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nicosraf · 2 years ago

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I have to ask how you came up on the idea to write ABM? I just wanna know your thought process because I'm wildly intrigued. I'd love to know how you'd feel about a lesbian story between Lilith (Adam's first wife) and Eve which is what my story is about.

Hello! So usually I'm pretty secretive about all the stuff behind Angels Before Man and why it's like That, but I recently saw a tweet that wrongly assumed the motivations behind the book, and it upset me a bit, so I should probably finally go into detail about ABM's deal. Sorry if this answer is way too long.

1. Personal reasons: in 2016, I came out to my parents during a very rough period for my mental illness. It went very bad, and I ended up going to a therapist for a few month for, well, conversion therapy. This involved using a lot of Christian manipulation tactics ("God would not make you this way") and EMDR techniques that have done quite a bit of psychological damage to me. In 2021, while working with a new therapist, I had a "died and met God" nightmare, then developed an unhealthy obsession with the Bible as I processed what happened during conversion therapy. Another thing I need to mention is that my family are immigrants from an epicenter of the Mexican drug war, which exposed me to a lot of violence very young, and traumatized me in its own right; how I think about the violence we perpetuate on the people we love is something I just really wanted to write about, also. All this to say that ABM is just a convoluted allegory for trauma.

2. Theological reasons: during my obsession, I read the Bible in its entirety a couple times, and I developed a lot of questions about it, especially regarding angels and this Lucifer guy:

Why did Lucifer/Satan become evil? Ezekiel 28 is usually the passage people refer to that explains it (others argue this section isn't about Lucifer/Satan but let's assume for the sake of argument that it is). What's interesting about this section is the emphasis on the cherub's "blamelessness" (innocence! Lucifer's young innocence isn't talked about enough) and his beauty. In fact, his corruption is entirely linked to his beauty.

But what does beauty mean? To God? What is beauty before humanity? What is the purpose of it? How can you become corrupted by beauty? (For this, I looked at Ezekiel 16, where Jerusalem is corrupted by her beauty; this inspired quite a bit of the story of ABM as a whole, particularly regarding God's wrath)

What are angels for? What do they do? I asked a couple friends this and usually they answered that it was fighting demons and protecting humans, but there was a time before demons and before humans. (There was an "angels before man" if you will haha). This seemed to stump everyone I asked. Did they just worship? All the time???

Why does the Bible compare angels' submission to God to a wife's submission to her husband? (Well, that's a least an interpretation of 1 Corinthians 11:10). This is related to Jesus explicitly stating later that angels can't marry. Why not? It's especially weird, at this point, given the matrimonial relationship between Jesus and the Church, and God's own somewhat matrimonial relationship with Mary. So everyone can have a romantic/sexual/spousal union except the angels? Why can't angels love?

This isn't a question but it really strikes me that Michael's only line of dialogue in the entire Bible is in the book of Jude and just as a reference to a time when he allegedly argued with Satan and said "Lord rebuke you." Ah. Michael. That brings me to the last major question I'll mention.

What was Michael and Lucifer's relationship? Something really cute is that everyone I harassed with my questions seemed to have this idea that they were best friends, that they really loved each other once. There's no scriptural evidence for it, and we only ever see them fighting, but it just seems like it makes sense, doesn't it? Strong, golden-hearted Michael and the beautiful, doomed Lucifer...

And of course the duality of God as both jealous and loving fascinates me. Even more so I'm fascinated by the concept of a lonely God. Jealousy, to me, only makes sense when you're insecure about love. How could an all-knowing God be insecure about love then? Maybe because he loves different than you, and he'll never have anyone who can love him the way he understands love (no matter how much he wishes, because he's a lone god)

Somehow all these questions came together and formed a story while I was outlining.

3. Technical reasons: I've been wanting to write a full novel that didn't follow the 5-act structure for a while. I wanted to write a novel that had no source of tension for a majority of the narrative (the source of tension early in ABM is just from the reader; you know what's gonna happen, but the book doesn't allude to it until about Chapter 11, and even then it's vague). I wanted to write a book that's radically differently paced in the second half. And I wanted to be a bit experimental stylistically (inspired by the Latin American Boom authors). Angels Before Man gave me all the opportunities to do this, I'm afraid.

Ultimately, Angels Before Man is really weird!! I'm both very happy and very shocked that people have enjoyed and understood it. I'm incredibly grateful when someone lets me know that my little self-published gay Satan book has been healing or cathartic to them. That's all I can really ask for tbh! Again, sorry for such a long answer, but I'm riled up about my intentions being misrepresented.

And finally, Lilith x Eve sounds really interesting!!! I have a lot of thoughts on the double creation of the sexes in Genesis (so, so, so many). I'd be ecstatic to see your take on it <3333 :)

#again im sorry this is SO LONG ASHDKNDD #yall dont want to know what that tweet said about me #lord #anyway #thank you so much for the ask!! i really appreciate it #angels before man #forgot to mention the lines in Paradise Lost where John Milton says angels love to have gay sex #the queer aspect to angel/demon media is another rabbit hole that Morgan Dante left a fantastic anaylsis about on the ABM goodreads page #check that out for sure #on the trauma thing: sometimes i get some pretty rude comments on how people dont like the direction the book went #its very okay not to like my book but please dont be rude to me fr #ask!#mine #realizing now that i forgot to mention the story of Sodom as well #ill save that for another post skkskaks

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broomsticks · 1 year ago

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Heyy! I was wondering, can you help me out with some drarry recs? I read a few drarry fics YEARS ago and honestly don't remember them at all, and the past few years, I've only read marauders era fics. I want to explore drarry a bit, but in a lot of the fics i try out the pairing seems kinda illogical. Yk like the fic just pushes them together bc it's a drarry fic but it doesn't really make sense beyond that. Maybe I've just had bad luck. But that's why i wanted to ask whether you have any recs that could get me into the pairing again. I think i mostly want canonish stuff (no crazy AUs), and lengthwise im alright with whatever, but a longfic would be nice!!

so first off - thank you for thinking of me hahaha, but I'm not the best person to ask because I don't read a ton of Drarry! (I say that and it's my third most bookmarked ship, behind Wolfstar and Jily.) it's not a ship I'm particularly wild about either, for similarrrr reasons to you it sounds like (not a huge fan of postwar redemption arc and if I'm going to read that I usually would rather read lightning gen femslash, and most of the AUs tend to read sorta 'any two guys' to me), but I have read a bunch I enjoyed and I do have a couple faves:

Listening for the Angels by @hawksquill // 12k, M

The trials are over. Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy are in Azkaban, the Ministry has seized Malfoy Manor, and Draco is banished to live among Muggles. His exile brings Draco more than he ever bargained for: a Squib therapist, Muggle friends, a new career, and a mysterious pen pal who helps him come to terms with what it means to grow, heal, and make amends.

lmao I know I just said postwar redemption not my jam blah blah, but the writing of this one is just lovely. it's Draco-centric and more pre-slash gen than relationshippy, but the character growth is so well done.

What We Pretend We Can't See by @gyzym // 131k, M

Seven years out from the war, Harry learns the hard truth of old history: it’s never quite as far behind you as you thought.

the plot. the relationships. the conflict. the humanity. I remember this one totally sweeping me away! gyzym also wrote one of my favorite aziraphale/crowleys (build me a city, call it jerusalem, 3.5k, T), pre-show/dated 2012, give this a try if you'd like a quick taste of their writing, it's what motivated me to start reading that Drarry longfic!

I found the sentient house magic intriguing in this one:

The Claiming of Grimmauld Place by bixgirl1 // 75k, E

When Grimmauld Place begins fighting against Harry’s ownership of it, he decides he needs help to train the historic home — but little does he expect that it’ll be Malfoy who’s most suitable for the challenge. However, as Malfoy and Harry get closer, Harry comes to understand that expectations aren’t always the best path by which to guide his heart — and in the process learns just what is needed to make a house a home.

I will say this ship has a lot of a) magical theory, particularly sentient house magic, b) auror partner casefics, and c) mysterious medical maladies, so if that's something that interests you I can rec a couple more!

last but not least I know you said no crazy AUs, but you did also say Wolfstar, and I was just rereading this to rec it elsewhere: here's an online romance Drarry AU with HIV+ Remus and Wolfstar raising Harry. Angst, smut, fluff, family... this fic is lovely.

Dragons Don't Know Paradise by @teacup-tai // 51k, E

In 2004, when Remus spends two scary weeks in the ITU due to complications of pneumonia and his HIV condition, Sirius walks around the house like a ghost and Harry finds comfort and strength in Draco through a chat in an online LGBT forum. Harry falls for him, but Draco has a lot of secrets and, before long, will need to come clean—even if he believes that no one is able to understand a dragon. This is a story about falling in love online and about facing the reality of death, but above all, this is a story about hope, finding love and acceptance. (Non-magical / bookshop AU, written for the 25 days of Drarry 2020)

a couple more recs here for Wolfstar + Drarry!

#drarry #my fic recs #hp fics #hope these were to your taste anon!#stabbing in the dark here hahahaha

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andybondurant · 2 years ago

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New Post has been published on Andy Bondurant

New Post has been published on https://andybondurant.com/2023/02/14/anxiety-finding-peace-in-an-anxious-world/

Anxiety: Finding Peace in an Anxious World

How do you find peace in an anxious world? Is curing anxiety as simple as remembering the stories of God’s goodness?

Anxiety in America

Anxiety is a real problem. According to some National Institute of Mental Health 18% (or 40 million) of Americans suffering from Anxiety Disorder. Others estimate this number to be too low based on people who never seek help or are misdiagnosed. They suggest the number could be as high as 30% of Americans suffering from anxiety.

Of those who suffer from anxiety, 56% have a moderate to high degree of anxiety. So not only do a high number of Americans deal with anxiety (somewhere between 40 and 70 million people), but 20-40 million people deal with a higher level of anxiousness.

Anxiety is a real problem.

My anxiety

While I’ve never been diagnosed with anxiety disorder, I do know the feeling of tightness in my chest, a sense of overwhelming fear, and being too locked up emotionally to make a decision. It’s a horrible feeling. The pandemic of 2020-2021 was a major source of anxiety for myself and millions (billions?) of others. We are living in a world of trauma.

I remember years ago this overwhelming sense of dread driving home from a week long vacation. It had been a beautiful getaway with just Kia and another couple, and now we were making the 10-hour drive home. Pulling away from our lodging, I began to think of a major event I was in charge of just a few weeks away. My pulse raced. My chest tightened. I was overwhelmed.

In the midst of this minor panic attack, I needed help.

We all need help. For some of us, this means we need the help of a professional therapist and medication. That route is always an option, and very possibly the best option for you. If you suffer from anxiety, I encourage you to find the help of a good counselor.

But I also believe help can be found in your faith.

Anxiety in the Psalms

We don’t know much about Asaph in the Bible. It seems he was a Levite who David put in charge of singing in Jerusalem’s Temple. We know Asaph also wrote Psalm 77. He wrote and sang for David, himself and God. Maybe the words of Psalm 77 were for David, who if he were alive today, could easily be diagnosed with clinical depression, anxiety disorder, or some other mental health problem. Of course, there weren’t therapists or medication for David thousands of years ago, so we see David and others like Asaph deal with their anxiety through writing — mostly in the Psalms. Psalms 77 is a wonderful example of walking through the process of finding peace in a time of intense fear and worry.

Be real…

Asaph begins by explaining his irritation with God (vss 1-3). It seems God is silent in a time of need. Asaph continues with his frustration, and then he asks six pointed questions of God (vss 4-9). He asks questions like, “Has God rejected me?” “Has God forgotten to be gracious?” “Is God really loving and faithful?”

Then Asaph reaches his lowest, most fatalistic point:

“And I said, “This is my fate; the Most High has turned his hand against me.””

-‭‭Psalms‬ ‭77‬:‭10‬ ‭NLT‬‬

This is no longer a question, but it is a statement. God is against me. I have all the evidence I need through my fear, worry, and doubt, and on top of all of this…God is silent!

If you find yourself in this same place, I encourage you to be like Asaph. Be real with both yourself and God. It does you no good to pretend that everything is okay. It doesn’t help to ignore your feelings. You won’t find health – in your faith, emotions, or even your physical body – if you are honest with yourself and God.

Don’t be afraid to be real with God. He is God. He can handle ALL of your emotions. God created you and your emotions. He understands you intimately.

…then recall

Something switches in Asaph after asking these questions of God (in truth, accusing God of being faithless). Beginning in verse eleven, Asaph stops and remembers.

“But then I recall all you have done, O Lord; I remember your wonderful deeds of long ago.” ‬‬

-‭‭Psalms‬ ‭77‬:‭11‬ ‭NLT

At his lowest point, Asaph makes a choice to remember all the good things God has done. Beginning in verse 15, Asaph briefly recaps the story of God leading the people of Israel through the Red Sea — saving them from Pharaoh. But I want you to notice something Asaph does in this retelling of the story:

Asaph weaves his story into Israel’s story.

In the final two verses of the chapter, Asaph says,

“Your road led through the sea, your pathway through the mighty waters— a pathway no one knew was there! You led your people along that road like a flock of sheep, with Moses and Aaron as their shepherds.”‬‬

-Psalms‬ ‭77‬:‭19‬-‭20‬ ‭NLT

Asaph remembers how Moses and Aaron led the people through the Red Sea, but it’s not just Moses’ story. Asaph recalls an action common in that culture — a shepherd leading a flock of sheep through a dangerous path. His experience tells him this is how God sees us. We are God’s sheep, and he leads us through dangerous and dark paths.

It’s as if Asaph points back to David’s famous Psalm 23:

“The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.” ‭‭‬‬

-Psalm‬ ‭23‬:‭1‬-‭4‬ ‭ESV

Asaph knows God led the Israelites through that dark road. So he remembers the times God walked with him through his own dark valleys. What about you?

In your own life, it’s time to remember the goodness of God. If you are currently in a season of anxiety, this will be medicine for your soul. If you feel healthy and whole, it is preparing you for the next time you are afraid, worried or upset.

Go do it!

You find peace through remembering the good things God has done for yourself and other people.

So today, I challenge you to make two lists. I want you to write them down either physically in a journal or notepad or digitally as a note in your phone.

First, ask yourself, “What good things has God done for other people?”

Make a list of stories from both scripture and from examples God’s goodness in friends and family members.

Second, ask, “What good things has God done in my life?”

Now make a list of both the big things and the small things which are examples of God’s goodness in your life.

Anxiety is real. It’s a problem that will only grow, but you can be free. Find help if you need it, but I want you to mix in the remembrance of the goodness of God in your life.

#Andy Bondurant #David #God #goodness #peace #Psalms #shepherd #story #word of the year

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lovingwisely · 2 years ago

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theyearoftheking · 5 years ago

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Book Six: The Dead Zone

“We all do what we can, and it has to be good enough... and if it isn’t good enough, it has to be. Nothing is ever lost. Nothing that can’t be found.”

When I announced my next book was The Dead Zone, my brother-in-law admitted to never reading it, or seeing the movie, because it felt dated. He’s not wrong. The 1983 movie felt dated when I’d watch it in the 1990′s. But that didn’t stop me from imagining Christopher Walken during the entire book. So, here’s some cowbell for your Tuesday! Sorry, I’m home with a sick kid, doing training for my job, I need to find joy where I can.

youtube

But The Dead Zone is still eerily important. I need to stop reading Steve’s books... it’s too much... first I picked up The Stand during the Coronavirus outbreak, and now I’m reading about shitty politicians during a particularly shitty election season.

Who hasn’t asked themselves the question... “If you could go back in time and kill Hitler- would you do it?”

Being a disciple of Ray Bradbury, I’d have to answer probably not. I read The Sound of Thunder during my formative years, and it hit hard. I’m also a disciple of Steve, and 11/22/63 taught me what a world where Kennedy hadn’t been assassinated looks like. And that fictional world is bleak, my friends.

Let’s get into it, shall we?

When Johnny Smith was a little boy, he was ice skating, and had a nasty fall. This fall gave him mild psychic abilities. A teeny bit of The Shine, if you will. Fast forward to grown-up John, he’s a teacher and living in the quaint town of Cleaves Mills. To keep the quaint theme going, he’s about to take Sarah, a fellow teacher, to the county fair on a date. Presh, I know.

Now... this is when the book just becomes one big homage to Ray Bradbury. The county fair is straight out of Something Wicked This Way Comes; which Steve actually references at one point. The manic laughter, the spinning rides,, the smell of carnival food, and the feeling of something evil lurking just under the surface is all there. It’s a masterful tribute.

On their way out of the fair, John stops and decides to try his luck at a Wheel of Fortune carny game. You know... the type of game you never actually win at. But his Shine comes into play, and he ends up walking away from the game $500 richer (three weeks salary according to Sarah!). But Sarah suddenly feels sick. She blames it on a bad carny hot dog, but I’m pretty sure The Shine is wafting off John like a noxious fume, and she inhaled too much of it. John gets Sarah safely home, and takes a taxi back to his apartment. Well, tries to take a taxi back... the taxi ends up crushed by some hoods out drag racing, and John ends up in a coma for four and a half years.

Yes.

Four and a half years.

I’m not smart enough to do the math and adjust for inflation; but can you imagine what hospital bills for four and a half years worth of treatment must look like? I mean, I’d almost rather they pull the plug on me. It would be less painful than waking up and finding I’m going to be broke for the rest of my life.

John’s parents Herb and Vera are thrilled he’s awake. Vera is cut from the same kind of crazy culty-religious cloth as Margaret White (Carrie’s mom); and believes there’s a holy reason why John is still alive. John needs to have some painful surgeries to have his leg muscles stretched (because, atrophy is a bitch after four and a half years in a hospital bed); and then some spooky shit starts happening. John has discovered he can touch someone’s hand, and learn all kinds of interesting things about them. For example, he touches the hand of Dr. Weizak, and informs him that his mother didn’t actually die in a concentration camp, she’s alive and well in California. Then, he freaks a physical therapist out by telling her she needs to call the fire department, her apartment is on fire. The news media gets wind of John’s new powers, and they start relentlessly hounding him.

While still in the hospital, he gets a call from Herb, letting him know Vera has had a stroke, and is in Cumberland General Hospital (you know, just above Jerusalem’s Lot). So, Dr. Weizak rushes him to the hospital, and Vera tells him a voice will tell him what to do, and she believes in his higher purpose. Then she dies.

Oh, Vera. She’s had a fun life. At one point, she was a member of The American Society for Last Times. “They were led by Mr. and Mrs. Harry L Stonkers from Racine, Wisconsin. Mr. and Mrs. Stonkers claimed to have been picked up by a flying saucer while they were on a camping trip. They had been taken away to heaven, which was not out in the constellation Orion, but on an earth-type planet that circled Arcturus. There they had communed with the society of angels and had seen Paradise. The Stonkers had been informed that the Last Times were at hand...”

I laughed so hard, because of course the crazy cult leaders were from Racine. I worked for a company based in Racine for several years, and one of my co-workers was of this same kind of crazy religious bend. He told me “my lifestyle” flew in the face of what God intended. For the record, my lifestyle was being one of those crazy, new-aged career gals, with a stay-at-home husband raising our two year old. It’s easy to understand what’s so offensive about that.

But the worst part was when this co-worker decided to “treat” his teenage daughters to a home-schooled prom. He rented a limo, ordered flowers, made dinner reservations... and was their date. But no dancing of course, because... religion. When I relayed this story back to my husband later on, he asked me which daughter was going to end up getting lucky on prom night with dad. Ick.

So yes, cult leaders in Racine- 100% believable.

After Vera’s death, John continues his life, living with his dad, healing from his horrible leg muscle surgery, and he even keeps in touch with Sarah, even an ill-advised hook-up for final closure. People keep sending him letters and trinkets, hoping he can help them find lost objects, or solve mysteries. He’s not having it. He just wants to go back to teaching, and lead a “normal” life. But alas, there is this nagging voice (it belongs to Vera) telling him he was awakened from his coma for a reason. He needs to serve a higher purpose. So, he ends up going to Castle Rock, Maine; and helps the sheriff solve a series of murders. Castle Rock is a fun place, FYI. They have a Flagg street there.

After his face is splashed across the tabloids for helping solve the murders, his school district doesn’t want him teaching anymore, and his life has little purpose. After a few years of moping around on his dad’s land, he ends up tutoring young, charismatic, Chuck Chatsworth; and uses his Shine to help Chuck get around the dead zone he has with reading and comprehending text.

A note about “the dead zone”... it’s a term John uses quite a bit to describe the gray area he can’t quite see through/around when he’s holding someone’s hand and telling them something important.

John gets on super well with Chuck’s dad, Roger. One night they’re watching tv, and Roger can’t stop talking about this political wildcard, Gregory Stillson, who is running for a House seat. “The man is a clown. He goes charging around the speaking platform like that at every rally. Throws his helmet into the crowd- I’d guess he’s gone through a hundred of them by now- and gives out hot dogs. He’s a clown, so what? Maybe people need a little comic relief from time to time. We’re running out of oil, the inflation is slowly but surely getting out of control, the average guy’s tax load has never been heavier... So people want a giggle or two. Even more, they want to thumb their noses at the political establishment that doesn’t seem able to solve anything...”

John keeps working for the Chatsworth family, and helps get Chuck into Stovington Prep... yes, the same Stovington Prep as in The Shining. At one point, Chuck is talking about his English teacher, “I like him a lot. Our teacher told us he still lives over in N.H. but has given up writing. That blows my mind. Why would someone just give up when they are going great guns?” I’ll let you draw your own conclusions, but I’m 87% sure his teacher was one Jack Torrance.

In the meantime, Stillson wins his election. And John endears himself further to the Chatsworth family the night of Chuck’s graduation, when he has a vision of a fire at Cathy’s restaurant; where a lot of families planned on going to celebrate. John pleads with people not to go to Cathy’s. Some listen, others don’t, but he does end up saving some lives. And then he becomes a recluse, fixated on Gregory Stillson.

Stillson is a bad dude. He’s done a lot of shady shit, and he’s had a lot of people killed. He also worked in real estate development for a while. Smirk.

He knows he needs to take Stillson out before he becomes President, and gets the country pulled into another war. “I have to do something about Stillson. I have to. I was right about Cathy’s, and I’m going to be right about this. There is absolutely no question in my mind. He is going to become president and he is going to start a war- or cause one through simple mismanagement of the office, which amounts to the same thing.”

Oh, how quaint... when the biggest fear is the President starting another war... not the President getting us all killed by nuclear weapons. But, this book was set post-Vietnam, so the feeling is honest.

John goes to a rally, and hides on the upper balcony, hoping to shoot Stillson. He gets a couple shots off, before Stillson grabs a baby to use as a shield (yeah... really...), to prevent John from shooting him again. John ends up shot by Stillson’s goons and he dies, but so does Stillson’s political career, because of a photo showing him using the baby as a body shield. So, his mission was mostly carried out. We also find out John had a brain tumor, which may or may not have caused his abilities.

So, yeah. That’s The Dead Zone. This was a long review for a really short (by Steve standards) book. But it was fun because there were so many references to his previous five books. And yes, the book was published in 1979, but I feel it still holds up. And it has me wondering how/if Trump supporters would explain away Trump using a baby as a shield. I mean... the man has done far worse than that and has still been elected, so....

God damn, I really did not intend for this blog to become political, but here we are! Welcome to the new climate around election season!

There was one lone Dark Tower reference, “He opened the paperback with the picture of the gunslinger shouldering his way through a set of saloon batwings...”

Total Wisconsin Mentions: 9

Dark Tower References: 5

Book Grade B+

Rebecca’s Definitive Ranking of Stephen King Books

The Shining

The Stand

The Dead Zone

‘Salem’s Lot

Carrie

Night Shift

Next up is Firestarter. Yes, cute little Drew Barrymore. I can’t wait.

Until next time readers, Long Days and Pleasant Nights!

Rebecca

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chiseler · 5 years ago

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La Danse Mossad: Robert Maxwell and Jeffrey Epstein

Media tycoon and former Labour MP Robert Maxwell (father of Ghislaine Maxwell, Jeffrey Epstein’s partner in crime) was given a state funeral in Jerusalem after *accidentally* falling off his yacht – the unluckily named “Lady Ghislaine”. Later it was revealed Maxwell Sr was a Mossad asset who used his vast network of connections and publishing platforms to run editorial interference over his purchased assets to influence enemies and friends alike, ensuring their fealty to the foreign government that had enlisted him for its espionage work.

His tabloid empire was the piss-colored propaganda organ of the interests he served, overseeing its rapid growth and tentacled reach across the globe. More ominously, he was behind the spy agency’s successful attempt to install a trapdoor in software intended for government use, allowing the Israelis a direct pipeline into a vast network of computers installed with undetectable malware.

At the time of his death, the disgraced magnate was under investigation for raiding his companies’ pension funds to cover the losses incurred from his multiple and reckless takeovers, and finance a luxury lifestyle he enjoyed sharing with high profile pals like Henry Kissinger and Barbara Walters. Curiously, many of these fossilized specimens from Robert Maxwell’s roster of friends from the Reagan era would circle around Epstein, most notably Donald Trump whose Mar-a-Lago resort would later become a recruiting center for employer Epstein’s underage “massage therapists”.

Fast forward a couple of decades since the days a casino mogul was gobbling down canapés with the old guard denizens of the ‘swamp’. Notice a similar, if not identical MO in both Maxwell and Epstein’s role in procuring technology for the Israelis, who in turn sold it with undisclosed add-ons, providing an open window into its users’ databases.

Like his predecessor, Epstein had a financial stake in a startup (headed by former Israeli Defense Minister and later Prime Minister Ehud Barak) connected to Israel’s defense industry that provides infrastructure for emergency services as a call handling platform. Considering the company’s connection to military intelligence, it wouldn’t be a stretch to speculate on some of this software’s other ‘special’ features. A variation of the early technology that Maxwell was able to procure for his Israeli bosses was later sold to the Saudis, who leveraged its sophisticated tracking features to assassinate Jamal Khashoggi.

Epstein, like Maxwell, was laying the groundwork for Israeli espionage activities through his interests in companies with a political agenda concealed in products intended for international export. If true, the playboy philanthropist feted and flattered his high profile friends to ensnare them as complicit partners in what amounts to the legal definition of treason. Epstein’s covert activities have undiminished real world consequences for anyone on Israel’s international radar, especially those challenging the status quo policies in place that prioritize “The Jewish State’s” political and financial objectives over actual justice and global stability.

If you have ever asked yourself why Israel’s war crimes and settlement expansion go unchallenged by US lawmakers, consider the career destroying consequences contained within those dossiers compiled by the braintrust behind Epstein’s ’suicide’. “We’ll trade you one US Embassy in Jerusalem for 10 minutes of hidden camera footage of you . . . let’s say ‘enjoying’ a rolled up Forbes magazine”.

Were the surveillance apparatuses installed throughout Epstein’s properties merely a voyeur’s tools, or did he use them to leverage the moral failings of his former friends for purposes that might have risked exposure of more than the nether regions of wealthy pedo-punters? Considering his connections to Israeli defense industries and his own Achilles penis that required, by his own admission, “three orgasms a day”, the answer points to an unslakable addiction that dovetailed conveniently with his state-sponsored sex crimes.

Did Epstein make the same mistake as Maxwell (who had asked for nearly half a billion dollars in “loans” from his Israeli backers to relieve him of his mounting debts) believing the dirt he had in his possession would prove radioactive if released? By this time, the corpulent tycoon was nicknamed the ‘Bouncing Czech’ a reference in most part to his worsening money woes. The implication of this request, if turned down, was the exposure of Israel’s state secrets. Epstein could have also attempted to collateralize the cache of damning evidence still in his possession to secure his his freedom with the same fatal consequences.

Both Maxwell and Epstein somehow evaded the electronics that linked them to the outside world at the time of their deaths, even though the latter had reportedly made an attempt on his own life while in custody. Both men, facing ruination and serious prison time gave their executioners an alibi: They had nothing to left to live for. The establishment media is already trotting out ancient, ding-a-ling conspiracy theories from obscure right wing sources (attributed to Russia, of course) to highlight the absurdity and futility of questioning the official story of Epstein’s death. Verdict: Nothing to see here.

By now, it’s a given that the parasitic and preferred daughter of the deceased tycoon, made the fateful introduction between her new boyfriend and the Israeli operatives seeking an entry level plutocrat to carry out their blackmail operations after the untimely death of his predecessor. An impoverished socialite has to survive in pricey Manhattan somehow, and that somehow was re-establishing the shady connections to the espionage underworld that had recruited Maxwell Sr.

Ghislaine’s later role as Epstein’s Chief Procurement Officer (or pimp for short) gives more credence to the rumors that she is more than just a debased, barnacle-like appendage to a billionaire, desperate to please her platonic partner by “organizing his social life”, but a fully cognizant co-conspirator in an operation aimed at strengthening Israel’s hand in all matters pertaining to its national security interests, or more accurately, its overseas criminal enterprises.

The recent raid on Epstein’s Manhattan apartment was not the result of a so-called Justice Department righting the egregious wrong it committed by letting Epstein off with a slap on the wrist after his initial conviction that allowed him to serve his sentence largely outside the minimum-security facility with an open door policy for its billionaire guest. More likely, the reversal of Epstein’s “sweetheart” deal was a joint operation between the oligarch cabal informally known as the Mega-Group, and the state security apparatuses that do their bidding.

It’s seems likely that this sudden pivot towards justice from a Justice Department initially spooked into inaction by the spook in his custody, was motivated by the need to remove the most damning bits among Epstein’s vast trove of physical evidence against the pervy punters who visited his island getaway for unintended photo ops with underage girls.

Perhaps his own abuse of these minors was a perk he felt entitled to, and one that would be overlooked in the service of “national security”. It’s hard for most people to differentiate between the government he actually worked for and the ruling establishment on his home turf.

It’s possible that Epstein felt his serial transgressions were merely par for the plutocracy and justified in the service of a higher calling.

The ‘Israel First’ philanthropist shared an unyielding ideological justification for his own criminality as Robert Maxwell, whom the British Home Office had considered recruiting for its own intelligence gathering in the mid 1960’s. Having determined that the well-connected, multilingual, rising star politician was strictly “Zionist”, the spy agency withdrew his candidacy.

Epstein’s real crimes had little to do with raping children, despite the overturned plea deal that came about when a federal judge ruled that prosecutors had violated the victims rights by by concealing the agreement from them. The one time teflon-coated “member of intelligence” who was “above the pay grade” of a powerful District Attorney (now a now scandal-tainted former Labor Secretary) was ultimately (and lethally) penalized for not destroying the contents of his secret-laden safes, leaving his handlers still vulnerable to their explosive contents.

Had the doomed financier divested himself of the toxic assets still in his possession, he might still be roaming the earth today, scouring it for new specimens to populate his underage petting zoo. As a result of the Justice Department’s decision to reverse the non-prosecution deal meant to bury the most incendiary facts of the case, lower-rung punters like former governor Bill Richardson and Senator George Mitchell are being publicly named for their part in the sordid scandal. Someone has to take the fall. (Rule number one of PR crisis management: Crucify the insignificant and let them hang out to dry until the public tires of watching the slow motion spectacle of their undoing.) Meanwhile, documented and/or photographic evidence against more powerful players like Bill Clinton and Donald Trump will have already been destroyed in the pursuit of selective justice.

The fallout of Epstein’s spectacular downfall predictably miss the mark as scandals involving the rich and powerful tend to do. Much of the controversy will dissolve into a Cheeto dust maelstrom of disinformation, disseminated on Reddit and 4Chan by incel info-warriors before shooting up a shopping mall or playground.

Subsequent reporting of the case will overlook decades of the elite-driven state craft that elevated corrupt and ruthless entities like Epstein and Trump, both ring-kissing acolytes in their youth of influential mob fixer/political power broker Roy Cohn – himself a serial sexual predator who similarly caught the fancy of fellow deviants Joe McCarthy and J. Edgar Hoover. Follow the money trail from Tel Aviv and you’ll discover an ancestral link between the corpse of Epstein and his ghostly godfathers waiting with his rewards in hell.

Along with the other disgraced and expendable patsies left in the wake of this ongoing scandal is Alan Dershowitz, Epstein’s octogenarian chief legal counsel and ‘wing man’ aboard the Lolita Express. The now unemployable cable news pundit will live out the remainder of his pointless life under a cloud of suspicion. Despite all the damning testimony against him, the statutory rape allegations never quite stick, but follow him around like a sneaky fart, forcing a distance between himself and the rest of humanity that will last until he is engulfed by the sulfurous fumes of his own making.

The former Harvard law professor’s lifelong service to Israel will go unrewarded – not as a result of victim testimony placing him at multiple crime scenes, but in consideration of his own inept self-defense strategy: ”I’m a scurvy rat aboard a sinking ship eating its own tail to stay alive. Pity me”! Dershowitz at this point will be lucky if he can achieve the same pay grade and social status of Lindsay Lohan. Ditto for Prince Andrew who can at least be relied on to expire slowly of gout in his time-out corner at Windsor Castle.

The moral of this story could be “Lie down with dogs and never wake up again with a prison-issued sheet around your neck”. A variation of the old “Lie down with dogs and and wake up as fish food”.

by Jennifer Matsui

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lovingwi · 2 years ago

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Why Every Couple Should Consider Regularly Attending Couples Therapy

Are you and your partner experiencing communication breakdowns, constant arguments, or feeling disconnected? Don’t worry; it’s not uncommon. Every couple goes through rough patches in their relationship, and sometimes working things out on your own isn’t enough. That’s where couples therapy comes in! In this blog post, we’ll be discussing why every couple should consider regularly attending therapy with our Lovingwisely couple therapist Jerusalem- the benefits are countless! So sit back, relax and read on to find out how investing time and effort into your relationship can pay off in spades.

Visit us - https://medium.com/@lovingwisely0/why-every-couple-should-consider-regularly-attending-couples-therapy-2236db3326d5

#dating coaching #Couple Therapist Jerusalem #couple in therapy #marriage therapist #marriage counseling #second time around

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norsesuggestions · 7 years ago

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enter the stage! some of the famous historical lesbians, bisexuals and queers of swedish history: a rough summary

Sophie Elkan: widowed at a young age. will totally get remarried with that man of a good jewish family in austria, who is definitly REAL and yes she might not have met him, but she totally will marry him. in about. 50 years perhaps. but she is too busy writing books about her complicated jewish feelings towards jerusalem and kissing her gf Selma Lagerlöf right now. manage to distract herself so intensely with being a lesbian, she forgets about her “soppused heterosexuality”. also have wit, charm and beauty.

Selma Lagerlöf: always thirsty for the ladies. but also anxious about her psychical disability which gives her difficulty with walking. might be overcompensating with a personality that is non stop on fire, to hide insecury. is always writing about love in all her books. is also a pretty snarky person. a bit of a bad ass lady.

Karin Boye: too good for this earth. mentally ill, but knows it. tries to get help but the help help were sadly shite. also, because psychoanalysis were being a big thing in germany, is suddenly stuck in germany during the rise off nazism, when all she wanted to do was to find a therapist. escapes with her jewish girlfriend, who she works very hard to get out, back to sweden. were so gay, that here sham marriage with a guy, were running joke among the swedish culture personalitetes. were in general the most gay thing that had ever happened to the swedish litterature scene of the early 20th century.

wrote the book 1984, but BETTER, years before George Orwell. based her book, Kallocain, on her and her girlfriends expraince in nazi germany, not on like being a posh crybaby who decided to become a socialist because it were fashionable like a CERTAIN George Orwell. erm. sorry got distracted. read Kallocain. yeah?

Victoria Benedictsson/ Ernst Ahlgren: were kissed 1 time by a guy, and it was so horrid they wrote an entire text about how heterosexuality is a horrid sociaty structure that destroys and corrupts society. were also a small town person, who could not stand the city. also, had the gender emotions, and did not only write under the name Ernst Ahlgren, but also asked to have that name on their tomb stone.

Sofia Vasilyevna Kovalevskaya [Софья Васильевна Ковалевская]: 19th century russian lesbian who were such hot stuff that Anne Charlotte Leffler, who were a swedish author she had met in Berlin, fixed her a position as the first female proffesor of any academic disicipline in Swedens history when she became proffesor of mathematics. were also a good mathematician, BUT also, Anne Charlotte Leffler clearly felt some thirst here. they became a couple when she came to sweden tho.

Anne Charlotte Leffler: well known author and feminist of her time. also so thirsty for Sofia Vasilyevna Kovalevskaya that she convinced her brother, who worked as mathematician at Stockholm university, to fix Sofia a job at the mathematic deprement. *high five Leffler*

To Be Countined….. there are more, so many more.

#norsesuggestions #swedish lgbtq history #lgbtq history #karin boye #queer history #european lgbtq history #sofia vasiljevna kovalevskaya #selma lagerlöf #sophie elkan #victoria benedictsson #anne charlotte lefffler #nazi mention #cw antisemitism mention #swedish history #19th century sweden

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dailyaudiobible · 4 years ago

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11/14/2020 DAB Transcript

Ezekiel 29:1-30:26, Hebrews 11:32-12:13, Psalms 112:1-10, Proverbs 27:17

Today is the 14th day of November welcome to the Daily Audio Bible I am Brian it is wonderful to be here with you today as we continue our journey forward. I guess we’re…we’re approaching the middle of the 11th month now. We’re gonna cross through the middle of this month before the weekend is over. So, a month and a half left in this year and we have already discerned…we've already determined to finish strong and well. And, so, let's dive in. We are reading from the God's Word Translation this week, which is today. Ezekiel chapters 29 and 30.

Prayer:

Father, we thank You for Your word and we thank You for another week in Your word. And it really is true, we’re looking at the weeks that remain versus the weeks that we have already moved through and we see that there’s just a handful weeks left in this year. That seems strange but it is the reality. And ,so, as we as we look at that, we also take the time as we've done so many times this year to look back and see the way that You have them imprinted Your word on our heart and that it has spoken to us in profound and meaningful ways impacting our lives, impacting the ways that we've lived our lives this year and we’ve needed it more than ever because it's been one of the strangest years ever. And, so, we are grateful, and we turn our face forward with tremendous anticipation for all that You have yet to say to us this very year. So, come Holy Spirit, plant the words that were spoken today in the soil of our lives. May we cultivate them, may we care for them and may they sprout, and may they yield the harvest of the fruit of the Spirit within us we pray. In the name of Jesus, we ask. Amen.

Announcements:

dailyaudiobible.com is home base, it is the websites, it’s where you find out what’s going on around here. And You can also find out what's going on around here if you’re using the Daily Audio Bible after pretty much the same fashion by pressing the Drawer icon in the upper left-hand corner of the app screen. So, stay tuned, stay connected.

Stay connected to the Prayer Wall. That's in the Community section of the website. And that is one of the most beautiful resources that we have, prayer - prayer for one another in a number of different ways. So, be aware of the Prayer Wall in the Community section.

We’ve been talking the last few days about the Global Campfire initiative that is occurring right now. We have…well we’ve gone a bit old-school and…which is new school now and pressed up some vinyl, a deluxe, beautiful, really beautiful vinyl addition of the Heart guided prayer album that we released in July of this year at…during the long walk. And it is gorgeous and…yeah…something to hold onto, a memento of 2020, a positive memento of 2020. And, so, we have it available and what we’re doing is saying, hey, anybody who can contribute a hundred dollars or more to this initiative we are continuing to pour into developing home base, which is the app and the technologies that will continue to connect us as we take the journey through the Scriptures. And anyone willing to contribute a hundred dollars or more to this initiative, we want to send you this vinyl addition of the Heart album. So, we had 500 of these pressed up and when they're gone, they're gone and at that point they become…well they become impossible to find. So, they’re something to hold onto. And I thank you profoundly for all of you who have already gotten on board with this. This directly affects how…what we’re doing in developing the app. Our next release will…well should conclude the Badges initiative that we had earlier this year and just being able to look at a glance and see where you are in the Bible from a number of different perspectives. But there is so much more on the docket as we continue to move forward and continue to make this home. And, so, if…if you can get involved, if you feel lead in that direction then thank you so very much.

If you have a prayer request or encouragement, then you can hit the Hotline button in the app, which is the red button up at the top of the app screen or you can dial 877-942-4253.

And that's it for today. I'm Brian I love you and I'll be waiting for you here tomorrow.

Community Prayer and Praise:

This is Candace from Oregon I just want to touch base with Rebecca from Michigan. I hope your birthday was really special and look forward to hearing about it. And I just felt that the Lord wanted me to say to you, he who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it. And I would like to say a prayer over you. Lord, bless Rebecca from Michigan and thank you so much for her life, for all that you’ve done, and I pray that you will just pour a blessing on her. I pray Lord that she will find a true, true friend and life partner. I pray that her immediate problems with technology will straighten out, that she will solve that if she hasn’t already and be able to hear DAB every day without any problems. And I ask these things in Jesus’ name and for Jesus sake because I know that you Lord Jesus love her so dearly and gave your life for her. Thank you, Lord for everything that you’re doing, everything you already have done in her and all that is to come in Jesus’ name. Amen.

Hey Daily Audio Bible family this is Becky and Orlando it’s been a crazy year for all of us. I know 2020 is one year that just I’d like to not have happened. But anyway, I haven’t called in very much this year, but I’ve been listening and right now I’m a little bit behind. I’ve really enjoyed hearing all the new voices and being able to hear some of the old voices like Annette Allison and Shante. I’m so happy to hear from you again in Detroit and hearing that you’re going to come down to Florida. But I have an urgent prayer request for you. My mom is an atheist up in Massachusetts and things are pretty dire right now. Her husband has Parkinson’s disease and she’s now decided that she’s not gonna treat a UTI that he has and she just wants to speed up his progression and now he hasn’t woken up since Thursday and today’s Monday and he hasn’t had any food or drink. She’s not waking him up to feed him or anything or give him antibiotics. And, so, I’m just praying, praying, praying for his soul because as far as I know he is not a believer. And, so, I’m praying that he somehow in the state that he’s in surrenders to Jesus Christ as his Lord and Savior and am praying for my mom’s soul also. And if you guys can join me in prayer for that I would love it. So, I thank you guys and I look forward to checking back in again soon. All right. Bye.

Hi this is Christina I’m a child of God calling for prayer for my family. This Friday when…well…today is the eighth or the ninth, I’m not even sure but this past Friday when Brian…after Brian read about Ezekiel chapter 16 __ of God how He feels about Jerusalem and the betrayal I found out that my husband’s cheating on me. And it’s been a very tough weekend but God has given me a lot of peace and if it wasn’t for my faith in God and my…the Bible studies and this Daily Audio Bible that I’m so much in the word that I can be strengthened with His power to get through it but my son and my daughter are not believers and neither is he of course. Anyways, but could you please look them up in prayer. They are in a lot of pain. My daughter especially is devastated because she had her dad in very high regard. My daughter’s daughters name is Phoebe and my son’s name is Eric my husband is Humberto. He’s agreeing to go to a counselor to counselling or a therapist with me and he’s admitted to the affair. And, so, if you’d please keep me in prayer. Thank you.

Hey guys Eyes of a Dove here and much like Radiant Rachel and Big-Hearted Ben I’ve been compelled to involve my kids in the Daily Audio Bible prayer time. So, I’d like to introduce Ryland and Braden and we’re gonna pray for a couple people. I would like to pray for Joe. This is Ryland. Yeah. I would like to pray for Joe, yes Lord, and that his wife and his daughter turn to God so he doesn’t have to have a lot of stress and anxiety and they stop like hurting…and they’re just causing him a lot of hurt. Yes. And not judge him all the time. Yes, Lord we just pray that the mom and the daughter are saved, and Joe just feel strengthened and we hope to hear from Joe again. And here’s Braden. Hi, thank you guys for praying for me and helping me through my tough times and hopefully God can help some of you in the ways that He helped me. Yeah. Yeah thank you so much you guys and…for lifting up our…our other family member Izzy and how much Braden has felt the impact of your guy’s prayers. And that he can just be a leader to the other broken kids. And we’re praying for all the broken kids out there that are hurting just like Braden’s gone through and what Izzy’s going through and God we just lift and touch them. We just thank you so much Lord. In Jesus’ name. Amen. Amen. Amen.

Good morning my son is…is diagnosed with autism and he’s getting a little older now. And, so, he is dealing with meltdowns. And anybody that has autism…a kid with autism knows that they…a lot of them deal with meltdowns and his are now starting…they went from having one once every week may be every two weeks now he’s having them, three or four of them a day. And, so, he’s only 10, he’s getting bigger and he’s strong. And, so, he’s getting violent and it’s…he’s just such a sweet kid. And, so, it hurts me, and his mother’s feelings and it hurts our hearts to see him act out like that. We know that’s not what he wants to do but he can’t help it. And, so, we’re just praying…we still…just we still believe God’s gonna heal him completely from autism but we’re believing God to…to…to stop these meltdowns. They’re…they’ve gotten a little bit much, overbearing for both of us. So, we just ask you guys to pray and remember him. His name is Michael. Thank you, guys.

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a-course-in-miracles · 4 years ago

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Why Does God Perform Miracles?

Wonders are big organization today. If you have any doubt, type words "wonder" into your favorite online search engine. My personal fave is "The Cat Miracle Diet" web site. This diet regimen assures the very same lean, svelte figure as a lot of pet cats. By eating on reptile tails, blades of turf as well as moths, "you'll discover that you not only feel and look much better, but you will have an entire brand-new expectation on what constitutes food." Do you ever before feel like there are some miracles you can live without? We don't need wonders produced by industry, or phony ones devised by confidence therapists with batteries in their pockets to guarantee that the unwary obtain a jolt when touched. It is no shock that seekers of God desire to experience the power and presence of God in a miracle. "God carried out wonders so He can show individuals He is God," says Wesley, age unknown. Jerusalem's spiritual leaders plotted the fatality of an additional person in addition to Jesus. After Jesus elevated Lazarus from the dead, many Jews got Jesus as their messiah. Lazarus became a strolling billboard declaring Jesus' power over death. "God carried out wonders since he did not want anyone to be unfortunate," states Hunter, age 7. Among my favorite feedbacks to a wonder is the lame guy recovered by God through the Apostle Peter. After obtaining stamina in his feet and ankles, he went into the holy place "strolling, jumping and applauding God" (Acts 3:8). He didn't try to be cool. The healed guy wanted everybody to understand what God had done. "I believe God performs miracles because even more individuals might count on him," claims Valerie, 8. You may believe that the even more wonders God executes, the even more individuals would think. It ain't necessarily so. Jesus claimed, "Woe," and also he wasn't riding an equine. He denounced the people in numerous cities where couple of believed though he had done lots of miracles there. Mentioning Capernaum, Jesus said, "For if the magnificent jobs which were done in you had been performed in Sodom, it would have continued to be until now" (Matthew 11:23). Sodom's notorious reputation and its intense devastation live up until this particular day, yet God will evaluate Capernaum's residents extra severely than Sodom's. What can we learn from this? God holds us accountable for the spiritual light available to us. Think of wonders as laser light impulses that for a little while penetrate the spiritual darkness of this world. Definitely, those that saw Jesus execute miracles appreciated light in such a way that the residents of Sodom never had. We live in a time of unmatched discovery. The spiritual light readily available to us in many ways surpasses that of also Jesus' apostles. We have the full Bible, which was still being composed in their day, and also a history of virtually 2,000 years of the gospel transforming lives and also entire countries. Consider this: Many of us may be awaiting the laser-light-in-the-sky sort of wonder, when the best miracle of all is staring us in the face. God's love for us as exposed in the birth, death and resurrection of Jesus Christ is the ultimate wonder that defies explanation. We do not completely understand why he likes us, however he does. Remember this truth: "But God demonstrates His very own love toward us, because while we were still sinners, Christ died for us" (Romans 5:8). Ask this inquiry: Have you knowledgeable God's greatest miracle, the brand-new birth that God has assured to all that believe in the Lord Jesus Christ?

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lovingwi · 2 years ago

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The Benefits of Online Marriage Counseling for Busy Couples

Love is a beautiful feeling that binds two individuals together, but navigating the ups and downs of married life can be challenging, especially for busy couples. With our hectic work schedules and never-ending to-do lists, finding time for traditional in-person marriage counseling sessions may seem like an impossible feat. That’s where an online marriage psychologist comes in! Lovingwisely.in offers busy couples a convenient and effective way to receive professional support without sacrificing their already limited time. In this blog post, we’ll explore the numerous benefits of online marriage counseling and how it can help you strengthen your relationship with your partner even amidst a busy lifestyle.

Visit us - https://lovingwisely.co.il/the-benefits-of-online-marriage-counseling-for-busy-couples/

#best dating coaches #Engagement Therapy #marriage psychologist #second time around #sex therapy jerusalem #Couple Therapist Jerusalem #couple psychiatrist

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96thdayofrage · 5 years ago

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Did Epstein make the same mistake of Maxwell (who had asked for nearly half a billion dollar in “loans” from his Israeli backers to relieve him of his mounting debts) believing the dirt he had in his possession would prove radioactive if released? By this time, the corpulent tycoon was nicknamed the ‘Bouncing Czech’ a reference in most part to his worsening money woes. The implication of this request, if turned down, was the exposure of Israel’s state secrets. Epstein could have also attempted to collateralize the cache of damning evidence still in his possession to secure his his freedom with the same fatal consequences.

It’s possible that Epstein felt his serial transgressions were merely par for the plutocracy and justified in the service of a higher calling.

The fallout of Epstein’s spectacular downfall predictably miss the mark as scandals involving the rich and powerful tend to do. Much of the controversy will dissolve into a Cheetoh dust maelstrom of disinformation, disseminated on Reddit and 4Chan by incel info-warriors before shooting up a shopping mall or playground.

Subsequent reporting of the case will overlook decades of the elite-driven state craft that elevated corrupt and ruthless entities like Epstein and Trump, both ring-kissing acolytes in their youth of influential mob fixer/politcal power broker Roy Cohn – himself a serial sexual predator who similarly caught the fancy of fellow deviants Joe McCarthy and J. Edgar Hoover. Follow the money trail from Tel Aviv and you’ll discover an ancestral link between the corpse of Epstein and his ghostly godfathers waiting with his rewards in hell.

The moral of this story could be “Lie down with dogs and never wake up agan with a prison-issued sheet around your neck”. A variation of the old “Lie down with dogs and and wake up as fish food”.

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relationshipadviser-blog · 5 years ago

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Esther Perel: 'Fix the sex and your relationship will transform'

New Post has been published on https://relationshipqia.com/must-see/esther-perel-fix-the-sex-and-your-relationship-will-transform/

Esther Perel: 'Fix the sex and your relationship will transform'

Esther Perels breathtakingly frank therapy podcasts Where should we begin not only make for juicy listening, theyve revitalised the stale private lives of millions. Miranda Sawyer listens to the psychotherapist

Passion has always existed, says Esther Perel. People have known love forever, but it never existed in the context of the same relationship where you have to have a family and obligations. And reconciling security and adventure, or love and desire, or connection and separateness, is not something you solve with Victorias Secret. And there is no Victors Secret. This is a more complicated existential dilemma. Reconciling the erotic and the domestic is not a problem that you solve. It is a paradox that you manage.

Ooh, Perel is a great lunch date. All psychotherapists are, in my experience, but shes particularly interesting. Sex, relationships, children; she covers them all in the two hours we spend together. But also collective trauma, migration, otherness, freedom all the good stuff.

Perel is a practising couples and family therapist who lives in New York. Aside from her clinical work she counsels around 12 couples or individuals each week she has two best-selling books: one about maintaining desire in long-term relationships (Mating in Captivity), the other about infidelity (The State of Affairs). She has released two fascinating podcast series, called Where Should We Begin?, where listeners get to listen in on real-life couples having therapy with her. The podcast is where I first came across her its won a British Podcast Award, a Gracie Award in the States and was named as the Number One podcast by GQ.

On top of all this, she hosts workshops and lectures as well as the inevitable TED talks, one of which has been watched more than 5m times. I went to one of her London appearances earlier this year. Alain de Botton was the host and he introduced Perel with quite some hyperbole, calling her one of the greatest people alive on Earth right now. (Perel dismissed this afterwards, though she likes de Botton: He put me on such a platter.)

Esther Perel sometimes sings to her clients; she tells them off quite a lot, especially if they think sex should come naturally. Photograph: Jean Goldsmith for the Observer

The reason for Perels popularity is her clear eye on modern relationships. She says, rightly, that we expect much more from our marriages and long-term relationships than we used to. For centuries, marriage was framed within duty, rather than love. But now, love is the bedrock. We have a service model of relationships, she says to me. Its the quality of the experience that matters. She has a great turn of phrase: The survival of the family depends on the happiness of the couple. Divorce happens now not because we are unhappy, but because we could be happier. We will have many relationships over the course of our lives. Some of us will have them with the same person.

For a while, Perel wasnt taken particularly seriously by the therapist community: she tells me that when Mating in Captivity came out in 2006, it was only the sexologists that thought it was great. This is because her thinking went against long-established relationship wisdom, namely that if you fix the relationship through talking therapy, then the sex will fix itself. Perel does not agree. She says that, yes, this might work, but I worked with so many couples that improved dramatically in the kitchen, and it did nothing for the bedroom. But if you fix the sex, the relationship transforms.

We meet in a boutique hotel in Amsterdam, where Perel orders her food in fluent Dutch. She has a light Belgian accent (she says boat for both), and she wears some delicate gold jewellery, a bit like the Indian hath panja, on her right hand. (Both of these seem to excite American journalists, along with Perels good looks. A relationship therapist who you might fancy, shocker!)

We begin talking about her podcast series. Its an astonishing listen, partly because you get to earwig other peoples problems (always great) and partly because Esthers methods are so flexible: in the first series she got one young woman to wear a blindfold while her partner inhabited a more assertive sexual character, which he did by speaking in French. She sometimes sings to her clients; she tells them off quite a lot, especially if they think sex should come naturally: Who the hell told you that BS?

Series three, released next month, is slightly different to the last two. This time round Perel very deliberately chooses couples at different stages, because she wants to show an arc of a relationship, all the way to its end. Also, she says, I wanted to bring in the way that relationships exist in a larger, social, cultural, context. That context often gives a script about how one should think about suicide, about gender, about divorce and so forth. So we hear from a young couple coping with enforced distance in their relationship: one is US-born and the other is Mexican, without a US visa. Another is a mother and her child, who does not identify as either gender. Another couple, with a young child, have divorced, but seem to get along much better now: why?

Perel finds her podcast therapees via her Facebook page: they apply in their thousands. Her podcast producers sift through, using guidelines that Perel suggests them: this time round she knew she wanted to cover infertility and also suicide. Then theres a lengthy pre-recording interview process where its explained to the couples that, yes, this really is going on air and, yes, they might be recognised (from their voices; theyre anonymous otherwise). Are you OK in understanding that your story will become a collective story? You will be giving so much to others, as well. Its not just for you, actually. And then they have a one-off session with Perel for three to four hours, edited down to around 45 minutes for the podcast.

She loves the format. The intimacy of it, the private listening of it, the fact that you dont see them, thus you see yourself. You hear them but you see you. It reflects you in the mirror. But also, surely, its quite exposing for you? Oh yes. People can come and hear me give a talk, but theyve never seen me do the work and you cant talk about what you do. But when you write a book, that is the first part of exposure. Then comes TED and the podcast. If you ask, What does Perel do? My colleagues know how I do.

Perel is 60 now; I wondered how she found being a relationship therapist when she was younger, in her 20s. Werent clients put off by her youth? Actually, Ive always found that the age of the clients goes up with me, she says. It mirrors. I dont know why. She doesnt think lived experience is necessary, though sometimes she wonders how she had the chutzpah to counsel parents before she became one herself (now she has two grown-up sons; shes still married to their dad, Jack Saul, who is a professor and an expert in psychosocial trauma). But then I have worked a lot with addiction, and Im not an addict.

Interestingly, she came to therapy via drama. Drama and collective trauma. She was the second child of Polish Jews who came to Belgium as Holocaust survivors (Perels first passport was a stateless passport of the UN). In Belgium, they became part of a community of 15,000 Jewish refugees.

Loss, trauma, dismantlement of the community, immigration, refugees All these themes that I observe in the world today, were basically mothers milk to me, she says. Everybody had an accent, a good number of people had the number on their arms. There were no grandparents around, there were no uncles. Its all I knew. Its different than if it was just your parents. Its every home I went to. One of Perels earliest memories is of card games where her parents would talk of a friend, and someone would say, casually, Ah, he was gassed, he didnt make it.

Perels parents had her older brother in 1946, then she came along 12 years later. This was not uncommon. When people came out of the camps, the first thing they did to prove that they were still human was to have a child. They waited to get their periods back, and then they had a child. But then there was a gap of 8, 10, 12 years before they had another. Perel thinks this was because the parents needed to establish themselves in society. Hers ran a clothes shop in Antwerp. The family lived above the shop. They spoke five languages: Polish, Yiddish, German, French and Flemish. Every evening they watched the news in German, French and Flemish, to get a good all-round view.

Divorce happens now not because we are unhappy, but because we could be happier: Esther Perel. Photograph: Jean Goldsmith for the Observer

As a teenager, she was interested in psychology, mostly because she hated the strictness of school. She read Summerhill: A Radical Approach to Child-Rearing, about a British school run like a democracy, and from there she moved to Freud. I was interested in understanding myself better and in people around me. People dynamics. I was quite melancholic and I was often wondering, How does one live better? How do you talk to your mother so she understands you better? Id say the primary ingredient I had was curiosity. I was a massively curious person I still am. She was also a good listener a confidante for her friends. I tell her she would have made a great journalist, and she agrees: That would have been my other career.

After school she went to study in Jerusalem, a university course that combined French linguistics and literature. More importantly, she developed her interest in theatre, which had begun in early adolescence. I assumed she was an actor, but shes talking of improv and street theatre, with puppets, of all things. Big ones, you hold them on two long high sticks, or I did hand puppets. She liked the immediate contact with people and gradually, she found herself merging these skills with her studies, doing theatre with gangs,with street girls,with Druze,with foreign students. At one point she went to Paris to study under Augusto Boal, who created the Theatre of the Oppressed. He would stage fake crises in everyday situations: actors pretending to have a physical row on the Metro, for instance. Perel found it interesting to see which passers-by would get involved and which would turn away.

She moved to New York to do her Masters. She specialised in identity and immigration How is the experience of the migrant different if it is voluntary migration or forced migration? and in how minority communities relate to each other. She led workshops for what were then called mixed couples: interracial, intercultural, interreligious. I knew the cultural issues. I knew how to run a group. I dont think I knew much about couples dynamics.

Around that time her husband, who is a few years older than her, suggested she might enjoy systemic family therapy. I ask what this is. For a long time when people looked at a problem, they thought the problem is located within the person, says Perel. But systemic family therapy thinks that a family, or a relationship, is made up of interdependent parts. What is the interactive dynamic that preserves this thing, that makes this child not go to bed? That makes this man never get a job? That makes this son be such a nincompoop? How is the family system organised around it? You need two to create a pattern, or three or four or five.

Its interesting how therapy has trends, I say, and how those trends manifest themselves in actual life. Couples therapy goes in parallel to the cultural changes and the expectations in a culture, says Perel. During the 1980s her married clients didnt come to her because their sex life was bad, they came because of domestic violence or alcoholism, not because we dont talk any more. Back then, the shame was to get divorced at all, even if one half cheated; now its not to get divorced if one half cheats. She saw clients having problems with infertility, the changing role of women and daughters, the Aids crisis. In the 90s, single mothers, blended families, gay couples with kids. Todays problems, she says, are often centred around people marrying later, after a sexually nomadic youth. Also, modern fatherhood dads wanting to be more involved in childcare and monogamy versus polyamory. Straight couples are becoming more gay, gay couples more straight.

The obvious question, of course, which she has been asked many times, is how Perels own relationship works. She doesnt like to give too many details, but what she does say is that she and Saul give each other a lot of freedom If youve had an interesting life, you have more to bring back, something that energises the couple and that they renegotiate their relationship as it changes. At the moment her husband is entering what she calls a third stage, and he wants to paint more. This means he will be away from New York a lot, while she is usually in New York or travelling herself. We need to, once again, come up with a new rhythm of how we create separateness and togetherness. Its a fundamental task.

She wants others not to copy her own relationship, but to use her work as a way to better their own relationship for themselves. And plenty do. Just the other week a young woman came up to her and asked for a selfie. She said, My boyfriend listens to you all the time, and he comes home and he says, Have you listened to this episode, we need to talk? The podcast is a transitional object, a bridge for conversation. Like a teddy bear that you hold and you say: Its OK, dont be worried.

Like when couples talk through their dog, I say.

Yes, she says. There is such disarray and such hunger about getting help on how we manage our relationships today, on navigating the challenges For the first time we have the freedom of being able to design our relationships in a way that we were never capable of doing before, or allowed to do before. So, I dont give the details of my relationship. Instead I will give you the tools to come up with your own thing.

Season 3 of Esther Perels Where Should We Begin is available exclusively on Audible from 5 October

Try this at home

Three ways to change the way you think about your partner at home

Pay attention to what is important to the other What happens in a couple is that we often give to the other what we want them to give to us. If somebody is upset, you dont talk to them, because when you are upset you like to be left alone. It isnt necessarily what they need.

Roles are often patterns rather than habits If you really want the other person to take out the rubbish, you have to be able to spend two weeks not doing it. You dont say anything. You just wait until the other person finally notices it. When youre not there, the other person sorts the bin. They can do it. Its just that when youre there theyd prefer not to.

Women are not less interested in sex than men, theyre less interested in the sex they can have What makes women lose that interest? Domesticity. Motherhood. The mother thinks about others the whole time. The mother is not busy focusing on herself. In order to be turned on you have to be focused on yourself in the most basic way. The same woman whos numb in the house gets turned on when she leaves. She doesnt need hormones. Change the story.

Read more: http://www.theguardian.com/us

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newssplashy · 6 years ago

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Opinion: Speaking, not sexually, with Dr. Ruth at 90

(Grace Notes)

Dr. Ruth Westheimer was talking about the recent royal wedding — not about Prince Harry or Meghan Markle, but about the woman in the lime-green dress, Queen Elizabeth II.

“I was going to say she’s old, but I am older,” Westheimer said. Actually, no. The queen is two years, one month and 15 days older than Westheimer, who turns 90 on Monday and is in talks for a return to television. But the point she wanted to make did not hinge on exactness.

“I didn’t see her smile,” Westheimer said. Always the therapist, she offered advice: “Somebody should have talked to the queen — look happy so others can rejoice even if you disagree.” Of course Westheimer would have been happy to have been that somebody. “If I were there, I’d have made her smile,” she said. “How wonderful is this — how wonderful that she is still alive to experience change in the British Empire, when a divorced biracial woman can marry a prince.”

Westheimer is still the 4-foot-7-inch dynamo who published her autobiography 30 years ago, when she was only 59 — one review was headlined “The Long Life of a Short Woman.” She has just published another autobiography, this one illustrated, like a graphic novel. So 90 seemed an appropriate moment to ask: What have you learned along the way?

“Oooh, how much time do you have?” she chirped in the idiosyncratic voice that a long-ago listener described as “Grandma Freud.” She continued: “How fast do I have to talk? It’s an important question.”

For a moment, before the conversation turned into a whirlwind account of what she is up to these days, she took stock. “Not only was I one of the first to talk about matters of sexuality, but the timing,” she said. “When I started the radio program in 1981, not many people were talking about sexuality. Not many people were talking about AIDS or HIV. I said you have to use condoms and know with whom you go to bed.”

That was not all she said on the air, of course. “Words like ‘erectile dysfunction’ and ‘vagina’ don’t exactly slip off the tongue,” Vanity Fair said in 2009, when it named her one of “12 women who changed the way we look at sex,” but Westheimer “had a way of talking about them that felt natural even soothing.” Vanity Fair also said she used her clinical training and “sassy attitude to create the first widespread outlet for anonymous, prompt, trustworthy sex advice.”

This was in the early 1980s, before Viagra — and before commercials for Viagra and its competitors. Westheimer preached stimulation and satisfaction, and soon she was a celebrity.

But now there is a problem. “There is an age that does not know me,” she said last week.

So, another television show, for another generation. She said the format would be to go to college campuses and tape episodes with a younger co-host. She would not say where the program would be carried because the contract had not been signed. She did say the producers had initially wanted a woman as the co-host. “I said, ‘No, give me a man,'” she said. “I will let him talk, too — I will discipline myself.”

She has other travel plans besides the colleges: a cruise on the Queen Mary 2, to Canada, giving lectures to other passengers. She has done cruises before, and has always insisted on a behind-the-scenes session with the crew.

“Usually when I go on the boat, I ask the captain to read questions to me,” she said. “The last time, the captain was British, very tall, and had to say ‘orgasm’ and ‘erection.’ Never did they think they would hear the captain talk about the things we were talking about.” This time around, she said, she hoped the captain would have time. “If not, I will take the second-in-command.”

Then there are the new books, both written with Pierre A. Lehu, a friend who has been an adviser since 1981. (“She gave me a title long ago: minister of communications,” he said.) Besides the illustrated autobiography, there is “Stay or Go: Dr. Ruth’s Rules for Real Relationships.”

“Anybody who’s in a good relationship, don’t buy this book,” she said.

That does not sound like a marketing plan that would go over well with the publisher, Amazon Books. She is not worried. “I don’t check with them,” she said.

A documentary is also in the works. The film crew will attend her birthday party Monday night, taping reminiscences from the 400 friends she has invited. It will be held at the Museum of Jewish Heritage, in lower Manhattan, in New York. She is a board member, and when she raises money for the museum, she has a unique pitch. She tells donors, “You get good sex for the rest of your life.”

The humor is disarming, as her humor always has been, but not disarming enough to mask a basic fact of her identity: Before she was “Dr. Ruth,” she was a German-Jewish refugee. She describes herself as “an orphan of the Holocaust, not a victim.”

“I do not call myself a survivor,” she said. “My parents sent me to Switzerland on a Kindertransport.” Her father had been taken away by the Gestapo; after World War II, she learned that her parents had been killed in the Holocaust, possibly at Auschwitz. She emigrated to Palestine, joined the paramilitary group Haganah and was wounded in an explosion.

She retraced her life there a couple of weeks ago with the documentary crew in tow. The cameras were rolling as she assembled a rifle like the one she learned to shoot. But there is a difference now. “Because of Columbine, I would never touch a gun again,” she said.

The cameras also followed her to Haifa, where she visited her first boyfriend. She had known him in Switzerland.

“He was smarter than me,” she said. “Because he was a boy, he was allowed to study in high school.”

This is described in the illustrated autobiography. She said the dormitories in Switzerland had a strict lights-out policy. “But there was light in the stairwell,” she said, so he would pass his books to her. She would sneak into the stairwell and read.

She was in Israel in May when the U.S. Embassy in Jerusalem was dedicated. “I decided not to go,” she said. “I am not doing politics. I talk about sex from morning till night. People like me have to stay away from politics.”

So, for a moment, let us return to stocktaking at 90.

“I saved some lives by saying don’t have one-night stands,” she said. “I’m the same. I’m old-fashioned. I’m still talking about relationships. I’m still saying be careful. Young people don’t see anybody die nowadays, but I say the same to them. They think they can have one-night stands.”

And there was one more thing about the royal wedding, about the bride and groom.

“I’m sure they’re having a good sex life,” she said. “She has had sex before, she found Prince Charming and captured him. They don’t need Dr. Ruth.”

This article originally appeared in The New York Times.

source https://www.newssplashy.com/2018/06/opinion-speaking-not-sexually-with-dr_4.html

#News

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