#Glee. Laughter. Excitement. The excitement of someone who's planning a WONDERFUL gift and can't wait to see the reaction of the receiver

[thegreenleavesofspring]

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So I discovered today, by virtue of our electric unceremoniously cutting off, that my husband has not paid the utility bill in - guessing from the amount owed - three or four months, without informing me or transferring it to my name.

In an example of truly Providential timing, I got paid today and had just enough to cover the arrears. Because he had not paid it and did not live here, they permitted me to close his account and open it in my own name if I paid his outstanding balance.

The rest of my bills are paid and we do not stand in dire need of anything that we must get before I next get paid. I am inconvenienced and annoyed and I'll admit, it was a rough couple of hours earlier, but overall -

I see God's fingerprints all over this.

You see, (I think I've mentioned this before,) I had prayed quite desperately, back in 2021, for liberation from my husband. Complete liberation. I was raised in the school of thought that said divorce was only for infidelity and anything else, including abuse, was a sin. But I was so desperate to be free, I was so unceasingly miserable and afraid.

This year has been quite hard in many ways. I have faced down plenty of challenges, financial and logistical and otherwise.

I do not relish a new bill to have to pay.

And yet.

Is this not the freedom and deliverance I have prayed for? Is God not giving me more control over my own life, freeing me from Dallas? I am no longer dependent on his mercy for my income. For my children's necessities. For internet and phone service. Now for utilities.

Every single time God has cut a tie holding me to my husband, the boat has rocked. I have freaked out (more or less, depending.) And yet - and yet - we have not capsized. He has held us in the palm of His hand. He has borne us through the storm.

How can I but trust Him?