#Cordelia Hasenbach

[woeful-imp]

Musical Guide to Evil

It took us way to long to figure it out but we've finally grasped enough to piece together something coherent about music in the Practical Guide to Evil. How it took us four re-reads to notice it I have no idea, but better late than never?

The Guide comes with its own internal leitmotivs, songs that make an appearance paired together with a story, and once you realize it the songs stop being just a part of the setting and become another option in the narrative toolbox.

Songs live and die alongside the stories they represent, in the Practical Guide to Evil.

The Legionaries Song makes an appearance in the first chapter, and with it, so does the story of the Legions of Terror, the armies that devastated the Callowan forces, and spearheaded the Conquest. So much so that Catherine herself is at that point dead set on attending the War College to learn from a dangerous enemy. They are strong, and the song establishes that.

The last mention of the Legionaries Song takes place right after the Battle of Kala and at this point the Legions have shattered against each other, the machine of war turned against itself, and when the song is sung then it is bitter and weary, the last notes of the Legions' story, finally slain.

Most obvious is the Girl who Climbed the Tower, which is sticks in the mind of...apparently every claimant to the title of Dread Emperor? I'm guessing it comes back so many times in the Guide because the story of the Dread Emperor is a very old one, so the groove it is set in is deep like few others. From Black hearing it even at his low point at the end of Book 5 to Catherine humming it even in Book 2 after she extorts the High Lords; and of course Akua hearing for half the story.

Which brings me to perhaps the best use of these songs as a narrative tool. When Akua, having seemingly turned coat and half-heartedly plotting in Ater in Book 7, wonders with increasing desperation: "Why wasn't I hearing the damn song!!!?"

Because you've been hearing the leitmotiv for your current story of redemption for a few books now and you haven't even realized, girl. Or did you think the Tyranny of the Sun was stuck in your head for years for no reason?

Other examples coming to mind are the Fox is King when Catherine is dueling the Wandering Bard in the Arsenal in Book 6 (it's even lampshaded and we missed it the first three times...)...She even weaponizes that by lying about it to the Bard.

One of our favorites has to be related to Cordelia Hasenbach. She notably rejects the story, or at least the Role associated with it, but Too Many Cooks is mentioned or alluded to at least twice when she is putting the screws on the Princes. It might very well be a leitmotiv to the story of the First Prince if she had picked the name in Book 5 during the Salia plots.

I think that's all of them but there are a few songs which we couldn't fit within that theory, so...well, if you have takes I for one am curious!

Also there needs to be a melody for ALL OF THESE, like, YESTERDAY.

[dandygoblin]

Hanno of Arward and Cordelia Hasenbach cause I lowkey ship them, platonically speaking ╰⁠(⁠⸝⁠⸝⁠⸝⁠´⁠꒳⁠`⁠⸝⁠⸝⁠⸝⁠)⁠╯

[manettheeternalelir]

A Practical Guide to Evil

So I've sat with it for most of the day, and while I think I'll be ruminating on it for much longer than that, here are my thoughts.

Obviously, spoilers.

First, Akua Sahelian. Even going in knowing that she was going to get a redemption arc, I was thinking that maybe I misremembered the name, that it was another character that was going to be redeemed. Especially after the demon at Marchford and of course the Doom of Liesse. I will admit to literally squealing when Catherine broke her fucking bones after 1st Liesse. As the story went on, I began to forgive and forget, and to be honest by the middle of Vol. 7 I was like get over it and kiss her, Cat. I guess I just never felt that bad about the Doom after the Everdark, despite the narrative's insistence on reminding me of it. Maybe that's good writing, that I liked Akua so much, maybe not, idk I'm just a little guy.

Hakram was a great character, with a perfect pivot from in Cat's shadow to becoming a man of his own. He was the button that EE could press to ignore all of the logistical issues when the army got big, so that was kind of annoying, but whatever.

Indrani. Around the time that she and Cat finally fucked I was screaming in my head for them to fuck, so that feels right. Really liked her characterization towards the end with the other Refuge refugees, especially the line where Concocter tells her it didn't have to always be a fight. Good shit.

Vivienne was hit or miss for me, she was her own character, but never really felt that important to me, despite obvious narrative importance. Never the same level of emotional connection to me.

Masego, my darling beloved. My sweet perfect boy. My autistic wizard son. I love him. There may be flaws in his character, maybe, but I will never see them. He is the platonic ideal of a wizard to me.

And then Catherine. She went though so many forms of anime magic. Guide truly cemented itself as a shonen to me, just by virtue of never quite knowing what she could actually do. Her characterizations were relatively constant, enough to ground her as a character anyway, but the way that she always had a hidden plan did get a little annoying. It wasn't quite Sherlock Holmes level unrevealed scheming, but there were definitely moments where I groaned out of annoyance, namely when she was take prisoner in Wolof. I'm probably overstating how much wasn't foreshadowed, and I'd guess that for a lot of people the excitement of guessing "how would Cat get out of this one" was fun, but by the end I was rolling my eyes half the time.

Overall I loved it, and I'm definitely going to reread it at some point. It will provide inspiration for my dnd campaign for years to come, and I will be shamelessly stealing characters forever. Kairos Theodosian was incredible, and probably my second favorite character.

My single biggest critique was that there were stretches of like 5 or 6 interludes in a row, which inevitably lead to me saying "Cordelia FUCKING Hasenbach" under my breath

[kvothbloodless]

You ever wish you were back in middle school english class so you could get rewarded for writing essays about random books?

Anyways Im rereading the three Crabs in a Bucket scenes from guide and just. Jesus christ is Cordelia Hasenbach a dumb hypocrite.

[booksandchainmail]

Before the hour had passed Salia was a city-wide riot. The Dread Empire was blamed, but there was talk of there being traitors in the Highest Assembly that had helped the easterners. [...] And so when the First Prince of Procer entered the Chamber of Assembly, her torso bandaged more for effect than out of need, it was to silence. Every whisper had died the moment she came into the hall. There was still one of them missing, for Princess Adeline of Orne had been unfortunately delayed after she was thrown by her horse, but the session began without her. “As First Prince of Procer,” Cordelia Hasenbach said, “I declare that every vote held this evening will be entered into the formal public record.” It was the Alamans here who first understood the threat, not her own countrymen or the Arlesites. It had always been the people of the lakes, of the heartlands of Procer, who best understood the weight the opinions of the people carried. It fell into place, after that, one stroke at a time. Prince Salazar of Valencis brought forth the accusation of treason against Princess Adeline, making the faces of more than a few conspirators pale in dread. Evidence was brought out, mere technicalities – movement of troops through the territory of another prince without explicit permission, an act of war under ancient laws, and the hiring away of fantassins already in the service of another without reparations being offered – but enough that the legal requirements were met. These were, every soul in this room understood, almost laughable charges. Only a First Prince with unshakable support in the Highest Assembly, with power and influence at their zenith, might feasibly attempt such a transparent ploy without being run out of the Chamber. And still, after the evidence was laid out, only silence followed. And in that silence the howls of the people echoed loudly, the riots that had yet to end. Cordelia Hasenbach watched the Highest Assembly with cold eyes. Which of you, she asked them silently, wants to be known to the mob as the traitor that helped shelter treason? Which of you wants to be known on every whisper as the Praesi hireling, as the turncoat that bickered with the First Prince of Procer while her breast was still bloodied? Princess Adeline of Orne stormed into the Chamber but moments later, unannounced by heralds, but before she could so much as speak a word Cordelia Hasenbach addressed the Highest Assembly. “I now call for the vote on the charges of treason laid against Adeline Sauveterre, Princess of Orne,” the First Prince calmly said, voice echoing across the hall. One after another the votes came, and Adeline went from mocking to defiant to deflated and finally to shaking. Falling on her knees. She was condemned unanimously. “See her out,” Cordelia ordered the guards. She called the vote on the provisional superintendence, then, and after not a word of debate it passed unanimously. She saw then in their eyes the belief that it was done, that they were free of this drumming. Cordelia Hasenbach did not free them. Instead she called for a vote on the repeal of the law preventing magicians from taking oaths under the auspices of the House of Light. By midnight, she had passed every single reform she had ever wanted to pass.

- Extra Chapter: Grand, from A Practical Guide to Evil by erraticerrata

My toxic trait is that despite being a strong believer in egalitarianism and the rule of law irl, I really like when fictional despots like Lord Vetinari or Princess Bubblegum turn to the villain and say “this isn’t a democracy you absolute fucking imbecile.”

[gwennafran]

A Practical Guide to Evil fanart. - Journey to Serolen.

It's been a bit since I've made horses. Have some horses.

A fun fact about riding dresses: There's really no trick to them. It's just a dress that you ride in. They don't magically make it easier for you to ride on a horse in a dress. And the proper way to ride in a long riding dress if you're a noble lady, is to ride in a side saddle, rather than riding astride.

Let's face it. We all know both Akua Sahelian and Cordelia Hasenbach are the exact sort of absolutely insane, to take a month long trip riding in the most impractical way possible, merely because that's what you do when riding while wearing long pretty dresses.

Rank among the members of this journey, as perceived by the horses. Top to bottom.

The scary small two-legged female that's ordering the monster around.

The tall dark two-legged female that also seem to have a bit of control over the monster.

The winged monster.

The tall pale two-legged female ordering the big one around.

The big horse.

The pretty drama queen horse.

The nice calm horse.

The tall dark two-legged male that's being ordered around even by the nice calm horse. That benevolently doesn't throw him off it's back all the time.

[lilietsblog]

He’d known there was a reason he liked the woman. She had a good head on her shoulders, to wish the opposite of him.

I’m fucking crying.

I really hope Amadeus gets to actually chat with Cordelia sometime, it’s going to inevitably be the best. Like, Cat’s actually a diplomat, plays those games when it’s appropriate, but Amadeus does not indulge even for a moment <3

[austinramsaygames]

A Practical Guide To Evil is the first story that I have ever gone to AO3 for because I was hoping to see if one particular detail in the epilogue got fleshed out by an enterprising fan. Unfortunately nothing there matched my idea (That Cordelia Hasenbach may have been Catherine's longest romantic relationship and the whole thing happens off screen in the epilogue), but I did find several fanfics that look fun!

I have now finished A Practical Guide To Evil and I loved it! Cried a few times through the course of it, and laughed plenty. The last few chapters and the epilogue REALLY hit me though. Basically spent the entire time reading the epilogue crying except for the few blessed comedy bits in it for respite.

I highly recommend reading it if you want a fantasy story about heroes, villains, and the stories that propel them.

Side note: for those it's important to there are multiple queer characters of many different types, one of the main cast is clearly autistic, and several characters are disabled. All of the above get to be awesome at various times. The story is not about any of the above but they're nice touches.

[quotes-from-the-bookery]

A flick and the coin went spinning, up and up and up. Cordelia’s hand moved quicker than her mind, than her flesh, and she snatched it out of the air. It burned against her palm, scorching. She swallowed the pain.

“Enough,” the First Prince of Procer said. “There will be no killing.”

The Chosen was watching her with wide eyes, before something like surprise and awe flickered across his face.

“You are…” he said, sounding moved. “I have never seen it with my own eyes.”

And she felt it too, pulsing through her veins, the mantle that was within her reach. His judgement she had ended for there was only one fit to pass it in these chambers, and it was the Warden of the West. Even the burning against her palm seemed distant, like her flesh was being filled with something – no. No. She fought the pull, the inevitability, everything it entailed. She fought it tooth and nail. There was nothing greater than this, this flesh, this moment and this place and the laws that bound them all. She had only one master, and it was the Principate of Procer. The coin burned into her flesh and she cast it down. The White Knight’s face went ashen.

“This is,” Cordelia said, “the Principate of Procer. We rule with accord and law, we mete out the same justice to the highest soul and the lowest. We fail that principle, often and utterly, as men and women have failed principles since the First Dawn. But I will not renounce it: not for a day, not for an hour, nor for a single breath. This land will know no queen, no empress, no pale-clad warden to stand above all others.”

In her palm the laurels had been burned black, a wound she knew would never heal so long as she lived.

“Conspiracy will be tried by our laws,” Cordelia Hasenbach. “And no one else’s.”

She could be the law, the First Prince knew. After this, looking in the eyes of those around her, seeing the loyalty that was blooming there. The faith. She could take it, and First Prince or not she would be the only law Procer would need. With scheme and knife, with ruthless will, she could purge the rot and turn Procer into what it should be instead of… this. No, Cordelia thought once more, and this time it was barely a struggle at all.

She returned to her throne, and the moment she sat the conspiracy was finished.

[stinkybreath]

I knew Cordelia Hasenbach. I’d known her as my opponent and then as my ally, and now I thought I might be coming to know her as a friend. And the woman who’d sat across me in Serolen, who’d called me vicious but meant it as a compliment, I trusted her. Either too much or not enough, I thought, but still I trusted her.

imagine reading this to early guide Catherine

[triviallytrue]

Cordelia Hasenbach taking the legislative reform any% speedrun

[disgruntled-foreign-patriarch]

Cordelia Hasenbach

AgnessBlanvradica on DeviantArt

[gwennafran]

Cordelia clothing layers. (A practical Guide to Evil fanart)

Honestly, this one is all for me, and I geeked out. So, first of all, this is fantasy. I combined a lot of different historical inspirations from approximately the same century, to get the look I wanted.

This is roughly based on elements from Saxon Cranach dresses from between 1510 and 1540, as well as some Tudor and Elizabethan inspirations taken from around 1530 to 1580. The stay in particular is from the later part of the 16th century. Seeing how we know from Hakram’s excellent reading choices Procerans uses corsets – but everything else about them scream Renaissance inspiration – I figured we’d be talking early stays, that still are well within the Renaissance setting. Rather than much later Victorian corsets.

The ruffled petticoat might actually be the biggest historical deviation away from the general time period used for inspiration. They had petticoats around that century, but not with the ruffles. It just seemed so very, very Proceran. So yeah, one of biggest fantasy part in this due to being very out of time: The fluffy ruffled petticoat! Totally on par with the rest of Guide where one of the most modern parts also is the lace panties. ;)

More geeking out beneath the cut

1. Chemise and stockings. The stockings would be made from very finely knitted silk. Much more comfortable than is you sew stockings from fabric. The go above the knees and are fastened with lace garters.

Not pointed out on the image is the ratling tooth bracelet given to Cordelia by Friedrich Papenheim when she was quite young. In fact, she was so young it probably is a bit too small for her wrist now. Digging into it beneath her fancy sleeves.

2. Stays or corsets was used for quite a few centuries with very different goals. The early stays actually was not trying to give you a sexy hourglass figure. Rather the opposite, really. They worked to flatted out your chest into an – at the time extremely fashionable - cone shape. Body ideals change a lot in fashion…

3. I took a vote on Discord if Cordelia should be in white or blue. 3 voted for white. 13 for blue. And a couple of wonderfully mad souls started to argue for pastel pink to match Cat’s soon to be pastel fashion choices. These pink bows are for you lot. They may be hidden, but they’re there.

4. Lower dress and letter. Well, technically the letter from Friedrich Papenheim goes between the stay and the lower dress (called a kirtle). I figured it’d be much safer between these two pretty even and stiff layers, than if it went under the stay. Not sure what Cordelia is going to do now that she has two letters that are extremely near and dear to her. Double up on letters worn over her heart? Also, honestly Cordelia, you’re a weird and non-fashionable item short from Friedrich to form a proper rule of three.

5. Gown: If you look very closely, the bracelet is still just visible from beneath a sleeve.

6. Finishing touches: So yeah, the front part of the gown being pinned in place with needles is not something I’m making up. Someone not familiar with this style of fashion is in for a potentially pointy surprise if making a successful pass at a Proceran noble lady.

[gwennafran]

A Practical Guide to Evil relevant Book 7 chapter joke. 

[kvothbloodless]

This is so funny ive been saying "Cordelia MOTHERFUCKING Hasenbach" for Years, but like. As a positive.

Anyways, also totally agree. Vivienne just...never really mattered to me, which is weird since her character arc is objectively very well written.

A Practical Guide to Evil

So I've sat with it for most of the day, and while I think I'll be ruminating on it for much longer than that, here are my thoughts.

Obviously, spoilers.

First, Akua Sahelian. Even going in knowing that she was going to get a redemption arc, I was thinking that maybe I misremembered the name, that it was another character that was going to be redeemed. Especially after the demon at Marchford and of course the Doom of Liesse. I will admit to literally squealing when Catherine broke her fucking bones after 1st Liesse. As the story went on, I began to forgive and forget, and to be honest by the middle of Vol. 7 I was like get over it and kiss her, Cat. I guess I just never felt that bad about the Doom after the Everdark, despite the narrative's insistence on reminding me of it. Maybe that's good writing, that I liked Akua so much, maybe not, idk I'm just a little guy.

Hakram was a great character, with a perfect pivot from in Cat's shadow to becoming a man of his own. He was the button that EE could press to ignore all of the logistical issues when the army got big, so that was kind of annoying, but whatever.

Indrani. Around the time that she and Cat finally fucked I was screaming in my head for them to fuck, so that feels right. Really liked her characterization towards the end with the other Refuge refugees, especially the line where Concocter tells her it didn't have to always be a fight. Good shit.

Vivienne was hit or miss for me, she was her own character, but never really felt that important to me, despite obvious narrative importance. Never the same level of emotional connection to me.

Masego, my darling beloved. My sweet perfect boy. My autistic wizard son. I love him. There may be flaws in his character, maybe, but I will never see them. He is the platonic ideal of a wizard to me.

And then Catherine. She went though so many forms of anime magic. Guide truly cemented itself as a shonen to me, just by virtue of never quite knowing what she could actually do. Her characterizations were relatively constant, enough to ground her as a character anyway, but the way that she always had a hidden plan did get a little annoying. It wasn't quite Sherlock Holmes level unrevealed scheming, but there were definitely moments where I groaned out of annoyance, namely when she was take prisoner in Wolof. I'm probably overstating how much wasn't foreshadowed, and I'd guess that for a lot of people the excitement of guessing "how would Cat get out of this one" was fun, but by the end I was rolling my eyes half the time.

Overall I loved it, and I'm definitely going to reread it at some point. It will provide inspiration for my dnd campaign for years to come, and I will be shamelessly stealing characters forever. Kairos Theodosian was incredible, and probably my second favorite character.

My single biggest critique was that there were stretches of like 5 or 6 interludes in a row, which inevitably lead to me saying "Cordelia FUCKING Hasenbach" under my breath

[gwennafran]

Comment on what technically still is the latest A Practical Guide to Evil chapter.

Hanno is still missing his plate armor and is left half naked, right?

You gotta give Cordelia credit for ignoring that.