#Childhood best friend!Johnny
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diejager · 10 months ago
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Hey if your comfortable with it, could you do childhood best friend Johnny (soap) CNC?
It's totally ok if not!
Cw: Consensual non-con/CNC, DUB-CON, safe words, creampie, childhood friend!Johnny, unprotected sex, PinV, tell me if I missed any.
He smothered you, pressing you into the couch of your shared flat with sloppy kisses, his mouth finding yours over and over again despite your avoidance, turning your face away from him. You fought against him, hands pushing his chest, straining against his strength and arms wrapped around your waist, gripping onto you tightly. His arms only tightened the more you fought, twisting and turning to free yourself from him, feet hanging from his shoulder and breasts jostling from his erratic pace.
“Hang- hang on! Johnny sto-”
You couldn’t get a word out with the hard shove of his cock, body rocking back and forth. You let out a shaky moan, your body burning with how hot Johnny ran, his musk - a mix of sweat, gunpowder and soothing teakwood - clogging up your nose. It played with your mind, completely drowning you in him, you couldn’t think clearly and you couldn’t fight him. You words - complaints - were forced out as breathless whimpers, mewls and keens rather than hisses and sneers.
“Johnny!”
Your eyes rolled to the back of your head, your body growing taunt under him as you sunk your nails into his shoulders, feet kicking and hips bucking upwards. He groaned, pain and pleasure had long become one of the same in his mind, the bruises and bloody, crescent moons painting his back and shoulders, the marks of your writhing body beneath him - whether you agreed to it or not - and your pleasure drunk face.
He rutted against you, slick dripping down your ass and dirtying his navel with wet claps, splashing your cum everywhere. He drove in with sharp thrusts, feeling your walls fluttering around him as he grazed your sweet spot before hitting home, the bulbous head of his erect and engorged head tapping your cervix as often as he swallowed your cries, lips draped over you and teeth nipping at your lower lip.
Your squirming and fidgeting were a breeze to control, utilising his trained and cultured mass to hold you down and devour you with his whole being. You whined with every snap of his hips, the hard muscles of his abdomen rippling in a show of power and strength —overpowering and dominating. You were small under him (you used to stand taller than him in your early days of high school when his puberty had yet to strike, ruffling his hair and letting him hang off of you like you did as children), weak and vulnerable, something he so easily overpowered to get what he wanted.
Your lashes fluttered when you came, your pretty cunt clamping down on him as his pace stuttered, moaning lowly as a wave of undeniably strong pleasure washed over him. He kissed you then, tongue pushed down your throat, muffling the most filthy and most erotic groan you’d ever heard rumbling out of his throat. You felt heavy - tired - with his girth laying half-hard inside of you as the slit shot out ropes of cum, his thick, white load painting your walls and invading your womb.
“Colour, Bonnie lass,��� his voice was raspy, hoarse from panting and gasping, feeling the lingering pulse and twitch of your walls around him, making him throb with need. Soap’s refractory time had always been fast, as overzealous has his character, his charm and smile playing into it to woo you to love your childhood friend.
“Green,” you were no better than him, chest rising and falling with laboured breaths despite doing nothing but take his roughness, clinging onto him to press kisses to his jaw and temple, coated in salty sweat that tingled on your tongue, “Just, just give me a minute, yeah, Johnny?”
“Aye.”
Taglist: @sae1kie @yeoldedumbslut @bvxygriimes @distracteddragoness @konigsblog @havoc973 @im-making-an-effort @daisychainsinknots @0alk0msan @danielle143 @dont-mind-me-just-existing-sadly @tuttifuckinfruttifriday @kaelysian @notspiders @brokenpieces-72 @petwifed @aldis-nuts @randominstake
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Forgiveness: cbf!soap x f!reader
It's been a couple days since you and Johnny had spoken.
Neither of you knew what to say to the other. Feelings were hurt and the shame of how both of you acted stopped both of you from reaching out despite the fact that every moment you spent apart was wasting time until he had to leave.
The day before he left you went to his house. Things were quiet, unusually so, and you found him in the shed in the backyard.
He was tinkering with something. He usually did that when he was bored or when he needed to clear his mind. Before you walked in you could hear him messing with whatever he had.
He was hunched over the workbench with his back towards you. He didn't know you were there and you suddenly got cold feet.
For a split second you went to leave but stopped yourself.
“Johnny.” You said and he jumped.
“Steamin’ Jesus.” He placed his hand over his heart and looked at you. “You scared me.”
“Sorry…”
The two do you stood in front of each other without saying anything. The silence was awkward and neither of you could look at the other.
“Mam told me you got into university.” He said and you nodded, noting the shame in his voice. “I’m happy for you.”
“Thanks.”
You swallowed the lump that formed in your throat. You had a lot of time to think about what he said, about making him feel guilty for wanting to leave.
Even if you didn’t want him to go there really shouldn’t be a reason for you to make it worse for everyone. Especially after he had told you this was something really wanted to do, something that felt right to him.
“Are you really leaving?” You asked softly and he hesitated to nod.
“I’m sorry for everything I said.” He told you sincerely. “I should’ve told you when I found out.”
“I’m sorry for making you feel guilty, I never should’ve done that to you.”
The air didn’t get lighter between the two of because time was running out. There were only so many hours in a day and it was almost lunch time.
“We have the whole day.” You suggested and he perked up. “If you’re up to it.”
“I am.” He gave you a weak smile that you returned.
That was how you both ended up in the middle of nowhere. Both of you were lounging in the truck bed with a couple pillows and blankets you had brought with you.
You both hadn’t done much, only stay in each other’s presence. There wasn’t much to talk about, nothing either of you wanted to bring up, so you both laid together under the stars.
“How long are you going to be gone for?” You asked after a while.
“Couple months. Probably won’t be done until October.” He told you and you bit your lip to keep it from quivering.
You so desperately wanted to beg him to stay. You didn’t want to have to see him go and know that because of you he wouldn’t come back. But you couldn’t give him any more grief, especially when he told you how it made him feel.
You should feel happy for him, you should be happy he was going to do something he wanted but there was a big emptiness inside you.
Maybe you should’ve told him how you really felt years ago. Maybe if the two of you weren’t friends but together, then he’d stay.
“You’ll be at university…” Johnny said and you hummed.
“I’m not waiting for you.” Your words replayed in his mind since you said them and it tore him up on the inside. This was the last time he’d see you even if he had plans to come back and visit whenever he could.
If you weren’t going to be here then why would he come back? You were the only reason he’d ever think to visit, save for his mom every once in a while, but for you he had planned to come back every time he could. Without you, he didn’t really see a point in it.
You wiped a few tears from your eyes and rolled over, pulling him into a hug that he immediately returned. You pressed your head against his chest and he wrapped his arms around you tightly.
“I forgive you.” You whispered and he pressed a kiss to your head.
“I forgive you too.” He whispered back and let out a heavy sigh.
Even though he had to leave in the morning, the two of you stayed out there until dawn and watched the sunrise together.
Both of you left your childhood behind in that field. And when you watched Johnny drive away, all you could feel was nothing.
A/n: growing up sucks
Tags: Tags: @elysian0612 @cassiecasluciluce @pepsicolacoochie @hayleybarnesx @tiredmetalenthusiast
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boytearscore · 3 months ago
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reason. — johnnie guilbert.
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summary: completely unable to show your own feelings to the world after growing up being mocked by your sensitiveness and tears, you face the coldness of your best friend’s roommate (johnnie) without letting it get to you, until one day watching a movie with both, he smiled at you for the first time.
warnings: mention of anxiety, depression, past traumas, psychal abuse, daddy issues, emotional blockage, angst, comedy, strong female lead, a bit of fluffly? we’ll see. (jake as your best friend.)
author's note: i got this idea last night while listening to ''nervous'' by the neighbourhood, strongly recommend you to vibe with it when reading. don't know if it will become a series, though. i'm just testing waters for now.
it was a saturday night, you and your best friend jake were hanging out all day together but he wasn’t feeling like saying goodbye yet. so to change things up a little, he invites you to watch a movie at his house.
“before you say no…” he immediately knew why you rolled your eyes and made his best puppy face. “i got your favorite chocolate at home, a whole box. you can even pick your weird thriller movies, plus it’s way cooler to watch it using our movie room. not tryna brag though.” he laughs and purse his lips. “pretty please…?”
you sigh, giving in. jake was the only person who you would do anything for. he’s been with you through tough times just as much as you’ve been with him and that created a bond between you two that no one could break.
as you both get in the car, you start driving and a few things go through your head while jake was picking a song.
the reason why you didn’t like to hangout at his house was his roommate, johnnie. you both never got along, everything began since the first day you’ve met. you couldn’t help but notice how caring, happy, sweet and all smiles he was around everyone, but you. there’s no explanation, the moment he laid eyes on you, he did nothing but be mean and cold.
but you weren’t some sensitive girl who cries when a boy says mean things, you grew up with that your whole life. no father to rely on, mean brothers and a non confrontational mother. people used to call you ''crybaby'' and that infuriated you, they spitted mean words at your face, saying you were weak and too soft, even using psychal abuse to make you cry on purpose, so much so that you’ve just hardened with time. 
you made a promise to yourself, to be a mirror. to give people what they give you and nothing else.
and that’s exactly what you did with him as well, it seemed to be working, so you didn't really care.
johnnie was in the kitchen next to the living room, grabbing a soda when you and jake arrived. he looks over at the door as you come in, rolling his eyes at the sight of you.
“so fucking nice to see you too.” you give him the same eye roll and proceeded to enter the house, throwing yourself on the couch and letting a sigh out.
johnnie scoffs as you sit down. “how long are you staying for?” he asks, sitting on the couch in front of you and grabbing his phone. 
“want me to leave soon?” you ask him, sarcastically smiling.
“i do want you to leave soon.” he finally looks up from his phone, giving you an annoyed look and you shrug. 
“then i’m staying for a looooong time.”
johnnie just ignores your teasing tone and sips his doctor pepper.  “what exactly are you doing here, anyway?”
you didn’t feel like engaging his little back and forth thing so you just ignored his question and then turned to jake that was just laughing, used to the bickering. he didn’t mind it. it was actually entertaining to him, although he was pretty sure you both would ended up fucking at some point.
“if you sleep while we’re watching the movie i’ll draw a penis on your face.” you threatened jake with your best scary face.
he laughs even harder when you threaten him and johnnie suddenly lets out a snort, but quickly composes himself when you notice.
that surprised you, he never really was a part of conversations when you were around, only to make sarcastic comments or be mean, but this was different, however you brushed it off, it’s not like you care anyways.
“you wouldn’t dare.” jake says, raising an eyebrow at you, a smug smile still on his face.
“watch me.” you whisper to him with squinty eyes, an evil smile creeping on your lips, he just sticks his tongue out at you, jokingly rolling his eyes. 
“fine, i won’t sleep. happy?”
“we shall see, my friend.” you get up and walk towards jake grabbing his hand, the perks of having a rich best friend is that he has an entire movie room in his own house, and of course a whole box of your favorite chocolates. 
as you two start heading to the room, you can’t help but turn your head back a little, looking at johnnie.
“you coming?”
johnnie looks up from his phone, watching you walk off with jake, and is surprised when you turn to ask him if he’s coming. he stands up and puts his phone in his pocket. 
“i guess so.” he mumbles, walking behind you both. he doesn’t say anything else as you three head to the movie room.
you were the first one to enter the room, immediately sitting at the huge comfortable couch, jake was right behind you picking snacks and a soda. he throws the box of chocolates in your lap, giving you a wink and sitting next to you with a diet coke and chips in hands while johnnie got himself comfortable next to jake. you grab your phone connecting to the projector and picking the movie. it was a psychological thriller mixed with comedy, very weird and gory to say at least.
johnnie rolls his eyes as you pick the movie. “course you would pick something like that.” he mutters under his breath. jake laughs and playfully shoves him.
“c’mon, johnnie! give it a chance. thriller movies are fun.”
“you can just leave, though.” you finally reply to johnnie still eyeing the projector screen reflecting on the wall. he roll his eyes and just stays quiet while jake is still laughing. “i’ve heard there’s gross scenes, i’m so excited!” you shake jake’s arm while the movie starts, laying your head on his shoulder and eating a piece of the chocolate bar. 
johnnie groans quietly, watching the screen while trying not to look the proximity between you and his roommate. he didn’t even know why it bothered him so much. 
20 minutes of movie has passed and things already gotten weird and gross, you stared at the screen mesmerised while jake frowned with a disgusted face.
“how can you even enjoy this?” johnnie asks quietly to you, watching as a character behaves weirdly in the scene.
“aw, is that too much for you?” you stare at johnnie, doing the voice adults usually use to talk to children. “do you want me to switch to a cartoon?”
johnnie’s face turns red from embarrassment, but he hides it by rolling his eyes and leaning back into the couch, looking back at the movie.
“i can handle it just fine. i’m just saying i don’t understand how you like that crap.” he mutters, a hint of a blush still on his cheeks.
“since you wanna know so bad…” you start sipping jake’s diet coke, he gives you a dirty stare and you just laugh, proceeding to talk. “it’s not about the gore stuff, it’s about the deep meaning of it, why is the character doing that? i love to contemplate and understand their reasoning, it makes me feel connected to my human side. that’s all.”
johnnie is a bit taken back by your explanation, he honestly expected some stupid answer, not a thoughtful one. he stays quiet for a moment, thinking about what you just said.
“so…  you like these kinds of movies for philosophical reasons?” he says, trying to understand.
“precisely.” you murmur, looking at the screen again.
“reasons...” he whispers to himself lost in thoughts but the scene unfolding in front of you three made his eyes pop, the character insists to engage an “action” with a girl who’s on her period.
“aaaand that's bad timing for all the things i just said, there’s no explanation for that.” you point at the screen, laughing. “this one is just a weirdo, i guess.”
“agreed.” johnnie lets out a quiet laugh. 
johnnie’s laughter was something you’ve never heard before, and that made you smile a little but as soon as you realized it, you turn to jake biting your smile away, he looked utterly disgusted and was dramatically holding back a gag as the scene continues.
“ew, that’s disgusting.” he says, looking a little sick.
“didn’t you accidentally drink your own pee before?” you ask jake, laughing out loud.
“hey!!” jake shoves you lightly, a look of embarrassment on his face. “we promised not to talk about that again.”
johnnie lets out another low laugh, enjoying the interaction between you and his roommate.
“my bad, man.” you say acting like you regretted it. “still a sensitive topic, huh?”
“you’re an ass.” the red head boy rolls his eyes but he’s still laughing as johnnie is watching the two of you, his eyes going back and forth between you and jake, his lips curved in a small smile and you noticed right away, it wasn’t a mean one like always, it was genuine. 
“hey…” you smile at him, not resisting his sudden cuteness. “for someone mean as hell you kind of know how to smile nicely.”
he looks a bit startled, not expecting you to notice his smile and actually say something about it. johnnie can feel his face heat up a bit.
“i’m not always mean, you know.” he tries to defend himself, his voice lacking the usual coldness.
this time, both of you and jake stare at him with a “really?” face. 
“not always around other people, maybe…” you say, shrugging. “to me, yes.”
johnnie’s face turns from a light shade of pink to completely red. he stutters, trying to think of a good comeback but fails, just sitting in an embarrassed silence.
the room turns quiet, just the voices of characters in the background. no one dares to speak. probably because johnnie never smiled around you before, or because you complimented him for the first time, or… because you almost told him how you feel. usually jake is the one who has to listen to you vent, not that johnnie’s behaviour actually wounded you, but because you just didn’t understand his reasons, so you finally ask him.
“why do you hate me so much?” your eyes are glued to his, not giving a fuck about the movie you were so excited to watch for ages.
johnnie suddenly feels the weight of your question hit him. he fidgets a little, feeling a mix of guilt and defensiveness rising within him. he glances at jake, hoping for him to get him out of the situation somehow, but jake just shrugs and motions for him to answer.
he takes a deep breath, his eyes locked with yours. “i… don’t really hate you.” he mutters, barely above a whisper.
you frowned confused. “then why do you act like you do?” this question wasn’t planned though, your heart spoke for you.
he looks away from you, avoiding eye contact, struggling to find the right words and feeling vulnerable under your gaze.
“i… i don’t know. it’s just... easier, i guess. i don’t know how else to act around you.” he finally manages to get out, his voice shaking a bit.
“maybe start by not being a dick.” your tone is sarcastic but you had a smile on your lips, hoping both jake and johnnie couldn’t tell you were trying to light up the mood with your usual ironic humour to not make them uncomfortable. 
jake lets out a laugh, feeling a bit more at ease with the sarcasm. johnnie, however, looks visibly frustrated. he clenches his fists, struggling to keep his cool.
“easier said than done.” he mutters under his breath, his tone cold again.
the smile on your face dropped, something inside you wanted to know his reasons badly, to dig more and more until the truth finally would show itself. 
“what’s that supposed to mean?”
johnnie notices the smile dropping from your face and feels a pang of guilt. he runs a hand through his hair nervously, avoiding eye contact with you again.
“you wouldn’t get it. it’s just… it’s easier for me to be mean to you than anything else, okay? i don’t know why, but it is.” he says in a low, frustrated voice. “does that satisfy your curiosity?”
“sure.” you whisper, giving up on understanding his heart. maybe that’s why you were so obsessed with trying to figure out misunderstood movie characters, they reminded you of people in real life. they reminded you of… johnnie. you wanted to be able to find out why he’s like that with you, but he built walls around him when it comes to your presence. no matter how hard you try, he never will let you in.
you sigh, letting your head fall on jake’s shoulder again and paying attention to the movie in silence, he watches you put your head on jake’s shoulder, feeling a mix of disappointment and frustration. he wanted to say more, to explain himself further, but he couldn't find the words.
jake wraps an arm around you, sensing the tension in the room, and squeezes your shoulders gently. he glances at johnnie, trying to give him a subtle ‘fix-this’ look, but johnnie just looks away.
the rest of the movie continues in tense silence. johnnie remains quiet, lost in his own thoughts, while jake tries to lighten the mood with occasional jokes or comments about the movie.
you, on the other hand, was fighting a war inside your head. it’s either caring about the conversation that just happened or move on completely, you were divided between those two things, but then the past rushes through your head, when you used to care and show everyone how much you were hurt. in order to change, a lot of tears were shred.
and that’s why you are the way you are now, if people don’t wanna talk, you do not force them to, why tell them how you feel if they don't care and probably will use it against you at some point? plus it’s not like you had hoped things would change between you two.
the credits start to roll, signalling the end of the movie. jake looks between you and johnnie, noticing the lingering tension in the room.
“well, that was definitely something.” he says, trying to lighten the mood again and johnnie just nods silently, his gaze fixed on the now-empty screen.
“he killed everyone in order to get the life he wanted.” you start talking. “he also drank his friend’s bath water and went down on his sister while she was on her period.” you bite your lip and smile at jake. “i’ll be thinking about that for a while…”
jake burst into laughter, remembering the scenes you mentioned. “yeah, that was pretty messed up. but the whole drinking the dirty bath water scene made me lose my shit!” he laughs again, wiping a tear from his eye.
johnnie tries to not show a reaction, but he visibly cringes and lets out a soft “ugh” at the memory.
“bro, the slurping sounds got to me.” your laugh was so loud and genuine that jake couldn’t help but laugh with you as he nods, clutching his stomach from laughing. 
“dude inhaled it like a chocolate milkshake."
johnnie can't help but crack a small smile, enjoying the friendly banter between you and jake, but he still keeps his comments to himself. 
suddenly the room is quiet again and before things possibly get uncomfortable, you get up.
“alright, that’s my queue.” you give jake a small hug and take the box of chocolate in hands. “i’m taking these with me thank you very much.” jake hugs you back, still chuckling at your laughs. johnnie watches silently as you get up and head for the hall, a mix of disappointment and relief showing on his face.
“leaving already? you can crash here, you know.” jake says, sensing your intention to leave.
“nah, i’m good.” usually you’d actually do that, but sleeping in the same house as johnnie wasn’t the best move right now. “text me later, yeah?” you smile at jake and leaves without looking at johnnie.
he stayed silent as you left, watching you go without another word. he felt a mix of emotions, frustration, guilt, and a hint of sadness that he couldn't quite explain. jake glanced at him, sensing his inner conflict.
as you drive home, a million thoughts go through your head. mostly about him. and the worst part is that you didn’t even know why, but that was sort of okay, no one was there to watch you being vulnerable, so the questions naturally got to you.
why do you care so much about it?
why does your heart kind of sink everytime he doesn’t just tell you how he feels?
you don’t care about people who don’t care about you, why is that different when it comes to johnnie?
when finally home, you find yourself rewatching the memories from earlier, the way his voice softened, or the brief smile he let you see. it’s as if you caught a glimpse of the real him, and you can't stop wondering what lies beneath the icy exterior.
just when you think things would finally settle down in your head, your phone lights up, jake was calling.
“are you home yet?”
“yeah, what’s up?” you pick up right away, trying to hide your anxiety, but jake could sense something off just by the way you spoke.
“everything okay? you sound a bit off."
“i’m okay.” you fake a laugh, jake was your best friend after all, he knows exactly everything about you, including when you try to hide your pain and feelings. in fact, he was the first person to notice them and not judge you for that. “don’t worry about it.”
jake is still not convinced by your fake laugh.
“bullshit. i know something’s wrong. don’t try to hide it from me."
“it’s just…” you sigh, what’s the point of hiding it, anyways? you don’t need to be strong in front of him, jake would never hurt you like everyone else did in the past. “i care more than i’d like to…” you finally confess, hoping he would get what you mean without making you explain any further. 
jake is quiet for a moment, understanding what you’re talking about instantly. he’s not surprised, jake could feel the tension between you and his roommate today. and how you seemed affected by it.
“it’s about johnnie, isn’t it?” he lets out a soft sigh on the other end of the phone. 
“don’t say his name…” you tell him in a whisper, cringing with the possibility of johnnie finding out you’ve been talking about him. “i feel like there’s something underneath it.” you explain, laying on your bed and staring at the ceiling. “you know i don’t care about people being mean to me, got over it a long time ago. i just give it right back, not giving a shit. and i tried that to him for years, but the way he looks at me…” you close your eyes, taking a deep breath. “i can’t figure that look on his face, jake. and it’s driving me insane.”
“yeah, i get it, but here's the thing… i know for a fact that he doesn't hate you." jake pauses for a moment, trying to figure out the best words to say. "he’s just… confused when it comes to his own emotions, you know? he’s got this whole mean act going on because he doesn’t know how to deal with feelings.”
“i would get it…” you begin to say, collecting your thoughts not to show the quavering voice . “if he acted like that with everyone, sure, that’s understanble, but it’s only with me. what the fuck did i do to him?” you almost yell the last part in frustration.
jake listens to your words, feeling your frustration through the phone. "i don't know, man. he’s never really explained his reasons to me either.” he ponders for a moment, wondering if he should tell you. “hey, can i ask you something?"
you got confused for a second, thinking he was about to make a joke or change subjects.
“sure.”
"have you ever considered that maybe... just maybe... johnnie is a dick to you because he likes you?" jake waits for your reaction with a small grin on his face, knowing your tendency to never consider the obvious.
and react you did, frowning and squinting your eyes so hard that for a second your head started to hurt. 
“what kind of nonsense are you onto about, dude?” you blurt it out, finally laughing. jake laughs at your reaction, finding your disbelief amusing.
"i mean, think about it for a second. it fits all your theories, doesn’t it? why else would he be so mean only to you? maybe he’s trying to hide his feelings by being cold."
“too much weed inside your rotten brain, jake. that’s what it is.”  you said still laughing and continued to tease him a little “i’m gonna put you in rehab or something.”
jake chuckles, still enjoying your denial.
"hey, you’re the one who can’t stop talking about how johnnie looks at you. i’m just planting the seed of thought, man. you never know." he pauses for a moment before continuing. “and just for the record, i’m not smoking anything at the moment. thanks for the concern, though."
“well, your seeds are just rocks and they’ll never grow anything but disappointment.” you tell him catching your breath from laughing so much. “but i do feel better now.” jake probably could tell you were smiling because he went quiet for a second, and that made you smile even more. “thanks for being my best friend, yeah? you’re my anchor.”
jake grins, happy that he was able to make you feel better.
"that's what best friends are for and just so you know, you’re my anchor and my sister." he chuckles before continuing. “but i won't stop planting those 'rock seeds' of mine. maybe one day they'll turn into an exotic flower or something."
“yeah, a toxic one.” you hear his laugh and roll your eyes. “i’ll go to bed now, talk to you later, okay?”
"sure, get some rest. and think about what i said." jake teases you before continuing. “sleep tight, darling."
you roll your eyes after hearing the ridiculous pet name, remembering when it started. one time you told him he gives father vibes to you, so he just calls you that because in his words “messing with your daddy issues is fun”.
after you hang up the phone, the room falls silent once more, and your mind begins to wander to the conversation you just had with jake.
now the stupid rock seed of thought he planted in your mind refused to disappear. the sentence  “maybe he’s trying to hide his feelings by being cold” playing in an infinite loop inside your head.
as much as you tried, the thoughts kept nagging at you, refusing to be ignored. you sigh, realizing that sleep would elude you until you figured this out.
an hour ticked by and you tossed and turned in your bed, no matter how hard you tried, you couldn't stop thinking about johnnie's behaviour and the possibility of him somehow “liking” you.
memories of the way he looked at you, the way he softened, only to revert back to his aloof self seconds later, it was so confusing.
eventually, the morning sun began to peek through your window, signalling the start of a new day. you felt exhausted and frustrated, with no answers and no sleep.
as you drag yourself out of bed, you feel the exhaustion weighing down on you. the lack of sleep and the endless loop of thoughts about johnnie had left you feeling drained.
you head to the bathroom and splash your face with cold water, trying to jolt yourself awake. but even as you look at your reflection in the mirror, the thought of johnnie's hidden feelings still lurks in the back of your mind.
“well, now i’m fucked.”
you whisper to yourself, feeling defeated.
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iamjacksragingboner · 11 months ago
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Gross Childhood Best Friend Soap
Word Count: 1.6K
Alternate Endings Here
Warnings: The tiniest smidgen of angst but it ends nice so you better not complain, not super proofread
A/N: Yeah I dunno, came up with this last night and just crammed it out today in a sort of word diarrhea in which I blacked out and woke up naked and alone in the middle of the bush with this on my laptop screen. Make of that what you will
Contrary to his callsign, Soap is, and always has been, a gross little goober of a man
He’s been gross since you were kids, going digging for worms, collecting hermit crabs to take home from the beach in his pockets, rolling around in the dirt and coming home tracking mud on the carpet. Of course, it wasn’t all bad. He’d always offer to kiss your scrapes and bruises better, even if they were bloody or muddy. He’d always find pretty seashells to give you amidst his hunt for the largest hermit crab. He was gross within reason.
You had many a fond memory of going off to the creek at the back of your neighbouring houses with him. You'd climb up to what felt like perilous heights in your child minds, to sit on the highest point of the creek. From there, you would watch as Johnny dug for the perfect stones for you both to skim, watch him build dams and change the currents of the water. Watch as he would lunge at bugs, fish, tadpoles, lizards, and present them up to you from below, the squirming creatures clutched in his mud covered hands.
At the end of the day, just before your parents would call you back home for dinner, Johnny would climb up on the rock with you, just to sit and hold your hand. If he was feeling particularly bold, he would plant a kiss on your hand, and tell you he was going to marry you one day. You called him gross for that too, but latched onto the idea all the same.
Your early teen years, where puberty had begun for the both of you, was plagued with a myriad of varying smells and odours. Forget sweating like a pig, Johnny sweat like a boar; walking home from school with him after P.E. was a nightmare for your nasal cavities. You didn't mind though, he made good enough conversation that you ended up getting used to the stink.
For the amount of afternoons you spent in his room, you'd think you would eventually get used to the sight of his dirty clothes and mugs littering his floor and desk. You never did, always scolding him for not keeping his room clean knowing he had a lady coming over. He would always laugh, even as you threw his pillow at him, copping it square in the face.
So many nights were spent laying side by side in his bed, talking late into the night, curious hands too scared to do more than brush pinkies with the other laying inches away. You always felt as though you could feel him staring at you in the quieter moments of those nights, but you never caught him.
You spent your later teen years feeling bitterly towards him. You went from thinking you'd be best friends forever, to being an afterthought for Johnny. You did try, of course, to keep close to him.
In his late teen years, Johnny was gross in the sense that he’d go off to parties just to see how many people he could make out with. Would have sex with anyone who offered, just for the hell of it. Accompanying him to parties was a nightmare.
"You promise you won't abandon me this time?" You found yourself asking this more than once, each time slightly less optimistic than the last, but never losing your faith in him.
"Of course not, lass," he would always say. "Yer ma' girl! I'll stick right by yer side this time, lass. I promise."
What shallow promises they were. You were always demoted to the third wheel, the one who held the drinks while he went off to flirt with someone new he hadn't fucked yet. You found yourself leaving early and alone most nights, walking home and hugging your sides to keep yourself from falling apart, kicking stones imagining they were Johnny's face. Cursing yourself for thinking this time would be different, and that maybe he'd look at you for once. Going to bed cold and bitter, knowing just next door, Johnny would be waking up with someone else next to him in his bed. You just hoped he remembered to keep his room clean for them.
You both graduated, with Johnny leaving to join the military and you leaving to go to university. You kept in scarce contact over the years, occasionally calling to catch up, Johnny telling you where he was stationed, you telling him what you were working on at uni, apologising for missing birthdays, missing holidays, promises to call again soon, promising to catch up when he's home, all shallow. At least, that's what it felt like to you.
Until one night, when you were out at a bar with you friends, celebrating your recent graduation. You were all discussing with great vigour what you would all get up to with your newfound freedom from studies, when you felt the familiar feeling of eyes boring holes into the back of your skull. A little unsettled, you took a look around the bar, trying to see who could possibly be staring at you so intensely, but you couldn't quite catch their eye. You sipped at your drink, a frown furrowing your brows for a moment, before you brushed the feeling off altogether.
An hour passed and you'd forgotten the feeling in the haze of the alcohol. You were ordering yourself another drink, and as you reached into your wallet to grab out your card, another hand swooped in front of you to pay for your drink. You looked up, startled, before you met his gaze. Johnny. Staring down at you with a smile that could melt glaciers.
"Johnny, you didn't tell me you were in town," you murmured, eyes greedily taking in as much of him as you could in this moment of reunion. Scars on his chin covering the one he got from splitting his chin riding a bike for the first time. Stubble covering his jaw. The corniest mohawk that he had always talked about getting, sitting on top of his head. Your face flushed beet red when your eyes dragged over his built form; apparently that childhood crush you'd had on him all those years ago hadn't quite faded as much as you'd thought it had.
"You didn't tell me you'd graduated university, lass," he replied, the sound of his voice—finally in person again and not over the phone—sending shivers down your spine. "Had to find out myself from yer mum."
You hid your guilt behind the drink you tipped back into your mouth, averting your gaze as he watched you with dark eyes. "Thanks for the drink," you breathed, and he laughed.
"Don't even mention it, 's the least I can do. Why don't we go sit down somewhere 'n catch up, aye? Come on, lass."
You found yourself being guided over to a booth, Johnny's hand on the small of your back, sending ripples of warmth through you and into places the alcohol couldn't quite reach. You sat down first, with Johnny shuffling in close beside you, your shoulders brushing, electricity coursing through your veins.
As you sat and spoke, catching up on what you've missed in each other's lives, you found yourself noticing something. Johnny was using all the moves he used to use on people he fancied in high school, the ones he used to get them all flustered, to get in their pants.
You had to admit, you could see why so many people slept with him; he was charismatic as all hell, that boyish charm spawning those all too familiar butterflies in your gut, and he was quite literally always in contact with you. Whether it be the arm resting behind you on the seat of the booth, his knee gently nudging yours beneath the table, or a hand tucking a hair behind your ear, it seemed Johnny had turned the charm up to the max.
It was nice to be on the receiving end of it for once, but there was a certain bitterness that still lingered behind like a foul taste in the back of your throat. Was this just meaningless flirting to him, were you just another girl on his list to fuck and be done with? With all the alcohol in your system, you were well and truly past the point of caring, but you knew that if you woke up tomorrow morning in an empty bed you'd not only be cursing him, but yourself as well.
You let him lean in closer, tracing a finger down your cheek, and you let yourself be giddy, blushing like a schoolgirl when he winked at you. You let yourself swoon when he kissed you, cradling your face in his calloused palms. You let him take you back to his parent's place, nestled just next to your own home. You let him take you upstairs and into his room, holding your hand and shushing you when you both laughed a little too loud.
You let yourself feel like teens once more as you stumbled into that all too familiar room, hit with the smell of Johnny, the smell of home. You felt guilty, ashamed, as you let yourself savour the taste of him, the feeling of his naked body pressed against yours, his hands raking along your body as if you'd disappear if he let go. You let yourself fall asleep in his arms, smiling as he carded his fingers through your hair and pressed kisses to your scalp, whispering incoherent things into your skin.
You awoke the next morning, expecting to find Johnny's bed empty. But it wasn't. And neither was it the next morning, or the morning after that. In fact, the pair of you spent a lot of time waking up together.
This is where you find yourself now, lying in the early morning light in Johnny's bed, the man in question sprawled out next to you, snoring with his mouth wide open, drool leaking on his pillow.
"Gross," you murmur to yourself with a fond smile, tucking yourself into his side and closing your eyes once more.
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going-to-ikea-for-the-fries · 6 months ago
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Thoughts on soap and reader as teenagers together??? (I just read that fic about teenage Simon x reader 😼🔥)
I'm so glad you asked me this, because I do have thots!
Hope it doesn't offend that it's just random disjointed headcanons. I do have the posts below the separator as inspo!
Teen!Soap x Teen!Reader: (mid-late 2000s edition)
cw: same as home (underage drinking/smoking/drug use, underage criminal activity, teen romance, etc.)
Teen!Soap who was raised lower-middle class with a gaggle of older sisters, three in total.
Teen!Soap who's father worked in a factory and who's mom was a carer at a nursing/care home.
Teen!Soap who was was always a bit scrappy and didn't really enjoy people in authority positions, teachers included... (and who even talked back to his football coach at times).
Teen!Soap who is like a vibrant lure, attracting people to him with his funny jokes and bright smile and laugh, who consistently keeps a growing group of friends, and is an extrovert through and through.
Teen!Soap who met you at school in Year 7 and took a liking to you because you were just as ballsy, stubborn, bold and playful as him... and so absorbed you into his group of friends.
Teen!Soap who got lucky enough to join little league football when he was 8, and became a goalie very quickly because he was fast and bulky enough to defend the goal.
Teen!Soap who, like most young boys who play football in Scotland, became fairly popular in school, because he was handsome and athletic, and often had girls come watch his games.
Teen!Soap who couldn't give a single fuck about the girls flirting with him or coming to watch his games because, every time, without fail, he'd run off the field to come give you a high-five and chat with only you.
Teen!Soap who'd only turn up home from school after the sky was dark, because him and his friends (you included) were hanging out in a random field/park/woods or in someone's garage.
Teen!Soap who started smoking at 11, drinking at 13.
Teen!Soap who discovered rock and, especially, pop punk music on youtube as a pre-teen.
Teen!Soap who became the quintessential late 00s emo-punk teen: fishnet fingerless gloves, baggy tees, skinny tees, studded belts, combat boots that he ripped once and fixed with duct-tape (that he called his 'arse kickers'), too much hair gel and hair spray, chokers, bracelets, studded everything, cargo pants, boxers showing, flannel shirts...
Teen!Soap who had his first handy given to him an older girl at a "party" in someone's garage.
Teen!Soap who'd regularly taunt the police with curses, flipping them the bird and even mild vandalism.
Teen!Soap who once stopped the cops from harassing his friends due to being disorderly by putting a brick/cobblestone through the windshield of the police cruiser and then took you by the hand and took off running.
Teen!Soap who backed you onto a wall in a back alley after you escaped the cops and locked eyes with you, and, amidst the adrenaline, pressed his lips to yours :)
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also used these three posts of mine as inspo:
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mrsparrasblog · 5 months ago
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COD porn links
MDNI
I tried to add some more inclusive vids like male X male plus sized and fetishes
Kyle
He is mad at you for flirting with another guy
Dryhumping childhood best friend Kyle
Kyle fucks you while you're handcuffed
Sucking his dick after deployment
After he tells you I love you for the first time (mxm)
Kyle being a good boy
Kyle and his wife
Price
John teaches his rookies some respect (mxm)
You talked back Infront of the team ( god he looks so much like price - respectable drooling not from the mouth)
Husband Price
He apologised for being so long on Deployment
John price with his new insecure sergeant
Sucking older bf price
Price is hungry for your cunt
Simon
Simon uses your cum as lube (male X male)
You're not allowed to cum (mxm)
Pre military Simon fucking his first girlfriend
Just the tip love
Simon always loved them bigger
Soap
The minute he comes back from deployment (male X male)
Johnny in lingerie
The video Johnny shows when someone asks how you look
(never shows your face but your cunt is okay -idiot)
Johnny has a foot fetish
Johnny loves you
Please let me play with your tits
Johnny is a needy bastard
Extra
The video you got after sending them a nude
But why does it give Johnny and Simon "we're just friends" vibes
Threesome with Simon and Johnny
Johnny getting himself off in the barracks
Sunshine and price from my fanfic
Valeria and Alejandro sharing you
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diejager · 8 months ago
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Cw DARKFIC, DUB-CON/NON-CON, dark cbf!Johnny, smut, manipulation, kissing, groping, teasing, tell me if I missed any. Since tumblr removed this post a few minutes ago, I’m reporting it! I’m not sure if it was removed because someone reported it or the AI found it or smt, but I always have a back up :)
Your mother had always cooed at how close you were with Johnny, an unbroken and loyal friendship that she hoped would keep even when you grew older, changing schools and moving to find work. She thought it an innocent thing, adorable and cherishable in every sense knowing that Johnny was a strong and aspiring man, he would be able to protect you and help you in your time of need. And he did, Johnny was glued to you by the hip, following you everywhere you went and stared at you with devoted and desperate eyes. You could trust Johnny with everything, even your deepest and darkest secrets.
When you confessed to Johnny that you watched your friends kiss, the naked love in their eyes shining through, and felt a slight twinge of curiosity and envy in your heart, he showed you how it felt to kiss with love. Johnny hid you in his room, fingers curled around your hair and pulling you forwards, his lips warm and soft against yours. He kissed you with intent, a hot and churning love that had you whimpering and clinging onto him, melting in his arms while he moved your lips to his beat. It took your breath away, instilling a burning fire in your heart, the young embers of a bonfire that would light up your heart with a booming throb. Despite you gasps and shortness of breath, you sought Johnny for a second and a third kiss, leaning towards him with pouted lips. 
You were only 13 when you gave your first kiss to the perfectly plumps lips of your best friend.
When you caught boys groping their girlfriends in public areas, unabashed about their affection being perceived as lewd or inappropriate for the public, and gossiped with Johnny about how weird it was to grope someone - even a lover - in public was and that it should be kept indoors, especially when one would moan or yelp, Johnny explained it to you with his body. You were left in your house’s living room, parents off to work and leaving you two alone at home, he groped you, his rougher fingers kneading your pubescent body. Johnny squeezed the curve of your hips, trailing down your plush thighs and up your ass until you gasped in shock before it turned into mewls, little, breathy sounds that encouraged Johnny to do more. He slid his hand beneath your shirt and pinched your perked nipples, rolling your little nubs between his thumb and index while you arched, writhing so much that Johnny had to straddle you to keep you from moving too much. 
You were only shy of adulthood when you felt the first dribble of slick down your ass from your childhood best friend’s hands.
When you shared to Johnny all the stories of your friends losing their virginity - the V-card, they called it, as if it were something worth losing or giving without much though - and all the brutish and callous ways they spoke of it, you edged on shock and apprehension about such a thing, Johnny promised he would show you how important it was to give it to someone worth your time and heart —him.
“Ye trust me, dinnae ye,” he whispered your name so reverently, his breath tickling your nape as he pressed himself into you. 
You do, your trust Johnny with your whole life, but you were still unsure about it. You were nervous with how optimistic Johnny was about taking your virginity as much as he was to give you his, and yet, despite your fears, you still gave yourself to him because he was your trusted, childhood best friend. Johnny fucked you amaturish but devoted snaps of his hips, rocking into you until you cried out his name whenever he bumped into something gummy and sensitive inside of you. You bled, but the pain never persisted, it was quickly swallowed by pleasure, waves of drowning ecstasy that numbed your mind and wracked your body with tremors. You saw the appeal in losing your virginity, to succumb to the pleasure of sex and give yourself to someone you truly loved and trusted. 
You were only 18 when you felt the uncut and hard cock of your childhood best friend. 
Taglist: @sae1kie @yeoldedumbslut @bvxygriimes @distracteddragoness @konigsblog @im-making-an-effort @daisychainsinknots @h0n3y-l3m0n05 @danielle143 @tuttifuckinfruttifriday @notspiders @brokenpieces-72 @petwifed @randominstake @hayleybarnesx @shironasumi @sparky--bunny @bloobewy @cod-z @sweetnanah @aldis-nuts @rainbowsabre @evolutionarry @kaoyamamegami @cassiecasluciluce
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Prom part 1: cbf!soap x f!reader
You had been on the phone with Johnny all day.
"I don't understand why I can't be there." He whined and you giggled as you finished your makeup.
"Because you'd get bored watching me get ready." You argued but he groaned.
"No I wouldn't!"
You shook your head with a smile. You knew he would've been bored but you were also more nervous and too excited to see him.
You wanted today to be about prom, nothing else, but when your mother had brought in the mail this morning you had been surprised by the acceptance letter into the university you wanted.
It took everything in you to not call him immediately. You wanted to tell him about it so he could help you get ready and maybe in hopes that he would also end up coming to the university as well, just like how you both had talked about before.
You’d tell him tomorrow or probably after prom tonight when the two of you got dinner.
“I’ll be done in thirty minutes-“
“Then I’m coming over now!”
He hung up before you could protest. You were halfway done with your hair when he showed up and you quickly had to yell out of the bathroom for him to wait.
“We’ll be late!”
“That’s a lie! We still have a while.”
Johnny groaned, not because he was worried about being late but because he really wanted to just be with you. He wanted to spend every last minute with you since he was going to be gone for months at the end of the week and before he told you he was leaving.
He knew it wouldn't go over too well, but he hoped that at the end of the day you'd want to just spend time with him too.
He could live with you being mad at him if it meant you were with him still.
He waited in your room, making sure that the suit he was wearing looked good enough while he went over telling you in his head. How he'd try to tell you softly...he just couldn't help but wonder why he'd have to be so secretive about it.
Shouldn't you be supportive? Shouldn't you want him to follow his dreams?
His thoughts were cut short when you walked into your room and suddenly nothing else mattered.
You were done up; your hair and makeup done perfectly to match your dress. You looked beautiful and he couldn’t find the words to say it as he stared at you.
“You look handsome.” You smiled at him and ran your fingers through his hair to fix it.
Johnny tensed up but then melted from your touch, leaning his head against your stomach before he wrapped his arms around your waist. He looked up at you with soft yet sad eyes that made you slightly worried.
Now it really sunk in that his time was limited with you.
“What’s wrong?”
“What if we just hung out tonight? Just the two of us?”
You frowned and stopped running your hand through his hair. Why did he want to change plans all of the sudden?
“We gotta go, you paid for the tickets.”
“I don’t care about that-“
“Johnny.”
John’s sighed deeply and shut his eyes. He hid his face in your stomach and squeezed you tightly.
“I love ya, you know?”
You stiffened but nodded. It wasn’t often the two of you said ‘I love you��� to each other because you both knew it without the words having to be said. But anytime either of you said it, it came from a place of friendships nothing else, something that made you wish it could be something more.
Your throat tightened and you swallowed hard.
“I know. I love you too.”
Johnny looked up at you and for a moment, both of you stared at each other with a sort of sadness hidden within your eyes that the other wasn’t sure where it came from.
The desire to take it away made both you and Johnny pause, the desire to say everything nearly pouring out of you both before you heard your mother call for you.
“You’ll be late and I want pictures!”
Johnny chuckled and you smiled. He gave you one last squeeze and you caressed his face quickly before the two of you broke apart.
“We can leave early.” You suggested and he beamed.
“Then we can get food out.”
A/n: didn’t plan on two parts but it would never get posted so here you go.
Tags: @elysian0612 @cassiecasluciluce @pepsicolacoochie @hayleybarnesx
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cobwebs-in-autumn · 13 days ago
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Childhood Best Friend Johnny who “proposes” to you when you’re both little and when you grow up you acknowledge it as just a childish thing but Johnny tells all his military buddies about his pretty wife back at home and how he’s planning on giving you a baby or two now that you’re both old enough and he has a steady job to support you now.
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iamjacksragingboner · 11 months ago
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Gross Childhood Best Friend Soap - Alternate Endings
Word count: 1.3K
Warnings: Some angst but like you'll live, you don't end up with Soap though you're rejecting him like that's the whole thing
Part One: You can find part one with the original, happy ending here. Please read that one first so you're up to speed with the context to these other endings.
A/N: As I was writing the end of the Gross Childhood Best Friend Soap fic, I briefly had the thought to make the reader reject Soap, like bitch oh my god have some self worth you don't need to immediately forgive him for being a dick to you.
Anyway, this alternate ending could go one of two ways.
The Immediate Rejection.
“Why don’tcha come back to mine with me, bonnie,” Johnny coos, and for a moment you almost accept his offer.
Almost.
Sure, the boy you’d spent way too many years pining over and never gave you the time of day finally paying attention to you was great, in theory, but it only took a second of reminiscing to think better of it.
This boy was the reason you spent so many nights walking home alone, cursing yourself for falling for his shallow promises spoken by sugar sweet lips again and again.
"Ah, no. Thanks Johnny, but I'm not interested." It comes out dry, but you hope it gets the point across. He had missed his window of opportunity years ago.
Johnny laughs and jostles your shoulder. "Come on, lass. Just a night! Doesn't have tae mean anythin'. I've missed ye."
You hold strong to your word, as attractive as Johnny is, and always has been, you know you're better than that. "Really Johnny, I'm not in the mood."
His hand skirts up your thigh and you groan internally at his inability to take the neon-coloured hint. "I bet I can change that for ye."
Swallowing your pride, you lean into Johnny and cup a hand to whisper into his ear "I have like three STD's at the moment, dude. I don't think you wanna bump uglies with me currently."
It was a silly lie, but you knew it would be more than enough to get the message through his relatively thick skull. You were right, of course, because as you pulled back to take a look at the expression on his face, you had to fight not to burst into laughter.
Johnny looked as though he'd sucked on a lemon but was trying not to let it show. He'd pulled back from you by at least a foot as well, and kept his hands firmly clasped in his lap. "Ah," he said, and cleared his throat. "Well. Good to know."
"Yup."
Silence. You wondered how long it would take Johnny to get up and scout out a different lady, as you were sure he would after this.
As it turns out, it took a grand total of a minute and a half for him to get up, bid his adieus and walk out of the bar, promising he'd call you soon, and wishing you all the best with your... things.
You downed the rest of your drink with a wicked grin stretching across your cheeks and walked merrily home.
2. The Gradual Realisation of Self Worth.
He only comes to you when he needs you.
Only gives you affection when he knows it'll benefit him.
Leaves you cold and alone in bed.
Tells you you're beautiful, says he loves you, but only when you're actively serving him. Patching his wounds. Sending him care packages. Buying him drinks. Always giving, but never receiving.
The bed is so cold.
You curl in on yourself night after night, but you never cry. You are convinced that surely, one day he will return your affection. One day he'll prove you right and show that he has changed, has given up on his shallow promises. You ignore the voice in your head that tells you he hasn't.
You spent so long trying to fix him, put so much time into trying to make him a better person, telling him to eat better, to keep his room clean, teaching him to cook, teaching this man the bare minimum, only to get nothing in return.
He didn't love you, and at this point you weren’t even sure if you liked him. Did you like him, or did you like the comfort of having someone that could hold you, if he wanted to. There was never a guarantee.
You fixed him, but you didn't get to reap the benefits of your own hard work. You fixed him so he could go an fuck over the next person a little less.
You start rejecting his advances, ignoring his texts asking you to come over for a quick fuck. You stop sending him care packages with home made food and letters telling him about how you've been since he was home. You don't answer the door when he knocks. Quitting him cold turkey.
Eventually, he stops texting, stops calling, doesn't throw rocks at your window.
There is silence; a breath of fresh air.
You bump into him at a bar a few months later. You make polite small talk, and he flashes you that grin that pulled you in the first time, but it falls flat and slips from his face. You move away from the hand that caresses your waist.
"Let's get out of here," he bends down to whisper in your ear, "come back to mine, I've missed ye, bonnie." Johnny's hand creeps up your face, a wolf-like grin stretches and snarls across his cheeks.
Your face turns stony, ashen. "Leave me alone, John."
His grin falters at the omission of his nickname, the name you had always called him. In all your years of knowing each other, not once had you called him John.
"Bonnie," Johnny starts, concern flicking over his face. What a joke. He chooses to care now, when he's at risk of losing his quick fuck.
"Don't call me that," your voice is sharp, cutting through the pollution he's breathed on you for so long. "Do not speak to me as if you've ever given more than two shits about me, because I know for a fact the only thing you see me as is a hole to shove your dick in."
You had passed the point of mourning over what could have been, of what you wanted this 'relationship' to be. You were only capable of feeling anger and distain towards the man before you.
"Now, lass, there's no need for ye think that," Johnny rubs your arm in an attempt of comfort that came all too late. "yer more than that to me, I promise."
I promise.
I promise.
I promise.
"Fuck you and your promises, John," you spit, slapping his hand away from you, creating distance between you, because as far as you're concerned, he lost the privilege of touching you long ago. "You're always promising things, but you never mean any of it, do you?"
Johnny stays quiet, his mouth hanging ajar and his hand hovering in midair, as if he's shocked that his actions suddenly have consequences.
"I have tried for so long to continue to see the good in you, to believe that if I just tried a little harder, you'd actually want to pay attention to me, but I look back on that decision to try and I just feel so... stupid! So utterly stupid for not seeing you for what you are, John. Look I want to wish you the best in your future relationships but honestly I think I'd much prefer if you went and choked to death on a bag of dicks."
As much as you thought it would be cathartic to say even a quarter of what you felt Johnny needed to hear, it honestly wasn't. Johnny was silent as you picked up your things and left the bar. He at least had enough of a brain to not call you, but part of you wished he did. The part of you that still hoped the Johnny you grew up with was in there.
You hugged your arms to your chest and kicked the rocks on the pavement as you walked home alone. Again. You went to bed alone. Again. But it felt better.
Johnny wasn't coming back, and you were glad.
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charliemwrites · 1 year ago
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Don’t get me wrong, I’m a childhood friend Johnny truther. Like, the man is made to be your best friend growing up who’s in love (obsessed) with you.
But childhood friend Simon? Ohhhhhh bitch.
Childhood friend Simon who looked forward to seeing what colors your braids or pigtails were tied in. Little Simon Riley who played rock paper scissors with you across church. Pre-teen Simon Riley whose mum sent him to yours sometimes, and he always looked so drawn and anxious at first, but you’d do everything to coax a smile from him. Teen Simon Riley who punched a boy in the hall for grabbing your ass even though he’d catch hell from his dad for it.
Your best friend Simon Riley who is quiet and pensive, but has a heart of gold. Who breaks your heart when he admits with guilty eyes that he’s enlisting as soon as he’s of age. And you hug him tight, promising that you understand, that you’re proud of him.
Your favorite person Simon Riley, who you kiss that day he’s set to ship out. He gives you his last boyish smile and breathes against your hair when you hug one last time, memorizing the scent of you.
Simon Riley, who writes and writes and writes to you until one day he stops. Simon Riley, who you take a bullet for when they come for his family because they knew to come for you too.
Simon riley who isn’t there when you wake up in hospital, having missed the funeral. But there are daisies on the nightstand - you used to pick them together in your backyard.
They tell you Simon Riley is dead, but you see him watching mournfully across the street one day and storm up to him, his pretty brown eyes going wide.
“You think I wouldn’t recognize you with your face covered, Simon Riley?”
You drag him into a sobbing hug and he grips you tight. Lets you cry all the tears he can’t anymore. You still smell the same in the ways that matter - like his.
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teapartyprincess4two · 8 months ago
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Hi
Can i ask for a johnnie guilbert x reader where the reader is a friend of tara who is a very private person, so she gets know in the channel as "baby" and people start to notice that johnnie gets shy and is always looking somewhere off camera (to her)
A LOTTTT of pinning by johnnie (like so much it hurts)
And maybe at the end he confesses she kisses him and a lil sum-sum 😏
Thank uuuuu 😘
Babygirl- J. Guilbert
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pairing: shy!reader x Johnnie
classification: fluff
warning: use of y/n, slight cursing, slow build up, Jake and Tara are dating in this, suggestive content but NO smut, very long
inspiration: request^^, Deaf, Mute, and Blind Baking, Becoming Tara Yummy for a Day
summary: You didn’t choose a life in the limelight, you were just famous by association, and now you’ve earned yourself the nickname “babygirl” by the entire internet.
Most people wish they had the fame you had, they spend their entire life reaching for an unattainable dream that fell in your lap by coincidence. They wish for the fancy cars, the expensive clothes, and especially to be so famous they’re stopped by fans on the street for a picture.
Tara, your best friend, was one of those people. She spent her childhood and teenage years fangirling over pop stars and YouTubers, hoping that one day people would be fangirling over her too. She worked hard to earn the platform she has today, bringing you along with her to the top. But you never asked for any of this.
At first her newfound fame didn’t affect you, you were just a recurring background character in her videos and would sometimes, but very rarely, have a main role in them. Although you tried remaining in the background, the internet is quick to get attached to shy, background characters and before you knew it the fans were begging for more content with you.
So now you and Tara are a well known YouTube duo and you’re featured in almost every one of her videos, most of the time opting to participate from behind the camera. You especially remain behind the scenes when Jake and Johnnie are involved, specifically because you’re never able to hide your crush on Johnnie and would probably die from embarrassment if the fans caught on.
Like today for example, Jake and Johnnie are over at your house filming. They’re filming a video they’ve filmed many times before, they’re turning Tara emo. The three of them are piled onto the couch, discussing topic after topic as Johnnie packs on black eyeshadow on Tara’s eyes.
“Ow, Johnnie. You’re hurting me!” she squeals as Johnnie accidentally pokes her in the eye with the bristles of the brush. You can’t help but giggle from behind the camera, watching as Johnnie becomes flustered. “Sorry! I only ever do my own makeup, okay?” he apologizes, not becoming any more gentle with his motions. Johnnie glances at you quickly, a smile forming on his face because of your laughter.
“Why are you laughing, Y/n? You’re next,” Jake chimes in, following his statement with a boisterous laugh. Your face flushes slightly as you reply with a laugh, “no I’d prefer not to be tortured.” Johnnie laughs at this, sending you a fake pout, “you hate my look that much?”
Your face becomes even more red, if that was even possible. You didn’t mean the comment like that. Tara, whose face is being attacked with makeup, chimes in, “No, Y/n is too babygirl for this.”
“Oh God, you’re making me sound so high maintenance,” you laugh, shaking your head in disbelief at Tara’s comment. “It’s true though!” she exclaims, turning to face you just as Johnnie begins applying eyeliner, causing a black streak to run from the corner of her eye to her hairline.
“Guys, Y/n is probably the most high maintenance out of the four of us. She gets a manicure exactly every two weeks, she gets her hair redyed like once a month, her room is NEVER dirty. She almost never ever has dirty laundry, AND she irons her clothes. Who irons their clothes?” Tara exclaims, flailing her arms in the air dramatically.
“So yes, she’s babygirl,” Tara’s talking to the camera now, completely oblivious to her appearance. You scrunch your name at the nickname, the internet tended to latch onto things like that, “First of all, you look ridiculous right now. And secondly, don’t call me that. I don’t need to be known as ‘babygirl’ for the rest of my life,” you reply, laughing as Johnnie tries to fix his mistake but fails.
Jake, who’s sitting on the couch next to Johnnie, straightens up and leans forward to look at Tara. He immediately laughs at the sight, the black eyeliner smudged all over her face. “You’re just mad that it has a nice ring to it,” Tara retorts, choosing to ignore the mess Johnnie made. You scoff, glad that the camera isn’t on you to catch how your eyes train on Johnnie.
“Okay, but doesn’t it sound cute?” Tara proposes the question to the boys, waiting expectantly for them to answer. Jake was always quick to agree with her, it was a trait she trained him to have over the years of their relationship, “yeah, it’s pretty cute.” Tara nods her head in triumph, turning to Johnnie for his response.
Johnnie doesn’t know what to say, he agrees that the nickname is cute, but he’s afraid he’ll say too much and expose his crush for you. “Johnnie?” Tara says, widening her eyes as she awaits his response.
“What was the nickname again?” Johnnie asks, trying to act casual. But if the cameras zoomed in they’d easily catch how his hands tremble as he fixes Tara’s eyeliner. “Babygirl?” he reiterates, attempting to sound confused and oblivious. Tara nods her head, causing Johnnie to mess up once again, but he’s too busy trying to keep his composure to care.
Coming from him the nickname doesn’t sound so bad, it actually makes you want to take back everything you just said. “Babygirl is cute,” he murmurs, sending you a small glance before quickly turning back towards Tara. You hide your face in your hands, trying to hide your flushed cheeks and the smile that won’t go away no matter how hard you try.
“Enough with the babygirl talk,” you groan, but you really loved hearing him say it.
From that moment on, you were known as babygirl within the fandom. You couldn’t escape the nickname no matter how hard you tried, and the fans loved teasing you about it. Whether it be through edits, Instagram comments, or tweets; the fans were always calling you the nickname.
Johnnie, Jake and Tara are currently filming yet another video, despite your protests. The three of them are standing behind the kitchen counter, with either tape on their mouths, earmuffs on, or blindfolded. They were trying to bake a cake, something they struggled to do even without the inhibiting factors, so all they were really doing was making a big mess.
They understand your hesitance with being on camera, so they never force you to make any special appearances, but you still loved to watch. You sit behind the counter, just out of view of the camera, watching in amusement as the three interact.
Johnnie keeps getting distracted by you, fumbling and stuttering his way through the intro. You watch as Johnnie struggles to find the supplies needed for the video, searching through every cabinet in the kitchen. “Every time Johnnie says he’s ready, he’s never ready,” Jake comments, adjusting the black beanie on his head. “Where the fuck did I put it? No, Jake where did you put it?” Johnnie replies, scavenging for the baking supplies.
“They’re in the pantry,” you comment, walking over to Johnnie briefly and guiding him towards the pantry. Johnnie smiles at you, grateful that there’s at least one sane person here to help him. The interaction was caught on camera, but you were too distracted to realize.
“Thanks babygirl,” Tara exclaims, bopping her head to the music blasting through her headphones. You roll your eyes, helping Johnnie take everything out of the grocery bags and sprawling them out onto the counter. Once everything is in order, Johnnie’s mouth is quickly covered with a sticker, but he’s happy he isn’t blindfolded because he can keep sneaking glances at you.
The entire situation was chaotic, none of them had any clue how to communicate properly and they had less knowledge on how to bake a cake. Jake’s arms were stretched forward as he tried finding his way through the kitchen, Tara’s loud singing making it hard for them to concentrate on one task alone.
Tara, who wore the headphones, was more focused on singing than the cake. You watch them intently, unable to stop yourself from laughing, “you need to whisk the cake!” Tara, who can’t hear a single thing you’re saying, repeats your statement causing you to burst into laughter.
Johnnie pulls out a plastic butter knife, deeming it appropriate for the task. “Get the beater!” Tara yells, following it by belting out song lyrics. Johnnie has no idea what Tara is talking about, so he sends you a pleading look. If there’s anyone here who’s going to help him finish this cake, it’s you.
“The whisk, get the whisk!” you exclaim, trying to talk over Tara’s singing as best as possible.
“What’s going on?!” Jake asks, one of his flailing arms slapping both Johnnie and Tara. Johnnie’s laughs are muffled by the sticker as he holds the whisk out for Jake, guiding him to the bowl.
“Babygirl?!” Tara is being so loud, her voice a good three octaves higher than normal. “Stop yelling!” you exclaim, but she ignores you and changes the song, continuing to belt out the lyrics.
“Y/n, we need your help,” Jake comments, stirring the bowl so aggressively that it was twirling. “We have no idea what we’re doing,” he continues, lifting the whisk up and blindly taking a lick.
“JAKE DON’T LICK IT!” Tara yells.
Johnnie’s laughter and shocked scream are muffled, his face scrunched up as he laughs uncontrollably, and you can’t look away. You wish you weren’t so shy, so that way you’d be able to join them in this fun activity without feeling anxious.
“This cake is going to be so bad,” you chuckle, catching Johnnie’s attention. His eyes linger on you for a little too long, a moment the fans were definitely going to clip and edit.
“What did you say?! Did you say my singing is bad?!” Tara is still yelling, following each and every statement with loud singing.
Many dirty dishes and a messy kitchen later, the cake is finally done. The oven rings throughout the kitchen, and Jake and Tara send Johnnie to fish the hot pan out. The cake didn’t look too bad, but considering you watched them make it, you weren’t too excited to actually try it.
“You have to wait until it cools to frost it!” Tara exclaims, the headphones causing her volume to be more than pleasant. Johnnie can’t respond because of the sticker, and he doesn’t want to wait for it to cool, so he continues haphazardly spreading the icing over the camera. Jake, on the other hand, is in his own world.
“That actually looks disgusting. It’s raw,” you gasp, watching as Johnnie lifts the spatula to reveal an uncooked, watery mess. “It’s undercooked!” Tara yells, her inability to hear you causing her to repeat everything you say in different words.
Johnnie’s muffled laughter is infectious, earning a string of laughter from you. “Let’s just eat it,” Jake suggests, facing the complete opposite direction of the group. The beanie on his head inhibits him from seeing the state of the cake, but even if he could see it, he would probably still ask for a bite.
“Wait let me help,” you get up from your seat and walk behind the countertop, immediately searching for something to serve the cake in. “This is gonna have to do it,” you hand Johnnie three plastic cups. He scoops up the raw batter, the liquid cake jiggling in the cup and running down the sides, immediately coating his fingers in frosting and batter.
“We’re gonna get salmonella,” Tara is staring at the goopy mess in shock, how had they managed to mess up such a simple recipe?
“I wanna see… I think we should take this off,” Jake yanks his beanie off, a fit of laughter attacking him as soon as he sees the state of the cake. Tara was subconsciously poking at it, creating a big hole in the center. Johnnie’s hands were full of chocolate frosting, and he held them up in exasperation as he waited for someone to remove the sticker from his mouth.
“Here lemme help you,” you murmur, gentle hands removing the sticker. Your touch lingers a little too long, but he doesn’t complain. If he had it his way, you’d have your arms around his neck and his lips would be on yours.
“Thanks, babygirl,” he whispers in return, loving how easily the nickname riled you up. You hated how much you loved hearing him say it.
“This is actually not that bad!” Tara’s boisterous voice breaks you two from the intimate moment, forcing you to reenter reality. “Try it,” Jake suggests, going back for a second scoop.
Johnnie is hesitant, but he grabs the cup and puts a spoonful of the raw cake batter in his mouth. His face contorts in disgust, but it couldn’t be that bad, could it? “Here let me try,” you take the cup from him, using his spoon to take your own bite.
As soon as the cake hits your tongue, you’re gagging. “Oh wow this is horrible,” you say, fighting the urge to throw up. They’re all laughing at your reaction, Jake pulling a long hair from his mouth in the process. “I love this hair, adds flavor.”
“Oh my God, I’m gonna throw up,” the hair Jake held between his fingers was only making the situation worse for you.
“See, she’s so babygirl,” Tara laughs, joking about the situation even if she found it equally as gross.
It seemed like your friends were always filming because every time the four of you hung out there always seemed to be a camera lurking not too far. Like today for example, Tara gathered everyone for a casual hangout, but once you arrived she explained that everyone was going to be living like her for the day. At first, you declined her invitation, making a lame excuse about not feeling good. But she begged and begged for you to be in the video, and before you knew it you were an integral part of it.
“Okay, since you guys are becoming me for the day, it’s only fitting that you dress the part. So, put on these track suits,” Tara says as she hands you, Jake, and Johnnie each a pink track suit. You’re trying to hide from the camera as much as possible, but Tara keeps pulling you back in every time you almost wander away.
The three of you shimmy into the outfits, immediately feeling the Tara Yummy essence wash over you.
“This is sexy,” Jake comments, admiring his figure as the sweatpants hang loosely from his hips. “I’m serving cunt,” Johnnie says, joining Jake in admiring himself. Their tattoos peeked through, contrasting the pink outfits entirely.
You emerge from the hallway seconds later, the track suit providing you with a newfound confidence, “I feel so stupid, but I also kinda feel like that bitch.” You stand still, allowing the camera to pan to you before hitting a dramatic pose. You turn around to show the camera the backside of the suit, the word babygirl written in curly white letters across your ass. “Slay, babygirl, slay,” Tara chimes in, strutting over to you and hitting the same pose.
“Let’s please not start with the babygirl jokes,” you groan jokingly, adjusting the sweatpants that kept riding up, you were starting to get a wedge. But you knew you weren’t going to escape the babygirl comments today, especially not with it written across your backside. It was like a label that you were forced to wear for the rest of the day, and the fans would surely seize the opportunity and run with it. To top it all off, the four of you were so well color coordinated that you looked like a 90’s girl group, ready to perform on stage at any moment.
“This is fun, but I still don’t understand why I’m being forced to do this,” you say, staring at Tara blankly.
“Because you’re my best friend,” she replies cheerily, offering you a big smile and booping your nose. It was hard to stay mad at her. She walks away, joining Jake as they engage in conversation.
“And you’re babygirl,” Johnnie teases, coming up from behind you unexpectedly, immediately causing a blush to form on your face. He loved watching you get flustered over the nickname. He laughs at your reactions, relishing every bit of it.
“Alright, first things first, time to eat. Mama’s hungry,” Tara says, ignoring yours and Johnnie’s interaction before facing the camera and leading everyone to the car. Jake and Tara are far ahead, leaving you and Johnnie to trail behind.
“It’s gonna be leaves,” Johnnie whispers to you, earning a laugh in response. He loved making you laugh. “Yeah, how much you wanna bet we end up at Health Nut?” you ask, settling the bet with a firm handshake between you and Johnnie. His hand holds a firm grip on yours, almost like he’s hesitant to let go as he says goofily, “$2, take it or leave it.”
As predicted, the four of you end up at Tara’s favorite restaurant; Health Nut. It’s no one else’s restaurant of choice, but you’re living as Tara for the day so it doesn’t matter what the rest of you want. You’ve been here with Tara enough to be familiar with the menu, so you order a simple salad and drink before moving to the side and allowing Johnnie to order. Once he’s finished ordering, he pays for your meals before letting Jake and Tara order.
Johnnie is playing it up for the cameras, trying to embarrass himself with his actions before the pink track suit does it for him. He’s sitting on a toddler chair and you stand next to him, choosing him as your comfort zone.
Because you always opted to remain behind the scenes, most of the viewers weren’t completely aware of yours and Johnnie’s dynamic. You two were always clinging to each other in uncomfortable or unfamiliar situations, making quiet jokes to make the other laugh. You both also had a huge crush on each other, which further served as a gravitational pull.
“Order for… babygirl?” the employee calls out, a hint of confusion in their voice as they read the name on the order. This immediately causes you to laugh out loud. “You did not do that,” you whisper shout at Johnnie, who held his hands up in feigned defense as he tries not to burst into laughter. You awkwardly grab the food, both of youwalking over to Tara and Jake’s table.
“Did they just call you babygirl?” Tara asks as soon as you’re sitting down. “Yes dude, fucking Johnnie told them that was my name,” you laugh, hiding your red face in your hands. They call out Tara’s name and she dismisses herself briefly to pick up the food.
“Let’s go!” She exclaims from the restaurant’s front door, bag and drink in hand as she pushes the door open and walks outside. “Oh, I guess Tara Yummy eats in the car,” Jake says sarcastically, the three of you following Tara to the car.
Once you’re in the car, you and Johnnie sit in the backseat while Jake and Tara occupy the front. “I wanted to eat in there, but you guys are so embarrassing,” Tara says, handing Jake his food.
She doesn’t give any of you enough time to respond, “you guys are already pretty embarrassing, but the pink track suits make us all look genuinely crazy.” She’s obnoxiously shaking her salad from the front seat, causing the entire car to rock.
“Damn, don’t gotta put your whole pussy into it,” Jake laughs, earning a sly remark from Tara. Soon, they’re lost in a conversation of their own, leaving you and Johnnie to talk quietly in the back seat.
“Why do you keep pushing this ‘babygirl agenda,’ sir?” You ask, both in true curiosity and to make light of the nickname. He blushes, mindlessly picking at the salad in front of him.
“Oh come on, don’t get all shy now,” you tease, piling up a good bite on your fork. He smiles at you awkwardly, preparing to admit something embarrassing.
“I think it’s kinda cute,” he admits with a shrug, taking a big bite of his food. Your eyes blow open in shock, this whole time you thought he was teasing you, but now it turns out he thinks it’s a cute nickname? “Don’t make fun of me,” Johnnie pleads in defense through a mouthful of food.
“I’m not, I just wasn’t expecting that,” you respond, trying not to be too loud. You couldn’t help it though, your giggles were soon filling the backseat. There was something about the confession that gave you hope that maybe you and Johnnie could be more than just friends. But you don’t want to get your hopes up, ir could easily all be for the video. You’re about to say something crazy and bold, but you’re cut off by Tara.
“Are you two done flirting? Cause I’m in the mood for coffee.” Leave it to her to ruin a sweet moment.
The day is finally over and the four of you are now wearing pajamas, reminiscing on the day’s events. Tara and Jake leave once the video is over, leaving you and Johnnie to lay on the large couch. The room is silent, but it’s not awkward, you’re both just catching up and joking.
“I was serious earlier, by the way,” he murmurs, staring at the ceiling above. “Yeah?” you say in a teasing tone, rolling over on your side so you’re facing him.
He takes a deep breath before continuing, “Yeah. If I’m being honest, I’ve had a crush on you for a long time. I’m surprised you haven’t noticed, I mean the fans definitely have.” You mindlessly play with the strings of your robe, subconsciously scooting closer to him.
“So that’s why you keep calling me babygirl?”
“Mmm yeah, mostly. I think it sounds cute,” he smiles down at you, your figure just slightly further down the couch. You feel a surge of confidence wash over you, something you don’t usually feel as a shy person, and straddle his lap.
He looks at you in shock, both arms limp at his sides. “Say it,” you whisper, moving your face dangerously closer to his. You use your hands to grab his, placing them on your waist. He feels excited, nervous, and shocked all at the same time, was this really happening?
You grind your hips down onto him, hoping to elicit a response from him. “Babygirl,” he whimpers, the sudden friction sending a shiver up his spine that has his hips bucking. You hum in response, finally inching close enough to connect your lips to his.
You’re in a heated make out session, completely obvious to the world around you. Johnnie’s hands are roaming your body, your hips are grinding down onto him, and your fingers are tangled in his hair. You kiss from his lips down to his neck, sucking and biting the delicious skin until you leave a hickey.
The situation is about to escalate, but Jake and Tara interrupt before it can. They saunter in loudly, both you and Johnnie jumping off of each other in shock.
“About damn time!” Jake says, applauding you both for finally make a move on each other. “Get it babygirl!” Tara laughs, joining Jake in his obnoxious round of applause.
“So annoying,” you groan, throwing a pillow at them and shooing them out. Once they’re out of the room, you and Johnnie share a sheepish look.
“You’re never escaping that nickname,” he chuckles, silently pulling you back on top of him. “That’s okay. If you’re the one saying it, I don’t mind,” you murmur, kissing him again.
“Okay, babygirl.”
MASTERLIST
a/n: Such a good request, I LUV being challenged with these specific requests!!! Hope I did it justice bby, I rewrote this like 5 times & had a different storyline each time. Also, I mentioned the famous hickey (💀💀) and I changed it from “baby” to “babygirl” because he mentioned that he’s “so babygirl” on Trisha’s podcast.
anyways, enjoy hunny bunches. Luv uuuuu
-L.A.M.B👼🏻💗
taglist: @nicksmainbitch @sturniololovers @mayhem-72 @worldlxvlys @gnxosblog @meg-sturniolo @creamoncreamoncream2 @mattnchrisworld @sanyi5 @lustfulslxt @whicked-hazlatwhore @tworosesblackthorn @mxqdii @fawned01
note: if you want to be tagged in my fanfic related posts, you can access my TAGLIST and comment 💐
note: requests are open, I will be writing as many as possible because you guys have sooo many good ideas. Please be patient 💗✨
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lovifie · 5 months ago
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Masterlist
495 words / No cw, just fluff
Childhood best friend Johnny Mactavish, that saw you had doodled a little dog on your notebook and in that second decided you were going to be friends.
Johnny that saw you drowning in the pool and jumped in to save you forgetting he didn't know how to swim either.
Johnny that got his nose broken when he got into a fight with some kids teasing you and got his ass beaten because it was 1 against 3.
Johnny that told you his plan to enlist in the military even though he was still too young because he wanted to become the best version of himself.
Johnny that came back crying to you when they rejected him, only calming down when you were cuddling and cooing at him about he just needed to wait a couple of months.
Johnny that used those couple of months to grow bigger and stronger, entering the military easily when he finally was of age.
Johnny who grew up being a scrawny kid that used to sit on your lap and still does even now that he has grown bigger than you. Chuckling when you huff at the sudden weight and patting your hands when you lock them around his waist.
Johnny that kissed your temple before going to boot camp, promising to write you a letter "like soldiers in the movies"
Johnny that did write you a letter, many of them actually, that looked like ripped pages of a journal telling you everything that happened to him.
Johnny that told you that they had given him the nickname "Soap" and that he would tell you why in person.
Johnny whose letters grow more and more distant in time, with less and less details about what he is doing. Saying it is classified and that it is better if you don't know.
Johnny, who suddenly appears on your doorstep with his arm in a sling and a bullet wound on his arm, saying he is on annual leave.
Johnny that sits on your toilet as you cut his hair and he tells you everything about his new teammates with nothing but utter adoration for all of them.
Johnny that one day tells you that they are meeting at the pub and that he wants to introduce you to them.
Johnny that does so, and introduces you as "my bonnie lass" with his hand on your waist. And you don't really mind. Keeping his hand on your thigh as he plays with the loose threads of your ripped jeans.
Johnny that gets a bit tipsy and accuses you of ruining his date life because ever since he met you he has not been able to feel anything for anyone that wasn't you.
Johnny, that when you sent him a message the day after about whether he meant what he said, his response is:
"Every single word, bonnie"
↓Taglist↓
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@vane28282 @draculara @vivi2e @lordbugs @murder-hobo
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tojisun · 1 year ago
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…yea sure why not?
-
baker!simon who’s known for the bit he’s got going on – something you wished your friends would’ve told you because the first time you walked into the niche bakery (at six am to boot) and saw simon, big and tall and inked and masked simon, you screamed bloody murder.
“jesus-!” he yelled back in surprise, almost dropping a tray of freshly baked shortbreads before whipping his head up to see what was going on only to feel like he’s been punched in the gut because there you stood by the entrance, bundled up with thick jackets like you’re preparing for winter even though fall was just settling in, your hair a haggard mess and your face gaunt from exhaustion, and looking like all parts of simon’s dream woman.
“um,” you stammered, staring at him with wide eyes and trembling hands, your heart hammering in your chest as you began to panic. “i, uh. i’m…?”
simon watched as you continued to stammer before finally taking pity on you. he placed the tray on the counter and turned to fully present himself to you, spreading his arms out in hopes that it would show you that he’s not dangerous. that you would see his flour-covered apron and see that all he’s got going on in life is baking, and then instantly be enamoured with him.
“you here for breakfast?” he asked, clearing his throat upon hearing the awkward croak of his voice. thank god for his mask because he was able to hide the flush of his cheeks, allowing him to continue to play it cool in front of you.
“yes?” you replied, still confused as to why the… baker? was wearing a homemade skull mask.
“sure,” he said and you watched as he wiped his hands on his apron. “come over here then. what’d you want to order?”
baker!simon who isn’t really a big sweets enthusiast but whose desserts are the best in the block. you asked him what made him pursue this career and you watched as he stilled, his face falling slack like he can see something you couldn’t – like he is reliving a memory – before shaking himself with a deep inhale and finally whispering, “for my brother.”
you did not probe any further, your heart heavy with guilt, but simon just turned to you with a small smile and asked, “wanna hear about ‘im?”
he gathered you in his arms as he recounted the few fond memories he has of his childhood, and you breathed him in, smelling the faint smell of macaroons and toasted butter on his skin.
baker!simon who begins dedicating his daily special treats to you. “for the apple of my eye,” when it’s apple fritters day. “for my beloved cheri,” on cherry pie day. “for my precious sugar,” on sugar cookies day.
baker!simon who proudly prances around in his frilly pink apron that has “husband material” embroidered on the chest. you gave it to him as a gag gift but simon loves it so much that he began to wear it to work, showing it off to his friends with a deep chuckle.
“my girl got it f’r me,” he says to johnny. “pretty, isn’t it?”
johnny nods amidst laughter, his body folded into himself as he clutches the counter for support.
-
fuck. baker!simon might even be better than biker!simon
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oceantornadoo · 4 months ago
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you: an absolute teeth-aching bone deep want to be loved and to give love. that hollow feeling behind your chest is too familiar and you want it gone. you just want to be in love, to treat someone with gentleness and to be wanted.
your 141 bae who has been in love with you since the moment he met you: ...i'm right here
gn!reader headcanons below the cut:
childhood best friend simon: let's say you knew him before he lost his family. a scrawny-limbed blond, always willing to extend a trip to the park or a cigarette behind school - anything to not go home. you'd visit him when he started part-time as a butcher in high school, wrinkling your nose at the smell of bloody meat but staying anyways, doing your homework at the singular table in the shop. he was there when you moved away from town, for college or a new job or any life-altering decision that he was secondary to, something simon could only hope to grasp. once he leaves for the military, you mourn your relationship and move on. simon is a blur in your mind, a reminder of snow days and sweet tea summers and leaf piles and dandelion picking, on a nostalgic shelf in the untouched corners of your brain. ten years later, you've finally made a name for yourself and truly gotten out; grown roots. but you still have this soul-deep yearning, some unfamiliar-shaped hole in your chest that miraculously fills when you open your door to simon, a grown man who's tired of wanting you from afar. tired of stalking your social media and writing fantasies in his head. tired of picking people to fuck just because they look like you, then going soft halfway through because their voice isn't the right pitch. he's here, and he's ready to do whatever it takes.
best friend gaz: now this is different from a childhood best friend, so keep that in mind. gaz is always this guy-next-door type with a panty-dropping smile and impeccable manners. this notion does him some good, helps him avoid some deep-rooted british military prejudices, but it also turns you away. you check him off as nice and place him in the best friend box. you don't understand how he tracks your every move on a mission, almost always getting caught by johnny or price. you miss how he grips his pint ten times harder when he sees you on the pub floor, dancing with some stranger whose hands are a bit too low. he tells you he gets rejected for being "too nice", but really, he ignores his 27 unread DMs and flirty cafe eye contact in favor of movie nights, prank wars, your shitty reality shows. he's grasping onto straws, can't you see sweetheart? when you're drunk and turn into a cuddler, he can pretend just for a second that you truly mean it. gaz lets your hands wander under his shirt, lets you murmur your darkest fear of never being loved into the quietness of your room, leaving you to sleep on top of your covers with a kiss to the forehead. he doesn't know what's pushed him over: you almost dying on that last mission, you making out with a stranger in a bar, you you you in those pants and that shirt and that's it. he has to say something. has to put it all on the line because gaz can't live like this anymore.
best friend's brother price: it was some one-sided crush, your best friend's brother with his suave teenage ways as compared to your brutal tween phase, acne and braces on the way. it had dissipated quickly, john never the wiser, his presence substituted with trendy band obsessions and first kisses. instead, it happened at your best friend's wedding. you were both in the wedding party, some object of fate throwing you together as your best friend forced you two to dance. you were tipsy on champagne, on the happiness of marriage, that you giddily admitted your fleeting childhood crush and how much john had grown since then. and that was it. john was always going to settle down, always going to have a pretty thing waiting for him back home, he just didn't figure out until right now that it would be you. he tries to hide his affections under friendliness, not wanting to ruin your friendship with his sibling, but john has never been discrete. he's suddenly invading your life with offers of fixing your kitchen sink, painting that one spot you can't reach, moving your couch to fit your latest pinterest board. you're practically family, love - which kills all your hopes for something more, feeling like a familyzone. but john means it differently, means you're predestined to be his, already accepted and loved by his loved ones and how could he not see it before? you refuse to accept his kindness and it absolutely kills him, so he scares off potential dates and any chance of meet-cutes with an arm around your waist and why can't you see him the way he sees you?
friends with benefits johnny: it was just sex, right? you'd been the one to say it, the one to set that boundary with your fellow sergeant. you didn't think johnny was capable of more, mistaking his cheeky smirks and booming laugh for being unserious, when in reality, johnny is as serious as it gets. he tells himself he can fuck you because he'll marry you one day, that cross sitting heavy under his shirts. he doesn't wash his sheets for weeks after that first fuck, too busy inhaling the scent of you cumming around his mouth, his cock. that is, until, you tell him his sheets stink and refuse to fuck him and he pretends you're having an argument as a married couple, all intimate and bored. johnny sees a recruit getting too flirty and pulls you into a supply closet using his best distraction methods. he sways you from joining a month's long solo mission, some stupid excuse about missing your lips too much when really he knows it's a suicide mission. johnny forces you to stay over after a midnight fuck, some bullshit about simon being up at that time and seeing you in the hallway on base. in reality, he treasures cuddling you with his brawny arms, pretending you're his willingly. pretending he's made peace with you, this wild creature, never tamed but understood. he can't force himself to ask for more, too scared to lose the crumbs he's holding onto. johnny tries to hide it with a fiery personality and a thick accent, but inside? he's a complete goner.
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98752-blog · 1 month ago
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You normally kept to yourself, a little cold, a little aloof - polite but definitely standoffish.
Soap takes that as incentive to pick at you, tease you anyway he can - he was bordering unprofessional, but hey, he got Lt. to open up didn't he? You shoot back just as much, a little more sharp but he can see your shell breaking.
one day, he notices you seem a little more tired, a little more drained, you're in the hallway, murmuring quietly into your phone. He can't make out what exactly is being said, but he decides to go up to you once he sees you've hung up.
"Look as though yer boyfrien' jus broke up w'ye," he grinned, cute and boyish
You say nothing, your chest is shaking and your breathing is shallow. You're afraid if you speak, you'll just crumble.
Your lack of words stuns him, and you shock him even more when you just walk by him to head back to your room. He trails after you, not much in mind, though deep in the recesses of his mind, he is worried.
When you go to shut the door in his face he can't hold back his comment:
"Team's walkin' on eggshells cus' a ye"
You shoot him a nasty glare, and all the words he wanted to say die in his throat. There are thin tear tracks down your face, he pushes forward, "Hen, i didnae mean,"
papers shift underneath his feet and he looks down in surprise, there are letters and trinkets strewn about your floor, pictures and so so many letters.
"What's all this?"
"Get out Soap." You find an empty spot in the mess and he has reason to believe you've sat there more than once.
"Worried abou' ye." You just shake your head, hands finding the letters closest to you. He carefully steps over the mementos, and scoots until he's standing next to you, before plopping down gracelessly.
"Lookin' like yer friend really did break up with ye." He said quietly, taking everything in.
"Johnny, can you just go, please." Your voice breaks midsentence and he whips his head around and sees you now, fat tears down your cheeks. Without thinking his hands reach out and he pulls you into his arms, cradling your head against his chest.
"Ach, I- Hen, listen, I'm an eejit, a big smelly eejit - I'm sorry, really, I am - don' cry, please." He whispered, heart clenching as you trembled in his arms. When you settle, he shifts to reach for a letter - there are so many he doesn't have to move far. It's from your mother, apologizing for how she had reacted to you moving across the world.
He remains silent and stationary, before reaching behind him and grabbing a blanket to wrap around you, tucking the ends behind him.
"Sometimes I wish I wasn't here." He jolts and squeezes you, "I ken bonnie, it's ay tough life ta hae any relationship."
"I don't have a boyfriend Soap. I mean missing all these big things back home... losing my childhood dog, missing my grandmas funeral, not being with my grandad while he was hospitalized."
You sniffle and it sounds like a gunshot to him, his heart beating too fast, "I'm not there to support my family, I'm not there for them when I should be."
"Ye can take a leave." He says, voice low and soothing. You scoff, wet and rough, "What then? Try my best to put everything back together just to leave and go save the world again?"
"Their world is falling apart and mine is going with it. Theirs is the one I'm supposed to be saving - I can't - because I'm not there for them when I should be."
His arms were tight around you, "I ken bonnie, it's hard... hard to be away from the people you love."
"I wouldn't come back." You whispered hoarsely. the words hanging in the air like a dirty secret.
The door creaked open and his head shot up, "Bloody hell," Ghost stands in the doorway, his figure nearly blocking out the light. His eyes dart from Johnny's to your small figure, bundled and cradled gently. He lingers for a beat more before he trudges in, leaning down to pick up all the letters and trinkets off the floor. He sits in your chair with a heavy sigh, eyes scanning over everything in his hands.
A heavy question sits in the air: Do you want out?
"Sergeant." The Manchurian accent rumbled in the space, you lifted your head up, eyes bloodshot.
"Sir."
"My office, 0600 tomorrow."
"Sir." Ghost looks at you impassively, before directing his attention to the notes in his hands.
The words blurred together,
what you've missed
what you're going to do when you visit
when are you available
would you ever come back
Your best friend got married, a wedding invitation sits unopened, the date months past - a mission in Russia, he recalls vaguely.
An invitation to a family gathering, new relatives to meet, new babies to play with, faces to see, places to go
missed
missed
missed
missedmissedmissed
Ghost couldn't relate, a shadow of who he used to be, a dead man walking.
But he feels a small ache; a bittersweet longing, he may not have people who cared for him anymore
but you certainly do.
And he can spur the smallest bit of humanity in him to feel some regret for you, knowing that despite him not having anyone, he wasn't being left behind in their lives - unlike you.
for: @waves-against-a-cliff thank you, for speaking sense
for:@rememberwren can't write heartache like you do, but damn trying - projecting in the meantime
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