#Dr. Richard Rolle
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chi-va-piano-arriva-dopo · 7 months ago
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Richard O’Brian, “The Rocky Horror Show”.
“I Would Like, If I May, To Take You On A Strange Journey.”
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lesvieuxjoursart · 1 year ago
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Special 2 part episode of Dr. Boosh! Part 1 of Time Waits for No One
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altamontpt · 2 years ago
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Tom Waits - Rain Dogs (1985)
Rain Dogs é um Swordfishtrombones em esteróides, demente e circense como o seu antecessor mas agitado e nova-iorquino.
Rain Dogs é um Swordfishtrombones em esteróides, demente e circense como o seu antecessor mas mais agitado e nova-iorquino. A revolução acontecera no disco anterior, Swordfishtrombones (1983), quando Waits,  assumindo as rédeas da produção, substitui o jazz de hotel de outrora por uma linguagem mais excêntrica e teatral (Captain Beefheart e Kurt Weill à porrada num cabaret berlinense). Rain Dogs,…
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whencartoonsruletheworld · 1 month ago
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Hey so like many of you, I saw that article about how people are going into college having read no classic books. And believe it or not, I've been pissed about this for years. Like the article revealed, a good chunk of American Schools don't require students to actually read books, rather they just give them an excerpt and tell them how to feel about it. Which is bullshit.
So like. As a positivity post, let's use this time to recommend actually good classic books that you've actually enjoyed reading! I know that Dracula Daily and Epic the Musical have wonderfully tricked y'all into reading Dracula and The Odyssey, and I've seen a resurgence of Picture of Dorian Gray readership out of spite for N-tflix, so let's keep the ball rolling!
My absolute favorite books of all time are The Haunting of Hill House and We Have Always Lived in the Castle by Shirley Jackson. Classic psychological horror books about unhinged women.
I adore The Bad Seed by William March. It's widely considered to be the first "creepy child" book in American literature, so reading it now you're like "wow that's kinda cliche- oh my god this is what started it. This was ground zero."
I remember the feelings of validation I got when people realized Dracula wasn't actually a love story. For further feelings of validation, please read Frankenstein by Mary Shelley and The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde by Robert Louis Stevenson. There's a lot the more popular adaptations missed out on.
Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier is an absolute gem of a book. It's a slow-build psychological study so it may not be for everyone, but damn do the plot twists hit. It's a really good book to go into blind, but I will say that its handling of abuse victims is actually insanely good for the time period it was written in.
Moving on from horror, you know people who say "I loved this book so much I couldn't put it down"? That was me as a kid reading A Little Princess by Frances Hodgson Burnett. Picked it up while bored at the library and was glued to it until I finished it.
Peter Pan and Wendy by JM Barrie was also a childhood favorite of mine. Next time someone bitches about Woke Casting, tell them that the original 1911 Peter Pan novel had canon nonbinary fairies.
Watership Down by Richard Adams is my sister Cori's favorite book period. If you were a Warrior Cats, Guardians of Ga'Hoole or Wings of Fire kid, you owe a metric fuckton to Watership Down and its "little animals on a big adventure" setup.
A Raisin in the Sun by Lorraine Hansberry was a play and not a book first, but damn if it isn't a good fucking read. It was also named after a Langston Hughes poem, who's also an absolutely incredible author.
Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury is a book I absolutely adore and will defend until the day I die. It's so friggin good, y'all, I love it more than anything. You like people breaking out of fascist brainwashing? You like reading and value knowledge? You wanna see a guy basically predict the future of television back in 1953? Read Fahrenheit.
Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain and To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee are considered required reading for a reason: they're both really good books about young white children unlearning the racial biases of their time. Huck Finn specifically has the main character being told that he will go to hell if he frees a slave, and deciding eternal damnation would be worth it.
As a sidenote, another Mark Twain book I was obsessed with as a kid was A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court. Exactly what it says on the tin, incredibly insane read.
If Beale Street Could Talk by James Baldwin is a heartbreaking but powerful book and a look at the racism of the time while still centering the love the two black protagonists feel for each other. Giovanni's Room by the same author is one that focuses on a MLM man struggling with his sexuality, and it's really important to see from the perspective of a queer man living in the 50s– as well as Baldwin's autobiographical novel, Go Tell it on the Mountain.
Agatha Christie mysteries are all still absolutely iconic, but Murder on the Orient Express is such a good read whether or not you know the end twist.
Maybe-controversial-maybe-not take: Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov is a good book if you have reading comprehension. No, you're not supposed to like the main character. He pretty much spells that out for you at the end ffs.
Animal Farm by George Orwell was another favorite of mine; it was written as an obvious metaphor for the rise of fascism in Russia at the time and boy does it hit even now.
And finally, please read Shakespeare plays. As soon as you get used to their way of talking, they're not as hard to understand as people will lead you to believe. My absolute favorite is Twelfth Night- crossdressing, bisexual love triangles, yellow stockings... it's all a joy.
and those are just the ones i thought of off the top of my head! What're your guys' favorite classic books? Let's make everyone a reading list!
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occamstfs · 7 months ago
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Higher Education
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Bit of a belated 4/20 TF! Reliving the heady days of his weed-filled youth may not help a professor's tenure track. Enjoy! -Occam
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It had been quite a while since Richard had cut himself some slack. He was on track to be tenured and the obligations and rigor involved gave him little time to himself. His department has really become more of a family to him than his estranged once loved ones. He spends more waking hours in this office than any room of his spacious home. Today he’s burning the midnight oil yet again as he mars a doctoral candidate’s thesis draft in red ink.
Seeing just how much of a scarlet mess he has left for this poor student he pauses to make himself a cup of tea. He certainly doesn’t want to be seen as too critical or crotchety, though he feels assured that his students know this. Upon returning to his desk he finds a small wrapped gift box resting squarely on the marked up essay. He knows precisely who it is from and chuckles as he looks at the kitschy weed-themed wrapping paper. 
Picking it up he hears something small and light shake around in the box. The tag reads: “Happy 4-20 Old Man, why not live a little- your favorite Candidate, Mac.” Slowly unwrapping it Richard smiles wistfully as he recalls way way back to when he was in undergrad. Walking down smoke filled dorm hallways bleary-eyed as he contributes to it. Just smoking grass on the main lawn welcoming anyone to open their minds at these little sessions. An alarm goes off on his computer shaking him from his reverie as he sets the gift down to respond to the pile of emails that have accrued today.
Richard begins his cookie-cutter responses to colleagues, scratching backs and brown nosing as need be to advance his own career. Not too long into this dull work however does he begin to smell that unmistakable skunky scent coming from Mac’s half opened gift. He scoffs and rolls his eyes, shocked that his subordinate would fully shepherd drugs into his office before pausing to remember that weed is legal here, in this state at least. He tosses the box in the bag making sure the scent can’t escape as he returns his attention to the ocean of busywork.
He cannot find purchase however as he finds himself impossibly distracted, the tea he made tastes bitter in his mouth and every so often he smells a whiff of the joint hiding in his bag. Richard rushes through a couple of responses before checking the clock and realizing Mac was right, partly that is. He can afford to head out a little early. It is a holiday of his youth after all, he thinks to himself smiling mischievously as he grabs his coat and heads to his home. 
Tenured he may not be but he makes enough to live incredibly close to campus. It’s about five so theoretically the work day is over anyway, but he lives close enough that should there be need he could easily return. He would be happy to even, he puts his hand in the bag and fingers the ripped paper of the gift box. Patting it as if to say maybe another time, though resolving to chew out Mac for such an inappropriate gift. 
Tossing his bag on a chair and entering his quiet home he pours himself a drink and heads to watch the daily news. As soon as it touches his lips though he spits it out all over himself. It was beyond revolting, for the life in him he can’t figure out why though? It’s what he always has as a treat isn’t it? He wipes up his mess and grills himself as to what on Earth caused him to do that. Going down the list of possibilities he finds himself distracted as wafting from his open bag is the impossibly alluring scent of Mac’s joint. 
For a time he just sits and stares at his bag, mulling over any real consequences there could be to just letting himself smoke just this once. He’s sure his colleague Dr. Bennet can barely go a school week without smoking away at least a day. Flicking the metaphorical angel off his shoulder he decides to go for it. It’s just one joint, what could possibly go awry.
The doctor takes one massive hit and remembers that whatever the kids are smoking today is leagues more intense than the kush he had back when. He coughs heartily and stumbles into his kitchen to get some water, smiling as he remembers the old adage that coughing actually gets you higher. He pours a cup for himself, spilling a tad over the counter and neglecting to clean it up.
Richard decides to throw on a record before returning to his joint once more. God he remembers loving nothing more than just sitting and watching his wax spin on his player as smoke danced in the air. He reclines back and immediately feels more at home. He’s lived here for almost a decade now and never has he felt more comfortable than this moment. He laughs at himself wondering why he’s waited so long to smoke again. Maybe he should text Mac and thank him?
At this his phone rings and he sobers up almost immediately, his first couple hits washed away as he sees a text from his department head. He holds the joint with his lips as he uses both hands to unlock his phone, smoke sailing wistfully past his eyes as he starts to read it. Sitting there looking at the bright screen of his phone alongside the ever increasing smoke though his eyes quickly dry and he sets it down. How important could it be anyway? The workday is over; he is under no obligation to respond, he reasons. Surely it’s nothing. He sets his phone down and goes to lie back on the couch and listen to his old music, taking another massive hit.
He struggles to kick his shoes off as they suddenly grow uncomfortable on his feet, almost as if they were a couple sizes too small, that can’t be right though as if his feet were growing in his old age. He laughs at the idea, picturing clown feet at the bottom of his thin legs, not seeing in reality that his feet are starting to strain his socks. Nor could he possibly notice as their odor begins to mingle with the overpowering smell of weed filling his den.
His phone vibrates again and he furrows his brow before his eyes glaze over as intended. His clothes all over begin to feel a little uncomfortable on his body. He grimaces wondering what exactly the move is before duh, this is his house! He hits himself on his head as he decides to just strip, he was always half naked smoking outdoors back then he may as well do so in his own house. Taking off his clothes he doesn’t notice as there is a skip in the record as it changes, the grooves warp, harden, and shrink as his pristine record collection diminishes into a massive, slightly disheveled CD collection. Richard certainly doesn't notice as he scratches at his chest, the only thought in his head as he rips his joint once more is “Man, I love this song.”
He giggles once more as he hears his stomach rumble and he recalls what a persistent issue the munchies have always been for him. In fact it was one of the reasons he quit back in his grad school, he simply couldn’t afford all the weed along with the food budget that satisfying his cravings demanded. Shouldn’t be a problem now though, he thinks, he is an, uh? Pausing as the haziness sets in his eyes burning pink as the thoughts in his head slow. He’s a professor right? Though his mind slows he continues his steady crawl to raid whatever snacks lie in his cabinet.
There he, surprisingly, finds a stoner’s paradise. The shelves are lined with chips and cheap pastries beyond imagination. He once more holds the joint in his mouth as he reaches deep to double fist some bags of chips, tacitly continuing to smoke as his stomach rumbles in jubilation. In his gluttony he drops bags to the floor and laughs letting the joint fall to the floor wondering if the five second rule applies to weed, guffawing some more. He hears his own voice in his head telling him to keep it down but as if he’s going to listen to that square.
He turns up his CD player’s stereo in protest as his inner monologue grows more agitated. Dude you’ve gotta turn it down, you share a wall with the neighbors. He stuffs his hand in the potato chips and starts devouring them as he reflects on this. Shares a wall? But that would be he lives in a duplex, or wait? He looks around his place and sees it smaller than he remembers it, right? Continuing to scarf chips getting grease all over his hands and face as, so far beyond his notice, it begins to produce more oil itself than it has in decades. 
Continuing to snack he hears his phone ring as his boss is fully calling him now. Stumbling up and over to his phone Richard doesn’t notice as his thighs begin to fill his underwear. He had lost a lot of weight from his long years of working and now that he is finally indulging once more it seems a healthy weight is returning. Rubbing together as he makes his way to the couch, the friction draws his attention to just how pleasurable physicality is when he’s high. Gosh he needed this. 
He grows distracted as he arrives at the couch, his phone stops ringing before starting up again as his Department head calls once more. Seeing her contact picture appear he says aloud, “whatever bitch” laughing like an ass as he hangs up on her and sets his phone to do-not-disturb. Once more there is a buzz in the air as the music set up changes once more. Phone now in hand he starts to play music the only way he has ever known, wrinkles and the few gray hairs that remained totally disappearing from his face as he presses skip on his phone and is awash in adoration as his all time favorite album starts playing. 
He sits there and just takes in the music as he rubs his slightly distended stomach. Grimacing as he thinks he should start hitting the gym. He hears Mac all the time talking about how much he loves hitting the gym high. His heart suddenly flutters as he thinks about Mac and grows giggly again. He feels a pang in his head that such behavior is inappropriate. He is a prof- He’s a? His mind strains to recall what exactly he is. His eyes search the room looking for any hints before landing on the TV seeing the Daily News that has been playing through it all suddenly turn to static before coalescing into the video game Mac was always talking his ear off about in office hours. In the once professors mind though the only thought present is, Fuck! I love this game!
Energy surges through his body as he searches for a playstation remote. His pulse races as his excitement grows and he feels a desperate urge to stretch. He feels as his tendons extend. Rubbing his arms across his torso he feels his increased weight begin to coalesce into firm yet weighty muscle. His hands twitch and scratch against his increasing strength as he controls on the couch, moaning and laughing at just how lascivious this pleasure is, his voice vibrating deeper as the pitch of the song and video game blast louder in his head. Haha wait a second, he thinks, I’m so fuckin’ sore I must already be going to the gym faded with Mac right?
He blushes and stretches some more, feeling his back arch and his tight torso stretches to its limit before surging beyond it. His arms raised behind his head they grasp at air and feel the sought after remote and a hat which he instinctively throws on. Ah this hat is Mac’s isn’t it! He is briefly confused once more as he tries to remember what exactly his relationship is with Mac. It’s? He’s, are they roommates? Rich looks around the room, eyes shifting to where there once was a record collection, no a CD stand? Why would he need either of those though haha, as if Mac’s apartment has space for that!
Mac’s apartment. The thought repeats many times over in his mind and his eye twitches as he feels a pain that the high cannot make pleasurable. Grimacing, he decides to try and focus on the game. Black ink slowly staining his body as he clicks buttons. After little time at all though he realizes, fuck, it’s been so long since he’d hit that joint hasn’t it?
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Pausing his game he uses his bleary eyes to scan his apartment floor for the roach. He didn’t drop it in the chip bag did he? He checks far too quickly to possibly see it before giving up. There’s gotta be an easier way to smoke some more right? Out of the corner of his eye he sees the rocks glass he was using as a stupid smile inches across his face. Through the haze in the room the only thing Rich can see when looking at such a cylinder is a bong. Rich reaches for it, the glass growing taller and embellishing as he does. In a fluid motion he snatches it and starts to stumble around and look for a lighter. 
Lucky for him in Mac’s apartment they seem to be scattered around as if they were decoration. Thinking of Mac his mind is a sea of conflict again and there is a sudden urge, a craving, a need to smoke right now. He lights the bowl and before he even inhales from the beyond filthy bong he is at ease once more. Smoke rocketing into his lungs he holds back a coughing fit before a giggle breaks the line and he loses control. 
Between each cough he feels himself lose something. He sees Mac and laughs at the idea that he could ever be in charge. Mac’s older than him, right? He sees an unfamiliar house that he could never afford as it turns to static and shrinks into a small one bedroom apartment that doesn’t even have his name on the lease. He sees a degree he sees multiple degrees and not only can he not imagine himself having the willpower to get them, he laughs at the idea that he would even want to sit through a single college course. Smoke fills the air as if he were hotboxing the apartment and he rubs his body as hair pushes its way out of his skin. He needs to shave, Mac like him smooth. 
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Feeling his body once more, flexing his bare body against the couch and rubbing his hands across his itchy stomach smiling without a care in the world or a thought in his head he hears a key turn in the front door. His eyes stay closed as his smile grows wider and the only man, the only thing, that matters to him in the world approaches. Mac stands over him, dressed in a suit as he clearly came from the campus and says, “Miss me, Dick?”
Dick’s eyes burst open more bloodshot than could possibly be healthy and he stares wordlessly, longingly, into the eyes of the man domineering over him. He’s a little confused at what the smirk on his face could mean, but Dick is confused most of the time, so he’ll just wait for Mac to explain! 
He doesn’t. Mac leans in close to Dick’s ear and just whispers, “Happy 4-20 Doc. Thanks for giving in.” Then puts his mouth over Dick’s before his mind could even recognize the words being said. He loses control instantly without a hand touches his cock as it expands heartily, no underwear to hold it or his cum back as he forevermore loses control over his mind, of his life. Not that he minds, how bad could life be with someone as nice and great as Mac watching over him! The two continue to make out on Mac’s couch, not caring for the cleanliness of the suit as the bong is knocked onto the table. From now on there is little at all that Dick would care about at all besides his master, his Mac.
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wufflesvetinari · 25 days ago
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ok i'm going to write a ted lasso episode. whumpy but in the way canon can be whumpy. ready? here we go
it's early season 4. ted is back, with henry flying in soon to stay in richmond for a year. ted's set up his bedroom, stocked the apartment with Nerds (henry's favorite candy and a bit harder to find in the uk), even bought a goshdarn ps5. this is going to be great!
meanwhile, jamie has an extremely difficult session with dr. sharon where he ends up unexpectedly unpacking amsterdam for the first time. she did NOT know this was coming when he started telling her the plot of major motion picture the fault in our stars and she did NOT lead him into it as gracefully as she would have liked. you can tell that she's trying to end the session in a less raw place but it is NOT working because she lets him sob about stroopwafel for too long (in an attempt to end on positive memories with his mum) before realizing it's not about the fucking stroopwafel
when the hour is up he bolts out of there despite her best efforts. she drops her rock-solid professional neutrality, presses her forehead into her hands, and says "maybe fucked that one"
but you know what? jamie is handling it. he wakes up the next day, cleans all the snotty tissues off his bed, and comes up with a PLAN.
see, the thing is, he was WAY more stable when he was a prick. and he's practiced so hard NOT being a prick, so...it's overtraining, innit? he forgot to rest his emotion muscles so now he's raw everywhere and cries too much in therapy and wants to fucking scream all the time. so the obvious solution is to take a rest day from having emotions. easy!
and you know what makes it super easy to not have emotions? being a massive prick! it's fine. it's for his health!
MEANWHILE, ted wakes up to news that a storm's grounded henry's flight on a layover. and that something went wonky with his ticket so the airline couldn't immediately find his reservation/rebook him, which was super scary for henry bc the flight didn't have someone attending him the way they were supposed to. and as much as he wants to be with his dad it's already stressful to be leaving the US for a year
so everything's gone wrong, and he called ted like four times but ted slept through it. so by the time they connect henry's super stressed and kind of. yells at his dad for the first time.
so that's a bad start to the day! ted is so disoriented he brings the shopping bag of Nerds to work instead of his lunch
jamie shows up to the locker room having pasted his s1 body language onto his s3 self. he had meant to keep to himself today, but unfortunately his prick persona is an ENTIRE persona, and it doesn't super feel like a choice when he starts making snide comments and sneering at everyone. it feels a bit like one of those horror movies where you can't take the creepy devil mask off, EXCEPT IT DOESN'T, because feelings are absolutely not happening right now, which is! great! fine!
everyone is disturbed (except for ted who's caught in phone tree purgatory with british airways, sorting nerds by color on his desk). jamie insults colin's new threads, implies isaac can't handle the captaincy, turns down a high five from dani with a roll of his eyes, says hi to sam.......actually, he talks to sam completely normally. everyone makes vigorous questioning gestures at sam behind jamie's back. sam shrugs
it gets worse on the field, where the mood is already tense and darkens further when jamie refuses to help richard up after a tackle. beard and nate accuse roy of having given jamie the prick signal by accident somehow. roy denies it but starts second-guessing himself under scrutiny, trying to dissect whether jamie had interpreted the extra paprika he'd put in the curry when meal-prepping for jamie this week as a fucking. secret signal or something.
meanwhile ted is offering his life to british airways. indentured servitude. anything. he would take back 1776 on behalf of his people if he could. he is constantly on the verge of a panic attack and that REALLY bothers him, because it feels like all his progress is going up in smoke over henry hanging up on him
higgins finds him alone in his office gently thumping his head against the desk. "you know, you're such a great dad," ted tells him. "you've built a beautiful family. there's no...gnarly intergenerational emotional knots, no conflict in the House of Higgins. how do you do it?"
higgins blinks at him. "ted, dana knocked terry's tooth out last month. lindsay is a priest."
"well hey now, that's not inherently--"
"no, but it does suggest the presence of some interesting intergenerational emotional knots."
ted blinks up at him. higgins smiles; takes a seat. he says, "fathers and sons."
back outside, roy's starting to lose it. he's becoming honestly scared for jamie, but every time he tries to start a conversation jamie fucking...twists it into a fight, and roy fucking FALLS FOR IT like an IDIOT even though he knows better. because he's gotten out of practice dealing with Prick Jamie and also because jamie knows all of his weak spots now. it's freaking him the fuck out
and jamie is also starting to scream in his own head a little bit. like yeah he'd actively decided on Rest Day, but now he isn't sure how to stop doing Rest Day, and everybody is looking at him weird and that makes it worse, doesn't it, because his stupid lizard brain says he's under attack.
the prick persona is protective, so he keeps on pricking. ignores dr. sharon's phone call. ignores keeley's suspiciously-timed text about getting mimosas. ignores nate trying to give him a helpful-mean speech on the sidelines. ignores--well, no, he slaps sam on the back like usual.
can't be a dick to sam. it's sam, like.
roy mimes furious questions at sam, who's accepted this day for what it is and shrugs harder
ted's out on the sidelines by now, but he's still on the phone. he finally gets henry's ticket sorted, and calls him back in the airport. henry's in tears apologizing for yelling, but ted is just happy he's okay!! and he's going to be with him in london soon!! and...maybe ted didn't handle that perfectly, but it doesn't have to be some grand referendum on ted's parenting ability or his mental health. it's just a missed flight. slow progress is still progress. he's ok. they're both ok
practice ends. jamie slinks back into the locker room with everyone else. he changes into his street clothes lazily, dismissing any attempt to talk to him (ignores jan, ignores zoreaux, ignores roy, says "bye sam" - roy yells "fuck!" around the corner)
the locker room's almost empty. ted calls, "jamie, could you just stop by my office for one sec?"
jamie braces himself. ted fucking lasso is the last thing he needs. ted's the final boss of Rest Day. ted's going to say something that makes him feel fucking terrible about his behavior, and he's not even going to be able to apologize because he's fucking stuck like this, isn't he? like a car stuck in reverse. all he can do is go further back into prickdom: bluster his way through until ted gets fed up and sends him home.
he slams the door closed behind him. "so you got any pearls of wisdom for me, coach? some yoda shit? because i'm getting pretty tired of you pretending to be my fucking dad when we both know--"
"just wanted to give you these," ted says calmly, tossing him a ziploc bag. it's full of yellow Nerds. several little boxes' worth.
"what" jamie says
"i know you only like the yellow ones. needed something to do with my hands, so i sorted some out for you. we won't tell roy, ok? a little extra sugar never killed nobody. except i guess for diabetics, but, well--"
jamie stares at his bag of nerds. he stares harder. he bursts into tears and sinks onto the office floor.
after a beat, ted sits down there with him, waiting for him to get the words together--he babbles something about dr. sharon, and how bad today's been, and about how he really didn't mean to be awful and he thought he was over all this already--both over amsterdam and over treating his friends like this (ted has no idea what "amsterdam" means here but he nods sympathetically)
and he tells jamie about henry, and about how badly he panicked today, and about how progress isn't linear. and it's nice. and jamie gets a hug and puts himself together well enough to run out and catch up with the team for drinks
the rest of the coaches creep back into the office.
"how the fuck did you do that?" roy demands. he is texting jamie as he speaks. he will make him a big, bespoke breakfast tomorrow after their run and glower about it. he will fail to put any of these feelings into words. "how did you--fucking--manually override prick mode?"
nate's eyes are a little shiny for reasons that are NOT projection. "yeah, ted. i mean, things haven't always been smooth with you and jamie, but it's like you've...learned, over time, just what to say. i really do admire that about you."
"oh, well," ted says from the floor. he nods absently to himself, pushing his tongue around the inside of his cheek.
beard leans back in his chair. "you had no idea any of this was happening. you have no clue what we're talking about"
"nope,” ted says. "no, sir, i do not. just thought the kid would like some nerds"
"FUCK" roy says
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glitt3rcritter · 3 days ago
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OUTLAST HEADCANONS ’’
Who voted for who?
(THIS IS A JOKE OLEASEEEE)
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Father Martin; Yeah ... He voted red. I don't know what else to tell y'all..
Richard Trager; Voted red, then went out for drinks.
Dr. Wernicke; said "fuck america" in German then fell asleep.
The variant in the chair that attacks you; Didn't vote, was too scared, had a panic attack then ultimately passed out.
Silky Variant; was kicked out because he creeped the ballot workers out.
Chris Walker; believe it or not .. I think this man voted blue he wants to see a female president.
The Twins; Didn't vote and didn't care but they're hoping Kamala wins
Billy Hope; Voted BLUE 💙 and probably spelled out "KAMALA" with the nanobots thingies
Miles Upshur; Voted blue because Trager and Father Martin voted red
[OUTLAST: WHISTLEBLOWER]
Jeremy Blaire; Voted red because he doesn't like women.
Eddie Gluskin; Voted red cuz he doesn't think women should have abortions.
Waylon Park; Voted blue because he loves his wife.
Lisa Park; Voted blue because she is the wife.
Dennis; Voted red because His grandpa told him to.
[OUTLAST: 2]
Papa Knoth; Voted red.
Marta; Didn't vote
Blake Langermann; Voted blue because he loves and respects women.
Lynn Langermann; Voted Blue because she is a woman.
The phantom baby that Lynn gave birth to; Can't vote.
Jessica; also cannot vote.
Val; Didn't vote, was too busy rolling around in mud.
[OUTLAST: TRIALS]
Franco Barbi; Forgot to vote.
Mother Gooseberry; Voted for a secret third option.
Leland Coyle; voted red.
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metalphoenix · 3 months ago
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Trans Dick Grayson Head canons
He knew from super young that he was a boy. Like he was 3 or 4 telling people he was not a girl. I like to imagine his parents just kind of rolled with it. Like they live in a circus. Being weird is like... a prerequisite or something. Maybe Richard is what they were gonna name him if he had been born male so he chose that then found out that Dick was a nickname of Richard and the rest is history.
All this to say, he'd been living as Dick Grayson for years by the time he met Bruce.
This is how I think Bruce found out. So Dick wasn't born in the United States (no idea if this is canon or not but for the sake of this head canon that is the assumption I am operating under). So it would probably take Bruce a bit to get all of Dick's papers like birth certificates and other forms and he's very confused as to why he got a girls birth certificate?
Dick *walking into Bruce's office*: Hey B
Bruce: Oh good, I wanted to talk to you. Do you have a sister or a female cousin you haven't told me about?
Dick: No???
Bruce: Ok well I'm trying to get all your papers sorted and I think Haly may have sent me the wrong ones because these are for a girl named [insert dead name of choice] Grayson.
Dick: What? No, thats me?
Bruce *now very confused*: What???
Dick *confused at Bruce's confusion*: Ya? I was born [deadname] but thats not my name anymore?
Bruce *realizing this means his new tiny son is trans* hnn
Bruce asks him a few days later if he wants him to change his paperwork so it says Richard Grayson and has his sex marker as M. Dick is kind of confused why it matters but is just like sure?
The Puberty Talk is very awkward on Bruce's front. He ends up talking to Dick about hormone blockers to hold off on puberty for a bit which Dick agrees to. He starts blockers at 11.
At 13 he starts on a low dosage of Testosterone under the guidance of Dr. Tompkins and a pediatric endocrinologist.
Bruce does all of his T shots for him and they make a little event out of it. They day they do the shots they take a night off from patrol and order take out and eat it on the couch while they watch a movie. These are also the only days Alfred lets them eat ice cream straight out of the carton. (Bruce still goes on patrol but only after Dick goes to bed. It wouldn't do to have a very noticeable pattern of days he takes off).
Because of this Dick never goes through female puberty, combine that with the fact that everyone knows Bruce Wayne adopted a son, he's pretty much stealth.
When he's 16 he starts talking to Bruce about getting bottom surgery (he doesn't need top surgery seeing as he never grew breasts). He has all three bottom surgeries over the next year.
I like to think that he just... forgets people don't know. Like it doesn't occur to him that to everyone thats not Bruce, Alfred or Leslie he just looks like a cis dude. Maybe when he's like 17 he goes to pride and wears a trans flag or paints the trans flag on his cheek or something. The papparazi take a photo of him and it becomes Big News.
They hold one press conference to be like "ya I'm a trans guy, I've always been a trans guy. No stop asking about my transition that is private medical information"
He becomes more involved in the trans community after that.
Extra: Maybe he is an olympic athlete as well. obviously he competed in mens gymnastics. Imagine the debates that would cause.
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aestheticaltcow · 2 months ago
Text
Wedding of the Year
Sierra and Carmy are getting married, and you and Richie play important roles in the ceremony. Of course, the two of you will find some time for some fun.
MDNI 18+
Previous Part
The Bear Masterlist
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“It’s so pretty! He has surprisingly good taste,” you gushed as Sierra showed you the shiny platinum emerald-cut moissanite ring with small pearl details on both sides, creating a unique yet classic three-stone ring.
“I don’t think he picked it out himself, but I do love it- and him.” she smiled as she ran her thumb across the stones. “And now you have something to fidget with.” you cracked, elbowing her before you hopped down from the low brick wall the two of you had been sitting on during her lunch break from the hospital. Sierra rolled her eyes, “Downside, Dr. Dunlap is being a booty hole about me ‘being engaged to her ex’, like girl- he never even referred to you as his girlfriend. Pull the stick out of your butt, and let me be happy and in love.” 
You shrugged, “Well, I should probably get back to work. See you tomorrow night for dinner with your fiance.” you teased slightly. Sierra laughed and nodded, “Hey, Y/N, just to let you know… Richie is gonna be there. If we do a traditional wedding, Carmy wants him to be his best man… obviously you’re my maid of honor. It’s not gonna be like weird or anything, right?” 
You shook your head, “Sierra, I couldn’t care less about what that man thinks of me. He called me a whore like six months ago; it’s ancient fuckin’ history.”
Sierra shot you a concerned look. The shitty part about being twins was the fact she always knew when you were lying, even if you didn’t know it yourself. It had hurt when Richie called you out six months ago, and you’d be lying if you said it wasn’t something you’d thought about periodically here and there, but you’d do anything to make Sierra happy. She was your big sister- by 17 minutes- after all, and if that meant dealing with Richie for a few hours every so often, all be it.
~
Richie was frustrated about needing to go to your apartment that evening. Since he confronted you, he’s successfully avoided you like the plague, but when Carmy told him he proposed to Sierra, and she’d said ‘yes’, he knew he’d have to deal with you again at one point. “Let’s get this over with…” Richie mumbled to himself as he knocked on the door to your apartment. When you opened the door, you stood in awkward silence before moving to the side to allow Richie into your place. 
“Sorry about the mess.” you half-heartedly apologized as Richie removed his jacket and threw it on a small kitchen table separating the main room of your apartment and the open kitchen area. You crossed your arms over your chest as Richie looked around your apartment, “You have a Master’s degree?” he asked aloud as you moved toward your well-loved red couch. You nodded, “I’m working on my PhD in microbiology. I teach at The University of Chicago.” 
“That’s pretty badass… women in STEM and shit…” Richie awkwardly stammered as he noticed the pictures on the walls. He assumed some were science-related as they were rounded images of what he imagined were cells or something. He smiled when he noticed a picture of you and Sierra from what he presumed was high school or college graduation.
“Thanks. I’ve been told it’s impressive- but I’m also just a slut.” you rolled your eyes and moved to sit on the couch. You brought a box up from under the coffee table and waited for Richie to sit beside you.
“For what it counts- I’m sorry for calling you a slut. I have a daughter, and I-” You cut Richie off with a blunt scoff. “Fuck off with the pseudo feminism Richard. Let’s just go through these pictures and be pleasant for the sake of Sierra and Carmy.” 
Richie sighed, “Okay.”
Neither of you was sure how you’d gotten into this predicament. You’d gone from being at each other’s throats and looking through Sierra-provided/approved photos for some wedding slideshow to Richie being in your throat. Now you were laid back on the couch while Richie ran his tongue through your velvety folds. You pulled at the little hair he had as one of his slender fingers slipped inside of you, brushing places you could only dream of getting by yourself. You mewled at the sensation, bucking your hips against his mouth, desperate for more. Richie suckled at your clit, savoring the taste of your fluids. 
“F-fuck!” you exhaled as your legs shook as your orgasm had finally peaked. Richie hummed against your upper thigh before gently biting the sensitive skin just hard enough to leave a slight bruise. With that, Richie sat on your couch as you panted, attempting to catch your breath. He chuckled as he ran his hands over his mouth, wiping away the evidence of what he’d done. You moved to sit up and looked over at Richie, lustfully ready for round two, especially after noticing the lump in his boxer briefs. “Let’s go back to my room?” you whispered as you moved to rest your hand on his thigh.
Richie wanted to say ‘yes’, but when he looked at the clock, he remembered the babysitter was only booked until 10:30. He groaned and placed his hand over yours, “I want to, I really fuckin’ want to, but I gotta get home to my kid.” 
You frowned but nodded reluctantly, “It's okay.” 
~
Richie wanted you. He watched as you stood in a circle with some of the other bride’s maids; he breathed deeply as you brought your vape to your lips. Seeing your lips wrap around anything was getting him hot. “You okay there, Richie?” Pete bantered as he stood before Richie with one hand in his pocket and a cocktail in the other. Richie tilted his head to the side and waved off the man so he could continue staring at you, “Go for it.” Pete commented as he looked over his shoulder to see Richie had been starring at you. “You and Carmy could be brother-in-laws.”
You were talking to a group of your and Sierra’s high school friends when you felt a hand on your lower back. “Hey,” Richie greeted you warmly. You smiled in his direction and noticed one of your friends nudge the other before walking away. “Scarin’ my friends away old man.” you playfully teased as you turned to face Richie. 
“You look pretty…my kid is at her Mom’s place.” 
You clicked your tongue, “I don’t know Richie. Turns out Carmy has some REALLY hot friends… you’re not my only option.” 
Richie chuckled as he looked around the room, “Baby girl… they won’t fuck you right. Don’t you want a real man?” 
You felt your cheeks heat up as Richie’s hand got closer to your ass cheek, “You’re not wearin’ panties…” Richie mumbled into your ear. You playfully hit his chest, “Wouldn’t you like to know.” you teased. 
“Prove me wrong, Y/N.”
You looked around the room and ensured your parents were occupied before looping your finger around Richie’s belt, “Meet me in the bathroom…”
~
“Fuck your-” Richie grunted as he continued to thrust his hip into you, “your pussy’s fuckin’ perfect.” you met his compliment with soft mewls as your head bumped against the wall of the bathroom stall. Your dress was hiked up above your hips. Richie squeezed your thigh, pulling it up over his hips as he fucked you against the wall. You sank your nails into his neck as you felt the knot in your stomach tighten. “Feel good, baby? Cum on my fuckin’ cock.” 
“Mmm, yes, Daddy.” you whimpered as his thrusts started to get sloppier and shorter—the bathroom filled with the sounds of slapping skin and both of your moans. “I’m gonna cum- uh fuckfuckfuck!”
You stood in front of the bathroom mirror fixing your lipstick as Richie zipped his pants and wiped his brow. “Wanna come over tonight?” he asked as you moved to fix your hair, you shrugged. Richie groaned, “Y/N, come on.” he stepped forward and wrapped his arms around the bottom of your stomach and leaned against your back resting his chin on your shoulder. “How bout I take you out for dinner some time?” he offered moving to kiss your jaw. You giggled and put your hands over his, “When?” you quiered putting your head back against his shoulder as he moved to pepper soft open mouth kisses on your neck. 
“Whenever you’re free.” 
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smilingformoney · 6 months ago
Text
Icebreaker | Alexander Dane/Reader
I. Never Meet Your Heroes
Summary: As a budding actress and a big fan of Alexander Dane, all your dreams are coming true when you land a role in Galaxy Quest opposite your favourite actor. To your disappointment, Alexander doesn't seem to like you very much - but unbeknownst to you, he's trying desperately to ignore his attraction to you.
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Read now on Ao3 or below the cut:
You were almost vibrating with excitement on your first day on set.
You hadn’t taken part in the table read, as your casting was so last minute, so this was your first time meeting the cast and your first time playing the scene would be when the cameras were rolling. You were nervous, but you didn’t mind - you’d spent plenty of time as a theatre understudy, so you were used to playing a scene against someone you hadn’t rehearsed with. What you weren’t used to, however, was playing against such famous names.
If that weren’t enough, your main scene partner was to be none other than Alexander Dane, who just so happened to be your favourite actor in the world.
You wouldn’t quite say you were obsessed with him, but you had seen all his films, and you’d even managed to see him perform Shakespeare in London once, though you’d missed out on seeing him at the stage door. You also had a poster from his performance as Richard III on your wall, and hidden away in notebooks you’d never shared with anyone were fanfictions you’d written about his Galaxy Quest character, mostly involving romances between Dr Lazarus and characters you’d made up that totally weren’t stand-ins for yourself.
And now… you were actually going to play a love interest to Lazarus!
All your dreams were coming true. Your first TV role, in Galaxy Quest, with Alexander Dane, playing Lazarus’ love interest!
You absolutely, resolutely, could not fuck this up.
Your character’s name was Bethany, a fellow member of the Mak’Tar race, who, like Lazarus, believed herself to be the last of the race until she and Lazarus meet by chance and the two are faced with the question of whether they should procreate to repopulate their species.
On your arrival, you met with the production assistant, who led you to hair and make-up to be fitted with a cap similar to the one Alexander wore to make yourself look like an alien.
You were almost done, your hair now completely hidden by the cap and the last of your make-up being applied, when the door was thrown open and none other than Alexander Dane stepped through and sat himself down in the chair next to yours, completely ignoring you, which was fortunate because it gave you an opportunity to close your mouth when you gaped at him.
“Let’s get this blasted thing on quickly, Lena, I want to get today over with,” Alexander grumbled.
Lena, the make-up artist, rolled her eyes and continued working on you with hardly a flinch at Alexander’s abrasive attitude.
“I’m nearly done here, Alexander, then I’ll be with you.”
Alexander looked over and seemed to finally notice you. He frowned, then saw the matching cap on your head, and rolled his eyes.
“They’re going ahead with this bloody plotline, then,” he grumbled, then immediately grabbed a magazine from the dresser and stuck his nose in it.
You hadn’t said a word, and yet somehow you felt like you’d managed to fuck up your meeting with him.
“Don’t mind him, [Y/n],” said Lena, apparently completely unaffected by Alexander’s grumpiness. “He’s always like this. I must be his least favourite person on set because I’m the one who puts his cap on.”
“Third least,” Alexander replied from behind his magazine. “After Jason and Frank.”
“Jason Nesmith, he plays Taggart,” Lena explained to you. “And —”
“Frank Ross, the creator, I assume,” you finished.
Lena smiled. “You’ve done your homework!”
“I watch the show, I know who created it.”
Alexander groaned and lowered his magazine to finally look at you, albeit via the mirror. “Great, they hired another fan. When did this show stop hiring actors?”
“I can be both!” you said defensively. “Besides, what’s wrong with hiring fans? There’s no point in creating art if you don’t love it.”
“Pfft. I’d hardly call this show art. It’s nothing but meaningless drivel, and this episode’s no different, so don’t flatter yourself into thinking you’re creating something great just because you’re on TV.”
“All done!” Lena announced, ignoring Alexander, and she stepped aside to let you examine yourself in the mirror. “What do you think?”
“Wow, that is weird,” you laughed, turning your head to the side to examine your new alien look. “You can’t even tell I’ve got hair underneath! I look pretty good, actually, maybe I’ll shave my head after this.”
Alexander scoffed. “Take the cap with you, make it a new fashion trend.”
“Right, Alexander, it’s your turn!” Lena announced, and the actor just sighed.
“Fine, let’s get it over with.”
Lena gave you directions to the costume department and you left feeling even more anxious than before about your scenes with Alexander Dane.
---
Although your background was in theatre, you knew from industry knowledge that in film and TV, scenes were never filmed in order. So it was a surprise to you that your first scene of the day was actually your first scene of the episode. Your character Bethany was locked in a futuristic alien zoo, gaped at daily by an alien species that marvelled at “the last Mak’Tar.” That was, until the crew of the Protector came by to rescue another alien from their zoo habitat, and Lazarus found Bethany in her cage.
You ran through the scene with the director a few times before Alexander’s arrival. Once he did arrive, he only talked quickly with the director before getting into position, and suddenly you were moments away from your first scene.
The director raised her megaphone. “ACTION!”
Lazarus approached the invisible barrier that surrounded the habitat, staring in disbelief at the figure curled up on the floor. The floor itself was wet sand with small pools of seawater, just like the environment of his home planet of Tev’Meck. Without the rest of the zoo in his periphery, he might even have believed he was back on Tev’Meck.
He glanced down at the information screen. It was all written in an alien language he couldn’t speak, but he recognised two words: Mak’Tar and Tev’Meck.
Lazarus walked around the enclosure slowly, trying not to wake the figure on the floor, until he was able to get a good look at them. Sure enough, they shared his physiology. Could it really be that another one of his kind was here, in this zoo?
A crash in the distance caused Lazarus to look up suddenly. Taggart, no doubt, causing chaos as he attempted to escape with the alien he’d come to recover.
He had to get out of there. And if there was a chance this sleeping figure really was another Mak’Tar, he had to get them out of there too.
Lazarus circled back around to the information panel and hacked the operational code he’d learnt earlier before coming to save their target. A few beeps later, the forcefield was down, and Lazarus stepped into the habitat, crouching down by the figure to wake them.
“Hello?” he whispered. “Can you hear me?”
He grabbed the figure’s shoulder, rolled them onto their back, and recoiled slightly in shock. It was a female Mak’Tar!
The woman opened her eyes slowly, blinking away the sleep, frowning in confusion at seeing a figure looming over her.
Lazarus composed himself and knelt down again.
“It’s alright, I’m here to help. My name is Lazarus, I’m a Mak’Tar too. What’s your name?”
“…Bethany,” replied the woman, pausing as if it took her a moment to remember.
“Well, Bethany, how would you like to escape?”
“I… I think I’d like that very much.”
Lazarus smiled and nodded. “Excellent. Take my hand.”
He stood, and Bethany took his outstretched hand. Wow, his hands are soft , you thought as Lazarus pulled Bethany to her feet. She took a step, but stumbled. Lazarus glanced down and saw that she was favouring her left foot, her right being bandaged. Without hesitation, Lazarus threw her arm around his shoulder and helped her stumble out into the corridor.
“Cut!”
For your first take, you thought it had gone pretty well. You hadn’t messed up once! Whether or not Alexander agreed, you weren’t sure, because he simply released your arm from his grip and immediately walked back to his original mark for the second take.
You ran through the scene three more times, filming from different angles each time, until the director concluded the scene finished.
What amazed you about Alexander was the way he switched between Lazarus and Alexander with ease. Action - he was a hero, a lone survivor who had to contain himself at the possibility of finding another survivor in favour of concentrating on a quick exit. He was smiling as he pulled Bethany to her feet, his eyes warm and kind, and just a little excited. Cut - he was an actor, a grumpy thespian stuck in a job he hated, just getting through the day until he could throw the cap back in Lena’s face and stomp off home. He let go of you as soon as he could, not looking at you or even acknowledging your existence outside of the scene.
Ever heard the saying never meet your heroes? Well, you were discovering now why that was true. Alexander Dane was your favourite actor, your idol, your celebrity crush and the reason you’d pursued acting in the first place. And, it turned out, he was a massive jackass.
You weren’t naïve; you hadn’t gone into this expecting your crush to fall in love with you and whisk you off on some romance. You hadn’t even expected to make friends with him. But you had hoped to at least have a good working relationship with him for the week you were there and to come away with some fun stories about the week you spent on the set of Galaxy Quest.
Apparently, that wasn’t to be. So you resolved yourself to give the best performance you could and hope the fans liked your character when the episode aired.
Your next scene took place on the viewing deck, Bethany having successfully escaped the alien zoo and finding herself on board the Protector. You stood in front of the glass that separated you from the green screen that would be replaced in post-production with the vast expanse of the cosmos, gazing thoughtfully through the window as the director took some establishing shots of you standing alone.
When she was happy with the solo shots, the director called action for Alexander to make his entrance.
“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” Lazarus said as he stepped up beside Bethany, looking out at the cosmos and remembering what it was like for him when he first looked out into space from the safety of the ship.
“It’s terrifying,” Bethany replied quietly, and Lazarus frowned at her.
“Terrifying?”
“It’s so big… so easy to get lost.” She raised a hand and lightly placed her fingertip against the glass, covering an entire galaxy with just her fingertip. “How many species are out there?”
“Billions, I suppose. It’s impossible to count. Trillions of life forms… and none of them like us.”
Bethany looked up at him. Alexander’s profile was illuminated by the stage lights, emphasising the outline of his nose.
“How can you be sure? Maybe others survived. We did.”
Lazarus shook his head sadly. “I don’t think so. Even if there are… the chances of finding them are minuscule. It’s a miracle I ran into you.” He looked down at her and smiled, not a trace of Alexander’s regular irritation on his features. Lazarus was only kind, curious, and a little hesitant. “Perhaps it’s fortunate that I found you. So we can… keep the Mak’Tar species alive.”
“For now.” Bethany looked back out at the vast cosmos. “We’ll both die eventually, though. Then the Mak’Tar are done for.”
Lazarus hesitated. “Not necessarily. There would be more of us if we were to… make more.”
Bethany kept her gaze firmly fixed on the expansive view from the window.  She blushed slightly - you had never quite grasped forcing the blood to rush to your cheeks, but you could at least act as if it had - then shook her head.
“No, I… I think it’s best not.”
Lazarus was stunned. He collected himself and said, “And let our species die?”
Bethany turned back to Lazarus, and as much as you understood her motivations, you selfishly wished the scene were to end with a passionate make out session.
“It’s survival of the strongest, Lazarus,” Bethany said. You very suddenly realised you’d missed a line, but your theatre instincts kicked in, and you continued. “Our people were squashed like bugs when someone stronger came along. One day, our conquerors will be destroyed by someone or something stronger than them. And so the cycle continues - until there’s nothing left. Why delay the inevitable?”
“All our history, our culture - gone —”
Bethany shook her head. “It’s not gone. It’s just a story now.”
The script called for Lazarus to be speechless, so you gave Alexander a few moments to let the emotions play out on his face, then Bethany glanced out the window again.
“I think I’ll ask to be dropped off on Atera. It always looked very pretty in the books.”
She glanced uncertainly at Lazarus one last time, and when his stunned silence continued, she walked away, leaving him alone with the crushing disappointment that he wouldn’t save his species after all.
“Cut! Great first go, guys, but [Y/n], you missed a line. After Alexander says ‘and let our species die’ —”
“‘Nothing lasts forever.’ Yeah, I know, sorry. Got ahead of myself.”
“Well, at least you kept going,” Alexander said as he came up to where you were standing to take his starting position again. “Most TV actors would have broken character, swore loudly then insisted on trying the whole thing again. You held it together like a true thespian.”
You smiled coyly. He was complimenting you!
“Well, my career has been theatre so far. I’m used to having to improvise on the spot without breaking character.”
Alexander smirked at you conspiratorially. “Honestly, I enjoy it. Keeps me on my toes. On camera, you stop and start again when you make a mistake - everything has to be so perfect. And once the filming’s done, that’s it, no going back. In theatre, you do it a little differently every night. It’s so much more…”
He paused, looking for the right word.
“Organic?”
Alexander looked at you with surprise, as if it were a wonder you understood.
You wanted to talk to him more about theatre, something you both clearly loved, but you had to do the scene five more times to get the right camera angles, so you returned to your mark by the window and readied yourself to do the whole thing over again.
When the scene was finally declared finished, you were done for the day, so you returned to the make-up room to get your cap taken off. Alexander had one more scene to do on the brig, so once Lena had released your hair from its captivity and you were back in your regular Earth clothes, you snuck into the back of the set to watch the cast wrapping up. When else would you get an opportunity to see a classic Galaxy Quest brig room scene being filmed?
Jason Nesmith was giving one of his classic Taggart speeches, all the crew showing rapt attention except for Lazarus, who was seemingly distracted.
The speech concluded, the crew applauded and set to work, and Taggart swaggered up to Lazarus at his station.
“Lazarus! Something up, buddy? You didn’t applaud or nod once during my speech. Was it not inspiring enough for you?”
Lazarus looked up at his captain and smiled good-naturedly. “Very inspiring, Captain, thank you. My apologies, I was…”
He glanced forward thoughtfully, looking at the cosmos through the window and remembering his conversation with Bethany earlier. Alexander in fact looked behind the cameras, and straight at you.
“…distracted,” he finished.
“Ah, thinking of that new girl, are ya? Not surprised, she’s a pretty one. I presume. If she had hair instead of your head thing, I’d think she was pretty. Suppose she’s pretty to you, isn’t she?”
“Mhm…” Lazarus responded, Alexander’s eyes still fixed directly on you. He blinked, as if snapping himself out of a trance, then turned back towards Taggart. “Yes, I suppose she is. Excuse me, Captain.”
He stood and exited the scene by the doors at the back. Jason finished the scene with a conversation with Gwen DiMarco, then the director called cut.
“Great take, everyone! Alexander - your best one yet. You really sold us on how conflicted Lazarus is. Alright, that’s a wrap for today, we’ve got some sets to prepare over the weekend so we’ll see you all bright and early on Monday!”
The crew began shutting down and you slipped back out so as to not get in the way. You were at the cloakroom collecting your coat and bag when Alexander, still in his costume, came up to you, taking you by surprise.
“Jesus! Sorry, Alexander, you scared me.”
He smirked. “Sorry. I just wanted to say, you weren't awful today. Did you say you came from theatre?”
You blushed, and you could feel that this time your cheeks really had gone red. “Oh - wow, thanks. Erm, yeah, nothing major, I’ve just been understudying the last couple of years.”
“Nonsense, understudies are vital! Learning everyone’s roles and being ready to take any one of them on at any moment? No wonder you did so well today without rehearsal. Listen, the cast and I are heading out to a bar tonight. It’s not often we get a whole weekend off. Would you like to join us?”
Surprise and excitement sprung up inside your chest. Surprise that the man who’d been grumpy all day was suddenly being nice, and excitement at the chance to socialise with the Galaxy Quest cast.
“Sure, I’d love to! Where are we going?”
Alexander winced. “Paolo’s Karaoke Bar. I’d avoid that place like the plague myself, but there are private rooms so we won’t be disturbed by fans, and the beer is good.”
“How many beers do I have to buy you to convince you to sing?” you grinned.
“I’ll be blackout drunk getting my stomach pumped before you get a note out of me. Is that a yes?”
“Yes, I’d love to come!”
“Great - and no recording any of it,” Alexander added sternly as you slipped your coat off again and came back inside to wait for everyone to finish getting out of their costumes. “If even a single photo of this ends up on Twitter, I’m holding you personally accountable. We don’t usually invite fans to join us, but since technically you’re an actor…”
“No tweeting, got it. I do just need to let my roommate know where I’m going, though. In case of, you know, murder.”
Alexander frowned at you.
“It’s a girl thing. Go, get de-capped, I’ll wait here.”
Alexander sighed, muttered something about young people, and left you waiting in the hallway, wondering what the night had in store for you.
---
You didn’t remember much of the taxi ride to Alexander’s house. Apparently it took half an hour, but you hardly paid attention, as you were far too busy snogging him in the back seat to care how long you’d been in the car for.
You came up for air when the taxi pulled up to the house, and once you ungracefully clamoured out of the car, Alexander paid the driver while you stared up at the Beverly Hills mansion.
“You live here alone?!” you gasped.
“Welcome to the rich side of town,” Alexander replied, his feet as unsteady as yours as he approached you and wrapped an arm around your waist. “Wanna see the inside?”
“Hell yes.”
After some fumbling with his keys, Alexander managed to get the front door open and he ushered you inside. He switched on the lights, and you gasped at just how huge and open the space was. Half the walls were all window, and those that were actual wall were lined with posters from Alexander’s previous projects - mostly his theatre shows, with a few films here and there.
“That’s the one I have,” you laughed, pointing to the poster of him from Richard III.
Alexander wrapped his arms around you from behind, his erection pressing into your arse as he held you close. “Is that so? How many wanks did teen [Y/n] have staring at that poster?”
“Far too many to count.”
“Did you imagine your fingers were mine?” Alexander murmured softly in your ear, one hand travelling tauntingly slowly past the waistband of your trousers. “Did you slip them inside trying to emulate my cock? Because believe me, mere fingers couldn’t come even close to stretching you the way my cock can.”
“I - I have a vibrator named after you,” you admitted, anticipating building up inside you when Alexander cupped your cunt with his hand, savouring the warmth you were radiating against him.
“My, you really are a naughty thing, aren’t you? Let’s see if my fingers live up to your imagination.”
You gasped as he slipped his middle finger inside you, firm and thick, his skin slightly rough and absolutely nothing like your own.
Alexander kept one arm firmly around your chest, a hand cupping your breast through your top, and you had to lean back into him to stay upright. He buried his face in your neck, teeth and tongue exploring your skin, his hair tickling your face slightly. His thumb circled your lower lips, searching for that sweet spot, and when he found it, you moaned, which quickly turned into a hiccup.
Alexander smirked against your neck, but when you hiccupped again, he paused his sensual movements.
“Hic - sorry,” you mumbled, your head spinning slightly from the combination of alcohol and arousal.
“Sit down, I’ll get you some water,” Alexander said softly. He pulled his hand out of your pants, which you thoroughly disliked, but you did feel better when he deposited you on the couch and went into the kitchen to fetch you some water. The couch was warm and soft, and you felt like you could just sink into it and sleep as comfortably as on a bed…
The next thing you knew, you were lying on your front, your eyes blinking open, though you quickly squeezed them shut when you saw the sunlight pouring in from the window.
You buried your face in the pillow and let out a groan. Your head was pounding. Great, you’d woken up with a migraine.
No… it wasn’t a migraine. It was a hangover. You could feel the familiar ache in your stomach as it tried to digest the alcohol you’d consumed.
You’d been hungover enough in the past to know your routine. Toilet, coffee, a greasy breakfast and a shower, in that order.
You reluctantly sat up in the bed, your eyes adjusting to the light, and your heart skipped a beat in fear for a moment when you didn’t recognise your surroundings. Whose bed were you in if not your own?!
You looked around for a clue, and on a wall was a glaringly obvious one - a massive four-panel framed art piece featuring Alexander Dane’s brooding headshot.
Oh god, you were in Alexander Dane’s bed.
…Alone. Where was the man himself?
You rolled out of the superking-sized bed, which was difficult as you were slap bang in the middle. You reached the edge eventually, and when you threw the covers back and sat up, you noticed that your trousers and bra had been discarded, but you still had your top on.
You trudged into the en-suite bathroom, which was bigger than your own bedroom, and sat down on the toilet. You’d solve the mystery of how you ended up alone in Alexander Dane’s bed in a bit - you had to take care of business first.
When that was done, you were feeling a bit more awake, and managed to find your discarded trousers on the floor. You couldn’t find your bra, so you pushed that thought aside for later, and turned your attention to finding Alexander.
He was, you discovered, fast asleep on the sofa in the living room, mouth gaping most inelegantly as he snored, one leg bent and the other splayed on the floor, with one arm on his chest and the other behind his head.
You nudged him softly. When he didn’t respond, you tickled his exposed armpit.
“What the fuck!” Alexander grumped as he shot awake, his arm instinctively clamping down against his side to protect himself from any further tickle attacks. He blinked, delirious, then saw you standing over him and frowned. “[Y/n]? What the fuck are you doing here?”
“I was hoping you’d know the answer to that,” you replied. “Last I remember we were at the bar, next thing I know I’m waking up in your bed without you in it.”
Alexander sat up, looking just as affronted by the light as you were, and he rubbed his temple.
“I don’t remember anything after the bar either,” he mumbled. “Why am I on the couch?”
“Dunno. I’d suggest you were a gentleman and insisted I took the bed, but from what I’ve learnt of you in the last day, you probably just collapsed on the sofa and I took the bed for myself.”
Alexander grunted, then yawned. “Ugh. Want some coffee?”
“If you’re offering.”
“‘Course I am. More of a gentleman than you seem to think.”
Alexander pushed himself up off the couch and shuffled off towards the kitchen, then paused halfway to pick something up from the armchair.
“This yours?”
He turned and offered you your own bra, and you blushed.
“Oh… yeah, I was wondering where that was.”
Alexander passed it to you without much thought, then continued his half-asleep trek to the kitchen, leaving you to wonder why the fuck your bra had been discarded on the armchair.
You quickly pulled off your top and set about putting your bra back on, trying to be quick before Alexander saw you, but of course by hurrying you fumbled more with the catch and it took you longer than you’d have liked before you finally got the straps over your shoulders and pulled your top back over your head.
“How do you like it?” Alexander asked when you entered the kitchen.
“Strong and black.”
“A woman after my own heart.”
You blushed again and sat yourself on a stool, looking around the kitchen, trying to remember something, anything, from your journey between the bar and Alexander’s bed.
“I vaguely recall offering you to stay at mine rather than get a taxi to your place alone,” Alexander said after a few moments. He was staring at the coffee maker as it boiled, as if his memories from last night were in there. “But after that, nothing until you attacked my armpit.”
“I don’t even remember that much. I think my memory ran out of storage about 2am.”
“So you remember karaoke then?”
You grinned. “Yes, I remember karaoke.”
“Mmph. Unfortunately so do I.”
Alexander poured you a hot cup of coffee, and when the first sip of the bitter drink passed your lips, you felt as if your soul had been renewed.
“That is the best thing I have ever tasted in the history of anything,” you sighed happily. “Both because I desperately need caffeine and because that’s a damn good coffee.”
“Some fancy stuff Gwen got me for Christmas,” Alexander said, leaning against the counter as he cradled his own cup like it was his salvation. “I don’t usually share it, so you should be honoured.”
You smiled. “It’s the greatest of honours.”
You were silent for a few minutes as you savoured your drinks, you trying to recall the previous night and he remembering small slivers of moments as his memory slowly came back to him.
He remembered coming back from the kitchen with a glass of water only to find you’d passed out on the sofa. He had tried to wake you, but you were out cold, so instead he hoisted you up and carried you to his bed. Exhaustion hit him, and he didn’t want to share a bed with you without your permission, so he relegated himself to the sofa instead.
That was all he remembered. How your bra had ended up on the armchair, he had no idea, because he was certain he’d dumped you on the bed fully dressed.
Once he’d managed to send you on your way, Alexander sat down at his computer and logged on to boot up the security programme. He had installed security cameras around his house in case of a break-in, not in case of lost drunken memories, but he absolutely had to know why your bra had made its way to the armchair.
He loaded the living room camera from the previous night and scrubbed through the footage until he saw the two of you walk in through the front door, then he slowed down and watched.
You came in first, followed by him, and - oh, god. His hand was down your trousers almost instantly. You looked very pleased with his actions, but you were clearly wasted - almost as soon as he left to fetch you some water, you sat down on the sofa and passed out.
Alexander watched as he carried you into the bedroom, then returned shortly after to pass out on the sofa himself. The armchair was still braless so he sped up the footage, until about an hour later when you appeared at the doorway.
He’d apparently not fallen asleep yet or was sleeping lightly, because you had only to say something to have him sitting up. You perched yourself on the arm of the armchair, the two of you exchanged words with each other - Alexander cursed himself for not having audio recording on this thing - and, to his own surprise, he stood up from the sofa, crossed the room in a few long strides, and his lips were on yours.
He watched himself sit on the chair and pull you onto his lap, and from the camera’s angle he could mostly just see your back, but it was plain that the two of you were kissing passionately. His arms wrapped around you and held you close, then grabbed the bottom of your shirt and pulled the whole thing over your head. You reached behind to unclasp your bra and threw it over the back of the armchair, where he’d find it later that morning.
Alexander sighed. What on earth had he been thinking?
Well, that was no question at all. His stupid, primal, drunk man brain had thought, Woman wants to fuck me. Dick wants to fuck woman. Must obey dick.
Never mind how young you were, or how drunk, or the fact that you were a bloody fan, probably just eager to tell your friends that you’d scored with Dr Lazarus.
He watched the screen anxiously, waiting for something to happen that he’d regret. He watched as you pulled away from the kiss to say something, and his horny, drunk self grinned excitedly.
Had he really fucked you and forgotten all about it?
On the screen, you said something else, and his past self paused. He said something, you replied, and he shook his head.
You seemed to protest, but he insisted and pushed you off his lap. You were apparently irritated, by the way that you grabbed your top and stormed off, leaving him to drag himself back to the sofa and fall back asleep, both of you leaving the bra behind on the armchair.
Alexander scrubbed through the footage just to be sure, but nothing else happened until you appeared hours later to wake him up.
He closed the footage and leant back in his chair with a sigh. He was relieved he’d apparently changed his mind about your drunken fumble, but now he had a conundrum. Should he tell you what the footage showed? Surely you too were wondering how the bra got there. Or did you know? You’d seemed just as confused as he was, and in fact seemed to not remember anything at all about coming back to his house. Or maybe you were just covering it up by pretending not to remember anything at all.
What would be the point in telling you? “Hey, [Y/n], I checked my cameras and we almost hooked up but apparently I changed my mind and sent you to bed. Just letting you know.”
If you knew, you might think it meant you had a chance with him. Alexander didn’t have anything against dating other actors, but he did have a strict rule about fans. He couldn’t possibly be with someone, whether for one night or long term, who just saw him as Dr Lazarus. Besides, if you liked the show, that clearly meant you had straw for brains, and he had higher standards than that.
No, he decided, it was best you didn’t know about that little fumble. On your next filming day, he would be nothing but professional, and any idea you might have of having a chance with him would quickly disappear.
---
Alexander’s version of “being professional” was to be even ruder to you than usual. You had no idea why he was being so abrasive, but he hardly spoke to you in the make-up room, chatting exclusively to Lena and giving you short, one or two word answers if he had to speak to you at all.
With no memory of the events on Friday, you could only conclude that Alexander just didn’t like you, though he didn’t seem to like anyone, so you tried not to take it personally. Even so, being rejected by your favourite actor for no apparent reason was soul-crushing to say the least.
You knew trying to talk to him and getting rebuffed would just upset you, so you decided to follow his lead and keep conversation to a minimum. While the cameras were rolling, you had an intense, uncertain relationship between your characters, but as soon as the cameras stopped, Alexander was back to ignoring you.
Even with his cold attitude towards you, you still managed to make the most of the experience, choosing to focus instead on the thrill of being on the Galaxy Quest set. Your character was in three episodes, arriving towards the end of your first episode, spending your second episode travelling with the crew, and in the third episode they dropped her off on a planet to settle down after her years in captivity.
The second episode was the most fun to film, because you got to be part of the crew for a while, and interacting with the other actors helped you forget Alexander’s permanent cold shoulder.
Just as you’d filmed your first scene first, you filmed your last scene last, and you travelled out on location for the scene, which was set on the planet of Atera.
Bethany said her goodbyes to the crew as they climbed aboard the ship to set off again, waiting on board as Lazarus stayed behind to speak to her alone.
“You’re sure you won’t come with us?” he asked. “There’s so much more to see out there.”
Bethany smiled sadly and nodded. “I’m sure. I need to figure out who I am outside of a cage before I go looking for adventure. But…”
She took his hand, which was soft again - did Alexander Dane moisturise?
“I’m very glad I met you, Lazarus. I thought I was alone in the universe, but… now I know you’re out there, I won’t feel so alone anymore.”
He looked at her searchingly, almost imploringly, as if looking for a last-minute way to convince her to stay.
“I’ll miss you,” Lazarus admitted.
“I’ll miss you too. Will you visit?”
“I want to… but we don’t often return where we’ve been.”
“Oh,” Bethany said sadly, glancing away, and your heart skipped a beat when Lazarus gently put an arm around her shoulder and pointed up at a constellation in the sky.
“That’s where we’re going. Always forward. So if you do miss me… just look up. That’s where I’ll be.”
Just look up. That’s where I’ll be. Alexander had been trying fruitlessly to convince Frank to take out that cheesy line, but it had been a losing battle.
Bethany craned her neck to look into the sky, then turned to look at Alexander next to her.
“Thank you for saving me.”
Lazarus looked down at her.
“My dear, I think you may well have saved me.”
Bethany kissed his cheek and smiled sweetly. Lazarus hesitated, but he let her go and made his way to the ship.
She waved him off, and when cut was called, you thought it curious how familiar kissing Alexander on the cheek felt, as if it were something you were completely comfortable with.
Perhaps you were getting too into character.
---
You were admittedly disappointed with how unceremoniously you left the studio. You had your cap removed in the usual awkward silence with Alexander, who just grunted at you when you said goodbye.
In the theatre, you knew straight away how people felt about your performance. You’d sometimes hear reactions in the moment; otherwise, you’d receive (or not) applause at the end, and reviews were online and in the papers the very next day.
Television was different. You had signed an NDA banning you from sharing details of your character or the storyline you’d been involved in. And the episode wouldn’t air for months, so you had no way of knowing how your performance would be received.
The other strange thing was that you could watch your own performance on TV along with everyone else.
Over the months since your week on set, you’d found a role as an understudy in a production of Sweeney Todd, and in between rehearsing for three different roles and occasionally even getting to perform them, you’d made some good friends with cast and crew members, all of whom supported one another’s various attempts to make a career in LA.
So when the day came that your first episode would air, you had your friends over to watch your episode with you, many of them also fans of the show, or if not they came anyway simply to support you.
You didn’t appear until the very end of the episode, Bethany’s getaway into the Protector with Lazarus and the rest of the crew acting as cliffhanger, but it was still an incredible experience to watch yourself, in full prosthetics, acting in Galaxy Quest with Alexander Dane - who, despite being a complete jackass, was still your favourite actor.
“Oh my god, I so ship them!” your friend Stephanie, who played Johanna, crooned as soon as the credits rolled. “[Y/n], please tell me you and Lazarus get together!”
“I can’t tell you what happens, you know that!” you replied, throwing your hands up in innocence. “By pain of death. Or, well, by pain of a big payment if I was responsible for any leaks, and I can not afford that.”
“Eiw, did you have to kiss Alexander Dane though?” Stephanie gagged.
“What do you mean, eiw?”
“He’s ancient!”
“He’s not! He’s 53.”
“Don’t bother, Steph, [Y/n]'s in lurrrrve with Alexander Dane,” scoffed Mike from costume, who’d found out about your crush when you’d bonded over a shared love of Galaxy Quest while he fitted you for your Mrs Lovett costume.
“I am not! I’ll have you know he was really rude to me all week we worked together. Hardly said a word to me. He’ll always be my favourite actor, but as a person? Hard pass.”
Perhaps that pass would be hard, because as it turned out, the fans loved your character. So much so that you were invited as a late addition guest at the Galaxy Quest convention in LA two weeks after your third and final episode had aired.
You gladly accepted - you were going to go anyway as an attendee, but as a guest? That was a much better option. You gave your ticket to Mike, who almost cried with jealousy that you were being invited as a guest.
You’d never been to the convention yourself before, as it was always in LA and you’d always lived in London, but you’d always followed the posts about it online, and you knew that the actors always went in their costumes, including Alexander wearing his cap. Would you be expected to do the same? You didn’t even have your costume anymore.
You arrived at the hotel on the Friday night and checked into the room you’d been given. The guests all had rooms on one floor, separated from fans, and your room was right at the end of the corridor - no doubt the last room available as you were invited so last minute.
You’d hardly begun to unpack your suitcase when you heard a knock on the door.
You opened it, your anxiety telling you that someone was about to tell you there’d been a mix up and you weren’t invited at all, but to your relief you recognised Lena, the make-up artist.
“There she is! Thought I’d bring this over and make sure you still fit.”
She held up a coat bag, no doubt containing your costume.
“You do costume now too?” you joked as you stepped aside to let her in.
“I do at things like this - cheaper for them to send me out on my own. Have you gained or lost any weight since filming?”
“Uh - I guess I might have lost some,” you said. “I don’t really keep an eye on it. But I’ve been doing a show so that keeps me in shape.”
“Ooh, which show you in?” Lena asked, and you told her about your time understudying in Sweeney Todd while she got you out of your clothes and into your costume.
“Aw, I’d love to see you in it some time! But I suppose you never know when you’ll be on, do you? That must be so hard learning all three roles. Gosh, look at you, you have lost weight! If we were filming I’d take the waist in a bit, but since we’re just here for the con, we can get away with it.”
“Am I gonna have to wear the head thing? I know Alexander always wears his.”
Lena scoffed. “Yeah, only to lower the risk of Galaxy Quest fans recognising him outside of the show. I got it with me if you want, but you don’t have to.”
You bit your lip and thought about it. You really didn’t want to wear it, but if Alexander was wearing his, you kind of felt like you should, in solidarity.
Then again, he didn’t care about your feelings, so why should you care about his?
“May I make a suggestion?” Lena asked.
“Absolutely not, you lowly make-up artist,” you scoffed.
Lena laughed. “You should wear it. Everyone’s still buzzing about Bethany, and since you’re so new to the scene people won’t recognise you without it yet. And it’ll be super cute if you and Alexander both wear it for your photo session! Here, let’s get you out of the costume for now, I’ll come back tomorrow to put it on you proper.”
“What photo session?” you asked as you turned around to let Lena take the costume apart.
“Haven’t you seen your schedule yet?”
“I had literally been here for five seconds when you knocked on the door. I haven’t even had a piss yet, let alone looked at my timetable.”
“You and Alexander have a double photo session in the afternoon. People pay $30 each for photos with you individually, or $50 for a pic with both of you.”
“Oh, bloody hell,” you sighed.
“That’s what he said too.”
“I’m surprised he even agreed to do it. He hates sharing the spotlight - although I suppose he doesn’t feel threatened by me. Still, I’m surprised he’d agree to spend any more time in my presence than he has to.”
“He doesn’t hate you, you know,” Lena told you as you stepped out of the costume and gratefully began putting your far more comfortable, human clothes on. “He’s just a miserable bastard. He quite likes you, actually.”
You scoffed.
“He hardly spoke to me all week during filming.”
“Maybe, but after you went home each day, he’d tell me how well you did in your scenes that day. And Gwen tells me he spoke highly of your performance after your episodes aired.”
“I’m surprised he watches the show.”
“He loves to watch himself. Right, that’s me done with you for tonight. The intro panel’s at 9 and I’ve gotta get Alexander’s cap on too, so I can come by at 7.30 with some breakfast and coffee to wake you up while I get you fitted. Sound good?”
“So long as the coffee’s strong and black, you can do anything you want to me.”
“Flirt.”
Lena winked at you and left, and with the promise of a 7.30 alien head thing fitting, you decided to get an early night.
---
No amount of black coffee could have prepared you for the convention.
You were shuffled through back corridors to behind the main stage at 8.45, where you found most of the main cast were waiting, all dressed in their costumes.
“Hey, it’s [Y/n]!” Guy said cheerily when he saw you. “Man, am I glad you’re here. This is my first con too, and I’m bricking it. I’ve been to loads before as a fan, obviously, but never as a guest. I’m so nervous!”
“Oh, er, me too,” you replied, a little taken aback by Guy’s enthusiasm so early in the morning. You glanced over at the others, and noticed one body missing. “Hey, where’s Jason?”
“Running late, of course,” grunted Alexander from the chair he was slouched in, looking as miserable as ever. “He’ll show up ten minutes late on purpose, all to get that extra round of applause.”
He didn’t even look up at you to say hello.
You turned to Guy.
“Hey, when they introduce us, d’you think we could go on at the same time? Then we can power through that terrifying first entrance together. I’m terrified of walking on stage after everyone else and getting crickets chirping.”
“Oh my god, me too!” Guy said with relief. “I’m so glad you said it. Yes, let’s do it.”
Alexander snorted derisively. “What, are you scared of walking on a stage?”
”This is a little different from a theatre show,” you retorted. “In the theatre, they applaud at the end, and they applaud based on your performance. Here they’re applauding us as people, and none of them know me. Or has it been so long you forgot what theatre bows are like?”
Alexander did look at you then, his eyes narrowed, as the others chortled at your dig.
“Remind me why she’s here?” he grumbled to no one in particular.
“Because we got about 200 emails last week asking if she’d be here,” replied the convention host, who decided now was a convenient time to walk in. “Right, you guys ready to go?”
The convention passed in a whirlwind. You were hurried from panel to signing to meet and greet with hardly a chance to breathe. You met hundreds of fans, whose names you scribbled alongside your signature then promptly forgot, and you took every chance you had to remind the fans you were talking to that you were one of them.
In the afternoon came your photo session with Alexander, and finally you got a moment of peace when you entered the room ten minutes before the fans were to be let in - although, you suspected, they were already lining up outside.
While the crew got the backdrop ready, you collapsed into a chair with a sigh of relief.
“You still have a day and a half to go, you know,” said a familiar voice.
You looked up to see Alexander leaning up against the wall, looking at you with amusement.
“I didn’t think so many people would want to see me,” you said honestly. “Sure I didn’t have a line like you guys had, but mine still didn’t stop. I think I’ve met more people this morning than I have in my entire life.
Alexander scoffed. “Yep, and they’ll be back tomorrow, expecting you to remember them all individually.”
“How many have asked you to say that line?”
“Too fucking many. How many have asked if you’re coming back?”
“Pretty much everyone.”
“What have you been telling them?”
“That Alexander Dane’s a twat and will probably refuse to work with me again.”
He laughed, but he didn’t deny it. He sighed, then came to sit by you.
“Look, I know I’m a twat. I’ll try to make this tolerable for you.”
“Gee, thanks. No one’s forcing you to do this with me. Couldn’t you have just said you didn’t wanna do a double shoot?”
“Actually… it was my idea.”
Now that surprised you. You looked at him questioningly, and he sighed.
“Look, Gwen always hates these things, alright? Blokes are always trying to touch her. It happens less when a man is there, as stupid as that is, so Jason or I usually do a double shoot with her.”
“And you thought they might do the same with me?”
Alexander shrugged. “Sure, why not? These basement dwellers don’t know how to act around a woman - add the fact you’re gorgeous and all hope is lost. So let me know if you’re uncomfortable, alright?”
You nodded, hoping Lena had caked you in enough make-up to hide your blush at the fact he’d called you gorgeous.
As it turned out, Alexander was right - fans really did have wandering hands. After the third narrowly avoided grope, you pulled Alexander aside before the next fan stepped up.
“Alex, that’s three guys who’ve tried to grab my arse already,” you whispered. “What do I do?”
“What? Who?”
Alexander looked around as if the groping fans might still be lingering, but they’d long been ushered away by event staff.
“I told you, [Y/n], you need to tell me when it happens.”
“What am I supposed to do? Shout ‘hey, everybody, this guy’s grabbing my arse’? That’s so embarrassing.”
Alexander thought for a moment.
“Alright, when it happens, you poke me with two fingers. I’ll pretend I noticed it myself.”
“Oh, planning non-verbal cues already, are we?” you joked, the words out of your mouth before you could stop yourself.
He snorted and rolled his eyes.
“Trust me, [Y/n] - if we fucked, I’d make sure you were very vocal.”
Your cheeks burned for the second time in that hour, but you had to push your sudden explicit thought about Alexander to the side, because you had two more hours to go of this torture.
Most of it went by without any more unwanted groping, but you were nearly at the end of the queue when one ball of sweat dressed in a very poorly made copy of Alexander’s costume placed his hand firmly on your rear.
You froze for a moment, then remembered to poke Alexander with two fingers. His head immediately whipped around and he looked down to see the fan’s hand far lower than it should be.
Alexander may be grumpy all the time, but there was a difference between grump and anger. He was never really angry unless he was acting - but he certainly wasn’t acting now.
You were fairly certain you didn’t even know half the swear words that came out of his mouth as he yelled at the fan. A brave staff member tried to intervene, but Alexander simply turned his vitriol to them, yelling at them for not making the event safer for female guests.
He ended his rant by ushering you along with him as he stormed out, and you felt a mixture of emotions - relief to be out of there, guilt for the fans still in line, and a bit (okay, maybe a lot) of arousal at Alexander defending you.
“Prats,” he cursed bitterly as the door closed behind you, leaving the two of you alone in the corridor. He turned to you. “Are you alright?”
“Yeah, I’m fine,” you replied awkwardly, not really sure if you were being honest. “Thanks for, um, rescuing me.”
Alexander pursed his lips, his nostrils flaring as he shot a dark look back at the door.
“You got anything else on this afternoon?” he asked you.
“No, that was my last thing.”
“Do you want to go back to my room and raid the minibar? I usually get pissed on the agency’s credit card alone, but I guess you wouldn’t be the worst company.”
“That almost sounded like a compliment.”
“Make the most of it. Come on, I know a way upstairs we can go to avoid being seen.”
Alexander led you up to the floor you were all staying on, and you were halfway down the corridor to his room when your path was suddenly intercepted by Jane Doe, one of the new cast members for the reboot.
“Hello!” she announced cheerily, grinning at you both.
“Lal - er, Jane, what are you doing here?” Alexander said with confusion. “I thought you couldn’t make it this weekend.”
“It is my birthing day! We are having a party. You are coming too.”
Alexander glanced at you. “Oh - er - we’ll miss this one, actually. But happy… birthing day.”
He tried to step around her, but she simply followed his path, still grinning.
Apparently she was as strange as her character.
“You are coming!” Jane insisted.
She held something up in her hand and pressed a button, and your world went black.
104 notes · View notes
maxespurr · 11 months ago
Text
While We're Alone
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Warning: Smut (it's just fingering in the kitchen lol) ,18+ Only, MINORS DO NOT INTERACT
Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Natasha Romanoff
Summary: Natasha comes over to the Maximoff household to pick up Wanda and the boys. While Billy and Tommy get ready upstairs, Natasha is unable to keep her hands to herself and Wanda is unable to resist.
Set on Earth-838
Words: 1012
A/N: This fic features the same 838-WandNat from my other fic Disconnect but with less angst :) A holiday fic if you squint hard enough.
---
"Mom! Auntie Nat is here!"
Wanda turned around to face her boys who were preoccupied with squeezing the life out of Natasha, the sight bringing a smile to her face. "Natasha! Perfect timing. I just finished baking all the pies," she greeted while untying her apron and hanging it up. She eyed the older woman's outfit for the evening and involuntarily swallowed when she found Natasha handsome in a black blazer and white hoodie and tight denim jeans.
It was a killer combo that made Wanda weak.
Natasha noticed the way Wanda was staring at her and smirked. She'd be lying to herself if she didn't find Wanda's domestic look attractive. The brunette's hair was tight up in a messy bun with some strands fallen out of place while the sleeves of a familiarr red and black checkered flannel were rolled up to her elbows. "Three pies? You really outdid yourself," she commented while Wanda packed the pies into their own individual cardboard box.
"Well, the holiday gathering is going to be bigger than last year from what Dr. Richards told me." Wanda looked down at her pies proudly then turned to her boys. "Billy. Tommy. It's time to get ready."
"Okaaaaay," Billy answered obediently and headed to the foot of the stairs.
"Mom, can I bring my Switch to the party?" Tommy looked up at her with puppy eyes.
Wanda gave him a playful, light knock on the head before planting a kiss on his forehead. "No, but if you behave at the party, I can ask Dr. Richards if you and Billy can play in the VR room."
Tommy's eyes brightened and cheered with a loud 'whoo!' before dashing up the stairs after his brother.
Wanda chuckled then began placing all her pans into the sink to let them soak. She felt Natasha follow after her and could already feel the redhead had something up her sleeves.
"Need help with anything?" Natasha offered, nodding towards the pile of dishes. Wanda shook her head.
"I spent all afternoon baking. I'll worry about washing tomorrow. But you can help with something else," Wanda proposed as she pressed herself against Natasha, a hand slipping to gently grasp the back of the older woman's neck to guide her closer for a kiss. She could feel Natasha smirk against her lips as they kissed and shuddered when wandering hands settled on her hips.
"By the way, is that my flannel?"
This time it was Wanda's turn to smirk. "It's mine now. You left it here last time you were over. It's very comfortable so I don't have any plans on giving it back."
Natasha pulled away slightly and clicked her tongue. "Is that so?"
"It is so. I'm sure you don't have a problem with that since it's not the first time you've let me have your-- Natasha!" Wanda hissed when she realized Natasha unbuttoned her jeans with a hand already slipping beneath her underwear. She whimpered when she felt fingers already toying with her clit. "Don't...! The boys are upstairs, and I still need to get ready!" Wanda bit down on her lower lip when Natasha slid a finger inside of her, failing to stifle her moans.
Natasha hummed, clearly unbothered as she slipped another finger inside of Wanda, the latter gasping and one hand clutching at her jacket. "I guess I'll have to make this quick," she remarked then leaned into Wanda's ear to whisper. "Shouldn't take long since you were already soaked before I touched you. Were you expecting this?" Wanda whined in response, which Natasha took as a yes and found incredibly cute, making her want to ruin Wanda more.
Wanda's free hand gripped the kitchen counter tightly when she felt Natasha pumping her fingers even faster. She no longer had control of her body, with her lips parted and clear moans spilling out as Natasha drove her over the edge. It was when the spy's deft fingers pulled out of her to rub at her clit that Wanda finally came, shuddering violently against the older woman. Her hips twitched involuntarily when Natsha pulled out and felt another throb between her legs as she watched Natasha tasted her from her fingers. Both knew there was no time for another round, but Wanda relaxed against the other woman feeling spent but content.
"Next time, let me take you out for a weekend. Just the two of us. I'll take you out for dinner and we can explore the city," Natasha brought up suddenly, her clean hand affectionately combing through Wanda's hair. Wanda had never seen the former Avenger looked so nervous before. "I... want you to know I'm serious about you. You and the boys."
Wanda couldn't stop herself from smiling, her heart swelling with happiness. "Maybe for New Years?"
"But what about Billy and Tommy?"
"I'll ask Maria if they could celebrate at her place" she proposed. "It's been a while since the boys have played with Monica, so I'm sure they'd be excited to see her."
"You're sure?" Natasha asked again. Wanda chuckled in amusement and leaned in to kiss the spy's cheek.
"I'm sure. After all, I'm serious about you too, Natasha Romanoff."
Wanda managed to sneak off into her bedroom before her boys found her in her disheveled state. When she stood at the top of the stairs, Billy and Tommy were talking animatedly about what VR game they wanted to play later while Natasha cooly tucked her hands into the pockets of her blazer. Wanda was wearing the faux red wool coat that Natasha gifted her for her birthday this year, and she smiled when she saw Natasha's expression brightened at the fact she was wearing the coat.
Natasha offered to drive them. The boys eagerly helped carry the pies into her sports car. Once Wanda locked the front door, she saw the way Natasha adored Billy and Tommy and the way her boys looked up at her with equal adoration.
Wanda couldn't help but feel how lucky she was to have those three in her life.
---
A/N: Thank you for reading and happy holidays :)
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misseviehyde · 1 year ago
Text
A HYDING TO NOTHING
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CHAPTER 1
“So is that stuff you told me about your great grandfather being Henry Jekyll really true?” I asked my best mate Richard as we sat in his room doing homework one night.
“Shut up!” he hissed, “I only told you about that because we have been friends so long and you got me drunk on my Dad’s Scotch. If he ever finds out I blabbed the family secret he will go ape shit.”
“But is that stuff about the Elixir really true? Does it really make you into a girl?”
“How should I know? I never tried it,” he snapped glaring at me. “We guard it because it’s dangerous to use. The only reason we even keep any of it in the house is in case anyone else ever invents it and we need to work out a cure. It’s a solemn duty passed down from Father to Son”
“Awwww come on,” I grinned. “You really haven’t considered trying it? Just think of what you could do as a girl…”
Putting down the book Richard looked at me in exasperation, “It has honestly never crossed my mind. You obviously have been thinking about it since I told you though. What’s on your mind exactly?”
“You know that hot girl I like Abby? She is at the beach today, but she won’t look at a nerd like me twice. But you know what I noticed? Hot girls listen to other girls. I was thinking you could take the Elixir and go tell her how great I am. She is sure to be interested in me then. It would only be for a few hours. Your Dad would never know.”
Richard shook his head angrily, “You must be nuts. My Dad has made it quite clear that I am never to go near the stuff except in an emergency.”
“Dude… this is an emergency! I am sick of being a virgin and I need to get laid. It will only be for a few hours. What harm could it really do? Besides you owe me for saving your life.”
Richard rolled his eyes, “That was six years ago and you still go on about it every time you want something. That car wasn’t even going that fast!”
I looked at him steadily in the eye. “Dude, please do this. I wanna see the Elixir in action and I wanna be with Abby so badly. Pleeeeeeaase!!!?”
“Fine!” Snapped Richard. “God you are annoying. A very small controlled dose shouldn’t be too dangerous. Follow me then.”
Having finally made up his mind, Richard was now firm and decisive. He led me into his Dad’s study and walking up to the bookcase pulled on a whorl of decorative wood I had never noticed before. It clicked and the bookcase swung open to reveal a small chamber.
Inside were dusty books - the fabled research diaries of Dr Jekyll. There were two chemistry sets, one old fashioned and one modern. And in a sealed aluminium casket were five carefully packaged test-tubes containing a light pink liquid.
Consulting one of the books first, Richard made some notes. “A single drop will transform me for about three hours and should not lead to a polymorphic imbalance.”
“A what?”
“Basically if you are ever stupid enough to drink a whole vial, it becomes a semi permanent effect. You start switching between male and female forms at random moments… even without taking more Elixir. It is what happened to my great grandfather. A single drop is safe enough though and the effects are temporary.”
Putting a pipette into the tube, Richard extracted a drop and raised it to his mouth. Then he hesitated and licked his lips nervously. “I don’t know about this… maybe it is a…”
Before he could react I squeezed the pipette bulb and a big pink drop glooped out and went straight into his mouth. Richard looked at me furiously and then shrugged fatalistically “Oh well… too late now I guess.”
I watched excitedly… but nothing happened. “Dude it isn’t working, I knew it was fake,” I hissed disappointingly.
“Be patient,” he sighed. “A small dose like this takes time to kick in. Besides… have you seen my hair? I can feel it tingling so something must be happening.”
I looked at Richard and gasped. He was right. As I watched his hair was lightening and growing blonder by the second. It was now strawberry blonde and the tips had started to curl and push out.
“Oh shit - here I go,” he groaned suddenly gripping his stomach and doubling up. I felt the grin fade from my face as I heard his bones cracking and wet fleshy sounds emerging from his body as he gripped himself and hunched down.
“Holy shit dude - I would never have made you take this stuff if I had thought it was gonna harm you…” I cried running to his side.
“Ahhhh no.. nooooo it’s okay… it feels wonderful!” laughed Richard suddenly throwing back his head with an ecstatic giggle and I could see his teeth bared in a rictus of pleasure as his skin softened and shifted across his face.
“Oooh I can feel myself getting girlier by the moment and it feels awesome,” he purred… his deep voice suddenly unbreaking and rising several octaves as his adam's apple sucked in and his arms and legs grew thinner. He was visibly shorter and slimmer now and his hair had continued to grow, now hanging down past his shoulders in a soft blonde wave.
“Mmmmmh Dad lied to me… he never told me it would feel this nice to transform,” murmured Richard as his features softened and his new bee stung lips curved into a dreamy smile. I could see that the front of his oversized t shirt was now bulging slightly with his perky breasts and there were definite curves going on that were making me a little turned on to be honest.
The changes began to slow and Richard stood up, his trousers dropping from his tiny waist to reveal a pair of smooth tanned legs and dainty feet. His waist was tiny, but with curvy hips and his tummy soft and flat as a washboard. Luckily his boxer shorts stayed up - but it was pretty clear there was no bulge inside and he was now flat fronted. He was all girl now.
“I think it’s over,” muttered Richard in amazement as he examined himself and brushed his long blonde hair out of his eyes. “It isn’t anything like my Dad said - I feel wonderful… why would he not want to try this? Maybe he secretly has and he is just jealous to share the power. Well too bad because now I am getting a taste and I think I like it!”
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I was now looking at a very cute and attractive girl about my own age, with a slim perky figure… a nice pair of tits and a soft pert backside. She had clear blue, and slightly mischievous eyes and was a blonde beach stunner from her tiny toes up to her pretty little nose.
“You are beautiful!’ I gasped admiringly.
“Well of course I am you idiot,” retorted the girl in front of me, “My grandfather designed this stuff to try and perfect the human form. It was supposed to bring out all the best qualities in a person , but he couldn’t get it to work for his gender. It always makes people into girls. Guess the male form is inferior or something. Gawd you really are dumb sometimes. I told you all this when I first mentioned it. Oh and you can stop looking at me like that you perv…”
“Sorry Richard, you gotta remember I only found out about all this recently.” I said, reluctantly tearing my eyes off my friends cute body as she played with her new hair and tried to make it sit how she wanted.
“You better call me Riley,” she muttered brusquely. “It’s my middle name, but I can’t go by Richard anymore. If Dad hears you call me Richard he will work it out. I always hated it, thought it sounded too girly… but it sounds kinda cute now. Guess it is finally gonna come in handy.”
She finished fussing with her hair… it looked kinda good actually.“Well? What now?” She asked.
“I guess we go to the beach to find Abby,”
“Are you being especially dumb today or something?” Scoffed Riley as she rolled her blue eyes. “I can’t go anywhere without some clothes and makeup. No one is gonna believe I am a real teenage girl dressed like this!”
“Oh… I guess you are right,” I sheepishly shrugged. “Erm but how do we do that?”
“Jesus! This is supposed to be your plan… do I have to think of everything? Fine… we go to the mall. I can get one of those women in the makeup bit to give me a makeover. And we can buy me some clothes. But you are paying.”
“Fine,” I shrugged.
Riley pulled Richard’s biggest t shirt on so it went down to her knees. Then, hunkering down in the passenger seat of my car to avoid close observation I drove her to the mall.
As we walked through the crowds she carefully observed what the other girls our age were buying and wearing and then pulled me into the shops she was interested in. Then she would make me pay for what she wanted. Boy was Riley bossy… I found it hard to say no to her.
“This is crazy,” I muttered an hour later as I stood in the women's clothing section of another teenage fashion shop and watched Riley flicking through the racks. She had already been for her makeover, had her nails done and already picked three different outfits and two pairs of shoes to wear. How many did she need?
“My allowance is all used up, so this is your last outfit.” I angrily told her. She just stuck her tongue out at me and deliberately grabbed a load of jewellery from a stand to stick on top of her purchases. I gritted my teeth. It had taken me months to save up $300 and Riley had just blown all of it!
“I’d like to wear these out… can I go change please?” She smiled sweetly at the cashier and I had to wait another twenty minutes in the car outside as she faffed about in the changing rooms.
Eventually she emerged and I had to admit she looked good. She had a tight pair of blue jeans on and a grey crop top tied up to show off her sexy waist. But what had taken so long?
“I have my swimming costume on underneath,” she grinned. “Sorry it took me so long. It was my first chance to check out my new body in private. We better get a move on… we only have about an hour and twenty before I change back. Let's go find Abby huh?”
This wasn’t working out quite how I had planned but now things could get back on track. With Riley in the seat next to me, I pushed the accelerator and we headed for the beach.
CHAPTER 2:
We drove to the beach, Riley’s feet up on my dash as she played on Richard’s phone and took what seemed like thousands of selfies.
“Get your feet down off there,” I scolded her, “What are you doing anyway?”
“Gawd you are like such a grouch today,” she whined, sullenly putting her feet down. “I’m just taking a few hot pics for Richard to enjoy later.”
“You talk like he is a different person to you,” I scowled. Riley smiled cheekily, stuck her tongue out at me and simply carried on. I wanted to ignore her, but it was hard. She was so fucking hot and I was sure I saw her smile every time I checked her out.
A short drive later and we finally pulled up at the beach and made our way down onto the sand. I could already see Abby relaxing by the water. She was wearing a sexy purple bikini top and was by far the hottest girl on the beach. God I wanted her so badly. Hopefully this would work.
I turned to speak to my friend and my mouth dropped open as all thoughts of Abby were banished from my mind. Riley had pulled off her jeans and top and I gawped at the incredible body she had underneath. Suddenly it was like Abby was the moon and Riley was the sun blotting her out.
Riley looked absolutely amazing in a sexy bikini set. Her blonde hair blew sexily in the wind and I could barely pull my eyes away from her amazing tits all pushed up and out for all the boys to see. She smiled at me and blew me a kiss. “Leave this to me hot stuff…”
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I sat on my towel and watched as she walked over to Abby. The two of them began to chat and after a while, whisper conspiratorially to each other. Their conversation seemed to be going on for ages.
Then suddenly my heart beat in my chest as they began to look in my direction. I was hopeful it was working until Abby started to laugh. I couldn’t hear what they were saying exactly, but the two of them were in fits of giggles and I felt myself redden with embarrassment.
Anger surged inside me as Riley sauntered slowly back over and began putting her clothes back on. “She says… no chance. Now drive me home.”
What had just happened?
We drove for a bit until finally I couldn’t take it anymore. I pulled over on a deserted bit of road and turned angrily to Riley. “What did you say to her?”
Riley giggled and smiled maliciously at me. “You want the truth? Okay. I told her we used to date. I told her you have a tiny cock and I told her you always ejaculated your pants before I could even get your cock out of your boxers, which is why we broke up. I have never laughed so hard, we really bonded over how pathetic you are.”
My mouth dropped open and I wanted to scream. “Why would you do something so mean and cruel you bitch?”
Riley shivered… to my horror it looked like a shiver of pleasure. “Bitch… oh fuck, call me that again will you… I love how that sounds. ”
“Are you insane? You are my friend… why would you do this to me?”
“I dunno,” purred Riley. “I’ve never been cruel before. It felt good so I did it. It made me feel so powerful and hot to destroy your chances with Abby and lie. I enjoyed being… being… ohhhh yes… being a bitch.” She looked almost orgasmic as she shivered in pleasure again.
Then suddenly her whole demeanour shifted. It was as if she realised she was revealing too much of herself and a guarded expression came over her face. She quickly shifted gear again and looked deep into my eyes with her sexy blue gaze. Now she looked innocent and vulnerable.
“Look I’m sorry. I know it was wrong for me to do what I did. Forget what I just said… the truth is… I was jealous of Abby. I only told her that stuff because you are too good for her. Believe me you can do better than her.”
“But there are no other girls I want. Damn it Riley, now I will never get laid!”
“Oh yeah? Says who?” purred Riley suddenly moving uncomfortably close to me. “Since I transformed I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you. I think this Elixir has totally changed my sexuality. I think I am attracted to boys and girls now. And guess what? You’re a boy and I’m a girl… here we are on this deserted street and no one is around. Who knows what could happen?”
“But you’re really a boy too… you’re Richard” I whimpered as my sexy best friend got close enough for me to smell her perfume. All anger and thoughts of the mean things Riley had just done were starting to fade now, replaced by more primal urges.
“Do I look like a boy to you? I’m a girl now baby and I love it. Forget about Richard, I’m Riley now and I want you.”
She was so close now her blonde hair was nearly touching mine. She was so pretty. I felt my heart hammering in my chest… I had never felt so alive.
Then suddenly we were kissing and her tongue was in my mouth. God but she was an amazing kisser. I felt Riley’s hand trail down my chest and fall onto my lap, the suddenly she began to pop the buttons on my jeans.
“No wait… we shouldn’t do this,” I gasped breaking off the kiss.
“Shhhhhh, I want… your… cock…” giggled Riley her eyes burning with lust as her hand snaked into my underwear and I groaned helplessly as I felt her hand wrap round my dick.
I was hers now and I gave up any pretence at resistance as she yanked my dick out of my jeans then bent her blonde head over and started sucking my cock.
“Oooooh fuck!” I gasped as my best friends wet pink lips wrapped tightly round my throbbing cock. I tried to banish images of Richard from my mind and instead concentrate on Riley. It wasn’t hard…
I knew this must be her first cock, but she didn’t act nervously or anything. Her hand snaked to the base of my dick and pumped the shaft whilst her mouth and tongue kissed the tip. She angled her head to make eye contact, sucking almost sideways so I could look at her beautiful face.
It was all too much - “Ooooh I’m gonna ahhhhh cum,” I gasped and suddenly Riley’s entire head was engulfing my cock as she sucked hard and I started to orgasm.
I felt my cum flow into her mouth, but she just kept sucking till the orgasm was over. Then with a wet slurping gasp she disengaged and sat up giggling.
“There… that wasn’t so bad was it?”
“You… you swallowed it all?” I queried.
“Mmmmh of course I did. Who’d have figured cum tasted so good? Abby told me she hates it, so she always spits… I guess some girls are just naturally sluttier than others…”
I goggled at Riley, her cheeks still flushed… she looked so wanton. “Abby?”
“Yeah… we didn’t just talk about your ‘tiny cock.’ She gave me advice on how to do a great blowjob too. I think she and I are gonna be good friends. Did you enjoy that? Not bad for a first effort hey? Mmmh I can’t wait to for my second attempt… oh and to try other things too.”
I felt myself getting hard as Riley suggestively spread her legs apart slightly and lightly brushed her hand down her top against her tits. She bit her pink lip and groaned. “You wanna fuck me?”
I was instantly hard again and my throat was dry as I nodded. I had never wanted anything so much…
Riley smiled and her hand went to her fly. This was really happening… I was finally going to lose my virginity to my best friend and I couldn’t wait.
Then suddenly her hand trembled and she squirmed uncomfortably in the seat. Then a stomach cramp hit her and she groaned and doubled up in her seat. “Ahhhhh… nooooooo…. damn you Richard, not nooooooow!”
“What’s wrong?” I gasped.
“Ahhhh the Elixir is uuuuh wearing off, I’m turning back into a boy. Get me home quick!”
I hit the accelerator and we sped off, Riley groaning and moaning in the seat next to me. Her blonde hair was darkening and the seams of her clothes were stretching and bursting as her face twisted and changed
I pulled up outside her house and she scrambled out of the car staggering up the steps and into the house. I quickly followed into Richard’s bedroom where Riley was desperately pulling off her clothes.
As she ripped off her top and bra, I was afforded a brief glimpse of a perfect pair of wet dream inducing tits… before they suddenly deflated and sank into her body. A light dusting of hair appeared across her body as muscle piled up and her small slender body began taking back on masculine proportions.
Riley ripped off her jeans and I looked away embarrassed as I caught a brief glimpse of a tiny dick between her legs starting to swell and grow. Her voice was breaking and she threw back her head with a groan as her features morphed back into Richard’s and his body stabilized
“Ohhhh fuck, what a rush” he mumbled dizzily staggering towards his bed and then with a sigh collapsing onto it.
I ran over, but he was already snoring… the transformation back into his usual self leaving him virtually comatose and completely drained.
I tidied up Riley’s clothes… my hands lingering for a moment on her bra and panties… then I hid them under the bed. Pulling the cover over my friend, I couldn’t believe moments ago this had been the hot blonde girl who had sucked my dick.
If only the Elixir had lasted a little longer then I could have finally lost my virginity. I wanted Riley so badly, all thoughts of Abby were gone. I wanted to bury myself in her body and feel her moan as I fucked her. I needed her.
Picking up my friends phone I transferred the pictures of Riley she had taken in my car earlier that day to my own phone and left him to sleep off his transformation.
As I looked at the pictures of the smirking blonde hottie on my phone I felt my cock twitch. Fuck, I was gonna jerk off so much to these photos. I felt like Riley had entered my soul and possessed my senses… I needed her so badly now. I almost seemed to hear her voice giggling in my ear.
Something told me I hadn’t seen the last of Riley yet…
CHAPTER 3
I awoke from a hot steamy dream about Riley sucking me off to a massive morning hard-on and the buzzing of my phone near my ear. It was Sunday and it was 9am… I must have slept right through.
I picked up my mobile and blearily looked at the screen. It was Richard.
I hesitated… this was a conversation I had been dreading. Now that he was back to being a boy, how would we ever go back to our normal relationship after he had sucked my cock?
On the other hand I couldn’t ignore him forever, I decided I better answer it.
“Hello?”
Richard answered… he sounded tired. “Ugggh it’s me. My head is still pounding. Dude, what happened yesterday? I woke up passed out on my bed with makeup all over my face. Did you get with Abby? Did it work?”
“You mean you don’t remember?”
“Maybe something. Just flashes. It all goes a bit blurry. I remember going shopping… I remember going to the beach… then it gets really hard. After that it's just feelings of pleasure and euphoria. It is like being high on drugs and drunk at the same time, it feels so amazing but like you can’t quite remember the details the next day.”
My heart skipped a beat. Richard didn’t remember… he would never know that he had sucked me off OR that we had nearly had sex. I didn’t know if that was a good or a bad thing.
“Look I’ll come over and we can talk about it,” I coughed, standing up and looking for my things.
“Okay… see you in a bit.”
I hung up and before I put my phone away I briefly flicked through my pics of Riley and felt my dick twitch longingly. She was so pretty… it was a shame I would probably never see her again.
I arrived at Richard’s house and went inside. I found him in his bedroom in a dressing gown rooting through the many bags of shopping I had hidden under his bed. His face was pink and his hair damp, he had obviously had to scrub hard to remove Riley’s makeup.
He was holding a skimpy g string and looking at it in a sort of sick fascination as I entered. Seeing me he instantly reddened and dropped it back into the bag.
“I don’t see why you are embarrassed… you could have fit into those perfectly yesterday,” I laughed.
“Not funny,” he grunted sullenly. “What the hell dude, why did you let me buy all this stuff? There are about eight outfits here… eight outfits I am never gonna need.”
“Well… you never know…” I began.
“No! Forget it. I can’t remember exactly what happened yesterday, but it would be incredibly dangerous to take anymore Elixir ever again. I should have never let you talk me into this in the first place.”
“Oh well…” I managed to force out, “I guess we can return the clothes to the shops… I still have the receipts.”
Richard’s eyes opened wide as I said this . “Wait… you mean you paid for this all? Why would you do that? Oh no.”
“What?” I asked.
“Look, I didn’t think it was worth mentioning yesterday. According to the research notes, when a person takes the Elixir they become incredibly charming and persuasive. Dr Jekyll thought it had something to do with pheromones. The more time you spend with them, the more malleable your mind becomes and the more addicted you get to their presence.”
I raised a whimsical eyebrow. “Oh come off it… that sounds like BS.”
“What… and gender transforming Victorian formulas are completely reasonable? Look, the control starts small… a desire to please and help the other person. Then it transforms into a sexual addiction and desire to please them and be with them all the time. Finally it becomes an almost slavish devotion and desire to serve and obey without question.”
I shrugged. “So what?”
“So I’m worried you were falling under my control yesterday… I didn’t think such a low dose would create the effect. Maybe you are particularly susceptible or something.”
“You are over reacting,” I snorted. “It was my fault you became Riley, so I wanted to help you out. That was the limit of it.”
“If you are sure thats all it was, then fine. But the point remains that things got out of control yesterday” he muttered. “Are you gonna tell me what happened?”
I shrugged, “Nothing much… just some shopping, we tried the beach but Abby wasn’t interested then we went back home so you could turn back.” He looked at me piercingly. For a minute I thought he was gonna call me out and accuse me of holding something back. Luckily he didn’t.
“Okay, if you say so,” he murmured doubtfully. “Go put all this girly stuff in your car will you? I need to finish getting dressed then we can take it to the store and that will be an end to it. Riley is dead.”
I gathered all the bags, makeup and jewellery Riley had bought together and ferried it to my car. Then Richard appeared and climbed into the passenger seat and we headed off.
We had only gone about half a block when a motor bike suddenly pulled in behind me and started tailgating me. He started gesturing that I should pull over and nervously I did so.
A tall black haired youth in biker leathers sauntered slowly over and I swore as I recognised Travis, Abby’s over protective brother.
“Well well well,” he grinned confidently. “If it isn’t the little maggot that tried to get a date with my sister. Get out of your car.”
I obeyed… Travis was not the sort of guy you wanted to fuck with. “So… Abby tells me you tried to get a date with her yesterday. What the hell is a pathetic little nerd like you doing snooping around my sister? The only reason you aren’t dead is that she tells me your friend… the blonde girl, said you have a tiny pecker. ”
Travis moved menacingly closer. “Which is why I’m here. I want you to do something for me… or I really will kill you. Abby said this girl you were with was the hottest girl she ever saw. I wanna date with your friend… Riley was it? And you better get me a date with her, or I’m gonna break your legs for trying to fuck with my sister. As it is… I’m still gonna break your nose…”
Then just to prove he was serious he punched me hard in the face and sent me falling to the floor.
Stars span and blood gushed. I felt hands helping me up and pushing a cloth into my face to staunch the blood. Then I heard Travis again. “I expect to hear from you by tonight or else I break something else.” Then I was put into my car and I heard Richard mumble something reassuringly into my ear.
By the time my heart finished pounding we were back at Richard’s house and he was helping me into his kitchen.
“Holy shit, I thought that guy had knocked you out,” gasped Richard tossing me an ice pack to put on my bust nose.
“If we don’t do as he says, he probably will.” I groaned. “You have to turn back into Riley and go on a date with him.”
“Are you nuts?” Snapped Richard angrily. “I told you no. No more Riley.”
“Richard, I need you to do this… you better do this!” I snarled.
“No… and you can’t make me,” he retorted.
My jaw now set and my nose still throbbing I swept out of the room and ran to the lab. Grabbing a vial of Elixir I ran back to the kitchen.
“Take it!” I commanded.
“No. Fuck you. Put that back at once… it's dangerous!”
“No… I need you to become Riley again… and if you won’t help me willingly, I’ll make you!”
With a yell I leapt towards Richard and suddenly we were wrestling. Keeping the vial in my hand out of reach I managed to knock Richard to the floor and pin him down.
“Yes… do it… give it all to him,” I seemed to hear Riley’s voice whisper in my ear and suddenly full of triumph I obeyed.
Uncorking the vial I poured it into Richard’s mouth and he gurgled as the delicious pink goop filled his mouth. “Nooooooo!” he gurgled as I forced my hand over his mouth and he swallowed it all.
Richard convulsed and I leapt back. His eyes rolled back into his head and he groaned. “Ohhhhhhh fuck… feels sooooo good!”
I watched in joy as Richard’s body began to change. It happened faster this time… blonde hair erupting, pink lips parting and breasts growing. Then with a groan, Riley opened her blue eyes and giggled. She looked at me through her long lashes and I felt my heart flutter.
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“Oh boy… Richard is gonna be so fucking mad with you. Mmmmh, you just gave me a whole vial… so it’s semi permanent this time.”
She sat up and grinned. “Well… I have a date to get ready for. Go get my clothes out of the car… this is gonna be fun!”
CHAPTER 4
I stood with the empty vial of Elixir in my hand feeling a mix of guilt and excitement.  Richard hadn’t wanted to take the Elixir, but I had forced him to and now Riley was back.  What had I done? 
My heart was still pounding with excitement, but I had just made my best-friend into his hot alter-ego without his permission - what sort of a guy did that make me?  I hated that seeing the girl of my dreams had to be under such circumstances, I had wanted Richard to become Riley again voluntarily… not like this.
Looking up at my stunned expression with her inscrutable blue eyes, Riley jumped lithely to her feet and stretched her hot, young, perfect body.  She admired herself in Richard’s mirror with a grin, running her hands through her blonde hair delightedly and smiling mischievously at me through the reflection in the glass.
“Well you’ve gone and done it now haven’t you?  You brought me back, all just to save your own skin and get what you wanted.  Such a bad boy.”
Riley purred as she said ‘bad boy’ and I felt my dick stiffen almost automatically; God, she was such a hot minx. She seemed different this time, even sexier and more confident.  There was no suggestion, other than the clothes she was wearing, that mere moments ago she had been a boy.
Almost as if she were reading my thoughts, she ran a hand lovingly down her soft skin and shivered at her own touch.
“Ohhhh yes. I feel so fucking good, it’s even better this time.  I feel stronger, sexier and so much more delicious. Poor Richard has no chance of competing with this… being him is so boring. Mmmh, I’m horny and I think you deserve a reward for being such a good boy and bringing me back.”
Turning round from the mirror, Riley slowly slid Richard’s top over her head to reveal her perfect breasts and slender body.  Walking over to me she sank to her knees and looking up at me with her gorgeous blue eyes her hands started to fumble at my crotch.
“W...w...wait what are you doing?” I gasped, as her hands dived into my pants and pulled my stiffening cock out. 
“I’m going to suck your dick again… I enjoyed the taste of your cum last time and I want more.  Just a shame you aren’t bigger, but your cock will do for an appetiser.”
“I thought you couldn’t remember that,” I groaned as I got harder and harder, Riley’s small and perfect hands rhythmically pumping my cock as she spat on my dick to lubricate it.
“Unlike that loser Richard, I remember everything.  I’m superior to him in every way.  Now shut up and let me suck your dick.”  Riley’s pink mouth engulfed my dick and I groaned helplessly as she began to expertly suck and lick my cock.  I knew this was only her second blowjob, but she was like a girl possessed and as she made eye contact with me and her perfumed scent filled my nose I felt the first urges of a shuddering orgasm begin to build
It could only have been a minute or so, but it felt like an hour… a heavenly hour where I had never felt so good. Then suddenly, Riley intensified her sucking, her hands massaging my balls till with a moaning gasp I came in her mouth, my cum squirting out as she eagerly sucked and swallowed every drop till I was fully drained.  
“Good boy,” she breathed, licking her lips and standing slowly up.  Her scent filled my nostrils and she stood confidently in front of me, her legs spread slightly apart and a hand still wrapped round my now floppy cock.
“Did you enjoy that?” she purred, looking deep into my eyes almost hypnotically.
“Yes… yes I loved it.”
“And do you love me baby?”
As she said it, my vision seemed to swim and I almost felt my will being sucked out of me.  I hadn’t believed Richard’s nonsense warnings from before, but suddenly it occurred to me that maybe he was right… maybe I was falling under Riley’s control?  It felt so fucking wonderful…
“Yes… I love you.”
Riley smiled and shivered, seemingly getting off on the fact that I was under her spell.  
“That makes me very happy,” she smiled bitchily, “In fact it makes me so happy that I am going to help you baby.  I’ll get dressed and then you can drive me to Travis.  Don’t worry, I’ll get that horrible bully to leave you alone… now bring me my things, I need to freshen up and get ready.”
I went down to the car and retrieved all of Riley’s clothes and makeup.  Then she made me wait downstairs whilst she washed, showered and got ready for her date.  When she finally came downstairs I was amazed at how sexy she looked.  I hadn’t thought it was possible, but now she was even hotter than before.
Riley had lots more makeup on than last time and her tiny blonde body was pushed up by the sexiest pair of  calfskin cowboy boots I had ever seen.  She had a disgracefully short denim mini skirt on with a rhinestone belt around the rim and a tiny little crop top that barely covered her midriff or her arms and showed off the curve of her tits perfectly. 
“How do I look?” she giggled, striking a sexy pose and causing my dick to get hard again.
“I errr, I ummmm,” I floundered, not knowing what to say.
“Oh, it’s okay baby you can say it… I look slutty don’t I? Don’t worry, I think I like being a slut.  Mmmmh, it feels good to be uninhibited, unlike that pathetic dweeb Richard.  When you’re this hot and this perfect, why not flaunt yourself and enjoy the pleasure of being sexy?”
Strutting past me to my car, Riley climbed impatiently into the passenger's seat and tapped her fingers on the dash.  “Well… come on then, we mustn't keep Travis waiting.”  
I started the engine and we drove off.  My head was reeling… things were suddenly going far too fast.  What had started as an innocent and fun experiment to get with the girl of my dreams, had swiftly run out of control.  I wanted to stop and think, take stock of this situation and work out what was happening, but Riley’s scent seemed to fill my head and I couldn’t think properly.  This was still my friend Richard and I knew I should protect him, but now he had become this super confident and sexy girl, I couldn’t seem to control him… if anything, she was in control of me.
“Here we are,” grinned Riley as we pulled up on the street outside the Travis household.  “I bet he wasn’t expecting his date to be so soon.  I think it’s best that I go and talk to this bonehead, I’ll be all nice and sweet to him and convince him to leave you alone.  You better wait here, I may be a while.”
Clopping out of the car, Riley blew me a kiss and then strutting to the door of the house knocked.  I saw Travis open the door and his eyes go wide as he took in the sexy bitch on his doorstep.  Riley giggled and played with her hair.  I couldn’t hear what they were saying, but after a few minutes of talk on the doorstep - she stepped into the house and disappeared with the school bully.
I sat in the car waiting as ordered.  Minutes dragged by, but I waited. Riley’s scent seemed to linger on the air and I simply sat and obeyed.  Then minutes became half an hour, but still I waited, almost in a trance.  Half an hour became an hour and finally I began to come round as if from a daze.  “What the fuck am I doing?” I muttered to myself. “She might be in trouble, I have to check.”
Climbing out of my car I walked nervously to the property.  If Travis caught me creeping around, he might attack me again - so I decided to sneak around and see if I could find a window and see in. I just wanted to check that Riley was safe.
As I neared the house, I saw that there was a large window at the back that opened out onto a view of the kitchen/living room.  Creeping closer I began to hear strange noises emerging from the open window and as I got closer I recognised Riley’s voice. Peering through the glass my heart nearly stopped as I saw into the living room and the scene within made me want to throw up in horror.
Travis was lying naked on his back on a large mattress he had pulled into the room. His huge eight inch cock was standing fully to attention and above him, her tight virgin pussy impaled deep upon his cock was Riley.  She ground her shaven pussy on his dick, making him groan as she threw back her head and moaned like a slut.
“Yes, OH FUCK YES! Your cock is so good, it’s so big and feels amazing within me.  So much better than that pathetic nerd cock I’ve had to suck up to now.” 
Giggling and moaning, Riley bounced up and down on Travis’ big dick and to my horror I felt myself get hard as I couldn’t tear my eyes away.  It was like something out of a porn film, she looked so good on his superior dick and I couldn’t seem to stop watching as she creamed repeatedly all over his dick.  She was moaning and gasping and before I knew it I had my dick in my hand and I was pumping it in time to every thrust into Riley’s tight pussy.  I began imagining I was fucking her, longing for it to be me.  It was so hot to stand here in the yard jerking off to Riley, she was so fucking hot.  I couldn’t believe what an evil slut she was being, fucking the bully and betraying me and Richard like this.
“Yes, cum inside me baby…” moaned Riley, grinding her hips like a pornstar and suddenly she looked straight at me.  I couldn’t break her gaze as she smiled maliciously and I realised she knew I had been watching her all this time. “Cum now,” she commanded, “cum for me... “ and I knew that she wasn’t just talking to Travis.  I groaned as my cum spurted out of my dick, almost in exact unison with Travis as he pumped his cum into Riley and she threw back her head and moaned with pure unadulterated lust.
“YESSSSS, ohhhh FUCK YESSSSSSSS!”
Released from Riley’s spell, I urgently crammed my still dripping dick into my pants and hurried to the car.  What the hell was I doing?  I was a mix of rage and despair.  By rights I should drive off and leave the bitch here, I couldn’t believe what she had done.  But this was still my friend and this was all my fault, I couldn’t abandon him/her… whatever they were now.
After a few minutes, Riley suddenly emerged from the house and swaying over to me climbed into the car.  Her makeup was a mess and she grinned at me as she tried to sort her hair out.  “His cum is still dripping out of me, I didn’t bother to clean up - just put my panties on and left. You wanna see?”
“You bitch, how could you do this?” I snarled.
“I thought you loved me?” laughed Riley, batting her lashes at me and then laughing cruelly.
“Oh for fucks sake, grow up.  What did you think I was gonna do in there?  You wanted Travis off your back - well, he’s gonna be my new boyfriend so you needn’t worry about him, unless you piss me off of course.  He’s such a good fuck, and being the girl of the school bully will make me super popular.  I already have another date arranged with him and I can’t wait.”
“You’re insane,” I gasped, “You don’t even exist. You can’t go to school or have a boyfriend.  You’re really Richard and he’s not gonna want to date Travis.  This can’t happen!”
“We’ll see about that,” purred Riley. “Oh and I wasn’t kidding earlier, so I’ll ask again.  Do you still love me?” She leaned close and her scent filled the air. I felt the strange lethargy and lack of willpower I had felt earlier overcome me.  Her scent filled my head and I felt my anger fade.  If Riley wanted to fuck a guy with a big dick, who was I to stop her?  
“Ye...yes I still love you. I… I guess it isn’t my business if you want to have sex with Travis.”
“That’s right baby, it isn’t.  I know you’re just jealous of us, but don’t worry, I’ll still suck your average little dick.  Just do as I say and you’ll find things are much simpler.  You’re completely right though, I have a lot of work to do now ‘becoming real’.  We have lots to do and I’m going to need your help.  Now drive me back home so we can get started. I have an idea from something I read in the Jekyll instructions and I think it’s just what I need...”
CHAPTER 5
I had fucked up.  No… I had really fucked up.
There was no other way of putting it.  I had turned my best-friend Richard into an evil man-eating slut… and now I was completely in love with her.  Riley was the girl of my dreams (or nightmares) and I couldn’t stop thinking about her.  Too bad that Richard and Riley couldn’t both exist at the same time. Or were they already the same person?  It was so confusing, Riley was like Richard in some ways… but each time she changed she seemed different… more ‘her’ somehow. She was certainly becoming more wicked, evil and bitchy with every transformation. I wondered when she would turn back into Richard and I felt my insides churn… he wasn’t going to be happy about all this.
“What are you thinking about?” purred Riley as she watched me intently from her the sofa and I turned to look at her.  It was two hours since we had got back from Travis’s place and Riley was reading through all the notes we had on the Elixir.  Right now though her head was lifted up to look at me and I felt my heart beat a little faster as her eyes locked with mine.
Her gorgeous eyes were still the same colour as Richard’s, but they seemed deeper, more compelling and whenever I looked into them I felt myself falling helplessly under her spell.
“You…” I answered truthfully.
She smiled, pleased by vanity and perhaps some other emotion that I couldn’t quite place.  “Good - don’t ever stop thinking about me. I like that you are obsessed with me. But enough navel gazing, come assist me in the lab… we have work to do.”
I felt a little foolish as we squeezed into the secret lab and Riley went to work with the alchemical apparatus.  She seemed to mixing up a new batch of Elixir, only this one seemed to have a subtly different tinge to it.  I handed her the chemicals and equipment she demanded and within an hour she had completed her new brew.
To my surprise, once she had completed the slightly lavender liquid, she didn’t drink it but instead dabbed it onto her wrists and neck. 
“I thought that was Elixir you were making,” I queried as a strangely intense smell filled the small room and I felt my head go dizzy.  It smelt like Riley’s delicious body scent, the one that always drove me so wild, but five times more intense and overpowering. 
“A close relative,” she smirked watching me closely and not failing to notice the almost euphoric state I was in.  “A perfume designed to mix with and intensify certain secretions my body already produces and massively enhance their speed and effectiveness.  Of course, you’ve already been exposed longer than anyone - but if anything it seems to be making you more susceptible.”
I could barely understand a word my Goddess was saying.  I just wanted to fall down before her and grovel and worship her.  
“Mmmmh, I like the way you are looking at me. Complete obedience, like you’re going to cum your pants for me.  This stuff really works, I bet I could make you do anything. Ooooh, actually why don’t you cum your pants for me?”
I groaned as my dick pulsed and I orgasmed, a simple command from my Goddess causing hot sticky cum to gush into my pants as she looked at me with wicked amusement on her face.  Riley smiled with barely contained glee. “Oh fuck, this is so fucking hawt.  With this perfume I can make people do ANYTHING! Hahahaha, no wonder precious little Daddy didn’t want anyone playing with the Elixir.  But it’s too late now Daddy… good little Richard is rapidly being destroyed and soon only I… your new daughter Riley will remain!”
Looking at me with amused disgust, Riley pointed towards the bathroom. “Go clean up your mess, take all your clothes off and come back when you’re done…  I have an idea.”
As soon as I was out of the room, away from that intoxicating smell… my senses returned somewhat and I felt acute embarrassment at what I had done.  And yet still I felt the need, the desire to do what Riley told me.  In the bathroom I used toilet paper to soak up as much of the cum as I could and then I threw it into the toilet and flushed it away.  Peeling off my clothing, I heaped it into a pile and walked back into Riley’s bedroom.
She laughed at me as I entered naked and then indicated her lingerie on the bed. “Seeing as you fouled your own clothes, I want you to put on my bra and panties.  I think you’ll enjoy wearing them.  Don’t you think you’ll look cute in my clothes?  I think this is secretly what you wanted when you came in your pants…”
I nodded, even though I knew full well there were clothes of Richard’s I could wear… if Riley wanted me to dress like a sissy, who was I to refuse?  Resistance was useless. My cock was hard again as I walked over to the bed and with shaking hands picked up Riley’s soft cotton panties.  These had been on her Goddess like body and now I was going to wear them.  They were so pretty and part of me was jealous I didn’t have a slim sexy body like hers to squeeze into them.
Indeed, her panties were far too small for me, but they stretched to fit… even if they did crush my balls a bit. My dick was still hard and stretching her panties out at the front. Sliding her matching bra around my chest, I struggled to fasten it as she watched amused from her seat in the corner as she picked up her phone and began taking photos of me.
“Well, well, well… what a little sissy you are.”
Leaning forward intently, I whimpered as Riley’s scent filled my head and I helplessly fell deeper into her powerful spell.
“Listen carefully to me, you are now completely addicted to wearing my clothing, especially my panties under your own clothing.  As long as you have my panties on, you are under my control.  Even when I turn back into Richard, when you have my panties on… you will still serve me. When you wear girls clothes you feel so sexy and slutty… it’s addictive and you want more.  You long to be a pretty little slut and have all the boys want you. Now tell me who you love?”
“I love you Riley,” I whimpered. “I will do anything for you. I want to wear your clothes and be pretty.”
“Good,” she giggled.  “Now I think it’s time for your reward for being such a good boy,”
We went into her room and we lay on the bed.  Riley straddled me and I groaned as she slid her hands around my cock and slowly began jerking my dick up and down.  It felt so amazing, but she slowed down and forced me to edge as I neared climax.  Just as I was about to cum… she stopped and I groaned helplessly as a tiny dribble of cum leaked out of the tip of my cock and my orgasm was ruined.
Laughing she took out her phone and took more photos as I lay there and she grinned at me
“This cock belongs to me now,” purred Riley evilly, “and you won’t cum unless I say.  You belong to me now baby, you’re mine…”  
“Now I want you to sleep and whilst you sleep I want you to listen to my voice…” I felt myself drifting to sleep as Riley whispered into my ear. Occasionally her hand would stroke my cock again, edging me and bringing me to the brink of pleasure before stopping.  She was murmuring something so delicious that I fell into the most wonderful erotic dream of my life.  That’s it baby, my voice is inside you now… your thoughts are becoming my thoughts.  We are as one… 
Slowly, I drifted into a hypnotic sleep whilst Riley whispered her delicious poison into my mind…  Hours must have passed, but eventually - a sound awoke me.
It was the sound of Riley moaning in of pain, and leaping to my feet I ran to find her in the living room.  She must have finished with me and gone out, who knows how long ago.  But now Riley lay on the floor screaming and arching her back as her bones popped and her skin shifted.  I watched in horror as she grew larger, her breasts deflating and her hair shortening.  Richard’s face pushed out as Riley fought to maintain control… “Nooooo I don’t ahhhhh wanna go back to being a stupid boy,” she groaned… but she was losing the battle as her fingernails shortened and muscles spread across her slender body giving her a male physique.  “Ooooh remember to wear my clothes,” she moaned with a final effort then she was gone.
I watched as Richard’s dick pushed out of Riley’s pussy and her voice lowered and broke till with a final groaning gasp, Richard regained full control and panting slowly he raised himself groggily to his feet.  For a second he was disorientated… then he was back in the present and very, very angry.
“You bastard… what have you done to MEEEE!” he screamed as his eyes focused on me and he saw what I was wearing.  “Holy shit, what have you done to yourself?”
With a snarl of rage he ran at me, and pinning me against the wall looked into my eyes.  “You forced me to take more Elixir and now I’m cursed! I can’t remember half of what that bitch made me do, but I do know one thing.  She’s evil and she’s getting stronger. THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!”
With a heave I managed to get him off me and we stood panting looking at each other.
“Look at yourself,” he groaned, “You’re wearing her fucking lingerie.  You’re her fucking slave and God knows what she has planned for you, take that sluts clothes off at once and have some decency.” 
Do as he says for now… but when he isn’t looking put on my g-string. It’s there by the bed… I was wearing it before Travis fucked me.  
I groaned… I didn’t know if Riley’s voice in my head was real or not… how could it be… but it didn’t matter.  I had to obey it.  She must have fucked me up so badly whilst I slept that some aspect of her pysche was whispering poison into my ears… saying the things she might say if she was here.  I was so under her spell that she was with me at all times now.
Richard was busily putting oh his clothes and I grabbed mine, but before he could see it, I had slid on Riley’s g-string and had it on under my jeans before he knew it. They felt so naughty, riding up into my butt.  A little piece of Riley… corrupting me still, making me want to obey her.
“That twisted bitch could have anything in mind for you.” panted Richard.  “You have to help me… you have to help me destroy her.  If we don’t act soon, she may become so strong that… I’ll become her permanently and you’ll be enslaved to her forever.  I wish you’d never convinced me to take the Elixir.  But there’s still hope… lets go get the research from the lab, I’m sure there is a cure somewhere in there.”
Mmmmh, good boy.  You love wearing girls panties don’t you?  So much hotter and so easy for a boy to pull to one side whilst he slides his big dick into you.
Oh he is sooooo boring, purred Riley into my mind.  You’re going to help make him into me aren’t you? I can’t wait to get free again and become even sluttier. And I just know you want me to keep making you naughtier too.   I groaned at the thought of corrupting Richard again and again until only Riley was left… watching her giggle as Richard was destroyed and she became the Goddess I needed her to be.  Then she would corrupt me too and make me even more perverted… it would feel soooo good.
I could barely concentrate on reality, my head was so full of naughty cross-dressing thoughts.  My dick was so hard in Riley’s panties I could barely stand it.
Later on, you should put on my bra and my stockings too.  You’ll need to shave your legs first, but I just know you’ll love them.  Ooooh and there are some false French nails just waiting for you on my bedroom table. 
We walked to the secret room but what we found there was chaos.  Whilst I had been sleeping Riley must have visited the room.  It was trashed.  She had destroyed and burned in the fire any documents that might have helped us.  Others were missing and we had no way of knowing where she had taken them.  The Elixir was missing and the apparatus to make more, or any sort of cure with it.
“The only hope now,” muttered Richard, “Is to call my Dad and tell him about everything we have done.  He has been the guardian of the Elixir for a long time, I’m sure he will know what to do.  He’s gonna kill both of us though!”
I wasn’t really listening.  In my mind I could hear Riley whispering evil thoughts to me… thoughts that were so delicious to listen to… promises that were making me so horny.
You know why I wanted you to wear my panties don’t you?  I want you to wear all my clothes… dress up like a slutty girl because we both know its what you want too.  I want you to wear my makeup and be a slut just like me.. yesss baby, I want you to become exactly like me.  We’ve always been friends and soon we’ll be sluts together.  You’re going to help me corrupt Richard fully into me, then I’m gonna help you become a hot girl too.  
As I stood looking at Richard, I felt my head spinning.  Things were starting to get more twisted and I didn’t know if I could resist Riley’s evil offer.   Did she really want me to become a hot teenage slut like her, or was this just another one of her games to control me?  I should be helping my friend resist her, but she was making me come to her side and I didn’t know if I could stop her.
Don’t worry babe, you’re going to love being an evil girl.  It’s easy. We’re gonna have so much fun together.  And it all starts tonight after Daddy gets home.
I had a feeling that things were about to get a lot more crazy… but there was nothing I could do to stop it now… even if I wanted.
PART 6
At the same time that Riley was inside my head controlling me, Richard seemed to be fully back in control of himself and completely back to normal.  We stood in his living room whilst he explained that his Father, the original guardian of the Elixir would probably know how to make a cure that could stop him ever becoming a girl again and that he needed my help.
It was only moments since Richard had returned, but I already missed my Mistress with all my heart.  I was her cross-dressing little bitch now and my only purpose was to ensure her dominance of Richard and help her become the blonde Goddess she deserved to be.  Such a good boy, such a hot little slut.  Soon you’ll get to know how good it feels to be a bitch… I promise - whispered her soothing voice in my mind.
I was barely listening.  My head was full of Riley’s whispers. I felt like a puppet being controlled by another person and the worst thing was, I liked it.  Under my male clothes I could feel Riley’s g-string and as long as it was in contact with my body I was aroused and susceptible to her desires.  She had programmed me - like a robot - and now I was hopelessly under her control, even though Richard was back to normal - Riley was still with me.
“Are you even listening to me?” snapped Richard as he walked up to me. “This is all your fault, so you could at least do me the courtesy of helping me out.  I need you to stay here and keep looking for where that bitch might have hidden the Elixir and the equipment.  It’s imperative that you find any hiding places and then put any vials somewhere where I don’t know where they are.  Otherwise she might take control of me again and make me drink more.  Each time the effects get worse… a few more doses and I might get stuck as that slut forever.  In the meantime I’m gonna go out and look for my Dad… he’s not answering his phone.  If he gets home before me, stall him and get me back here at once.”
Whilst Richard left the house to look for his Dad, the voice of Riley in my head guided me to Richard’s bedroom.  I found the floorboard she directed me to and prised it up, revealing a cubby-hole containing a single vial of Elixir and a small bottle of her pheromone enhancing perfume . The Elixir vial looked slightly different to what I expected.  The consistency seemed different and it was honey blonde colour instead of pink.  The smell of the perfume wafting from the other bottle made my compulsion to serve my Goddess grow and almost sent me into a trance.
Ohhhh, we’ll stall him all right. The only threat to us now is Richard’s Dad - Henry.  He knows more about the Elixir than any living person and he could create a cure to rid his son of me forever,  But - he’s still a man and he could be enslaved through our pheromones.  Then we could use his talents to make more powerful Elixir that could make me even stronger.  Luckily for us, I’m pretty talented too and before I turned back to that fool, not only did I imprint this version of me in your mind - I made you a little gift. Go get it
I made that vial using a strand of my sexy blonde hair.  It contains my DNA but it’s highly unstable and won’t last long.  Drinking it will turn you into a physical and mental copy of me for about two hours.  That’s right baby - you’re finally gonna get to know how it feels to be a hot girl. Isn’t that what you secretly wanted?  Once you become me, we can have some real fun.
I gasped and nearly cummed my panties at the thought of becoming Riley.  My Mistress wanted me to transform into her?  The thought of her emerging from me, of me becoming a horny little bitchy slut to corrupt and enslave Henry’s dad was so hot.  My hands were shaking with anticipation.
You see  - what Richard doesn’t realise is I changed all the numbers in his phone.  He thinks he is ringing his father, but he’s not.  We know the real number, so lets lure Henry to the house and then enslave him.  I’m relying on you here baby, so don’t let me down.  Once he’s here, set me free - you’re going to enjoy being me soooooo much.
Picking up my phone I sent Henry’s dad a text begging him to come home quick as Richard was in trouble.  It didn’t take long for him to reply and soon he was on his way.  Meanwhile I gathered some of Riley’s clothes and makeup and sat in the living room.  Put my clothes on first -  Henry won’t be here for a while yet and we don’t want to waste any ‘me’ time.
I shivered as I ripped off my clothes till I was only wearing Riley’s g-string.  Then I swapped out my underwear for a frilly pink bra and matching panties.  It felt so naughty to be putting on a girls clothes, and my cock was rock hard at the thought of what was about to happen.  The underwear didn’t fit well.., my larger body was stretching it out a bit - but I was confident that I could squeeze into the clothes for now.  Once I transformed, they would fit me like a glove - I couldn’t wait..
I pulled on a cute pink camisole and slid a plaid skirt on.  Now I looked like some slutty college girl and that made my cock leak as I shivered and pulled on Riley’s knee length white socks.   I couldn’t put her sneakers on yet - my feet were far too big - so instead I put on some of her jewelry and makeup - a cute pink choker round my neck and smokey eye makeup with pink eyeshadow.
I was putting the finishing touches to my makeup when I heard a car pulling up in the drive.  It was time. Okay baby - time to become me.  Drink up and see how you like being Riley.  Uncorking the vial of Elixir I eagerly obeyed and drank it down like sweet honey.  Instantly I groaned as I felt my body burn with an erotic fire.  I had seen Richard transform several times now, but now I knew exactly how it felt, as my insides squirmed pleasurably.  Yesssss, transform you little slut… become a bitch, it feels good doesn’t it?
I nearly orgasmed at the sensation of being a slut, I felt so good - so naughty and perfect.  Mmmmmh, this was so much better than being some dumb boy.
“Ohhhhhh fuck, yesssss,” I heard my mouth gasp as my body became smaller and the clothes settled more comfortably on my body.   Riley’s bitchy DNA was coursing through my body, overwriting me and transforming me into her.  I felt my lips curve into a slutty grin as I giggled and rubbed my shrinking cock through my panties.  Blonde hair fell around my head as I was corrupted and changed into a horny girl, my small perfect tits pushing outwards and Riley’s devious personality overwriting mine.  Yesssss, that’s it… you’re me now - you’re RILEY!
“Yes, my plan worked perfectly,” I giggled stretching sluttily as my fingernails lengthened and my useless cock finally sucked inside to leave a tight, wet pussy.  The voice in my head was gone now - for a good reason.  I was Riley now… or at least a version of her.  Of course I knew in my heart that I wasn’t the real her and soon I would turn back into that useless boy, so I had to move fast.  
“Don’t worry real me, I’ll make sure you win against Richard,” I giggled as I reached down to pick up the perfume and dab plenty onto my wrists and neck.  Soon I stunk of the stuff, but now I was a hot bitch, I was completely immune.  Anyone else who smelt it would be enslaved to my desires and my first target was Henry.
I only had time to slip my sneakers on and sit on the couch, before he entered and walked over.
“What the hell is going on?  I get some strange message from my sons friend saying he’s in danger and then I find some girl here. Wait… you look familiar… you aren’t… holy shit Richard, you didn’t take Elixir did you?”
“Ohhhhh don’t worry,” I grinned standing up and swaying over to Henry.  “I’m not really your son - so you don’t need to feel bad about wanting to fuck me.”
The smell of my perfume rose around Henry’s head and he moaned as he breathed it deep.  The effects were stunningly effective and quick too.  In a matter of moments, Henry was completely enslaved and I led him over to the sofa as his cock strained within his pants.
“Ironic really - all those years you guarded the Elixir and stopped anyone using it… such a waste.  You could have been enjoying yourself and becoming a hot slut like me.  Never mind - now you have me to make you feel better and help you enjoy the benefits, I’m going to make you cum so hard you’ll never want to fuck another girl ever again.
Leaning over the sofa I unbuttoned Henry’s fly and smiling slowly wrapped my hot pink lips around his cock - which had quickly sprung out.  He was a nice size actually and I grinned as I felt my nipples get hard and my pussy moisten.  This was going to be fun.  Henry moaned as I began to suck and lick the tip of his dick, more of my scent filling his head as he growled appreciatively and fell more under my control. I sucked and slurped, deep throating him and showing him what a slut I was.
“Ohhhh fuck, you little slutty bitch - you’re enslaving me and it feels so good.  Ahhhh damn that son of mine - he’s let things get out of control and now I can’t resist you… uuuggghh Mistress.”
“Shhhhhh, just relax baby and let me make you mine” I grinned popping his cock out of my mouth and coming around the other side of the chair.  “Now I’m going to slide my tight wet pussy onto your big cock.  As I fuck you - I want you to tell me how I can accelerate the Elixir effects to cause permanent corruption.”
“Nooooo, I can’t tell you that,” gasped Henry - heroically resisting as I slowly slid my sopping wet cunt onto his dick and with a satisfied purr began to ride him cowgirl style.  
“Of course you can darling,” I smirked using my sex and my powers to bend him to my will.  “I want to know how to completely destroy the male half and let the female half have complete dominance.”
“Uggghhhhhh, ohhhh fuck your pussy is soooo tight.  I’m in heaven.  Ohhhh Mistress - please forgive what I said earlier.  I’ll tell you anything. Continued use of Elixir without the cure will cause it, but if you want to accelerate the process - stimulating the subject sexually whilst giving them Elixir should work...”
I grinned as Henry spilled his secrets and then he spilled his cum into me… it felt so nice as it oozed up into my new pussy.
“Thank you Henry - that felt nice.  Now then go to your room for a rest.  Your Mistress will return soon to give you your orders.”  Henry’s cum still dripping down my thighs, I got up and walked over to the kitchen where I retrieved a vial of proper Elixir from where the other me had hidden it earlier.  I hadn’t dared leave it out in case the stupid boy I used to be got big ideas about becoming a slut, but as long as I was Riley - it was safe to hold.  Now I just needed to get this into Richard and bring him to the height of pleasure.  Then at last I would win!
“Hey - what the fuck is going on - I can’t find my Dad anywhere and then I see his car in the drive and… holy shit - you’re… you’re Riley - but how?” gasped a voice from the doorway and I turned to see Richard standing with a shocked expression on his face.
Strutting over I giggled and gave him a good view of my body.  “I can’t believe you wouldn’t want to be me Richard, I’m so much better than you.  You see - I took over your pathetic friend and turned him into me temporarily.  His mind is so soft now, I can program him to be anything. Once I’ve won full control of our body and he changes back, I’m going to make him into my slutty sissy bitch as his reward.  Oh and don’t think anyone else can help.  If you’re looking for Daddy - he’s enslaved to me now, just like your friend is.”
“I’ll never become you bitch!” snarled Richard. “I’ll stop you somehow,”
“Tsk tsk, don’t be so babyish.  It’s time to put aside your manhood and embrace the advantages that being a girl can give you. What you won’t admit to anyone is that it’s what you really want - but I know you Richard - I AM YOU… and soon you will be too…”  I pulled the vial of Elixir out from behind my back.  “So it’s time to drink up and become me forever… time to be a slut baby.” 
I ran over and barreled into him knocking him down.  The scent rising from my body didn’t seem to affect him at all - that was irritating. Maybe him being the original me made him immune somehow - even when male.  No matter,  I would have to win this battle through aggression.  Richard was bigger and stronger than me, but I was a wild slut and I wouldn’t let anything stop me as I headbutted him and he groaned as his head hit the floor.  
His mouth was open as I smashed him in the face again, then before he could react I poured the entire vial of Elixir into his mouth.  He swallowed reflexively and I giggled with glee as I slid down his body and ripped his pants down, stuffing his cock into my mouth.
“NOOOOO!” screamed Richard as I began to suck his cock and his transformation began.  I knew that the added sexual stimulation would lock the transformation and he would become me forever.  All I had to do was make him cum.
Richard was moaning and squealing, his body cracking and changing.  His cock was shrinking in my mouth but I could feel his cum erupting out as I sucked and sucked, giggling madly.  Finally with an earsplitting moan of pure pleasure, Richard began to orgasm fully and he dug his sharpened fingernails into my head as I felt his cock vanish and my own wet slit open between his legs.
I looked up, some of Richard’s cum still dripping down my chin, and gazed into my own sexy features. The original Riley grinned at me.  “Well done, I see my plan worked absolutely perfectly.  But now I think it’s time for you to go back to being a boy.  Now what was that trigger word - oh yes… WORM!”
The word seemed to burn in my ears and I screamed as my body shook.  Suddenly I remembered I wasn’t really Riley.  My sexy body was reverting back to normal and I groaned in despair as my cock pushed out of my groin and I lost all of my sexual powers.   Now I was just some dumb sissy boy with cum on his chin, dressed in lingerie and stinking of mind controlling perfume that was already having a warping effect on my mind.
Goddess Riley looked down at me and grinned.  “Poor boy. Only your betrayal and help has allowed me to win.  I have so much to thank you for.  It was you who created me and helped me grow by convincing Richard to drink Elixir. It was also you who taught me being a bitch felt so good by showing me how fun it was to control a boy.  Bit by bit, Richard fed my power till I was stronger than even him.  Now I have replaced him and it feels good.”
I whimpered as Riley advanced.  “Oh… but don’t worry my pet.  Now that my father is under my control, I’ll learn more about the Elixir and what it can do.    I’ll plumb its secrets and find ways to use my powers for my own gain.  And you - my faithful friend.  I think I like you being a slutty little sissy - but there’s definitely room for improvement. A version of the Elixir that gives you tits and a girls body, but leaves your little cock behind… I think that’s what we need.”
I nodded obediently as Riley stroked my head.  “Mmmmh, think I’ll call Travis round for a celebratory fuck.  Then we can get to work on your transformation.”
I could have resisted - I could have done something to stop her.  But I had learned the hard way.  Anway who stood in Riley’s way… well… they were on a hiding to nothing…  
THE END
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brf-rumortrackinganon · 8 months ago
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About Harold and P.Diddy
The pictures in the DM story are definitely from the Diana concert in 2007. If you look innthe background of them, you see Prince William and then CH press secretary Paddy Haverson (2003 - 2012). 
The pictures were widely circulated in UK media at the time. Harold looked super chuffed to be hanginb out with Kanye and P.Diddy and other musicians while William floated about in the background though i think he also took a picture with Kanye and P.Diddy.
As for when P.Diddy's parties started.....i was a teen in the 90s. Just as there were stories about R. Kelly and Aliyah and shoddy behaviour, so were stories about P.Diddy.
Though at the time there was this wierd criminal gangs thing going on with East coast rappers ( led by Biggie Smalks and P.Diddy) vs West coast rappers led by Suge Knight. The entire thing seemed dangerous as hell because you heard about Dr Dre and Vanilla Ice being bodily threatened into signing away the rights to their records and or being pressed into signing with the record company he ran. East vs West feud culminated in Tupac and Biggie being shot. 
Somehow, P.Diddy made his image over witn that Police song tribute to Biggie and then started dating JLO whilst pretending to be a reformed man at best or the innocent victim of that East vs West coast feud with fingers pointing at Suge Knight who didn't help matters by being a genuinely scary guy. 
Then on a night out to a club, soneone either got shot or there was a drive by, and the guns were discovered in the car that P.Diddy and JLO was travelling in. 
JLO dropped and ran away from P.Diddy the minute she was released from the police station and she's never looked back. 
P.Diddy started throwing these huge public parties - His White parties became legendary. Even featured on an episode of Sex and the City except they substituted P.Diddy for Richard. 
However, you'd hear all this other stuff going on at the same time. Different parties. JayZ was mentioned at these other parties. As Wendy Williams says,' the streets were talking...'
You heard about the s3xual grooming of young stars in the R& B/ Hip Hop world especially male stars was merely whispered eg then 14yr old Usher, Little Bow Wow, Tevin Campbell. All alleged to have been groomed by P.Diddy. These days Usher gives interviews in which he admits to attending wild private parties with P.Diddy when he lived with him for a year. Everyone glosses over his age when he was doing this.
And that girlband, Danity Kane that he created in 2005 were already accusing him of sordid behaviour and abuse though everyone dismissed them as sour grapes because they didn't become stars on the level of an Usher / Tevin Campbell / Little Bow Wow. 
By the time 2010 rolled around, the streets were talking louder, but everyone ignored it because P.Diddy wasn't as much in our faces. 
I honestly think that if Cassie his ex-girlfriend hadn't sued him and he settled that suit less than 24hrs after it was filed to the tune of $30M, i think he'd have gotten away with this. 
But trust me when i say that P.Diddy's misdeeds are as sordid as R. Kelly and possibly worse if the whispers of what he did in that West vs East coast feud are true. 
The only shocker about all this is T.D. Jakes who was outed as a frequent attendee at these other parties. 
I'm so tired of reverred preachers having rotten, margot filled feet of clay. 
*****
All of this. 💯.
I was going to reblog one of my posts from last week where I said “there’s nothing happening. Wait till the next celeb scandal breaks and then worry if KP is still in the news” (because the new celeb scandal is here) and decided not to dredge up old feelings since Kate’s Friday Statement quelled a lot of it.
But I still want to say what I was going to say and anon, you’ve submitted the PERFECT post.
This P. Diddy lawsuit, especially the RICO part and yesterday’s raid, is huge. The ripple effects are going to be significant.
Just look at all the people mentioned in anon’s post. They mentioned everyone I was writing about - Jennifer Lopez, R. Kelly, Aaliyah, Suge Knight, East Coast vs West Coast.
The rap industry is quaking in their boots. It’s going to get messy.
And also, Jennifer Lopez is having a mini-PR crisis of her own. It’s not as bad as what KP has been going through, but it has the potential to be - people are calling out her ego and bad behavior (she consistently ranks in top 10 worst celebs to meet) and her new film bombed. If she wants to stop all the bad press she’s getting, she’s going to roll on P. Diddy in a tell-all couch confession about how horrific life was with him and now she can finally speak out.
But there’s one guy having a good time with this:
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50 Cent has been telling about P. Diddy for YEARS.
His victory lap on Twitter is most deserved.
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prins-maurice · 4 months ago
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Strange Attractors - Ian Malcolm x Reader (smut)
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Strange Attractors - The Lost World (4423 words) by WizardToad
Summary: After recovering from the events at Jurassic Park Ian Malcolm signs an NDA, reserving himself to the somewhat quiet life of teaching. When you show up, however, you turn his life upside down. Giving into desires you both know you shouldn't, while a man called Richard Levine keeps pestering him about a so-called Lost World. (Smut in chapter 3)
Chapter 1: That’s Plagiarism, Young Lady
His lips make their way over your shoulder as his hair tickles your neck, sending shivers down your spine. His hands roam freely over your curves. The aroma of his cologne mixed with the coffee on his breath envelops you. He grips your waist and lifts you up, setting you down on his desk. You wrap your legs around him, pulling him flush to your core as your lips meet once again. His hands squeeze your thighs at the sensation. Your hands slide over his black shirt, almost ripping the buttons open-.
You manage to shake out of your chaotician-induced hypnosis just in time to see the one and only Dr. Ian Malcolm squinting at you in the bright sunlight. Shit, the whole auditorium is looking at you, he must’ve asked you a question. He knows he caught you daydreaming and a self-satisfactory grin appears on his face. A single ray of sunshine creeps in through the window, shining right on the man in front of you. Paying attention to Professor Malcolm's lectures was never easy, but the way the golden rays reflect off the stray gray hairs on the side of his head is making it entirely impossible today. You haven't heard a single word the man has said, too sucked up in your daydream.
“If you recall, miss (Y/L/N), we were just talking about the ways in which self-organizing behaviours of complex systems are of interest to the study of evolution.” He gestures with his hand, urging you to continue.
Fuck, you really should’ve been paying attention. You were a good student, you really were, but he had caught you off-guard now. He loved tormenting you like that. Dr. Malcolm had been talking your ear off about this a few nights ago when you were reading some papers from a freshman course. Racking your brain for something to spew out, you remember a bit he said about adaptation and the way complex systems seem to strike a balance between the need for order and the imperative to change, locating themselves at the edge of chaos. He raises his eyebrows and smirks, satisfied with your answer. You mentally wipe the sweat from your forehead as he continues his lecture.
Malcolm’s is the last class on Friday evening so the students practically storm out of the auditorium the second it's over. You, however, still have TA duties to fulfill. You deeply regret agreeing to spend the evening working on some stuff in his office. It seemed like a good idea at the time, the two of you alone. You've had a major crush on your professor ever since you stepped foot in his class. Hell, it's the whole reason you applied to become his TA. But now it just felt silly, and you’d rather be in a bar getting shit-faced with your roommate. 
As the others stampede out like a herd of buffalo, you saunter over to his desk at the front. He’s still packing away his papers.
“Don’t think I didn’t notice you copying me word for word. That’s plagiarism young lady” He teases, sending you a lopsided smile 
“Well you did put me on the spot, I had to say something” You lean against his desk, cracking your back. If they’re gonna make people sit in them for two hours, they really should make those damn chairs a bit more comfortable.
“Or maybe you should just pay attention to the lecture next time” He closes his bag and you roll your eyes. He pauses for a minute, thinking. The curiosity kills him, he has to ask. “What were you so preoccupied with?” He comes around the desk and leans next to you, the height difference even more apparent now. 
You feel your ears burning red, recalling the daydream you’d had earlier. You couldn’t tell him the truth, obviously. You scramble for something to say, managing to come up with “Oh, just this assignment for Dr. Thorne’s class. He’s making us solve one of his impossible engineering mysteries again, you know how he is.” You laugh awkwardly, hoping he doesn’t inquire further about the non-existent assignment. He nods “Yeah, typical.” he hums. You let out a soft sigh of relief, he bought it. He swings his bag over his shoulder and ushers you toward his office “C'mon, we've got a lot of work to do tonight.”
As Dr. Malcolm’s TA, you were usually tasked with doing the shitty jobs he didn't want to do. You sometimes wonder why he even has a TA if he barely needs help with anything useful. So now you were stuck in his office, entering research data into the computer on his desk while your roommate was out partying. 
He paces the office with long strides, focused on the papers in his hand. He stares at them with a frown. "Can you believe this shit?" You look up from the computer, finger on the paper in front of you to keep track of the number you were just about to enter. 
"Douchebag" he mutters. 
"Everything okay Dr. Malcolm?"
He looks up at you, a glint in his eyes. He loves it when you call him Dr. Malcolm. He’d never admit it of course, but it made him feel strong and authoritative. For years after the park, he couldn’t go anywhere without his cane. He used to be known as the rock star scientist, and now people just looked at him with pity. Having to rely on others had made him feel weak, the way they looked at him as they helped him up, or held the door open for him, it drove him crazy. Everyone treated him like a sick puppy, except you. You still looked at him with that sense of wonder in your eyes, as if you couldn’t believe that you were standing in front of the great Dr. Malcolm, and he eats it up every time. It makes him feel like his work is still worth something. 
He appreciated that you never asked about this injury either. After the park, everyone involved signed an NDA, forced to keep quiet about what really went down in Costa Rica. Ever since then people haven’t stopped pestering them with their crazy conspiracy theories, some more accurate than others. Regardless, he had to keep to his story, and lie to the masses. Lie to you. His leg had been much better these days, though. He didn’t need his cane anymore, but he felt his reputation had been tarnished anyway.
"Remember that uh- scientist who interrupted my lecture last week? What's his name, uh- Levine. He's convinced there's a real Lost World somewhere." 
The Lost World hypothesis was one of the many theories scientists had come up with to try and answer the never-ending questions regarding the K-T extinction event. The hypothesis states that dinosaurs may never have fully gone extinct and that somewhere in the world, there's an isolated haven where there are still living, breathing dinosaurs. It's absurd, but then again most scientific theories are. 
"What? But that's just a theory. It's a fantasy."
"You don't have to tell me" he runs a hand through his hair sighing. You can tell he's bothered by it, maybe more than he should be, but you decide not to press it. 
"He wants me to help him research it. Find the supposed island, go on an expedition, the whole works. He's been bugging me about this theory all week but I didn't think he'd go this far."
"He's completely nuts." You shake your head.
"He's a pain in the ass is what he is" he grumbles, walking up to the desk and throwing the letter in the trash can. He leans on the back of your chair, hands nearly touching your neck making you shiver from the near-contact. You sigh audibly as you enter in the last data on this page, just seven more to go.
“You know what?” He suddenly exclaims, slapping the back of your chair ”We’ve done enough for tonight. We shouldn’t be holed up here all night. Go on home (Y/N)” You lean back in the chair, tilting your head all the way backward to look at him. “You’re the best, Dr. Malcolm. I think my fingers are about to fall off.” You sigh, your brows knit together. He laughs, turning the chair and shooing you out the door.
“Go on, go out and have fun or whatever young people do. See you Monday.”
“See you Monday Dr. Malcolm.” You wave him goodbye as you walk to your dorm. Your roommate had let you know which bar she was going to, and it was still early enough to quickly change and meet up with her there. Easy peasy, your Friday night could still be saved. 
- Chapter 2 -
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whump-on-a-string · 9 months ago
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Based on that Ask about if it's Parish who usually patches up my blorbos. The answer is Yes.
Parish has been dealing with Dallan's tendency to run into unfortunate shenanigans for the past 10 or so years. Dallan would probably have died a long time ago if he weren't pals with/working for a very good elven doctor. Poor dude's got Chronic Whumpee Disease.
ANYWAYS. What really started it was a dinner party Dr. Parish and a half-elf friend attended at Mr. Richard's greathouse. Dallan was just the lil resident servant boy cinnamon roll who took their coats & stuff. The head maid wasn't a fan of how the half-elf friend was critiquing her methods of keeping her staff busy so she tried to play a bit of a prank on him by messing with his food that backfired horrendously and nearly killed Wolf (and littol babby Dallan by proxy because Wolf was sharing his snacks because look at him. He was just so smol and helpful and looked like he needed a lil treat 🥺)
Doctor Parish was furious.
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kiwimuichiro · 9 months ago
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Anime/manga characters that are aromantic!
Yuu - Bloom into you - canon aro
Maki - Bloom into you - canon aroace
Luffy - One piece - canon aroace
Saiki K - The Disastrous Life of Saiki K - Canon aroace
Asano Tomoko - Konya sukiyaki dayo - canon aromantic
Yuriko - I Want to Be a Wall - Canon aroace
Uno Hinako & Asahi Satou - Doughnuts under a crescent - aroace coded
Fujisaki - Cherry Magic! Thirty Years of Virginity Can Make You a Wizard - canon aroace
Chika - Is love the answer? - Canon aroace
Shinobu ishii - Is love the answer? - Canon AAA (agender, ace, aro)
Kai - Umi ga hashiru end roll - canon aroace
Senku Ishigami - Dr stone - aro coded
Kashikawa - Sex ed 120% - canon aroace
Amiru - Last Gender: When We Are Nameless - Canon aroallo
Shouko Tanimoto - the case files of jeweler richard - canon aroace
Please tag any characters I have missed
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