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someone-stole-all-my-fruit · 3 days ago

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It was Always Him

Hello! This is my gift for @doomedhowell for the @phandomgiftexchange!

I really hope you like it <3 ! I haven't written fic in a long time, but I thought this was the perfect opportunity to get back into it, and after this I definitely plan on writing more. Probably longer-form stuff. I'm going to be honest posting this makes me so nervous, but I really did have so much fun participating in this!

Dan and Phil had just moved into their forever home. Their dream home. Everything was different now, but really, it was all the same. As they attended a neighborhood party and snuck away, they reminisced about their lives together, and if there was one thing Phil knew: It was always Dan.

Fluff with a bit of comedy. Just meant to be cute :)

Word Count: 2,406

As Phil grabbed the hamper and began preparing the laundry, a tiny smile crept onto his face. His eyes, less youthful than they had once been, crinkled as he grinned, a faint sigh leaving his lips. Suddenly, everything was different. Everything was different and yet everything was the same as it always was. To many, the word “always” would be an exaggeration, but not to Phil. Always began 12 years ago. Their always. Dan and Phil have lived together for pretty much the entire time they had known one another. There was a short period of time between when they met and when they got their first apartment that they lived apart, but in the grand scheme of things, what is a year and a half compared to a lifetime? Thank God for laundry, Phil thought. If Dan hadn’t come over nearly every day to do laundry when he was in Uni they may never have decided it would be easiest to move in together. To this day doing laundry makes Phil happy. That damn laundry.

Everything was different now. This wasn’t an apartment anymore, this was their house, their “phouse”, as the internet called it. The fact that the internet created a special name for their home blew Phil’s mind. Despite how strange and chaotic the internet can be, Phil owed so much to it. After all, without the internet, they never would have met. Phil whistled the tune under his breath. That damn song would be the death of him. Why do so many people care about what Dan and I do, anyway? Phil though. He isn’t famous; he isn’t an actor or a pop star. Neither is Dan, but at least Dan has talent.

Like a river on a stormy day, as it often happened, memories of Dan and Phil’s early years flooded Phil’s mind. Their first conversation over text all those years ago and how Dan tried to play it cool even though Phil knew all along Dan was a huge fan of his. The first time they met in person and how posh and confident Dan seemed. It intimidated Phil, even though he was older. Their first kiss and what it meant to Phil knowing Dan was not yet fully comfortable with his sexuality but still trusted Phil enough to be vulnerable with him. The first time they told each other they loved one another; something they have said thousands of times since the first. Things are different now.

Better.

“Phil, we’re going to be late,” a voice shouted from the next room over. His voice. “Can’t you start the wash later?”

“I know, I know,” Phil said. “I just wanted to start it so when we got back it would be ready to dry. Plus, I like doing the laundry. It makes me happy.”

“Laundry makes you happy?” Dan stepped through the door and shot Phil one of his signature sarcastic looks. “Look, Phil, that’s a little strange even for you.”

“Strange as it may be, it makes me think of you. Of us. Of our youth,” Phil got out his puppy dog eyes that seemed to make Dan melt every time. It worked.

“God, I know we’re old but saying “our youth” makes it sound like we’re ancient,” said Dan, cringing at the thought. “You, however, as old as we may be, are still just as adorable as you were the day that I met you. And you’ll continue to be adorable until the day you inevitably die. Which better be after me by the way,” Dan winked, chucking slightly. “Now, slow poke, finish up with the wash so we can get going. We better not be late. Otherwise they might not invite us back.”

Dan was right of course. Phil quickly threw the was in and scurried to the door. He grabbed Dan’s hand and held it tightly as they began to make their way over to the neighbors.

“Shit, the desert!” Shouted Dan. He let go of Phil’s hand and ran back inside. In a moment he was back at Phil’s side, cookie tray in hand. “Got them!”

Phil grabbed Dan’s hand once more and planted a cheeky kiss on his lips. “You are adorable.”

Failing at holding back a smile, Dan stuck his tongue out at Phil and said “I don’t want to be adorable. I want to be dark and mysterious.”

“You’re mysteriously adorable?” Phil raised an eyebrow as he said this.

Dan cackled. “You, Philip Michael Lester, are just a mystery.”

Mansion wasn’t a big enough word for the type of house they were standing in. Phil thought that he and Dan were proud of their new home but it was nothing in comparison to this absolute art piece of a house. It had pillars for God’s sake. Pillars! Vibrant green foliage decorated the foyer. The main party was in the living room, which had couches that looked like they belonged in a house from the regency era adorned with tasteful pillows that looked expensive and impossible to wash. A fireplace was lit; the true centerpiece of the room. A small table with snacks and drinks was set up next to the bar, which, by the way, was fully staffed. Phil felt out of place and wondered if Dan felt the same. Nevertheless, he took their cookies and set them on the table with the rest of the finger foods.

“What the fuck?” Dan had a horrified look on his face. “Phil what the fuck kind of neighbors do we have? We don’t belong in a place like this! For fucks sake I’m wearing a t-shirt!”

Luckily for Dan, most of the other guests were wearing T-shirts as well. Despite the fancy home, their neighbors were nice. Just nice. Exactly the type of people you would expect to live in a house with pillars. Phil could tell they had grown up rich. They weren’t like Dan and Phil who made their money themselves. It didn’t make much of a difference in Phil’s mind, it was just obvious to him. The whole neighborhood was invited to this party, so at least Dan and Phil were able to fade into the background and keep mostly to themselves. Making pleasantries was one thing, but making friends was another, harder thing. Real friends, that is.

At first, he and Dan were worried about what their neighbors would think about the two of them. Should they be truthful? Should they tell them they are a couple? Or should they not say anything at all? In the end, they decided to keep things hush-hush, at least for now. The truth would obviously come out eventually, but Phil valued his privacy and he knew Dan did as well.

One of their neighbors seemed alright. Dan, Phil, and the neighbor stood by the snack table and chatted for a while. He was a big drinker and insisted that they try his specialty cocktail. Dan and Phil obliged, interested in the concoction and glad to have connected with somebody. The cocktail was strong. Phil couldn’t tell you what was in it for the life of him. It tasted decent enough. After chatting with him for a few minutes, the neighbor disappeared. Phil couldn’t tell you his name if he tried. Was it Gary? Terry? Something along those lines. Hopefully Dan remembered.

After 3 hours of small talk and chatting with Gerald, social battery drainage did not even begin to cover what Phil was experiencing. It was late. He had had a couple more drinks after the ones Toby had already given him and he was starting to feel them. Drinking wasn’t something Phil did often, so whenever he did they hit him hard and fast. It wasn’t a feelling he minded, but he needed a bit of air. He walked out of the living room and into the foyer. To his right was the kitchen, and he could see a door leading outside through there. He eagerly walked that way and pushed open the door.

His jaw dropped. Who are these people? He lived in the wrong neighborhood.succulent flowers cascaded over arches in the neighbor’s garden. Pinks, purples, yellows, and every color in-between flooded Phil’s eyesight. The yard in front of him was absolutely beautiful. Like stars, fairy lights draped between pillars and tangled around lamp posts tastefully scattered about. The far side of the garden had some guy playing the violin next to a small outdoor bar. Also fully staffed. Phil wasn’t sure what song the violinist was playing, but it was nice, muffled and fading into the background due to the dense foliage around him. Phil’s lungs filled with air. Deep breaths felt nice. Perhaps all the greenery around him enhanced the oxygen in the air? Phil wondered.

The lights, flowers, and pillars were nice but the centerpiece of the garden really stole the show. There was a small hedge maze. Rich people things, Phil thought. In the center of the maze peeking over the tops of the bushes was what appeared to be a water fountain. Phil was drawn to it. Being the curious man that he is, Into the maze he went. Tiny lanterns lit the way. They were spread out evenly along the top edge of the maze. Within a minute of walking, Phil made it to the center. After completing it, Phil decided it was less of a maze and more of an intricate path.

The sound of the water trickling into the fountain was calming. It was loud enough to completely drown out the already muffled violinist. Phil sniffed a few times, intrigued. There must have been essential oils infused in the water. Lavender? Rose? Phil wasn’t sure, but it was nice. He smiled, letting himself surrender to the calmness. Until, that is, he was rudely broken out of his peaceful trance.

“Aghhh!” Phil screamed, hand flying to his chest. Instinctively he ducked down, nearly falling on his face. The hand that had covered his eyes was now under his chest, holding him up and preventing him from hitting the floor. Phil began to laugh, realizing what was happening. “Daniel!”

Dan’s cackle of a laugh danced through the air like Phil’s favorite song. “Got you, Phil.”

“Got me? I think I’m the one who’s got you!” Before Dan knew what was happening Phil spun around quickly and slammed Dan into the grass, straddling him. Both hands held Dan’s wrists above his head and pinned him to the ground. A sheepish look crossed Dan’s face and Phil couldn’t help but mirror his grin. “Yeah, I’ve definitely got you. In fact, I reckon I’ve had you for about 12 years now. All to myself.”

With the gentlest of motions, Phil bent down and brushed his lips against Dan’s, still holding him hostage on the floor. “I love you.”

“I love you too, Phil,” Dan said, prying Phil off of him. Now sat next to each other on the floor, Dan placed his head on Phil’s shoulder. The sounds of the fountain drowned out every sound except for the sound of each other’s breathing. They sat there, enjoying the silence. The peace that only they were able to bring one another. “...Phil?” Dan cocked his head slightly, looking up at Phil. To the surprise and slight horror of Phil, there were tears in Dan’s eyes. How many of Julian’s cocktails did he have?

“Did you ever think we would get this far? When we first met, did you ever really think that this was going to go anywhere?”

Phil smiled, wiping away the few tiny tears that had begun to roll down Dan’s cheeks. “None of that crying, you sap,” Phil said, kissing the top of Dan’s head. “And to answer your question, oh God, I hoped it would. I hoped we would. You have no idea how cute you were back then, do you?” Phil asked. “You’re still cute, of course. Wouldn’t want to cause any confusion there.”

“Oh trust me, I definitely know I’m cute,” said Dan, smiling. His tears had already mostly dried up. He was definitely slightly intoxicated. “But do say more.”

“All that pining,” said Phil. “You were such a FLIRT back then. You still are, but back then you were on another level. Obviously I had to reach out to the cutest emo boy commenting on my videos. I never thought anything would come of it until I met you for the first time. We hit it off right away. I didn’t know if it was going to be a friendship, a romance, a fling, or something else. But from that first day I met you, I knew you were something special to me, Dan. It was always you.”

Phil took two fingers and gently tilted Dan’s face upwards. He kissed him, firmly enough to surprise Dan a bit. Dan leaned into it matching Phil’s energy. They stayed that way, enjoying each other, for a few minutes. These moments of tender love were what made everything worth it at the end of the day, at least for Phil. All of the harassment from certain bad people on the internet, all of the hiding, all of the bad things they have had to go through over the years was all worth it just to be able to kiss Dan and call him his own. The love that Phil felt for Dan could not be matched. Dan was his best friend, his lover, and his soulmate. And Phil would sneak away from any party if it meant getting moments like this with him.

Phil broke their kiss and pulled Dan into a deep hug, burying his face into Dan’s hair. “I love you so fucking much Daniel Howell. You’re never allowed to leave me.”

Phil felt Dan smile into his shoulder. “Philip Michael Lester, you might be the only person in the world capable of convincing me that fate is real.”

You might not believe in fate but I know the truth. It was always you.”

“And it always will be me,” said Dan, closing his eyes, content in Phil’s arms.

“Companions through life?” asked Phil, breaking the hug to face Dan and look into his eyes. This was serious business. He extended out his pinky, never breaking eye contact.

“Actual soulmates,” said Dan, grabbing Phil’s pinky with his and shaking. The sacred vow of the pinky promise.

Phil smiled.

It was always him.

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