#Enthusiastic oppressor ;; RICO {Di Ravello}

[stuff-the-rebellion-said]

Di Ravello: *stops firing the Mstitel’s minigun at Rico*

Di Ravello: YOU DEAD YET, RODRIGUEZ?

Rico, from behind a stone pillar: NOT YET!

Di Ravello: *keeps firing*

[theiirstoriies]

Rico tag dump !!

[eliitesquad]

Mario Frigo is open for business!!

Canon character from the video game Just Cause 3 (if you haven’t played it, I highly recommend it, this game is hella fun). Mario is a mechanic and leader of the rebellion in the made up Mediterranean island of Medici. He is best friends with Rico Rodriguez and called him back home to help free their country of the enthusiastic oppressor Sebastiano Di Ravello.

He’s a fun-loving nerd who packs confetti in with the tanks and the guns. What more could you want?

[stuff-the-rebellion-said]

Rico: My friends. Are they okay?

Di Ravello, laughing: No.

Di Ravello: And it’s not merely your friends at risk now.

Rico: Medici?

Di Ravello: Bigger.

Rico: The world?

Di Ravello: Bigger.

Sheldon: *gasp* America?

Di Ravello: … Light has yet to reach the depths of your ignorance.

[stuff-the-rebellion-said]

Di Ravello: Upon reflection, I realize that a man of my military expertise requires more private quarters; a place where I can reflect upon my past victories and contemplate on my nonexistent failures.

Rico, yelling from the roof: Is that place called ‘Denial’?

[stuff-the-rebellion-said]

Di Ravello: How DARE you mock me in such a manner?

Rico: Well, how would you like me to mock you, then? I take requests.

[stuff-the-rebellion-said]

Rico: Hey, Di Ravello! I’ve got one rocket left, and I know exactly where I’m gonna stick it!

Di Ravello: One rocket, you say? Well, that’s a shame, Rico Rodriguez, because I have plenty!

Mario (over the ComLink): Are you crazy?!

Rico: Sometimes, the best approach is simply the most direct!

[stuff-the-rebellion-said]

Di Ravello: I don’t think you respect me enough.

Rico: I offer you exactly the amount of respect you deserve: none.

[stuff-the-rebellion-said]

Di Ravello, leaning out a window: Would you stop this foolishness?!

Rico, bouncing across his rooftops on the pogo stick: What foolishness would you like to see?

[stuff-the-rebellion-said]

Rico: You’re going down!

Di Ravello, in his helicopter: Do your worst!

Rico: Well, you already exist so there’s really no topping that.

[stuff-the-rebellion-said]

Di Ravello, over a speaker: The so-called ‘hero’ Rico Rodriguez speaks of affairs he knows nothing about.

Rico: That is true!

Di Ravello: He has no respect for my leadership!

Rico: That is also true!

[stuff-the-rebellion-said]

Rico: Anyone ever tell you you’ve got anger issues?

Di Ravello: I prefer the term ‘leadership skills’.

[stuff-the-rebellion-said]

Di Ravello: Welcome to the Fuck Rico Rodriguez support group, where we gather around to collectively say “fuck you” to that pathetic child with a rope and a squirrel suit.

Di Ravello: But first, a word from our newest member.

Mario, dressed as a soldier, sweating: ... So I think I may have misunderstood.

[stuff-the-rebellion-said]

Di Ravello: You won’t like me when I’m angry.

Rico: I don’t like you ever.

[stuff-the-rebellion-said]

Di Ravello: Your insolence goes too far.

Rico: Wrong. It can go a lot further.

[stuff-the-rebellion-said]

Di Ravello: Shoot him.

Rico: Go ahead, Di Ravello, do it. But I’m gonna warn you, when I recover, I’m gonna be pissed.