#DEAREST SIUAN!

[thatordinaryoddity]

wip: letters to you 🤍

i‘m not okay y‘all. this is how i cope.

here‘s the finished piece btw

[wibblyv]

DEAREST SIUAN

[deeplyridiculouslyinlove]

Thinking about Moiraine calling Siuan her “dearest friend” in The Great Hunt and realizing that I think Siuan is actually Moiraine’s ONLY friend.* She left behind all other friendships or possible friendships when she left the Tower in New Spring. I am not okay!!!

*I’m not counting Lan because when you literally are in someone’s head and they’re literally in yours I think that’s a distinctly different type of relationship. I also think the warder bond (especially how it operates in the books to shape their relation to one another) complicates it in a number of ways.

[skyholly]

The best kept secret

Summary: What if Moiraine had a baby daughter she and Siuan were forced to leave to Anvaere to raise as her own?

moiraine/siuan

Chapter 1 here!

Chapter 2 here!

Chapter 3 here!

Chapter 4 here!

Chapter 5 here!

Chapter 6 here!

Chapter 7 here!

Chapter 8 here!

****************

Chapter 9. Rand

She’s a mirage , Rand thought in disbelief, his eyes softening with affection nonetheless, then I must be dying already . But what a precious sight she was; death really could not greet him with kinder hands than to have her be his last vision. Despite his vision being blurred, he could still make out her figure, dressed in a lavender-coloured gown, pale and soft against the glow of her skin; he could make out the warmth of her hair, the ever-present brightness and kindness in her eyes. She was so lovely, as lovely a sight as there could be. Ilyena, Gwen, he loved them both the same. 

“Gwen,” Rand breathed her name, his lips curling into a peaceful smile, his voice laced with a tender sweetness. The pain pouring from the venomous dagger embedded in his side spread through his entire body, feeling as if it were scorching his muscles, bones and skin away. His vision was foggy, but he could still discern Guinevere rushing towards him, painfully kneeling above the debris by his side, her arms instinctively reaching for his blood-tainted stomach. The warmness of her skin against his overcame any pain he might have been feeling, and suddenly his mind became clear once again. She’s real… she’s real and she’s here, he realised, his heart sinking into his stomach. That cannot be. She shouldn’t be here. Ishamael is here, she will get hurt — “W-what are you doing here?” Rand heard himself stutter, voice shaken with apprehension, “How did you get here? I thought Lanfear…”

The girl promptly shushed him, as she delicately traced his injury with her fingers, as she closed her eyes, imperceptibly reaching for the Source. Rand stared in awe at his torn skin starting to heal itself back together, stopping the bleeding and the poison from spreading any further. In only mere seconds there was nothing left but a darkened, muddy mark over his skin where the knife had been once buried. He lifted his gaze to Guinevere, his eyes filled with devotion, before Egwene’s screams of pain brought him crashing back to the harsh reality of their situation. All of his dearest friends were there, endangered because of Ishamael, because of him, it was his fault they had been caught up in such a mess. You will carry the weight of their deaths. 

“Rand, Rand!” Mat urged him, softly shaking his shoulders. It took Rand a moment to realise he was lying on his friend’s arms. “You’re gonna have to do something.”

The readheaded boy lethargically raised his hand, trying to reach for the Source, but found nothing but a void in its place. He felt harrowingly empty. 

“I- I can’t,” he blubbered, drowsily starting to remember the events that had taken place prior to Mat throwing that dagger at his stomach, “I’m shielded.” 

Rand heard someone nervously sigh by his side, and saw Guinevere close her eyes in desperation, clutching the blue stone hanging over her chest as if in prayer. And then suddenly, he sensed the weaves that restricted him starting to grow weaker, and the shield over him fell apart, he could feel the Source once again, almost begging for his touch. Or is it the other way around? He heard Guinevere exhale a shaky ‘thank you’, before letting a lonely tear fall through her cheek. 

He stumbled out of Mat’s hold, screeching resounding in his ears, as Perrin and Gwen helped him up, and he walked towards Egwene, whose breath and stability were growing weaker by the second due to her efforts to protect them from Ishamael’s attacks. Gwen attempted to follow him, but he gently pushed her into Perrin’s arms, away from any possible danger. He could practically feel the girl’s fury showing on her face, but didn’t look back. 

Rand reached Egwene’s side, as her shield that had protected them faltered away, and picked his sword from the ground right next to her, the heron mark on its hilt dangerously shimmering under the sun. He walked with steady, fast steps towards Ishamael, reaching for the Source, letting it engulf him whole; and a grunt left his lips as he embedded the sword right into the man’s chest. Rand knew he was doing the correct thing, for he was both protecting his friends and the world by killing him, but he couldn’t help but feel a pang of something he couldn’t describe in any other way but grief, as he kept pushing the tip further into the Ishamael’s heart. The blade’s iron melted itself into the One Power, digging a fiery hole into the Forsaken’s chest, and then with a thud the sword’s hilt crashed futile into the ground. Rand felt a scorching sensation sear through his hand, and his eyes widened in astonishment as he looked down to find a heron shaped mark burned into his skin. He tried to make sense of it for a moment, but got distracted. With a painful groan, Ishamael quietly dropped to his knees, his whole body following afterwards, raising a cloud of dust around him. 

The redheaded boy stood over him, still in shock, amidst a silence so profound he was certain he could hear a pin drop.

“Its…” Ishamael mumbled, struggling to breath, “it’s beautiful. Do you see it, Lews?”

Rand shivered at the mention of the name. It felt both distant and unnervingly close, like a step into an abyss from which he could never return. “What do you see?” He asked, eyebrows frowning in confusion. 

“Nothing.” The man whispered, as the hole in his chest turned into ashes, corruption that started to spread throughout his entire body. “Nothing at all,” Ishamael finally said, before his whole being turned into dust, drawn into the turbulent air hitting above the tower. Rand sensed his eyes filled with tears, knowing he’d done the right thing, yet somehow feeling as if he had just lost a dear friend to him. 

He became startled by the sound of bells echoing all over the city, and he raised his head to golden weaves of Power that burned like the fire start encircling the tower, rising to its top, where all of the group stood still almost paralysed in distress. Rand followed the bursts of fire and light, seeking for their source as he made his way towards the edge of the Tower, with Guinevere closely behind. There, they witnessed the bursts of fire coalescing into the unmistakable form of a dragon. Gwen let out a frail gasp, one of her hands covering over her open mouth and the other instinctively reaching for his, clutching it in dread. The flaming dragon rose over them, heated screeches coming out of his fiery mouth, and Rand firmly pulled Guinevere further into his side, encircling her waist with his hand. 

She drew her gaze up towards him in a wavering motion, desperately meeting his eyes, “ ‘ Above the Watchers shall the Dragon be proclaimed… ” Guinevere recited, “ bannered ‘cross the sky in fire .’ This is Moiraine’s doing,” she breathed, eyes glistening with sorrowful tears, as she gently put her hands over her cheeks, tiptoeing so their foreheads could touch, “the world will now think of you as Dragon Reborn, Rand, and she thinks you stand ready for it.” 

The boy stared back at her for a couple of seconds, tightening the grip on her waist, as he looked down, towards the cheering crowds; men and women embracing each other, embracing their children, embracing their friends, smiles drawn across their bloody faces. He drew in a trembling breath. He wasn’t sure he was ready for such a weight to be placed upon his shoulders. 

As if she had read his thoughts, Guinevere gently forced his eyes towards hers back again, as she tenderly caressed his cheeks. “You’re not alone in this,” she affirmed, nodding, biting her lips. 

Rand lowered his gaze, his eyes studying their surroundings, and found the rest of his friends joining them at the edge of the tower, all of them staring in awe at the acclaiming crowds below them, as the dragon’s roars resounded over them, and realised Gwen was right, he wasn’t alone anymore. And that remained his biggest problem.

He needed to prove himself, to prove himself worthy of carrying such a mighty banner, and he couldn’t bring himself to endanger his friends, endanger Guinevere because of it. He realised then he had no choice but to leave his friends, once again.

But he could afford a moment’s waiting. For now, he could appreciate the friends that surrounded him, the trust, love and support he felt from them, for he knew how fleeting such sentiments would be. He rubbed Guinevere’s back, feeling the warmth emanating from the dragon’s breath over her ragged clothes. He felt her skin through the tears of her gown, and couldn’t help but think about the torture Lanfear had put her through, and the lengths she must have gone through in order to reach him, to save him. Rand left a shy, sudden kiss on Guinevere’s forehead. And for an instant, everything felt alright.

*****

Author's note: So this is it, the "final" chapter. I write "final" because there WILL be an epilogue (an 10th chapter) but I will only start writing it once I finish proofreading and HEAVILY editing these past 9 chapters, which could take as much as a month even.

I really hope you've enjoyed the story this far; in the meantime (and risking being greedy), I'd really appreciate it if you could share this story with people you think will enjoy it. As most of you know, I haven't read the books, so I'd love some new insight on how the caracters behave, on the world building, and maybe possibly a beta reader to help me bring all of this together more neatly.

The epilogue will be very out of both show and book canon, and YES, there will be a Moiraine and Guinevere reunion, and a little bit of a Siuan's POV.

To answer another requested question, I WILL continue this story after Season 3 airs, most possibly with a different title, but under the same series.

Once again, I cannot possibly express how much your comments mean to me and how encouraging they are, I really hope you haven't been dissapointed with the turns the story has taken and that you've found it engaging, enough to make you wait for the epilogue ahah.

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this and leave kudos and comments, we'll see each other soon I hope!

[readingaway]

Dearest Siuan... a Forsaken has gotten way more than just their hands on him

[cha-faile]

So in WOT ep 6 we got a glimpse of young Siuan and her past. Do you think we will get any flashbacks of little Moiraine in the Sun Palace in season 2? What scenes or moments would you like to see most? How long do you think we'll have to wait before we will get a flashback of Siuan and Moiraine the pranking queens in the White Tower?

I have so many ideas and hopes for S02 cold opens! Tiny!Moiraine is one of my dearest wishes. Since we saw a bit of Siuan’s early childhood and personality, I would guess that if we get a young Moiraine cold open, it’ll be similar. In the books, Moiraine was a wilder with a few tricks she developed, particularly using her kesiera as a focus to eavesdrop in the Royal Palace of Cairhien. iirc, she was also thrown a going away feast once her channeling ability was discovered. So I hope to see a glimpse of her family life, and her being a teeny tiny little spy dipping her toes into Daes’Damar.

Tower Pranks with Siuan would be amazing, too, but if we only get one Moiraine-related flashback I would rather see bby!Moiraine teaching herself how to channel in order to dig up dirt on Cairhien nobles.

[torashisama]

Siuan says, “Can you imagine, Moiraine, if one of the Forsaken got their hands on him?” Are we supposed to believe that Moiraine and Siuan have written six months of letters and Moiraine never mentioned Lanfear?

YES. It's a time line thing really. Moiraine learned about Lanfear the night she got attacked by the Fades rescued by Lan then both rescued by Verin and Tomas. During the 6 months she only knew that "the last battle of s1" was actually the first one hence the reasearch about the forsaken, it was only confirmed with Bayle Domon trough the poem and broken cuendillar. She hadn't realise that Ishy had been freed until she was able to figure out that broken cuendillar meant broken seal and therefore free Forsaken.

Then, when she realised that she HAD to tell Siuan about her being stilled she still couldn't get herself to admit it so she wasn't informed. Then, she only took the time to write something when she had Rand and they were back at the house and she was still stuck on making her stilling something tangible so she never sent the letter and Siuan only learned about it thanks to Lan.

If Moiraine didn’t write about being stilled and didn’t mention Lanfear, what in the world was she writing to Siuan about?

And they might have been writing to each other the sweetest, cutest, most romantic letter ever and obviously sharing info on what they gathered to try and solve the mistery of the broken cuendillar at the eye and what it would mean for their mission.

Her not talking about being stilled implies that Siuan also didn’t know about Rand leaving since it basically tells us that she omitted the details and probably wrote something along the lines of it "dearest Siuan, we were wrong it was not the dark one but Ishameal, we defeated him but something is fishy, found a broken cuendillar so I think it might have been our first battle and not the last, need help solving this puzzle because I have no idea of what it could mean"

( I'm re-explaining and refining my theory about S2E07 as of now, so I'm going over and fact-checking and coherence-checking everything right now, so ask away if you have more questions.)

I promise I’ll stop talking about this soon because I’m a few weeks behind the Discourse having just done this rewatch, but the main reason I personally think something was up with Siuan and Rand in the throne room in 02x07 is Siuan’s comment to him about using him as a weapon but not having him be the general. She didn’t get to be the Amyrlin without knowing that’s a dumb thing to say to *anyone,* especially anyone you want to work with you, let alone the dragon reborn who is the most powerful person in the world.

Two other things:

- Siuan says, “Can you imagine, Moiraine, if one of the Forsaken got their hands on him?” Are we supposed to believe that Moiraine and Siuan have written six months of letters and Moiraine never mentioned Lanfear? If Moiraine didn’t write about being stilled and didn’t mention Lanfear, what in the world was she writing to Siuan about? Unless she was trying to cut Siuan out entirely, which we have no reason to think she would. I guess maaybe it hasn’t been enough time to send a letter about Lanfear to Siuan.

- Why would Siuan want to announce Rand as dragon in Cairhien? Not only would that abruptly abandon the prophesy they’ve worked towards for decades and sacrificed everything for, wouldn’t it also bring all the forces of the dark to them immediately with only 14 Aes Sedai? Wouldn’t it be better to keep him a secret if they actually wanted to use him in the way she discusses? Or to declare him in Tar Valon where they can draw on all the resources of the White Tower?

I’m still not sure I think the heartbreaking ending of that episode was part of a scheme between Moiraine and Siuane—the “if you have ever loved me, don’t do this” feels too raw to me to be fake—but I *do* think something very weird was up with them in front of Rand.