#Essex is just laughing from the grave

[reireichu]

We’ll forever have the scars.

Part III: the dead wife.

“There’s this rumour that the Russian prince who had the house previously never wanted to risk the last of the existing Romanov jewels to be found by anyone else. So, he sunk it to the bottom of the lake, tied to the body of his second wife.”

He pictures Viserys weighing Alicent down with all of Aemma’s jewels. He sees Viserys and Daemon throwing her into the lake and she slowly sinks down.

This chapter should be summarised as “AEGON GET YOUR ASS TO THERAPY” with side notes of “Alicent’s shitty marriage makes me want to get violent” with the commentary of “Aegon really be there going on a date with a girl he hates because she’s his Alicent 2.0”

Find the madness here on AO3.

[insanityclause]

SPOILER ALERT: This article contains details of the first five episodes of Disney+’s Loki, & maybe the finale. Maybe.

EXCLUSIVE: “I have learned, at this point, having said goodbye to the character more than twice, two and a half times maybe, to make no assumptions,” says Loki’s Tom Hiddleston as the hours tick away to the finale of the Disney+ series drops early on Wednesday morning. “We’ll see where the ride goes now,” the Marvel alum adds.

As always with almost any project from the Kevin Feige run studio, that ride could continue, at least in some form or another. Certainly, the June 9 ‘Glorious Purpose’ premiere of the Michael Waldron penned and Kate Herron directed Loki proved to be the Disney+ and the MCU’s biggest small screen success so far. Also with any Marvel project, past Emmy winner Hiddleston was elusive on what could be coming next, be it in the Loki finale, another season or another appearance in the movies as the MCU shifts into its next phrase.

One thing is clear, after a decade playing the God of Mischief, Hiddleston still has a lot of Loki on the brain, in the best way.Leading towards the finale, I chatted with a UK-based Hiddleston about returning to play Loki and the search for who or what controls the seemingly all knowing, all powerful Time Variance Authority. The Night Manager star also spoke about filming during the coronavirus pandemic, working with Owen Wilson, Gugu Mbatha-Raw, Wunmi Mosaku, Richard E. Grant, and Sophia Di Martino, who portrays variant and soulmate Sylvie, and his upcoming AppleTV+ series The Essex Serpent with Claire Danes.

DEADLINE: There’s a great line in this season’s penultimate episode where your Loki and Sylvie are stunned at watch Richard E. Grant’s Classic Loki recreate Asgard to distract Alioth and you say “I think we’re stronger than we realize.” There seems to be a great resonance in the line that there’s a whole lot of Loki coming in the finale and probably more …

HIDDLESTON: I suppose it resonates with the theme that we all wanted to highlight about purpose and about meaning. Loki’s someone who’s probably been deluded by the idea that he’s burdened with glorious purpose, and that perhaps that purpose has been revealed to be fraudulent or meaningless, and maybe his self-image or the role that he has condemned himself to play is redundant.

His experiences through this story have shown him that there are actually more opportunities available to him, and you know, it speaks to this idea, like, can we change? Can we evolve, and in that evolution, is there room to grow? You know, so, I think the stronger than we realize I think is Loki finally understanding that, really, by caring for other people, that maybe there’s power in that, and I found that very touching, and the whole thing is an extraordinary dream.

DEADLINE: Speaking of an extraordinary dream, you have been playing Loki for a decade now, since the first Thor movie, We know you are going to do some voice work in the animated What If…? series, but how has it been having this series directly centering on him, in all his variants, so to speak?

HIDDLESTON: You know Dominic, I have enjoyed it so much, because I felt it was a gift and a privilege to be invited to come and sit at the table and think about what the show might be. Also, I suppose so many of the things that I’ve discovered about Loki as a character in the comics and a character in the Norse myths, in the canon, aspects that I’ve always thought were interesting, and understandably, there hasn’t been time or space in the movies to explore them.

DEADLINE: In terms of who he is?

HIDDLESTON: Those aspects of him have been externalized and embedded into this new story about identity itself and about integrating the disparate fragment of the many selves that he is or perhaps the many selves that we are. You know, we contain multitudes. Loki certainly contains multitudes. We have met many of those multitudes, including Alligator Loki (laughs).

DEADLINE: Sounds like you’re not done with those multitudes yet. From your POV, from conversations with Kevin (Feige) is there more that you see for the character as the MCU heads into its next stages?

HIDDLESTON: Well, I certainly don’t have Kevin’s brain or encyclopedic knowledge or capacity for invention. I’ve been on the ride for a while, and it’s been the most extraordinary journey, and to have lived through different iterations, different phases of the MCU, and I’m so grateful that I’m still here, and it’s been amazing to watch. I feel that the MCU is even more expansive, is even braver, more inclusive than it’s ever been.

DEADLINE: How so?

HIDDLESTON: I think the stories are getting really exciting. Not that they weren’t before, but I think they understand that the investment of the audience is very deep, and they don’t take it for granted for a second. So, yeah, I suppose the perspective I have on how Loki might affect the ongoing course of the MCU is this idea of the multiverse. People have already understood it when Miss Minutes is introducing Loki to the TVA. She talks about the multiverse and the war and that the sacred timeline, which is reality as we know it.

DEADLINE: It opens up the aperture certainly for new stories from all opportunities, doesn’t it?

HIDDLESTON: It raises questions of, well, maybe there are other parallel or alternate universes. Maybe there are other realities, and the possibilities there are endless. I feel that at the end of episode five, Loki and Sylvie are close to discovering the answers to the questions that they have of who is behind the TVA and that, somehow, this will provoke even more curiosity about…

DEADLINE: …Because in the Marvel Universe, answering one set of questions always leads to another set of questions, in many ways.

HIDDLESTON: Right. Yeah. Yeah, and I know that there are lots of, you know, interesting titles of movies that’ve been announced, which kind of hint at where it might be going.

DEADLINE: One of those that hasn’t been officially announced, but is rumored is a Season 2 for Loki, in gear under the temporary title of Architect on call sheets and the like …

HIDDLESTON: Well, yes, maybe, as I say, all the kind of multiple alternate realities are …it’s taken me 10 years to get a handle on this sort of mono timeline. The idea that this might be a multiverse is actually beyond my knowledge of physics.

DEADLINE: Well, I doubt that, but let me ask, and no spoilers for the finale or further, but if Kevin, Marvel, Disney asked you to do more Loki, are you game?

HIDDLESTON: (laughs) I have learned, at this point, having said goodbye to the character more than twice, two and a half times maybe, to make no assumptions. So, I’m also aware that I’m only playing him because of the audience, really. So, it’s not up to me. But I do love playing him, and every time, I seem to find new, interesting things about him. So, yeah, I’m a temporary passenger on Loki’s journey, but we’ll see. We’ll see where the ride goes now.

DEADLINE: On the ride, as the finale looms, there’s a ton of fan speculation out there and so much that people have hooked on to from the show. So, as the man at the center of it, what was your favorite part of Loki the series?

HIDDLESTON: That there was meaning in the making of it.That we crossed the finish line in the middle of a global pandemic and could create something, and more than ever, I felt really grateful for being able to do this job. I think in this there are some of those questions that we were all asking ourselves in the last 18 months in the show, you know, what do our lives mean?📷I love taking Loki in new directions. I love the contributions of my fellow actors, of Owen Wilson and Sophia Di Martino and Richard E. Grant and Gugu Mbatha-Raw, and Wunmi Masaku, they all brought so much to the table, and I’ll always remember that. You know, I’ll always remember just being in Atlanta with all of them and making our bonkers show. Yeah.

DEADLINE: Making your bonkers show in Atlanta as the world, as America was still in the heat of the pandemic. What was that like, because you were in production and then everything stopped and then you came back, right?

HIDDLESTON: I mean, people have used this word a lot, but it really was unprecedented. I think we did six weeks of filming before the hiatus, and then the production was suspended for four or five months, and we came back. At first, it was unfamiliar because we had to make adjustments, but the thing I remember most of all, quite honestly, is the diligence and resilience and spirit of our cast and crew.

DEADLINE: Really?

HIDDLESTON: Yes, and it remains extremely special for me, this project, for that reason.For me, it just demonstrated the character of these amazing people. It took a huge amount of planning and care and looking after each other. By that, I mean, being in the bubble. So, for many of us, the only other human beings we saw, really, were each other. So, we came to work, and we became a team, and the circumstances fostered this extraordinary team spirit, and so the memory of making it is really my incredible and deep respect and affection for my fellow filmmakers. People like Trish Stanard, our line producer. Richard Graves, our first AD. Kristina Peterson, our second AD. Autumn Durald, DP. Kevin Wright, our supervising producer, and so many others making sure everyone could stay safe and look after each other.It’s really…I find it…it’s very moving, and it’s remarkable, and I just want to salute them all because I couldn’t have done any of it without them.

DEADLINE: In that vein, you have just come off filming The Essex Serpent with Claire Danes for AppleTV+. Very different from Loki, and yet also a tale of what is real and who we are. Is that what attracted you to it on some level?

HIDDLESTON: I read it and immediately connected to it. Read the screenplay, the adaptation. It’s based on a novel by Sarah Perry, which was published in 2016 and is set at the end of the 19th century. It’s an extraordinary story about uncertainty and about our deepest fears and how sometimes our fears can distort our imaginings and how our minds can lie to us. About how we have to guard against that, and Perry sets it in this extraordinary time with a beautiful leading character of Cora Seaborne, played by Claire. Anna Symon adopted it.

There’s this community on the east coast of England who believe that an ancient beast has been awakened by an earthquake and that it’s dislodged all these fossils. But perhaps, it has also dislodged this ancient underwater monster, which has been used to explain certain unusual phenomena. This was in the era when Darwin had just been published a few decades before and people are starting to think, this Charles Darwin, he’s onto something. Still, fear spreads very quickly, and it’s a very fascinating time where science and faith are in conflict.

DEADLINE: When you describe it like that it sounds very Loki indeed.

HIDDLESTON: Maybe the themes are very Loki. Maybe that’s where they join up, but I’m playing a 19th century vicar who is trying to contain his community. You feel very destabilized by all these rumors. So, yeah, to go from Loki to a vicar was definitely new, a new territory.

DEADLINE: Literally and figuratively?

HIDDLESTON: Well, it’s my first significant time in Essex, where we filmed, which I feel embarrassed about. I’ve been to Essex before, but I’ve never been to the very, very eastern, most eastern coast of Essex. It’s the Blackwater Estuary, which then feeds into the River Thames, and it’s a very ancient part of England. It’s so marshy, it’s where in Great Expectations, that’s where Pip meets Magwitch for the first time. It’s all foggy and muddy and marshy and quite atmospheric and a perfect place to set a story about of uncertainty and fear and gothic romance. Clio Barnard directed it, and working with her has been amazing.

DEADLINE: You know, it occurs to me that of all the main Marvel characters, Loki has been such a constant, yet so ethereal in so many ways too. Is it jarring for you to jump back into the role with all the uncertainty it brings?

HIDDLESTON: You know, I’ve always seen it as sort of an extraordinary and surprising constant in my life for a decade. But, I don’t take it for granted because I don’t often…you know, it may end. It has actually ended, and those endings have been conclusive. I really thought a couple of years ago, after I made Avengers: Infinity War, you know, we all know what happens in that scene, and I thought, that’s it.I thought it’s over, and I was really proud to have been part of it. I was grateful for my time, but I thought that, my work would go off in a different direction. So, the idea that I got to come back and have another go was a complete delight, it truly was.

[twh-news]

‘Loki’s Tom Hiddleston Teases Marvel Series Finale, What It All Means & Is There More Of The God Of Mischief To Come?

By Dominic Patten | Deadline

SPOILER ALERT: This article contains details of the first five episodes of Disney+’s Loki, & maybe the finale. Maybe.

EXCLUSIVE: “I have learned, at this point, having said goodbye to the character more than twice, two and a half times maybe, to make no assumptions,” says Loki’s Tom Hiddleston as the hours tick away to the finale of the Disney+ series drops early on Wednesday morning. “We’ll see where the ride goes now,” the Marvel alum adds. As always with almost any project from the Kevin Feige run studio, that ride could continue, at least in some form or another. Certainly, the June 9 ‘Glorious Purpose’ premiere of the Michael Waldron penned and Kate Herron directed Loki proved to be the Disney+ and the MCU’s biggest small screen success so far. Also with any Marvel project, past Emmy winner Hiddleston was elusive on what could be coming next, be it in the Loki finale, another season or another appearance in the movies as the MCU shifts into its next phrase.

One thing is clear, after a decade playing the God of Mischief, Hiddleston still has a lot of Loki on the brain, in the best way.

Leading towards the finale, I chatted with a UK-based Hiddleston about returning to play Loki and the search for who or what controls the seemingly all knowing, all powerful Time Variance Authority. The Night Manager star also spoke about filming during the coronavirus pandemic, working with Owen Wilson, Gugu Mbatha-Raw, Wunmi Mosaku, Richard E. Grant, and Sophia Di Martino, who portrays variant and soulmate Sylvie, and his upcoming AppleTV+ series The Essex Serpent with Claire Danes.

DEADLINE: There’s a great line in this season’s penultimate episode where your Loki and Sylvie are stunned at watch Richard E. Grant’s Classic Loki recreate Asgard to distract Alioth and you say “I think we’re stronger than we realize.” There seems to be a great resonance in the line that there’s a whole lot of Loki coming in the finale and probably more …

HIDDLESTON: I suppose it resonates with the theme that we all wanted to highlight about purpose and about meaning. Loki’s someone who’s probably been deluded by the idea that he’s burdened with glorious purpose, and that perhaps that purpose has been revealed to be fraudulent or meaningless, and maybe his self-image or the role that he has condemned himself to play is redundant.

His experiences through this story have shown him that there are actually more opportunities available to him, and you know, it speaks to this idea, like, can we change? Can we evolve, and in that evolution, is there room to grow? You know, so, I think the stronger than we realize I think is Loki finally understanding that, really, by caring for other people, that maybe there’s power in that, and I found that very touching, and the whole thing is an extraordinary dream.

DEADLINE: Speaking of an extraordinary dream, you have been playing Loki for a decade now, since the first Thor movie, We know you are going to do some voice work in the animated What If…? series, but how has it been having this series directly centering on him, in all his variants, so to speak?

HIDDLESTON: You know Dominic, I have enjoyed it so much, because I felt it was a gift and a privilege to be invited to come and sit at the table and think about what the show might be. Also, I suppose so many of the things that I’ve discovered about Loki as a character in the comics and a character in the Norse myths, in the canon, aspects that I’ve always thought were interesting, and understandably, there hasn’t been time or space in the movies to explore them.

DEADLINE: In terms of who he is?

HIDDLESTON: Those aspects of him have been externalized and embedded into this new story about identity itself and about integrating the disparate fragment of the many selves that he is or perhaps the many selves that we are. You know, we contain multitudes. Loki certainly contains multitudes. We have met many of those multitudes, including Alligator Loki (laughs).

DEADLINE: Sounds like you’re not done with those multitudes yet. From your POV, from conversations with Kevin (Feige) is there more that you see for the character as the MCU heads into its next stages?

HIDDLESTON: Well, I certainly don’t have Kevin’s brain or encyclopedic knowledge or capacity for invention. I’ve been on the ride for a while, and it’s been the most extraordinary journey, and to have lived through different iterations, different phases of the MCU, and I’m so grateful that I’m still here, and it’s been amazing to watch. I feel that the MCU is even more expansive, is even braver, more inclusive than it’s ever been.

DEADLINE: How so?

HIDDLESTON: I think the stories are getting really exciting. Not that they weren’t before, but I think they understand that the investment of the audience is very deep, and they don’t take it for granted for a second. So, yeah, I suppose the perspective I have on how Loki might affect the ongoing course of the MCU is this idea of the multiverse. People have already understood it when Miss Minutes is introducing Loki to the TVA. She talks about the multiverse and the war and that the sacred timeline, which is reality as we know it.

DEADLINE: It opens up the aperture certainly for new stories from all opportunities, doesn’t it?

HIDDLESTON: It raises questions of, well, maybe there are other parallel or alternate universes. Maybe there are other realities, and the possibilities there are endless. I feel that at the end of episode five, Loki and Sylvie are close to discovering the answers to the questions that they have of who is behind the TVA and that, somehow, this will provoke even more curiosity about…

DEADLINE: …Because in the Marvel Universe, answering one set of questions always leads to another set of questions, in many ways.

HIDDLESTON: Right. Yeah. Yeah, and I know that there are lots of, you know, interesting titles of movies that’ve been announced, which kind of hint at where it might be going.

DEADLINE: One of those that hasn’t been officially announced, but is rumored is a Season 2 for Loki, in gear under the temporary title of Architect on call sheets and the like …

HIDDLESTON: Well, yes, maybe, as I say, all the kind of multiple alternate realities are …it’s taken me 10 years to get a handle on this sort of mono timeline. The idea that this might be a multiverse is actually beyond my knowledge of physics

DEADLINE: Well, I doubt that, but let me ask, and no spoilers for the finale or further, but if Kevin, Marvel, Disney asked you to do more Loki, are you game?

HIDDLESTON: (laughs) I have learned, at this point, having said goodbye to the character more than twice, two and a half times maybe, to make no assumptions. So, I’m also aware that I’m only playing him because of the audience, really. So, it’s not up to me. But I do love playing him, and every time, I seem to find new, interesting things about him. So, yeah, I’m a temporary passenger on Loki’s journey, but we’ll see. We’ll see where the ride goes now.

DEADLINE: On the ride, as the finale looms, there’s a ton of fan speculation out there and so much that people have hooked on to from the show. So, as the man at the center of it, what was your favorite part of Loki the series?

HIDDLESTON: That there was meaning in the making of it.

That we crossed the finish line in the middle of a global pandemic and could create something, and more than ever, I felt really grateful for being able to do this job. I think in this there are some of those questions that we were all asking ourselves in the last 18 months in the show, you know, what do our lives mean?

I love taking Loki in new directions. I love the contributions of my fellow actors, of Owen Wilson and Sophia Di Martino and Richard E. Grant and Gugu Mbatha-Raw, and Wunmi Masaku, they all brought so much to the table, and I’ll always remember that. You know, I’ll always remember just being in Atlanta with all of them and making our bonkers show. Yeah.

DEADLINE: Making your bonkers show in Atlanta as the world, as America was still in the heat of the pandemic. What was that like, because you were in production and then everything stopped and then you came back, right?

HIDDLESTON: I mean, people have used this word a lot, but it really was unprecedented. I think we did six weeks of filming before the hiatus, and then the production was suspended for four or five months, and we came back. At first, it was unfamiliar because we had to make adjustments, but the thing I remember most of all, quite honestly, is the diligence and resilience and spirit of our cast and crew.

DEADLINE: Really?

HIDDLESTON: Yes, and it remains extremely special for me, this project, for that reason.

For me, it just demonstrated the character of these amazing people. It took a huge amount of planning and care and looking after each other. By that, I mean, being in the bubble. So, for many of us, the only other human beings we saw, really, were each other. So, we came to work, and we became a team, and the circumstances fostered this extraordinary team spirit, and so the memory of making it is really my incredible and deep respect and affection for my fellow filmmakers. People like Trish Stanard, our line producer. Richard Graves, our first AD. Kristina Peterson, our second AD. Autumn Durald, DP. Kevin Wright, our supervising producer, and so many others making sure everyone could stay safe and look after each other.

It’s really…I find it…it’s very moving, and it’s remarkable, and I just want to salute them all because I couldn’t have done any of it without them.

DEADLINE: In that vein, you have just come off filming The Essex Serpent with Claire Danes for AppleTV+. Very different from Loki, and yet also a tale of what is real and who we are. Is that what attracted you to it on some level?

HIDDLESTON: I read it and immediately connected to it. Read the screenplay, the adaptation. It’s based on a novel by Sarah Perry, which was published in 2016 and is set at the end of the 19th century. It’s an extraordinary story about uncertainty and about our deepest fears and how sometimes our fears can distort our imaginings and how our minds can lie to us. About how we have to guard against that, and Perry sets it in this extraordinary time with a beautiful leading character of Cora Seaborne, played by Claire. Anna Symon adopted it.

There’s this community on the east coast of England who believe that an ancient beast has been awakened by an earthquake and that it’s dislodged all these fossils. But perhaps, it has also dislodged this ancient underwater monster, which has been used to explain certain unusual phenomena. This was in the era when Darwin had just been published a few decades before and people are starting to think, this Charles Darwin, he’s onto something. Still, fear spreads very quickly, and it’s a very fascinating time where science and faith are in conflict.

DEADLINE: When you describe it like that it sounds very Loki indeed.

HIDDLESTON: Maybe the themes are very Loki. Maybe that’s where they join up, but I’m playing a 19th century vicar who is trying to contain his community. You feel very destabilized by all these rumors. So, yeah, to go from Loki to a vicar was definitely new, a new territory.

DEADLINE: Literally and figuratively?

HIDDLESTON: Well, it’s my first significant time in Essex, where we filmed, which I feel embarrassed about. I’ve been to Essex before, but I’ve never been to the very, very eastern, most eastern coast of Essex. It’s the Blackwater Estuary, which then feeds into the River Thames, and it’s a very ancient part of England. It’s so marshy, it’s where in Great Expectations, that’s where Pip meets Magwitch for the first time. It’s all foggy and muddy and marshy and quite atmospheric and a perfect place to set a story about of uncertainty and fear and gothic romance. Clio Barnard directed it, and working with her has been amazing.

DEADLINE: You know, it occurs to me that of all the main Marvel characters, Loki has been such a constant, yet so ethereal in so many ways too. Is it jarring for you to jump back into the role with all the uncertainty it brings?

HIDDLESTON: You know, I’ve always seen it as sort of an extraordinary and surprising constant in my life for a decade. But, I don’t take it for granted because I don’t often…you know, it may end. It has actually ended, and those endings have been conclusive. I really thought a couple of years ago, after I made Avengers: Infinity War, you know, we all know what happens in that scene, and I thought, that’s it.

I thought it’s over, and I was really proud to have been part of it. I was grateful for my time, but I thought that, my work would go off in a different direction. So, the idea that I got to come back and have another go was a complete delight, it truly was.

[meteor-writes]

Essex, England, 1853

‘Polite women don’t have the luxury of saying no.’

This was the second time in one evening she’d heard the expression and frankly, Elizabeth Monroe wasn’t about to hear it a third.

Listening to it once was her first mistake – that landed her in this position – where the words were bellowed by Scott as he shoved her into Mr Ellington’s carriage who was, quote, generous enough to offer an insensible woman shelter from this biting January cold when her coachman was so unhandsomely late. Elizabeth thought wearing a fur trimmed cloak was proof enough of her sensible intent. Perhaps not.

In any case, a polite woman wouldn’t refuse. Thus, brought her to an uncomfortable carriage ride with a slimy man whose cigar-soaked breath drew too close as he told her in no simple terms that her pretty face would look good on his mantelpiece. Elizabeth assumed he didn’t mean decapitated.

‘Mr Ellington,’ Elizabeth said, firmly but not unfairly, ‘I would like to make it abundantly clear that I do not wish to be your wife.’

‘Oh Beth.’ He sneered, hand squeezing her thigh. ‘You heard Scotty before: polite women don’t have the luxury of saying no.’

‘Well then, Mr Ellington,’ Elizabeth said, throwing his hand off her knee. ‘Perhaps I am impolite.’

Mr Ellington smiled, baring all his fanged teeth in all their yellowed glory, and Elizabeth felt the pinch of a bear trap snapping on her stomach. ‘Then you are in perfect company.’

His eyes flashed red and before Elizabeth could take a breath, he descended on her, forcing kisses on her neck in a disgusting display of arrogance and alcohol. Elizabeth immediately let out a screech, wrestling the man off her.

‘STOP! Stop the carriage! Stop this instant!’

Luckily, the coachman was an honourable man. The carriage quickly rolled to a stop and Ellington wobbled off balance giving Elizabeth an opening. Without wasting any time, she ripped open the door and leapt onto the road.

‘Stupid woman!’ Ellington roared, swinging for her hair and sending blonde pins flying. ‘I demand you get in the carriage this instance.’

‘I shall walk.’ Elizabeth said plainly, rearranging her dishevelled cloak and hunkering down into a brisk pace.

‘Robbers roam these forests!’

Elizabeth was about to yell about how much better their company would be when a clammy hand clamped into onto her lips and a voice, grating and wolfish, snarled into her ear.

‘You should listen to your man, young lady.’

Elizabeth let out another shriek. Immediately, searing pain ripped into her side.

‘He has a knife!’ Ellington shouted. ‘Warton, grab the pistol!

‘Shit.’

As soon as the robber uttered the word, Elizabeth was thrown off the road. Green flashed into black as she rolled into the undergrowth, narrowly missing a tree and smacking into something cold and hard. Her body bounced back, ears ringing and pain ripped across her hip as gunshots rang through the darkness.

‘What about the lady?’ Someone called in the distant darkness. Elizabeth groaned, grabbing at her side. It was wet.

‘Who cares! There’s half a grand of gold in here and I’m not going to lose it for some classless woman, now drive!’

Galloping hooves faded into rustling leaves and Elizabeth cursed. Why did powerful men have to command such a viperous world? Barely able to move, she heaved her body up and levied herself against the cold, hard something. The simple movement left her breathless. Vision wavering, she squinted at the object, fingers gripping shakily at the shape. It was a stone, cut thin and shaped into a sharp arch. She trailed her fingers across the front. It was engraved. A few words. Two dates. A final three letters. A grave.

Elizabeth huffed out a laugh.

‘Guess I’ll be joining you.’ She muttered, head dropping heavily onto the stone. Her bloodied fingers traced the pattern, name forming in her mind.

‘Annalise.’ She whispered, slipping into the mud. ‘I hope you don’t mind, but I think I’ll be sharing this spot with you.’

The forest was far away now, wild winds trapped under deep waters, cooing owls stuck under glass cloches. Elizabeth rolled to the sky, vision blurring the moon into grey. In all her disdain for Ellington, she’d forgotten to curse Scott. How death cluttered your priorities. Perhaps, if the world were fair, the guilt he’d carry for the part he played in her untimely death would provide adequate retribution. But it was a rotten world. And as Elizabeth’s eyes slipped shut, a bitter goodbye wetted her tongue. Then, a hand shot out the ground.

Elizabeth jolted back. The hand remained. Grey skin hanging off bone like rags, the fingers curled under the black sky as if caressing the air. Elizabeth moved a fraction closer, observing the new arrival. The nails were caked in dirt, ring finger missing - presumably stolen by a grave digger - and ribbons of black satin slipped between the radius and ulna. Elizabeth reached out to touch but just as she did another shot out and she fell back with a scream.

This time, it didn’t move slowly.

Two wrists snapping like twigs, the hands slammed into ground and held fast. Bony fingers digging into the ground, the moss tore into veins and as the arms pushed down, the hill rose.

Scrambling backwards, Elizabeth hit a tree but couldn’t stop her white boots licking up mud as the ground gave way, twigs, soil, roots and rocks rolling onto her skirt. Was this a hallucination? The final echoes of a dying woman’s sanity ricocheting off the lid of her coffin? Elizabeth prayed for a peaceful death but without voice it fell flat and from the ground emerged a nightmare.

Rose red lips split into a blackened grin, as the wild white eyes of an arisen corpse glittered at the sky. Mud clung to peeling skin, broken ribs stuck out at unnatural angles, and a chest heaved impossible breaths under a shredded black corset. Stretching thin arms high above her head, the dead woman let out a sigh, clicking her neck, and when Elizabeth’s eyes landed on the two distinctive holes buried there, she finally found her voice.

‘VAMPIRE!’

Tripping over her feet, Elizabeth tried to run, but the tree blocked her path and she fell, bark scraping up her cheek. Still, she pushed as far back as she could, wide eyes glued to the woman and begging her not to move.

The vampire did no such thing.

With the ease of a turning wheel, she faced Elizabeth, offering out a hand and a smile.

‘Annalise.’ She said, then her eyes fell to Elizabeth’s own clutching her stomach in a waterfall of red and her smile cracked. ‘Oh. You used your own blood to revive my name?’

Elizabeth’s throat rasped. ‘Don’t hurt me!’

The vampire frowned.

‘Do you want to die?’

Elizabeth shrieked. ‘No! Please no!’

The vampire smiled again, exposing rotted teeth and fangs that shone like obsidian. Elizabeth failed to move any further back, falling weakly into the tree as her mind grew hazy. She’d lost enough blood before the vampire showed up; she couldn’t lose anymore.

‘Please.’ She whispered, witnessing through glimpses the vampire draw herself up to full height, foot lifting towards the edge of the grave. ‘I want to die peacefully.’

‘And you shall.’

Elizabeth’s eyes flew open. The voice was right beside her ear and when she flinched, two hands locked her into place, sharp nails digging into her skin.

‘Shush…’ The vampire whispered, combing blonde hair back from Elizabeth’s neck. ‘This may hurt. But not half as much as dying.’

And then, without another word, the vampire plunged her teeth into Elizabeth’s neck.

This was written for the awesome prompt ‘blood on my name’ from @flashfictionfridayofficial a few weeks ago - obviously I missed the deadline but the prompt was so good I decided to finish it anyway!

[ugly-crying-over-bucky-barnes]

Dawn in Your Eyes Part 10

Summary: Alfie has little to no idea why Caroline ever gave him the time of day. The blind woman seemed far too sensible to even speak to him. But soon he finds himself falling helplessly in love.

Part 10: A journey to Essex seals the deal for Alfie and Caroline 

           “Did you forget to tell me where we were going?” Caroline wondered as Alfie helped her into the backseat of the car, Pilot following close behind.

           “Did I?”

           She sighed and rolled her eyes. “So, you’re being coy.”

           “Coy? Love, I didn’t tell ya because we’re not going anywhere particularly special, right? A Sunday drive, as it were.” He replied, settling down in the backseat with her.

           “A Sunday drive? I don’t believe for one second that Alfie Solomons would ever want to go for a Sunday drive. I think he would assume it’s a waste of time.” She responded.

           “Clever lass, I can never pull the wool over your eyes, aye?” He chuckled.

           “Well, I am blind so it wouldn’t matter either way.”

           He laughed and unfolded his newspaper, slipping his glasses on. “Cheeky.”  

           Caroline smiled. “So where are we actually going?” She inquired as the car began to pull out from the curb.

           “I’ve got business out in Essex.”

           “Essex?” She asked in disbelief. “Why so far? What business do you have there?”

           “Are you all questions today?” Alfie tried to skirt around her suspicion because he was hoping to surprise her.

           “Are you avoiding my questions?”

           He folded up his newspaper and tapped her on the knee with it. “Best to enjoy the moment sometimes, love.”

           “Mhm, so you are avoiding them.” She sighed and stroked Pilot’s fur. “Alright, I’ll play along.”

           Alfie smiled and leaned over to kiss her cheek. “Just enjoy the ride, we’ll be there in an hour or two.” He promised. "I'll read the news to you."

           "Oh joy." She gave him a look that made him let out a hearty laugh.

~~~~~~~~~~~

           Tired from the long drive, Caroline yawned and stepped out to stretch. “Where are we?” She asked. The imposing smell of coal and smoke from the city was gone. She stepped into a new environment, one that smelled of freshly cut grass and roses.

           “Mr. Solomons.” A man who had been waiting walked up to them.

           “Mr. Graves.” Alfie shook the man’s hand. “This is me wife, Caroline.”

           “A pleasure.”

           “Likewise,” Caroline replied but was still perplexed. She had no clue where they were or what they were doing there.          

           Alfie, on the other hand, was mildly impressed. He didn’t like to parade his wealth like a certain Peaky Blinder. He appreciated comfort and jewels. But he felt that Caroline deserved much more than the modest lifestyle in Camden Town. She deserved a haven. Sure, they had Margate, but Alfie wasn’t satisfied. That’s why he called Mr. Graves about a home outside of the city. Somewhere larger and beautiful. A full garden and plenty of space for the dogs to run. It wouldn’t be too far from Margate and he was confident she could still work alongside Elizabeth.

           “Well, how do you like the look of it?” Mr. Graves asked, turning to look at the large manor they were standing in front of. “Three stories, seven bedrooms.”

           Caroline’s jaw dropped. “Wha-hang on.” She tugged on Alfie’s hand. “Seven bedrooms? What is he talking about?” She asked quietly.

           “Erm, was thinking of investing in some real estate, love. We’re at the place I were thinking of buying.” He explained a bit sheepishly. It certainly wasn’t the reveal he was hoping for but it would do.

           “But I-what on Earth are we going to do with seven bedrooms?” She exclaimed.

           Mr. Graves chuckled. “You’re a young couple, I’m sure you could host many parties there are seven rooms for entertaining. A lovely patio for the summer. The lawn space could also accommodate a tent for a special occasion.”

           Caroline was still trying to process everything. “So, this-you’d like to live here?” She asked Alfie.

           “Part of the time. I mean we’ll keep the flat in London and the home in Margate. But I thought maybe…” He shrugged and squeezed her hand. “It is beautiful, love. I’d love for you to have a nice place like this.”

           She had to take a few breaths. “Well, I suppose when we have children, they’ll fill the space.”

           Alfie grinned. When they had children, not if. “Right, plenty of room to run ‘round screaming.”

           “I hope they won’t be that loud.” She giggled.

           “Oh, love, they’ll be my kids, won’t they?” He teased. “’Course they’ll be fucking loud.”

           Caroline smiled. “I suppose you’re right.”

           “Let me show you around.” Mr. Graves offered and led the couple inside.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

           After viewing most of the grounds, Alfie and Caroline walked out the back doors to the garden.

           “Don’t you think I’ll get lost here?” Caroline asked her husband.

           “I think I might get lost ‘round here.” He chuckled and brought her out to the patio. “But it is quite a place.” He looked out over the expansive lawns. The gardens were a bit overrun. According to Mr. Graves, the family that owned the estate previously had gone bankrupt because of the Depression so it had been a few months since it had been inhabited.

           “Alfie, I’m flattered by the gesture, but don’t you think it’s a little much? We could just get a small cottage.”

           There was a small stone bench by the garden. He guided Caroline to sit beside him. “How’d we fit our big Jewish family inside a little cottage? It's best to have space for Solomons children. Mum always said we're a fucking restless bunch once we start getting the hang of walking.”

           “So…you were being serious out there then?”

           Alfie swallowed. Had she been kidding around with him? “Erm-well yes.” He admitted, not too worried if he put his foot in his mouth but being honest.

           “Oh.” Caroline sat with the admission. She had been serious too but assumed he’d been joking around with her. After all, they’d left the conversation about children a little open-ended. But after talking to Elizabeth, she’d become more serious on the subject. She’d just yet to tell her husband.

           “Were talking to Ollie.” Alfie rubbed his beard. “And I suppose, yeah, we were discussing the potential of me being a father. He was being a little fucking ridiculous, to be frank, but I s’pose he made a few good points.” He shrugged.

           “I spoke to your cousin about it, having children, I mean,” Caroline answered and wove her fingers in with his. “About the possibility of motherhood while still being blind.” She sighed. “It’s scary, Alfie, I won’t lie to you about it. But I also want to have a family with you. There’s nothing else I would want more than to give you children. And I know I won’t be the typical mother but I want-” Her voice broke and she laughed weakly at herself. “You’ll think I’m so silly.”

           “Caroline, nothing you’ve ever said to me has been silly.” He replied softly and squeezed her hand to reassure her. “You can tell me, right, you know that. I ain't never gonna laugh at something you want.”

           “I want to know what it’s like to be a mother.” She looked sheepish, ducking her head with her cheeks turning pink.

           “Now why is that silly, aye? We’re a married couple, right, we ain’t so different from other couples. What’ve they got that we don’t?” He questioned. If anything he would argue that they had much more than other couples. Because no other couple loved each other more than Caroline and Alfie loved each other, he was certain of that.

           Caroline smiled and shook her head. “So, we’re doing this then?”

           “Well, figure the number of times we’ve been fucking, love, it’s bound to happen eventually.” He replied with a cheeky grin. "Can't exactly stop mother nature, can we?"

           “Alfie!” She gasped and smacked his arm. “Be respectful.” But it was hard to hide her coy smile. After all, he wasn’t wrong.

           He chuckled and moved closer to her. “Sorry, sorry.” He tilted her cheek towards him so he could fix her headscarf that was slipping backward a bit. His fingers moving gently to refasten the pin in her hair. Once it was settled, he touched her cheek and gazed into her eyes. “I love you so much.”

           She smiled and felt his warmth close to her face, so she tilted forward to find his lips. He gladly reciprocated, smoothing his thumb over her cheek.

           When they parted, Alfie sighed contently and left a few pecks on her lips. “What’d you think then? If we start fixing it up now, we could have it ready in time for Passover. Have all of Camden Town over for Seder.”

           Caroline looked a little tempted at the idea. She’d spent her entire life being brought to holidays by her aunt. She was just the poor little blind girl. Everyone pitied her. She could never be the hostess of a beautiful Passover meal. They would never visit her home and sit with her husband and children.

           But now? Oh, now she could be the woman of the house. A proud Jewish wife and maybe even mother. She’d stand with her husband, welcoming everyone into her home. She’d introduce her children, all named with purpose and beautiful meanings. She wouldn’t be that blind girl. No one would pity her.

           “I think that’s a lovely idea.” She murmured and pulled him back for a deep kiss.

Permanent Tag: @sansajonsastark​ @giftofdreams​

Tag List: @zazasblogxx​ @thinkingsofamadwoman​ @deaflikehawkeye​

Masterlist

[jilllousestarr-blog]

You have compromised my civil/political and economic/social human rights, Constitutional, Constitutional Amendments, while additionally violating, NJ State Constitutional/NJ Legislative Rights and duties as a "Sworn NJ County Judge in my Probate Case CP-0065-2020. You have violated my State/Federal/International Human Rights additionally. I filed,  Department of Washington DC Justice, Federal Complaints , against, you and all adversaries in my case including, Bostinwick Esq (Firm) and Jean Stark and Barry Frankel. The FBI is also investigating all involved in this  what was once a "simple open and shut life insurance matter." You laugh when I define by  US Federal Courts "Torutre," which simply means, "Inflicting any grave emotional/ physical harm knowing to achieve any wicked goal." I filed a complaint at the world's highest court, the court "I DEAL WITH THE INTERNATIONAL CRIMINAL COURT IN THIS MATTER, Just Alper. I have passed over 50 FBI background checks with a clean record. The State  of NJ has a unbroken record of precedents that,no  "Life Insurance Benefactor permanently disabled having a medical federal medical necessity for medications who cannot afford nor live without  shall be deprived of any life insurance owed to them for any length of time without proper and fair "Social Equitable American Jurisprudence." No one in this nJ state ever has been deprived of it, until this case, Judge Judi. Jean Stark Frankel " HAS NOT ONE SHRED OF ANY ACCEPTABLE 4 LEGAL FORMS OF EVIDENCE ACCEPT 1) HEARSAY 2) CONSPIRACY THEORIES 3) SLANDER 4) PERSoNA OPINION UNLESS SHE HAS "ESP." SHE WAS NOT AN EYE WITNESS I MET HER ONCE IN MY ENTIRE lIFE SO SHE CAN NOT BE ANY CHARACTER WITNESS AGAINST ME JUDI! HER FATHER FREQUENTLY USED "UNDUE PURSUATION/FORCE AGAINST ME AND NOT THE INVERSE! HE HAD HIS OWN ESTATE ATTORNEY, JEANNIE HAD HER OWN TO ARGUE WITH HIS. HE HAD POWER AS A FORMER MILITARY PSYCHOLOGIST AND NAVAL INTELLIGENCE OFFICER FOR OVER 35 YEARS AS WELL AS A HISTORIAN WHO STUDIED WITH THE LIKES OF, FORMER SECRETARY OF STATE< MADELINE ALBRIGHT, HE HAD ADVISERS AD STOCK BROKERS, I HAD NOTHING. HE ONLY RETIRED FROM TEACHING AT OVER 4 UNIVERSITIES IN STATE NJ ONLY 6 MONTHS PRIOR TO HIS DEATH HE WAS NOT MENTALLY INCAPACITATED. HE KNOWS MY FAMILY, MY KIDS, BOUGHT ME A $25,000 ENGAGEMENT RING. TORTURE  IS A CRIME AGAINST HUMANITY. BUT I DID NO T WANT TO MAKE ENEMIES WITH YOU JUDGE JUDI. YOU FORCE MY HANDS IF YOU HAD ONLY DONE THE CORRECT THING FROM DAY ONE. WHY DO YOU DO THIS? I HAVE A "GOOD IDEA." LOOK, I HAVE A SINGED LETTER FROM THE GOVERNOR OF NJ WHO CAN PARDON A DEATH PENALTY AND DESIGNATE AS A LIFE INSURANCE RIGHTFUL BENEFACTOR IN A SINGED LETTER YOU HAVE SEEN OVER 50 TIMES THAT IS ENOUGH "PREPONDERANCE OF EVIDENCE TO WI AND I KNOW, YOU KNOW THAT , JUDGE JUDI. I STUDIED INTERNATIONAL NATIONAL CONSTITUTIONAL CRIMINAL INSURANCE PROBATE ETC AS WELL AS MANY OTHER TYPES LAW FOR OVER 16 YEARS IN THIS STATE AND WORLD. YOU CAN NOT OVERRULE ANY STATE DECISION WHEN THE EXECUTIVE LEGAL EXECUTIVE IN NJ STATE PHIL MURPHY SAYS IT AND HE HAS RULED IN THIS CASE! I WIN! ANY OTHER DECISION JUDGE JUDI LEE ALPER ? I WILL SIMPLY APPEAL IN THE NJ STATE COURT OF APPEALS AND EASILY WIN MAKING YOU A "FOOL." TRY IT? I WILL TAKE IT TO THE SUPREME COURT. I ASK FOR WHAT JEAN FRANKEL ASKED FROM ME WITHOUT MISTAKINGLY PUTTING A PRICE TAG ON IT.  IRREFUTABLE HARM  FOR TORTURE KNOWINGLY LYING TO YOU ON HER INITIAL FILING IN THIS CP CASE YOU "IGNoRE THE FACTS IN AND A JUDICIAl VAlUES AS WE! You say "I can not have any witnesses ONLY JEAN STARK FRANKEL CAN." YOU SAID weeks ago "YOU DONT WANT TO HEAR  MY MOTIONS THAT JEAN FRANKEL lied All oVER HER INITIAL COURT PlEADINGS HA H>> IT IS EXtREMELY IMPORTANT To PRove THE SHIT LYING CHARACTER OF MY ADVERSARY, JUDI! You ARE REAllY LOOKING AT JAIL AND BEING THROWN OFF THE BENCH POST DC DEPT F JUSTICE AND FBI INVESTIGATIoN IF YOU "RB THAT LIFE INSURANCE N JANUARY 12TH. D IT I IW NY APPEA EASIlY AND WIN You AND I KNOW THAT. I HAVE BEEN A PART of AS MANY TRIAlS Globally, Judi. "THE BALL IS IN YOUR COURT. THE DEPT OF DC JUSTICE CONSIDERS ANY CORRUPTION TORTURE AND/OR DISCRIMINATION AGAINST ANY PERMANENTlY DISABlED US CITIZEN AS I AM, JUDGE JUDI  Alper "A CIVIl CRMINAl FEDERAl CRIME ," IT RANKS UP THERE WITH TERRRorISM AND ESPIoNAGE . HAPPY NEW YEAR THE BALl IS IN YOUR "CURT! PS: My "l" key broke sorry. I really hope you "WISE UP!" JS International Investigator, UN Legal Advisor to the International Criminal Court.Show less1REPLY

[popculturebuffet]

Jake Reviews Stuff: Close Enough: Logans Run’d and Room Parents

IT’S FINALLY HERE, PERFORMING FOR YOU. Seriously I have waited 3 years for this. And while yes thanks to a combination of a french animation festival and HBO’s own oopsie doodle I was able to watch 3 episodes already, and review them, it dosen’t make this any less sweet.  The fandom can finally come togehter as a whole and enjoy the hell out of the series. And doubling my excitment is the fact that HBO Max dropped 15 episodes! 14 episodes bundled into half hours and one extra long episode that seems to feature one of the greatest musicans and comedians of all-time, a man who needs no introduction but hell if i’m not giving him one. WEIRD, AL, YANKOVIC!

I could not be more excited if I tried. And yes that’s with full awarness my pre-amphibia and owl house workload just became at LEAST 4 times what I expected and this may be all there is. Having to review 12 episodes still means getting to WATCH 12 episodes of a show I truly adore. It’s an easy trade off. So with that out of the way, we can dig into close enough’s second two episodes and see if the show can keep the momentum from the first pair! Door’s open, let’s do this! The full review and spoilers under the cut. 

Logans Run’d   With Candace having her first sleepover Josh and Emily (Who apparently aren’t on good enough terms with their parents to have them watch her something I hope they explore later in the series), have their first Candace free evening and spend it as you’d expect for a 35 year old couple: Pelvic thrusting to turn down to what while doing general errrands then planning to have a nice night in of tea and the great british baking show, which continues this show’s hard to get used to trend of using actual brand names.  The two invite Bridgette to join them which she scoffs at saying the pair, and Alex who is not only delighted to join them but is in an old timey sleeping costume with listening horn which, no joke, is his profile picture on the show’s website, which feels perfect honestly and I love everything about that. 

The three soon realize to their horror through flashback that they indeed are old (Hilariously alex’s is literally just his introduction in this episode), and beg Bridgette to take them along to a club, Logan’s Run’d. What follows is the three of them getting hard core drunk all the way to 9PM while  Bridgette flirts with a younger guy and youtube sensation and who looks like the earth 3 version of hank venture.. until it turns out he’s actually a toddler wearing some sort of robot suit because of course.  Things go south however both as our heroes realize their running out of steam.. and as another 30 something is made VIP>.. which in this club is being murdered to death by a giant fan. With blood which I”m sure JG was giddy to do first chance it was approriate given he did 8 years of a show on a children’s network and children’s networks hate blood as much as they hate actually letting shows mention the concept of death directly by name.  Naturally the four of them want to book it out of there: While Bridgette , if she wasn’t lying about her age to the toddler, isn’t in the danger zone, she still just hit on a toddler and is naturally afraid of going to prison, but get stopped by the bar guy. Alex, in a supremeley sad yet badass moment, pulls out his blockbuster card and prepares to sacrifice himself for his friend’s sake: Partly because he cares about them and candace and partly because he’s worried he has nothing left to live for now he’s old, something I myself worry about going into my 30���s next year. Josh (Emily takes a second to join in) rushes to save his best bud and the two reassure Alex he has a future, a future of not having to get new music, of having nights of just relaxing and watching tv and getting pepper in your beard for , as Alex puts it “That george clooney look” Bridgette was the last one and guards her friends from being murdered for obvious reasons before breaking the fan.  Our heroes are saved, alex and me honestly as all of that sounds really appealing to be honest and I live 2/3 of it already, are convinced that growing old is pretty sweet. Oh and the owner turns out to be an old guy, as Alex realizes when he refrences logans run and is murdered by the crowd. Our heroes enjoy pancakes, Bridgette still finds the guy cute which.. no no bridgette just no, and Alex muses about them having seen a man die.  Final Thoughts: A decent episode.. while not as good as 100% no stress day ahead of it or the previous episode, i’ts a simple episode with good gags, an utterly great character moment for Alex which shows that despite his weirdo exterior he’s a damn good guy and he has something to live for. Also the toddler subplot was stupid and kinda creepy. A decent gag filled episode withs ome great ones and some really good animation. Also the opening is utterly iconic, easily one of the shows best jokes so far and probably in total and still works despite the use of turn down for what being slightly dated, but it works because it’s just really damn funny. Not the series best thus far but it’s still okay if a standard episode is this enjoyable. 

Room Parents: Now this is the good shit. It’s parent meeting time at Candace’s school with Me Daughter Teacher having one last announcment while Josh is about to pass out from having to hold in 3 powerades... dude should’ve gone for gatorade.. it still goes through you it just tastes objectivley better. Anyways me Daughter Teacher locks the room for the announcment because he needs a room parent and things quickly turn to purge as everyone is either fleeing or trying to murder each other to avoid it. While i’m not a parent, I can at leat understand not wanting to give time to do this when your schedule is likely already a hellscape. Josh (Who wonders if they got a purge going, got a good laugh out of me. ), being basically what if Mr. Peanutbutter had an illigitmate son he dind’t know about, and i’m still not convinced he’s not his dad until the show proves otherwise, happily volunteers to Emily’s horror.  Josh however.. is entirely game. He even makes a dad joke calling it a “Fun Raiser” to emily’s annoyance. It’s a nice show of just HOW opposite the two are: Emily being more stressed, as 100% stress day proved/will prove given it’s after this episode even though i’ve already seen it but it’s set later but...

The point is she’s a ball of stress while he’s a ball of enthusasim just like his dad, who i’m now just.. 100% convinced is his dad and dosen’t know it. Prove me wrong. Anyways Josh meets Nikki another parent whose own son is ominously framed in shadow because of course something weird about her who offers to pitch in.. and is also transparently intrested in josh.  The next day Josh and nikki talk on the phone and Bridgette and Alex instantly pick up that she’s into him and that josh is the kind of guy every girl wants, with Bridgette sighting the look when he inhales mustard and Alex, being the objectivley best, citing his thin papery jack of clubs body type. I’m now 100% convinced they all had a foursome at some point before the divorce which Emily tries not to think about and Emily isn’t convinced.. until Josh, in another great gag, says Nikki said “wash your balls, so random”.  Emily, now panicked, enlists Pearle who gladly volunteers her spy van, because Pearle is also objectivity the best, to go spy on alex in a montage set to heart’s crazy on you were we get our image for this episode which is a great gag.. especailly Emily mouthing “Wait afterwords’ and it being followed by them going to the sex hotel.. which is actually the essex hotel.. which is for affairs as it’s sign says. It’s hard not to just list gags for this show because it’s damn good but i’ll try.  Emily then confronts Josh that night (doing the dramatic light turning on thing by holding the lamp another great gag), and Josh explains no he’s not cheating on her because he’s a pure boy, and he aquises to her, also finally realizing Nikki’s been transparently trying to seduce him.  Naturally their attempt to uncoroomparenther before the Fundraiser goes pear shaped as it turns out Nikki is a con artist who pulls what professionals call a josh , scam a stressed parent, tie him up or kill him and then steal the fundraiser money for a school, for a living (She has another one cooking at the moment) and leaves them. Emily orders a knife via a delivery service, while a waiting Pearle wonders where they are.. which raises a lot of questions. WHy pearle is there is easy, she’s supporting Candace and her friends/tennants. That part is easy. Why she brought Randy, who at least at this point is objectively useless and why Alex and BRidgette AREN’T there I can’t explain. Maybe mecha pope garfield rose from the grave. Maybe Bridgette’s fucking that clown again. Maybe Alex has more garifled theroies to bust out. Actually those last two answer my question for me.. I mean someome’s gotta reveal Garfield was a founding member of the Justice Society of America. 

Our heroes arrive however to Foil Nikki , who thent ries to escape on a children’s train.. which being a children’s train Josh and Emily just hop on and in a hilarious bit slowly remove the kids before ending up with Candace, who says “daddy’s girlfriend is getting away”. Jessica DiCiccio is a delight as Candace and her delivery is impecable here. However Nikki switches tracks and cranks up the speed. Thankfully while Emily and Candace fall off the train pearle and Randy, who I STILL don’t know why he’s in this episode he has no lines and does nothing, catch them, leaving it to Josh to fix his mess. After a breif fight and a nut shot Josh sucesfully swaps the money for Nikki’s fake son/dummy who she chokes bart style before both explodes when they hit a thermometor factory.  Our heroes win, the fundraiser is a sucess and the teachers have elected Josh room parent for life (”That can’t be legally binding” “IT’S LEGALLY BINDING!”)  Final Thoughts: A great , really damn funny episode with a great premise. While Emily being worried Josh would cheat seems weird given he’s a nice enough guy, it’s sometimes understandable to be panicky about that sort of thing and her worry is warnated given one party is trying to seduce her husband, josh is just too stupid to realize, which makes for a lot of great gags. It’s a really tighly done episode that like the above is more pure comedy and just hilarious, but has even better jokes and a much better executed premise to work with. And no weird toddler things. So overally a slam dunk.  I have more close enough reviews coming today, obviously though i’d rather watch the rest before reviewing them, but while I do you can shoot me an ask to talk more close enough, and in more serious matters... One of my best friend’s cat’s cancer has come back and being out of work and just having moved into a new appartment, he needs help paying for it. You can find the go fund me here.  And as always until we meet again, later days. 

[essexfactor]

The green grasses, trimmed to an exact cut evenly throughout the field; ever-lovingly tended to be groundskeepers glory. A nice, blue sky, a deep azure hanging just overhead. Seventy... Three degrees? Yes, just a nice warm day.

Years; time untold; this would have been wonderful weather for a picnic, would it not? Not a cloud nor a concern within the sky to mar the mood, ever prevalent and wonderful. Evenly, each single image carved into notion. Ever perfect, anything more would be unforgivable.

All the headstones lined in rows, chipped, sounded down through years of weather eroding at their surfaces. Perhaps the families of those were uninterested in the upkeep of stones? Perhaps no one was left to cater to them?

Shame. All any of these people were completely gone, nothing more than taking up land better suited for anything else. These honored dead a sham, waste of time and resources. Remove them from their tombs, their graves, and burn them down. A parking lot would serve more use than anything here.

“Nathaniel? Are you home? Nathan?...”

All but one. All but a single, wonderful difference. There, beyond the decaying memories and poorly kept stones; beyond a simple plot of land for some miserable miser or useless mistress, sat a fully polished and wonderfully kept headstone.

Up to His chest, shaped in vibrant reds and blacks, shaped like their favorite suite, a headstone admired yearly, no matter the existence that He would find Himself in. Carved perfectly, never a scratch or mark, maintained daily, at no point abandoned.

“Are you listening to me? Nathaniel?!”

It was not often something as simple as a folding chair would need to be with Him, poorly crafted. But yet, the day was just being started, and He would be here the duration. Others were left to tend to themselves, they would be fine. He was busy with the most important thing on today.

“Hello, my dear. I have missed you.”

REBECCA ESSEX December 15th 1585 - May 8th 1616

It was not the specific day that mattered. It was what that day would become. The second Sunday of May. Mothering Day. “I brought you some flowers, Rebecca, hopefully these will be good enough,” placing them gently at the base, His hand returned to His lap, giving some thought to His being, “had them picked specifically for this event, thought they would be special.”

No no no, she can’t be home now, no I’m too close! Quickly, his frame turned about face, staring to the door. It was locked, thankfully, giving him some time to hide what was going on. Silence. Be silent and figure your next need.

“Thomas is too close, so close to being cured and I can’t have her down here yet. I must finish this process...” Hands rushed about the lab, body nearly floating in place to make amends to his actions. Were she to come down here, it would be over. Everything he’d spent months planning would be for naught and their family ruined.

“Come on, hurry up your ignorant machinery. I hate this damned technology...” No matter how advances the machines got, these Celestial computers, they were still machines. Computing nonsense.

“Nathan?” Short breathes, attempts at the locked door knob just at the foot of the stairs. No! He’d lost focus, no longer shielding her eyes from the door. He’d have to hurry...

“I found a wonderful few prospects, have I told you yet? Oh, my, they are a mess. One of them has physical needs, a very... Touchy person. My, he cannot go without contact. Yes, why yes he is a member of homo mutare. Oh, do not give me that, they are not everything. I have moved on from that, Rebecca, please.”

It was not uncommon to find men and women speaking to deceased loved ones at their graves, though it was odd to see them speaking to one so old. The diamond shaped marble a stark contrast to the ivory stones reaching to the sky. And the Man sitting their, speaking His heart out, pale and colorless skin radiant off the sunlight.

“The other one? Dear Me, Rebecca, the child is a mess. She needs better vocal training, badly. And such panic and simplicity. While the other one needs broke from their desires, this one needs broke from their dependency. And yes, I shall break them.

In time, My dear, things do not just get rushed about. I need time. I still must return the alien and the strigoi as well, as useless as they were, I have need for their skills I bestow them. Yes, I am working on that too.”

“Nathaniel Alexander Essex you open this door NOW!” Forceful woman, you don’t understand. None of them would. Tubes and wires pumped into their toddler son, chemicals rushing through his veins. Any moment now the process would be done and he’d...

“What is that beeping sound?” THUMP! “No, no no no!” THUMP!

Gingerly, Essex leaned back in His chair and reflected at her stone, remembering she was gone. “Hours, you and I would stay up just... Blabbering about nothing. Nothing in the world. You would ask Me about work, I would make a terrible joke, and you would laugh. Bless your soul, you would laugh to save my ego.

My pride. It was always that, was it not? My fragile ego getting in the way of us, Thomas, everything. I was a fool then, Rebecca. A foolish, terrible man...”

The door busted open, clothes torn from Rebecca’s shoulder as smooth blood stained her outfit. Bleeding from the shoulder, trickling down her arm, the woman examined the equipment around her in awe.

Machines- foreign and alien- clung to the wall in fantastic lights and colors. Sounds inhuman echoed all over the room, blaring a terrible sound. In the center stood a man, if she could dare say it, bleached white with terrible red eyes.

And on the table lay her son. Her baby boy hooked with wires and machines. Machines beeping a terribly monotonous sound. What was going on, what was... “Nathan what are you doing?” What happened to him?

“It’s not, it’s not...”

“What are you doing to my son?!” Down the stairs she rushed, never faster in her life did she move like now. Greased lightening, poised and readied to scoop up her son from this freak, this monster, but he was faster, catching her within his grasp and letting her see him for what he was-

-but all she could see was the hideous and illuminated diamond on his forehead.

“I am... I am going to make this right, Rebecca. Not like I had done prior, no, Lord En Sabah Nur is long taken care of. I mean make it well. Fix this, all of this; what I should have done from the start! I am a fool, a blind and arrogant man, unable to see the wealth I had before me.

Too much, I let things get out of control, every out of hand. I will change that My dear, I will make the proper amends.”

“Let me go what did you DO TO HIM!”

“Rebecca calm down, I’m fixing him!”

Eyes widened, the words searing into her brain, “You strapped him into whatever these machines are and turned yourself into some demon creature of the night to FIX HIM?! Let me go Nathan, LET ME GO!”

They struggled, gaining and losing ground. As forceful as she was, he was stronger. Nathan always had been. Her footing slipped, forcing him forward and throwing her behind. It was quick, it was final.

Behind her jutted out a large metal rod, jagged, a useless piece he’d yet disposed of. Her eyes flickered, they wavered back and forth looking for hope. She only found him. Warmth filled his torso, bleeding downward as they’d been impaled straight through and out.

“No, no Rebecca I...”

Blood trickled gently down her mouth, lips staining red. With her cheeks puffed up, she took a pull and released, spitting her blood across his face. “I.. I can’t believe this. I find you, utterly... Contemptibly sinister.”

Day passed Him by, the Sun slowly edging to the horizon to once more sink into the ground; disappearing for another night. All day He joked, teased and colluded with, longing.

Longing was the feeling He use to describe this day. Memories and terrors, once a distant past now full and living. “One day, I shall meet you again, hm?, I shall meet you and give you what you deserve proper- not a burial or apology. I shall give you a reason to take back your words.”