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[my-ccmg]

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[eebie]

hugbob carepants

[a-shot-of-the-strange]

How do you take your creaps?

i take my careps with CHEESE mf

[geekylucy]

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[srkpolymers]

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[the-lumpfish-king]

I should also be allowed to sucker onto people, very species affirming carep

talking so hard i need to be able to walk up to people and gently headbutt them while purring

[psychologistmimi]

You cannot swim for new horizons until you have courage to lose sight of the shore Anchors are important. They hold you in place at where you need to be. They can also proverbially weigh you down.

[my-ccmg]

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[campyvillain]

"What's Biden gonna do about tax evasion" shirt

shut up Nobody carep

[ochalina]

Perjuangan Masuk CPNS

Cerita aku kali ini mungkin juga dialami oleh ratusan ribu warga Indonesia yang pernah mendaftar CPNS. Saya cuma ingin berbagi kisah secuil betapa berat dan sulitnya jadi CPNS.

Waktu itu, aku sudah 5 tahun kerja sebagai wartawan di Tempo Group. Sejak lulus kuliah aku memang jadi wartawan di Tempo, dimulai jadi calon reporter (carep) hingga naik jenjang ke M1 (bisa disebut sebagai editor). Gaji pun berangsur naik seiring naiknya jenjang karir. Saat itu, bagiku sudah cukup Alhamdulillah, dan aku bangga menjadi wartawan Tempo.

Baiklah, sekarang kita fokus saja pada proses masuk CPNS. Mungkin ceritaku ini sudah banyak tidak relevan dengan pendaftaran CPNS tahun ini. Maklum saja, aku daftar CPNS sudah 5 tahun lalu. Aku terdaftar sebagai CPNS sejak Maret 2015 di Kementerian Pariwisata (sekarang berubah nomenklatur jadi Kementerian Pariwisata dan Ekonomi Kreatif).

-----

“Tik, Ibu dapet info katanya lagi ada pembukaan CPNS. Coba kamu cari tau aja, terus daftar. Siapa tau lolos bisa jadi PNS,” tiba-tiba suara Ibuku terdengar jelas saat aku sedang nonton tv. Tik adalah singkatan dari kata “cantik”. Jangan ketawa ya, ibuku memang memanggilku cantik sejak aku masih kecil :)

“hhmmm...” kataku.

“Ibu sih pengennya kamu gak jadi wartawan lagi. Ibu khawatir sama jam kerja kamu. Kalo lagi piket malem bisa pulang pagi, piket pagi tetep pulang malem. Belum lagi kalo tiba-tiba disuruh liputan yang bahaya-bahaya, ke kantor polisi, ke kamar mayat, duh ngeri ah.”

“Iya mom, nanti aku cari info soal CPNS itu ya. Aku lihat dulu persyaratannya gimana. Kalo ribet di awal aku gak minat ah,” sahutku cepat supaya Ibuku gak memberi wejangan lain.

Sebagai anak yang ingin berbakti pada orang tua, akupun mulai cari tau dari internet tentang pembukaan CPNS. Aku baca bagaimana persyaratannya, mulai cari info sana sini. Lalu aku menetapkan akan daftar, karena saat itu Presiden Joko Widodo (Jokowi) sudah mengubah proses masuk CPNS dengan sistem CAT dan mulai transparan dan akuntabel. (Ya ampun, bahasa apa ini!)

Intinya, aku yakin proses seleksi CPNS kala itu sudah mulai bersih dari KKN, siapapun bisa berkompetisi tanpa harus memberikan “uang pelicin”. Satu hal lagi yang membuatku mau mendaftar, prosesnya diawali dengan rangkaian tes dahulu baru menyiapkan pemberkasan yang harus dipenuhi.

Saat itu, pendaftaran CPNS hanya bisa untuk 1 Kementerian dengan satu posisi jabatan. Akhirnya aku menggunakan strategi dasar, mencari Kementerian yang menerima jurusan kuliah Komunikasi, dengan spesifikasi jurnalistik. Setelah mendapat beberapa kandidat Kementerian, aku cari-cari lagi yang saingannya gak banyak. Hahaha...

Awalnya aku ingin daftar di Kementerian Kominfo, karena sesuai jurusanku. Tapi emang dasar gak jodoh ya, mereka belum juga membuka pendaftaran di saat Kementerian lain sudah hampir menutup pendaftarannya. Akhirnya aku memilih Kementerian Pariwisata untuk posisi Analis Berita. Cocok dengan background pendidikan dan pengalaman kerjaku.

“Klik.. klik.. klik..,” aku sibuk mengunggah beberapa syarat awal untuk pendaftaran CPNS. Seluruh persyaratan aku baca dengan teliti agar tidak ada yang salah. Setidaknya aku harus lolos proses pendaftaran untuk membuktikan bahwa aku mengikuti keinginan Ibuku untuk ikut CPNS.

Yeaaayy.. akhirnya aku lolos administrasi!

Oke, tahap selanjutnya adalah tes CAT. Ada 3 bagian dalam tes CAT. Aku pun membeli buku latihan soal-soal tes CAT CPNS paling baru dan paling lengkap. (Hahaha... intinya mau coba seriusin ikut proses seleksinya).

Jujur saja, saat itu aku berpikir tidak mau sia-sia setelah mengikuti proses administrasi pendaftaran CPNS. “Siapa tau bisa lolos terus,” pikirku dalam hati.

Proses menunggu jadwal tes CAT itu aku gunakan untuk mengisi buku latihan, belajar di sela-sela pekerjaan sebagai wartawan. Saat itu memang aku masih bekerja, masih dikejar-kejar deadline menulis untuk Majalah Tempo, masih ke kantor untuk menaikkan berita reporter. Pokoknya masih sibuk lah.

Ternyata soal-soal tes CPNS itu susah-susah bangeeettt... Rumit, banyak jebakan, harus bisa logika, harus bisa hapalan, harus bisa hitung-hitungan, harus rasional. Intinya, belajar tiap hari udah kayak anak sekolah mau menghadapi ujian akhir nasional.

Hari tes CAT pun tiba.........

Dag dig dug....

“Bu, besok aku tes CPNS. Doain yaaa supaya lolos. Besok tes nya jam 8 pagi, semoga gak telat ya.” saya minta restu Ibu.

Aku dapat jadwal jam 8 pagi di daerah Kramat Jati. Wow... cukup jauh dari tempat saya ngekos saat itu, di daerah Kebayoran Lama.

Krik... krik... krik... ruangan ujian benar-benar sunyi. Semua peserta sibuk dengan komputernya masing-masing. Begitu pun saya.

Syukur Alhamdulillah skor saya saat itu adalah yang paling tinggi di jadwal yang saya ikuti. Karena saya harus ke kantor, maka saya tidak memerhatikan lagi posisi skor saya. “Ah, nanti aja deh cek lagi kalau ada pengumumannya di internet. Pasrah aja,” pikirku dalam hati.

Ternyata aku lolos!! Ada 3 orang yang lolos untuk posisi Analis Berita di Kementerian Pariwisata. Aku, dan 2 orang lainnya. Tapi ternyata, 1 kandidat lainnya adalah temanku sesama wartawan dari media lain. Omaaiiiggaaattt... 

Kami menjalani tes lanjutan bareng-bareng. Masih dengan membawa deadline kerjaan masing-masing. Oiya, proses pengumpulan berkas-berkas persyaratan aku jalani di sela-sela pekerjaan wartawan. Bikin surat kesehatan, bikin surat berkelakuan baik, bikin surat kuning, dan lain sebagainya. Bolak-balik ke berbagai instansi pemerintah untuk memenuhi pemberkasan itu semua. Fiuuhh...

Dengan restu ibu dan bantuan papaku yang tak pernah berhenti, akhirnya semua pemberkasan bisa kulengkapi.

jeng.. jeng.. jeng...

proses tes lanjutan pun tiba. Yang masih kuingat, saat itu proses seleksi dilakukan dalam satu hari. Ada tes wawancara sampai tes psikologi. Seingatku itu hari Kamis, di mana aku sedang deadline menyelesaikan tulisan Majalah. Sambil membawa laptop, aku justru gak bisa konsentrasi untuk mengikuti proses seleksi lanjutan itu. Saat mengantri pun aku sibuk mengerjakan tulisan Majalah, bahkan aku sampai terlambat mendaftar untuk tes psikologi. Alhasil, aku dapat urutan 3 terakhir untuk tes psikologi, dan konsekuensinya, saat itu aku baru dipanggil jam 8 malam.

“Duh, jam segini baru tes psikologi kayaknya gak bakal lolos deh. Pasti pengujinya udah keburu capek, lelah, dan bosan dengan jawaban-jawaban peserta CPNS lain. Pasti udah tinggal nanya basa-basi aja,” batinku.

Lagi-lagi aku pasrah aja. 

Doa, solat tahajud, solat hajat, solat duha, curhat sama orang tua, minta doa restu Ibu, dan Lillahi Ta’ala. Itu terus yang aku lakukan sambil menunggu pengumuman akhir CPNS.

Mungkin kekuatan doa Ibuku lebih besar dari semua usaha dan doa-doaku ya. Lewat pengumuman, aku melihat namaku yang berada di posisi nomor satu untuk posisi Analis Berita di Kementerian Pariwisata. Intinya, aku Lolos CPNS!!

“Alhamdulillah.”

[imagineproduce101]

Kim Yongguk Harry Potter AU

you’d never seen or heard of kim yongguk until fifth year Charms, when you had been forced to find a partner for the year, as charms was a very practical class and required you to actually perform a lot of spells

the class was a joint class between your house, slytherin, and hufflepuff

you were trying to find a partner amidst the chaos of teenagers when you noticed a timid guy sitting in the back, doodling on his parchment awkwardly

immediately you went up to him, introducing yourself

“kim yongguk,” he replied, bowing his head quickly

you asked him cheerfully if he would want to be charms partners and he agreed, looking relieved that someone had asked him

as you took the seat next to him, you explained that all the other slytherins tended to trick their partners into doing all the work for them

“i promise i won’t do that, though,” you said firmly, making yongguk chuckle a bit

he might have been super quiet, but he was killer at charms

it barely took him any time to pick up a new spell, whereas it took you a couple days

“man, i promise i was joking about that whole tricking partners into a hard carry,” you commented, frowning as your teacup refused to produce legs

“you’re doing fine,” yongguk assured, reaching over to adjust your grip on your wand, “just adjust where your thumb is.”

you felt your cheeks heating up slightly as yongguk gently shifted his thumb next to yours, and he seemed to realize what was happening, shifting away, ears red

you started saying hi to him in the corridors, and you even dragged him to a quidditch game, introducing him to your own group of friends

he started saying hi to you in the great hall and stuff as well

through your time together in class, you learned that he had a really good friend, kim shihyun, who was also in hufflepuff, and was helping him to kind of come out of his shell, but he had transferred to the wizarding school in hong kong since his parents moved

and when the fifth year started, he didn’t really have any close friends and had returned to his shy self

and you were like nuuu yongguk we’ll get you lots of confidence!!

you start hyping him up, much to his embarrassment

“and kim yongguk walks down the hall, flaunting his shiny brown locks, does anyone know what shampoo he uses? magic.”

“damn son, look at that pull charm! that pull charm tho, carpe retractum more like carepe retractDAMN”

he kind of blushes sheepishly when flitwick yells for the punks in the back to be quiet

(you also may or may not think that yongguk is cute as hell when he blushes)

when he tells you sheepishly that he’s not going to the yule ball, you convince him to go with you

“you’re going to experience all the parts of hogwarts whether you like it or not!”

yongguk just laughs at your determined expression, motioning for you to focus on your banishing charm again

yongguk picks you up from the slytherin dorms, dressed in sleek black robes

you’d opted for a simple silver outfit, doing your hair a bit nicer than normal

“you look really nice,” he said shyly, offering his arm for you to take

his hair was actually done for once, curving around his forehead and holy hell he was handsome

you spent the night dancing and laughing at each other, truly enjoying the night

between glasses of punch and throwback weird sisters’ songs, you found yourself thinking to yourself that you wished maybe you and yongguk could be more

throughout the evening, you caught yongguk glancing over at you wistfully, blushing when you made eyecontact, and you couldn’t help but entertain the thought that maybe yongguk felt the same

the last song of the night was a slow song, and you glanced over at yongguk to see if he was okay with dancing to it

he carefully led you out to the dance floor, placing one hand on your waist and holding the other out by your side, swaying you back and forth

“(y/n),” he said softly, making you look up

he was smiling gently, his face framed by the twinkling nights of the night sky, as the ceiling had been charmed too look like the inky black sky above it

“thank you for bringing me,” he said, giving you a quick hug before returning his hands to where they had been. “i’m glad i got to experience this with you”

you stared up at him, breath caught in your throat

it almost looked like he was going to kiss you, his eyes flickering from your eyes to your lips and back

and then the world’s fucker of fuckers ong seongwoo and his partner bumped into you, apologizing before continuing on their warpath, dancing rambunctiously and upbeat to literally the slowest song you’d ever heard

yongguk straightened, making sure you were okay from the destructive monster that is seongwoo

you couldn’t stop cursing the gryffindor for ruining your perfect moment with yongguk

it was okay though, you had gotten to spend the whole night just enjoying life with him, and you’d take that

of course, he walked you to the slytherin dorms like the gentleman he is

and again, you could have sworn that he was going to kiss you, but he leaned in for a hug

as soon as you got to your dorm, you collapsed into your bed, squealing at the thought of the night

even if you hadn’t kissed yongguk, that was twice that he’d almost kissed you, and you’d gladly accept even an almost-kiss

the next morning, you joined your friends to grab breakfast before classes

you were leaving the great hall, a piece of toast in your mouth, when someone grabbed you and spun you around

“(y/n), i meant to do this last night but i kept chickening out,” yongguk said, gently taking the toast from your mouth and planting a kiss on your lips

you gaped up at him, in shock from what just happened

“yah, kim yongguk,” you said slowly, looking up at him, “you’re totally confident now!” you smiled widely, leaning up to kiss him again

he blushed, realizing how many people were staring and talking about the two of you

“only because of you, (y/n),” he said with a shy smile, and you reached down to grab his hand, smiling up at his adorableness

(later on, you found out that yongguk had been talking about his crush on you to shihyun via owl, and had been planning on asking you out during the yule ball)

(and whens shihyun found out he didn’t, he sent yongguk a howler)

(takada kenta’s eardrums suffered greatly)

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