#GOD*

[adultemophase]

“If I have no one left to protect, I would fall in love” is going to make me burst into tears

[christiansinternational]

[sagekjs21]

I have just learned from personal experience to never base this issue solely on my own assumption. First and foremost, it must be brought to God so that He can provide you with what the actual truth is. Second, it is then your job to approach the other person with what you believe you have discerned and clarify this with them. Will a truly malicious person claim to be ignorant? Most likely yes, but this is again where the discernment of God comes into play. When you have that conversation with this person, seek the wisdom of the Holy Spirit. He will reveal the truth to you. But making the assumption that someone is being malicious when in fact they may be ignorant or even incompetent can literally lead to the destruction of a relationship. Bottom line, never assume. 

Don’t assume malice. Assume ignorance. Life is easier, the world is kinder, and you can educate. Actual malice is pretty rare, I find. 

[heartsings77]

[godslove]

[joejhang]

anyone who says jinx is a better older sister than vi can fucking choke because they are so incomparable it's killing me. vi was a literal child when she took on both a sibling AND parent role towards powder. like hg was literally 15 years old. and despite her age and their shitty circumstances vi still did really fucking well as an older sister. she always protected and defended powder, always tried to do what was best for and by her, never downgraded her or made fun of her and always made sure to comfort and support her. everyone who says "vi abandoned her!" like do you know how stupid you sound. yes it wasn't right for vi to lash out the way that she did, but she was a teenage girl who just lost (another) parental figure (indirectly caused by her younger sister, no less) and who went thru some terrible trauma in the span of like...half an hour tops and even tho powder obv just wanted to help, it was partially her fault, so of fucking course vi would be upset and angry, she's literally grieving and trying to process all of that. and she literally retreated as soon as she came to her senses and realised she'd hurt powder. she didn't abandon her, she walked away to catch her breath, and kept powder within eyesight and as soon as she saw silco was going to run back to her but was forcibly stopped by marcus??? like she was literally fucking knocked out and arrested. she never left powder by choice and spent the next seven years living through hell on earth thinking about finding her sister again. "jinx is a better older sister than vi" OR she's an actual adult who's had a good role model for an older sister/parental figure and also just has an entirely different personality and entirely different bond with isha than vi and powder had??? jfc arcane fandom makes me wanna tear my hair out sometimes.

[abirdepisode]

“if I have subconscious knowledge that an interaction is beyond my capability, it does not present itself as an option to me.

It's the minimum communication requirements that prevent me from asking for help,

not anything to do with the concept of help itself.”

I realized the other day that the reason I didn't watch much TV as a teenager (and why I'm only now catching up on late aughts/early teens media that I missed), is because I literally didn't understand how to use our TV. My parents got a new system, and it had three remotes with a Venn diagram of functions. If someone left the TV on an unfamiliar mode, I didn't know how to get back to where I wanted to be, so I just stopped watching TV on my own altogether.

I explained all this to my therapist, because I didn't know if this was more related to my then-unnoticed autism, or to my relationship with my parents at the time (we had issues less/unrelated to neurodivergency). She told me something interesting.

In children's autism assessments, a common test is to give them a straightforward task that they cannot reasonably perform, like opening an overtight jar. The "real" test is to see, when they realize that they cannot do it on their own, if they approach a caregiver for help. Children that do not seek help are more likely to be autistic than those that do.

This aligns with the compulsory independence I've noticed to be common in autistic adults, particularly articulated by those with lower support needs and/or who were evaluated later in life. It just genuinely does not occur to us to ask for help, to the point that we abandon many tasks that we could easily perform with minor assistance. I had assumed it was due to a shared common social trauma (ie bad experiences with asking for help in the past), but the fact that this trait is a childhood test metric hints at something deeper.

My therapist told me that the extremely pathologizing main theory is that this has something to do with theory of mind, that is doesn't occur to us that other people may have skills that we do not. I can't speak for my early childhood self, or for all autistic people, but I don't buy this. Even if I'm aware that someone else has knowledge that I do not (as with my parents understanding of our TV), asking for help still doesn't present itself as an option. Why?

My best guess, using only myself as a model, is due to the static wall of a communication barrier. I struggle a lot to make myself understood, to articulate the thing in my brain well enough that it will appear identically (or at least close enough) in somebody else's brain. I need to be actively aware of myself and my audience. I need to know the correct words, the correct sentence structure, and a close-enough tone, cadence, and body language. I need draft scripts to react to possible responses, because if I get caught too off guard, I may need several minutes to construct an appropriate response. In simple day-to-day interactions, I can get by okay. In a few very specific situations, I can excel. When given the opportunity, I can write more clearly than I am ever capable of speaking.

When I'm in a situation where I need help, I don't have many of my components of communication. I don't always know what my audience knows. I don't have sufficient vocabulary to explain what I need. I don't know what information is relevant to convey, and the order in which I should convey it. I don't often understand the degree of help I need, so I can come across inappropriately urgent or overly relaxed. I have no ability to preplan scripts because I don't even know the basic plot of the situation.

I can stumble though with one or two deficiencies, but if I'm missing too much, me and the potential helper become mutually unintelligible. I have learned the limits of what I can expect from myself, and it is conceptualized as a real and physical barrier. I am not a runner, so running a 5k tomorrow does not present itself as an option to me. In the same way, if I have subconscious knowledge that an interaction is beyond my capability, it does not present itself as an option to me. It's the minimum communication requirements that prevent me from asking for help, not anything to do with the concept of help itself.

Maybe. This is the theory of one person. I'm curious if anyone else vibes with this at all.

[souvenir116]

now why does lando belittles oscar "I dont care about the switch, I'm not here to win sprints, I'm here to win races and championships" this man helped you all year for a wdc you never actually won.

[thomastanker02]

I was wondering if you could pray for a few people:

My dad, who has been hospitalized for having issues with his intestines.

My cousin’s step sibling, who has been hospitalized after being hit by a car.

My great aunt who has broken her arm.

My aunt’s mother, who has just lost her brother.

Cecil Pearson’s family (he was a preacher I followed on YouTube and he passed away a few days ago).

My grandfather, who’s having a myriad of health concerns.

Thank you for your prayers, God bless, Jesus loves you all very much 🙏✝️❤️

[skibasyndrome]

Saturday Snippet?

hey so!!! I DID in fact find some time to write!! yay!!! it feels so good to be back to enjoying things 🫶😭 have a... saturday snippet...? of one of those originally-meant-to-be-kinktober fics that I still have lying around. Under the cut for being slightly nsfw

Wille thinks he can hear Simon smile, that typical brief exhale through his nose, a distant, quiet hum. The thought of Simon having to pause, to lean back, to take it all in, sends a shiver up Wille's spine. There’s a dangerous thrill in not knowing, not being able to see. In having to wait for verbal confirmation that he’s doing it right. He hopes he’s being good for Simon, hopes he is looking pretty with the black silk tied around his head.

There’s the shifting of fabric, the mattress dipping next to Wille’s chest, Simon’s hand gone from his aching cock. Goosebumps rise on his neck when hot breath fans over it. He holds his own breath, doesn’t want to miss a single thing. Wille digs his fingers into the sheet beneath him, afraid he might reach out if he doesn’t keep his hands busy. But Simon said ‘hands to yourself’ in his softest voice when he put the blindfold on Wille earlier, and Wille is determined to do as he’s told. Even if the heat he feels radiating off Simon’s body, so close and yet too far, is making it hard not to reach out and run his hands all over him. Wille can’t help but gasp when he feels Simon’s warm breath on his ear. There's a gentle tug on the blindfold, fingers sliding underneath the fabric and into Wille's hair. Immediately, he leans into the touch and sighs. “Still feeling okay?” Simon asks, and Wille nods eagerly, feeling the fabric shift with Simon's fingers still trapped underneath.

[ilovemesomevincentprice]

Vincent Price circa mid-50's.

[kingdomreigns]

The words of Jesus.

“I have said all these things to you to keep you from falling away.” John 16:1

It is spiritual suicide to stop hearing the words of Jesus.

— John Piper

[christiansinternational]

Let your mind be governed by the Spirit.

[heartsings77]

[godslove]