#Frog's tarot log

[tadpoles-and-daydreams]

Hi, there!

I don't know if your free readings are still open, but your blog showed on my dashboard three times in a row, so I'm taking it as a sign ✨

This week I had a hard time dealing with a bad habit I'm trying to get rid of, and I failed, several times, I've been feeling guilty since then. So my question is, are my deities and guides mad with me for this?

I'm currently worshipping Apollo and Hekate, if that info helps.

Thank you very much beforehand! 💕

Heyo! Sorry this took so damn long anon- in fact, whether or not your comfortable saying if this resonated I'd really appreciate you shooting me an ask when you see this just so I know you got it! I'm so worried that you won't because anons don't get notifications, lol.

However, this took a while for good reason! I do shorter readings first and I wanted to specifically give more time and effort towards yours, the same amount as a paid reading, since honestly it hit close to home for me. I understand the worry that your deities might be angry or upset with you, so I just went ahead and did a full reading for this one. (Although, there's no channeled bits for each card like in a paid reading and instead I just put one bit from Hekate at the end!)

As always, my Ko-Fi link is at the bottom to tip if you want to and are financially able, or for anyone who sees this and wants to check out my paid readings! There's no social pressure however, I just want to make it clear from the beginning. <3

That being said, Hekate was the only one who stepped forward, for this one, so all of the cards are from her! Here's your reading;

Are you mad at or upset with them?

Strong no on this one. I later asked Apollo to make sure that I could add him onto this and he said I could- neither of them are upset with you in any way.

What do you have to say about their feelings of guilt?

Four of Wands: Home, Backbone, Foundation. This card feels like a bit of advice to try and stabilize yourself. You don't have to worry so much, so take a deep breath and try to stabilize those emotions. This card has a bit of an emphasis on home and a sense of security, and it feels to me like Hekate is telling you to find that within yourself and within your deities; they're not going to be angry or upset with you. Accept who you are, because they already do. This quote straight from the guidebook feels incredibly relevant to me: "Celebrate your wings, no matter how large or small they are. Embrace any mistakes you have made- they are what make you human!"

Three of Wands: Persistence, Anticipation, Progression. You're making progress, don't forget that! There's no need to feel guilty for falling back on bad habits when the fact that you're even trying is already huge! This is a card of steady persistence, and handling challenges. You're growing, and that won't happen overnight- slow and steady wins the race. Your thoughts are the beginning of actions, so don't discredit yourself for "failing" when you're thinking about working on a habit. That will grow into something great!

"What do you have to say about their bad habit and struggling to break it?"

King of Swords: Clarity, Mental Strength, Cerebral. This is a situation in which you need to be objective. Your guilt is clouding your vision, and it's easy to get wrapped up in it. Right now what you need to do is clear all that debris, and work logically with what you know. This could be a gentle nudge towards making a structure or rule set when it comes to this habit- maybe a plan for what to do when you find yourself wanting to fall back on it? This feels like encouragement to use your logical mind.

Queen of Swords reversed: Ice Queen, Judgmental, Detached. Apparently, Hekate really wanted to get the point across- another card encouraging logic and objective thinking. This card has a bit of duality, as it can mean you're either being too emotional- or not emotional enough and therefore forgetting compassion. I feel it's a bit of both. In the midst of your emotions, it's easy to be judgmental. Rather than lashing out at others like the guidebook suggests, you're lashing out at yourself. Don't be so harsh on yourself, even if it feels so easy! Remember the sort of compassion you would offer to others in your situation; you probably wouldn't treat them the way you're treating yourself. It might help to think of yourself from the perspective of a friend. You wouldn't be so angry with a friend for this, would you?

Six of Cups: Familiarity, Innocence, Nostalgia. When was the last time you really let your inner child enjoy something? Six of Cups is a reminder that it's not all work; take some time to enjoy yourself! Be silly, take comfort in the familiar childish things, remind yourself of simpler days. If you're missing the times in life in which you were more innocent, and more free- do your best to spend some time making those days a reality now. Take a day or even an hour of free time to do something you would normally deem too childish. Nothing is too childish if it brings you joy, remind yourself of that! There's always room for more joy, so open your heart and do something fun.

Strength: Fierce, Endurance, Courage. Strength is nothing if not a "you've got this" card. This is a reminder that you have the tools to thrive, even- and sometimes especially- when it doesn't feel like it. Strength particularly feels to me like in this case it's calling out your ability to tame your impulses, and exercise self-control. You can do this with grace and power, don't doubt yourself. Give yourself compassion and patience; you'll get there.

The World reversed: Final Stretch, Impediment, Hindrance. Don't give up! I'm not even joking, that sums up this card really well. You're so close to your goals, aaaaaand bam- you keep getting delayed again and again and it's understandably frustrating. It's easy to lose hope when you feel like you're going nowhere- but you're not! You're in the final stretch, or at least you're way closer to your goals than you think. Summon that strength from the previous card and keep going, it'll be worth it.

"Do you have any encouragement or advice for them?"

The Star: Healing, Inspiration, Serenity. This is a clear reminder that your deities have got your back through thick and thin. They're not so easy to offend or upset- they're right there for you! Trust in them, and trust in yourself. I don't quote the guidebook too often but this part felt too specific to avoid quoting: "Simply put, you are flawless. The world is ready for your transformation into the star you always knew you were." You may not feel like you always knew it- but your deities have. Be gentle with yourself, and recognize that you're just as valuable as anyone else, bad habit or not.

"Any final words to end this reading on a good note?"

Seven of Pentacles reversed: Wasted Effort, Restructure, Low Return. This feels like a call back to the card that may have been a gentle nudge from Hekate to build a structured approach to this habit. Looking into ways to redirect that energy or alternatives might help; come up with a plan. Right now effort might feel wasted, and creating a system to where you put your time and effort might be helpful!

Justice reversed: Injustice, Unfair, Delinquency. This card, admittedly, trips me up- I had to ask Hekate for confirmation with each interpretation of this card. Ultimately what she confirmed I should settle on was this: As hard as this is, you're being taught a lesson that is needed. Sometimes you have to go through a lot of struggle to change- it's best to accept that and work for it, even if it sucks.

Ten of Swords reversed: Victimhood, Restoration, Transformation. You're letting go of things that no longer serve you, and it's scary- but it's exactly what you need to do. Avoiding change would just make things worse, so let go of what is old and make room for the new. It'll be work, but the transformation that it will result in will be wonderful, so look forward to it!

And then a little channeled writing at the end for you from Hekate:

"You're not as irredeemable as you think. It's okay to fail every once in a while. It's okay to even fail often. That doesn't determine your value. What matters is how you handle that failure. Get up, let us lead you through the pain- you're strong enough to do this on your own. We won't make you. We want to be here. You're making more progress than you would believe. Push yourself, but don't hate yourself when you fall. It happens to everyone."

Thank you for sending in the ask, I hope this reading helps! Here's my Ko-Fi, as always, for anyone interested:

[ultimateanthropoll]

Guaranteed Round One Slots:

In alphabetical order by series because that's how I have them organized:

Juan Carlos Bodoque - 31 Minutos (He always had a guaranteed spot)

Nico the Catboy - Adventure Time oc (Massacre Round Survivor)

Garfield the Deals Warlock - The Adventure Zone (Massacre Round Survivor)

The Empress - A Hat in Time (Massacre Round Survivor)

Haida - Aggretsuko (3 submissions)

Max Goof - A Goofy Movie (Massacre Round Survivor)

Louis - Beastars (5 submissions)

Boris the Wolf - Bendy and the Ink Machine/Dark Revival (Massacre Round Survivor)

Bandit - Bluey (Massacre Round Survivor)

Scias - Breath of Fire IV (Massacre Round Survivor)

Kabbu - Bug Fables (Massacre Round Survivor)

Chicory - Chicory a Colorful Tale (Massacre Round Survivor)

Crash Bandicoot - Crash Bandicoot (Massacre Round Survivor)

Ralsei -Deltarune (4 submissions)

Renamon - Digimon (2 submissions)

Duck - Don't Hug Me I'm Scared (Massacre Round Survivor)

Webber - Don't Starve Together (Massacre Round Survivor)

Mason - Duncan and Edddie (Massacre Round Survivor)

Erma Felna - Erma Felna: EDF (or Albedo Anthropomorphics but iirc they changed the series name) (2 submissions)

Meowscles - Fortnite (2 submissions)

Mother Glory - Friends at the Table (Massacre Round Survivor)

Geronimo Stilton - Geronimo Stilton (Massacre Round Survivor)

Basil of Baker Street - The Great Mouse Detective (Massacre Round Survivor)

Krteček - Krteček the mole (2 submissions)

Loona - Helluva Boss (3 submissions)

Bec Noir - Homestuck (Massacre Round Survivor)

Tarot - Housepets (2 submissions)

Master Tigress - Kung Fu Panda (5 submissions)

Mordecai Heller - Lackadaisy (6 submissions)

Xenia - Linux mascot (Massacre Round Survivor)

Nyanta - Log Horizon (Massacre Round Survivor)

Bugs Bunny - Looney Tunes (4 submissions)

Gia - Madagascar 3 (2 submissions)

Piglin - Minecraft (2 submissions)

Kermit the Frog - The Muppets (Massacre Round Survivor)

Nick Nocturne - Night Mind (Massacre Round Survivor)

Kajortoq - No Evil (2 submissions)

Mae Borowski - Night in the Woods (2 submissions)

Giovanni - Night on the Galactic Railroad (2 submissions)

Hajime Tanaka - Odd Taxi (Massacre Round Survivor)

Flioflop - Paranatural (Massacre Round Survivor)

Lord Arum - The Penumbra Podcast (Massacre Round Survivor)

Perry the Platypus - Phineas and Ferb (Massacre Round Survivor)

Lucario - Pokémon movie Lucario and the Mystery of Mew (Massacre Round Survivor)

Death - Puss in Boots: the Last Wish (2 submissions)

Ratboy Genius - Ratboy Genius (Massacre Round Survivor)

Woodcutter Bear - Rhythm Heaven (Massacre Round Survivor)

Roger Rabbit - Who Framed Roger Rabbit (Massacre Round Survivor)

Sly Cooper - Sly Cooper (2 submissions)

Red Savarin - Solatorbo Red the Hunter (Massacre Round Survivor)

Shadow the Hedgehog - Sonic the Hedgehog (2 submissions)

Gwen - Spiritfarer (Massacre Round Survivor)

Squidward Tentacles - Spongebob Squarepants (3 submissions)

Fox McCloud - Star Fox (2 submissions)

Wolfrun - PreCure (2 submissions)

Melody Amaranth - Super Lesbian Animal RPG (3 submissions)

Diane Foxington - The Bad Guys (5 submissions)

Baron Humbert von Gikkingen - The Cat Returns (2 submissions)

Prince Sidon - The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild (2 submissions)

Jerry - Tom and Jerry (Massacre Round Survivor)

Captain Amelia - Treasure Planet (4 submissions)

Arte Fact - Webkinz (2 submissions)

Swampy - Where's My Water (Massacre Round Survivor)

Nick Wilde - Zootopia (He always had a guaranteed spot)

Bracket will be out shortly! Send your propaganda in now because it WILL influence the tournament.

[legendtarot]

I hope this finds you all well. With all of the Fall Energy, and with Mercury in retrograde in Scorpio it’s a good time to look at this Monday’s Modern Myth: The Peeper Tree Frog.

The Spring Peeper (Pseudacris Crucifer) is a small chorus frog that sings at the beginning of spring, found across Canada and the United States.

“Crucifer” is Latin meaning ‘cross-bearer’. This is not only due to the brown ‘X’ shaped pattern upon their backs, these amazing creatures self-resurrect. Not unlike so many powerful perennial myths that touch so many religions and traditions.

These tiny little squeakers [no really, listen here, not affiliated] have to endure occasional sub-freezing temperatures during the breeding season. According to Wikipedia:

"The species can tolerate the freezing of some of its body fluids, and undergoes hibernation under logs or behind loose bark on trees. It is capable of surviving the freezing of its internal body fluids to temperatures as low as -8 °C."

If freezing and reincarnation multiple times in one lifetime was not enough to amaze you, some species can breathe through their skin as a backup. Resourceful and divine. Certainly a Modern Myth.

What can this sonorous little frog teach us about ourselves? The constant process of reinventing yourself after a long freeze? Not unlike the coming winter.

Take heart if the world goes dark and quiet, when spring returns you may just hear the chirping of the Peeper Tree Frog.

-----

Really cool site to check out! Canada Nature.org, is tracking the frogs.

Resources:

Wikipedia

National Geographic

#Tarot#Tree Frog#Totem#Modern Myth#legend tarot

[artificialqueens]

UFO (Katlaska)- Squeaky

The year is 1921. Katya is sent to a farm in Kansas for a year of independent witch study, but she finds more than cows there.

OR: The love story of a witch, an alien princess, and a pink milkshake.

CRASH LANDING

Katya is sixteen, the year in which a witch comes of age, when they send her to Fame’s Farm. She thought the term to be a euphemism and fully expected to arrive at the gates of a mansion. Instead, Katya finds herself, broom in one hand and suitcase in the other, at a wooden doorstep.

“You must be Katya,” Miss. Fame beams. She’s got a chicken perched on her hip, but she looks a lot more like a graying glamour model than a farmer.

“Uh, yes. And you must be…Miss. Fame?”

“Come in. Come in,” Miss. Fame clucks as she takes her luggage and carries it to a small bedroom. The room is so dusty that it makes Katya’s eyes water. A sullen cat slinks out from under the bed. It might have been black a long time ago but now it’s been stained white.

“Fuck off, buddy,” the cat hisses as Katya goes to pet her.

She pulls back her hand: “Is that your familiar?”

“Betty? Goddess, no! She’s a human trapped in cat form. One of those 100 year punishment or whatnot for upsetting a powerful warlock…or maybe for stealing a goblin’s painting. I don’t remember.”

“Oh,” is all Katya says as she uses her broom for it’s intended purpose of cleaning. Sweeping swiftly, she manages to get it spotless before dinnertime. She’s brought nothing but her dresses, tarot cards, and gems, so it doesn’t take long to unpack.

By now the house smells like sizzling bacon and eggs. Fame has loaded the table up with so much food, it sags under the weight. After her long and often disastrous flight here from New York, Katya’s ready to eat.

“Wait! We have to thank the old witcher goddesses,” Fame interrupts. Katya pulls at her collar as the woman starts to babble in Latin. She stares out the window and holds her breath, trying not to inhale any of the mouth-watering food. There are miles and miles of dark fields that extend past what her eye can see. In New York, she lived in a bustling neighborhood of witches. Why did her mother send her here? Nowhere land?

By the time Miss. Fame has finished babbling, the food is cold. Katya digs in anyways.

“So you flew all the way? Very impressive,” Fame compliments.

“I guess,” Katya says even though most girls can mount a broom by age ten and fly across the state by thirteen. The hardest part was keeping on course, but she stopped at a couple of small towns for directions.

“So are we going to start lessons tomorrow, Miss. Fame?”

“Of course.”

“Yes! My friends have come back from their year knowing how to turn mice into teacups. I thought we could start by learning how to brew love potions-”

“Well, we’re not going to focus on parlor tricks like that. Your education will consist of practical house cleaning magic, Latin, and chores.”

“Chores?” Katya repeats. The word sits heavy on her tongue. Latin? Cleaning magic? That sounds like such a waste of time. Katya wants to become a powerful witch not some rich Wizard’s housewife! It would be rude to say any of that, but Katya’s tight lips and crossed arms say it all.

Fame turns on the radio and happily hums along to the tune of a slow country song. Katya grimaces. If she had the freedom, she’d turn the channel to listen to some jazzy Louis Armstrong. Instead, she closes her door, throws herself onto her bed, and screams into a pillow.

“Anger management, sweetie,” Betty chuckles as Katya sharply turns and throws the pillow at her.

She crawls deeper into her bed, tries to slow her breathing, and wishes she was back in New York. Katya misses the hustle and bustle of the automobiles. She misses the sweet swing of the streets. Most of all she misses her witch sisters- Violet, Ginger, and Trixie. Katya hopes that they’re off to more exciting adventures than she is.

Katya dreams that they’re holding a seance on the rooftop of their building. All the girls’ hands are linked, and they’re rising up higher and higher…until Katya’s drifting alone among the stars. She opens her mouth to scream, clinging to the silver moon, but all the oxygen is gone.

She wakes up to Miss. Fame ringing the bell. The sun isn’t up, and Katya isn’t up either. She tries to go back to sleep but Betty jumps on her face and pulls at her earrings. Katya hisses back at her.

Finally, she pulls on a baggy, shapeless dress. She doesn’t care if it gets dirty. Fame shows her how to milk a cow so as not to get kicked, how to collect the chicken’s eggs, and how to brush all the animals. Katya yawns and tugs down the brim of her floppy hat.

“Pay attention,” Fame warns. “You’re going to have to do this all by yourself tomorrow.”

Katya fantasizes about grabbing her broom and launching herself into the sky, flying up, up and away from this dull, old farm. Instead, she sweeps the doorstep. Then come the Latin reciations, goddess prayers, and peeling potatoes 101.

“What’s the point of this?” Katya asks on day three as she brings in the eggs and milk. Her dress is scuffed with dirt and her hands are calloused. She can babble now in Latin, but she still hasn’t learned a single, useful spell. She’s cooked chicken soup, but she hasn’t learned to make a witches brew.

“Building character,” Fame tells her. “You have to be tough. You hear about the stories of girls turning themselves into frogs? Blowing up barns?”

“I wouldn’t do that,” Katya whines, sounding more petulant than she intended. What she meant was- can I please learn some magic now?

“I know I don’t look it, but I’m a hundred years old, Katya. I know what young witches are capable of when they don’t control their powers. There’s a method to my madness, and you’ll understand soon enough.”

“Can’t I at least send a letter to my mother?”

“You know the rules, Kat. No contact.”

“Yeah…I know I’m just…” lonely. “Never mind.”

Her whining earns her a long trip to the brick well.  At least she’s allowed to ride her broom there. Still, after a day of hard labor, Katya can barely grip the handle.

“I hate this,” Katya whispers into the well and then kicks the side of it. “I hate this. I hate this! I. Hate. This.”

The sun is setting, and her stomach growls. Instead of riding back, Katya sits on the side of the stones and buries her face into her hands. She cries as she thinks of all the spells that Ginger must be learning in New Orleans or Violet in Ireland. Why Kansas?

The last of the sun slips down as Katya’s heart sinks. Her cheeks are covered in tears. Katya’s not religious but she folds up her hands anyways-

“Hey, goddess, I know this isn’t Latin or whatever, but if you can hear a girl out in English, that’d be great. I need a friend. I mean, Fame is great, but she can’t keep a conversation going without praising the universe. The universe is also great, but I really need somebody here. And not Bitter fucking Betty. How about an enchanted crow? A possessed log? A tinkering fairy? Please, any friend is a good friend. Amen.”

Katya finishes her prayer, and, when she looks up, sees a shooting star. It doesn’t take an astrologist to tell her that’s a good sign. Maybe someone has been listening to her prayer after all.

Then the shooting star gets closer and closer and- crash! Katya leaps to her feet.

She glances over to Fame’s Farm, where the bell is ringing, and then jumps up onto her broom. It’s a rush to be back up in the sky, racing forward. Katya spots the large crater.

“Hello?” Katya calls as she hovers above it. The hole is big enough to fit three automobiles lying side by side. If only Katya knew a practical fire spell, she might be able to see into it.

Instead, she hovers down to the ground, picks up a stone, and tosses it into the darkness.

Silence…silence…clink!

Katya turns to go when she sees something rising up. It looks like a glowing, white angel, with blonde hair covering her bare breasts, and a sheet fluttering around her midriff.

“Hiiiiiiiiiee,” the white creature shrills. She extends out her hand, fingernails longer than Katya’s hand. Katya takes a step back, trips, and falls.

“W-wow, thanks universe,” Katya sputters. Maybe there is something to all that praying Fame does. The creature is hovering a foot off the ground, and while Katya has read about it, she’s never seen levitation before.

“My name is Princess Alaska Thunder from the planet Glamatron. I’ve come here on a covert mission to observe earth’s finest delicacies. Take me to your holy beasts.”

“Princess?” Katya exclaims. “Aw geez, I’ve never met royalty before. Let alone space royalty. Wow. None of the gals are gonna believe this. Oh, right, my name’s Katya from the planet Earth, and I’m a witch-in-training.”

“Take me to your bovine gods, witch,” Alaska commands as her golden sandals touch the ground.

“Bovine…? I don’t know what that is, but there’s nothing on Fame’s farm except for weeds and chickens and cows.”

“You speak English, no? I can switch to Russian, Spanish, German, or Chinese. My translator is limited.”

“N-no, English is fine. I mean know a little Latin and some conversational Russian, but English is cool. I just don’t know what you’re looking for.”

“I want lactating lactose.”

“Uh, milk?”

“Yes! The Earth is alone in the galaxy with its production of white gold. The only source of sweet, sweet nectar in the vast universe is this primitive planet, and I’d rather not travel to an alternative universe.”

“Primitive? We invented jazz and refrigerators and, uh, missiles, you know! But come on- I think I can get you some milk,” Katya babbles as she throws her foot over the side of her broom and pats the back seat.

Alaska’s hands wrap around her waist, and Katya blushes when she feels her naked breasts. There’s a foreign bulge pressed up to the curve of her backside, and Katya’s known a lot of girls…but never one like this before. Wow, space babes are the best!

The sky is studded with stars, extending over the endless fields, and Katya feels like they’re the only two beings in the universe right now. The wind embraces them, and, showing off, Katya does a trick in the air. Alaska shrieks and hugs her tighter. Katya’s heart is fast and loud in her chest, and Alaska’s breathe is hot against her neck. She feels alive, beautifully alive.

“You’re out of this world,” Katya calls out.

Alaska giggles, and, for an alien princess, she’s surprisingly human. The vibrations of the broom make Kaya bite her lip, especially with the rub of Alaska against her backside. All they need is some slow jazz.

She zooms inside the barn and crash lands in the hayloft. Alaska blows a piece of straw out of her hair and giggles again. Katya presses a finger to her lip and slides down the ladder to approach the ‘bovine god.’ Three days have taught her how to fill a bucket like a pro.

Alaska, for a princess, dribbles the milk down her chin. She throws her blonde head back in pleasure and moans as she drinks. Katya licks her lips, watching the drops trickle down Alaska’s naked chest. She recognizes the wetness between her thighs from riding her broom too long, but Katya’s not sure why she gets that same tightness from watching Alaska.

“Do all aliens not wear clothes?” Katya asks, breathless.

“Some do. I should have changed into traditional Earthling clothing, but I didn’t have time…”

“Oh,” Katya flushes. “It’s ok with me if you dress like that…but I don’t think Miss. Fame will be ok. She’s my instructor and a bit of a traditionalist, which is strange for a witch. Usually, we’re more of a liberal type of people, but Miss.Fame does live all alone on this farm with her chickens so…oops, I’m rambling, aren’t I?”

“It’s cute,” Alaska hiccups, wiping the white from her mouth.

“Wait here.”

Katya sneaks inside the house and picks out her prettiest dress- a french blue number. It reminds her of the dresses that the flapper girls wear down at the club. Her mother wouldn’t let her buy something this short, but Violet gave it to her as a goodbye gift. She slips out her window to the barn loft. Alaska strips naked in front of her, and Katya blinks at the sight of…

“So are you a, uh, boy or girl?”

“I don’t understand the question,” Alaska says as she slips on a pair of panties, which push up her cock. Katya knows it’s not polite to stare, but she’s never seen anything like it. The combination of Alaska’s slight breasts with the bulge between her legs makes Katya bite her lip and pull at her own gown.

“So can you get pregnant?”

“Of course.”

“Can you…impregnate?”

“Of course,” Alaska confirms as she smooths down the dress. “I don’t really understand this line of questioning. On Glamatron, gender is a preference not a rigid requirement.”

“Oh,” Katya says, confused. Either way Alaska looks like a dream in the flapper gown. She does a twirl, and Katya momentarily forgets how to breathe.

It’s sweltering, but Katya still brought along a blanket for Alaska to sleep under. She wants to stay here with the alien girl, but Katya knows Miss.Fame will worry.

“How long are you staying?”

“Just a week or so until I can get my space ship repaired. Plus, I have yet to taste the full range of Earth’s lactate products. I hope you don’t mind.”

Katya shakes her head and stares at the unearthly beauty.

Then she leans forward and pecks Alaska softly on the lips: “That’s, uh, how we say goodbye here.”

Alaska smiles, cups her face, and kisses her harder. Katya’s stomach twists as she squeezes her thighs together. Alaska pulls back-

“How funny. It’s the same way on my planet.”

——-

REPAIRING

Katya wakes up to glowing eyes. Fuck, why is Betty the creepiest, cursed cat? It’s like all the stars aligned to create the most hateful creature in all of Kansas.

“Girls in the attic? Tut tut, that’s not something you should be hiding from our dear, old Fame. Secrets are hard to keep on such a small farm. Makes me think your friend…is a little more than friendly.”

“I’m just waiting for a good time to introduce her,” Katya grumbles as she threw off the covers and shoves Betty away.

“Ay, there’s no better time than now, Kat.”

“I’ll do it tomorrow, cat,” she snaps and then yawns. It’s hard getting up at five am when you went to sleep past midnight. Only her secret keeps Katya from falling face first back into bed. She ditches the brown muslin for a meadow-green dress. It’s down to her ankles, but at least it’s cinched at the waist. Katya ties her hair into braids and dons a bonnet.

Fame compliments her fashion as she goes out the door. Katya only waves, stomach flipping as Betty slinks out past her.

Alaska, dangling her legs from the hayloft, is already awake when Katya enters the cool barn. She jumps down, way too effortless to be human, and greets Katya by rubbing their foreheads together. Katya leans in for a kiss (“It’s, uh, how you say ‘hello’ too.”)

Alaska drinks the milk straight from the bucket, carefully now so as not to stain her new gown. Katya tells her to wait as she goes to eat breakfast. She shoves it down quick and does her recitations so quickly that Miss.Fame raises an arched brow.

“I, uh, want to go out to play in the fields,” Katya says in one breath.

“Aren’t you a little too old for that?”

“Too old for fresh air? I’ll take my Latin there and practice,” Katya promises as she grabs the old, musty book and kisses Miss.Fame on the cheek. The older witch is so taken back by her change in attitude that she doesn’t try to stop her.

“Pssst, Lasky! Hop on quick, princess.”

Alaska is plastered to her back, like she’s ridden a broom all her life. Katya can feel her, uh, bulge, through the sheer fabric of the dress. In the morning light, Alaska’s nails are bright pink. They click together as she wraps them around Katya’s stomach.

Then they’re up, up, and off into the golden sky. The world is new, like it reinvented itself over night. Everything is a shining, glittering dew. Katya breathes in the morning breeze. A blue jay races them back to Alaska’s crater.

There, Katya spends the rest of the morning gathering up flowers to make crowns. They’re queens of this golden universe. The butterflies land on the green of her dress, mistaking her for a flower.

“Bluebirds singin’ a song. Nothin’ but bluebirds all day long,” Katya trills. “Blue skies, smilin’ at me. Nothin’ but blues skies do I see.”

“What’s that?” Alaska asks as she floats up, and Katya places the flower crown on her head.

“Louis Armstrong.”

“Who is he? Do you know him?

“A famous singer. I don’t know him, but I wish I did- I love all his music so much.”

Alaska just stares at her and tilts her head: “You have a nice voice…for an Earthling.”

“And you’re rude…for an alien-ling. Can I see your spaceship?”

Alaska just grabs her smoothly by the waist and floats them down. It’s all metal, like nothing that Katya has ever seen before. It looks like a silver plate. She curls her toes inside her boots as they enter.

Katya doesn’t know anything about spaceships, but she doesn’t see any dents or bumps. All of the controls inside are intact. But maybe the damage is invisible? Hidden beneath all the circuits and wires?

She feels out of place with her flower crown, green dress, and broom. Like she’s collided into a world that she doesn’t belong to. For some reason, it wouldn’t be hard to picture Miss. Fame with her silver hair and knowing eyes running her hands along these flashing panels.

“It’s beautiful,” Katya finally says. “Never seen anything like it before.”

“My dad gave it to me for my sixteenth birthday. All my friends got the new chrome pods, but he told me this model was safer…”

“I like it?”

Alaska snorts: “Because you’ve never seen any of the others.”

Katya crosses her arms and says, “Well, when my mom got me a broom, I didn’t complain because I wanted a golden one. Maybe you should be a little more thankful?”

“You’re…right. I guess I’m just mad because he-” Alaska cuts herself off. “You want to go get more lactose? I’ve seen pictures of pink shakes on the galactic net.”

“A…what? You do know we’re in the middle of nowhere Kansas? It’s an hour ride by broom to the nearest diner.”

“But a minute by spaceship,” Alaska says with a wink as she flips her blonde hair over her shoulders and sits down at the controls. She looks like pale moonlight in that blue gown. A dream come to life.

Katya straps herself into the passenger’s side even as she wonders how Alaska fixed it so quickly. Didn’t she say it would take a week?

But all her doubts are gone when Alaska pulls the lever, and they’re rising up into the golden world. The birds below sadly chirp as they zoom away. Katya’s ridden in an automobile but never a spaceship! Her eyes are wide. Breath gone. Pulse racing.

“Hang on, witch-y,” Alaska yells.

Katya looks down to see the ship, but it has disappeared. Wow, she’s only ever read stories about invisibility spells.

“H-how do you know where we’re going?”

“Intergalactic GPS.”

“What?”

“I got a map!”

They pull up to a diner. It’s full of cute girls with bob cuts and boys in smart suits. Alaska takes her by the hand and helps her out. Katya’s never been swept off her feet, but Alaska has thoroughly swept her inhibitions away. She bets neither Violet nor Ginger have ever ridden a spaceship before.

They get a pink smoothie to share, and Katya doesn’t have any money, but Alaska pulls a 20 dollar bill right out! Katya’s not sure if her or the waiter’s eyes are wider.  

“Paper money is easy to print,” Alaska whispers as the man goes to get them change. Katya, drunk off of sugar and adrenaline, can only nod.

“Can you tell me about your home?” Katya asks like this is a regular date.

“The sky is always black and never changes. Our people have to live underground to avoid the toxic air. Most of our kind spend their time travelling the galaxy, serving our military or trading, but my father doesn’t let me leave.”

“I’m sorry,” Katya says. “My mother’s protective too.”

“It’s not even protection. He’s suffocating me. As if our planet’s air wouldn’t do that job for him.”

Katya doesn’t know what to say, so she takes a long sip.

“With all the places on Earth, why did you crash land here?”

“There were high populations of bovine gods,” Alaska answers, but she looks away as she says it. Katya isn’t sure how truthful Alaska’s being.

By the time they get back, the sun is high in the sky. Katya fans herself with her hat as she closes the barn doors behind them. She creeps up into Alaska’s hayloft, and, like two regular girls at a sleepover, they make plans for the rest of the week.

“How long do you think it would take to get to Paris? We could leave at midnight and be back before Miss. Fame wakes up in the morning. Or- no, let’s go down to New Orleans. That’s where all the real witches go to listen to jazz and learn voodoo magic. My bosom sister, Ginger, is down there learning the craft,” Katya rambles, twirling her finger around Alaska’s hair, and then sighs wistfully at the thought.

“Why is my- I mean why is Miss. Fame not teaching you magic?”

“Thinks I’m a loose, irresponsible witch…” Katya rolls her eyes. “Which I am. But that doesn’t mean I don’t deserve to learn. Like, how does she expect me to become anything more if all I do is clean up chicken poop all day? Is the universe just gonna tell me the answers?”

“My daddy seems to think the same thing. He’d rather I’d stay locked up in the palace all day than go see the galaxy. I-” Alaska flushes a deep red. “I stole the ship. He wasn’t going to give it to me until my eighteenth birthday, so I just took it and fled.”

“Wow.”

Now Katya knew that Alaska was not a traveler but a run away. Alaska also lied about the ship being broken. Why? And what else has she lied to Katya about? Instead of saying all that, Katya launches into a story about the first time she snuck into a speakeasy and tasted moonshine. Alaska is entranced, eyes wide, desperate to ‘taste the moon’ for herself.

By the time Katya comes inside it’s past lunchtime, and Miss. Fame lightly scolds her and makes her peel potatoes for the rest of the day. It’s dull work, but the milkshake and illicit plans to Paris and New Orleans have given her a boost of energy. Plus, the kiss that Alaska left Katya with makes her lips tingle.

Katya peels and sings: “All the days are hurryin’ by. When you’re in love, my how they fly.”

“In love with who?”

“It’s just a song, Miss. Fame.”

“I don’t trust love songs. Slippery slopes. But you keep up all this good work, sweetie, and we’ll have you doing spells in no time.”

Betty slips into the kitchen, leaps up onto the countertop, and gives Katya a dirty look. When Miss. Fame’s back is turned, Katya sticks out her tongue. It’s a bad idea to taunt a cursed cat, but has Katya been making great decisions lately?

“If you keep playing with fire, you’re going to get burned,” Betty promises and licks her paw. Katya rolls her eyes, unaware that later that night the barn would burst into flames.

———

RE-ROUTING

Katya wakes up to screams. The whole world is glowing sickly yellow, like Betty’s eyes. Her skin is covered in a thick sheen of sweat as she watches the leaping flames devour the barn.

She runs outside, barefoot, and stares up at the destruction. Ash, like burning snowflakes, falls down. Katya feels sixteen and helpless as the whole world burns.

“Stand back, Katya,” Miss. Fame screams as she rushes past her. She’s reciting a spell, and, when she raises her hands up, water bursts out from the ground to cover the barn. Katya is screaming, but the words are lost at the back of her throat.

“Alaska,” Katya hears herself screaming. “Alaska is inside the barn. She’s in there! Help her. Please, help her.”

Most of the animals are spooked but unharmed. When Katya runs up to the loft, she finds it’s empty. Her heart stops.

“What’s going on? Who’s there?”

“M-m-my friend,” Katya cries.

“From where?”

“Space!”

Miss. Fame has gone pale: “Dear goddess, I thought I’d never see the day when…ALASKA! COME OUT RIGHT HERE OR SO HELP ME I’LL CONTACT YOUR FATHER.”

Katya has never heard Miss. Fame raise her voice before. It’s so out of character that she stops crying immediately. From behind the barn, Alaska creeps out. Her blue gown is scorched so badly that Katya can see the pale of her thighs. She’s clearly shaken.

Miss. Fame pulls her into a tight hug and smooths out her hair. She’s whispering something in her ear, in a language that Katya’s never heard, and Alaska is nodding. What’s going on? How does Miss. Fame know Alaska?

“I’m sorry…Mom,” Alaska sniffles.

What the…?

Katya crosses her arms, feeling lost. Clearly, Alaska has been lying to her this whole time. She didn’t come here to see the ‘bovine gods.’ Her spaceship didn’t crash. She’s been lying, lying and now she set the barn on fire.

“Katya,” Miss. Fame turns on her. “She must have been here for a couple nights? Why didn’t you say anything?”

“I…I mean I was going to but…I…”

Betty comes outside and, judging by her little smirk, she knows a whole lot more than she’d let on. Betty licks her paw and, though cats don’t have eyebrows, seems to quirk hers up at Katya. Told you not to play with fire. Smug little shit.

“Come inside, come inside,” Miss. Fame sighs.

Alaska follows her, golden hair falling over her face, and doesn’t look over. Katya’s stomach twists and tears burn at her eyes. Weren’t they friends? Queens of their own golden universe? But Alaska has done nothing except lie to her. She coughs as she inhales soot.

Miss. Fame makes them hot chocolate, which Alaska drinks immediately, even though it’s burning hot. Katya just stares at her folded hands.

“So?” Miss. Fame begins. “What happened, Alaska?”

“Daddy just doesn't let me do anything, you know.”

“So you run away?”

“I had to! He was suffocating me underground, and I wanted to see the universe. I wanted…to see you. But I didn’t know what to say.”

“You know he’s going to send an army soon! Alaska, the people on earth aren’t strong enough to fight off an invasion.”

Alaska wipes her wet cheeks: “I know but I was just going to stay for a couple of days. I just wanted to see a holy bovine and…and talk to you.”

Miss. Fame’s face softens, and she wraps her hands around Alaska. Katya’s still kind of upset and worried at all this talk about an alien invasion, but her heart melts at the sight of Alaska curled up in Miss.Fame’s arms. It makes her tear up as she thinks of how much her own mother worries about her.

“You can stay,” Miss. Fame sighs. “But just for a couple days, ok? No more wandering the milky way for cows, though. You’re going straight home after this, and I don’t want to hear another word about it.”

Miss. Fame brings another pair of sheets to Katya’s bed while Katya lends Alaska a white nightie to sleep in. When she hands it to her, Katya stares at the ground. It’s childish, but she’s still mad.

They curl in bed, and when Katya closes her eyes, she can see the red of the flames, as if they’ve been seared into her lids. Besides her, Alaska sniffles.

“I’m sorry, Katya. You’ve been nothing but a kind, Earthling witch, and I haven’t repaid your kindness with the truth. I just…please understand that I didn’t know what to say to her. I still don’t. My mom left my planet right after I was born, so all I had was one hologram of her inside my bedroom. That’s it. My father wouldn’t tell me why she left to earth or how she got to Glamatron in the first place. My kind all have blue skin, but because of her I’ve got pale skin, like yours. That’s all I had. One hologram. Light skin. And the knowledge of Earth.”

Katya turns around, so she’s face to face with Alaska, and she hates that she can’t stay mad at her. Alaska is a lonely girl, like her, looking for her place in the universe. She’s sad, confused, and hurting.

She reaches up and tenderly wipes the tears from Alaska’s face. She’s journeyed all the way across the universe to see her mother, only to be told that she has to leave. Katya can’t even imagine what that rejection feels like.

Katya sighs and says, “I’m sorry that your Mom left you. My dad did too, and I know it’s not the same because he only moved a couple of blocks down in Brooklyn and not to a whole other planet…but I never knew what to say to him either. Sometimes people leave you…”

“I wish I knew why. If I have skin just like hers, why didn’t she…?”

Want me, Katya fills in the silence.

“I don’t know. Humans are just…shitty.”

Alaska shifts closer to her: “No, all beings in this universe are equally shitty. Humans might have a monopoly on milk but not on the quality of ‘shitty’-ness.”

Katya giggles and inches closer. Her naked toes brush against Alaska’s, and she shivers at the sudden contact.

“I guess I’m a liar too. Humans don’t kiss each other on the lips to say ‘hello’ and ‘goodbye,’” Katya confesses. “I just wanted to kiss you.”

Alaska shifts forward on the bed, eyes glinting in the dim moonlight, and presses her lips to Katya’s- “They don’t on my planet either.”

She falls asleep in Alaska’s arms.

———

START THE IGNITION

Katya wakes up in the morning to find Alaska’s pink nails resting around the curve of her stomach. The sun is yawning awake and beams of light slip through the curtains. It seems the world has shaken off the ash from the dark night and left a shining, yellow kingdom.

Katya flushes, sweat trickling down her neck, as she feels Alaska’s bulge pressed up to her backside. The light makes her squint as she twists around in Alaska’s arms-

“That feels nice,” Katya whispers and scoots back.

Alaska, still asleep, just nuzzles deeper into Katya. Her breath is hot against the curve of her neck. Katya wriggles against the tight grip and pushes further back into Alaska. Even through the fabric, she can feel Alaska’s cock growing harder and harder.

“Alaska,” Katya whimpers, a little louder.

Her eyes flutter, and she feels the wetness spreading between her thighs. It’s just like the first night on the broom. Kaya squeezes her legs together as she remembers the vibrating sensation and then rolls her hips up into Alaska’s cock.

Since Alaska’s growing harder against her, Katya decides to continue. Oh god, this feels so fucking good. After the night of confusion, it’s nice to be held so tightly in Alaska’s grip. For the first time, there’s no where in the world Katya would rather be. Not Paris. Not New Orleans.

“Katya,” Alaska moans, and when she pushes her cock against Katya’s white nightie this time, it’s intentional. Katya let’s out an involuntary whimper. The insides of her thighs are slick. Her eyes are half hooded. Her toes curl.

“I don’t know what this is,” Katya confesses. “But I don’t want to stop. F-feels so nice.”

“What? Humans don’t have sex for pleasure?”

“Is this what sex is?” Katya wonders out loud as Alaska’s long nails pull up her nightie. She flushes as she looks down and sees how her panties are wet and stained. Her nipples are painfully erect, and she gasps as they brush against her soft nightie.

“At least this is what my people consider sex? Should we ask my Mom?”

“No,” Katya says quickly because she might not know the name for this, but she knows Miss. Fame would not approve of such wanton behavior. Still, the thought of the older woman’s disapproval doesn’t stop her from rolling over, so they’re chest to chest.

She cups Alaska’s flushed face and kisses her, all tongue and desire. Now, Alaska’s cock is pressed up against the softness of her belly. Katya reaches down to touch it, loving how thick and real it feels in her hand. Katya strokes her through her panties.

When she slips her hand down, lower, Katya gasps at the wetness. She hadn’t realized it before but Alaska is…

“A hermaphrodite?”

“Hm?” Alaska murmurs against her lips.

“It’s strange you have both,” Katya giggles, nervous. She’s read about it before, as an insult, but she’s never met anyone before with both. She cautiously moves her hand down and bits her lips as she slides down inside Alaska. Oh.

“Well, I find it strange you only get one,” Alaska shoots back.

“I don’t care which parts you got. Long as you know what to do with ‘em,” Katya says as she pulls back to squeeze her hand around Alaska’s cock. What she lacks in experience, Katya makes up with enthusiasm. Alaska’s eyes are half lidded and she twitches in her grip.

Alaska’s cock, long and hard, is so nice in the palm of her hand. It’s so dirty too, knowing that Fame is only a couple of rooms away. Katya buries her face into Alaska’s shoulder and inhales her slightly smoky scent. Alaska’s nails are too long to touch her directly, but her leg is pressed up between Katya’s thighs. Katya bites back a whimper as she gets herself off against Alaska’s hard leg. Back and forth. Breathe. Back and forth.

Katya’s never gone this far before, but, with Alaska’s soft reassurances in her ear, she lets herself go. Her panties are getting wetter. Her heavy breasts are pressed up to Alaska’s as they rut off against each other, like animals in heat.

“I want to be inside you,” Alaska whispers in her ear, and Katya can’t hold back a whimper. It’s embarrassingly loud. She feels as though she doesn’t have control over her body anymore. Alaska’s mouth is all she can taste. Alaska’s knee pressed against her wetness is all she can feel. Her own heart pounding is all that she can hear.

“I- I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Katya pants. The last thing she wants is to get pregnant. If that’s how it works?

“My semen is only fertile once a moon cycle. Don’t worry, it’s safe,” Alaska reassures her, and, fuck, it’s a good thing alien sex is different than human sex. Not that Katya knows that much about how either works.

She responds by pushing Alaska back and climbing on top of her. She can see herself coming apart in Alaska’s dilated pupils. She pushes down her panties all the way as Alaska does the same. The tip of Alaska, just pressed up inside her, makes Katya’s eyes flutter. She sinks down, taking Alaska all the way inside of her warmth, and blinks away the tears. Oh, wow, this is amazing.

Alaska’s nails sink into her hips to steady her. She throws her head back as she rides Alaska. It’s nothing like having her broomstick pressed up between her legs. No, Alaska is real and squirms under her. Riding Alaska is everything that Katya never knew she wanted.

“So beautiful,” Alaska gasps.

“Beyond this planet beautiful?” Katya teases as she pushes up and down, breasts bouncing.

Her nightie hides the obscene sight, so she lifts it up to watch Alaska’s cock sliding in and out of her. It’s so pink and full, and she loves how it fills her up. Katya, moaning pitifully, speeds up her pace.

“You’re the best thing in this Milky Way,” Alaska promises as she flips them over, so she’s between Katya’s thighs. She wraps her legs around Alaska, loving how she pushes inside of her so easily. It’s like they were meant to come together like this. They fit so perfectly.

“Better than milk?”

Alaska giggle turns into a moan as she fucks her into the mattress, so hard that the bed squeaks. Katya has to bite her shoulder to stop herself from screaming Alaska’s name.

“Better,” Alaska promises with a grunt, and then she’s coming inside Katya. But Katya doesn’t want her stop. She squeezes her thighs around Alaska’s back, holding her there, and then she’s coming herself. She comes with a silent gasp, Alaska’s name on her tongue.

“I can’t believe you think I’m better than milk,” Katya giggles as Alaska rolls off of her. The cum is dripping out of her, and Katya doesn’t want to move, wants to keep it inside of her.

“You’ve changed me,” Alaska says, and, though she smiles, she sounds serious.

Katya pulls Alaska down by her long hair to steal another kiss. She feels so greedy. How has Katya just had her, but, still, she wants her? Buried deep, deep inside of her? Maybe Katya just loves the idea of being so close to her.

“Tell me you don’t have to leave,” Katya pleads.

Alaska looks down at her and just kisses her instead of saying the words. She doesn’t want to lie to me again, Katya realizes.

They get cleaned up and change into real clothes. When they go out to do the chores, Katya feels Betty’s glowing orange eyes following her.

If Katya were a Christian, she might have sunk down to her knees for the Lord. Instead, as she throws out feed to the chickens, she says a small prayer to the goddesses. Please, let Alaska stay here with me. Please.

Katya might be sixteen years old, but this is the closest thing to love she’s ever felt. Why did she have to fall for the princess of daddy issues?

When she comes back in, Katya sees that Miss. Fame has been talking to Betty. Shit, that pussy cat ratted her out.

“Katya…” Miss. Fame clears her throat. “Alaska, she has to go back. You know that right? She can’t stay here-”

“I know that,” she snaps.

“So, uh, it might be wise for you two to sleep in separate beds…don’t you think, Alaska?”

Alaska walks in and Katya watches as her face heats up. The blood rises to her face too as Katya protectively steps in front of her.

“You’re not even her mom and you never will be,” Katya yells before she even realizes what she’s saying. “You left her, alone. On a planet full of toxic air. So what gives you the right to boss her around? You don’t do anything but babble in Latin and pray to goddesses that don’t listen, y-you crazy chicken lady!” Katya yells and slams the door to her room.

It’s horrible, and she realizes how ungrateful that she must sound.

But Katya’s glad she said it anyway. This is the only friend she’s had in Kansas, and now Miss. Fame is trying to split them up before Alaska even has to leave. Maybe it might have been better if they never met. Never kissed. Never held each other so tenderly.

She starts to gather her things from the drawers and stuff them into her suitcase. All she wants is to go home. Away from nowhere land. Away from the farm. Away from the pain.

“Katya,” Alaska says softly as she opens the door.

Her tarot card tumble to the floor, and she bursts into tears.

“I just…I don’t want you to leave,” Katya cries. “You just came. You just came and now you have to go.”

“I’ll be back,” Alaska promises.

“When?”

“As soon as I’m eighteen, I’ll be legal. I’ll come back for you, Kat, and we’ll hitch hike across the galaxy together.”

“How will you find me?” She sniffles.

“Wait for me in Paris,” Alaska whispers and kisses her.

Katya knows it’s ridiculous, but she believes her anyways. She’s horribly in love, and there’s no potion known to witch kind that can cure her. This is a language that transcends cultures. They both know what it means when Katya pulls Alaska down and kisses her, cheeks wet with tears.

“Can you read our future?” Alaska asks and gestures to the tarot cards.

Katya closes her eyes and hovers her hands over the cards. She flips it over.

“Simulacyum fidei- latin for conjugal faith. Better known as…The Lovers,” Katya explains as she strokes the rainbow at the center, above the conjoined couple. She looks up and meets Alaska’s heated gaze. The cards have never lied to her, although she’s sometimes misread them, but this time it’s clear.

“What does it mean?”

“It means we’re going to be okay, Lasky. We’ll meet again.”

———

DEPARTURE

After Katya’s outburst, Miss. Fame comes to her with a potions book- a white flag. They continue their Latin lessons, but, now, Miss. Fame shows her how the ancient words link to the spells. Katya’s glad she finally spoke up, even though she’s sorry for how it came out.

“I’m sorry for calling you a ‘crazy chicken lady,’” Katya says as she accepts the potions book. “And saying that you aren’t Alaska’s mom. That’s none of my business. I really am grateful for everything that you’ve done for me.”

“No, I am a crazy chicken lady,” Miss. Fame laughs and then her face changes. “Katya, Alaska’s father he…abducted me. Do you understand? He took me, and I didn’t have a choice. So when he gave me the option to leave, so long as I left Alaska, I…”

She sags, and, for once, Miss. Fame looks her age. All one hundred years. Katya gives her a side hug. For all of her faults, Miss. Fame is a good woman.

“Did you tell Alaska?”

“No, I don’t want her to think less of her father. I’d rather she hated me.”

“You have to tell her, though!”

Miss. Fame shakes her head: “I can’t. I know that I lose myself in my Latin recitations and prayers, but it’s because…”

“You’re scared?”

“Because I’m trying to forget, Kat. Forget how they- what he- no, I can never tell Alaska what really happened to me.”

Katya buries her face into Miss. Fame’s shoulder and rubs her back as she cries. There’s so much pain and history that she’ll never understand.

“Forgive her,” she whispers to Alaska that night, as she collapses besides her.

“Why should I?” Alaska grumbles, burying her face between Katya’s breasts. This is their last night together for who knows how long. Katya wants to just fall into blissful sleep, but she has to speak up.

“I…I think she had her reasons,” Katya says truthfully. “She didn’t want to leave you, Alaska, but she had to go back home. Just like you had to come here.”

“Who was she running from?”

Katya bites her lip.

“Was it my dad?”

She doesn’t nod, but she blinks. Alaska rolls over, to stare up at the expanding moon, and sighs. Katya wants to kiss away all the pain on that moonlight soaked face.

They’ve spent this last week together, and Katya’s basking in the glow of Alaska’s touch. Their bodies and minds fit so effortlessly together. How is that she found her soulmate in the middle of Kansas? After the tarot cards, Katya is no longer as afraid for their future. They found each other once. They’ll do it again.

“I have to go,” Alaska says, softly, as she rises to get dressed, and Katya understands that it’s time. They’ve put it off long enough.

Katya presses a golden flask into Alaska’s hands. Alaska’s pink nails curl around the neck of the bottle.

“What’s this?”

“A luck potion- for strength.”

“Is this how witches say ‘I love you?’” Alaska teases as she pulls her in for a kiss.

“No, it’s how I say ‘don’t forget about me.’”

“How could I forget about the best thing in the Milky Way galaxy?”

“Better than milk?” Katya whispers as she hides her face into the curve of Alaska’s neck.

“Of course.”

Katya watches as the spaceship zooms into the darkness of the night. The universe is vast and infinite, stretching before her like the fields, but Katya has faith that the stars will bring them together again.

“Bluebirds singin’ a song. Nothin’ but bluebirds all day long,” Katya sings into the darkness as she cries. “Blue skies, smilin’ at me. Nothin’ but blues skies do I see…wondering when my love will come back to me.”

Katya falls asleep there in the cornfields, and, when she awakens, a blue bird has landed on her broomstick.

[tadpoles-and-daydreams]

I'd like to get in on the free readings you just posted about, if you're still doing them that is. May I have a reading please?

I'm newer to bringing gods into my practice and worship and I feel my adhd is making it terribly foggy and difficult for me to make a solid connection, so I'd like to ask if I'm trying to connect with the wrong gods/goddesses for me.

Thank you for offering your time and energy!~✨️

Yup, I'm still doing them! That post was only posted like an hour ago as I'm typing this, and I didn't get flooded, so no worries. Also just a quick note; my Ko-Fi is at the end of this post, but it's not a weird social pressure to tip. It's for anyone who is financially able and wants to, and so people who want to check it out- whether they're the one receiving the reading or not- can!

"Are they trying to connect with the wrong gods/goddesses?"

STRONG no on this one. LIke 4/5 cards were reversed. (I use upright = yes, reversed = no)

"What should they keep in mind to help make a solid connection to the deities in question?"

Nine of Cups: Wish Come True, Fulfullment, Pleasures. This card is all about abundance; balance in all areas of your life, satisfaction, all the good things! At first this didn't quite make sense but what I think it's trying to say here is… gratitude. Look at the good things around you. Maybe you're judging yourself too harshly, especially if you're seeing other people talk about their connections with their deities. Rather than looking at where you feel you fall short, look at what you already do have. You have them in your life, whether you feel like you're getting the "fireworks" you should have or not! While I won't go into full interpretation paragraphs for them, I did draw a couple clarification cards while writing this. The cards (Knight of Cups upright and Ace of Pentacles reversed) feel like they imply that you're looking more towards the money side of things, and you should be looking towards the emotional side. That could be talking about financial hardship causing you to panic and forget the emotional wealth you have, or it could be talking about the very common problem in the witchy/pagan community of thinking you need to have a fancy altar and top-notch offerings to connect with a deity, when really all you need is yourself and the deities you want to connect with.

This was only one card (which tbh surprised me, normally my deck spits out a LOT more) but I hope it resonated nonetheless! Here's my Ko-Fi if you want to tip, or for those who might want to check it out. Good luck with your deities, I understand how much of a pain ADHD can be as a witch sometimes! I appreciate feedback (even if that's just an ask going "yes it resonated" or "idk what you're talking about funny little card man") but there's never any pressure to do so, especially since some of these readings can get- if accurate- REAL DAMN personal.

[tadpoles-and-daydreams]

Hi hi if you're still doing free readings I'd love one!! I haven't done tarot for myself in a long while bc of energy reasons, and I'm looking to restructure my practice around what I can actually handle on a daily/weekly basis so-- my question for you and the cards is, how can I incorporate more self love into my practice going forward? If you're flooded with asks or otherwise busy, absolutely no worries on this! You gotta take care of you first and foremost :)

Ayo! This took ages to get too- as all the free readings are- but I swear to you all my paid readings are way faster T-T this makes me look so bad because I'm having to prioritized the paid readings lol.

That being said, here you go! As always my Ko-Fi is link at the bottom if you want to tip and are financially able, but no pressure since it's also just there for anyone who might be interested!

"How can they incorporate self love into their craft more?"

Princess of Wands: Creative Expression, Spark, Free Spirit. Be creative! Princess of Wands encourages you to take a look at your practice with renewed enthusiasm and authenticity. Explore areas of your craft you may not be experienced in, learning new things as you go. Bring your creative side into your craft more- whether that's writing, art, crafts, cooking, whatever; it can be made witchy! Remind yourself of your freedom in your craft. It's yours and no one else's, so practice in a way that's unique to you and find joy and love in it. You're the one who created your practice, so give yourself a pat on the back for that!

Nine of Pentacles reversed: Self-Sabotage, Materialistic, Dependency. The parts of this card that stand out to me implies that you're possibly holding yourself to standards that are far too high. Look inward and consider what core beliefs you hold that might be detrimental to your craft as a whole. You don't have to be perfect, and allowing yourself to be a mess might be exactly what you need. Allow yourself to look silly or make mistakes; it happens to everyone.

The Star reversed: Uninspired, In The Dark, Adrift. This work might be tiring, and it's easy to lose focus on your goal- especially on such a monumental task. This is a reminder to keep focusing on it and put in the work to get there. Find ways to put the topic of self-love into as many areas of your craft as you can manage, and be prepared for a less glorious journey than you'd like. Things won't happen overnight, and they won't be flashy- but one day you'll look back and wonder how you didn't notice when you've improved so much!

Here's my Ko-Fi for anyone interested, thank you for the ask and thank you for being so patient since my inbox was so flooded!

[tadpoles-and-daydreams]

Hello! I wanted to try the donation-based reading if you don't mind :) My Query is: "is the incense mixture I am planning to work is suitable for my path? and the magical working ramifications of it"

Thank you so much in advance :)

Hello! I absolutely do not mind, I appreciate it! As always my Ko-Fi is at the bottom, but that's not any weird social pressure to tip- it's for you if you want to and are able, and for anyone who sees this and decides that they'd like to check it out.

Is the incense mixture they're planning to work with suitable for their path?

I asked this twice to be sure and got yes both times!

What are the possible ramifications, both good and bad, of working with this incense mixture?

Queen of Swords: Clever, Meticulous, Intellectual. This incense mixture will likely help you detach from situations emotionally to look at the facts and the facts alone. It could help you in terms of being more honest, being fair, and using your discernment to see past any hidden motives. I feel like there should be an emphasis here on the part of seeing past hidden motives and being particularly honest. Some might call it brutal, but it might be needed, especially if there are hidden motives in your life that you need to see and call out. Overall this incense will likely bring a lot of clarity to your craft and your life overall.

Princess of Swords reversed: Contrarian, Annoyance, Motormouth. This implies that the downside to that is, essentially, that it could be really easy to go too far with the blunt attitude. Being more in touch with your intellectual side and detaching from your emotions can help, but be wary of losing your compassion for others. Be aware of your relationships and how you interact with those around you when using this incense; make a point to be kind!

How can they counteract the energy of the previous card?

Ten of Wands reversed: Martyr, Resentment, Heaviness. This card's advice is to take some time for yourself! Don't be so go-go-go, whether that be in your craft or when it comes to others and their expectations of you. Do what you enjoy, and leave behind responsibilities that no longer serve you and are only stressing you out. Obviously, I mean that within reason- but really! Take some time off and don't break your back for other people and quietly hold onto that resentment.

And... this is the part of the reading that I didn't expect, so apologies if I overexplain. Without going over exactly how I came to the conclusion, because that resulted in a huge paragraph- Loki popped in to give you a few cards. I have absolutely no idea why, but they are very intent on saying something and after confirming literally four times that it's for this reading and that I should put it in this reading I decided I'd just section this off. If you don't want a message from Loki, don't read it! I'd love to know how you felt about this part if you're comfortable, since I've never had any of my deities just pop in like this and while for a paid reading I would message my client and just ask if they want it, the free readings work a little different so I have no plan for that. I have, admittedly, been caught off guard. Leave it to Loki to be predictably unpredictable.

Knight of Wands: Ambition, Risk Taker, Action Oriented. The Knight of Wands, in the context of this question and the other cards, feels like a reminder to use that rational thinking to balance out your impulses. Move forward quickly and don't wait for opportunities to come to you, yes, but don't go running ahead recklessly either!

Seven of Wands: Attack, Challenge, Stand Ground. Don't back down! Seven of Wands is a card of perseverance; fighting for what's yours. Go after what you want, and don't let any self-doubt get in your way. Stand up for yourself and sustain your success.

As always here's my Ko-Fi for anyone who's interested, I hope this reading resonated and was helpful!

[tadpoles-and-daydreams]

Hi! Do you do free love readings?

Heyo! The answer to this is... well, sort of. Yes, I do, but it's better to get a paid one if you care about how quick it'll be answered or guaranteeing your reading gets done. A single shuffle is 5 dollars and generally gets the same amount of cards as one on tumblr (4 or so with a paragraph each), a normal love reading (17 dollars) gets like twice as many cards. I'll explain why free love readings are a "sort of" though-

Most of the time when I post that my readings are open I get flooded with asks (/pos I love it) and I have to work through them slowly for the next few weeks. Because of how I work, I do them based on how much energy they take and my interest in them. I could explain the system but it'd take too long tbh. The point is, love readings are the last ones to get done or they get deleted if they make me uncomfortable/fall under what I won't do. I'm perfectly happy to do them, and would like to get to some of them at some point since I don't have any good love reading examples on tumblr, it's just that they so often fall through the cracks.

So yes, I do free love readings, but it'd probably be easier to just get a paid one because of how long they take and the fact that I admittedly don't always get to them.

[tadpoles-and-daydreams]

(the "consult the frog" button made me smile btw) HELLO, I have a fun, quirky reading request! Literally just thought of it, this is impulsive but low-key serious. Ha, Loki. Okay, without all the details and background story: please ask Loki if he's responsible for the opossum in my life. Yes, we called animal control and the whole nine yards, it still gets in my room at night, every night. My brother was strongly connected with Loki before he passed, so I see Loki as a 'big brother'. If he's not responsible, it's totally cool - like I said, impulse. Also not really mad about it, it makes me laugh, it's a weird cat. My brother also really wanted to take a baby opossum and tame it, but he never did.

Have fun with the light-hearted chaos of this ask. 💕

When seeing the notification for this I was like "What could possibly be considered strange, I highly doubt-" and then was immediately proven wrong, this is absolutely the funniest reading request I've gotten. I'm glad the consult the frog button made you laugh!

alright, as for your reading:

Yep! Three cards, all upright. (I use upright = yes, reversed = no for yes/no.) I asked if they had anything to say about it, and it's a no. It seems Loki is just having fun lol. It feels odd to do such a short reading, but Loki was pretty clear that there was nothing more to say so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

As always, I'll link my Ko-Fi for anyone who wants to check my readings out or anyone who wants to tip for their reading, but there's no pressure! Especially since this one was so damn short I'm still salty about that it feels wrong to just say "yeah lol it's Loki" and end the post. Which.... feels like a very Loki thing to do, actually.

[tadpoles-and-daydreams]

My blog I usually use for this side of tumblr is learninglore!! Sorry it won’t let me change it lol Couldn’t donate much but hope my little bit helps.

If you’re still doing free readings, I’d appreciate one with Hel! Just if there’s anything She wants to tell me. Thank you!

Heyo! Thank you so much for tipping, I appreciate it; no such thing as too little, don't worry. As always my Ko-Fi's at the end for anyone interested in my readings, etc, etc, the usual spiel which you would think I have copied somewhere by now- And thank you for sending in the ask! I've never met Hel and she was very quick and precise with the cards so :D

"Anything to say?"

Six of Cups reversed: Rose-Colored Glasses, Idealistic, Childhood Trauma. Sometimes, living in the past feels easier. Or, maybe, living in an idealized version of what is. You're missing out on reality, which is messy and more difficult but far more beautiful! I feel like this card, paired with the others, has a connotation of that view being turned on yourself; you're trying to ignore your wounds and how your past has affected you as a person. Trying to be more 'perfect' than you realistically can be. There are parts of you that you don't want to look at, maybe. This card is a call to take off the blindfold and look at those parts, especially the ones you hate, and treat them with compassion. Take care of them like you would anyone else who'd been through some shit; you deserve it too.

Queen of Swords reversed: Ice Queen, Judgmental, Detached. Queen of Swords reversed has a duality that is, admittedly, a bit frustrating as a tarot reader- but oddly enough I think both interpretations apply here. One interpretation is that you're too caught up in your emotions, and you need to slow down and think objectively. Look at the facts rather than what your emotions want to see. On the other hand, this card holds the connotation of being not emotional enough, losing compassion, and being incredibly harsh and judgemental in the process. Assuming the cards are accurate, I think it's likely that this applies too; to yourself. You're being cold, maybe outright cruel, to yourself and judging yourself far too harshly.

Princess of Wands reversed: Deflation, Freedom to Fail, Learning Experience. Let yourself fail. Seriously, that's what this card is saying. Things have been hard, perfectionism has been running rampant, and it's miserable. Cut yourself some slack, let yourself fall, and get back up again when you can. You're allowed to be imperfect, this whole reading has had the feeling of telling you to embrace your flaws and failures; you're worthy of love and worthy of space in this world! Trust the process; you're not done yet.

The Lovers: Love, Alignment, Choices. The Lovers is an ending on a good note; it's a card that, while representing relationships with others, can also represent your relationship with yourself. This feels like it's meant to tell you that, while this reading has- if accurate- been one big callout post from Hel, it's because doing work in this area will bring a strong sense of self love and self worth. Being honest with yourself, learning to love the parts of yourself that you don't like; it's a powerful thing. Hel is encouraging that. Just because something is seen as a failure doesn't mean it doesn't deserve love.

Aright, that's the reading! Thank you for sending in the ask, this was a joy to do and Hel does not mince her words clearly. /pos As always here's my Ko-Fi for anyone interested!

[tadpoles-and-daydreams]

Are you still doing free readings? You keep popping up and I'm curious if my dieties want you to relay a message to me? If you aren't doing anymore free readings that's totally cool, just thought I'd ask. (P.S. my dieties are Nyx, Persephone, and Apollo)

Hello! I'm doing them a little bit differently now than when you sent in this ask, but I am still doing them! Cue the usual spiel about my Ko-Fi being at the end if you want to tip but it's zero pressure, since it's also just for whoever is interested in checking my longer paid readings out. Nyx didn't have anything to say, but Persephone and Apollo both did!

Persephone

The Tower reversed: Resisting change, averting disaster, avoiding tragedy. The Tower reversed has a couple of interpretations, and I've confirmed with Persephone that it- at least according to my cards- is meant to be both. You may have narrowly avoided some sort of major disaster, and it's important to learn from that so it doesn't happen again! Think about what you've learned from recent events and how to apply them to whatever is to come. The other interpretation is that you're currently delaying an inevitable change or loss. It's scary, or it hurts, and it's easy to just keep trying and trying to save whatever it is- it's time to let go. Face this event head-on, it will be change for the better even if it's change that's hard. If that loss or change has already happened, The Tower is telling you not to go back there and try to rebuild whatever you had before.

Apollo

Apollo flipped these cards so quickly I barely even got to shuffle! He's apparently feeling very enthusiastic about this lol.

Seven of Pentacles: Patience, Investment, Sustainability. You're starting to see hard work and time pay off! With the connotation pentacles has with finances, this is likely to be about money- but it's not just about money, it's about putting your blood, sweat, and tears into something you're passionate about! Don't get impatient just because you're starting to see results and they may not be as flashy as you want. You're in it for the long haul, and this will pay off. Just keep going, and trust that it will work. This may take some time, but don't be discouraged.

Eight of Swords: Limitation, Confinement, Restriction. This is a card of sheer and utter tunnel-vision. You're likely feeling like trapped, and it's impossible to get out of whatever rut you're in. This isn't true- you have all the tools you need! What's restricted is less the situation, and more your perspective of it. You're limiting your options by limiting your thinking. Sometimes, opportunities don't look like what you expect them too. Don't ask anyone's permission, you don't need it; continue forward without trapping yourself. I confirmed with the Apollo that it's not too victim blamey, but I still feel the need to clarify; this may come across as harsher than I would if I knew what this was about! Some entrapments are real, but Apollo is being very clear that whatever this card about is not.

Here's my Ko-Fi if you'd like to tip or for whoever wants to check it out, and thank you for the ask!

[tadpoles-and-daydreams]

aye, could i please have a free reading? 2-4 cards advice about my current spiritual/deity work? thank you!

Heyo! 2-4 is the equivalent of a single shuffle reading, so I did exactly that, which most of the free readings are. Also just a quick note; my Ko-Fi is at the end of this post, but it's not a weird social pressure to tip. It's for anyone who is financially able and wants to, and so people who want to check it out- whether they're the one receiving the reading or not- can!

"Can you give me a few cards about their spiritual/deity work?"

Nine Of Swords reversed: Mindfulness, Conscious Choices, Thought Patterns. This card, whether it's a pat on the back for something you're already doing or advice to do this because you aren't, is all about having the tools to manage your emotions. You're working to figure out how to manage your thoughts and emotions, especially anxiety. It's normal to feel stress, to feel sadness and the whole range of human emotions; you're able, or you will be able, to feel those emotions naturally and handle them! You can take on the storm of emotions you need to feel, and you're able to recognize negative thought patterns that are leading you into unnecessary spirals. This feels like a card basically saying that your deities are proud of how far you've come :D You may not be all the way there yet, but it feels like you've already started the process of learning and come a long way. (However if that doesn't resonate, it's likely advice!)

Seven of Swords reversed: Escape, Clearing Conscience, Reveal. Tired of keeping secrets, the seven of swords is a card telling you to embrace radical honesty. Be your most authentic self, there's no need to just complacently play a role you were given! This could be a warning not to lie, but it feels more to me like proof that you're breaking free of a pattern of lies. It doesn't have to mean what people typically think of when they hear that word, though- things like masking, keeping your own wants and needs quiet to appease others, and just overall not being willing to be yourself around others- and even yourself- falls under this. Lies don't have to be malicious. Maybe you've recently begun to accept a part of you and your spirituality that previously was kept under lock and key. Put in the work to build new, healthier patterns, and you'll find your dreams are a lot easier to achieve than you thought they were.

Overall, it sounds like you're going places! You've got work ahead, but you've already come so far and you're willing to put in more; your spirituality is your own, remember that. Overall it feels like your deities are definitely cheering you on throughout the whole process, you've got this :D If you don't currently work with any deities, it might be deities you'll work with in the future, I just felt like maybe I should put that just in case.

I hope this resonated, even if it was just two cards! I appreciate feedback (even if that's just an ask going "yes it resonated" or "idk what you're talking about funny little card man") but there's never any pressure to do so, especially since some of these readings can get- if accurate- REAL DAMN personal. Here's the Ko-Fi link like I said, good luck with your practice and deity work!

[tadpoles-and-daydreams]

Hey! I have a big ask. :^) u don't have to answer if u don't want to.

1. Does athena want to work with me?

2. Does freyja want to work with me?

3. How do I get further in my spiritual practice?

Hi anon! thank you for the ask :D I don't normally do multiple questions but since only one was more complex than a yes/no I can! As always my Ko-Fi is at the bottom for anyone who wants to tip for their readings or anyone interested in checking out my Ko-Fi readings.

Athena: Yes, she does!

Freyja: No, not right now. I asked if it's a matter of "yet" and she did confirm that though! So not yet, but someday.

What can they do to get further in their spiritual practice? (I also said Athena and Freyja could help with this answer if they wanted to, but they didn't have to. I feel like this was nearly all from Athena, if not all.)

King of Swords: Clarity, Mental Strength, Cerebral. Use your discernment! The King of Swords is logical, intellectual, and encourages you to detach yourself from your emotions when needed to make an objective decision. To me this card sounds like a call to trust in your own experience, and to keep yourself steady using intellect above emotions.

The Sun reversed: Lackluster, Cloudy, Unrealistic. Paired with the first card, I'm inclined to lean more towards the idea that The Sun reversed is implying unrealistic expectations of your craft. You might feel like your craft isn't much compared to what you see online, and The Sun reversed is telling you... it doesn't need to. In reality, some of the most valuable parts of your craft will be mundane and normal to you.

The Heirophant: Conventional, Institution, Tradition. The Heirophant is all about tradition and a community based around rules. It can represent learning from a mentor, which may be Athena, or from your ancestors and your past. Grounding yourself in structure, finding a sense of community, and learning all that you can; that's the advice here. I'm not picking up on any one interpretation as particularly correct, so this card is written a bit messily by my standards, so it may be a mix of things and if this doesn't resonate I encourage you to look into the card yourself and see if you can find something I may have missed!

Overall, it feels like structure and logic is what's being encouraged.

"Feelings are just as valid as logic, but sometimes they can be much more fragile, so protect them with objectivity and use your wisdom to your advantage." -Athena (I don't normally do typed out messages in these but??? She had smth to say lol.)

As always, here's my Ko-Fi!

[tadpoles-and-daydreams]

Hi, how r u ?

I am HS and I want to know will my meeting with MS in july strength the friendship?

Thanks

Alright, this one is a really simply yes/no but I decided I'd also interpret the meaning of the card as well. As always my Ko-Fi is at the end for anyone who is wants to (and is financially able to) tip, as well as just anyone who's interested, but that doesn't mean you have to tip. It's just how I promote my readings^^

"Will their meeting with this person strengthen their friendship?"

Yes, Five of Cups! Five of cups seems like a "bad" card right away, but with the context of yes, I feel like it's more of a gentle call to let go of whatever past issues the friendship has had. It implies that your expectations weren't met at some point, or there's been some period of upset. You're dealing with a lot of resentment towards your friend, maybe, and it's okay to be upset! Take the time to feel those feelings, they deserve to be listened to. That being said- do so to heal. This upset, whatever it was, is a lesson learned and you're a wiser and more mature person because of it. Shift your perspective to the present and the future, and allow the friendship to grow without the past weighing it down. You'd be surprised!

Thank you for the ask! This one was fun and even taught me some stuff. As always, I appreciate any feedback even if it's just a quick reply/reblog/ask saying if it resonated at all, or just a confirmation that you saw the reading. Here's my Ko-Fi if you'd like to tip, or for anyone who's interested in checking out my longer paid readings!

[tadpoles-and-daydreams]

Thank you for the reading. I sometimes couldn't understand tho. The truth thing was a bit difficult to understand for me, but that's okay. Don't worry about it. I thank you for the reading and I'm so glad and happy you did it for me.

Mcme

Of course! Thank you for sending in the ask^_^ It was actually my first reading with multiple deities, so it taught me how to do that properly which is good because I just got my first request for a paid one with multiple deities.

Plus, as far as the bit I think you're talking about, that was near the end of the reading where I admit I was getting tired T-T I probably could have articulated it better, but I'd already spent more time on it than I normally do on free readings. (Which is absolutely no issue, that was my own choice because it was a multiple deity reading and I needed the practice! all of this is /positive)

[ultimateanthropoll]

RELEASE THE BRACKET

I couldn't find out how to flip the second one lol

The pairings were decided mostly on vibes alone (don't ask me what weird connections my brain makes I don't know either) and also on Rule Of Funny. It'll be split up into four parts which will release... I don't know when because classes started.

Anyway matches under the cut!

SIDE A:

Juan Carlos Bodoque (31 Minutos) vs. Duck (dhmis)

Arte Fact (Webkinz) vs. Kermit the Frog (The Muppets)

Bugs Bunny (Looney Tunes) vs. Roger Rabbit (Who framed Roger Rabbit)

Garfield the Deals Warlock (The Adventure Zone) vs. Jerry (Tom and Jerry)

Max Goof (A Goofy Movie) vs. Boris the Wolf (Bendy and the Ink Machine)

Xenia (Linux mascot) vs. Diane Foxington (The Bad Guys)

Master Tigress (Kung Fu Panda) vs. Gia (Madagascar 3)

Shadow the Hedgehog (Sonic the Hedgehog) vs. Mordecai Heller (Lackadaisy)

SIDE B:

Louis (Beastars) vs. Gwen (Spiritfarer)

Prince Sidon (The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild) vs. Squidward (Spongebob Squarepants)

Renamon (Digimon) vs. Lucario (Pokemon: Lucario and the mystery of mew)

Kajortoq (No Evil) vs. Melody Amaranth (Super Lesbian Animal rpg)

Baron Humbert von Gikkingen (The Cat Returns) vs. Captain Amelia (Treasure Planet)

Fox McCloud (Starfox) vs. Red Savarin (Solatorbo: Red the Hunter)

Krtek the Mole (Krtek the Mole) vs. Flipflop (Paranatural)

Kabbu (Bug Fables) vs. Chicory (Chicory: A Colorful Tale)

SIDE C:

Nico the Catboy (Adventure Time oc) vs. Perry the Platypus (Phineas and Ferb)

Death (Puss in Boots: The Last Wish) vs. Loona (Helluva Boss)

Ralsei (Deltarune) vs. Webber the Indigestible (Don't Starve Together)

Swampy (Where's my Water) vs. Crash Bandicoot (Crash Bandicoot)

Geronimo Stilton (Geronimo Stilton) vs. Basil of Baker Street (The Great Mouse Detective)

Nick Nocturne (Night Mind) vs. Nick Wilde (Zootopia)

Bandit Heeler (Bluey) vs. Ratboy Genius (Ratboy Genius)

Hajime Tanaka (Odd Taxi) vs. Wolfrun (PreCure)

SIDE D:

Tarot (Housepets) vs. Mason (Duncan and Eddy)

Mae Borowski (Night in the Woods) vs. The Empress (A Hat in Time)

Meowscles (Fortnite) vs. Woodcutter Bear (Rhythm Heaven)

Mother Glory (Friends at the Table) vs. Haida (Aggretsuko)

Bec Noir (Homestuck) vs. Piglin (Minecraft)

Erma Felna (Albedo Anthropomorphics) vs. Nyanta (Log Horizon)

Scias (Breath of Fire) vs. Sly Cooper (Sly Cooper)

Giovanni (Night on the Galactic Railroad) vs. Lord Arum (The Penumbra Podcast)