#Crav Nah

[sebeth]

Legion of Super-Heroes #5 (Bendis)

Warning, Spoilers Ahead…

The issue picks up where the previous issue ended: the confrontation with the Science Police. Brainiac 5 convinces the Science Police to stand down. Superboy (Jon) is told to finish the orientation packet.

The Legion speculates on why the President of the United Planets sicced the police on the Legion. Is it because of Mordru? Aquaman’s Trident? Imprisoning the ruler of Rimbor in their basement? A combination of all three?

Shadow Lass talks trash about the Invisible Kid. Jacques Foccart, the “Invisible Gentleman” is sick of the disrespect and quits the Legion. Bendis included an actual canon person of color only to have them appear and quit in one panel? Was there a point to this?

Jacques was never a favorite of mine mostly because he was relegated to the back to mutter a random French phrase. I did enjoy Jacques’ role in the “5 Years Later” era. He became a respected leader of the resistance and had an adorable relationship with Infectious Lass. I would love to see more of that Jacques.

Brainy sends Ultra Boy, Dawnstar, and Shadow Lass to find the Trident. Jo isn’t happy because he wants to remain and deal with his father. Brainy tells the group that if they see Timber Wolf, Monster Boy, or Wildfire to grab them. I’m pretty sure we saw either Timber Wolf or Monster Boy a few pages ago. The Legionnaire had the colors of Timber Wolf and the chest symbol vaguely looked like Brin’s. The person’s build was too bulky for Brin and his head had a Frankenstein-type appearance so I’m assuming it was Monster Boy.

Brainy confronts Chameleon Boy on his secret: Reep’s mother is the president of the United Planets. This has roots in previous continuities as Reep was revealed to be the son of RJ Brande’s son (the Legion’s founder and financial backer) in the original version. RJ Brande also served as the President of the United Planets (the reboot if I remember correctly). Bendis may have also taken inspiration form Lyle Norg’s story in the threeboot – he was revealed to be the son of a high-ranking Science Police officer during a SP-Legion confrontation.

Reep says he has a complicated relationship with his mother, but they are on speaking terms. He just wanted to get out from under her reputation.

We turn to Bouncing Boy and Superboy. Chuck reveals his father was trash. Did we know much of Chuck’s parents in the previous continuities.

Jon resumes Computo’s orientation program. We witness the UP President announcing the formation of the Legion of Super-Heroes. Oh, and we discover the President’s name is R.J. Brande. RJ is female instead of male as in the previous continuities, but does gender mean much to a race of shape-shifters?

RJ references previous heroic teams like the Justice League and the Teen Titans. Crav the General Nah and President Omacc of Rimbor aren’t fans of the idea. Is Ommac a reference to OMAC? OMAC, or One Man Army Corps, started out as a Jack Kirby creation. It was not part of the Fourth World/New Gods line but one of his sci-fi flavored ideas like Ben Boxer and Kamandi.

OMAC was radically altered when it was part of the “Infinite Crisis” tie-ins. They were multiple OMAC machine-like beings. Sasha Bordeaux (Bruce Wayne’s former bodyguard) was partially changed into an OMAC. The New 52 had a version of OMAC but I never read it so I don’t know the details.

Does President Omacc or Braal now have connections to OMAC? Do we need another connection to the 20th/21st century?

RJ pitches the idea to Imra, Garth, and Rokk. Garth has no idea who the Justice League is as “They don’t teach any Earth on my planet”.  Rokk fanboys out: “The original Superman and the Batman from Planet Gotham. And there was a Thangarian classic with those awesome wings.” Rokk’s knowledge makes sense as he was a big-time 20th/21st century historian in previous continuities.

Garth also notes his planet “barely teach us to read our first language”. I don’t recall illiteracy being a problem on Winath in previous era. Mostly I recall a twins-majority population and a focus on agriculture.

RJ notes Jon Kent invented the United Planets. Do you know how old Jon would have to be to have formed the United Planets? I understand the lifespan of a Kryptonian varies from the different eras but Jon would be ancient. And why are the Legion allowing Jon to view this? Wouldn’t that be an outside source influencing the course of his life? I seem to recall the Legion not telling Clark of his life in the past so they wouldn’t impact the course of his 20th century life.

Rokk, Imra, and Garth agree to form the Legion. Sgt Blokk of the Science Police walks by and Rokk offers him membership. Blokk agrees. I’m not positive he is aware of what he agrees to.

I love Blok, he’s so sweet, gentle, and endlessly curious about those weirdo organic beings he hangs with.

The trio then travels to Colu to recruit Brainiac 5 (Querl Dox).

 Brainy agrees and reveals his knowledge of the past heroic era impacts the future. I’m not typing out the whole page of dialogue but I will this quote: “When earth broke into pieces so did its already rebooted and revised history and timeline. Earth could not be more important to us and our survival and yet…it’s all broken. To be translated, interpreted, misinterpreted.”

I could rant on the hot mess that is DC’s continuity but I’ll save that for another post.

Brainy announces Jon Kent is the one to teach them how to hero. Seriously? I understand Bendis was writing the Superman titles at the time but Jon is not at the point in his career where he could be a mentor to other heroes. He’s still a rookie himself

Brainy reveals Jon will be “the one true Superman”  Yeah, that Clark guy? He’s nothing!

Jon is overwhelmed after this info dump. Imra attempts to reassure Jon but is interrupted by Brainy announcing: “All legionnaires! They found the Trident! It’s here. Evacuate immediately!”

Legion Roster Formation Order:

Cosmic Boy (founder)

Saturn Girl (founder)

Lightning Lad (founder)

Blok

Brainiac 5

The big change is Blok joining the group immediately after its formation. In the original continuity, he was a late Silver Age/early Bronze Age addition.

Pros:

Rokk the 20th/21st Century historian-fanboy!

Blokk! More child-like than normal but still a sweet, gentle soul.

Cons:

The heavy focus on “Jon the savior”. Bendis is telling, not showing, why Jon is necessary. The only thing Jon has done so far is knock out Crav – which Mon-El accomplished in a previous issue.

Rokk as uncertain leader. He was useless in the Legion-Science Police showdown. Bendis should read the Threeboot to see how Cosmic Boy handles the Science Police.

The story moves at a snail pace. I know Bendis loves the decompression style but this would have been accomplished in less than two issues in the 1980s.

Paul Levitz’s retro-boot run wasn’t great but all future Legion creators should refer to his classic runs on the Legion to see how he seamlessly interwove a large cast with multiple plots and kept the plots moving at a fast pace. He also had great character interactions and defined personalities for the members of the team.

[protytwo]

Ultra Boy visiting his folks on Rimbor. Art by Mike Grell from Superboy #208.

[second-chance-stray]

RP Log: Riylli, Rising, and Cravs rethink a plan.

(Rising Lotus) Help me come up with a name for my Shiny Marill (Cravendy Hound) meryl streep (Rising Lotus) Mmmmmmmm nah (Riylli Aliapoh) azumeryl streep (Cravendy Hound) sdfs azumeryl

Riylli Aliapoh waves to Rising as she enters the room. "Hey, you finally made it!" She says, despite only arriving herself only about a minute ago. "Okay! Now we can finally start! The goal for tonight is to figure out a way to deal with that Rot lady! And maybe get a little drunk. But just a little, got it?"

Cravendy Hound sweeps a neat pile of sawdust into the corner and then disappears into the back to put her broom away. Contrary to Riylli's suggestion, she comes out with her arms full of bottles.

Rising Lotus walked in and immediately took a seat at the bar, leaning back against the counter. "Do you think it's a good idea to plan while drinkin'? Also you missed bar night last night!...well I 'spose you didn't miss much though. Slow night."

Riylli took her seat beside Rising. "...Wasn't really in the mood." She muttered, waving her hand dismissively. "And were only gonna get a little drunk, remember? Just enough to spark our creativity!"

Rising Lotus shrugs and give Riylli a dismissive wave. "Don't worry I get it, between Mivo an' Mayumi. Nothin' wrong with takin' a night to yourself, you were missed though." she gave Riylli a smile and a thumbs up, spinning on her stool after to eye up the selection.

(Riylli Aliapoh) ("Only a little drunk")

Cravendy Hound deposits everything on the counter, leaving scant room for cups. "Just enough to spark our creativity, aye."

Riylli Aliapoh 's ears folded back a bit at that, not sure how to respond. "I'll... Show up for the next one then... But you better keep those two away from me, got it?" She said, turning to grab whichever bottle nearby had 'Mead' written on it

Cravendy Hound: "A guy came in and showed us 'is lack of eye. Pretty gross." Cravs turns to open the cabinets behind her and places a stack of empty cups at the far end of the counter.

Riylli Aliapoh: "W...Why'd he go and do that..?" Riylli made a face of disgust at the thought. It was probably for the best that she had not been there

Rising Lotus: "Aye he did, looked super gross...though I guess Crav's asked him to show us, an' your not NOT gonna look at that if given an' opportunity right?"

Cravendy Hound: "I told 'im to! Wanted to know if it was just for show," Cravs laughs. She ducks down for a second and pulls up a set of ingredients - frozen pineapple, oranges, cherries and a bit of mint. "...I nearly died gettin' these pineapples awhile back, so. 'ere, I'll make us somethin' tasty."

Riylli Aliapoh stuck out her tongue at Rising. "No way, that's gross!" She grumbled, taking a swig of her bottle. She raised an eyebrow at Cravs' words. "...How do you almost die gettin' pineapples?"

Rising Lotus "They better be tasty if you almost bit it tryin' to get 'em. An' I suppose they could fallen on her, prick her with them pointy parts." she thinks for a few moments. "...do pineapples grow on trees? I know those hard brown things do.."

Cravendy Hound 's mouth sets in a hard line. She pointedly ignores Riylli's question and focuses her attention on juice the fruit.

Riylli Aliapoh gives Rising a worried look at Cravs' reaction, but decides to change the subject. "...Anyroad, all that aint important. We gotta figure out a plan to deal with Rot after all! So... Uh... Any suggestions..?"

Cravendy Hound: "They grow in bushes, actually."

Rising Lotus "So they ain't related to pine trees or cones at all then? Why they called that then?" considering she forgot why they were here before they started drinking, it looked like it might be a long night.

Cravendy Hound: "Well, speakin' in a general sense...we could do somethin' legal, illegal, or in between." Cravs pours a bit of pineapple and orange juice in a glass full of ice, and then dumps the rest of the ingredients in. Vodka, cherry, mint. "I....I don't know, actually? Just know the bush they grow outta doesn't look like a pine tree."

Riylli Aliapoh: "Focussss" She hissed at Rising, shooting her a glare. "Pineapples aint important right now! Aint you supposed to be the smart one outta all of us?"

Cravendy Hound: "Oy, and why ye gettin' 'ung up on the 'pine' part? What about 'apple'? Doesn't look or taste like an apple at all!"

Rising Lotus looks at Riylli for a few moments, the turning to Cravs. "... I don't know if that's a good thing, I mean.. smart enough to not do some of the dumb shit you to do I 'spose...but I guess that's jus' cause one of us has to be alive to take the other two home. Huh."

Riylli Aliapoh: "Wha-? I don't do dumb shite! You've seen my magic, I'm really smart!" She insists, immediately getting sidetracked as well.

Rising Lotus "...you're right... it doesn't taste or look like an' apple...an' I think we all only are smart in like, some very particular areas really. I mean I dunno, I never felt that smart...cept for like fishin' an' fightin'."

Cravendy Hound: "Oy, we're 'ere to talk plans, right?! So come on! Drink up, and get those juices flowin'!" Cravs pushes the bottles aside and deposits cocktails in front of Rising and Riylli.

Riylli Aliapoh eyes the drink suspiciously, but eventually gave in and replaced her mead. Her ears flickered as she tasted it, looking up to grin at Cravs. "It's good! I was worried it was gonna be all bitter like that other stuff you... Er... L-Like other drinks. In general. Y'know..."

Rising Lotus took a long drag from the drink, giving a nod of approval. "What other stuff you drinkin'? I mean I 'spose a lot of booze is bitter." she took another swig, blinking a few times afterwards. "...plannin' though...I think we ought to be careful, loanshark types aren't shy when it comes to doin' nasty things to folk they don't like."

Cravendy Hound: "Is knowin' magic a measure of smartness? Like, couldn't ye just use it on instinct? Then it'd be dumb magic." Cravs rambles as she picks up her own glass to sip on. She beams at Riylli's compliment. "Aye, can't beat a good fruity drink every now and again."

Riylli Aliapoh: "Of course magic is a measure of smartness! All the big mages are real smart folk, like that leh-vee-yur guy!" She said, before suddenly shaking her head. "Wait, no, planning dammit! I say the best way to get rid of her is by gettin' the law to lock her away, like Cravs planned. Just... think we should go about it a different way."

Rising Lotus: "I'm sure she's in the pockets of some of the Yellow Jackets though, coin is worth more than justice most the time. Used to hear 'bout it from my ma all the time growin' up. She'll weasel her way out probably."

Cravendy Hound nods to Rising's words. "Aye. The type where if ye cut off one head, two more will take its place. We definitely should avoid killin' anyone, cause that'll just make things worse."

Riylli Aliapoh glares at Cravs. "Of course were not killing anyone! Were the good guys, we don't do that kind of junk." She said, crossing her arms defiantly. "She can't be in the pockets of ALL those... 'yellow jackets' though, right? Just gotta make sure whatever we pin on her can't be covered up"

Cravendy Hound: "Lever-err...? That's the pipsqueak that was responsible for all that Crystal Brave stuff, right? Or was it...Urrre-ranger." Cravs rubs at her temples as she tries to recall. So much had happened while she wasn't 'paying attention.'

Rising Lotus "That an' we'll probably be arrested ourselves, along with what Cravs said of course!" she took another sip. "Hmm... most folks like her, place to hit where it'll hurt would be her wallet." she rubbed her chin "How many ways does she got gil comin' in?"

Cravendy Hound: "That was my main goal, actually. If people know she's sellin' stolen goods, then even if she pays off the Yellow Jackets, 'er reputation is sure to tank. And then, she won't 'ave the cash or time to mess round with Baldur."

Riylli Aliapoh takes another sip of her drink, clearly enjoying it judging by the way her ears wiggled. "...So how do we go about doin' that? Steal the stolen stuff from her? Or... Set a trap maybe..?"

Rising Lotus "Maybe get somethin' everyone will know will be stolen? Then when she tries to hock it she'd get caught?" she shrugged,  nearly draining her drink with the next sip. "Jus' need to make sure it's somethin' big...but somethin' she wouldn't recognize." she nodded a few too many times at her words, must of been a strong drink.

Cravendy Hound: "...if we steal the stolen stuff from 'er, then it'll just look like we stole it. And I don't think she'd be bold enough to try to sell somethin' that's well known."

Riylli Aliapoh: "...Then... What if we try buyin' somethin'? But set it up so the yellowjackets are there to see it happen?"

Rising Lotus shook her head "Naw, we'd never know if they'd be on her side or not..

Rising Lotus leand on elbow as she ponder, sipping up the remnants of her drink. "What... if...we trick her into stealin' from another type like her...someone more powerful?"

Cravendy Hound: "...It /could/ work. But she sells spice, so 'ow could we prove it was stolen? A bag of salt is as good as any."

Riylli Aliapoh thinks for a moment. "Well... What if it aint yellowjackets..? What if we used the wood wailers? Or the brass blades? Theres no way she'd be in the pockets of those guys, so... If we pull her out there with good enough bait..."

Cravendy Hound raises a brow at Rising's suggestion and thinks to herself. "Might blow up in our faces, but that's an interestin' idea."

Rising Lotus: "I mean that's an option, but she probably has a pretty set territory right?" she slid her glass forward towards Cravs, not so subtly wanting a refill. "It's have ta be somethin' big to bring here out here or in Thanalan."

Cravendy Hound: "Hm, well. Brass Blades ain't worth a penny, but the Wood Wailers might be stiff enough. Problem is gettin' 'er all the way out 'ere." Cravs refills Rising's cup.

Riylli Aliapoh seeing Rising do it, Riylli outstretches her cup as well for Cravs to refill. "Well, you were tryin' to get her attention with milkroot weren't you? I'm guessin' that's what that toad ooze was for at least..?"

Cravendy Hound pours Riylli a generous refill. "Aye, well...the toad ooze is supposed to be the bait. Somethin' that my friends would steal and then peddle to Rot."

Rising Lotus happily retrieves her glass and takes a sip, smacking her lips together after swallowing with a refreshed sigh. "She we still try that? I mean I 'spose we never got a chance to see what happened. Otherwise is there any other powerfull folks that we could trick her to steal from?"

Cravendy Hound: "It'd be more like, convincin' my friends to steal from someone powerful, and then hopin' Mindred buys it 'ot. Lady doesn't steal stuff directly...which means there's a risk that the blame'll end up fallin' on my friends instead."

Riylli Aliapoh noticably winced a bit as Cravs mentioned her friends. "W-What if I tried to sell it to her instead?" She speaks up suddenly. "She doesn't really know me, and everyone thinks Keepers are all criminals anyroad."

Rising Lotus grimaced at that idea. "I dunno, she did meet ya after all... an' you didn't come of as the most...knowin' 'bout business..ish." she hiccupped after getting to the end of her sentence, following it with another swig. "I 'spose if anythin' it is an' in with her..kinda..connects us an' Heartwood too though."

Cravendy Hound gives Riylli a long, hard look, and then finally shakes her head no. "Ye don't look the criminal part of ye ask me. And...I'm worried. Wouldn't we only be able to pin it on Rot if ye actually committed a crime?"

Riylli Aliapoh: "If she thinks I'm stupid, that just means she'll suspect me less!" Riylli insists, "I could easily find somethin' she'd want. I don't even gotta get it myself! Theres this little... Well... A black market I guess is what you'd call it. It get's pretty regular raids from the wailers, but everyone always ends up there again after a bit. If she's there when a raid happens, she'd get locked up for sure!"

Riylli Aliapoh: "I'm a Keeper. That makes me the 'criminal type' in most peoples eyes. Just ask Mivo"

Rising Lotus still looks a bit hesitant. "Do you think she'd go that far out Cravs? An' if this all happens, an' she does get locked away, how she gonna know that...err I mean, How is she not gonna suspect somethin'? She does know who ya are an' stuff, might send some of her lackeys after you, us, your clan."

Cravendy Hound picks up the carafe and tops of Rising's glass absentmindedly...pouring until it overfills. Somethings itching at the back of Crav's mind. "Do ye go to these black markets often? Riylli, do ye...are ye wanted?"

Cravendy Hound: "If we could get Rot to go to one of these black markets, it could just work. But I agree with Risin', it seems risky, and it could come back to bite ye Riylli."

Rising Lotus wasn't paying attention until it ran over her hand. "Hey, HEY!" she quickly reached her hand over to push Crav's hand back enough until she wasn't spilling, flicking her soaked digits in the woman's direction before sipping from the very top of her glass.

Riylli Aliapoh: "I-I do not!" She said quickly. "It's just... Before I started my adventurin' work... My clan didn't exactly have enough gil for medicine and stuff. So... We'd go sell pelts and stuff there... Gridania wouldn't let us sell with them, so we didn't really have a choice... But we never did anythin' bad! All our stuff was caught fair and square, no poaching or anything!"

Cravendy Hound: "...Oh, blast it." Cravs looks around for a towel to soak up the mess.

Riylli Aliapoh: "And if she gets caught up in a raid, theres no way she could blame that one me! We'd just... have to figure out a way to time it somehow... I'm sure someone in Heartwood must have connections, right? All we need to know is when, then we just gotta set up the deal!"

Cravendy Hound lets out a sigh. "Well, Riylli, ye sound used to dancin' round the Wailers. But if ye ever end up tossed in gaol, Risin' and I would be 'appy to pay the bail. Right?" She glances over at the other Roegadyn

Cravendy Hound: "We'll need a real good bait to lure Rot all the way to Gridania /and/ to a black market."

Rising Lotus "I 'spose it sounds like the most...thought out plan we've had all night." she shrugged, sputtering into her drink a bit at mention of paying Riylli's bail. "What? I mean, sure...long as it ain't way expensive or nothin'. How much it cost to be black market sellin'?" she cocked her head as she pondered what they should try to sell. "Well, what she like outside of her normal dealin's? Does she collect anythin'?"

Riylli Aliapoh crosses her arms. "They could never catch me." She mutters, turning away as she let the other two discuss bait

Cravendy Hound: "If the bails too expensive then we could..." Cravs punch a fist into her hand, and then cracks her knuckles. "...but, quietly."

Rising Lotus: "We'd need to pick a bit first before we go out an' steal somethin'." she glances around Crav's room. "...or maybe borrow somethin'? I'm sure we must have somethin' 'round here folks would want to get their hands on."

Riylli Aliapoh turned her head back. "H-Hey! Even if the wailers are mostly a buncha racist assholes, ya still can't do stuff like that! I said they won't catch me, the shroud is my territory remember? Even the Keeper's they got in their ranks wouldn't be as fast as someone who lives out there"

Cravendy Hound: "Anyway, 'ow we gonna lure Rot to the market? Sell stuff so cheap that she 'as to go check it out? Or, maybe if we find someone she trusts, and convince 'em to bring 'er there."

Rising Lotus grumbles "We need to get somethin' she's interested in! That'll bring her in, maybe tell someone she knows 'bout it so she'll come all this way." she took a long drink, mumbling into her drink about repeating herself.

Riylli Aliapoh: "Rising's got a point. Somethin' around here should spark her interest. She sells spice you said..? I bet Luma has some of that!"

Rising Lotus: "Or maybe somethin' really out there...folks with lots of money like weird dumb things."

Cravendy Hound: "Interest is one thing, trust is another...Rot's gonna be cautious, especially outside of 'er territory." Cravs crosses her arms and leans back as she tries to rack her brain people she could pull a favor from. "...Do ye think Momori might know Rot?"

Riylli Aliapoh: "Well... She seemed a bit sketchy, but I only ever met her once or twice. You guys'd know better than me"

Cravendy Hound chuckles a little when Riylli brings up Luma. "HAh! Bakin' and usin' spice is different from sellin' it! But...ye know. Haila might 'ave somethin' cool to sell."

Rising Lotus sneered. "I don't like the idea of ownin' her any favors...but aye Haila might have somethin' she'd be interested in. Or maybe some Gobbie stuff, sure some of that weird metal junk probably is expensive."

Riylli Aliapoh: "But he'd still HAVE some! And probably some rare Golmore stuff too since he's with Haila! I bet that'd get Rot's attention for sure!"

Cravendy Hound: "I'd gladly owe a favor to Momori if it means we can get Rot to come, cause I'm still not sold on the whole 'us sellin' crap to lure Rot' front. Wouldn't random people also want to buy shit?! What if she doesn't come and we just end up makin' a profit?"

Cravendy Hound blinks at at the mention of Golmore. "H-huh?! What in the bloody 'ells is Luma and Haila gettin' into...Bah. The less I know, the better."

Riylli Aliapoh: "Well... First we just gotta find out when the next raid is comin'. Once we know that, then we can figure out a way to convince Rot to show up on that particular night. Dangle some bait in front of her she can't resist! I can make sure it don't get sold to anyone before she arrives so she gets caught red-handed"

Rising Lotus "You know how she is, you sure you want that? Probably end up.. takin' one of your limbs or somethin' after sayin' she jus' needs a hand with somethin'.." she rubs her forehead " After the other day when all that happened I jus' wouldn't trust her."

Cravendy Hound opens her mouth, about to say something to go against Rising's concern...but can't find anything to say. It was true - the lalafell was objectively shady and untrustworthy. But it was those same qualities that made her think Momori would be able to pull the strings necessary to get Rot to show up.

Cravendy Hound: ".....Yeah, well, if she takes my 'and, then I can get a cool robot one."

Rising Lotus pounds her fist on the counter. "You ain't losin' your damn hand if I can help it!" she exhaled through her nostrils sharply. "Ngh..well if we are gonna go through her...maybe I should be the one to ask. She don't know much 'bout me, don't need her usin' your reputation in Limsa against ya." she drummed her fingers on the counter while she nursed her drink.

Riylli Aliapoh raises an eyebrow, but tries to stay on task. "Well... If one of you gets Momori on board, and the other gets some exotic spice, I can focus on finding a seller at the markets we can trust. Then we just need the info on the next raid's date! Momori claimed to have ties to the alliance, so maybe she has connections in the wailers as well?"

Cravendy Hound wags a finger at Rising. "There's no point in worryin' about somethin' uncertain! Damn lalafell might not even be able to 'elp us, so...Let's start by figurin' out about the raid and gatherin' stuff to vendor. The frog ooze can be our first product. I gotta get rid of the stuff somehow."

Riylli Aliapoh grins, clearly rather pleased with how this evening had turned out. "Gimme the toad ooze, it'll be real popular at the market since it makes milkroot crazy potent, so it'd make a great bribe to get a merchant on our side!"

Rising Lotus grumbles more as she finishes up her drink. "Well if we are gonna talk to her let me know an' I'll find her an' ask her..while avoided kickin' her 'cross the room." Her face was looking a bit flushes after she finished her second (and a half with her sloppy top off from Cravs) drink.

Cravendy Hound points at a barrel in the corner with her shoulder. "Ye can pick it up whenever. Just don't open it...apparently, agin' it makes it more potent, as well as smelly."

[spandexinspace]

Okay so I'm not sure if this was a plothole or not, when Crav General Nah, the ruler or Rimbor stole the lost trident, WAS that technically illegal? I'm just thinking, wouldn't he have sovereign or diplomatic immunity? I know stealing artifacts is illegal, but he IS a king so...loophole? Could've been room for legal drama there.

He could probably have some form of diplomatic immunity, depending on how the UP handles those matters. If he does and if it’s the same as diplomatic immunity on Earth he wouldn’t be punished by other planets or the UP themselves for the theft, though he could technically be punished on Rimbor. It also doesn’t seem like they can require him to give back the stolen item, so the only thing Earth can do is threaten him with political measures.

So yeah, could have had some drama there. Would have made the whole thing a little more interesting and probably even more outdrawn.

[sebeth]

Legion of Super-Heroes #3 (Bendis)

Warning, Spoilers Ahead…

The issue opens with Dawnstar giving an infodump on herself:

Her name is Dawnstar Gr’ell. This is the first time in the history of Dawnstar that she has had a last name. Gr’ell is a reference to Mike Grell, the artist who co-created Dawnstar.

Her home planet is Starhaven which has a “deep connection to the earth’s 13th century”.  In the original continuity, Starhaven was an “Amerind colony world”. Starhaven had connections to Earth’s indigenous people and their cultures.  A quick google search shows that the Aztec, Mayan, and Inca civilizations were occurring during this time. Is Bendis hinting Starhaven was founded by one of these civilizations. Is this going to be another “my father was a wolf” moment where he drops a random bit of information and doesn’t follow up on it?  I am not an expert on the various histories and cultures of the First People, if anyone has any other ideas on what the “deep connection to the 13th century” could be, I would love to hear them.

Dawny’s name is derived from “the appearance on earth of the planet Venus, the ‘morning star.”.

Dawnstar takes a moment to gush over Jon Kent even though Dawnstar has never been the type to gush over anything.

Dawnstar’s appearance has been updated. The top half of her face is covered in blue paint/tattoo with a white star on her forehead. Her costume has been updated as well. I’m not sure how I feel about the new costume but I do like it more than her original bathing suit costome.

We switch to Rimbor where General Crav Nah has discovered that Jo is a member of the Legion. He’s not happy about it.

Jon has brought Damian to the future. Damian passes out after meeting Dawnstar.

Back to Rimbor. Cosmic Boy and his team (Ultra Boy, Colossal Boy, Shadow Lass, Mon-El, White Witch) have arrived.

Cosmic Boy is briefing the team on expected behaviors while on Rimbor. Shadow Lass and Cosmic Boy are in a relationship. Which is new. And apparently is news to the rest of the Legion. A Shady-Cos pairing could be interesting but Cos & Night Girl are one of my OTPs so I’d rather have that.

Colossal Boy hasn’t decided if he will keep the code name or adapt another.

Crav Nah arrives and he wants his Trident.

We receive more info on Rimbor. One half of Rimbor has been in constant holy war with the other. Crav intends to unite the world by force (under his command, of course). Jo also wants unity for Rimbor but minus the war and domination.

Cosmic Boy introduces himself and offers in assistance in settling the Rimborian disputes. Crav finds the offer insulting and hurls Rokk across the building. Cue a brawl between Crav and the Legion that Mon-El ends in one punch. Cause, you know, Daxamite. Daxamites are basically Kryptonians with a different weakness (lead instead of kryptonite).

Jo informs Mon-El that per Rimborian law Lar is now the ruler of Rimbor since he defeated Crav.

Mon-El does not want the role.

Gim mentions Rokk is the elected leader so that answers my question from last issue.

Lightning Lad’s team arrives at Dini City in Planet Gotham. Dini is a clear reference to Paul Dini, one of the creators behind the Bataman: The Animated Series and the greater DC animated universe.

Garth’s team consists of Saturn Girl, Triplicated Girl, and Chameleon Boy.

The team is greeted by December Sevenbergen, the commissioner of Gotham.

Tortor arrives to free Mordru from police captivity: “If word in the galaxy gets out that I let you, a master daemon, rot in the bowels of a Gotham jail…”

Bendis has downgraded Mordru on a massive scale if the Science Police are able to contain him.

“Tortor” is revealed to be Saturn Girl’s attempt to enter Mordru’s mind. It doesn’t last long. Mordru is still stuck in a simple containment cell in police headquarters.

Dawnstar summons the team back to HQ before any further attempts to interrogate Mordru.

Crav’s official title is the “Warrior King of Rimbor”. Cosmic Boy’s team has brought Crav to Legion HQ.

Element Lad has the appearance of a blond, green-skinned Shaggy from Scooby Doo. He also has a purple and green striped costume. I don’t like it.

Jo’s costume has spontaneously turned green and red on his return from Rimbor.

Crav is brawling with the Legion. He’s apparently knocked out Jon, which would indicate Mon-El is more powerful than Jon. Makes sense as Mon appears to be older than Jon.

Damian is confused over what is happening.

Imra attempts to telepathically knock Crav out but only succeeds in knocking Brainiac 5 and Wildfire out. Crav is now the third villain to no-sell Imra’s powers. This is the second time Imra has taken out her teammates instead of the villain. It’s only been three issues. Not loving incompetent Imra.

Jon recovers and knocks Crav out. Mon-El states he knocked Crav out first, gets into a hissy with Jon and flies away. Finally, a Legionnaire who doesn’t fanboy over an inexperienced and under-accomplished Jon!

Triplicate Girl tells Jon that Mon-El is really sensitive “which is funny because he’s actually your…” What?! I’m not loving the “Bendis drops a tidbit of info and then ignores it” approach to story-telling.

Damian’s been in the future for five minutes and he already has criticisms: “You need a stronger penal system and clearer sense of the rule of law…”

Brainy has fixed Damian up with a bio-patch so he can breathe/exist in the 31st Century. Imra pitches a fit over Damian, erases his memory, and takes him back to the 31st Century. Jon rightfully calls the Legion out on the hypocrisy of bringing Jon to the future but having a fit over Damian.

Damian’s whole trip to the future was pointless, a waste of pages, and would have been better spent focusing on actual Legionnaires.

Chameleon Boy refers to Damian as “Baby Hitler” and Brainy states “That is a deeply unfair assessment of Damian Wayne…Therefore, we as a group, have dedicated our entire existence to rooting for his success.”

I’m assuming this is a reference to Morrison’s adult Damian storyline. More importantly, is Bendis serious? Why does he think Legion fans want the team to be dedicated Superboy/Robin fanboys?

That’s the purpose of the Legion’s existence? To make sure Damian remains a good boy? I’m starting to remember why I dropped this run at the third issue.

The issue ends with the Trident being stolen – again!

Pros:

Ryan Sooks’ art is pretty

Cons:

Dawnstar and Mon-El’s tidbits could have been interesting if we’d received actual details.

Weak-ass Mordru

Incompetent Imra

Damian’s pointless cameo

The Legion continues to be reduced nothing but cheerleaders for Jon and now Damian.

[sebeth]

Legion of Super-Heroes #2 (Bendis)

Warning, Spoilers Ahead…

The second issue opens with the Legion battling the Horraz.

Saturn Girl orders Tortor, the leader of the Horraz, to surrender. He ignores her.

Brainiac 5 receives a moment’s spotlight to…fanboy over Superboy.

Tortor orders Ultra Boy to hand over the Trident of Aquaman or the Horraz will burn Rimbor. Jo’s response can be summed up as “Whatever. I don’t even like Rimbor”. Not very heroic of Jo.

Imra attempts to telepathically knock out the Horraz but ends up knocking out most of her teammates.

Tortor battles Superboy in the sky.

The trident causes a tidal wave/monster to flood the Legion HQ.

Rose Forrest (Rose & Thorn) meets with the President of the United Planets. This seems to be an in-person meeting as Rose flies away from the President (she has a Legion ring). In the previous issue Rose introduced herself to Superboy moments before the Horraz attacked. How did she find time to get to another planet during the brief Legion-Horraz fight?

The meeting is pointless as the two ladies do nothing but vaguely threaten each other.

Brainy’s tests reveal that the trident contains earth’s oceans.

Rose claims to be the Legion’s official liaison to the United Planets but half the Legionnaires don’t recognize her?

Ultra Boy refers to his father as his “father-one”. He states his father, even for a Rimborian, is unpleasant.

Timber Wolf responds that his father was a wolf. Hopefully, Brin means his father was a werewolf or else this tidbit should be put in the top five of the “worst revisions to a Legionnaire” category.

Jo explains that his father has teams looking all over the galaxy for artifacts: old power rings, mother boxes, the Gemworld Crisis shards.

Wildfire notes that Planet Gotham is the safest planet in the galaxy mostly because no one has the guts to try anything while on it.

Planet Gotham is the first fully artificial planet made by Quayne-Galactic as a monument to Gotham. Jon is confused why anyone would make a monument to Gotham as it was a “garbage fire”. Harsh but fair.

Ultra Boy brought the Trident to the Legion to avoid his father, Mordru, or the Horraz gaining possession of it.

Cosmic Boy decides to lead a diplomatic mission to Rimbor to open a dialogue with Crav Nah: “We’ll try to talk some leader sense into Jo’s dad in the only way Rimborians understand.”

Power and violence?

Rokk puts Ultra Boy, Colossal Boy, Mon-El, White Witch, and Shadow Lass on the diplomatic team. Wildfire volunteers himself for the mission. Rokk de-volunteers him. Good choice as Wildfire isn’t known for his calm nature.  Jo is essential for this mission. Gim, Lar, and Mysa are powerhouses with a calm temperament. Tasmia…depends on the version. Sometimes she is calm, others she’s punch-happy.

Lightning Lad will lead an investigation team to pick up Mordru’s trail. Saturn Girl, Chameleon Boy, and Triplicate Girl will accompany him.

Superboy gets to view the orientation program.

Ultra Boy apologizes for not revealing the identity of his father when he joined the team. He was simply too embarrassed about where he came from.  Rimbor has never been a great planet in any version, but I’ve never known Jo to be ashamed of being Rimborian.

Superboy decides to travel back in time and bring Damian to the 31st Century to see Planet Gotham. This is now the 6th connection to the 20th/21st Century in two issues!

I wasn’t a fan of aging up Jon. This is a good example of why. If Jon was still his younger self, I can completely see him being over-excitable and retrieving Damian from the past. Nine/ten year-olds don’t have much self-control. But Jon is a teenager now – still young – and it has been explained to him that the President of the United Planets is irate over the Legion bringing Jon forward in time. Jon was worried about the repercussions earlier in the issue. Is he really going to “yolo!” and retrieve Damian only a few pages later?

Pros:

Ryan Sook’s art is pretty

Cosmic Boy assuming a leadership role. We aren’t sure who is currently the leader of the Legion. Is the role split between the founders? Rokk’s leadership role of the diplomatic mission is a nice nod to his leadership roles in the 5 Years Later-era, reboot, the threeboot, and the retroboot. Especially the reboot where Rokk frequently interacted with the United Planets.

Cons:

The characters and the dialogue are too generic.

Stop with the references to the 20th/21st century!

Brin’s father was a wolf! And we don’t receive any folloup? Just a quip?

[sebeth]

Legion of Super-Heroes #3

Warning, Spoilers Ahead…

Legion of Super-Heroes #2 by Keith Giffen, Tom & Mary Bierbaum, and Al Gordon.

The issue opens with articles from the “Glitter” column in the Daily Planet from February – March 2991. The articles are written by Baretta West.  

The first article, titled “What Is Tinya Hiding??!” details the rumors of an earlier, secret wedding between Phantom Girl and Ultra Boy.  The couple had recently announced a wedding date of June 2991.

The second article is the official wedding announcement: “The bride is the daughter of Winema Tinya Wazzo, a prominent Bgtzlr attorney and leading authority on privacy law and step-daughter of attorney Khard Wlessey.  The groom is the son of Crav Nah and the late Mytra Nah, agri-engineers on Rimbor…Their secondary and advanced schooling was conducted primarily at the Legion Academy in its days as an exclusively academic institution…Both have regularly supported numerous charity drives.  Wazzo currently serves as honorary chair of the Friend In Need Foundation, which operates shelters for runaways, the Superboy Scholastic Foundation, and the Intergalactic Heart Fund.  Nah is spokesman for Straight Buddies of Rimbor.”

The third article contains more information on the upcoming wedding.  It’s set for June 9th at the Prism Cliff Chapel on Deltwan. It’s going to be an intimate wedding – family, close friends, and Legionnaires only.  It will be a traditional earth-style wedding with Tasmia Mallor serving as matron of honor and Reep Daggle as the best man.  Marla Latham will give Tinay away and the Ranzz boys will serve as ringbearers.

A few notes on the articles:

1)      The secret wedding.  The Legionnaire are known across the universe so they would be subject to gossip, rumors, and have to deal with the paparazzi.

2)      The Legion Academy.  I don’t think it was ever stated that it served as an education facility before the introduction of later characters like Dawnstar and Laurel Kent.  It makes sense though – the Legionnaires were young and would still need to receive a college education – especially in the earlier years with the age limit ending their Legionnaire activities in their early 20’s.

3)      Tinya seems to have been named after her mother.

4)      Jo and Tinya sponsor charities that reflect their past experiences.  Tinya, a previous runaway, chairs a foundation that assists runaways.  Jo, a former member of a Rimbor gang, works with an organization that aims to keep the youth of Rimbor off the streets.

5)      Tasmia is the obvious choice for Matron of Honor.  Mon-El or Superboy would have been the clears picks for Jo but both men are deceased at this point.  

Whittram’s Alley, Rimbor, present day:  The science police are pursuing a Sklarian woman named Kono.  The police are annoyed that Kono has snatched their badges.  A gleeful Kono thinks to herself: “Not if they’ll just send in two more badges, Jo’s record is done for.”  I’m assuming Jo set the badge-snatching record in his youth and not in his more mature years.  Kono escapes her pursuers by phasing into the Loose Caboose club.

The chairman of Silverale LTD, Rimbor’s most profitable corporation, complains to Kakiqik (a Khund) about Kono and Jo Nah.  Kakiqik perks up at the mention of Kono: “We would pay extremely well for the opportunity to eradicate her…Her pacific transgression need not concern you.  Kono has shamed the empire…She will pay the price.”

The officers pursue Kono into the club.  An officer is reprimanded for his wandering eye.  The officer claims “Well, what if that’s what our quarry looks like with her clothes off?”

The second officer states “Nah…she wouldn’t pull that trick again.”

Kakiqik sends Khunds to the club to apprehend Kono.  He assures his men “Unlimited force, no questions asked.  Silverale LTD guarantees it.”

The screen in Kakiqik’s office reveals more information about Kono: Brita An’Nan of Sklar. Ability to shift mass between herself and other objects/beings.

Shots break out in the club and several officers are caught in the line of fire.  Kono phases in the sewers and flees the area.  Kono is pursued by Algronsk and Kaston, a huge pair of bruisers.

Jo and Ginny are finishing up a romantic encounter as a commercial for Silverale plays on the screen. The ad briefly features Dartalon of the Wanderers.

Jo notes “The heat’s been on a little, that’s all.  May have to bunk elsewhere for a while, just to keep ahead of ‘em.”  Jo, in the process of shaving, is interrupted by Kono.

“What the Nykx are you doing?!”

“I’m shaving.  What’s it look like?”

“It looks like you’ve contracted rabies.  What’s that white junk?”

“I’m using an antique shaving set.  Gift from a friend.”

“So you figure you gotta use it?  Must be some friend.”

Ginny has left the apartment but is ambushed and murdered by Algronsk and Kaston.

We switch to Lydda and Loomis en route to Kathoon.  Loomis is uncomfortable with the cost of the meal: “It’s tough to enjoy a meal that costs enough to feed a family on Braal…for a month.”

Lydda advises Loomis to relax:  “Making yourself miserable isn’t going to help anyone on Braal, y’know.  That husband of mine’s been trying it for years. Hasn’t worked yet.”

Loomis wonders if it’s just him “or did everyone involved in this Legion thing turn out a little nutso.”

“People do crazy things for lots of reasons, Loomis.  Principle, honor, friendship…love.”

Algronsk and Kaston destroy Jo’s apartment building.  The duo celebrate but decide to check for survivors: “Our masters are such sticklers for survivors.”

An unhappy Jo emerges from the flames.  

“Jo Nah.  Then you did survive.”

“That’s why they call it invulnerability, pal.”

“But – but how did you know to use it?” “I don’t drop it needlessly.  Or didn’t you check into that before you went butchering god knows how many innocents?”

Kono phased into the sewer tunnels beneath the apartment building and are soon joined by the brawling trio.  Jo and Kono quickly destroy their Khundish attackers.

We head to earth where Shvaughn Erin returns to her apartment.  Dirk Morgna has sent her flowers accompanied by a note: “Shvaughn, I live for the day when you’re mine, my beauty.”

“Dream on, buddy.  I ought to give him a romp.  He could use the lesson…think’s he’s gonna get everything on a silver platter.”

Circe, a Science Police chief, orders her probe-droid to research Shvaughn: “We need something on her.” Shvaughn’s record is spotless so the droid is ordered to look into her aquaintances:  Feliz Alana, Leeman Allen, Hass An, Cat Anestopoulo, Suzi Apczynski, Brek Bannin, D. Spengler Benita, Ral Benem, Arad Bensam.

Ral Benem is the Chorlophyll Kid and Brek Bannin is Polar Boy.

Circe dresses up to look like Shvaughn and has a bedroom romp with Dirk.  Is Circe’s interest in Shvaughn due to jealousy?

Jo searches the wreckage of the apartment building and finds the remnant of his antique shaving set. It’s inscribed “Long Live the Legion, Rokk.” The set was given to Jo by Cosmic Boy which makes sense as Rokk is a huge history buff.

The issue ends with Roxxas leaving his prison cell.  Roxxas has had a clear break with reality as he argues with himself – with five different voices/personalities – for the entire page.

Roxxas and his pirates are the ones responsible for the annihilation of Element Lad’s race.

The issue ends with an article from the May 8, 2991 edition of the Daily Planet: “Search for Wazzo ends; Worlds Mourn for LSH vet”.

The article states “Wazzo was lost on April 12 while traveling alone from her other-dimensional home world, Bgtzl, to Earth.  Scientific observers believe the ‘fabric’ of the interdimensional gulf between Bgtzl and Earth was suddenly, inexplicably ripped apart during Wazzo’s journey, killing the Legionnaire.”  It’s noted “Among Legionnaires, Wazzo has served the longest consecutive term. Wazzo’s presumed death would mark the seventh passing of an active Legionnaire, but the first to occur outside of the line of duty.  Active Legionnaires who’ve been killed in action include Garth Ranzz of Winath (since revived), Andrew Nolan of Earth, Lyle Norgg of Earth, Condo Arlik of Phlon, Pol Krinn of Braal, and Lar Gand of Daxam.  Heroes killed after having resigned from the Legion include Kal-El of Krypton (the legendary other-dimensional hero Superboy) and Val Armorr of Earth”.

It’s mentioned in the article that “A high-ranking officer in the U.P.-wide SP confirmed that Wazzo’s fiancé, Jo Nah, insisted that the investigation be taken out of the hands of the SPE and turned over to the SP proper.”

The article informs us that Tinya joined the Legion at 15 years old and was 32 years old when she died. Tinya was the fifth individual to join the Legion following the founders and Luornu Durgo.

Notes on the article:

1)      “Presumed dead” is the classic comic book style death.

2)      Garth = Lightning Lad, Andrew = Ferro Lad, Lyle = Invisible Kid, Condo = Chemical King, Pol = Magnetic Kid, Lar = Mon-El, Kal-El = Superboy, Val = Karate Kid

3)      Jo’s insistence over the investigation being taken out of SPE’s control is an indication of the growing corruption of Earthgov.

4)      Tinya served 17 consecutive years without taking a leave of absence!

I love all the details and easter eggs in this issue and the entire run.  It’s a nice test of your Legion knowledge.  That said, you don’t need to know the obscure tidbits to enjoy the issue.  Maybe. I’m not the best judge here – the Legion was the first comic ever given to me – way back in the 1980’s.  I’ve devoured everything Legion-related since encountering that first reprint digest.

We’re definitely still in set-up mode – Reep and Rokk haven’t even made it to Rimbor yet. Lydda, my favorite female Legionnaire, receives more panel time.  Yay!  

Kono’s an interesting character – a bit obnoxious, reckless, but she showed concern over the innocent bystanders caught in the cross-fire during the club shooting.  Kono’s powers are similar to Phantom Girl but she has more offensive capabilities.

Jo’s in an interesting spot. He returns to Rimbor after Tinya’s death and seems to be running a gang.  It appears to be a “Robin Hood” style gang.  I’m assuming Jo’s no longer the spokesman for Straight Buddies for Rimbor. I like the nod to Jo’s cleverness. Why would you turn off invulnerability? Jo may have left the Legion but that doesn’t mean the numerous bad guys he’s helped imprison or going to adopt a “live and let live” philosophy.

Dirk’s on a slippery slope. His playful womanizing from previous runs is taking a creepy turn.

The release of Roxxas is an interesting choice. Roxxas wasn’t used often before this run – his first appearance detailed his role in the massacre of Trom.  He had a later appearance where he believes he’s haunted by the ghosts of Trom.  Present day Roxxas has no pirate fleet and no super powers – the only thing he has going for him is buckets of crazy!