he craves to be with you at this moment. 

"Sorry," he stammers, "I'm like...star-struck or something." You straddle him once more, your thumb gently grazing his lower lip, the delicate almond-shaped acrylic nail tracing along his upper teeth. You observe the transformation in his expression as he shifts from awe to sheer desperation, all while you slowly lower yourself onto his throbbing anticipation. 

“Hmm,” You throw your head back with a blissful sigh of contentment, adjusting to his size. And Jisung can hardly believe it; he’s actually going to marry you and keep you in his life forever. He gets to feel this forever.   

The thought is making him impossibly hard as hips rock into you, emptying out those moans he’s grown to love so much. 

  “Jisung, you feel so good right now, baby,” you purr into his ear, his nails digging into your thighs to get a firmer grip as you ride him, writhing, whining hips giving him chills as you engulf him from every angle. 

“Goddamn,” He moans. “You do too.” 

When Jisung vocalizes during sex, it comes from some deep, carnal place that drives you absolutely mad. And then, he finds his second wind, snaking one arm around your waist, the other supporting his weight on the couch as he starts plunging into your pussy. You're losing composure, your choppy moans matching the tempo of his thrusts as your eyes roll back in your head, being fucked dumb over his shoulder.    When he tires, it’s like a perfect pass off, the way you grind against him.  He releases a guttural noise, head back against the futon as he slaps your thigh in encouragement, coaxing you to keep riding him just…like…that.    He looks up at you again, with stars in his eyes.  “I wish you could see yourself right now.”    “I can.” Your arm around his neck, fingers in his hair, you can see yourself in the reflection of the chain of mirrors along the wall behind you both.    “Oh, good,” Jisung says with a half-smile, your cunt still swallowing him up at this languid pace.  “See how pretty you look when you’re being fucked senseless like this?” He watches your face, the way your chest flutters with tiny gasps and your face twitches when you hit that certain spot.    "Yeah, I do," you barely manage to respond.    “Only thing prettier is how you look when you cum.” His praise pushes you further, two fingers sliding between your lips that you welcome, and Jisung closes his eyes, all of his senses overstimulated as he dangerously evades his orgasm, thanks to shutting out the sight of you absolutely wracked with pleasure, bouncing on his cock, with his fingers at the back of your throat.    You can’t speak, your mouth obstructed, so you begin to whine instead, and he presses on your tongue, making you gag over and over again as you unravel on him.  Jisung feels you cumming, he puts both arms around your waist as he pounds into you from below until he pulls you down a final time, his breath hitching as he allows his release to take over, cursing as he empties inside of you.    As your bodies slowly come down from the peak of ecstasy, you stay intertwined, breathless and sated.  The room is filled with a warm, intimate silence, broken only by the occasional soft sigh and the sound of your synchronized heartbeats.    Jisung gazes into your eyes with a tender expression, his fingers softly brushing a strand of hair away from your face.  “I can’t believe I get to spend the rest of my life with you,” he whispers.    You smile warmly in response, leaning in to kiss him sweetly.  “I feel the same way,” you murmur against his lips.  “Forever sounds pretty perfect.”    The two of you lay there for a while longer, basking in the post-coital afterglow and the knowledge that your love has reached a new level of commitment. The future seems brighter and more promising than ever before, filled with endless possibilities now for the careers of you both. 

Eventually, you two gather the strength to get up and clean up the evidence of your passionate encounter. As you help each other get dressed, there's a sense of contentment and serenity in the air.  With one last lingering kiss, you make your way back outside to catch an Uber back to the hotel, likely for a highly-anticipated round two.      What? You two are rockstars.  Did you expect anything less? 

[hyukaslvr]

just like the stars // j. han

<masterlist

summary✮⋆˙ you and jisung met unexpectedly, both of you being idols and needing to get away from stress and your thoughts. so when needed, you had each other, the hood of your car, and the stars beeming down against you two- and your long talks, of course.

genre✮⋆˙ fluff, idol!reader, idol!jisung, friends to lovers, secret friendship and relationship

warnings✮⋆˙ han jisung(yes, he is a warning, gosh)

w.c✮⋆˙ aproxx 1k

a/n: han han han han han. god, i love han. this has been in my drafts for awhile unfinished and i just had to finish it. also, please acknowledge my secret secret reference at the end, thank you love you💋.

han jisung was the light you needed in your life ; his laid back smile, his contagious laughter, his puffy cheeks, his crescent eyes, his soft and loving hands, his small careful gestures- everything about him glowed, shining like broken glass and straight through your pounding heart.

how you met was weirdly addicting, you thought about it almost everytime you snuck out with the boy. it was quiet funny too.

you were trying to escape your thoughts, stealing the keys to your companies car that is lended to your group and you whenever you needed to drive without a team member. you remember the night so vividly, you being stopped at a stop light, not even noticing the car doors were unlocked until the back opened, revealing and bundled up jisung, also trying to escape his thoughts. his apologies immediately rushing out as he thought you were an uber or a taxi driver, yet you let him stay. the two of you knew of each other, never talked before yet it was so easy to talk to him that night, and every night after that.

you drove him around for hours, almost until daylight rose, that’s how you found your special spot. driving around with no clue or direction, finding yourselves on a cliff with the most perfect view of the entire city lights.

you let yourself back into real time, letting yourself stare at the boy beside you. you couldn’t stop staring, even if you wanted to. you were way too distracted with his cute hand gestures as he spoke, letting his body and mind relax as the wind blowed against the two of you. you give him a hum of agreement, letting him know you’re listening to his ranting, but we both know your mind and heart was some place else, blown away by his beautiful structure.

the stars beamed down on him, like bright pixy dust, making him stand out in the dark night. god, you lived for nights like this, especially with him.

the both of you wrapped in your favorite blanket that stays in your car, specifically for nights like this, but you would never dare to tell him. the nights you both escape your dorms, away from your members and companies attentions, letting yourselves talk for hours in the middle of the night on top of the hood ; it was so peaceful, letting yourselves speak your minds to eachother, knowing you both wouldn’t dare mention any of these meet ups or what gets spoken about to anyone, not even chan or your leader.

“i think the song came out great, it isn’t the top song of our comeback- but it definitely made impact,” he finally faced you, his cheeks slightly pink from the cool breeze blowing harder against his skin, staring at you with a smile that almost reached his eyes.

“you did great, ji. but, i think secret secret is still my favorite produced by you, through-” he playfully pushed you, causing a fit of giggles between the both of you; not the both of you, just you, as he’s poor heart couldn’t handle the sound. now, he wishes he put your laugh in a song, it’s better than any song he’s ever heard. his cheeks may have been cold two seconds ago, but they’re flushed and heated now, eventually letting himself laugh with you, a huge smile plastered across his face.

“you’re taking the blanket!” he teases, tugging hard to get more warmth around his prickled arms from goosebumps, caused by mainly from what he calls: your music. you didn’t let go of the blanket though, you simply scooted closer to the boy, letting your side and your head fall onto his, a satisfied smile on your face as he stiffens at your touch and warmth.

“thank you, han,” your hands resting in his lap, snuggling your head deeper into his neck, “you always make things better, nights like this always do,” you continued, not letting him question your blurting. he lets his heart control his arm, letting it droop around your waist and pulling you closer to him. he would use an excuse of being cold right now just to hold you, but he couldn’t let this intimate moment down with his silly cover ups.

his empty hand reached to hold your cold to touch ones, letting his thumb slowly drag across the skin as his hums in agreement, “i like spending nights away with you,” he speaks quietly, closes his eyes slightly tight before opening them to look at you as your head raises a bit to listen to the man more intently.

“and i like you,” you blurt, lost in the look in his eyes, the stars glistening in them, “the stars look pretty tonight,” turning your head away to lose his locked eyes. a hand removes from your nestled ones, softly grabbing your chin and tilts your head back towards him, but you didn’t dare open your squeezed shut eyes.

“y/n, look at me,” he pouted, his heart beating like crazy watching your lashes fluttered open with your lids, almost immediately locking eyes with his shaken ones, “you like me?”

“so if i do? i like the stars too-”

“but you like me?” his face inches closer to yours, a smile enlarged his face, making your breathing hitch while his breathing tickles your lips. the distance being close enough to barley lean and kiss him right there and then.

“like you in what way?” you give him a teasing smile, hiding the fact your whole body was rising in heat and your stomach felt exploding with butterflies, “in a way i want to kiss your stupid smile off your face? maybe-” your remarks cut off in the best way possible, his soft lips locking his yours and you let him kiss you.

your hands left his lap, reaching to hold the face you always wanted to cup in your palms. you let yourself melt in his hold, his hand leaving your chin and wrapping around your waist tighter than ever, pulling your body closer to his if that was even possible.

kissing jisung felt indescribable, his head turning slightly to kiss your plush lips more deeply. you couldn’t put into words how accomplished you felt with yourself, you’d pay your shoulder if you weren’t mushy in his arms. his lips felt and tasted better than you ever thought they would, you imagined it happening but never expected it to be way better than your silly day dreams.

you practically chased for more once his lips pulled away from yours, trying to catch both of your breathings, letting you both stare in a daze at each other. he looked so beautiful in this moment, you wanted to take a picture of his slightly moisturized lips that were once against yours, his mouth slightly ajar as he caught his breath.

“and i like you, in a way i wanted to kiss you,” he finally speaks, his eyes searching around your face, watching your cheeks darken with a soft smile on your lips.

“yeah, i think i like you in that way too,”

“you think?!” he scoffs, rollling his eyes as you giggle, a smile never leaving his face though, turning his head completely away in childlike manner. you use the advantage of your hands still on his warm cheeks and pulled his back down to yours to leave another soft kiss on his lips.

“keep kissing me and i think i won’t be able to stop,” he says, letting his forehead lean against yours once your lips break apart.

“and what if i don’t want you to stop?”

“then you’re asking for it!”

his lips placing across the skin on your face, giggles emerged from your stomach and your chest as he sprayed you in kisses. “i, like, you, so, much,” he speaks between kisses; first on your cold nose, the second on your forehead, the third on your left cheek, the forth on your right, the last one being your lips. you kiss him back with just as much love, wrapping your arms around his neck, letting the noise of the car honking below you and the wind blowing against your ears fade away, as all you can pay attention to is the lips against yours.

han jisung was your light, your love, he was everything you’ve ever wanted, even if you’ll stay a secret. that was okay with you, your secret late night sneak outs made up for the fact you couldn’t look his way in public events.

he was your secret secret, and you were glad to be his.

[honeysung]

stray kids comforting you during a stressful day.

fluff + fem reader insert.

author’s note: if you’re reading this, stray kids are so proud of you. here’s a short and fluffy drabble for today.

OT8 x reader drabble.

18+

ask box and requests are open 💫

~ ✿ ~

BANGCHAN

will stop everything he’s doing when he finds out about how stressed you are.

lots of cuddles! he’s a big spoon.

leaves kisses all over your face :(

“tell me what’s on your mind, sweetheart.”

LEE KNOW

cooks your favorite foods <3

rubs his thumb over your hands to calm you.

reminds you to take breaks and rest. he’ll do as much as he can for you.

“how’s my pretty girl doing?”

CHANGBIN

sits you on his lap while he’s working in the studio. he wants to keep you company at all times.

compliments you! tells you how lucky he is to have you as a partner.

massages you so you can relax.

“i’m here, baby. you’re okay.”

HYUNJIN

keeps a journal and writes sweet messages to show you.

helps you clear your mind. whether that’s taking walks by the beach or you watch romance movies.

wipes your tears for you with his thumbs and cups your face :’)

“you can tell me anything, princess.”

HAN

will talk with you for hours. he wants to know everything about how you’re feeling.

let’s you wear his hoodie, his vanilla scent calms you.

offers to help you with everyday tasks so you’re less stressed.

“you got this, babe.”

FELIX

bakes you sweet treats. brownies, cinnamon rolls, etc!

holds your hands and kisses them to see you smile.

creates a playlist of songs to cheer you up.

“you’re doing so well, honey.”

SEUNGMIN

hums you a song while he’s embracing you. rubs his hand up and down your back softly :(

forehead kisses!

buys you snacks and a heated blanket to make you feel better.

“i’ll always be by your side, my love.”

JEONGIN

surprises you with pretty flowers.

buys you a teddy bear with a voice audio inside, the voice message is him cheering you on and saying he loves you.

asks about your day. from here, he’s always ready to hear you talk.

“everything will be alright, my angel.”

©️ honeysung

[hanjsquokka]

It's Okay To Not Be Okay - [ Han Jisung ]

🐿 SUMMARY : Your boyfriend had a bad day and you give him exactly what he needs

GENRE : established relationship, fluff, angst

PAIRING : han jisung × gn! reader

CONTENT WARNING : none

WORD COUNT : 1K

When Jisung texted saying he wanted to come over, you replied in no time telling him it was okay and that you would be home soon. You did come home a few hours, exhausted from your long day at work, but it all was worth it seeing Jisung's face in your house. He was seated on your couch, eyebrows furrowed as he watched anime on your TV.

You smiled softly, taking off your shoes and surprising him slightly by sitting down next to him with no heads up. His surprise soon disappears and a smile forms on his face. "How was your day?" You didn't answer right away. You were too busy noticing that his smile didn't quite reach his eyes, or the way he hasn't completely smothered you in kisses or wrapped you in a bear hug.

"Jisung, you okay?" You asked quietly, holding onto his hand that he was fidgeting with.

Jisung sighed. He knew there was no way of hiding himself from you. No matter how convincing his attitude could be for everyone else, you just seemed to see right through him. He stopped bouncing his leg, unable to make eye contact with you. "It's been... it's been a rough day." He muttered after a few moments on silence, his thumb starting to graze over your knuckles. There was more than he was letting on, but you decided to not push him.

Over the course of your nearly one year relationship, you found new sides to Jisung that you've never noticed before. His anxiety being one of them. It surprised you at first because he seemed so open with his members. He was very conserved about it in the beginning, refusing any sort of help or acknowledging it when he was with you. Soon you began to deal with it in a way that he was comfortable with — not asking too much and just going at his pace. Slowly he would open up to you piece by piece and you would find a way to bring back the Jisung you loved so dearly from that dark place in his mind.

"You don't have to say anything. We can just... sit here for a while." You told him, giving a comforting smile while opening your arms to him. He moved closer to you, laying his head on your shoulder, a soft sigh escaping his lips. You wrapped your arms around him tightly, pressing a kiss on his temple. "My day was okay. My boss made me work an extra hour though."

"Your boss is mean." He mumbled against your neck.

"I know right! He thinks he can do anything and that I have no right to question him." I pouted. "But at least I got to see you today." Jisung hummed in response. You started to play with his silver hair — a hair color you were absolutely obsessed with on him. "You wanna take a warm shower? I'll order anything you'd like in the mean time and we can cuddle on the couch and watch a nice movie... like Sweet and Sour! My friend said it was nice. Sounds good?"

"Yeah. It sounds really nice." Jisung looked like he wanted to say something else, but he kept quiet, getting off of you.

While he showered in your bathroom, you ordered his favorite food. Once you were done with that, you went to your room to change into pajamas and pick out a pair of clothes for Jisung that he left at your house. You softly knocked on the bathroom door and only after hearing a faint come in did you open the door. Placing his clothes on the counter, you tried to not gawk at him. Jisung was a very beautiful person to look and it was normally very hard to not look him, but now with him dressed in a towel, it made it very difficult.

"Thank you." He gave you a smile. You returned it and went back to your room to give him some space to change into fresh clothes. You sat at the edge of your bed near a bedside table and did some light skincare when he walked into the room and sat next to you. Jisung looked adorable with his wet silver hair and he smelled like you. It was almost enough to completely melt you. "Your hair's so wet." You said, getting a hairdryer and plugging it into a socket and switching it on. You began drying his hair, combing through it with your hands. Once you were done, it was very fluffy and soft. "It looks perfect. You look perfect."

Jisung blushed, wrapping his hand around you and pulling close so he could hide his face. "Stop teasing me."

You laughed. "Okay, I'm sorry baby. You're just so cute. Let’s eat something, yeah?" Jisung nodded. The two of you went back into the living room. Your takeaway was on the dinner table, freshly delivered. "I didn't know what you wanted to eat, so I just ordered some cheesecake for you. If you want something else, I can make something —"

"This is enough." That was the first time that day he spoke in a firmer tone, firm but affectionate. "You're enough. I don't know what I ever did to deserve you...." Jisung swallowed hard. It was clear he was holding back tears. It felt like a stab straight into your heart. Seeing him hurt so much. He silently plead to come closer to you and the second you nodded, he collapsed into your arms. You rubbed his back soothingly as he let out his sobs, quiet but they rang loudly in your ears. "You're the only one... who never pushes me for anything. You're so patient. and I'm just —"

"Don't say anything." You cupped his face, making eye contact with him. "You're amazing, Han Jisung. It's okay to not be okay. We all have bad days. And I'm here to help you through yours, got that? And if what you need is just someone by your side, then that's what I'll be. I never want to hear you say you're not good enough for me because you are. You’re so amazing. You shine brighter than all the stars. you're the brightest star of all. I just wish... I wish you could see yourself the way I see you."

Jisung was quiet for a while and you were scared you overstepped. Before you could apologize, he held onto your hands, squeezing them. "You're the best, you know that?"

"I try."

"I love you, so damn much." He kissed you softly.

"I love you too baby."

"Now can we eat cheesecake?"

AUTHOR'S NOTE : soft jisung melts my heart 🥺 he's so amazing, he deserves the whole world. also sweet and sour is my new comfort movie, you should go check it out <3

©hanjsquokka | copying, translating or republishing my work is strictly prohibited

[felixknow]

[therhythmafterthesummer]

[00:08] (M) ~Han Jisung

Pairing: BestFriend!Jisung x Reader Themes: Suggestive | Fluff | Best Friends to Lovers Warnings: heavy making out, groping, mentions of drinking/alcohol Word Count: ~1k | AO3 Summary: When you agreed to come to this party, you would’ve never imagined you’d end up making out with your best friend, but you were certainly not going to complain. Not when you’d wanted this for the longest time.

Author’s Note: another silly little warm up, keeping the b2l theme :^). Jisung’s blond hair and pretty face are too much for me to handle. i had to cope somehow.

Due to all the abovementioned warnings, this story is intended for an adult audience only. Minors please do not interact.

Disclaimer: the story represented in this work does not represent Stray Kids in any way; anything described in this story and all actions performed by the characters are purely fictional, this was created just for good fun.

The wall behind your back was vibrating slightly with the loud music that was playing inside the house, but it was hard to register when you also had a very firm, warm human body pressed against you.

Your friends decided to throw a last minute party to celebrate the end of your fourth year at university, and at first you had declined the invitation because you weren’t really a party person. You’d go, usually, just to spend some time with your friends, maybe drink a little, but most of the time the noise was too much, the amount of people overwhelmed you, and the smell of smoke made you nauseous.

However, your best friend, Jisung, convinced you to go anyway using nothing but an adorable pout and a ‘pretty please come with me. I’ll get bored without you’, and you ended up agreeing after making him promise that he’d give you a lift at any given moment if you wanted to leave.

When you agreed, you never expected to end up here, pressed up against the concrete wall, hidden behind the small shed in the backyard, with your best friend’s tongue inside your mouth. You honestly weren’t even sure how it happened, maybe it was the time of day, or the couple of beers you’d had, lowering your inhibitions enough to feel the tension that had built between your friend and you while you talked about everything and nothing in this relatively private space.

Jisung kissed you like a starved man, and honestly you weren’t exactly holding back either. His hands held your waist tightly, keeping you firmly in place, while you tugged on his hair, relishing every groan and sigh and grunt that came out of his lips, mingling with the sounds of your wet kiss. Every single one of his movements had you feeling tingly, had tiny sparks of excitement coursing up and down your spine, fueling the fire burning in the pit of your stomach.

You met Jisung in your first year at uni, and your friendship somehow managed to withstand the test of time. He was one of the people you trusted most in this world, he was always kind, funny, attentive, and even if he was a bit stubborn as well, you ended up developing the biggest crush you’d ever had in your life. It also didn’t help that he was hot as fuck, especially these days with his recently died blonde hair, his incredibly strong arms and chest, and his adorable round cheeks.

At first you tried to ignore your crush, to carry on with your life as normal, tried to go on dates, but no one really stuck around, so a year ago you stopped looking for someone else altogether, resigning yourself to simply crushing on your best friend, and doing nothing about it because you were too much of a coward.

Jisung had been single for a couple of years, and he also seemed to stop going on dates around the same time you did. At the time you couldn’t quite understand why he wasn’t out there, you knew there’d be lines and lines of people ready to date him as soon as he sent a quick text. Now, as his hand slid from your waist to grope your ass and his teeth sunk on your bottom lip, you finally understood why.

“Jisung–” You tried to speak, but it was hard to when you just wanted to keep your lips on his, to feel his tongue play with your own, to feel his chest against yours.

“Mm?” Jisung seemed to be in the same predicament, and he finally let go of your ass to cup your cheeks instead, lightly stroking your skin with his thumbs as he kept pressing pecks on your lips.

“Wanna… Wanna go home”.

Jisung pulled back from you with slightly wide eyes. His cheeks were flushed, his lips were kiss-bitten, his gaze flickered from one of your eyes to the other, and you had to resist the urge to go back to devouring his mouth again. Taking a step back, he let go of your face. “Oh…”

That crestfallen look in his eyes let you know he had completely misunderstood your words, so you took a hold of his hoodie stepping into his space. “Why are you looking at me like that? I wanna go home… With you”.

“Oh?” Jisung looked genuinely surprised, and you would’ve laughed at the absurdity of it all had you not been burning up from the inside out. “You do?”

“Are you doubting it? We just spent an eternity making out against this wall, Han Jisung”, you chuckled, looping your arms around his neck to pull him close, and his arms wrapped around your waist to pull you even closer with a sheepish smile on his face.

“I mean… I’d convinced myself this would never happen so I’m… You know…”

You blinked, confused. “Why wouldn’t it happen?”

Jisung chuckled, pressing his hands flat on the small of your back. “Have you seen yourself? You could have anyone you wanted. Up until thirty minutes ago I thought you saw me as a friend. Thought my feelings were one-sided”.

“Have you seen yourself?” You brought one of your hands to his face, squeezing his cheeks, making him pout. “It’s honestly unfair how hot you are”.

Jisung’s flush seemed to deepen, and you couldn’t help but smile as he stumbled over his words. “That’s not–I mean–But you–”

“Jisung”, you squished his cheeks a bit harder, stopping his ramble on the spot. “We can fight over who’s hotter later. If you don’t take me home and fuck me, I will fuck you against this wall right now”.

Jisung went quiet for a moment, until he finally detached himself from you, taking your hand in his and tugging you along the backyard, and back into the house. Everyone was already wasted inside, but the party was still pretty much alive, the music was incredibly loud, people were dancing, talking–more like screaming–and playing games.

You and Jisung ignored all of it, making your way towards the front door, to finally step outside and walk all the way to Jisung’s car. It was taking so long, too long for your liking. You wanted to have his lips on you again, so you tugged on his hand to get him to stop moving, crashing into him, kissing him deeply, hungrily, and the desperate sounds that came out of his mouth as he held the back of your head and reciprocated your kiss certainly made it all worth it.

“Just for the record…” Jisung mumbled against your lips between kisses, hugging your waist tightly and walking backwards towards his car with you in his arms. “I would’ve one hundred percent let you fuck me against that wall, but your bed sounds way more appealing”.

You simply chuckled, sucking on his bottom lip, making him giggle. “I’ll keep that in mind, then”.

You both stopped walking as soon as you found yourselves by Jisung’s car. With your hands on his chest you pushed him against the door, sneaking your tongue inside his mouth to glide against his. Gripping your ass, Jisung held you against him, pulling you impossibly closer to him as one of his legs slotted between yours, his thigh adding much needed friction against your core, making you whine.

Jisung’s lips were so soft, so swollen from all the biting and nibbling you’d been doing, better than you could’ve ever imagined they’d feel like against your own, better than you could’ve ever imagined they’d taste like. You could feel him hard against your stomach, undeniable proof that you weren’t just making this all up in your head, he really wanted you just as much as you wanted him, and the feeling had your head spinning a bit.

“C’mon”, with one more squeeze to your buttcheek, and a final, loud kiss on your lips, Jisung got you off of him, digging into his pocket for his car keys to unlock the doors, chuckling once he saw the pout on your face. “Let’s go before I bust a nut right here, right now”.

“How romantic”, you couldn’t help but laugh, rounding the car and opening the passenger door to finally climb inside.

As soon as the car was on and your safety belts were secured in place, Jisung started to drive, taking the road that you knew would lead to your home the fastest. It was silent for a while. It wasn’t uncomfortable by any means, but there was certainly something lingering in the space. You could almost feel your own neediness radiate off of you, just like you could feel Jisung’s, and it had you vibrating with excitement right where you sat.

Suddenly, you felt warmth envelop your hand, and when your gaze shifted from the road to your lap, you saw Jisung’s fingers link with yours, holding your hand, softly caressing your knuckles with his thumb. 

“So… What would you like for breakfast tomorrow? Waffles? Pancakes?” Jisung’s eyes never left the road. There was a tiny smile on his lips, coupled with the faintest blush on his cheeks, the sight had your heart fluttering in your chest.

“Waffles. With maple syrup and butter”, you replied simply, holding his hand tighter.

“With maple syrup and butter”, Jisung repeated, glancing at you for a second before returning his eyes to the road.

It didn’t matter, really. You would’ve had anything for breakfast, as long as you had Jisung with you there the next morning. Maybe even the one after that, too… And the one after that, and the one after that, and the one after that…

Tagging: @raspbinniecreme @oiminho @dundullresident @honey-lemon-goose @lavenderxkies @biribarabiribbaem @meowmeowhoon @dearalice @alexis-reads-fics @xcookiemonsteer @knowleeknow @chanlovesme @liminaldaydream @sstarryreads @svngiem @notastraykid If you want to be removed from the list (or if i tagged you incorrectly) just PM me. If you want to be added fill in this form~

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Constructive feedback (or even keysmashes, really) is always welcome :) feel free to leave your comments in the caption/tags when you reblog, or by sending me an ask !

[stayteezdreams]

My Kind of Fun: Part One

Plot: Parties aren't really your thing, so when you sneak off to find some peace and quiet, you run into someone who feels the same.

-Part Two-

Pairing: Han Jisung x Gn!Reader

-Meet Cute Series-

Warnings: Mentions of alcohol, and a drunk guy (the reader is not mentioned as drinking anything)

Words: ~2.1k

Your fake laugh spilled from your mouth for the hundredth time, as the drunk guy in front of you told a story you were certain was fake.

His glazed eyes were barely focused on you as he slurred his words, and you looked round the room desperately for your friend. You had begun to feel overwhelmed with your surroundings a while ago, but told yourself to stay. But the longer you did, the more you regretted it.

Excusing yourself, you left the drunk man to himself as you looked for somewhere quiet to escape too, while also keeping an eye out for your friend.

'Why did I let her convince me to come?' you asked yourself as you dodged a stumbling drunk girl.

Seeing your friend nowhere in sight, you worried she may have left with someone, forgetting your existence for the night. You sighed as your eyes landed on the doors to what you assumed was a balcony.

Peaking out the glass window, you saw no one, and felt a wave of relief. Pushing open the door, you slid out and let out a sigh as the cool night air washed over you.

Walking to the balcony ledge, your eyes cast over the city. You felt instantly more at ease away from the loud music, alcohol and strangers. You laid your head down on your arm for a second as you took in a breath.

Standing up straight again, you turned to lean against the railing, but your eyes instantly caught on the young man on the other side of the balcony.

Your heart jolted as you jumped, letting out a gasp of surprise.

His eyes widened in surprise as he lifted his hands, "Sorry!" he yelled in a soft voice.

You let out a breath as you chuckled, clearly still in shock.

"I wasn't sure if I should have announced my presence when you came out or not" He mumbled in a somewhat awkward tone, but you could see an amused smile on his face.

You lifted your hand "It's okay, I'm sorry I didn't realize someone was out here."

Han's smile relaxed a bit as you chuckled. When he saw you come out onto the balcony his heart dropped. He was afraid you were some drunk stranger who was gonna bother him.

But then he recognized you, having seen you earlier. He remembered thinking you looked as uncomfortable as he felt.

When you let out a sigh and wandered to the balcony, he could tell you weren't drunk. And from the way you were acting he thought maybe you were tying to escape just like he had.

Straightening up a bit, you placed your hands behind your back, feeling a bit awkward. You smiled at Han, and he felt his heart jolt.

"Do you want me to leave? You were here first, I can find somewhere else to go." You offered politely, uncertain of what to do.

Han stood up a bit straighter and shook his head quickly "No no, you don't have to do that." He smiled softly at you "Are you trying to escape the party?"

You felt an odd sense of relief wash over you at this comment before you chuckled and nodded "Yeah, I didn't really want to come."

Han let out a soft laugh "Yeah me neither. Well-" he interrupted himself "I did want to come, but I didn't want to be here this long."

"Did your friend disappear on you too?" You asked with a knowing tone as you walked a bit closer to him.

He nodded smiling, feeling relieved you were just like him in this moment.

"I'm Y/n." You introduced yourself, your tone obviously shy.

Han felt his heart skip a beat as you smiled at him again "I'm Jisung, most of my friends call me Han though."

"It's nice to meet you." You said with a soft bow of your head as your smile widened a bit.

Han's heart seemed to do another flip, and he felt an urge to know more about you, to know everything about you.

He slowly took steps towards the balcony, and you followed. Leaning against the railing together, though you were still a few feet away from each other.

After a brief moment of silence Han cleared his throat lightly "So if you didn't want to come to the party, why did you?" He asked softly, genuinely curious.

You smiled and looked down at your hands, wondering how honest you should be. Glancing over at him, you were almost taken aback by the soft, patient gaze as he looked at you. Something told you he'd understand you.

"Uhh, I'm pretty introverted, I don't have a lot of friends and I avoid crowded places." You gave him a brief look, and saw him nod softly, almost as if he felt the same, so you continued "I want to be better at being social, so-" you sighed "When my friend told me about this party and asked me to come, I said yes, much to their surprise" You chuckled "But, my social battery ran out quite a while ago." You admitted with a slightly disappointed tone.

He nodded and let out a breath "I'm the same, pretty much."

You met his eyes and he smiled softly "Yeah?"

He nodded, and a wave of understanding and comfort washed over you. Han felt it too as he got lost in staring at you for a moment.

The growing tension between you was broken when you felt your phone vibrate.

Han quickly looked away from you, noting how his heart seemed to be in a constant state of flutter around you.

Reading your text, you felt your stomach twist a bit as you resisted the urge to laugh.

'I hope you got home okay! Don't worry about me, I'm safe ;) '

You shook your head and Han looked at you curiously "Everything okay?"

You sighed softly and nodded as you put your phone away. "Apparently I waited around for nothing. My friend thought I had already gone home so she already left too."

Han rose his brow and opened his mouth in awe "They didn't even check first?"

You shook your head "I'm not really surprised, as I usually would have left by now."

"So what are you gonna do now?" he asked casually, wondering if you were going to leave now.

Part of you wanted to stay and talk to him more, but you dreaded hanging around the party any longer.

You hummed quietly as you looked over the balcony edge out at the city. "I suppose since they left, I should too."

Han would be lying if he said he didn't feel a wave of disappointment wash over him, but he didn't blame you at all for wanting to leave. Before you came out, he was a few moments away from leaving himself.

He nodded in understanding as you turned around, "It was nice to meet you Jisung"

"You too" He smiled, wondering if it would be too forward to ask for your number.

As you walked towards the doors, Han found himself calling out "Wait!"

You turned and looked back at him and you saw him hesitate.

"Uh, I- do you want to share an Uber or something? I think I'm ready to leave too."

You smiled at him "I was actually gonna walk home"

"Walk!?"

"Yeah, I live close by, I walked here, sooo" You chuckled.

Han looked around "But it's the middle of the night! Since your friend left it's too dangerous to walk alone isn't it?"

You felt touched at his concern for you, and giggled lightly, unaware of the somersaults you made Han's heart do when you did.

Han walked over to you "Let me-" he stopped himself "Can I walk you home? Or at least most of the way? It doesn't seem right to let you walk alone."

Your heart was pounding in your chest, as your ears burned hot. He really was a nice guy wasn't he?

"What about your friend?"

He shrugged, "I seriously doubt they'd notice I left."

"Some great friends we have huh?" You asked with a chuckle, making him laugh. After a second of thought, you nodded "Okay, if you really want to, that would be nice."

He smiled at you and nodded "It would certainly make me feel better."

You smiled and he cleared his throat as he walked to the door, pulling it open for you.

As you walked down the dark road towards your house, silence hung between the two of you for only a moment before Han started asking you questions.

Had you always lived here? Did you go to college? What did you study? What are your hobbies?

Your conversation went back and forth as you learned about each other, and in turn found that you got along great, like really great.

So when you turned down your street, you hesitated, you felt disappointed that it was going to end.

You stopped and Han looked over at you "I live just up here" You pointed and you saw Han's face fall with realization.

"Oh" He said softly before he looked around your surroundings.

Han actually felt panicked, at the idea of the night ending. He wanted to keep talking to you forever.

"What- I- do you-" he stumbled over his word before he finally turned and looked at you again with a hopeful smile "Are you hungry?"

You felt a bit surprise at the sudden question, but knew where it was leading.

Your stomach fluttered and you smiled brightly, nodding "I could eat."

Han's smile widened as he scratched the back of his head "I know a place you can get some pretty good ramyeon near here."

You nodded fervently "I know it too."

As you turned and started heading away from your house, both you and Han buzzed with excitement and a childish giddiness that you both wondered if the other felt too.

Swinging back and forth slowly on the swing as you shoved ramyeon into your mouth you almost laughed.

You didn't expect your night to end with you and a handsome boy you just met, in an empty playground in the middle of the night eating noodles.

As a small scoff escaped you, Han looked over at you in amusement and curiosity.

"What?" He asked with a mouth full of noodles.

You swallowed your food and shook your head "This is just so different then how my night started."

Han chuckled and nodded, feeling the same.

"But honestly, this is more fun to me than any party."

Han laughed out loud now "Cheers to that." He said in an exaggerate tone as he rose his bowl of noodles.

Laughing, you cheers yours against his as you both chuckled. Your eyes met and you both felt yourselves freeze for a moment as tension seem to rise.

At the same time, you both let out soft and awkward giggles before you went back to eating your ramyeon. Casual silence hung between you for a moment before he spoke.

"I like this too." his voice was just above a whisper, but you heard him clearly. You looked over at him just as he looked at you "Would you- would you want to do it again?"

Your heart jumped at his question, and you felt a grin pulling at your lips.

You nodded "I would."

You saw Han repress a smile as he looked down at his food, mixing it a bit aggressively as he nodded, failing to repress his smile anymore "Me too."

You looked back down at your food, and hoped your face wasn't noticeably flushed as you felt butterflies rampage in your stomach.

"Is tomorrow too soon?" He asked suddenly and you looked up a bit surprised, only to see him staring at you with round, excited eyes.

Unable to help it, a laugh bubbled out of you, making him chuckle nervously as he became aware of his own eagerness.

But he felt relieved when you stifled your giggles and shook your head "No, I don't think it's too soon at all."

"Good" he laughed softly as he locked his eyes with yours.

Your eyes stayed locked as you smiled softly at each other, both of you knowing you were feeling the same thing. The same pull towards each other that made you not want to separate.

But even when you had to separate after Han walked you back home, you had the knowledge and excitement that you would see him again soon.

xx

-Part Two-

Taglist: @bubblesreplies, @halesandy, @why-am-i-sad, @jaeheekangslover, @sourmooonlight, @seungminsdreamwife, @thesunsfullmoon

[slytherinshua]

CANT SLEEP WITHOUT YOU

genre. fluff. fake texts. warnings. none. pairing. han x reader. wc. 3 texts. request. requested by @amara-mars: hihi nana cannnnnn i get a han orrrr hyunjin or channie cute text blurb? like where he’s late to come home and yn is so sleepy but refuses to sleep alone🫶🏽🫶🏽 a/n. ty for requesting amara love <33 it's a lil short but i hope you enjoy!! divider by @/plutism

↳ skz taglist: @kangtaehyunzzz,, @yeonjuns-redhair,, @ddeonudepressions,, @justhyunhoer,, @skz-minchan-enthusiast,, @weird-bookworm,, @edensgardenn,, @cyberpunksunwoo

[jisungsdaydreamer]

Love Playlist #1: HOME (Han)

«GENERAL M.LIST» · «NAVIGATION» · «TALK TO ME» 

"For a really smart person, Jisung can be so dumb sometimes."

Pairing: Han x Fem!reader Genre: college au, friends to lovers, roommates to lovers, fluff, mutual pining Warnings: mild swearing Word Count: 7k

P.S. ♡ If you like my work, please consider giving me feedback in the form of reblogs, comments, and asks! ♡

You have three strict rules that you must follow. One, no going out after eleven. Two, never leave the house without your cell phone. And three, never, ever, fall in love with Han Jisung.

Unfortunately, you’ve broken that third rule already. In fact, you’re still breaking it, charring it to a crisp, and throwing it out like the trash you both begrudgingly take turns with. But how can you not? Because when it comes to your doe-eyed best friend who is serenely sitting in front of you, the whole rulebook is torn up. 

Jisung quietly flips through his growing stack of manga, blissfully unaware of the way your heart accelerates whenever he reads a particularly entertaining segment and his eyes light up in amusement.You should remind him to stay on track, but you can’t bear to stop him because of how cute he looks, his legs unconsciously swinging under the table and his fifth banana lollipop of the day shoved into his mouth. 

You’re both sitting together in the library at your special table beside the big window, the place that is always secluded no matter what, as if some higher power knows to keep it aside for you and Jisung for whenever you desire. Both of you are supposed to be studying for your finals, the objectively worst part of the entire year. You’re both seniors, so the slew of exams coming up should be a piece of cake for you, except both of you have grad school next year— you’ll be starting on your PhD, while Jisung, a computer engineering major, will be working towards a master’s degree— so you still have to worry about all of your final grades.

“I hate this.” Jisung looks up from the book in his hands, closing it shut. “I wish I didn’t have to do this.”

“It’s almost over. Then we’ll finally graduate and get to enjoy our summer,” you reply. “And then our lives begin.”

And the elation building in your chest is real, because although you have a tough couple of days ahead of you, the end of this year will be a testament to everything you have accomplished. You have your summer mapped out already; you’re going to be completing groundbreaking cancer research at an esteemed biologist’s lab, days filled with productivity along with exciting nights exploring adulthood and freedom with your friends. Even though you’ll still have school, you’ll only have to be doing what you’re passionate about, leaving behind the mandatory literature and calculus courses that brought you so many tears over the duration of college. 

“Not for me.” Jisung sighs, leaning back in his chair and staring aimlessly at the ceiling. “It’ll never end.”

Lately, Jisung has become increasingly stressed about graduation. He doesn’t come from a wealthy background, with his mother being a grocery store cashier and his father out of the picture. You’re aware he’s under immense pressure to do well in school and then get a good job that will take care of both him and his mother, when she’s unable to provide for herself. Worst of all, Jisung had to ditch his dream of becoming a musician and instead focus on something more practical, which ended up being a profession in computers. Of course, like anything else he puts his effort into, Jisung excels in computer engineering, and he’s come to terms with giving up his passion, but you know it doesn’t hurt any less.

“Do you want to talk about it?” You ask softly, reaching for his hand. He accepts it, but he turns his head to gaze at the street beyond the window.

“It’s okay.”

You don’t press any further, because you know that it will just break him down, and neither of you can afford that right now at such a crucial time. Instead, you resolve to brighten his mood, like he does with you anytime you’re down. “Let’s just hope we don’t get food poisoning tomorrow.”

Your attempt works, because Jisung meets your eyes, a smile permeating his solemn expression and before widening into a full grin, at the memory of the time you both first met. Remembrance comes like the summer breeze you look so forward to, washing over you both like a tidal wave. And just like that, it’s freshman year and you’re standing at the bus stop near your old dormitory building. 

You anxiously devoured the notebook pages in your hands, alternating between cramming the tiny text and scanning the road for the bus that was supposed to be here ten minutes ago. Your stomach ached from the food poisoning you contracted earlier that morning, an unwelcome byproduct of the dubious cauliflower and tuna tacos served at the dining hall the night before.

This was horrible timing too, especially because you had your first test of the academic year that day. When you should have been bent over your statistics notes, you were cooped up in the bathroom for the previous few hours, clutching the toilet bowl as you watched the clock above you tick menacingly. 

You bounced on your toes anxiously, before a strange, squeaking sound met your ears. You whirled around to see a boy approaching you while struggling to pull a large, bulging suitcase along with him. He finally succeeded, collapsing onto the bus stop bench while coughing and wheezing up a storm that rivaled the ominous clouds in the sky. You reached into the side pocket of your backpack, pulling out your unopened plastic water bottle and handing it over to him.

He looked at your offering hand in surprise, before gratefully accepting. He tipped his head back and closed his eyes while he gulped down the cool water. You watched him finish the entire bottle with a dizzying speed and then recycle it in the bin next to the bus stop. The boy was lanky, sporting an oversized Pokémon t-shirt and battered sneakers, and overdue for a haircut, the locks flopping over his sweaty forehead.

“Thank you so much.” He said.

“Of course. What’s in the suitcase?” 

The boy fondly ran a hand over the worn-out seams of the object of your curiosity. “I promised my roommate that I would give him all of my old books for his class project. I have no idea why he wants them, but then again, art students are weird.”

He looked up at you not even a second later, alarm in his eyes. “Unless you’re an art student! In that case, I didn’t mean what I said.”

You giggled, shaking your head. “No, I’m a biology major. And yes, I agree.”

He beamed. “I’m Han Jisung. First year, computer engineering. Anime and cheesecake lover. Spicy food hater.”

“Y/N. I’m a freshman, too, and I also love anime and cheesecake. Chocolate cheesecake, to be specific. And I can’t stand spicy food.”

“Chocolate supremacy!” Jisung gasped, clamping a palm over his mouth. “This is meant to be.”

You let out a hearty laugh at his theatrics. “Exactly.”

At that moment, the bus finally arrived, rolling to a stop next to you both. You helped Jisung push his suitcase full of storybooks up the steps of the bus and into the aisle. You sat on one of the seats in the back, and Jisung followed suit, plopping down right next to you. As he did, you noticed him wince, clutching his stomach. Concern bloomed in you for this precious stranger that you just met. 

“Are you okay?”

He clutches his stomach once more, smiling embarrassedly. “I got food poisoning. I should have known better than to trust the dining hall food.”

You pause, as the ironic delight of the situation sets in, allowing the pain to fade away and leaving you to wonder about the odds of meeting Jisung. “No way! Me too!”

Jisung’s eyes widen in surprise. “That’s destiny. Mutual food poisoning. Now we definitely have to be friends.”

Later, after you had exchanged numbers and plenty of laughs, parting ways at your respective bus stops, you would meet again at the university hospital. Both of you had contracted a salmonella infection.

Unbeknownst to you and Jisung, that delayed bus and salmonella would determine the trajectory of the rest of your lives. Over time, you both emerged from the shackles of a hesitant acquaintance to the kind of bond that never breaks, even with time, distance, or the grievances of being young. You witnessed each other grow up, fall in love and out of love, and get drunk on piña coladas at the bar next to the college gym you both pretended to go to regularly. 

Somewhere along the way, after Loser Boyfriend Number Three, as Jisung tried to cheer you up with his horrible jokes and the burned brownies that he nuked in the residence hall kitchen microwave, you realized that you were wasting your time on people who weren’t worth it. Because the only person who was worth it was the one who had been by your side all the time. Jisung. 

Betrayed by your treacherous heart, you began to see Jisung— your person, your study buddy, your fake fiancé when you both were trying to score free dessert with a restaurant proposal— as more than just a friend. In fear of your feelings potentially ruining your friendship, something more dear to you than any form of romance, as you so believed they would, you swore to never speak to Jisung of it. But you couldn’t lie to yourself anymore about the worst. You fell in love with your best friend. 

“What did the farmer say after he lost his tractor?”

“I have no idea, Jisung.”

“‘Hey, where’s my tractor?’ Get it?” Jisung bursts out laughing, slapping his thigh. He doubles over, his whole body shaking with laughter at the unimpressed look on your face, which makes everything funnier for him.

“That doesn’t even make sense!” You exclaim, trying to push him. Jisung just keeps giggling, dodging you masterfully.

You both have given up on your library study session, resolving to take a break at your favorite coffee shop and meet up with the rest of your friends in your circle. The setting sun has streaked the blue sky with its golden rays and puffy pink clouds, enveloping the entire campus in a hazy glow. It’s a pleasant May evening, with the scent of your college’s famed peonies along with the excitement of Spring lingering in the air. The street lights that line the sidewalk are already turned on, but not many people are outside enjoying the weather, except for a few students playing a game of Frisbee on the athletic field. Everyone else is locked away in their rooms or the library, grinding for their upcoming exams.

“Well, I have a better one anyway.” Jisung states, clearing his throat dramatically. 

You roll your eyes as you near your destination, an unassuming red-brick building tucked away in a larger complex of stores. Purple morningstar blossoms border the door of the small shop in clumps of dainty vines, no doubt the namesake of Morningstar Coffee House. Fairy lights are strung around the glass block windows, which offer a glimpse of the inviting warmth inside. 

“Let’s hear it.”

Jisung jogs ahead of you and opens the door for you, gallantly gesturing for you to go first. “What did Y/N say to Jisung when they went to the coffee shop together?”

The comforting smell of pastries and dark roast coffee engulfs you as you step into Morningstar. The strung lanterns and groovy jazz music playing in the background welcome you like a hug from a long-distance friend. You can’t believe it’s been so long since you’ve gone anywhere other than the library, the lecture halls, or the tiny apartment you and Jisung share. 

“I don’t know.” You humor Jisung, still playing along and waiting for his ridiculous punchline.

He smirks at you. “I love you a latte!”

You feign disgust, but secretly, you are elated because of how genuinely touching his words are to you. Jisung hugs you like a baby panda, trying to get you to applaud him for his clever joke, as Jisung is naturally a very physically affectionate person, always wanting to snuggle up to the people around him. But your heart can’t help but jump a little every time you feel his arms snug around you. 

“Well, I love you a latte more, Hannie,” you respond nonchalantly, but you mean it. You do love Jisung for everything that he is, even the cringeworthy SoundCloud rapper phase that dominated his sophomore year. 

“You guys are weird,” your friend Seungmin says from behind the counter, where he’s busy working as the barista, while his co-worker, Soobin, a timid Psychology student, clumsily handles orders at the cash register. Seungmin’s parents own Morningstar, and he plans to take over it next year. 

Jisung sticks his tongue out at Seungmin in defiance, before linking arms with you and dragging you to the back, where the rest of your friends are seated. There is Chan, or more famously known as Chris among his many admirers across his campus, clad in his signature black jacket. Besides him, the turquoise-haired baby of your group, Jeongin, and then Hyunjin, who as usual, is lost in his sketchbook. 

“Hey guys. What are you up to?” You slide in next to Hyunjin, trying to peek at what he’s drawing. You catch a glimpse of a very pretty girl you vaguely recognize from around campus, before he protectively snaps his journal closed, narrowing his eyes at you.

“Eyes on your coffee, Y/N,” Hyunjin says, handing you the mug that they ordered for you ahead of time. Magically, it’s still hot.

You accept the coffee and drink it, letting the rich liquid warm your insides as you swallow it gratefully. “Alright, alright.”

Jisung tries to steal a bite of Jeongin’s apple danish, earning him a swat on his wandering palms. Chan looks over at you with a grin. “We’re just listening to Jeongin rant about his crush.”

Jeongin groans before continuing. “And I keep asking her out, but every time, she rejects me, bro! What am I supposed to do? Give up?"

“Yes,” Hyunjin says in his signature straightforward manner, prompting everyone but Jeongin to snicker.

“Whatever. I'll figure out a way.” Jeongin sits back in his seat, resorting to aggressively typing on his keyboard to deal with his frustration.

You look around your little corner in the shop, which is filled with textbooks and miscellaneous notebook sheets. “Where are the others?”

“Minho is studying with his girlfriend, and Changbin and Felix are apparently also working, but they’re probably gaming instead.”

Hyunjin bites down on the edge of his straw, glancing between you and Jisung thoughtfully. “Speaking of girlfriend, when are you both going to get together?”

You freeze up in your seat, tensing like you always do whenever someone jokes about your relationship with Jisung, but he’s unfazed, shooting Hyunjin a mischievous smile. “When you tell us about that girl you’re obsessed with.”

Hyunjin immediately forgets about teasing you, glaring at Jisung contempfully. “Shut up, Han. You don’t know anything.”

“Guys, let’s calm down,” you say while patting Hyunjin’s back, happy for the distraction but still cautious about him and Jisung. While those two love each other very much now, they used to fight like crazy when they roomed together in freshman year, and no one needs a repeat of bad history right now.

Jisung catches your eye, and although he doesn’t smile at you, you can see the appreciation in his eyes. You nod slightly at him, before getting out your own computer. Words do not have to be exchanged between you two for you to understand each other.

You all settle into a comfortable silence as you finish your coffee and resume studying, only looking up occasionally to ask each other questions about the material or an assignment. Soon, the evening begins to fade away, and you start packing up your belongings before closing time.

“Hey, Y/N! Can you come over here for a second?” Seungmin calls out, capturing your attention.

You put down your backpack and walk over to the counter, where he’s washing his blender. “Yes?”

“So what’s going on with you and Jisung?” Before you can interrupt him and deny anything, Seungmin wipes his hands and gives you a meaningful look. “I know you have feelings for him.”

You feel your face heat up, and you avoid his piercing eyes. “How would you know?”

“Look, it doesn’t take a genius to figure it out. From the way you look at him, it’s a marvel how he hasn’t figured it out yet. For a really smart person, Jisung can be so dumb sometimes.”

You exhale, seeing no point in lying anymore. Besides, it feels good to get it off of your chest. “Well, why are you bringing this up anyway?”

Seungmin sets down his utensil caddy and rests his elbows on the edge of the sink. “Soobin likes you and asked me if you’re single. But, you know, I wasn’t sure if you are available. Emotionally, I mean.”

You glance over at Soobin, observing him counting all of the day’s revenue. The blonde cashier catches your eye, flashing you a shy smile before quickly looking away, turning a shade of tomato red. He’s handsome, good-hearted, and not to mention, very tall. Just your type. But he’s no Jisung.

“It’s been a while since I’ve dated anyone.” And this is true— over a year, to be precise. “I guess, I’m still hung up over Jisung.”

“Do you plan on making a move?”

“No way. I’m just going to wait for the feelings to dissipate. I would never risk our friendship like that,” you mumble.

“You could get to know Soobin, maybe he’ll help you move on,” Seungmin suggests, crossing his arms.

You consider your options before piping up. Jisung had gotten pretty serious with his last girlfriend by the end of your junior year, but he broke up with her a month later, telling you that she just wasn’t the one for him. He hasn’t dated anyone since, claiming that it’s not the right time. But for you, it is, and you realize that you can’t keep waiting for him.

“Maybe I will,” you say, toying with your jacket zipper.

Seungmin tips his head towards Soobin, but before you move, he leans in closer to you. “But personally, I think you should just tell Jisung. If he’s really your best friend, your friendship will stay the same no matter what.”

You nod. “Yeah, okay.”

You know Seungmin is right, but the truth is, it’s not just about losing your friendship with Jisung. Regardless of whether he reciprocates your feelings or not, you know that he would never walk away from you. It’s truly you who you are concerned about. You’re uncertain if you could bear to go back being your normal self around Jisung if you confess and get rejected. You don’t know if your heart could handle it.

You touch Seungmin’s hand in a quiet gratitude and approach Soobin, who immediately notices your presence and accidentally slams the cash register drawer closed, nearly shutting it on his finger. “H-hi Y/N.”

Watching Soobin get endearingly flustered, you can’t help but smile. “Hey Soobin. How are you?”

“I’m good, thank you.” Soobin bites down on his lip, wrapping his arms around himself. He looks so cute in his brown bib apron and converse shoes. “You look really pretty in that dress.”

Your cheeks warm, but you look him directly in his eyes. “That’s so kind of you to say. Actually, I was hoping you'd want to go out on a date sometime? Maybe after finals?”

Although you’re very reserved about your feelings for Jisung, in every other case, you can be quite forward with romance. Soobin’s eyes widen. “Wait, really?”

You laugh, getting out your phone. “Yes, really. What do you say?”

“Yes! I would love to. Could I please get your number?” Soobin stretches out his phone, which is covered in teddy bear stickers. 

You think of Jisung’s phone, which has a clear case and a polaroid of you two at the beach inside. You shake the thought of him away. You type your number into Soobin’s phone, before wishing him good luck on his finals and then rejoining your friend group in the darkening outdoors, which has moved outside the shop while you were talking to Seungmin. As soon as he spies you walking out of the door, Hyunjin forgets his conversation with Jeongin and immediately launches into interrogating you. 

“What were you talking to Soobin about?”

You shrug, trying to play it off, but can’t help the rosy blush that creeps up your neck. “Nothing, really.”

Now the others look interested as well, and Jeongin smirks knowingly at you. “You asked him out, didn’t you?”

Out of the corner of your eye, you think you see Jisung’s smile falter, but you chalk it up to your own imagination and affirm Jeongin’s prediction. “Yes, but it’s pretty casual. So not a big deal.”

Chan and Jeongin both high-five you like seventh grade boys, while Hyunjin just cackles at your sudden agitation. Jisung, however, looks annoyed, a very new color on him. 

“I didn’t know you were interested in Soobin,” he says, shutting Hyunjin up. “Why didn’t you tell me? You always tell me when you like someone.”

You know the answer to his question. But you can’t tell Jisung that the only reason why you asked Soobin on a date out of the blue is because you are in love with him and trying to move on. “Seungmin just told me that he had a crush on me. So I went for it.”

“Yeah, everyone knows Soobin likes you. But you could have told me first before making a move.” Jisung’s tone is slightly harsh, suspicious. You recoil in surprise, because he has never spoken to you like this, unlike the boy you know and love.

“Why are you getting so mad?” You ask him, hurt.

“It’s just that we tell each other everything, and this is pretty big.” Jisung crosses his arms stubbornly. “Unless you didn’t want me to know.”

Your skin prickles with a strange feeling, because while you two have bickered over stupid things in the past, it wasn’t anything serious like the look on Jisung’s face now. “What’s your problem, Jisung? What did I do to you?”

Your voice is raised, and boys instantly sense the tension in the air, stepping in to mediate. Chan, the eldest in the group, places a hand on Jisung’s shoulder, mutely imploring him to stay calm. Hyunjin, however, gets defensive on your behalf. 

“Why should she have to tell you? Calm down,” Hyunjin says, frowning at Jisung.

“It’s okay, Hyunjin. We should get going.” Without waiting for an answer from the others, you grasp Jisung’s hand and pull him with you, while he comes along without saying anything at all.

The walk back to your apartment, which is seven minutes long from campus, is filled with an uneasy silence, a dreadful change from the playfulness earlier in the day. The air is charged, full of everything you both want to say to each other, but nevertheless, you keep your mouth closed. More than anything, you’re confused. 

It’s been a long time since either of you were with anyone romantically, so maybe it is surprising to Jisung that you randomly asked Soobin out. However, you don’t understand his anger, especially because Jisung has always supported you in your dating life, even setting you up sometimes with people he knew. But you don’t think the problem is the fact that it is Soobin either, because Soobin is one of the most beloved people on campus due to his sweet personality. You don’t know what’s wrong, and that’s what bothers you the most.

Neither of you speak even when you reach your neighborhood, a suburban oasis in a big city. When there’s good weather, you and Jisung love to come outside and either take long walks around the block or pack picnics to share on the perpetually green lawn in front of your apartment building. Today, you head straight up to your flat, an indifferent pair of strangers standing in the elevator.

After unlocking the door to your apartment, you finally decide to break the silence, turning to look at Jisung, who trails a few feet behind you. “I’ll be in my room, studying.”

You want him to say something, anything, but he just nods, keeping his eyes trained on the grey hardwood flooring. Sighing, you pad across the apartment and enter your room, shutting the door you always keep open. 

You and Jisung had signed a lease on your place last year, partially because you couldn’t afford off-campus housing on your own, but also because you couldn’t imagine a better roommate than him. People made plenty of comments about how you both— two people of the opposite gender— renting an apartment together would be a recipe for disaster.

While Jisung had assured you that everything would be alright, the weeks leading up to move-in day were filled with apprehension for you. But unlike what he believed, it wasn’t because of what others said. The thought of you and Jisung living together made you worry if proximity could potentially make it easier for him to realize your feelings for him. 

However, when the big day rolled in, you couldn’t remember any of your fears as you and Jisung sat in your new apartment, leaned against a pile of half-opened luggage. Exhausted from dealing with delayed furniture shipments and sorting through the endless boxes of belongings, both of you had given up. Resolving to lay on the barren floor and play Go-Fish, you both laughed for hours about the annoyed look on the grumpy mover’s face when Jisung kept asking him questions. Before Jisung subsequently fell asleep on your lap, he promised you that you both would make a lot of good memories here. And you did.

Last Christmas, you both spent it together, huddled on the couch while gossiping and drinking hot chocolate, because both of your flights got canceled due to snow. Then there was the time Jisung forced you to stay awake with him all night because he was scared after watching some bad slasher film, but you told him Disney bedtime stories that eventually made his fear go away.

You can’t help but feel a small pang thinking of whenever he brings you strawberry shortcake from the bakery you like, or all of the times he spam calls you when you’re out late and haven’t informed him. You’ve never fought with Jisung like this, not without him immediately coming after you and begging you to forgive him, even if he wasn’t in the wrong. Being distant with Jisung is a new feeling, and you don’t get how you could ever accomplish that with your best friend in the whole world. 

Shaking off your incessant thoughts about Jisung, you turn on your computer, hunching over on your desk in the artificial glow of the screen. You still have a few chapters of reading to get through, and then you have to solve ten long practice problem sets for Chemistry. For now, you’ll have to put off the deliberations that pull at you.

“Y/N.”

You feel someone shaking you awake, gentle hands coaxing you out of an uneasy nap. You lift your head from where it rests on your arms, blearily looking up from where you are slumped over your desk. Your laptop has fallen asleep, the dim glow of your lamp lighting up the room instead. And the blaring, unwelcome red of your digital clock signals an unfortunate time well past twelve. Rubbing your eyes, you finally notice Jisung hovering beside you hesitantly.

“I thought you’d want me to wake you up,” Jisung says, his hands shoved into the pockets of his pajama pants. “I’m sorry.”

He’s wearing a black sweatshirt with the hood pulled up snugly over his head, a few soft pieces of hair messily sticking out from underneath. He looks so cute you want to hug him, but then you remember the events that transpired before you accidentally fell asleep. 

“It’s okay. I need to finish working, thanks,” you say dully, both tired from studying and being stuck in this bad day with Jisung.

He shakes his head. “No, I mean, I’m sorry for earlier. At the coffee shop.”

You bite your lip, melting at the regret and sadness in his eyes. Your best friend misses you too. “Can we talk?”

Jisung stays quiet before speaking, and you swear he can probably hear your anticipating heartbeat filling the room. “Are you hungry? We didn’t have dinner.” 

He doesn’t answer your question, but you still fold at the thought of how he didn’t eat without you. “Yeah, I am hungry.”

“I’ll make us something.” He turns and heads into the kitchen, and after a second thought, you hurry after him. 

Jisung takes off his hood and brings out a metal pot out of one of the cupboards. You watch as he rummages hastily through the fridge, before he shuts it with empty hands. He turns to you with a sheepish look on his face. “So we don’t actually have any food.”

Realization passes between the both of you: in the past few weeks, you both were so immersed in your preparation for your exams that you had completely neglected buying groceries, opting instead for easy pre-cooked meals or food deliveries. Your stomach rumbles loudly, and you rub it, embarrassed, but at least it breaks the tension, as Jisung snorts, an amused look on his face.

“We could go to the store and get something,” he suggests, from where he stands behind the kitchen island. 

He fidgets nervously, a reminder of how any other time, you would have jumped at the opportunity to ditch your books and buy cheap junk food with Jisung. But now? You don’t want to go out. You want to stay here, you want to talk to your best friend, you want things to go back to how they were before your fight with Jisung. And yet, you nod your head in agreement, grabbing your apartment keys and wallet from the counter before following Jisung out of the apartment. 

The hallways of the building are tainted a vivid yellow from the incandescent lighting, a sharp contrast to the gloomy night outside. The moon is high up in the sky, shrouding the sleepy apartment complex in a silvery glow. There’s no one outside except for a homeless man dozing on one of the benches lining the walkways. But the distant city lights tell you that not everyone slumbers, that outside of your bubble, people have their own lives and stories. The only story that matters to you, however, is the one with the beautiful boy who walks beside you, his step heavy and eyes downcast. 

In a matter of wordless minutes, you and Jisung have arrived at your go-to place for midnight runs, a sketchy little convenience store peeking out from behind a cluster of drab office buildings. The neon lighting of the store glows in the dark and reflects in the pools of water left by a mild rain that had graced the land while you were sleeping. 

Jisung quickly walks ahead of you and opens the door for you, a blast of air conditioning granting you solace from the humidity. The familiar sight of the plentiful arrays of colorful aisles and the broken fan hopelessly creaking by the entrance pulls you in. You scour the shelves of mouthwatering foodstuffs, before settling in front of one of the sections.

“I don’t know if it’s a noodles or sandwich kind of night,” you wonder out loud, picking up a pack of ramen. You don’t notice Jisung standing behind you, as you assume he’s already zeroed in on the ice cream freezer like he always does.

“Definitely ramen.”

You jump, hugging the packet to your chest as if it would protect you from the perpetrator. Jisung innocently watches you, a small smile playing upon his lips. He holds two wrapped popsicles in his hands, one melon-flavored and one mango-flavored, and stretches the latter out to you. You accept it, returning his smile, and it feels like things are normal again. You know you should bring up what lies unspoken between you two, but you want to preserve this moment for now.

Jisung selects ramen for himself as well, and you both go to the front counter to check-out, failing to exchange any more words as you both just continue to enjoy the calm. After, you both quickly exit the shop and start jogging in synchronization, remembering that a pile of work still awaits you. When you board the bridge that connects the rest of the city to the way back to your apartment, Jisung doubles over, panting. 

You decide to take a break, walking over to the edge and drinking in the view. The blurred lights of the magnificent skyscrapers illuminate the midnight sky like lightning, and the river in front of you is littered with cargo ships peacefully gliding along on their separate journeys. You lean against the railing, closing your eyes and letting the wind ruffle your hair. Jisung comes up behind you once more, but when he speaks this time, it’s less of a surprise and more of a comfort. 

“Everything is changing,” he says, resting his hands on the railing as well. “I’m scared.”

You open your eyes, turning to face Jisung. His eyes are filled with tears, and your heart reaches out for him. You tightly grasp his hand, trying to convey everything you can’t say to him. 

“Talk to me. Please.”

“I’m not ready for all of this. Graduation’s getting closer, and I know you’re excited but… I don’t know, I still feel kind of stuck.” Jisung’s gaze fixates on one of the boats below. “Every time I type out a line of code, I want to smash my keyboard into bits. Every goddamn time.”

His words are strong, but his voice is rough with emotion. 

“Jisung, don’t do this if it’s not what you want.”

“We’re literally graduating in a month, Y/N.” Jisung lets out a disbelieving sound. “But that’s not even a concern, because my grad school actually offers a joint program on computers and audio design for engineering students who want to go into music production. But I couldn’t do that, because you barely get paid unless you make it big.”

You frown, setting down the plastic cover of your food. “Well, why not? If anyone could break out, it’s you.”

Jisung shrugs, shaking his head. “I can’t take that risk. Just plain old computer science is the way to go.”

You stay quiet for a second, keenly observing his despairing expression. “Your mom would want you to be happy, Hannie.”

“I could be happy, maybe, one day. But not right now.” Jisung runs a hand through his hair, not meeting your eyes. “You’re moving away next year for your PhD, and I’ll still be stuck here, in a place where you aren’t there.”

“I’m only two hours away. You can get away from campus and visit all the time. We’ll be like the Kardashians taking on a new city!” You crack a watery smile.

Jisung sniffles sadly, and your heart sinks, because you failed to make him happy. Again. But then he looks up at you, a glimmer of humor in his eyes. “Only if I get to be Kourtney.”

You laugh, shoving him in the arm. “Fine.”

And then you both say nothing again, just gazing out at the world beyond this bridge and instant.

“What happened today?” You break the silence— questioning, not accusing.

Jisung groans. “It’s… look, I know we’ve both dated before, but none of them were it. And maybe you never felt that way, but I know for a fact that none of the guys you dated were right for you.”

“Jisung—” you start, but he interrupts you.

“And we’re graduating soon. So I thought you’d realize it by now.” Jisung taps his foot like he always does when he’s nervous, and your pulse quickens at his halting words. 

“Realize what?” You ask him softly, trying not to come to any conclusions but betrayed by the treacherous beat of your heart.

The tips of Jisung’s ears turn red. “I- I need you to not say anything. Because I need to say something. And if you don’t like what I say, then I’ll walk away and we can forget everything that transpired here. Okay?”

You maintain your serious expression, although you want to swoon at his adorably flustered state. “Okay.”

Jisung is about to finally reveal what has gotten him so worked up, but then he sighs in frustration, shaking his head. “No. I can’t do this with you looking at me. Can you please turn around? Please?”

Hiding a smile, you oblige him and face the other way. “Okay. I can’t see you now.”

You hear Jisung take a deep breath. 

“I’m never going to get this right. Y/N, I like you. And I mean like-like you. Like, romantically. Everything about you, I like. Even your disgusting food combinations, I like. Your smile? Oh god. Don’t go on a date with Soobin. Go with me. I like you.” 

Even though the past few minutes manifested Jisung’s declaration, you still whirl around, shocked. “Say what?”

Jisung rolls his eyes. “Seriously? I pour myself out to you and you need me to repeat it? You’re really something, Y/N.”

You smirk, stepping closer and looping your arms around Jisung’s neck. You take in how Jisung’s eyes have widened and how his lips are parted at such an intimate gesture from you, wondering if this is how it feels in the movies, when the heroine finally gets the boy she’s been loving from a distance for so long. 

You look up at Jisung, and your heart has never felt so happy. “I guess this is my time to be vulnerable too. I don’t just like-like you, Jisung. I love you.”

It’s Jisung’s turn to be surprised. “Wait, really?”

“Yeah. For a very long time.”

He smiles bashfully, his elation at your own confession evident. “I love you too.”

Jisung tilts his head to his right, as you do the same, almost about to close the miniscule space between you both. And then he pulls away.

You watch Jisung, confused, as he covers his face with his palms, shyly giggling. “I’m sorry, it’s just that I dreamed of this for so long. Can you give me a second?” 

Never able to get enough of his antics, you watch as he pulls a stick of chapstick out of his pocket and swipes it on. He dabs his lips carefully before turning back to you. 

“Now where were we?”

Before you can even say anything, he’s closed that gap. His lips are soft and sweet, the taste of cherry and vanilla chapstick lingering. You close your eyes and melt into the kiss as Jisung brings up his hands to cradle your face. The sweet scent of him clouds your senses and washes away your inhibitions, and there’s nothing besides you both in this moment. He kisses you like there’s no tomorrow, no exams, no school or anyone else. He kisses you not like a friend, but a lover that he’s yearned for, which certainly wouldn’t be a lie.

You can’t believe that you’ve been pining after Jisung for the mere duration of your college years. It feels like you’ve waited your whole life for this. The murky puddles of water around you and the pungent stench of a nearby dumpster are nowhere near romantic, but with the way you’re kissing Jisung, you might as well be in heaven. 

If you dare to predict the future, you’ll have the rest of your life to look forward to moments like this, miss him even when he’s laying in your arms, love him when you both slow dance in the refrigerator light at midnight. And because you’re two broke peas in a pod, you both will definitely conduct more fake proposals with each other when you go out to eat. Hopefully before the real deal. You’ll just have to see who pops the question first. 

“Wow,” Jisung breathes against your lips. “My dreams have not done this moment any justice.”

You chuckle, leaning in for another kiss. “Mine too.” 

But Jisung dodges your lips, making you scoff as he raises his eyebrows at you. “And what are you going to be doing about Soobin?”

“You should be nicer. Poor Soobin. I wouldn’t have to let him down now if you’d just told me all of this earlier,” you scold Jisung lightly, cupping his chin. 

He pouts, swatting at your arms with the oversize sleeves of his hoodie. “Never mind. Let’s stop talking about him.”

You roll your eyes playfully and wrap your arms around his waist, pulling him closer. You’re sure that the lovesick look on Jisung’s face mirrors your own. He may not be perfect, but he’s perfect for you. Your best friend in the whole world. And whatever the future holds, that will never change.

“I love you, Hannie. Love you so much,” you whisper, pressing another soft kiss to his lips. You’ll never, ever get tired of kissing him.

Jisung smiles down at you lovingly, slipping off his hoodie to put it on you, noticing the way you shiver. But you’re not really that cold; it's the way he’s looking at you right now. Not that you’d tell him that. “Let’s go.”

“Where?” You ask, still in a dreamy daze. This day has turned out to be better than any other you’ve ever had. Everything was worth it.

“Home.”

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[ellestray]

Burden.

Han x gender neutral reader. Angsty fluff. Implied idol!au. Friends to lovers. 826 words.

!! Very small implicit mention of depression.

Note: this is my first fic ever & i'm stepping out of my comfort zone by posting it- i hope you'll like it! i'd be very happy to take any constructive criticism :) also, english isn't my first language, so i apologise for any mistake. thank you for reading! & thank you to the wonderful, talented @astraystayyh for encouraging me and giving me advice 🤍

recommended playlist: from this place - John Pizzarelli there's no such thing as love. nevertheless, - Jeong Eun Park & Park Jungeun non è la fine - Yiruma

"Do you ever wonder how we got here?"

You don't really know if Han is thinking of your respective careers, or your bond that blurred the lines between simple comradeship and romance— but it doesn't matter. Your answer would've been the same anyway.

You acquiesce. "Yeah."

Frankly, he doesn't know what exactly he's asking you about either. It's too late to think about it, anyway. But in this moment, sitting down on the cold floor of the practice room, he can only feel the warmth radiating from your near body. Maybe this very moment is what he's inquiring about.

"It doesn't matter how we got here, honestly. I'm just glad we're here." You add, flashing him a smile in the reflection of the mirror facing you. Seeing this interaction from a third party perspective makes him smile as well. His friends were right; you do look good together.

Since when had your existence become so bright to him, who's so used to darkness? It's like the sun had graced him with its presence, letting him know that it'll be okay. It'll all be okay, as long as you shine.

He wasn't sure how to convey this to you, though.

You've both been fully aware what you have is more than a simple friendship. Lingering touches and long stares were your way of telling each other that you knew. Nonetheless, irrational fears have always kept you from speaking it out. You both are somewhat cynical, dreading the ultimate end before anything had even started.

But the serenity he feels in this moment helps him forget the end could even exist.

"Shouldn't we talk about it?"

This time, you know exactly what he's thinking of.

"I don't know. Should we? We're fine like this." You sigh quietly. You had always been scared of this moment coming, where he's made his mind up, lost patience, or just needs answers from you.

"I mean, we can't just keep playing games forever."

You frown, upset he'd take this lightly. "This isn't a game to me."

"I know, to me neither", he quickly answers. "But we're acting like it. We can't- I can't physically act like you're mine while verbally acting like we're nothing. It hurts."

"Jisung-" You try to interject, but promptly get interrupted.

"We push and pull as if we had an eternity ahead of us. Y/n, we can't wait for each other forever. Waiting always leads to something. There needs to be a moment where the wait stops, and you're finally faced with what you've been expecting."

You stay quiet. It happened a few times before- Han trying to let you know, or at least implying he needed more. He's never been so direct, though, fearing screwing things up by being too blunt. This is new.

"Just me saying this should be enough to halt the wait. I'm crossing the line." He continues, turning to face you, rather than your reflection. "But why does it feel like we're still stuck?"

You allow yourself to take a moment to think, and he lets you. He always does. Even with all this wait talk, he still remains patient. It's almost frustrating.

"You know there's a shit ton of things that are blockages. For... you and I." You look down, trying to internally deal with your nerves.

"Tell me what they are. We can just get rid of them together." His voice is so soft, so quiet it's painful.

We. Together. You might implode if he keeps referring to the both of you as a singular entity.

"There's our careers. We're both drowning in work. Besides, if we get caught, what will people say?"

"If we have time to be friends, we have time to be lovers. We can make time for each other like we always have."

Lovers. That hit you like a ton of bricks.

"And, 'besides', I don't recall you ever caring about people's opinions. You know I don't care either", he resumes. "What's really holding you back, y/n?"

Of course, he could see through you. There's absolutely no point in not being straightforward.

"It's just... Those feelings, they're so unique and overwhelming, it's like they're crushing me. I'm suffocating, I can't keep suppressing them— but I don't know how to deal with them, or how to express them. And, if I'm being honest, I genuinely don't think I'll be able to live if something happens to us because of how much I'm lacking."

"You can learn. That's what love is all about, growing and learning together."

Love. He said it.

"You don't get it, Ji. You deserve for love to be at your image. Loud, prideful, genuine. You deserve someone that will always make you feel as special as you are and.. deeply, intensely loved. I've never had to express those things, and I don't have much room to. I just don't know how to do that."

"Then let me. I'll carry the burden of expressing our feelings."