#Except for all my guy friends they’re useless lmfaooo

[mushroominaforest]

Update on creepy girl for those who care!

In light of my efforts to avoid her and our lack of classes together, creepy girl has sorta been like. Stalking me??? Kinda???

(This was from Keychain btw she’s the one with the reddish pink hair dye)

So I got that while I was in class, so when I left I made sure to walk with one of my friends (I don’t normally do that) and sure enough like five seconds into the hallway creepy girl spawned behind me lmao. Didn’t try anything though because I had Mothball with me.

She’s also been showing up during my spare as well as while I’m in the hallway, but she’s yet to catch me without any of my friends. Also tried to show up while I was walking home from school, but I’ve been getting my friends to drive me home lately. (I have been very careful to literally always be with my friends. Creepy girl won’t do anything when they’re around, she knows they’ll kill her.)

Also today when she showed up and sat with me and Keychain during spare she sorta whispered to me that she knows my locker code now??? Idk if that’s like supposed to be a threat, but like… it was kinda weird. Not sure what she’s gonna do with that information though.

Anyways, I know she’s been trying to catch me alone, but luckily she’s yet to succeed. We’ll see what happens when she inevitably does.

[edwardslostalchemy]

Y’all I just want to talk about one of my best friends because I really appreciate him and his friendship. 

Like I have mentioned him before. He and I constantly get shipped together. He is a year younger than I am. We’ve known each other since I was in first grade and he was in kinder, so we were TINY. We weren’t really close in elementary school because of the grade difference, but we knew each other and he basically lives across from my grandmother’s house. I remember his mom would see me and she’d send me to take things to him in class. In junior high we hung out because he was friends with my friends, too. And in high school, it was the same thing. We had a couple of conflicts that we resolved, which was good, but other than that, our friendship has been really fucking nice. In high school, I remember I went to pick him up from his class for an assembly and we got locked in the damn classroom and we were so close to screaming, we’re fucking useless. Anyway, I guess we made it out because here we are lmfaooo. All of our friends and us would sit together and from that big group, seven of us stayed in our main best friend group (the group chat is called Familia, but I asked him to take me out because messages give me anxiety rip). 

Anyway, he is very attentive to what my friends and I say and he has a good memory for things. He looks out for me when I don’t because I have dumb bitch energy and I’m an anxious bisexual fuck, so he knows that SOMEONE has to look out for me because if he doesn’t, our other friends will, but not as like...well as him, I guess. But YEAH. I have had to go on a gluten-free diet in the past because bread and other flour/baked foods would make my stomach cry. I’m also lactose intolerant. I don’t drink coffee and I love tea. I’m a lightweight so I can only have one drink per hangout because I get tipsy out of nothing tbh ridic. And there’s other details that he just remembers like he has it written on an index card or some shit. Which is NICE. So whenever we are going to eat something that has bread/cookies/cake/baked goods, he looks at it first and then reminds me “This is a cookie. Do you still want it?” And I’m like “Yeah give it to me fuck it.” Or he tells me “this frosting has milk, so bring your pill to eat dairy.” He is the only friend that’s done this and I honestly appreciate everything he has done for me and my life’s preservation because I, for one, do not give a fuck about my health sometimes and just go “fuck give it to me”, but then he pulls a stop sign on me like “you dumbass this is gonna fuck up your stomach.” He has also been there for me during very dark times like my past 5 years of depression and anxiety, me distancing myself, my suicidal ideations, my grandfather’s death, and me going through a lot of shit because of my sexuality. Like when I need to talk, he’s there. I will never forget that. And I told him this last night, that I’m really glad we’re friends and that he’s the only one out of our group that keeps in touch with me because I struggle with communication. Like if anyone has ever messaged me, you know I can go days or weeks without answering. He knows and understands, though sometimes jokes to not ghost him (I don’t do it on purpose!), and he sends me messages and doesn’t pressure me to answer him. 

What strained our friendship the most was how everyone would ship us (still ship us???). We are very close. We hug. We’ve called each other dumb nicknames to fuck around like “My love” and “My life”, but we know we’re joking. We sit together, or side by side all the time. That is our place. And he is the only one whom I feel comfortable sitting on my left side. I am blind from my left eye so I always always feel uncomfortable when someone sits/walks on my left side because I can’t see them. He is the exception because I can hear him and he also draws my attention before anything so he doesn’t surprise me. Anyway, yeah we also tend to share food/drinks. We also hold eye contact with one another like we are very attentive to each other. I guess we give off that ‘couple’ vibe?? But we are just really good, close friends and it honestly killed me whenever someone would bring up the ‘dating’ topic. Like we went with it for a while. When we would get asked if we were together, we would say yes. We would pretend and we didn’t need to do much to pull it off because people already thought we were together. Until he asked me to tone it down and I just went ahead and stopped because it was getting to me as well. It sucked. I really hate how society just thinks that if a guy and a girl are close, they are a couple. Even my aunts thought we were together. My aunt asked me all the time if we were a thing and I was like “No.” Even my own mother wanted me to date him. It was too much. I had to spend time away from him. I actually needed space. I was not comfortable and I had to just spend time away so that I could like feel like myself. I think about that and I honestly feel my stomach churning. I never liked him in a romantic way. I thought I did because everyone would tell us this and that and God, I wish people would just shut up. I doubt he ever liked me like that, either, which is a GOOD thing. If I remember correctly, he told me he didn’t like me like that (???) because I was with my boss when I mentioned it and I had to talk to someone about it and my boss was like ‘well it’s good you know now’ and I was really happy about it! (I think this was the first time I went ‘I’m ace/aro’, but never acknowledged it until later). So yeah. So don’t ship people please. It feels like hell tbh. 

Our friendship is still Gucci and we still go out, though I noticed that since I left for uni I’ve been distant because of my poor communication skills. But he knows I’d never forget him. It’s kinda hard to do so when he lives two blocks away from my house lmfao. And right in front of my grandmother’s. I really hope we can remain good friends in the future. It’s just really nice to have someone like that in my life. I just started thinking about this because I gave him a Christmas present last night and he got me something, too. And even though we were going out with friends, I only got him and another friend a gift. I don’t have money right now, I’m flat broke and I’m waiting for student loans to save me because that pays rent and groceries. But I got him and our other friend something because they’re just real MVPs in my life, but moreso him. Idk I just wanted to talk about him because he’s a great human being and a wonderful friend and I hope good things happen to him.