#Finn Shelby fan fiction

[novashelby]

The Balls in Our Courts-Chapter Twenty-Four

Paring: Tommy Shelby x OC x Finn

Warnings: Reference to abuse, death, and swearing. Please be mindful of the story tags. This is 100% dark Tommy

Chapter Summary: Amelia completes match one of three, and meets someone who knew her brother. Tommy doesn't like this Irish stepping on his toes...or talking to what is his....

Ao3

Wattpad

I am sorry for this chapter. I feel it isn't that wonderful.

[little-space-babe]

Thank you !

The amount of support I receive from the fandom is mind blowing, so I just wanted to let you guys know that I really appreciate it. So, while I am still working on: Our Violent Delights: A Peaky Blinders Story. Just let me know is there anything type of content you guys would like to see in the meanwhile.

[look-at-the-soul]

I know Halloween is over, but this is one of those stories you’ll remember for an eternity after reading it, it’s so so good! You don’t wanna miss it!

The Swimming Lesson

Finn Shelby x Adeline (OC)

Summary: Adeline makes a terrible mistake when she underestimates the vengeful nature of the youngest Shelby brother.

Author's Note: A lovely anon requested a dark!Finn fic. I included the John love triangle bc it added motivation. I hope you enjoy it!

Warnings: dark fic 💀, drinking, misogyny, murder

“Finn, say something,” Adeline urged her friend, the confession of a budding relationship with his brother John still hanging in the air between them.

Attempting to forget the refusal of his kiss, Finn stopped pacing along the bank of the pond as an irresistible notion came to him. “Will you go for a swim with me?” he asked.

Adeline paused, “So, you’re not upset about John?”

Finn shook his head as he proclaimed, “I don’t want to talk about that anymore. I’d like to have some fun with you instead.”

Adeline held her breath as she felt him take her hand in his, wanting to believe he was happy for her. However, something cried out within her at the rough grasp of Finn’s touch, the distant look in his eyes which had turned dark as obsidian glass. “You want to go in there?” she asked carefully, raising one eyebrow in a look of uncertainty.

“Why not? Are you afraid?” Finn taunted with a mischievous grin.

She peered down into the cold, murky water and gulped. “You know I can’t swim."

“You going to let that stop you when you have me with you?” he urged. Placing a hand to her lower back, he pushed her closer to the uninviting water.

“I suppose a quick dip couldn’t hurt,” she conceded as she removed her shoes.

“That’s my girl,” Finn praised, relishing the sound of it on his tongue. He watched with lecherous delight as she stripped her stockings down her legs, discarding them beside her hat and shawl before tentatively slipping her toes beneath the water. Modestly gathering the hem of her white dress in one hand, she tip toed forward, a pathetic squeal escaping her lips as she felt a fish skim against her calf beneath the thick green algae.

Finn went first with his back to the pond, holding her hand as she ventured into his waiting arms. He was captivated by every intake of breath and needy squeeze of her fingers against his. She was at his mercy and he relished every second of it. When her foot faltered along the slimy bottom where it sloped downward into greater depths, she cried out “Finn, I’m slipping!”

“S’alright, I’ve got you,” he replied confidently, flexing the muscles in his arms for her benefit.

“Can’t go much further,” she warned, biting her lip. The look in her eye begged for understanding, a sliver of mercy, but Finn only tugged at her wrists more insistently.

“Let’s try a lesson, shall we?” he said with a look of amusement.

“No, no, please!” her voice trilled anxiously.

“C’mon, you’re a big girl, you can do it,” he insisted, hands moving to clutch her waist and pull her into the center of the pond with him. She released a frightened cry as he did so, grappling onto his shoulders as she felt herself become weightless. 

“Finn! Finn, this isn’t funny!” she wailed, realizing she could neither see nor feel the bottom to ease her fears.

“Relax,” he commanded firmly as he pried her hands from around his neck. He chuckled inwardly at the way her nails clawed at his bare back and forearms, thinking of the suggestive tales he could tell.

Without warning, he turned her onto her back in one swift movement, hushing her whimpers as her hair dipped and swirled in the water. “I taught all my nieces and nephews this way,” he informed her, patting her dampened locks down gently. His fingers slowly crept along her arms, unfurling them from her chest so they reached out from her body like a crucifix. She couldn’t say if it was the chill from the water or his hands dipping perilously close to the curve of her breasts, but she shivered beneath his touch.

To her surprise she found herself floating easily, ears submerged below the water line listening to the muffled sound of her heartbeat thumping in her chest. Finn’s face hovered above her imposingly and a nervous twitch pulled at her cheeks. She watched Finn’s mouth moving out of synch with his words she could barely hear through cotton stuffed ears. Her brow furrowed as she tried to connect the words she thought he'd said, “I loved you." They made her chest rise and fall quickly with uneven breath, disturbing her balance. Something about the slight sneer of his lip and the intensity of his gaze made her tense suddenly, muscles clenching until her middle began sinking downward precariously.

Then Finn reached a large hand beneath her lower back to support her. With his opposite hand grasping under her chin, he elevated her face toward the heavens so she might breathe evenly again and she sighed in grateful relief. Eyes fluttering against the breeze, Finn swore she batted her lashes at him in that moment. “You’re so beautiful,” he couldn’t help mumbling, his Adam’s apple bobbing in desire. Despite their proximity, he wondered if he had actually said it aloud. The moment of perfect silence stretched on as he cradled her into him adoringly, not a ripple to be seen all around them. 

The peace soon shattered with the force of Adeline’s impish laughter which forced her chin from his hold. Finn’s jaw clenched as he suffered the indignity of her rejection for the second time that day. The shred of affection for her dissipated with the faint echo of her voice as it skipped over the water. His resolve returned as he became more certain than ever of his decision.

Adeline bit her lip as she noted the look of displeasure cross his face and wiggled beneath Finn’s grasp.  Attempting to right herself in the water was a useless endeavor, however, as Finn kept her prostrated before him. Recapturing her cheeks with his long fingers, he pressed into her flesh slightly as he scolded, “Wait, we’re not finished." Then he queried softly, "Do you trust me?” 

“I-I do,” she affirmed, not knowing how else to respond. She screwed her eyes shut in concentration before exhaling shakily, “What are you going to teach me?”

Finn smirked at her obedience, knowing she’d sink like a stone without his aid, her fate literally in his hands. Leaning over to brush his nose against the shell of her ear, he whispered, “Oh, this is a lesson you won’t forget.” He allowed himself a moment to savor the feeling of his lips pressed firmly to her temple the way he imagined he might after making love to her. He swallowed harshly as he realized that could never be. Adeline did not want him. The hours spent in her company had been a lie and he felt like a fool. With that thought, he released her to the murky depths where she belonged.

Her eyes shot open in abject fear as she felt herself falling, mouth gaping in shock as she felt his strong hands shove her toward a watery grave. The air from her lungs escaped to the surface in massive bubbles as she attempted to cry out. Arms and legs fumbling in uncoordinated panic, she resurfaced momentarily. Her hands desperately grasped for a hold, fingertips brushing Finn's ever so slightly. "Now you want me?" he taunted.

Swimming an arm's length away to watch the look of betrayal and horror on her face, he felt righteously vindicated. Closing his eyes, he listened to her jagged screams pierce the air, sending the birds from the trees in alert. Then he paddled back to the shore, barely registering her torturous fight, thrashing in the dark waters until exhaustion overtook her weakened body.

Sitting upon the muddy bank, he witnessed her final struggle as she silently slipped beneath the algea, white dress billowing above her like a cloud. The ripples left behind by her futile attempt at survival, beating against the shore in one last, quiet protest. Finn’s breathing came calmly and evenly as he thought of walking home to sit by the fire. His sopping wet clothes clung to his body in the way her perfume still hovered in cloying sweetness and he longed to be rid of the sensation. 

The late sun had gone, dipping below the horizon in tranquil undulations of pink and orange. As Finn looked over the hazy water with a blank stare, a surge of pride swept through him. The powerlessness he’d felt earlier, washed away with the mocking sounds of Adeline’s laughter. As he gathered his shirt and cap, he closed his eyes to relive the sounds of the splashing and screams, trying not to forget their satisfying melody.

---------------

Tag list:

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[izabesworld]

Roma attitudes and how to present us in your writing.

The top of this piece primarily discusses negative stereotypes in writings, so you can understand why these aren’t really true, and the bottom has a header which you can read to see how to present us as we are.

FOR MORE READ THIS.

Do I think this piece will be groundbreaking? Absolutely not. Do I hope this piece will prevent AT LEAST one writer from making a common mistake in their writing? Absolutely.

I want to start of with Roma Family Loyalty. This is something people are eager to show in their writing, presenting family units as something that is powerful and strong, which is great. However, like all families, we have limits.

A popular mistake in Peaky Blinder fanfiction is the misuse of this loyalty. It’s not shown in celebration, we don’t see Roma characters celebrating character achievements to the small things like better results in school and moving up in a business.

However, what we do see is family loyalty in a way that portrays us as violent. We read about a family member killing a character, and don’t see the backlash the character should receive. We don’t see the distrust you now feel for that person, we don’t see the problems that now arise. Violence committed by Roma is such a common topic in fan-fiction, when in fact, it is very rare.

Of course, the Peaky Blinders series is filled with blood, guns and knives but it’s also filled with Aunt Pol’s love of God, it’s filled with Arthur’s character change, it has Ada’s moving on from old family ways for a better life for herself and her children. All things that would’ve been celebrated.

A Roma family would’ve been ecstatic to see the change in Arthur. It would’ve been celebrated and praised, not pushed off and ignored. It’s not something that happened over night, it required dedication and support from those closest.

You often see scenes in “Shelby Sister” series where the Shelby Sister in question is afraid of Aunt Pol and Tommy because she gets beat. When this too, isn’t a reality.

Of course, it does still happen, and I don’t want to dismiss ANYONE who is a victim of this time of punishment, however, in Roma it’s extremely uncommon. (We are more creative).

When in the series has Aunt Pol been portrayed as someone who beats Finn as punishment? When Finn smoked that cigarette, he received a tap to the head and a word later. He was not beaten, so why is it done in fiction?

Roma families protect their family, they do not beat them. (Still not trying to dismiss anyone who was a child beat by their Roma family, this is just an in general <3). DESPITE the times they lived in where this was considered normal.

We are not genetically violent. We do not grow and and think “guns are okay”. In our world, they are not. At the time, everybody owned a gun, however, we knew the consequences of using one. It wasn’t a first option, nor was it really an option at all.

Selling Family Members?

We do not sell family members. This one is a BIG one for me.

We do not get in debt with another Roma family and offer daughters to solve that debt. We speak to them… Like everyone else? I’m not sure where selling Roma children has come from.

We do not offer out children to random Roma families. We do not meet a wealthy Roma man and think, “yes, I will sell my daughter to him”.

Yes, we do have a history of arranged marriages, and they do still happen today, within reason. We do not marry happy people with happy relationships. We do not marry people who do not want a partner. We do not marry people because they’re “too crazy”.

We marry people with what’s best for them. We ask people what is that family like? Where do they travel? Is there any significant history in that family I should be aware of? Families spend MONTHS even YEARS getting to know the other family beforehand, asking around and getting to know them.

Esme and John was a one off thing, and was a marriage I don’t believe was presented right. The Shelby’s and Lee’s were already familiar with each other, having spent years of connections. Esme needed a husband, and John needed a wife. Esme was not quickly given away at convenience, do you truly think families would allow that??

Our whole lives do not revolve around spirituality and thinking we are being followed by ghosts. We do not live in a constant state of paranoia — it’s unrealistic.

Of course, we dabble into it once in a while, we explore what we can’t see and test the waters, but we are not running around believing there is a bad omen behind us.

Reading People.

Honestly, I do believe this is also something exaggerated in people when writing. We don’t sit and analyse you when we first meet you, but we do try to find out about you before we begin sharing details of ourselves.

We don’t go, “oh, she scratched her nose, she’s a pathological liar”, but we do go, “he’s quite fidgety, perhaps he’s uncomfortable”.

Yet we do still make mistakes, we are not upper beings who know all and do all. We do still make bad friends, and become close with people we do not truly know, despite the fact we thought we knew them.

We do still get in arguments and upsetting conversations, we are not immune to emotions.

Enough of the negative.

I’ll be blunt and honest, we do still make mistakes. We will still get in silly fights, we do still push people a little bit too far, which is normal, we are all human, no?

Roma feel emotions, we get sad when our day isn’t going right, and feel happy when our dinner came out perfectly cooked. We feel love for those closest to us, and feel an intense amount of care for them.

We have friends, lots of friends. Sometimes they’re only Roma friends, other times we meet them in primary school.

We have family celebrations, where we thank musicians by licking money (notes 💴) and sticking them to their foreheads.

We have horses, often not many but us usually a family will have one.

We are not natural riders. Of course we do pick it up quite quickly, having seen those around us do it so often, however we do make mistakes. We do fall off our horses, and we get upset when we do, because it hurts and we’re human. We do have good days with our horses, where we are content and happy.

We make AMAZING meals with cabbage, this could be a whole post in itself. However, we aren’t too good with cooking bread, (for some odd reason?).

We sit with our families and talk about our days. Yes there is secrets, but we do still discuss “why on earth have they changed that shop?”

Just remember when writing us, we are regular human beings, and I think you’ll do okay! <3

[peakypolly]

Hello to each and everyone of you who stumbles upon this blog! My name is Kat, I'm 21 years old from the U.S and I love Peaky Blinders!

I want to use this blog to make friends with similar interests, establish a better writing technique, and talk about all things Peaky related.

Some rules:

No fighting, nasty comments, or bullying/harassment are allowed on this page!

No racism, homophobia, antisemitism, or anything hateful towards any members of any community or you will be blocked

Right now I do not write smut because I'm just not comfortable in my ability to do so but I might in the future

My requests are open! Here are the characters I write for:

Tommy Shelby

Arthur Shelby

John Shelby

Finn Shelby

Ada Thorne

Polly Gray

Michael Gray

Alfie Solomons

Bonnie Gold

Isaiah Jesus

Newly added:

Aberama Gold

I can do Headcanons, One-Shots, Preferences, and Imagines

I will not write incest, and all characters must be 18+ (Finn seasons 4-6 scenarios only) I will also not write any r@pe or S/A content (really abuse of any kind unless it is only eluded to as a past event)!! It makes me uncomfortable and I want this blog to be a safe space for all!

I will take requests for characters not listed but they may not be granted if I feel I don't know how the character would respond to the scenario in the request/ don't know how to write them!

I am new to writing fan fiction so please bare with me as I learn, I hope to be able to bring justice to how your favorite character is written!

Thank you for reading and have a lovely day!

[ijustwant2write]

'This was supposed to be different.'-Finn Shelby x Reader

(GIF credit to @siriuslyshewrote)

MASTERLIST

Requested by anonymous: 'Hi! If you are taking requests can I ask for Finn Shelby and numbers 13, 18 and 19 from the prompt list? My mind went from wanting something romantic to let's create chaos with Finn and try and fail to hide it from his family lol'

Characters: Finn Shelby x Reader, mentions of Shelby family

Meanings: (Y/N)=Your name

(Y/L/N)=Your last name

Warnings: Swearing, arguing, fluff

13) Well, this is romantic

18) Everyone is staring

19) They definitely heard us

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

(Y/N) held back a sigh as she felt another large drop of water hit her head, shivering in the cold despite being wrapped up in a coat and having her boyfriend's arms around her. She didn't want to upset Finn, he had tried really heard, but she just wasn't having a good time.

"Well, this romantic." (Y/N) tried to lighten the mood.

"I'm sorry, I didn't even think about the weather."

Finn had showed up at (Y/N)'s door that morning, having planned a spontaneous picnic date. She had been delighted, he was so cute with his basket of food and blanket wrapped under his arm. But only minutes after they found a spot, settling down and digging into the sandwiches, the rain started to pour. They haphazardly picked up the blanket with the food and basket inside, running for the shelter of the trees, which wasn't doing much in keeping them dry.

"Finn, I don't think the rain is going to stop."

"It might. Let's give it another five minutes."

"You said that fifteen minutes ago."

"Do you want to go home?"

She nodded."I appreciate this my love, but I don't think we should stay out in the rain, we'll get cold."

She didn't like seeing how down he was about this. It wasn't his fault that the rain came, he just hadn't thought to check the weather. (Y/N) smiled up at him, pulling his face towards hers by the back of his neck, and kissing him. She was happy to see him smile back, standing up and offering a hand out to him before they ran back to the car.

It was almost as if the weather was mocking the couple, because when they returned to Small Heath the sun was shining. Finn whined and moaned, making his girlfriend laugh. Instead of heading home, Finn took a sharp turn, making (Y/N) grab onto the inside of the car. She had no idea where he was going, he wouldn't tell her. He parked up by the side of the road by a field, getting out without a word.

"And what are we doing now?" (Y/N) asked as he opened her door.

"Well, we need to finish our picnic."

"I suppose we do. You know what, Finn?"

"What?"

"You really are a hopeless romantic."

Luckily the couple were able to spend the rest of the afternoon finishing their food in the sun. They were so incredibly loved up, and although you could say it was young love, there was definitely a slither of maturity in them both that reflected off of each other. They both found that they had been thinking more about their futures since they decided to become serious. Of course both had though about marriage, what sort of house they might want to live in, basic ideas of their future, but that was before they had each other. The couple had been so giddy and bashful the first time they spoke about the topic of their possible future; the idea of being with each other everyday was very exciting.

The only problem was that the rest of the Shelby's didn't actually know about (Y/N). This had nothing to do with Finn being ashamed of her, or wanting to hide what they had. They never asked for one, they never even asked Finn how his day was. And when he finally tried to speak up about it, his family only spat back at him, saying to marry a woman who didn't like the life, or tease about how he was still a virgin and was making this up to make them think otherwise. He stopped trying, he was happy with his relationship as it was, why let his family ruin it?

(Y/N) had been hurt at first, for quite a while actually. She thought Finn was lying. Her friends had always said about how much boys lie just so they could have their way with you. But Finn wouldn't be taking her out on dates, getting her presents or simply just talking to each other if he wanted a quick shag. He was a Shelby, it was easy for him. And that was another thing that worried (Y/N). If the family didn't like her, and Finn chose them over her, he could easily have another girl on his arm within a day. She didn't voice her opinion a lot (which she should have done), she knew it was hard being part of the Shelby family. However, her love for him was indescribable, (Y/N) had had silly crushes in the past, been out with a few boys but she never felt the way she did about Finn with any of them.

After Finn dropped (Y/N) home, the hardest part of any day, his whole demeanor changed. He didn't want to see his moody family after such a pleasant day. He also wished he could boast about his gorgeous girlfriend. They would love her if they gave (Y/N) the chance.

"Where have you been?" Polly asked as soon as he stepped through the door.

Finn sighed as he took off his coat and hat."Out with my mates."

"A likely story. Come on, your brothers are waiting."ct4

Of course they were, it was no doubt a family meeting. He slumped towards the front room, falling back into the spare spot on the sofa.

"Here he is, fucking finally." Arthur bellowed.

"No one told me there was a meeting."

"You weren't even nearby, no one could find you. Where were you?"

"I just told Pol, I was with my friends."

Tommy huffed."It doesn't matter where he's been. Let's get on with it."

As they began the meeting, Finn could feel and the doom and gloom seeping into himself. It was so depressing here sometimes. He knew he should he grateful for what his brothers provided them with but it didn't come without danger. If he wasn't so sure (Y/N) could handle herself (and his family) he wouldn't have started dating her. He realised he had to keep her safe, teach her a few things about self defence, which he had prayed wouldn't scare her off.

"Whatever girl you're seeing, forget about her." Polly told Finn after the meeting.

Not this again.

"Why don't any of you ever believe what I say?"

"Because your smile wiped off your face as soon as you stepped into the house. And you don't smile like that around your 'mates'."

"Alright, so if I have a girl, why should I do what you say? What if we're happy together?"

"She likes being with a Shelby, it's the name, Finn."

"So no one will like me for me, right?"

"No, Finn I didn't mean-"

Finn brushed past her and headed upstairs."Night Pol."

He was restless that night, tossing and turning but finding no peace. He felt slightly bad for how he spoke to his aunt, but she could sometimes be just as bad as the others. All he wanted to do was see (Y/N), then he would be at comfort.

Finn wouldn't have to wait as long as he thought. The next morning he was alone in the house until someone knocked on the door. Not a lot of people would have the nerve to knock on a Shelby's door, making him cautious. When he slowly opened the door to see (Y/N) he was both surprised and ecstatic to see her.

"What are you doing here love?" he asked with a grin on his face.

"If you weren't smiling, I would have been offended at that question."

"Sorry, but you know you shouldn't have come without telling me."

It had become a rule to not meet at Finn's house, in case his family saw her before him and scared her off, or were just plain rude to her.

"Well, I had to return this." she held up his pocket watch."Found in beside mum's flower bed."

Finn took it from her, he hadn't even realised he lost it."Oh, thanks. What would I do without you?"

He leaned down to peck her on the lips, noticing her smile dropped slightly when they pulled away.

"(Y/N), what's wrong? I know when you're sad."

"I just wanted to talk to you about something."

"Fuck, you're not pregnant are you?"

"No! Can I please come inside?"

Finn glanced behind him, despite no one else being home. They wouldn't be back for a few hours, he was safe. Standing back, he gestured for her to step inside, watching as she looked around the place. She had never seen the inside of Finn's house before, trying to take it all in, in case the opportunity never came again.

"So, what did you want to talk about?" Finn asked as they sat down in the front room.

She saw him clutching at the watch, bouncing his knee. He was nervous.

"I've just been thinking about a lot of things to do with us."

Shit, was his worst fear coming true?

"Us? Has my family said something to you?"

"No, and that's the problem."

"What?"

"Finn, we've been together for a while now. And I understand I've not properly met your family due to some circumstances, but it's not normal."

"My family aren't normal."

"And I understand that, but...I feel like you're trying to hint at something."

"If you're on about me not wanting you around anymore then you're completely wrong. I don't want to subject you to their nastiness. They literally don't give two shits about me anymore, so they won't care about you. I'm sorry (Y/N), that's just the way my fucked up family is."

"Maybe if we show them how serious we are, talk about our plans, they might listen. They'll see you as a grown up."

"And if they're not? If they don't care about us and are disrespectful to you?"

"I don't care. We have to at least try."

Finn ran a hand down his face, contemplating what she was saying. He knew what she meant, it wasn't fair that he was hiding her away. It wasn't fair that he had met her family and spent time with them and not even attempted to introduce her. He was just so scared of losing her, he could see his family ruining it all for him.

"I...I don't know (Y/N)."

She stood out of frustration, raising her voice."Why not? How would you feel if I hid you away from my family? I always have to lie when people ask have I met the famous Shelby family. My parents think I've met them too. I didn't want them to get angry with you. But now, it's starting to get to me, I just don't think it's fair."

"You know the situation I'm in. And you've also got to think, do you really want this? Do you want to be stuck with a disfunctional family that are a ruthless gang, with enemies everywhere they step?"

"Yes! Because I have you, Finn! If I didn't love you so much then I would have left a long time ago!"

Finn heard all too familiar voice outside, panic instantly setting it. Without a word, he grabbed (Y/N)'s hand, pulling her upstairs. She almost toppled over as she struggled to keep up with his long legs, stumbling through to Finn's bedroom. He closed the door, not slamming in as to not alert his family. He was breathing heavily, listening to his family walking into the house, muffled voices telling him there were multiple people inside.

"What the hell Finn? You're literally hiding me away from your family!"

"It's a lot to think about!" he harshly whispered.

"Finn, if you loved me then none of this would matter. I understand you're hesitant to tell your family-"

"Well clearly you don't understand, because you wouldn't keep nagging me about it."

"Nagging you? Nagging you?! I'm asking for a simple thing Finn. If we're going to have the future together that we planned, I'll have to meet them at some point."

"We'll just leave, we won't see them. It's not like they'll care."

"I can't make you do that Finn, as sweet as that is. I don't want to run from them. I want them to be part of our lives."

"You might change your mind after you meet them."

"So I will be meeting them?"

"That's all you took from that?"

"I'm actually getting angry Finn, I don't want us to argue."

"What have we been doing for the last ten minutes?"

"What if I told them myself? What if I go down there right now? And you can tell everyone how I'm just a girl you're sleeping with, you can make up a lie because that's what you would do. You wouldn't even admit it!"

"I would never say that about you!"

"I'm going home, Finn. I'll talk to you when you remember I'm your girlfriend who you're supposed to love."

Finn immediately blocked the door. (Y/N) huffed, frowning at him.

"You're not just my girlfriend now."

"What?"

Finn made a beeline for his bedside table, angrily opening the drawer and taking something out of it. (Y/N) couldn't see what it was as he had his back to her. She watched as he took a deep breath, shoulders relaxing slightly before he turned around.

"This was supposed to be different. I know I've been a shit boyfriend. I know you're upset about not meeting my family. I am not ashamed of you, I couldn't be prouder of you and I love to show you off. You're gorgeous, you're perfect, I'm incredibly lucky to be able to call you mine. Not only that, but you're so caring, you look after me, even after I come in after a stupid gun fight which I never tell you about, but that will change. I need to let you into my life more, you deserve to know what's happening. And I'm sorry for making you upset, you have every right to be mad at me. I want to change all that, and to prove my love for you," he lowered down onto one knee, producing a ring box from behind his back, opening it to reveal the engagement ring (Y/N) had desired,"I need to ask you something. (Y/N) (Y/L/N), will you marry me?"

(Y/N) had started crying as soon as he got down on one knee, overwhelmed with happiness. She was in hysterics as she screamed 'yes' over and over, jumping up and down. He laughed as he slipped the ring on her finger, scooping her up into his arms. They hugged tightly, kissing each other multiple times and passionately. After a few minutes, he set her back down, sharing one last kiss.

"They definitely heard us." (Y/N) giggled.

"They definitely heard you."

They were both correct when they heard movement downstairs, soon after footsteps coming upstairs. Finn sighed, he had to face them now.

"Finn," it was Tommy,"finish off with the girl, pay her dues and send her on her way."

Finn was instantly fuming at his brother's words. How dare he talk about (Y/N) in that way?! Without thinking, he threw open the door, Polly was also there.

"Don't talk about (Y/N) like that ever again! She is not a whore, she is not having sex with me for money. (Y/N) is my fiance, and I am going to marry her. No, she's not pregnant, I've proposed because I want to spend the rest of my life with her. So she's going to be a Shelby, and you're going to give her the respect she deserves. "

Polly glanced back at the young girl, looking her up and down. She had to admit, the girl wasn't backing down. She was looking strong, and not intimidated.

"Are you fucking serious?" Tommy mumbled.

"Yes. Meet (Y/N) (Y/L/N), soon to be (Y/N) Shelby, your sister-in-law."

"Whatever. Bring her downstairs."

Tommy turned around, Polly following after him, but not without another glance at the couple.

(Y/N) had appreciated Finn sticking up for her. It was so sweet, he had proven his love, though not exactly in the way they wanted; but they realised it didn't really matter how he proposed, they just wanted to be together and that was enough.

"Shit, am I really going down there to meet them?" (Y/N) suddenly grew nervous.

"You had some big balls earlier, backing out now?" Finn teased.

"Stop, this is serious."

"I'll be beside you the whole time. You're my girl, you always will be."

Finn kept a tight hold of her hand as they made their way downstairs. He could feel her hands getting clammy, quickly placing a kiss on the back of it. He knew she would be fine, she was strong, but her being nervous meant she cared.

As they entered the front room, they saw Thomas, Polly, Arthur and John. God, it was all of them. They sat on the only sofa available.

"Everyone is staring." (Y/N) subtly whispered.

"Let them. You're a fucking Shelby now, you're family and you're mine."

[xxblackballoonxx]

The Heart Underneath: 1914 Part 3

***This fic is being posted simultaneously on FanFiction.net and Ao3. I originally began it in 2016, and then life was life, and now I’m bringing it back because it deserves to be finished! I intended this story to be canon, but I cannot accept the events of the beginning of Season 4, so I’ll write it with the ending that I intended. Rating M as of Chapter 10 ***

Get a drink, get some tissues. Listen to "Never Let Me Go" by Florence + Machine and "I Have Loved You Wrong" by the The Swell Season, starting 3:30 for the final part. This broke me.

Chapter 12: 1914 Part 1 Chapter 13: 1914 Part 2

Chapter 15: J&M Letters 1 Full story here

The Heart Underneath

Chapter 14: 1914 Part 3 (18 and 19)

Martha and John stretched out their final day at the cottage as much possible, spending most of the morning wrapped up in bed together. John held Martha close to him, his arm around her waist, hand on her stomach.

“Do you think you’re pregnant yet?” John asked.

“I feel different. It’s hard to explain, but I feel different enough that I do think I am.” Martha replied, putting her hand on top of John’s and holding it to her skin closely.

John could feel his heart break a little bit at the thought of leaving her behind, carrying his child, with him not around. He took a shaky breath, placing his lips to her shoulder. Martha could sense his sadness.

“I’ll be alright, John. I know it’s not how we imagined it, but I’ll write and tell you about it, and we’ll pick out a name together. You just focus on staying safe and coming back to us.” Martha said as she linked their fingers together.

John nodded into her neck, trying to focus on the moment in front of him and nothing else.  

“I’ll talk to Polly when we get back, yeah? But I’m pretty positive about it.” 

Martha turned herself towards John, unshed tears in his eyes, threatening to spill over. She placed a hand on his cheek and he closed his eyes, tears dripping down as she wiped them away.

“Focus on me. Right here, this bed, this cottage. You’re not gone yet, love. Stay with me.” Martha whispered.

John nodded again, but couldn’t stop his shoulders from shaking as Martha wrapped her arms around him, holding him tightly. Martha understood his need to break down, the gravity of what was to come, all the more so with her being pregnant now. 

“You did a good job, Johnny, knocking me up before the wedding. It’s a sure thing.” Martha joked and John laughed in spite of himself.

He pulled back a little and allowed Martha to gently wipe away his tears again. She had always been so perceptive and so caring, he knew she would be a great mother.

“We waited until the time was right, which I know wasn’t easy sometimes, especially for you. This may not be the time we would’ve chosen, but it’s the time the world chose for us. I’m going to focus on the baby and supporting you, and you’re going to focus on taking care of yourself, yeah?” 

John nodded once more and let himself sink back into her arms, head on her chest. He took her left hand in his, and kissed where her wedding ring met her skin. He had to remember it all, if he was going to survive.

It was mid-afternoon when they finally started packing up their belongings. Martha carefully folded her birthday, and now, wedding dress between the sheets, and then into the quilt. She ran a hand over the side table, thinking about the nights they had spent there, and how she would never forget a single moment. 

“I don’t want to leave either.” John said as he walked up behind her and held her to him.

“I guess it’s time to go back to the noise. And the smoke. And the dirt.” Martha joked.

John placed his hands on her stomach and slowly rocked back and forth, burying his face in her hair. Martha noticed that he was holding her differently since their morning conversation, somehow even more intimately. Even more protectively. She had long sensed this part of him would exist, but it made her realize that even as deeply intertwined as they were, having John’s child would bring that to another level.

They allowed themselves a few more minutes of quiet bliss and then locked up the cottage.  John helped Martha up into the wagon, and she stared longingly at the green door as he went around to the other side. Someday.

************************************************************************

The couple arrived back at Watery Lane just before supper, and were greeted by hugs from the entire Shelby clan. Tommy and Arthur had spent the day preparing the supplies they would need, and the plan was for the three of them to enlist the following day. The family sat around the table for supper, and Polly immediately noticed the slight change between Martha and John. She bit back a smile and decided to talk to Martha in the morning.

“You all missed a right good party, John boy.” Arthur commented halfway through dinner, as he finished his tale about what the rest of Small Heath had been doing on the wedding night.

“I don’t know Arthur, I think my night was far, far better than yours.” John responded, making Martha choke as she tried not to laugh.

“I think you had more than a better night. Seems like it was all day and all night.” Ada said, earning a light smack from Polly.

“What?! Am I wrong?!” She protested.

John put his arm around Martha’s shoulders and kissed her cheek, which was all the answer they needed. Martha buried her bright red face in John’s shoulder as Tommy patted John on the shoulder, and Ada laughed.

“We all know what happens after a wedding, but we’ve got little ears in this room.” Polly said calmly, trying not to laugh herself.

“What happens after a wedding?” Finn piped up, watching with confusion.

“Um, well you know, you eat too much and have too many sweets and you feel sick, but you had fun.” John tried to explain, his own face flushed.

“I ate so many sweets after your wedding that I threw up.” Finn said proudly, which brought a fresh round of laughter to the table.

“Finny you did not!” Martha exclaimed.

“I did, too. Ask Aunt Polly!”

“It’s true. He had a belly ache all the next day from it. That’s what happens when you have too much fun, Finn.” Polly said, watching Finn pout in his chair.

A few hours after supper, Finn asked both John and Martha to tuck him into bed. It had been John’s longtime routine with his little brother, and clearly Finn had missed them both.

“Tommy and Arthur are going away soon. They said you are going, too. I don’t want you to.” Finn said sadly as he hugged John, who sat on the edge of the bed.

“I know, little brother. But this something we men have to do, it’s our duty to go. I don’t want to leave, but I have to. You’ll be here with Aunt Poll, and Ada, and Martha. They’ll look after ya. You have to be a brave boy, ok?” John replied, catching Martha wipe tears from her eyes.

Finn nodded and let John pull the blankets up around him. On impulse, John leaned forward to whisper in his ear.

“Can you take care of Martha for me? She’s going to be sad without me, too.”

Finn nodded again, and John turn the lamp down, taking Martha’s hand as they left the room and closed the door.

************************************************************************

The three eldest Shelbys met early the following morning with some others from the neighborhood, and stoically made their way to the recruiting offices. Martha kissed John goodbye at the front door and then walked into the kitchen, where Polly was waiting for her.

“How far along do you think you are?” Polly asked quietly, pouring Martha a cup of tea.

“A couple of weeks? The night John proposed … we decided to try. I can’t lose all of him, Polly.” Martha responded as her eyes watered.

“I know, it’s alright. You two are married now anyway, whatever happens, we will find a way through it. Stand here for a moment, let me see you.” Polly replied.

Polly moved her hands over Martha’s mid section, and then slowly up to her face. She smiled.

“It’s early, but you are. I’m happy for you, dear girl, even though the circumstances aren’t happy at all.” Polly hugged Martha tightly, letting her cry for a few minutes in her arms.

Ada walked in and caught Martha’s eye over Polly’s shoulder. Martha held out her arm, and the three huddled together, letting themselves feel the dread that was coming so quickly.  

“I’m pregnant, Ada.” Martha whispered.

Ada smiled through her tears and hugged her best friend.

“Congratulations. We’ll get through this together, yeah?” Ada whispered and Martha nodded.

The three sat down at the kitchen table and drink their tea in near silence. Polly’s thoughts were on her nephews, Ada’s on her brothers and her secret crush Freddie Thorne, and Martha could only think about John. 

It was late afternoon when the boys returned, faces grim. John beelined for the kitchen and smiled sadly at Martha, who was sitting at the table, sewing.  

“Come for a walk with me, darlin’?” John asked quietly and Martha took a deep breath before getting up.

John held her close as they walked through the streets, waving here and there to a few well wishers. His heart was pounding and he wanted nothing more than to run back to the cottage with the green door, and stay there forever with Martha.

“It’s done.” John finally said, feeling Martha tighten her grip around his waist.

“When?” She asked, voice shaky.

“Week from today, all of us.” He breathed out, afraid to speak the words.

Martha cried silently as they headed towards the abandoned house. John sat on the steps and pulled her onto his lap. She sobbed into his shoulder, and John’s own tears mixed with hers.  There were still some dried flowers on the stoop from their wedding the week before.

“I don’t know how to let you go.” Martha whispered once she caught her breath again.

“You’ll be with me every step. And I’ll be with both of you.” John whispered back, putting his hand against her middle.

“Talked to Polly this morning, I already know it’s true, but she confirmed it.” Martha said, trying to smile.

John nodded and used his handkerchief to dry her face. They sat for a long time on the stoop, eyes locked, one of their silent conversations. Heartbroken grey blue with heartbroken bright green. 

************************************************************************

The day before the Shelby brothers went to war, the Shelby women fretted for hours over their uniforms, supplies, and last minute needs. John walked Martha to the grocer, and Mrs. Averill’s heart broke as they entered the store. She slid three small packages over the counter before coming out from behind. 

“Some bits and bobs for you and your brothers, John. Sewing kit, paper, envelopes, other little things you might need. You write if you need anything else, you hear?” Mrs. Averill said, tears in her eyes.

“I will, thank you. For everything, really.” John replied as Mrs. Averill hugged him.

She touched Martha’s cheek and tried to smile.

“We women will stick together, don’t you worry.” 

It wasn’t until the door fully closed, a somber Martha and grim John stepping out into the street, that Mrs. Averill turned and sobbed. For all the boys of Small Heath, but mostly for John and Martha Shelby.

Supper was a quiet affair, even Finn recognizing the magnitude of what was coming. John kept his hand on Martha’s knee the entire meal, forcing himself to eat for strength, even though he really just felt like vomiting. Martha and Ada’s eyes met across the table, trying to find strength in each other.

Polly cleared the table as Tommy and Arthur stood up, pulling on their caps.

“John, we’re heading to The Garrison, did you want to come?” Arthur asked, knowing what the answer would be.

“No, thanks. I’m going to stay here with Martha.” John replied, holding Martha against his side.

Tommy and Arthur smiled in understanding. Tommy looking at Martha, and then the back door, slightly tilting his head. She nodded. Ada’s shoulders shook as she cried silently into her napkin. Finn clung to John’s leg, and Polly could barely look at them. 

“Finny, can John put you to bed so him and I can have some time together?” Martha asked, her throat seemingly choking on tears she pushed back down.

Finn nodded quietly and John picked him up, heading towards the stairs. Ada and Polly sat at the table, each lost in their own thoughts. Tommy and Arthur motioned for Martha to follow them outside to the back yard. They made sure the door was firmly closed before turning to face her.

“Martha, Tommy and I have made a pact. About John.” Arthur said.

“He’s told us, that you’re trying to start a family.” Tommy continued, trying to stay calm.

“I’m pregnant. Early, but John knows.” Martha responded quietly watching for their reaction.

“We’re going to do whatever we can to make sure John gets back to you, and to your child. He comes first.” Arthur stated in a firm tone.

“We can’t lose any of you.” Martha whispered, her eyes closing.

“I know, dear Martha. But John, he has his life set ahead of him, he deserves more than any of us to come back home. To be with you and have a family, and live until you are both old, a happy life. And we’re going to do our best to make sure he gets that.” Tommy explained, pulling Martha into a hug.

After a moment, Martha pulled herself together and stood tall. Arthur smiled and nodded to her.

“Be strong for him, love. And don’t tell him about this, he’ll never let it happen otherwise.” Arthur said.

Martha nodded and hugged each of them before going inside. Arthur and Tommy turned towards the alley, heading to The Garrison. They had a mission and they were going see that mission through.

After tucking Finn into bed, John quietly closed his door and found Martha waiting out in the hall. He led her up the stairs to their room.  

Inside, his uniform hung neatly on the back of the door, all of his gear already packed and downstairs. On the dresser were two new picture frames, one with a photo of them on their wedding day, and a second with a photo of John in his uniform. Martha picked up the wedding photograph, trying not to cry again.

“Mar, can I ask you a favor?” John said quietly behind her.

“What is it?” She replied and turned towards him.

“Can you wear your birthday dress tomorrow?” John asked, his fingers grazing against the dress, where it hung in their wardrobe.

“I can do that.” Martha said, trying to smile.

“I need you to be the last thing I see before I go.” John whispered as she walked to him.

Martha nodded and wrapped her arms around him, resting her head against his chest. He held her close to him, trying to file away every memory that had ever been shared in that room.

“Dance with me.”

John held out his hand and Martha took it, smiling shakily as he spun her slowly around and then back in towards him. He held onto her firmly, leading her across the floor to a silent song. They had never really needed music, they had their own rhythm.

John slowed to a stop in front of the window, the late sunset glinting off of Martha’s hair. He reached out to touch her face, watching her for what seemed like forever until he bent his head down to kiss her. They stood in a tight embrace, John’s arm holding her to him at her waist.  Martha kissed his cheeks and then back to his lips before unbuttoning the top of his shirt, and trailing her mouth across the base of his neck and his collarbone.

“I love you. I have loved you since I was four years old.” Martha whispered.

John smiled and pushed her gently back into the chair next to the table she used as a vanity. He knelt down and removed her shoes, and then stood up to unbraid her hair. Martha watched him in the mirror on the table, as his strong hands ran through the plaits, loosening her hair until it fell around her shoulders. 

“You are the most beautiful girl in the world.” John said.

He swept her hair to one side, placing his lips on her shoulder and then her neck, holding eye contact through the mirror. Martha reached up to unbutton her shirtwaist, and John helped her remove it, letting it fall to the ground. His eyes never left hers.

“Come here to me.” John commanded.

Martha stood and unhooked her skirt, letting it pool around her legs, before taking John’s hand and stepping towards their bed. He laid down and pulled her on top of him, kissing her with an intensity neither had ever felt. One by one, more items of clothing were pushed off the edge of the bed, until they were both completely undressed, except for Martha’s stockings. 

John propped himself up on his arms, Martha beneath him, her hand running down his stomach, and back, teasing him. She raised an eyebrow and he smirked at her, sitting back and picking up her left leg. 

“Who do you belong to?” John asked, slowly rolling her left stocking down, his hands running over her bare skin.

“You.” Martha replied, feeling her breath hitch in her chest.

John smiled, his eyes smoldering with desire, as he picked up her right leg, pulling the other stocking down just as slowly. He was going to miss these stockings. And the bare legs underneath. Remember this.

John took his time, kissing up each leg and then running his hands up to her ribcage, moving at an agonizing pace up Martha’s body. He could hear her whispering his name over and over, holding onto his shoulders, and then his face as they finally came eye to eye again.

He hovered over her, taking in the way she looked beneath him. Hair scattered across the pillow, her lips wet, her eyes watching him. Her arms wrapping around his back, hands running over his spine.

“I love you.” John said, gently but firm in the conviction of his words.

Martha smiled and he entered her as slowly as he could stand, feeling her body take him in. He grabbed one of her hands and laced their fingers together, before starting to move again at a lingering pace. John hooked his arm under her knee and pulled her right leg up, steadying himself on the mattress. Martha gasped as the move increased the friction between them, and he had never felt so fully inside of her.

John caught her eye again, his need for her burning through his gaze. They both silently recognized that this could be the last time together, but neither would dare speak the words.  Martha’s eyes streamed with tears, as the intensity of the moment, how fully John was within with her, brought to the surface all of her despair about him leaving. John kissed her and dropped his head down, letting her cry into his shoulder, as she held onto him tightly.

He could tell he was starting to hit her favorite spot and focused on that, making her feel the pleasure only he could give her. It felt like he went deeper and deeper every time, her body opening up to him, in a way he knew only he could do. Her soft cries were a clue that she was close, he knew every sound she made.

“I want to look at you.”

John pulled his head up and Martha laid hers back on the pillow, following his request. He moaned her name as he came inside her, and that was enough for her constrict around him. The sound of his voice, saying her name like that, sent her over the edge. The sensation was overwhelming, but he held her gaze as he felt himself slowly come down, both of them breathing heavily.

************************************************************************

Neither of them slept much, too worried and wired to go to sleep. John was fully awake when the sun rose, Martha just waking up, her back pressed against him. He rubbed her stomach gently, talking to the baby in his mind.

They laid together as long as possible, before finally getting up to dress for the impending doom that was coming. No one could’ve predicted just how long that would last.  

Martha watched John put on his new uniform, which of course he looked unbelievably handsome in. He took a small tin case from the dresser, tucked in his copy of their wedding photo, and placed it in his inside left breast pocket. He smiled sadly at her.

John sat on the bed and watched as Martha got ready, pulling on her undergarments and doing her hair, spraying a bit of her wedding perfume. That scent would never leave him.  

She pulled on the white dress over her head and then walked to him silently, so he could button it. They turned to face each other, holding hands.  

“I left two letters for you in the top left drawer. One to read later today, the other is if … it’s if something happens. Promise me you won’t read it otherwise.” John said solemnly.

Martha nodded and then grabbed her own letter off the table, handing it to him.

“For you, once you’re settled.” She whispered, barely able to speak the words.

John tucked the letter into the tin case and put it back in the same pocket. He checked his watch and sighed, the morning was going far too quickly. But first, he had something to do.

He got down on his knees and kissed Martha’s stomach before laying his face against it. Martha gently rubbed his ear.

“You take care of your mummy, yeah? I can’t wait to be back with you, little one. I love you and I love your mummy, remember that.” John said, Martha leaning her head back to hold in tears.

After a moment he stood and took her hand to lead her downstairs. They were going to have one last breakfast as a family.

************************************************************************

The Shelby clan stood together warily at the train station, surrounded by others just like them.

Shipping off fathers, sons, brothers, husbands, fiancés, boyfriends, nephews, cousins, friends. Every once and awhile, a wail would sound out over the crowd and it shook each person standing there.

John held Martha to him tightly, arms wrapped around her back, rocking side to side gently.

Tommy and Arthur stood stoically nearby, as Ada held Finn’s hand, and Polly prayed.

The train pulled in and Martha pressed her face into John’s chest, shaking her head. All around them, panicked whispers began as the departure was now imminent. John lifted Martha’s head up, tears already streaming down her face. The world slowed as he looked into her eyes, souls connecting for what could be the last time.

“I love you forever, Mar. I’ll be with you both, every hour of every day.” John said to her, his hand resting on her stomach once again.

“I love you always, Johnny. Come back to us.” Martha replied as her voice broke with a sob.

John took her face in his hands, closed his eyes, and kissed her. He took in the smell of her perfume, the softness of her hair, the feel of her skin. She dug her fingers into his neck, saying everything she needed to say through that kiss. 

Ada was fully sobbing, Finn crying, and Polly still praying as Tommy and Arthur watched John and Martha. They knew their pact was the right choice. It would stand.

The crowd parted as John took Martha’s hand and walked to the train, everyone knew who they were. Tommy and Arthur said their goodbyes and boarded, taking John’s bag. John turned once more to Martha.

“It’s time, love. You’ll be in my dreams.” He whispered in her ear, one last smell of her perfume, and she nodded, eyes glassy.

John kissed Martha one more time and boarded the train, finding that his brothers had commandeered a bench on the side facing the platform. He pulled down the window and watched Martha, her white dress with green ribbons moving in the wind, her hair flowing behind her, as the train started to pull away. They held each other’s gaze until they could no longer see each other, and the final car was out of the station. Grey blue and bright green. 

Remember this.

Only then did Martha turn and collapse into Ada’s arms, her wails of grief so heartbreaking the sound would haunt Ada the rest of her life. 

************************************************************************

Dear Martha,

I have loved you since the moment we met, when I was five and you were four. You are the best part of my life, the best part of me. I believe our souls are meant to be together forever, and I know I will come back to you.

Thank you for marrying me. Our days together at the cottage were some of the happiest of my life. The memories of us together will get me through. And I won’t forget about getting you that green door someday.

I’m with you and the baby. Every hour, every day, every night. Take care of each other.

I will love you forever, Mar. You are my only love.

Your husband,

Johnny

[justimagineitblog]

“You Used To Love Me” Michael Gray Fan Fiction - Chapter 7

A/N: Here is Chapter 7! Thank you so much for your prompts! If yours wasn’t used in here, sit tight because it will probably come into play in the next chapters x I hope you guys enjoy the little flashback toooo...... 

This one is extra long to make up for my absence, I’ve had some family troubles going on which is always 10x worse because we’re confined in quarantine together and I know many many people are struggling with being around and stuck with toxic family members too...

I hope this gives you some escape during this time, it certainly did for me xx 

I’ve been sitting here mulling over this paper work for so long the words are starting to blend together. But I refuse to stop working. It’s my only distraction from thinking about what happened at the meeting yesterday. God knows what kind of consequences Michael received for putting Gina in her place.

My heart lurches as the door to the office opens, but it settles again once I see that it’s only Polly coming in, cursing as she wrestles with her coat.

“Fuck it’s cold out there” he hisses as she looks over and realises I’m here way earlier than I need to be “You’re here early”

“Couldn’t sleep” I sigh “Figured I’d give myself some extra time to get back into the swing of things, in case I’ve forgotten”

“You haven’t forgotten, you’re too good at it” she winks, reassuring me.

I want to talk. I want to talk about anything and everything with her. But all I can seem to want to bring up is Michael and what happened yesterday.

Reading the look on my face, she gives me a sad smile.

“I called him last night. Apparently Gina seemed to be surprisingly reasonable when he got home” She pauses, before continuing with a smirk “Maybe some things you said put her into place”

Trying not to make it incredibly obvious, I exhale slightly in relief. I didn’t even realise I had been holding my breath.

“Is he coming in today?”

“Yes, he is, work as usual”

God. I can’t tell if that makes me happy or makes me want to crawl into a hole. It still feels weird to me, the prospect of being around him but as virtual strangers. Not as lovers. And then there’s the fact that Gina has suddenly had a change of heart and is letting Michael work with me. Is that all just manipulation? Is this just part of her game?

“And Gina is letting him?” I blurt out “Are you sure she didn’t fall and hit her head on the way home?”

Polly scoffs, “I think she already hit her head a long time ago… But, I also think she realised you were right about this benefiting her. That’s if she’s as smart as she is bitchy”

Polly chuckles and I can’t contain my own laugh as she sits down across from me at our work desks.

No matter what Gina is doing, whatever game she is playing by acting okay with all of this, I still flashback to the day Michael asked me to stay away from him and Gina.

“Whatever she is thinking, I still think it’s only best if I try and keep out of their way as much as possible-“

Polly sighs. I know she’s frustrated. I know she wants Michael to be served giant reality check and shake him out of whatever trance he’s in. And I want to do that to. I want to hold him, I want to bring him back. But my mind is constantly in battle about whether he can be brought back or not.

You see, I was sure that he loved me. And then I had that ripped away from me. Since then, nothing feels certain to me. Everything feels like its an unknown. Like I’m just waiting for the rug to be pulled out from under my feet without warning. So how could I ever be sure of anything Michael does from now on?

“You know it’s about time you start putting yourself first” Polly raises her brows at me.

I hum in reply as I stand up from my desk to make a much needed cup of coffee. Putting myself first isn’t my strong suit, and I really do not wanting to get into that conversation at this hour in the morning.

This time when the office doors swing open again they bring with them not only a cold breeze, but Tommy, Arthur and Michael.

I’m greeted with them shivering and grumbling ‘good-morning’ as they try and shake the cold. I’m dying to look at Michael, to read his face, to see what stories his eyes have to tell today. But I don’t. I keep my head down, continuing to make my coffee.

“One of those for me?” Tommy asks playfully, smiling as he comes up next to me. When I look over at him, he gives me a little nudge and a reassuring smile. He knows how hard this is for me to be here, around Michael. This is his way of letting me know he’s got my back today.

“I’m making coffee, does everyone want one?” I call out to the chattering Shelby family behind me, who are all taking seats around the table for our morning meeting.

“Only if it’s an Irish one” Arthur replies with a laugh, earning a disapproving slap on the arm from Polly.

I smile to myself as I make our coffees. I still remember the way they all like it. Without even having to think about it. How many sugars they take. Who likes a lot of milk and who doesn’t. And I missed this. Making coffee for the Shelby’s on a cold winters morning, getting us ready for the day ahead. Like our little ritual.

As I carry the hot drinks over to them, handing them into their cold hands, this is the first time I take a look at Michael. We make some fleeting eye contact as I hand him his drink last, before sitting down at the only seat left. The one directly across from him. Goddamn it. I swear that Tommy, Polly and Arthur would have planned this.

Tommy launches into todays plans straight away. But it doesn’t take long for his talking to fall into the background as my attention goes to Michael. Moments ago he was listening to Tommy intently, but now, he’s staring at the mug in front of him like he’s seen a ghost.

Making Michael coffee used to be our thing. He used to hate coffee. But for some reason, he liked the way I made it for him. Lots of sugar. Not a lot of milk. Not to hot, but enough to warm you up on a cold day. My heart starts to race. His face is twisted into a half smile, half frown. Like this moment is painfully bittersweet. God knows its such a trivial thing. But it was our thing. Every morning we would kiss in the kitchen, and I’d hand him a warm mug as we woke up together. This would have been the first time in over 6 months that we have shared that moment again. And of course, these are the circumstances its under.

He fiddles with the mug, running his hands over it before shaking his head. I wonder what he is thinking, what he might be remembering, as he stares into the coffee like his mind is elsewhere…

FLASHBACK

Michaels bare feet pattering down the hallway behind me is followed by a steady pair of hands that wrap themselves around my waist.

He pulls me back against his chest and I let myself sink into him, my head falling back to rest against his shoulder.

“Good morning” he mumbles, pressing soft kisses along my neck and jawline. His strong arms tighten around my waist, enveloping me in warmth.

“Hi” I coo in return, turning in his arms to face him.

I smile immediately at the sight of him. I always do. His eyes are tired, puffy, his hair pushed all out of place.

He closes his eyes in content as I run a hand through his hair. Biting down on his bottom lip, he pulls at my waist to get me closer to him. Our bodies are pressed up against one another, my arms draped over his shoulders and around his neck. There’s no way I could get closer to him than this, but still, he always tries. And I don’t mind. At all. I think we would be constantly joined at the hip if we could.

“Have I told you how much I love you?” He whispers jokingly. I couldn’t even count up all the ways Michael tells me and shows me his love. It’s every day. It’s in both grand gestures and in little moments. Like flowers for no reason.  Kissing me in front of his friends and family. Always holding my hand when we’re out, and giving it a little squeeze when he knows I’m anxious. The way he looks at me from across the room, and already knows what I’m thinking.

“No, I don’t think you have mentioned it before…” I furrow my brows, pretending to think.

“You’re right” he nods “There aren’t enough words in the English dictionary for that”

My heart flutters, skipping all kinds of beats. We’ve been together for four years now. But no one. No. One. Has the effect on me that Michael does to this day.

“ ‘I love you’ will just have to do then” I chuckle

“Well in that case, I fucking love you”

Every time he says it, it’s like the first time. With an intense passion. It never gets old. He never uses it flippantly. It never loses it’s meaning. He still looks at me with those eyes, with awe and love. And god knows I still look at him like that. From the moment I met Michael I looked at him like he hung the stars and the sun in the sky himself. I adore this man. Being those close to him, I can see all the little freckles scattered across his nose. I could spend the rest of my life counting the.  His eyelashes are fluttering and behind them are his eyes. The colour of the Tenerife sea. I can see the little creases and lines, from laughing and smiling. I hope I put some of them there.

He watches me back, admiring me just as intently as I am admiring him.

“You’re so beautiful” he breathes, barely even in a whisper. Like it was a thought that slipped out, that he didn’t even mean to say out loud.

He presses his lips to mine, kissing me sweetly. It’s tender, but without enough passion to make me want to take him straight back into that bedroom down the hall.

When he pulls away, his eyes stay closed for a moment, his forehead resting on mine. Savouring the moment. I wish I could live in this moment right here with him forever. In fact, I’m not quite sure what I would do with myself without these moments. Without Michael.

“Coffee?” I ask, as the kettle finally boils in the background.

“Mmm,” he hums nodding “Please”

He lets me go from his grip, and hops up on the kitchen counter. He sits on the edge, watching me endearingly as I make his coffee just the way he likes it.

“3 sugars, warm but not to hot, just a dash of milk for one Michael Gray” I smile proudly as I stand between his legs, handing him his drink.

These are my favourite days. If I could freeze frame this I would. But I know I don’t have to. Michael is my forever. And I want to spend the rest of my forever waking up like this.  

He chuckles, smiling down at me gratefully as we drink our coffee together.

FLASHBACK ENDS

Suddenly Tommy’s voice gets louder as I come back to reality, realising I’ve just been lost in a memory. I look around the table nervously, relieved to find that no one noticed. Oh god how long was I distracted for.

“And finally, Isabelle… You’re willingly accepting and returning to the role of Head of Acquisitions?” Tommy asks me, a smile on his face. He already knows the answer. Tommy and I were quite the pair back before I left the company. Little partners in crime. He always trusted me, from the get go. And I’ve missed my job. Michael aside, I think I would always found myself working for the Shelby’s.

“Yes sir” I nod back, and Arthur cheers excitedly, clapping his hands.

“You still remember what to do?” Tommy teases

“I might have to fix up the damage you did while I was gone but I’m sure I can handle it” I tease back, earning a laugh from Polly. She always loved having another female working around the company to even things out.

In the corner of my eye I can see a fleeting smile on Michael’s face, before he clenches his jaw and it disappears. Like he’s trying not to reminisce on how much this feels like old times.

“Right, that’s all then?” Polly asks Tommy, and he nods.

“That’s it, everyone clear?”

I’ve got my work already cut out for me today. Now that I’m back in the Shelby company as Head of Acquisitions, I’ve got a lot of liaising the catch up on. A lot of companies that invest in us, that we protect in return who I need to check in on and make sure all ends of our deals are being held up. This is my forte.

And luckily, it’s going to keep me busy and distant from Michael. What I said to Polly earlier still stands. I still need to keep my distance from him. I have to. I can’t expect that he is ever going to snap out of whatever he is caught up in and come back to me. Cause god knows I cannot tell what this man is thinking or where his head is at anymore. I will only break my own heart even more if I wait for something that might never happen.

We all leave the meeting table and I gather my paper work from my desk before heading out for the day. And it’s a long day. But luckily for me, our clients and business partners were mostly excited to see me back in the business. And because of this, they were willing to comply with almost anything. See Arthur had temporarily taken over my role while I was out of the company, and he has a much more… unconventional way of liaising with clients.

It’s dark, almost 6pm by the time I begin to head back to the Shelby limited office, to finish up my paper work from this morning before going home. Adamant that no one is going to be in the office, I let myself in and finally relax from today. I even do something I used to do all the time when I was alone in here, which is flick the radio on and hum along.

Completely content with myself, I float around the desks organising my files and folders, signing of on legal forms and feeling some kind of familiarity and normality in my life again. Maybe I don’t have Michael. Maybe when I leave here tonight, I’m going home alone instead of home to him. But at least I have this. This job. Something to cling on to, something familiar from before my life was turned upside down.

As I flitter past the radio I turn it up louder, swaying to myself. But I’m snapped out of my temporary bliss when I hear a door open and shoes walking across the floorboards.

I spin around, completely startled to find Michael standing, staring back at me just as shocked.

“Fuck” I hiss, placing a hand over my chest as I try to steady my heart rate “I didn’t realise you were here” I stutter over my words.

He shakes his head quickly, his eyes darting to the ground then back up at me nervously.

“No I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to frighten you” he quickly replies “I didn’t even hear you come in until I heard the music”

My attention quickly turns to the radio, which is playing obnoxiously in the background. I reach to turn it off, but he stops me before I can.

“Wait, it’s fine, I like it on” he rubs his neck, as the tension and awkwardness just grows stronger.

I nod in reply “I was just finishing up some paper work, I’ll just finish it up a home” I side step away from him, heading over to my desk.

“No, no don’t, I’m going back to my office I was just checking to see who was here ” He insists, and I watch him wearily.

Weeks ago he was staring at me stone cold, heartless, asking me to stay away. Now he’s apologising for accidentally frightening me and insisting that I can finish my work here.

We stand there like fools, both not knowing what to say to each other.

Say something Michael. My mind is begging. Just say what you’re thinking.

But of course, he doesn’t speak. He just stares at me, like he’s not sure where to look or when to speak. Or maybe he’s scared of what might come out of his mouth if he lets himself speak. What he might confess. Reveal.

I begin to play with my hands nervously. How long is he going to fucking stand here for?

My question is answered when he buries his hands in his pockets and gives me a nod, before turning and heading back to his office.

I’m still glued to my spot until he closes the door behind him and he is out of my sight.

So much for a relaxing night alone, finishing off paper work.

I’m only in the office for another 30 minutes maximum, as I rush around trying to get this work over and done with. I went from wanting to hang out here all night, alone and working with the radio going to desperately hurrying to get out of here like my life depends on it.

I’ve probably filed the remainder of the papers wrong, and will have to deal with that tomorrow. But that seems like a pretty good option compared to being stuck alone in here with Michael.

Finally signing of the last document, I lock up all the windows and check the doors are locked too. I wrestle my coat on and clutch at my keys nervously, making my way to Michael’s office.

Just tell him you’re leaving and then go.

“Uh, I’m gonna head home. I locked up all the ” I begin, as I step into the door way of his office, clutching at my keys and bag nervously. As my eyes fall over him, I find him sitting at his desk, his head hanging in his hands.

When he hears my voice his head shooting in my direction, as I startle him. He quickly tries to compose himself, clearing his throat and running a hand through his hair.

“Uh yeah okay thanks” He breathes, his face distorted in embarrassment.

He looks exhausted. His eyes blood shot and tired. Like some weight has been on his shoulders and its getting harder and harder to carry.

I realise I’m just standing there staring at him. That’s something that Michael and I seem to be finding ourselves doing a lot recently, because we can’t find the words to say to one another (or maybe we know exactly what we want to say and can’t bring ourselves to say it ). I quickly turn on my heels, wanting nothing more than to run out of there.

I’m almost at the door when I hear him suddenly call out my name.

“Izzy!” He calls, and I halt in my tracks immediately at the sound of my name. At the sound of him saying my name.

“Just wait a second, will you come here?” he asks out breath from the other side of the room.

I pause at the door for a moment, gathering my composure before I turns around and face him. I take a few steps closer to him and he does the same.

I don’t speak, I just wait, holding my breath in anticipation for the words that follow.

“You don’t need to avoid me like this” he breathes, his chest rising and falling heavily, and I can tell his heart is pounding.

I don’t need to avoid him like this. Are you kidding me?

He returns from America after not hearing from him in 6 months, with a wife. He demands me to keep my distance. To quit the job at the pub. To leave the company. For his sake and for his wives sake. And now he wants to stand there and tell me I don’t have to avoid him?

With all the rage and disbelief bubbling in me, I expect myself to launch into a screaming match, yelling at him about how dare he tell me I don’t have to avoid him.

But suddenly, all I can do laughs in complete and utter disbelief. My arms raise and fall back down by her sides in exasperation.

“What do you want Michael?” I beg, shaking my head at him “You told me to stay away… so thats what I’m doing. You came back from America with a new fucking wife. Am I supposed to act like everything is fine? You wanted this Michael! You told me to keep my distance. This what you wanted!”

Now my chest is rising just as heavily as his. I shake my head at him. I cannot believe this man who I used to know inside and out, is now the single most confusing thing to me on this earth.

He looks down, turning his back to me as he puts his coat on and picks up his hat.

I glare at him in anger, thinking that he’s just about to say nothing yet again. But when he turns back to face me, my stomach drops. As our eyes meet, I discover that there are tears welling up in them.

And then, a tear spills over, rolling down his cheek.

“You’re right. I wanted this” He breathes, sounding completely unconvinced, his voice quiet and shaky.

And just like that, he turns and leaves the room, exiting the building through the back alley door. As I stand in the lurch, left in the wake of the tsunami of emotions between Michael and I, one word rattles around in my head.

‘Wanted’

TAGLIST

@shadow-of-wonder

@marvelismylifffe​

@saintd0lce

@haphazardhufflepuff​

@peaky-things​

@burnitup​

@swweett-insanityyy​

@ganjeolhiddaeng​

@thoughtfulfreakalpaca​

@infinitelycharmed23​

@chloeforde​

@ashtronomyyyy​

@livingforbarnes​

@cleverdreamerhoagiewolf​

@elleclairez​

@marvelschriss​

@carezzesuigraffi

@l0tsofpennies

@siliethkaijuy

@ineedabifriend

@bloodorangemoonlight

@maiabiovillage

@yoheyyosup

[numberonefann]

Sneak peek from Chapter X of "red"

“I know it wasn’t you.” Zara said, looking at Tommy carefully. “Did you see who left the room the second Arthur said it was safe for Freddie?”

Tommy’s eyes widened in realization. “She didn’t. She couldn’t have.” He sunk down into a booth.

“I told you there was something off about her.” Zara sat down next to him, still distanced.

He looked at her sadly. “I’m so sorry, love. I didn’t think offering Lizzie money would hurt you, I just wanted to protect John.” Tommy put his head in his hands.

Zara carefully scooted closer to him, placing one of her hands on his back comfortingly. “I know, Tommy. I’m not mad anymore, but can you blame me for feeling hurt? I mean, what are we doing here?” She gave a fake laugh.

Tommy lifted his head and looked at Zara, a strange look in his eyes. Zara felt him staring and looked at him weirdly. “Why are you looking at me like that?” she asked.

Tommy leaned closer and gently cupped her jaw, leaning her head up towards him. Zara’s breath got caught in her throat, as Tommy’s eyes flickered from her eyes to her lips. She slowly leaned closer until she felt Tommy’s breath fanning over her lips. Tommy closed his eyes and finally closed the gap between them, connecting his lips to hers. Zara melted into the kiss, wrapping her arms around Tommy’s neck as one hand settled in his hair, the other clutching at his collar. Tommy felt his heartbeat run wild, as he finally kissed the girl he’d been in love with for years. Their lips moved in sync, as Tommy pulled her impossibly close, eager to feel as much of her against him as he possibly could. Zara finally broke the kiss when she needed to pull away for air, the both of them breathing heavily, staring at each other still wrapped in each other’s arms.

[dancethroughthethunder]

Requests Open

gonna do something new over here and open requests!

Below is a list of fandoms I’ll write for, as well as characters I’m most familiar with (though you can certainly request others in the fandoms)

-Harry Potter (Lightening and Marauders Era)- Most familiar with: Draco Malfoy, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, Harry Potter, Cedric Diggory, Hermione Granger, Ron Weasley, Neville Longbottom

-MCU- Most familiar with: Peter Parker, Bucky Barnes, Natasha Romanoff, Steve Rogers

-Peaky Blinders

-Stranger Things

-Merlin

-Newsies the Musical- Most familiar with Jack and Davey

-The Bodyguard 

What I will write:

I typically write and have written x readers, but I will write character x character if you ask! Smut, fluff, angst are all okay but no smut with minors. I typically default to a fem!reader bc of my own gender but feel free to specify any gender or sexuality. If there’s another fandom you’ve seen me reblog that isn’t on this list, just ask me and I’ll probably write for it.

Honestly I’ll give most things a try, really! if you’re not sure, shoot me an ask (anon or otherwise) and I’ll tell you- I promise I’m super nice

What I won’t write: 

incest, non-con (though I will write a character who is a survivor of SA if requested), descriptions of self-harm, pedophilia, anything sexual involving minors. 

I also am a human being who reserves the right to decide that a request makes me uncomfortable and not write it, even if it doesn’t explicitly fall under these parameters. And before anyone comes at me for it, I know minors can be in sexual situations, I myself was when I was a minor however, I am an adult and find it highly inappropriate and frankly super gross for me to be writing that.

Any other questions or requests just let me know! As specific or vague as you want!

[novashelby]

The Balls in Our Courts-Chapter Twenty-Two

Pairing: TommyxOCxFinn

Warning: Nudity in front of minor without sexual intent

Chapter Summary: Tommy hates Paris. Amelia learns something awful about Tommy

Links:

Ao3

Wattpad

[ashelbygirl]

Sex with Thomas Shelby would include...

-Teasing. Always. You teasing him and you driving him crazy.

-After work sex.

-Thomas leaving you a note on your bed saying “I want you naked when I get home.”

-Quickies whenever and wherever you could.

-Always craving for each other.

-Blow jobs. Him loving your bj.

-Sex in public places. Bathrooms, cars, pubs, etc.

-Hair pulling.

-Him reminding you that you’re his.

-Him being dominant as fuck.

-Him fucking you against a wall.

-“Just because I let you be on top does not mean you get to dominate me. But it’s adorable that you tried…”*

-Him moaning your name.

-Once in a while you being dominant and taking control.

-“I want you to fuck me Thomas. Right here. Right now. And I want you to fuck me hard.”

-Roughness. All the way.

-Under the table touching.

-Dirty Talking.

-Daddy kink.

-“I won’t say it twice YN. Strip down and get on your knees right now.”

-“What do you want daddy to do, princess? I didn’t hear you.”*

-Whispering sweet nothings.

-Angry/Make up sex.

-Fast or slow sex but hard. Always hard.

-You scratching his back.

-Love bites.

-Thomas spanking you.

-“You have been a bad girl YN, is time for me to remind you who’s in charge.”

-Thomas loving having you on top. Him being obsessed with the way you ride him.

-Multiple orgasms.

So, the ones that has a * are from this two accounts that I LOVE, so please go check them out.

Ps. If they ask me to it, I would be deleting that part.

* @gingers-writing

* @icarus-fell-in-spring

[missmarrypotter]

Tommy ain’t always right, You know!?

Finn Shelby x OC (Olive)❤️

I'm just so in love with this boy, Finn is an angel!!

WARNING: making out!? but more fluff i think

English it not my first language so please excuse my mistakes.🤗

She grabbed her Jacked and rushed out of the office. The look she shot Thomas Shelby before stepping outside was full of disappointment and blankness. She didn’t wait for any respond.  “You need to be a man … bullshit he does ..” she mumbled to herself, running through the hidden, dark and smoke filled alleys of Birmingham. It was much colder than she thought, the fresh air of the night burning in her lungs from running.

“Finn!!!”, She almost shouted at her Childhood Friend who was about to disappear behind yet another corner.

“Finn fuckin Shelby!! Wait.”

He stopped right there, turning around. He Looked tired. But when he recognized her he put on a smile, waiting for her to reach him.

“Olive, what’s with ya!?”, he was quiet amused seeing her breathless like that. “Why did ya run!?”

“Cause those legs ya got there are like twice as long as mine ..” she explained gasping, pulling him into a hug.

He hugged her back, stroking her dark brown hair carefully.

“Did anythin happen? Ya alright?!” He asked, tensed and sounding slightly worried. He relaxed when she shook her head, sighting in relief. She interrupted the hug and took a step back.

“ I was in the room as well when ...ya know.. that talk with Tommy and stuff   ” she told him, looking right into his blueish green eyes, waiting for his reaction.

He looked down at his feet, his jaw clenched. He looked kind of ashamed and guilty at the same time.

Silence. Just for Seconds but it felt like hours. Finn fumbled around with his hands while Olive nibbled on her chin long hair.

“I liked what ya said back there” She cleared the silence, scratching the back of her head.

He looked at her with lots of confusion in his eyes.

“ Wha .. are ya shitting me!?” He asked, not really believing what he just heard.

He thought Olive would react completely different. He thought she would scold him for losing his virginity to some whore Lizzie, Aunt Polly and Linda rented for him. She grew up in a brothel herself since she was 6 years old. Madam Adley found her that age and adopted her into her family. Schooled her. Fed her. Sarah Adley had no children on her own so her Ladies were her family. Her daughters. She treated them all very well. Her business was for the high society only. For rich Men and Women to forget and enjoy themselves. Olive herself had worked there for a year when she turned 16.

To secure her loved ones safety Madam collaborated with the Peaky Blinders. They kept violent lovers away and made sure everybody paid and in return the girls gave some informations about their clients or their Bodys to the Blinders.

Through that Finn and Olive met at the very young age of 7. They soon bonded and the Shelbys became the girls second family. She proved herself trustworthy very quick and her big green eyes, her open, loving nature as a child and later her charming smile and her feminine curves were often very helpful to interact with new allies or enemies. She had a very sharp mouth if she had to and never lost her words. But she could also be as quiet and nondescript as a mouse so no one would notice her like today in the office. They even allowed her to stay through family meetings since no private conversation she witnessed had ever met a third ones ear. They loved her and she loved them. Apparently some more and in a different way than others. Tommy decided to employ her as a gift for her 17th birthday. She was good with customers and numbers and that way they were able to look after her. Win Win Situation for everyone. Finn secretly was very happy about that. So his Olive didn't had to do these humiliating things anymore. He never thought he would ever in his life have sex against payment himself because the thought of someone buying his girls body made him sick so many times. Buying a person like some object just sounded so wrong to him even if it seemed to be normal for his brothers. He always imagined his first time a completely different way. With someone he loved. Someone who wanted him. To be honest he always thought it would be with her. But he was too shy to make a move. He always thought he wasn’t good enough for her. Not manly enough. Not experienced enough.

If only he knew she wished the same thing.

But since she had to help her Mother out back then to safe her Business, she felt dirty. She was happy to help, she always was. On the other hand she didn't feel good enough for the boy she took a liking in anymore. So she never made a move as well. But now she had to say something. She had to tell him how much of a man he was to her. Has always been.

Out of the sudden she smiled. She just happily smiled at him, giving him chills.

“I don't want it like that ever again, tom.

Not when they don't even want to do it , expect for the money.” She repeated his words from earlier, taking his hands.

“It made me so fucking happy when you said that.” She whispered squeezing his hands, taking a step forward.

A perplexed Finn gently placed his chin on the top of her head.

“ But Tommy was right when he said that everyone gets tired. That everything these days is for money. That i need to be a man” he muttered into her hair, placing a little kiss there without even realizing it.

“But you are a man, Finn”

She loved the shelby boys a lot. But She honestly never would have wanted to trade with any of their woman. She wanted someone she could rely on. Someone she didn't have to fear about not coming home because he picked unnecessary fights that started people and himself getting killed . Someone who didn't yell all the time. Someone who wouldn't keep secrets from her. Someone who would never look at another woman the way he looked at her. Someone who would never cheat. Someone like Finn.

She got up on her tiptoes, nuzzling her face into the crook of his neck, hugging him as tight as she could. He placed his hands on her back, pressing her body against his.

“Tommy was right that there is an empty space to be filled now that John is dead. And yes everybody gets tired someday.But that does not mean you have to become like them. There is nothing wrong with not fighting everything, anytime, at any cost. There is nothing wrong with wanting love instead of a quick fuck. Because so do i .. ”

Her last words were almost too quiet to hear them, but he did. She gently kissed his cheek  before she let him out of her squeeze, taking his hands once again. He Was speechless. Did he hear it right!? Did she mean that she wanted him or just true love in general!?

His breathing was too slow to see any movement on his chest but his heart did the exact opposite. It was about to explode.

“And even though it might sound crazy …. Tommy ain’t always right, You know!?. Not everything is for money. True love ain’t . He should know that better than anyone.. god that sounds like such a cliche” she laughed, letting go of his hands. But as soon as she did so his right hand was right back around her wrist, pulling her closer while he placed his other one on her cheek, caressing it gently with his thumb.

“Good. Cause i don't have any fuckin money .. but i luv ya so much”, he whispered into her ear. His voice was raspy and slightly shaking from nervousness and the freezing aerial. Both of their hearts stopped right there, both holding their breaths.

He laid his forehead against hers, brushing her nose with his, their lips almost touching.

As he managed to respire again his hot breath brushed over her ice cold lips. Now there were Goosebumps all over her body. She wanted to say something. She wanted to say those words back but her vocal cords wouldn’t allow it. Instead her hands just grabbed his soft cheeks, closing the small gap between their lips. Out of the sudden her whole body seemed to warm up. By the touch of his soft lips. By his hand clawing into the hair of the back of her head in response while his other hand found its way to her hip, holding into her tight. Their Lips seemed to perfectly match up. Their movements slow but impassioned. Finn Tasted like whisky and cigarettes while Olive tasted more like plums and black tea. It was a perfect combination. Soon things heated up. Finn had her pinned against the wall of some house, his hands on her bum to hold her up. Her thighs were wrapped around his waist, the right hand gently tugging his hair while her left one softly scratched his neck. The desire they both kept a secret for a quiet long time finally turned into something real.

Finns tongue slid over her bottom lip, before allowing them a break to take a breath. Both were heavily panting when they heard a suggestive whistle.

It was Isaiah. Standing there with his hands in his pockets, grinning from one ear to the other.

“Well if the two of ya are done swallowing each other we could head to the Garrisons like we planned, aye!?” he teasingly said.

“Ough i totally forgot…” finn said, setting Olive down. Both of them fixed their hair and cloth as much as possible before walking over to their friend. Isaiah laid his arms around his mates still grinning widely.

“Finally guys, finally!” He laughed.

Finn and Olive shot each other a approving look.

“Well we know ya going to tell everyone about this Issy, so please make sure to tell Pol, Linda and Liz as well so they don't feel the need to rent my boyfriend a whore ever again, yep!?”

“I totally will sweetheart, everything for my love birds” he assured.

At the Garrisons everyone congratulated them like they've just announced their wedding or something. They were really sweet and supportive. Tommy, Arthur and Polly each gave them a speech about the birds and the bees and how they would support them if Finn would get her pregnant anytime soon but that they'd prefer if there was no need to. It was really weird but fun at the same time. When the Garrisons cleared up Tommy offered to drive the two young ones home. They gratefully refused. A walk home, just the two of them would be perfect now. They said goodbye to everyone, leaving hand in hand. Finn walked her home to Madam Adley's house, never letting go of her hand. As they arrived he walked her to the door. He leaned against the frame of the big wooden door, letting go of her hand. She turned to face him. She had the happiest expression he had ever seen on her.

“I love you too , Finn.”

He softly smiled, pecking her nose.

“I know. But you saying it …. Feels damn awesome, Luv” he chuckled. She jokingly rolled her eyes at him, fumbling around with his jacked.

“I'd love to have company while sleeping tonight, Finn” she mumbled, slightly smirking.

He slightly blushed, brushing some hair behind her right ear.

“ Sure can do, Babygirl” he just smirked and kissed his girl lovingly. Then he picking her up, carrying her inside.

Things went a little different than actually planned. Madam and some of the girls were still awake and insisted that instead of doing god knows what they should join them for some drinks. They did. So everything that happened tonight was one of Olives sisters vomiting, Sarah Adley offering Finn to come by anytime as long as he treated her daughter well and 6 bottles of wine being destroyed. After that both of them just fell into bed, immediately falling asleep in each others arms. In the morning both of them just stayed in there, trying to sleep their massive hangover away. Honestly it was kind of a good start in their relationship. Things would happen sooner or later so why rush in. The important thing was that their relationship was  clarified and official now and everyone supported them. The future would settle the rest.

[padfootdaredmetoo]

Update - July 25th

Finn Shelby X Reader!

Coming soon to a blog near you!

Thank you to everyone that sent in a request! ♥️

- Are you hurt? A panic blurb

Tommy & the Jealous wife reader - hot sexy angst with hurt comfort honestly I'm blushing just thinking about it - Posted May 10th 2022

Tommy & the Dom Assassin Reader - violent and sexy a wild tale of revenge! - Posted May 28th 2022 -

Follow up blurb - Reader settles into her new life. - Posted May 30th 2022

Tommy & The Witch - the reader is a witch who can tell the future but she definitely did not see him coming. - Posted June 25th

Tommy & the childhood Bff - Even though he married Grace true love never dies - even when you almost do - Posted June 30th

Geralt of Riva finds out your pregnant with his baby ( omg omg omg witcher request omg) - Posted July 1st

- Finn & The reader from the orphanage - who happens to have a mean boyfriend. Good thing the Shelby's have a strict *no mean boyfriends allowed* rule at the garrison.

- Tommy & the girl he adopts from the orphanage - who knew verbally assaulting a nun would win you the perfect family

- Deadpool & Reader - a blurb about Wade watching his babe do what she does best - kick ass all fancy like

- The omg I hit over 1,000 people celebration! - Or something? Idk what to do but I see all of you and I love you so so much and need to prove my undying love for everyone.

Thank you to everyone that reads, reblogs, comments, likes, or just lurks. ♥️ I hope my Tommy makes you blush in public or gives you comfort in the wee hours of the morning.

[ijustwant2write]

Bloody Kids-Finn Shelby x Reader

(GIF credit to @sophieshelby)

MASTERLIST

Summary: John and Esme's kids are wreaking havoc as usual, and (Y/N) steps in to help. However, it's her and Finn that end up being naughty.

Characters: Finn Shelby x Reader, Polly Gray x Reader (platonic), Esme Shelby x Reader (platonic), John Shelby x Reader (platonic), Thomas Shelby x Reader (platonic)

Meanings: (Y/N)=Your name

Warnings: Shouting, swearing, slight smut, fluff

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I cringed as one of John's kids screamed, her high pitched voice ringing in her ears. They were running around like wild animals, bickering over anything and everything; the only reason why no one was doing anything was because everyone had already tried. Just like their parents, they were fiercely spirited, they bowed down to no one.

"Do you see why I always tell you and Finn to wait?" Polly pointed out, taking a defeated puff of her cigarette.

"That's a pregnancy prevention advert if I ever saw one." I laughed.

However, our sly smiles disappeared as another kid yelled. Would these brats ever be quiet? I could see Tommy getting agitated, this Christmas charity gala was important. We were all representing the Shelby name and company, the kids were supposed to butter up the guests, but at this rate they would only get on their last nerve.

"John, can't you do something about your fucking children?" Arthur didn't refrain from swearing.

"Well, they do take after their parents, don't they?" Linda snidely remarked.

Everyone ignored her. Finn came to stand beside me, kissing me gently on the side of my head before wrapping his arm around me.

"Almost makes me never want to have sex again." he said.

I tried to hold back a laugh."Careful what you wish for."

"But seriously, can no one get them to just stand still for five seconds?"

"They don't listen to anyone. Must be a Shelby thing."

He nudged me."Oi, you'll be a Shelby soon."

"Soon?"

"Well, you know what I meant, I-"

"I know my ring size if that helps. I've also got some ideas-"

"Alright, alright." he laughed, pulling me closer to him.

Once again, the moment was ruined when John and Esme tried separating two of their kids, who wouldn't let go of each other, one pulling hair whilst the other almost ripped the others shirt.

"John, Esme, for all that's fucking holy, can you just get your children to behave? Even Charlie is staying away from them." Tommy stressed.

"Do you have twenty kids? No. So you don't understand that it's impossible to tame them." Esme snapped back as she struggled with the child in her arms.

"It's the gypsy blood, they've got too much of it." Polly added.

"This is a fucking nightmare." Tommy groaned.

"Right!" I shouted above the kids, causing everyone to fall silent."I don't understand why you kids are acting like this so close to Christmas. Father Christmas will only leave you sacks of coal if you keep behaving this way."

"But we're bored!" one shouted.

"We don't want to be here!"

"My suit is itchy!"

"I wanted a pink dress, not a purple one!"

"Enough!" I yelled. I felt a little silly doing this in front of everyone, but I had babysat these kids enough times to know what to do."Charlie, can you pass me your chalkboard please?"

He did as he was told, also handing me a white piece of chalk.

"So, Charlie, you want violin lessons for Christmas, right?"

He nodded. I wrote his name and what he wanted.

Writing down all the children's names, I then asked each of them what they wanted. They slowly approached me as I was writing. When finished, I turned the board around to show them.

"Each time you lot don't do as we say, you get a tick next to your name. If you get three ticks, you won't get what you want for Christmas. And since you guys have been like this all morning, everyone but Charlie is getting a tick."

Cries of protest rang out as I ticked each one. I didn't even glance up as I spoke.

"Don't make me give you a second tick already."

Silence again.

A knock on the door caught everyone's attention, it was a servant."Mr Shelby, they're ready for you all now."

"Right, thank you." Tommy turned to all of us."Everyone on their best behaviour, otherwise no one is getting any fucking presents."

The gala was like any other we had attended, just with a Christmas flair. I did love this time of year, the decorations made everything so cosy, and festive drinks and treats were being handed out. I kept an eye on the kids, trying to get it in their heads that they couldn't escape the ticks. They were actually being good, I could see everyone relaxing a bit. Instead of arguing, they were playing, and yes they were running around guests, but they were laughing at the sight of children enjoying themselves. Everyone was in the Christmas spirit.

I was returning from powering my nose when someone grabbed me from my hips. I let out a yelp, quickly looking back to see it was Finn. We were both giggling as he dragged me back down the corridor.

"Finn, what are you doing?" I asked in a hushed tone, now finding ourselves in an empty cupboard.

"I just thought I could give you a Christmas present early." he smirked, instantly starting to kiss me.

I didn't argue, using the collar of his suit jacket to pull him on closer. We could feel each others smiles as we kissed, one hand wandering down to my breast, the other gripping onto my bum. We would knock into the surrounding walls due to how small the cupboard was, causing us to try and hold back laughter. Suddenly light hit us from outside, the door now wide open, one of John's kids staring at us.

"You broke one of uncle Tom's rules!" they pointed at us.

"And what was that?" Finn asked, an annoyed tone in his voice as we hurriedly composed ourselves.

"We all had to stay in the hall. You are both getting a tick next to your name."

They sprinted off, and we were left in shock. They hadn't technically seen anything they weren't supposed to, but they almost did. We shrugged at each other, Finn slamming the door shut once again. Back in darkness, things started to get serious, my dress was now pushed up to my waist, I was pinned against the wall, finding it almost impossible not to moan. Finn was unbuckling his belt, I heard his trousers hit the floor when the door was opened again. We both screamed, pulling up/down our clothes rapidly.

It was the fucking kids again, though more than one this time, and they also screamed. We poked our heads out of the door as they ran off.

"Shit, I hope they don't go back into the hall. We should remove the ticks for them seeing that." I stressed.

"I feel like we're going to get all three ticks next to our names now."

[justimagineitblog]

You Used To Love Me: Michael Gray Fan Fiction

links to the chapters :))) - UP TO DATE !! 

CHAPTER 1

CHAPTER 2

CHAPTER 3

CHAPTER 4

CHAPTER 5

CHAPTER 6

CHAPTER 7

CHAPTER 8

CHAPTER 9

CHAPTER 10

CHAPTER 11

CHAPTER 12

SYNOPSIS:  

Isabelle was Michael’s one true love. His soulmate. But when duty calls and he leaves Birmingham for America, he suddenly cuts off communications with her and his family.

Isabelle is left wondering what went wrong and dreaming of the day he comes home. Months pass by without a word from him, until one fateful day when Michael returns out of the blue with more than just his luggage… he also has a wife, Gina.

A blind sided and heartbroken Isabelle tries to understand who this new, cold Michael is, while he acts as though she never existed… until the cracks begin to show.

Is the real Michael still underneath?

And does he still love Isabelle?

CAST: 

Finn Cole as “Michael Gray”

Lily James as “Isabelle”

andddd the remainder of the Peaky Blinders characters as themselves ;)