#HOW TF IS A CIRCLE BECOME SQUARE??

[sharkxteeth]

Granny squares will forever be a form of witchcraft to me as someone who does mostly amigarumi and small clothing items.

[laurensprentiss]

Jouska [Hotch x Reader]

Chapter 11:

Gif Credit: @dudeitiskarev

A/N: I told you shit was going to kick tf off! Poor Hotch is not having a good day today.

Warnings: Explicit details of injury, strong language. 

———

“Each meeting occurs at the precise moment for which it was meant. Usually, when it will have the greatest impact on our lives.” - Nadia Scrieva

———

‘Fitzgerald House’ sits in white letters on an antique black board at the gateway entrance. Hotch turns over the engine and peers over at the notebook in McCall’s hand, squinting at the gated estate in front of him. 

They’re buzzed in by a security guard, and as they drive up, the estate expands. A pillared terrace is framed by dark brick, neatly trimmed shrubs line the circle driveway and encase a grand fountain. Behind it, a set of antique double doors are framed by more huge pillars and blossom trees umbrella the pathway. 

“Are you sure this is the right address, Aaron?” Mccall asks.

He nods. “Fitzgerald House. This is it.”

They step out of the car simultaneously, looking around them, the estate more intimidating up close. There’s something cold about this place, a familiarity he identifies with all too well. 

“This seem like the kind of place a twenty-something lives in?” McCall asks in disbelief. 

Hotch scoffs, air leaving his nose in an exhale. “Senator Fitzgerald’s twenty-something.” 

Hotch is light on his feet, feels as though he’s dirtying the kept tile pathway just by walking on it. Truth is, he’d grown up in a home like this - or spent his summers there at least. He’d felt just as uncomfortable then as he does now. He knows what kind of people are on the other side of those doors, and knows the kind of people that live here. Cold, calculating, drenched in privilege, toxicity and unbearable expectations. 

Borderline abusive. 

He was raised by them. 

He pulls his credentials from his inside pocket and reaches for the doorbell. They take a minute or so and when there’s no answer, he makes a fist and bangs on the door with the side of it. 

“Open up, FBI.” 

A woman finally pulls open one of the double doors, straining almost with the weight of it, the oak creaking. She’s around 40 years old, stands at 5’4 and she’s thin, dark hair pulled back into a tight bun, greying slightly towards her hairline. A black and white apron completes her uniform.

“FBI? Can I help you?” She speaks with an accent, a thick lilt to her words. Eastern European, maybe, Hotch thinks. 

“I’m Agent Hotchner, this is Agent McCall. We’re with the FBI.” They flip their credentials to show the lady, her eyes squint to read the writing on them. “And you are?” 

“I’m the housekeeper. Carolina.” She says. 

“Hello, Carolina. We’re looking for a Jordan Fitzgerald?” Hotch inquires with a smile. 

“Oh.” She stutters and glances behind her, frozen in place. 

“May we come in?”

“Yes, yes, sorry. Please, come in, I think Mr. Fitzgerald is still in bed. Just a second.” 

They step into the foyer of the home, taking in the room - it’s bright and airy, a white marble staircase leading up and off into both directions sits in the middle, framed by a dark bannister. The refined marble floor, and white walls make the both of them feel uncomfortable, uneasy. Tight-lipped family portraits and oil paintings of numerous well to do ancestors line the walls, casting a disapproving eye.

To the right, is a drawing room, where Carolina seats the two men, plush leather sofas are carefully placed in front of a massive window with a view of the front garden. An oversized antique ceramic vase sits in the corner of the room, perfectly polished and buffed.

Hotch swallows uneasily, his eyes scanning the room. 

They both sit tentatively, careful not to scuff the antique rug that lays below them. McCall glances at his watch and mutters to Hotch, taking care to look around so nobody hears him. 

“Bed? It’s noon.” 

Hotch scoffs, raising his eyebrows sarcastically. He pulls his phone out of his pocket, sees some missed calls from Haley that he skips over, shooting off a quick text to you. 

Hey. Good luck with your dad today. 

Talking to you is fast becoming one of the best parts of his day - he feels a little like a teenager again. His phone buzzes and he hopes it’s your name on the screen, he has a spring in his step whenever he’s on duty and he doesn’t have as much trouble waking up in the morning, knowing that you’re waiting for him. 

He’s suddenly ripped from his thoughts when giggles erupt from the top of the stairs, and two sets of footsteps approach. Hotch cranes his head in unison with McCall as a blonde woman with dishevelled blonde hair and smudged eyeliner stumbles down the stairs, shirt buttons done unevenly and skirt askew. 

She carries her shoes in her hands and has a purse tucked under her arm - Hotch concludes that she was probably drunk last night, the effects of which she’s still feeling now if her stumbling is any indication. 

Who he assumes is Jordan, trails behind her with a grin on his face. He’s undressed with only a pair of boxer shorts covering him and a dressing gown that lays open. Hotch and McCall shoot each other a wordless look and Aaron has to fight to stop himself from rolling his eyes. 

Jordan surprisingly has the decency to walk his unnamed friend to the front door, who turns and plants what looks like a messy and unpleasant kiss on his mouth. 

This is Jordan? 

Nice.

He’s tall but still stands a couple of inches shorter than Hotch, he’s broad with brown hair and matching eyes and has a tattoo across his clavicle, which he covers up when he pulls his dressing gown closed. McCall clears his throat when the unnamed friend releases herself from Jordan’s grip and turns to leaves after having Jordan swat her ass crudely. 

Jordan turns his attention then to the agents in his drawing room, padding towards them as they both stand in unison to introduce themselves. He glances at Hotch, eyes narrow, a miniscule flash of recognition appearing on his face. He subconsciously squares his shoulders and stands up a little straighter, gaze falling to the FBI badge Hotch has pinned on his lapel. 

“Mr. Fitzgerald? We’re with the FBI.” McCall tells him with an outstretched hand. 

Jordan takes it warmly, plastering a smile on his face. “What can I do for you gentlemen?”

McCall tells him that they’re here in connection with an ongoing case regarding you, to which Jordan has surprisingly little reaction, Hotch notes. 

Instead, he turns his attention to Hotch. “FBI huh?” He places his hands in his hips, an obvious attempt at trying to assert his dominance, and Hotch sees right through him. “Impressive,” he continues. “How old are you anyway, man?” His words drip with sarcasm and do nothing to veil the obvious insecurity he feels. 

He unsuccessfully tries to level with Hotch, subtly tiptoeing. 

Hotch’s jaw clenches as he looks down at Jordan. “24.” 

He repeats Hotch’s words slowly, ignoring McCall - who finds himself frozen in place, uneasy with the almost confrontational atmosphere between his partner and Jordan. 

“Wow. Someone’s ambitious. Got a lot to prove-” he flicks his badge. “Hotchner?” 

Hotch finds the words on the tip of his tongue, wants to chew this asshole out for being a sleazy piece of shit, difficult and lazy. But the thing that really bothers him, the thing that makes Hotch want to give him a black eye, is the fact that at one point, you were his - and his own actions sent you running back into Jordan’s arms. 

That thought makes his stomach drop, because it’s a feeling he’s wholly unfamiliar with. 

Jealousy. 

And he finds that most disconcerting of all. 

He’s used to being able to do his job with a degree of separation and compartmentalisation, to keep his emotions in check - but he finds himself in a predicament now, one that’s becoming alarmingly clear. The lines are blurred and he knows it, no matter how hard he tries to push it down. 

But he tries anyway. 

He takes a deep breath and goes on. “You mind putting some clothes on, bud? We have some questions for you?” His tone is biting, condescension masked with amiability, similar to the way he would speak to a child. He tacks on the ‘Bud’ to purposely get a rise out of Jordan. 

If there’s one thing he learned from his parents growing up, it was how to get under people’s skin with a smile plastered on his face, and he knew people like Jordan. 

He used to be a Jordan.

Jordan steps towards Hotch, his eyes narrow, a slew of expletives on the tip of his tongue no doubt until McCall subtly steps between them. He stops in his tracks, eyes still focused on Hotch standing behind McCall. 

His demeanour changes completely and suddenly, the animosity melting away to make way for his initial warm manner. 

He takes a deep breath and plasters an unnerving smile on his face. 

With a tilt of his head, he says, “I actually have back to back appointments today, may I come into your offices tomorrow?” His cadence sounds eloquent, polite, the way Hotch knows he was probably raised to speak. 

He frowns at the rapid 180. 

McCall subsequently agrees to let Jordan come into the office to keep the peace but Hotch knows better. The only appointments he would have would be with a few lines of coke and a bottle of scotch if his jaw movements and body odour were anything to go by. 

Still, Ben hands him a business card and tells him to come by at around 3pm for a few questions and bids him a quick goodbye. 

Hotch’s phone buzzes on his way out, a message from you telling him that you’re on your way to your father’s with Emily. 

‘Oh and like three MPD officers.’’ You add. ‘One’s new I think? How’s it going with Jordan?’ 

A small smile creeps its way onto his face while his attention is diverted and his eyes are glued to his phone. 

Jordan watches Hotch and McCall walk back down the pathway and into the car. His eyes narrow from the doorway as he gives a cursory glance to the business card he holds between his index and middle finger, and he flicks it onto the ground outside. 

McCall clears his throat once they’re in the car, but Hotch’s attention is still directed at his phone. He clears his throat again, a little louder this time.

Hotch’s eyes dart up as he looks at McCall. “What?” He asks innocently, slipping the phone into the centre console. 

“That who I think it is?” 

“Yeah, I just checked in to see if everything was alright.” He rubs the back of his neck, a dead giveaway gesture to anyone who knew him well enough.  

“Yeah? Then why do you look like that?”

“Like what-”

Without warning, McCall reaches over and pulls down the driver’s seat visor, sliding the mirror cover over. Hotch’s face is flushed, a ghost of a smile on his face, akin to a smug teenager. His guilty reflection stares back at him and stops him in his tracks. He didn’t realise he looked like that when he was thinking about you and he’s alarmed at how transparent he is. 

No, he thinks. So what? It’s warm, it’s even warmer in this car. 

It’s fine.

Still, he sighs, rolls his eyes. “What?” Hotch says, insistent as he turns a little in his seat. 

McCall sighs deeply next to him, hesitant. “Just. Be careful.” He says, head tilting to motion to his phone. 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” 

“You know what I’m talking about, Aaron.” He says, his voice low. “I see the way you look at her. And what about that little display inside? Why were you so confrontational with Fitzgerald?” 

He rolls his eyes. “Oh come on. You gotta be kidding me! You saw the way he was antagonising me-”

“-Yeah and your job is to stay calm no matter what. You’re not supposed to let people get a rise out of you, especially not if you want a place at the BAU one day. Gideon got word of you, he thinks you’re good. Prove him right.”  

He sounds like an older brother lecturing him, but he has a point, Hotch thinks. Why was he so bothered by Jordan? 

He knows why. He doesn’t know how much longer he can deny it.

The feelings he’d tried so hard to bury deep inside were quickly rising to the surface, faster than even he could get a handle on them. Maybe all he could do at this point was to relax his body and let the water carry him - sink or swim. The possibility of what could be, maybe it was too big to keep fighting. 

He has feelings for you. 

He has feelings for you despite the numerous conflicts of interest, despite the moral implications and the danger to your investigation. 

He swallows dryly. 

“You have feelings for her.” McCall says, mirroring his conscience. 

He doesn’t know what to say back, but he certainly can’t bring himself to deny it. He’s not that good of a liar. Yet. 

He just stares back at McCall whose face is etched in concern for his partner. 

He has feelings for you. 

———

It’s dark when you hug your father goodbye. You hadn’t realised just how homesick you’d been for him until you’d visited today, more so now as you’re about to leave. 

You stand in the dreary rain and apologise again for not telling him about the restaurant incident, reassuringly rubbing his hand as you tell him you’re going to be okay. 

“Really, truly.” You tell him over the patter of the rain. “I’m going to be absolutely fine. I have Emily watching over me now.” 

He nods and places a kiss on your forehead. “Yes, but that doesn’t change the fact that I still worry.” He sighs. “Bye, baby.” 

You wave to him one last time, pulling your coat closer to your body before you and Emily drive away, MPD leading the way. You glare at her, watching her avoid your looks. She grips the wheel a little tighter, and keeps glancing in the rear view mirror despite there being nothing there. 

After a minute or so, she grits between her teeth, “What? I can feel you staring at me.” 

“You told Dad?” You hiss. “I specifically told you not to, and you still told him?” 

“I’m sorry! He asked me outright if anything had happened, what was I supposed to do? Lie?”

“Yes!” You squeal. “Yes! You’re supposed to lie if I ask you to!”

“Come on, that’s bullshit and you know it. He deserves to know that you’re okay. Think about it, what if it had been him? You’d wanna know.” 

In your attempts to not worry him, you’d forgotten that you were all he had, too. Maybe he was right for holding on so tight. 

“I am sorry, though. I should’ve let you tell him.” Emily whispers, glancing at you. 

“No.” You shake your head and apologise too. “You were right.” 

“Does he fly out tomorrow?” 

“Uh, no. Tonight. Some trip that’s been scheduled for months,” you reply distracted, watching the officers in front of you. 

The MPD car turns its hazard lights on, signalling to pull over on the side of the quiet road. You peer at the vehicle in front of you, confused, checking with Emily who shrugs. A text from one of the officers reads, 

‘Reports of a disturbance ahead, assessing alternate route.’ 

“Better settle in.” You show Emily the text and relax into your seat a little better now, leaning your head against the headrest and resting your eyes as the heater runs in the background. The rain slows to a drizzle now. 

She unbuckles her seatbelt to turn her seat. “Can I ask you a question?” Emily says after a while. 

“Sure.” You reply, eyes remaining closed. 

“You have feelings for him, don’t you?” She whispers.

“Who?” You frown. 

“Hotch.”

You all but jump out of your skin. “What?!” You squeak.

Emily rolls her eyes now, embarrassed that you’re even trying to deny it. “Come on. It’s me. Don’t lie.”

Your mouth opens and closes, trying to find the words but your cheeks burn. It’s not entirely unexpected, Emily’s always been somewhat of an inner voice, a mirror that holds you accountable but you’d been quietly trying to work out your issues, the feelings you’d been having for Hotch, internally. 

Had you made it that obvious? Had you made yourself look stupid and naive, pining after a guy who was so much older and settled in life? 

“No of course I don’t, where is this coming from?” Your cheeks grow even hotter and you try to keep your voice even. 

She rolls her eyes. “Everyone can see it.”

“See what? There’s nothing to see!” 

You groan and bury your face in your hands in mortification. If everyone could see it, that meant that Hotch could too, he was on his way to being a profiler for God’s sake. He was probably just humouring you, sparing your feelings.

Oh God. 

“I mean the way you look at him?” Emily says.

“-Please stop, this is so embarrassing-” 

“-The way he looks at you?”

You freeze. “What?” You turn to look at her now and you find her smirking. 

“Come on, you’re seriously telling me you haven’t noticed? I noticed the day I met him, so you’re either blind or in denial, and I know you’re not blind. Even McCall knows it.” 

“What? No. He has a girlfriend and he wouldn’t-”

“Yeah that might be true, and I can’t speak to that. But it doesn’t change the way he looks at you. Even the way he held you that day? You don’t hold a friend like that.” 

Your chest feels fuzzy, warmth spreading to your bones, stomach flipping. 

“So?” Emily laughs next to you as she watches your expression. You try your best to stop the smile making its way onto your face. “I’ll take that as a yes,” She pauses. “He does too, y’know?” 

“What?”

“Have feelings for you.” She replies coyly. 

“Shut up.” You reply, rolling your eyes. 

Your smile reaches your ears now, cheeks aching from the strain. Still, you shake your head, and blow her off, instead turning your attention to the other side of the road. You chew on the inside of your lip, mulling over whether to let what you just heard go ignored or if you wanted to act on it. 

You turn back to confide in Emily but before you can, you see her squinting in the rear view mirror. 

“What the hell?” She mutters. You follow her gaze and see a car with beaming headlights, driving towards you, showing no signs of slowing down as it approaches. She sits up straight in her seat suddenly, as the car increases its speed and barrels towards you. 

The colour on her face drains as she fumbles with the gear stick and pedal, panic taking over as she attempts to move out of the way. You both flinch when the MPD car’s tail lights switch on, the engine revving and reversing. 

Both of your faces fall. “Emily...” You pant. 

“Oh God.”

It’s over in a couple of seconds. 

The headlights get closer and brighter, both cars barrelling towards you. You squeeze your eyes shut and brace yourselves for impact, your hand clasping hers as both cars ram into you, the seatbelt searing the neck of your skin. The airbags pummel your body from the front and side and your insides feel like they're turning upside down. 

Your neck snaps forward with the impact, glass shattering and piercing the skin on your face and arms as the blood pools slowly from your forehead. A high-pitched whine penetrates your skull as you look over to a barely conscious Emily, and then to the side mirror, a dark silhouette approaching the car. Your breathing is rapid, chest rising and falling as you hyperventilate before you finally black out with the taste of metal in your mouth. 

———

Hotch throws his keys haphazardly on to the table that sits next to the front door, loosens his tie and shrugs his blazer off. He finally breathes a sigh of semi-relief, feeling exhausted. He doesn’t bother calling out to the empty space to let Haley know he’s home, instead decides to just make his way upstairs and get a shower before turning in for the night. 

His shirt is unbuttoned and his socks are in his hands when he turns his attention towards the laundry basket in the corner of their bedroom. He goes to throw them in the hamper when he frowns, some stray fabric catching his attention behind the basket. 

Haley strolls into the room then, rubbing lotion into her hands as Hotch moves the basket to get a better view of the fabric behind it. She double takes when her eyes fall to what he’s doing, spotting what he’s reaching for. The colour drains from her face. 

She’s too late. 

Hotch pinches the fabric between his index finger and thumb and inspects it in front of him, frowning, Haley swallows dryly, going lightheaded.

A pair of boxers.

He frowns. They’re not his, but he swears he’s seen some like them before. 

“Hey, where did these-”

He barely gets through the whole sentence before Haley’s face gives her away entirely. Her lips are pursed and she’s breathing hard, wringing her hands. 

His face falls and he blinks at her, stuck in denial. 

Surely not. She couldn’t have- 

She averts her gaze, looking instead at the carpet on the floor, cheeks hot when the boxers are thrown at her feet. She flinches. 

“Explain.” He demands. 

She opens her mouth but no words come, her head hangs in shame.

“How long?” He asks. “How. Long?!” His voice booms.

“It happened when I left for those two weeks.” Her voice barely registers above a whisper. 

Anger bubbles in his chest when he does the math, “You’ve been cheating on me for two months? Two months?! Was that him this morning?” His nostrils are flared and he knows he’s getting louder now, but he doesn’t care. 

She nods. 

“Use your words, was it him?” He hisses. 

She sobs, “Yes.” 

His mind runs rampant with fury and humiliation, he’d spent the last four months trying to make sure he put her first, had tried to balance his personal and work life and instead of meeting him in the middle, she had betrayed him in such a humiliating way. 

He paces the length of their bedroom now, head scrambling at the proverbial slap he’s just received . The cold familiarity of where he’d seen the fabric before suddenly dawns on him, creeping up his spine.

He stops dead in his tracks, turning to face her, asking the question he doesn’t want the answer to. “What’s his name?” He asks evenly. 

“Jordan - Fitzgerald.” 

He’d always thought the phrase, blood turning to ice, was just a saying but when Haley says those two words, he feels as though the floor has been pulled out from under him and his stomach sinks. He tries to piece together all of the moving parts, tries to connect the dots - he knows what this is, but his brain is still playing catch up. 

He’s in a daze when he answers a call from McCall, his voice even. “I’m on my way to you, there’s been an accident.”

“An accident?” That pulls him out of his daze, a cold harsh push back into reality. Haley’s head whips up when she hears the words, tears streaming down her face. “Where?” He asks. 

McCall pauses. “It’s her.” 

Hotch can already feel what’s coming next, dread settling into his bones, his stomach churning when he remembers you’d planned to have dinner with your father. A violent shiver runs down his spine and he swallows down the bile that threatens to spill out. 

“Status?” He whispers.

“Missing.”

———

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[ravenclaw-questions-gone-writing]

Outline # -1 Abandoned Lore (Trinity)

@fanfics-and-fangirling

I have learned my lesson, I will be writing these on Google docs and then copy-pasting onto Tumblr. While I am on GD, I figured I might as well open the docs I used to write the actual fic. Man, I went through a ton of hoops to get where I am. I will be using the most coherent ones for reference. 

I can literally track my thought process as I went through writing all the different versions and I still have no idea how tf I went from this to dropping a flaming papermache whale on Ra’s Al Ghul. And I will die mad about it. Which means more meticulous notes in the future I guess.

Also, I’d like to apologize for how long it took to get this out, I have no sense of time whatsoever and as always, there’s a lot more than expected. This was 7 pages long

Original Ramble Post 

Like most of my stories, the MC is an OCI - reincarnator brought into a fictional world they once watched. (Because I am obsessed with that trope.)

I now find the original name I had for her cringy and out-of-place given these are norse gods. So, from now on her name is Lokka, which is the female version of Loki

There’s a whole ass backstory about the transition of godly names and power I won’t go into. Just think Thor and female Thor kind of thing I guess. She’s basically seen as a spare Loki but it’s also a respected position.

Was tempted to name her Sigyn since Marvel doesn’t care about actual norse myth relations. No, Idc that there’s a canon Sigyn.

If you’re curious, the original name was Aradia. Yes, like the queen of witches.

MC is an asgardian, the daughter of the librarian in the royal palace and a blacksmith

She managed to get an apprenticeship under Loki and is occasionally taught by Frigga. She also learns under Eir when both her royal teachers are busy.

Lokka found her way into the central plane, probably having found it’s location from Loki’s notes and is unaware that it’s unstable.

So, Lokka is in the central plane, having the time of her life exploring new lands when she stumbles across a crying Marinette who is very lost 

Unlike Lokka, Marinette does not know where she is or what is going on. She literally just tripped into a portal and has no way home.

Lokka takes Marinette under her wing and promises to help her find a way home

Problem is, she doesn’t know which of the three universes Marinette is from.

Even if/when she finds out that the girl is from MLB-verse, she still wouldn’t know which one that is because she has no reference to which world is which. Only that Marinette is probably not from Asgard.

At this point, she is unaware she lived in Marvel, she just knows Asgard is Norse Mythology.

So they continue to wander the central plane, Marinette ends up picking up a card guardian for a pet, accidentally becoming a cardcaptor. 

Marinette has trouble pronouncing Lokka and Lokka gives Mari permission to call her Cosette (pre-reincarnation name)

Meanwhile, Ra’s sends Damian and Talia into the Central plane for combat experience and resource gathering.

Ra’s might be 700 years old, he might have access to the Central plane but he sure doesn’t know about magic or how it came to be or the current state of it. He might know something’s off because all the inhabitants have been increasingly on edge and the weather’s been stranger than usual but he didn’t deemed it important

Notably, he has never seen anyone other than those who he’d sent in himself in the central planes (CP, from now on bc I am getting tired of typing the entire thing out) so as far as he knows, the CP’s only entrance point is under his control.

Talia and Damian, who’s still going by Hafid, go hunting for resources and training

They separate for a bit for individual hunting/training time

Marinette and Cosette (Lokka) stumble across Damian’s camp

Misunderstandings occur, Damian fights them, more accurately he fights Cosette

Cosette tries to protect Marinette while also making sure not to harm her opponent

It was harder than she expected considering her opponent was a child

Asgardian training pulls through and she is able to do both

Damian’s tied up, Marinette is confused, and Cosette does not want to deal with this

Negotiation time

Marinette can’t speak Arabic, Damian doesn’t know french, and Cosette has all-speak

This means Cosette’s sitting there, having to repeat everything the kids say to each other for translation’s sake

also misunderstandings before the kids realize allspeak is a thing

Cosette is stuck with two kids who don’t like each other, one of which barely puts up with her so she does what most adults do when kids are too troublesome

Distract them: she does magic tricks with actual magic

Damian+Marinette are fascinated, Cosette accidentally gains two magic students 

even though she’s still learning herself and all she has for guidance right now are Loki’s and Frigga’s notes

So, the trio end up travelling together

Damian demands Marinette should at least be able to fight so they train her too

They also figure out that Marinette and Damian’s worlds are not the same.

Cosette drills some value of life, basic morals, and feminism into Damian’s head

Marinette and Damian (Hafid) have trouble pronouncing each other’s names

They chose nicknames for each other from Cosette’s bedtime stories

Marinette is obviously angel or Tenko

Damian is gets Kabane, the name of a half demon

Kabane later changes to Kasane, protective blade

Yes, Cosette was/is a weeb and yes, they still mispronounce names which defeats the whole purpose but at least they kids don’t notice now even if Cosette is cringing every time they

They run into another card guardian and this one goes to Damian.

Cosette does not pout about this, it would be very immature

One training montages, several fights, a couple language lessons, and an abandoned (and Cosette-raided) house later, Cosette gets to the part of Loki’s notes where she figures out that the CP is collapsing in on itself and uh-oh

She tells the kids the gist of it but they’re too smart, ask all the right questions, and end up figuring out the important parts of situation that she’s trying to keep from them

Cosette is both impressed and a little put out, mostly impressed because not only did they figure out extremely complex magic, they also mostly remained level headed.

Marinette wants to rescue the card guardians and for once Damian is backing her up so Coestte gives up the notion of returning home and they go collect the guardians.

Remember, DC and MLB universes are closing in on each other 

MCU is drifting away

If they don’t collect the guardians, Cosette would have the time to just drop them off at their world collection points and head back to hers

After collecting a couple guardians, they end up finding Talia and explain the situation to her.

Talia joins the gang, she may or may not be plotting a marriage

They raid a couple more houses, collect the 54 card guardians, and complete the power transfer ritual (replacing the Yue’s trial because the cards are the guardians)

The cards end up latching onto the three kids. 

Marinette gets the Mistress title, Damian gets Sun Guardian, and Cosette gets Moon guardian.

Originally Cosette was going to be the mistress and Marinette the Moon guardian but because of the way I’ve decided magic works in this world - explaining that will need a whole other post - if Marinette is the moon guardian and gets the Ladybug miraculous, she will - for lack of better word - get sick and possibly die... or not.

Y’know what, it made sense at the time. But now that I think about it, we’re going back to the original idea.

Cosette’s the Card Mistress, Marinette’s the Moon guardian and Damian’s the Sun guardian.

Spoiler alert: that is a plot point for tropes-verse.

The completion of the ritual breaks puts CP deteriorations in high acceleration

Damian and Talia get into their circle, Cosette and Marinette in the other

Damian doesn’t have any cards bc he doesn’t want his grandfather trying to get to them. He and Talia agreed Ra’s would only know about the CP’s destruction. He does, however, have a CP beast that they picked up.

CP beast: magical creature that was born of CP’s magical residue or smth

Damian’s looks like a Teddiursa (Teddy bear pokemon) it is not

They have a notebook from a raided house detailing CP’s deterioration for proof

Cosette goes with Marinette because she can’t make it back to her universe and in the event that Marinette’s also from Cosette’s universe, she won’t be alone

They separate with the promise of meeting again.

At this point, I have had several differing ideas

They all go into DC world because they aren’t sure of Marinette’s world

Child trio goes into MLB world and Talia tells Ra’s Damian died

Everyone goes into MLB and Ra’s finds out about the collapse when he tries going in himself and finds out he can’t and just assumes they died

Y’all, I’m starting to see why I can’t do one-shots…

One of the things I forgot to mention in the rambling post is that while Marvel-verse was pulling away, it also messed with the time regulation thing, a day in the Maribat-verse will

Time in CP was very messed up

Kind of assumed readers could piece it together but I figured might as well make it obvious and straight up say it

MLBU: Cosette and Marinette arrive safely 

Marinette is delivered home and Cosette has to figure something out

They find out Marinette has only been gone for a week

Marinette has some separation anxiety for about three days

Cosette slowly realizing this is an MLB universe and having a crisis

Cosette gets adopted by the Dupain-Chengs and starts working at the bakery

I have not figured out ages for Cosette

MLB goes like most Maribat fics pre-gotham because I’m lazy

Will likely be adjusted if I ever actually write this fic

Except Cosette steps in when things got too far and Paris has 3 heroes

Cosette is the known as the Sorciere or Lokka

Her uniform is just her asgardian armor

Good but misguided Adrien, Cosette probably adopts him too

Love square goes platonic and Cosette is glad this rom-com is over

Magic tutoring continues

Cosette is neutral with Fu and fascinated by the miraculous

You remember those ghost interactions? Those are filtering in

One of the first things to merge is the internet, because it doesn’t have a physical body and it’s just waves of information

News and discoveries between the world are being swapped

Given what I remember from DC and dimension travel, it wouldn’t be surprising if they figured out universes were merging.

The news about JL and Paris’s situation are causing all kinds of confusion

Cosette beings looking for information on Damian

As the physical world begins merging, there’s pockets of space where you can slip from one world into another; not quite portals but close

Eventually the trip to NY became a trip to Gotham because their plane slipped between planes (sorry, I saw the chance and I had to take it.) but yeah, that happened.

There’s quite a few details I’m forgetting

DCU: Damian and Talia arrive ok and report bare basics to Ra’s

It has also only been a week

Ra’s is displeased to find them back until they report the state of the CP

There’s the whole coup not long after and Damian is sent to Bruce

Damian is much more innocent looking when he’s bringing what appears to be a teddy bear with him

It’s name is Abd and it has grown wings by now. Actual name pending.

He gets teased about it, but under Cosette’s teachings, he has learned the virtue of patience, underestimation, and getting revenge with a side of entertainment

He does not try to kill Tim either

He also has to make the choice of bringing Abd with him as Damian or as Robin

He choses to make a side company for WE making toys based off creatures from the CP so Abd wouldn’t look too out of place

It takes two weeks for the bats to realize there’s something off about the Abd

They are convinced it’s haunted and Damian is very entertained

Abd only moves in daytime when no one - Damian excluded - can see it

Movement can expel magic that interferes with recording tech

Alfred is the first to figure it out and surprise, surprise, he has some magic books for Damian to learn from

It’s from the Wayne family library and they just assumed the language was lost to time. At least three are from Alfred’s own family.

Bat brothers spend the next 6 months trying to convince Damian his magical pet bear is a haunted doll.

Damian sort of getting along with Poison Ivy because his Sun magic is very compatible with plants and they love him

On an unrelated note, the plants seem to refuse to attack the new Robin

Damian randomly, unconsciously humming to songs Cosette and Marinette sang

Damian just vibing with the magic users of JL and Teen Titans

No one took him seriously at first but he pointed something out during a conference

“Robin, stand down and let the magic users handle this” - Green Lantern, probably

Constantine who actually knows what he’s talking about “No, no, let the boy talk.”

The plan was twice as efficient after Damian was through with it

Now Constantine’s trying to adopt Damian as an apprentice, he’s failing bc the bats are protective and possessive of what is theirs

Reminder that Damian brings Abd with him everywhere and he’s still getting teased about it from anyone who is not a bat (still convinced the thing is haunted)

The only thing the magic users have picked up about Abd is that he’s a magical construct which could mean a number of things but they brush it off as just a doll.

No one is prepared for the thing to come to life, multiply in size, and start spitting ice, sleep sand, and illusions. (Hiccups bubbles and can also turn into a cloud.)

They are also not prepared for the thing to quadruple in size and for Damian to ride it like a horse into battle. Reminder that Abd has wings and can fly.

Confusing talk about what’s going on in Paris and some other parts of the world

JL slowly figure out the universal merger that Damian already knows about

Damian is not impressed, it took him and Angel about 2 hours as 9 year olds

Somehow, Damian still has the ice prince image, less demon spawn though, that goes to Abd

Time moves on and one day, a plane from the other world arrives in Gotham

There’s a bit of confusion but it’s not exactly the first time something like this has happened at this point

WE steps up and offers jobs and a tour and all the usual Maribat plans (not just for the kids but all the other people on the plane)

Given the merger of the internet, MLB class and crew have some idea who the Waynes are and they accept. 

Estimated about 6 months for full merger so people from MLB world are kinda just stuck there until then

Lila literally cannot lie about knowing the Waynes personally but she sure can lie about other things.

Dick and Damian are sent in to monitor the group

The reunion is awkward given they can’t freely interact and are not supposed to know each other. 

While Dick is talking, there are just wide eyed staring between Marinette, Damian, and Cosette. With something a little extra between Marinette and Damian.

Cosette is torn between laughing and groaning at another rom-com trope coming in fast.

She ends up filming it bc blackmail is always good to have

Adrien is confused and quite frankly, he’s really just there to cover for them

The tour begins and about five minutes in, the trio breaks off and exchanges stories and names.

Cosette hears about Batman and has a dawning realization of what this world is, mentally nopes out, later digests that they are going into Maribat verse

Starts checking off Maribat tropes they’re coming across bc she might as well have fun with it

They continue to meet up

Batfam thinking Damian somehow managed to get two girlfriends

Damian choking on his breakfast when it is brought up

The girls are invited to dinner and Damian is just dying inside

Cosette blatantly hitting on all Damian’s brothers in the first 5 minutes

Damian screaming internally while Cosette cackles

Dick is awkward until he realizes it’s a joke, Jason plays along, Tim has an awkward bean crisis

Tim x Cosette? Maybe.

Cosette does that sit and repeat thing at least three times out of habit

Batfam gets full explanation about how they met and everything

I have played with the idea of Cosette getting fear gassed a couple times and Idk how it would go tbh.

That’s as far as I got with this version, so shenanigans ensue

Pretty sure they used the cards and magic throughout even if I didn’t mention it

Absolutely would be useful for being in two places at once

I later changed so the merger happens and then Paris’s heroes meet the Justice League

Damian immediately recognizing Cosette but not Marinette bc magic

still effective but weaker because of Damian’s magic type

He later recognizes Marinette later when she pulls off a move he taught her way back in CP

Nickname confusion for everyone else

Cosette vs Constantine on who gets to teach Damian magic

Damian goes to Paris. They beat Hawkmoth and then go to Gotham.

Also had a general idea of a plot with LoS that never got fleshed out past existing

If we’re going for the rebound version: Cosette reunites with Thor and Loki during the Avengers movie

Also, poor Heimdallr. He probably had a lot of headaches with the universe crash

Accelerated merger because of the convergence in the dark world.

I wanna go with 2012 Avengers towers shenanigans. + Loki and his sort-of but not really daughter

Cosette vs Antman, shrinking/growing, science vs magic.

And then there’s the whole Ironman vs Batman vs Arrow rich boy fight

Hammer x Luthor or Hammer vs Luthor?

Also, Cosette just staring at her home universe in betrayal and being insulted she didn’t think of it earlier because classic Nordic myths had Loki as Odin’s brother and not his son among other things but still

Fight against Thanos is a bit anti-climatic when you give a gremlin murder child magic and a sword that can through anything, including magical artifacts.

this baby boy can and will fight God and Cosette’s not really the kind to hold him back

If I actually wrote this, a lot of things would probably change because I’d actually have to put more thought into logistics and how things work

[twdmusicboxmystery]

Chess Theory 2.0

This theory comes from a discussion me and my fellow theorists had after this ask was posted:

I really love the idea of the black and white representing the battle between the CRM and the Commonwealth. We can’t know for sure if it does, but given everything leading up to this point in the story, it definitely could. My fellow theorists and I had extensive discussions about this, with @wdway especially contributing a lot of thoughts and research.

@wdway:

Starting with the ask, I love it so much and believe they could be quite right that the black could represent the CRM and the white the Commonwealth, and they could be at odds with one another and our group. TF will be caught in the middle.

Since I feel strongly that Beth could be tied to Eugene's group’s storyline, that would make her white. Rick we know is with the CRM, which makes him black. If both Beth and Rick are fighting independently within these two groups and that would make them neither black nor white but gray. This is the part that I've said for quite a while: that gray represents a middle ground, it's neither black nor white.

Beth and Rick in Coda. I chose this shot because they almost look like one unit. Both in gray from behind so that Beth's yellow shirt is not a distraction to the gray that ties these two characters together.

I also love the fact that the red machete could easily belong to either one in this shot. And with a thought that colors have different meanings for different scenes, I believe in this particular case, the gray represents that the scene is not as black-and-white, as clear cut as it seems, that there are things going on here that the viewers are not aware of. It has shades of grey for these two characters. 

Also, it could tell us why Daryl wore one white leg tie and one black leg tie. They represent the two people that he loves and will lose, believing they are both dead. He will search for them both and not be able to find either one.

Twdmusicboxmystery: Breaking into @wdway’s thoughts here just to have a wowza moment. Can you see how they’ve set this up from the start? Can you see how it lines up? Okay, back to @wdway:

@wdway​:

I simply could not go back to the hall scene in Coda without watching Daryl carry Beth out. This time I noticed something that I had never noticed before. @Frangipanilove, this one is especially up your alley. Look at the walkway right behind Daryl. On the left side, there is two parallel lines =. On the other right side is a directional symbol <. How have we not noticed this before?

I then wanted to look at the Commonwealth soldiers, so I went to the episode 16, when Eugene's group is surrounded and again I noticed something that I didn't before. 

PM 110 and RX 04. I'll start with RX, we have always attached the "X" to Beth, it can also stand for the number 10, and it has multiple meanings. When paired with an R (which could possibly stand for Rick) RX is a medical or drug symbol used for a Latin word, "recipe" meaning "to take." Yes I Googled it. I'm not sure about the PM but 101 is the series number for s8e11, Dead or Alive Or.

@twdmusicboxmystery: Breaking in again to point out that Dead or Alive Or was one of the episode titles mentioned during the Cast Trivia Battle I posted about a few days ago. Just saying.

 @wdway:

It's the episode that is so very full of Beth symbols that it's not even funny. There also Tara and Dwight's conflict and Daryl trying to take the children/people of AZ to Hilltop. 

I do want to note in the photograph above if you look at the desk you see droplets of black paint against the white top. Like I said, every symbol that we can imagine for Beth is pretty much in that episode.

@frangipanilove​:

Love this! It actually does get my mind spinning. I had to google the meaning of PM and the literal meaning is the Latin “post meridiem”, which of course translates to “after noon”. We have all these Dawn references and midnight references and clocks etc on TWD, so an “after noon” reference doesn’t seem entirely out of place. I’ve been obsessed with ep 8x11 for a multitude of reasons. A bunch of Sirius references, the green Jaguar car, the Sirius piggy bank, FGs blindness, animal traps.

Mostly I’m obsessed about it because the original Noah’s t-shirt theory pointed to 8x2, when we saw the blue heron painting, but I later realized that the “2” could also point to 8x11. The radio shack is a huge Sirius symbol in and of itself, and it even ties into ep 10x11 “morning star” (Venus/Sirius reference). I’ve never noticed the = symbol and the < symbol behind Daryl. It’s incredible that we can still discover new things in episodes we’ve watched a thousand and one times already.

@twdmusicboxmystery:

One thing I keep circling back to is the Governor because the white, king chess piece was so obviously a symbol for him. And I do think they used that specifically for his arc, but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t a foreshadow of another, bigger, future arc. And there was SO much Beth symbolism around him, especially in 4x06. And his chess piece was white, not black.

@wdway:

I've already gone back and started searching some things and have some ideas that will connect Beth with white and Rick with black symbolically that I'm excited about. I've already solved the problem of the white chess piece connected to the governor and I think you will love my findings.

I was thinking about the gray and Beth’s sweater and Rick's shirt in Coda, when suddenly I remembered that it was not Beth's first sweater. Her first sweater we saw in Still and it was white.

Now, this sweater has been talked about a lot through the years. White typically stands for purity, both in body and in mind and I think you can we can use both for Beth in this example. 

When Beth stands next to the Rich Bitch walker, I think it's a matter of purity of the heart. The Rich Bitch, although outwardly she's in white. she was not a person with a pure heart. What color a person wears on the outside doesn't necessarily reflect in color of their soul. Not all white is good not all black is bad.

Shortly after Beth put on the white sweater, she is covered in blood and she removes it. You would still call it a white sweater, but it has stains that cannot be removed. Her soul will always be white, but she will have strains that cannot be removed. The next time we see her in a sweater it will be a light gray, more white than black. It represents coming to grips in the world that she is in now and will be in the future.

The challenge is, if Beth represents white, what does that mean about the Governor’s white chess piece? We know the Gov was not pure of heart, so how could he be white?

When the Governor originally found the chess board and was teaching Megan the game, he is black. It was Megan that draws that eye patch on the white king because outwardly he seemed to be pure of heart, but he was not. It was an illusion. He was a black king chess piece. So, what about the fact that Rick is black, does that make him a villain? Does he have an evil heart? I believe that Rick has always struggled with his dark demons. It's in the fact that he desires to be noble and good, even though he can do bad things, his desire is pure, to have a white heart.

The next couple of shots was just confirmation that Beth will appear as white and Rick as black. Her shoes from Slabtown. 

One shoelace is white, the other is black. When I went back to look at the shoelaces, for the first time I realized that her shoes are gray. Love that.

This, I'm sure you will recognize as being from Coda, just before the exchange of prisoners. 

I'm always harping about the fact that diamond shape represents Beth, a square represents Rick. You can turn the square on its side, and it becomes a diamond. If you go back and look at the chessboard, it's a huge indication that I'm correct. If you look at the board from one angle it is blocks of squares if you look at it slightly from the side, it's diamonds.

So here, Beth is in the hallway and she will end up standing in the middle of the white diamond on top of the black square. Beth and Rick could have similar but different stories. They’re both in rebel groups, fighting for the same type of cause but in different locations. I think if that's the case, especially with Beth, we could see her appearing to be on the inside, a villain type, but in reality, more of a double agent.

They showed us in Slabtown how she could manipulate and play the game that she had to in order to survive and get what she needed.

This picture is from Dead Weight, from the cabin that the Gov searched. There are a lot of Native American symbols in that cabin and this one stood to me. It is a dreamcatcher.

This next picture is of the room in WHWGO, I'll remind you that on the corner post of the bed is a small dreamcatcher.

I think this links the two episodes together. It's hard to imagine that they would put so much symbolism and foreshadowing all in one episode, so they spread it out over several episodes and seasons. In this bottom shot, we have a black helmet sitting on top of some type of communication equipment, a telescope for gazing at the stars, a poster about science fiction with a rocket on it, a small toy helicopter on the side table. And of course we have the Dreamcatcher which imo is pointing to the next stage of clues. The other things that tie this episode and the Gov's episodes together.

 Hard to get any bigger tie than the Governor himself, surrounded with military and water symbols.

Maybe there is another symbol that could tie this to the past and future storylines. 

A shot of the Gov and Beth together in this room. Even though he is not in this shot, Rick later, at the end of episode, comes into this room. Rick, Beth, and the Gov at some point are surrounded in this room with a helicopter, rockets, airplanes, and a ton of water symbols.

What did I hear you ask? But there are no chess objects? That might be true in a material way, but I believe the conversation between Ty and the Gov was definitely a chess play, a game of strategy, moving back and forth, a power-play of sorts.

So that's all I have for you right now.

@twdmusicboxmystery:

Love all this! When I was putting together my Divine Comedy Theory, I was thinking about AOW (because that’s when we saw the “Abandon all hope…” sign) and that maybe AOW was a type of the CW vs CRM war. Most of the major conflicts probably have been. The fall of the prison. AOW. Certainly TF vs the Whisperers. Maybe even Terminus. This idea is just making me re-think everything. I’m sure if we went back and rewatched, we’d see more clues than ever.

@wdway:

There was one thing that I meant to mention from Live Bait. In the nursing home, we see the woman in the yellow wheelchair. She is wearing a white gown with black trim. She had marks on her feet to make her a Christ symbol figure and we've always connected her with Beth because of the yellow chair.

Now I'm thinking she could represent white/Commonwealth and black/CRM. Because now we not only have Beth as a Christ figure symbol, but we have Rick also. Something that we did not have before the last couple of seasons. It seems easier to connect Beth to the color white. We have been doing that for years and thinking she could be at the Commonwealth and could be a part of Eugene's storyline fits with what could be coming.

Rick is harder when looking to past seasons and connecting him to the color black, but we know for certain that he was taken by the helicopter people and been told by tptb that he is with the CRM. From all that we've seen, their military color is black.

@twdmusicboxmystery:

Just want to point out that in 8x12, The Key, there’s definitely a black theme going on. Rick crashes a black car, 

everything in the basement he and Negan go into is black, Negan is wearing a black coat, 

(I don’t think Rick’s shirt is black, but it’s dark enough to look black here:)

and even the sign, “Abandon All Hope Ye Who Enter Here” is written in black. 

We’ve always knew this was foreshadow of Rick’s disappearance in the helicopter group and it does suggest a black theme.

The other thing I noticed is that in the pic of Beth’s shoelaces, it’s specifically the WHITE lace/shoe was spattered with blood, just like her white sweater in Still. 

So, those two symbols are probably synonymous. I don’t have much to add for how to interpret that beyond what we’ve already said, but it’s interesting. But I guess this is the other thing I was thinking about the Gov’s S4 episodes. And there’s no way to know this for sure. But because we saw Native American stuff in the cabin he stayed in, and also around the Wolves, and both of those are heavily paralleled to Beth, I guess I’m wondering if the Native American stuff will somehow be fulfilled in this CW/CRM war stuff.

@wdway:

I love that you mentioned the blood spatter on Beth's white sweater and the shoe with the white laces. I made note of it and meant to mention it and forgot. Another thing that came to my mind in looking at the Native American stuff in the cabin is it reminded me of Ezekiel in past seasons wearing feathers in his hair. He is now with Eugene and company being held by the Commonwealth and needing medical attention.

I know it may just be wishful thinking but when we first saw the Kingdom it screamed Beth. At Grady, we saw Beth in a medical setting, learning from Dr. Edwards being his assistant which in the dead world is the new form of medical school. Fast forward, if she is with the Commonwealth it would be more than likely in some kind of medical position with the possibility of Beth and Ezekiel meeting. And gives a purpose to the painting of Beth at Hilltop to be recognized by Ezekiel. There's the question of did Eugene see Beth at Grady or was he still unconscious, if so then there again the painting.

@twdmusicboxmystery:

I love the Zeke/feather tie. Side note: I have ALL kinds of head canons of Beth and Ezekiel meeting and swapping stories about Daryl and Carol.

@wdway:

Yes! Can't help but think that Ezekiel, Carol's husband and the love of her life and Daryl's love Beth could possibly meet in the Commonwealth. That this could lead to them all coming together and then torn apart. My headcanon is that something will happen, probably to do with his cancer and Ezekiel will be sent out west and Beth will go with him. I can imagine their first meeting, Elijah keeps looking at Beth asking, do I know you, you look so familiar. And they start talking about the fact that Beth is from Georgia and it all comes together. Please don't let the writers pass up this great opportunity, especially when it seems that they've been setting this up the whole time.

@twdmusicboxmystery:

Yeah for sure! Love that! I’ve always thought about maybe him mentioning that his wife is named Carol. And maybe she doesn’t even think it’s the one she knows bc more than one person can be named Carol, right? But through conversation or more details, just as your head canon above, they realize this is the Carol she knows. Scenes like these would be so much fun!

@frangipanilove:

You guys discussed the blood on Beth’s white cardigan and on the shoe with white laces. It’s actually something I’ve thought about before, though I still don’t know what the most precise interpretation of it should be. But I’ve mentioned that I believe shoe/leg/foot references allude to the trunk of a car (because boot is Australian and British for trunk). Also, I believe that TPTB sometimes use the human trunk to allude to the trunk of a car (the upper body walkers coming out of the back of a car in WHAWGO, the library guy hanging from a bridge that had an x painted on his upper body, Beth’s blue hospital scrubs, Noah’s t-shirt and loads more).

Well, we see Beth get blood spatter on her upper body in Still, and we see the shoe with the white laces get a similar type of blood spatter in Slabtown. These could be trunk references.

How should we interpret it then? I don’t have anything groundbreaking on that. Just that it appears to be further evidence of an injured Beth somehow ending up in the trunk/back of a car. So basically, not anything I didn’t already believe in, but it certainly fits the symbolism language.

That’s pretty much what I have to add to the chess theory for now. As you can see, our conversations can meander and include things like headcanons. (I’d love to tell you we’re all symbolism business all the time, but that’s just not true. ;D). Anyway, hope this gets you all excited for what’s to come. It’s only a theory for now, but as you can see, there’s some pretty compelling evidence. I’ve said for a long time that the show is pointing toward some HUGE conflict in the future, and since Rick disappeared, I’ve known it would be the helicopter people. But until Nonny sent in that ask, I’d never considered that maybe the black and white theme might be pointing to it, too. Awesome!

[mikkock]

Hey hi your murder mystery art is super totally cool and amazing and I'd like to Extra! Extra! hear all about it *rattles bells*

haha wow i cant believe ud ask me THIS! unbelievable! now im gonna have to make a long post!

all info under the cut cause im kind like that ♥

For reasons I felt like making a Fancy Ass murder mystery story, with you know, hella complex secret storylines and everyone having drama and shit, and one person died but the more the story goes the less people care about who did the murder and the more they want tHE JUICY DETAILs. X and Y had an afFAIR you say!!! well that’s thousands time more interesting than that murder that happened, who cares about the culprit its not like any of us are going anywhere anyway! tell me more about the marital issues!

The ultimate Vibes are Clue (the game, ya kno, it had a movie too, and that movie was shot with three different endings -fun fact- so that movie theatres could play one alternatively that way people wouldnt get spoiled or even if they did they would not get the ending they were spoiled or even if all three were spoiled you couldnt know which ending you were getting anyway, big dick move, cause its an old movie and film is expensive, also that movie stupid and campy, ALSO I ONLY LEARNED MAKING THIS AU THAT IN ENGLISH THE GAME’S CALLED “CLUE” wE CALL IT CLUEDO therefore my wip playlist is called cluedo. because. fuck it.)(i just have an emotional attachment to that game i even had a cd rom video game version and it was the spookiest shit for a 6 years old, trust me, i played it so much tho i didnt even understand the rULES i was just making scenarios like gathering the characters in rooms n making conversations outloud cause honestly the banter is the best part of a murder mystery) ANYWAY that sure is a whole paragraph of tangent. 

BUT YE the inspo from the Clue game. you can tell it from the Colours obviously, everyone’s colour codded.(even everyone’s name is colours as well you’ll see it’s real dang fancy! im just remaking that game but with 2932020 characters and more behind the scenes drama and also for gay people.)

So BASIC PLOT!

Sir Belyy, the dude in white, is The Rich Powerful Respected Fancy Boss, and he throws a Fancy Reception Party with his closest friends and associates to celebrate the opening of a new branch of his business. All the lads gather in his wonderful little very isolated mansion in the middle of nowhere, like ok he got a death wish or something or he’s very trusting of his business partners, but not a good move, cause in the middle of the reception, as A Phat Storm Starts (for plot convenience, we going with a campy vibe if you couldnt tell), his body is found, it’s awful, there’s a killer on the loose! All the guests gather, and attempt to maybe contact the authorities, to not avail, since The Storm ya know, phone lines are Broken my dude. Its clear that the culprit is among them, since no one could have entered the house, or left it (cuz once again, ThE sTORm). And then it’s all about interrogating each other, distrust, alliances and betrayal, revealing one’s deepest secrets when they form an alibi and revealing someone else’s deepest secret for they could be a motive! Meanwhile there’s a dead body in the mansion just chillin there. 

.

So as I mentioned, I changed everyone’s name to be colour related (or ya know, food or flowers of that colour cause sometimes a colour in a language would not work as a name given the way names work in that culture all that jazz) which is the trippiest thing cause tHATS NOT YALLS USUAL NAMES but its fun (also changed so many ages hgfhs it was a trip)(still no one’s really old i guess i got boomerphobia). The “Cast” is clearly the most important part, and if ur a True “My OCs” Connaisseur (hdfghd the most useful skill to have, knowing *MY* Charactersdshgd) you may have recognised some faces and can already read some vibes and predict who will be progressing the plot and who will be yelling at people throwing accusations ghdfgd.

(god i wish i hadnt slacked off making the portraits of everyone in that AU i only have 3 tho that’s so sad so ill just make little sketches just cause <3 only text??? i got too many hoes with no attention span for that)

.

Sir BELYY (the one who dIEs lmao)

(bust shot missing the fact that this man is the tallest beefiest lad around)

Intimidating, powerful, composed, wealthy, carries the name of a family who has generations of control to it’s reputation, he’s The Man that hoes who believe in the economy wishes they were. As in, the “self made” man who only just happened to benefit from having a wealthy background to uplift his plans. In his youth, he wanted to prove his worth, seperated himself from his father, started a business, that business became big, then got attached to the family’s business, bam back to square one but with Reputation now. There seemed to be VERY big tension between him and The Father, some speculate it had to do with his unknown mother, and some family drama there, and it never got resolved as old man Belyy died quite young (the jUICY speculations are that current sir Belyy mURDEREd old man sir Belyy, fucked up if true!). People love him though in general, as he has that reputation of “Cold Lad With a Gold Heart” aka he takes people under his wings, donates, doesnt treat his employees like the absolute worst garbage etc... you know, he’s rich and a half decent person, so obviously he’s an angel on earth. But does it matter though, he’s dead! that’s the concept of the story!  

Mr.GRAY (the grey guest)(who could have guessed from the name)

He’s one of Sir Belyy’s oldest employees, and benefits from a high rank in the company. But, sadly for him, he’s been stagnating lately, as newer, youngest employees seem to have Belyy’s favours, and are his prefered associates for important tasks and positions. Therefore he has Some Bitterness, Some Salt, Some Distaste, some unbriddled but professionally muted hatred for Specific people in the company. He can be an antagonistic figure, but the amount of time he spent in Belyy’s circle grants him an immense quantity of information about the man, but mostly, about his business. Anything about the company’s history, dealings, operations, he’s aware of, either having been told of them, or having snooped around to obtain, immune to being questioned due to his legitimacy in the company.

Mr.LIM (the green guest)

Remember when it was said that Gray had beef with some employees cause they were younger and rose to high ranks faster than him and became Belyy’s favourite over him? Yeah well here comes the one he hates the most for that (ofc he’s belyys fave cuz he’s Mine <3) Our lad caught Belyy’s attention for his Exploits in like, em fancy high school tournaments of smart people, it’s a thing its ridiculous, making kids compete on Smart stuff for the pride of their schools n shit, well homie Lim got clout when doing that, and Belyy was extremely interested cause that kid’s main thing was how “this young lad got mad strategic skills tf are u a war general or smth how fancy”, and that’s a coveted skill for ruthless business. So as soon as the kid is an adult, bam, join the company my dude. And because he’s just that Cool n Sexy ofc he met the expectations Belyy had, and old man Belyy got attached cuz it do be such a young lad, a kid, mentally i am adopting. That’s how you get a youngas employee becoming the right hand man of one the phatest CEO in a few years, and even make your way into being a Good Lad on top of a business partner. And that’s how you get Gray to hate your ass too. Now though, fine lad with mad strategic skills, rising to power that fast, and even infiltrating Belyy’s private life? If I were Gray I’d call suspicion there’s surely some shady stuff going no way we’re just dealing with a nice fella who just happens to work good and be friendly to the boss right?

Herra MUSTA (the black “guest”)

Belyy’s newest butler, assistant, house keeper, he multitasks. His family has been tied to Belyy’s for generations, fullfilling roles of help, but also of confidents. He’s been the head butler since only a short time, after his mother passed, and as such is still “in training” you could say, despite having served the family his whole life. There are rumours going around that the contract tying his family to the Belyys may end on his generation and need to be resigned. He known the manor by heart, and carries all keys to any locked room (and mostly, The Master Key, cause in an old house, some doors may be locked beyond all still existing keys). He also knows secrets of the family that no one else knows, but good luck getting em out of him, he’s under contract not to divulge em bro.

Mr. HASSEL (the brown guest)

Belyy’s childhood friend. They grew up together, pictured their dreams together, sworn to flourish together, worked together when starting the company, and then Hassel felt he should create his own thing instead of depending on his friend’s existing wealth, and while Belyy’s business went wild, his never took off. They still stayed very close, despite the massive difference in wealth. Belyy considers him his closest friend, the one person he can trust (fucked if hassel did the murder lemme tell u). So of course, he’s still always invited to the Prestigious meet ups where’s he’s free to feel uncomfortably out of place amongst all the rich and powerful people that he could have been a part of had he had a tiny bit of luck and a small loan from a wealthy relative...People LOVE saying he’s still hanging out with Belyy so much to leech off his wealth, cause of course they do! His bestie status means he has a whole different brand of information of Belyy than his butler does, the Most Intimate Stuff, the Childhood Stuff. The Juicy stuff ya kno...But Bro Code, its all secrets...

Sir RUZH (the red “guest”)

Deep dive into Belyy’s personnal history, the man has many employees working at his house keeping it working, clean, ya know the vibe. They live on the premice, one has a kid who’s just a Joy to be around, all the employees just vibe with that lad, he’s just a born socialite you know? Belyy gets to meet the kid, and also hella vibes with him. And because human are influenced by their feelings, he gives the kid’s mum a bit of a preferencial treatment, in the tasks she fullfils and all, til he gives her an important-as mission, and then there’s an accident n mama dies, and now Belyy got guilt and there’s this kid who just Vibes. So naturally the move is to take the kid in, and play on how his vibes are just so clean, and raise him to be the Perfect Entertainer for guests, bam, its soft power propaganda, if everyone loves your now son’s vibes, they associate them with you too. And also that’s kind of a clean rep, the selfless man who adopted his employee’s son to not have him fall to the streets, how heartwarming. Not at all traumatising for the kid too I bet! But anyway now the lad is just the most charming young adult, mission accomplished. He’s always present at any reception, ready to work his people-pleasing magic, and then going back to a gigantic empty manor to wait for the next and curate the perfect vibes to meet the expectations of dad. On the plus side, he knows everyone, and those who don’t know him cannot wAIT to, he’s just got that aura ya know. People skills for miles, and the insider knowledge that comes with being the son of the CEO, all this hidden behind the personna of the fresh innocent bashful party lad. 

Dr.FEN (the pink guest)

Do not get mistaken by the title, he’s no doc, he will not diagnose you with anything, he just studied long enough to get the sexy title. Study in what? Haha. Nothing shady. Just toxicology. He’s a world reknown poison expert basically, that’s his main thing. Oh but don’t worry, of course studying substances that may kill people is only for finding out how to cure them from it of course. What brings him in this circle? Simple, Belyy may or may not have started to suffer some weird illness that no doctor has been able to find the source, let alone cure, of. Him and Dr.Fen had met previously on some event, cause some rich man also love flexing how smart they are and attending sciencey shit, and he was contacted as sort of a shot in the dark. The lad does know how to treat some things, maybe he can treat The Mysterious Unwellness, since no traditional doctor was able to. He knows science, he’s trustworthy, bam, you’re hired to work on My Case Exclusively. Thanks to this, Dr.Fen has access to the whole health history of Belyy and his family, to many mANY dangerous substances, and also has The Respect of the hoes at the party. He HAS a doctorate after all. Epitome of knowledge. And he’s a kind to people and he wears pink like dang how can you nOT pour your wHOLE trust in him. 

Sir MOREVITCH (the blue guest)

Youngest son of an affluent family, who used to be close the the Belyys. The two families fell slightly appart after the death of the previous head of the family on the Belyy side, as they do nOT vibe with the current one (well current, til the first night of the story ig). But, unbeknownst to all, one strong link had been kept, between the youngest of the Morevitch, who dislikes his family and wishes to emancipate himself from them while also assuring his depart will not throw him basically in the streets, and our beloved Sir Belyy, who also dislikes the Morevitches but loves to see the rebellious energy of the young one (and ya know, my enemy’s enemy’s my friend or however you say that). So Belyy’s basically offering tips and helping Morevitch plant himself safely out of his family’s grasp, but it’s all taking quite some time isn’t it, slow and steady is fine until your parents try to arrange a wedding to secure more political power, and suddenly it is all quite urgent that you escape that situation because No Thank You Parents I Do Not Want A Wife I’m Too Young And Also Huh <3 Stuff You Won’t Like Hearing For Sure <3. The people who know they’re working together also know that it’s a big point of argument between them, the difference in vision between “you have to go slow and steady to be safe” and “I have very limited time to get to that safety anyway so I gotta risk it” “hell no you cant i can’t follow through if we’re going that quick that’ll put me at risk and you’re family’s gonna send gunmen to take me down”. A mess, it’d be much quicker to just obtain a few million bucks out of nowhere and bolt for sure...

Mr.GANG (the orange guest)

Morevitch’s trusted assistant. He hears the concerns, he helps the secret businesses, he lies to the parents about the whereabouts, and mostly, he’s basically a budget spy. The lad got that talent where people just don’t notice him popping behind them and catching all their dirty laundry as they confess it to someone they trust, and he always manages to break into places, get the intel he was looking for, and escape, putting everything back into place as if no one was ever there (wonder where he got all those skills from damn!). But what he’s even better at is being sneaky not only to benefit his boss, but himself as well <3. If he can catch all the info in the world, go any places, nothing’s stopping him from playing double agent and also going behind Morevitch’s back. After all the assistant life isn’t the most glamourous and rewarding, who can blame him from going and using his talents to build his own little exit route, right? Everybody sort of knows he cannot be trusted, but also no one managed to really incriminate or stop him, and as much as he has tea on many people, no has it on him, but bet once found that would be heeeella juicy.

M.MOUTARDE (the yellow guest)(this one is straight up the name of the yellow player in the french edition of clue too when i say its my main vibe)

Moutarde was an influential celebrity. He had a big break acting in a movie that the whole country stanned so hard they basically turned the script into their national anthem (they would have if it was a true democracy where the people really decide), he was so handsome and elegant, everyone’s dream husband. And then the fame fiddled out because it’s how fame is, one moment you’re the sexiest dish on the table and the next someone brings in dessert and baam, its all about that fresh cake, and no one pays any mind to your delightful aroma anymore, you’ve gone cold, they had a bite, their interest is somewhere else. Belyy really admires his work though, and mostly finds his image fits with the brand of his company, therefore the two are working on a collaboration to make Moutarde a representative. This WOULD boost Moutarde’s reputation, for his ads would be displayed on every imaginable surface of the country, and it would also benefit the company cause being represented by thAT sexy motherfucker? clearly that’s a deal. The freshness of the partnership means Moutarde is a newcomer in the guests, a fresh face, with no reputation, no relationships, no unfair biases against him. He’s just the new handsome charismatic lad with a squeaky clean image. Emphasis on “image”. After all, no one really knows anything of his background, right?

Kun.LAWENDER (the purple guest)

Private investigator, very useful to be around at a party it’s almost like it was expected there’d be a body to investigate, he’s a very close associate of Belyy, as there’s nothing more important to business than investigating the rivals and finding dirt on them to make them fall through infamy. He’s not exactly the PI who goes look for justice to be served, he’s just here for cash bro. He’s got intel on everyone, and will only let it out if offered the right thing in return (money, or sometimes other pieces of very secret intel, trade is good). Wouldn’t advise letting him and Gang team up tbh but they probably wouldnt, as Lawender is really more of a lone wolf player, going on his own for himself. The one thing that negates his usefulness as a PI on an accidental crime of scene is that even if he knew the whole truth of the event he would not spit it out unless he benefitted from saying it. He sure is a polarising lad, but at the same time, an untouchable one, he’s too knowledgeable to be taken down. Rather than sneaky, he’s extremely observant, noticing the tiniest details and engraving them in his memory, ready to be linked up to other details to deduct the big picture. He’s the upfront tea gathered basically (as opposed to Gang’s shadow tea gathering if you will, they are similar forces but using opposite methods)(also one of em got a licence n the other does not hAH).

~~~~

Now the secrets, all of em have them. One of em at least got the secret of having KILLED Belyy that’s that. But that’s to be kept for later (for if i ever use this story for more than daydream material gfhjgh) bet you can imagine what some of em may be just out of Knowing what i do, from having seen the characters in other contexts, or just because you’re a genius and reading the character profiles immediatly lit up the bulbs in your head forming the perfect theory, props to you, mad genius.

Honestly my thoughts are just how lit of a game that would be, you get to pick one hoe (maybe sum are locked til u find their secrets for juicy purposes) and you do your invetigation using your character’s perks and disadvantages, and maybe there could even be Multiple scenarios and outcomes, to spice it up, give replay value, i just think it’d be a game id spend hours on. tryin to get the spicy details of everyone’s life. walking around n digging through a rich man’s stuff, witnessing the drAMA of people fighting cause they’re locked in with a murderer and that’s stressful ngl. That or a long ass show @ netflix wanna give me a show maybe? give me hella budget we’re making it animated cause im too cultured for live action. 

whatever i make of it though, i hope i can make this story Flourish, just so that i can lay down all those secret backstories i’ve written. i want the satisfaction of throwing out the craziest secret drama between character n seeing peeps loose their minds, it just is a tasty experience.

also i gotta say, i plug the hell out of Clue for an inspo but when i was building the basics of the story my mind immediatly went “oH MY GOD THE VIBES,, THE BACKSTABBING AND tEAMING UP and all,,, its The Genius, that one tv show where peeps have to do the wildest games that require strategy n they’re in that fancy set that looks like a rich ppl mansion oh god the vibes” so yeah, i rewatched the whole first two seasons cause they’re my faves and that had an impact if only minimal in the aesthetic.

Anyway hope that quick presentation gave you a lil taste of the story, and maybe,,,, got you curious,,, craving to learn more like you never did before (im exaggerating the only real question we all got is just “so who’s fuckin with whom then how many of yall secretly dating” this the real deal)

[secretsfromwholecloth]

Deadfire, day 10.

It’s a little odd to hear Edér in the DLCs occasionally address the Watcher as “Watcher”. I don’t remember him doing that much if at all before.

I don’t know why I didn’t get the quest to fetch the Titan’s Heart at the same time as all the others, but I guess I’m taking an extra trip back to Neketaka. Well, if there’s any way to get the thing without being caught stealing and having to murder everyone in Wakoyo’s office, this is the playthrough to discover it.

Answer: I thought there wasn’t and I would just have to get murdering, but then I stole the thing and didn’t get caught? Huh. I’ll take it!

Either rogues are ridiculously powerful or I’m getting less bad at the combat in this game, because so far the fights I was afraid of and kicked down the difficulty for have been hilariously, “maybe I ought to try them on Relaxed next time” easy. Mind, I’ll probably regret all my life choices if I actually do that.

So, stick around to level up people’s soulbound gear a bit more? Yeah, I think so. Nice of the game to make all the arena fights repeatable.

This is the first playthrough where I bothered using traps, so I only just now got the achievement for using five of them. Which is the last one I’m ever likely to get, looking at what’s left.

Either Edér is impervious to just about everything or I’m picking the wrong fights, because his shield needs him to get hit with afflictions to level up, and it’s not going very quickly.

All right, Anlaf and Konstanten are done with their pieces, and Edér will have plenty more opportunities. Time to pack it in and get started on The Forgotten Sanctum.

If you heard a faint squeeing noise just now, that was me.

Sadly for me, with a Watcher with no support abilities, I can’t bring both Rekke and Aloth along; one of them will have to cede their spot to a healer. So which will it be? Neither is the star of the DLC, but they both got a lot of love from it; Aloth got a lot of attention in the early and mid-game but hasn’t been in the party for a while now, whereas I just had Rekke along for much of BoW and all of SSS, but that was the first time I actually used him. You know what, I think I’ll keep Rekke, and our new and improved ranged-weapon-using Xoti can be the healer. I don’t think I’ve ever brought her along for TFS—even Oriol tore himself from her side to get Rekke, Fassina, and Aloth into the party.

Grinning all through Tayn’s introductory conversation, as usual. I like Tayn. He’s the same kind of fuckup I am, just slightly less of one.

Oh gods, the drug trip. Edér and Rekke’s lines are classic, but I do wish Fassina had something to say for herself there.

I’d say Tayn and Edér need to be friends, but no, they absolutely do not need to be friends. There’s no way that ends well for Eora.

Is...oh no. Xoti? Are you starting a screaming argument with Edér? Is that what this is?

Oh. No, this isn’t a screaming argument, this is something entirely different. Xoti, you said you were over him. Was that a lie to try and get Anlaf into your bunk, or did you get over him and then get un-over him? (There’s a pun in here somewhere about getting under him, but the whole point of this exchange is that she hasn’t and wants to.)

You know, 27-year-old Xoti calling 37-year-old Edér “a little old” is an absolutely valid opinion, but my experience and the norms of my ethnic community right on up to my mother’s generation leave me eyebrowing a bit. (Disclosure: I’m 36 myself, which may or may not be influencing my view of this.)

I’m just going to sit here and have feelings about the presence of the “Hands off. Edér’s mine.” option, though Anlaf certainly won’t be taking that one. (Clelia and Eiheune never got this conversation, but even if they had, that wouldn’t have been their reaction—Clelia would’ve whistled for the rest of the OT4 to witness the possible new addition to the polycule, and Eiheune would’ve shrugged and been like, that’s between you two, I’ll talk to him about it later.)

I’m very bad at portraying romance, yes. But I’m far worse at portraying monogamy.

The “Have you shown him your...charms?” option? No. No, don’t. She’ll actually go and do it. Possibly right here in front of two archmages, three imps, the rest of the party, and a bunch of mysterious tentacles.

Xoti’s story about trying to catch him half-asleep and then get him drunk into the bargain to lower his resistance = XOTI NO. Her getting a couple of approval bumps from Edér for telling it in a jokey way is just the icing on the fucked-up cake here.

And you know, I gave her enough time with Maia that they started throwing up romance banters, so I officially wash my hands of Xoti’s love life.

Anyway. I was heading to the Archives before I got sidetracked, right? Right.

...no, I apparently do not have a sufficiently ridiculous Mechanics score to pick the lock without dispelling the illusion first.

I’ve got some feelings about the note from Galven Regd about how everything we know about the War of Black Trees is a lie.

And some very different feelings about the manual for the flesh construct controller. If there’s one part of this series that’s ripe for kinkshaming, it’s this DLC. :D

I’m letting Rekke knock over all the book piles, because he seems to find it funniest out of everyone in the party. You’re welcome, kiddo.

I’m going to pronounce “Llengrath” with initial /ɬ/ and no one can stop me.

Oh, the mycelium in the Central Stacks. “The fungus shivers at your blow. Possibly in pleasure.” Yep, kinkshaming time.

The only inconvenient thing about giving Xoti a ranged weapon is that she hangs back too far from the front lines for her Circle of Protection to cover the melee squad. Protecting Fassina is better than nothing, but still.

Do you really think I’m not going to lick the runes when given the opportunity?

Sure, Rekke, go ahead and lick them too if you want.

So, Xoti, that Waidwen’s a cutie, isn’t he? The sort you might write erotic fiction about if you were that way inclined? You, uh, wouldn’t know anything about this book here, would you?

I can’t read “A True and Accurate Account of the Ten’s Final Stand” without having it in the back of my mind that Edér was 17 when the Godhammer went off. Seventeen! Imagining him as a skinny kid with only one-third of a clue what he’s doing, becoming Divine King of the Dyrwood or whatever the fuck and going to his death on that bridge...yeesh, it’s painful enough to think about Waidwen, who was at least a grown man when it all went down.

Oh, hello, fungus Llengrath. Ahem. It’s rude to stare, you know. Even if the eyeball falls off and rolls away afterwards.

Fyonlecg, I do enjoy listening to your VA, but you’re being very tedious right now. You and your creepy remote-controlled worm body.

The archmages’ opining on the Hand Occult falls squarely into Does This Remind You Of Anything territory, heh.

I love hearing Concelhaut complaining about everything. And you can’t do a godsdamned thing about any of it, you horrible old skull.

And I’m just going to sit here and have a metric fuckton of feelings about Bekarna, while I’m at it.

And there’ll be more fun stuff in the morning, it’s rather late.

[bbangjaes]

omg writing this one gave me mad feels

i hope you like it, thanks for the request!

-mik

SF9 SCENARIO: Helping Their S/O Fall Asleep

Youngbin:

I feel like Bin-Bin would be v v v v caring as a boyfriend in general and, when you couldn’t sleep, he would do everything in his power to help you get rest bc he cared about you a lot (and he wouldn’t want to deal with a cranky gf the next day lmao). He would crawl into bed with you and wrap you up in his arms with your head against his chest. He would stroke your hair or rub your back to help you calm down and boy would you be #lovinit. I also feel lke he would be really warm ?????? so he’d feel like a human blanket and you would be oh so comfy and soft and in heaven so you’d fall asleep super easily in your little Youngbin cocoon (*screams* i feel like he is such cuddler and i love cuddling so much so i’m really struggling rn).

Inseong:

Though he is a crusty little shit, he’d be such a softie with you if you needed help falling asleep. I can totally see him cuddling you and *heaves* singing you to sleep. This actual soft angel boy would hold you all close and sing you some really pretty lullaby or song that would have you dozing off in no time at all (u might also cry bc holy shit this would be a moment). Once you fell asleep, he’d stop singing and carefully give you a lil kiss on your forehead bc 1) fuck yeah, forehead kisses and 2) he was high-key pumped that he succeeded in putting you to sleep with his smooth vocals (i also see him grinning really big to himself bc he’s also cocky af).

Jaeyoon:

Much like Inseong, I feel like our honey voice Jaeyoon would sing you to sleep. He would be very sad and worried about you if you couldn’t fall asleep and would quickly formulate a plan to get his beautiful baby some beauty rest (yo this boy would be on a mission). He would wrap you up in blankets and spoon you while he serenaded you with a v sweet love song (holy moly i am having so many feelings just imagining this lord help me). Oh my would you be so very comfy and relaxed and content with such a lovable boyfriend and would have no trouble at all falling asleep anymore.

I LOVE THIS GIF WHAT A LIFE-RUINING CUTIE

Dawon:

This boy is so damn loud that I wouldn’t be surprised if he was the cause your sleeplessness (like srsly when is he not screaming or yelling lmao i swear to god i love him tho). When it came down to it though, he would try his very best to help his lovebug get some sleep bc sleep is v important who doesn’t love sleep amiright ladies (yo fuck that, sleep is for the weak haha i’m so sleep-deprived rn help me). This honey bun would become a human pillow in order to maximize full comfiness capabilities. Or, in other words, would put on super soft clothes and let you rest your pretty little head on him while he held you close like his most prized possession (yeah yeah i know you’re not a possession/object blah blah i’m just trying to emphasize how much he treasures u damn it). But yeah he’d basically embody the spirit of all things comfy to help you fall asleep and that shit would work like a charm.

Zuho:

YOOOOOOOO ZUHO WOULD BE THE SOFTEST OF THE SOFT. I can see this sweetie being v calm and caring if you needed him to help you fall asleep. He would get into bed with you and wiggle under the covers so that he was super duper close to you bc personal space ???????? that shit is overrated. I imagine him talking to you extra sweetly while he adjusts his position to wrap you up in his long noodle arms and making sure that you are comfy (YALL IM FLASHING BACK TO THIS POST BC HIS VOICE WOULD BE SO SLEEPY IM WEAK). I feel it in my heart of hearts that Baek Juho would be just a complete and total sweetheart and would make you feel so loved and safe and thoroughly believe that it would be near impossible to have trouble falling asleep with this man holding you. Peace. End of story. *drops mic*

Rowoon:

THIS POOR MOM WOULD BE SO DISTRAUGHT IF YOU COULDN’T SLEEP. Seokwoo would be the embodiment of all things stressed tf out bc he would always be nagging you about getting enough sleep, eating nutritious food, taking good care of yourself, etc. He would try giving you a glass of warm milk or some shit like that to help you falll asleep but it wouldn’t work and he would be back to square one. When the frazzled mom ran out of options, he’d finally just cuddle you (i’m laughing so hard bc he would be so clueless and wouldn’t realize that cuddling is always the solution poor thing). Our giant man-baby would wrap you up in a little Rowoon burrito and you would be really really comfy and it would just be really great (well damn it now i’m hungry bc i wrote the word burrito).

Taeyang:

This boyfriend would be v v v v v v v soft and sweet if his boo couldn’t sleep. He would make sure that you had enough blankets and pillows and would ask if you wanted to sleep in a shirt of his or something illegally cute like that (i’m drowning in the feels bc he would be such a sweet lil bun). He would cuddle you and hum some pretty-sounding nonsense that would be oddly pleasing and soothing to help you relax. IDK WHY BUT I JUST IMAGINE HIM STROKING YOUR HAIR  AND LIKE PLAYING WITH IT BETWEEN HIS FINGERS AND SHIT (lms if u too like it when ppl play with ur hair bc i think it’s the best thing since sliced bread). Yo he’d be extremely soothing and so sweet that you would practically get a damn cavity and you would not struggle in the least to fall alseep thanks to your boyfriend Tae.

Hwiyoung:

Have no fear, Hwiyoung is here. This needy little cuddle monster would be more than ready to save the day and cuddle you into submission bc I honestly feel like this boy’s true calling is cuddling for some reason. He would be the cutest little puppy and would practically pounce on you bc he would want to get in bed with you A.S.A.P. He would snuggle you so close to him and would make sure that there was no part of you left untouched by his softness (ok that might sound a lil dirty but i promise that, for once, it was not intended that way lmao). Oh me oh my you would be in heaven bc Hwi is low-key a cuddle master and the true definition of cuddly (like seriously i imagine him being a complete cuddle god). Let’s just say that your sleeplessness would be no match for this boyfriend.

Chani:

I KNOW I SAY THAT THEY ARE ALL REALLY SOFT BOYFRIENDS N SHIT BUT I SWEAR TO GOD THAT CHANI IS HANDS-DOWN THE SOFTEST BOYFRIEND OF ALL. *takes a deep breath* Okay, I’m ready. I genuinely feel like Chani is the type to fall really hard for a girl and that you would mean the literal world to him if you were his girlfriend (idk why but i just see him being head-over-heels when he is in love with someone) so if you had any type of problem, he would try v hard to make you happy. If you couldn’t fall asleep, he would sort of just casually slip into bed with you and lay so that you two were face-to-face with your foreheads touching and the he’d look down like a shy little bean and talk to you about the weather or something random bc why the fuck not. I can also see him playing with your hands and doing that thing where you sort of rub your thumb around in a circle and it’s just really soothing and cute and UGH (yo i just imagine chani being super fascinated with hands i’m not really sure why). Ok this getting really long now but what the fuck did you expect from a Chani stan. But I just see you two giggling and chatting until you both fall asleep and your worries would just vanish and you would get some good ass sleep. THE END.

(yes wow look at that quality gif made by yours truly)