#HHRRRNHGHRNRHGGGRRRR
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I'm so. So normal. About. This. *Chewing on furniture*
Ughhh, today I spent the entire day thinking about spidervenomâŚ!
I unfortunately have too many wips to work on anything with them now (plus, this week was full of Bad Days⢠for meâŚ), but I thought I might share a wip that has been gathering dust in my folder for a loooooong time now! The title is â5 times when Peter and Eddie didnât kiss (and one time they held hands)â and itâs based on this idea that with the reality being rewritten so that Peter technically never married MJ (âOne more dayâ was the name of that storyline in the comicsâŚ??) he instead has space to develop feelings toward Venom and this is a bunch of moments, mostly following the canon events, depicting their shifting relationship with each other.
Their first kiss wasn't, technically, a kiss. A tease, maybe. Definitely a joke. But a kiss...? Peter wasn't sure if he counted it (Eddie did, though). Simply speaking, he went too far with his comedy routine this time, got too caught up in his banter and mock-flirting. Laughing at the Symbiote's infatuation with him, not treating it as something serious, using it as the butt of the jokes. "You need to get over me, this is getting seriously embarrassing" and such and so on.
And obviously, the never dying "Alright, let's kiss and make up!", Once he webbed them up, after sending them crashing through a wall. It wasnât a kiss, really. He had a mask on, after all. Venom's maw was sealed shut with the webbing as well. It wasn't a kiss.
Until it almost was, because when he leaned away, blank white eyes were wide with bewilderment, and the monster in front of him grew still and silent. He laughed awkwardly, breath tripping over his throat. "Aw, look at you getting flustered over a little smooch!", he quipped, eager to get away. Snap of a wrist and he was gone, not a single glance back left. He remembered feeling angry at Venom for making it weird and at himself, for feeling angry at all. It was stupid, almost as stupid, as feeling guilty over it.
There was no reason for telling this to MJ, right? She wouldn't want to hear about his heroic escapades anyway. Especially not if they involved Venom, even if they would be presented as a punchline, a pathetic loser, wincing in ridiculously parodied expression of disgust. Because it could have been disgust. Venomâs face was covered and their eyes werenât exactly the most easy to read. Common sense prompted they were repulsed by the very idea of their âarch-nemesisâ kissing them, even presented as a harmless joke. Thatâs why, there was no need to mention this to MJ. Telling her would mean agreeing with the insane thought that there was anything important to tell. And there was not. There was no reason to feel guilty.
Because this wasnât a kiss.
There was another time, though, that could have been a kiss. Should have been, maybe. Anyway, that was what Peter thought now, looking back. It was a kiss he never got, but, at the moment, needed. Only at the moment, he would have regretted it so much afterwards.Â
Thatâs why Eddie was glad of the absence in its place. It would have added so much more wrongness to a memory already filled with a sense of misplacement and dissonance. Because, well, they really were out of place at Peterâs flat. He knew it, and Peter knew it, and the Symbiote knew it, maybe the most painfully of either of them. But there was nowhere else they could go, they needed a shelter and an ally. And Peter wasnât really the type of person who would close doors in the face of the wounded and vulnerable. Even if the wounded in question tried to eat him a few times in the past and was now ruining his carpet with green drool. Which didnât mean he was going to take it without complaining a little. Or a lot.
âGreat, just great, whenever I think my bad luck finally achieved its peak, itâs âSurprise! Think again!â,â he wailed to himself, as he helped them to the couch. âTo go from sharing an apartment with the most beautiful woman a guy could ever imagine dating, to hosting a slimy monstrosity - that has to be a new record of misery reached in a week!â
âA girl has left you? Thatâs what youâre worrying about?â Eddie snarled at him, his anger equally fueled by the necessity of relying on their foe and the needles of jealousy bleeding through the bond. âCarnage is out there, changing this god forsaken city in his own butchershop and you cry after a girl?!â
âFirst of all, I wouldn't say âleftâ is exactly the right word to describe it,â he huffed. âWe needed a break, thatâs all. Happens sometimes in relationships, not that you would know anything about that.â
They rolled their eyes. The very idea that Peter could have anything worth competing with a shadow of their symbiosis was vastly ridiculous.
âWe donât care about your private life, Parkerâ, Eddie said, as they tried to settle on the couch in a position that would do the least damage to their bruised ribs. âOnly whether or not youâll join us once we recover our strength. Why, afterward, you can return to crying your eyes out, be our guest.â
Seeing Peter from this close felt weird, especially, since he appeared to indeed cry his eyes out barely seconds ago. Something squeezed Eddieâs heart at the notion, his Other, he assumed, must have curled around it, disturbed by proximity. He wanted Peter to just leave them alone, shut up, and let them sleep. This small room will surely be uncomfortable enough even without his presence around.
âAnd what if I wonât?â Peterâs voice was bitter, though there was no sense of intention in it, that is, one beyond getting on Venomâs nerves. âMaybe MJ is right, maybe I should sit this one out. Have some âme timeâ. Catch up with tv series. Bake cupcakes. Maybe I donât want to, I donât know, have my life ruined over and over again, because some freaks decided to go on a rampage!â
Before he could react, they grabbed him by his collar, tugging close, to shoot with a look of utter resentment.
âListen chucklehead,â a low growl vibrated through their whole torso, settling on Peterâs face like icy dew, âJoke like this once more, and weâll eat your spleen, got it?â
Words were followed by a curse, as they grabbed on their wound, bothered by the sudden movement.
âWell, if arenât you mister persuasive, where did you learn such diplomatic demeanor-?â Peter tried barking back, supporting himself over the couchâs back. But the last part of the sentence stumbled over his throat and ended in a whine. From the few inches that separated them, they could see the threat of tears glistening in his eyes. Before they could fall out, he ran a hand over his face, covering the glimpse of emotions with irritation. âWhat did you even do to yourself? Should you bandage those or something?â
That felt terribly inadequate.
All of this felt unnatural to them, all of them. Not the banter, spite and anger, of course not. But everything accompanying them was off by a mile. No masks to hide faces, no punches and jaws clenching to tear limbs. This⌠this was too normal, too everyday-ish, too vulnerable for both of them.
âMy Other should be able to close it up overnight,â Eddie mumbled. âIt looks worse than it feels. Nonetheless, we still request your assistance.â
âI know, I knowâŚâ Peter sighed, bending closer, to get a better look at his chest. âWhat a wonderful profession heroism is, at first it was the papers, then the common people, but now even my villains are giving me lecturesâŚâ
The moment was laced with alarm, and surprise, and wrongness, so much wrongness. They werenât used to being this close to each other, not without a clawed hand safely locked on the neck, or webbing fastening said claws to a wall. Peter looked up and the longer they were caught in the misplacement of it all, the worse it got. Because Eddie could feel his Other flowing close to the skin, almost pushing at it, conflicted between its hatred for Peter and yearning to be closer. Because Peter could feel the warmth of Eddieâs body and he felt so painfully human at the moment, beaten up and a bit upset, with just a splinter of fear dug in the pupils.
Eddie licked his lips.
Peter swallowed down.
And he was so lonely right now, so helpless and freshly torn open, so well aware that once tomorrow he would leave to fight, because of course he would, he would return bruised and bleeding, maybe wonât return at all, andâŚ
Peter leaned in.
Just when Eddie leaned away.
Peter went to the kitchen right after, jumping up from the couch with energetic babble about having to change his bandages and how Eddie is not allowed to touch anything and how if he catches him messing up his books then, well, Peter might not be able to eat his spleen, but heâs creative enough to come up with something else.
The moment passed and it was for the best.
After that, they didnât really work together for a while. Well, there was that one time in the court. But aside from that, Peter and Venom mostly were on their own ways, only occasionally clashing. And then, Eddie and his Other were both on their own ways too. He didnât really monitor what was happening to him afterward. Partly because his own life was, as usual, in shambles. Partly because seeing Eddie like that, sick and broken, stripped of the anger to hide behindâŚ
He tried to do better and that was all that mattered, really.Â
But then Anti-Venom appared. And surely enough, he was still trying. That was one thing Peter had to give to him. He also brought to mind a vision of a healing injury, with bones fused all wrong, festering. It was as if Eddie finally took a step back from one kind of madness, after which he jumped head first into one just as deep and unhealthy, just neatly tweaked here and there.Â
This kiss would have been the most feverish one. As well as the one Peter was the most grateful that it never came to happen.
The whole experience screamed âfeverâ, honestly. Oozed illness.What made it worse, was that it did make sense for Eddie to act this way. To swing back, so hard, from one direction to another. Who else, if not Eddie, would have come up with an idea that the best course of action to convince Peter that heâs all better now, âon the side of angelsâ and not crazy at all, would be to kidnap him? What he didnât expect was the talk about friendship, along with the overfamiliarity. Then again, there was always this tension between them, wasnât it? Flirting in the background of a deadly battle.
And that was what he was doing then too. Old habits die a slow and painful death, only to be zombified back to life, don't they?
âWhat would you think of me, if Iâd let you take my mask off on a first date?â, he quipped, to Eddieâs dismay, as he struggled to peel the cloth anywhere above his mouth.
âYou act like Iâm Electro or Sandman. Iâm on your side now!â, he huffed.
One of his claws strayed from its place, lingering for a moment over Peterâs lips, leaving his body frozen dead.
Oh no, he wouldnât, blinked in his head before the monster in front of him hesitantly crouched down. Orange eyes were unreadable, and yet, there was an air of uncertainty, something just a step away from⌠what exactly? Peter refused to pinpoint.
Before, though, he even began to figure out what in the hell he would tell Carlie, Eddie backed down.
â...I get it.â His voice, although still changed by the slime covering him, got a softer quality now, with a tingle that paired with anybody else could pass for embarrassment. âI need to earn your trust. And I will.â
Later, he thought that perhaps this time it was Eddie who really needed that particular kiss. But he couldnât have given it to him. He just couldnât.Â
Right?
#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#Im fine. Im cool. Just dandy. Real swell#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#HHRRRNHGHRNRHGGGRRRR#Clawing biting tearing flesh sobbing#This is so friggin good holy shit im buzzinggg#The teasing the tension THE FEELS#These idiots istg#Peter âthis intimate teasing surely means nothing haha why do i feel so weird must be feverâ Parker#Peter âi just got dumped and this wounded animal of a man and my ex are bleeding on my couch and i feel like commiting a sinâ Parker#Eddie and Symby just... just... AUGHHH#Love love love the dialogue! Its so them and the snark is unmatched!#Like this had me so hooked from the start i was already loving it to bits#But then. BUT THEN!!!#âBut then Anti-Venom appearedâ#I get fuckin KOed#Sweet darling are you trying to end meeeeeee#No no im fine. Really. Totally not running around yelling or scratching the walls what gave you that idea#Im not hyperventilating you are hyperventilating#Holy FUCK#âThe whole experience screamed âfeverâ honestly. Oozed illness.â Yeah thats an accurate description of how i feel about Anti-Venom too heh#Just... the theme i love about him so much... the cure entwined with sickness... i am unwell...#âHe also brought to mind a vision of a healing injury with bones fused all wrong festering.â#âIt was as if Eddie finally took a step back from one kind of madnessâ#âafter which he jumped head first into one just as deep and unhealthy just neatly tweaked here and thereâ#âTo swing back so hard from one direction to another.â#YES!! YESSS!!! THIS!! ALL OF THIS!!! YOU GET IT!!!! IM RATTLING YOU!!!!#âOld habits die a slow and painful death only to be zombified back to life don't they?â God this sentence hit me lika brick#đSMOOCHđTHEđMARSHMALLOWđ#DO IT YOU COWARD!!!
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