#Evening wear Toronto
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ukdesignersale · 4 months ago
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Beautiful November
As well as launching our newest and sparkliest party wear in our Beaches store we’re also hosting a series of beauty and fashion evenings to make you look even more fabulous over the Holiday season! Our local professionals are ready to transform you – just message me to book any one of our events – places are limited. We can also offer private evenings for you and your friends! Location
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3416 · 1 year ago
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he's so mad he couldn't be a speedskater with auston, mo, knies, and minten 😭
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vexx-the-egg · 6 months ago
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Hey.man I'm going to say it. Too many people are being REALLY wierd about the whole "US/Canadian mikus. Genuinely as a Hispanic/Asian person. What counts as culture to you? What do you get out of putting down fun lighthearted drawings of convience store miku? "Oh US/BRIT/CAN DONT HAVE CULTURE. EVERYONE POINT AND LAUGH." Treating casual clothes from a foreign country as more exotic and culturally rich is not the woke take you think it is. stop being wierd.
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mxaether · 1 year ago
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my vest needs a whole wash in the sink, i think. i should do some repairs and updates before comic con in march, maybe. I need to source myself some fandom hockey stuff, make some space. Or.... i could start a new vest. Hmmmm. Do i do black or a dark denim?
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eyes-above--the-waves · 2 years ago
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This morning’s internal dialogue:
Me: You should wear your Marner/Leafs shirt to work today. It’s casual Friday. 
Also Me: Yeah, but they lost last night, so maybe not the best day.
Me: I guess...OH, BUT IT’S MITCH’S BIRTHDAY, YOU COULD WEAR IT BECAUSE OF THAT!
Also Me: Yeah, but then you have to explain to your coworkers why you know this.
Me: BUT - 
Also Me: STOP! YOU’RE 33!!
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russell-crowe · 2 years ago
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one day i might actually write an essay on russells relationship with masculinity and (over-)performing masculinity in his search for his own identity during the 90s till about the mid zeroes
#text#i am not actually too serious about this but at the same time a happy student when it comes to russell#as a kid he self-describes himself as shy and there are some people from that era who agree with that#but at the same time he had a bit of a troublemaker image#which he hated because nobody took him serious when it came to things he cared about (english and history)#then i think he found comfort in performing somehow#i believe that there is a branch of actors who might not even be too confident#but who excel in controlled environments#because ESPECIALLY 90s russell was just... a bit of a bundle or nerves#just watch any interview with him and his body language#he is constantly fidgeting and sitting different etc#and he played so many roles that he put himself into to the max#and where he would visit gay clubs for or would walk around like a skinhead to understand peoples reaction#that i think it is easy to also start to live from performance to performance rather than to really figure out yourself#and that is the recipe that in 99/00/01 etc blossomed into Very Masculine russell in what looks at an attempt at figuring out himself#and also creating a very non hollywood image by wearing things either from south sydney or the toronto maple leafs etc#it is as if he created an over the top parody of all the elements of his life#especially after gladiator#with a motorbike and a specific type of clothes and rowdy behaviour#and then that kind of continued to be unstable until the late 00s where he seems to have figured it out for himself#and now he just seems. fine.#he doesnt see himself as hyper masculine but more the opposite (the whole i wear make up for a living and poetry thing)#which is a very.... Morrissey way of seeing yourself as not typically masculine but i take it from him lol#and he has reconnected with his kiwi roots#he takes pride of his hobbies and happily tweets about it#he is still prickly about hollywood but that is just his authentic self#anyway consider these notes in the margins etc etc
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qazastra · 8 months ago
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gdi thinking about tokyo police club again ... they have two new songs and on spotify u know how the artists can write a little blurb about their picks... it says 'it's the last new TPC songs!' im SICKKKK
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modestwear · 1 year ago
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Modest Wear, Mississauga, Your go-to destination for exquisite evening gowns in Mississauga. Elevate your style with grace and charm.
Contact Us: +1905 614 0992
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tastesousweet · 2 months ago
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⭒ crush
| hamzahthefantastic x youtuber!reader au
summary: hamzah has a crush that is extremely obvious to everyone except you ... somehow?! (both written & smau!!!)
a/n: happy new years!!!!!!
— march 2024
hamzah is hungry beyond belief.
martin's already assured him both over facetime and text that he's on his way with their full course meal of chinese takeout— currently sat in the basket of martin's rented bike, jostling up and down with every bump of the toronto pavement without a doubt. yet his stomach is still throwing a tantrum, depraved of any nutrients while his brain repeats in a neanderthal-like manner "food. coming. soon." in hopes of reducing the pressure within his poor stomach.
he opens instagram, needing some sort of an escape, because naturally a little doom-scrolling will ease his (dramatic but still very real) pain. somehow, among the ridiculous animal reels and comedic twitch clips on his explore feed, he stumbles upon a reel from you. a girl with a different quality and charm to your face and character than anything he's seen in other content creators.
not only does your bubbly yet elegant voice keep him watching but the subject matter is rather fitting— you're cooking a homemade chicken pot pie for the first time. in the video you talk about how often your mother would prepare it growing up and now it's become a popular craving for you. hamzah watches intently as if he were ready to get up and make his own pot pie alongside you.
"hey! the hell are you smiling at?" martin's voice is breathy due to his trek to and from the chinese restaurant. he walks into the living room holding a crinkly plastic bag reading: "thank you! have a nice day!" with that big, yellow smiley face in between.
"huh? nothin'." hamzah dismisses and adjusts himself on the couch, "come on, 'm starving!" he reaches his hand out to take the food from martin before patting the seat next to him.
ᡣ𐭩 •。ꪆৎ ˚⋅
— june 2024
"so when are you gonna come see us?"
it was a surprise to see hamzah follow you on instagram a few months ago. you'd heard his name thrown around in certain spaces of the internet but never really indulged in any of his content.
his instagram had the format of a shitposting ten-year-old but it only made you curious about the humorous twenty-something. eventually you'd watched a youtube video of his; completely laughing your ass off and finding your eyes chasing after hamzah whenever he was in even the tiniest of frames.
it was never a serious crush by any means, just a nice piece of secret eye-candy who also happened to have a great personality and an enviously good work ethic (the effort martin and hamzah put into their videos was astonishing to you).
so you were quite nervous to be the first to dm him, in hopes of a friendship or a least a quick exchange of "hey." it was only right — you two had been liking each other's poss and stories a consistent amount.
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the mellow first exchange between the two of you in april blossomed into you both constantly talking in your free time; your friendship quickly to developed a flirty back-and-forth dynamic that sometimes borders on way more than platonic. eventually martin was added to your consistent facetime calls and you’ve even let them convince you to create a discord account to play minecraft and grand theft auto online with them.
and now you’re lying on your leather couch with both of their faces displayed in your laptop’s screen, eager to hear your response.
“i don’t know…” you play with a loose end of the sweater you’re wearing, “what would we even do?”
they both stay quiet for a moment before hamzah laughs, “why are you acting like you don’t wanna say yes right now?”
a smile slowly grows on your face “okay… gimme a second,” you begin to google flight information to and from toronto.
ᡣ𐭩 •。ꪆৎ ˚⋅
— september 2024
yourusername
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Liked by clairedrake, hamzahthefantastic, and others
yourusername Y’all didn’t tell me they get wild in the 6 , Omg??!! Highly requested video out neow <3
View all comments
chaserutherford 🍽️8️⃣ • ♥︎ by author
yourusername I rlly do miss u already 😖😖😖😖
ynfan01 ohhhh this was so necessary thank u mother☺️!! • ♥︎ by author
yourusername Mhm!!! Olivia Wilde head nod 💞💞
slushieeee333 y/n: slurping pasta , hamzah the whole time: 😊👀😍😊
thatmartinkid hey look ma i made it!!! 🫵😂 • ♥︎ by author
ynsnumberone THE FLIRTING WENT CRAZYYYYY
slushedyn her and hamzah are obsessed with each other i fear
thatslushykid COME BACK 2 TORONTO ASAP I NEED MORE COLLABS RN!!!!!! 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
hamzahluver45 ok but like it’s so obvious that her trying to flirt was just irritating them the whole time !! Like girl ..💀💀
hamzahthefantastic Posting our dms is already one thing , but TAGGING ME is actually crazy 🤔🤔 • ♥︎ by author
yourusername R u mad @ me Bby???? 😕
hamzahthefantastic BruhLmaooooooooooo
freakzahfan that's one too many "o"s just say u wanna kiss her my boy
ᡣ𐭩 •。ꪆৎ ˚⋅
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“oh!” you accidentally trip over yourself while walking backwards and stumble into hamzah, who was standing in front of the unfamiliar grocery store, watching you prepare to give an intro. “jesus,” martin laughs under his breath from behind the camera. he lowers the camera, showing his feet but still picking up his voice in the mic, “you good?!”
the clip cuts to you stood upright again, "i'm in the six!!!" you exclaim loudly, raising your arms above your head. "and i'm here with slushy noobz to add to my series where other creators "teach me" their specialty. you tug at hamzah's arm and pull him into the frame with you, "hamzah tell them what you and martin are gonna teach me," you look up a him while still holding onto his arm. you interrupt him before he even begins to speak, "oh yeah! martin is also here by the way!" you point and martin flips the camera to himself. "they're just leaving me out it's fine, i know i'm out already, just vote just vote," he references with a sigh before turning it back to you and hamzah. "don't start! chase is on his way to come and film for us-" "listen! this is our plan-- we're gonna teach you how to mukbang; everyone knows we're very qualified in this field and know everything there is to know about the subject, so, uhh, yeah we're kinda experts. i dont know, would you say that, martin?" hamzah rambles. "yeah, i think that's a good way to describe us" "perfect! then you're teachin' me how to kiss next, right?" you ask. hamzah goes from looking at you attentively (hanging onto your every word) to a face deadpanned as he glances over to martin trying not to smile.
the video cuts to a clip with the three of you, finally, all in one shot now that chase is behind the camera. you pull a cart out from its slot and push yourself on it before standing both feet on top of the tiny foot bar, gliding through the automatic doors.
next, a clip of martin speaking to the camera while you and hamzah look through different pasta sauces together, "okay we didn't really explain this well but essentially we're all going to cook a nice dish and then eat it together in front of you guys. isn't that cute?" "yeah, can't wait for us to mukbang together" hamzah speaks. martin turns back to the camera with a smirk, "i bet you wish you were mukbanging with us huh, chase?" "no. and you just made that word up." martin's face falls.
the entire grocery shopping trip is filmed with little moments like hamzah mispronouncing a few brand names, martin talking to strangers about which pasta noodle to try, and you randomly walking off into estranged aisles "just to see if things are really different here"
now, you're all back at martin's home; you read aloud the recipe and hamzah is stood practically on top of you as he also looks down at the phone, all while martin lays ingredients out of the counter. "okay simple enough," hamzah says. "yeah, and you're still gonna make me do all of the work anyway," martin huffs sarcastically. you giggle a bit, "martin the most you'll have to do is boil water, i'll force him to do the rest." "huh???!! who??" hamzah questions, his smiley face “accidentally” leaning far too close to yours. "you, duh!" you laugh and turn away to look for a large pot.
throughout the cooking process you slowly stop helping; talking to mandy while you two eat chips and salsa while leaning on the counter or petting the pets instead of doing any of the tasks given to you from the self-proclaimed chefs.
"this is literally your video! what the hell y/n?!" martin whines when he finds you and mandy making a tiktok in his "man cave" together after you'd told them you were going to the bathroom, "seriously mandy?" all of the audio can be heard from the mics on your clothing. "where was she?" hamzah says monotonous as he scrolls on his phone. "making freaking tiktoks with mandy of course!" you giggle as you walk into the kitchen behind him, "what? the food is practically done, we're just waiting on garlic bread!" you shrug and hamzah immediately turns at the sound of your voice. "well, you gonna at least show us?" hamzah asks casually placing his hands on the counter around you, trapping you in the space between him and the marble surface. "yeah," you tilt your head so you can look at his face as you make fun of his not-so-friendly gesture, "you wanna keep breathing down my neck like that while i show you?" he laughs and moves away to cover up the embarrassment of being called out. "stop!" you laugh and bring him back into frame forcing him and martin to watch you and mandy dance on your phone screen.
the four of you sit on the carpet with plates full of chicken alfredo and pieces of garlic bread laid out on martin’s coffee table. you all talk about your experience in toronto so far, how you and hamzah first met, … et cetera.
martin attempts to teach you canadian slang: “keener is big here.” “actually? what the hell does that even mean?” “it’s kinda like a try hard— people will call you a keener if you’re doing too much, basically.” “wait tell me more!” “i mean things like buddy is way too common here. some random old guys will call me that and it always throws me off??” “yeah they always say it so demeaning,” hamzah laughs. “do you guys actually say ‘eh?’ all the time? i feel like i haven’t noticed it a lot.” you ask genuinely. “i won't lie.. i say it more often than i like to admit!” mandy says. you’ve noticed that no matter if you’re the one speaking or not hamzah’s eyes keep glancing and sometimes full on staring at you (he really doesn’t mean to but he thinks he’s finally processing that you’re actually here with them after months of wanting this) you're flattered nonetheless.
at some point hamzah and martin recreate a scene in lady and the tramp, successfully slurping at the same noodle until hamzah retreats and martin sighs at his lack of commiting to the bit. you laugh along before asking hamzah’s to share a noodle with you with a smile slapped over your face, “me next?” he fights off any blushing with a roll of his eyes and his response of, “yeah? ask me again in a sec.”
after you’ve all finished eating, you complete the video with a big smile and a promise of more collaborations in the future.
���𐭩 •。ꪆৎ ˚⋅
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lovecla · 13 days ago
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TBH ; LUKE HUGHES
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PAIR ex-luke hughes x fem!reader, auston matthews x fem!reader
SUMMARY maybe luke hughes’ passion isn’t enough. he just doesn’t know about it, yet.
WORD COUNT 1.1k
WARNINGS suggestive, jealous luke, size kink, heavily inspired by the song ‘tbh’ by partynextdoor, lowkey toxic luke, mentions of sex.
FROM ME TO YOU listen, i know i have, like, one hundred and twenty things to write but this is one of my favorite songs and i just wanted to leave this here!!! this is something super short, messy and not at all my style, but i still wanted to do something with this song. i’d recommend reading this while listening to the song ;) as always, i love you and have a nice reading!
𐙚
HE COULD’VE swear he felt it when you entered the room.
It wouldn’t be easy to explain if he tried to, but with the way the hairs on his arms stood up when you stepped into the room, he knew he was screwed.
He was sitting on the couch across the room, with a couple of people standing in front of him, as he discussed with Curtis about something he now can’t seem to remember.
“Duude.” He heard Curtis calling him, and he nodded, his perfectly styled curls moving with his head.
“Yeah?” He answered, but he didn’t bother turning around to look at his teammate. No, he couldn’t. Not when you had just entered the room with no one other than the captain of the Toronto Maple Leafs, Auston Matthews.
Luke didn’t know what he was feeling, but he knew it wasn’t right. He was sitting somewhere angry and frustrated as he watched the way your body seemed to float towards Auston’s. The dress you had chosen for that night would probably be in his thanksgiving speech, because he was, indeed, thankful for the opportunity to see you wearing something like that: short, white, almost transparent with a huge slit in the middle, that left little to the imagination.
He didn’t even know why he was noticing you in the first place, since he remembers how he was the one who fucked everything up between the two of you, but fuck. He can’t really help it.
The way you’re laughing at the shit Matthews’s saying, the way you blush slightly under the warm lighting whenever he touches your waist or lower back. The way Luke can tell everyone thinks how much the two of you look good together.
And it infuriates him.
But now— now, you have finally noticed him. You were scanning the room with your eyes when you made eye contact with him, dropping your smile in a millisecond. He can see the way you gulp and hold Auston’s hand a bit tighter.
Luke watches as you force yourself to draw your attention back to the conversation happening in front of you, but he feels accomplished when he notices that, once in a while, you will look at him, for nothing more than a second.
Still.
He finishes the rest of his beer, feeling the bitter taste of it fill up his mouth. He wants to scream at himself to let you go, to stop staring at you like a fucking creep, to not let his mind wander through dangerous, dangerous memories.
Yet, he does none of these things.
He just watches the way your nipples pierced the dress you were wearing, hard and there for everyone to see. He licks his lips, remembering how happy he was when you’d told him you weren’t much of a bra type of girl.
You say something to Matthews before kissing his cheek and excusing yourself, walking towards what Luke assumed to be the bathroom.
“Man,” he hears Curtis, again. “She’s not yours anymore.”
And? He wants to ask. “I know.” Is all he says.
Knowing that you aren’t his anymore doesn't stop him from getting up and going after you, leaving the beer bottle on the table sitting in the corner before walking down the expensive hallway until he’s standing at the door.
“Luke, what—” he hears you asking, but he doesn’t say anything. He just walks inside the bathroom with you and closes the door behind him, hungrily eyeing your body, as he had been doing for the past few minutes.
“Y/n,” is what he says, and you have to pretend that hearing him say your name for the first time in months doesn’t affect you. Because it shouldn’t. “I miss you.”
“What the hell are you talking about, Luke?” You hear yourself asking— you’ve fantasized about this scenario several times before and you’re still not sure of what you’re supposed to do. “You can’t just say things like that. I’m with Auston now and God,” you put your right hand on your forehead. “If anyone sees us here, together, then—”
“I can see that you’re with him,” he scoffs. “It’s all over your face. The way you look at him makes me sick.”
“I’m afraid there’s nothing I can do about that,” you say, crossing your arms in front of your chest, not missing the way his eyes linger around your boobs for longer than they should. “Luke.”
“Does he know you used to belong to me?”
His question takes you by surprise, and you bite your lips, suppressing a frustrated moan. “If you let me end things with you because you didn’t want to make our relationship public, then why would I tell people about it? It was your choice not to.”
He knew you were right. And that made him even more upset.
“Then he doesn’t know about the things we did,” he whispers, standing tall in front of you, making you realize once again that he’s much larger than you, much bigger, much stronger. “He doesn’t know about how loud I could make you scream, how wet your pussy would get whenever you saw me, how you loved when I threw you around like you were nothing but a toy.”
“Luke—” you sigh, but he shakes his head, while pressing his thumb against your bottom lip. His touch burned.
“How when we first started dating you’d cry because you were so worried that I wouldn’t fit,” he chuckles, like the memory itself is enough to make him laugh. “And how you cried even more when I made it fit, when I forced my cock inside that tight, little cunt of yours.”
“Luke, stop,” you mumble against his finger. “You… you shouldn’t be telling me this. We’re— we’re over.”
“No, Y/n, we aren’t,” he says, kissing your cheek, gently. “I miss it when you’d lay with me, body so tiny next to mine it makes me hard just thinking about it,” he presses his finger harder against you. “I miss it, Y/n.”
You sigh, closing your eyes.
“So, tell me, baby, are you with me?”
You shake your head.
“No,” you say, even if you don’t want to. “Not anymore.”
“Y/n, fuck. I loved you.” He reasons, and you open your eyes, just to frown at him.
“Your passion, or whatever you want to call it, isn’t enough,” you answer, stepping away from his touch. “You don’t have what I need.”
“Liar.”
“Maybe,” you whisper. “But that’s just how life is.”
“You’re not being honest with yourself, Y/n, you want me.” He argues, scrunching his curls in his hands.
“Are you trying to convince me or yourself?” You ask, raising your eyebrow before turning around and leaving the room.
Leaving Luke and your history with him behind.
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if you want more… ! (˶˃ ᵕ ˂˶)
LUKE HUGHES MASTERLIST.
NHL MASTERLIST.
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mostlysignssomeportents · 1 year ago
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How plausible sentence generators are changing the bullshit wars
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This Friday (September 8) at 10hPT/17hUK, I'm livestreaming "How To Dismantle the Internet" with Intelligence Squared.
On September 12 at 7pm, I'll be at Toronto's Another Story Bookshop with my new book The Internet Con: How to Seize the Means of Computation.
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In my latest Locus Magazine column, "Plausible Sentence Generators," I describe how I unwittingly came to use – and even be impressed by – an AI chatbot – and what this means for a specialized, highly salient form of writing, namely, "bullshit":
https://locusmag.com/2023/09/commentary-by-cory-doctorow-plausible-sentence-generators/
Here's what happened: I got stranded at JFK due to heavy weather and an air-traffic control tower fire that locked down every westbound flight on the east coast. The American Airlines agent told me to try going standby the next morning, and advised that if I booked a hotel and saved my taxi receipts, I would get reimbursed when I got home to LA.
But when I got home, the airline's reps told me they would absolutely not reimburse me, that this was their policy, and they didn't care that their representative had promised they'd make me whole. This was so frustrating that I decided to take the airline to small claims court: I'm no lawyer, but I know that a contract takes place when an offer is made and accepted, and so I had a contract, and AA was violating it, and stiffing me for over $400.
The problem was that I didn't know anything about filing a small claim. I've been ripped off by lots of large American businesses, but none had pissed me off enough to sue – until American broke its contract with me.
So I googled it. I found a website that gave step-by-step instructions, starting with sending a "final demand" letter to the airline's business office. They offered to help me write the letter, and so I clicked and I typed and I wrote a pretty stern legal letter.
Now, I'm not a lawyer, but I have worked for a campaigning law-firm for over 20 years, and I've spent the same amount of time writing about the sins of the rich and powerful. I've seen a lot of threats, both those received by our clients and sent to me.
I've been threatened by everyone from Gwyneth Paltrow to Ralph Lauren to the Sacklers. I've been threatened by lawyers representing the billionaire who owned NSOG roup, the notoroious cyber arms-dealer. I even got a series of vicious, baseless threats from lawyers representing LAX's private terminal.
So I know a thing or two about writing a legal threat! I gave it a good effort and then submitted the form, and got a message asking me to wait for a minute or two. A couple minutes later, the form returned a new version of my letter, expanded and augmented. Now, my letter was a little scary – but this version was bowel-looseningly terrifying.
I had unwittingly used a chatbot. The website had fed my letter to a Large Language Model, likely ChatGPT, with a prompt like, "Make this into an aggressive, bullying legal threat." The chatbot obliged.
I don't think much of LLMs. After you get past the initial party trick of getting something like, "instructions for removing a grilled-cheese sandwich from a VCR in the style of the King James Bible," the novelty wears thin:
https://www.emergentmind.com/posts/write-a-biblical-verse-in-the-style-of-the-king-james
Yes, science fiction magazines are inundated with LLM-written short stories, but the problem there isn't merely the overwhelming quantity of machine-generated stories – it's also that they suck. They're bad stories:
https://www.npr.org/2023/02/24/1159286436/ai-chatbot-chatgpt-magazine-clarkesworld-artificial-intelligence
LLMs generate naturalistic prose. This is an impressive technical feat, and the details are genuinely fascinating. This series by Ben Levinstein is a must-read peek under the hood:
https://benlevinstein.substack.com/p/how-to-think-about-large-language
But "naturalistic prose" isn't necessarily good prose. A lot of naturalistic language is awful. In particular, legal documents are fucking terrible. Lawyers affect a stilted, stylized language that is both officious and obfuscated.
The LLM I accidentally used to rewrite my legal threat transmuted my own prose into something that reads like it was written by a $600/hour paralegal working for a $1500/hour partner at a white-show law-firm. As such, it sends a signal: "The person who commissioned this letter is so angry at you that they are willing to spend $600 to get you to cough up the $400 you owe them. Moreover, they are so well-resourced that they can afford to pursue this claim beyond any rational economic basis."
Let's be clear here: these kinds of lawyer letters aren't good writing; they're a highly specific form of bad writing. The point of this letter isn't to parse the text, it's to send a signal. If the letter was well-written, it wouldn't send the right signal. For the letter to work, it has to read like it was written by someone whose prose-sense was irreparably damaged by a legal education.
Here's the thing: the fact that an LLM can manufacture this once-expensive signal for free means that the signal's meaning will shortly change, forever. Once companies realize that this kind of letter can be generated on demand, it will cease to mean, "You are dealing with a furious, vindictive rich person." It will come to mean, "You are dealing with someone who knows how to type 'generate legal threat' into a search box."
Legal threat letters are in a class of language formally called "bullshit":
https://press.princeton.edu/books/hardcover/9780691122946/on-bullshit
LLMs may not be good at generating science fiction short stories, but they're excellent at generating bullshit. For example, a university prof friend of mine admits that they and all their colleagues are now writing grad student recommendation letters by feeding a few bullet points to an LLM, which inflates them with bullshit, adding puffery to swell those bullet points into lengthy paragraphs.
Naturally, the next stage is that profs on the receiving end of these recommendation letters will ask another LLM to summarize them by reducing them to a few bullet points. This is next-level bullshit: a few easily-grasped points are turned into a florid sheet of nonsense, which is then reconverted into a few bullet-points again, though these may only be tangentially related to the original.
What comes next? The reference letter becomes a useless signal. It goes from being a thing that a prof has to really believe in you to produce, whose mere existence is thus significant, to a thing that can be produced with the click of a button, and then it signifies nothing.
We've been through this before. It used to be that sending a letter to your legislative representative meant a lot. Then, automated internet forms produced by activists like me made it far easier to send those letters and lawmakers stopped taking them so seriously. So we created automatic dialers to let you phone your lawmakers, this being another once-powerful signal. Lowering the cost of making the phone call inevitably made the phone call mean less.
Today, we are in a war over signals. The actors and writers who've trudged through the heat-dome up and down the sidewalks in front of the studios in my neighborhood are sending a very powerful signal. The fact that they're fighting to prevent their industry from being enshittified by plausible sentence generators that can produce bullshit on demand makes their fight especially important.
Chatbots are the nuclear weapons of the bullshit wars. Want to generate 2,000 words of nonsense about "the first time I ate an egg," to run overtop of an omelet recipe you're hoping to make the number one Google result? ChatGPT has you covered. Want to generate fake complaints or fake positive reviews? The Stochastic Parrot will produce 'em all day long.
As I wrote for Locus: "None of this prose is good, none of it is really socially useful, but there’s demand for it. Ironically, the more bullshit there is, the more bullshit filters there are, and this requires still more bullshit to overcome it."
Meanwhile, AA still hasn't answered my letter, and to be honest, I'm so sick of bullshit I can't be bothered to sue them anymore. I suppose that's what they were counting on.
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If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/09/07/govern-yourself-accordingly/#robolawyers
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Image: Cryteria (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:HAL9000.svg
CC BY 3.0
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en
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3416 · 2 years ago
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when people talk about auston leaving toronto... kinda wanna light them on fire
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esotericbluntbaby · 1 month ago
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srry if this sounds stupid but like.. reader thats super short?? like 5'1
idk thinking abt the fact that he could just manhandle you is making me so ♡♡ i keep thinking abt that trend where he could pick you up and place you on his shoulders omg.. or maybe he makes u sit on his lap and stuff while he edits
also feel like he's super protective u (subconsiously he doesnt even realize it) always putting a hand around u type of thing
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hamzah x short!reader headcannons (sfw and nsfw)
mentions: reader gets insecure about their weight sometimes, manhandling, sexual activities, size kink
sfw!
being 5'10, hamzah was used to being taller than most people he knew. however, it hits way different when it comes to you. he enjoys having to look down at you whenever you're standing next to him; it gives him a slight ego boost about how tall he is.
though, being with someone short also has its downsides; sometimes hugging him when he's carrying all his film equipment is difficult. when side hugging him, he has to crouch down awkwardly or you have to go on the very tips of your toes in order to be able to.
you actually hate having to ask him for help on reaching things from high parts of your apartment; you've been independent for ages, so you feel like you should be able to simply grab whatever you need from the top. hamzah, however, hates it when you grab a chair to stand on. he thinks you'll somehow fall over and break something
hamzah walks in the room with a puzzled expression on his face, "hey baby? have you seen my- what are you doing?"
you looked down at him, standing on the counter, "i'm baking and i needed my measuring cups."
he grabs you by the waist and lifts you down with his hands, then reaching to the top of the cabinet with ease and grabbing the measuring cups you needed, "you could've just asked me."
whenever you get tired of walking around in heels, or your feet simply feel like they're bound to be raw instead of with skin, he carries you with ease. hamzah's a man who hates seeing his woman struggle with anything, yet he also didn't want to walk around toronto with only socks on the cold, dirty pavement. so, instead, he lifts you and carries you either bridal style or on his back.
he really has to lean down in order for you two to be able to kiss. whether it's a kiss on the cheek or a kiss on the lips, it's either he's bending down or you're on your toes. when you're in a situation where he can't bend over or he simply doesn't want to, forehead kisses are the next best option.
sometimes, he'll simply walk to wherever you are, grab you by the waist and hoist you onto his shoulder, and then take you to the couch to watch a movie with him. you don't really know how it started, but ever since he did it for the first time and you didn't seem to mind, he now does it probably once a week.
"hamzah, y'know you could've just asked me to come to the living room, right?"
"why would i do that?"
stealing his clothes is funny to him; it's been a running joke where, no matter how big the clothes you stole are, you'll still deny that it's his. he fakes being upset at it, but the blush he has on his cheeks tell a different story. one time, the roles reversed and he stole a tank top and basketball shorts from you.
"hamzah, what the hell are you wearing..?"
"just a little something from my closet ^-^"
if you ever get insecure about your weight, he makes it KNOWN that you weigh literally nothing to him. either by benchpressing your body or squatting it, he makes you laugh with all the movement he's making you go through. afterwards, he definitely reassures you that you're genuinely the most beautiful person he's ever seen; it's safe to say that you don't get insecure about your weight that often with him in your life.
nsfw!
hamzah's arms are absolutely ripped. therefore, he's able to switch your position whenever it's needed. cramping? he'll manhandle you and switch the position. tired? he'll manhandle you and switch the position. about to finish? he'll manhandle you and switch the position so that you feel as pleasured as possible when you release.
whenever he eats you out, he's able to overstimulate you as much as he can. his arms are almost always spreading your thighs apart, his promise ring making indents in your skin, even if your thighs are trying to squeeze his head off. occasionally, he lets you squeeze his head; contrary to popular belief, i think hamzah's a thigh and ass guy. being squeezed by how soft your thighs are turns him on even more.
the options for positions are ENDLESS. he's able to lift you and carry you for as long as both of you can last.
size kink. watching him rip you apart turns him on to the point where sometimes, he doesn't last as long as usual from the mere sight of your pornographic moans and having him enter and exit. watching you get tore apart also turns you on; he's so big and strong. that's your man, right there. only he's able to make you feel like this (and finish as fast as you do).
he wraps his hand around your wrists to restrain you; with the height difference, his hands are basically double the size of yours. he pins you down quite often, since missionary is probably one of his favorite positions. he likes seeing how blissful your expression is when he's deep inside of you.
authors note!
sorry i edged u guys the whole day with this LOLL! it's kinda short, but i hope u guys enjoy!
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ilyrafe · 9 months ago
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𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒍𝒅'𝒔 𝒂𝒑𝒂𝒓𝒕 ✧ 𝒓. 𝒄.
pairing: ex-boyfriend!rafe cameron x ex-girlfriend!reader
warnings: angst
word count: 1k
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“hi, rafe.”
just your voice is enough to decentralize him entirely. he didn’t expect to see you at sarah’s party, only because he didn’t know you were back to kildare.
you look beautiful as always. your hair is shorter, but that’s the only thing that has changed about you, at least, it’s what he can assume. the flower crown you’re wearing adorns your sage green dress beautifully.
“hi.” he takes a sip of his mock tail, trying to pretend he’s cool with you there, as if he knew.
“how have you been?”
“good.”
you know rafe too well. his short answers tell you he’s not at all amused by your presence, and that breaks your heart even more. he looks so handsome with a buzzcut, and it’s like he knows it.
“i guess you didn’t know i was coming.” you chuckle quite awkwardly. “sarah convinced me to come, she said it wouldn’t be an issue, but... if you want me to leave, i will.”
“i really don’t care what you do, y/n.”
you sigh, defeated. he’ll never forgive you for what you said. you thought that maybe he would have changed, or at least, understood your point, but you see that he hasn’t done either.
“okay, um... i’ll see you around, rafe.”
he watches you leave, and you’re not even pretending to be happy. he ruined your mood and he knows it. rafe sees sarah comforting you, and she shoots him a glare, making him roll his eyes and leave his spot at the bar.
he should probably leave, too.
when he turns his back and makes his way inside tanney hill, he doesn’t look back. he goes straight to his bedroom and plops down on his king sized bed. the music is muffled, thank god.
he’s been trying to make amends with sarah, even letting her come back home and be with john b in peace. sure, he doesn’t get along with the pogues, but if accepting them is what it takes for him to have the smallest sense of peace, he’ll do it.
rafe has also decided to get sober. after almost dying of an overdose, he was really scared and decided to quit. he wants to make ward proud. staying away from alcohol is a lot harder than quitting coke and marijuana, it turns out. the mock tails aren’t as enjoyable.
as if doing all that isn’t hard enough, you’re back. and with you being back, all of the feelings he’s successfully repressed are coming back up again, stronger than ever.
he hates that he’s given you this amount of power over him.
rafe never did feelings before, and the one time he did, you left him because of himself. rafe is his worst enemy.
he really loved you. well, scratch that. he never stopped loving you. you took care of him, you improved his relationship with ward and sarah. you asked him to quit drugs and selling it. you listened to him and you took none of his bullshit. you held him accountable while giving him grace.
deep down, he knows he fucked up. he wasn’t ready to grow up, but no one likes to say they’re wrong, do they?
“i just think it’s funny how you really believe this little island is an entire world for you.” you snorted. “but i know why you don’t wanna leave this shit hole. you’re a nobody outside the outer banks. there is no “kook versus pogue” once you step out of this place. you’re just another trust fund baby with drug issues to everyone else, rafe.”
he never understood your incessant need to “explore the world”, it’s so childish. you always talked about how you wanted to live in paris, toronto, tokyo, london, seoul, or berlin or whatever (honestly, you have mentioned so many cities, he has lost count), and you always said that you would be happy anywhere else, but rafe doesn’t see himself being happy far from north carolina. from kildare. from tanney hill. it’s where he comes from and where he wants to die. it’s what he knows.
a knock on his bedroom door interrupts his thoughts. rafe huffs and rolls his eyes. when he opens the door, he comes across you.
“what do you want?” he questions, irritated.
you enter his room and close the door behind you, drowning out the noise of the music once again. you’ve missed his bedroom. his bed.
“i think... i think i owe you an apology,” you say. “i shouldn’t have been so mean to you that day, it wasn’t right.”
rafe remains quiet, sitting on his bed, just listening to you talk.
“i just… i never liked it here, and i end up projecting that onto others, and i did that to you. i’m sorry.”
in theory, hearing you apologize should be gratifying, but rafe can’t identify any sign of regret in you. it’s not that he doesn’t think your apology is insincere, it’s that the regret he wanted to see doesn’t exist. you don’t regret leaving kildare nor leaving him.
“apology accepted.”
“thank you.” you smile.
“y/n, are you happy?” he asks.
“hm?”
“are you happy there?”
your smile and small nod tells everything he didn’t want to know. you are happy. in fact, you’re happier than ever.
“i am.”
rafe has vivid memories with you, and your smile has never been so wide, your eyes have never been so bright. maybe this will take him to hell, but he hates that you’re genuinely happy away from there, especially because he isn’t happy. and if he is not happy in where he feels he belongs most, there is no place in the world that makes him happy. 
maybe happiness isn’t an option for him, and the most upsetting thing about this is that money really can’t buy happiness. not the one rafe really needs anyways.
you want to tell rafe how you’re enjoying life for the first time, how being independent is amazing, but also sucks, but it’s still amazing, how the feeling of achieving something on merit is indescribable... but rafe would never understand.
it’s funny how two people who are so similar at first are so different in the end.
“that’s all that matters to me, then.”
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i love feedback! let me know your thoughts! <3
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withwritersblock · 6 months ago
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Little Freak
~Little Freak by Harry Styles~
Author's Note: requested! I looked up interpertations of the meaning behind the song and picked my favorite :) Summary: Luke recalls his favorite situationship from college Warnings: mentions of sex ig? Word Count: 2,282 Luke Hughes x fm!reader
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The season was starting to get harder and harder. The media was dragging him through the dirt because he wasn’t perfect. He made mistakes and he wasn’t allowed to do that. Even though he was a rookie. It was April, the Devils season coming to an end without a playoff appearance, all Luke wanted was to go home. Yet they had three games left. 
It was well past midnight and his mind was wandering. His hotel bed was uncomfortable, despite being one of the nicer ones in Toronto. He kept tossing and turning.
Shutting his eyes, Y/N popped into his mind. 
He agreed to the costume before he remembered how hot the fraternity parties got. How crowded and instantly sweaty he got. The Scooby-Doo costume was slowly started to be zipped lower and lower on his frame as more alcohol entered his body. He mostly stuck to his friends, the other boys in Scooby-Doo costumes. Many have already resorted to letting it hang off of their waist.
Luke was avoiding being shirtless at the party as long as he could.  He kept his beer can in his hand longer than he should’ve this late into the night. It was becoming warm and nearly undrinkable. He still kept it in his hand as he leaned against the wall ignoring something Dylan was shouting towards the rest of the group. 
He lifted his gaze to see a group of girls entering the party, all of them were wearing short dresses with white boots. He couldn’t tell what they were exactly until they spun around to see tiny wings on their back. Their costume came into his mind but it quickly drifted away as the girl in the green dress struck out. She was dead center of the group, quickly left alone as each girl ran towards another person they recognized.
She stood still scanning the crowded party before she started walking deeper into the crowd. Luke lost sight of her, he clenched his jaw as he slowly dropped his gaze towards his beer in his hand. 
���LUKEY BOY!” Ethan shouted as he slammed his and onto Luke’s shoulder. Luke lifted his head, a little delayed in the action. “DID YOU JUST FALL IN LOVE!?” he shouted again teasingly. Luke smirked as he rolled his eyes. He brought the beer towards his mouth, sipping barely any of the liquid. 
“Shut up, man,” he let out while shaking his head. “I need a new beer!” he shouted towards Ethan, implying he should come with. He nodded as the pair, shoved through the crowd towards the less full kitchen. 
The girl in the green dress stood beside one of the girls she came into the party with. Ethan smiled towards Luke as they both reached into the cooler beside the girls. 
“Lemme guess!” Ethan shouted excitedly towards the girls. They stopped their conversation, looking towards Ethan expectantly, “Tinkerbell and Silvermist!” he said pointing towards each of the girls. They smirked as they nodded. 
“How’d you know that, Scooby?” the girl in the light blue dress asked. Ethan nodded confidently as he ran his fingers through his hair. 
Luke tuned out the conversation as he tossed his old beer towards the nearly overflowing trash can in the corner of the kitchen. He quickly opened the tab to his beer in his hand and the liquid sprayed out for a second. It completely hit the girl in the light blue dress. 
His eyes widened as his mouth fell open. She gasped dramatically, turning to Luke and giving him a glare. “I’m so sorry about him, let’s get you cleaned up!” Ethan said as he delicately took a hold of her arm. The girl huffed as she allowed Ethan to guide her away. Luke pressed his lips together trying not to laugh.
The girl in the green dress looked towards Luke and let out a sudden laugh. Luke started laughing as he took the spot of the girl in the light blue dress. 
He leaned towards her, talking close to her ear, “I promise that wasn’t planned to talk to you guys.” He pulled away, a soft smirk on his lips. 
“I didn’t think it was but now I’m starting to think it might’ve been,” she teased. He chuckled as he brought the beer towards his lips. He took a sip, unzipping more of the costume as he fanned himself with his other hand for a moment. “I’m sorry about Zoey! She’s a bit dramatic,” she offered.
“I mean I did get some beer on her,” Luke shrugged.
“Yeah, but it barely touched her skin,” she said laughing. “This whole fairy costume stuff was her idea, so I’m sure she’s so crushed a little bit of beer got on her,” she said sarcastically.
“Says the girl who’s dressed as the main character,” 
“I’m only Tinkerbell because I look good in green,” she offered as she looked into his eyes. He slowly scanned her frame, admiring the color against her skin. His cheeks slowly pinked up.
“Yeah, you do,” he mumbled. She smirked as she delicately rested her hand onto his arm.
“It was nice meeting you-” she trailed off.
“Luke,” he answered for her, suddenly feeling shy. 
“It was nice meeting you, Luke. I’m gonna go find my friends,” she uttered as she turned away from him. 
“Wait-!” he called after her and she spun around and faced him again. “What’s your name?” he asked. She smiled towards him as she tilted her head to the side.
“Y/N!” she told him before she slowly started walking away from him. She spotted a few of her friends huddled in the corner and she approached them. They smiled wide as she approached.
“Where’s Zoey?” her friend, Brit, asked. Y/N smirked.
“Some guy spilled beer on her and then the other guy offered to get her cleaned up,” she explained. The girls all started laughing.
“So she’s probably-”
“Yup,” Y/N offered as she glanced towards the kitchen once more. She wasn’t sure if she was searching for Luke but if she was, she didn’t find him.
It was another hour into the party and it was only getting more and more crowded. Her friends were drunk and busy dancing but she was burnt out. She wandered towards the kitchen, the only space where she could get some air. Her face scrunched together as she shoved passed a couple grinding against each other. She let out a huff of air as she stepped into the free space.
Her eyes landed on Luke who was also leaning against a countertop, drinking a water bottle. He smirked as he met her gaze. “You alright?” he asked as he took a long sip from his bottle. She nodded as she took a deep breath.
“I just need a break from all of that,” she expressed.
He nodded. “Me too,” he muttered. He tilted his head back against the cabinet, meeting her gaze through his eyelashes. He pressed his lips together as he scanned her frame. “Do you wanna escape to my room?” he asked.
She hesitated for only a second before she nodded. He held out his free hand towards her and she gladly took it. She followed after him towards the room that had a lock on the handle from the outside. Luke quickly took the lock off before he shvoed the door open.
The room was surprisingly more clean than she expected. The rest of the house was disgusting, so she was shocked to see it look the way it did. He delicately guided her inside, locking the door behind them. He let go off her hand as he awkwardly held his hands out as if to show her the room. 
“We can just chill and watch a movie or something-you know wait for the crowd to die down,” he offered as he pointed to the bed beside him.  She nodded as she watched him hop onto the bed at the same time he turned on his TV. A soft giggle fell from her lips as she slowly laid beside him. 
Luke opened his eyes, trying to send the memory far away. He hasn’t thought about her in months. He’s been in situations similar with girls but Y/N suddenly was on his mind. He reached for his phone and turned it on. He pulled up his Snapchat memories and began scrolling. 
He kept scrolling until he reached the months that he was with Y/N. He kept glancing at the photos and videos, hoping to see some evidence of their time together. Perhaps to refresh his memory. His eyes land on the photo of him and Y/N laying in his bed together a few months after they met. He smiled to himself as he admired the way she looked in the photo.
She looked tired but happy.
“What are you doing?” she asked as she shoved his arms away with his phone held up. He chuckled as he dropped his phone down to the side. He crossed his arms over his chest. She brushed her fingers through her hair as she stared down towards Luke laying beside him. 
“Just remembering this,” he muttered as he scanned her features. She rolled her eyes as she leaned towards him. Delicately pressing her lips against his. He raised his hands up and delicately ran his hands along her back slowly and cautiously.
She pulled away as she looked into his eyes for a moment before she laid beside him instead. “Am I sneaking out, or did you tell your roommates?” she asked as she stared towards her hands. He pressed his lips together as he took a deep breath. “Sneaking out, got it,” she muttered. 
“Y/N,” he let out.
“No it’s okay,” she mumbled as she slowly stood up from the bed, she crossed her arms over her chest. She wandered around the bed towards the black hoodie she wore. 
“I just don’t know what to tell them,” Luke said. She clenched her jaw as she covered her frame. She nodded as she slipped on her shoes as well. “Y/N,” he mumbled.
“I’ll see you next party, I guess,” she mumbled as she snuck out of his room, glancing down the hall. Luke tilted his head back against the pillow as he shut his eyes harshly.
“Stupid,” he muttered as he ran his hand across his eyes.
Luke frowned to himself as he continued to look for memories with her. He saw a few more photos of her in a similar light several weeks later. It was the last one between the pair. 
His memory quickly returned, he rolled his eyes as he recalled how he ruined it.
He was on top of her, her thigh in his hand as he kissed her urgently. Her fingertips ran through his curls. He pulled away admiring her features as he began to trail his lips from her jaw down to her neck. She hummed as she began to breath heavier. He pulled away, leaning back as he pulled his shirt from his frame. She smiled as he leaned down towards her again, kissing her urgently.
“Luke,” she mumbled against his lips, he hummed as he kissed her urgently. His hands began to roam her frame and she pulled away, “Luke,” she let out again. He stopped and stared into her eyes.
“You alright?” he asked as he scanned her features. She took a shaky breath as she ran her fingers through his hair for a quiet moment. 
“What are we doing?” she asked quietly. His gaze lowered towards her lips. 
“Having fun,” he let out casually. She rolled her eyes. She slowly slipped her hands from his hair, down his chest towards her own body. 
“Yeah? That’s it? All we’re doing?” she let out frustratingly. He furrowed his eyebrows as he rolled away from her. He sat up at the same time she did. 
“What’s wrong with that?” he asked shyly. She rolled her eyes, a laugh leaving her lips as she stood up from the bed. “Where are you going?” he continued. 
“I’m tired of this, Luke, I’m gonna go. Find another girl to have fun with because I’m tired of sneaking around. I want a relationship but I don’t want it with someone who has to hide the fact that we have sex from his friends,” she let out as she put on her outfit she had on prior. 
Without giving him a second to think about what she said she opens the bedroom door and reenters the party. Luke let out a long drawn out breath as he collapsed onto his back. 
He found himself pulling up her contact. He hasn’t tried to reach her since that night well over a year ago. He never saw her as a girl he wanted a relationship with, but he hates that he hurt her. 
He pulled the phone towards his ear, hearing it ring. A sigh of relief fell from his lips hearing that she didn’t block him. 
After a few seconds the ringing stops but it wasn’t sent to voicemail. She answered. “Uh-hello?” she let out awkwardly. 
“H-hey, I was just thinking about you and I guess I called you,” he let out shyly. He wasn’t sure how to explain it, it was so fast. He truly doesn’t remember hitting the call button.
“Oh-okay, you doing alright, Luke?” she offered. He didn’t know how to answer.
“Ye-yeah, sure. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have called,”
“You shouldn’t have,” she mumbled while giggling, “But you did, what’s going on?” she asked again.
“I guess I just miss being a dumbass college kid,”
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zegrasdrysdale · 10 months ago
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matthew knies smut — losing ur v card to him
[ helping hand ] m. knies
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paring : Matthew Knies x fem!reader
summary : Matthew helps his best friend out after she asks him to take her virginity
warning(s) : smut ! loss of virginity, virgin!reader, light dirty talk, slight hair pulling (blink and you'll miss it tbh) oral (f receiving), fingering, p in v, protected sex, use of pet names during sex (pretty girl, baby, etc.), multiple orgasms
author’s note : felt like writing something cute so i decided to tackle this request and make it as cute as i could. this is my first time writing for kniesy so if it’s bad then pls tell me lol
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Being a 20-year-old virgin sucks. Every time she tries to hook up with a guy, she blurts out that she’s “never done this before” and it scares him away. Needless to say, she is getting very tired of being a virgin. She's loves sex, but she's never gone all the way with a guy.
Tonight was just another reminder that she's never been fucked. She thought that after her date, he'd take her back to his apartment and she'd finally lose her virginity. Then he said that his mom was going to be home soon just as things started getting heated, right after she had said that she's never gone all the way.
It's a tiring pattern.
She's frustrated, and frustration means stomping up to her longtime best friend's Toronto apartment a little before eleven. She pounds her fist on Matthew's door then waits. There are light footsteps behind the door before it's pulled open.
Matthew looks like he just woke up, and she feels bad. His Toronto hockey shirt is a little wrinkled and he's wearing sweats. His hair is a complete disaster. "Did I wake you?" she questions.
He yawns, but shakes his head no. "I was just closing my eyes," he tells her. "I thought you were out on a date or something. Why are you here?"
"You'll never guess what happened," she sighs as she walks past him into his apartment. "I did it again."
Matthew laughs and shuts the door behind her. "You need to stop," he comments. "You're never going to lose it if you keep telling guys that you haven't gone all the way. You're twenty."
"I know!" she groans as she plops down onto his couch. "It's like a get scared or something and it just comes out. I wish I could just get it over with and then it won't come out."
He sits beside her and she looks up at him. "Don't rush it," he tells her. "It's not all that anyway. Just wait until you find someone you trust and genuinely like."
A light bulb flicks on in her head. She sits up and turns her body to face Matthew. "Will you?"
"Will I what?"
"Sleep with me so I'm not a virgin anymore," she finishes. He raises his eyebrows and looks like he's about to object. "I mean, I trust you with everything I have. You're my best friend. You're not bad looking. I've known you for years, Matthew. I'd be okay if you did this for me. It wouldn't change anything with us."
Matthew thinks about it. She knows by the way he sighs and runs his fingers through his messy hair. "You're sure about this?" he questions. "Because I don't want to do this then-"
She rolls his eyes in frustration and cups his jaw. She pulls him into a kiss, and it surprises her when she feels her heart beat out of her chest when her lips meet his. Even Matthew is thrown off by the kiss. He immediately pulls back. She drops her hands to her lap.
"I'm not going to regret it, Matt," she tells him as her eyes meet his. Have his eyes always been this pretty and blue? She's never been this close to see how blue they are. "I promise. It might bring us closer as friends if we do this. I'm not going to stop being your friend because you slept with me."
He still doesn't seem very convinced. "This is going to change us," he tells her. "No matter what. I just want both of us to be ready for that."
With a nod, her eyes flicker down to his lips for a second before returning to his eyes. "I know," she replies. "Just ... please. I'll never ask you for anything ever again if you do this for me."
Matthew searches her face for any signs that she doesn't want this. He won't find any. If she's going to lose her virginity to anyone, she wouldn't mind losing it to her best friend. She wants this.
He doesn't say "okay" or anything like that. All he does is grab her chin between his thumb and pointer finger. "If this is what you really want then I'll do it," he says to her, voice slightly higher than a whisper.
"I really want this," she confirms. "Seriously."
His eyes drop to her lips before he leans in and gently presses his lips to hers, and her eyes flutter shut. Her heart beats out of her chest with how soft and gently he kisses her.
The kisses don't immediately turn heated and needy. Matthew makes sure of that. When they do though, she climbs onto his lap in the red minidress that she's wearing. She straddles his thighs and wraps her arms loosely around his neck. Matthew's hands drop to the bare skin on her thighs.
Her heels clatter to the carpeted floor beneath them with a thud. Her fingers find a home and curl in his locks. She tugs gently and a soft noise comes from Matthew. She smiles into the kiss that follows and tucks this piece of information away for later.
She traps his bottom lip between her teeth and pulls back. She watches it snap back into place. Matthew looks up at her and she sees that his eyes have darkened a bit. There's a dark fire between them and she can tell he's trying to hold himself back.
"Pretend it's not me," she tells him as her hands drag down his neck and chest until they come to a rest on his torso. She play with the hem of his t-shirt. "I can tell, Matt. You're holding back because it's me."
Matthew shakes his head. "I'm holding back because I want to do this right," he replies. "It's not because it's you. I want to make sure that it's perfect for you."
"Then don't hold back," she whispers to him as she attaches her lips to his jaw right under his ear. "It'll be perfect no matter what."
A shaky sigh passes Matthew's kiss-bruised lips. He kisses the swell of her ear and she keeps working at his jaw.
Before she realizes what's happening, Matthew slides his hands to the back of her thighs and stands up. She wraps her legs around his waist and her arms around his neck. "It's insane how easily you were able to just pick me up like that," she comments.
"I work out everyday," Matthew replies as he makes his way down the hallway to his bedroom. "Sometimes twice a day. I lay hits on grown men that weigh as much as I do or heavier for a living. I hope that I can lift someone up that is nearly a foot shorter than me and weighs less than what I bench."
She can't contain the giggle that rises in her throat as he crosses the threshold into his room. "That's kind of hot of you, Matt," she admits. "I mean, I don't know how you're single when you bench more than I weigh."
He kicks the door shut behind him and gently sets her down so she's flat on her feet. She sees the flush in his cheeks despite the dimly lit room. She smiles and gets on her tiptoes to instigate another kiss. Matthew has to lean down to kiss her because of the heigh difference between them. His hands rest on her cheeks and she rests against the door.
They stand there for what feels like an eternity. She's almost certain that the lace panties she has on under the dress are ruined. She hasn't be able to stop thinking about Matthew's fingers on her thighs while they were in the couch, not to mention the fact that he was able to pick her up with almost no effort.
Her fingers curl around the hem of his t-shirt and she pulls at it. "Off," she mumbles against his lips. "Matt, please. Off."
The kiss breaks and Matthew reaches down to pull the fabric over his head. Her eyes rake his body and it's very obvious that he works out every day. Her fingers trace his abs and she bites her bottom lip.
Okay, maybe he's more attractive than she's let herself admit. She's never really allowed herself to look at him like this. She's never let herself admire him like this.
Matthew hooks his fingers under the very thin straps that sit on her shoulders. She looks up at him and notices how focused he is on his actions. He pulls the straps off her shoulders and lets the dress fall so it pools at her ankles. She's in her strapless bra and matching panties. She notices Matthew's eyes drink her in.
She puts her hands on his chest and gently pushes him in the direction of his bed. She kicks the dress off so she can follow him. As soon as Matthew sits back on the bed, she crawls onto his lap. Her knees bracket his thighs. She leans in and ravishes his mouth with hers. One of his hands finds its way to her curls and he holds the back of her head so she can’t break the heated kiss.
Without realizing she does it, she rolls her hips against his. He hums and his other hand comes down on her bare waist.
A surge of confidence overcomes her and she reaches behind her. She unhooks her bra and lets the red lace fall between them. She tosses it somewhere at the same time Matthew breaks the kiss.
Her entire body shakes with nerves.
It’s just Matthew. They’ve been friends since his first year at Minnesota. Best friends since his sophomore year. She visited him earlier in the season and fell in love with Canada so she moved into an apartment down the street from him.
She can do this.
Matthew lifts her head up and says, “I’ve got you. Okay? I have you. Whatever you want.”
“I want you,” she tells him. “Please. I need you.”
He moves back on the bed and flips them over so he hovers over her. Her curls create a halo around her head. Matthew thumbs her swollen lips and trails it down over her chin, over her chest, between her breasts, and down her stomach until his fingers rest at the waistband of her panties. Goosebumps follow his fingers down her upper body.
She can feel the bulge in his pants so she bucks her hips up to grind her clothed core against the bulge. “Shit,” he gasps. “You can’t just do that.”
“Why not?”
“Because I’ll come before either of us are ready.”
She lets out a light laugh. “We wouldn’t want that, now would we?” she teases.
“Shut up,” he mumbles before shutting her up himself with a deep kiss. She smiles and hooks her fingers into the waistband of his sweatpants.
She pushes his sweatpants down and over his ass. He helps her out and kicks them off.
When she tries to put her hand in his boxers, Matthew stops her. He breaks the kiss and shakes his head. “If we’re doing this, we’re doing it right. I’m going to make sure you feel good and make sure you’re comfortable, okay?” he says to her.
“Okay,” she replies, voice barely above a whisper.
With her permission, Matthew hooks his fingers in the waistband of her panties and slowly pulls the thin fabric off her body. He tosses them to the floor and she lets her knees fall open.
Matthew attaches his lips to her jaw, then slowly trails his lips down her body. He makes a quick stop when he gets to her breasts. He gives each one a little attention and she lets out a soft noise. She bites her lip to keep from making any embarrassing noises.
He lies on his stomach and throws her legs over his broad shoulders. She watches as he presses soft kisses to her leg trailing from her inner knee and up her inner thigh. He stops right before he gets to her core.
“Already so wet for me,” he comments. She nods and grabs a pillow to rest her head on so she doesn’t get a crick in her neck.
That’s when Matthew slides a finger through her soaked folds. A whine passes her lips and she looks down at him with her eyes. He teases her entrance and she gasps, “I- Matthew. Don’t tease please. Do something.”
“Didn’t think you were a begger, pretty girl,” he replies. She shoots him a glare and he laughs.
She’s about to say something to him when he wraps his lips around her clit. “Oh my- fuck” is what comes out of her mouth instead. Matthew hums and sends vibrations through her entire body. He slowly pushes a finger into her and her back arches off the bed.
Matthew’s free hand slides up her body and cups one of her tits. She didn’t pick Matthew to be a boob guy, but today is full of surprises.
Soft pants pass her lips as Matthew keeps using his mouth and fingers to bring her closer to an orgasm. He adds a second finger and her hands fly to his hair. Her breathing has gotten extremely labored and soft noises consistently pass her lips.
He’s so careful with his movements, so precise. He knows what he’s doing, and she’s not at all surprised that he does. She didn’t realize just how much he knew. Despite never actually hooking up before, it’s like he knows her entire body and what she likes.
Once a third finger is inside of her, Matthew curls his fingers in a “come here” motion. She gasps and a knot forms in the pit of her stomach. “Matt,” she groans. “I- Matthew.”
“Let me hear you,” he tells her. “Wanna hear you when you come on my fingers. Can you do do that for me?”
She nods and hums. “Yeah,” she breathes out.
“Go ahead, pretty girl,” Matthew says. “Come for me. I can feel how close you are.”
His lips are back on her clit and she’s coming seconds later.
Her back arches off the mattress as her walls clench around his fingers. Her body turns into jelly as he fingers her through what’s probably the strongest orgasm she’s ever had. She swears she blacks out.
Her breathing is extremely labored as Matthew withdraws his fingers. She whimpers at the loss and watches him crawl up her body when her vision comes back. He smiles when he sees how out of it she probably looks.
Matthew peppers her cheek with soft kisses as she comes to.
“You okay?” he asks. “Can you do one more?”
“Mhm,” she hums. “Want you inside me, Matt. Please. I need you.”
He captures her lips in a soft kiss and she groans when she tastes herself on his lips.
It’s a very quick kiss. Matthew reaches over into his bedside drawer and pulls out a tiny foil package. He puts it between his teeth as he pushes his boxers off his body. She bites her lip as Matthew’s dick pops out of the confines of the boxers.
She accidentally saw his dick one time before now, and it looked nothing like it does right now. “Jesus, Matt,” she gasps. “Is it gonna fit?”
Matthew laughs and slides the condom onto his dick. “I promise it’ll fit,” he tells her.
He hover over her between her legs. The tip of his dick lines up with her entrance and she shakes. Her heart races in her chest and she stares up at the pretty boy above her. “Slow,” she tells him. “Okay? I don’t know-”
“Tell me if you need me to stop or if it hurts,” he interrupts. “I’ll move at your pace, okay? I have you.”
She nods. “Go.”
Matthew slowly pushes into her. She gasps as the unfamiliar stretch and grasps onto his biceps. The deeper he goes, the more it hurts. She pushes through though and pain eventually turns into pleasure.
He moves so slow though that it’s almost painful. She wants him to ruin her but she wants to be able to walk in the morning. Whatever that will look like.
She reaches up and slides her hair into Matthew’s hair. His eyes lock with her as he bottoms out in her. Her lips are pressed in a line. “Okay?” he asks.
With a nod, she says, “I’m okay. Give me a second. You’re fucking big, Matt. Damn.”
He laughs. “That’s not my fault,” he replies. “Most women I hook up with like it.”
“I didn’t say I didn’t like it, asshole,” she retorts. “I said I needed a second.”
Matthew laughs again and she pulls him down into a kiss to shut him up. He licks into her mouth and she groans.
Feeling ready, she rolls her hips. One of Matthew’s hands rests on her waist and he meets her movements.
It’s slow, but it feels good. He slowly but deeply thrusts into her. She moans into Matthew’s mouth and he swallows every noise. Her hands slide from his hair to his back. She gently digs her nails into his skin.
He speeds his movements up a bit and she throws her head back against the pillows. “Fuck,” she gasps. “God. Matt.”
“Okay, baby?” he asks. “Good to keep going?”
She nods. “Like you mean it,” she pants. Matthew’s smile reaches his ears.
Matthew throws one of her legs over his shoulder and is able to move deeper into her at the new angle. She cries out his name and he attaches his lips to her neck. He’s covering her entire body at this point. It’s not only his dick that’s big. Matthew himself is a bigger guy.
He slows his movements but continues to bury his cock in her. The knot forms again in the pit of her stomach.
“Matt, I-”
“Me too,” he interrupts. “This is about you. I’m not gonna come until you come on my cock, pretty girl.”
She feels tears in her eyes as she tries to keep herself from coming. It feels too good and she doesn’t want it to end yet.
Especially since this is probably the first and last time she gets this from Matthew. She wants it to last.
Matthew slides a hand between them and as soon as his fingers find her clit again, she comes.
His name is on her lips as he fucks her through what is definitely the strongest orgasm of her life. Her entire body shudders as she comes. Her vision goes white for a hot second and she completely melts against the mattress beneath her. Her legs fall to the bed.
He comes into the condom before he pulls out of her. They’re both panting messes as he ties off the condom and throws it out. She very lazily crawls under the covers and Matthew joins her.
There’s a comfortable silence between them as they both recover from their highs. She finally gains feeling back in all her extremities and looks over at him.
“Thank you,” she weakly says.
“For?”
“Doing that for me. It was fun. I enjoyed it.”
Matthew sits up in bed and leans back against the headboard just as she went to curl up next to him. “I should’ve said something before we did that,” he admits to her.
She sits up and holds the blankets under her arms to keep herself covered. “What?”
He bites his kiss-bruised bottom lip for a second. “I have feelings for you,” he confesses. “Genuine feelings for you and I feel guilty for saying yes before telling you that.”
A day full of surprises.
She’d be lying if she said she didn’t feel the same. There is a reason she asked him of all her friends to do this for her. She’s always known he was attractive, a genuine guy and an incredible hockey player.
She’s damn lucky that Matthew agreed to have sex with her.
Matthew looks terrified. She smiles and drops her head to his shoulder. “You should see the look on your face,” she laughs.
“I’m being serious,” he tells her.
“I know,” she replies. Her chin rests on his shoulder. “I like you too. Why do you think I asked you to do this and not someone else?”
He blinks. “I thought you were just tired of being a twenty year old virgin,” he flatly states.
“There was that but I wanted it to be you,” she admits. “I guess I was just shooting my shot.”
“You’re ridiculous,” Matthew laughs.
She crawls onto his lap and lays on him. “When do I get one of those cool jackets the wives and girlfriends have?”
“You want one?”
“I do,” she tells him as she looks up at him. “Is that okay? If I got one?”
Matthew smiles and nods. “I’ll get you one.”
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