#Dam I still REALLY need to solidify that while yes

[awkwardpossum0]

Top ten reasons why I don't post a lot of my own Zelda au stuff. It either gets confused for LU or I'll straight up get bashed about my own au by LU fans. Like dam.

You can read about that here if ya like.

I've also strayed from drawing LU stuff in general, besides the occasional silly video, cause I know if I do it too often everything I post will be tagged as LU. Even when I do specify in the post or tags that what I drew wasn't LU it still gets tagged like it is.

Watch this. Y'all are gonna push me too far and instead of the LU designs, then I'm just gonna use their official in game designs and stop tagging LU in any of those silly videos. Maybe not though. 'Cause even if I put their in game models in the same room, y'all are still gonna tag it as LU when there's no indication that it is.

I did have an idea and designs for my own Link meets other Links au at some point. But I got so afraid of it being confused for LU that I never really shared a whole lot of it. But I have shown my Spirit Tracks and Skyward Sword designs before. But everything kept getting tagged at LU so I dwindled down on Spirit tracks a little and Skyward Sword a LOT.

Another thing is that LU uses the most common, memorable nicknames for the Links because each one is "The hero of " so if I used the same nickname then surely it's LU when it gets tagged.

LU fans are welcome on my blog and I have nothing against them, but could u guys please stop doing this... Its been years... My bones are getting squishy...

Its really hard to explain why it bothers me and so many other artists so much, but to give it a try: Imagine you baked a delicious cake to a potluck and everyone kept complimenting your neighbor Janice for the cake and you're too nervous to correct it cause Janice is the host. Please.... Please I can bake too... Pwease pweasep papa let me ba ke

[nona-piccolo]

Princes of Hell AU

Princes of Hell AU

Warnings: none, unless the mention of “hell” and demons bothers you

This is my own little AU where Obey Me brothers are genuinely princes of hell, and each of them occupy a Circle of Hell where the damned come to be eternally punished; there is no school, there is no RAD, and there is no funny banter 😈 When I had first played Obey Me, I always imagined a more darker story to the brothers, ones that involve fighting and action, and less of the romance aspect, especially since they are in fact demons, and each of them possess the burden of a sin. I always just thought it would be interesting to view them in a reign of power for a territory of their own. I also really really wanted to speak about the boys’ abilities and powers, so their strengths and combat is also talked about.

Please enjoy my little indulgence!

Okay so hear me out, there are seven rings of hell that occupy the space of the underworld. The worse of a person you had been on earth, the further into the ring you get placed in--- this also deals with the punishment that is endured. To put it simply, the rings are formed from 1 to 7: 1 being the least terrifying, while being placed in ring 7 is reserved for the worst and scummiest human beings. Taking off from there then, that leads us to the very first prince and owner of the 1st circle of hell:

Leviathan - 1st Circle of Hell:

They call this place Sheol. One thing that greatly differs Leviathan’s circle compared to the others is that fact that his circle is not a physical layer. There is no land. In fact, Leviathan's layer is almost sea-like, with spirits floating through the sky and composed of a sea of high whines of envy. The misty green layer is also the largest part of hell, considering it is the outer-most layer of the circle and takes up the most surface area. Leviathan is comfortable in his true form here (a giant beastly Leviathan) with eyes filled with envy to roam his territory. Leviathan is a powerful being, able to summon and control hideous demonic ocean creatures to do his bidding. His brothers are cautious if ever caught in a fight with him; Leviathan’s control can absolutely crush and overflood the other circles of hell. Many are terrified of him, and rumors had gone around saying he has the potential to become 2nd, maybe even 1st strongest of the Devildom, but his downfall and probably biggest weakness, is the time he spends moping about the things he doesn't have. The feeling of envy has crippled him to a pathetic and whiny ruler. Still, he appears to be one of the best of his brothers, as he doesn’t need to do much to care for the crying souls that wander around lifeless.

Asmodeus - 2nd Circle of Hell:

They call the 2nd Circle of Hell Dis--- the most laid back circle of all of them. Yes, even more so than Leviathan’s. Now you may think it would be odd, especially for Asmodeus’s circle to be placed where it is. But the people bound here for all eternity have the guilty pleasure of what Asmodeus finds entertaining. All demons and humans there are not tortured, with no laws, and given the ability to do whatever it is they desire. He likes to be surrounded by succubi and incubbi almost constantly. Asmo hates humans the least, and feels no need to want revenge. Being in hell and stripped of everything is punishment enough for him. Talking about abilities, Asmodeus himself would say that he isn’t fit for physical combat. Instead, he was given the ability to charm any creature or non creature he sees fit. With just a look in his eyes, he commands every bone in their bodies. Very few people are immune to this charm, but every once in a millennia he will meet someone who doesn't fall to his charm. This bothers him immensely.

Belphegor - 3rd Circle of Hell: 

Gehhena. That is the name of his circle. Opposite to his twin brother Beelzebub, Belphegor has a barren land of almost nothingness... Everything is shrouded with sloth, to the point where not even the air moves. Too lazy to make changes to his kingdom, there is a constant stagnation within his circle. His followers are left sitting there with nothing except constant loneliness and nothing to ease their boredom. Belphegor, the ruler that he is, sleeps on his throne any moment he can, and the crazed state he left his followers in have caused them to struggle with each other on who will get the throne. They feel they will go crazy if no one takes up Belphegor’s place. And so they plan to take his throne. Acting like he doesn't know about the plan to overthrow him, Belphie is pleased to spend all of eternity with the entertainment of watching his underlings argue to no end on who should sit on his throne. Belph doesn't seem like the brightest, especially due to his dozing and sleeping, but perhaps that's where he and Mammon are able to catch opponents off guard. Being underestimated is what Belph depends on, and frankly he seems to enjoy it just as much. He is the youngest of his brothers, and therefore the weakest physically, but his ability can be powerful in controlling what happens in other's dreams. This demon does his dirty work in the dream realm, having full and complete capabilities to cause disaster in his enemies through during their most vulnerable moments--- sleep. His constant state of sleep can ease others into a sleeping death, where the dream realm becomes Belphegor's greatest strength. He feels no need to try and climb the ranks higher. He is content where he is.

Mammon - 4th Circle of Hell:

Pandaemonium is the name of Mammon’s circle. Perhaps the greatest designed circle of hell, Mammon's image of what he wanted hell to look like is what came true on his land. He has complete control of what he wishes his kingdom will look like. As a great architect, he believes that hell could be just as great as heaven, and tried to prove it to Lucifer by designing Lucifer's very castle. Mammon’s land is filled with enormous landmarks and sky scrapers that appear to touch the stars. His circle of hell has the most impressive buildings and works of art, truly impressive to look at, but... as a ruler, Mammon isn't too good. There are still so many unfinished buildings and projects that he has abandoned in order for his subjects to mine and work in labor for eternity, finding the greatest diamonds and jewels within the ground to bring back to Mammon's castle. They needed to keep their master rich somehow. The work loads for his followers keeps increasing with every little thing Mammon craves for. More and more buildings, more and more diamonds, he can never get enough of it. Although rarely any violence ensures, his underlings constantly screw each other over in order to survive. And like his followers, Mammon is not particularly violent. In fact he shows more of a masochistic side, letting other people take out their frustration on him. This is ironic, due to Mammon's main ability being his luck. Among other demons and humans, his sheer luck and ability to gamble come in handy for him; getting him out of situation after situation. In the battlefield, he is often used as a decoy, his luck coming in handy to miss fatal wounds and strikes. It is also said Mammon's speed can rival Beelzebub's, yet he seems to run even faster if it's to get away from trouble. 

Beelzebub - 5th Circle of Hell:

Beelzebub’s circle was named Tantarus, or better yet the Tantarus Pit. It is a massive swamp, and with basically an "eat or be eaten" policy. His people are desperate in getting whatever they can in their search for sustainability. Although not particularly strict, Beel's attitude of eating whatever he wants can become a scary factor. He has many good cooks enslaved, whom make meals for him almost constantly. Much like Mammon, the people in the 4th circle of hell are forced into an everlasting workload. Yet unlike Mammon, Beelzebub has been known to get impatient, sometimes swallowing up the nearest thing he can find--- whether it’s a person, or the dinner table. He does not purposefully seek out trouble though, and prefers to keep to himself--- or with Belphegor. His circle is too far from Belphie, much to Beelzebub’s dismay, but Lucifer had simply brushed it off and told him he needed to deal with it. With super strength and speed, Beel is by far the physically strongest of his brothers. His frightening stature, height, and gluttony puts him at the very top of the list for being intimidating. Along with the constant intake of food, he makes sure to exercise and keep the bounds of muscles he has solidified on his body.

Satan - 6th Circle of Hell:

Satan owns the circle of Malebolge. There are two sides in Malebolge, and both sides are at constant war with each other. The pain and horror of war is everlasting and perpetual. Satan trains his people for the day they get a chance to attack the Celestial Realm. It is by far the most violent and frightening circle of hell. Satan is a monster fuming with hatred and insults. His control over his wrath had been let go a long time ago; he had let it overwhelm him and take control. To the point where Satan’s very presence on the battle field freezes opponents up in their tracks. Continuing to fight Satan for more than a few minutes will trigger his ability. He had all of eternity to practice thinking clearly through his anger and wrath--- it is no longer a roadblock to him. But he uses this as his greatest weapon. Fighting Satan for longer than a few minutes will provoke a growing rage inside of you; like the pressure of a dam against the heavy weight of water. His opponent will begin to think unclearly--- they will feel frustration and rage, giving Satan a chance to strike them down. Skilled and precise, he taught himself to suppress anything other than the rage he feels in order to kill more efficiently. Unlike his brothers, Satan prefers to use a sword in battle, and he can do so both methodically and elegantly (particularly Archangel Michael's sword that had fallen into Heaven with his other brothers).

Lucifer - 7th Circle of Hell:

Of course, the last and most dreadful circle of hell is reserved for Lucifer himself. Cocytus is what he had called it. This circle occupies the smallest space, taking the very center of the ring he and his brothers had formed. In the very middle lies Lucifer’s giant castle he had built just for himself. Lucifer's castle Helviti is where he stays, and where his most valuable followers and favorites live. The castle is all Lucifer really needs to be content. There are dreadful winds here, the cold and winter storms are drastically below freezing temperatures, keeping and reminding him that he could never ascend to the warmth of the Celestial Realm. So he is glad to have a warm place to stay in order to keep out the numbing weather. His people however... are left in a biting state of paralysis from the freezing cold; left out of the castle to rot. The most powerful of his brothers, Lucifer's cunning behavior and strict attitude are just added weapons alongside his ability of energy manipulation. Two of his six wings were disintegrated from his fall from Heaven to hell, and turned from a pure white to a rich black. He is also the only one who can control Cerberus, an enormous three-headed dog he keeps right by his side.

[silentprincess0302]

I’ve watched I Told Sunset About You at least 5 times in a row now, but I apparently have no one to rant to and I NEED to rant so bear with me.

First of all can we just appreciate how beautiful the story is? The way it’s portrayed, the way they talk, the location, songs, idk everything is just so poetic. I love how some scenes didn’t need words, and you’d understand it anyway. I love how there are no actual bad guys. The ones they are fighting with are themselves. And everyone has a personality. There’s a story in each and every one of those beautiful, well-written and portrayed characters. I’ll rant about how the story amazes me another time, I just need to focus on the two- Teh and Oh-Aew.

1. Teh

He’s an enigma. Like there’s so much going on with him and sometimes (or most of the times), he doesn’t even understand himself. And there’s so much added to his inner turmoil and identity that just makes me want to try and piece the puzzle but at the same time smother him with a pillow and blanket and yell “PLEASE REST AND BE HAPPY.”

First of all, his family. God, I can’t even start to say how much I relate to him with this. Being compared to hurts like hell. It’s like every thing you do, every step you take, you’d think “Would this be approved? Is this right? Or is this wrong and I’ll be compared again? Will they be proud of me? Will I ever be number 1?” You seek approval for your whole life. First your family, and it will branch out to your whole life. It’s haunting. He solidified his dream to become an actor because his mom was, for once, seemed so proud and excited at the prospect (I’m sure she is proud of him, it’s just that SHOWING it is another story).

And then there’s Oh-Aew. God. The person who shook his entire world. His entire being. If I’m to use Twighlight terms, I’d say he really imprinted on Oh-Aew, and it’s not hard to not see it. There’s a few posts talking about it on Tumblr, and I absolutely agree with them. It’s like, Oh-Aew is really the centre of his world (whether he realises it or not). I know they were kids when they fought, but that person has to be super important to you if it affects you that deeply. They say there’s a thin line between love and hate, and I think this is a good example of it. And to have a strong rivalry meant the love was strong as well- to be able to cross the line.

But “enemies” might be too strong of a word as well. It’s kind of funny, how Teh acts a bit tough and kind of picks a fight with Oh-Aew when what he did the moment he saw Oh-Aew was staring at him again and again. And it’s not even the hate kind of stare. Fascination? Wonder? Curiosity? Longing? Yeah, he talks big with Tarn about their “animosity ” but is it really animosity when he keeps staring, keeps scrolling through this person’s ig, keeps thinking about this person? Who the hell copies someone’s hairstyle if you want to be their enemy? Wouldn’t an enemy want something equally or more amazing, but different? Also he had the audacity to not acknowledge the fact that he was staring at him the whole damn day when Oh-Aew pointed it out. Oh Teh. This is just the tip of the ice-berg.

And when he finally made up with Oh Aew, the dam bursts. He thinks of ways to be close to him again, and not just as friends, but as BEST FRIENDS. He wanted to go “hardcore” immediately and chose his weapon- tutoring. He wanted Oh-Aew with him. He didn’t quite understand why, but he NEEDED Oh-Aew with him. And he wants Oh-Aew to acknowledge it, and see it the same way. He wanted to be special to Oh-Aew too, just like how he is to him. He gets unsettled and upset when he feels like he’s been treated the same as their other friends, and I find this so interesting. He went intense so quick, that I don’t doubt that these intense feelings were there since they were kids. It’s just, at that time, they were kids. As people age, feelings grow into different things, and I guess these their feelings grow to desire, fascination, longing, and love. (Also I squeal every time he admits this. “I don’t like it when ...”)

And his desire grew even more. The more time he spends with Oh-Aew, the more he seems to be wanting to possess him. To see him. To be in his presence. When Oh-Aew’s not there, he’s so unsettled. He touches random things, he paces, tosses around.. He’s lost. But his desire was so apparent. Sometimes, the way he looks at Oh-Aew, it seems like he wanted to devour him whole. This aspect, I feel, clicked when he sniffed his “friend”’s hair so intensely. Damn, the way he sniffed.. You can see the desire. He literally sniffed with his whole body!! Damn. And from there it gets intense and more intense. He’s suddenly aware of it bit by bit. “Coconut, coconut, coconut.” He went home, sniffed the coconut. I use the word sniff and it sounds super cute, but he didn’t do it very cutely haha. Sensual would be more fitting. The scent that he used to hate, is now the scent he seems to yearn as well. Desire by association?

I don’t think he’s stupid, and he’s damn aware that there’s something different he’s feeling about Oh-Aew. He might not understand it at that moment, so he started to play a bit dumb, continue with Tarn, and act “normal”. Is that really normal though, Teh? And Oh-Aew, bless his wit (or else we’ll forever see this static state) made him realize that boy, think different. Think, desire. Think, love. The scene at the beach, the coy atmosphere, was beautiful. I love how Oh-Aew coaxed him gently, and didn’t force him to come to him. To let Teh see him that way. The possibility. And when Teh just came to him, followed him around, desire just radiating in waves, eyes heavy-lidded with it,.. Ah, their relationship shifts yet again. And the scene where he “scratched” his back, Teh was almost lost in it. Almost gave in. Until he touched Oh-Aew’s chest and well damn. He’s a boy. And he slips away.

It’s not that simple, because this wasn’t his plan. He wanted to go to his chosen university, make his mom proud, make his family proud, succeed, have a good career, have a family with Tarn (which his mom apparently will be proud of so, bonus points). And where does Oh-Aew fit in this? Ideally, a friend would be perfect, but they’re not exactly friends, are they? But if he chooses Oh-Aew, what about his plans? His mom? The person who he seeks approval the most. It’s too much.

So he overcompensates with tutoring, the thing that made sense to him. What fits. But it hurts both of them. To Oh-Aew, who wanted Teh’s heart, and Teh, who also wanted Oh-Aew, but is trying to hold himself back and pushes Oh-Aew away, YET try to be close through tutoring. He wants to get away, but he can’t. He mentally, emotionally, and physically can’t. So he made the idioms book, in hopes Oh-Aew would appreciate it, and possibly forgive him (while staying friends?). But why was he lying to himself? The moment he saw Oh-Aew receiving his book, he couldn’t leave. He paced, and he peeked again. And he just can’t win. He’s lost in Oh-Aew’s presence and gaze, and the yearning builds up again, and he wanted to be close, close, close to Oh-Aew. He wanted to inhale his scent, inhale Oh-Aew. When they finally hugged behind the staircase, it’s like, ah, yes. I’m grounded again. (Also can we appreciate the music and cinematography during this scene? BEAUTIFUL). Still in this grounded trance, they went swimming, until oh, he’s pulled down, to a place where no one could see them, no one could judge them. And that’s when he finally let his yearning take over more and kiss him. Finally have him where he actually wanted him, but wasn’t possible due to the reality, the world, people around him. Masterpiece of a scene. Istg.

But of course, everything went straight to hell after. Sure, there were initial blissful moments, and then, when he realized that ah, this is the world again, he took two steps back, and broke Oh-Aew’s heart, and his own. And he knows this. Knows that he actually really damaged them now, and when he was told he couldn’t be friends anymore, it crushed him. How would he be able to live without Oh-Aew? His world. His anchor. So he grasped at things to save his world when he knows Oh-Aew was hurting, and made one desperate, big-scale attempt. Give up his place at university. His dreams. He gave everything to Oh-Aew. He can’t bear to see him suffer and lose his dreams, so he gave up his. I just, I can’t describe it in words.

This was a huge sacrifice. Might be the biggest sacrifice yet. And damn, Oh-Aew didn’t take it? He rejected his efforts, rejected him. The world he was protecting, rejected him (I’ll talk about Oh-Aew later). It hurts. And when he opened the pages of his book, it’s all cut out. He’d already given everything to Oh-Aew. And the one thing he had, the one weapon he had, tutoring, he can’t use it anymore. He just lost both his spot, and Oh-Aew. It hurts. It hurts.

I like that he was a bit passive aggressive at class, and he hinted that Oh-Aew shouldn’t have taken his efforts so lightly, etc. But when Oh-Aew didn’t quite return his passive aggressiveness, and he had this sincere exchange conversation with Bas instead, Teh’s world stopped again. How could Bas tell Oh-Aew what he wanted to tell him so easily? Why is everyone okay about it? How was it so easy? And there it is. He saw Oh-Aew smiling. “This was what I couldn’t give him. Now I lost him.”

He doesn’t have any more cards. No tutoring cards. He only had his words and his heart. But if he can’t fully accept himself, how’s he supposed to face Oh-Aew? Losing Oh-Aew was devastation. The conversation he had with Hoon was so important. The first time he confessed his feelings out loud. With words. And Hoon’s reply.. I just. Wow, he’s a wonderful brother. And ah, now that he had some acceptance, he could finally accept himself. But he can’t do anything at the moment of course, because Oh-Aew’s with Bas now.

So he fulfills his promise to Oh-Aew at least. I wonder what he was thinking at this point. Did he come to terms that he won’t be close to Oh-Aew anymore? Was he ready to let him go? AND THEN THE MIGHTY SCENE. When Oh-Aew said he just wants Teh to not disappear on him and could be anything Teh wants, Teh’s just like. “Ah. My world’s coming back together. And I’m ready.” “If I can be anything, can I be your boyfriend?”

UGHHHHH THE AMOUNT OF FEELS. Teh’s character is SUCH a journey, but it’s a book I’d love to read and reread, and discover the little things I haven’t discovered before. I love how complex he is, and that we can see so clearly his struggles, turmoil, yearning, and finally, acceptance.

2. Oh-Aew

One thing that I would love is more insight on Oh-Aew’s character. But he, too, is a whole character journey. Have you ever felt like you had no aim? Nowhere to head to, just a mindless walk?

Oh-Aew didn’t have a dream. He didn’t want anything, but it’s not like he’s doing it on purpose. It sounds like it’s nothing much, but imagine being in a desert. With no directions. Or like a dark room, where you desperately try to find a light, just somewhere to look at, somewhere to go, something to do.

And then he found it, his light. His passion. Acting. It’s like when a starved man finally sees food, or when a locked person finally sees the world. He sees motivation. He sees purpose. He sees something he could strive for, and make his parents proud of him. Now imagine that when you finally found that motivation and sense of purpose, someone who you care about, someone you hold dear and never thought would betray you, says you wouldn’t be able to do it, and that you’d give up anyways.

I don’t know how to stress this, but being told that you’re incapable of succeeding at a young age really affects your thinking. Humans by nature, don’t like to be told what they can or cannot do, and it’s the same for Oh-Aew. So he takes that as a challenge, and tries his whole life to prove Teh wrong. To be honest, it’s both a blessing and a curse. A curse because he had ongoing thoughts about how he needs to be the best, and that he needs to prove someone wrong. But a blessing because he now has another motivation to strengthen his attempts to reach his dreams. Personally, I, too, find competitions a push for me to be better. But it also had negative impact on me. I wasn’t satisfied with anything I achieved, I just wanted to bulldoze through. And if there’s even a smallest mistake, I’d beat myself up. It’s not a healthy lifestyle.

And when he finally met with this person again, not only did he keep on staring at him, he also brought up his academic weakness and implied that he’ll fail. Again. Again. And what’s worst is he was partly right. He didn’t get the placement.

Okay I’m going to stop there for Oh-Aew’s motivation and ambition, because I’ll get emotional lol I relate too much. So on to Teh.

What’s interesting about Oh-Aew is that I’m not really sure what he’s thinking, and he’s quite a mystery. But at the same time, he has this presence that’s just, healing and addictive. He doesn’t force, doesn’t push. He coaxes, he’s gentle. But he knows what he wants, and he’s clear about it. I’d love to know the thoughts he had for Teh when they met, though. Because, even though we weren’t shown what was going through his head, or the degree of which he thought of Teh, he obviously sees Teh as different from the rest.

When Teh told him he’s upset that he’s being treated like everyone else, Oh-Aew was just like. “Bestie, why didn’t you tell me? Let me affirm your position. Here’s my big secret.” WITHOUT hesitation. He didn’t think it was weird or anything, all he wanted was to make Teh smile again. And he’s so in tune with Teh. Whenever Ten’s upset, he just knows, asks, and he’ll wait for Teh to be ready, and when he’s ready, he’ll listen to Teh and comfort his unease. I understand how Teh would be so entranced. Oh-Aew was like a breath of fresh air, the quiet comfort, yet alluring and addictive.

And one of my favorite parts would be when Teh told him to not give his time to others, Oh-Aew said it to him right back with such a challenging look on his face. And I think it’s interesting, because he doesn’t really show that much aggression (it wasn’t really aggressive, but he had a harder tone than usual). It shows how Oh-Aew is quite clever in hiding what he wants to hide, or maybe he could even store it in a secret box inside his head and try to ignore it. I’m saying this because we kept seeing how Teh checked and rechecked who saw his story with Tarn, but he couldn’t see Oh-Aew’s name, and Oh-Aew didn’t really seem affected by it. But when Teh mentioned about time, he suddenly took off mask and it’s as if he said, “You’re bothered with me giving your time to others? Okay my bad, but you’re also giving my time others. You think I don’t know? I’m also bothered.” And at this point I was like, ah, so Oh-Aew does notice. And he does gets bothered. It continues on to Teh sniffing the hell out of his hair and he’s just like what? And he thinks, and he thinks, and he looks at the coconut shampoo. And he thinks.

Teh.

And he puts on more shampoo, which suggested how he actually welcomes the thought of Teh liking the smell on him. He wants Teh to like him. More coconut, more coconut. Like me.

But he’s patient, Oh-Aew is. He doesn’t push Teh, he just observes, tests, and when he’s quite sure, he launches his gentle yet dangerous attacks. He made sure Teh was looking at him, thinking of him (not that he actually needed to, Teh was already full of Oh-Aew thoughts HAHA but it does help, to push Teh a bit), and he coaxes. He introduced the possibility of them gently.

But how long could a person wait? How many times can a person get rejected? When he realized he liked Teh, he didn’t tip toe his way around Teh like he did with Bas, he went full force. It’s like, just as Teh was like a hungry lion, Oh-Aew was a prey enticing to be eaten. He wanted to be eaten. He liked Teh’s attention, wanted Teh’s attention, more than anything. He wanted him. After all, Teh was behind his motivation his whole life. He wanted Teh to see him, to love him, to embrace him. Accept him. How long can he be patient? The lion knows he’s hungry, but he refuses to eat. Yet; the lion keeps the prey to himself, to his clutches, to his territory. But the lion won’t do anything directly, so is the prey not worthy enough to be eaten? If not, why put it in the lion’s yearning clutches?

Every time Teh seemed to move forward, Oh-Aew gets disappointed when he moves two steps back. And it’s maddening, because now Teh is just at the center of his world, but he can’t access it. There’s a wall, and this wall keeps him from truly being with Teh. And he’s so addicted to Teh, to Teh’s attention, and he wants more. He had the taste of it, but just as he gets to taste- it’s gone. And he knows why. And it goes back to his own anxiety of being not worthy. Not worthy of a dream, not worthy for a person. Are his parents even proud of him? He desperately tried to change, maybe if I change my gender, he’d like me? He’d accept me? But of course it’s not possible; and it breaks him. Is he even worthy of anything?

And he decided to give up. I might be just assuming, but it’s as if “I’m not smart, why bother. I’m not lovable, why bother.” And he wanted to lock himself in that dark room again, to be aimless, to be numb, to not feel anymore of the pain of not being enough.

And this is the part where I want to rant the most. His rejection of Teh’s place in university. Yes, at first I questioned it too, but did he look happy at all when he rejected it? People have mentioned that Teh’s sacrifice was the answer to Oh-Aew’s earlier question “If the teacher chose you, would you have given it to me?” (Somewhere along these lines). That yes, he would give it up to Oh-Aew.

But Oh Aew too, was answering an accusation made on him. He doesn’t, and never did, want to steal Teh’s dream. All he wanted was an inspiration, a rival to compete with, not to crush. Not to destroy. To me, Teh giving up his place could mean two things to Oh-Aew: Teh was first offering to be destroyed, and second, it would mean that the whole rivalry, inspiration, chase, ambition was colored gray when before it was a burning bright red. There was an idiom that they learned, “Easy pickings.” To get something when you didn’t put so much effort in. And I think, if I was in his place, I’d feel that it was an easy picking, because someone intentionally gave it to him on a silver platter. More so, his love, his rival, his inspiration gave it to him, like the whole competition didn’t matter. I don’t know the intention of the writers, but I feel that it was like Oh-Aew also didn’t want to be the one holding the knife of destroying Teh’s dream. Because he never wanted to. And the competition, the inspiration to his ambition and growth which all started and continued from and around Teh, would mean less. To be a competent rival, he needs to get there by himself.

Also I think if he did accept it, it would be a whole cycle again. Teh would have a card, and he’d never realize that the card’s not what Oh-Aew wants. Oh-Aew only wants his heart. Both of them needed this. Teh needed to know this, and Oh-Aew needed a push to realize his supposed purpose and motivation again. Which he will achieve, by himself, with his own hands, as a worthy rival. And if he gets it, he can say HE did it. He won’t have to feel guilty all his life for “stealing” Teh’s place. Damn. I’ve always wanted to say this since I don’t see much about people talking about Oh-Aew’s side in this.

On to Bas, it’s actually quite heartbreaking to see how he treated Oh-Aew exactly how he wanted. To be accepted and loved without hesitance, to hold hands without a care in the world, to be able receive love without walls. Bas is truly golden. But it’s just not who Oh-Aew wanted. He wasn’t quite Teh, and Bas knows this, and guided him back to Teh. UGH BAS I HOPE YOU FIND SOMEONE AND BE HAPPY.

And finally, the sunset scene. I like how he didn’t apologize about the university placement, but he knew he didn’t want to lose Teh. He already accepted that he might not be what he wants to be by Teh’s side, but he’s willing to take it. Anything. He just wants Teh to not disappear again. And oh, Teh suddenly confessed.

AAAAAAAAAA I CAN’T GET OVER THIS T.T The series is SOOOOO beautiful and well-written. I’m so nervous for Part 2. Pls don’t give them a sad ending. PLEASE. I BEG YOU. Or I might really hypnotize myself to forget the second part and only remember the first one. And and if anyone wants to talk to me and discuss this with me please do!!!!! I love a good discussion T.T and I’m lonely hELP I need to talk about it with someone

[mimiswitchywrites]

Not A Burden: Chapter 7

TW: SH references, attempted s****de and references, child/s***al a**se references (not graphic but enough that could be triggering).

Master list or read on AO3

1.8k words

If you want to be tagged for updates, message me or comment!

One more chapter tomorrow and then a week or so of hiatus while I sort some life stuff out

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Merlin had been dreaming about a certain sandy haired royal for the last few weeks and he couldn’t figure out if he loved it or hated it. It made serving him far harder than it needed to be as all he could think about was the way dream Arthur had pinned him to his desk as he cleared it or how dream Arthur would give him the day off so they could go to the market together and how real Arthur would never do something like that. Real Arthur could barely look at him, let alone want to go out in public with him like that. On the other hand, dream Arthur was really fucking hot, and Merlin enjoyed that. He knew he could never have real Arthur, so it made him happy to at least have a version of him at night.

Was that sad? Maybe a little.

But, regardless of his feelings towards these dreams, he did not appreciate them being interrupted. Especially not by his frantic father-figure. Especially not when Dream Arthur had just got onto his knees and was beginning to undo the ties on Merlin’s breaches…

Gaius was rather insistent that Merlin wake up and help him find Miriam who, he guessed as he hadn’t really been listening properly, had vanished. He threw on yesterday’s clothes, too tired to look presentable, and made his way into the main chamber where, unsurprisingly, the spare cot was empty. He sighed, giving into the fact that he wouldn’t be getting anymore sleep, and ran out the door to ask the guards at the bottom of the stairs if they had seen her. Well, tried to run. Instead, he ended up inches from headbutting Miriam and, Lancelot? The latter of which seemed to be leaning in for a kiss that the former looked as if she really didn’t want to partake in.

He heard Gaius sigh from inside the room and settle down to get started on the days work. After letting the poor girl hurry inside and close the door behind her, Merlin decided to have some fun (it was only fair after such a rude start to the morning which Lancelot had played his part in.)

He started with a raised eyebrow, something he was getting far better at after being on the receiving end of Gaius’ for so long. The love-struck knight stuttered, trying to form a feeble defence.

“You know, out of all the knights, I thought you were the most responsible. Kidnapping a sick, defenceless young maiden? Whatever would the king say?” He bit his tongue to keep from laughing at Lancelot’s reddening face. He cracked, snorting unceremoniously and slapping the man’s arm in the hopes of getting him to lighten up a little.

“Relax, my friend, I don’t tell Arthur of every person his knights sneak off with – I would be there for years on Gwaine alone.” Lancelot finally let out a small laugh, still hot with embarrassment.

“I apologise if we worried you, I meant to have her back before you woke but we got… distracted.” He drifted off, thinking about how beautiful the shadows her lashes had cast on her cheeks as they watched the stars were.

“Distracted?” Merlin gave him a look that said: ‘you-know-how-much-that-sounds-like-you-took-a-tumble-in-the-hay-right?’ and, for the umpteenth time that morning, Lancelot turned beet red. He cleared his throat, scratching the back of his neck and stumbling over No’s and That’s Not What I Meant’s.

Merlin could only shake his head at his friend, once again clamping his mouth shut to avoid laughing at him. He loved Lancelot like a brother, but the poor man was helpless, sometimes. He shoved the man gently, finally telling him to leave and get some sleep before training started in a few hours. The flushed knight (who, Merlin observed, matched the red of Camelot’s banner remarkably) made his way down the stairs, playing the night over and over, in his head.

It had not ended quite as he would have liked but gods be dammed, it was one of the best meals Lancelot had ever had. His free hand (the other still holding the picnic basket) ghosted over his lips, imagining how hers would have felt pressed against them.

--

Merlin entered the chambers, hopping into his room to prepare himself for his day with the king. Arthur would be holding a council meeting that afternoon so Merlin had to brush up on the topic (they would be discussing solidifying more roads between Camelot and its villages to help with trade, he was falling asleep just thinking about it) and he still needed to wash off the sweat from his dreams the previous night.

He made his way down to the kitchens first, parchments about the roads under his arm, and gathered the King’s breakfast, and an extra roll and sausage for himself. He overheard Cook muttering about how she needed more hands around and that one of her ‘good for nothing’ staff had stolen the excess that was meant to go to the dogs. He kept that in mind and made his way up to the Royal Chambers, nearly tripping over on one of the many staircases, only just keeping all the food on it’s platter.

Nodding to the guards on watch, he opened the door with his elbow and shuffled in backwards, knocking over the chair that was dangerously left in the doorway. Arthur moaned from his bed (a sound that Merlin knew he would end up replaying that evening once Miriam and Gaius were asleep) and pulled his pillow over his face. After dropping the breakfast on the table, Merlin made his way to the curtains, pulling them open.

“Up and at ‘em, time to brighten the Lords’ day with your cute little face” Merlin intended to say this with a sarcastic lilt but, distracted by those mouth-watering abs, failed to.

Arthur slowly pulled the pillow from his face, a look of confusion on his features as he watched his pitiful manservant watch him in some sort of daze. The pillow went flying from his hands, bashing Merlin back to reality.

Why must such a prat be so beautiful, he pondered as he gathered the Kings clothes for the day. He chose the tighter white shirt which he knew would be soaked after training later. He blushed at the thought, hiding a grin as he rummaged through the cupboard.

Arthur groaned, bringing his hands up to his face and rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. If Merlin had to wake him up each morning, why couldn’t it be something nice like with a kiss or his long fingers adventuring? Was that truly so much to ask? Well, to fantasise about – Arthur knew there was no way he could actually ask for that. Merlin could say no or tell someone which would lead to a civil war or him overthrowing or, even worse, he could say yes and then Arthur would be the one that had to say no to prevent the aforementioned civil war or overthrowing. Arthur quite liked his head being attached to his body, but he knew it was unlikely to stay that was if his people discovered that he had certain inclinations towards men. Merlin was incapable when it came to keeping secrets and one as big as sleeping with the king was too much of a risk.

Arthur groaned again, finally rolling out of bed and allowing Merlin to help him into his clothes. He picked at his food, giving the leftovers to Merlin because gods knew he didn’t eat enough. The boy looked exhausted and sat on the trunk at the end of Arthurs bed as he devoured a sausage (don’t you dare go there, Arthur).

Pushing out from his chair, Arthur leant back against the table, so they were facing each other.

“What’s got you so tired? Sneaking off to the whore house in the dead of night?” Gods, he hoped that wasn’t it. He didn’t like how jealousy bubbled in his chest at the thought. Merlin’s brows shot up, practically jumping off his head, and he choked on the bread roll that he had tried devouring in a single bite. The boy turned red as he struggled to breath and Arthur, being the gallant knight that he was, hit him on the back, dislodging the food and perhaps a vertebra or two. His hand lingered longer than it should have, rubbing a few gentle circles before dropping to his side.

Finally getting air into his lungs, Merlin responded, “Took me forever to get to sleep and then I dreamt all night and didn’t get any proper rest and then, before the sun had even risen, Gaius woke me to say that Miriam had gone missing.” At that, Arthur straightened, worrying about the girl. Merlin noticed the way his eyebrows furrowed, and eyes drifted to the door and so added, “she was okay, she snuck off with Lancelot on a date or something. He said they got ‘distracted’.” Merlin wiggled his eyebrows at this, and Arthur’s head tipped back, laughing.

“I was hoping they would return at a decent hour, I’m sorry they caused you to lose sleep. Because, well you know, you’re terrible at your job when you’re tired?” A sloppy attempt at his usual façade but Arthur was busy focusing on the purple bags under Merlin’s eyes. He wanted to rub the pad of his thumb over them, cupping his face. The boy really should sleep more. He would get a great night’s rest in a bed like Arthurs (especially after their activities exhausted him). Arthur turned away from Merlin, forcing himself to get his thoughts under control.

“Wait,” said Merlin, finally catching up, “you knew about this?”

Arthur paused to think about his answer. Should he not have known? He hadn’t meant to, but he’d bumped into Miriam and they had a particularly useful conversation which he was sure Merlin would be proud of. “Yes?”

“Are you asking me that?” Merlin’s lipped curled at the ends and Arthur’s heart fluttered.

“I knew, yes. I found Miriam looking out at the courtyard in a brooding stance that would put even my father to shame. We talked and I think things are mostly resolved between us. Turned out she was only up there as she got lost trying to find Lancelot, so I lead her down to him and they went off. Looked like he had a basket, so I believe they had some sort of late-night picnic. It seemed sweet, really.” He muttered the last part, craving the opportunity to take Merlin on a picnic – late-night or otherwise.

Merlin hopped off the trunk (with the grace of a drunk, new-born, calf) and closed the distance between the pair, tentatively placing his hand on his master’s bicep. “I am glad you talked; I know you were struggling with the idea of doing so.” Arthur turned his head to look at Merlin. He loved the soft blue ocean that coloured his eyes and, had they been anywhere else, been anyone else, he would spend days looking into them. But he was the King, Merlin was his servant, and Camelot was no place for such things.

“Don’t be such a girls petticoat, Merlin.” They both ignored the break in Arthur’s voice.

“Prat.” Merlin offered in response.

Arthur watched out the window as Merlin cleared their breakfast up and tidied the mess Arthur had somehow managed to create between his dismissal and waking the clot pole up. There was a comfortable silence between the two that they had mastered over the half decade of knowing each other. At some point, Arthur turned to watch his manservant as he flittered about the room, sweeping clothes under the bed with his foot and wiping shapes into the table as he cleaned it. He truly was terrible at his job and yet Arthur didn’t think he had ever been matched with someone so well.

None of his previous servants would tolerate questions such as: “So, what were you dreaming about that kept you from resting so?” Merlin stopped in his tracks (bent over the bed, arse in the air, as he put the duvet back in its place. Arthur had to bite his knuckles to avoid doing anything he would regret.) He straightened and Arthur swore he could see a blush forming.

“Nothing really, I mean, I don’t remember. Dreams are so hard to remember and all that, right? I don’t remember. Uh,” he cleared his throat, “why?” A pause, “What did you dream about, sire?”

His previous servants most certainly wouldn’t ask something like that.

“You know what, I think I have training to lead now. We should go.” He nodded to himself, Merlin mimicking – still red – and the pair swept out of the room.

[chilling-seavey]

Blurb on “The boy who broke his best friend's heart was back” - Prologue, ABM ~T

Our sweet best friend era Florence and Daniel coming back strong x Plus who could be opposed to newborn Clementine??

Florence still lived at the Clifford’s for a few weeks after Clementine was born until she was able to find an apartment with Matt. This honestly just left Matt to still live on his campus and be out partying 24/7. Florence figured it was his last days of freedom before they were going to settle down and become serious, but as you from the beginning of ABM, his partying never really slowed down. Daniel could kind of sense that was what was going to happen from all the stories Florence had told him about Matt back in high school. Daniel always had this pre-conceived idea about Matt and who he was as a person before even meeting him…but meeting him only solidified those thoughts.

It was apparent that from the very day Daniel met Florence that he would do anything for her, especially protecting her from heartache since being dumped by Matt back in high school broke her. Still, Daniel was more than happy to sweep up the pieces of her heart and honestly be the reason she even trusted males again in general.

When Daniel showed up to the hospital when Clementine was born, he felt a whole bunch of incredibly strong emotions; joy, sadness, relief, love. But when Matt came into the room and Florence said that they got back together, Daniel felt like the one whose heart just got smashed. He had never told Florence but after he left to head back to his dorms, he got himself into the shower and cried hard. After everything he had said to her to help her get over him, rehashing how much Matt had hurt her to keep her pushing forward, Daniel felt like it was all for nothing.

He didn’t give up on her though, hell no. She had just had a baby with a guy who was basically scum of the earth and Daniel would be dammed if he left her to fend for herself.

So the very next day, Daniel woke up early and got dressed and stopped by the florist on his way back to the hospital. The nurse at the desk gestured him into the same room as yesterday and he thanked her with a nod before knocking lightly at the door.

Florence looked up from where she was sat on her bed with the baby in her arms and sent him a surprised grin, “Hey, Dani!”

“Good morning, you two.” Daniel smiled, inching his way into the room and held out the small bouquet of pink roses to her. “Little something I saw on the way here.”

“You’re too sweet.” Florence smiled, pulling him down to press a kiss to his cheek.

“Where’s Matt?” Daniel asked as politely as he could muster.

“Sleeping probably. He was really hungover yesterday so he’s sleeping it off still I think.” Florence mumbled, looking back down to the baby in her arms and adjusted the little hat on her head.

“Did you sleep okay?” Daniel asked.

“Not really. It was lonely.” Florence sighed, running her finger over her daughter’s full cheek before cooing down at her, “But darling Clementine and I kept each other company. Didn’t we, sweet girl?”

“I would have stayed with you.” Daniel said.

“I know you would have. But we’re not your responsibility.”

Daniel kept his snide remarks to himself, glancing back to the door as if expecting him to come barging in again. But no one came.

When the nurse came by to do a check up to see how Florence was doing, Daniel got to hold the baby for a second time and his hesitant expression turned nearly gleeful in a millisecond. He stood by the window across the room overlooking the city with the day old newborn in his arms and he rocked her lightly as he hummed a little tune and simply stared at her. Clementine stared right back through heavy eyelids, blinking slowly in the bright light around them.

“Do you remember my voice?” Daniel cooed softly down at her, hesitant to move too much in fear of dropping her but he carefully slid his left hand up from her back and pressed his finger against her tiny palm. “Remember when I would sing to you? And talk to you? And when you promised to wait until I was back from home on the 3rd?”

Clementine wrapped her fingers around his one and Daniel beamed at her.

“Okay, I forgive you.” Daniel leaned down to kiss her teeny tiny hand. “You’re so heckin’ cute. Cuter than I pictured even!”

“Looks like everything is progressing well! You’re definitely able to leave today if you’re feeling up to it.” The nurse said, interrupting Daniel’s own little world he was in and he glanced over as the nurse was washing her hands and throwing away her gloves.

Florence smiled from the hospital bed, “I would like that very much.”

“So we’ll book you to check out by late afternoon then, does that work?”

“Yes, thank you.” Florence said as the nurse left the room.

“You can go home already?” Daniel gaped, turning around to the room with the baby still rocking lightly in his arms and clinging onto his index finger.

“Apparently.” Florence smiled at the sight of him, her face falling into a pout, “Oh my goodness is she holding your hand?”

“Yeah!” Daniel grinned and walked over to sit beside her. “She’s my new best friend, I think.”

“Can I steal your new best friend from you and ask you to help me pack?” Florence asked.

“Of course.”

Daniel swallowed back his question as to Matt’s whereabouts and followed her instruction to put her bag back together and by the door and then they called Michael together to keep him up to date with pick up times. Daniel didn’t bring up the ‘read’ text messages sent to Matt that he saw on her screen.

Matt didn’t show up all day; not to help her pack or load the car or get settled back at the Cliffords. Daniel, on the other hand, didn’t leave her side and he kept Florence company all day, carried the baby to the car in her carrier, and got Florence back into bed at home. Michael and Luke had already put fresh sheets on for her and they started her laundry of her things from the hospital, and Daniel heard them whispering on his trip to fetch Florence a glass of water about how upset they were that Matt was back. Daniel didn’t blame them. But it still didn’t feel like he was back...where was he?

When Daniel got back with a glass of water, Florence was feeding the baby and talking on the phone at the same time so he paused just around the corner to give her privacy.

“I’m just saying, you could have shown up.” Florence said.

There was a pause.

“Yeah, I know you weren’t feeling well but I just-“ “Matt.” “I know. I’m not saying-“ “...” “Fine.” “Yeah.”

Daniel turned into the room and she glanced up at him before looking away again almost shamefully.

“Fine.” she mumbled into the phone. “Message me later. Love you? Bye.”

Daniel physically clenched his jaw through the pain that the word ‘love’ shot through his heart but he stayed quiet and set the glass of water on the bedside table.

“Thank you, Dani.” Florence whispered, adjusting the baby in her arms.

Daniel kept his gaze anywhere else but at her as she nursed, busying himself with one of the toys from the crib, “Was that Matt?”

“Yeah.” Florence sighed.

“Is he coming over?”

“Not today, no.”

“Why not?”

“Dunno. He’s busy I guess.”

“Too busy to be with his...new daughter?” Daniel couldn’t get himself to say ‘girlfriend’.

“I don’t want to fight with you, Dani.” Florence mumbled.

“It’s not fighting.” Daniel said, petting the stuffed giraffe’s mane repeatedly out of nervousness from the conversation at hand. “You should know you deserve better.”

“It’s only been one day.”

“Yeah, and it’s only been eight months of you crying over this guy and how he broke your freaking heart.” Daniel grumbled.

“Daniel, please.” Florence sighed. “I’m tired. I don’t want to talk about this.”

Daniel looked over at her just as the newborn finished nursing and he whipped his head back to the opposite wall, his cheeks flashing red, and he cleared his throat nervously, setting the toy back in the crib. “I don’t like seeing you being treated badly.”

“That’s why I have you, right?” Florence said softly.

“Of course.” Daniel sighed.

“It was my fault for getting with him in the first place...now I gotta deal with the consequences.” Florence shrugged.

“No you don’t. You deserve better.” Daniel kept his eyes down.

“I’m decent now, you shy boy.” Florence broke their tension with a little joke and he turned to face her again as her shirt was back in place and she patted the baby’s back gently. “Wanna burp her?”

Daniel couldn’t hold back his smile and he nodded, rushing over to her bedside and tossed a burp cloth over his shoulder like it was second nature. Florence then carefully passed over the newborn and Daniel got her rested against his chest with her cheek squished against his shoulder, her tiny arms draped around his neck.

“Oh my goodness.” Daniel cooed, patting her back with his palm, gently but still firm, exactly how they were taught in those classes he had accompanied Florence to. “Sweet little angel.” Daniel pressed a soft kiss to the baby’s head before starting to pace the room as he burped her.

He sang her song softly until she fell asleep on his shoulder; fed, burped, and ready for bed. Florence patted the bed in front of her and Daniel carefully leaned down to lay the baby on the comforter. He watched carefully as Florence unbuttoned the onesie and changed the baby as if making mental notes, gladly bringing her things as she needed them and putting them back away when she was done, all while Clementine slept soundly.

“She’s so good.” Daniel whispered, brushing his hand carefully over the baby’s thin hair as Florence buttoned her into her fresh onesie, the one the boys bought her as a gift, white with a single clementine fruit on the chest.

Florence leaned forward to press a gentle kiss to her daughter’s nose before sitting back and running her hand over the baby’s tummy. She looked up at Daniel who was still stood beside the bed, “Wanna put her down?”

“Can I?” he beamed.

With a nod from Florence, he carefully wiggled his hands under the sleeping baby and brought her up close to his chest. She stirred a little, whining in his arms as he adjusted her and shushed her softly, patting her back a little as he carried her over to the crib and then laid her down.

“Do you have plans for tonight?” Florence asked suddenly, tearing Daniel’s attention away from the sleeping baby.

“No. Why?”

“Can you stay over with me?”

Her voice was soft and quiet and almost hesitant, as if suggesting he sleep over was a foriegn concept to either of them.

But Daniel smiled and nodded in agreement, “Still have my drawer of spare clothes?”

“Of course.” Florence grinned.

So Daniel got into pyjamas and they got ready for an early bed together after a long day. It wasn’t their most peaceful sleepovers as the baby woke up to be fed every so often, but Daniel wouldn’t have wanted to be anywhere else.

[theseerasures]

Frozen 2 Reactions, Pass #2

went to see the movie again yesterday, which helped solidify a few more thoughts percolating in the back of my head. i don’t think this one will be QUITE as long as the first, but everything’s going under a cut anyway because i’ve met me

tbh most of this is just me dunking on Elsa

one of the things that i think both helped AND hindered the movie is that they really did make an effort to make the sequel its own separate story from the original--hence the timeskip, the retcons, and so forth. on the positive end of things there’s obviously a much lower barrier of entry for the like...three people who never watched the first movie, and the characters get to feel more grown up while remaining (thanks no doubt to the writing team remaining much the same) consistent enough that the changes to their personalities still make sense. it never feels like it’s retreading old ground, and if fans want to connect the new ideas and themes to the older material (and i count myself among those, what with my first fic in almost four years being about exactly that), there are plenty of kernels with which to do so.

on the other hand: some of the new plot stuff really just DOESN’T work with what’s already been established. chief among those is the idea that ~~~the story of the enchanted forest with requisite creepy lullaby~~~ is a well remembered bedtime story for BOTH Anna and Elsa?? like what does this imply about their childhood? that their parents told them this same bedtime story over and over again, but separately in their own respective rooms? that Elsa got charming bedtime stories about magic-based conflict and war???

(”yeah papa!!! please tell me again about how magic can not only kill people but also SUNDER AN ENTIRE LAND FROM REALITY, that story’s my favorite!!! looking forward to some really spirited nightmares tonight!”)

or are we supposed to assume this is like. the thing bad Batman writers try to do where everything poignant that has ever happened to Bruce happened the night his parents were murdered? that Elsa and Anna remember the story only because it was the night of the Accident (tm)? because that’s...also stupid, i gotta say.

i love that Elsa’s verse in this song start with “the winds are restless” bc it’s exactly the way i imagine her starting conversations with her hapless subjects. “good morning, Your Majesty! how goes the kingdom?” “the winds are restless” “...” “...” “...yes. that was...something i noticed as well”

Local Sisters Make Every Time They See Each Other in Town a God Damn Event

ever since @professorspork pointed out how stupid the “and i promise you the flag of Arendelle will always fly” line is in Some Things Never Change i haven’t been able to stop laughing about it. it’s just such a BLATANT telegraph: “whooo!!! yes! Arendelle!!! we all love that place and want to save it, and you can tell because the song said so!”

the Friends shot of them all walking back to the castle and Anna has kicked her heels off is great though i love it

also love the multitude of shots where it’s Elsa and someone else and we get a peek at her silent reactions to whatever the other person is saying. not since Legolas have we been blessed with so many memeable dumb faces

“ah yes, Mama’s words! cuddle close, scootch in! you remember her saying that all the time right Elsa?? after all it’s not like you have any decade-long baggage about not being able to be near anyone, most especially family members, because you were deathly afraid that you’d instantly murder them”

more thoughts on why Into the Unknown stands out so vividly in my mind: the first movie’s songs by and large did a VERY good job of moving plot around while still exploring character emotion. Do You Want to Build a Snowman moves us through ten YEARS of story, while still leaving space for long, unsung moments where we just get to process what’s going on between the sisters as they grow up. For the First Time in Forever catches us up with the sisters, gets the gates open, and has Anna meet Hans at the end, a pivotal moment for both her and the plot. Love Is an Open Door has them get engaged and sets up the rest of the story. Let It Go is Elsa’s big character shift and sets up the goal for the other characters: the ice palace is where they all need to go to bring back summer. the FtFTiF reprise begins the endgame. the other songs are all more fluff pieces that JUST serve to introduce characters, which is why they’re...not as good, and most people don’t really care about them, but we can accept that they’re there because the strength of the other material.

with Frozen 2...Into the Unknown is pretty much the ONLY song that fits into the first category: Elsa works through her conflicted feelings about wanting to explore the unknown, AND wakes up the spirits (sidebar: her pure joy at using her powers to communicate with the spirits is SO GOOD, guys. it gets me every time). the other ones just kind of transporting their singers into the Emotional Expression Dimension for them to do their thing. sometimes the songs transport them to the next plot point while they’re singing, but nothing really happens DURING them. i can give Some Things Never Change a pass on this because it’s supposed to be about stasis (and because i’ve bitched about it enough on other fronts), but much as i love Lost in the Woods and Next Right Thing for their character exploration they’re really just music videos to get us to the next scene. Next Right Thing is particularly egregious about locking the plot in the boot--the ENTIRE sequence is just Anna climbing or slumping against random rocks until the song ends and she can actually move the story along. one could make an argument that Show Yourself does get stuff done, but it’s still mostly Elsa running around in a cave for three entire minutes before we get to that point

i don’t think Get This Right is perfect but it DOES pull off the multitasking well, and it would have not only resolved the torturously stretched engagement subplot early on but creates a nice thematic echo to Love Is an Open Door: she really knows Kristoff, she really loves him, and she proposes. it’s her choice.

Kristoff’s line about question of how/question of whether works great for highlighting his continued insecurities, but again: either we’re supposed to think he’s wrong and Anna has ALSO been thinking in terms of how and she’s just been too busy in sister-drama-land, and this whole plot should have been resolved early, or we’re supposed to think that Anna really ISN’T on the same page, in which case they...probably should have a serious conversation about where they see their relationship going and not just get engaged at the end because Elsa made a new dress

as soon as an HD version comes out i demand a gifset juxtaposing Anna slumped against a rock with Anna slumped against Elsa’s door at the end of Do You Want to Build a Snowman, because this whole sequence is where the distance between sequel and original really WORKED. Anna is singing about how alone she feels, how she’s never felt such darkness before, when we know that that’s...not true. she's felt pretty close before--not long ago that was her whole LIFE. it’s natural for her to feel this way, because being knocked off your happiness always hurts more than never having it in the first place, but we the audience get to have faith in her, because we remember. eventually she does too, and now she knows exactly how resilient she can be, exactly how strong she’s ALWAYS been.

the animated faces are SO GOOD. we see Anna flicker through seventeen feelings at once when Kristoff rescues her from the dam: delayed fear, relief, and--this is the crucial one for me--horror that she survived, because that means she’s going to have to live with the fact that Elsa didn’t.

Elsa riding into the sunset of her sapphic life is great obviously but every time i see it i worry that the movie is going to end with the same face smear effect as the Prisoner of Azkaban movie

[flos-timore]

Send me a  🥃 + a question for my muse to answer. If they refuse to answer, they have to take a shot // Still Accepting!

Anonymous asked : 🥃 Habit, here's a hypothetical question for you. If your Habitat started to go way downhill, but wasn't a lost cause yet, and you had to resort to more extreme and harmful measures to keep your Habiticians in line, what wouldn't you do?

At once, almost on instinct, Habit feels his breath hitch. Was it possible for air to get caught in somebody’s chest? Well, the question hadn’t even been fully processed before everything decided to lock up, on him. 

‘Why was that?’, he wondered briefly. Uselessly. In fact, he wasn’t even sure WHY he’d bothered to let himself pull the wool over his own eyes; if even for only a second. He KNEW exactly why his hands balled up into fists, exactly why dread was solidifying in his stomach. 

And yet... he had to glance away, towards the balcony. It was just natural, really, whenever anybody mentioned the Habiticians while he happened to be in his office. 

Or. Well. 

‘His’ Habiticians, as they had so eloquently put it. 

The thought made him laugh. He forced himself to hate that fact.

Keeping the smile held tightly on his face, out of a necessity that he hadn’t even realized WAS a necessity, he took a moment to steel himself before walking over to where his line of sight drew him. 

His heels clicked along the floor- an unwelcome change to the encompassing silence from just moments before.

--- “Hmmmmm.... You kno... That”s a “Good” question! Where 2 start with that...” 

Content warning: Brief suicidal ideation, blood, and mentions of murder/corpses under the cut.

Heights had never been a problem for him. He never even really considered them enough for them to BECOME any sort of issue. While he could understand where the fear came from, for some people, so long as he knew the ground he stood on was relatively sturdy, he could be as high as the clouds and not have any cares in the world. 

... Which is why he was confused when he came to a brief pause as he neared the balcony’s edge. Something about the location had begun to set him off, lately.. 

Perhaps it was the finality that such a fall would be responsible for. To say that he’d never considered jumping would be a lie, but- 

He was quick to shake his head- push those thoughts away. Those were for another life. Not this one. 

Habit “easily” (why couldn’t it be easy?) settled himself on the railing, eyes trailing down to the fairground below. 

--- “What WOULDN”T I do, u said..?” 

Maybe he’s stalling, maybe he’s not. You have no proof, as far as he’s concerned. 

--- “Well...” He leans down further, practically resting his head on the cold metal. Although his attention darts around as he observes the day’s activity, he registers next to none of it. 

--- “I suppose I wouldn’t wamnt them 2 think I”m trying two hard. Peeple tend to “Talk”, U see. Nothing like barb-ed wire or anythign sillie like That. The Habi-Tat is notn’t a Prison.” 

Isn’t it? 

--- “Perhapbs the “Curfew” wuld need to be much earlier..? I woould need to be patrolling more oftn than usual, that is 4 certain. Surve-a-lance would be “Upped”, also, of cuorse, but I thimnk I wouldn”t need to be TOO mean...” 

--- “Even if the Habiticians TRIED to eskape, th Carlas would handel everything!” 

Right. The machines he’d created to do his dirty work for him, because Heaven knows that if he had to be the one to subdue fleeing Habiticians, he wouldn’t stand much of a chance. 

And not because he worried that he wouldn’t be strong enough! Really, if THAT was the only concern, he needed to only let himself forget just where he was putting his hands, and, well- 

No. He disliked having to use brute force- especially when it wasn’t absolutely necessary. Call him what you’d like. He can guarantee that none of it would be too far off the mark. 

What the Carlas lacked in speed and intelligence, they made up for in numbers. The ones always actively present on the grounds were FAR from the only ones in The Habitat. 

Even though this situation was only hypothetical, Habit felt himself smirk, nonetheless; oddly proud of his own genius and security. Normally any talk of unrest among his “guests” sent him into a panic. He just simply would not have it! 

Not in HIS domain. HIS creation. If something isn’t working, then!!! He’ll FIX it, and move on!! 

But... ah... He had yet to really adequately answer the question at hand... Right..? 

--- “..... I”m...” 

Something felt- unfinished, here. Did he have more to truly SAY on the matter? 

The sounds of Martha were louder than he remembered. He rationalized the reason behind that being his close proximity to her, as anybody would. 

It just didn’t make them any less overwhelming, at the moment. 

--- “I... don’t think violence is.. nece-ssary.. to maintain the “Peace”, I mean. The way that Im running things right now is good. Yes??” 

Habit allows a brief lull to enter the “conversation”- just out of politeness. When no answer comes to his question, he can’t but to feel foolishly disheartened. 

Only a little bit, though. Just a teeny tiny bit. 

--- “I know this is only a “what if”- I get that. But the question is ridic-u-lous, 2 begin with!1!! Absurd!!!11! This groo-some scenariio will NEVER come two be!! So!!!! Why WORRIE about it!!!!” 

And that’s where he INTENDED to quit talking. Honestly, he did. With every second that passed, he could feel the dam begin to break. 

No, the topic itself didn’t bring him ANXIETY, per-say.... 

... but he WASN’T letting his thoughts lead to their obvious conclusion. That was the missing puzzle piece. That was the reason behind his sweaty palms and urge to be sick. 

Habit was good at blocking out all of the unpleasant things about life. Sure, they almost always inevitably resurfaced, anyway, but the goal was never to be rid of them for good. 

Merely to stall. Always to stall. 

But that’s NOT what he’s doing, right now! Because there IS nothing more to discuss!! Nothing! Nada! Zilch! 

--- “...” 

He hadn’t noticed how tight his grip on the railing had gotten- had barely registered the tension in his shoulders as he leaned further. Further... JUST so he could look down, better. That’s all. 

The daily lives of the Habiticians meant little to nothing to him. He was able to seamlessly gloss over Punching Girl as she pretended to, predictably, fight something. Or someone. He completely ignored Broccoli Child- nearly rolling his eyes at a less than pleasant memory regarding the trash he once tried to sell to him. 

Nearly.

He hurried to turn away, to head back inside. He knew that if he lingered for any longer that the incessant WHINING of a certain resident would start back up, again. Perhaps it already had and he’d merely gotten beyond used to it. 

Great. Cool. Love that.

--- “I THINK yuo are under-estimnating the work I”ve put into Thee Habitat. I know verie well how 2 control MY Habiticians, and if push comes two shove, I”m SURE I could-” 

--- “........ I... could........ .................. ah...” 

Something about his wording froze him in his tracks. He would’ve clamped his jaw shut if he had the gall to; would have bitten his tongue just to keep any more comments on the matter to himself. 

The smile from before never once left his face. He disliked how heavy it felt- disliked the fact that he apparently felt the need to keep falling back into the hole he was so DESPERATELY trying to clamber back out of. 

He’d said all he needed to say. He’d done his part! 

Habit lowers his head, back turned to the outside world. A chill seeping into the room reminded him that he’d forgotten to close the door. He normally wouldn’t care about such a minute detail, but- 

One quick glance towards the “operating room” is all he needs to change his mind. It’s bad ENOUGH that he’s allowing himself to become so overly fixated on everything that could go WRONG, and not go RIGHT!! Nobody else needs to accidentally overhear something they shouldn’t. 

Hand shaking (shaking??), he pulls it away from the glass; job done, and steps unsteady as he attempts to backtrack. Literally. 

Habit whirls back around, action abrupt as he gradually loses his initial train of thought. His breaths are a bit labored, like he’d just been running, somehow, and he wants to fix that. He wants, more than anything, to fix this entire situation. 

Pathetic. One simple hypothetical had sent him into such a state?? Disgusting. 

If he couldn’t handle the fire, then he shouldn’t have walked directly into the flames. He had what it took to run The Habitat. He took every precaution necessary. 

‘If your Habitat started to go way downhill, but wasn't a lost cause yet, and you had to resort to more extreme and harmful measures to keep your Habiticians in line, what wouldn't you do?’ 

‘What WOULDN’T he do?’ 

--- “. . . If. . . push comes to SHOVE. . .” 

He changes trajectory. Wandering around aimlessly certainly wouldn’t help anything, and suddenly, he feels very much so like cleaning something is in order. How often did he do that, anyway? 

Not often enough, he decided, eyeing the grotesque red splotches.... just about everywhere he thought to look. On the chair, some on the floor-

HOW did he manage to get blood on the walls??? 

Habit reaches forward to grab the nearby mirror on the tray, having already pulled a cloth from one of his pockets. Yes, a cleaning day was definitely in order. A dirty workplace leads to a dirty outlook on life. 

No wonder he’s so stressed. 

--- “... Well,” he shrugs, “who is 2 say that there will bee any Habiticians TO keep in line?” 

As soon as the words leave his mouth, he doesn’t find any relief in them, whatsoever. So he continues. 

--- “Let me elab-or-ate. CORPSES have teeth. Right?” 

He turns his head, then; absently searching for the spray bottle he swore he had sitting on the counter. 

--- “Who cares if “The Big Event” is SKIPPED, all-2-gether? I would not be above that. No “waitiing” and no “gettiing their hopes up” 4 something that was falsely advertized.” 

--- “So,” ah, there it is, “to answer you”r question:” 

--- “Nothing!11!!! There are absolootely NO lengths that I womn”t go in order 2 enshure that I gather More Teeth!!1!! So WHAT if I need to “take out thee trash” all at once?? So WHAT if I “accidentally” get the dosage wrong? They will bee happily and giggily, and then....” 

--- “......... they will not.”

“Sick” doesn’t even begin to cover how he feels, right about now. Does he sound casual while discussing this? How is he coming off as while he so flippantly talks about murder? 

Cowardly? Psychopathic? ... Terrifying? 

Is he terrifying? He must be. There’s no other explanation, in his mind. 

--- “No skin off MY back!! At leest CORPSES do not cry!!” 

Habit twirls back around to the counter where he’d grabbed the spray bottle, content smile betraying him as he gently sets it back where he found it. 

--- “At leest CORPSES do not struggle!! When they FIN-A-LLY stop moviing, they cann”t tell me: “Yuou womn”t get awaY with THis!!!1!”. They can’t skream and run- they can”t do any-thing At All!1!!!” 

And that’s the beauty of it. Or, at least, it SHOULD be. 

--- “Once they set “Foot” into The Habitat, it isn”t like theyre Going 2 bee LEAVINGG it, anyway!! I”mmn not beeing CRUEL!!! What I do- it’s BRILL-I-ANT!! So WHY should I feel BAD??!?!?!” 

Why, indeed?? Yes, WHY should he feel bad about cracking a few chickens to make a brand new healthy egg? What is the harm in it? 

Nonexistent, as far as HE can tell! 

--- “Thee answer is: I shouldn”t, annd I don’t! I hope thiss conversatioon was en-lit-ening 4 U! :-)” 

So... there. He’s done. It’s over. Rant over. He- He’s said his share. Had his fill. 

Of course, NOW he’s gone and gotten himself all riled up. Who knows how long it’ll take him to calm back down? Once he allows that little box in the back of his mind to open, this always happens. 

Why do you think he’s so keen on keeping it nice and SHUT? 

Autopilot becomes comforting after the hundredth time you shift into it. Habit continues about his business, cleaning the operating room while humming a jovial tune to himself. 

The fact that he stumbles in his steps every now and then is unimportant. His pounding heart barely matters. 

So long as he’s smiling, it’s IMPOSSIBLE to be upset! 

Maybe if he believes that hard enough, it’ll be true. 

[dark0angel13]

LYHC: Chapter Six

The door opens silently and Natsu lets out the breath he’s been holding, thanking God that Happy’s door didn’t make any sound. It’s late and the last thing he wants to do is wake up the old man. He walks with quiet purpose, closing the door softly before removing his shoes and tip toeing to set his bag on the table. He didn’t have much, just what he took with him when he left the hospital.  

“You don’t have to worry about waking me up.” His voice cuts through the darkness and Natsu nearly jumps out of his skin.  

“Jesus Christ Happy you scared the shit out of me! Why are you sitting in the dark anyway?”  

“Would it make a difference if I had the light on?”  

Shit, he’s got a point.

“Yes!” He counters exasperated, “Because then I would know you’re awake and you wouldn’t have scared ten years off my damn life!”

The old man laughs and Natsu growls lightly before walking up and sitting across from him.  

“What were you doing sitting all alone out here anyway?” Natsu asks curious.  

“I was waiting for you.” Happy smiles and motions to the fridge, “I thawed some more blood out if you wanted to top off. Few minutes in the microwave should be enough.”  

“You really know what you’re doing,” Natsu laughs, “I’m not your first vampire?”  

“Oh no,” Happy’s chuckle has the hairs on the back of his neck standing up, “there have been a few before you.”  

The room is silent while Natsu heats up the blood, cringing only slightly at the stale taste when he gulps it down.  

“It’s not as good as the fresh stuff but this will keep you fed until you can find another source.”  

Natsu nods absently at the old man before remembering he’s blind and verbalizes his thanks. For a blind man, Happy saw a surprising amount, and it scared him.  

“Hey,” Natsu stops and looks at a photo on the bookshelf by the window. It didn’t seem to be that old but the frame is what caught his eye. Old ironwork on the sides with stained wood for top and bottom. It was beautiful and it drew Natsu right in. “Who are these people?”  

There were three, all young and smiling, and all with startling white hair. It makes him think of Mira and he smiles. One of them even looks like her…

“Ah the Strauss siblings. Closest I ever got to actual kids if I had to reckon.” Happy saunters up and grabs the photo, a nostalgic smile on his face. “The youngest, Lisanna was her name, she was just like you.”  

Natsu feels himself stiffen as he stares at her picture. Bright sapphire eyes and an infectious smile. She seemed so happy.  

“Like me? You mean she…you know…?” He can’t bring himself to say it for some reason. If he said it out loud it would solidify the fact that this was indeed a thing.  

“A vampire? Yeah. Sweetest thing too.”  

“What happened to her?” he follows Happy to the couch, noticing how the old man is gripping to portrait like his life depends on it. There is a long silence before he speaks and Natsu isn’t sure he wants to know any more. The despair that he hears in the sigh has his heart clenching.

“She didn’t want to hurt people anymore...” Natsu hears nothing but utter defeat in his voice, “And the frozen blood only helps so much. After a while, her body just gave up.”  

“How did she become a vampire in the first place?”

“Where to begin...” a simple response that carries so much weight. “She was diagnosed with Leukemia at a young age.”

“Leukemia is a form of cancer isn’t it?”

“Yeah, “Happy nods, “She was diagnosed when she was seven if I remember correctly. The treatments were hard on her body and she turned around fourteen. I found her rummaging through the garbage one night and took her in.”

“I know the feeling...” Natsu nods in agreement.

“She couldn’t take the guilt of killing to stay alive, and eventually decided to stop feeding all together. She passed a couple of years ago.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.” What else can he say to something like that? “what happened to the other two in the photo?”

“They tried to talk her out of it, but her mind was made up.” Happy wipes away a tear while he speaks, “Her brother, Elfman, up and joined the Army. Said he needed to feel useful. Her sister went back to school to become a nurse. She still visits every so often, “he pauses for a moment, “She still comes by monthly to say hi, in fact she should be here any moment.”

“Is it okay for me to be here? Should I hide?” He doesn’t really know why he’s asking, but in the books  he’s read, vampires had to hide from normal people. This is no different right?

“It’s not like you have fangs or burst into flames in sunlight, far as I’m concerned, you’re a normal person.”

“Okay then.” Really, what else can he say?  

As if on cue there is a knock at the door before it opens and Natsu feels his body go stiff.  

“Sorry I’m late Happy, work was a bitch today.” The voice is light and Natsu hears a familiarity in it immediately. There’s no way it’s her...there’s no fucking way the world is that small.

She looks up and their eyes meet, the entire world melting away. In that moment, it’s just them and he feels tears well in his eyes.

“Nat...su...?” her voice is laced with shock and the sound of his name is like the dam breaking on the tears in his eyes. It’s really her. She’s here, standing in front of him.  

“Mira...” His body doesn’t want to move. His feet seem to be rooted in place where he stands and no matter what he tells himself, he has no control over his movements and it’s infuriating.  There is a moment of silence for what seems like an eternity before she’s racing towards him.

“Natsu!” He’s wrapped in her arms in seconds and her warmth covers him like a security blanket. He’s melting into her embrace before he takes a breath, his arms encircling her waist and his face buried in her chest while he cries.

“I thought I lost you...” she rubs his back and suddenly he’s back in the hospital again, her comforting him like it was just another day.

“You two know each other?” Happy’s question breaks the moment and they separate but not before she places a gentle kiss on his forehead and smiles.

“I was the nurse who took care of him before he went to Hospice.” She wipes her tears and ruffles his hair.

“Small world.” He chuckles, placing the picture back. “Help yourself, my home is your home.”  

“Thanks Happy,” Mira grabs a two glasses and the bottle of whiskey before sitting down across from him and motioning for Natsu to get comfortable next to her. “We’ve got a lot of catching up to do.”  

“I still can’t believe I’m seeing you again,” his voice is soft as he sits, his hand coming to grip a lock of her hair and he feels tears begin to well again.  

She leans into his touch and her warmth makes his heart race. He loved her the most during his stay at the hospital. She treated him like they were family; loved him like he was her brother.  

“I know the feeling,” she takes a long drink and leans back. “When I watched the van drive away, I collapsed. You were the closest thing to family I had there. It broke my heart to see you leave and I’ve prayed for your peaceful passing every day.”  

He watches a tear fall and his hand tightens on the glass of blood. He wants to erase her pain.  

“When I heard what happened on the news later that night I had to leave work early. I was a mess. The video of the abandoned van still makes me cringe just thinking about it. There was so much blood. And the dead driver…” Mira trails off as her voice begins to tremble and Natsu remembers it all like it was yesterday.  

“I’m not sure what happened,” he begins, picking up where she left off. “We stopped for gas and everything just changed. I could smell the blood, see it running through his veins. My vision went red and I just… lost control.” How else could he describe it? There was no easy way of explaining how he turned into a murdering psycho in the span of five minutes.  

“When I finally came to my senses he was dead and—for a reasons that still confuse me to this day— I didn’t feel sick anymore. My hair had grown back, I felt stronger; I felt… alive.”  

“They looked for you for days, fearing whatever had killed the driver, had taken you. When they gave up a week later; Erza had rushed home on emergency leave to attend your funeral. It was a closed casket for obvious reasons but…” Mira is crying now as she speaks, her hand coming to rest on Natsu’s.  

“I never want to see that much pain in her eyes again Natsu… she was heart broken.”  

“How do you even know Erza? She only visited a few times and it was all after you had gone home for the day.” If he remembers right, they only met once, right before she left for her most recent tour.  

“Elfman joined the army remember?” She clarifies and it begins to make sense to him. “He’s currently deployed overseas with her team as the medic. I get letters from him weekly and recently, Erza has been writing too. They’ve become close over there. The team is like a tight knit family, but I guess when you live in stress inducing environments like that, it’s necessary to find a coping mechanism for it.”  

“I see,” he’s happy that she isn’t alone anymore; that she has people she can trust and confide in. He misses her so much it hurts. “How is she doing?”  

“She misses you.” Mira says matter of fact, pulling a letter from her purse, “this is the first letter I ever got from her. I keep it on me at all times and read it almost every day. She’s become like a sister to me in the past few months, and every time I read this letter, It shows me how strong of a woman she is, and how much stronger she will become. You are a lucky man Natsu, to have someone who loves you so much.”  

He takes the letter and finishes his drink with shaky hands before his eyes settle on the words written before him.  

Mira,

I know this is out of the blue, and that you don’t know who I am, but I’m deployed with your younger brother Elfman. First, let me just say that his name makes me laugh every time I speak to him because your parents must have been high as fuck when they named him. He’s a good soldier though, always first to jump in and help, and he’s saved us a few times out here.  

He said that if I needed someone to write to… that I could write to you, and that you would write back. I’m not sure if you will, or if you’ll even want to because you don’t even know who I am. I think we only met once when I went to visit Natsu in the hospital. He really loved you Mira, I could see it in his eyes when he would talk about you. You took care of him when I couldn’t… so I wanted to thank you for that.  

These past few weeks have been the hardest of my life. I find myself writing to him out of habit, then I remember he’s not around to read them anymore and I burst into tears. It’s like my heart was ripped out my chest and no matter how hard I try to find it, I can’t. I’m just going with the motions here, like clock work. I wake up, do my job, eat, and go to bed. I clean my guns way too often for sanity and I feel like my team is afraid of me, like I’m a hair trigger away from losing my god damned mind over here.  

I see him sometimes… when we patrol. His smile on the face of a child here when they offer us food, his laugh when I watch the kids play soccer with no shoes on. His eyes as a brother protects his sister from a wild dog and I’m too far away to act in time. He’s everywhere and I’ve realized something recently… he may be gone, but he lives on in my heart.  

I miss him so much it hurts. I keep a picture of him in my wallet when the nights get lonely, and look at it when I need to remind myself why I’m a soldier. I joined for him, because he got diagnosed before he could enlist and it broke his heart that he couldn’t be the hero he wanted to be. But he’s my hero…he’s my hero because I can’t be his hero anymore. Not when there’s no one to go back to. He won’t be waiting for me when I get home. He won’t be sitting there with bated breath to hear about all the shit I deal with on a daily basis over here.  

He always loved my stories, and I loved telling him. He was the only one who was genuinely interested in what I did. It made me proud that I could live the life he wanted for himself. That I could be a hero for him. I wish so badly that he was here with me now, by my side because I know with every fiber of my being, that he would have made an amazing soldier.  

I cry every night when I go to bed because I wasn’t there for him. That I couldn’t be there when the accident happened, when he was taken only God knows where by God knows what, and I hate myself for it every day. He didn’t deserve to die like that, and part of me, even if it’s just a sliver, hopes he’s still alive out there somewhere. That he makes his way back to you Mira because you’re the sister he should have had…not me. I couldn’t be there for him like you were. So thank you for always loving him when I wasn’t able to. Thank you for taking care of him in my place. Thank you for everything you did for him.  

I suppose I should wrap this up, we’ve got a long mission tomorrow and I haven’t slept properly in days. I hope this letter makes it to you Mira, because I need someone now more than ever. I miss Natsu so fucking much I want to kill myself some days just so I can see him again. I won’t of course, because I’m needed here and I know that if I did that I’d never see him. His heart was pure, his soul went to heaven. Maybe some day I’ll see him again… maybe some day I’ll be able to face him and tell him how sorry I am and how much I love him.  

Thank you listening to me rant, it means a lot and even if you don’t write back… would it be okay if I kept writing to you? I hope work is going well and if you need to vent to anyone other than your brother, well you know where to find me.  

Erza.  

Natsu can’t breathe. He can barely see the paper in his hands through the tears welling in his eyes. He left her all alone, with no one to talk to. How could he live with himself?  

“She needed me… and I wasn’t there for her.” He chokes out and he feels Mira wrap her arms around him.  

“No honey, you were there for her. Even if not in person, your memory is what keeps her going.” Her words are soft in his ear but he can’t believe them.  

“Her pain…” He buries his head in his hands and a sob rocks his body.  

“She misses you so much Natsu.” Yeah, he can see that. In the words written in the letter, in the lifeless smile she puts on with her team. He stares at her form in the picture that she sent with the letter and his heart aches. She’s lost weight, looks so tired and her eyes don’t shine like they used to. It’s his fault.  

“I miss her too Mira. I miss her so much it hurts.” He turns to her and wraps his arms around her, holding on like his life depends on her for support. She’s warm against him, her heart beating strong in her chest and he listens to it like a mantra that echoes through his head.  

“Can I see her again? Her tour should be ending in the next few months right?”  

“That may not be the best idea kid,” Happy speaks for the first time in a while. “Burying a family member is very traumatic, especially when they weren’t there at the time of death. Seeing her now would only confuse her and possibly send her past her breaking point, and I don’t think you want to be responsible for that.”  

He’s got a point, Natsu knows this, but he wants to see her again. He wants to hold her, to feel her in his arms if only one last time.  

“Trust me kid,” Happy’s hand comes to rest on his shoulder. “Not all siblings can handle the truth when it comes to people like you. Mira and Elfman are a special case-“

“Maybe Erza will be too,” Natsu interjects quickly, grasping at straws, at anything he can find for purchase to give him a reason to see her again. “She’s the strongest person I know, if anyone can handle me being a vampire, it’s Erza. I’m sure of it.”  

“For her sake Natsu, I hope your right.” Happy concedes and stands, “it’s late and these old bones need rest. Mira, as always your welcome to stay the night here.”  

“Thank you Happy.” She replies, “I think I’ll take you up on that offer tonight.”  

“You can sleep with me, it’s my first time sleeping in a bed in months.” Natsu is on his feet in seconds, pulling her with him to follow the old man to his new room. It’s small, but it’s all he needs, and it has its own bathroom.  

“Wait here while I get cleaned up and we can snuggle like we used to in the hospital before your shift would end.” His eyes light up when she nods in return and he’s gone seconds later.  

For the first time in what feels like forever, he feels normal again. The water was hot against his skin, instead of freezing and unclean. The food in his stomach was warm and cooked and definitely not from a dumpster. The body next to him was real and warm and so damn satisfying that he starts crying again when his arms wrap around Mira.  

“Everything okay Natsu?” Her voice is filled with worry but he shakes his head.  

“Everything is perfect. I just missed this.” He squeezes her tighter and that’s that last thing he remembers before sleep takes him.  

END

Chapter 6 is up, sorry it took  so long, so many other fics I’m working on right now it’s hard to keep track of them all. I do hope you all enjoy this chapter though! 

[only-ever-asked-questions]

What a Rush

fanfiction?? hello?

Collaborative effort done just this morning from me and @robanilla go give her some love please.

Summary: Aziraphale and Crowley finally confess. Words: 1,103 Ship: Ineffable Husbands TW/CW: kissing, bit of misunderstandings but it works out Let me know if I should add more

--

"I love you." Aziraphale's voice was soft, timid. Like if he said it any louder, Crowley would blow away. Crowley froze, the comfortable silence before the other spoke turning into a tense one.

I love you too, so so much. I've loved you since I saw you on Eden's gate, I've loved you since you introduced me to oysters in Rome, I've loved you since the day you opened your bookshop, and on and on Crowley's thoughts rambled.

Aziraphale was stiff in anticipation. After six thousand years he finally built up the guts. He swallowed as he waited for Crowley's answer, practically hearing gears turning in the demon's head.

"About time, don't you think?" Crowley choked out eventually, voice tight and hesitant to release the emotion he's controlled for so long.

Aziraphale's body finally relaxed and he let out a small chuckle. What a very Crowley answer. 

"I suppose it is."

Crowley, however, wasn't calming down. He loves you, he said it out loud, he loves you, he said LOVE, he loves me. Crowley was only barely containing his excited panic, and his hands began to twitch with the urge to move closer to his angel.

Aziraphale was unsure what to do now. He confessed his love, Crowley reciprocated... Oh, those human films made it seem much easier. Should they kiss? He always secretly wanted to know what that felt like. He was brought out of his thoughts when he caught Crowley's hands twitching. 

"Are you okay, dear?"

"Fine, angel. Very. Yessss I am fffiine." Crowley was, in fact, Not Fine. Aziraphale scooted closer to the demon, slowly placing a hand over the other's.

Inwardly, Crowley felt his heart pop, completely giving up, while his lungs burst into flames, the smoke coming out of his ears and the heat flushing his skin. Outwardly, if Aziraphale was looking at him, he would see the tips of his ears to the base of his neck tinging pink, and his lips squishing together into a barely contained smile.

"Six thousand years..." Crowley murmured, an unmistakable quiver in his voice. Aziraphale noticed the blush across the demon, it was a rather nice look on him. It was short lived, though.

Crowley’s internal reaction made him flinch violently. Aziraphale pulled away like he'd touched something hot, a hurt look in his eyes. Crowley immediately regretted such a movement.

"Agh! Sorry! Angel. I... I'm sorry," Crowley impulsively took the angel's hand, previously on his own, in both hands, cupping them gently. "Didn't... didn't expect you to go so fast." He looked up at the other, a broken tease, but he tried.

‘You go too fast for me, Crowley.’

Aziraphale looked at him owlishly, not quite understanding what he was seeing. Crowley near melted under his intense gaze, so he looked away and forced himself to explain. "Please, don't... don't let go, angel. I just, need a minute, see? I've loved you for so long without expecting you to-" he cut himself off.

He was trembling and Aziraphale felt every nerve of it. Crowley’s hands were a comfortable warmth clasped around his own despite it. "How long...? How long, Crowley?" He asked. He leaned forward to get closer. There was a fumbling of words from the demon, and then a mutter Aziraphale couldn't hear.

"What?"

"I said," Crowley took a breath, feeling the dam holding back his emotions crack and crumble, "I said that I don't know- like, exactly when I fell in love with you, but- er, agh!" Crowley was trembling, and he grins excitedly, his sunglasses slipping down. "I've loved you for as long as I can remember, and I remember a whole lot, angel."

Golden snake eyes met Aziraphale's contrasting blue ones as Crowley's glasses slid down his nose. The angel couldn't help but return the grin, perhaps could even feel a tear or two coming up. "That's... that is a long time," Aziraphale said. "In Rome...?" He questioned. A nod. "The Globe?" Another nod. The angel took an unnecessary, but shaky breath.

A thought made Crowley pause. "Oh, Aziraphale..," he breathed, his voice holding a tremor as he realized that he should have thought this through. The reason why Aziraphale hadn't said anything, why he even explicitly tried to believe the opposite, why he sounded so terrifyingly hopeful when we said "maybe one day we could have a picnic". Crowley searched his expression, and despite the smile at the corners of his lips, his pale blue eyes are glossy. "You... do you believe me?"

There was a tight silence as Crowley's question rang around the room. Aziraphale put his other hand over Crowley's, still keeping his head up to meet the demon's eyes. He blinked out a few small tears at the corners of his eyes. "Y-yes... Yes I believe you." And how could he not?

Oh, but how could he? Crowley's brow creased in thought, wondering just how he could solidify that belief in him. He worried his bottom lip for a second too long, and Aziraphale noticed.

Aziraphale gazed at Crowley's lips, the way they scrunched together. 

"Crowley?"

"Angel?"

He leaned forward, awkwardly pushing Crowley's sunglasses above his nose as he connected their lips in a kiss. Crowley's eyes widened and Aziraphale's closed.

Crowley held stock still for the moment, waiting, just dreading when he wakes up from this dream. Aziraphale then pulls away, looks up and sighs. He pats Crowley's cheek. "Well, come now my dear boy, you're not really going to make me do all the work from now on, are you?"

Crowley snaps. The dam collapses. He resolves, then and there, no more hiding.

And he surges forward and kisses him again.

This is it. This  is how Crowley can cement that love in him. So he pours his heart, soul, and very being into the kiss, his hands coming up to tangle in Azirapahale's beautiful curls. Like the Bentley, Crowley got from 0 to 90 in seconds, and Aziraphale, his heart akin to Central London, did nothing to stop him.

Aziraphale gasped, forgetting that he didn't need to breathe, and Crowley takes the opportunity to deepen the kiss. Aziraphale feels dizzy, and grabs onto the lapels of Crowley's jacket to ground himself. Yes, they both think, Yes, this is real!

When they eventually separate, they see the other flushed and smiling. They were drunk on each other, to put it cliché.

"I love you," Crowley blurted out.

"I love you too." 

Crowley had lowered his hands around Aziraphale's neck, and it felt absolutely amazing. The pair's lips were flushed as they stared at each other in awe. What a rush.

[elmomachete]

Wrestlemania XXXV Predictions.

Yeah, yeah, they don’t use the Roman numerals anymore. They don’t even use regular numerals. Humor me, it’s out of habit. I actually watched most of NXT Takeover last night, mostly live. I’m still not entirely sold on Blackochet or Matt Riddle, but the War Raiders and Velveteen Dream are the tittyballs and so were both matches. I fell asleep during the UK Championship match and intended to finish the show this morning, but then the results were spoiled for me by Cageside Seats in article headlines. Weak sauce, gentlemen. The weakest of sauces. Oh well, I’ll finish the show eventually. Anyway, with a 42 match card, the pre-show is liable to start any minute now so I better get these predictions up before all the poor souls in New Jersey (I’m sorry, I meant “New York”) start freezing their asses off. Let’s get prognosticating, shall we? Fabulous Moolah Memorial Women’s Battle Royale Totally not promoting human trafficking since 2018. Who won last year, Naomi? It’ll be tough to live up to those standards. I’ll go with Lacey Evans as the winner, because I’m sure that makes sense as a payoff to her coming out, doing nothing, turning around and walking to the back in Crazy Uncle Vinny’s mind. It’d be nice to give Asuka something after her seemingly random dethroning, but Lacey seems more predictably random. Cruiserweight Championship: Tony Nese vs. Buddy Murphy (c.) 205 Dead Crowd. I watched the Cruiserweight match from the Rumble pre-show the other day, and Buddy Murphy seems like a pretty good wrestleperson. Let’s say he retains, because he’s marrying Alexa Bliss and the company still loves her even though she’ll probably never wrestle again. Andre Roussimoff Memorial Battle Royale (ARMBaR) Just look what it did for Mojo Rawley! How can they make up for having Braun Strowman win the tag titles with a ten year old last year? Have him feud with two schmucks from Saturday Night Live so WWE can end up on a legitimate sports program the next morning! So either he wins, or after he eliminates the aforementioned schmucks he eliminates himself and chases them to the back leaving it open for (randomly points at list of entrants with eyes closed) Curtis Axel to win. Side thought: I think next year they should bring back Nicholas and rehire Matt Striker, putting them against the Bar, the Usos and the New Day. Striker can tutor the kid on the road, and putting them over the entire division will really solidify Nicholas’ legacy as an undefeated two-time tag team champion. Raw Tag Team Championships: Zack Ryder and Curt Hawkins vs. the Revival (c.) The Battle of the WWE Random Name Generator Recipients! ...good lord, they’re actually giving the Edgeheads a Mania match? For the titles? I know the belts don’t matter and that maybe a dozen people give a rat’s ass about both teams combined, but still - Ryder and Hawkins’ whole shtick is that they never win. That ALWAYS gets over. So obviously they have to win here to get their “Wrestlemania Moment,” in their “home state” of “New York.” Smackdown Tag Team Championships: Nakamusev vs. the Bar vs. Blackochet vs. the Usos (c.) Aren’t I so witty with my portmanteau tag team names? I’m glad Wikipedia exists to not only tell me all 107 matches, but to remind me that yes, the Usos are tag champs again. What with them losing in Brooklyn, I expect Black and Ricochet to win the titles to start off their big show (no, not that one) debut with a bang and to finally tie them to Smackdown instead of Raw. they’ll have better matches on that show anyway. Or the Usos retain because they’re related to the Rock, who cares. Shane McMahon vs. the Miz Because Super Shane needs to get his annual hyperventilating stunt show in. God bless the Miz, he may be the best company man since John Cena for doing whatever stupid shit they come up with for him. Case in point: this fucking match. Does anyone besides Shane or Vince give two shits about this? Logic says the Miz wins because he’s (somehow) the babyface, so I’ll say Shane wins and the Miz’s dad hugs him afterwards because even though his son main evented Wrestlemania and defeated John Cena (there he is again) and got married to a smokin’ hot model and had a kid, NOW he’s finally proud of him because he put up a valiant effort against the 50 year old son of the owner of the company. Women’s Tag Team Championships: the IIconics vs. Nia Jax and Tamina vs. Beth Phoenix and Natalya vs. the Boss n’ Hug Connection (c.) Who’s got the worse name, the Australians or the champions? I guess Trish and Lita said no, so they dusted Beth Phoenix off and pretend she’s important enough to justify her Hall of Fame induction. Nia and Tamina suck, Billie and Peyton don’t matter, Beth won’t be around the next day and I can’t see them changing the titles so soon after creating them. Bayley and Sasha retain. Kurt Angle vs. Baron Corbin John Cena Oh, shut up. You know it’s going to happen. Cena beats up Corbin on the way to the ring, spouts some jargon about hustling respect loyally, he drags Angle through three minutes of suck hoping he doesn’t accidentally kill him, somebody wins and they both go away. (Flips a coin) Cena wins, LOL. AJ Styles vs. Randy Orton Fighting because reasons! Um... let’s say AJ wins, because Orton is a made man and they wanna thank AJ for not leaving for All Elite Wrestling (what a terrible name). Christ, how many pointless matches could they trim to make this a show of reasonable length? Not everybody needs a Wrestlemania payday... do those even exist anymore with the Network? United States Championship: Rey Mysterio vs. Samoa Joe (c.) I’ve got nothing sarcastic to say about this match, I’m actually looking forward to it somewhat. Rey Mysterio can still go, and although people say Joe has lost a step since coming to WWE I’m actually a bigger fan of him now than ever. I think he’s benefited a lot from having to tone it down and only do two or three big spots in matches as opposed to a billion, although whether that’s due to the restrictions of the “WWE Style” or age/injuries is up for debate (I felt the same about Cesaro slowing it down going from Ring of Honor to WWE). Rey can survive a loss here and I think they wanna get as much out of Joe while they still can, so he retains. WWE Championship: Kofi Kingston vs. the New Daniel Bryan (c.) Remember when the “World” title wasn’t likely to be in the middle of the show? As much as I’d hate to see the Hempyweight Championship belt go (and no matter what it’ll eventually have to), I think the crowd would riot if Kofi didn’t win. So I reckon Kofi wins, then Big E. and Xavier turn on him right afterwards to piss the crowd off right after throwing them a bone. Y’know what? I think it would be interesting to see a riot at a wrestling show. Fans have threatened it with signs ever since Cena vs. Van Dam, but we’ve never actually seen one. It’d certainly be a “Wrestlemania Moment.” Roman Reigns vs. Drew McIntyre Yay, Roman’s back! And he’s not in the main event again! Yet! I’m as glad as anyone that Reigns seems to have beaten leukemia, but the entire feud with Drew seems like something they threw together at the last minute because they didn’t expect him to come back so soon. I can never tell if they’re behind Drew or not, they seem to change their minds every other week. Roman wins, obviously, then probably goes right back into the Universal title picture. Triple H vs. Batista The epic final battle between Drax the Destroyer and whatever Triple H’s character was called in Blade 3. I’m interested in this match due to sheer sideshow curiosity. Big Dave hasn’t wrestled in however long, and last time Hunter wrestled he ripped a titty off his chest in the beginning of the match. I have enough faith that’ll it be something watchable at least, Triple H’s match with Angle and Rousey was good last year. Batista wins and rides off into the sunset, and Trips “retires” for about a year. Let’s give it a year and a half if we’re being generous. Universal Championship: Seth Rollins vs. Brock Lesnar (c.) Prediction for number of German suplexes: 11. Now this one is a sticky wicket. On the one hand, it’d be nice to have the Rumble winner, y’know, win, and have someone with the belt who’ll be around every week. On the other hand, I’m sure Vince is already salivating over the thought of Roman conquering the unstoppable once every four months onslaught of Brock Lesnar. On the THIRD hand, they did make a t-shirt for Rollins that says “Beastslayer” which would be completely pointless to peddle at shows if he lost. I’ll go out on a limb and pick Lesnar, but whoever wins is getting Roman as a challenger  Intercontinental Championship: Finn Balor vs. Bobby Lashley (c.) Can we get this show over with already? I’m already bored just writing about it. The Demon wins back the title that he just lost for no reason a few weeks ago, Lio Rush probably gets beat up and the crowd continues to go mild for Bobby Lashley. Next. Women’s Championship, winner takes all: Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte Flair (c., Smackdown) vs. Ronda Rousey (c., Raw) Becky. Becky, Becky, Becky. Wait, I have to say something other than that about the match? The build for this has been all over the place. Becky taps to Asuka at the Rumble, then takes Lana’s spot to win the Rumble match itself. Becky’s suspended, but she’s on every show anyway. Then she’s not suspended, she and Ronda break the fourth wall on Twitter, Charlotte replaces Becky, then she wins the Smackdown belt from Asuka and it’s a triple threat, and my God I think I’ve gone cross eyed. Who wins will really depend on where they place this match on the card. I know they’ve said it’ll be the “main event,” and if it truly goes on last then they’d be insane not to give it to Becky. I’ve been trying to reasonably predict the order in which the matches will take place. BUT... we all know WWE has been saying double main event, triple main event, whatever for years. If it DOESN’T go on last, it’s probably gonna be Charlotte. She’s already beaten Trish’s record for number of Women’s title reigns, and lord knows WWE wants to make her seem like the best at everything due to her name. I’ll (perhaps foolishly) put all my chips on Becky, but won’t be surprised in the least if it’s Charlotte. Oh yeah, Ronda’s in the match too. How ‘bout that. *whew* So yeah, sixteen matches on what’s liable to be a seven hour show. I’m likely to watch it in spurts, because A) my TV is always at the risk of being hijacked by a six year old, and 2) I’m going to fall asleep if I try to watch it all in one shot. I won’t be drinking, because I’d rather fall asleep due to boredom rather than alcohol consumption this year. I almost don’t want the women’s match to go last, because the crowd will be fucking exhausted by then. Of the sixteen matches, I’m confident about half will be good. So there’s that. We’ll have a couple overblown entrances, some forced “Wrestlemania Moments,” the possibility for an entertaining car wreck or two, maybe an Undertaker appearance. This is the first year though where I’m sort of dreading the Grandest Stage of the Showcase of the Immortally Ultimate Thrill Ride in twenty years of fandom, and that’s pretty disheartening. That Takeover sure was something though, wasn’t it?

[mrpotatobrown]

61. The Moon: Part 4

LAST TIME, ON THE POTATO STORIES:

Mr Potato was living in a city of suitcases in the holding bay of the plane when it got hijacked by one of his oldest friends, turned nemesis, Mr Worm (who was dressed as an old lady). Feared they were being hijacked to crash the plane somewhere Mr Potato and friends tried to hatch a plan to take the plane back BUT they run out of time. They didn’t crash into anything, no, they landed on the moon! Now, at gunpoint and awaiting negations with Earth, a bomb lies dormant in the centre of the Moon. If the deal doesn’t fly, then they do instead, as the Bomb sends moon shards crashing back to Earth...

An old classic urban legend says that the Moon was made of cheese, but if it were it wouldn't be the kind of cheese I’d nosh down on. Rubbish litters its surface from test probes and experiments humans have conducted on this rocky dump for years, making it an assortment of items they never want back. Add us to that pile, as we’re forgotten in our city of suitcases, living in a home that never has a foundation, lost on the sea with no destination.

It’s almost like actually being a piece of cheese really when you think about it. Cheese it seldom ate alone, it’s munched down on crackers, melted down into toasties or sprinkled on your pasta, but sparsely do many people go chowing down on a block of cheese and nothing else. You’re ketchup, a sauce, that someone snatches when their meal isn’t quite right, but it’s the sandwich that gets the credit, not you.

It’s like a person giving feedback on a story you may have written. Yes, you did the meat of the work, but that feedback is what sets your story apart; it’s what made your story great. But Hell, you’re name isn’t going on that script.

We’re the rubbish sent to the moon, forgotten about, but we were all successes in some way, just never remembered. This rubbish littering the Moon’s surface, all being a part of some bigger thing, will be forgotten; but the experiment the humans actually managed to pull off will be remembered. The rubbish is Just like the cheese sprinkled on the pasta dish, and just like us stuck away on this moon.

But as Mr Worm’s trigger finger gets more twitchy and my paper plane messages which were thrown to Earth get no responses, I end up thinking about this crazy scenario and wonder; I’m still the best part of that pasta dish.

Everyone needs cheese and even if people don’t pat my potato-y back and give me a thumbs up, I have to remind myself that I'm wanted too.

I’m Mr ‘God Dam’ Potato and don’t you forget that. I embrace the rubbish, I embrace the cheesy, for I am the cow’s udders, the creme of the creme, and while sometimes I kick myself when I’m down or think what I have to say isn’t worthy of being the Moon in the sky, I need to remind myself: I AM THE MOON IN THE SKY! You ain’t forgetting about me any time soon because I’m not going anywhere!

Now, imagine everything I just said I preached to all my friends when the Worm’s went behind the bunker for a pee break (not quite sure how a pee break works in a vacuum but not going to contest). I sang to the choir who didn’t realise they were at church and it was time to get funky for we were the Moon. It’s like that scene from Guardians of the Galaxy with “WE are Groot”, but you know, way better and cooler and everyone was tearing up and misting up their spacesuit visors. If you could hear applause out here you would.

And so when the Worm’s came back to what they thought were victims they actually came face to face with the Moon wearing badass sunglasses. The Moon is always an afterthought, the Moon is always looked down at (not literally though, it’s in the sky after all), The Moon is thought of a satellite when it’s really a planet, Planet ‘KICK YOUR ASS’ with an inhabitance of ‘US’. 

And as we surrounded the Worms from all angles, surprising them, making them drop their weapons, I finally felt appreciated as Ketchup. I’m in everyone’s fridge and I’m on everyone’s fries. I finally felt the MR in Mr Potato ring true, and that ringing from the Moon’s core starting calling out once more as a suitcase landed on the floor next to us.

The Worms starred with bloodshot eyes at the mysterious box with handles, balloons hanging from its handles; this made me know it was important.

As I clicked it open, everyone watching, I felt a turn. How when I changed my attitude it changed the world around me. That my perspective on life morphed the very being of the events that solidified as the path I walked on. That how I thought was how I was. If I think I’m Mr Potato then I am, so you can’t get through life thinking any lower for it’ll take you down another path instead. 

It’s not easy being cheesy, and it should never be done to get away from anything or to be something you're not, but when there is potential for good deep inside when you have the capability to be better: Embrace it.

The Potato who clicked open this case in front of his old captors wasn’t the sulky self-deprecating defeatist Potato from a few posts ago. No. He was the Potato he was born out of the ground to be! He was the only Potato who could do what he was doing right now, and he was doing it because he believed he could. He was Neo from the Matrix, a man who could only dodge bullets and run round in many layers of leather without dying from heatstroke because he BELIEVED he could.

*Click*

And there before me, as I rose the lid and a gold light spilt onto my face like in Pulp Fiction: a big briefcase full of GOLD!

Earth did pay into the Worm’s demands. And so I thought, what was the right thing to do right now. Well, here are the things I cooooould do:

1) Give Gold to Worms, the technically rightful owners of this Suitcase.

2) Send it back, deals off, I’m in charge now, send the Gold to the previous owners.

3) Take the Gold for us, for the Moon.

Now, let's talk about the reasons behind why I should make these choices:

1) No. Worms’ shouldn’t get rewarded for trying to blow up the Moon.

2) No. Earth shouldn’t be rewarded for forgetting the Moon. 

3) Yes. Because It’s our time to shine like the Moon. 

Because with this gold we can finally build the Suitcase city we deserve. Because the home we have can finally have a bedrock to settle. Much like the Potato I was, it’s time to put down roots and claim this newly christened planet.

First step? We ripped down the American flag, for the Moon wasn’t a girl they managed to bang; it’s not a milestone for human’s ego, no! This Moon is a strong independent woman, and she was giving birth to Suitcase City, which is the first City on this new planet, and I was to be the Mayor!

How did I rise to this? Same way Neo dodged bullets.

For he was the king of Cheese. “Mr Anderson?”, Nah, “My name is Mr Potato”.

[setsunameioh]

Love is (Not) Zero

oh hello yes, it is me, back with some more Halloweneverse AU fic. The center of focus this time? A certain witch, a certain vampire, and a certain confession on a certain bridge!

To that end, please enjoy! As always, you can also read this on AO3!

Something was bothering her.

Kudo Shinichi- currently going by the alias of Edogawa Conan, had known his childhood friend for long enough to tell that much. However, though he had his confidence in his skills as a detective, even he couldn't manage to figure out what, exactly, that something was. And while it was true that he was the type who didn't like not knowing about things, it wasn't that vampiric urge of his that made him desire to know what this something was.

To put it quite simply, he just didn't like seeing that look on her face.

She tried to act cheerful, like her usual self, to be sure. But he wasn't so caught up in the mysterious riddle that he hadn't taken the time to notice that something was wrong, no matter how well she was doing at hiding it.

He wanted to say that it had all started when they had first separated into two groups to look for the person who had been handing out the strange riddle to children, but when he really thought back on it, it had started much sooner than that. It had certainly gotten worse after that, but if he had to put his finger on it, the exact start of it was more or less around when they had boarded the plane to London.

It was the first time in what felt like far too long that he had been able to stretch his legs- his own legs, not those of his runty, all too small child form. Stretch, perhaps, was not quite the right word for it, because while Diana had bought them tickets for first class, even then, he found himself feeling rather cramped. As happy as he had been to be back in his own body, he hadn't missed the trace of something forming in Ran's eyes, still so insubstantial that it would seem that not even she quite knew what it was.

At the time, he'd chalked it up to the fact that they couldn't go on the same flight together. He'd wanted to, but Haibara had been rather strict on that note- different flights, or he wasn't going. As a result, the time that he'd had with Ran at the airport had been short, before she had caught her earlier flight, and he'd barely had time to do anything more than discuss their shared excitement about the coming trip together.

By the time they had regrouped, having failed to find the man handing out the riddle, it seemed to have solidified.

"Ran?" Dropping the neechan for once, seeing as there was no one around them who even knew them, not here in the distant city of London. "Is something bothering you?"

She caught it right away, breaking her attention away from her phone. Though he knew that she was looking at the picture she'd taken of the riddle on it, it seemed as if her mind had been a thousand miles away. Still, just the sound of her name alone had been more than enough to drag her back, if only for a short while.

"Is it okay, Conan-kun?" Ran asked, tucking her phone away for the moment. It wasn't easy to see his eyes through his sunglasses, but she could see enough to tell that the expression in them was serious. "What if someone hears?"

And for the moment, she didn't think it was about the recent case, one which she was still hoping would turn out to be nothing. This wasn't at all how she had wanted this trip to turn out- she thought that she would be having fun exploring London with Shinichi right now, not running around, trying to solve an ominous riddle.

Even if it wasn't in the form that she most wanted.

"This much should be fine, for now at least." Conan told her frankly, motioning for her to follow him. She did so, stepping out of the path of those trying to cross the London Bridge, a slight frown on her face. "A witch and a vampire don't really stand out all that much in London."

"Japanese ones do." Ran pointed out, but had to admit that he did have a point. Just turning her head back, she spotted three other witch hats peeking out of the crowd. In Japan, even in Tokyo, seeing that many in one place was a rare sight, but here in London, things were different. Aside from her mother, she only really knew two other witches, and only one of them around her own age.

If only her magic was more useful here. She did have a spell that allowed her to return things to their owners, but since the man handing out the papers had willingly given them up, it was completely useless. It wasn't the first time that she had found herself confronted by the fact that she had clearly chosen the wrong fields of magic to study, but that didn't mean it bothered her any less.

Even though she was a witch, she couldn't do anything to break the curse that had been cast on Shinichi. A curse in pill? She'd never even heard of anything like that! Of course it bothered her that she couldn't do anything for him! The fact that even Akako, who specialized in curses, couldn't even begin to untangle the labyrinth of curses the had quite literally been doused with, did nothing to ease her troubled mind.

She wasn't sure if it was better or worse that Shinichi didn't hold it against her at all.

"Fair point." Conan admitted. "But since it seems like something is bothering you, Ran, I want to speak to you a little more frankly."

"Nothing's bothering me." Holding up her hands, Ran gave him what she knew was in truth, a rather strained smile. "Except for maybe this riddle, that is. Missing dinner with Diana-san is bothering me as well."

"Well, that's true." She was being honest about both of those things, Conan could tell, and wasn't about to brush either of them aside. It would of course, be terrible if something big really did happen here in London, and given Ran's personality, she was the type who felt that missing something one had been invited to was terribly rude.

But that wasn't just it.

"But there's more to it than that, isn't there?" Conan asked. "Is it because the trip that you had been planning so hard for turned up this way? Because as soon as we figure out what this riddle is about, we can-."

"That's not it." Ran said, shaking her head. "That's not it, Conan-kun. I'm really not bothered by anything, so we should really just concentrate on the-."

"Ran." His voice was so serious, that she knew that he had seen right through her. "Tell me."

Ah, it was no good. Even in that tiny body, when he looked at her like that... and yet, she couldn't help but be frustrated. He'd seen through that much, and yet somehow, he wasn't able to tell the most important part? It would seem that just as she thought, she had gotten her hopes up for nothing. After that time at the restaurant, she had that maybe, just maybe, their feelings were mutual, and had resolved herself to wait, feeling that for sure the next time she saw him again as himself, he would finish telling her what it was that he wanted to say.

And yet, the next time they saw each other, really saw each other, he had nothing to say except for things about London and Holmes, nothing different than usual. It was as if she was the only one who had been thinking of that day the entire time, and that she had just gotten carried away by herself, tricked herself into thinking that there was something there that was never going to be there.

Of course it was like that. While it was true that witches lived longer than normal humans, in the end, Shinichi was a vampire. He had a practical eternity in front of him, so there was never any reason for her to think that he would actually ever fall for someone who couldn't keep him company during that.

How stupid of her.

She must have shed a tear, because she could hear Conan's voice, startled at the sight of it. "Oi, Ran-!"

"It's stupid." Though she meant to try and contain them, the words came out anyways, and like a dam breaking, refused to stop. "It's stupid. Here I was, getting excited all by myself, just because you said you had something important to tell me. I've waited all this time, you know! For you to be in a position where we could talk, really talk again, and yet..."

"It really is just like Minerva-san said." She was making a scene now, she knew, but for the moment, she couldn't find it in her to care. "Love is zero. No matter how much you add to it, you'll only lose."

"Minerva-san?" Conan began, for a moment, looking as if he were going to open his mouth to ask something else, before he quickly decided against it, instead shutting it. Whatever was going through his head, it only took him an instant to reach it, clenching and unclenching a fist.

"I'm sorry, Ran. But can you wait here just a minute?" He wasn't looking at her, she could tell that much, even through her tears. As she thought, she really never stood a chance, did she? Of all things, telling her to wait, after saying something that important-!

"Wait? Are you seriously asking me that? Now?" Ran asked, reaching up to wipe away some of her tears, an effort that was largely in vain. No matter what she did, it seemed as if they didn't intend to stop coming. "Why? So you can run off and solve another case again, leaving me behind?"

She hadn't quite meant to say that, but she didn't entirely feel like taking them back either.

"Because you're right." Conan said finally. "I do have something important to tell you. That's why, just for a minute or two Ran, I need you to wait."

"Fine." Ran said finally, drawing in a long breath. "I've been doing so much waiting all this time, even though you've always been by my side. I can wait a minute or two longer, I suppose."

After all, when it came to Shinichi, a minute would soon turn into two, three, four, and before she knew it, hours would have passed. It was always like this, and yet... and yet... no matter what she did, she didn't think that she could get rid of these feelings of hers.

"Ran."

It was the sound of a voice that she hadn't expected to hear for another few days that broke Ran out of her thoughts. Standing before her was not Edogawa Conan, but rather, Kudo Shinichi- and for a moment, it was all that she could do to swallow, the gears in her head working, but not quite producing a response.

"...Shinichi?"

"I told you, that I had something important to say." Shinichi said, taking a step forward. As he placed a gentle hand against her cheek, the coldness of his touch proved him to be very real. "So important, that I couldn't possibly ever say it as Conan."

"But the antidote for the return trip..." Ran mumbled, her brain trying to sort out what was going on here. What could possibly be so important that he would...?

"It'll work out somehow. Don't worry about it." To be honest, he actually hadn't thought about it at all. Even if he did figure out a way back to Japan, Haibara was likely to kill him once and for all when they got back there... but for the moment, he only had one thought in his head.

He didn't want to see Ran cry.

Sure, scooping her up in his arms and sitting her in his lap was hardly necessary to that end, but if he'd let her feelings get twisted up to this extent, this sort of thing was the least he could do. Even in London, where there were any number of witches and vampires milling about, they made quite the scene, seated on London Bridge as they were.

For once, he didn't care.

"Shinichi, what-!"

"It's true that love might be zero, but I think Minerva-san's math is a little wrong." Shinichi told her. "Zero is just the beginning. Without it, nothing can start. So that's why, Ran... there really is something important that I want you to know. More important than anything else."

"I love you, Ran."

"Eh?" For a moment, Ran could have sworn that she hadn't heard him right. "Shinichi, did you just say...?"

"I'll say it as many times as I need to." Though in truth, just saying it once, and so directly at that, already had him as a bundle of nerves. But for Ran's sake, he was willing to say it until she got sick of it. "I love you, Ran. It's always been you."

"But-!" Ran opened up her mouth to protest, before she stopped herself, shaking her head. Reaching up to wipe away her own tears, she couldn't help but think that their direction had changed- these were no longer tears of anguish, but of joy.

The smile that blossomed on her face nearly made him fall in love with her all over again, were such a thing even possible. That really wasn't fair, Ran- it was that sort of smile that had made him fall in love with her in the first place. Using it here was almost cheating!

"So that's how it is." Shinichi told her, one hand straying up to his cheek. "So don't cry, Ran."

"I won't cry." Wiping the last of her tears from her eyes, Ran leaned up a bit closer, carefully pressing her lips against his cheek in a kiss. "I'm not a crybaby, after all."

"Ran, it's-"

"No, don't worry about it Shinichi! I was the one who caused this to happen, so it's only natural that I should take responsibility for it."

"But-"

"No, it's fine. You're not exactly heavy or anything."

"Ran, I-!"

"You hurt your legs, didn't you? It's alright. Just let me carry you back to the hotel."

Heaving a long sigh, realizing that this was a fight he was not going to win, Shinichi resigned himself to his fate. Pulling the brim of Ran's hat, which she had loaned to him, down lower, he could only imagine what kind of scene they made, a witch carrying a vampire princess style through the streets of London.

It... definitely had not been in the plan to get so flustered by that one kiss on the cheek that he'd all but burst into a cloud of bats, nor had it been in the plan to have two of said bats crushed underneath Ran's legs. She had been quick to apologize of course, but once he'd returned to human form, she'd been even quicker to scoop him off his feet, not even giving him so much as a chance to protest.

Well... he couldn't claim that this wasn't one of the reasons he'd fallen in love with her.