#CW// death

[whsprings]

once upon a time I was in treatment with a woman named Rachel-- i dont remember her last name and wouldnt post it regardless. anyway, there was also a relatively well known tiktoker named Rachel that posted about ed stuff and they were soooo similar that i often wonder if they're the same person. only thing is that tiktok Rachel passed a while ago. idk I just think about the Rachel I knew and wonder how she's doing and if she is still alive, especially knowing the condition she left treatment in. the consequences of using behaviors, especially over long periods of time, feel so far off, but they're really not. I know I often talk about wanting to let my ed run its course but even in saying that I do not want to die, or at least not in a suicidal way, moreso in a hopeless, can't see a future worth fighting for way. god, I just wish things were different for so many people.

[wouldyoustayvn]

What would Virgil do if his Galaxy died? Like,, first reaction, how would he cope(if at all), would Virgil move on, etc

CW// mentions of death

Man, Virgil does not take Galaxy’s death well at all.

For as long as Virgil can remember, Virgil couldn’t take the concept of death too well after the death of someone he deeply care about. Loosing Galaxy is just reliving the same feeling when he lost him. He couldn’t take it. He hates this feeling so much. Why them? Why do they have to go through such a terrible fate? He cries, screaming and begging for his beloved Galaxy. He thought he could accept death after taking therapy, but after become self aware, all the therapy sessions he went through, the time to recover after his death, has all go down the drain.

How does he cope? He travels to Galaxy’s world, enter their room, laying on their bed and weep. Softly crying out for their name as he hugged their pillow. He never get to move on, he’s so hung up about galaxy’s death that he stays in this dreadful world he called home. He couldn’t handle to look at other timelines where their alive. It’s too much for Virgil. He’s too afraid that if he did, he’ll breakdown once again. And he wouldn’t want them to him like this.

[w4t3rgun]

//SPOILERS TO TWISTED, IT TAKES 2 HOURS AND FREE ON YOUTUBE, JUST SO YOU CAN UNDERSTAND WHAT I'M SAYING (WARNING: IT'S MATURE. VERY MATURE AND COULD HAVE POTENTIAL TRIGGERING TOPICS.//

ALSO TW/CW; DEATH, MURDER, STOCKHOLM SYNDROME MENTION, OVERBLOTS, EXECUTIONS. PLEASE TELL ME IF I MISSED ANYTHING.//

This is all serious. I'm being genuine right now. Please do read the content warnings. Thank you.

This is the final warning to scroll away for your sake, because I don't know if you will be triggered or left uncomfortable with this.

So. I recently I watched a thing called "Twisted"; a story about the Untold Story about the Royal Vizier, it's a very mature version of Aladdin but it's Ja'far's point of view. It's also to mock the movie I believe?? Idk.

But one of it's songs, "Twisted" in specific, caught my eye.

I'm a big fan of TWST (obviously, you can see it by my blog/account) but the song had... Interesting information and I'd like to analyze it.

So, if you decided not to watch or listen to the song, let me sum it up for you:

Aladdin convinced the Sultan that Ja'far is a sorcerer and the Sultan believed him. Ja'far ran away because they were planning to execute him. But then while he's being sad, the other Disney "Villains" (Ursla, Scar, Gaston, Maleficent, Hook, and Cruella)

Why am I air quoting the villains?

Their parts in the song reveal their true intentions and why they are the way they are.

Ursla was a good ruler, but overthrown by her brother, aka Ariel's dad, due to him believing "women should be seen and never heard" (exact line from the song) but she just wanted continue being a good ruler but became a "villain" to get what she lost due to her brother.

Gaston loved Bell and wanted to save her from the "buffalo monster" (his words, not mine) and thought it's unhealthy that she fell in love with the said monster. It is. And it's called Stockholm Syndrome. And if I'm honest, he's got a point. It is unhealthy that she fell in love with a capturer.

Scar was progressive. "Both hyenas and lions lived in perfect harmony" (exact lyrics) but his brother, aka Mufasa, ate his cubs and made him and the hyenas go back. Which is probably the reason he hated Simba, Mufasa ate his cubs and yet he got a cub. He just wanted everyone to be in harmony, yet his brother didn't listen.

Maleficent didn't get much but she got the fact she wanted to be included and invited to the party. "I only wanted to be invited to the party." (Lyrics).

Neither did Hook but he had a point, "I just wanted to teach the boy responsibility!" (Lyrics) and he's got a point, he wanted to teach the lost kids how to be responsible and he also said/sung, "I never knew my father!" (Lyrics) Which is probably implying that he just wanted to be a father figure to them when he never had one.

Cruella... She only got one line and she said, "I only wished to have a coat made out of puppies!" And yeah. Nothing much to say about her.

Now. Why am I bringing all this up? Is it because the musical was great and genuinely made me cry? (It did but that's not the point here)

I would've said cuz connections but there is none. Instead, I'm giving a AU idea.

Azul's cousin is Rielle (or in my case, Ari) and they, Rielle, stole the lounge or something like that when Azul was supposed to have it. Cue Azul overblot pt. 2

Leona is Scar obviously, but it does make sense in this AU that he hates kids. He got his own kid(s) who were y'know... Killed... By his brother. But he also just wanted to live in peace, it doesn't happen.

Gaston is Coach Vargas. I don't really know what to say about him?? Like Stockholm Syndrome... For his lover... I guess you can make a Male! Belle (listen my gay uncle Vargas hc is here and you can't stop me) fall in love with the Buffalo guy who kidnapped him and Vargas is just watching like "Bro.... No."

But for Maleficent... It's already canon for Malleus so it doesn't count.

Hook doesn't have a canon character. But it's implied that the fairies are like Tinkerbell and stuff so... Idk.

Cruella and Crewel... I don't have anything for the two. They're already practically the same... Minus the puppies.

But what about... Ja'far and Jamil? Aladdin dude in RSA probably convinced (more like manipulated but go off Ig.) the Sultan aka Kalim that Jamil is untrustworthy and must be executed. Kalim didn't agree but his parents did so Jamil had to run away before the execution. With Kalim's help of course!

And here we are. The unfortunate paths of them.

The Vizier TWST AU.

... :)

So in conclusion, it's 9:19 pm for me, I'm sick, and I just thought of this for no reason.

I would appreciate if you give any feedback or something but I truly don't care if you don't, I appreciate you for sitting/standing/laying/anything through this random adventure.

And I'm open for any questions, if you want to make a fanfic on this, go ahead. Just tag me cuz I like seeing other works!

Good day/night,

Void aka w4t3rgun

[walpster]

Hey hey hey

Sorry for being pretty inactive this month (and the last month lol).

The truth is that my Mum died in June so posting my two stories that centre around mothers has been a little taxing on me mentally as of late.

I still really like it and I have fun doing it, but planning out things and even doing my tiny bits of dialogue can be draining on me without me even realising.

Don’t worry though, I still love the sims and I still love coming up with stories!

I know that you guys will totally understand, but I just thought I’d give a little explanation :)

Love you!!

[mush-dooms]

you ever think about how fucking surreal it is that my life just keeps on going while others are coming to violent ends?

[sacrificedshe-moved]

𝙷𝙴𝙰𝙳𝙲𝙰𝙽𝙾𝙽 :     𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝙳𝙴𝙰𝚃𝙷 𝙰𝙽𝙳 𝚂𝙰𝙲𝚁𝙸𝙵𝙸𝙲𝙴 𝙾𝙵 𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝙻𝙰𝙳𝚈 𝙻𝚄𝙽𝙰𝙵𝚁𝙴𝚈𝙰.

it is well known among those who’s spent their time besides the oracle that performing her duties often take a toll upon her health and longevity. ravus reflects back on his moments he had last spent with luna prior to her summoning of the leviathan, weak and seemingly in pain, begging him to deliver the ring to noctis. she confesses that her “flesh is failing” and that she “lacks the strength to go on”, direct results from her continuous relations with the gods. by the time she is in altissia, her body is incredibly weak and her life fading (as i headcanon that each communication takes a bit of her own vitality); and lunafreya only weakens herself further by summoning the leviathan. she disguises this well with her general air of confidence and determination, however, her weakness is apparent in her battle against the sea goddess, struggling to block her attacks. by the time ardyn finds her, lunafreya is severely weakened, we see her collapsing atop the altar -- out of breath and trembling -- the wound inflicted upon her the final blow that leads her to tread the line of life and death.

bleeding out and with little strength left, luna finds herself with a choice -- to reserve her strength and ensure the possibility of a life after these events, or to use what little strength remains to save noctis and ensure his destiny and her duty. she, of course, being the ever-dutiful woman she is -- choses to fulfill her destiny in assisting noctis. she uses what little strength she has left sparingly,  calling upon the kings of old, protecting him from the tidal wave, and finally to say goodbye... the latter, the final nail in her coffin... 

it is possible that luna might had survived if she had chosen not to say goodbye to noctis; however, her dedication kept her ever from thinking of reserving any breath for herself, proven in the way she willingly leans back into the waves, with her arms wide open, in order to transfer her final breath to noctis, reviving him instead of herself...her final sacrifice. it was her choice to say goodbye, to use what little life she had left for the sake of noctis instead of herself, both out of duty and love.

it was heart-aching to watch, however, as ravus and ignis had discovered them right when luna’s final breath had been given to noctis. they had witnessed the sight of an aging corpse right before their eyes -- luna’s body going from flush to ghostly pale as the golden light of her breath fades. haunting still was the fact that her eyes had remained open -- revealing the fade from blue to grey. it was as if hours had passed within that single second; but it was that comparison of lunafreya’s cold, dead body besides noctis, still flush with life, that would anger ravus the most...

tldr; luna was well aware that her death was inevitable and the more she communed with the gods, the weaker she grew, and consequently the realization that her duty would be the death of her. despite this, luna continuously choses the fulfillment of her duty over her own life, actively choosing to sacrifice her final strength and breath to ensure noctis’ survival. (and a small reminder, just in case, that her main duty as oracle is to help noctis achieve his destiny of restoring light to the world)

[jijinoke-blog]

“What do you want to be remembered for?”

“memories are fleeting, my friend. memories matter so little to the passage of time. let’s say one person remembers, let’s say 100 remembers. they will all pass eventually. let’s say they speak to others about it, they try to pass on the memories, but they mess up, one word at a time, one generation at a time, your accomplishments are skewed by human error. at the end, i can be a hero out of legends with impossible acts... or i can be a villain of heinous deeds, neither of which match the reality.” a grim smile shows itself.

a shallow chuckle escapes those thin lips. “and that’s if they even deem one’s life worthy of remembrance.”

“whatever i want people to remember me by doesn’t matter with time. whatever i say, whatever i want doesn’t matter, no? they will remember what they want to remember. they will say and pass down what they want to pass down.” 

“and why would my legacy matter when i’m dead, gone from this mortal realm?” he asks. laughing, he adds, “ah, i went on a tangent, hadn’t i?”

“i don’t care to be remembered, my friend, i have no legacy i wish to pass on. people can remember what they wish about me, they can pass on their stories. i will simply live the way i wish.”

[preteening]

Nothing gives me a really satisfying panic attack the way my crippling fear of mortality does :---)))

[whsprings]

having friends with severe eating disorders is checking the comments on their last social media post (it was years ago) and just hoping that you won't see a bunch of goodbye messages

[whsprings]

god it is so fucking horrible to not know if someone you care for is alive or dead. and while I know she is likely safe due to being in treatment you never know, especially when it's days or weeks between hearing anything from her.

[whsprings]

What kind of trophy do you get for being good at your ED anyway?

you get to be the hottest bitch in the morgue :)

[whsprings]

I WISH I HAD A SCALE I AM SCREAMING AND CRYING FOR TEN THOUSAND YEARS anyway. weather was nice today.

[whsprings]

just found out that my friend who's been in treatment since March of last year is "taking a treatment break" and my hands are shaking im so scared for her. like I didn't tell her that but like. this shit kills people.

[whsprings]

I miss my therapist :/ I emailed her yesterday when I found out about the girl I knew and she did respond but she's not one to say much over email. I wish I was having session this week but instead I am never having session with her ever again. because I fucked it all up. I have a stupid project to finish for my stupid psych class and all I can think about is that girl and how her ed shouldn't have been able to take her. also how I am probably going to fail this class because even if I get 100% the highest grade I can get is a 74. a C is a 72.5. I am not sure if a C- is passing or not, I tried looking it up but didn't get a clear answer. literally fuck this class. I don't want to do it. at all. I want to be sad.

[whsprings]

was just informed that the woman who cut my hair for years back home also died. she was 49. wtf is happening

[whsprings]

read her last blog post. it was about trying again. and then she didn't make it. I hadn't spoken to her in years, we weren't particularly close, and now she's gone and I'm crying. it just hits way too close to home.