#CARNIE REIGN

[kakusboyfriend]

My issue is that I can anthropomorphize anything. The parasitic monster who's nowhere near human and would definitely kill me for sustenance because it's an animal and I'm meat? No it's fine, it's my bestest friend in the world ^_^

[achillean-knight]

Wild ass theory, apologies if someone's suggested this before GWAH

I'm not gonna use it in my AU, BC idfk what I'd even do with this, but just a silly little theory that popped up in my head while watching Marks playthrough of HW2.

If we're heading in a circus direction- or atleast the fall fest (if I'm remembering correctly) as the potential teased "early timeline" game that Steelwool wants to do, with the carnival styled minigames in HW2 (mostly from memory the merry-go-round and Fazerblast) potentially referencing the 1970's Fall Fest, could the reason Carnie is a recolour be because he was the original animatronic, and Henry snagged him up again later down the line, tinkered with him and repainted him to be Lefty?

If Henry was work partners with William and designed the animatronics for Fall Fest, along with the rights to Fazbear, he'd have full reign to grab his creation again and repurpose it.

It'd explain why Carnie is a recolour of Lefty, and why Lefty acts sporadically on stage in FNAF6 while performing. Both BC he's got the puppet in him, but also because he wasn't created to preform. (Also both Carnie and Lefty have the same pose in hw2)

Idk just a random thought that hit me lmao

[fantasies-fairytales-n-fics]

Thranduil and Josie Pt. 169- Gypsy Origins Part 2 of 3

Summary: Hypnotized under Haldir's mind manipulation, Josselyn continues her many truths of troublesome, but relevant past.

*Chapter Warnings* language, angst, sexual content, smoking, drinking

Chapter characters: Haldir, Josselyn(Delphine), Harker, Jemma, Bellamey, Toones, Carl, Narcisse, Catherine, Julian, Caroline, Cassandra, Legolas, Tauriel, Zeddicus

Chapter word count: 7,386

Stories Stories Stories Masterlist

Josselyn was becoming very agitated in her hypnotic state after she spoke of witnessing Harker's big bad wolf persona and Haldir knew he had to tread carefully on how hard he pushed her traumatic memories out under his spell of truth, for too much stress could cause her to forget everything, even who she was. Even so, it was more important to him to keep you and Leeanduil safe and that meant finding out everything she knew about Harker, Sarah and Caroline, so he held her hand to pass his calming effects through her as he asked her to slowly continue. Her pale lips quivered for a moment at his unexpected touch and as the elf's magic kicked in, she softly exhaled and began again.

"Harker...he's telling me we are packing up and leaving for the castle in Dorwinion to set up his carnival for a weekend summer solstice celebration. We should be at a base camp outside the borders come first light. I am happy I get to go but...I remember Thomas' words about this castle. About the reigning warlock lord being of both darkness and light. Was he dark like Harker? What will I do there? He does not mention Ravenna and he seems calm, considering what I did to him. The gash on his hand has healed. Is he still angry about that? I feel unsettled as I remember last year's solstice when he killed my father and took me and my mother as his property. I wish I would have stuck that silver dagger in his heart. He certainly does not like silver.

All but two small trailers are being loaded and locked up. Two guards and two servants remain to guard the children in the underground caverns. We are moving now. I am chained in his trailer and forced to listen to him defile my mother all night...but strangely, she sounds like she is enjoying it. I am covering my ears. I am helpless. I am scared he will take me too, but he does not.

It is a blue sky morning. We are arriving at a clearing. I can see the towers of a castle peaking over the trees through the blacked out windows that can only be seen out of.

Harker's men are heading out on the morning hunt for food while his carnies set up the camp. Three of them are summoned and are coming inside. They scare me. My mother once called them freaks. That word is not permitted by Harker. He says if you laugh at them, you laugh at him. She doesn't call them that anymore.

Harker is bringing me out to the living quarters and is holding me close against him with a smile. Something is different about him. He...he's nicer to me and is telling them of the day's plans. He is looking at them from left to right as he speaks their names.

Mr. Bellamey, Mr. Toones, Mr. Carl. I'm sure you remember young Josselyn here?

They are silent and staring at me. They're not smiling. They don't like me. I think they are all jealous of me. Especially Carl. I..I think he is really a woman. He has breasts.

She will be assisting with the evening's celebration and you all will show her the ropes.

Carl is speaking. He's pouty and not happy.

That makes me mad. She is not our family. She's a plain Jane little girl.

Harker sits down and smiles.

Oh but she is family now and she is far from ordinary. She is a magical being in the making like you all were and soon to be a witch like me and she will be welcomed by you just as I have welcomed her.

I...I am shaking. My knees buckle and I drop on them. I tell him I don't understand.

You will my child, all in due time. You have taken in Ravenna's power. It is your to keep.

M...M..Master...keep? I...I did not, do not want it. It was an accident. I didn't know what I was doing. I had no control over it. I am old enough to understand that nothing from Ravenna is given freely. She was so angry. She wanted me dead.

He is leaning forward and placing his hand on my shoulder.

Dear one. You are safe now. She is not going to hurt you. She and I have come to an understanding about what happened.

I am crying.

I..I don't want to be like her...like you. You killed my father. You kill children. You gave me to Ravenna. I would be dead right now if I were younger and why are you being so nice? I..I hurt you. I cut you with that dagger. This...this makes no sense.

It does not need to make sense. You will do as you are told. You are one of us now. It cannot be reversed. Now...the guards will be coming back with a big fat juicy elk to feast on. Oh how I do love the flesh of an elk. My boys here will show you how to prepare one and when we are all finished, we will head to the castle to set up the funfair that you will be a part of.

Y..y..y..you want...ME to..to...I...I can't! It's an animal....I feel sick.

He's leaning forward again. There is a brown leather string wrapped around his hand and it has a white crystal hanging from it. He's holding it up and speaking words I do not understand. I can't free my eyes. It is forcing me to do as he is commanding. I...I don't want to do it!!!"

Haldir had to momentarily stop her. He was disgusted. Somewhat at himself, for he was doing the same thing to her by forcing her to do what she did not want to do, but more so over the fact that he knew this verbosely needed story was only going to get worse and that Josselyn would be very resentful of him when it was over.

"You do not have to do it. I need you to move forward to the arrival at the castle. Continue from there."

"I am walking with Harker and my mother on the biggest lawn I have ever seen. It is on the bay of the black sea. I feel awkward and nervous. Harker gave me a beautiful red dress to wear. My mother is wearing her usual gypsy attire but she...is very different. She does not seem fearful anymore, but proud to be at Harker's side.

I see people, children, games and tents of many colors everywhere. There are boat rides on the inlet river. I smell such delicious food. I hear music, laughter and a....a tiger's roar I think?? I see it. There's an awful woman poking him with a stick through the bars of his cage. She's teaching a small child to do it!!! I cannot watch. A man reprimands her and scoops up the blonde boy. I cannot see the man's face. He carries a sword on his hip. I hear him. He's stern but calm to not scare the child. He tells her that is not something to teach a child, let alone her 3 year old son, for it is dangerous and idiotic, nor should she ever do it to an animal. He says she should know better and she is heartless and cruel. He hands the child to a woman servant and tells her to take Francis to see the horses. He leaves and is heading this way. She call his name, Stephane, and stops him. They argue. I can now see his face.

He's so beautiful. He dresses nothing like Harker except for the leather. He is kingly and ageless. The woman leaves and he's now coming to greet us. There's an aroma of peppermint. I...feel warm and giddy...my...my stomach feels strange when he speaks. Like butterflies are in it. I don't know why. His eyes. They are so blue.

Ahhh...Harker. You have arrived. And who are these two gorgeous creatures on your arm?

He is ogling my mother. All men do. She is beautiful and her attire is and always was very revealing of her breasts and stomach.

Lord Narcisse. What a glorious day yes? To have such eye candy at my side. This is Josselyn and Jemma. They will be assisting in tonight's festivities and Jemma, my newly acquired wife, will entertain us in the after dark jamboree. Jemma. Give Stephane a glimpse of your...talents.

Wife?? I feel sick. My heart is racing and I am speechless as she lifts her skirt and happily flaunts her body to Narcisse in front of everyone. What has Harker done to her?? I see a diamond ring on her finger. It is not the one my father gave her.

My my. Well now Harker. Eye candy indeed. I must say am very impressed with your choice of a bride and I am highly looking forward to some carousing this night in celebration of your union, although I can see I am going to receive an earful over this delightful display.

Narcisse is looking over at Catherine. She is glaring at him. She picks up a stick and storms off.

Harker is greatly amused.

Trouble in paradise with the ever so annoying Catherine?

Far from paradise and annoying to say the least. Wretched unbearable woman seems more fitting.

The two men are laughing.

Narcisse. I notice you have more security than you normally do at the funfairs. Has something happened for such a need that I need to be aware of for the safety of my own people?

I...well. I do not want to alarm anyone, but there have been reports relayed to me of children going missing in close proximity of here and with the many children I house here, one can never be too careful.

Ahhh, yes. I see. Such a shame. Who would do such a thing?

The warlock lord, he does not seem of darkness like Thomas had told me, just unhappy which does not make him evil, but it could be an act like Harker's is. I... I don't like this. I despise Harker. I want to scream out loud that it's Harker! I don't think Lord Narcisse knows what he does. He would certainly never have dealings with Harker if he knew because he seems to genuinely love children.

The tiger is roaring again. Lord Narcisse is suddenly angry.

If you all will excuse me for now. I must tend to Blaze. His bellows have Catherine's name in them. Oh...before I forget. Harker, your brother is here with his also annoying woman. Jemma...Josselyn.

He bows to us and leaves. My stomach drops. Did he mean Ravenna and the evil goblin King are here?

I cannot hold my panic in any longer. I ask Harker if Ravenna is here with Jareth. He is laughing. He says no. They would never come here. He and Narcisse are enemies. He tells me he has another brother who is Lord Narcisse's good friend. I'm secretly hoping he is nice like him. Surely he must be?"

Haldir's stance greatly stiffens with the mention of Julian and Caroline, for now he felt he was much closer to learning about Lola and Sarah.

"Tell me of the brother and woman. Did you meet them this night?"

"Yes...I..I smell something sweet like...honey and a hint of lilacs? It is overpowering the scent of grilled food. I hear a woman's voice behind us. She has an accent. Irish maybe? I turn to see a very stunning woman with porcelain skin. Her hair is long and fiery red with bangs. Her attire is Celtic much like my mother's and somewhat provocative. I sense darkness in her demeanor. Mostly in her eyes with the way she is looking upon me and my mother.

Well now. Harker, what do we have here? They're a bit old for your needs.

Now Caroline, what business would that be of yours? I am surprised to even see you here with my brother since Stephane is not your favorite person. Where is Julian?

Where do you think? I sometimes wonder if he should have married Stephane instead with the way he's always up his arse.

She's smiling and walks up to me, touching my cheek.

My my sweet child. You're quite young and....how interesting. I sense some magic in you. Are you a good witch or a bad witch Dorothy?

Oh...I...I...am no witch ma'am. I am just a...

She is laughing and places her finger over my lips to silence me.

Oh indeed you are and a good one apparently with all the politeness, but that can always change. Do call me Caroline and you..are?

J...Josselyn.

What a pretty name. You're going to be quite powerful someday. A gypsy witch like me. I have always wanted to have a daughter like that. Harker, what do you say you give this one to me? She would make a great travel companion. I tend to get lonely when Julian does not want to go with me on my funfairs.

Why would I ever give such a prize to you?? She is no use to you, for she is not of your blood and you have nothing to offer me, for I want I want, you will not give.

And what use is she to you? You have another new toy I see, so you have no need for her...OR for my body. Let me have the girl or I could always let it slip to Julian and Stephane about your dirty little secret. If they were to know, they will surely kill you. Do you think I do not know of your dealings with Ravenna? Nothing gets past my sixth sense. It is your way of making it up to Jareth for what you did to him. I'll never understand what Jareth sees in that wretched cheating witch. I mean, she slept with Jasper, who is his FATHER, your father and Julian's father and instead of ridding of her, he rids of him and all his men and at the approval of your own mother! One twisted little Brady Bunch indeed.

Harker is laughing and I am holding back my tears.

And YOU, Caroline, of all people are not twisted with your blackmail and your willingness to keep such a secret just to get what you want? And what would you do if Julian were to be unfaithful to you sweet Caroline? We both know you would not be so sweet then.

Jules would never be that stupid and he happens to love me, something you know nothing of.

Because it is forbidden by our mother after our father's infidelity which is why she is quite displeased with Julian's love of you and then there's the little fact that he stole Ashmole from her. Oh yes, and let us not forget that he is the good son, the 7th son that was supposed to be the darkest and most powerful of us all. And he is rather stupid yes, for trying to convert Jareth to the light and for resurrecting him using that book. Look where that got him. Jareth has become the most powerful and now more wicked than ever. Now, enough talk of things we have already known for some time. As far as the girl, she is what one might refer to as a plea bargain. Oh, and I believe I've already mentioned...she...is...mine.

Is that so? Hmmm. I thought I smelled Ravenna all over this child. Somehow she has taken some of her magic, which cannot be undone and now she wants something in return for it. Am I getting warm about this plea bargain?? Do tell. It would seem though, that you really should make one with me and do it quickly. Julian is just over there and he has seen us.

Caroline is waving to a man in the far distance who is perched upon a swing set, talking and laughing with children. Harker is nervous and clutches his crystal.

I will not give her to you. I can only allow her to go with you, BUT, when the time comes, I will reclaim her and what she owes. Will that suffice for your silence?

As frightened as I am, I am also relieved. Anything is better than remaining with Harker and this woman seems nice, even in her conniving ways and I was right about Julian. Harker confirmed he was of light...but...I..I do not want to leave my mother. I am trying not to cry as I tell them so, but I fail.

But I...I...my mother...Mama, I..I don't want to leave you alone or even at all.

She is laughing. She does not even seem to care. She is cruel like Harker.

Ew. Do not call me that! Children should be seen and not heard, remember? And I will not be alone. I have my new love Harker to keep me company in every way. You will only put a damper on our fun with your whining.

Caroline steps beside me and holds my hand. I..I smell chamomile, like sweet apples laced with red clover flowers. I hear a man's angelic voice behind us, a British accent.

Do not listen dear child. A mother does not always know best.

His hair is long, golden and tied back. His attire is all black and made of satin. His eyes are kind and match the blue of the sky and they are locked into my mothers. He is clearly displeased with her.

Hello Harker. I wish I could say it is a pleasure. This?... is my new sister-in-law that I knew nothing of? Howww promiscuous....and fitting of your lewd and lascivious taste.

Now Jules. Are you playing pot and kettle? Your choice in women seems quite indistinguishable from what I can see. How about we play a different game instead? Jemma, will you do the honors for my insolent brother? Heads, I take your wife and mine to bed this night as you watch. Tails, you do and I watch.

She is doing it again. Revealing herself. She pulls down her vest and pulls a silver coin out of her bra, then waves it around at him in a teasing manner.

Caroline is fuming. She swipes it from her hand, calls her a gypsy whore and throws it at her chest. My mother laughs and goes back to Harker's side. Julian picks up the coin and looks at it. He is amused.

A two headed coin. Never trust a warlock that owns a pair of magic money bosoms. Cheating will still never give you access to my wife, as if anything ever would. You wouldn't want to end up like Jareth did, would you? For the book is lost to bring you back. And Jemma darling, your gilet is rather small. Borrowing your daughter's attire?

Harker is smirking but I can see he is intimidated. Julian surely seems very powerful like Harker described. He is so confident and far from subtle. He is making my stomach flutter, even more so than Lord Narcisse does.

Judging by your silence, it would seem we have an understanding and the situation with the girl is now resolved. Welcome young Josselyn. You will be a great aid in our gallivanting travels. Caroline can use the extra hand with her trinket trades and sales and you will blend in well, as it seems you are already accustomed to the gypsy ways. She can teach you many things that you will need to learn with your newfound magic.

H..how did...you know my name?

I know many things young one, if they are not hidden from my... sight. Harker, just why is it that you are even in possession of these two ladies? They are highly out of your league of extraordinary gentlemen, if that is what one would even call them as they are far from gentle. Bellamey is a mime dressed as a clown and rips chickens heads off with his mouth to drink their blood. Toones is a back alley card shark that has been banned from all the gambling establishments, for under his attire, he conceals a sickly third arm and small hand protruding from his chest that he cheats with. Carl is not even a man but has tits and a cunt under the hat, suit, tie and 80's blue eyeshadow. The list of freaks is too long to continue. A world of wonders indeed or maybe a clockwork orange would be more suffice? It is understandable as to why Stephane saves your shows for the late night phobophile folk like yourself. It is certainly no place for a young girl to be shaped by.

Ahh Jules, that's quite the painted portrait. Always the frank farceur that loves to mock me and my family, which is the only F word they are to be called. If you truly must know, it is exactly as you have just said. I'm simply growing bored of repetition and would like to bring something extra to my funfairs. A horse of a different color per se. Some gypsy crafts, magic performances and readings would highly impress my regulars and even knew attendees. But, I suppose I can make do with just the one, beings she is more... experienced. I can see we are done here. Enjoy your time away Josselyn, for time is short.

Harker and my mother are walking away. I am sobbing and calling to her but she won't even look back at me. I try to run to her but Julian pulls me in his arms and cradles me.

Hush now child. It is for the best that you come with us. Caroline, dear, it is time to go. You have some explaining to do once we depart.

They are saying their goodbyes to Lord Narcisse. He is confused as to why they are leaving so soon and... with me. He apologizes for being so distracted by Catherine and tries to persuade them to stay longer. Julian is telling him the same he said to me, that it is for the best if they go now and to keep his eye on Harker. Narcisse assures him that he always does and he will see him soon.

Julian is helping his people pack up the wagons and trailers. Caroline quietly tells me that she and I are the only ones who know the truth and it must stay that way because of the deal she made with Harker or he will come and take me back if his dealings with Ravenna are exposed.

Night has fallen and I am not sure where we are but I know it is far away from Dorwinion. I have cried over my mother the entire ride in the small bedroom I was given. The trailer stops and the door opens and closes. I..I hear Julian and Caroline arguing outside, but their voices are too soft to make out what they are saying. I look out the window with one eye. I see Julian. His back is to me. He is relieving himself by a tree. Caroline is drinking and smoking something. She's pacing. I can hear them better now. He is angry and wants to know what she is hiding from him.

Tell me Carrie darling, why do I smell the wicked Ravenna on that child?? Did you think I would not notice such a stench? Did you also think I would buy Harker's farce of a story? He has clearly conditioned Jemma into a jezebel, for Josselyn would not be so upset to leave her if her mother was evil and had never cared about her. What are you all hiding from me? What say you woman??

Oh Julian darling. I am hiding nothing. I could smell her too so I asked. I know nothing more than you except that Harker and Ravenna have some arrangement that he would not disclose. I was worried for the girl so I simply asked him to let us take her since she is a child.

And my wicked brother simply just let you take her? What kind of fool do you take me for? Harker does not just give away what he believes to be his. Now tell me the truth woman!

Now Caroline is angry. She glares and swears at him.

This is bullshit. Why can you not ever let anything go Julian? We have the girl and she is safe!

She walks away from him but he grabs her arm and yanks her against him.

Because when Harker is involved, it is never good, which you already know that and now you have involved us in his dirty dealings. Now tell me!

If I tell you, can I have some of this?

She is grabbing between his legs. I...I cannot watch...I should not watch...but I cannot stop myself. I am too curious.

Tell me and I will fuck you till dawn.

He is placing his hand over hers and helping her massage him.

Mmmm. Well, all I know is that the child has somehow stolen some of Ravenna's magic and she wants something back for it. A child...a child of her own. Jareth refuses to give her one after what she did with Jasper. Soooo...whenever Josselyn has a child, Harker is to give it to her. He did not tell me this. My intuition just knows it.

My chest is tightening. I cannot breathe. Never. Never will I have a child! I will not let a part of me die for that witch's wrinkles!

My thoughts are distracted by more of their words. Julian is telling Caroline she would be happier if she had a child of her own and he does not understand why she has not become pregnant with all of their love making. She tells him they just need to keep trying and to take her now. She says the summer solstice holds magic in it's long night and it may help because she feels she is ...ovulating? I do not know what that means.

He spins her around and lifts her dress. He pulls his pants down. My eyes!! I..I have never seen that part of a man before! His hips jerk against her and she cries out in...."

Haldir swiftly reroutes her story, for it was making him extremely uncomfortable considering Josselyn's memories were that of a 14 year old girl, not to mention, it brought back horrible memories for himself of what Caroline did to him at Lestat's.

"I would like you to end this memory. Continue your future travels with Julian and Caroline."

"It has been 3 years and trouble free. I am 17 now, almost 18 and I am happy. Caroline and Julian are good to me. Caroline has taught me so much. I have learned about tarot cards like my mother used to do. We make lots of crafts and jewelry out of crystals and sell them at our funfairs. I must have been to every corner of middle earth but we stayed far away Ravenna's realm. We have not seen her, Harker or my mother since the day we left Dorwinion. I miss her.

It is the summer solstice again. I'm excited because Julian says there will be a solar eclipse. I walk out of my bedroom when I notice the trailer stopping. I see Julian go outside but Caroline is sitting in the dark at the table, meditating with a crystal in each hand. She looks sad and anxious. I sit with her and ask her where we are. She tells me we are near Lake Town and will be having a camp party and that I should go get ready. She says I am plenty old enough now. The same age she was when we met. I ask her what is wrong. She says it's nothing I would understand and that she just wants to get drunk and forget everything for the night. I leave her alone and do as she asked me.

The forest party goes on late into the night. There's music and many inebriated people, all dancing around, including Julian and Caroline.

I'm sitting by myself around the fire, sipping Dorwinion wine. It is sweet and very strong. My hearing is strangely sensitive and keen. Even with all the noise, I can still hear close by conversations. I'm watching Caroline and Julian dance together. Sometimes I wish I was her. I wish I could dance with him like I have in my dreams.

People are coming to sit by the fire. They are very intoxicated and telling stories. Something about a formidable King of the Woodland realm and Silvan elves. An Elvenking they call him that rules Mirkwood not far from here. He carries twin swords and rides a great elk. I remember Thomas telling me of him. The way they speak of him scares me. I feel the hair on my neck raise when they say his name. King Thranduil. They see I am afraid and laugh at me. Julian is not pleased with them and intervenes. He explains and assures me that this King will be of no threat to us as long as we do not cross his borders. I feel better. Now he...he is asking me to dance!! My stomach flutters intensely. I tell him I would be honored, then smile and take his hand.

I feel drunk against his body but it is not from the wine. I am shaking.

Child, why do you tremble?

It upsets me that he still calls me a child.

I...I am not a child anymore. I am a woman now and I have a name. You were married to Caroline when she was my age.

He is laughing and smiling. My mistake. Old habit I suppose. Forgive me. Of course you are a woman...Josselyn.

I apologize for being rude. I ask him where Caroline is. He says she is entertaining with her tarot cards. We finish the dance and he sits with me by the fire. We talk and laugh for a very long time. He tells me he has a surprise for me when we leave tomorrow. He laughs and says he must go now and make sure Caroline has not fallen down a hole somewhere. He says she does not handle the liquid spirits very well. He strokes my cheek and leaves. I am alone again and bored. I go to watch the eclipse. Caroline said we have the power to look at it.

Some time has passed and so has the eclipse. I need to pee. I'm walking through the forest. I hear moaning. I see Julian and Caroline kissing against a tree. I hide so they do not think I am spying on them. I can hear them. He asks her why she changed her dress. She says she spilled wine all over herself. They are quiet. I peek around the tree and...they are...they are having sex. I cannot watch. I sneak away. It starts to rain really hard. I am happy so no one will see my tears. I wish it was me with Julian. I...I love him.

I run into the trailer and...I cannot believe my eyes!! I see Caroline!! She's smoking, drunk and...and wearing the dress she wore earlier, the one she just told Julian only minutes ago that she spilled wine on??

Joss? What's wrong dear? You look like you've seen a ghost.

I...I don't under...how...how did you get here so fast and...your dress...you were just wearing a different one because you told Julian you spilled wine on this one.

What ever do you mean? I have been wearing this dress all night and I have not seen Julian in awhile, so I have been in here waiting for him since I knew it was going to rain. I can always sense it.

But I...I just saw you with him...in the forest. I..I swear I did not mean to see. I..I just needed to go to the bathroom and...

See...what??? How much wine have you had?

You..you and he were...well...you...you know...what men and women....do....in the bedroom.

She is silent and staring at me. The door opens. Julian walks in soaking wet. He is silent too and extremely stunned to see Caroline. Something is happening. They both seem to know, but I do not. Caroline is shaking and very angry. Her anger is making the trailer shake too. Julian tells her she is scaring me. It is true. I am scared. I have never seen her so enraged.

That BITCH!! Where is Cassie Julian??!!! I smell her all over you!!! How could you not know it was not me?????!!!!!! I smell of honey. She smells of cherries!!!

Julian seems disoriented and stumbles to the chaise longue.

But she did smell of honey.

You bewitched fool!!

Caroline storms out the door. I tend to Julian. I ask him what has happened. Who is Cassie? He whispers to me before he falls asleep.

One of Caroline's many sisters. Her twin.

I did not know she had any sisters, let alone a twin. She never spoke of them.

Julian is fast asleep. I caress his soft cheek. I...I kiss his supple lips and confess my love for him, then I go to look for Caroline. I am worried.

It is pouring and foggy. It is so dark, but my eyes can strangely see very well. I hear voices. Angry voices that sound like the same person. I...I see them in a clearing, but I stay hidden behind a tree. I have to blink many times, for if it were not for their clothes, I would not know which one is Caroline. They are identical.

You will pay for this Cassandra! He is MY husband!

I have already unfairly suffered by you because of your unjustified jealousy. But no more! It is your turn to suffer sister! You took from me and now I have taken from you.

Unjustified?? I am the 7th born daughter. I am the one who is supposed to have children, not you!

Oh but you are so wrong. I am the 7th born. Father told me the truth of how our places were mixed up right after mother gave birth. He figured it out recently because of my powers. I am a weaver like mother. The most powerful of witches. It is not my fault that I can conceive and you cannot! You terminated all of my pregnancies with your black magic! SIX of them! All girls! Goran left me because of you! He said an unbearing wife was useless to him! But a 7th daughter I will have and it will be by a 7th son! There is no magic that will undo it! It has been written in the eclipse of the solstice. You should know the consequences of using black magic Carrie. By the power of 3 times 3, so mote it be you baby stealing bitch!

Viktor is a liar!! YOU'RE a liar!! I should have just killed you. I will kill you now. You cannot have a child, especially Julian's child if you are dead!!!

Caroline sends a bolt of electricity at her sister. Cassandra is quick and smacks it away. She is hysterically laughing at Caroline.

Oh sister. Your power is no match for mine. You know nothing of my capabilities and quite frankly, neither did I until recently...and guess what Carrie darling? I've been practicing!

Cassandra raises her hands to the sky and she screams. It's deafening. Caroline and I both cover our ears and drop to our knees. The rain pierces down like nails. I have to now cover my head. There's lightning bolts. The wind rages and howls. It is hard to see but I can definitely see what's forming in the sky. It's a tornado!!!

I'm now clutching the tree to stay grounded as my legs are trying to be sucked into the air. Cassandra's hair and dress whips about, but she stands firm against the wind. Caroline has nothing but the earth to cling to. Lightning bolts pummel the ground around her. She's screaming. She gets up to run but the wind lifts her. She is thrown against a tree, face first. The same tree she threw Cassandra against. Cassandra begins to chant. I recognize the words. It is a nursery rhyme. The itsy bitsy spider. Any power I have is useless to fend her sister off but I must do something. I pull myself to the front of the tree where Cassandra can see me. I scream as loud as I can for her to leave Caroline alone. She hears me.

The very moment she whips her head in my direction, the storm stops. All is still and silent. Cassandra gasps and runs away when our eyes connect. I run to Caroline. She is dirty and bloody. I help her to her feet and we embrace.

She says I cannot tell Julian or anyone what I heard. She says I must help her with a future plan to take care of Cassie. Although I don't like what she did to Cassandra, I tell her I will help because I feel responsible for what happened because I told what I saw. She tells me only Cassie and Julian are to blame and that we have to leave now. The spiders will soon come from the dark forest of Mirkwood. There will be too many to fight off, even with magic.

Everyone is packed up. It is the twilight hours before sunrise. Julian is still in a deep sleep. We cannot wake him. Caroline says he'll be fine. He is high on Belladonna. She jokes he should have been given a lethal dose. I am worried for him. Caroline blames him just as she does Cassandra. I am conflicted. I love them both but I don't want her to hurt him. After her comment and with what she has done to her own sister, I believe now that she would.

Caroline and I are heading to the trailer. I hear something and stop. A rustling sound in the forest. In the distance, I hear a woman singing. Caroline hears it too. It's that nursery rhyme again.

The itsy bitsy spider crawled up the water spout. Down came the rain and washed the spider out. Out came the sun and dried up all the rain and the itsy bitsy spider went up the spout again.

Caroline shouts for everyone to go now!!

We don't make it inside. At least a dozen spiders as big as our trailers emerge from the trees. They barricade the path and surround us. I hide with Caroline under the trailer. The armed drivers protect the horses while the rest of our men fight to protect us and their own. Some of them are warlocks with powers. They have set some on fire.

The spiders become distracted. Someone...or something is here. What is that in the trees???!! They are attacking the spiders with bows and swords. I soon realize they are elves. 4 of them, but two stand out to me. A male with long light hair, a female with red. I have never seen one before. They are not much different from us, just their attire and ears. They move with such grace and agility. The light haired one is swinging down a spider's own line of silk. He lands on the spider and slides down a hill on top of it as if it were a sled. He pulls a knife from behind his back and kills it, then he has his bow ready to kill another before they even stop sliding.

In merely minutes, all the remaining spiders are dead. Two of the elves are speaking with our men. It does not appear any are injured. The other two of light and red hair are speaking to one another. I cannot understand their language.

Caroline crawls out to speak with them. I am still too scared and stay beneath the trailer. She seems to know who they are. She calls the redhead Tauriel and the blonde one Prince Legolas. Caroline thanks them and asks why they have come. She swears to them that we had not crossed their borders. Legolas speaks to her in English. His voice is deep. He tells her they were alerted by the unnatural storm. They had also heard the summoning of the spiders. It is too close to their borders and the spiders are already a nuisance to their realm. Caroline thanks them again for their help and mentions how his notorious father would not have. Legolas clarifies that he is not his father but that we must go now, for his father will not be so kind to our kind. He believes us perpetually nefarious without exception and will hold us responsible for the too near invasion. He informs that more spiders will come to claim their dead. He says they will stay and rid of them.

Legolas turns to walk away. He sees me!! He raises a curious brow at me. I'm shaking like a leaf. He smells of leaves. Minty ones. His eyes are like no other color. They remind me of moonstones. I nervously smile at him. He does not smile and walks away.

We are now on our way. I ask where we are going now. Caroline says we are going to a friend's cabin. It is far North of the Grey mountains on remote land and it will be a very long journey. Weeks, maybe longer with resting nights and frequent stops for the horses to eat, drink and rest. I have never been past the Northern mountains.

I have forgotten what day it is. All I can focus on is the tension and silence between Julian and Caroline. They have not slept in the same room. Caroline...she's changing. She's bitter and cold...even to me sometimes. She drinks and smokes a lot more. I used to hear her cry herself to sleep, but not anymore. It is like she has went numb. The way she looks at Julian now makes my skin crawl. I try to remain helpful but at the same time, stay out of her way. I do not want her as an enemy.

We have arrived at. It is dark and late. it is very remote like Caroline said. All I see is open land and miles of forestry. The cabin is glowing with candlelight from every window. The other travelers head near the forest to set up their camps and we go inside the cabin. The table is full of food and drink. The fireplace is lit for something that is cooking in a large black kettle. It smells like stew. That is not all I smell. I...I smell...old spice. It...it can't be. I spin around and look at Julian. He is smiling his big beautiful smile.

I found something for you. Surprise Josselyn.

I spin back around and see my grandfather magically standing at the table. He...he looks so different. His clothes are different. He wears a robe. He is so thin. He has cut his long hair to shoulder length. he reminds me of a wizard.

Grandfather?? How...wh...where have you been for the past 3 years?

He grins at me. Where else? Looking for you my child. Welcome home.

@redeemer46

[trivialbob]

Guess which side of the Keurig carousel is Bob’s, and which is Sheila’s.

On the left a variety of flavors mingle happily like a litter of puppies. Labels are right side up, as God intended. The pods are loosely organized by color in the columns, though not so much as to broadcast a hint of OCD. There aren’t any gaps like a carny’s smile.

Utter chaos reigns on the other side. A single variety of coffee, except for one outlier which is like a pebble in a shoe. One might go cross-eyed trying to find a label that faces north. And see those empty slots! Clearly by someone who lets a phone battery get down to 10% and whose car’s low fuel light burned out long, long ago.

I wrote this as neutrally as I could, in order to not give give any hints which side belongs to who.

[the-haunted-office]

Sallow Bend

by Alan Baxter 5/10

Ehhh, this book was okay - but that’s it. Just okay.

Sallow Bend is about a small town of the same name where a strange number of deaths occurs every so often. A carnival rolls into town and people are suspicious of them; there’s a lot of tension between the locals and the carnies. One day two young girls go missing, and when they’re found there’s a third girl with them - named Hester Black - who mysteriously everybody suddenly remembers. Our Protagonists eventually wake up from Hester’s hypnotic effects on the townsfolk and seek to put an end to her reign of terror.

Now, the book had a decent storyline. Somewhat decent characters, although I found myself having a difficult time really caring about any of them. But the horror aspect? That fell completely flat for me. Sure there were some horror elements - like a mysterious murderous ghost girl with supernatural powers and some deaths - but nothing really struck me as scary. There wasn’t anything in here that was all that memorable to me. Not a bit of it got my pulse going. There was no build-up of dread, which is essential for me to really feel the horror in a horror book.

And for those who are curious - NO, it was NEVER explained why that one dude had to be naked while he attempted to destroy the ghost girl. Just- why? :|

[comecorrectorgetcorrected]

I make playlists sometimes.

Wifey said I should share them with writeups. 

So, I’m going to start with the one I made for the Mighty Nein. I decided to go hard mode and not include any Autumn Orange (no matter how awesome they are), so these are purely picked and chosen out of music I know or was already in my purview. They are short because they are pretty carefully curated, and are also designed to be shuffled, so in no particular order.

The All-Powerful Nah

-*WARNING- spoilers for Critical Role Campaign 2 below the cut!*-

The Sun - Klingande Remix Radio Edit/ Parov Stelar, Graham Candy, Klingande ~ Quite simply, Jester. (”I’m gonna tell my mama, that I’m a traveler; I’m gonna follow the sun”)

Shackleton/ Adam Young ~ This song oozes Fjord energy so much I can’t picture the man without hearing this song in my head. Atone & Bloom / Auvic, Caroline Kim ~ Caduceus, in general the punch of You Haven’t Seen Cleric Yet that he brought to the party. (”May I muse along the way?”) Blossoms / Goopsteppa ~ The first time in the Blooming Grove.

Awake / Ok Goodnight ~ Yasha, particularly post Rumblecusp.

Doomed / Reliqa ~ Beauregard, in so many ways, in so many arcs. (”I’m about to march up to the playground, show the big kids what the runt is made of”)

Murky / Saint Mesa ~ Caleb, bottom to the top.

Third Eye / Florence + The Machine ~ Look, I gotta have a little flo+. As a treat. Also, I literally cannot listen to this song without thinking of Nott/Veth singing it to Caleb, and subsequently bawling. (”I’m the same, I’m the same, I’m trying to change”)

The Grand Bizarre / Beats Antique ~ Mollymauk, oh you funky carnie you. 

Femina /  Żywiołak ~ You know how every woman in the Mighty Nein is high strength and high damage powerhouses? Yes, that.

Wonderland / Caravan Palace ~ CHAOS CREW. Particularly Jester. The swing elements just smack of a girl raised in a bordello, while the lyrics lean Beau and Veth so hard.

Gloria Regali / Tommee Profitt, Fleurie ~ It’s trailer music. It’s somber and ominous. It’s Nonagon. (”Forever may you reign”)

Selkie / Entheogenic ~ While this song is heavily sampled from the movie Song of the Sea, to me in the M9 context, it evokes Fjord’s journey to becoming an Oath of the Open Sea paladin and what that means for his growth as a person.

Space Man / Eurielle, Ryan Louder ~ S H A D O W G A S T. (”I know a place where there is only you and me and stars...”)

Sunlit Grave / Saint Mesa ~ Glory Run Road. (Jester scries on Mollymauk after finding his grave empty.)

Tuleloits / Kerli ~  Caleb casting Widogast’s Transmogrification on Veth.

Instructions for Time Travel - Recue Remix / Robot Koch, Savannah Jo Lack, Recue ~ An overall perfect overture for Caleb Widogast in general.

After the Storm / Mumford & Sons ~ Yasha, liberated from Obann but in no way at peace with her freedom, the second time since joining the Nein she’d left captivity to find tragedy where she wasn’t able to stop it... and the gentle reassurances from the remaining Nein that she was not at fault, and she deserves her freedom and chance to do better.

I FEEL THINGS A LOT AND MUSIC IS VERY FEELS. Thanks for getting this far. I hope you enjoy. I’ll gladly take suggestions for additions into consideration.

[aew-needs-to-do-better]

Hangman is a really private dude. He doesn’t seek out media and never has gone off script before that promo. Dude just wrestles on his Wednesdays and Sundays and goes home.

Compare that to Sammy Guevara who I know is a bit of an asshole, who I know is a bit compulsive, who I know prioritizes himself over others and isn’t the safest person to work with. Sammy always had personality issues with other people who have worked with him.

This is to not say that Guevara isn’t talented. He is. Sammy is an asshole. He is arrogant. And he does rub people the wrong way.

Point is that Hangman had a squeaky clean rep prior to that promo and after that promo in several companies and indies he worked for including Punk’s former ROH. The fact that he did what he did, and spoke out against Punk speaks volumes about what Punk was doing behind the scenes. For fuck’s sake, even Eddy Kingston said the same shit. If Sammy got in a fight tomorrow, that seems on track with his record and reputation.

Now compare that to Bryan Danielson. No one has any problem with Bryan. Dude was given the reigns to do what he wants and he didn’t do it by browbeating the talent around him. In fact, every company that has worked Danielson had nothing but glowing things to say about him. Every company Punk has worked with, there was always a fight or some bit of controversy. Always some bullshit. Always some fights. Before we ascribed that as Punk being rambunctious instead of cantankerous. We thought it was punk being rebellious in an industry full of fakes and carny when he was just selfish and unimaginably disagreeable.

CM Punk in early 2010s was rallying against a wrestling company that hated wrestling. Since then WWE NXT was a thing, NJPW took off, and there were plenty of alternatives before AEW became a thing. Punk wasn’t the rebel anymore. He was the bare minimum. Punk before anything was a Cornette guy. And in a company built around Kenny Omega matches and the NJPW style, this wasn’t going to fit for Punk ever. Punk was the relic. Punk was the Vince. He was the conservative. He was the old man yelling on his podcast about what the kids are doing. He was the asshole.

[tonyschiavonesearring]

I want pro wrestling to get better and WWE to be good again post-Vince, but I think all this exploding fandom is delusional. Really its pettiness against AEW fans. AEW fans were so annoying, calling every PPV a classic and cheering every mediocre match as great and AEW better than WWE.

Now WWE is doing the same. Twitter is like the same 5 accounts constantly posting, "WWE is better than ever. Attitude Era is back! We eating good" They're hyping their company up to spite the other side.

I started posting again because every wrestling podcast I check on Youtube, so I don't have to watch wrestling, is run by WWE lackies who can't be honest reviewing anything. I'm not even an AEW fan, but there's a clear bias against AEW - same as Meltzer has a pro-AEW bias.

Every wrestling podcast. "WWE is hotter than its been in decades. They're making more money than ever soooo..." These are old rightwing carnies who think good wrestling = making money. WWE makes money on TV & merch deals, not popularity. WWE used to have millions of viewers weekly. Now they get a million views on a 3 minute clip because people only care about the main event angle. WWE is not "better than ever" or making a comeback.

WWE is working fans as usual and it really annoying. Roman Reigns is not even a mainstream star. So fans look delusional claiming Cody Rhodes and LA Knight are the biggest stars in years. They aren't even Daniel Bryan or Bray Wyatt level.

[wrestlingwiththoughts]

Wrestling in 2023

A discussion group that I belong to conducts an annual poll of that year's high and low points of pro wrestling. That poll then gives out awards to recognize those highs and lows. These are the Carny Awards of 2023.

Best Male AEW Wrestler

**WINNER: Swerve Strickland: 48.1%** Bryan Danielson: 37% Orange Cassidy: 11% Jon Moxley: 3.7% "Hangman" Adam Page: 0% Maxwell Jacob Friedman: 0%

It was Swerve's year off of the Texas Deathmatch he had with Hangman at Full Gear, his showing in the Continental Classic, the incredible video of his and AR Fox's attack on Nick Wayne in his garage gym, and burying Keith Lee for refusing to do his job. I personally think Swerve's character is a bit all over the place, swerving from cartoonish villainy to getting cheers from the crowd. Danielson, supposedly in his last full active year in wrestling, made it one to remember with matches against Rush, MJF, Ricky Starks, Kazuchika Okada, Zack Sabre Jr., Eddie Kingston, and many more. Orange Cassidy held up AEW as best as he could with his International title reign, while Moxley remained the steady headliner. 

Best Male WWE Superstar

**WINNER: Gunther: 74.1%** Sami Zayn: 11.1% Seth Freakin Rollins: 7.4% Brock Lesnar: 3.7% Roman Reigns: 3.7% Cody Rhodes: 0%

Gunther runs away with the category this year. He consistently delivers in the ring, and hopefully bigger things are in store for the Intercontinental Champion. Sami Zayn continued to ride the momentum from last year, but he’s receded into the background. Seth Freakin Rollins tries his best with the fake world title belt that is held hostage by Roman Reigns. Brock Lesnar did his thing with Cody earlier in the year. LOL Cody Rhodes.

Best Other Male Wrestler

**WINNER: Will Ospreay: 55.6%** Mistico: 14.8% Rocky Romero: 11.1% Alex Shelley: 7.4% Sanada: 7.4% Krule: 3.7%

Billy Sex Pig takes the category in his last year before he moves over to the AEW category for 2024. Given that he probably has the best match of 2023 in whatever company he worked in (NOAH, Impact, RevPro, 1PW, OTT, NJPW, and AEW), it’s well deserved. Mistico’s and Rocky Romero’s strong showings here reflect CMLL’s very good year. Alex Shelley was a surprisingly good main eventer for Impact, while Sanada tried his best with his buddies in NJPW. I’m glad that the Krule nominator got to vote for Krule. 

Best Female AEW Wrestler

**WINNER: Hikaru Shida: 32.1%** “Timeless” Toni Storm: 25% Julia Hart: 21.4% Kris Statlander: 17.9% Emi Sakura: 3.6%

Hikaru Shida told the voters that anyone else winning the category wouldn’t work for her, brother. Going from the best wrestler in the Outcasts to working with Juice Robinson in NJPW Strong shows to embracing the Timeless Toni gimmick meant that Toni Storm’s 2023 was a land of contrasts. Love it or hate it, you’ll have to accept that Julia Hart is one of the bright spots of AEW’s women’s division along with Kris Statlander, who was the TBS Champion for most of the year. Emi Sakura was denied Queen and London, but she got some votes from this crowd. 

Best Female WWE Superstar

**WINNER: Rhea Ripley: 51.9%** Iyo Sky: 18.5% Tiffany Stratton: 14.8% Becky Lynch: 7.4% Asuka: 3.7% Bianca Belair: 3.7%

People love Mami, as demonstrated by Rhea Ripley’s decisive win in this category. Iyo Sky won the Money in the Bank briefcase, the women’s title, and jumped off of a cage in a trash can this year, but she couldn’t win this category. Tiffany Stratton is the brightest prospect in NXT. Lynch, Asuka, and Belair all did various things in 2023. 

Best Other Female Wrestler

**TIE: Athena and Giulia: 33.3%** Chihiro Hashimoto: 14.8% Tam Nakano: 11.1% Stephanie Vaquer: 7.4% Mercedes Mone: 0%

Putting Athena in this category was meant to reflect the fact that she was stuck unseen on ROH for most of the year except for her PPV matches against Willow Nightingale and Billie Starkz. Nonetheless, she was able to tie Giulia, the brightest star of Stardom. Chihiro Hashimoto continues to toil in relative obscurity in the joshi world, while 2023 was not Tam Time even though she beat Giulia at All-Star Queendom this year. Stephanie Vaquer is picking up titles and attention in CMLL. Mercedes Mone used up her health Flexible Spending Account this year due to injuries. 

Best Tag Team

**TIE: The Astronauts (Fuminori Abe and Takuya Nomura), FTR (Cash Wheeler and Dax Harwood), Judgment Day (Finn Balor and Damien Priest), and The Gunns (Austin and Colten Gunn): 21.4%** M3K (Susumu Mochizuki and Yasushi Kanda): 10.7% ABC (Chris Bey and Ace Austin): 3.6%

One of the nominations lamented that it hasn’t been a great year for tag team wrestling, and a four-way tie for best tag team is a great indicator for that. The Astronauts are the best tag team in Japan outside of Dragongate, while Judgment Day is probably the best tag team in WWE.. The Gunns and FTR vie for that claim in AEW. M3K held the Twin Gates scene steady for most of 2023 in Dragongate, while ABC proved that the Bullet Club still had some life in them in Impact.

The "Hot Take" Most Overrated Wrestler of the Year

**WINNER: CM Punk: 37.9%** Maxwell Jacob Friedman: 27.6% Skye Blue: 20.7% Jey Uso: 6.9% Roman Reigns: 6.9% Carmelo Hayes: 0%

One Bill Phil’s controversial 2023 ends with the “Hot Take” Carny Award. MJF got the ball and all the rope he could hang himself with in 2023, and that ended disastrously for him (lost the title and now out injured). Skye Blue, for some reason, worked more matches in AEW than any other wrestler except for Orange Cassidy, whose gimmick this year was that all of his title defenses were wearing him down. Jey Uso couldn’t go to Canada for Elimination Chamber because of his DUIs, but he was able to wrestle one of Roman Reigns’s few singles matches in 2023. Carmelo Hayes is fine.

The "Drizzling Shits" Award for Worst On-Screen Performer

**TIE: Wardlow and Saraya: 22.2%** Adam Cole: 18.5% “Timeless” Toni Storm: 14.8% Skye Blue: 11.1% Maxwell Jacob Friedman: 11.1%

Wardlow seems like a shell of himself, and Saraya is one of the worst active wrestlers in a major company in 2023. Adam Cole is annoying during promos and boring in matches. Storm is wrestling to the Timeless Toni gimmick, which means that both her in-ring work and promos are now bad. Skye Blue’s persistent presence is a testament that thirst always wins, while MJF’s ideas and philosophy about what makes good professional wrestling were bad even though he had a great year in the ring.

Most Improved Wrestler

**TIE: The Gunns (Austin and Colten Gunn) and Julia Hart: 27.6%** Dominik Mysterio: 20.7% Shota Umino: 13.8% Yota Tsuji: 10.3% Chris Hero: 0%

The Gunns are now a respectable tag team, while Julia Hart is one of the bright spots in the AEW women’s roster. Dominik Mysterio benefits from WWE’s production team’s ability to make canned heat sound real. Two of the Reiwa Three Musketeers, Shota Umino and Yota Tsuji, impressed voters. Chris Hero came out of retirement to wrestle in 2023, so that’s an improvement over not wrestling in 2022.

The "Jim Ross" Award for Please Retire

**WINNER: Jim Ross: 27.6%** Tommy Dreamer: 20.7% Ric Flair: 20.7% Bully Ray: 13.8% Kevin Kelly: 13.8% Matt Hardy: 3.4%

Jim Ross wins his eponymous category this year, but Ric Flair and Tommy Dreamer aren’t far behind at all. Bully Ray somehow main evented in Impact this year, while Kevin Kelly was the Q-pilled voice of AEW Collision before he was demoted and pushed aside by Tony Schiavone. Matt Hardy is somehow still wrestling in 2023; judging by how Ric Flair, Tommy Dreamer, and Bully Ray are still on the list, one can assume that Hardy will still be here in years to come.

The "Tony Khan Forgets I Exist" Award for Most Underutilized Performer

**WINNER: Konosuke Takeshita: 34.5%** Willow Nightingale: 31% Pac: 17.2% Akira Tozawa: 6.9% Rush: 6.9% AR Fox: 3.4%

The fact that this category is dominated by AEW wrestlers is an indictment on who gets air time on Dynamite, Collision, and Rampage. Remember when Takeshita beat Kenny Omega in a singles match on a PPV? Remember when Nightingale had a great match with Athena? Remember Pac? Tozawa makes the best of his morsels in WWE, while Rush might have learned that the best way is to make no waves at work. AR Fox reportedly got on the company’s bad side over his passport issue prior to All Out, and he’s still in the dog house.

The "King Kong Bundy WrestleMania 2 to 3" Award for Biggest Fall from Grace

**WINNER: CM Punk: 34.5%** Wardlow: 24.1% Maxwell Jacob Friedman: 17.2% ROH: 17.2% Tom Lawlor: 6.9% Drew McIntyre: 0%

CM Punk returned from injury on a show that he was allowed to run, tried to start a feud with MJF, tried to get the Young Bucks to agree to an on-air feud with him, fought Jack Perry backstage at All Out, got fired from AEW, and slunk back to WWE because he had nowhere else to go to make the kind of salary that he wanted. Wardlow cooled off even before his injury, and the reaction to his return from injury has been anemic; using the same job matches that he had at the start of his last run doesn’t help. MJF’s flavor of ice cream turned out to taste like garbage waiting for collection on a summer day. ROH went from hot matches between FTR and the Briscoes to a cold, empty house at Final Battle 2023. Tom Lawlor has had the worst luck with matches in AEW and ROH. Drew McIntyre is fine.

Best Gimmick

**WINNER: Christian Cage: 71.4%** Swerve Strickland: 14.3% “Dirty” Dominik Mysterio: 7.1% Julia Hart, spooky witch: 3.6% CM Punk being insufferable: 3.6% Just 5 Guys: 0%

The Patriarchy is alive and well according to the Carny Award voters. Christian Cage was a consistent highlight for AEW in 2023, above Swerve Strickland, who came on strong with much help from Prince Nana and his dance. Dirty Dom is around, trying to pretend to be sleazy. Julia Hart is the de facto leader of the House of Black. I don’t think CM Punk being insufferable is a gimmick; that might just be how he is. LOL Just 5 Guys.

The "Bray Wyatt Is Sister Abigail" Award for Worst Gimmick

**WINNER: The Devil: 38.5%** “Timeless” Toni Storm: 23.1% The Brochachos: 19.2% Danhausen in general, specifically on X formerly known as Twitter: 7.7% The Acclaimed: 3.8% Skye Blue is now Spooky Skye Black: 3.8% “Neck Strong” Roderick Strong: 3.8%

MJF’s vision for professional wrestling dominated this category, with a combined 65.3% between The Devil, the Brochachos, “Neck Strong” Roderick Strong, and the Acclaimed, who were adjacent to MJF’s vision and still awful on their own. 60-years old Billy Gunn is the hardest pushed aspect of the Acclaimed, and the team’s gimmick needs to evolve. Evolving can go wrong, however, as seen in “Timeless” Toni Storm and spooky Skye Blue. Danhausen is an annoying presence in general, but he’s especially bad on X.

Geek of the Year

**WINNER: Kaito Kiyomiya: 51.7%** Lexis King: 24.1% Adam Cole: 13.8% Danhausen: 6.9% Akira Tozawa: 3.4% JD McDonaugh: 0%

Poor Kaito Kiyomiya. Sacrificed to Keiji Mutoh’s vanity and unloved in NOAH, he might be better off jumping to Dragongate or AJPW permanently. Lexis King declared that he would be different than his father by ripping off another of his father’s gimmicks, and his aesthetic choices are definitely choices one could make. Danhausen is a geek, and Tozawa is treated as a geek because he’s Asian and in WWE. Even the nominator for JD McDonaugh found him unworthy of a vote in this category, which might make him the biggest geek of all.

The "Jim Johnston" Award for Best Music

**WINNER: Swerve Strickland, “Big Pressure,” by Swerve Strickland featuring Flash Garments: 42.9%** The Gunns, “Many Men,” by 50 Cent: 14.3% Julia Hart, “Harder Hart”: 14.3% Shinsuke Nakamura, “The Rising Sun,” by CFO$: 10.7% TMDK, “Young Punks,” by Mass Lines: 10.7% Jamie Hayter, “Indignation”: 7.1%

I’d assume that voters did the Prince Nana dance while they voted for Swerve’s theme music. “Many Men” should be the Gunns’ permanent entrance theme. Julia Hart’s theme fits her well, while Nakamura’s theme remains bombastic. TMDK’s theme also fits them, and we all wish it will be Hayter Time soon.

Promotion of the Year

**TIE: WWE and CMLL: 25.9%** AEW: 18.5% AJPW: 11.1% World Wonder Ring Stardom: 11.1% NJPW: 7.4%

CMLL rightfully wins the promotion of the year category; what else can you say about a company that fills Arena Mexico every Friday and is doing well in Puebla and Guadalajara. WWE managed to tie this year based on a slightly improved product after officially installing Paul Levesque into the booker’s seat. AEW had some of the best shows of the year, but other issues knocked it to third. AJPW had a rebound year in 2023. Stardom was plagued by injuries, but it’s still going strong. NJPW has seen better days. 

Best Event

**WINNER: AEW/NJPW Forbidden Door 2023: 37%** AEW All In 2023: 22.2% CMLL 90th Anniversary Show: 18.5% WWE SummerSlam: 11.1% AEW Wrestle Dream 2023: 7.4% AEW Revolution 2023: 3.7%

Even though AEW and NJPW felt like they had down years, their collaboration bore fruit in Forbidden Door 2023, highlighted by the Bryan Danielson vs. Kazuchika Okada, Kenny Omega vs. Will Ospreay, and CM Punk vs. Satoshi Kojima matches. All In 2023 at Wembley placed second despite its whimpering ending that involved Adam Cole and MJF. The CMLL 90th Anniversary Show peaked higher with the Volador Jr. vs. Angel de Oro hair vs. hair match and the Templario vs. Dragon Rojo Jr. mask vs. mask match, but I personally would have picked the Night of Champions show from September 29. Reigns vs. Uso headlined SummerSlam. Wrestle Dream gave us Zack Sabre Jr. vs. Danielson, and Revolution gave us MJF vs. Danielson and Moxley vs. Hangman in a Texas Deathmatch.

The "WWE Promotes Murderous Dictatorships" Award for Angle That Made You Ashamed To Be A Wrestling Fan

**WINNER: Somehow, Vince McMahon returned.: 42.9%** Ric Flair joins AEW: 21.4% Adam Cole and MJF’s Brochachos storyline, including the Roderick Strong parts: 14.3% NJPW Strong books Fred Rosser to kiss Toni Storm without her consent during his match against Juice Robinson: 10.7% CM Punk gets himself fired from AEW and signs with WWE: 7.1% Juice Robinson threatens to use a roll of quarters against MJF: 3.6%

Though Vince McMahon had retired in disgrace from WWE, he held controlling shares of the stock, so it wasn’t shocking when he pressed this leverage to install some cronies to the board and return to power. Tony Khan insists that AEW is getting paid to use Ric Flair, but just because you’re getting paid doesn’t mean that you have to do the thing. Remember when MJF and Adam Cole went to Outback Steakhouse and carried an inflatable crocodile around to prepare for their match against Aussie Open? NJPW Strong thought that having a gay Black man kiss a white woman against her will to distract her husband during the men’s match was a good idea. CM Punk did it again in 2023. MJF also thought it was a good idea to tap into rise in antisemitism in the US with his angle. 

Gif of the Year

**WINNER: Hikaru Shida: “That doesn’t work for me, brother.”: 51.7%** Christian Cage: “Go fuck yourself.” 27.6% Prince Nana’s dance: 13.8% The lads on the Briscoes’ chicken farm: 3.4% Jon Moxley on commentary: 3.4% CM Punk on why he’s back in WWE: 0%

Once again, Shida Hogan told the booker that she’s not doing the job. Christian Cage’s anti-dead dad gimmick became something more when he became the father that everyone deserves. Prince Nana’s dance is delightful. The sight of Jay Lethal, Satnam Singh, Sonjay Dutt, Jeff Jarrett, Mark Briscoe, and a baby working on the Briscoes’ farm was wholesome. Moxley earned many fines on commentary. Nobody cares about why Punk is back in WWE.

"What a Maneuver!" Award for Coolest Move/Dive

**WINNER: El Hijo del Vikingo’s 630 senton: 25%** Mascara Dorada’s cutter over the barricade: 17.9% Neon’s triple jump moonsault: 14.3% Brody King’s Cradle Shock: 14.3% Logan Paul and Ricochet collide in mid-air: 14.3% Mirai Maiumi’s lariat: 10.7% The Creeds’ Cannonball Dive: 3.6%

The best flips are in the world of lucha libre, but it’s cool to see a nice lariat like Mirai Maiumi’s. Brody King’s Cradle Shock looks great, and it’s still fun to see big guys like the Creeds fly.

The "I'm Marking Out, Bro" Legit Shook Moment of the Year

**WINNER: Bryan Danielson comes out to “The Final Countdown” at Forbidden Door 2023: 31%** CM Punk is back in WWE: 27.6% Cody Rhodes loses at WrestleMania, gets hit with a thrown rubber chicken intended for Roman Reigns: 20.7% Shun Skywalker betrays Diamante and causes Diamante to lose his mask: 17.2% Sanada beats Okada for the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship: 3.4% Jay White’s debut in AEW: 0%

After all this time and all the talk about how expensive it was to license the song, Tony Khan brought out the checkbook for Danielson’s entrance in his match against Okada at Forbidden Door. Punk returned to WWE after burning his AEW bridge. Cody Rhodes couldn’t #FinishTheStory, and insult was added to injury when the rubber chicken landed. The most compelling villain in professional wrestling, Shun Skywalker, stunned fans when he turned on his squadmate Diamante during the Mask Vs. Mask Steel Cage Five Way Survival match at Dragongate Kobe Pro-Wrestling Festival 2023. Sanada was able to finish the story by beating Okada for the top prize in NJPW. People continue to Breed with the Switchblade to this day.

[neo-crimson-palace]

Chihiro has made a gaming software, and he claims that he can beat anyone in any game. Celeste takes offense to that, challenging him to that duel... and she ends up losing. Now she has to pay the price... giving Chihiro full access to her body

(For my Good Friend @carny-writings Sorry it took so long)

Celeste couldn’t hide the look of displeasure on her face as the words “YOU LOSE” appeared on her side of the screen. Contrasting to the “WINNER!” prompt that was flashing on Chihiro’s side. Setting the controller down to her lap, she could only glance to the bashful programmer, who rubbed the back of his head with a laugh. 

“Looks like I win Celeste.” He said with his trademark soft tone. But if one looked closely, they could see a faint but proud smile on his face. 

“So it would seem.” She sighed; a part of her still in pure disbelief at the fact that she had lost. When she challenged Chihiro to his newly created game, she had full absolute confidence that she could win and defeat him. While she may not have looked like it. She was rather proficient in video games. While not on the level of the Ultimate Gamer. She has won her fair share of tournaments in the past. So that, along with her pride, led her recklessly challenging him to a match. 

She didn’t realize just how much Chihiro would destroy her in his own game. 

Even if he created it, she never expected it to be so one-sided. It was almost embarrassing; but now, a deal was a deal. “As promised… you are allowed to do whatever you wish with me and my body.” She said calmly. 

“R-Really? You mean it?” Chihiro uttered, still in shock that this was his prize. 

“I never go back on my word.” Was all the Gambler said; win or lose, even if she was known for being manipulative to others. She was still an honorable woman when it came to bets. That was something she took seriously. 

“U-Um, well… in that case.” He poked his fingers together. “C-Can you give me a… blowjob then?” 

Celestia had to repress an amused snort at that. Though that didn’t stop the small smile forming on her face, even if he dressed up and acted like a girl. At the end of the day, Chihiro was still a boy much like Makoto and all the rest. So of course, he would want something like this. Well, she was a woman of her word, and besides, it was merely Chihiro. What’s the worst that could happen?

*SMACK*

“…E-Eh?” 

Her red eyes shrank, filled with complete shock at the huge slab of meat that had slapped right over her face. This… this was absolutely NOT what she had been expecting when she pulled down the boy’s skirt and panties. She had expected Fujisaki to be sporting a moderate, if admittedly a slightly below average sized cock, given his build and physique. Not a monstrous pillar dangling between his legs. Looking past the surprising monolithic fuckstick, and up to the blushing Chihiro. The programmer could only bury his face in his hands; clearly flustered at Celestia’s astonished expression made from looking at his dick. 

“W-Well,” The Gambler cleared her throat. “I must say Fujisaki, I certainly wasn’t expecting you to hold such a surprising… trump card with you” 

Celestia couldn’t believe herself, her? Getting nervous? This was simply Chihiro, the same timid child who couldn’t form a sentence without stuttering or mumbling underneath his breath, what did she have to worry about. Yes, that’s right, even if he had a big cock, that didn’t necessarily mean he knew how to use it unlike a certain Naegi. She should be able to take the reigns on this no problem. 

Right? 

-X- 

*PLAP* *PLAP* *PLAP*

“OH MY GOD!!!”

Celestia howled at the top of her lungs as she was pinned down in an intense mating press by none other than the programmer Chihiro. Who was throwing his mind and body to the abyss of lust that was washing over his body. No sooner had Celestia started pleasing him with her mouth and pussy, the young femboy lost all form of self-control and just took the Ultimate Gambler within the middle of his bedroom. The sloppy wet sounds of his cock drilling deep into her cunt filled the air, accompanied by the sound of his cum stuffed balls audibly smacking against her plump asscheeks. The Goth Beauty unable to do anything more than scream and cum her brains out as her legs bounced in the air helplessly. Any form of rational thinking or comprehension quickly being diminished by the cock overwhelming her senses. 

“M-Ms. Ludenburg, I-I’m gonna…” 

Celestia’s mind was gone at that point, barely registering the boy’s cries that he was cumming. Her red eyes rolled into her skull as she felt him bury his cock and fire off a thick and creamy load of his spunk deep into her core. Filling up her womb to the brim. Her legs twitching and shaking as another powerful orgasm shot throughout her entire body once more. The two remained the way they were for a few moments until Chihiro pulled out. The excess cum spewing out and pooling onto the floor. As the darkness began to encroach upon the gambler, only one thought began to fill her mind. 

Losing, was definitely not so bad every once and a while. 

[whoa-its-a-journal]

Journal 3′s “Bill’s Notes” Deciphered

In Journal 3, Bill uses a unique cipher (just a simple substitution “A=_” code) throughout. There’s a key in the book itself made by Stanford after he realizes that Bill has been the one writing them. 

Using the key, I’ve had a lot of fun deciphering Bill’s messages. Note that I don’t have the special blacklight version, so there may be some extra in it that I can’t decipher.

I’m sure someone’s already done this, but I wanted to try my hand.

Here’s what I’ve been able to decipher. I’ll include the page they’re on and what they say, starting from the beginning. Apostrophes will be added to make some things easier to read, but they do not appear in the original messages. Other punctuation will be omitted, so brace yourselves for run on sentences.

Page: Wolf doodles at the top and mountain drawing at the bottom Message: I’ve been inside your mind Sixer I know your secrets

Page: GNOMES Message: They’re too dumb to possess I’ve tried

Page: Myself Message: Birthday June fifteenth - Deathday sooner than you think Message 2 (on adjacent page): Little Cathy what a dream held her hand and made her scream

Page: The Bottomless Pit Message: Some of this junk ended {continued on adjacent page} up in my dimension

Page: A Bit of History Message: Asked shaman to build first portal big mistake the thing was made out of twigs guy lit himself on fire to try to end my reign drama queen

Page: The Great Secret of the Great Flood Message: Don’t care for Preston’s face might fix it one day

Page: “Fig A” of portal, following the “My Muse Has Spoken” pages Message: I’ll get this puppy up and running one day and neither time baby nor the big frilly know it all will stop me

Page: July 29th Message: One peek into my dimension and this bumpkin lost his weak little mind all he saw was me removing my exoskeleton to feed if you cant take the heat get out of the kitchen jack

Page: CODES Message: The time you’re wasting delights me (Fuck you Bill and/or Alex Hirsch, I’m enjoying this so it ISN’T a waste of time!)

Page: After “The Carny” and before “Squash with Human Face and Emotions” Message: Never trust a witch they’ll curse your ear and turn you into an immortal goat so I hear

Page: 3rd page after “The Encounter” Message: Thanks for letting me borrow your body Sixer enjoy the mystery bruises

Page: “I fell asleep on my cot only to awake sitting at my desk staring at the strange symbols inscribed below.” Message 1: You snooze you loose pal don’t you understand I’m only trying to free your dimension Message 2: I ask you why should they only move forward why must cause precede effect who voted on the laws of physics Message 3: Rules are perversion against all will that’s why I’m about to rewrite the whole system buddy and no one is going to stop me

That’s all I can find from Bill (in his cipher, at least!)

I’ll make posts deciphering the others another time. I still need to actually sit down and read the book lmao

[ July 17th 2022 ]

[shredsandpatches]

This is from Andrew Taylor’s “Anne of Bohemia and the Making of Chaucer,” one of the early forays into scholarship that takes Anne seriously as a person with influence instead of effectively accepting the judgment of the Westminster chronicler -- I opened it while looking for a different article in my novelthing research folder -- and I gotta say I have a lot of respect for Taylor for not softpedaling how nasty the chronicler actually was about her. The key word, of course, is carnis, which you have to stretch pretty far to translate as “humanity.” A.K. McHardy’s sourcebook (The Reign of Richard II: Minority to Tyranny, Manchester UP, 2012) leans even harder into the misogyny by translating tantilla carnis porcione as “such a tiny portion of meat,” a phrase that always makes me want to wash my eyeballs.

[thestalkerbunny]

About the new vampires-

-Tim and Tom are from a small religious community that would be akin to Amish (which wasn’t exactly getting the weird looks it does today because anyone who lived in the country and couldn’t afford a car used a horse and buggy) and claimed after their parents died, they just sorta wandered off into Debauchery. 

-Otis is from the ‘Backwoods’ which is a very large cover all term for the Deep Deep South and the states there in this universe where monsters and magic reign a bit more loosely because of it’s odd isolation from most modern human eyes. To put it on a map, it’d most likely be around either Mississippi or Arkansas where he’s from. He was brought in from the Backwoods by the vampire council to help out with Bower’s little ‘project’ because the Council is very interested in it.

-Tim and Tom often call Otis a hick; ironically they are calling the kettle black because they are from a similar background albiet they’re from the North.

-Otis’s snake’s name is Gammorah and he claims to have raised her from a snakelet. It is very ambiguous what exactly kind of snake she is, but her coloration indicated she is possibly a Diamond Back-despite those being found more commonly in Texas. Otis claims that snakes do not know what state boarders are, they just go where they please.

-Tim and Tom were turned by Bowers himself as a reward for loyalty towards him during his time of absence. Most of the inner circle was disposed of because of their subordination and attempt on Bower’s life. They are actually very content as vampires; citing they don’t mind being sterile creatures as Tim never liked kids and Tom’s claims that he was already shooting blanks. (2nd gen vampires cannot reproduce and are essentially sterile. They also lack the venom to make more vampires. They’re basically like Drones/Workers to a Hive Queen to simplify it.)

-Otis was turned by a Backwoods Vampire that apparently went by the name of ‘Meemaw’ or ‘GranGran’ by the locals despite not being related to anyone seemingly. He did what most vampire bats do to colony members who cannot feed themselves which is bring food back to them. He was hesitant to leave to go to the city of New Chicago without her blessing and was assured by the Council that another vampire would ensure she would be kept fed and well kept.

-Tim and Tom’s job can be summarized by going around collecting ‘payments’ from the families and businesses that benfit from their little ‘protection plan’ as mob outfits often do. Before Bowers dissapeared, they were on a strict money collection plan-but now with the odd reappearance and the vampiric numbers growing of the inner circle-they’ve been taking pints of blood in lieu of half payments-claiming they’re getting into the ‘medical business’. Not many people want to argue or question that, the Mob has dabbled in weirder things to make money.

-Otis is fasinated with a number of things that continously get him labeled as a ‘no nothing hick’ by Tim and Tom including-Light switches, the number 8 (it’s just a very balanced number, Otis claims) movies which he goes to frequently on his days off, Carnies, cigarette dispenser machines, Roulette wheels (the colors are pretty, he claims) Fancy Poodle Dogs, and most importantly, Board Walk Carnies-one of which he is very infatuated with.

[pamphletstoinspire]

The Season of Septuagesima Are you ready for Lent?  

Definition Septuagesima and Lent are both times of penance; Septuagesima being a time of voluntary fasting in preparation for the obligatory Great Fast of Lent. The theme is the Babylonian exile, the “mortal coil” we must endure as we await the Heavenly Jerusalem. Sobriety and somberness reign liturgically; the Alleluia and Gloria are banished

“The Sundays of Septugesima are named for their distance away from Easter:

The first Sunday of Septuagesima gives its name to the entire season as it is known as “Septuagesima.” “Septuagesima” means “seventy,” and Septuagesima Sunday comes roughly seventy days before Easter. This seventy represents the seventy years of the Babylonian Captivity. It is on this Sunday that the alleluia is “put away,” not to be said again until the Vigil of Easter.

The second Sunday of Septuagesima is known as “Sexagesima, which means “sixty”. Sexagesima Sunday comes roughly sixty days before Easter.

The third Sunday of Septuagesima is known as “Quinquagesima,” which means “fifty” and which comes roughly fifty days before Easter. Quadragesima means “forty,” and this is the name of the first Sunday of Lent and the Latin name for the entire season of Lent.

Throughout this short Season and that of Lent (next Season) you will notice a deepening sense of penance and somberness, culminating in Passiontide (the last two weeks of Lent), that will suddenly and joyously end at the Vigil of Easter on Holy Saturday when the alleluia returns and Christ’s Body is restored and glorified.” 

From The Liturgical Year by Abbot Gueranger

The season of Septuagesima comprises the three weeks immediately preceding Lent. It forms one of the principal divisions of the liturgical year, and is itself divided into three parts, each part corresponding to a week: the first is called Septuagesima; the second, Sexagesima; the third, Quinquagesima.

All three are named from their numerical reference to Lent, which, in the language of the Church, is called Quadragesima, that is, Forty, because the great Feast of Easter is prepared for by the holy exercises of forty days. The words Quinquagesima, Sexagesima, and Septuagesima, tell us of the same great solemnity as looming in the distance, and as being the great object towards which the Church would have us now begin to turn all our thoughts, desires, and devotion.

Now, the Feast of Easter must be prepared for by forty days of recollection and penance. Those forty days are one of the principal seasons of the liturgical year, and one of the most powerful means employed by the Church for exciting in the hearts of her children the spirit of their Christian vocation. It is of the utmost importance that such a season of grace should produce its work in our souls – the renovation of the whole spiritual life. The Church, therefore, has instituted a preparation for the holy time of Lent. She gives us the three weeks of Septuagesima, during which she withdraws us, as much as may be, from the noisy distractions of the world, in order that our hearts may be more readily impressed by the solemn warning she is to give us at the commencement of Lent by marking our foreheads with ashes.

This prelude to the holy season of Lent was not known in the early ages of Christianity: its institution would seem to have originated in the Greek Church. Besides the six Sundays of Lent, on which by universal custom the faithful have never fasted, the practice of this Church prohibited fasting on the Saturdays likewise; consequently their Lent was short by twelve days of the forty spent by our Savior doing penance in the desert. To make up the deficiency, they were obliged to begin their Lent many days earlier.

The Church of Rome had no such motive for anticipating the season of those privations which belong to Lent; for, from the earliest antiquity, She kept the Saturdays of Lent as fasting days. The Gallican liturgy, it is true, had retained the Greek custom; but it was abolished by the zeal of King Pepin and St. Karl the Great.

At the close of the 6th century, St. Gregory the Great alludes, in one of his homilies, to the fast of Lent being less than forty days, owing to the Sundays which come during that holy season. It was therefore, after the pontificate of St. Gregory, that the last four days of Quinquagesima were added to Lent, in order that the number of fasting days might be exactly forty. As early as the 9th century, the custom of beginning Lent on Ash Wednesday was of obligation in the whole Latin Church. All the manuscript copies of the Gregorian Sacramentary, which bear that date, entitle this Wednesday In capite jejunii, that is to say, the beginning of the fast. But, out of respect for the form of divine service drawn up by St. Gregory, the Church does not make any important change in the Office of these four days. Up to the Vespers of Saturday, when alone She begins the Lenten Rite, She observes the rubrics prescribed for Quinquagesima week.

Peter of Blois, who lived in the 12th century, tells us what was the practice in his days: “All religious begin the fast of Lent at Septuagesima; the Greeks, at Sexagesima; the secular clergy, at Quinquagesima; and the rest of Christians, who form the Church militant on earth, begin their Lent on the Wednesday following Quinquagesima.” The secular clergy, therefore, were bound to begin the fast two days before the laity – that is, on Monday, as we gather from the Life of St. Ulrich, Bishop of Augsburg, written in the 10th century. Quinquagesima was then called Dominica carnis privium sacerdotum, that is, priests’ carnival Sunday, when the announcement we made that the abstinence from meat was to begin on the following day.

This usage, however, soon became obsolete; and in the 15th century, the secular clergy, and even the monks themselves, began the Lenten fast, like the rest of the faithful, on Ash Wednesday.

There can be no doubt that the original motive for this anticipation was to remove from the Greeks the pretext of taking scandal at the Latins, if they did not fast fully forty days. Whilst faithful to Her ancient practice of fasting on Saturdays, the Roman Church gladly borrowed from the Greek Church the custom of preparing for Lent, by giving to the liturgy of the three preceding weeks a tone of holy mournfulness. Even as early as the beginning of the 9th century, the Alleluia and Gloria were suspended in the Septuagesima Offices. In the second half of the 11th century, Pope Alexander II enacted that this custom be everywhere observed, beginning with the 1st Vespers of Septuagesima.

Thus was the present important period of the liturgical year, after various changes, established in the cycle of the Church. It has been there for more than a thousand years. Its name, Septuagesima (seventy), expresses, as we have already remarked, a numerical relation to Quadragesima (the forty days); although in reality, there are not 70 but only 63 days from Septuagesima to Easter. This is partly to represent a profound mystery connected with the number 70. St. Augustine speaks of two times: the time before Easter, representing our sojourn on earth, and the time after Easter, representing eternity. The Church often speaks of two places corresponding to these two times, Babylon and Jerusalem. Now the Babylonian captivity lasted 70 years; and it is to express this mystery that the Church, according to all the great liturgists, uses the name Septuagesima for this season.

Again, the duration of the world itself, according to the ancient Christian tradition, is divided into seven ages. The human race must pass through seven ages before the dawning of the day of eternal life. The first age included the time from the creation of Adam to Noah; the second begins with Noah and the renovation of the earth by the deluge, and ends with the vocation of Abraham; the third opens with this first formation of God’s chosen people, and continues as far as Moses, through whom God gave the Law; the fourth consists of the period between Moses and David, in whom the house of Juda received the kingly power; the fifth is formed of the years which passed between David’s reign and the captivity of Babylon, inclusively; the sixth dates from the return of the Jews to Jerusalem, and takes us as far as the birth of our Savior. Then, finally, comes the seventh age; it starts with the rising of this merciful Redeemer, the Sun of Justice, and is to continue until the dread coming of the Judge of the living and the dead. These are the seven great divisions of time; after which, eternity.

Holy Mother Church reminds us during this season that we are sojourners upon this earth; we are exiles and captives in Babylon, that city which plots our ruin. The Church wishes us to reflect on the dangers that beset us; dangers which arise from ourselves and from creatures. During the rest of the year She loves to hear us chant the song of Heaven, the sweet Alleluia; but now, She bids us close our lips to this word of joy, because we are in Babylon.

The leading feature, then, of Septuagesima, is the total suspension of the Alleluia, which is not to be heard again upon the earth until the arrival of that happy day, when, having suffered death with our Jesus, and having been buried together with Him, we shall rise with Him to a new life. Perhaps we could not better show the sentiments, wherewith the Church would have her children to be filled at this period of Her year, than by quoting a few words from the eloquent exhortation, given to his people at the beginning of Septuagesima, by the celebrated St. Yvo of Chartres in the 11th century: ” ‘We know,’ says the Apostle, ‘that every creature groaneth, and travaileth in pain even till now: and not only it, but ourselves also, who have the first-fruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, waiting for the adoption of the sons of God, the redemption of our body’ (Rom. 8: 22, 23). The creature here spoken of is the soul, that has been regenerated from the corruption of sin unto the likeness of God: she groaneth within herself, at seeing herself made subject to vanity; she, like one that travaileth, is filled with pain, and is devoured by an anxious longing to be in that country, which is still so far off… During these days, therefore, we must do what we do at all seasons of the year, only we must do it more earnestly and fervently: we must sigh and weep after our country, from which we were exiled in consequence of having indulged in sinful pleasures; we must redouble our efforts in order to regain it by compunction and weeping of heart… Let us not become like those senseless invalids, who feel not their ailments and seek no remedy. We despair of a sick man who will not be persuaded that he is in danger. No, let us run to Our Lord, the Physician of eternal salvation. Let us show Him our wounds, and cry out to Him with all our earnestness: ‘Have mercy on me, O Lord, for I am weak’ (Ps. 6: 3). Then will He forgive us our iniquities, heal us of our infirmities and satisfy our desire with good things.” 

Brian Williams, from the “Liturgy Guy blog”, says “Thankfully, as more are introduced to the Traditional Mass of the Roman Rite, the brief season of Septuagesima is being reintroduced into the life of the Church. As this means more of the faithful can better prepare for, and enter deeper into, the season of Lent, it is an objectively positive development.” 

[prairiesongserial]

12.13

There wasn’t going to be a burlesque show that night for the good people of Kill Devil Hills, but the burlesque performers weren’t planning on surrendering the tent, either. They had Ezra and a new guitar player captive, and the game of the hour was trying to find a song that both of them knew and could play. Poor Cody was having trouble keeping up, missing notes and breaking rhythm with Ezra.

Friday was wearing sequined underwear, exactly as she was meant to be. She’d spent the last hour going through costumes, now that she and the rest of the burlesque performers were at a truce. It had really only been Abernathy, the red-haired woman with the pink eyepatch, who’d had a problem with her. Abernathy had disappeared with Ezra for a while to handle something or other, and while she was away, Friday had made nice with everyone else. She’d exchanged the contentious blond wig for a bubblegum pink one that was as long as her old blue wig had been - though she still had her eye on the blond. Short hair was so convenient. She’d be back for it.

“How many routines do you put on per night?” she asked as she shimmied herself into a very tight dress. The dress was cut so low it showed almost all of the black sequined bra she had on underneath. It had not been made with the flat-chested in mind.

“That depends,” said Shoshana, one of the other dancers. Friday had decided she liked Shoshana. She was dressed in a too-big button down tucked into too-big pants belted in place. Her sun-bleached brown curls were cropped just under her ears. Most importantly, she didn’t seem to have any intention of hazing Friday. Shoshana sat on top of an unopened crate labeled “heels - very high,” chewing an unlit cigarette. “We try to stick to five minutes per routine.”

“Oh, we did them a bit longer at the Ace,” Friday said. “And with music in between. Course, we were looking for the audience to stay and buy drinks all night, not tip every girl.”

Friday started to wiggle out of the dress. It wasn’t right, and there was a red one folded in the bottom of the crate that had her eye.

“That wouldn’t work here,” Shoshana said. “People hold onto their money tighter when there’s other tents still to visit - or if they saved the burlesque show for last, when their wallet’s already light. Better to get them in and out for the next round of tippers.”

A quick audience turnover sounded like a convenient set-up for any pickpockets working the crowd, but Friday decided not to say anything. Business was business.

Friday stepped into the red dress. It was made of shot silk, giving it an iridescent shimmer. It had a long slit up the side that ended at Friday’s hip. The dress had no straps, making the sequined bra look ridiculous underneath. She twisted herself to try to take it off without taking off the dress first.

“That one looks good on you,” Shoshana said. She finally lit her cigarette, as if only just realizing she hadn’t done so already.

“Thanks,” Friday said. “How nice do you think I have to be to Abernathy to keep that blond wig?”

“Pretty nice,” Shoshana admitted. “Good thing Abernathy likes me.” She took a long drag on her cigarette. “Hey, sunshine?” she called, grinning to show off a chrome tooth.

Abernathy, draped across the piano on the other side of the tent, looked up. “What?”

“I want the blond wig,” Shoshana replied.

Abernathy frowned at her. “To give to…”

“Look at her,” Shoshana said. “She’s a mess without it. Not fit to be seen.”

Friday crossed her arms. “Well, hold on,” she said.

Abernathy slid gracefully down from the piano, a hiss of air escaping from her false leg.

The roar of a truck engine interrupted the exchange. Abernathy continued to approach, but she walked past Friday without so much as looking at her. Friday followed her out of the tent. The truck was still a ways down the road, but it definitely belonged to the circus. It was the same truck that Val and Johannes had left in that morning..

Abernathy watched it approach. Behind them, the piano came to a discordant stop, leaving Cody’s guitar alone to practice the last few bars. In seconds, Ezra had joined them outside of the tent.

“Does he have any idea what time it is?” he muttered.

The truck approached quickly, spitting up dust under the tires. It didn’t rejoin the circle where the other trucks were parked, but shuddered to a halt at an angle right in front of Friday, Abernathy, and Ezra. Johannes tumbled out of the driver’s side, not bothering to close the door.

Friday’s eyes widened. Johannes was covered in ash. For a split second, she was looking at Val stumbling out of the back door of his church. Johannes strode up to Ezra and started talking quickly, but Friday’s ears were ringing. She couldn’t hear what they were saying.

“Val?” she said.

A crowd was growing around the truck as Val climbed down from the passenger side. He slammed the door closed behind him. She couldn’t see him - all she got was a passing glimpse through the windshield before the sun’s glare cut her short. Friday shouldered her way past several carnies, then finally turned the corner to face him.

She was staring the past right in the face. There were streaks of ash down Val’s cheeks. And his hair - his hair had caught fire in places. His shirt alone was suspiciously clean, as if he’d been wounded and treated and covered up again.

“It’s not even four o’clock, Friday,” he said chidingly, but with the slightest smile, as he leaned back against the truck. He averted his eyes in that infuriatingly polite way he always would when she was dressed for a performance.

Whatever Friday had been about to say to him fled her mind. Two separate memories of Val were smashed together in front of her, and it didn’t make sense. His words, even his posture, took her back to how things had been before John and Cody and the whirlwind that followed - he might have said the same thing to her some late afternoon at the church, her sitting on the edge of Val’s desk while he opened every drawer in search of the right size nail for a repair. But with ash smeared across his face, Val looked like he had stepped out of one of Friday’s worst days. She felt tears prick the corners of her eyes, and grit her teeth to hold them back, feeling lost.

“It’s for work,” Friday said, finally. She paused. She wanted to touch his face, to wipe the grime away with a sponge like she had done back at the Ace while the fire was spreading - what seemed like a lifetime ago. It had helped then, being able to do something. With Val awake, she didn’t quite dare.

“What happened to you?” she asked, uneasily.

Val shook his head. “It’ll sound worse than it was. It’s okay. I was, um, foggy for the whole thing.”

Now he looked as uneasy as she felt. Friday had blown up at him when he’d left this morning, after all.

“You’re not going to tell me?” Friday said, trying not to sound upset. She was going to add, “You got hurt,” but found that she couldn’t.

Johannes’s voice cut through the conversation before Val had a chance to reply.

“Pack it in,” he hollered to the crowd that had gathered. “The show’s cancelled. We leave in an hour.”

“We already started setting up,” Ezra snapped. “We can’t strike in just an hour. If you had told us - ”

“If I’d known earlier, I would’ve told you,” Johannes snapped back at him. “We have to move. Soon. Now.”

Ezra argued, but Friday didn’t catch his reply in the clamor from the rest of the circus. Her attention fell back on Val. She felt so angry, and so stupid. She’d let Johannes bully Val into going off alone with him, when she’d known Johannes wasn’t someone to be trusted. Now something had happened that was so awful Val didn’t even want to tell her. He looked nervously past her, and Friday wasn’t convinced it was just her outfit that had him acting so cagey.

“If I tell you, you won’t be happy,” Val said slowly.

“I’m already not happy,” Friday said, then clenched her teeth, trying to reign herself in.

“Okay, enough chit-chat,” Johannes said, suddenly in the middle of their conversation. “Ketsele, you’re with me for first aid and an emergency haircut. Friday…” He waved a hand dismissively. “Go do what Ezra tells you. Some of us were burned at the stake today.”

Johannes had begun to steer Val away, though Val shrugged out from under his arm. Friday saw red. She reached out and yanked a handful of tassels on the back of Johannes’s jacket as hard as she could, throwing him off balance and forcing him to turn back.

“What?” he yelled.

“I don’t know what happened,” she threw back. “But I know it was your fault, and I’d like to see a little remorse.”

Johannes raised his eyebrows.

“You two are very similar,” he said to Val, straightening his lapels.

“Friday - ” Val began.

“No!” Friday yelled. “I will not let it slide, and I will not accept that it ‘wasn’t that bad.’ Even if you don’t tell me. I know it was bad.” It was so bad you’re shutting me out, she thought. “Val, please. He’s not good.”

“I didn’t burn him at the stake,” Johannes argued. “What the hell did I do to you?”

Nothing, yet. Friday ignored him, looking at Val instead. He left Johannes’s side, coming to stand closer to her. She was overpowered by the smell of the ocean, sweat, and ash.

“I know how it sounds,” he said quietly. “But Johannes saved my life. I trust him.”

“I know you trust him,” Friday said, frustrated. Her eyes stung, and she couldn’t tell if it was from the smoke on Val’s clothes, or if she was about to cry. “I’m trying to tell you...he’s a con artist, okay? I know he’s grifting. I just...can’t see the big picture yet.”

Val shook his head. “Look, I have to…”

Friday grabbed the end of his sleeve.

“Are you okay?” she asked.

“I got singed,” Val said, with surprising humor. “Really nothing new.”

Friday nodded, and bit her lip. She wanted to hug him, but Val was already pulling away.

He smiled at her, then turned to Johannes, following the ringmaster’s lead across the camp. Johannes tried to put his arm around Val again, but Val ducked away. Friday watched him push Johannes’s head down like some rowdy kid, then fold his hands behind his back as if he hadn’t.

“You better watch it,” Johannes said, laughing. “I’m about to cut your hair.”

Friday slowly breathed out. The crowd had scattered at the announcement that everything had to be packed in an hour. The only still bodies were three she knew: Ezra, John, and the mechanic, Enis. Ezra and Enis were talking, clearly working through a problem. John was staring right at Friday.

She thought he must be staring at something behind her until he caught her eye and looked away.

“I’m gonna go change,” Friday muttered to no one.

12.12 || 12.14

[inkribbon796]

Egotober Day 25: Cobwebs and Cardboard

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31

Prompt: Haunted

Summary: Kay goes with some of the guys to a haunted house, one of those Halloween attraction ones.

Warnings: none

With Halloween so close, Egoton was in a bit of a mood and there were more than a couple attractions and haunted houses we’re going up.

The plan was for Ethan and Randall to take Eric but one thing led to another and the two were with Eric, and Illinois, and King. The latter had heard Illinois had tagged along with Eric and wanted to be there “just in case”.

The five of them were standing in front of what Ethan had found was the best rated haunted house in town.

Eric was hiding behind Illinois, looking up at it nervously, he was clutching his hand.

“What’s wrong, leoncito, you’ve faced scarier,” Illinois smiled at him.

“There’s people in there,” Eric complained into Illinois’s back.

Illinois’s smile fell and he wrapped and arm around Eric, “You don’t have to go in. We can stay outside, try to win some prizes or something.”

“You make out in the bushes and I’m getting a crow to throw food at you Ills,” King warned.

“Hey, come on, what did I do to you?” Illinois demanded.

“Really?” King stared at him. “I’ve been keeping track. You want my list, asshat?”

Illinois rolled his eyes, and quickly bent down to carry Eric over his shoulder, but Eric went about as straight as a board so the result was Eric bracing his hands on Illinois’s shoulders. Eric’s face went beet red and Illinois had this huge smile on his face.

“What’ll it be dulcito? The fake haunted house or do I get a head start on that huge stuffed unicorn at the front?”

Eric went impossibly redder, just staring at Illinois.

Illinois chuckled.

“I think his brain shut down,” Ethan teased.

“Yeah?” Illinois carefully put Eric back on his feet, “fine, I’ll put the pretty boy down.”

He bent his knees a little and inclined his head so that their eyes were level. “Let those thoughts in that pretty head come back up.” Then he winked.

“Oi, we’re still here,” King shouted at him. “How about you do that away from me.”

“Illy!” Eric squeaked out, covering his face.

“Okay, okay,” Illinois stood up straight again. “I’ll stop. So what’ll it be sweetheart. Haunted house or cute games?”

“Y-Y-ou wa-nna go,” Eric looked away, still flustered but clearly uncomfortable.

“Any fun I could have isn’t worth it if you’re not okay,” Illinois reminded. “So are we going to counter-scam a carnie or go into the haunted house?”

Eric was quiet for a long time, looking uneasy and playing with his hands a bit. Illinois just waited trying to look as calm and patient as possible.

It took a bit but Eric worried his lower lips with his teeth, looking away. “We . . . uh, um . . . can go into the h-ouse.”

“You sure?” Illinois asked. “We don’t have to.”

“I-I w-want to,” Eric looked more determined.

Illinois kissed Eric’s cheek, “If you ever want to leave, just give me a sign and I’ll take you back out, even if we’re about to finish.”

“I wi-ll,” Eric promised.

“Okay,” Illinois kissed Eric’s forehead and passed him a couple twenties. “Go with the boys get us three tickets.”

“I can pay for myself,” King told him.

“아빠 would never let me hear the end of it,” Illinois told King.

Eric nodded and walked off with Ethan and Randall to a ticket stall outside the haunted house. Leaving Illinois and King standing away from them.

“So, you tell the Old Man yet?” King asked as the two of them just watched the former apprentices getting tickets.

“He knows I’ve got a new travel partner,” Illinois admitted. “The invoices show there are two people on his bills so I could just lie about that.”

“Why not tell him?” King said. “You’re obviously over the moon about him.”

“Don’t want my luck to run out,” Illinois defended, looking at Eric. “The long I wait, the longer my luck holds out.”

King frowned, “Haven’t you found some amulet that counteracts it by now?”

Illinois sighed, “There is no counter-curse, no spell, no lucky charm that is enough when my luck finally runs out. I can only hope that when it runs out again that Eric isn’t with me.”

“Do you think it ran out when I was sent to watch Artie?” King voiced a question he had for a while now.

“Dark and Host don’t blame me, but I do,” Illinois answered.

King was quiet for a second or two before tugging on his arm, “It wasn’t, your fault. There was nothing you could have done.”

Then before Illinois could argue further, King shoved him a bit, “Come on, let’s catch up with the guys, before they get themselves into trouble.”

Illinois smiled and they walked over to the others.

“Keep taking care of Eric and we won’t have any problems,” King told Illinois, “he’s a nice kid.”

“Huh, what was that?” Ethan said, looking over them.

“I said Illy’s a piece of shit,” King corrected. “Long may he reign, the prince of assholes.”

Illinois chuckled, rolling his eyes. The adventurer wrapped an arm around Eric’s back and leaned in. “Had fun at the ticket booth, dulcito?”

Eric just shrugged, staring at Illinois.

They headed into the haunted house, the result was that Eric stayed clutched to Illinois’s side for most of the time, almost stumbling as he was startled. Illinois asking if he wanted to leave a couple of times, but Eric just clung to him and insisted on continuing. Illinois did wind up picking him and carrying him halfway through, promising to protect him.

Ethan and Randall were having fun, giggling and chuckling the whole way through. King was the only one who didn’t have a noticeable reaction for most of it. He occasionally jumped and there was a room that Illinois and King stared into the room in surprise and with a bit of trepidation. It was a room with a mad doctor and slabs of meat and realistic fake skeletons. They glanced between each other and just sprinted into the next room.

But the group walked out the other side and Illinois raced for a bench to put Eric down, trying to calm him down. Thankfully he wasn’t in a panic attack. The two were talking between each other quietly and there was a gentle promise that Eric would not go to another haunted house.

They went to go get some corn dogs after Eric felt like walking again.

“Sorry you didn’t have fun,” Ethan apologized to King.

“What?” King asked in confusion, munching on the contents of a bag of popcorn.

“At the haunted house,” Ethan clarified.

“Oh,” King realized. “Nah, I had fun, it was alright.”

“Yeah, but yah didn’t get scared,” Randall reminded.

King shrugged, “There’s nothing really scary about a fake haunted house. Yeah I got startled a couple of times, and that effect with the fake organs did make me do a double take but it’s all cobwebs and cardboard.”

“We technically lived in a haunted house anyways,” Illinois told them, tipping his hat up.

“Wait you lived in the Manor, man?” Randall asked.

“Yep,” Illinois popped the “p” on the end. “It got freaky at night. Never had to have a curfew.”

“How bad was it?” Ethan asked leaning forward.

King glared at Illinois, “Usually nothing happened except for the changing hallways, it took forever for me to find the bathroom at night when I first got there. It’s really easy to find the back porch, impossible to find anything else.”

Illinois tapped King’s arm with the back of his hand, “What about that time in the attic?”

“Which time in the attic?” King asked.

“You know when you and Yan came crying down the stairs?” Illinois told him.

“Ohhhh,” King remembered, and smiled. “Huddle up.”

Randall dropped his elbows on the table, Ethan had a huge smile on his face.

“Okay, how old were we, Ills,” King started.

“It must have been about a year and some change since we were adopted,” Illinois waived his hand. Eric was halfway onto his lap, trying to cuddle up next to Illinois.

“So I was about six, Yan was about five, and it was hot as balls in the middle of the summer. It was that one year with the heat wave and it was so hot that even the Manor was overheating. So Yan and I were up in attic, because we can’t go in the basement.”

“Why?” Eric managed to ask.

King sighed, “Because Dark kills people down there, it’s like Wil’s set couch, we just don’t go there unless you’re helping kill people, so I never went in the basement. Anyways we’re we’re fucking around in the attic and Yan was in Bim’s old crib and I was checking out this broken cursed looking mirror when I look over and I see Dark standing in a corner of the attic watching us. He’s in this nice red tux and he’s smiling at me. Except his smile is kinda freaking me out.”

King’s smile faded. “So I call out, ‘Mr. Dark?’ ‘Cause I used to be formal with him. And down the stairs I hear footsteps and Dark calls out, ‘What is it Kay?’ I look back at ‘Dark’ and he’s gone. The real Dark is walking up the stairs. After I asked him about it, we’re taken out of the attic and he locked us out of the attic for a month. He spent the rest of the day watching us like a hawk and the next time I went up with Illy, the attic is clear of ghosts”

“So what was it?” Randall asked.

King shrugged.

“Yanc called him ‘the Shadow Man’ cause he has all this black smoke around him,” Illinois answered. “Dark always got super protective when he was around so we always assumed he was one of those bad spirits.”

“Like Dark?” Ethan asked.

Illinois made a scoffing sound, “Dark’s a demon, big difference. Spirits can’t affect their environments, demons are way more dangerous. Either way whenever the Shadow Man was in a part of the house Dark would throw a barrier up and we couldn’t go in that part of the house until Dark deemed it safe. Once we were barred from going outside without him watching over us for a month. Artie and Bim went insane, it was fun to watch.”

“For you,” King grumbled.

“So is that thing still around the Manor?” Ethan asked.

“Don’t know why he wouldn’t be,” King answered. “Maybe Dark pissed him off and he’s haunting Dark. I don’t know, I’ve tried looking into him and so far I’ve found nothing. But that doesn’t mean I’ve given up.”

“So has he done anything to you guys, stood over your bed as you slept, or fucked with the lights?” Ethan asked.

“Not to us,” King reported. “I haven’t seen or heard anything to suggest it’s a demon or a poltergeist. Glad I moved out, that mess is your problem.” He nudged Illinois.

“No,” Illinois smiled. “I don’t get the cursed mansion, I get the cursed lake house. Big difference. The Shadow Man doesn’t live there. Bim gets to deal with the cursed mansion, I don’t want anything to do with that cursed house besides my stuff. Bim can have the house.”

“B-im in-herits the M-Manor?” Eric asked. “But Da-rk can’t die?”

Illinois shrugged, “Didn’t stop him from making a will, I think he does it to make himself feel better, or maybe the Old Man’s gonna skip town for a hundred years to add some pizazz to his life, I don’t know.”

“Weird,” Ethan commented.

“That will isn’t getting used anytime soon,” Illinois excused. He stood up and held out an elbow for Eric. “Now if you’ll excuse us, boys, we have some carnival games to win.”

Eric blush returned as he grabbed onto Illinois’s arm. Illinois helped him up and they walked away.

The other three watched them walk away. Ethan getting up, “Well I’m gonna have fun on some of those rides.”

“Wanna go stalk an’ torment the lovebirds?” Randall smiled at King.

“Why do you think I’m here?” King smiled, they split ways to enjoy the rest of the festivities.