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searchingwardrobes · 5 years ago

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Happy birthday, @welllpthisishappening ! For your special day (I hear it is a big birthday?), I wanted to incorporate things you love into a fic. That includes baseball, and if my ignorant self made any errors, I apologize! Anyway, I hope you enjoy discovering some of your favorite things in this fic. I admire you tremendously as a talented writer and overall wonderful person, and I wish you the very best of birthdays!

Summary: Emma Swan doesn’t do friends with benefits - too many feelings involved. But best friends with a guy she slept with once? Well, that’s completely different. So they get jealous every now and then, that’s not feelings - right? Based on the song by the Gin Blossoms.

Rated T for adult situations and language

Words: Almost 6,000

Also on Ao3 and part of my Fandom Birthday Playlist

Tagging the usuals:@snowbellewells @jennjenn615 @kday426 @let-it-raines @teamhook@kmomof4 @bethacaciakay @profdanglaisstuff @resident-of-storybrooke @thislassishooked @tiganasummertree@whimsicallyenchantedrose @snidgetsafan @delirious-latenight-laughs @winterbaby89 @distant-rose@shireness-says @xhookswenchx @optomisticgirl @spartanguard @branlovestowrite

And you know it might not be that bad, you were the best I ever had. If I hadn’t blown the whole thing years ago, I might not be alone.

What’s the cliche? Something about not wasting time looking in the rearview mirror because that’s not where your headed? Of course, Emma Swan has always been difficult, so to speak, with life maxims. It isn’t that she’s intentionally trying to be cynical, it’s just . . . Is she the only one who ever thinks through these cute sayings? Because, yeah, out the front windshield is your destination, but who doesn’t use their rearview mirrors when driving? What if someone with road rage is kissing your bumper? And don’t people pass slow drivers? Kind of need your rearview mirrors for that.

Of course, there’s probably some saying about not speeding through life or staying in your lane . . . ok, now she’s probably muddling the driving metaphors.

The point is, Emma finds herself looking in her proverbial rearview mirror a lot. They say “what ifs” are pointless, but she’s got plenty of them anyway. Most are painful. What if my parents had kept me? What if Neal and I really had gotten to Tallahassee? What if I had held him, just for a minute?

But others make her grateful. What if Ruth hadn’t taken in an angry, pregnant teen? What if David hadn’t been all “instant big brother”? What if Ruby hadn’t been assigned the office right next to mine?

The one that plagues her the most, however, is What if I had never slept with Killian Jones? Not that the night itself wasn’t great - it was. Not that Killian didn’t graciously ignore the constant elephant in the room - he did. Not that they weren’t best friends despite it all - they were.

She just wondered sometimes . . . she wasn’t even sure, she just . . . wondered. Her sexual partners all fit into three categories: Neal (relationship), one night stands, and Killian, who was . . . what exactly? Her best friend she slept with that one time? The one night stand who became her best friend? Her best friend who just so happened to be a little drunk and sort of lonely at the exact same time she was a little drunk and sort of lonely?

None of their (mutual) friends knew about what happened between the maid of honor and the best man at David and Mary Margaret’s wedding. After all, she and Killian had never met until that weekend. It should have been a perfect one night stand situation - he lived in Seattle. As in, on the complete opposite side of the country. Then his college best friend had to go and get him a job at Storybook Biz.

Thanks a lot, David.

And just like that, her one night stand was across the hall every day at work. It should have been awkward.

Only it wasn’t. And now Emma’s constantly pondering that damn rearview mirror . . .

Tell me do you think it’d be alright if I could just crash here tonight? You see I’m in no shape for driving, and anyway, I’ve got no place to go.

Killian knocking at Emma’s door at a quarter to midnight wasn’t necessarily an oddity. But Killian knocking on her door at a quarter to midnight when he was supposed to be on a date? That wasn’t exactly common.

“Are you drunk?”

He stumbled past her, running his fingers through his already disheveled hair. “Only slightly.”

“I take it the date didn’t go well,” she muttered as she closed the door.

Killian kicked off his shoes and collapsed onto her couch without preamble. “I suppose it depends upon your point of view.” He flung his arm over his face wearily. Emma sat at the opposite end of the couch and propped his feet in her lap.

“Okay, Obi-Wan, enlighten me.”

His voice was muffled beneath his forearm. “Before the appetizers even arrived I knew everything I never wanted to know about Aladdin.”

“Which one, the cartoon or the new one with Will Smith?”

Killian chuckled as he caught her eye, his arm sliding up to rest on his forehead. “Jasmine’s ex.”

Emma’s eyebrows flew to her hairline. “Your date’s name was Jasmine, and her ex is Aladdin? Seriously?”

“I couldn’t make this up if I tried, love. Anyway, I suppose the evening ended well for them since I basically assisted in getting them back together. She raced out of the restaurant to meet him, leaving me with a platter of wontons.”

“Are you trying to date or run some sort of relationship rehab?” Emma asked as she propped a throw pillow on his feet and hugged it to her chest.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Emma shrugged. “This was your first date since Ariel, and you were only helping her make Eric jealous.”

“Which also worked, I’d like to point out.” He grabbed a fistful of his hair as a light seemed to dawn in his eyes. “You know, Swan, you may be onto a new career for me.”

Emma rolled her eyes and then smacked him in the stomach with the pillow. “Shut up. You better not abandon me to Scarlett. There would be bloodshed in the office.”

Killian grabbed the pillow, holding it just out of her reach as she tried to snatch it back. “Are you trying to say that I’m the most brilliant cover designer at SB?”

“No,” Emma huffed, lunging across Killian’s torso to finally get hold of the pillow, “I’m saying you’re much less of a dick than Scarlett.”

Though Killian was the best cover designer they had on staff, and everyone knew it. Including Killian.

“I’d also reconsider your dating choices,” Emma continued, shifting so she was wedged between him and the couch.

“Swan,” Killian groaned, “not this again. You haven’t liked anyone I’ve dated.”

“That’s not true!”

“You didn’t like Ursula.”

“She was too old for you.”

“Belle.”

“She was actually into Scarlett the whole time, and really, how many women can you say that about?”

“Zelena.”

“You didn’t like Zelena! You found an excuse to bail before the menus arrived.”

“Okay, she was scary. But what about Tink? You despised Tink.”

“Well of course. She calls herself Tink for God’s sake.”

He arched one brow at her, then tickled her feet until she kicked him lightly in the ribs. “Okay, I’ll concede, Tink was a little on the eccentric side.”

“You know, I see a pattern here. Jasmine, Ariel, Belle. Should I start calling you Prince Charming?”

Killian gave her his trademark grin, the one that was lopsided and slightly cocky. “I dated a woman named Tink, love, maybe you should call me Captain Hook.”

Emma barked a laugh and dug her toes into his collar bone. “With a perm and a waxed moustache?”

“I could pull it off.”

He probably could, the bastard. Emma swung her feet around and stood up with a grunt.

“I should probably get you some water and an aspirin.”

Killian took the throw pillow she’d discarded and placed it behind his head. “I didn’t have all that much to drink, honestly. Just thought I’d play it safe and crash here? The restaurant was only a block away.”

He gave her his best puppy dog face, and Emma rolled her eyes. “Fine.”

“And I didn’t have anything else to eat after the wontons.”

“I’ll make you a grilled cheese.” She was grumbling as she headed for the kitchen, but in truth she was glad he’d stopped by.

She was always glad when he stopped by. It had nothing to do with his bad date with Jasmine. Nothing at all.

“Only thing is,” Killian sighed as she pulled the frying pan out of her kitchen cabinet, “now I don’t have a date to the charity ball.”

“Oh,” Emma muttered as she got out the bread and cheese. She turned to get the plates, and smiled to see Killian already there, handing them to her. They moved about the kitchen with practiced ease until the sandwiches were ready. Killian grabbed some sodas from the fridge, and they headed back to the sofa.

“What about you, Swan?”

“What about me?” Emma asked, licking a drop of cheese off her finger.

Killian’s eyes darted to her lips, then he gave his head a slight shake. “Um, about the charity event next weekend.”

Several firms in the publishing industry were holding the event. The kickoff was the ball on Friday night, but there was also a charity baseball tournament on Saturday, and a carnival on Sunday. All of it was to raise money for a childhood literacy foundation. It was a pretty big deal for Storybook Biz to be involved. They were the only company participating that provided services to self-publishers, and exclusively in children’s and YA lit at that. It could put their relatively small company in the limelight, something that Regina was reminding them of on a constant basis. Complete participation was required.

“Well, believe it or not, Walsh agreed to go.”

Emma could see Killian’s adam’s apple as he swallowed, his eyes widening slightly.

“A third date, huh?”

Emma set her plate down with a thud on the coffee table. “What’s that tone?”

“There was no tone.”

“Yes there was.”

Killian sighed. “I just . . . think you could do better.”

You mean like you? The words were on the tip of her tongue before she swallowed them back. No need to shine a spotlight on that damn elephant.

“He’s a nice guy!”

“He looks like a monkey.”

“He does not. That’s ridiculous.” Emma shoved her sandwich in her mouth and chewed furiously. Walsh did have sort of a weird smile that when you thought about it . . . She suddenly found her Charlie’s Angels thrift store plate absurdly fascinating. She cringed when Killian practically crowed with laughter.

“You see it too, admit it! It’s the ears -”

“Now that’s the pot calling the kettle black, wouldn’t you say?” Emma teased, reaching over to tug on Killian’s elf shaped ears. They were adorable, actually, but she wasn’t about to tell him that.

The ear tugging escalated into a tickling/wresting match that involved pillows, Emma’s set of Jonas Brothers coasters, and using her Charlie’s Angels plates as frisbees. By the time they ended up in a heap on the couch, talk of dates was forgotten as they decided to binge watch Parks & Rec.

She absolutely did not care who he was taking to the charity ball anyway.

The past is gone but something might be found to take its place . . . Hey, jealousy.

When Walsh rang her apartment, Emma had to lift the skirts of her massive ball gown just to walk to the door. She was going to grumble and complain to her friends about the theme of this ball - An Enchanted Fairy Tale Evening - but secretly, she sort of liked this whole formal wear cosplay thing.

Except for what this corset was doing to her spleen.

“Walsh, what the hell?”

The man was standing there in the hallway wearing a black tux. He even had a corsage in a little plastic box like he was taking her to the prom.

He looked her up and down incredulously in a way that no woman wants to be looked at by a man taking her to a ball. His look was equivalent to the way a baby boomer rolled their eyes at a Potterhead dressed up for Dragon Con.

“I didn’t think you were serious about the themed thing.”

“Yes I was serious! Now we’re going to look ridiculous!”

“We will look ridiculous?”

His laugh died under Emma’s withering scowl. She grabbed her clutch and practically slammed her door behind her. “Let’s go.”

He never even told her she looked nice.

************************************************************

“Swan. You look . . . “

Emma gave Killian a quirk of her brow and a teasing smile as she curtsied somewhat awkwardly. “I know.”

“I mean . . . “ Killian walked around her (quite a feat, actually, the skirt was massive) admiring her at every angle, “you cut quite the figure in that dress, love, and red has always been my favorite color on you.”

Emma glanced at a scowling Walsh as Killian bent to kiss her hand. Well, it served him right. He should have gushed over her long before they arrived. Killian’s eyes met hers, and he winked.

“Okay, that’s enough pawing my date,” Walsh grumbled, giving Killian a slight shove. He flashed the other man a tight yet friendly smile to temper his words, but Walsh was clearly marking his territory. Emma crossed her arms over her chest before Walsh could tuck her hand into the crook of his arm. His jealousy was far from cute.

“Did Emma not tell you there was a theme?”

Walsh tilted his chin. “I’m a little past playing dress up.”

Emma’s jaw dropped, but Killian just chuckled. “Well, mate, looks like you’re the only one.”

He slapped Walsh on the shoulder just a tad harder than necessary and gave Emma another wink as he rejoined his date for the night. It was just Anna, who was practically his sister since Elsa married Liam, and the only reason she came with Killian tonight was because Kristoff came down with the flu.

Not that Emma cared who his date was, of course. However, she couldn’t deny how incredibly handsome he looked in a long, brown brocade coat with gold buttons and blue leather breeches. The white linen shirt beneath had just enough buttons undone to give him a rakish look, and she remembered their conversation about Prince Charming and Captain Hook. The man even had a gold sword at his hip.

“Could you, uh, get me a drink?” Emma asked Walsh, her throat dry.

The minute he was gone, there was a voice at Emma’s ear.

“If you stare at Killian any harder, he’s gonna burst into flames.”

Emma jumped, her heart giving a little lurch. “Shit, Rubes, don’t sneak up on me like that!”

“Not that I blame you,” Ruby continued with a smirk, “he makes a great prince, doesn’t he?”

Emma shook her head, but couldn’t help smiling at her friend. Ruby’s dress was your standard Renaissance festival garb, but what made her stand out was the crimson cape she’d draped over it. She also carried a little basket in lieu of a clutch.

“Little Red Riding Hood?”

Ruby’s bright red lips quirked in a flirty grin. “It’s a fairy tale.”

“So who’s your big bad wolf?”

Ruby rolled her eyes. “I came with Victor.”

“Rubes!”

“I’m between relationships, and I knew he would say yes.”

Emma shook her head, but before she could warn her friend any further regarding her on again, off again ex, Walsh was at her side with a flute of champagne.

“Thanks,” she told him, taking a sip.

“Hey, Walsh,” Ruby said, “I heard you were playing in the game tomorrow.”

Emma almost choked on her champagne. “You are?”

“Well, yeah,” he said with a shrug, “I’ve done some CPA work for Macmillan, and they were short a man. I was going to tell you.”

“Macmillan?” David asked as he walked up with Mary Margaret on his arm. They were dressed as Snow White and Prince Charming.

Naturally.

“SB is playing Macmillan in the first game.”

“Oh, well, be prepared for my girl to cheer against you.”

Emma gritted her teeth as Walsh planted a wet kiss to her cheek.

“She’s no one’s girl.” Killian’s eyes were laser focused on her as he joined the group, his jaw tight. Emma couldn’t decide if it was sweet or embarrassing. Walsh rocked back on his heels, chuckling nervously.

“Right, right, woman. I meant woman.”

“Woman,” Killian bit out sarcastically, his gaze still on Emma, “I don’t think your date understood the full meaning of my criticism, love.”

Emma stepped out of Walsh’s half-embrace before his fingers could dig any further into her waist. She stepped between him and Killian in what she hoped was a casual move.

“Why don’t we dance?” She widened her eyes slightly, hoping Killian would pick up on her silently begging him not to make a scene.

“He doesn’t get the first dance, I do!” Walsh’s voice rose slightly, indignant, as he grasped her by the elbow.

Emma saw Killian’s eyes flash, and she bit back a groan.

“Don’t grab her like that, mate.”

Emma was probably the only one who noticed the way he bit out that final word, and she was probably the only one who knew that his steely calm was way more dangerous than raising his voice would have been. She smoothly yanked her arm out of Walsh’s grasp and laid her hand gently on Killian’s shoulder.

“I can handle this,” she whispered.

“Hey!” Walsh snapped, his voice rising another octave. He knocked Emma’s hand off Killian’s shoulder, and that was the proverbial last straw. How had she not seen what an epic jerk this guy was until three dates in? She turned, fully prepared to slap Walsh across the face for daring to touch her yet again like he owned her.

Killian, however, beat her to it.

Faster than anyone could process it, Killian’s fist had connected with Walsh’s jaw, and the latter stumbled backwards before losing his balance and hitting the floor.

“Killian! What the hell?” Emma shouted, more because she’d missed her opportunity to hit Walsh herself than concern for her date. Then she noticed the hush fall over the room and saw the gaze of most of the party goers directed at them. She turned towards Killian then, her face burning with humiliation.

He was no longer looking at her, though, instead towering over Walsh with both fists clenched.

“You’re insane!” Walsh shouted at him, rubbing at his jaw. “She said you were her best friend, but clearly you’re fucking her too.”

Killian surely would have kicked the shit out of Walsh then, based on the fire in his eyes, but Regina chose that moment to step in. With the same terrifying grace she wielded so well in the office, she grasped both Emma and Killian by the upper arm with surprising strength.

“If I may have a word,” she hissed as she pulled them towards the ballroom entrance. Once in the hallway, she shoved them into the coatroom, slamming the door behind her. She turned to them then, leaning her back against the door and crossing her arms over her chest. She was dressed in a skin tight red velvet dress with a long train that pooled around her feet. Her blood red lipstick and blood red nails only added to the overall effect.

“I see you decided to go with Evil Queen instead of princess,” Killian quipped, “perfect choice, your majesty.”

“Shut it, Jones,” she snapped. If looks could kill, Emma was pretty sure she and Killian would have dropped dead right then. “Do you have any idea the groveling I had to do to get our company invited to this event? The last thing we need is you two causing a scene. Now either go back out there and be professional, or - “ Regina paused and smirked at the two of them, “fuck already and put us all out of our misery.”

She left then, leaving Emma red-faced with her jaw on the floor. Her hands fisted in her taffeta skirt, and she refused to even look at Killian. When he spoke, the teasing tone in his voice only made her angry.

“Little does she know -”

“Don’t. Even. Say it.”

Emma leveled him with a murderous glare of her own before stomping over to the door of the coat room. She tripped over her skirt in the process, which sort of ruined the whole tone she was going for, but she stubbornly squared her shoulders and reached for the doorknob. She threw a few more words at him over her shoulder, once again avoiding eye contact.

“Don’t follow me. Wait ten minutes and give me time to get Walsh out of here before you two go swinging your dicks around again.”

As she yanked the door open, Killian replied softly behind her, “As you wish.”

Cause all I really want is to be with you, feeling like I matter too. If I hadn’t blown the whole thing years ago, I might be here with you.

The only bright side to leaving the ball early with Walsh was that she actually got a good night’s sleep and didn’t have to worry about a hangover the next day.

And dumping Walsh - that was a bright side too.

A good night’s sleep with no hangover was definitely a positive when sitting in the bleachers in the blazing hot sun on a Saturday afternoon. She really couldn’t believe she was required to be here. At least the concession stand had decent onion rings.

“Emma!” Mary Margaret called out as she navigated the bleachers with a container of chili cheese fries in her hands.

“MM, thank God! I was starting to think I was the only one at SB who wasn’t in the game.”

“Well, to be honest,” Mary Margaret admitted as she took a seat next to Emma, “I would prefer to be out there. David is being a bit too overprotective right now.”

“Overprotective? Why?”

Mary Margaret beamed, a twinkle in her eye as she subtly rested her hand on her abdomen. Emma gasped.

“Are you serious?”

“You mean do I seriously have a Nolan bun in the oven? Yes, yes I do.”

Emma hugged her friend. “I’m so happy for you! I can’t believe David let you tell me.”

MM shrugged. “I told him if he was going to be this ridiculou, he better let me tell you the real reason I’m not in the game.”

Emma rolled her eyes. “Sounds like David. You’re not even showing, what could happen?”

“Please don’t ask your brother that question. He’ll give you a dozen scenarios, each one more ridiculous than the last. When I imagined him trailing behind me on the diamond like I might break, I decided to humor him rather than be humiliated. Besides, this morning sickness clearly isn’t fond of the heat. No one wants to see me puke all over the dugout.”

“Yet you’re eating chili cheese fries.” Emma arched both brows as she glanced from the greasy food, to her sister-in-law, and back again.

“There’s no rhyme or reason to morning sickness, Emma. This was the only thing on the menu that didn’t make me want to hurl. Oh, and fyi, I’d keep those onion rings downwind.”

“Thanks for the warning,” Emma quipped, moving her favorite junk food to her other side.

Mary Margaret waved to her husband, and David waved back. “That man looks so good in a baseball jersey.”

“Ew, sister here.”

Mary Margaret laughed around a cheesy fry. “Okay then, how do you think Killian looks in a baseball jersey?”

“I’m mad at him, if you haven’t noticed.”

“That has no bearing on how he looks in the damn uniform, Emma.”

The inning had just ended, and the SB players were returning to the dugout. Killian’s eyes fell on Emma’s, and he gave her a tentative smile and a small wave. Emma, her eyes safely hidden behind a large pair of sunglasses, ignored him. His way too expressive face made it clear that she may as well have shouted obscenities at him. She sighed.

“Can you just admit the man is madly in love with you?” MM groaned.

Emma had never been so thankful for sunglasses in her life. “Would everyone just stop? We’re close. Best friends. That’s it.”

“Right.”

“And not friends with benefits, despite what Rubes says. I don’t do that.”

“Oh, I know it,” MM deadpanned, “but don’t think everyone in the office hasn’t noticed the yearning looks and doey eyes.”

“I don’t yearn,” Emma muttered before shoving an onion ring in her mouth.

“Maybe, but he does.” Emma chanced a glance at MM. She was regarding her with a tender, almost pitying look on her face. She laid a hand on Emma’s arm. “And I think you’re just better at hiding it.”

“I don’t see any evidence that Killian is . . . is . . . “

“In love with you? God, you can’t even spit out the word!” MM gave a wry chuckle. “And no evidence? Are you insane? Every time there’s donuts in the break room, he makes sure to deliver a bear claw to your desk. With a note, I might add.”

“They’re just inside jokes, not love letters.” Emma snorted through her nose, but it came out somewhat pathetic.

“And last Valentine’s day,” MM continued, undeterred, “how many bags of conversation hearts did he go through to pick out every single one that said best friend?”

Emma couldn’t help smiling at the memory. “Ok, but it’s not like he picked out the ones that said True Love or Soulmate or something.”

“God, you are grasping at straws. You have to admit that -”

The crack of the bat resounded through the ball field, and Emma and MM abandoned their snacks and surged to their feet as Killian tossed the bat aside and ran towards first. They shouted and cheered as the MacMillan outfield ran to retrieve the ball and Killian rounded second.

“Oh no,” Emma whispered.

There, crowding third base, was Walsh.

“Is he allowed to do that?” MM asked.

Emma’s stomach protested all those onion rings as she saw the determined look on Killian’s face and Walsh’s stubborn stance. This was clearly not about baseball, but personal. A sickening feeling washed over her as Walsh leaned one shoulder forward just as Killian reached the base. Walsh drove his entire body into Killian, sending him sprawling to the dirt.

“What does he think this is, football?” MM screeched.

The blood drained from Emma’s face when Killian didn’t get up. She shoved her way down the bleachers, running full tilt out onto the field. The umpire was already heading that way, and play had ceased.

“What the hell, Walsh!” she screamed as she skid to her knees at Killian’s side. “This isn’t the fucking World Series!”

Part of her wanted to fling herself at the man and beat the crap out of him, but her desire to know that Killian was okay won out. She leaned over him, just as his eyes blinked open, squinting at the bright sun overhead.

“Hey, beautiful!” he said to her, his voice slurred, his eyes unfocused.

“Call 911!” Emma yelled at the players gathered around.

“Come on, Emma,” Will retorted, “it’s just a concussion.”

“Don’t argue with me, Scarlett, I swear to God! Just make the damn call!”

Killian started murmuring again, groping with his hand as if trying to find her. “I knew you cared - I mean, really cared. You love me, don’t you?”

Emma took his hand to still it’s frantic movements and held it tight. “Of course I do.”

“No,” he slurred, “I mean looooove.”

“911!” Emma barked, at who she didn’t care. Killian’s eyes were rolling back in his head, and why the hell did nobody but her care?

“Ems,” David said gently, “seriously, we’ll take him to the ER. No need for an ambulance.”

He and Robin each took Killian by the arm and helped him to his feet. Killian swayed and his head lolled. His eyes started to close, and Robin slapped his cheek a few times.

“Stay with me, mate.”

“Robin!” Killian crowed. “Did you know I love Emma?”

“Yes, Kil, I heard that.”

Emma glared at Ruby when she let out a snort. “Don’t even, Rubes!”

“What? I didn’t say a thing!”

Emma followed closely behind the men as they half walked, half dragged Killian across the baseball diamond and out to the parking lot. Mary Margaret was there, hovering around Killian like a mother bird.

“Watch his head!” she warned as they slid him into the back seat of her and David’s car. “Emma, stay back here with him.”

And just like that, Emma was in the back seat with Killian’s head in her lap. She kept having to slap his cheek to keep him awake. Without conscious thought, her fingers carded through his hair. Every time she patted his cheek, he mumbled more sappy, romantic nonsense. Thankfully, it was all G rated with no reference to the weekend they met. No need to tempt David to skip the hospital altogether.

“You know,” MM said with exaggerated thoughtfulness, “they say in moments like this, a person’s inhibitions are gone, enabling them to speak their truth.”

“Not the time, MM,” Emma told her through clenched teeth.

Mary Margaret just gave her a self-satisfied grin.

And you can trust me not to think, and not to sleep around. If you don’t expect too much from me, you might not be let down.

Emma sat in one of the uncomfortable hospital chairs made of molded plastic, shifting in a vain attempt to get comfortable. She kept clasping and unclasping her hands nervously. The look on Liam Jones’s face before going back to see his brother was worse than any look David had ever leveled at the men she had dated. It clearly said this is all your fault, Emma.

“Ignore Liam,” Elsa told her, putting a slender hand to her shoulder. “His overprotectiveness borders on insanity. How in the world could a concussion from a charity baseball game be your fault?”

Emma deflated, resting her head on Elsa’s shoulder. “No, in this case he’s right. It is my fault. If I had seen what a douchebag Walsh was earlier, Killian would have never punched him at the ball, and then Walsh would have never sent him crashing to the dirt.”

“Or,” Elsa amended, “you could have stopped pretending to be clueless and just accepted your feelings for Killian. Then you’d both quit making stupid decisions.”

Emma lifted her head from Elsa’s shoulder. “What is this? Can’t everyone cut me some slack?”

“We just all want you to be happy.”

“Who says dating Killian will make me happy? It could all blow up in our faces and then we don’t even have a friendship anymore.”

“Emma,” Elsa said gently, tucking a strand of hair behind her friend’s ear, “the deepest kind of love starts with friendship.”

Emma covered her face with both hands. Elsa didn’t know how it all started - no one did. When Killian had shown up at Storybook Biz with a cardboard box resting at his hip, Emma had played it cool. He probably thought she hated the night they’d spent together, or at the very least assumed it meant nothing to her. Now they were firmly stuck in the friend zone and she had no idea what to do about it.

Or maybe this concussion was a blessing in disguise? She groaned. For one, that was incredibly selfish of her, and for another, he most likely remembered nothing that he’d said to her.

“He’s asking for you.”

Emma rose quickly at the sound of Liam’s voice, then swayed at her sudden dizziness. She blinked to clear the spots in her vision. She suddenly realized she’d had no water since leaving the baseball field. Great, she was dehydrated and emotionally drained. Perfect.

“Take this and drink all of it,” Elsa commanded, pressing a water bottle into her hand. No wonder Elsa and MM had been blessed with husbands and babies. Taking care of people was embedded in their DNA.

Emma took a swig of the water as she headed down the hallway to Killian’s room. They had done an MRI already, confirming that it was a concussion, and a pretty severe one at that. He had been admitted to a room to stay overnight for observation. It made Emma sway again just thinking about it, and she took another sip of water to steady herself.

When she entered the room, Killian turned to her with a smile on his face. He looked odd in the hospital gown, his normal bravado toned down by the washed out, institutional garment. There was an IV in his hand, and sensors taped to his chest, and machines beeped. All of it combined to make tears spring to Emma’s eyes.

“Hey,” he told her, reaching out to take her hand as she neared the bed, “I’m fine.”

“No you’re not,” she choked out.

“Ok,” he conceded, “but I will be.”

She couldn’t speak, so she just squeezed his hand. He reached up with his free hand and scratched behind his ear.

“So about the stuff I said when I was . . . out of it.”

“Oh, don’t worry about that,” Emma assured him quickly, waving her hand as if swatting away so many flies. “You didn’t know what you were saying.”

Killian frowned as if her words hurt him. “Everything since I hit the ground is patchy, Emma, I’ll admit, but there’s one thing I do know. I was blabbering on about my feelings for you, all of which I definitely meant.”

Emma felt a sudden urge to run, but Killian tightened his grip on her hand, threading his fingers with hers. He held her hand a lot, but she gazed at their interlaced fingers as if she’d never seen them that way before.

“Now that those words are out, Emma, I refuse to take them back. I know that night at the wedding didn’t mean to you what it did to me, and I’m well aware that you deserve far better than the likes of me, but -”

“Excuse me?”

Killian blinked rapidly, his shock at her harsh tone clearly evident on his face. “Um . . . what?”

She pulled her hand away and crossed her arms over her chest. “Did you seriously just say that I deserve better than you?”

Killian’s gaze darted to the open door, as if hoping Liam would arrive and rescue him. “Uh . . . yes?”

“And did you also just say that the night we spent together meant nothing to me?”

Killian swallowed nervously, and Emma bit the inside of her cheek to keep the scowl on her face.

“I . . . yes, I said that, too.”

Emma propped her hands on her hips and tilted her chin. “I’ll have you know, Killian Jones, that I’ve replayed that night in my mind on numerous occasions.”

A half-smile quirked his lips. “Is that so?”

“Yes.”

He licked his bottom lip and arched one brow. “And why, may I ask, do you replay it so often?”

Emma gave him a half-smile of her own. “Because it was pretty damn good.”

Both of Killian’s brows rose. “Pretty good? Because I have to say, Emma Swan, that you’re the best I’ve ever had.”

Emma couldn’t stop the huge grin that split her face at that, and despite the IV and the narrow bed and all the beeping machinery, she launched herself at him. He caught her, successfully maneuvering all of the cords out of her way. She slanted her mouth over his, awkward and slightly sloppy. They both laughed, and Emma dug her fingers into his shoulders, resisting the urge to grab the back of his head. Damn concussion. She really loved his hair.

“You’re the best I’ve ever had, too,” Emma whispered against his collar bone. The hospital gown didn’t fit very well, and her lips met warm skin.

Killian reached up and buried his fingers in her hair. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

And when she said it, she didn’t hide against his chest or look away. She sat up, grasped his face with both hands and held his gaze. She let the words sink in, and then she pressed her lips to his again.

The past is gone, but something might be found to take its place.

#cs ff #cs modern au #fandom birthday playlist #for laura #on her birthday #now for the tags i am going to make up . . .#lovers to friends to lovers #one night stand becomes best friend becomes lover #jealousy #obviously #light angst #angst with a happy ending #hey jealousy

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captainswanbigbang · 5 years ago

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CSRT Author Spotlight: winterbythesea

Today’s Captain Swan Rewrite-a-Thon spotlight features @winterbythesea!

How long have you been writing for the OUAT fandom? Did you write anything else (original or fan fiction) before joining the OUAT fandom? Are you writing anything non-OUAT now that the show is over?

About 5 years! I wrote Star Wars fic before that, and original stuff. And that's still pretty much how it is now, I still write a bit of SW occasionally and I'm working on original stuff as well.

What sort of fic do you like to write? What sort of fic do you like to read?

My favourite thing to write is characters bantering, working together, understanding each other. I like stories with a bit of action, a bit of pining, and fun, with a balance between making you laugh and making you cry. I think my interests are pretty similar for reading and writing, overall, but I probably write more crack than I read, and read more smut than I write.

What kind of rewrite will you be doing?

Taking a story's premise but going in another direction with it ("canon divergence")

Tell us about your Rewrite-a-Thon story! What's it about, and why did you decide to rewrite it?

It's about Killian ending up in Hades aka the underworld, and Emma going after him to bring him back. That was the basic idea. I started writing it before the show ever went there, so when the show did go there, I sort of lost steam. It felt pointless, and CS on the show had developed as a couple in ways that made me feel like my take on it all was just off. I can't finish it as is, so I feel like this event is pretty much perfect for it. The plan now is to rewrite it with a completely different beginning, basically an alternative take on the Dark Swan arc, and then go from there. I feel like I've improved as a writer since I started it as well, so hopefully I'll do the idea justice this time around.

What are you most excited about when it comes to rewriting your story?

Actually getting to the Hades part! I just about sent Killian down there, but I never got around to writing the rest of it. So I'm excited to actually get to the bit I originally started the story for!

Check out @winterbythesea on Tumblr and AO3!

#captain swan rewrite a thon #csrt #author spotlights #CSRT spotlights #Captain Swan #winterbythesea

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welllpthisishappening · 6 years ago

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Where You Can Still Remember Dreaming (4/35)

Killian Jones, former crime reporter, was not happy to be home. It hadn’t been home in a very long time, after all. Home was an abstract construct that existed for people who didn’t know as many adjectives for blood as he did. Home wasn’t New York City, but it certainly wasn’t Boston or New Orleans either and he’d always gone where the story was. And he was positive Emma Swan was one hell of a story.

Emma Swan, pro video game player, desperately wanted to find home. She thought she had, a million years ago in the back corner of a barn and a town and faces she trusted. But that had all blown up in her face and it didn’t take long for her to decide she was going to control the pyrotechnics from here on out. So now she was in New York City and a different corner and she kind of wanted to trust Killian Jones.

Neither one of them expected a year of of video games and feature stories to dredge up old enemies and even older feelings, but, together, they made a pretty good team.

Rating: Mature. Word Count: 9.4 K of Emma Swan background and flirty text messages. AN: Hey, uh, let’s play some video games, huh? And learn why Emma didn’t really want a year-long feature story about her video game team. It’s time to try and qualify for the League (which is really a tournament, honestly) and I cannot thank you guys enough for the serious kindness you’ve shown in regards to this fic. It’s been incredibly nice. We’re just getting started. || Also on Ao3, FF.net and tagged up on Tumblr || Tag List: @jamif ; @alicerubyfloyd ; @courtneyshortney82 ; @jennjenn615 ; @artistic-writer ; @onceuponaprincessworld ; @kmomof4 ; @nikkiemms ; @resident-of-storybrooke ; @whumped-natascha-remi-ronin ; @coliferoncer ; @strangestarlighttree ; @tiganasummertree ; @game-of-once-upon-an-outlander (Let me know if you want to be tagged or don’t or, like, how your day is going.)

She wasn’t sure what was more annoying.

The very loud alarm she could hear a few inches away from her head, whatever David was shouting on the other side of the door or the horn honking just outside the window of her room. It wasn’t her room.

It wasn’t even really a room, per se.

It was a...corner.

And David wasn’t really on the other side of the door, he was on the other side of a partition that Mary Margaret ordered off Amazon for nineteen bucks a week before Emma had descended on their apartment with one suitcase in her hand and the hope that, maybe, this could work.

This had to work.

They’d find out in a few hours if it could.

A few hours from now, Emma would walk back into the apartment with one of two options in front of her – either she was as much of a complete failure as that tiny, nagging voice in the back corner of her brain promised her she was and even the idea of playing video games professionally was absolutely insane or, and this is where the hope came into play, she was the quasi-captain of the only all-female pro Overwatch team in the league and they were well on their way to splitting a four-million-dollar championship check with their names plastered across the internet and a string of feature stories written about them on The Daily Caller and and a national spotlight that would, maybe, lead to more money.

God, those feature stories.

God.

Killian Jones.

She was going to see Killian Jones that afternoon. And that didn’t terrify her. Absolutely not. She was worried about the game. And four million dollars. She couldn’t even imagine four-million-dollars, let alone imagine winning an inaugural tournament that promised just historic. Probably with a comically large check.

It had nothing to do with Killian Jones or how blue his eyes were or how she kept replaying that slightly awkward, slightly strained, undeniably sweet conversation they’d had the week before.

“Shit,” Emma mumbled, slamming her hand on her phone and promptly knocking it onto the floor. She could barely make out David’s laughter a few feet away and what sounded like cabinets slamming shut and she hadn’t actually turned her alarm off.

“You know,” David shouted, throwing what sounded like a pillow full of bricks at the partition. The whole thing shook, nearly falling on Emma and her air mattress and it would almost figure that she’d get taken down by nineteen dollars worth of plastic before she even stood up.

She needed to be more positive.

She needed to find her super cheesy team-branded t-shirt. That cost more than the plastic partition.

“Were you ever going to finish that sentence?” Emma called back, finally pushing herself off the air mattress and half of it had deflated during the night. That wasn’t a sign. God, her phone was still making noise.

David chuckled again, kicking at another cabinet and drawing the mumbled reprimand of Mary Margaret – who was absolutely going to be late for work so she could see Emma off or something equally maternal. “Yeah,” he said, padding across the apartment and leaning around the still-wobbling partition. “You need to learn how to control your electronics. And work on your hand-eye coordination. It sounded like you nearly knocked off your whole little compound over here.”

Emma scowled, but that was as good a word for it as any. She didn’t bring much with her to New York – didn’t have much to bring to New York – but David and Mary Margaret had offered up, at least, three quarters of their living room without question, pulling an ancient air mattress out of the closet and buying an entirely new bed-set, with a questionable amount of flowers on the sheets, and pushing the coffee table against the wall so Emma had somewhere to keep her phone and her laptop.

It was, exactly, what they’d always done.

And Emma would never get used to it.

“Compound Godzilla,” David continued, eyes bright and wide and far too confident. In her. He was confident in her. Even when he was insulting her and comparing her to lizard monsters.

“Yeah, but you’re the one who’s going to have to deal with the damages,” Emma reasoned. “So you know, in the grand scheme….” “Of? “Of whatever joke you’re trying to make. Very badly I might add.”

“That’s rude, Em,” David said, but there was a laugh just on the edge of his voice and Mary Margaret was already humming under her breath. It was so goddamn domestic Emma couldn’t quite believe it was real.

She shrugged. “You need to work on your jokes. These are getting stale. And you’re the only who nearly knocked over the partition. I just almost cracked my phone.” “Whatever,” he grumbled and Mary Margaret’s humming had turned into open laughter, far too well-acquainted with whatever early-morning war of words Emma and David were staging in the corner. “I’m not going to provide you with any caffeine or the vast array of breakfast pastries I’ve procured from the place down the block.” “Did you just swallow a dictionary?” “Thesaurus,” Mary Margaret corrected, flashing a smile over her shoulder and she’d already taken a shower. Emma hadn’t even heard her wake up.

There was probably a reason for that. That stupid voice in the back corner of her mind did jumping jacks, bouncing off the sides of her brain as it tried to grab Emma’s attention and provide an explanation she didn’t really want to her – because the kids in the foster homes always cried, quiet sniffles and even louder wails, wondering what they’d done wrong and when someone would decide they were enough and they could leave and, maybe, get just a bit warmer.

It always seemed to be freezing in those houses.

And, somewhere in between Hartford and Minnesota and a few weeks on the street in Boston, Emma had developed the ability to sleep through anything – crying or wailing or chattering teeth or, apparently, Mary Margaret taking a shower a few feet away.

“Em,” David said, tugging on the edge of her sleeve and jerking her out of the past. “You went all glossy for a second there. Was it because I totally impressed you with my vast and detailed vocabulary?” She rolled her eyes, taking a step towards the kitchen and accepting the mug Mary Margaret offered her. “I promise,” she said. “It had absolutely nothing to do with that.”

David’s smile wavered for half a moment and he shot Mary Margaret a nervous look, meaning flitting between them and nearly becoming another sentient being right there in their kitchen. Emma sighed. “Ok,” she mumbled, taking a sip of hot chocolate-coffee hybrid and they’d bought her cinnamon. She shouldn’t have been surprised. “That’s not what I meant it like.” “Are you nervous?” Mary Margaret asked softly, a picture of support and belief and something that felt like certainty. Emma clearly hadn’t gotten enough sleep.

“About the game?” Mary Margaret nodded. “No, no, I am absolutely not nervous about the game. We’re good and we’ve practiced a shit ton, enough to drive Granny absolutely insane and we don’t even have to win. Technically.” “You’re totally going to win.” Emma bit back her immediate response – a string of practicality and low expectations that absolutely did not belong in the same room as Mary Margaret Nolan.

She’d been part of the package deal that came with arriving in Storybrooke and life with the Nolans and enough love to almost make up for everything else.

Actually, arrived was generous. Emma had kind of stumbled into Storybrooke, nothing more than a few dollar bills stuffed into the back pocket of her ripped jeans and a blanket clutched tightly in her hands and she just needed somewhere to sleep. She didn’t expect to find a barn and a corner that was almost, nearly, sort of warm.

David found her the next morning, legs tucked up underneath her with her blanket under her head and hay stuck in her hair. Honest to God hay.

She’d run away. The house had closed a week before and there just wasn’t enough money to support a run-down building and a dozen orphans that no one wanted. Including the national government. Or maybe just Maine. Emma never could remember who was in charge of that.

It didn’t matter.

The only thing she’d known was they were going to move her again and she was just supposed to agree to Florida and another fresh start and she’d started running before she’d even really considered any other option.

She was going to run again as soon as David found her, hand balled up into a fist and halfway through the air when he held up his hands in surrender and asked what she was doing here and promised a hot meal and maybe a shower if she’d just follow him inside.

Mary Margaret was sitting at the kitchen table with Ruth when the door slammed shut behind Emma. She gave her a new set of clothes and, it seemed, Emma had found a family.

Even when she didn’t want it.

Especially when she didn’t want it.

“I know, I know,” Mary Margaret said, nudging her elbow into Emma’s side with a familiarity that made her stomach clench. “You only have to be in the top eight. Doesn’t mean I totally don’t think you’re going to absolutely wreck.” David nearly dropped his coffee. “Absolutely wreck,” Emma repeated slowly, eyes flashing up towards a determined Mary Margaret.

“Yes. Absolutely. And completely. C’mon. That’s a gaming term!” “You’re just digging yourself into an even deeper hole here, M’s. You are painfully uncool.” Mary Margaret stuck her tongue out, rolling her eyes dramatically and jumping onto the edge of the counter next to Emma. She rested her arm on Emma’s shoulder, elbow pushing into the side of her neck and it probably would have been uncomfortable it weren’t so normal and, not for the first time, Emma was glad she’d stumbled back into this life.

“She looked it up,” David whispered conspiratorially before taking a far-too-large bite of bagel and, somehow, smiling at Emma. Mary Margaret clicked her tongue in disapproval, but it wasn’t a disagreement either and Emma wondered when she’d had the time.

Probably in between attacking major website editors with plans and making sure Killian Jones wasn’t actually trying to kidnap two kids from a summer program with the promise of ice cream on his lips.

Shit.

Killian Jones.

Emma needed to drink more coffee and get some food in her and a slightly more professional mindset. There were rules about that, right? Ethics or something. A reporter wasn’t supposed to date whoever he was writing about.

No, probably not. Definitely not. And she wasn’t thinking about dating Killian Jones or or a sentence that included both Killian Jones and lips or even really talking to Killian Jones – far too focused on the game and winning and keeping her personal life, decidedly, personal.

She could be a good story without the depressing history and vaguely troubled past.

Definitely not.

Primary fire, secondary fire, obliterate every enemy – and that stupid, annoying, asshole voice in the back of her brain. It would be fine. She probably wouldn’t really even notice him. For the entire goddamn day.

“I think she’s playing the game,” David muttered, pouring another cup of coffee and, God, he’d showered too. How had she slept through all of that?

“I’m thinking what the best way would be to take you out,” Emma lied and David didn’t look like he believed a single letter of it.

“I bought you baked goods. A plethora of baked goods.” “That was actually kind of nice,” she conceded. Her drink had gone cold. “God damn. Although there are a questionable number of cinnamon-raisin in there. What time did you have to get up to make that happen?”

David shrugged. Painfully early, then. “It’s an important day, Em,” he reasoned. “And maybe I just wanted cinnamon-raisin for the week.” “Yuh huh.” “How come you don’t have to actually win to win?” “We’ve been over this twenty times already,” she sighed, but she kind of appreciated too. If Emma kept running the plan, the one that decidedly ignored Killian Jones and his far-too-blue eyes and nicknames and on-the-record questions, then she could stay focused on the goal. She could absolutely wreck – as Mary Margaret would say.

“Humor me.” She took a deep breath and Mary Margaret reached over her shoulder, tugging the mug out of her hand to fill it with scalding hot liquid. God, it was like being fifteen again. Emma was a better video game player now.

“It’s a qualifying tournament,” Emma started. “So there are sixteen teams today, from all over the world, who didn’t get the automatic bid. It’s because none of us have fancy, corporate sponsors and we’re some kind of Overwatch plebs in the eyes of the league, so, they put us in a different bracket and make us play each other.

The seeds coming into this were a total joke though. They, literally, just put our team names into a hat and that Zelena lady who’s in charge of everything picked out pieces of paper and that’s where we ended up.”

David snorted over the top of his mug and he’d mixed peanut butter and cream cheese on his cinnamon raisin bagel. Emma tried not to actually gag. “Ruby’s very mad about that,” he said. “She’s brought it up every single time I’ve talked to her in the last forty-eight hours.” “How many times are you talking to her in the last forty-eight hours?” “A couple,” he mumbled and it sounded a bit like an admission. Emma’s pulse accelerated and she was positive she was missing something. David’s nervous glance towards Mary Margaret all but confirmed it and they were talking about her. God.

“Yuh huh,” Emma repeated, eyebrows pulled low and frustration brewing in the pit of her stomach and she was fairly positive they were talking about that phone call she’d made on the other side of the plastic partition on Friday night.

She was going to kill her whole goddamn team.

“And what seed are you guys?” Mary Margaret asked quickly, trying to refocus the conversation and keep Emma from throwing things in the middle of her kitchen.

“We are fifth,” Emma answered and maybe she was as upset as Ruby was about this whole seeding debacle. Maybe Killian Jones, award-winning reporter with a history Emma was positive was also a story, should write about that.

That, however, would require her to talk to him long enough to suggest story ideas.

What a mess.

“And playing?” David prompted. Emma rolled her eyes. They’d really gone over this twenty times already, had discussed it in detail in the back corner of Granny’s on Saturday night, Ruby’s voice rising with every sip of alcohol until she and Anna seemed to be having some kind of joint screaming match over seeding.

“Vivi’s Adventure,” Emma responded, dropping her head against Mary Margaret’s side and sighing softly when she felt fingers working their way through her hair. “It’s the dumbest name in the history of dumb names and that’s coming from someone who might actually have a lawsuit on her hands if we actually make it out of qualifying rounds.” “You can’t change your name,” Mary Margaret said. She was braiding Emma’s hair. And Emma didn’t move her head.

“I’d rather not get sued for four million dollars before I even get the chance to try and win four million dollars. That’s impractical.”

“But you made shirts,” David pointed out.

“Ruby made shirts. Or ordered shirts. No one asked her to do that.” “Are you even remotely surprised that she did that?” “About as surprised as you getting up insanely early to go get me bear claws from a bagel place that makes the best bear claws in the city.” David grinned at her, ducking his head to press a kiss on Emma’s temple and maybe being fifteen again wasn’t the worst thing in the entire world. “It’s only because we live a few blocks away,” he promised. “Any more than five blocks and I totally wouldn’t have done it.”

“No, then he would have called an Uber and woken up even earlier,” Mary Margaret mumbled.

Emma’s pulse sped up again, heart hammering against her ribs with something that felt like emotion and maybe sentiment and she couldn’t just start crying on Mary Margaret’s actual shoulder. That would have been weird.

Probably.

Mary Margaret wouldn’t have blinked.

She was, after all, used to that sort of thing. And David would have woken up at dawn to get Emma bear claws if he had to, if only to prove that she had people behind her and support in her corner and a slew of other athletic-based clichés that made her vision swim just a bit.

David hadn’t just gotten her to come into the house all those years ago. He’d gotten his mom to agree to Emma and everything that she came with – a mess of legal battles and paperwork and enrolling her in Storybrooke High that fall.

And she’d had her own room, across the hall from David, and Mary Margaret had helped her fill out a closet, the very first she’d ever owned, and the three of them spent the entire year together, the memories of those days still hanging in frames on the walls in Ruth’s house.

It had been good. It had been perfect – some kind of storybook lifestyle for a town with an absurd name and Emma could never quite believe her luck.

So, naturally, she’d gone and ruined the whole thing.

She had a tendency to do that. And David graduated, got into the University of Maine and that was hours away and Mary Margaret was gone as well, that perpetual smile and positivity that Emma had allowed herself to depend on in just a few, short months, limited to phone calls and text messages.

They promised they’d come back. They’d drive back down for weekends and Emma could come up and sleep on Mary Margaret’s floor, but Emma was sure – it was all over. So she ran. Again.

She was an idiot.

Only David and Mary Margaret found her. Again. And again. Over and over, every single team she absolutely fucked it all up, there they were, encouraging smiles on their faces and certainty in their stare and, usually, baked goods in their hands.

Shit, she’d totally started crying on Mary Margaret’s shoulder.

“Em,” David said slowly, eyes wide and hand falling on her forearm. “Are you crying? God, you’re totally crying. What’s the matter?” Emma shook her head, some of the braid Mary Margaret had already finished falling apart in the process, but the evidence was on her cheeks and her slightly puffy eyes and she could hear her phone buzzing from her compound a few feet away.

“That’d be totally lame,” she mumbled, dragging her knuckles across her face.

“The lamest. Is it because I put peanut butter and cream cheese on my bagel?” “That’s totally it,” Emma agreed and her voice was still shaky and just a bit scratchy, but David didn’t push, just tugged her away from the edge of the counter and wrapped his arms around her tightly. His hand found the back of her head, cupping her hair as he mumbled something that might have been encouragements in her ear, but Emma couldn’t really think when he did that, the actual feel of self confidence enveloping her as soon as she pressed her forehead into the crook of his neck.

“Five seed’s a good underdog story,” David continued, leaving another kiss on the crown of her head. “Tell your reporter guy to lede with that.” “Not my guy,” Emma mumbled. There it was. She was, almost, surprised it had taken them that long to get there. David had absolutely been gossiping with Ruby. “And,” she added. “He’s the one who’s won awards, doesn’t seem like it’s my place to tell him how to write his story.” “Yeah, but it’s about you. He should take that into account.” “Are you trying to protect me from the big world of journalism, Detective?” David pulled back, face turning serious quicker than Emma expected and that shouldn’t have surprised her either. “Yes,” he said simply and Mary Margaret made some kind of noise of agreement in the back of her throat.

“M’s, this was your idea,” Emma said, glancing over her shoulder. Mary Margaret shrugged. “And I still think it’s a good idea. He really did seem excited about it when I saw him on Friday. Even if he was being kicked in the side.” “I’m sorry, what?” “He was holding Roland. Or trying to, at least. I’ll tell you something though, Roland Locksley has never been more excited to have someone pick him up from summer camp than he was when Killian Jones showed up. He’s not nearly that enthusiastic about the assistant.” “You’ve lost me. And how old is this kid?” “Regina Mills’ assistant,” Mary Margaret explained. “She’s usually the one who gets the kids. Although Robin comes sometimes too. He’s nice. Better with the kids than the assistant. She always looks kind of stressed out.” “And did anyone mention why Killian Jones was picking up these kids? Or how he knows them enough to offer them ice cream?” “I don’t think you need to be well acquainted with kids to offer them ice cream,” David reasoned, one arm still slung over Emma’s shoulders as she tried to twist around and stare at Mary Margaret.

“That’s true,” Mary Margaret agreed. “But I don’t think that’s what was happening. He knew those kids. Like in a part of the family kind of way. They had nicknames and everything. It was painfully adorable.” “Jeez, that’s just like a thing for him isn’t it?” Emma asked, the words flying out of her mouth before she could even really consider them. Mary Margaret’s eyebrows practically jumped off her face.

“What?” “Nothing.” “Emma Swan.” She growled or groaned or maybe wondered if she could get out of the conversation without having to talk about any of this. No such luck. “He’s just got this nickname thing,” Emma muttered. “When he talk.” “Right,” Mary Margaret said, smile tugging on the sides of her mouth. Emma’s phone was still buzzing. “And you know this because…” “I’ve had two conversations with him.” “No, of course. Two conversations. You talk to him since that second conversation?”

Emma narrowed her eyes, pressing her lips together and ducking out from underneath David’s arm. “I’ve got to shower,” she said, already halfway towards the bathroom. “Ruby’s going to murder me if we’re late.”

It didn’t matter – Emma walked out of the bathroom ten minutes later, damp hair still wrapped in a towel, to find Ruby sitting cross-legged on the couch with a controller in her hand and a disgruntled David a few feet away from her.

“Why are you so bad at this?” she laughed, not moving her eyes away from the screen and David made some kind of impossible noise, trying to elbow her in the thigh.

“Why are you so good at this? And how do you keep getting all these bananas? Oh, shit, shit, fuck, God, stop laughing, Lucas.” “I’m sorry, this is just hysterical. It’s like the game got better and suddenly you’re complete shit at MarioKart.” She dropped another banana behind her and David let out another string of curses as he skidded off the course again, throwing his head back towards the ceiling and damning Ruby to several different afterlives, including, what sounded like, the seventh circle of Hell.

“For betrayers and mutineers,” Emma intoned, not quite able to keep the laughter out of her voice when David actually chucked his controller at the ground. Mary Margaret didn’t even look surprised.

“Stop quoting things at me, Em,” he hissed. Ruby lapped him. “God, Lucas, seriously. Stop showing off. It’s just embarrassing.” “For you or me?” Ruby asked, swinging her legs back onto the floor and she’d already won. She took a step towards Emma, eyeing the shirt she’d begrudgingly put on, and grinning, confidence practically rolling off her in waves. “I told you the shirts were worth the money,” she said pointedly, tapping on the emblem they’d gotten Anna to draw nearly a month before. “And it’s absolutely embarrassing for you, Nolan. I know I’m good.” David sighed again, dropping down onto the floor and pulling one leg up until he looked like a Renaissance painting – of MarioKart 8 defeat. “We shouldn’t have bought the new one,” he mumbled. “I was better at the classic version.” “Yeah, keep telling yourself that. Hey, did you get Emma bear claws for good luck this morning? I’m starving.” “Stop stealing my baked goods,” Emma said, but Ruby was already in the kitchen and Mary Margaret was already pouring another cup of coffee and they were going to be, at least, twenty minutes late. It was going to take forever to get crosstown.

“Too late,” Ruby said, mumbling through a mouthful of bear claw. “Have we complained about the seeding for this qualifying thing yet this morning because I’d really like to complain about that again.” “Too late,” Emma repeated. Ruby sighed. “How come you’re here? I didn’t think you were coming here. Are the rest of them coming here?” Ruby shook her head, confusion flashing across her expression when she glanced towards Mary Margaret. Emma tried not to groan. “You don’t know?”

“Know what?” “There’s a car outside.” “What?” “Automobile. Vehicle. Motor car. A sweet set of wheels.” Mary Margaret laughed loudly, the sound working its way across the entire apartment as Emma practically sprinted towards the window. Ruby was right. There was a car outside and a uniformed man leaning against the passenger’s side door, feet crossed at the ankles and a hat in his hand like he’d wandered straight off a movie set.

“What the hell is that?” Emma asked sharply, not sure why she was, suddenly, terrified by the answer.

“Did you not hear my sweet set of wheels explanation?” Ruby asked. “I can’t really come up with another synonym. You can ask your reporter when we get to the Theater. He’s probably got more. That’s his job, right?” Emma shook her head, mind muddled and thoughts moving slowly and she needed to dry her hair. And look at her phone. Oh fuck, her phone. She moved again, actually running across the several hundred square feet of apartment and nearly knocking over the partition while Ruby mumbled something her breath at Mary Margaret.

She had six text messages and she’d never actually programed his number in her phone, but she recognized the 718 area code and her heart might have actually been in her throat.

Good luck today, Swan.

Not that I think you’ll need it. You’re absolutely going to wreck the competition. God, that’s the lamest way to say that isn’t it?

Definitely lame.

True though. Even if that five-seed seems kind of absurd since your team actually has a pretty impressive win-loss record.

How did you end up a five seed? It doesn’t make any sense. This Vivi’s team hasn’t even won a competitive game yet. And they’re a four. This is just basic math. Even Singularity is garbage. And they’re the No. 1? You’ve got more wins than them. This is absurd.

Emma bit her lip, suddenly aware of the smile on her face and the way her breath had caught in her throat, knees not quite as straight as they’d been a few minutes before. He might be more upset about the five-seed debacle than Ruby and David combined.

And Emma could nearly imagine what his voice sounded like, the way he tried to rush over the words when he started talking about something he cared about and there was a sudden and distinct lack of oxygen in her compound at even the passing idea that he cared about her.

That was insane.

Impossible.

That was impossible. There were ethics involved. And one more text message.

The car’s for you, by the way. Courtesy of Mills Media. And how shitty the MTA is this summer. Just figured it’d be easier.

Was she still standing? She was. She might not have been breathing, but she was definitely still standing and somewhere in the realm of swooning until she suddenly and quickly got very, very frustrated.

She didn’t need a car. She didn’t need text messages from a phone number she, admittedly, probably should have saved on Friday night. She could walk crosstown quicker than the car could drive there.

Ethics.

And a deep-rooted stubborn streak that was probably her undoing. Or something less dramatic.

“Em,” Ruby said, approaching cautiously and that might have been the strangest thing that had happened all day. “M’s wants to know if you want her to braid your hair so we can get out of here. We probably shouldn’t keep that fancy driver guy waiting. Seems like a dick move.” Emma hummed noncommittally in the back of her throat, stuffing her phone in her pocket. “We’re not taking the car,” she said and Ruby’s eyes widened. “That’s...how did he even get Mary Margaret’s address?”

“I have no idea. But, like, that’s a thing, right? Investigative journalism or whatever?” “Are we the investigation?”

“Eh,” Ruby wavered, teeth bared as she tilted her head slightly. “Maybe not we.” Emma sighed, any sense of swooning as deflated as the air mattress at her feet. “That was almost kind of heavy-handed, don’t you think?”

“I almost don’t care. You should have heard David’s must protect Emma speech on Saturday night. You want to talk about heavy-handed, that was, like, the single most awkward conversation I’ve ever had and, once, Anna tried to tell me about how she nearly got engaged to a Tindr date the same night she met him.”

“What? God, I can’t imagine Elsa would be very into that idea.” “She wasn’t. There was, apparently, a fight if you can believe those two actually fought about anything in their lives and, just, trust me, it was weird and David is worried about you and these stories and he hasn’t told Mary Margaret about that and I’m not supposed to tell you either and Killian Jones blushed while holding a painfully adorable kid as soon as someone mentioned your name on Friday night.” “Were you not supposed to tell me that part either?” Emma asked archly, tugging her hair out of the towel.

“No, that’s painfully obvious. Everyone knows that.”

“Jeez. You are on a roll.” Ruby shrugged, but there was a tinge of disappointment in her gaze and Emma licked her lips. “We’re really not going to take the car?” “We’re really not going to take the car,” Emma said, the weight of her phone practically dragging her through the entire apartment building. “C’mon. Let’s go over strategy while M’s fixes my hair.” She did feel kind of bad about blowing off the driver – fancy hat clutched tightly in his right hand when Emma promised they were fine with walking and Ruby grumbled under her breath about it for the entire thirteen block walk to the Playstation Theater.

Emma ate another bear claw.

And tried not to drop the two cups of coffee gripped tightly in her hands.

She heard her name on the other side of the block, Anna’s hair obvious even in a sea of professional video game players and spectators and frantic-looking league reps who, clearly, had no idea what they’d gotten themselves into. Emma waved, hoping that would, somehow, stop the screeching from the other side of 44th Street, but it only seemed to drive Anna forward even more and, suddenly, she was nearly a foot taller, held up by a pair of hands that looked vaguely familiar.

She was clinging to Will Scarlet’s side, one of his arms wrapped tightly around her waist while she balanced herself on his shoulder and waved at Emma like she was trying direct several planes. And Killian Jones was very obviously staring at his feet a few inches away, a pen stuck behind his ear and something that might have been a credential around his neck and two cameras hanging off his left arm.

Emma bit her lip. And tried not to focus on the obscene amount of sugar she’d already ingested that morning.

“We should have taken the car,” Ruby muttered again, dragging Emma with her across the street as soon as the light changed.

“Emma, Emma, Emma,” Anna chanted, pulling herself away from Will and grabbing Emma by both her shoulders. Killian’s eyes darted up, one side of his mouth ticking up when he saw she was holding coffee. “You are missing everything. There has already been trash talking and people screaming into NY1 cameras and Tink totally dated the guy who’s Singularity’s captain and she said…”

Anna paused for half a moment to take a breath and Emma allowed herself one, quick glance towards Killian Jones. God, he was unfairly attractive. That was making this far more difficult than it should have been. Anna was still talking, detailing how Tink knew some guy named Greg and how shitty he was at playing Overwatch and how they were totally going to wreck and Emma barely heard any of it, lips dry again and both of her hands were burning from the somehow-still hot coffee.

Killian smiled at her, soft and maybe just a bit nervous and Emma tried to keep her expression neutral. It probably didn’t work if Anna’s continued exclamations were any indication. “Emma, are you ok?” she asked and Emma’s head darted up at the concern in her voice.

Elsa narrowed her eyes knowingly and Emma was struck with the rather sudden realization that they’d all talked about this. God, there was probably a group text. David had probably started it.

“I’m fine,” Emma promised. “NY1 is really here?” “It’s apparently an event,” Elsa said, a smile on her face as she waved a hand at the scene in front of her.

That was, definitely, one word for it. There were people everywhere, some of them already lined up in front of the doors to the Theatre and even more pushing their way down the block, cups of Starbucks clutched tightly in their hands and they weren’t the only team with matching t-shirts. That didn’t make Emma feel any better about the matching t-shirts.

Killian still hadn’t said anything, but Will was taking pictures and Emma tried not to be completely overwhelmed by everything around her. So, naturally, her eyes darted towards Killian again and that stupid, confident smile on his face. “You didn’t take the car,” he said slowly, muttering the words quietly enough that it was a conversational miracle Emma even heard him.

Emma rocked on her heels, not sure how to respond to a statement and Ruby elbowed her in the side – hard. “Ow,” Emma hissed, but Ruby just glared at her. “What the hell?” “Here,” Ruby said, ignoring Emma completely and pushing something into Killian’s chest. He didn’t move, didn’t even flinch, just glanced down and the smile turned just a bit more genuine.

“I didn’t think you’d remember,” he said. Ruby shrugged. Oh, God, it was a matching t-shirt.

“Please. Although seeing as we are an all-female team, this is absolutely not going to fit you and is now a gift for Henry wherever he is.” Emma nearly dropped the coffee again, stammering slightly and growling at Will when he pushed a camera lens in her face. “Wait, what? Henry like the one in Mary Margaret’s class?” Killian nodded. “What is going on right now?” As if on cue, a kid who couldn’t have possibly been more than twelve years old, skidded to a stop in front of them – both Will and Killian reaching out an arm to brace him. “Hook,” he shouted, head snapping up towards Killian. “You’ve got to come inside. There’s this whole table of merch and you can get a credit for download bundles to get new skins for characters and…”

His shoulders heaved when he ran out of oxygen, eyes wide when he realized there were two other people around now, but he smiled when he noticed Ruby. And Emma felt incredibly out of place. “Hey, Rubes,” Henry said brightly, ducking underneath Killian’s arm and only muttering slightly when she pulled him against her side.

“Hey, kid,” Ruby grinned. “You know you don’t need to get credits for that bundle. We’ll get you that in, like, a couple hours tops.” “Really?” Ruby nodded seriously, holding one hand out and Henry wrapped his pinky around her outstretched finger. “Let us wreck this qualifying tournament and then for sure.” “God, will everyone stop using the phrase wreck in regards to this tournament,” Emma groaned, feeling half a dozen curious eyes land on her. Killian grinned.

“Who else is using that?” Ruby asked and Emma tried to brush her off, nodding towards Henry instead. “Oh, right, right, Henry, this is Emma Swan. She’s our team captain and the best goddamn Overwatch player in the country. She could get you your codes in a couple minutes.” Henry’s eyes lit up and Emma bit her lip tightly, hoping the blush she could feel on her cheeks wasn’t too obvious. “It’s really nice to meet you,” Emma said honestly. “You were in Mary Margaret, uh, Mrs. Nolan’s class last year, right?”

“Yeah,” Henry nodded. “She used to ask me about the game all the time last year. She, uh, she knew I played and I told her about my mom.” It was some kind of miracle Emma hadn’t dropped the coffee. She glanced back at Killian – as struck as she was, with wide eyes and a half-open mouth and Will was still taking pictures. “Thanks,” Emma mumbled, not sure what else to say. Henry’s smile got even bigger.

“We should probably go inside,” Elsa said. The line outside the door was starting to move and they were definitely running late already, but there was some semblance of a schedule and Emma really just wanted this first match to be over.

She nodded, more than willing to let Elsa direct them into the main room and a check-in table and, of course, she’d just fallen into step with Killian. She could nearly feel him next to her, something that felt a bit like heat and almost like electricity radiating off him and he took a deep breath before she interrupted him completely.

“This is for you,” Emma said brusquely, holding her hand up expectantly and his lips twitched again. That was distracting. “I...I should have started with that. Buried the lede or whatever.” He laughed softly, taking short, measured steps so he didn’t move in front of her and his fingers were warm when they brushed over Emma’s. “Was that a journalism joke, Swan?” “A pretty good one, I think. Mostly because I don’t know any other journalism terms to make jokes with.” “Nothing?” Killian asked skeptically. He needed to stop looking at her. And talking to her. And asking questions. There was already an Overwatch game happening on the main screen. “Byline? Deadline? Something about quotes?” Emma rolled her eyes, taking a sip of coffee. “Congratulations on proving your ability to just shout out keywords regarding your job. Although I’m not accepting something about quotes.” “Too broad, huh?” “Exactly that.” “Noted,” he grinned and he hummed softly when he gulped his own coffee. “This is good.” “I’m not trying to poison you.” “Noted, again. And appreciated. If I ask you an actual question are you going to try and turn me to stone again?” Emma stopped walking, whoever was behind her nearly colliding with her back and she did drop the coffee. It was about time. “Oh, shit,” she mumbled, dropping down and one of her knees landed directly in a puddle of caffeine and two-percent milk.

Maybe this event wasn’t quite as much a disaster as Emma assumed – a person with a League Official t-shirt on appearing beside her quickly and there was a mop and promises that it was fine and Emma found herself being pulled back up before she even realized Killian had moved.

God, his hand was warm.

“Come here, love,” he said softly, wrapping his fingers around her wrist and tugging her away from the crowd. She followed him before she could come up with an argument, ducking behind the merch table Henry had been so excited about and it was, almost, quiet there.

“I’m fine,” Emma snapped, pulling her hand away quickly and wincing when it collided painfully with her side. He hadn’t even asked a question yet.

Killian nodded. “I’m not questioning that. Here,” he added, pushing his half-finished cup towards her. “You need the caffeine more than I do.” “Are you trying to tell me I look tired?” “No. I’m telling you that you’re the one who has to win an entire qualifying tournament today and that it only seems fair you to get at least some coffee out of the equation when, I’m assuming, you paid for it.”

Oh. She really was an asshole. And far too certain things were just going to go wrong by default. Mary Margaret would have some kind of hope speech perfectly prepared for this moment. Emma kind of wished she’d come with them.

“Not everything is some kind of calculated attack, Swan,” Killian added, ducking back into her eye line and smiling when she took the cup.

“What was your question?” she asked. His coffee didn’t have cinnamon in it. Damn.

“Why didn’t you take the car?” “Why did you send a car?” Killian shook his head, tongue pressed against the edge of his lip and Emma didn’t think she imagined the way he rocked towards her. “I asked first,” he said. “There are rules.” “I think you’re just making them up as you go along.”

“And I think you’re doing a very bad job of avoiding the question.”

She flashed her eyes up, but he didn’t back down, just lifted his eyebrows and stared straight at her, like he could read her mind or maybe like she was the open book he promised she was. Emma sighed. “I’m perfectly capable of walking a couple of blocks.” “I’m not questioning that.” “You really need to be more specific then.” Killian tilted his head – and Emma tried to keep her shoulders straight and her spine in line and she couldn’t remember having ever been looked at like that, like he was interested and intrigued and like he wanted to know everything, on the record, with absolutely no intention of putting it on the internet.

“I’m not one to just...accept things,” Emma said slowly. Killian didn’t respond, just moved his eyebrows again and kept staring at her. No, she thought, waited. He was waiting for her. “Especially from people I don’t really know. Who should have no idea where to send town cars.”

“Ah,” he laughed, running a hand through his hair and twisting slightly so his left arm was pulled behind his back. “Yeah, that was bordering somewhere on stalking wasn’t it?” “How did you do it?” “The receptionist at Mills is actually some kind of secret coding and internet expert. And she was very willing to do me a favor if I got Gina to get her and her boyfriend a reservation at TAO on Saturday night.” “The receptionist?” Emma repeated and Killian made a significant face. “You got a receptionist to...what, hack into some sort of record and find M’s address?” “She’s not trying to be the receptionist apparently. It’s a very involved story. But she saved the website on Friday and kept Robin from actually pulling his hair out or having some kind of episode in the middle of Broadway. So, you know, Gina owed her.” “You keep saying all these names and I have no idea who you’re talking about,” Emma admitted, appreciating his smile a lot more than she should have. “Gina is Regina Mills, right?” Killian nodded. “And Robin is…” “Her husband.” “Which makes Henry…” “Their kid. One of two. Roland is seven and obsessed with chocolate-chip cookie dough ice cream and being Henry.” Emma nodded in understanding, pieces of the puzzle, almost, starting to fit together. “And you know both of these kids well enough to pick them up from school, offer them ice cream in a not-creepy kind of way and then bring one of them with you on an assignment?” “Yes, yes and yes,” Killian answered. “Although Gina wasn’t happy about that last one. It’s apparently not very education-focused.” “It’s summer.” “My argument exactly, Swan.” She’d finished her coffee. Or his coffee. Emma wasn’t sure of the specifics anymore, trying not to linger on the fact that they’d somehow managed to share one cup of coffee that morning.

It felt like something important.

Emma turned her head, staring straight at him and maybe that was a mistake. Shit, his eyes were blue. He still had his arm twisted around behind him. “And you wanted to send me a town car to go thirteen blocks because…”

“It was a gesture of goodwill,” he grinned. “So you could get here easier.” “There wouldn’t be anywhere to park on 44th Street. How did Ruby know about it?”

“I have no idea.” He wasn’t lying – eyebrows pulled low and gaze intent and he wanted her to believe him. She didn’t. Jeez.

“I feel like we’re both missing a pretty big part of this game,” Emma muttered, taking a step towards him and she was close enough that her toes nearly brushed up against his sneakers. She could have moved, could have pulled her hands up and rested them flat against his chest like she wanted to and pressed her lips against his and maybe she’d thought of that a questionable amount since she’d swallowed some of her pride on Friday night and called him.

She didn’t do any of that.

Because Emma Swan never got in the car – metaphorically or otherwise. Not anymore.

“How did this happen, Swan?” Killian asked suddenly and she realized they’d been standing in silence, staring at each other like they were taking inventory for far too long.

Emma licked her lips quickly, tugging them back behind her teeth as she tried to regain her bearings. She could make out the sounds of the game behind her, catchphrases that had been playing on an endless loop in her brain since they’d decided to do this, and she tugged self consciously on her t-shirt.

“What?” she asked a bit breathlessly. Killian’s gaze shifted, dropping away from her eyes and, maybe, down towards her mouth, but then he blinked and it was gone as soon as it came, features stoic and professional and good, she could deal with that.

“On the record,” Killian said, a recorder held loosely in his right hand.

Oh. Well, yeah, no, that was ok. They had to do that, right? He had to ask questions and write stories and that was the deal. That was what Emma had begrudgingly agreed to when Mary Margaret announced the plan and Ruby promised it was good for business like that even made sense in context, but they’d taken a team vote and Emma had been overruled and now she needed to answer questions.

On the record.

“Ask me an actual question,” Emma hissed, frustration back in her voice and there went flirting. If flirting had ever been on the table. Jeez.

“How did Emma Swan become the team captain of the only all-female pro Overwatch team in the league?” Killian asked. “Or, rather, how did you start playing video games?” “That’s a long story.” “I’ve got some time. And so do you. Your shitty five-seed matchup isn’t for another hour.” “Why do you know that?” “I can read, Swan. There was a schedule on the league site and something about streaming. You’re still not answering my question.” He shook the recorder slightly and Emma’s stomach flipped. She swallowed back the bundle of nerves in her throat, chewing on her lip as she tried to figure out the best way to answer. Killian nodded once, like he was agreeing to an idea he hadn’t voiced, and leaned towards Emma, half an inch away from her face and what was personal space when she could barely think?

“I’ll tell you what, love,” Killian said, low and intent and Emma could feel it. “We’ll go one-for-one, huh? On the record back and forth. You answer my questions and I’ll answer yours. No matter what.” She hadn’t been expecting that. “Why?” Emma asked sharply. It was an accusation. And Killian knew it. “We both need this to work, Swan. You asked me about Boston and what led me back to New York, well, this is it. A story. A good one. So I need this to work and your team needs the publicity. It’s a win-win for both of us, we might as well be honest with each other.” “You have a very high opinion of this whole situation don’t you?” Killian shrugged. “I think we could make a very good team, Swan. It’s up to you whether or not that works.” Emma considered that for a few moments, scowling when she realized he was absolutely and infuriatingly right. Damn. On the record. “My brother,” she said. “He’s the reason I’m here.” “Give a guy a second to get his recorder out, Swan,” Killian grinned, hitting a button on the square of plastic in his hand. She rolled her eyes. “Ok, brother. I’m going to guess he’s the reason behind the NYPD shirt before?” “Why do you remember that?” “Perceptive. And a journalist. It’s the details, love. So you and your cop brother started playing video games when you were kids?”

“No,” Emma said and Killian did something absurd with his eyebrows. “Ruth bought him a knockoff XBox for Christmas one year and we spent the entire break playing. Turns out I’ve got pretty good hand-eye coordination.” “Did you wreck him, Swan?”

Her eyes were going to get stuck that way if she kept rolling them, but Emma was smiling again and they kept bouncing through moods in this conversation. It felt like playing the game. She’d clearly lost her mind.

“You were right before, you know, that’s totally lame,” Emma said. “But, yeah. Every single time. And even now. Between David and Mary Margaret I was fairly convinced I was the greatest player to ever walk the Earth, but they were just both painfully bad at Halo.”

“And that sparked the interest as a career?” Emma shook her head and that was what she’d been dreading. There wasn’t any way to explain a year in jail and no high school degree and what talent did she have except the innate ability to kill her virtual enemies? Killian seemed to pick up on her concern, hand falling back on her arm and she shuddered at the touch.

When she’d gotten out of jail, she didn’t know where to go – didn’t have much more than a blanket with her name on it and the memories of everything blowing up in her face and Emma was barely making ends meet in Providence when David showed up at her apartment and told her enough was enough.

He found her. Again. And Emma had gone with him. Again.

So he took her to that sleepy little college town and got her a job at the coffee shop on campus and Emma kept playing, nights on the couch with David and Mary Margaret and, eventually, she came up with a plan.

She started making money. She almost forgot about him and a time when she wasn’t certain and confident and ready and the League just seemed like the next logical step.

Only that step had landed her in front of Killian Jones and his recorder and blue eyes and Emma needed a plausible story. “I’ve always wanted to kind of control my own life, I guess,” Emma started, mumbling over the words while she tried to keep her lip in between her teeth. “And I’ve been lucky that my brother and M’s have been super supportive of that. So they helped and played against me so I could get better and there were competitions all over the country that had big prize pools, bigger every year as games got more and more popular and less and less weird and, well, you know the rest. I’m camping out in their living room while I try to find my own place and win this whole, stupid League.” Killian hummed, hitting another button on the recorder and starting at her. Still. He kept doing that. She wished he wouldn’t. “Was that ok?” Emma asked. “On the record?” “Of course, Swan. It’s a good start.” “A start?” “Ah, well, that’s my angle I guess,” he explained. “We’d background everyone on the team, maybe highlight how shitty this whole seeding thing was and talk a little bit about what comes next. Oh and maybe the thing in Philadelphia.” “You know about that too?” He quirked an eyebrow at her, smirk settling onto his face with practiced ease and they definitely had to play soon. It felt like they’d been standing in that corner for several lifetimes. “You’re very surprised by reading comprehension, love,” Killian laughed.

“Just impressed by your dedication to research.” “Maybe not such a bad journalist, after all. I almost understand the game.”

“Color me impressed,” Emma smiled, eyes wide and that smirk was stupid. She wanted to kiss it off. She wanted to absolutely wreck Vivi’s Adventure in the first round. “You know, maybe, we could try and build on that knowledge today? If you’ve got...questions or something.” “Are you offering to explain the video game to me, Swan? Henry’s been trying to do that for two weeks already.” “And how that’s going for you?” “Eh, he’s very frustrated. Far more preoccupied with getting that credit than anything I could offer him today.” “Ah, well, there’s no ice cream involved.” Killian smiled and Emma’s heart dropped into her stomach or maybe into her feet or possibly exploded out of her chest. “Always a disappointment, of course,” he muttered, stuffing his recorder back into his pocket and leaning towards her again.

He didn’t touch her arm.

He did, however, move his left hand and Emma’s eyes caught on a flash of color and a name and the question hung in the minimal amount of air between them as soon as she closed her mouth. “Who’s Milah?” she asked. “On the tattoo.” And just like that, it was over. The whole scene changed and Emma’d been absolutely wrecked by an assailant she didn’t see and wasn’t prepared for, thrown back to the start of some metaphorical level without a single weapon to her name.

The corner suddenly felt very small and Killian couldn't seem to back up quick enough, eyes dark and lips pressed together tightly and he crossed his arms over his chest. “Someone from a long time ago,” he bit out, venom in every single letter. “On the record.”

Emma nodded, quick jerks of her neck that sent a shockwave of pain and frustration down her spine. That’s what she got for asking questions.

“Hey, uh, guys,” Elsa said, appearing in the corner with a nervous look on her face. “We’ve got to go play the game. Ruby’s half a second away from shutting down the whole tournament to try and find you, Em.” “Of course she is,” Emma mumbled. She tried to plaster a smile on her face, certain it hadn’t worked as soon as she looked at Elsa. “Ok, we’re coming.”

She turned back to Killian – shoulders tight with the tension he was holding and his thumb pressed into his left forearm. “You, uh, want to watch a game in action?” Emma asked and he hummed softly, gaze still heavy on her face.

“Yeah, Swan,” he said. “Let’s go.”

#cs ff #cs #captain swan #captain swan ff #captain swan fic #video game fic #if i ever write a fic where david and mary margaret aren't emma's biggest fans #i've probably been kidnapped #just fyi

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cssns · 7 years ago

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Drum roll please!!! Welcome @ilovemesomekillianjones to the CSSNS!!!

Hello everyone! We now turn the spotlight on @ilovemesomekillianjones for our CSSNS author spotlight! Everyone go say hi!

How long have you been in the CS/OUAT fandom?

I have been a member of the CS Fandom for almost three years.

When did you start shipping Captain Swan?

I started watching season one of OUAT while season four was airing, and I started to ship Captain Swan from the moment I watched the sparks fly in Tallahassee (2x06)

What drew you to this event?

I love Captain Swan and I love vampires, need I say more?

What inspired your topic?

Captain Swan inspires all of my writing. This particular story is also inspired by my love of HBO's True Blood (Eric x Sookie should've been end game), and Twilight, (don't judge :D), although the story line won't follow any story line from those universes.

If you would like to share a snippet/sneak peek/summary of your fic or artwork, please use the space below.

One year after the disappearance of the love of her life, Emma Swan is struggling. She’s losing hope, consciousness, and she might be losing her mind. After receiving life altering news, Emma will be faced with more than one difficult decision. Her choices seem bleak, until a new choice is offered, one she couldn’t have fathomed even in the crazy hallucinations she’d been having. Is she strong enough to accept a future that’s different than the one that was ripped from her just one short year ago?

Ohhhh Allison! I can’t wait for this!!!!! Allison is a wonderful writer and I’m so thrilled that she’s participating in the CSSNS!!! You can find her other works here. So everyone go say hello and welcome her to the CSSNS!!! Her fic drops on Aug. 7.

#cssns #@ilovemesomekillianjones #GTKM interviews

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dccomicsnews · 7 years ago

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DC Comics News has compiled a list of DC Comics titles and collectibles shipping to comic shops for April 11, 2018.

Check back every Friday with the DC Comics News Pull Box to see all the cool new DC Comics titles and collectibles that will be available at your favorite local comic shop! So, what titles or collectibles will you be picking up this Wednesday? You can sound off in the comments section below! Click on Comic shop Locator to find the comic shop nearest to you!

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ACTION COMICS 80 YEARS OF SUPERMAN HC $29.99

Jerry Seigel, Fred Guardineer, Mort Weisinger, Don Cameron, Jerry Coleman, Otto Binder, Edmond Hamilton, Len Wein, Cary Bates, Marv Wolfman, John Byrne, Roger Stern, Joe Kelly, Grant Morrison, Paul Levitz (A) Joe Shuster, Fred Guardineer, Mort Meskin, Ed Dobrotka, Wayne Boring, Stan Kaye, Al Plastino, Jim Mooney, Curt Swan, George Klein, Carmine Infantino, Dick Giordano, Joe Giella, Gil Kane, John Byrne, Kerry Gammill, Dennis Janke, Bob McLeod, Ben Oliver, Neal Adams (CA) Jim Lee, Scott Williams

This year marks the 80th anniversary of Superman’s debut in ACTION COMICS #1 – and DC is celebrating this date with the publication of the new hardcover ACTION COMICS #1000: 80 YEARS OF SUPERMAN! It’s an extraordinary party as we revisit stories from across the decades, featuring key character debuts, essays and more in a collection curated by Paul Levitz! Highlights of this collection include: A new cover by legendary artist and DC Publisher Jim Lee A never before unpublished twelve-page Golden Age Superman story believed to have been written by Jerry Siegel with art by the Joe Shuster Studio Text pieces including: an editor’s note by Paul Levitz, a tribute to ACTION COMICS by Laura Siegel Larson (daughter of Superman co-creator Jerry Siegel), an introduction by Jules Feiffer, plus essays by Tom DeHaven (“It’s Superman!”), David Hadju (“The Ten-Cent Plague”), Larry Tye (“Superman: The High-Flying History of America’s Most Enduring Hero”) and Gene Luen Yang (SUPERMAN, NEW SUPER-MAN and the National Book Award finalist “American Born Chinese”)! The new five-page story “The Game,” written by Paul Levitz with art by Neal Adams The Superman stories from this collection include: “The Coming of Superman,” from ACTION COMICS #1, written by Jerry Siegel with art by Joe Shuster “Revolution in San Monte,” from from ACTION COMICS #2, written by Jerry Siegel with art by Joe Shuster “The Terrible Toyman!” from ACTION COMICS #64, written by Don Cameron with art by Ed Dobrotka and George Roussos, featuring the debut of Toyman “The Super-Key to Fort Superman,” from ACTION COMICS #241, written by Jerry Coleman with art by Wayne Boring and Stan Kaye, featuring the first appearance of the Fortress of Solitude “The Super-Duel in Space,” from ACTION COMICS #242, written by Otto Binder with art by Al Plastino, featuring the debut of Brainiac “The Supergirl from Krypton!” from ACTION COMICS #252, written by Otto Binder with art by Al Plastino, featuring the debut of Supergirl “The World’s Greatest Heroine!” from ACTION COMICS #262, written by Jerry Siegel with art by Jim Mooney “The Superman Super-Spectacular!” from ACTION COMICS #309, written by Edmond Hamilton with art by Curt Swan and George Klein, featuring an appearance by President John F. Kennedy “Superman Takes a Wife,” from ACTION COMICS #484, written by Cary Bates with art by Curt Swan and Joe Giella “If Superman Didn’t Exist…” from ACTION COMICS #554, written by Marv Wolfman with art by Gil Kane “Squatter,” from ACTION COMICS #584, written by John Byrne with art by Byrne and Dick Giordano “Ma Kent’s Photo Album,” from ACTION COMICS #655, written by Roger Stern with art by Kerry Gammill and Dennis Janke “Secrets in the Night,” from ACTION COMICS #662, written by Roger Stern with art by Bob McLeod “A Hero’s Journey,” from ACTION COMICS #800, written by Joe Kelly with art by Pasqual Ferry, Duncan Rouleau, Lee Bermejo and others “The Boy Who Stole Superman’s Cape,” from ACTION COMICS #0, written by Grant Morrison with art by Ben Oliver Other key ACTION COMICS stories in this title include: “The Mystery of the Freight Train Robberies,” from ACTION COMICS #1, written by Fred Guardineer with art by Guardineer, featuring the debut of Zatara “The Origin of the Vigilante,” from ACTION COMICS #42, written by Mort Weisinger with art by Mort Meskin, featuring the debut of the Vigilante “The Assassin-Express Contract!” from ACTION COMICS #419, written by Len Wein with art by Carmine Infantino and Dick Giordano, featuring the debut of the Human Target ACTION COMICS #1000: 80 YEARS OF SUPERMAN HC (DEC170241) is a 384-page title. It has a new Final Order Cutoff of February 5 and an on-sale date of April 11. Please note that the poster mentioned in the original solicitation will no longer be included in this title. The poster, which features all one thousand ACTION COMICS covers, will be offered as a separate item with ordering details to come soon.

SUPERMAN EXILE AND OTHER STORIES OMNIBUS HC $125.00

Jerry Ordway, Roger Stern, George Perez, Dan Jurgens, Tom Peyer (A) Jerry Ordway, Mike Mignola, P. Craig Russell, George Perez, Curt Swan, Brett Breeding, John Beatty, Dan Jurgens, John Statema, Art Thibert, Paris Cullins, Ty Templeton, Tim Gula, Keith Giffen, Andy Kubert, Klaus Janson (A/CA) Kerry Gammill, Dennis Janke

The late 1980s stories that set the stage for the epic “Death of Superman” are collected in a new hardcover Omnibus edition for the first time. These tales include appearances by Lex Luthor, Lois Lane, Mongul, Mr. Mxyzptlk and more, plus the debut of the Eradicator, a key player in the post “Death of Superman” era. Collects THE ADVENTURES OF SUPERMAN #445-460, SUPERMAN #23-37, ACTION COMICS #643-646 and ACTION COMICS ANNUAL #2.

HAWKMAN BY GEOFF JOHNS TP BOOK 02 $29.99

Geoff Johns (A) Rags Morales, Jose Luis Garcia Lopez, Scot Eaton, Don Kramer, Michael Bair, Keith Champagne, John Dell, Leonard Kirk, Ray Kryssing, Rodney Ramos (CA) John Watson

Shayera Thal, the Thanagarian Hawkwoman, returns to the world of Hawkman! But her motives for seeking out Carter and Kendra aren’t exactly filled with good intentions… Hawkgirl isn’t exactly happy to see her…or to learn about the customary Thanagarian greeting! Hawkwoman has finally tracked down the final fate of her ex-partner and what it means to the world of the Animal Avatars. But an unexpected tagalong will send Shayera’s life in an entirely new direction! Guest-starring Animal Man, Black Adam and Headhunter. Collects HAWKMAN #15-25 and JSA #56-58.

Variant Covers

Note: Variant Prices To Be Determined By Retailer

BATGIRL AND THE BIRDS OF PREY #21 VAR ED $3.99 DETECTIVE COMICS #978 VAR ED $2.99 FLASH #44 VAR ED $2.99 HAL JORDAN AND THE GREEN LANTERN CORPS #42 VAR ED $2.99 JUSTICE LEAGUE OF AMERICA #28 VAR ED $2.99 NEW SUPER MAN & THE JUSTICE LEAGUE OF CHINA #22 VAR ED $3.99 RED HOOD AND THE OUTLAWS #21 VAR ED $3.99 SCOOBY APOCALYPSE #24 VAR ED $3.99 SUICIDE SQUAD #39 VAR ED $2.99 SUPERGIRL #20 VAR ED $3.99 TITANS #22 VAR ED $3.99 TRINITY #21 VAR ED $3.99 WONDER WOMAN #44 VAR ED $2.99

GRAPHIC NOVEL

ACTION COMICS 80 YEARS OF SUPERMAN HC $29.99 DC UNIVERSE BY BRIAN K VAUGHAN TP $19.99 HARLEY QUINN RED WHITE & BLACK STATUE BY BABS TARR $80.00 HAWKMAN BY GEOFF JOHNS TP BOOK 02 $29.99 JUSTICE LEAGUE REBIRTH DLX COLL HC BOOK 02 $34.99 SUICIDE SQUAD TP VOL 05 KILL YOUR DARLINGS REBIRTH $14.99 SUPERMAN EXILE AND OTHER STORIES OMNIBUS HC $125.00 SUPERMAN TP VOL 05 HOPES AND FEARS REBIRTH $16.99 WONDER WOMAN BY GEORGE PEREZ TP VOL 03 $29.99

MAGAZINES

ALTER EGO #152 $9.95

Alter Ego presents Larry Ivie, maybe the most important Silver Age comic book artist/writer you never heard of! He conceived (and named!) the Justice League of America, he helped develop the T.H.U.N.D.E.R. Agents, he brought EC art greats to the world of Edgar Rice Burroughs. and he created Monsters and Heroes, one of the first magazines ever to bridge the gap between fan and pro! Artist/friend Sandy Plunkett chronicles this unsung star’s career, with art by Wood, Frazetta, Crandall, Krenkel, Doolin, and others, plus rarely-seen and never-seen Ivie art and story pages spotlighting Justice League, Hawkman, The Atom, Sandman, and Superman!

BACK ISSUE #61 LONGBOX ED $8.95

New Printing & Size! Reprints the original sold-out issue at standard magazine size, so you can fill the hole in your Back Issue collection! It looks at “Tabloids and Treasuries,” spotlighting the Bronze Age’s biggest comic books, including every all-new tabloid from the 1970s, and a checklist of reprint treasury editions. Superman vs. the Amazing Spider-Man, The Bible, Captain America’s Bicentennial Battles, The Wizard of Oz, even the Paul Dini/Alex Ross World’s Greatest Super-Heroeseditions – they’re all here! With commentary from and/or art by Neal Adams, Jose Luis Garcia-Lopez, Mike Grell, Jack Kirby, Joe Kubert, Sheldon Mayer, John Romita, Sr., Alex Toth, and more. Featuring a reimagining of Grell’s Superboy and the Legion of Super-Heroes Limited Collectors’ Edition wraparound cover by Alex Ross!

MERCHANDISE/COLLECTIBLES

GUND DC BATMAN 7IN PLUSH BACKPACK CLIP $10.00 GUND DC FUZZY BEAR BATMAN 14IN PLUSH $20.00 GUND DC FUZZY BEAR SUPERGIRL 14IN PLUSH $20.00 GUND DC FUZZY BEAR SUPERMAN 14IN PLUSH $20.00 GUND DC FUZZY BEAR WONDER WOMAN 14IN PLUSH $20.00 GUND DC SUPERGIRL 7IN PLUSH BACKPACK CLIP $10.00 GUND DC SUPERMAN 7IN PLUSH BACKPACK CLIP $10.00 GUND DC WONDER WOMAN 7IN PLUSH BACKPACK CLIP $10.00

ACTION FIGURES/STATUES

DARK KNIGHT BANE MAF EX $99.99 DC BATMAN UNIVERSE BUST COLL #4 TWO-FACE $24.95 DC SUPERHERO BEST OF FIG COLL MAG #52 BEAST BOY $17.95 DC SUPERHERO BEST OF FIG COLL MAG #53 HUNTRESS $17.95 DC SUPERHERO BEST OF FIG COLL MAG #54 GOLDEN AGE FLASH $17.95 FFG DC COMICS COLL WONDER WOMAN 1/6 PVC FIG $99.99

CLOTHING

WONDER WOMAN CLASSIC T/S LG $19.95 WONDER WOMAN CLASSIC T/S MED $19.95 WONDER WOMAN CLASSIC T/S SM $19.95 WONDER WOMAN CLASSIC T/S XL $19.95 WONDER WOMAN CLASSIC T/S XXL $22.95

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DC Comics Pull Box For 4-4-18 (New Comics and Merchandise) DC Comics News has compiled a list of DC Comics titles and collectibles shipping to comic shops for April 11, 2018.

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cat-sophia · 7 years ago

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Happy 27th Captain Swan Day!

Hello My Dear Friends!

This Sunday lets talk about @welllpthisishappening - talented writer, one of this amazing, brilliant people that helped me survive this last few months. Her fics are not only perfect stories about Emma and Killian but also she create this whole verse full of characters that we fall in love to - creates this big, happy families for Emma and Killian.

Tripping Over the Blue Line (1st chapter on Tumblr) she wrote this year for @captainswanbigbang - is about hockey (you really not need to know anything about this sport to enjoy it - i know almost nothing about it) and love and family. It’s hard not to love everything about it - if by any chance you did not read it - try - i promise it’s perfect. (and we have sequel promised)

Out of the Frying Pan (Tumblr) - Emma, Killian and Food Network all-star cooking competition - wonderful story with food (will make you hungry) and family (including Swan Jones Family) and you should also read two short additions to this verse - It’s a Funny Old Game (Tumblr) - where Killian plays football and Halloween special The Anti-Pumpkin Brigade (Tumblr).

Read also You Play Ball Like a Girl (Tumblr) - her other amazing multichapter Emma, Killian and the New York City journalism world.

And of course her wonderful short stories like Sliding Down the Hill (Tumblr) “A not-quite a Little League World Series AU” (lots, lots of Swan Jones Family feels) and But Consider This…Aliens (Tumblr) - funny and cute not quite alien (new neighbor) story and This World You Must’ve Crossed (Tumblr) about Emma and her new roommate who is not quite ghost (another perfect, perfect story - trust me).

Laura, thank you for all the feels - even the angst - thank you for all the time i spend reading your wonderful stories instead of worrying about stuff, thank you that you filled my mind with love and happiness and perfect families.

Thank you!

edit: @welllpthisishappening fics i read after i made this post:

All Tripping Over the Blue Line one shots!

The PyeongChang Triple - continuation of Tripping Over the Blue Line - lots of happy perfect family and team moments - perfection! (also read all one shots she wrote for this stories - love, love them all!)

To Make the Season Bright - AU - “It's just one weekend. At Christmas. In New York. With everyone there. With Killian there. It's fine. Emma doesn't mind – he's always there and she wants him to be there and it'll be good. Great, even. Festive. She's looking forward to it.She just hopes she doesn't do something stupid. Like shout feelings in his face. That probably wouldn't be very festive.”

It’s the Thought That Counts - Canon - “Ordering gifts on the internet makes sense. It's just a few clicks and online sales and the presents will be there in plenty of time for Christmas to be perfect.Emma and Killian are positive.Except then the presents don't show up and it's Christmas Eve and plan B isn't so much a plan as it is just a bit of pre-holiday desperation and the entire town knows what they're up to.“

In Case of Emergency, Call... - AU "I'm your emergency contact and best friend and you were in a major accident and I'm trying to act like what happened is no big deal but you nearly died and how are you the one distracting me from it all?"

To Grandmother's House We Go and Whistled for Icing - Canon, future CS

Playing Man Down - AU Something like She's The Man. It's about lacrosse. Not soccer.

Contact Light - secret dating AU

A Fair, Even-Handed, Noble Adjustment of Things - AU “Emma just wants to do something good. Give back. Maybe get a few bonus points. Metaphorically speaking. Not the last one. That defeats the purpose of all of this. But she can’t really think straight because he keeps humming and using nicknames and stealing all the flour. And she’d give up all the bonus points she’s, maybe, accumulated by, possibly, doing good if she could just remember what his name is. This is not going the way she planned. At all.”

Heart to Heart and Hand in Hand - AU - perfect proposal

Sharp Corners and Crisp Folds - AU CSJJ’18 “It’s going to take hours. Days. The rest of her goddamn life. Probably not. That last one is a bit dramatic. But, honestly, it’s going to take a ton of time to refold all those shirts and this guy just keeps wandering around the store with, seemingly, no purpose and Emma has no customer service skills at all. Mary Margaret would know what to do. Mary Margaret is not there. It’s just Emma and the t-shirt destroyer. And his goddamn, stupid leather jacket.”

With a Little Bit of Luck - helping their best friends plan an elopement AU

Holding the Edge - Killian Jones does not want the questions. He doesn’t want the interviews or the spotlight or the sky-high expectations. Killian Jones is one heck of a comeback story. With his eyes on gold. And maybe slightly gold'ish hair and green eyes and, yeah, maybe he’s got some questions of his own.

Almost Believing, This One’s Not Pretend - They don’t grow up skating together. They don’t even want to start skating together. But then life happens and they kind of need each other so they keep skating and, sometimes, winning and, always, ignoring the questions. Because how could two people have so much chemistry on the ice when they’re just partners?

A Touch of (March) Madness - AU Emma can’t quite remember how it started or why it happened, just that it did and she wants to win. Desperately. To prove something. Probably.Or just to beat Killian. Either or. It doesn’t matter.She’s picked her teams and her upsets and she’s got a string of trash talk ready for any potential on-court situation. They’re not playing the game, but they’re playing a game and this one might change everything.

Gone the Way of the Dinosaurs - AU Emma doesn’t entirely understand the town of Storybrooke.It is, apparently, the kind of place with story time at the library and spring festivals on Friday night and unfairly attractive people with blue eyes who know all the words to the dinosaur song her kid is also inexplicably singing.She doesn’t understand the town of Storybrooke yet, but maybe Emma is willing to do a little research.

Caught in Your Light - AU Forever. It’s been forever. Or, possibly, longer.It might honestly be longer. Killian can’t remember a moment when he wasn’t hopelessly, head over heels in love with Emma. And it’s kind of becoming a problem. Because it’s been forever and they’ve always been friends, but now things are changing and traditions are ending and there’s just one more weekend.This is it. So it’s time to do something about it. In Boston. With all their friends watching. It’ll be fine.

When You Want to Escape, Say the Word - Her Royal Highness Princess Emma of Misthaven was exhausted. And bored. And frustrated. And mostly bored.She’d spent her life watching her parents save the kingdom, inspire others and, just generally, become the basis for every love story she’d ever believed. But, now, on her own trip to Arendelle, Emma hadn’t done much of anything.So, she’d left. She was going to see the city and do what she wanted. At least for a day. She just didn’t expect to run into an obstacle as soon as she left the castle – literally.

Beggars and Blighters and Ne'er Do-Well Cads - Emma Swan is just trying to make sure her kid’s birthday goes off without a hitch, but the world doesn’t appear to care. At all.Because she’s got no idea where the cupcakes are, and Mary Margaret is apparently threatening parents, and there’s some kind of pirate standing in front of her with a goddamn hook and a smile that should be illegal.The world is a giant joke. Happy birthday, Henry.

A Royal Proclamation - canon - how Emma and Killian would have done it, like telling Snow and David and all the town about the pregnancy?

#happy captain swan day #captain swan #cs fic rec #cs ff #cs fic #cs crew #cs family #cs fandom #cs fanfics #long post

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killiancygnus · 7 years ago

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Serendipitous Melody 14/?

Summary: Everyone has dreams. You might dream of becoming an astronaut or teacher, or you might want to become a doctor and save as many lives you can. Emma Swan’s childhood dream was being a singer. But with life getting in the way and never finding the courage to overcome her fears, she never had a chance to follow it. That is until a little push from her friends lead her to cash on an opportunity; and, who knows, she might even get more than what she’d wished for.

Rated: T

Word count: ~4.4k

A/N: Luckily I’ve been in a nice writing mood lately so, yeah, mission accomplished a full week earlier than planned *woohoo*. Anyway, this might easily be my new favourite chapter, I had so much fun writing it and I hope you’ll like it too. If you want to scream at me after reading this, do it I love seeing (well reading) your reactions!

Thanks to the wonderful and lovely @mahstatins for her crazy betaing skills and, as always, to all the CS Writers’ Hub ladies for all the sprints and brainstorming sessions.

Tagging some friends: @villains-happy-ending, @stardusted-nymph, @allisonchameron, @kmomof4, @hencethebravery, @katie-dub, @captainwiley, @irishswanff, @thejollypirate, @dassala, @imhookedonaswan, @ofshipsandswans, @legendofthephoenixcs , @the-reason-to-sail-home and @londonsbridge

If you want to be tagged too let me know :)

(Emma and Killian’s song is, of course, the ultimate Captain Swan song aka Superheroes by The Script).

Links: Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4 - Chapter 5 - Chapter 6 - Chapter 7 - Chapter 8 - Chapter 9- Chapter 10 - Chapter 11 - Chapter 12 - Chapter 13 / AO3

Emma walked towards the stage; her posture stiff, ready for a fight, eyes shining with determination. She was going to talk to him, Mary Margaret had convinced her to.

According to her friend, Killian was in love with her as much as she was with him. And no matter how many times Emma tried to explain to her that firstly, even though yes she could admit she had feelings for him, she wasn’t sure she could call it love, and secondly, she couldn’t possibly love someone she had known for less than a couple of months, Mary Margaret wouldn’t listen. The problem was that whereas her friend believed in love at first sight, true love and all that fairytale-y shit, Emma didn’t. Not at all. She wasn’t going to confess her feelings for him, whatever they were, or some other shit just because her friend wanted her to. No, Emma wanted answers. She thought she knew that Killian and Tink were just friends, but were they actually? After that article, the drama that exploded among the fans and all the other articles that started to pop up in the following twenty-four hours, she wasn’t sure anymore. And yes maybe she was just jealous, but after all, who wouldn’t be?

“Emma!” Killian exclaimed, walking up to her as she emerged from backstage, “Can we… Can we talk for a moment?”

Emma nodded and crossed her arms over her chest. “Go on then. Let’s talk.”

“I guess I should take that as proof you saw that article right?”

“Yes. And the others that came after that one. Twitter too. Everybody seemed to have an opinion on it except you or Tink,” she said flatly.

“Oh,” he said, his eyes widening in shock, “Well, everything they wrote is bullshit, better not to give them any ammunitions. I wanted you to hear that from myself. You know, talk face to face.”

“Really?” she asked, raising her eyebrows, “And why would you have to do that? You can do whatever you want, it’s not like we are together or anything.”

“Yes, really,” he retorted, “Why, are you jealous?”

“No,” Emma said quickly, far too quickly to be convincing. Blushing at the way Killian skeptically arched his left brow, she continued as if nothing happened, “You didn’t answer my question.”

Killian passed his hand through his hair and sighed, “Perhaps it’s because I’d like us to be more than friends, some day.”

“Killian…” Emma started, hoping he wouldn’t read the shock and hope all over her face, “This is not -”

“What? Appropriate? The right time?” He interrupted her in an angry whisper after he took a quick look around to check they were alone. His eyes then focused on hers, the strength of his gaze almost too much for her to hold, “I bloody well know that! But I couldn’t keep this inside for much longer, not when it’s making things worse between us than they already are. I understand if you don’t want to take things any further, but all you have to do is tell me and promise you won’t run away from me anyway.”

“I -” she hesitated, too stunned to process a full sentence, “I’m sorry. I’ve never...”

His face fell, but he still tried to give her a reassuring smile. “There’s no need for you to say anything else. Be ready for rehearsals in fifteen.”

And with that he walked away, leaving a speechless Emma behind.

Nice, Emma. Well done, she thought, wandering around the labyrinth of corridors backstage.

Deep down she had known how much he actually cared for her, but hearing it directly from his lips was another thing altogether. Her heart had started beating so fast that for an instant she feared it would have escaped her chest and her mind went completely blank. She’d only dared to hope he would feel the same for her, but he did, and thanks to that wonderful display of those communication skills of hers, now he thought she didn’t.

Chocolate. She needed some chocolate. Ice-cream would have been ideal to get some sugar courage before facing him again but all she had at hand was a little money and a vending machine. But of course, when she was only a couple of moments away from her chocolatey pick me up, the thing got stuck between the support and the plexiglass.

“Oh, come on,” she groaned, hitting the machine to make her Apollo bar fall down.

“Bad day?” A voice asked behind her.

Emma shot a quick look behind her back and then focused her attention back on her still stuck snack.

“You could say that,” Emma said with gritted teeth as with a last punch she managed to get her packaged chocolate fix, and added, turning around to face Tink, “Pretty used to bad days by now.”

Tink smiled apologetically, “I’m sorry.”

“You shouldn’t be. This isn’t your fault.”

Tink gave her a tight, unconvinced smile before changing the subject. “Shouldn’t you be rehearsing your duet with Killian now?”

Emma sighed, “I still have a few minutes.”

“Is everything alright?”

“I...” Emma hesitated, tilting her chin down. Truth was she really didn’t know what to say. Well, yes things were not okay but it still was partially Tink’s fault for not telling anyone but her friends about her ‘secret boyfriend’.

“Is it Killian? What did he do?” Tink asked, worried by her reaction.

“No, no. It’s me,” she finally admitted, hoping she would stop asking questions, “I fucked up.”

“I doubt you did. That man loves you too much. I don’t know what happened, but I’m sure he has already forgiven you.”

“I - What?!” Emma stuttered. She just couldn’t believe what she had just heard.

This must be a joke. He can’t already be in love with me, we only met a few weeks ago, Emma thought. Tink, just like Mary Margaret, must be mistaken. He’d practically just admitted he liked her yes, but love? No way.

Tink looked incredulously at her, as if she thought this wasn’t news to Emma, “I’ve known Killian for years,” she insisted. “And last time I saw him like this it was with Milah. He loves you, Emma, and I think you love him too.”

Okay, no, this was definitely too much. “Wait. Why are you telling me this? I mean aren’t you two,” Emma gestured vaguely, “a thing?”

“Oh, I’m gonna kill him!” She exclaimed, “This is about the pictures, isn’t it? Didn’t he tell you anything? I thought he would have.”

“Well, he said it was all bullshit but I was bit jealous, I guess, and…”

“And it’s hard to believe such a thing when everyone and everything is screaming at you otherwise,” Tink completed the sentence for her and added, reaching for her arm to give her some reassurance, “Trust me I know how you feel. I saw my boyfriend’s reaction too many times during our first months together to not understand. It’s never easy for him, but it’s getting better. He wasn’t even mad yesterday. But probably that’s because he knows that Killian is like a brother to me.”

“Why haven’t you two told the world you are together?”

After letting out a sigh, Tink explained, “Jefferson is not a model, nor an actor, nor a musician. He is a doctor and he got dragged into this crazy world where privacy basically has no meaning thanks to me. Like everyone who isn’t used to it, seeing his personal life in magazines, being followed around, photographed while getting your coffee is disquieting. Also, he has a daughter, Grace. When we started seeing each other we didn’t even have to think twice about keeping our relationship off the spotlight for her sake and protection. She’s only 9 now, and she has just started seeing me as a mother figure a few months ago. Someday I’ll tell everyone about us, but not for a little while. I - we - want Grace to live away from this world as much as possible.”

God, she had been so stupid. She couldn’t believe she had jumped to conclusions so quickly after knowing how ruthless and a sucker for drama and scoop the media is.

“I’m sorry,” Emma muttered as she felt the tips of her ears burning hot in shame, “You know, for assuming what they wrote was true.”

“Don’t be. They can make everyone doubt whether what they say is true or not,” Tink gave her a bright smile, “Now go! I think your time is up.”

Smiling back at her, Emma started jogging on the way to the stage, but she suddenly stopped. “Tink wait,” she called after her turning around again, “Is there anyone else suspecting there’s, you know... Something between me and Killian?”

“It’s just me, Belle, Ariel and Robin,” she said counting them on her fingers. “But, don’t worry, we like you, Emma, as we obviously like Killian. We’ve got your back,” she added with a wink.

Emma managed to get on stage just on time, even if she was a bit out of breath from running there.

“Here she is!” Killian exclaimed as she got closer to him, “Are you ready to start, Swan?”

He didn’t even wait for a reply, that he put some distance between them, walking away to fix some cables of the microphones that obviously were just perfect as they were.

“Killian wait!” Emma said, running after him. He slowly looked up at her, as if he feared to meet directly her eyes, and only then she started, “About earlier…”

“No, Swan,” he interrupted her right away, “As I said before you don’t have to explain. I’ve got the message.”

“Even if you got it wrong?”

Killian just stared at her, eyes fixed on hers as his brows knitted together in confusion. He clearly wasn’t expecting her to say that, so, taking advantage of his silence, she started to explain, “You took me by surprise and I didn’t know what to tell you earlier.”

“And now you do?” He asked hopefully, taking a step closer, his hand reaching for a lock of gold waves to secure it behind her ear. He was so close she could feel his breath tingling on her lips. The urge to say ‘fuck it’ to discretion and drag his lips to hers by tugging his shirt was almost too much, the memory of the kiss they shared that night on his couch making things even worse. She wanted so badly to give in, show him that her feelings for him were far beyond platonic. But she fucking couldn’t.

“Yes,” she nodded, taking a deep breath before trying to put into words what she knew she couldn’t really express, “I -”

“Are you two quite done?” the stage manager shouted, making them jump apart, “We are on a tight schedule and no one here wants to go home late this evening.”

“Yes. Sorry” Killian said quickly, securing a mic on his belt and taking another for Emma, “We’ll get started right away.”

She wondered if she should wait to finish what she wanted to say, but he had already thought she didn’t return his feelings once, she didn’t want it to happen again just because they were interrupted. She wanted to fix things between them for once. So, as he lifted her up on the piano, she whispered in his ear, “Killian?”

“Mhm?”

As her thighs gently hit the piano she whispered again, “I really don’t want to stay apart from you again.”

At that Killian tilted his head back, looking at her as if to check she wasn’t joking. His hands were still on her hips, and she swore they stayed like that for hours. But then the spell broke when they heard the drummer giving the orchestra the tempo. Killian reluctantly had to let her and go take a seat on the stool to start playing.

That time he was the one to miss his cue.

Being on a live show was probably the most stressful thing Killian had ever done. Forget the concerts, red carpets, awards and even the interviews with labels he had to do when he first started. Everyone working on Enchanted was on edge, from the producers to the crew and makeup artists. You could just feel the tension in the air. Such an environment certainly didn’t help any of the singers’ nerves, he and the other judges included. Luckily, for this special second part of the semifinals, each contestant got to invite a few friends or family members to cheer for them and with whom they could spend the time before their performance. Killian, Belle and the other judges weren’t so lucky though, so, to escape the madness, they all basically locked themselves in their changing rooms.

It was only when the hand of the clock hit the six, indicating there was still half an hour left to the show, that he got up and left his changing room, headed to the waiting rooms backstage.

First, he found Elsa’s room. She was sitting on the couch already wearing the beautiful light blue dress crafted for her performance and makeup done, but the high heels she had to wear were on the floor next to the other end of the couch, as if the distance would make them hurt her feet any less later. Next to her, a bubbly redhead he recognised as Anna, one of Ariel’s former team members, was chatting away with whom he assumed was her fiancè. If he remembered right, Anna left the show a few weeks ago, when she duetted with the now semifinalist Merida.

After exchanging a few words with them, he moved on to the other end of the corridor, where he found Emma’s room. Like Elsa, she was already ready for the show, not that this time Emma had to spend ages in Costumes and Makeup since her outfit was more close to her style than usual, with boots, skinny jeans and a red shirt. She didn’t look as tense as Elsa was. On the contrary, she seemed pretty calm, laughing at something David had just said along with a petite brunette next to him he assumed was the famous Mary Margaret.

“Oh my God,” the woman sprawled on the couch shrieked, moving her sunglasses from her nose to the top of her head as she sat up.

At the noise Emma turned around to face the door and, when her eyes landed on him, she gave him a bright smile. “Killian,” she muttered, running up to him to throw herself into his arms.

“Hey Swan,” he chuckled in surprise, his nose nuzzling her soft gold locks and breathing in their sweet fruity scent, “Everything alright?”

“Yes, sorry. I’m just excited,” she said, reluctantly pulling away to face her friends. Ruby was still frozen sitting on the couch, whereas Mary Margaret was giving her a strange knowing look that made Emma blush. David instead could have easily been flashing death rays from his eyes at Killian if he were a superhero.

“Killian, this is Ruby,” Emma started, gesturing at her gobsmacked friend, “And this is Mary Margaret, the reason you didn’t die eating those muffin I brought for breakfast a few days ago, and David’s fianceè. Do you remember him right?”

“Of course I do, how could I forget?” Killian winked, making both Emma and Mary Margaret giggle.

“I could say the same thing,” David muttered unamusedly, earning himself a soft smack on the arm from his future wife.

“So Ruby,” Killian started, changing subject to make things less awkward, “Emma tells me you are a fan?”

Seeing Ruby pale at him talking with her, made a soft smile appear on his lips. He missed interacting with fans, especially those that like her turned all flustered all of a sudden at his mere presence. It was flattering, yes, which never hurt, overwhelming too, but it also gave meaning to what he did.

“Yeah...I love you,” Ruby blurted out blushing, “I mean, I love your music.”

Killian smiled, “Thank you, love. That means a lot to me.”

Emma opened her mouth to say something when a voice, coming strong and loud from outside interrupted her, “Ten minutes to go! Everyone get ready!”

“I think that’s my queue. Sorry, love, I’ll see you later,” he announced with a sigh, kissing Emma briefly on the cheek and then turning as if nothing happened to face her friends, “It was a pleasure meeting you.”

“Killian wait!” Mary Margaret stopped him, “You should have dinner with us next week. I mean, if Emma gets to the final.”

“Of course, it’d be a pleasure,” he winked, watching with amusement at Emma’s dumbfounded and flushed face before exiting the room and heading to the door from which he’d have done his entrance.

Soon, cameras and mics were switched on and it was only when he sat on his chair, after Belle announced his name and he jogged through excited fans, that he truly relaxed.

Surprisingly, things went pretty smoothly and he soon found himself singing with Elsa. His was the last team of the night, meaning the first three finalists had already been announced. First was Merida, a Scottish woman with long ginger curls and an enchanting singing voice, for Ariel’s team; second Victor, a tall and slightly vampiresque surgeon with his bleached hair and a surprisingly deep and soothing voice, a member of Tink’s team; and third, for Robin’s team of course, Philip, a bit of a rascal like Killian and, as far as he knew, pretty loved among all the contestants by a large portion of the audience.

Although Elsa’s song was one of his favourites, he couldn’t wait to be over with it and sing with Emma. Luckily for him, it was only a few seconds later that, as the cheers of the audience for Elsa died down and Belle started presenting the last song of the night, stealing the cameras’ attention away from the centre stage, he saw Emma enter the arena already sitting on top of the piano as it was pushed towards him by two members of the crew. The lights then dimmed out, only leaving him under a single ray of white light as he started to play, Emma only a shadow in the dark. As soon as he started to sing, the little surprised shrieks from some of his fans in the audience died down, only to build up again a few moments later when, done with his verse, Emma started hers as she was illuminated by a second spotlight.

As they reached the refrain, Killian stopped playing and helped her down from the piano moments before their voices merged together for the refrain. If someone had asked him if a soft and clear voice like Emma’s would have sounded good with his before he met her, he would have been pretty doubtful. He would have been so wrong though because honestly, their harmonies mixed so well together that he was sure she had ruined him for any other future collaboration. But it wasn't just how their timbres sounded together that made their performance so exceptional, no. The emotion that they had been trying to find back again in the past few days was finally there and he swore they had never been more in sync.

She's got lions in her heart

A fire in her soul he's a got a beast

In his belly that's so hard to control

Cause they've taken too much hits, taking blow by blow

Now light a match, stand back, watch them explode.

The nature of song had a big impact on their performance too. It was so perfectly fitting that it could have had easily been written for them. They were both kindred spirits, him and her, their souls hurt and battered by the unfairness of life.

They hadn't thought of a specific choreography to put onstage, if not for a few things like Emma's entrance, but no one really noticed. It was like they were reading each other's minds, predicting their moves.

As the song came to an end, Killian walked back to the piano, sitting on its stool to play the ending arpeggio. What he didn't notice though was that Emma followed him and positioned herself on the side of the piano with a Cheshire cat-like smile on her lips. Then, to his surprise, as his fingers flew up on the keyboard, she hit softly with a finger the last note for him. On his amused frown, the stage went black again as the audience cheered for them.

After giving her a tight hug, Killian run down the stage’s stairs to sit back on his red chair. As he was met with a bunch of compliments from his fellow coaches, Elsa, who had just come back on stage, hugged Emma before walking up to Belle.

“Wow, good job Emma and Elsa!” Belle exclaimed, “We already knew they were talented, but Killian, you and your girls were something else tonight.”

“What can I say, lass, we love to make an impression,” Killian smirked.

“I’m sure you do,” Belle laughed before turning serious all of a sudden when a girl came in to give her an envelope, “Now the time to laugh it up is over, though. As always, in this envelope there is the name of the one between you two that, thanks to the votes of the people watching us, will join the other finalists and get one step closer to fame and victory.”

A tense silence fell in the theatre as Belle opened the envelope. In that moment all Killian wanted - and he was sure both Emma and Elsa did too - was to get over it and head backstage, but time seemed to stop flowing.

“And the last finalist of Enchanted for Killian Jones’ team is,” Belle announced, making a long pause for effect, “Emma Swan!”

Everything that happened after Belle shouted her name was a bit of a blur. Elsa must have hugged her, she was sure of it. She thought she tried to comfort her friend but she wasn’t exactly certain of it. Backstage Ruby and Mary Margaret basically had jumped on her shouting in her ears how amazing she had been and then it was David’s turn to hold her so tight that for a moment Emma didn’t feel the floor under her feet. Then everyone she met on the way to Costumes gave her a pat on the shoulder or just told her something, but honestly, she didn’t remember what any of them said. Except for Victor, who after saying his congratulations asked her if she could introduce him to her friend, “the one with red lips and beautiful long hair”.

Typical Ruby, winning strangers’ hearts, she thought, chuckling to herself.

She had just gotten back in her clothes, when Emma heard Killian calling after her, as she was walking in an empty corridor on her way to the studio’s hall, “Swan!”

Coming to a halt, she turned around coming face to face with Killian.

“You did it,” he spoke softly, looking almost awed.

“No,” Emma said as she took a step forward, reducing the distance between them, “we did it.”

Killian smiled. “I knew it would have been you, love.”

“Ssh!” She shushed him putting a finger on her lips and then teased him, “Don’t let anyone hear you saying that or they might think there’s something more between us.”

“And is there?” He asked sheepishly, bringing his hand up to scratch the back of his neck in that adorable tick of his. God, he was so adorable she wanted to kiss him. “You’ve been interrupted yesterday, rather rudely may I add,” he continued, “and then you said… So I was wondering…”

“I would love to, if you -”

She didn’t have the time to finish the sentence that his lips smashed against hers. Taking advantage of her surprised gasp, he kissed her hard, running his tongue over her lips. One of his hands fell to her hip, the other moving to her hair as he carefully pushed her against the wall. It was soft, it was passionate, it was messy, and it lit a fire in her belly. He gently bit her lip and she let out a soft moan, tugging the belt loops of his jeans to pull his body closer and arching her back. The feeling of his soft lips on hers and of his hard body against hers sent a shiver down her spine. For a moment, she was thankful for the wall against her back because if he hadn’t pushed her against it, she was sure her legs would have given out by then.

When her hand moved up on the back of his neck, scratching his scalp while passing her fingers through his hair, he moaned her name against her lips, for then leaving a trail of kisses down her neck, making her feel lightheaded.

“Killian?” She whimpered, still trying to catch her breath.

When the only answer she got was a soft hum where he was kissing her behind her ear, she tugged at his hair to make him look at her, even though her body screamed at her to let him do that again. She knew he was a hell of a kisser, but this, this was borderline illegal. It was even better than the first kiss they shared what seemed like a lifetime ago. And that had been a fantastic kiss. If the man could kiss like that, she wondered what else he could do.

“I know it’s not exactly the moment,” she started, brushing away her last trail of thoughts. The task revealed to be impossible though, with the way his eyes were black from lust, his lips kiss swollen and his fingers drawing a pattern on her side where they had found their way up her shirt. ”And I know it sounds very fifth grade-ish but…” she continued, blushing at the craziness of the moment, “I like like you.”

“Good,” he chuckled, kissing away the blush on her cheeks before meeting her eyes again, “Because I like like you too, Emma.”

Smiling, Emma closed the distance between their lips and kissed him again. This time it was soft, gentle, but it still made her feel like she was flying.

They were so lost in each other, that they didn’t hear nor see the flash going off on the far end of the corridor from behind a corner.

#captain swan #cs ff au #cs ff #cs mafia #cs au #my fic #my writing #serendipitous melody #Fran against words #i am so so sorry for that cliffhanger #(no I'm not)

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nerdyhuntress · 7 years ago

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ouat? (for the send me a fandom thing lol)

Thanks for sending me an answer :D

SEND ME A FANDOM and I’ll tell you-

The first character I first fell in love with:

Oddly enough, Snow White. I loved how they changed up the Disney version of her being a damsel in distress to her being a badass with a bow and arrow and living in the forest.

The character I never expected to love as much as I do now:

KILLIAN JONES, PERIOD.

I hated him SO MUCH when he first came on the show. I thought he was just a womanizing bastard and wanted him dead but as season 3 came around, I began to like him a little bit. Episode 3x17 basically cemented my love for him because of his love for Emma and by the season 3 finale, I was totally a Hooker :D (he traded his ship for her!!! Who wouldn’t love him after that??)And his acts of heroism in season 4, 5, and 6 made me fully obsessed with him. Not to mention his redemption arc and his character development.

Today, I’m proud to call him one of my favorite fictional characters of all time

The character everyone else loves that I don’t:

Regina, I guess? The whole fandom seems so obsessed with her and I do NOT understand why.

She’s a rapist. She’s a mass murderer. A child abuser who gaslighted her own son. Nobody (aside from Rumplestiltskin) has committed crimes as heinous as this one the show. NOBODY.

And when has she ever apologized to one of her victims? When did she return all those hearts she stole? I hate the writers for whitewashing her and giving her so much spotlight when this is NOT HER SHOW.

All in all, she’s a bitch.

The character I love that everyone else hates:

Belle. I know everyone calls her stupid and obsessed with Rumple and berates her for giving him too many chances. I wholeheartedly agree. However, I still adore her so much.

She’s so sweet and compassionate. She’s the type of girl I’d love to have tea with and start a bookclub with. She’s just adorable and I know she makes bad decisions sometimes, but I can’t help loving her. I get frustrated sometimes with how forgiving she is, but she’s still a sweetheart in my book (pun intended haha)

The character I used to love but don’t any longer:

Snow White. I found it pretty messed up that by season 4, she cared more about taking care and comforting her step-mommy than her OWN DAUGHTER.

She barely had any memorable scenes with Emma or anyone else in her family by season 4. Instead, she chose to mother the woman who tried to kill her for half her life and tore her away from her daughter for 28 years. So fucked up, I can’t even put it in words. She just became so dull and pathetic.

The character I would totally smooch:

I’m Bi, so it’s a tie between Emma and Killian. The two most attractive characters in the series ;)

The character I’d want to be like:

EMMA SWAN. Like, she survived growing up alone and unloved for nearly her whole life.

Going from foster home to foster home, trapped in prison while pregnant, homeless living out of her car…until Henry found her. And that doesn’t even INCLUDE the crap the writers put her through inthe show.

Her strength amazes me so much. And her character development. Her son always believes in her (without ANY doubt) and so does Killian Jones. Anyone who thinks otherwise clearly cannot understand what’s in front of their face.

Just, that’s what everyone in this life needs. Someone who’ll believe in you in the rough times and in the good. Someone who’ll stick with you and remind you who you are and what you’re fighting for. Someone who will always loves you.

She taught me to put more trust in my loved ones and not be scared to be vulnerable and express my feelings. Above all, she taught me to keep hope and never stop fighting for what’s right.

Best fictional heroine EVER.

The character I’d slap:

RUMPLE-FUCKING-STILTSKIN.

I can’t believe it took me five and a half seasons to see how much of a douche he is. The final straw for me was when he killed Milah in the Underworld for the second time, dooming her to eternity in the River of Lost Souls. Forever salty about that.

And the way he treated Belle in season 6B UGH; fucking bastard and what an abusive creep. It would take me essays to explain why but just watch it and you’ll know.

A pairing that I love:

CAPTAIN SWAN. If you follow me, you know damn straight why. All the sorrow these two have endured is terrifying, but with each other, they learned to become stronger and better. OTP of all OTPs in HISTORY.

A pairing that I despise:

Tons, but Swan Queen tops the list. Blegh, she’s her step grandmother! Not to mention how abusive she is to her. If you can’t see it, you need to look harder.

Because a friend or a lover wouldn’t mind-rape you or kill your parents. If you disagree, I’m going to fucking drag you.

Sorry to end it on a sour, bitter note, but thanks for asking :) I love this fandom and this show and I was happy to answer them.

#ouat #killian jones #emma swan #captain swan #anti regina #anti rumple #belle #the charmings #my thoughts

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mrs-emma-swan-jones · 7 years ago

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So I think Dania Ramirez is gorgeous and seems like a total sweetheart. I really hope I enjoy Henry and Cinderella. I would give any OUAT spinoff a chance anyway, so I'm open to a new couple taking the spotlight. At the end of the day, these writers gave us Snowing and Captain Swan and I'll be forever grateful, so hopefully lead couple #3 is at least half as epic and I'll be good.

Yeah, she seems really sweet. I’d love for them to steal my heart like Snowing did in season 1. They were why I kept watching season 1, even if I had originally started watching to see where CS was headed. I won’t even hope that they’ll hold a candle to CS, because CS was like catching lightning in a bottle. They’re just never going to be able to do that again. But I’d like for Henry and Cinderella to be the new Snowing. It could be really good if they do it right.

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teamhook · 3 years ago

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Captain Swan Writers Spotlight

Hello, lovelies. I've decided to do a spotlight on Captain Swan writers. Fandom is not what it used to be, and we are lucky to have such a talented group. I want to highlight a new/underrated writer per post. We have new people, and I try to keep up, but sometimes I fail. Please, join me in showing them love. If you guys have any suggestions, let me know!

Up to the spotlight is:

She is not only a great writer but also an artist as her name says. Check out her work! I know she is not new but we all need to read her works.

TUMBLR

AO3 WORKS LINK

The Contract ~ MC - Complete

Summary: Emma had never wanted much in her life, despite being married to one of the richest men in the world. For ten years she has felt like a prisoner in her own marriage, denied the one thing she wants the most, but her husband cannot help but bargain her want like a cheap business deal. Enter Killian Jones, the Alpha her husband has hired to make sure she gets what she wants. And then some.

Okay, this one is an all time fave. I do love the A/O/B Universe thanks to her. This one is mostly complete. I believe it only needs an epilogue but it can be read as is.

But, There's Only One bed ~ One-Shot

Summary: Whilst trying to fly to Norway to visit his brother at Christmas, Killian Jones encounters a grounding snowstorm and a charmingly beautiful blonde who keeps him company at more than just the airport.

Just gotta say very sexy!!

Just One Yesterday ~ MC

Summary: Killian has always been in love with his best friend, Emma, but due to a childhood lost to crime, her brother and cop, David, is more than hateful towards him. When Emma turns up at his door and they share a night of passion, what follows, and the consequences, will test their love to the limit.

This one is super whumpy if you are into that but it's great. If you love Law and Order SVU you will enjoy this.

Sparking the Pavement ~ MC

Summary: Sparking the Pavement – When a motorcycle is leaned enough to drag the pegs, floorboards, exhaust or other metal parts on the road resulting in a shower of sparks.

Racing was like nothing else in the entire world. The rush of the wind as it hit the protective leathers, pushing the supple material into the limbs hidden inside, trying with all its might to dislodge a rider that would never let go. The rumble of the engine between thighs that gripped at the machine so tightly, muscles had formed on top of muscles there, powerful legs almost touching the ground on every corner, riders only braking momentarily before thrashing it out of the bend under the throaty roar of the bike.

They didn’t control the superbike. It controlled them.

OMG this one is so amazing! I love the idea of Killian being a bad ass Moto GP racer! Very sexy!!

Love Finds a Way ~ MC

Summary: Emma Swan is the Head of Operations for David Nolan’s exotic adventure park, Jurassic World. She has a son, Henry, and is loved and respected by her colleagues. Her life was perfect until a new dinosaur the park created, Indominus Rex, decided to escape. Oh, and her one night stand, Killian Jones - he’s there to help contain the asset. Just to complicate things even more. Jurassic World AU.

Well, if you are a Jurassic fan you will love this! I'm loving it!

King of My Heart ~ One-Shot

Summary: Emma Swan is the biggest star in the entire world, a world-class singer with a voice that had made sure she was seated at the very top. She is the Queen of music that speaks to so many, but there is one thing in her life she is missing, and with whole albums dedicated to him, will Killian Jones finally hear her words and take up the throne beside her as the King of her heart?

Singer!Emma and Drummer!Killian need I say more??

#Captain Swan #CSWS #Captain Swan Writers Spotlight

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gch1995 · 6 years ago

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I think this was season where I finally just got tired of this show, and I felt genuinely terrified about what would happen to my faves next. Yeah, that TLK was giving me hope that things could get better for Rumbelle, but every time A&E and these writers had given them hope for a special milestone in their lives on this show, or an opportunity for great character development that actually made sense, they would have Rumple and/or Belle (especially her) have a completely 180 degree spin in characterization.

At this point, I kind of thought that TLK wasn’t working because of Belle this time. Yeah, Rumple lashed out at her with that “just to wake you up” OOC bs in the UW, but he only said that in response to Belle after she unapologetically forced him to do what she wanted by stealing his dagger a third time to keep him from killing Gaston in immediate self-defense, and whiplashed him with false hope for their relationship a second time with that kiss, went to Zelena, and got that sleeping curse to put herself under to “protect” their unborn baby without his consent. However, we saw Rumple trying to do things Belle’s way, and making compromises. He had never asked her to change for him before. I was convinced that the TLK wasn’t working at this point because Belle refused to accept all of Rumple. Whenever he tried to make things work out with her in S5, he kept getting this weird whiplash she was giving him from one episode to the next in that was being used by the writers as a way to make him feel unworthy of love.

I was really getting annoyed by the OOC writing for Belle this season when she was on screen and fully conscious, aside from in “Bear and the Bow” (which was kind of OOC, too) because she was being used as a plot device to undermine any of Rumple’s attempts to be better, or just for A&E to further twist the knife into the Dearie/Rumbellers hearts that they did not care about Rumple or Rumbelle at all.

I didn’t want Rumple’s redemption arc to be all Belle’s responsibility, but now A&E and these writers were misusing her character as a whiplash of false hope for him having her undermine his attempts to make progress in his arc whenever she was awake on screen for more than those two Rumbelle-centric episodes, which were immediately retconned.

I liked that she suggested the Merlin/light magic prophecy thing for Rumple because it seemed like an interesting premise. If this show still made any fucking sense, if it was still intelligently written, if original and organic character development were still a thing, and if A&E still lived up to their self proclaimed message that this show was “about hope,” then I could promise you that they were going in that direction by putting Belle in a sleeping curse, so that Rumple could turn his curse into light magic by waking her with TLK...

But I didn’t have hope because this show was the very badly written “Captain Swan/Everybody Hates Rumple/Rumbelle Show,” and no one from the original cast had really developed in a way that felt at all organic, original, or satisfying ever since the end of 3A, least of all Rumple and Belle.

I’m honestly convinced that H00k, Regina, and Zelena were clearly the creators undeserving pets, who everyone else’s potential for better/redemption/development/original characterizations got screwed over to prop up, particularly Emma, Neal, Rumple, and by extension Belle who all “had” to be thrown under the bus in one way or another to make them look better post 3A.

I also think they originally meant to end the show with “Going Home,” but brought it back for Disney product and placement and H00k/CS because he was the only one who got any new sort of “development.” Except anyone still watching this trainwreck show with half a brain could easily tell that H00k hadn’t really gotten any better, he was still an inherently shitty person with a half-assed “redemption” arc that the writers were “selling” by making Rumple look terrible, and shining a spotlight on how much of the “worst” Rumple was.

If you think it gets any better after season five, then sadly, you’re wrong because this show was now fully run and written by gross, sexist, ableist, cruel, petty, and biased hacks, who never learned from their mistakes, no matter how much every fan called them out on their shit every time, and they had been slowly abandoning this show’s character driven integrity built by their mentor Damon Lindlelof from S1-2A ish for nearly five years now by turning OUAT into their self-insert male power fantasy/fanfiction on screen that disregarded any and all common sense, or input.

But, let’s pretend that this little slice of hope that they gave for Rumbellers in this arc of 5B was meant to finally give them the justice they deserved for both halves of our otp on this show, and that it wasn’t run by two vile little men who only seemed to be interested in giving hope to Rumbelle now just to tear it away abruptly for shits and giggles with character assassinating melodramatic magical soap opera “twists” that made less and less sense ever since the end of 3B.

Let’s pretend that the writing on this show’s piss poor excuse for canon still made realistic and organic sense whenever it gave you potential plot lines to actually do something new, compelling, and logical, only to drop them in favor of doing something wildly OOC, too stupid to believe, and often incredibly character assassinating for romantic couples on this show.

Let’s pretend that Belle’s love for Rumple didn’t switch on and off like a light switch from one episode to the next in a timeline of a day or less these days, and that she was still written consistently like a realistic human being with any sort of realistic human reactions, emotions, or strongly rooted believable individual admirable character traits anymore, and she didn’t change her mind about what she wanted and what she didn’t want for the plot to give Rumple and the audience a whiplash of (now often false) hope for redemption/reconciliation in favor of using her as a plot device for inexplicably contrived, stupid, and now often OOC and character assassinating Drama™️ for both their individual characters and relationship to cartoonishly vilify him in the narrative with some magical fuckery “twist,” whether it made sense or not, so that they could prop up Hook/CS onto a pedestal they didn’t deserve.

Let’s pretend that this show had’t become a total pit of despair and melodrama where characters got away with doing fucked up things to each other in the narrative all the time unless they were Rumple.

Let’s pretend that A&E and these writers were at all interested in trying to write a character driven, healthy, realistic, and complex slow-burn conflict and resolution between Rumple and Belle with a narrative that treated them as equally responsible for hurting each other without the narrative of “It’s ‘okay’ for Belle to hurt Rumple by leading him on with false hope, giving him ultimatums, controlling him with the dagger, banishing him from his home, and emotionally manipulating him by using his love for her as a weapon because she’s the designated hero, but if Rumple does the same, then it’s alll on him and because he’s the designated villain.”

Let’s face it, at this point in the canon narrative where you’re at now, Rumple had still never treated Belle nearly as badly as she had treated him on the show because abuse requires a direct target of illogical cruelty, anger, and control/restriction of the the victim, whether intentional or unintentional. He had lied, he had taken away Belle’s choices by keeping her in the dark in S4, and it was awful. She had every right to be angry. But that wasn’t abuse. At this point, Rumple had still never led Belle on with false hope for his feelings about her. He had still never treated her with irrational and needless cruelty, or accused for his problems in their present day relationship (aside from that one OOC conversation in the UW, which Belle triggered needlessly by blaming Rumple for “having” to “taint” her “pure” heart to save his life, and by going to Zelena). He had still never restricted her from being able to do this or that, given her ultimatums, acted like a hypocrite, or asked for her to change who she was in order for them to be together. He still had never given any of his enemies the means to hurt Belle, while she was going off and handing Rumple’s real dagger to H00k like it was no big deal. He still had never been lacking in empathy for Belle’s pain when she broke down in front of him, nor had he ever been unwilling to offer her emotional support when she reached out to him for it. He still had never blamed Belle for banishing him with nothing across the town line when he really should have.

I didn’t exactly like how he was being so vague and cryptic about the more sympathetic reasons behind why he took back the curse, but other than the fact that he was just being badly written, almost every time he had tried to be brokenly honest and emotionally vulnerable with Belle in S4 and S5, she either pushed him away with needless cruelty and refused to let him get a word in edgewise, gave him false hope, and no longer asked questions whenever things seemed off about Rumple because the writers dumbed her down.

I’m not going to talk about the horrific OOC travesty of 6A Rumbelle on both sides, but you’ll understand why most of us in the Dearie/Rumbelle fandom refuse to acknowledge it as legit canon Rumbelle when you see it. However, with the place you’re at right now in canon, it definitely seemed like Belle was coming off as the emotionally abusive one in the Rumbelle relationship, not Rumple. I was really worried that the writers were never going to address it as problematic behavior on Belle’s side of the relationship, and instead have her continue to get away with it until Rumple finally snapped, and treated her like the villain she kept unfairly pinning him as to try to “even out the playing fields,” and pretend like Belle was his “blameless victim,” even as she triggered his breaking point almost every step of the way.

Let’s pretend that Rumple would restore Belle’s faith in him to be able to be the one to turn the curse into light magic by waking her with TLK, and that we’d see a reunited Rumbelle learning to trust each other again, both of them being heroes together to stop external forces, and both of them getting fluffy and domestic pregnancy.

I would have believed it possible back in S1-2A, but on this show run by two unsupervised hacks who essentially openly admitted in interviews that they didn’t care about organic character/storytelling integrity, continuity, or writing that made any kind of sense for the audience to watch on screen anymore because they thought it was more “edgy” to mindfuck them by doing something incredibly stupid, “shocking,” and convoluted by pulling the rug out from under them instead, I really didn’t believe it to be possible in canon anymore.

One thing I think a lot of fans overlook about Rumple’s character, especially in later seasons with the OOC bad writing for him, is that, for a self-proclaimed villain, he sure does have a pretty huge martyr/hero complex too, which is why he fell in love with Belle in the first place. It is why I liked that he was interested in trying to do it in this episode, and in 5B before Belle did that 180 on him. It’s why he first took on the curse. He wanted to be a hero, but it’s very deeply buried under centuries of self-loathing, self-doubt, fear, abandonment issues, and the corruptive influence of the darkest of curses, which is why his biggest moments of redemption on this show tend to be in big self-sacrificing selfless grand gestures to protect his loved ones/do the right thing.

The thing with Belle was that she didn’t seem willing to let Rumple have a say, she didn’t make an attempt to try to fix things between them by making compromises with him after “Bear and the Bow” and “Her Handsome Hero,” and she was going back on her own personal values and the things that she insisted that she didn’t want Rumple doing when it convenienced her with a shifting demeanor and set of ideals that changed from one episode to the next as quickly as the flick of a light switch.

The thing with Belle is that she no longer had any deep, complex, consistent, or admirable strongly rooted values that felt like they meant anything anymore in canon because they changed her characterization faster than someone changed clothes, they were rooted much more in an incredibly shallow image of knights in shining armor, sword fighting, physical strength/endurance, and “trying to fit in with the cool kids” mentality by being anti-Rumple with the rest of her “friends” to vilify him, rather than empathy, perception, intelligence, common sense, or real kindness that the S2 Belle got from within her heart with “You can’t tell what’s really in a person’s heart until you truly know them.” Her personal values all got abandoned whenever they “needed” to vilify Rumple, or give him pointless drama these days to slowly break his already fragile heart and sanity by giving him unnecessary pain.

The thing with Belle in canon was that she had lost what truly made her admirably heroic and strong as a character back in the early days of OUAT because they had twisted her heroism into OOC, inconsistent, cruel, shallow, stupid, and petty hypocrisy and enabling of all her “friends” in this ridiculous quest they put her on to try to “fit in with the cool kids” by vilifying Rumple that would have honestly made the real!Belle of “Skin Deep” to the end of S3 feel truly mortified.

Oh, A&E and the writers would pretend they cared by having Belle spout platitudes of love, heroism, and how she’d always seen the man beneath the monster in a few episodes, but they didn’t really have her practice what she preached anymore when it mattered the most, or they had her string Rumple along with false hope because they “needed” to vilify Rumple, or they “needed” her character to give him pointless drama by constantly breaking him.

Belle was treating him just like everyone else on the show did now whenever she was awake for more than an episode on screen this season, a herocrite, except she had the privilege of being truly loved by Rumple, so she knew she could emotionally manipulate his feelings for her to get him on her side to help her out with magic whenever it suited her needs. Then, Belle would whiplash him again abruptly with OOC, blind self-righteousness, hypocrisy, or cruelty in response for no reason by telling him off, telling him what to do, refusing to let him have a say, or get a word in edgewise, belittling him, being a hypocrite by insisting that “heroes never resorted to darkness to be a hero,” and that Rumple could not use dark magic to do what he felt was right when it didn’t suit her, even when he wasn’t abusing it, and even though she had objectively both used and abused dark magic on several occasions now, quite often unapologetically ever since “Heroes and Villains,” in fact, whenever it was convenient for her ever since her debut episode on the show.

The Belle of OUAT had always been strictly anti-murder and magic when it was being committed for revenge, or selfish choices. She was only against magic/power when it was being abused, or Rumple was hiding behind the mask of the Dark One to shut her out. But she wasn’t against magic being used in immediate self-defense, using it to do little things, such as recreating the BATB Disney dance scene for them, and searching for Bae in New York with it.

The Belle I loved would never ever abuse the dagger on Rumple more than once, or be so cruel as to banish him with nothing across the town line forever when she didn’t need to. And, at worst, even if she did do it in the heat of the moment of her anger, the Belle I loved would have felt way more visibly guilty about it on screen than the Belle we saw in this piss poor excuse for canon afterwards, and she would have immediately apologized to Rumple afterwards when she saw him again in Storybrooke in tears when she met him again in that shop scene where he collapsed on the floor, dying from his blackening heart.

The Belle I loved would never ever leave Rumple all alone in Storybrooke in a coma on the brink of death for seven weeks just to go and save Emma in Camelot with little to no deliberation the second the Blue Fairy (the same shady fairy who gave Bae that magic bean to go to the land without magic, which led to Rumple losing him) gave her that pitiful rose in a jar for BATB Disney product placement purposes.

Granted, we never saw her and Rumple talk about the extenuating circumstances and factors that led to Bae falling through that portal when he let go of his hand in a moment of blind fear, but they were still making Belle look stupid and careless by not asking Blue any questions, and just leaving Rumple all alone on the brink of life and death for seven weeks with little to no deliberation or hesitation in a town in which she knows that no one else but her gives a genuine damn about him (and on rare occasions David/Charming and Henry, but they weren’t even there at the time to stay behind with him, anyway), just to go and act as a free and unappreciated walking/talking babysitter, while they all went off to save Emma.

Even if she “had” to leave Rumple behind in a coma for seven weeks in Storybrooke in the brink between life and death just to go and help Emma with the others, the least they could have done was given her more time on screen with Rumple to say goodbye to him, and shown her making arrangements with the others in Storybrooke who stayed behind with him to promise to watch over him and putting him in a hospital with Whale to check his vitals. It was still wildly OOC for Belle to just take that pitifully iconic rose in a jar of stupid Disney BATB product placement from the Blue Fairy, while immediately leaving the love of her life all alone in a coma for seven weeks just to go and help Emma with little to no hesitation.

The Belle I loved would never ever be needlessly cruel to Rumple by making his life feel worthless to her through saying shit like “Just to save you,” or “You’ll only make me do something I’ll regret” after “tainting” her now artificially “purified” heart in the piss poor canon to save him in the heat of the moment.

The Belle I loved would never cut Rumple off mid sentence, or cruelly shut him down whenever he did try to reach out to her brokenly, honestly, and/or gently for compassion, emotional support, and understanding just because she didn’t want to hear the truth because it was too hard for her to hear, or it went against her own now completely unrealistically changeable beliefs.

The Belle I loved would have made healthy compromises with Rumple, rather than acting like a blindly hypocritical and self-righteous brat.

Belle had never enabled Rumple’s problematic or toxic behavior in their relationship back in the early days, and she had never been a doormat to him. I never wanted that type of Belle for Rumple either. What I wanted and what I really missed was the Belle who listened to Rumple compassionately when he reached out to her honestly and brokenly by asking questions, and being willing to understand him and offer advice, though. I really missed the Belle who saw through his “This is who I am” mask bullshit, and pushed him to tell her what he was hiding because right now Rumple was wearing something of a mask because he didn’t want to get hurt by her again with this “This is who I am” crap, probably because of what happened at the well. and it should have been obvious to Belle that something was off. It would have been obvious to the Belle of S2, that there were walls that Rumple was hiding behind a little because he kept getting shut down by her whenever he had been emotionally vulnerable ever since S4.

I didn’t want a Belle, who was needlessly, overdramatically, and sometimes even triggeringly cruel to Rumple by kicking him when he was up and kicking him when he was already down, and only offering him scraps of affection when he was convenient to her, getting portrayed like the best relationship he could ever have because it shouldn’t have been. I didn’t want a Belle for Rumple who was given an almost total lack of empathy for him.

Now, she refused to make compromises with him. The Belle I loved would never ever put up with Hook and especially not Zelena’s shit, and she would never willingly go to them for help over her true love.

The Belle I loved would never ever let Regina get away with stealing her heart to use as leverage against Rumple.

The Belle I loved was a virtuist by nature, but not incapable of understanding that she sometimes needed to use darkness in the heat of the moment, or make morally gray decisions in self-defense. Remember the badass Belle from S2 who attempted to murder Hook in immediate self-defense when she unhesitatingly pushed that series of heavy bookcases in his direction to try to crush him when he cornered her in the library to try and kill her? LOL, me too! Too bad Adam and Eddy and these writers didn’t seem to.

The Belle I loved from OUAT was a badass cinammon roll! She didn’t like others being murdered for revenge, she didn’t like it when magic got abused, or when Rumple hid behind it, but she saw the man behind it. She was an idealist, but she also had common sense, intelligence, maturity, intuition, and empathy. She wasn’t above physically hurting others without hesitation in immediate self-defense when they threatened her or her loved ones well-being. She had strongly rooted heroic values in bravery, compassion, curiousity, honesty, open-mindedness, equal opportunity, perceptiveness, mercy, and second chances.

This Belle, I recognized less and less as my Belle on the show ever since the end of 3B. She seemed more like a plot device to push Rumple forwards or backwards in his arc, and it was doing a huge disservice to both of their individual characters and relationship together.

Rumple was not innocent of his faults in his relationship with Belle, but the narrative constantly pointed that out. They didn’t with Belle, though, and I was getting tired of it because she had. I just wanted for her to acknowledge that she had fucked up with Rumple just as much in their relationship, and if she couldn’t give him the chance to try, or give him the chance to fight for her in canon when she woke up, I just wanted for Rumple’s redemption arc to be for his unborn child and/or another healthy main adult character/relationship on the show that was either platonic or romanticwith someone who actually gave him the chance to fight for them....There weren’t many characters left who hadn’t been so thoroughly butchered in canon in the main cast at this point that I’d want him with Rumple romantically or platonically besides Belle...Archie, Jefferson, or David, I guess.

But this current canon version of Belle was not good for Rumple, and soon it wouldn’t be good for either of them to be together if this Belle didn’t make up her mind about her personal values and feelings for Rumple, learn to start fighting for Rumple, or leave him for good. I really hated this emotional tug of war she was playing with his heart, blatant hypocrisy, lack of empathy, inability to own up to her own mistakes, and abrupt vilification of Rumple out of nowhere, even when he did nothing to deserve it from her.

It couldn’t be healthy for either of them in canon, if Belle kept getting characterized in this way. If Belle didn’t start fighting back for Rumple when she woke up, continued to refuse to give him the chance to fight for her, continued to refuse to let him have a say, and continued to not offer compassion and understanding whenever he did try to reach out to her brokenly and honestly, then I didn’t want her with Rumple in a canon romantic relationship when she woke up because she was slowly breaking his already fragile mental health by being written this way, so that they could vilify him.

If Belle kept up this wildly OOC, unrealistic, and unhealthy emotional whiplash as a device for their plot twists of giving her contrived and unrealistic reasons to go from being loving to being pissed off at Rumple within a timeline of less than a day, instead of looking at both her and Rumple’s real and in-character issues equally, so that they could misuse her as a plot device to vilify him or hurt him by triggering his breaking point, and continued to portray her as the “blameless victim,” then I really didn’t want this version of her character with him romantically in canon as currently written again when she woke up because it wouldn’t be healthy for either one of their mental healths.

If only one person in the relationship is ever expected to make changes for the better and own up to their mistakes, then it’s not a healthy relationship, and so far Belle seemed to be the one unwilling to own up to making mistakes, not Rumple.

She didn’t even have any sort of admirable, believable, strongly rooted, or compelling set of personal values that she stuck to for more than one episode anymore because they had butchered her into such an illogically OOC hypocritical plot device in Rumple’s story, who broke her own personal values of proclaimed heroism, not wanting him to use dark magic but using it herself when it suited her, and her faith and encouragement in his potential ability to turn the curse into light magic within a day.

The reason why most people in the Dearie/Rumbelle fandom tended to side with Rumple more than Belle was because she was written by A&E and their team of hacks as more of plot device for Rumple’s story than an actual realistic human being and character after “Skin Deep” in canon from the moment she became a main character in the cast in S2, and they decided that she would never have any sort of realistic reaction or signs of trauma after being locked up for 28 years.

At least they mostly wrote Belle’s character as an individually and consistently admirable, badass, intelligent, optimistic, loving, perceptive, open-minded, humble, and empathetic heroic young woman in S2-S3, though. She may have just been a love interest in Rumple’s storyline. She may have gotten mini-fridged for Rumple’s man pain way more often than I would have liked. I had gotten annoyed with the Lacey arc. I had gotten annoyed that she wasn’t in Neverland with Rumple. I had gotten annoyed that she didn’t have any realistic traumatic reactions to being imprisoned. While I always loved Rumbelle and only have ever shipped them with each other in canon and fanon romantically once I found out about it in “Skin Deep,” I was annoyed that Belle didn’t get more storylines outside of just Rumple. She was a MPDG side character in Rumple’s story after Bae as the second most important person in his life, who he loved, which was a bit annoying.

But at least A&E didn’t outright destroy the beauty of both her and Rumple’s individual characterizations, integrity, and relationship together on screen for character assassinating Soap Opera Drama™️ by using her as a mindless plot device with no consistent individual psyche or personality of her own to vilify Rumple. At least, they let Robert and Emilie shine doing it by writing Belle as a good love interest for Rumple and vice versa in the few scenes/episodes they were in who consistently brought out the best in each other (aside from the Lacey crap).

Yeah, it was annoying that Belle didn’t have more of a story outside of Rumple that enhanced her character. However, at least they weren’t outright destroying the beauty of what little believable consistent individual characterization she had in her screen time by turning her into a mindless puppet on strings without a psyche of her own mid season four as a plot device to push Rumple forwards and backwards in his redemption arc with their spitefully misogynistic, OOC, character assassinating, and stupid “Everybody Hates Rumple, and Hook is the bestest ‘hero’ EVAH ” bullshit narrative.

That’s not an excuse for his bad choices in their relationship either, but at this point in the canon narrative, she was being written as just as much, if not more of a toxic influence in Rumple’s life to be that was not good for his mental health.

That is not me saying that Belle alone should have been responsible for Rumple’s redemption arc, their should have been internalized character development on this show too, but there really wasn’t in these characters because A&E and these writers didn’t have the talent or skill to write that, so that it was what it was.

I found it annoying that there was this set of double standards against Rumple from S4-S6 that he had to want to change for himself, and not for Belle, or anyone else, even though no one really gave him a good reason to try to change, and learn from his mistakes when none of them really ever did either, and they rejected his every attempt to try to be better, or do the right thing by derailing in the writing themselves and rejecting him, anyway.

Everyone expected Rumple to change for the better from S4-S6 for himself, even though no one else had really changed for the better themselves either, and mostly gotten worse themselves too. Yet they got away with it because the writers loved them, they were “redeemed” or “heroic,” and/or they gave them a strong support system of loved ones, who let them get away with the same shit, if not worse that they demonized Rumple so mercilessly for so much as considering doing so mercilessly.

Rumple had lied, had kept Belle in the dark about his shady plans, and he had taken away her say in all of it in S4. It was awful. It was wrong. However, he had never done any of it with any sort of cruelty, or any desire to control her in S4. He was being selfish, dishonest, and an emotional coward in S4. Not abusive, though, because abusive behavior requires a pattern of having a direct target of cruelty, and overreactions in someone’s behavior with another person, whether they be intentional or unintentional.

That is not me saying that Belle didn’t have every right to be angry with him for lying to her, and breaking up with him. But at this point in the series, Rumple had still never been cruel to Belle, he had never blamed her for his problems, he he had never insulted or belittled her, he had never stolen her autonomy (aside from that one little half-second freezing spell he cast on her in 4x01, which was wrong and gross, I’ll give you that), he had never given his enemies the means to control her or destroy her, he had never asked for her to change for him, and he had never led her on with false hope for their relationship. Belle had been doing, had done, had said, and was still doing and saying one or more of these abusive behaviors with Rumple on the show more than once now, and she was still getting away with most of it in 5B and portrayed as “heroic.”

As far as I was seeing at this point on the show, Belle was getting more points from me for being the emotionally/verbally abusive one in the relationship in canon between them than Rumple as currently written from S4-S5, which bothered me because how long was it going to take before his sanity and patience with her finally snapped?

Of course, it wouldn’t excuse Rumple for finally lashing out at Belle in response either. It would still be wildly OOC, shitty, and gross. Of course, I didn’t believe that Belle would ever “deserve any of it” from Rumple for being a bitch to him either. I would still be angry with him. I still wouldn’t excuse him either.

I’m not an abuse apologist, I’m not a misogynist, but I knew that if Rumple ever finally snapped with Belle by finally overreacting to her needless cruelty, the show’s piss poor excuse for a canon narrative would still be painting him as the “total monster who’s all to blame for his issues with Belle, who I was supposed to hate,” while Belle was still being portrayed as the “blameless victim of Rumple and the hero, who I was supposed to want to protect from her EVOL estranged ex-husband, and wrap in a blanket to hide from the world, even as she needlessly drove Rumple to his breaking point every step of the way by pushing all of his buttons over and over again for far longer in the canon narrative of their their broken relationship first by being written as uncharacteristically, needlessly, and triggeringly cruel, overreactional, hypocritical, petty, unapologetic, emotionally manipulative, and stupid from the moment she started abusing the dagger back in S4, even though he was still the only one who genuinely loved Belle for being Belle and cared about her when push came to shove, and even though none of her other so-called ‘friends’ gave a shit about her.”

That doesn’t mean that I think Belle would “deserve abuse” from Rumple in response, or that I would excuse him for overreacting and finally snapping at her either. No, I would still call him out for it, too, I would still think it was wildly OOC, and I would still feel angry. However, I would just be acknowledging that Belle provoked Rumple needlessly first by constantly overreacting, constantly making him feel unlovable, and emotionally/mentally abusing him for far longer now on the show ever since she had started using the dagger in S4, and even though everyone cheered “hero” in the GA and narrative when she abused Rumple, he would still be mercilessly vilified and framed as the “worst” for it, though.

Of course, neither of them would be allowed to escape each other healthily from the vicious cycle because the show wouldn’t allow them to have anyone else but each other to rely on for support, so they made them both OOC when they separated.

The Rumbelle relationship was so one-sided now, the show was so pettily anti-Rumple now, and the writing was so overdramatically soap operaishly OOC plot versus character driven these days that there were no lows I didn’t believe them capable of not sinking to with overdramatically OOC toxic romantic magical plot fuckery Drama™️ after what they did to CS in 5A.

I was tired of having to take sides between Rumple and Belle. I was tired of Belle getting figuratively and literally forced into this box that she did not fit in the narrative of S4 and S5 as this “super pure, blameless, and strong abuse victim of Rumple.” If anything, Rumple had more often been the victim of Belle’s emotional/verbal abuse ever since she started abusing the dagger in S4, and I was worried that they were going to vilify him by having him finally snap to “justify” Belle’s OOC inexcusably shitty treatment of him, and to “make up” for what they did to CS in 5A, no matter how little sense it made.

Of course, A&E and the writers forgot the fact that just because they made Rumple look horrible, just because they made him do inexcusably shitty OOC “shocking” horrible things to the other characters, it still didn’t absolve any of them from their inexcusably shitty treatment of him, or any of their inexcusable crimes. Just because they might make Rumple do inexcusably horrible things to them, it still didn’t absolve Emma, Hook, Belle, Regina, Zelena, Snow, or even Henry for their inexcusably shitty treatment of Rumple, or excuse them from their hypocrisy, or felonies/crimes.

I just didn’t need to see that potentially happening to Rumbelle next season. I didn’t need to see canon!Rumple potentially getting tainted for me. Not after what happened with CS in 5A. Not after the Rumbelle drama with the irrevocable damage done to Belle’s character in S4 and S5 that tainted her for me in canon being more than bad enough in the canon narrative as it already was, which is why I finally quit watching after 5B.

This show was way too disappointingly and “shockingly” predictable at this point with its inorganic storylines and arcs, especially for Rumbelle, which is sad because A&E claimed this show was about “hope,” and led us to believe that they loved Rumbelle for nearly the first two-ish seasons of the show once upon a time (pun intended). I guess they got distracted by CS.

I’ll always love the in-character Rumbelle of S1-S3 in canon, and some in-character moments/episodes on screen after that. Of course, I’ll always love, ship, read, and write amazing fanon Rumbelle! However, it really seemed to me now that in canon, while both Rumple and Belle had done bad things to each other, this version of Belle seemed to be the one getting written as the more triggeringly emotionally abusive one in the narrative to him, who was now often breaking his already fragile heart, patience, and sanity, sometimes unapologetically and deliberately now, which really was starting to make me scared for Rumple and how they would misuse her character to hurt him, or ruin him when she was awake.

But A&E and these writers must have felt so proud for ruining canon Belle so much for me that it made me dread what would happen next to her and Rumple’s characters/relationship on screen next with how much they were writing her like such a inconsistently OOC mindless emotional whiplash to vilify her beast.

They really had run out of ideas now, and were so desperate to prop up Crapstain Swan that they were actually making Belle, another formerly strong female and feminist character into an OOC emotionally abusive, artificially pure, and hypocritical whiplash and plot device in her story with the man who she was supposed to bring out the good in by being misused by these writers to needlessly shatter his already fragile heart and sanity, so they could vilify him, while she acted like a doormat to a bunch of her so-called “friends,” who treated her like shit with no apologies to spare.

Meanwhile, they were turning Emma Swan into a codependent, violent, and annoying damsel-in-distress, who abandoned her family and personal values, so that she and Killy!Poo could be framed as the “most healthy couple on this show” when really they were just the gross, cheap, and shallow conventionally attractive rip off version of Rumbelle that Eddy had a boner for. These writers honestly disgusted me with their obsession over Hook/CS, which seemed to lead to the utter destruction of two truly strong female heroines, Emma and Belle, and the only truly compelling original non-gender conforming male lead, Rumple.

Hook’s inherently toxic masculinity and misogyny being romanticized by Neal’s death, the utter destruction of three beautiful characters, and the show’s most beautiful, compelling, complex, and entertaining non conventional het ship on this show, really pissed me off to no end. He was like an infection that spread all over everything that truly made this show great.

I know that there is nothing I can say to you that will make you change your mind about not watching next season, but just remember that it’s “Once Upon a Hook” now, or “Once Upon a Wasted Potential.” But our favorite characters and ships essentially died on screen in 3A. Our Emma, our Rumple, our Belle, our Rumbelle, our Snow, our David, our Snowing, our Regina, and our Henry all essentially died in “Going Home,” and live on in the only thing about OUAT left that generally still makes sense, and feels worth staying in this fandom for: OUAT fanfiction on ao3 and ff.net for Rumbelle, Swanqueen, and Swanfire.

There were hints of the fantastic characters/ships they once were here and there on this awful crack!fic OUAT soap opera AU on screen, but for the most part these characters/ships were now just hollowed out shells of the wasted potential of their former selves driven by purely external OOC magical plot fuckery, writer favoritism, and soap opera angst that was so ridiculously badly written, forced, inconsistent, melodramatic, unrealistic, and stupid that it wasn’t even worth blaming the characters for any of it anymore at this point on this tragically laughable joke of a wasted potential television show. A&E and their team of hacks fucked them all up. Blame them for destroying our favorite characters in favor of OOC, stupid, and plot driven melodrama, not the characters themselves. I could understand if any of it made realistic or logical sense, but it had made less and less realistic and logical sense for six seasons now, then completely derailed past the point of no return after “Going Home” because two-and-half seasons of consistent, justified, original, satisfying, and mostly believable character development and characterization was clearly all that Adam and Eddy could handle coming up with on their own when they were so plot versus character driven after Damon Lindlelof left.

OP IS SPOILER FREE!

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“firebird” impressions

{Quick request to anyone reading: I’m watching OUaT for the first time, and I want to avoid spoilers. So, if you want to discuss something spoilery, I’d be grateful if you could start a new post for that. Thank you!}

OK, let’s just lead with the headlines:

Belle in a box!

…OK, there was more to the episode, but this is definitely the funniest bit. Not much else to laugh about, really. This is finale territory, after all, which means almost everything is Dire and Serious.

Told you.

More under the cut.

Keep reading

#the show died in 3A and was officially buried with S5-S7 #rumbelle critical but really anti ouat writers #belle critical but really ouat writing critical #anti kitsowitz #anti cs #anti ouat writers #anti ouat

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