#Cop!eddie x doctor!buck

[diazheartsbuckley]

Hiiiii, I’ll start with 🚨 🚨 🚨

Hiya Hippo 🫶🏻

🚨🚨🚨🚨

“I’m sorry, Buck. I-I didn’t know” Eddie apologizes like that’s magically going to fix Buck’s trust in him.

Buck sighs as he drops down in the couch, unable to settle his gaze and he shifts a few times before deciding to get back up. He paces around the room, almost dragging his feet and he stops three feet from Eddie. He wants to reach out and touch his boyfriend but he’s way too angry to act on it. “You don’t get to do that, you don’t get to just go digging in my life because you’re not comfortable with something” Buck says, feeling his heart and thoughts racing.

This is always what happens. He starts to let people into his life and as soon as they see that he’s damaged goods, that he doesn’t know how to deal with the things that happened to him in the past, they run. When they see that he doesn’t know how to talk about it, that they sense that he doesn’t trust them, that his head isn’t completely in the relationship, they run. When they see him reacting in a certain way, when they see him being unable to feel at ease and when they see him being insecure, they run.

And he doesn’t want Eddie to run.

Make me write ✍🏻

And ofc a tag for the wifey @tizniz 😘

[alexandrianicolegrey-oc]

Abducted

A Buck x GenderNeutral!Reader Imagine

Angst, Hurt/Trauma, Fluff, Healing

Taglist:

@nurse-buckley

@angel-malaki-morningstar

@mrspeacem1nusone

@caitsymichelle13

Imagine: The day you went missing, was the day that everything changed for Buck. He and Athena would stop at nothing to bring you home after your abusive ex boyfriend kidnapped you. They both spent the last several days searching the state of California for you.

Two weeks had long passed. Buck was sitting in the hospital next to Eddie who was trying to calm Buck down. But Eddie then let it slip that your abusive ex had been the one who befriended Eddie just to get to you and had betrayed him. Which is why he ended up in the hospital.

Athena got word that you had been spotted at a retreat about 280 miles North of Los Angeles. So, they headed there. But they were not dressed for the snow or the cold. Buck didn't care as long as he got to you in time to save you. You were his main focus.

The search and rescue were there, cops were spread out looking as well, Athena asked questions and searched the cabin where you had been spotted last.

"Hey! We got blood!" One of the rescues yelled out.

Buck took off before Athena could stop him. He ran down the sidewalk and jumped into the snow while searching the open area for you. He screamed your name hoping you could hear him.

You rounded the corner, bleeding, covered in bruises and cuts, limping, and your clothes were torn. As you turned the corner, you saw Buck through your blurry vision. Tears streamed your bruised face. "Buck? Buck!!!" You called out as you made your way towards him.

Buck caught you just as you collapsed against him. "Is it over?! Is it!-" You sobbed into his chest, unable to finish your words. "Yes, yes it's over, Y/N. I got you." Buck whispered, holding you against him. Buck didn't care about the blood soaked shirt of his. All that he cared about was that you were alive and that he found you. He held you close as your body trembled. Athena called for a med chopper to get you lifted out of there.

Of course, the 118 crew was so relieved to hear that you were alive. Buck's sister could totally feel your pain, having been through a similar situation herself, a few years back with her deceased, ex husband She was also happy that you were alive. She was happy for Buck too.

At the hospital, you were treated for cracked ribs and a concussion. You wounds were cleaned up and the doctor prescribed you pain medicine. But you also had to undergo treatment for your mental health after the trauma you went through.

When you returned home, Buck stayed with you no matter what. When Buck had to work, you stayed with Carla and Chris. Eddie had made sure that you were safe. He still blamed himself for letting your ex mess with his head. You did try to get him to stop beating himself up over the situation because he didn't know. And you told him that you were not mad at him.

Buck never gave up looking for you. He knew deep down inside, that you were the best thing to ever come into his life. Between Eddie and Chris, the 118 family, Maddie, and everyone he loved, he would stop at nothing to keep you safe and that is what he intended to do.

For some reason, none of my posts are wanting to post. I keep having to rewrite them over and over again despite having them saved. Anyways, headcannons will be coming soon. I hope. With the bad weather we are getting, internet keeps going in and out so posts will have to wait until tomorrow. But I can RP with anyone using my phone if anyone want to RP. Just message me or shoot me an ASK.

[softbuckismykink]

Like a Stranger (Finally Found)

X-posted on AO3

Summary:

Evan Buckley never wanted to be a guide. Opening up empathically fucks you up. It happened to his Dad, it happened to Maddie’s ex. That’s why he chose to be numb. And he’s doing well up until for some reason their Captain decided they need another member of the team. Something is wrong with that Diaz guy. Buck is not sure what but the moment he laid eyes on the guy, there a strange feeling blooming in his chest. It must be loathing he decided. Because anything else would mean his empathic suppressants are failing and he can’t have that.

Eddie Diaz figured if throwing himself in a literal war didn’t activate his sentinel genes then there’s a high chance that it will never happen and he made peace with that fact. That’s why he moved to LA with his kid, less people knowing he’s that Diaz. The one who did not live up to the family legacy. Everything is going so well until he joined 118 and met Buck, the cute young firefighter who without a doubt hates his guts, which is really annoying Eddie because he can’t seem to find it in him to hate the guy back because every time Eddie looks at him he can’t shake this feeling that he finally found home.

Notes: Okay before you start reading please be warned that I'm a slow writer with so read at your own risk. I might update this tomorrow or it might take me a while to do it. Also this is not the fic that I'm supposed to post today but I'm not done with my firstson!Buck AU yet so here's another fic instead.

Chapter 1: What is this Feeling?

“I looked at him like a stranger, someone I’d never seen before, and he looked at me like I’d been lost to him for a thousand years and finally found.”

― Emme Rollins

*****

Evan Buckley never wanted to be a guide. Because in his experience nothing ever good happens to guides. Opening up empathically fucks you up. It happened to his Dad, it happened to Maddie’s ex, Doug. Guides equals crazy as far as Buck was concerned.

His dad was a good father up until Buck was ten and his father came online after meeting his Sentinel. After that the guide center had his father sequestered in the facility for months. And when he finally was allowed to get out six months later it was to serve his high school sweetheart and wife of eighteen years divorce papers to sign.

Doug Kendall on the hand seemed like a nice guy, at first. Doctor, rich but unassuming. Then he’ll start to open his mouth and you’d know something’s not right with the guy. Buck met Doug well Doug was already an online guide so he’s pretty much already a douchebag when he met him, and maybe that’s just Doug being Doug but Buck can’t help but think Doug is the way he is because guide instincts fucked him up.

Buck was thirteen when he started feeling emotions that he knew are not his own. He’s feeling so much anger at being betrayed, emotions that he suspected came from his mother, because that was after his dad served her the divorced papers.  Buck was afraid of being taken away from his family, from his mother and sister Maddie; like what happened to his dad. That’s why he hid. He pretended not to feel other people’s emotions even if it’s suffocating him.  

Buck decided he won’t end up like Doug or his Dad. So Buck played dumb for the sentinel and guide pair that evaluated him in senior year in high school.  It was a standard screening interview that all seniors went through to determine whether they have either a sentinel or guide traits. Fortunately, he was able to fool them. The Sentinel and Guide Center were looking for potential sentinels/guides not completely online ones. Buck had developed a fool proof idiot façade to hide the fact that he’s an online guide. Back then there’s no DNA testing for it, since scientists have yet to isolate the SgA series gene, so it’s easier to skate by.  

By the time they had a more sophisticated way of screening for sentinel and guide genes, Buck managed to escape to South America to avoid detection. There he was introduced to a more effective way of hiding his guide nature: suppressant drugs, specifically, Emphazepam, or as the locals call it “Amansalocos” literally means “to tame the craziness” because that’s what guide instincts are, a bunch of crazy fucked up compulsions.

When Buck tried amansalocos, he felt absolute relief. Like he got so used to the noise that when it suddenly stop he felt overwhelmingly light. Gone were the suffocating feelings that bombarded him constantly. So Buck chose to drug himself up. Amansalocos are highly illegal in the US but Buck managed to find a discreet supplier by the time he moved back home. With the steady supply of guide suppressants, he’s able to go undetected by even the sharpest and skilled sentinel.

The only downside (because of course there’s a downside there’s always price to pay) of the drug was it while it shut down his psi receptors so he wouldn’t feel other people’s emotions, it also affects is own psi channels enough that he could barely recognize his own emotions. But Buck didn’t care about that, doesn’t need emotions. He is not like the typical guide who chose a job that needs them to use their abilities like a teaching or nursing. He chose to be a firefighter because it's easily the most unlikely job an omega would have. No need to use guide instincts, see the fire, put out the fire the rest is blah, blah. Or so he thought.

Sometimes he could feel an itch that needs to be scratched but pretty soon he figured a cure for that too. Sex. Lots of fucking sex. Buck doesn’t even care who with, he barely feels attraction anymore, so he’d have sex with anyone willing to do it with him. Sex allows him to feel pleasure despite his dull sensibilities. When ever someone touch him, kiss him, fuck him, Buck swears he could feel someone else's emotions echo in him. It's euphoric, that kind of feeling. So it really isn't surprising that Buck got addicted to it. He craves sex so much that it almost cost him his job as a firefighter. If it wasn't for Athena, a cop he used clash with on scenes, vouching for him and his abilities as a firefighter, he would have. So he vowed to himself that he'd keep his addiction separate from his work. And he managed to trudge on long shifts despite the cravings.

Then he met Abby and for the first time he wanted to feel something more than the dull fleeting intimacy his one night stands provide. Because he can see she’s special lady and she makes him feel safe and curious about life. For the very first time in his life he felt inadequate. For the first time felt that his inability to feel emotions a burden rather than a relief.

Buck thought about going off his guide suppressants for her.  She’s not a sentinel and she won’t be able to shield him from the suffocating feeling that would descend upon him the moment the suppressants wash out of his system but Buck thinks she deserves that kind of sacrifice, she deserves Buck being truthful to her.  It’s a  big risk though and he needs to think long and hard if he’s really ready for it. He tried skipping some doses, not long enough for the drugs to wash out his system, but long enough to have some of the effects wear off. Just long enough to test the waters so to speak.

Going off suppressants felt weird at first. Then it got worse. He soon realized that while he can manage being off suppressants while at home with Abby, working without suppressants is a freaking torture. He didn’t even manage to last one call. There car accident involving multiple vehicles, no one was seriously injured but still people’s emotions during an emergency situation like that can ran high and for an untrained guide empath it can be a torture. The moment Buck step into the scene he got knocked by wave of emotions it took him a while get his bearing. Thank god he managed to bring with him an emergency dose of empazepam. He dry swallowed the pill and luckily for him it takes only a few minutes for it to take effect. So he decided to keep taking the suppressants but maybe he could skip when he’s with Abby.

His new found system worked fine. He’s having an even more meaningful relationship with Abby. Then Abby’s mom died and by god Buck could feel the grief like it was his own. He tried to comfort her even though being around her and her grief is suffocating him. Buck thinks he owes her at least that much. Slowly they both heal. Though soon enough Buck felt Abby slowly pulling away. He might have only a bit of empathy left in him but he thinks even a mundane can sense when someone is on the verge of letting go.

Buck wanted to ignore it, wanted to just cling on to Abby tight. Because she’s the one thing, the one proof he could show the world, his friends, that he is not just Buck anymore, that he has a life beyond the confines of station 118. But reality is that Abby is an independent woman who is ready and eager to go out and discover the world. She won’t let anything or anyone stop her from going after what she wants. And Buck just wants her to be happy, so he said he’ll support her in whatever she wanted to do.

So the next thing Buck knew she already has her foot out the door, she said she’s leaving to find herself. But the end result is still the same though, he’s being left behind. Intellectually he knew Abby needs this, and that’s why he put up a brave front. He escorted her to the airport himself, when even letting her out of his sight hurts him. He just hopes she finds herself soon and comes back to him. Cause she'll come back, Buck will just have to wait.

He’s doing well up until for some reason their Captain decided they need another member of the team.

It was one of those days that he's looking for the slightest positive thing in his life to keep him going cause it feels like crumbling around him but he still needs to keep his head up because the team needs him to be functional. He knows that as much as he needs the team to be okay and happy, that they need him to be okay and happy too. He can't show up to work despondent and sluggish, because while the drugs suppresses his ability to feel other people's emotion it only marginally suppress his ability to project his own unto others. He knew from experience that him showing up with less than his usual cheery self would basically trigger foul moods amongst his colleagues.

Luckily for Buck, he has one thing that is going good today that he could focus on. He finally reached his weight goal and just in time for the submissions for the Hot Days, Smoldering Nights: Men of the LAFD wall calendar. So he came in to start his shift with a grin on his face like always, and goes on to brag about his achievements to his team, which he kind of knew they would just laugh at but exactly why Buck is acting like the way he is to keep the team's spirits up. Buck is reveling at his success in spreading joy to the team when Chim started to look past him to the locker room behind him.

"Okay, That is a beautiful man."

"Where's the lie? And I like girls."

“Who the hell is that?” Buck asked frown beginning to form.

“It's Eddie Diaz. New recruit. Graduated top of his class just this week. Guys over at Station Six were dying to have him, but I convinced him to join us.”

“What do we need him for?”

“He served multiple tours in Afghanistan as an Army medic. Guy's got a Silver Star.” So the guy’s a super star then, Buck’s not liking where this is going already. “Plus he’s a latent sentinel. It's not like he's wet behind the ears.”

Fuck really a sentinel, just what Buck needs.   Not.   This is bad. Sure Diaz is latent but Buck avoids sentinels for a reason. The fact that they are all (yes even his sister Maddie) sanctimonious know-it-alls. The only sentinel Buck was able to tolerate was his sister and that’s because he loves her and she took care of him when their parents practically bailed out on them. All sentinels are pretty much smug bastards, in Buck’s opinion. They get away with pretty much everything because of their so called talents. Even as a latent they get privileges of an active Sentinel just because of a quirk in their DNA.

“Come on, I'll introduce you to him.” His captain smiled as he said, “He likes to be called Eight Pack.”

“Wow. Silver Star.” Hen whistles clearly impressed, unlike Buck who just adds to Buck's ire.

“Better drop some more body fat there, butch.” Chim teased quite rudely, which on a normal day Buck would just roll his eyes at since he kind of treats the older man like a mix of a weird uncle/annoying big brother but today it's just throwing him off for some reason and he felt hurt by Chim's harmless comments.

Buck looked towards where the rest of his team is greeting the new guy, and his frown deepened.  Something is wrong with that Diaz guy. Buck is not sure what but the moment he laid eyes on the guy, there a strange feeling blooming in his chest. It must be loathing he decided. Because anything else would mean his guide suppressants are failing and he can’t have that.

[diazheartsbuckley]

🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨 (I’m so intrigued by this one)

Hippo my darling!

Once again, I apologize for taking so long to answer 😅

Life has been throwing me some curveballs lately but here you go!

🚨🚨🚨🚨

“You know that’s not what I mean” Buck chuckles, playfully swatting Eddie’s chest. For a moment, he feels a bit uncomfortable about his feelings, about his suggestion and he knows that that’s not fair to Eddie.

But there has never been anyone who makes him feel like Eddie does. Who makes him feel safe enough to open up and who makes him happy and who makes him feel worthy of being loved by someone who isn’t his family.

“I more meant like, sitting down and having dinner with them and talking to them and not having to hide our relationship anymore. My mom has been a cop for nearly 30 years, Eddie. If I don’t tell her something concrete soon, she’ll go digging for information” Buck adds with a quick smile.

Eddie lets out a sigh that’s deeper than what he intends because he is just as nervous as Buck is about this. Buck is important to him, Buck is his first serious relationship since getting divorced and coming out as gay. Buck is everything to him and things between them have been so good lately and Eddie is afraid to mess that up.

“I know what you mean, baby. I just-… One thing is your mom approving of me as her employee, another is her being approving of me as your boyfriend. I want to meet your family, I do but…”

What if they don’t like me? What if they don’t want us to be together because of my past? What if it affects my professional relationship with your mom?

The thoughts are many but all left unsaid and Eddie drops his eyes down to his lap, feeling his grip slightly tightening on Buck’s shoulder.

“Hey, it’ll be okay. I’m nervous too, you know? And we’ll be in it together. They’re gonna love you” Buck says with a soft smile

They’ll love you because I do too. But it’s too early to tell you that.

Make me write ✍🏻

[diazheartsbuckley]

🚨⬇️

Hiya anon 💕

🚨🚨🚨🚨

“So I was thinking that maybe it’s time for you to meet my parents?” Buck says, hand firmly placed against Eddie’s chest, feeling his heartbeat beneath it. Buck has never introduced anyone to his parents before, not intentionally at least.

“Buck, your mom is my boss, I have already met her” Eddie chuckles, placing his hand on top of Buck’s.

⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️

“It’s not fair, you know?” Buck’s lips barely leaves Eddie’s as he speaks, fingertips too busy fumbling with Eddie’s shirt buttons. “You touching me and calling me ‘sweetheart’ and ‘darling’ and then you just expect me to what? Jump into bed with you because you’re a gentleman about it?”

Eddie grins against Buck’s lips, “no, I except you to jump into me because you know that I won’t be a gentleman as soon as I get you naked”

Make me write ✍🏻

[diazheartsbuckley]

🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨

Here you go my love 😘

“So if you tried to uh-..” Eddie has to pause his sentence to take it all in, to realize what Buck has just told him. He gets why he kept it to himself and he gets why this is an even deeper betrayal of Buck’s trust. And he knows how much it took for them to get to this point.

“Kill him, then why isn’t it considered attempted murder? I don’t understand this. I-…” Eddie stops himself completely from talking because he doesn’t want to make this conversation even more complicated than it already is.

Buck chews on his bottom lip, weighing his words because he has never shared this with anyone else. Only Maddie, Bobby and Athena. They were the only ones who should know about it but Eddie has become so important in his life that he wants to share that piece of his past. And parts of him also want to shut Eddie up about him not getting a gun because of his criminal record. Although right now, he isn’t sure that Eddie is still worthy of his trust because he went behind his back, behind Athena’s back and got his sealed records.

“Because my adoptive mom protected me. She had arrested me several times before that and she knew that I wasn’t safe but CPS wasn’t listening. So she uh-…” Buck says, exhaling deeply as he fiddles with his thumbs, not looking in Eddie’s direction as tears start to fall.

“She made a compelling case to the judge. I mean, not that compelling because it wasn’t considered self defense but it’s better than attempted murder. She promised the judge that I’d be her personal responsibility. And her and Bobby had recently been approved as emergency foster care providers, so they took me in and uh, they ended up adopting me even though I tried to keep them at a distance”

Make me write ✍🏻

[diazheartsbuckley]

Hiii

🏫🏫🏫, 🚨🚨🚨?

Hiya 💗

🏫🏫🏫🏫🏫

Previous snippet here

Buck wants to forget Eddie. Wants to forget every memory that they have ever made and all the ones that they never got to have because life didn't turn out in their favor. He wants, no, needs to forget the way that Eddie's lips felt on his skin, the way that Eddie loved him so effortlessly and how despite of everything, Eddie was the greatest love that he had ever known. Buck had tried to move on once he realized that Eddie was out of his life for good but no one could ever quite live up to their predecessor, Eddie's love so giving and fulfilling and beautiful and sweet. But Eddie is married now. Eddie got to create a family while Buck stayed hopelessly in love with a man that was never really his. Or he was. But Eddie was and is still afraid to show who he is. Maybe he'll never be ready. And Buck is the one who has to swallow yet another bitter pill.

🚨🚨🚨🚨

Previous snippet here

It doesn't sit right with Eddie. He shouldn't go behind Buck's back like this. Yet he manages to keep his mouth shut about it for a solid 18 hours until Buck brings up buying a gun again. Buck's head is on his shoulder and Eddie is close to sleep as Buck traces soft circles on his collarbone. Eddie lets out a long, appreciative sigh but Buck is stirring uncomfortably, making it impossible for him to fall asleep. "What's up, baby?" Buck props himself up on his elbow and Eddie slowly opens his eyes, draping a hand on Buck's warm lower back, gently stroking the skin. "Please teach me how to use a gun. You're one of the most experienced marksmen on the force and my mom has already signed off on you teaching me. Please?" Buck bats his long lashes. "I-... I don't think that's a good idea" "You already said that. Tell me why it's such a bad idea, Eddie" Buck sits up, the duvet pooling around his naked waist. "I think you know why, Buck" "Tell me" "Because you have a history of violent crimes. I know that your record is sealed-" Eddie doesn't get to finish his sentence before Buck is out of bed and getting dressed, his facial expression burning with anger and hatred. "You asshole!" Buck throws Eddie's shirt harshly in his face. "You went through my fucking file? Even after I told you not to? Get the hell out of my apartment!" "Buck..." "Get out!"

Make me write ✍🏻

[diazheartsbuckley]

Hi Maya! 🥰

It's so tough to choose!! How about...

⚡⚡⚡

🚨🚨🚨

⛪⛪⛪

🚫🚫🚫

Happy writing!!

Hiya 💕💕

Find the snippets below the cut 😘

⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️

“Buck, I am your best friend! And-and-and when I saw you hanging off that ladder, I thought you were gone forever. I felt…” Eddie exhales sharply, glancing down at his hands. “I counted every single second that your heart wasn’t beating. I-..” Eddie swallows dryly, feeling his heart pounding against his ribs. “And I knew that I had to tell you. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if you died and I didn’t tell you how I feel. You’ve had so many close calls, Buck. We have had so many close calls and you can-… you can use this information however you want but now you know. Now it’s out there and I can’t take it back, so if you don’t feel the same, just tell me now, so I can move on and we can stay friends” Buck takes a few moments to gather his thoughts because he knows exactly how he feels. But he isn’t sure that he’ll ever be enough for Eddie. And Eddie takes his hesitation as an answer. “Alright, good talk” Eddie mumbles and takes a few quick strides towards the door but not before Buck catches up with him, stepping him in front of him and putting his hands on his chest.

🚨🚨🚨🚨

“Isn’t it true that just a few days before this, you and your boyfriend, Doctor Buckley, witnessed an accident casued by the suspect?" The Internal Affairs agent questions. “I didn’t do anything wrong. I was doing my job, protecting an innocent civilian, a young girl” “The suspect’s daughter” “Yes” “Can you tell us more about the accident?” The agent continues to press Eddie and he exhales deeply, shaking his head a little. “It’s all in my report” Eddie says in between gritted teeth, feeling every muscle in his body tensing up. “Yes, but I’d like to hear it directly from you. Perhaps what happened that night clouded your judgment and caused you to act irrationally, officer. It’s pertinent to the case and the future of your career”

⛪⛪⛪⛪

This is his least favorite part about all of this. Having to hurt others in order to keep them in line. He knows that it needs to be done but that doesn’t mean that he cares for it. As the city lights pass him by, he exhales deeply and wishes that his life wasn’t like this, that he wasn’t some two-faced man who has to hide parts of himself. That he wasn’t the son of a cop killer. As his driver pulls up to what looks like an abandoned warehouse, bright spotlights are turned on and a man with a semi-automatic weapon weasels his way out of the shadows. Buck recognizes him, his unique tattoo, and his slightly impaired walk caused by a bullet years prior. “Tell Alonso that I’m here to speak to him. And that he needs to get his ass out here in a hurry” Buck says as he rolls the window down, not looking at the man for a single second longer than necessary. The man scurries back into the darkness and it doesn’t take more than a minute before he returns, another man right on his heels and Buck opens the door, allowing him to slide in.

🚫🚫🚫🚫

Christopher is holding onto his dad’s hand tightly up until they reach the entrance and then he starts to go off on his own within a distance that Eddie feels comfortable with. He and Buck are walking next to each other, shoulders bumping against one another with almost every single step they take and neither of them says anything until Buck breaks the silence. “You still aren’t sleeping, are you?” He asks carefully, eyes wandering to Eddie and then to Christopher who is having the time of his life. “I don’t want to talk about that right now, Buck. Please, not here” “Well, now is the perfect time because you can’t run away from my questions” Buck says and Eddie stops in his tracks for a moment before he starts walking again, his jaw lightly clenched. He puts his hands in his pockets, keeping his eyes locked on his son rather than at Buck.

Make me write part 1

& part 2 ✍🏻

Tag for the wifey @tizniz 💗

[diazheartsbuckley]

🚨 🚨 🚨

So I got a few people who requested this and im so excited to reignite the passion I have for this story so im gonna give you a little bit more than a few sentences 🥹

🚨Cop!Eddie x Doctor!Buck au (where Bobby and Athena are Buck’s adoptive parents)

TW!! Mentions of gun violence

Buck leans back against Eddie’s desk, arms folded tightly across his chest and his lips curls into a straight line as he waits for his boyfriend to finish the last of his paperwork.

Ever since the shooting at the hospital, Buck had felt extremely uncomfortable and anxious, crawling out of his skin at the slightest bit of loud and sudden noise. And a heavy door slamming shut in the distance raises his pulse almost instantly, his entire body flinching and he swallows harshly, trying to swallow down the tears that were forming in his eyes. He didn’t even feel safe in a police station, surrounding by armed police officers. He didn’t even feel safe next to his boyfriend. Buck barely had time to digest that thought, Eddie’s hand gently made its way onto his lower back.

Buck also hadn’t been back to work yet. He tried. He even tried more than once but all he could think about was seeing several of his friends and colleagues lying dead on the ground in a blood of their own blood. He had known some of these people since med school and now they were just…gone. And despite the fact that he had seen people die before, it had never been like this. And he had never held a dying coworker in his arms, begging him to help her. Molly is-…was his friend. And he could feel the weight of her dead against his when he woke up in the middle of the night. He could feel and see his white coat being soaked in a loved one’s blood.

“Hey. You wanna go?” Eddie says gently, noting Buck’s heavy breaths and far off stare.

“Maybe I should get a gun” Buck turns to look at him. Maybe it doesn’t make sense. Maybe he shouldn’t get a gun but it’s the first thing that comes to mind.

Eddie blinks a few times as he stands up, searching Buck’s eyes for an explanation that never comes. “Buck, that’s not a good idea. The last thing this city needs is more guns in the hands of untrained civilians” Eddie tries to reason.

“But you could teach me, right? You’re an instructor” Buck points out.

Eddie wants to argue with Buck’s logic but he’s also right. He is certified as an instructor. But Eddie has to put his foot down even though he hates it. He knew that Buck was scared. He knew that he was barely eating or sleeping, even after seeing a psychiatrist. But this wouldn’t help at all.

“I could” Eddie takes a deep breath in before he continues. “But I’m not going to. I know you’re scared, I know that you feel helpless-…”

He doesn’t get to finish his sentence before Buck cuts into the middle of it. “Then help me!” It comes out louder than anticipated and has a few of the surrounding officers looking at them. “Help me, Eddie. Please, I-I-I can’t spend the rest of my life feeling like this” Buck’s bottom lip quivers as he speaks but he doesn’t care who can see or hear him.

He needs this.

He needs to feel safe again.

He needs to be able to protect himself and his friends and coworkers.

He needs to not feel like a nine-year old defenseless kid again.

He needs to not feel scared ever again.

Make me write ✍️

Using this as my tease tidbit tuesday (even tho it’s technically wednesday here 🤫)

Some of y’all also requested it in my asks so consider this your tag for both the story and ttt/wip wednesday 🥰

Tagged by @wikiangela @weewootruck @dangerpronebuddie @hippolotamus 💕

Tagging!! @tizniz @theotherbuckley @watchyourbuck

@honestlydarkprincess @elvensorceress @wildlife4life

@thewolvesof1998 @bidisasterevankinard @butraura

@giddyupbuck @daffi-990 @actualalligator

@actuallyitsellie @spotsandsocks @steadfastsaturnsrings

@devirnis @jeeyuns @jesuisici33

@slightlyobsessedwitheverything @fionaswhvre 🦋🩵

[diazheartsbuckley]

Hi dear!! 🩷 Glad you're back 🥰

🚨🚨🚨

🎓🎓🎓

🚫🚫🚫

It was a tough decision 😁

Hi Maggie! I'm happy to be back 💗

🚨(Cop!Eddie x Doctor!Buck au)

Previous snippet here

Eddie knows that he shouldn't go through Buck's criminal record. Especially when it's sealed. But all he wants to know is if Buck would get any trouble if he tries to go out and buy a gun. They hadn't talked about it other than in passing and Buck's demeanor had started to worry Eddie. But he also knew why. He sends in the request to access Buck's criminal record, hoping that it doesn't go to Athena because she'd probably kill him even more than Buck would. Ten minutes later, the request is approved by a name he doesn't recognize and he lets out a strained sigh as he opens up the file. Buck's rap sheet dates back to 2003. Which would make him 12 years old at the time. Breaking and entering Breaking and entering Shoplifting Shoplifting Trespassing Vandalism Petty theft Trespassing Eddie scans the file and sees nothing but misdemeanors until he reaches 2006. It stands out like a sore thumb. Or several actually. Assault with a deadly weapon Possession of an illegal weapon - switchblade Fleeing a crime scene "Fuck" Eddie breathes out almost inaudibly and drags his fingers through his hair. He knows why Buck's records got sealed - Athena and Bobby took him. But if the wrong person saw these, it could seriously backfire. And what the hell happened to Buck to make him do these things?

🎓(College professor!Eddie x student!Buck au)

Previous snippet here

"Buck, you need to take a step back," Eddie says as he pushes himself further back into his chair, trying to create even more distance between them. This cannot be happening right now. "Oh, I'm sorry, sir. Have I been a bad student? Are you going to punish me?" Buck almost purrs as he makes his way around the desk which makes Eddie jump out of his chair, standing less than a foot away from the young, blonde man. "Are you?" Buck continues, tracing the back of his hand down Eddie's cheek and down to his jaw. "Or are you just gonna let me go away unpunished?" A hand grips onto Eddie's belt, closing the distance between them. Eddie has to muster up every ounce of self-control known to man but when Buck's hand makes it to his belt buckle, a flick switches inside his head and he grips Buck's wrist tightly, ripping it off his belt. He pushes Buck up against the edge of his desk and a low yelp escapes Buck's lips which only furthers his interest. "No, I'm gonna make you beg for it, beg me to fuck you so hard that you can't remember your own name. But right now, you need to get the fuck out of my classroom" Eddie says, his lips against Buck's warm neck.

Here is 🚫

Make me write ✍🏻

[diazheartsbuckley]

Make me write ✍️

Let’s just ignore the fact that I’ve got some asks still waiting to be answered from the last time I did this (that I will definitely be getting to, dw guys!) 🤭 And that I’ve added other wip to the list 🤪

Rules: Send an ask with the emojis for the wips you want me to write! I'll share at least one sentence per wip:

⚡️ - Post-lightning strike, Eddie can’t hide his feelings any longer

👨🏽‍🦳 - Eddie discovers his first grey hair

🚨 - Cop!Eddie x Doctor!Buck

🏫 (high school emoji) - 15 years after their high school graduation, Buck and Eddie reunite

🎓 - University professor Eddie has never had a more annoying student than 22 year old Buck

⛪️ (church emoji) - Mob boss!Buck x priest!Eddie

📸 - Soldier!Eddie x war correspondent!Buck

🚫 - The insomnia fic, in which the well incident leaves Eddie unable to sleep

⬇️ - The smutty mechanic fic (what plot/just porn)

❤️‍🔥 - Bratty probie Buck meets newly appointed lieutenant Eddie

📄 - A misunderstanding sends Buck and Eddie’s marriage spiraling out of control

🖤 - Religious trauma, meeting before the 118

💀 - Major character death that leads to Buddie getting together and lots of overprotective Eddie

Tagged by @bidisasterevankinard @pirrusstuff @hippolotamus @dangerpronebuddie @cal-daisies-and-briars 🩵

Tagging!!

@tizniz @watchyourbuck @wildlife4life

@inell @spotsandsocks @giddyupbuck

@whosoldherout @steadfastsaturnsrings @diazsdimples

@exhuastedpigeon @honestlydarkprincess @jeeyuns

@jesuisici33 @ronordmann @underwaterninja13

@bucksbignaturals @bucks-daddy-issues @butraura

@kaseysgirl86-blog @extasiswings @actuallyitsellie

@bucksbirthmark @evanbegins @shitouttabuck

@thewolvesof1998 @daffi-990 @namjroon

@housewifebuck @rainbow-nerdss @theotherbuckley

@monsterrae1 @wikiangela @weewootruck @devirnis 🦋

[diazheartsbuckley]

Make me write (but I do it for real this time) ✍️

Rules: Send an ask with the emojis for the wips you want me to write! I'll share at least one sentence per wip:

⚡️ (lightning emoji) Post-lightning strike, Eddie can’t hide his feelings any longer

👨🏽‍🦳(grey hair emoji) Eddie finds his first grey hair

🚨(siren emoji) Cop!Eddie x Doctor!Buck au

🏫 (high school emoji) 15 years after graduating high school, Buck and Eddie reunite

🎓 (graduation cap emoji) University professor Eddie Diaz has never had a more annoying student than 22 year old Evan Buckley

⛪️ (church emoji) Mob boss!Buck x priest! Eddie

📸 (flashing camera emoji) Soldier!Eddie x War correspondent!Buck

🚫 (prohibited emoji) The well incident leaves Eddie unable to sleep

⬇️ (arrow down emoji) The smutty mechanic fic

❤️‍🔥(flaming heart emoji) Bratty probie Buck meets newly appointed lieutenant Eddie

📄 (document emoji) A misunderstanding has Buck and Eddie’s marriage spiraling out of control

🖤(black heart emoji) Lots of religious trauma, buddie endgame

Tagged by @pirrusstuff @cal-daisies-and-briars @wikiangela @dangerpronebuddie @bucks-daddy-issues @theotherbuckley 🥰

Tagging (some of y’all again)!! @watchyourbuck @tizniz @daffi-990 @wildlife4life @thewolvesof1998 @honestlydarkprincess @monsterrae1 @actualalligator @actuallyitsellie @spaceprincessem @spotsandsocks @whosoldherout @bucksbignaturals @bucksbirthmark @bidisasterevankinard @shitouttabuck @eowon @giddyupbuck @spagheddiediaz @jeeyuns @exhuastedpigeon @steadfastsaturnsrings @diazsdimples @babybibuck @himbobuck @hippolotamus @devirnis @namjroon @loserdiaz @elvensorceress @rogerzsteven @ronordmann @underwaterninja13 @fiona-fififi 🩵🦋

[diazheartsbuckley]

Make me write ✍🏻

Tagged by @tizniz and @cal-daisies-and-briars 💘

Rules: Send me an emoji corresponding to the WIP - as many as you want! - and I'll write 3 sentences for each emoji and share it.

I have way too many wips but I love them all so much. See them below 🫶🏻

⚡️ - Post lightning strike love confession

👨🏽‍🦳 - Eddie discovers his first grey hair

🚨 - Cop!Eddie x Doctor!Buck and Bathena canonically being bucks parents

🏫 - High school sweethearts reunited 15 years after graduation

🎓- University professor Eddie has never had a more annoying student than 22 year old Buck

⛪️ - Mob boss!Buck x priest!Eddie

📸 - Soldier!Eddie x war correspondent!Buck

🚫 - The insomnia fic

❤️‍🔥- Bratty probie Buck meets newly appointed lieutenant Eddie

⬇️ - The smutty mechanic fic

📄- A misunderstanding sends Buck and Eddie’s marriage spiraling out of control

🖤- Meeting before the 118 and religious trauma

💀 - Main character death, hurt/comfort

Np tagging 💘

@actualalligator @watchyourbuck @jeeyuns

@honestlydarkprincess @dangerpronebuddie @giddyupbuck

@bucksbignaturals @bucks-daddy-issues @wikiangela

@daffi-990 @monsterrae1 @wildlife4life

@thewolvesof1998 @spotsandsocks @hippolotamus

@epicbuddieficrecs @exhuastedpigeon @bidisasterevankinard

@theotherbuckley @eddiestummy @elvensorceress

@jesuisici33 @kitteneddiediaz @devirnis

@bucksbirthmark @princessfbi @ronordmann @inell

[diazheartsbuckley]

Make me write ✍🏻

Okay so I still have a few asks left from last time I did this and dw they’ll be answered 💗 I don't have class or work until Wednesday so hoping to get around to a bit more writing than I’ve had time for lately ☀️

This time around, I'm gonna do my top wips (based on previous requests and personal faves) instead of my uh *checks notes* 13 wips 🤣

Rules: Send me an emoji corresponding to the WIP - as many as you want! - and I'll write 3 sentences for each emoji and share it.

⛪- Priest!Eddie x Mob boss!Buck

🏫- High school sweethearts reunited 15 years after graduation

📷 - Soldier!Eddie x War correspondent!Buck

❤️‍🔥- Bratty probie Buck meets newly appointed lieutenant Eddie

🚫- The insomnia fic

🚨- Cop!Eddie x Doctor!Buck (with Bathena canonically being Buck's parents)

🖤- Meeting before the 118 and religious trauma

💀- Main character death that leads to Buddie getting together and lots of overprotective Eddie

Tagged by @tizniz @jesuisici33 and @dangerpronebuddie @rainbow-nerdss 💗

No pressure tagging 💗(lmk if you want to added or removed)

@wikiangela, @watchyourbuck, @cal-daisies-and-briars , @giddyupbuck , @exhuastedpigeon, @hippolotamus, @wildlife4life, @daffi-990, @inell, @epicbuddieficrecs, @spotsandsocks , @jeeyuns, @honestlydarkprincess, @monsterrae1, @kitteneddiediaz, @bucksbignaturals, @pirrusstuff, @elvensorceress, @thewolvesof1998, @rainbow-nerdss, @bidisasterevankinard, @actualalligator, @devirnis, @ronordmann, @theotherbuckley, @underwaterninja13