#Douglas (Jerk with a girlfriend who is too good for him)
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Off the top of my head oooo Tucker. Tucker, Tucker, Tucker.
"Middle child" of a friend group of kings who's the unruly, improper one of the group. You don't know much about his backstory other than "My dad used to be king, but he was horrible, so overthrew and exiled him." Come to find out it wasn't just his dad who was exiled but his nine older brothers who start coming back into his life after seven or so years. As you get to know the brothers, you discover that they're all (save for one who's still figuring things out, but even he isn't necessarily bad) decent people. Very broken, some more than others, but decent men. Tucker exiling and slandering them made their already terrible lives even worse, and in one brother's case his wife and kids' lives too. As they return and reconnect, he discovers that most of the brothers, except for the one with the family, forgive him for his actions.
It's eventually revealed that his reason for doing this, despite his brothers being nowhere near as evil as his dad, is that he felt abandoned by them. The brothers were close until their mother died, then they drifted apart. Overthrowing his dad was something he'd been planning for a while. Wanting things to go back to how they were and knowing they were ALL miserable, Tucker gave all of his brothers multiple chances to join him, or at least offer help and support. They all refused for reasons ranging from "It's a bad idea" to "I have too much in my own life to worry about now." Once the dust settles, all that remains is a very volatile and emotional 16 year old boy who has just made himself king by force, and his first decree? To send his "evil" family somewhere far, far away, never to be seen again.
I definitely think that if I'm ever fortunate(?) enough to garner a fandom, he'd spark a lot of debate. "He caused a lot of suffering because of a selfish decision he made and doesn't deserve forgiveness" vs. "He was a traumatized 16 year old pumped full of adrenaline when he made said decision and is trying to make things right now."
question for oc enjoyers: which of your ocs would spark a debate so heated it got an entire fandom poll tournament shut down
#text#text post#oc#original character#sorry for the rant#i love talking about things I will never realize#oc story#story#long story#honorable mentions#Antonio (Initially meets his love interest by manipulating her into working for him)#Aries (Not a great mother to her future son)#August (FNV dumbass [posted about him before])#Douglas (Jerk with a girlfriend who is too good for him)#Blu (Just...awful. Has committed so many atrocious crimes. The fandom would be side-eying me HARD)#Capricorn (Unlikeable jerk)#Isabella (âWhy are you falling for Antonio when Dante is RIGHT THERE?!â)#Kathy (Crushing on one of her employees)#Levina (Doesn't really earn her happy ending)#Libra (Probably doesn't deserve the forgiveness she ends up receiving)#Mason (Amoral bastard)#Scorpio (He and Virgo probably shouldn't be together)#Selena (Blackmails a child into doing her bidding)#Yin (supposed to be the âgoodâ twin but is honestly an inconsiderate jerk)
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Fake dating/marriage + "Maybe, just maybe, if I get a free drink I might consider talking to you." for Rowaelin PLEASEE
note: thank you for the prompt, love! I'm so sorry this took so long. I'm a little proud of the way it turned out tho. if you'd like to check out my other fics, here's the Masterlist!
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Rowan is exhausted by the time he reaches his apartmentâthe sleepless nights catching up to him. He has had a bad week and he is looking forward to spending his weekend locked up in his bedroom when the sound of a text makes him groan to himself. Rowan only knows one person who still texts him, aware of his dislike for texting. He pulls his phone out to see a message from Aelin: I need a favour. Rowan is tempted to ignore the message but given her hatred for him, it has to be something important if she asked.
He replies: What have you done now? She is a little hellion after all. Rowan regrets the day he agreed to go on a blind date with her.
Lysandra insisted they go on a date together and he had always thought she was beautiful and he'd agreed. The date had gone horrible as could be. Rowan showed up late because of traffic, the food was cold and tasteless and Rowan managed to forget his wallet home. In hopes of redeeming himself, he proposed a romantic walk around the beach and get ice cream except the ice cream shop was closed and it rained, drenching them both in cold water. As if it wasn't bad enough, his car broke down in the middle of nowhere when he tried to drop her off. Ever since, Aelin texts him after every date to give tips on how to not be a total disaster.
And gods, the woman can get under his skin like no one else ever has.
His phone rings, Aelin's name flashing on his screen before he picks up, grateful that for once she decided not to text. She says by way of greeting, "Look, I ran into my ex and mentioned I have a boyfriend. He thinks I'm shitting him and I need you to come "pick me up" so I can shove our relationship in his face. Pleaseeee?" Rowan isn't sure if he's more annoyed or amused.
He settles on amused. "And why do you need me for this? Why only me?"
Aelin huffs in annoyance and there's complete silence on the other line before she admits, "I bragged a little too much about how hot he is and now, no one fits the bill but you." Yep, definitely amused.
"You think I'm hot?"
"You know you're hot. You shouldn't need me to tell you that." Another huff from her side. "So will you help or not?"
Rowan considers it. The idea of hanging up is tempting but she's desperate. He doesn't need her hating him more. "Maybe, just maybe, if I get a free drink, I might consider talking to you." He sits up, still dressed well enough to pick up his girlfriend. "I'll charge extra for pretending to be a perfect boyfriend."
"Name your price."
Rowan only smiles. "I'll let you know when I get there."
The nightclub Aelin's at is close enough to his apartment that it takes less than fifteen minutes to get there. It's an expensive place for people with lavish tastesâthe kind Rowan would never be caught dead at. Everything from drinks to decorations screams Aelin. He's not surprised this is the club she hangs out at. It's as ridiculous and fancy and over-the-top as her. He spots her leaning against a wall, her face turned towards someone.
She wears an off-shouldered black dress with a dangerously high slit in it. Her blonde hair tied in an elegant side bun, she looks prettier than he remembered.
She looks in the middle of a tense, unwanted conversation when Rowan arrived. "Aelin! There you are." He hopes his smile is convincing enough.
Rowan doesn't like the way she looks with her arms crossed over her chest in a defensive manner, her lips pressed into a thin line and eyes trained on the floor. She has shrunk into herself, made herself small and fragile and timid. She looks unlike the fiery spirit who sends him tips on how to plan a good date every so often just out of spite because he fucked up one evening of her life months ago. He decides immediately that he hates whoever makes her feel like this person in front of him because this is certainly not the Aelin he knows.
To his pleasure, Aelin relaxes the moment she notices him. "Rowan! Just the guy I wanted to see." Then she rises on her toes, kissing him on the cheek.
Rowan hoped he looked better than he felt, his insides in a turmoil even once Aelin pulled back. "Sorry I'm late, love. Traffic was insane."
She placed a comforting hand on his arm, jerking her chin towards her companion. "Ro, that's Chaol Westfall. Chaol, this is Rowan. My boyfriend." As if to back her words up, she puts an arm around his waist and pulls him closer. Rowan lets her do as she pleases.
Chaol extends a hand. "Nice to meet you, Rowan. Aelin talks about you a lot."
"Yeah? She didn't mention you much and that's saying something considering we've been dating for almost ten months now." That was around the time the two of them went on that damned date. Chaol couldn't have dated her after the whole thing because thanks to Aelin's insulting little tips, he knows about all the guys she's gone on a date with and if he's as bad as he seems, he'd have remembered Aelin talking about him.
One look at her confirms his suspicions. Aelin quirks an eyebrow when he brings her a drink. You're having too much fun with this whole thing.
Yeah, well, Rowan shrugs, I might as well enjoy this. The guy's an asshole.
Aelin nods, taking another sip of her drink as the three of them decided to sit down for drinks. Rowan is feeling underdressed in this place, especially with Aelin looking like a literal goddess by his side.
Chaol beats around the bush with easy questions about his job and all until: "No offense, Rowan, but you don't seem like Aelin's usual type."
"None taken. People's tastes do tend to improve over time." Aelin chokes on her drink and Rowan feels a little bad for being mean to a man he barely knows but then he remembers the way Aelin looked when he entered and the flushed look on Chaol's face makes his forget about all the shit he's had to deal with this week. He probably shouldn't be having as much fun with this as he is.
Aelin loops an arm around Rowan's. "I think we should go home now." She downs the rest of her shot in one big gulp before rising from her seat.
She turns towards Rowan, eyes shining under the dim lights of the private booth. She smells of alcohol and something sweet and floralâjasmine, maybe?âeyes shining alight with a question he can read in her eyes, a small smile playing on her lips. Can I kiss you?Rowan can feel Chaol's eyes fixed on his back but when he nods, he finds that it has little to do with pissing a stranger off and a lot to do with Aelin.
Aelin kisses him and his whole world erupts into fireworks. From the second their lips touch, there's only her and her lips and her hands roving his back and that gods damned scent driving him insane. He doesn't know why she's kissing him but Rowan is not kissing her to piss someone off or to prove a point. He wonders how this evening would've played out if that night hadn't gone to shitâif this kiss would have been real instead of pretend, if they would have lasted ten months. He's terrified of finding out.
Rowan almost groans when he pulls back. The grin on her face strikes him stupid. She whispers in his ear, "How's that for payment?" Aelin grabs his hand, leading him out of the club.
He doesn't spare a look at Chaol, doesn't miss a single beat as he replies: "Hmm, I need more for all the insults I pulled." They are almost outside when Rowan continues, "How about a chance? I want a chance to change your mind. You, me, another date. I'm sorry the last one went as bad as it did and you probably hate me and you're gonna say no, of courseâ"
"I don't hate you."
He's not sure he heard her right. "Huh?"
"I don't hate you," Aelin repeats. "None of that was your fault. It was a bad day is all. I waited two weeks for you to ask me out again to make up for it though. When you didn't, I took matters into my own hands to text you about the only thing I could think of."
Rowan gapes. "Pardon? You're telling me the whole tips ploy was what? A ruse?" His mouth hangs open.
"To keep us talking, yes. Besides, it was fun pissing you off," Aelin says.
He did always think it was strange how for someone who claimed to be so mad about having wasted one evening on a bad date, she sure spent a lot of time sending him tips and bantering with him over texts afterwards. He had apologized to her numerous times afterwards but he'd never considered that she might still want another date. To think of all the months he'd wasted.
He shakes his head but he's smiling. "Will you go on a date with me, Aelin?"
She chuckles, face brightening. "I can honestly say there's nothing I want more." As the two of them part ways, Aelin kisses him on the cheek. Rowan watches her leave silently, a big smile on his face. No more wasting time, he promises himself.
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I quite like this and I hope you did too. let me know if you'd like to be tagged. If you haven't already, check out my 1K celebration.
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#rowan whitethorn galathynius#rowan whitethorn#throne of glass fanfiction#throne of glass#aelin ashryver galathynius#aelin ashryver#sarah j maas#sjm fandom#kingdom of ash#modern au#aelin-queen-of-terrasen#chaol westfall#tower of dawn#yrene westfall#rowaelin#fanfiction#aelin and rowan#rowan x aelin#headcanons#tog#incorrect tog quotes#tog fandom#tog incorrect quotes
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Headcanon: Matt and Randy are overworked underappreciated sanitation workers who have had enough and are ready to snap
Will you except HCs on being overworked and underappreciated as a Technician and an Intern? Bc thatâs all I apparently know how to write ):
Please accept these HCs of two out of three of my favorite Solos (you can read these as Sunny or as Randyâs girlfriend đ)
Matt has a wife, he has kids, and he still spends all of his free time at this fucking job.
He gets a day off, heâs called in, he requests a day to himself, it gets declined. He calls out sickâ he gets told he better be there on time.
He started off as one of the worst technicians at Starkiller, but over the years heâs definitely worked his way up as head technician and now nothing ever stops.
He missed Douglas getting his first home run. He missed Felixâs first goal. He missed your speech at your graduation. And heâs getting fucking sick of it quite frankly.
He has half a notion to quit. But knowing his paycheck is paying most of the household bills, he sticks it out and lets himself jerk his frustrations off in the shower.
Until fucking Randy asks him if theyâre keeping him until all hours of the evening too. And Matt canât fucking stand it.
He goes into the main office, demanding he gets his vacation time and just to leave him the fuck alone for a week. He wants to actually watch his kids grow up.
And maybe he gets some head after he explains the story to you, because you think heâs hot and a week together really sounded nice.
Randy rides on Mattâs coat tails for the most part. Everyone knows Matt, and even if his attitude sucks half the timeâ heâs a good fucking worker. Randyâs a shitty intern, but no one really wants to piss Matt off.
So he gets the bitch work. What none of the other interns want to do, eventually makes its way to Randyâs desk.
He may off handedly bring up the fact that he feels like heâs burnt out to you one evening at dinner. And you feel like youâve absolutely been crushed to see him like this.
When Randy brings it up to Matt, he just nods his head and comes up to him later saying heâs got a weeks vacation and not to fucking bug him on his.
#glassbxttless adcu#glassbxttless#matt the radar technician#matt solo#randy the intern#randy solo#randy solo x reader#Matty solo x reader
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prompt: âpilot.â for the weeklong #ProjectTheresa fanfiction challenge!
this one ran away from me and got super long so Iâm throwing it under a cut
âDouglas, if you could, would you mind checking on G-ERTI? Iâve got to see about these blasted NOTAMs...something about thunderheads over DresdenâŚâ
âCertainly, Martin. No rush.â
Douglas closed the door. Walking down the ramp, he muscled a luridly-yellow safety vest over his shoulders. As he headed for the hangars, he absentmindedly ran the thin mesh between his fingers.
This, admittedly, ranked high in the listing of Strange Arrangements. Martin, though finally able to fly for a living, still considered aviation as a hobbyâthus, the Arrangement. On the off chance that Swiss Air wasnât busy sending him off on tours to the corners of Godâs green earth, Martin would wheedle a jumpseat to England from a colleague, bring his royal girlfriend along, and fly with OJS to give Herc some semblance of time off.Â
Douglas frowned a little as he passed by the first set of hangars. Speaking of...where was Theresa, anyhow?
He shook his head. Sheâd slipped away with a safety vest, expressing a desire to wander around the airfield. Douglas and Martin, meanwhile, had devoted themselves to filling out paperwork for the dayâs flightâjust like old days.
Passing the last hangar, Douglas looked both ways before crossing onto the apron. G-ERTI was on stand outside their hangar, gleaming in the morning light. Before, Douglas had definitely been the type of pilot to joke that he didnât care so much about the planeâs exterior aesthetics since he spent most of his time inside of it, but now he had to admit: something as simple as a new paint job really did wonders. The old bird was nearly unrecognizable, looking half its age. Flying like it, too, if anyone was asking Douglas.
He crossed around to the fore of the aircraft, to start his inspection at the radome. As he went to face G-ERTI head-on, he noticed another figure in a safety-yellow vest, examining their number two engine.
Douglas peered intently at the figure before abandoning his walk-around and stepping closer. âYour Highness. GrĂźezi.â
Theresa whirled around and blushed a little. âOh! Hello, Douglas.â
âYou were interested in the engine?â Douglas indicated it with a jerk of his head.
Theresa nodded, looking back at it. She seemed a little embarrassedâor at least uneasy. The two of them hadnât talked in person much since those terrible days when theyâd thought that it was all over. And of course, he couldnât forget the first time theyâd spokenâover the phone at this very airfieldâwhen heâd had a bit of a laugh at her expense.
But he also remembered that sheâbarely hours after theyâd first met face-to-faceâhad covered for them when they were burning off fuel. Sheâd been there for the auction, gamely climbed into the back of Arthurâs van, and was currently here for Martin.
He sought to make her feel a bit more comfortable. âMartinâs told you about how we got this engine, yes?â
Her eyes lit up. âSt Petersburg? Of course. Many times.â
Douglas stifled the urge to laugh a little. âI can imagine.â
âHe also loves to talk about you. How you tricked...erm. Carolynâs ex-husband.â
âOh. Yes.â Douglas chose not to analyze too deeply, and managed a noncommittal shake of his head. âWell, I. Youâve seen it. I do have some tricks up my sleeve for such occasions.â
She smiled and turned her attention back to the engine. âYou seem to have plenty of tricks up your sleeve for all occasions. Such is...such is what Martin tells me.â
Silence fell between them again. He focused on a Gulfstream taxiing to the runway.
âEr, DouglasâŚâ
âYes.â He pulled his gaze away from the plane and looked back at the princess.
âIs it okay if I touch it?â
âTouch what.â
âThe...er. The blades?â
âYou want to see if they spin?â
She blushed again, and this time the embarrassment was evident. âYes.â
âGo on ahead.â
She reached up and pushed against one of the blades, startling a little when the fan began to spin slowly.Â
âDidnât expect that?â Douglas smiled at her surprise.Â
âNo, I didnât. Itâs that easy?â
âYep. Now imagine it spinning at God-knows-how-many-revolutions-per-second at thirty-five thousand feet.â
She must have taken the command literally, because after a few long seconds, her eyes widened. âWow.â
âExactly.â
âDo you think of that...when you fly?â Theresa turned back to him curiously.Â
âWant to find out?â Douglas shot back. She looked a little confused, so he clarified. âWant to learn how to fly?â
Her eyes lit up again. âReally?â
âYeah. Iâm sure Iâve got enough knowledge to indoctrinateâof course, I mean educateâsomeone who wants to learn.âÂ
âReally?â She turned up the voltage in her eyes. âIâd love to!â
âWell, but I canât start nowâŚâ Douglas tried to bring her back down to earth. Enthusiasm. That was what she and Martin seemed to have in common when it came to aviation. No wonder, then, that theyâd become close. âFor starters, Iâm not an instructor yet. A few classes, and I think Iâll be able to add the qualification to my license.â
Theresa nodded, looking a little chastened. âOf course.â
âAndâwell, thereâs the arrangement,â he pointed out. âYouâre not going to get a very consistent education, seeing as you and Martin only come here every so often.â
âYes. Thatâs right.â She looked down.
âOh, donât look like that!â He hadnât meant to discourage her, and he attempted now to rectify his mistake. âWe can figure something out. Thereâs multiple ways to get a transport license, assuming thatâs what you want. You could go about it in a modular fashionâno need to come into a classroom a set number of days per week or anything like that. In any case, youâd be smashing as a pilot. Youâve got Martin, first of allâI think heâd be happy to coach you through revising for theoretical examinations, so youâre basically set on that front.â
She nodded, fidgeting with the hem of her vest.
âWeâll figure it out.â Suddenly, Douglas remembered the task Martin had delegated him. âActually, we could even start now, if youâd like. Have you ever been on a walk-around?â
â
Some months later, Martin and Theresa were back in England. By this time, Douglas had a flight instructor rating, a night instructor qualification, and a multi-engine piston instructor qualification added to his transport pilotâs license and a fuel tester in his pocket.
They met in the main lobby of Fitton Airfield, fluorescent lights gleaming off the glass counter where logbooks and charts were sold. As Douglas warmed his hands with a styrofoam cup of coffee, Theresa picked out a black logbook with green pages. After bidding farewell to Martin, she followed Douglas out to one of the Cessna 152s the airfield kept for instruction.
âIt looks so small up close,â she observed as they approached the plane. âSo light.â
âThatâs why we tie the wings down,â Douglas gestured. âThe plane could, quite literally, fly away in a wind.â Noticing her shocked look, he smiled. âYeah. The wings work, even on the ground. Itâs not that noticeable in a bigger plane, like G-ERTI, and even more for the biggest planes. But the wings are working all the time.â
He walked her around the plane and explained what he was looking for, similarly to their last meeting. She pulled off the pitot cover as he explained to her that if the pitot was not adequately protected, the airspeed indicator could fail. Douglas pulled out the fuel tester and drew out some liquid from the bottom of the tank. He held it to the sky and called Theresa over to look for water with him, cautioning her against allowing water into the fuel tank. She nodded, eyes wide.
Finally, he opened the planeâs door. âWatch your head.â
Theresa climbed in eagerly, and Douglas set about untying the wings before following her inside. Until that point, everything had gone smoothly, but he somehow had a more difficult time squeezing himself into the small plane than usual.
âItâs not exactly G-ERTI,â he excused himself as he tried to find the room to place his legs without bumping into the yoke. Whoever had used this plane before was, evidently, either a hobbit or an instructor much shorter than he.
Theresa stifled a laugh, sliding on a pair of sunglasses.
Once heâd finally gotten settled, he got on his headset, handed the other to Theresa, and quizzed her on the instruments. Evidently, Martin had prepared her wellâor sheâd been waiting for this moment for most of her life.
They whipped through a checklist and had the engine started in no time, and Douglas decided it was about time to get into the air. âLetâs check the brakes. Push forward a little.â
âThe throttle? I can touch that?â
âGo ahead.â
Theresa reached down for the throttle and gave the plane a little bit of power.
âRolling forward. Good. Now take the power back. Brakes.â
Theresa did as she was told. âGood,â Douglas complimented her, and she smiled. âIâll check the brakes on my side.â
They went over how to transfer control to each other, and at last, Douglas directed her to get the power up and turn onto the main taxiway.
Her hand instinctively went to her yoke.
âRudder. Use the rudder,â Douglas advised gently.
âOh. Yes, right.â She took her hand off.
âGood. Stay on the center.â He slung his left arm over the back of her seat and directed her.
âOkay.â
They taxied around the airfield until Theresa could comfortably turn and stay on the centerline without confusing the rudder pedals and yoke. âItâs not like driving,â he advised at one point. âThe yoke looks a little too much like a steering wheel, granted, but thatâs something youâve got to overcome. Rudder pedal. You turn with the rudder.â
âSo yoke for roll, rudder for yaw?â
âPrecisely.â
Finally, Douglas directed Theresa toward the main runway, got in touch with Carl, and asked for clearance to take off.
Carl granted it with the bare minimum of dallying, and Douglas grinned. âOkay, Theresa, weâre going up. Follow the yellow line.â
âWhat! Already?â Her eyebrows climbed up her forehead as she looked at him.
âYes. Youâre doing wonderfully. Iâll help you. Keep following the yellow line.â
They checked that the horizon was lined up, and Douglas directed her to push the throttle forward. âFull power. Keep looking outside. Stay on the center line.â
âOkay.â
âGood.â
Their speed climbed. Forty knots, fifty knotsâŚ
âSixty, sixty-fiveâPull back. Pull the controls back. Gently. Go on.â
Theresa pulled back on the yoke, and the ground peeled away from beneath them.
âWeâre off!â In Douglasâs headset, he heard a distant cheer from Carl in ATCâand, from the sound of it, Martin.
âIâm doing it!â Theresaâs exclamation sounded not unlike one Martin would make, and he suppressed a grin. He could feel them rolling a little, but before Douglas could tell Theresa to do so, she was correcting it.
âGood. Now adjust your pitch angle. Weâre a little too steep and might stall. And as interested as I am in seeing how you handle your first, Iâm not keen on doing it so low and so close to the airfield. Not to mention this is your first lesson.â
âOkay.â She lowered the nose.
âPerfect.â
They climbed to a thousand feet and went through the climb checklist. Douglas put his hands on his own yoke and adjusted for her. âDonât forget to fly the plane, Theresa.â
âOh, yes, right. Sorry.â
âItâs okay. Just keep flying. Our goal now is to get this plane stable enough so that you could take your hands off the yoke, and the plane would just keep going on its own. Theyâre designed to be stable.â
They climbed further to about fifteen thousand feet, and after a good round of coaching, Theresa managed to keep the plane stable enough to take her hands off. After congratulating her, Douglas had her turn a few times, climb twice, and descend twice before taking control and bringing them back to Fitton to land.
Martin was there to meet them at stand, smiling in his luridly-yellow vest. âHowâd it go?â he asked as soon as Douglas and Theresa had finished shutdown and piled out of the plane.
âThe landing was smooth,â Douglas lazily passed the pitot cover to Theresa.
âYou landed,â Theresa retorted, grabbing it out of his hand. Douglas laughed a little.
âReally, though,â he stopped her before they all went back to the portakabin. âYou did well.â
She smiled.
â
Over their next productive (albeit sporadic) meetings, Douglas managed to help Theresa master slow flight. Though she was not what others might call a ânaturalâ at flying, she could certainly absorb information better than most. After their sixth or so flight, Theresa could talk to Carl, work the trim wheel, manage a stall, recover from a spin without too much difficulty, and land visually.
Douglas, overall, was quite pleased with Theresaâs progress, especially for someone who was mostly restricted to ground schooling.Â
Heâd told her that she could very well find an instructor in Switzerland that could help her betterâone who could teach her in German and be more regular with flight lessonsâbut sheâd insisted on staying under his tutelage for the time being, which slightly flattered Douglas. Â
Andâmore importantlyâover the past few months, theyâd gotten to talking between teaching moments, and by this point Douglas could, with certainty, call her a friend.Â
They were going up today, in slightly poorer weather than usual, to review some of the concepts theyâd covered thus far in less ideal conditions. As far as Douglas was concerned, and based on the relative ease with which Theresa had been able to manage previous challenges, this was going to be a simple review flight.
âGolf Mike Bravo,â Carl told Theresa from ATC, âPiper Cub three miles on final approach. Cleared for immediate take-off.â
Theresa flicked the transmit button. âCleared for immediate take-off, Golf Mike Bravo.â
âGood,â Douglas rubbed his hands together as Carl signed off. âRight, Theresa. Letâs get ourselves out of here before that Piper comes in.â
âOkay.â
In no time at all, they were in the airâbut today, Theresa seemed to have a little trouble getting the Cessna into stable flight.Â
âTrim back,â Douglas advised her. âThe plane wants to go up; notice how youâre trying to fight to keep the nose down? Remember, we canât get any higher and enter Bravo airspace.â
âI know that. Iâm sorry.â
âYouâre porpoising,â he said gently a few minutes later, noticing how the nose kept rising and dipping. Theresa was probably still fighting the aeroplane. âNow youâve got to trim forward.â
âRight! Right. Got it. Sorry.â Her tone had grown a little more prickly, and he noticed that the hand that reached back for the trim wheel was shaking slightly.
âItâs okay,â he tried to soothe, ârelax, just correct yourself and keep on flying.â
He had her climb, descend, and turn for a while, then had her complete a checklist while he kept a hand lightly on the yoke.Â
âTheresa, weâre rolling a little. Watch your attitude indicator. I didnât ask you to bank.â
Theresa nodded, but kept going through the checklist.
âTheresa. You need to scan.â
âRight, Iâm going to.â
âOne of your wings is higher than the other.â
âWhat?â Her hand flew to the yoke, and she corrected the plane.
âYou need to scan,â Douglas admonished. âRemember the T.â He pointed to the instruments heâd drilled her on months ago, forming a T on the controls.Â
âRight, okay, Iâm going to.â The prickle was back, and Douglas tried to stand down.
âOkay,â he directed in what he hoped was a calm tone. âIâll have you do one last climbing turn, and then weâll go and find a field we can practice spin recovery over.â
Heâd thought it would be easy enoughâsheâd certainly done plenty of them before. But for some reason, today was different.
âTheresa! Your climb angle is too high. You need to scan!â he turned fully towards her in alarm as a stall warning began to blare.
Evidently startled by both his outcry and the stall warning, Theresa abruptly let go of the controls and screamed.
The plane, being a Cessna 152 and therefore the epitome of stalwart reliability, corrected itself and carried on happily scuttling across the English sky as if nothing had ever happened. Douglas was left to stare at Theresa, whoâd buried her face in her hands, completely ignoring the panel in front of her.
He stared at her for what felt like thirty nautical miles before he cleared his throat, something like disappointment curdling in his chest.
âMy controls. Weâre going back to Fitton.â
âWhat?â She looked up at him, her eyes wide with shock.
âWeâre going back to Fitton. I have control.â
And without waiting for her to confirm the handover, Douglas took hold of his yoke, dialed up the Fitton beacon, and began navigating back to the airfield.
â
âHey, Martin.â Douglas opened the portakabin door, poked his head inside, and knocked on the wallâall while blocking Theresa from entering.Â
âDouglas, whatââ she yelped from behind, bumping into him.Â
Martin took off his headphones and looked up from his charts, face brightening. âDouglas! Youâre back? Whereâs Theresa?â His face took on a confused expression. âEverything all right? That was rather quick.â
âMartin, get me my jacket.â
âWhat?â Martin stared, mouth agape.Â
âDouglas, let me in!â Theresa tried to squeeze past him. Finding that difficult as heâd wedged himself between the door and the doorway, she thumped him on his back. âIâm not a child.â
âTheresa?â Martin called out. âWhatâs happened?â
âIâm going to borrow your girlfriend, Martin,â Douglas said calmly. âGet me my jacket.â
âWhat!â
âBorrow meâDouglas, let me inââ
âDouglas! What do you mean, what do you wantââ
Douglas sighed heavily. âI need my jacket.â
âYouâve said that already, something like three times. Will someone please tell me what is going on? And did you just say you wanted to borrow my girlfriend?â
âIâm going to debrief the flight.â
âWhat do you mean? You can do it in here.â
âI mean, Martin,â Douglas burst out, suddenly losing patience, âsomething happened up there today, and we need to talk about it like adults, so I am going to bring Theresa somewhere nice and relaxing to have something to eat and drink and then weâll talk it out.â He held out a hand. âWonât take more than an hour. Now please. I need my keys. Get me my jacket, will you?â
Theresa stopped trying to worm past Douglas, and Martinâs expression changed into one of stunned shock. He rose, grabbed Douglasâ jacket off a hook, and handed it to him.
âThank you, Martin. Theresa,â he turned to the princess. With a single shocked glance at Martin, she followed him down the ramp.Â
âWhat exactly are we doing?â she dared to ask as he walked over to his Lexus.
âExactly what Iâve just said to Martin. Weâre going somewhere nice to have something to eat and drink and then weâll talk about what happened today.â As he unlocked his car he realized that he was commanding a Princess; the humorous irony of this moment, however, would have to wait for another time. âHave a seat.â
âYou realize this looks a lot like youâre kidnapping the princess of Liechtenstein.â She gaped at him over the roof of the sedan.
âYouâre the one walking into the car, not me,â Douglas pointed out. âI am, in fact, very courteously unlocking the door and opening it for you as you gracefully sit in my car. Now come on. We should go. We have much to talk about.â
A former colleague from Air England had set up a coffeehouse a town over that sold food and drink at a reasonable price, having been declared unfit to fly by his GP due to worsening astigmatism.Â
Which was where he was heading now.
As he turned into the car park, he remembered that he was not in an aeroplane and wrenched off his tie, tossing it into the back seat. âLetâs go,â he said without looking at Theresa.
âOkay.â
They silently crossed the car park and Douglas opened the front door for Theresa.
âDouglas! Havenât seen you in ages.â The man was drying a mug behind the counter and waved eagerly as they walked in.
âMorning, Jeremy. Just dropping in.â
âSure. Whoâs this?â Jeremy indicated Theresa with a tilt of his head.
âA student.â Douglas kept his replies short. âIâm debriefing our flight.â
âGracious, youâre teaching now?â
âOn a limited basis.â Douglas offered a chair to Theresa in the back corner. âIf you donât mindâŚâ
âNo problem.â Jeremy turned away.
Theresa nodded distractedly and sat across from Douglas.
âIâll get you something. What would you like?â Douglas turned to Theresa. âSomething to drink, something to eatâŚâ
She twisted around a bit to look at the display case of various baked goods. âI think...erm. An ĂŠclair?â
âNothing to drink?â
Strangely, Theresa paled a little. âJust water.â
âYouâre sure?â
âJust...water,â she glared lightly, and Douglas was vaguely reminded of her barking, âI am Theresa Gustava Bonaventura, Countess of Sponheim and Protector Extraordinary of the Cantons of Nimes!â into G-ERTIâs satcom.Â
âOkay. Okay, sorry.â He put his hands up in a gesture of deference and headed to Jeremyâs post to get some food.
Some minutes later, he sat back in front of Theresa and handed her the ĂŠclair and water sheâd requested. Jeremy went to talk to another customer in order to give them some semblance of privacy.
âThank you.â
Douglas waited until they were both about halfway through their respective coffee/pastry before he started speaking.
âSo. Letâs unpack what happened up there today,â he kept his tone low and calm. In front of him, Theresa clammed up a little, but he forged on. âCan you tell me, in your own wordsâŚâ
âWho elseâs words would I use?â Theresa interjected, then her ears turned red. âWellâŚâ She thought for a second, then continued. âI didnât have a problem getting off the ground, but I was having trouble...I was having trouble getting the plane trimmed to...to equilibrium. Then I did some climbing and turning, and that was okay, but then you asked me to do a checklistâŚâ
âRight, and what happened then?â
âI wasnât watching the plane, and it came out of its equilibrium.â
âThatâs correct. And then?â
âYou asked me to do a climbing turn, and I did, but I made a stall warning because I wasnât scanning, and thenâŚâ
She trailed off.
âRight. Thatâs all true.â Douglas took a sip of his coffee. âNow. I know you knew how to do everything I asked you to. This was supposed to be a review flight, remember? I wouldnât have let you go up in todayâs conditions if you didnât know how to do what I asked you toâthe bit of cloud and all. So.â He put his cup down. âWhatâs going on that you donât want to tell me about?â
âWhat do you mean?â
âI mean what was on your mind? Has anything happened between...has anything happened between you and Martin?â He dreaded to hear the answer.Â
âWhat? No. No, weâre fine! Everythingâs fine with us.â Her tone had abruptly grown defensive.
âOkay, okay.â Douglas tamped down the relief. âWhat Iâm saying is, somethingâs probably set you off...Theresa. Itâs like driving.â A thought occurred to him. âWait, do you know...do you know how to drive?â
âFor emergencies, yes. I was taught the basics a long time ago.â
âWell, you know how you wouldnâtâyou shouldnât drive when youâre unwell? Not just physically. Emotionally, too? Mentally?â
She nodded.
âSame with flying. You shouldnât be flying if youâre not well. You shouldnât have been up in the air at all today on that logic. Which begs the question.â He leaned forward. âYou seem physically well. Youâre mentally sound. Theresa...whatâs wrong?â
Suddenly, she couldnât meet his eyes.
âCome on, Theresa,â he urged. âWeâre friendsâat least,â he tacked on hastily, seeing the look that passed across her face, âa friend of Martinâs is a friend of mine, and youâveâyouâve really been here for us, on quite a few occasionsâŚâ He sensed that he wasnât getting his point across. âWhat Iâm trying to say isâŚâ He took a breath, reached across the table, and grasped her hand, which was lying limply next to her ĂŠclair. Her gaze whipped to him. âYou can trust me. You can trust us. Whatâs happened?â
âOh. Oh...I...Scheisse.â Theresa ripped her hand away and covered her face again. Douglas sat back and bit his lip, letting her talk when she wanted to.
Finally, she gulped, sat on her hands, and looked at Douglas. âDouglas. IâŚâ
âTake your time. Itâs okay.â
âDouglas...I think...Iâm not saying, but I just think...I might be...Martin and I...well. I...might be pregnant.â
His jaw dropped. When the realization kicked in, he gasped and then grinned. The thought of a mini-Martin or a mini-Theresa was, frankly, incredibly endearing. âOh my God! Congratulationsââ
âNo!â She shook her head rapidly. âWait, no, I meant, not that I donât want the congratulations, I mean no, it is not good, this is not good. Even though Iâm only thinking I might...oh, itâs just bad! Itâs really, really bad!â With shaking hands, she clutched at her curling hair like she was about to pull it out and looked at him, her hazel eyes desperate.
âWhat? How?âÂ
âWeâre...Martin and I arenât married! If weâre having a child, right now, itâs going to be regarded as an illegitimate child since weâre not married! And my familyâs already angry enough at meââ
âWhy would they be upset with you, for Godâs sake? Youâre running a microstate in your teenage brotherâs stead, Iâd say thatâs more remarkable than a given person of your ageââ
âLet me finish!â Theresa hissed. Douglas knew her frustration wasnât directed at him, but his interruption wasnât exactly helping. He fell silent with an apologetic, deferential nod. âSorry. Yes, I know I run the country, but Iâm just waiting for Maxie to finish his education and take it overâthere was a constitutional crisis just to allow me to become his regentâthey were going to give the state to a ten-year-old! I couldnât possibly let them do thatâbut there are older...more...more conservative members of the royal family that...that donât like that Iâm doing this. And...Iâve never actually wanted to be...listen, I just donât want to beâŚI donât like politics. I never have, and you know I wanted to be a pilot. But I do...what I do! Because I have toâŚâÂ
Shakily, she picked up her paper table napkin and began to fidget with it. âAnd whatâs worse...Swiss Air...Martin tells me theyâre debating expanding to a hub in London, and...I want him to apply to be domiciled there. Thereâs a good chance theyâll let him, since heâsâheâs English, no matter how many times he reassures me that heâll try to gain Liechtenstein citizenshipâŚâ
âHold on. Citizenship?â
âAnother problem. We talked to the archbishop of Vaduz. Martinâs not Liechtensteiner or royal, so one of those has got to give if weâre going to marryâand if any of our children are going to have any sort of claim to the throne. Itâs not like I care about that last part, but the familyâs going to make us suffer for itâŚâ
âWait, why would you want Martin to be domiciled here if Swiss Air opens a hub?â
âBecause...I think it might be better for him. Heâd be close to family, away from the worst of my relatives...not to mention close to you all.â
âAnd what about you?â Douglas stared across the table at her.
She sighed. âI...I would want to come with him if that happens. I've had...I have plans set up but Iâve never told anyone about them, not even MartinâŚI havenât told anyone except Martin about me possibly being pregnant...â
âAgain. Theresa. You can trust me.â
She gazed at him, openmouthed, then gave a âmight-as-well-get-it-over-withâ sort of shrug and continued. âWell, my next sisterâsheâs only a few years younger than meâshe actually wants political life, sheâs actually interested in running a country. Sheâd be overjoyed if I passed the regency to her. But after instating a constitutional crisis, Iâd be expected to see the regency through, and that wouldnât happen for...a few years yet. My God, itâs all so complicated, and Iâm making no sense at allâŚâ
By this point, the paper napkin was worried to bits on the table.Â
Douglas sat there for a while, trying to figure out how to respond.Â
âTheresa,â he began at last.Â
âYes?â
âWhatever happens...whatever you choose to do, and whatever you and Martin choose to do. You...you have a home here. Both of you. Really.â It wasnât about flying now, this conversation. It wasnât about mistakes, it wasnât about pilot licenses or anything of the sort. This was different. This was family. âAnd if certain family members are being horrible...who cares about them? Weâll be your family. You have aâyou have a refuge with us. Youâll be fine. You and Martin both.â
She looked dubious, for just a second, and then she looked relieved.
âThatâs better,â Douglas soothed. âYouâll be fine. You will be.â
âThank...thank you.â
âItâs the least I can do.â He stretched across the table and grasped his friendâs hand againâand this time she didnât pull away.Â
They smiled.Â
A week or so later, after Theresa and Martin had returned to Zurich, he received a message.
Iâm not pregnant. Iâm okay, turns out it was a scare after all. I am truly sorry for the dramatics that day. Theresa
Iâm glad to hear youâre okay. You are fine. You can always talk if you need it. Douglas
Thank you. Theresa
â
âSheâll be fine.âÂ
As Douglas scanned the horizon on the day of Theresaâs first solo flight, Carolyn elbowed him lightly in the side. âHello, Captain Richardson? Do you happen to be in? Sheâll be fine.â
He looked at Carolyn, who had endeavored to put on a reassuring look. âYouâve taught her well. Sheâll be fine.â
âIf I can say,â Herc interjected from Carolynâs other side, âsheâs done well for someone whose flying education has been so sporadic.â
âYes. Loosen up, Douglas,â Carolyn admonished. âShe'll be okay.âÂ
Douglas had let her take him up around Fitton twice before leaving her in the training Cessna to complete her first solo around the traffic pattern. In the distance, he saw her talking to Martin through the open door of the aircraft.Â
Since their conversation a month or so previously, Theresa had made the decision to maintain her regency until Maxieâs coming of age. She and Martin were still discussing the idea of the domicile and marriage, but Douglas had faith that they would make the decision that was best for them.Â
But that wasnât important now, not when Martin had leaned inside and kissed Theresa, his vest stirred by the breeze, before he closed the planeâs door and walked over to meet the rest of the group, standing on the apron in front of the main lobby.
The setting was idealâcommanding a view of both the apron and the main runway.
âHow is she?â Douglas asked a Martin anxiously.
âRelaxed, mostly.â Martin had his hands shoved into his pockets as he came to stand next to him. Douglas resisted the urge to laughâMartinâs face was still a vibrant shade of crimson. âI suppose...mo-more relaxed than me.â He laughed nervously.
Arthur came trotting over as best he could with a plastic bucket in his grip. Water sloshed over the rim.Â
âArthur, dear heartâpray tell me why youâve got that,â Carolyn turned and pointed at the bucket of water.Â
âAh. Well...I may have told Arthur of the tradition of a pilotâs first solo,â Herc replied a bit sheepishly. âThe Americans cut off the shirt-tailâbut we douse the pilot in water.â
âOh, for goodnessâ sake, really?â Carolyn rolled her eyes. âAnd sheâs got on a uniform for the first time too.â
âItâs a rite of passage.â
It was Martinâof courseâthat had suggested Theresa get a uniform for the occasion, citing his own experience going through flight school. Initially, Douglas hadnât even considered itâuntil that point heâd just let her show up in whatever she wanted to wear. However, he and Herc had agreed with Martin, and theyâd pulled together to surprise Theresa with a uniform much like the ones the three of them used for flights with OJS. Martin had had the honor of fastening Theresaâs epaulettes for herâone stripe for now.
Douglas knew he would not be surprised if that one stripe would grow to three or even four.Â
âSheâs starting up her roll,â Martin announced, ever the observant aviator.Â
Douglas watched her initiate her checklist before pulling forward and taxiing towards the runway.Â
Theresa paused at the mouth of the runway, and if Douglas squinted, he could see her take a deep breath before applying power.Â
The Cessna rolled down the runway, leaving the piano keys behind, quickly gaining speed.Â
âRotate,â Douglas murmured under his breath.Â
The front wheel lifted from the ground, and the little aeroplane rose into the sky.Â
âGood start,â Herc assessed. Douglas saw him hold up his finger to form an angle with the ground. âGood angle.â Seeing Douglas watching, Herc looked over and sent him a grin. âYou did well.â
âHurrah!â Arthur jumped up and down excitedly. âThat was brilliant!â
âYes, well,â Martin said. âSheâs got to come back down.â
Douglas nodded. The relief heâd felt upon watching Theresa take off was quickly replaced by a heavy feeling in his throat. Martin was right. For a novice pilot, taking off was easy enoughâlanding, not so much.Â
They craned their heads upward. The little Cessna was following the standard traffic pattern for Fitton, turning and coming back to land.Â
Theresa descended from the sky and approached the runway as Douglas had taught her. He envisioned her as heâd seen her so many times, as they practiced touch-and-go after touch-and-go after touch-and-go: correcting the side-to-side alignment, watching the PAPI lights on the sides of the runway, aiming for the touchdown zone...
âFlare,â Martin called out as Theresa tipped the nose up to increase the angle of attack.Â
âCome on,â Douglas muttered to himself, watching her intently. âPower through the ground effect, donât use up the runwayâ!â
Finally, the main wheels touched the runway, followed by the front wheel, and he knew Theresa was pushing the rudder pedals as hard as she could to get the plane slowed down.
Martin and Douglas cheered at the same time, and Douglas felt Martin cling to him and jump up and down.Â
âShe did it! She did it!â he chorused excitedly.Â
âWell done to you too, Douglas,â Herc said warmly, thumping him on the back.Â
âI must admit, that was exhilarating,â Carolyn added, a hint of pride in her tone.Â
âDouglas, here!â
He turned to Arthur, who shoved the bucket of water at him. Some of it slipped over the edges and wet Douglasâs shoes. âYou should have the bucket since you taught her! Iâll help you if you need it.â
âArthur, dearest, I should think one is enough for that!â
Almost as if in a daze, Douglas accepted the bucket. Theresa had done it. Of course, there was a long way to go in terms of licensing, but the truth still stoodâsheâd defied everything that had stood in her way.Â
She was a pilot now.Â
Finally, she pulled in to stand and, after completing shutdown checks, left the aircraft to slip on the pitot cover and tie down the wings.Â
Martin broke from the group and ran to her, and they followed. Douglas came last of all, heaving the bucket with him.Â
Theresa came to meet them, accepting congratulations from Herc and Carolyn, laughing as Arthur tackled her into a soul-crushing hug, and kissing Martin on the cheek.Â
Finally, she turned to Douglas with a brilliantly relieved grin, and he smiled mischievously at her. Luckily, she had her gaze concentrated on his face, and not the bucket he was trying to hide behind him.Â
âYouâve done well, Theresa. And now, since youâve shown proficiency as a pilot...Iâve got something for youâŚâ
Splash!
âAgh!! Douglas!! Itâs cold!!!â
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Starters "Nothing I ever do is right. Iâm not good enough. Itâs all wrong. Do thisâŚDo that. Be this way. Be That way! Be you,âŚbut not like that!â  Stomping back and forth Nathan spat under his breath before turning and swinging his hand at the lid of a trash can in the alley he had decided to have a little bit of a tantrum in â Fuck you!  I am justâŚnever going to be good enough! I am not, fucking, YOU! Iâm me, and I am fucking pissed off!âŚand if you donât fucking like that! Donât bother pretending we are. âŚWhat kind of brotherâŚLocks himself away in his bedroom, for weeks, because his god damn girlfriend is always out of town. What fucking good is that going to do, you fuckingââ Picking the empty trash can up he flings it out of the alley toward a nearby sidewalk âAsshole! I am right here, after seventeen god damn years! And itâs not good enough for you!⌠Iâll just do everythingâŚMy god damn self⌠Stay, in your useless fucking room, being useless! Itâs fine, I was the one abused, beaten, harassed for seventeen years, but you fucking just be selfish! Your girl friend is obviously more of a priority OUT of town, than I ever will have been, or will be. I am so fucking done!â Turning he kicked another trash can over, spilling out itâs contents onto the alley pavement âIs it too much to ask, for some god damn communication! Apparent-fucking-ly.â You are going to get to know the knuckles of my fist as they hit your face.â
#returned:starter January 18th 2018, 9:33:40 am ¡ a month ago âItâs my birthday. Interesting.â Nathan mumbled a bit absently as he was sitting. He let out a breath then, humming lightly to himself.
#returned:starter 12 notes December 13th 2017, 9:56:01 pm ¡ 2 months ago Staring up into the night sky Nathan watched the white snowflakes fall toward the snow covered ground âHmm.â Squinting a little he tilt his head âFirst time feeling snow in a while.â He muttered, holding up his hands to catch the snowflakes in his hands. With a cute little grin he smiled down at the water building up in his palms. A stab of excitement hit him then. Tilting his head up he stuck his tongue out to catch a few snowflakes. A few seconds later he started to run across the park, still almost childlike. Then he dropped the ground and started to pull snow toward him, crushing some of the snow into snowballs and setting them beside him.
#returned:starter#Ignore the text#or don't lol 10 notes November 24th 2017, 6:22:34 pm ¡ 3 months ago âSheâs got the devils eyes and theyâll cut you like a weapon sheâs stuck in my mind like a bad obsession.â Nathan mused, moving to rest his head in his hand, thinking of Isabella with a small grin â All the boys say she was sent from the heavens but Iâm not too sure that this girl is a blessing.â He continued absently spinning his phone on the table.
#returned:starter#idk ahah 16 notes October 22nd 2017, 10:20:56 am ¡ 4 months ago Placing a hand on his head Nathan closed his eyes tightly, trying to calm himself down. Itâs not real. Iâm justâŚseeing things. Yeah. Just-Just tired. Swallowing he opened his eyes a little before forcing himself to move. Though a moment later he stumbled and bumped into someone who shoved him before shouting at him to watch where he was going  âS-sorry I-I.âUuhhââ Inhaling sharply his arched back, a chill running down his spine and his chest tightening. Twitching he looked around before lifting his hand up and sobbed into it. This is so fucking stupid. I have to get out of here. Why âŚRight now!
#returned:starter#Sunday Starter#yay~ 18 notes October 13th 2017, 11:52:05 am ¡ 4 months ago Sitting lazily in a chair at the hospital Nathan was slouching, his legs opening and closing as he stared in a haze at the tv screen just a few feet away from him. All around him he could hear others talking, but he couldnât exactly make out the words anyone had been saying. It was all just a jumbled mess. Blinking his eyes shift slowly to meet a nurse as they walked over toward him and took a seat. Pulling himself up he moved to drop his head in his hand, groaning lightly as he did. The memory of the hospital melting then as the person who sat beside him asked if he were okay âFine. Just having a bad reaction to the sun.â Standing then he started walking across the park.
#returned:starter 20 notes October 3rd 2017, 1:43:10 pm ¡ 5 months ago Turning the phone over in his hand Nathan looked at the screen full of messages from people he hadnât bothered to answer. Then he just chucked the phone into a nearby body of water before turning and walking away.  Oops.
#returned:starter 2 notes September 24th 2017, 11:54:41 am ¡ 5 months ago Reaching out Nathan touched the mask of a costume and frowned â Hm, itâs almost that time.â  He muttered before pulling the mask down from where it was to get a better look at it, before he then went to put it on. What month is it, September? Then itâs in a month or so. Halloween, fuuuun.
#returned:starter 3 notes September 6th 2017, 5:04:49 pm ¡ 6 months ago Laying on his stomach, over a patch of grass, Nathan had a dorky little grin on his face as he brought over a pretty broken up toy through the air. His eyes shift up, following the toy as he played with it, some what in a haze. His eyes seemed to be big, like a child as he distracted himself. Grinning he laid his head at a tilt on his arm, humming to himself as he continued to move the toy around.
#returned:starter#I don't know what this is#But he needs a starter out there XD 22 notes August 15th 2017, 6:55:42 pm ¡ 6 months ago Pacing, Nathan was chewing on the nail of an index finger,  his bruised face redder from apparently crying.  Brushing his fingers against his lips then he swallowed and paused.  Muttering for a moment to himself before he frowned and dropped his head into his left hand  âSo badâŚsooobaaad.â
#returned:starter 33 notes August 5th 2017, 6:33:22 am ¡ 7 months ago Pulling the hood of his black hoodie up over his head, to hide the bandages and not be easy to spot in case someone wanted to finish the job in killing him. Though he doubted the disguise would work completely, it was all he had. He put on a pair of sun glasses he had stolen not long after waking up in the woods. Then placed the earbuds of his headphones in his ears and started to listen to music while looking at the phone he had been given. It wasnât the most pleasant feeling in the world, the music vibrating through his head, when his skull was cracked and had barely, if at all even healed since it had only been a few days and for some reason, it still was acting like it almost just happened that day. But at the same time the music was calming, it helped a lot. Searching his phone he had been spend a lot of time recently just catching up on stuff he had been missing out in the last sixteen years of his life, and the phone was helping him to do that when he was out on the streets without supervision.
#returned:starter 2 notes July 26th 2017, 3:33:54 pm ¡ 7 months ago Reaching out he tapped on the door in front of him, Austinâs door. He felt awkward being here, honestly. Like an unwanted guest. Like the other just felt obligated because of âbloodâ reasons.  Like they were just trying to put on a show for accidentally forgetting him on purpose because Robert Douglas demanded it so.  Mindlessly he tapped the phone on the door, not really wanting the other to answer, and then he could just leave. After another moment he let out a breath. Feeling hungry he decided he was going to go get something to eat and turned, walking down the hallway. Once back out on the street he winced at the bright sunlight before turning away and walking, only to bump into someone.
#returned:starter 41 notes July 20th 2017, 3:45:50 pm ¡ 7 months ago Laying on his back Nathanâs head was turned to his left, his left hand loosely wrapped around his face as he exhaled gently. His eyes shift under his eyelids as he breathes in, gently.  For the last twenty-four hours, he has done nothing more than sleep. Nathan had become completely consumed by his exhaustion over the last few weeks and his body just needed the rest. Wincing a bit his brows knit together slightly, the sweat on his forehead combining and slipping down the side of his slightly tilted his head. A small whimper escaped his lips as he head suddenly jerked before turning away from his hand, his breathing started to pick up speed as his mind started lighting up with signals to be worried âNo. No. No⌠Donât-â Nathan whispered, his voice cracking.
#Returned:Starter#No idea where he could be laying?#Anywhere honestly ahah 17 notes July 17th 2017, 2:40:31 pm ¡ 7 months ago Sitting outside Nathan dropped onto the grass and pulled his legs up pressing them against his chest as he tried to make himself smaller against the building. So he could hide. Sucking in a deep breath he adjusted his head on his knees. He watched as a bird dropped down and started pecking at the grass a moment later, getting completely absorbed with the creatureâs actions. His current state of mind is easily allowed to be distracted as it was still recovering from the head injuries heâd suffered and the entire mind fuck of Austin and Bethany, mostly Bethany lying to him.
#Returned:911#Returned:Starter#Events 21 notes July 9th 2017, 4:44:45 pm ¡ 7 months ago Walking into the building, or more like being shoved into it, Nathan stumbled âAlright! Jeez, stop fucking touching me!â He snapped before he turned to look around the building. Blinking as some people seemed to stare at him in recognition. Austin. He reminded himself, even though the stitches on his forehead would have been a dead giveaway to anyone paying any sort of attention that he was in fact, not, Austin. Nathan narrowed his eyes on some people as he made his way across the room and then found a space to sit. Taking up a chair he brought his legs up, sitting lotus-style before he lifted up a magazine on guns from one of the tables to his side and started reading through it with little to no interest.
#Returned:911#Um sooo#okay#Hmm#Returned:Starter#Event 19 notes June 30th 2017, 7:51:54 pm ¡ 8 months ago Pushing against the wall of a building Nathan let out a loud shout, it had sounded a bit too much more like a demon than something that would come from a human, as it was shredding his throat as it clawed its way out of him. He then pushed off the wall and paced for a moment before kicking his backpack further back into the alley âThat fucking bitch! I willâŚ-â Cutting off he made a brief strangling motion at the air âIsabellaâŚIsabella⌠Sheâs ruining everything!â Nathan snapped before slamming his right fist into the top of a trash can, sending a bolt of pain up his arm hissing he pulled it away and in a fit of rage picked the empty trash can up off the ground and threw it out toward the street.
#Returned:Starter 23 notes June 24th 2017, 4:17:45 pm ¡ 8 months ago Reaching into a ratty backpack he had lifted out of a trashcan some days ago Nathan pulled up a bag full of days old baked sweets. Of which he had dug out of the trash the other day from behind a bakery.  There wasnât much work for someone who just got out of a mental hospital after all. He narrowed his eyes as he watched people walk by him as he took a bite, feeling as though they knew, and they were judging him and thinking he was disgusting. And so what if he were.  Dropping down onto a bench he hugged the backpack to his thin body and continued to watch people suspiciously âI need money.â Nathan muttered then before watching a few beeâs that were a few feet from him dancing around a flower. Blinking he observed the scene for a few moments before muttering âBeeâŚDoes it still hurtâŚâ to mostly himself. Dropping onto his side he curled up hogging the bench.
Closing his eyes he started to doze off. Which wasnât odd since he could barely even sleep, and sleeping at night was a nightmare waiting to happen so Nathan mostly got his naps in throughout the daytime hours. Â As he was slipping off to sleep he thought about his family and one of the many things he had in store for them, if he could even find them. He didnât have any clue of where they were, of course. He figured this place, Killbourne, was a good place to start finding out. He would continue to try to get a job, and make enough money for gathering tools and items he would need in order to do what he had planned. Then he would search for them. When he would find them he would take all the things he gathered and start setting his plan into action, trapping them all. This was his plan, so far. Sucking in a breath he reached up and pulled the hood of his hoodie down over his eyes to block out the sunlight shining down onto the park he chose to rest in.
Paras austinxdouglas:
Austin had been in his room talking to his girlfriend on the phone. Since sheâd been away heâs been locked up in his room a little more. Heâd really missed her while she was away, when he heard the door closed he didnât bother saying hi to his brother yet. âYea sure, give me a minute.â He replied, after saying goodbye to his girlfriend he hung up and walked into the kitchen. âWhatâs up?â
Listening to his brother chatter away with his girlfriend, he stuck his tongue gently into his upper lip. Had he noticed Austinâs locking the door? Yes. But what else was new, Austin was never going to really, fully understand. Turning toward Austin when the other finally arrived he knocked his head toward them before moving closer to the other, smiling. With a slight tilt of his head he lift the knife up and pointed it toward Austinâs chest,  inches from his twins body, aimed right at a major artery âWhat are the quality of these knives? Do you think they will cut through meat like paper?â Pulling the knife up he frowned a little bit before resting the blade in the palm of his right hand âAre these professional? I bet you donât even knowâŚâ He clicked his tongue at Austin then before turning his head away to look toward the door.
Source: nathan-douglas #Para#AustinPara#Austin 2 notes January 22nd 2018, 4:41:26 pm ¡ a month ago Nathan let out a small breath as he entered the apartment, sighing a little bit as he walked toward the kitchen, moving toward the knives he reached over to pick out one. Lifting it up he looked it over, running a finger on his other hand along the side of it âWhy does he have these, if he doesnât cook?â  Shrugging then he turns, dropping the knife down from his face âAustin, can you come here for just a minute.â
@austinxdouglas
#Para#AustinPara#Austin 2 notes montana-rodes January 22nd 2018, 4:12:40 pm ¡ a month ago nathan-douglas montana-rodes:
Montana shrugged. âSure.â What was so complicated about that? She had gotten rather good at shutting things off over the years. Montana was looking back down at the phone in her hand, pretty uninterested. She herself was quite unfeeling and cold nowadays. She didnât care much for sob stories or people spilling their emotions. As he spoke again, she looked up, not having expected it. Montana had already switched off. He shouldnât have been born. Great. She held back a sigh and stared at him for a moment, not knowing what she could say.
Nathan stared up at her for a moment, unhinging his jaw as she replied to him. Or rather, there was not much of a reply. So there was not much else he could do or say to her. And he wasnât going to stand there and have her looking at him the way she was. Blinking, he nods before he stood up, turned and walked away from her.
Source: nathan-douglas #Para#MontanaPara#Montana 12 notes gemmapearson January 19th 2018, 12:27:57 pm ¡ a month ago nathan-douglas gemmapearson:
Gemma rolled her eyes. Why the fucking hell did he think? She didnât say anything, averting her gaze again and looking down at her nails. âYep. Nothing matters.â
âYou, are a fucking moron. Why donât you take your annoyance and go fucking stand over there.â Â Nathan pointed at the end of the sidewalk, far away from him.
Source: nathan-douglas #Para#GemmaPara#Gemma 12 notes montana-rodes January 19th 2018, 12:20:30 pm ¡ a month ago nathan-douglas montana-rodes:
âJust donât think about it then.â
As she had said that he suddenly looked confused âJust stop thinkingâŚ.About it?â It was a ridiculous suggestion. Of course, he understood she had no idea exactly who she had been talking to. To just stop thinking about something that seemed stupid to her, was like asking him to turn off a light switch. But for him it was like that light switch was on the other side of a fire pit, with some guillotines waiting to chop away at his body, along with poison darts ready to fire into him. The switch always being on the other side of that massive mind field of thinking he had for years armed himself with. And if he should ever make it to that light switch and just âturn offâ the trick was, all he would be met with was fucking electrocution âI canât just stop thinking about it!â He started to giggle before laughing a little too much, a little bit too hard, for a moment. Then he paused before tearing up as a sadness struck him sudden, swelling in his chest, constricting his throat âI shouldnât have been born.â
Source: nathan-douglas #Para#MontanaPara#Montana 12 notes montana-rodes January 18th 2018, 10:54:06 pm ¡ a month ago nathan-douglas montana-rodes:
âYou make it sound like youâd forgotten.â
âIf only it would be so easy to forget I was born. When Iâve spent most of my life asking why I wasâŚI hate this day.â
Source: nathan-douglas #Para#MontanaPara#Montana 12 notes gemmapearson January 18th 2018, 10:52:06 pm ¡ a month ago nathan-douglas gemmapearson:
âWhat?â Gemma looked up, stunned at what heâd even said. She glanced around, panicked. âYou shouldnât say things like that out here.â She hissed as her head spun back round towards him. He should be more careful who he spoke to about being dead these days, regardless of whether Gemma had figured out herself that she was too. âBut no. It doesnât matter.â Nothing mattered.
âOh? Why not?â He blinked then, staring at Gemma for a moment before sighing a little bit âIt doesnât matter.â Frowning a little bit he shrugs a shoulder âI guess thatâs right, this doesnât matter. Nothing Matters.â
Source: nathan-douglas #Para#GemmaPara#Gemma 12 notes gemmapearson January 18th 2018, 2:14:22 pm ¡ a month ago nathan-douglas gemmapearson:
Gemma rolled her eyes as she looked up and saw who it was who was mumbling. Great. Mister Mental. She scoffed, looking away again. As if she actually gave a damn.
Slowly he looked over after Gemma had scoffed at him. He narrowed his eyes a little before letting out a breath âDo you think it matters? If you are dead, does having a birthday even have a point? What about if no one ever cared you were even born in the first placeâŚBirthdayâs were celebrated mostly for marketing purposes. But still, itâs meant to make the person born feel important, special. All Iâve felt on my birthday, for a long timeâŚIs empty.â Much like how he often felt. Nathan looked away then, humming again as he was thinking.
Source: nathan-douglas #Para#GemmaPara#Gemma 12 notes austinxdouglas January 9th 2018, 5:31:30 am ¡ a month ago nathan-douglas austinxdouglas :
Austin saw how Nathanâs attitude changed very quickly, âI meant later,â He added looking at his brother, âLike New Years, we can make it then cause weâre gonna get drunk for sure, and then weâll have fresh pizza for when we get home.â He could feel his mouth water, âRight now, weâll make cookies, what kind of cookie did you want to make? Should we add peppermint in for that festive touch?â He added with an upbeat attitude hoping that would reflect well on Nathan. âOkay, then whatâs your favourite genre out of all of them? Or rate them, top three?â
Nathan could clearly tell the other was lying about that. But he didnât say anything about it, because it really didnât matter âOkay. âŚWe are going to get drunk?â He asked then, a little confused, this was all still very weird. Nathan was wondering why Austin wasnât spending this day with his own family. Exhaling he looked to one side, thinking âWhite cookies, with white chocolate would be good for the peppermint.â Smiling at the other then, faintly, he blinked softly before thinking for a moment âI like treatise, science, and fantasy.â
Source: nathan-douglas #Para#AustinPara#Austin 11 notes emily--wentworth January 5th 2018, 1:33:43 pm ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas emilyâwentworth:
Sometimes it was nice working the day shift. But knowing her, she would probably pick up another shift. Emily needed the distraction that work offered, she missed Elena that pain of losing her would never go away. And she felt bad, because she felt like she was neglecting Miranda. And yes, she did miss Mason. Right now though she didnât want to think about it, instead she turned to the person at the bar. âWhat can I get you?â She asked, a small smile on her face.
âA new life and a new family would be fucking great, if you have that in stock. But I donât imagine you do.â Nathan said, sounding like he was joking as he took a seat and watched her, grinning âNot unless you are a fairy god mother, right?â Shaking his head then he moved to bring his left arm up to rest on the bar before lifting his hand and placing his head in it âSome soda would be good.â
#Para#EmilyPara#Emily 3 notes austinxdouglas January 4th 2018, 10:38:03 pm ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas austinxdouglas:
âNo! Not always, I mean Kristine was going to teach me some things, and I can make a sandwich and cereal!â He argued which didnât help since those were basically mindless. âOh shut up.â He laughed lightly, shaking his head. He raised his eyebrows in shock to hear what his brother could make, âYou can make pizza from scratch?!â He was truly shocked, âDude! Come on, letâs do that! Letâs make that!â He could be super down for a homemade pizza, that would be unreal to him.
âUh, I donât read that many if Iâm honest. I mean, I did a lot in high school when I would commute on the bus, but I donât commute that much anymore. I loved action, or mysterious kinds of books though. What about you?â
Nathan could only look at the other looking disappointed for a brief second, he didnât want to make a pizza from scratch, with Austin. It didnât seem very christmasy to him. He wanted a normal chrismasy thing, cookies. He nodded though âSure, okay, Austin. Weâll make a pizza from scratch.â The smile dropped off his face then and he looked away.
âOh. Huh.â He could honestly tell. Â Nathan pressed at the buttons on the control in his hands and sat silently for a long moment before shrugging haplessly and slowly looking over back toward Austin âI read everything.â
Source: nathan-douglas #Para#AustinPara#Austin 11 notes montana-rodes January 4th 2018, 4:37:31 pm ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas montana-rodes:
Montana became rather irritated as he started talking. She hadnât asked for his life story, nor did she care about his feelings. She concealed her impatience and her frustration as she waited for him to finish talking, the laughter grating on her. âRight.â There was no reason for Montana to hold him any longer and the other guy was long gone. Nothing really happened and she wanted to enjoy her coffee in peace and try to salvage the rest of this day. âWell, stay out of trouble.â Montana said to him as she turned, though making a mental note to keep her eye on that one.
At her slightly dry response to his reply he let out a small breath. Guessing that when officers were basically told âfuck the policeâ, he would get this response. Â Nathan watched her intently as she seemed to be thinking of something, perhaps deciding he could offer her no more on the guy who had walked down the alley, or on himself. Thus just chalking him down as another hoodlum, of which the town was full up on, he supposed this was the best way he could have gone about the interaction. At her last comment he lift his head up slightly, nodding toward her âThanks. You too. Copper.â He gave her a more genuine smile this time before turning and walking opposite from her down the sidewalk.
Source: montana-rodes #Para#MontanaPara#Montana 13 notes montana-rodes January 4th 2018, 4:23:23 pm ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas montana-rodes:
Montanaâs suspicions raised at his response. It was unusual for somebody who wasnât up to anything wrong to not comply with the police. It was painless to give a surname and go back on with your day. It only made her study him a little more. âIf you havenât done anything wrong then whereâs the harm?â What was he and that guy really up to? She was sure it was something now.
As odd as it all would appear to have been on the outside, and indeed it was odd for him not to give a last name to her. But his reasons were that he didnât like authoritative figures, let alone trust them. Â After growing up the way he had, it was least likely any âgrown upâ would make him budge on certain things, if anything. The twenty-three year old squint a bit at her when she spoke, then âWell, thereâs no harm, inherently in your asking for one. But Iâve grown up in a way that has ultimately taught me that Authority is as about as helpful to me as a wet paper bag is in carrying cans, without the arm support on the bottom, get it?â Nathan laughed a little bit, teasing.
Source: montana-rodes #Para#MontanaPara#Montana 13 notes montana-rodes January 4th 2018, 3:07:36 pm ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas montana-rodes:
Montana treated everybody this way. She didnât trust and it kept her safe. This was simply the way she had been made. She would run his name through the database later, when she was back at work, just to make sure he wasnât trying to pull a fast one. The way that other guy had acted and scarpered like that⌠it didnât sit right with Montana. âDo you have a surname, Robert?â Montana asked, folding her arms across her chest. âIâm a police officer.â She added, in case he couldnât figure out why she was asking. Itâs not like she was in uniform. âNot trying to steal your identity or anything.â It was an attempt at a joke but it came out dry, with little humour attached, and no trace of a smile.
âI could?â He said, not at all planning on giving it to her. Because he could guess that if anyone went looking around for a âRobert Douglasâ they would eventually end up on his father, which he didnât mind so much. It was the next thing she had said that had made him decided to never tell her his last name âAh, wellâ As I am not being detained. I donât know why I would need to give it to you. Iâve done nothing wrong. Maybe I have no last name? Like that lady, Cher? â
Source: montana-rodes #Para#MontanaPara#Montana 13 notes montana-rodes January 4th 2018, 1:07:54 pm ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas montana-rodes:
Montana just stared back at him, not cracking a smile in return as she waited for a better explanation. âRight. Okay.â Though to her it had seemed a bit more than that but she could let it slide right now, she supposed. âWhatâs your name?â She asked, deciding to file that away at least.
She didnât believe him, he could tell. But there was really nothing more she was going to get out of him, on the subject. Â When she asked his name he figured, well, he couldnât give her his name. He was dead, and though he had no idea what this woman was like, he couldnât very well go around giving away a dead guys name, his name, to strangers. It would definitely send off major red flags, so he gave off one he thought would be interesting, if not have a funny pay off later âName is Robert.â Now, of course, he could have just used Austinâs name. The fact being, Nathan had figured, that, while they were identical-ish, twins, they had looked strikingly different to anyone paying attention. Nathan was scrawnier than Austin, Nathan had scars all over his body. He was a complete person, outside of having the same face as Austin, even that was an easy tell, their spots were opposite of one another, a mirror image. Ultimately, Austinâs naivety would give it all away in about five seconds after meeting them.
Source: montana-rodes #Para#MontanaPara#Montana 13 notes montana-rodes January 3rd 2018, 7:24:54 pm ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas montana-rodes:
Montana shook her head slightly at the response she got. âRight. Iâm sure he has.â She turned her gaze up the alleyway again, looking the way the other had gone. Sheâd had half a mind to chase after him. âSo, who was that?â She asked, brushing off his apology. She needed to get names and everything straight round here.
âI mean, thatâs a good excuse, right?â He grinned a bit, before unhinging his jaw a little, running his tongue over one of his canines as he thought about what he could have said instead of what he had eventually ended up saying. At her question though he brought his attention back to her âJust aâah.. Guy. Â I have business with.â Â Nathan shrugged a little bit, not really knowing what else to say to that. He had business with that guy, so he didnât feel as though he were lying.
Source: montana-rodes #Para#MontanaPara#Montana 13 notes montana-rodes January 2nd 2018, 2:03:52 pm ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas montana-rodes:
Montana was sipping her coffee when it happened. She felt the body of another collide with her and she almost dropped it completely but managed to keep her fingers clasped around the cup. âHey!â She snapped, immediately turning around to face them but unluckily the culprit was already hauling ass away back up the alley and round out the other side. âAsshole.â She muttered under her breath, a bit unprofessionally but she wasnât technically on the clock, before turning her attention to the guy. âAre you alright? What was that about?â
Looking at the other when she asked if he were alright he turned to face her better. Nodding then he lift up his right hand, rubbing it against his left arm for a moment âYeah. Iâm great.  My uhâ Heâs justâŚGot a lot of emotions, about âŚstuff.â Nathanâs right hand then moved to adjust the glasses better on his face as he let out a huff of a laugh and glanced down the alley, staring for a long moment before shaking his head and looked back toward her âHolidays really seem to be getting to people lately, right⌠Uh.. Sorry, for, um, getting pushed into you?â
Source: montana-rodes #Para#MontanaPara#Montana 13 notes sashaxparker January 1st 2018, 6:27:09 pm ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas sashaxparker:
âYou wonât?â Sasha wondered if you could really just decide a thing like that. She had this idea in her head about the years going by and becoming older and wiser and more boring as they did. Ageing didnât seem appealing. Though some days she did feel older than her years. âOh, cool.â She smiled when they said they were twins. âI always thought that would be fun, to have a twin.â
âNaah. It seems complex, to do that.â Nathan frowned a little, having already come to terms with such a thing years ago. What had been the point? When it got you no where, got you nothing, to grow up seemed stupid to him anyway, without the seventeen years being imprisoned against his will. But because of what he had been through, it hadnât even seemed important to do so. There was no future for him, no one cared what he would have been like. Because everyone had already made their judgments, they had designated him a monster, a killer, without a body count. âI guess.â He muttered to her âcoolâ.  As she said she thought it would be fun he looked at her, grinning a little sadly  âIt âŚcan be. But thereâs the aspect thatâŚthereâs a favorite.â And he was not the favorite, obviously. âI guess thatâs just my jealousy, sorry. Yeah, it was fun, once. Having a twin brother.â  Austin might as well have been the one that died, in his perspective, because it didnât feel the same. He was still an outcast, wasnât he? Rolling another ball of snow up he stared at the balls he had made already then sighed.
Source: nathan-douglas #Para#SashaPara#Sasha 10 notes montana-rodes January 1st 2018, 6:14:32 pm ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas montana-rodes:
Montana wasnât interested in festivities. âNew Yearâ wasnât important. Nothing changed just because the calendar moved on and people were too hung up on this time of year. It was irritating. She had grabbed a coffee before everything closed early and was walking around, sipping her drink and keeping her eyes peeled for any odd behaviour. She needed to be on the alert after all. The dead were on the loose and that was no good for anybody.
âAlright, alright! StopâGet off of me!â He plead as one of the local gang members pulled at his shirt before shoving him into a wall, before pointing a finger at him and threatening him about something gang relate. As Nathan, for several long months now has been being used by them after a very odd run in with one of their members who basically had him kidnapped or something of the sort, indebted to them for the injury he had inflicted on the other gang member, embarrassment played a huge part. With that he was punched in the face before being shoved away from them out of the alley and right into Montana. The gang member had been halfway gone before Nathan could recover enough to assess the damage to his face, let alone acknowledge stumbling into the other âOw owâŚâ Adjusting the sunglasses one his face he frowned then as he pulled his hand away.
#Para#MontanaPara#Montana 13 notes austinxdouglas December 30th 2017, 4:30:28 pm ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas austinxdouglas:
Austin didnât have a reason why he wouldnât believe him, this was a guyâs kind of joke. Austin knew some friends who were too invested in their pranks for their own good, Austin figured Nathan could be that same kind of person. âAlright, maybe I would haveâ He spoke looking at his brother at the mention of the mental hospital. Austin was hoping one day they could talk about it and not have it be an elephant in the room.. He wanted for the ward to be something either he or Nathan could feel comfortable bringing up.
Austin shook his head gently while shrugging his shoulders, âWell, I donât know. I mean, read books, games? I didnât think cooking was going to be an option. So what can you make?â He asked curious about what his brother could possibly make in the kitchen. âWell, I know how to cook pasta?â He added giving himself a little credit, âAnd I can put a pizza in the oven.â he shrugged his shoulders, âI get by.â
Looking down at that, he didnât like it. He didnât like being dead. He didnât feel right about it. He was dead, and he never actually, truly got to be alive. And it was just, really weird. âYeahâŚâ He said then as he stared at the screen of the tv.
âYou didnât? Did you expect to just live on take out and premade pizzaâsâwhatever you could pop in the microwave, your entire life? Kristine must be looking forward to that.â Â He commented dropping his eyes down to the others waistline for a brief moment before smiling up at Austin again âOh, you do? Wow. Thatâs amazing.â He tried to sound excited, but it was pasta, it wasnât exactly a challenge to make such a thing.
âI can make all sorts of things, desserts mostly. But other kinds of food as well. I can make a pizza from scratch.â He mumbled as he turned his attention back to the tv spacing out as he played for a moment before saying âWhat books do you read?â
Source: nathan-douglas #Para#AustinPara#Austin 11 notes peytonsaundersx December 29th 2017, 4:48:12 pm ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas peytonsaundersx:
Peytonâs eyes narrowed, there was no way she was in the mood to deal with anyoneâs shit today. She smirked, stepping to one side âHere you go, the shelf youâve been longing for, for so long.â She really couldnât believe how rude some people could be at times sheâd rather not stoop to their level, but there was something about him that had just instantly grated on her âtake your precious item and then do the world a favour and fuck off back to the pit youâve crawled from.â
With the Peyton picked up the items she wanted from the other self, placed them in her basket and headed to the checkouts.
Nathan narrowed his eyes a bit on her as she narrowed hers on him. As was per the usual for him to do to anyone who glared at him. He had grown up on those looks from the staff and others in the hospital. Why should he have to meet with with any other look.  As she finally moved he went to grab the cooking items, so he could actually make Austin something and the other wouldnât have to buy take out. Placing it in a basket with his other items he continued to listen to the other as she then, for no reason, went on âIâllâŚbe sure to do that.â He looked her over before turning and walking away from her.  A few moments later he moved to a self checkout and was leaving the store.
Source: peytonsaundersx #Para#PeytonPara#Peyton 26 notes peytonsaundersx December 27th 2017, 12:36:08 pm ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas peytonsaundersx:
Now that Christmas is almost over, can we please go back to some normality. Itâd be nice to buy a loaf of bread without having to wait forever in the line. Â
Nathan eyed the woman, suspiciously âGet out of my way.â
#Para#PeytonPara#Peyton 26 notes peytonsaundersx December 28th 2017, 2:00:24 pm ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas peytonsaundersx:
Peyton rolled her eyes, waiting having to wait for a simple purchase was one thing but have to deal with idiotic ass-holes was a whole new level. âIâm pretty sure there was another word you where supposed to add to the end of that sentence,â
Nathan inhaled deeply. Being raised with out parents and in a mental hospital among the most unstable people in town, that had to be locked away and forgotten about, Nathan had been sucked off all his politeness and manners. And so, Nathan grinned âOh, yes. I did forget a word.â He paused, huffing, before rolling his jaw a little, cracking the bone and then speaking once again âGet out of my way, bitch. I need to get to what you are standing in front of, and youâve been standing there for five minutes looking at the other shelf.â He gestured to the other side of the aisle.
Source: peytonsaundersx #Para#PeytonPara#Peyton 26 notes austinxdouglas December 27th 2017, 10:14:32 pm ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas austinxdouglas:
âOh!â He yelled at the news about there being yellow snow, âGross!â He immediately sprung up on his feet spitting at his tongue not even sure if he got any snow in his mouth but spitting it out just in case. Austin ran into the warm and shower and came out with some sweatpants and a t-shirt, similar to what he was wearing to bed. "Yea, and if I hadnât ordered that food both of us would starve so which would you prefer?â he asked rhetorically as his brother stated he knew how to bake it surprised him. âYou do? How?â
Nathan wasnât sure how Austin so easily believed that he had actually put piss snow in that snowball. But if the other were going to just believe him, he wasnât going to tell them otherwise. Maybe that was a lesson for the other. Â Because Nathan had not done that, and had made sure to grab some of the purest snow he could, because he wasnât going to throw piss snow at his brother. When Austin had returned Nathan continued to stare at the tv screen and sit on the floor playing the game âUh-huh, Well you might have.â Â He pointed out before turning his head, looking toward the other when they asked about how he knew how to bake.
He smiled shaking his head âWell, I was in an mental hospital for seventeen years Austin. What do you think goes on there. More importantly, what do you think I did there the whole time?â  Which was probably a good thing for them to talk about⌠âNo, apparently, learning shit helps to keep calm. I was allowed to do all sorts of things, there. Learn a trade, even though I wasnât really ever going to get out⌠They still had me go to a cooking class. Wait, How do you not know how to cook and live by yourself?â
Source: nathan-douglas #Para#AustinPara#Austin 11 notes sashaxparker December 27th 2017, 12:30:05 pm ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas sashaxparker:
Sasha didnât want to think about her brother much right now. Sheâd used to idolise him so much⌠and now things were different. She hadnât heard from him in days.. maybe it was longer. She supposed everything changed as you got older but Sasha found change hard. Especially now. WithâŚ. everything. âMy brotherâs always busy too.â She said when he seemed to get excited about them both having that in common. She giggled. âHe is, yeah.. what about yours?â
âMm, being an actual real life adult sucks. Iâm glad Iâll never officially be one.â He muttered offhandedly before reaching out to grab more snow in his hands. He didnât know if he could handle being ordered around by people who didnât know how to deal with him. The only career he could see himself having was a career criminal, maybe a serial killer. That thought made him stiffen slightly before swallowed pushing it away from his mind when Sasha asked how old his brother was âOh, we are twins. I donât know who is older.â
Source: nathan-douglas #Para#SashaPara#Sasha 10 notes austinxdouglas December 25th 2017, 9:39:40 pm ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas austinxdouglas:
Usually, Austin would spend Christmas with his family, this year everyone was everywhere so he stayed home. As he slept peacefully not caring at all about what time it could be, that was all pushed aside when he suddenly felt something very cold and very strong hit his face. He gasped as he got up in his bed and wiped his face from the wet snow, âWha-wha-â without another thought he was suddenly pushed off the bed. âWhoa!â He exclaimed as he hit the ground. He groaned getting up a bit to look at him, âGive me a minute, I need to shower this prank off.â he chuckled shaking his head. âSure, but Iâm pretty shit at baking⌠and cooking in general.â
âOh, of course. I want to tell you, I made sure to add the yellowest snow I could find to that snowball.â Pulling away then he slid off onto the floor on the opposite side of the bed before standing up and running a hand through his hair, letting out a sigh nods âI kind of assumed that, Austin. Seeing as you order food a lot.â He flicked at his hair before holding his hand out a bit from his face âNot to worry, I guess. I know how to bake. I guess weâll just need the ingredients though.â Turning away he left the room a second later, and a few moments after that noises from the tv began to sound off, as if he were playing a video game. Which he was, as he waited on Austin to do whatever.
Source: nathan-douglas #Para#AustinPara#Austin 11 notes December 25th 2017, 3:12:15 pm ¡ 2 months ago Watching Austin sleep for the last few seconds Nathan smiled a bit as an idea hit him. Pulling away he walked away from the room before leaving the apartment. A few minutes later he was hurriedly walking back through the other males apartment. Moving his left hand he tossed it out, sending a snowball flying right into Austinâs sleeping face âWake up! Itâs Christmas, scrub!â Moving over he dashed toward the bed before jumping into it and shoving the other right off the mattress. Dropping onto his stomach then he smiled âWant to make cookies?â
@austinxdouglas
#Para#AustinPara#Austin#No rush of course#just get to this whenever you are able!~ But still#I couldn't resist#XD 11 notes austinxdouglas December 22nd 2017, 5:01:15 pm ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas austinxdouglas:
Austin sighed as he only got a sarcastic reply, at the mention of wanting to sleep he nodded. âOkay, fine, okay.â He spoke not angry or pissy in any way, just simply stating he understood. âYou can sleep at my place if you want. Iâll order us some food or something when we get there.â
Staring at the other he frowned a little bit. Nathan knew the other would not understand the sort of exhaustion he was feeling. He nodded then and looked away from his brother. Â He guessed that Austin would probably still need to learn how his mind had worked. Dropping his head then he nods, stumbling over his feet then as he almost dosed off while he was walking. Jerking his head back up he blinked batting away the sleepy feeling âSure.â
Source: austinxdouglas #Para#AustinPara#Austin 59 notes austinxdouglas December 22nd 2017, 4:43:18 pm ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas austinxdouglas:
âOh, okay.â He didnât say much about it because he wasnât sure how to bring it up to her, he didnât even think that she may have run into him on her own. He decided to drop the idea of asking him more questions about that topic and moved on. His main focus was to help Nathan get normal again, as he began to talk about how Austin hated him and he was a pain Austin didnât know how to reply. He wanted to help and comfort him in some way though he was at a loss, this was so new to him. A part of him wished Bethany was here, she was good at this, this was what she wanted to do with her life. Who knew if theyâd let her pursue her dream job sheâd actually be a help. That idea clicked in his head and brought a furry in him towards his parents, they were so scared of having Nathan be known amongst their family they didnât think of the fact that if he was more included and Bethany went to psychology she could have helped him. She would have his best interests at heart, having this run through his brain pushed him further at wanting to do what he could to help his brother.
As Nathan put his thumb in his mouth, Austin decided to stay present but silent, he didnât want to interrupt whichever method was going to help him calm down, though heâd made a mental note to try to talk to Nathan later in a calm manner about what and who he sees. Austin watched as Nathan began to calm his breathing and his entire aura became more calm and relaxed. âHey, you okay?â Austin asked hoping for a solid answer and not a sarcastic one. Austin stood with Nathan, he looked back at the grave and although he should be relieved he was confused. âO-okay.â He spoke and followed his brother towards the exit and towards his car. âWe can come back after dark.â He stated again.
Nathan gave Austin an exhausted look as they asked if he were okay. Of course he wasnât, and he didnât know how to not answer sarcastically, letting out an exhausted sigh, his shoulders slouched âIâm sorry, were you here, or somewhere else just a few seconds ago?â He mumbled, sounding absolutely drained. A moment later when the other repeated what they said he let out another breath âI just want to sleep, Austin. OkayâŚI donât fucking care right nowâŚâ
Source: austinxdouglas #Para#AustinPara#Austin 59 notes austinxdouglas December 18th 2017, 4:31:52 am ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas austinxdouglas:
As Nathan explained to him it was his fault, he truly felt more and more guilty because everything he was saying was true. Although Austin believed he was in a weird and odd situation it still didnât mean everything Nathan was saying was a lie. Austin wasnât sure how to reply, he looked down in shame and stuck the end of the shovel into the ground. He wanted to apologize though he wasnât sure how a simple âiâm sorryâ wouldnât fix anything. When Nathan had mentioned Kristine he furrowed his eyebrows, âShe⌠what? When did you two meet? How did you two meet?â He tried not to ask it in such an accusing tone though he remembers the early days when Nathan would pretend to be him. It made his blood boil to think Nathan would have played a trick like that on his own girlfriend.
As Nathan began to hyperventilate he made sure to stay at eye level with his brother. It was time someone trusted him, someone believed his side of the story. Austin decided that would be him. Why was he treating him like a homeless stranger off the streets? This was his brother, no matter that he didnât know him, this wasnât how he would treat Bethany or Grace, why should he treat Nathan any different? As his words didnât seem to help Nathan at all, he began to worry a bit. Austin immediately dropped his shove when he fell to the ground, âNate, listen to me okay? Letâs go home, we can come back later. Sometime when itâs not as noticeable.â He offered, âOkay? Just calm down, focus on your breathing, or something. Close your eyes and focus.â
âSh-she ran in-into one of those task force guys, who knocked her books on the ground.â Of course Kristine didnât say anymore to him about the picture, as he was having another fit at the time and was all over the place then. He probably had been told more and just couldnât remember it at the moment. Blinking he let out a few struggled gasps âI wasnât doing anything.â He then said, as if he were doing something, not to Kristine of course. But there had been a reason behind why he was there, at that moment. When the task force officer had run into her.
Looking around he swallowed hard, trying to focus on Austin as the other spoke, but it was of course very difficult when he didnât have anything that normally would have helped in situations like these. And even if he did have something, those somethings wouldnât work. He was on his own with this, a fish out of water, gasping as it slowly died in the foreign world it had been yanked into. Bringing his eyes back to the other he continued to tear up, panic taking over as shadows from the corners of his eyes crept around them, even though it was in the middle of the day âI-I canâtâŚI canât ca-calm downâŚI-itâs tooâŚt-to-too hard.â He paused, his breath catching in his throat as his eyes started to drift again toward a creeping shadow before they jerked back to Austin. Closing his eyes tightly he whispered about something not being there, not being real.
Bringing his hands up to his eyes then he let out a little sob apologizing to Austin âIâm sorryâIâm tryingâŚIâm trying toâBut Iâmâ âŚI donât mean to be-be ah- heh âI know you hate me. I kno-Know I am not making-M aking th-thi-iss e-eeasyâŚIâm a-ah burdenâIâm sorry. Iâm so sorry. Iâm not what any of you w-wanted.That I am hard to-to lllike. I canât contr-trol this on my my ownâplease pleaseâŚTheyâre everywhere, whispering, I see them-Shadows. I sâI didnât ask for this. I didnât want thisâ I just want it to stop! Please.â Taking in a deep breath he held it pressing his face into his hands before unconsciously his left hand moved down, his thumb absently sliding into his mouth.
A moment later the tears and terrified look on his face faded almost completely as a dulled subdued look came over him. Almost completely calmed, his right hand pet along the hair on the right side of his face. His breathing tapered off into something more manageable then. A few moments after eerie silence and immaturely sucking on his thumb he finally pulled it out and shakily began to move, pushing himself up from the ground looking absolutely more exhausted than he did normally. These sort of things took a lot of out him whenever they happened, and they had been happening frequently since he woke up in the woods. Staring at Austin then he let out another breath before closing his eyes and dropping his head down, almost embarrassed as he wiping his thumb off on his pants and began to walk away from the grave, toward the exit âCome on. Letâs go. Thereâs no point in digging it up, or in coming back.â
Source: austinxdouglas #Para#AustinPara#Austin 59 notes sashaxparker December 15th 2017, 8:13:11 am ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas sashaxparker:
Sasha gave a little nod when he said sheâd outgrown it. âYeah. Maybe.â She felt older somehow lately, despite her sixteen years. Things just felt heavy, like she was suffocating, and she didnât have it in her for much cheer or Christmas spirit. She used to love winter, too. Sasha moved to sit down on a bench nearby, wiping off some of the snow, and folded her arms as she listened to him. He seemed content enough with her not saying a whole lot, which was nice enough. âYeah?â She remembered when her own brother had been around enough to do all that stuff with, when sheâd been nothing but an innocent kid. âIâm sure he will when heâs less busy?â She tried to be positive but she shrugged a little. âIâd offer to help but I left my gloves at home.â Sasha scrunched her nose a little bit, before glancing down at his question. âUh, yeah. I have a brother.â
He shook his head, feeling a bit bad for her. Or maybe just everyone in general, who got older. Most people let themselves be fooled by the illusion of adulthood. That they had to be mature. Nathan had never had that burden. He had never had to deal with anyone killing his inner child. Though at the same time he had to grow up far quicker than most that were his age. Contently he continued what he had been doing. He loved this time of year. He had always loved Christmas, though of course in the last seventeen years his Christmasâ had not been anything worth enjoying. But still, his love for this time of year had always remained. âHeâs always busy.â Nathan said. Thinking about how Austin treated him, or just how Austin was always working.
He realized in all these months Austin spent more time thinking about how to deal with him, and not really getting to know him âHopefully he stops being busy soon, so we can enjoy our time together.â He wondered how much time this all would last, where he could spend time with his siblings. Nathan had to guess that it would probably not last as long he would like. He was dead. And he had no idea what that really meant. As Sasha spoke again he glanced toward her and put on another smile âYeah.â He answered, not wearing much winter clothing himself, just a few layers of shirts with a hoodie on top and a pair of skinny jeans he had found during the summer. âA brother!? Â We both have brothers. Thatâs cool. Is he your older brother?â
Source: nathan-douglas #Para#SashaPara#Sasha 10 notes sashaxparker December 14th 2017, 5:41:05 pm ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas sashaxparker:
âReally?â Sasha smiled, somehow brightened up a little bit just by the sight of him seemingly having so much fun - and not seeming embarrassed or held back about it. âThatâs cool then.â Lucky for him it had snowed then. âOh.â Sasha gave a little shrug at his question, glancing around the park briefly. Maybe looking for an escape route in case she needed one. âI guess Iâm not really in the mood to be honest. Why donât you make a snowman?â
Nathan gave a small nod patting his hands gently over the ball of snow in his hand âReally.â Â Looking at her he blinked, a little confused fr a moment before giving a smile âIt is, really cool.â Going back to playing with the snow Nathan didnât notice her looking around. When she spoke he looked toward her once again âNo? Oh. Guess you have outgrown it. You were able to enjoy it as a kid.â Nathan scooped up some more snow, grinning sweetly, softly as he made another ball from it â A Snowman wouldnât be bad! I really should! I- I-â He laughed a bit âMy brother and I used to make snowmen all the time. A snowman army.â Lifting up another handful of snow he started to make another ball âHeâs too busy to do stuff like this. Iâll just have to build one by myself. Maybe one day heâll join me. I hope.â Placing the ball next to the others he looked at Sasha âDo you have any siblings?â
Source: nathan-douglas #Para#SashaPara#Sasha 10 notes austinxdouglas December 14th 2017, 3:51:35 pm ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas austinxdouglas:
âNate I was just a kid! What do you expect from me? Do you think the second you left things were easy? I bet you they werenât, you were my brother, at the time I probably asked for you all the time.â He argued, though that was the only thing he said. Because listening to Nathan as he vented while hitting his gravestone, everything he was saying was true in some way. Nathan couldnât understand the dynamic of his family, their dad was tried his best, they both tried their best.
When Nathan threw his shovel Austin stood there not sure what to do, he just watched his brotherâs headstone get completely broken in two. Watching Nathan get so heated and angered by their conversation he noticed this face again. He noticed this reaction, he noticed this pronunciation of his name. âNate?â He spoke before standing in front of him, wanting to find a way to calm him down. âNate relax, relax. You know what youâre right. Youâre right about everything. What dad did was wrong, what mom didnât do was wrong. She should have stuck up for you. I believe you, okay? I believe you not them.â
âI know you were a kid, Austin! Â But you still forgot about me. Let that fucking bastard tell you lies about me! And you still believed them even until earlier this year! That I was made up! That I didnât exist! And when you knew that I did! You still believed him! That makes you accountable. NOT for what you couldnât do Then. But for what you helped do after, before this!â He pointed toward the gravestone. âDo you understand! I am dead! And that is all of your FAULT! No matter how little or big a part you played! You all helped each other play it! And I was murdered for it!âYour girlfriend told me all about that picture you two found!â
Gripping at his head, he gasped for air, trying to not choke on the thickness building in his throat. Swallowing he shakes his head as he hears Austin âI canât, thereâs too much going on. My head.â Â Wincing he dropped a bit, closing his eyes tightly as he tried to shake away the feeling in his head, the thoughts that were cramming into it, he felt like his head would explode. He could hear what Austin was saying, but it had just filled in with the rest of his thoughts. Looking up at the other, he pant, sweat building on his face. He continued to stare at Austin. Not knowing what to think of what the other had just said to him.
With a choppy breath, he inhaled, dropping a hand to his chest as his breaths clung in his throat. Feeling dizzy he dropped to the ground, sitting down. The panic taking over his entire body. His face turned red, tears welling in his eyes as he continued to struggle for air âT-tin-Tin-tinâŚI canât-canâtâŚheh, heh.â Nathan coughed, trying to jog something from his swelling throat.
Source: austinxdouglas #Para#AustinPara#Austin 59 notes austinxdouglas December 14th 2017, 2:55:28 pm ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas austinxdouglas:
Austin listened to his brother contently, he hated hearing what heâd gone through. The more he was hearing it the more he was getting angry at his seven-year-old self, and his family. Â âHey!â He spoke looking at Nathanâs gravestone and noticed the month and year he died. âThis is when you died?â He asked it as a rhetorical question before she was thinking back to when his mom began her depression. As he was going to on with his point his thoughts were interrupted. âFirst off, We donât know each other well enough to be throwing judgements at each other. Second I am supportive, but this isnât smart. Third, don't say no one gave a fuck about you because I know itâs not true.â He spoke before pointing at the stone, âThe month you died was the same month Mom went into depression. So donât think that you werenât cared about.â He spoke before he shoved his shovel into the ground and began to dig.
Stopping as the other spoke he made a face as they asked about when he died. Looking to the gravestone then he sighed, sarcastically. Then as the other started listing things off to him he stuck the shovel into the dirt and nodded his head. When Austin had finally shut up, Nathan had to suck in a breath to think about what was just unloaded onto him âAustin. Â I can judge you. You forgot about me, and believed me to be a monster. Â You are not supportive to me. This entire time you doubt me, you never listen to anything I say. Itâs always Denial first.â Â Nathan paused then and leaned onto his shovel, grinning a little more âI know this isnât smart, Austin. But itâs what I want to do. Because you wonât listen to me. Blame yourself.â
Gesturing back to the gravestone carelessly then he grinned a little wider âBecause she knew this entire time and she let them murder me!â Angry suddenly he picked up the shovel and started smacking the gravestone with it âShe let that fucking bastard murder me and What!!??! Am I supposed to feel bad she feelâs depressed?! FUCK HER! I am the one who died! For a murder that never happened! I am the one who suffered all these years, for a crime that I never committed! And all I fucking wanted was my family to listen to me! TO be with them! And you want to say they CARE?!!?!â Â
Smacking the stone hard enough at the end it finally cracked and broke in half.  Throwing the shovel away from him then he started to walk away, stomping âI never hurt her! I never fucking meant to hurt her! I am the one that spent seventeen years locked up in a fucking mental hospital being abused, because I didnât hurt her! And your momâs depressed?! BOO FUCKING WHOO! Bitch deserves to be! After what they did to me!!â Hyperventilating his hands move to grip onto the sides of his head, blood began to spill from his nose â Iâ Itâs too muchâ I feel too muchâ I-i-Tin-TinâToo much-It hurtsâŚ.it hurtsâŚâ
Source: austinxdouglas #Para#AustinPara#Austin 59 notes sashaxparker December 14th 2017, 11:34:45 am ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas sashaxparker:
Sasha was feeling quite out of it. Her mind was disconnected and she was feeling sort of like she wasnât all here. Sheâd gone out for a walk to clear her mind but it wasnât truly helping, though the clear sky was pretty to look up at as she went. She just wished she could feel like herself again⌠what if she never did? It was snowing now and she pulled her scarf up over her head to protect her hair. It looked pretty and it did strangely make her feel a little better. She came to the park and noticed she wasnât alone suddenly. It set her on edge at first but she couldnât help but chuckle as she watched the other having a good time with the snow. He looked carefree. âHaving fun?â She asked, though not really sure why she struck up a conversation.
Packing some snow into a ball when he heard Sasha he glanced over and grinned a bit. He then looked back to the snowball and packed more snow onto it âSooo much fun.â He says, a little excitedly. âItâs the first time iâve gotten to be around snow since I was seven years old.â He wasnât even bothered by the cold. He just wanted to enjoy this before it was ripped away from him, like everything else was. And had always been. He had learned to enjoy things while he had the chance, for as long as he could because it could be gone in a moment. Even if sometimes it might make him seem like a child, or even stupid. Nathan knew he was neither of these things âWhy arenât you having fun, too?â
Source: nathan-douglas #Para#SashaPara#Sasha 10 notes austinxdouglas December 8th 2017, 1:56:05 pm ¡ 2 months ago nathan-douglas austinxdouglas:
Austin looked stared at the grave still in a little shock about all of this. When Nathan started to yell at him, he raised his eyebrows âHey!â He yelled as he raised his arms to block the dirt that was thrown at his face. âI mean how did you die! I know mom and dad fucked you over! I know that, but you were alive when they sent you there!â He noticed as Nathan started to dig, âNate come on, this isnât a good idea.â
âI-â He cut himself off, trying to think. He didnât actually remember dying. He just remembered leaving solitary âI was in trouble. They put me in solitary for days. I-i.. When they let me out- thatâs it. Thatâs all I remember. I went to bed. Okay. And then I was in the fucking woods.â He glared at Austin âThey might as well have sentenced me to death, Austin! Your Parents, they had to have known! I told her! Constantly. But she wouldnât fucking listen! Just like you arenât listening to me! And now I am dead. SoâŚâ He stabbed at the ground again âEh! Good idea, bad Idea. Iâm the one who is buried here, and no one gives a fuck about me. So help me or donât. If you donât, thatâs fine. Iâve always done everything without you anyway.  You were always the one that was needy. So fuck off! If you donât want to help me. âI donât know why I expected any support from you, you were never the supportive type.â
Source: austinxdouglas #Para#AustinPara#Austin 59 notes kerrieridgeway December 5th 2017, 3:55:31 pm ¡ 3 months ago nathan-douglas kerrieridgeway:
She sighed as he pointed out their last interaction, of course he didnât put his actions into account. Only blamed her. âI promise to give you hot coffee if thatâs what you want.â She spoke looking at him, before staring down either side of the street making sure that no one obvious was watching. âIf theyâre watching you, being outside isnât a good idea.â
Nathan could be immature and yes, often blamed others before he would ever blame himself. There was no question about that. However, he had not done anything to Kerrie before she dumped coffee on him, accidentally, to him it  still stung, and everything that followed was because of the coffee incident. As she said she would give him more he paused and looked at her worried and shook his head âI donât like coffee⌠Donât throw any coffee on me anymore. Too hot. Itâs too hot.â At the last thing she said he shook his head âIt wonât help. Heâll come and get me, heâs not scared.â
Source: kerrieridgeway #Para#KerriePara#Kerrie 5 notes kerrieridgeway December 5th 2017, 2:58:48 pm ¡ 3 months ago nathan-douglas kerrieridgeway:
Kerrie was cleaning a table in her diner when she noticed the young adult who she really disliked. Though as she saw him so distraught she felt something for him, she watched for a minute before sighing and deciding to do something. She put her rag down and opened the front door, âHey,â she spoke looking at him waiting to get his attention. âAre you okay?â She spoke as she felt the colder December winds hit her. âCome inside,â she spoke wondering if he was distraught over anything task force related. She wasnât sure, but seeing him so upset hit a chord with her.
Self âFound you, you bastard.â Nathan muttered, giving a slight smirk as he looked at the photo of the man he had searched for in the search engine on the computer he was on. Â Moving he pulled out a journal from his backpack and then a pen, writing down several names. The current name he was on, the first of a long line, he began to write down several facts that were written about the guy on the computer âA gay son who works at the local gay stripe club. Interesting.â Â Nathan mused for a moment as he wrote âPhysical abuse accusations over a period of years, a little as a year ago, no surprise there. No wonder he was this easy to find.â
Nathan had spent the next few hours or so doing research, looking up several other peoples names on his list. He then left the library and made his way down toward a sidewalk that eventually lead him to a somewhat decent neighborhood. Nathan hide out near by a house, watching it, waiting for a cue. Once that cue had arrived home, some hours later, from work. Nathan smirked, confirming that his target had indeed been the right one he spent the next few weeks watching the guyâs activities, learning about where they would be, when he needed them to be somewhere.
After his observations had been made extensively, Nathan then began to make daily visits to the gay stripe club, at first observing goings on. Never calling the attentions of the son he had learned about just weeks earlier. After a few days he then made the move to lure the young male over to him, getting their attention by acting more on his personality with out the filter of âabuseâ that had often blocked his true personality, or emotions, from showing clearly. Once he had gotten the male in his snares Nathan spent the next few days getting to know the other, and them thinking the were getting to know him as well. To the point that had actually begun to treat Nathan like a friend. Even at times jokingly calling Nathan his future boyfriend.
Once reaching that point with the male, which was surprisingly easy, Nathan had thought. But still, he supposed for him an apparent sociopath, it wasnât so hard to lure the weak minded into his fake personalities. It more so depended on what Nathan wanted. As time went on Nathan began to pay for a private room for him and the son of the guy he had been targeting.
They were grinding up against him then, pressing their lips against his, making out with him and rubbing a hand against his junk. Nathan played along, pretending he had been into the mood of the current situation. Once it was over though he frowned in mock sadness âIâll be back tomorrow. Iâll even, probably, bring you a surprise.â Nathan pulled away then, button his jeans back up as they stood and toyed with his hair, telling him how much they wanted to have sex with him, before asking why Nathan had never asked them to meet him outside of the club âI willâŚone day. I just, have a lot of shit going on in my life.â Nathan forced a smile then âI still feel like we donât know each other enough to show you that part of my life.â Cold dark eyes locked onto theirs âIn time.â
He watched the male leave the room the before rolling his eyes and moving to exit as well. Minutes later he was walking toward his brothers apartment. Nathan had definitely noticed the other had been distant, which wasnât anything entirely knew. Austin was hopelessly useless to him, in many ways. And if the other would rather talk to their girlfriend than help him, he supposed he would just have to get revenge, all by himself. On everyone who had ever fucked him over. Starting from the bottom.
#Self December 17th 2017, 2:26:48 pm ¡ 2 months ago âHave you thought of any names for them?â A nurse asked the woman laying beside her, several months pregnant it seemed. She then glanced over to the womanâs husband as the woman had also, a grin on her face as is she were thinking.
âWellâŚâ She started pointing at the monitor âI think this one should be Austin.â She said as she point toward one baby, that appeared to be sucking on itâs thumb âIt fits, right Robert? Austin. And this one.â She paused for a moment to think, seeing the other baby was a bit more feisty âI think Ad-â
âLetâs name him Nathanael.â Â Robert finally spoke up looking at the monitor and nodding âYeah, I like that one.â Staring at his wife she gave him a concerned look before nodding. Â She obviously had been thinking of a completely different name for the other twin, but she supposed she would let Robert have this one, it wasnât that big of a deal to her, of course. Originally, when they thought one of them would be a girl one of the twins was going to be named something that fit a lot better with Austin.
A Little While Later
Getting in from the hospital Karina walked inside carrying one baby carrier âAlright Aussie, stop fussing.â She cooed placing the carrier down finally as the infant inside it whimpered before having a complete meltdown just as they were brought inside. Karina sighed, obviously extremely exhausted after having just had two babies only a couple days earlier. Both of which seemed a little fussy the entire drive home. Â She watched as Robert finally came inside with the other baby carrier in hand and the baby bag. It was around this time that the other baby also began to fuss because of Austinâs crying âHere we go, again.â Karina laughed before giving a kiss Robert and taking the baby carrier out of his hands âCan you make up their bottles, maybe thatâll settle them down.â She turned to Austinâs carrier and gave a exhausted smile âRight? Howâs that sound?â She cooed again gently reaching over to tickle lightly at his stomach âGood thing Grace is with Grandma.â
Placing Nathanâs carrier beside Austinâs he started to bring his arms and legs in closer to his body, his face scrunching and turning red before he let out a few whimpers of his own. Obviously he was attempting to cover his ears. Â Karina noticed this and frowned âHey, hey, do-â She looked toward Austin, thinking that if he could get him calm he could prevent what was about to go down. Searching for a pacifier then she found the one she had given Austin earlier in the carrier beside him âHere.â She offered watching the other take it, but a moment later she watched him refuse to take it. Looking at Nathan then she blinked, before her eyes widened seeing he was sucking on his thumb âOh. Ooh.â She glanced toward the kitchen where she could here Robert and then back to the twins âWell, thatâs surprising.â With a shrug then she continued to try and get Austinâs to stop crying. It wasnât until Robert returned with a bottle and she handed it over to him, holding it for him that Austin had finally calmed down.
A Few Weeks Later
Austin was crying over something, perhaps it was the dark that had been keeping him up at night, crying. The crying had happened so often that Grace and Robert had both asked to sell him for a new brother.  One of them was joking, at least. The other was a little bit more serious. Nathan on the other had, had hardly ever cried. It seemed the moment that Austin started he would stick his thumb in his mouth and this had managed to make him feel extremely calm during Austinâs moments of  crying. Austin was a baby, of course, both literally and emotionally.  He would often cry over little things. Grace often didnât appear to enjoy playing with him, because he always seemed like he was going to break.  One little wrong move and Austin would start to fuss. Nathanâs thumb would find itself in his mouth and stay their for the rest of the day, furiously being sucked at.
One Year Later
Nathan was sat up, sucking on his left thumb, his right hand lifting up a block onto another next to Austin who was chewing on a megaman toy contently. Â It seemed that over the last year or so he had calmed down significantly enough to actually develop a personality trait that had not been âbig cry babyâ. Â Nathan and he garbled something back and forth in some babyish talk. Austin giggled gently at Nathan after he garbled something. Nathan continued to loosely suck at his thumb, still somewhat locked into his mouth as he eyed the toys in front of him. The two only looked up as Grace had come running across the living room followed by Robert. She started shouting for their mother, obviously wanting to show her something that she had been working on in school.
Robert looked over toward the twins then âHey, boys. Nathan, take that out of your mouth.â The older male ordered before walking over to Nathan and picking him up, and pulling it out forcibly before placing Nathan down again âThatâs so disgusting.â Â Robert mumbled, not realizing that Nathan could understand what the other was saying, and would remember these moments.
It went on like this on and off, every day, Robert would make Nathan stop sucking on his thumb then complain to Karina about encouraging such a disgusting habit. To Robert the habit had outgrown itâs cuteness and he was too old to be doing something like that.
Three Years Later
While taking a nap Nathan was sucking on the tip of his thumb absently, earlier that day he had an argument with Austin over a toy and was placed in time out by Robert who told him the next time he through a toy at Austin, that he would throw a toy at Nathan. Robert then left Nathan locked in their bedroom where he was told to stay on his bed and not move. Nathan eventually fell asleep as two hours passed and had been sleeping there for the last three hours.
The door finally opened and Karina walked in âNo. Robert, Austin said it was an accident. He was waiting by the damn door when I walked into the house!â She shouted at Robert as she walked into the room toward Nathanâs bed. Crouching down beside it she reached over and ran a hand over the top of his head. Blinking Nathan looked at her and frowned. Karina smiled âCome on, Nanny.â Leaning in she gave him a kiss to the forehead before pulling down the blankets and picking him up. Robert glared for a moment before sighing and walking away saying that he might have gone a little too far, and that maybe Nathan would learn a lesson about throwing toys.
Some Odd Years Later
Sitting in front of the therapist Nathan sucked nervously on his thumb, staring at the guy sitting in front of him. They tapped their pen on the paper before looking at Robert âSo youâve always felt him to be unnerving and strange, compared to your other children? Heâs hurt them, and been extremely aggressive since the day you brought him home.â They gave Robert a look before nodding âAnd how long has he been sucking on his thumb?â
âHeâs always sucked on his thumb. Weâve tried all kinds of things to get him to stop. Put hot sauce on it, he likes hot sauce now.â Â Karina answered looking at Robert, not wanting to say that her husband had gone so far as to threaten to put Nathanâs thumbs in a blender. She looked at Nathan then only to watch Robert reach over and yank the thumb from Nathanâs mouth and tell him to stop it.
âOh. Well, some children usually will stop sucking their thumbs early on. Unless theirâs something going on. Â Usually itâs fixation. But there are also cases that abuse makes some children continue to suck their thumb.â Making a few marks on the paper in his lap the therapist nodded â If heâs been doing this since before he was born, itâs probably an oral fixation.â What the therapist didnât know was that Nathanâs thumb sucking was because of Austin, making him extremely nervous or anxious. Which as Austin got older it began to come Robert who was making him anxious all the time and use his thumb to de-stress after every encounter they had.
The therapist smiled then and looked at the pair before looking at Nathan âDonât worry, weâll see what we can do.â Ripping the paper from their clipboard they handed it over to Robert âGive him this every day and youâll start to see significant changes, heâll be less aggressive.â Watching this go down Nathan started to suck on his thumb again, anxiously, he inhaled sharply. Not protesting, because he mostly didnât understand what was going on and he believed he was bad, and needed to do whatever to be good.
Age Eight
Yanking at his arms Nathan stared up at Breccan as the other talks âThis will make you stop. Iâm sure of it.â He gave a nod to one of the orderlies then and the brought Nathan closer to a bowl of liquid, dunking Nathanâs thumb inside it, coating his thumb. Then doing the same to the other thumb. The orderly continued to hold Nathanâs arms in a way that kept his thumbs from getting smeared as the liquid dried. Then they dunked it again, and proceeded to do this for a while.
Finally he was released with the other children in the hospital. Standing for a moment he walked over toward some toys that no one else was messing with. He could hear one kid freaking out over something and staff trying to deal with that. Sniffling as he picked up one toy he wished he were home. Feeling stressed out then as the shouting and struggling continued from behind him he moved his left hand up to suck on his thumb. Only to be hit with a bitter taste a moment later. Â Gagging he yanked his thumb out of his mouth and shook his hand. Blinking, he stared at his thumb before looking over. Letting out a breath he glared before slamming his hand on the floor and groaning under his breath, his anger become a little hard to control.
December 18, 2017
Nathan had been sleeping, or more, resting, for the last day. He didnât feel like moving, or doing anything at all. He just wanted to lay in the small closet in Austinâs apartment, feeling safe and comfortable there, more than he had been sleeping in a big open space. Â The last few months of stress, being angry, and being hurt had began to manage itself. Pulling back into the recesses of his mind. Just being able to sit down and have a day where he wasnât dealing with all the shit in his world was usually something he had needed, but rarely ever got. Since he woke up in the woods. Letting out a calming sigh he continued resting. Â The thumb on his left hand being sucked on furiously as it helped him de-stress from everything.
Finally leaving the closet about two days after that Nathan opened the door and inhaled deeply before stretching out. Walking into the living room he noticed it was pretty earlier in the morning. He didnât feel like leaving yet, feeling that if he did leave things would just become more stressful. He was feeling that for the moment he would hold off on the stress for the moment and make something to eat, because he was starving. Â Hearing some snoring he looked down the hall toward Austinâs room and frowned a little âWell at least he is sleeping.â With a serious look he started toward the kitchen, which wasnât very far away.
About an hour or so later Nathan was sat on the floor in the Livingston with a pile of breakfast food he made, by himself, from whatever was in the kitchen. Stabbing a fork full of pancakes, that he made, slathered in blueberry syrup on one side and strawberry on the other he shoved the bite in his mouth and chewed as he moved to grab up some sausage, ham and bacon and started to shovel it all into his mouth. Wiping his hand off then he moved it back over to the game controller in his hand and continued to play whatever game he was playing, loudly on the tv.
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