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#GODDAMNN I H8 BING THE ONLY PERSON IN THIS HOUSE WHO CAN EXPRESS EMOTIONS & NOT LET THEM EFFECT HOW I VIEW THE OTHER
pup-pee
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2 days
Text
my father telling me how scared he was when i ran away from the house but i cant express how scared i was 2 b in the house
hey, whats up w/that?
#whenever we ‘hang out’ he likes 2 make the topic as depressing as possible by always talking abiut the past
#& it is the most annoying shit ever i will not lie BC I DONT WANT 2 TALK ABOUT DEATH & THE ABUSE EVERY TIME I SPEAK 2 U
#yk? thag makes sense in my head
#anyways he started talking abiut how terrified he was when i had ran away multiple times a couple yrs ago & when i say a couple i mean
#i have no idea how long ago bc memory is a bitch
#but it had 2 b like middle school - sophmore?
#multiple times & like i just wanna shake him bc LITERLLY WHAT & WHO DO U THINK I WAS RUNNING AWAY FROM
#GODDAMNN I H8 BING THE ONLY PERSON IN THIS HOUSE WHO CAN EXPRESS EMOTIONS & NOT LET THEM EFFECT HOW I VIEW THE OTHER
#‘oh u ran in the park u ran in the park’ i didnt run in the fuckinggppaaarrkrkkkk AAAAAAAAAA I MET A NICE LADY WHO HAD A GOAT IN THE
#SPARTMENTS I FRIECIENTED OFTEN WHEN I WAS YOUNGER
#i cant express how safe the goddamn goat lady & her kid made me feel vs my parents who started hunting 4 me
#like ive been dragged home so many times im not going through that shit again
#i miss the goat the mom & the kid we were just chilling @ like midnight 4 a bit
#did this turn in2 a vent? idk
#i do this a lot ill prolly delete this soonish when im kore calm
#bc rn i want 2 chuck bricks in my laundry machine & watch them fly out & hit whatever
#im going back 2 watching anime if i have 2 talk 2 1 other person i will actually explode
#like irl person not online the silly gay ppl in my phone r super cool & amazing & i love them
#im srry 4 bing a dick btw
#i cant explain it i mean i could but i cant im just my brain is telling me eveyr1 h8s me & MAN i h8 it when it does
#so im just frightened & by golly & am i havign a cheery time yipyipyip
#typing in tags is sm easier than in a post bc i dont think most ppl read tags lol
#the more i think about my past the more i wonder wtf am i doing here
#bc how did i even get out of the house in the 1st place & then ontop of that was able 2 hide
#like what……
#bc they were fucking grabbing me n shit & they have CARS like i didnt go in the park i walked the sidewalks HOW DID I MOT GET CAUGHT??
#MULTIPLE TIMES??? LIKE I ‘ran away’ MULTIPLE TIMES
#i didnt exactly run away tho bc i didnt want them 2 file police shit i didnt eant 2 deal w/that & also hirt the pll i stayed over w/
#so i always went back. obviously blehhh
#ug hj hhhh my heads hurting again this is like the 4th day in a row :((
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