#CAA where is your RAGE? fuck them all over???

[adimouze]

Daniel’s literally shooting Las Vegas promo and you’re telling me this is his last race like okay babes sure go to bed or something

[warlockwriter]

To  Lose Thee Were To Lose Myself: Chapter 9

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 |Chapter 7 | Chapter 8

Chapter 9/10

Pairing: Gabriel/Sam

Chapter Word Count: 1578 (Story total so far: 16088)

Summary:  Sam didn’t believe the “new man” speech from Gabriel, but he understood recovery and knew sometimes you just had to put on a brave face. He still struggled with his own recovery journey. Perhaps the two of them could help each other? And gank a few monsters along the way?

A/N: Begins right after 13x20 and goes canon divergent from there. Title from Paradise Lost by John Milton. Many thanks to @archangelgabriellives for the beta read and a couple of awesome suggestions/additions! Story is complete. I’m just trying the serial approach because I’ve never done it with a fanfic before.

Ao3 Link

Sam woke to an empty bed. That shouldn’t have been a surprise to him. He awoke almost every morning to an empty bed. Today, however, he couldn’t help but remember waking up the previous morning with an archangel glued to his back.

That finalized his decision. He genuinely liked touching Gabriel, and that wasn’t going to be possible without completing the bonding. Cas and Dean seemed content with it. Gabriel clearly wanted and needed it, and Sam found himself wanting to give this to the angel.

He cautiously poked at his memory of the Trickster and Dean’s many deaths on a Tuesday. Yes, the memory was still there. Yes, remembering his brother die again and again still hurt, but the overpowering rage he had felt for Gabriel was gone. In its place was acceptance, and, he guessed, forgiveness.

Sam nodded. Yes, bonding with Gabriel was both what he wanted and the right thing to do. He still wondered what it would feel like, be like, but he knew he’d find out soon.

He dressed and tucked his gun in his waistband. Even though he had no plans to leave the Bunker, he still felt naked without it. Dean tended to do the same thing. Years of being on the road and hunting things left their mark.

Sam left his room and headed for the kitchen, figuring everyone would be there. As he entered, he saw Dean finishing up his breakfast. His brother was attempting to convince Cas to try a home fry.

“Dean, I have told you many times that I can not taste food.”

Dean shook his head. “Yeah, that’s not the case according to your brother. He says he can taste food just fine and that you should be able to as well.”

Cas sighed and picked up the piece of potato, regarding it as if it were something he would rather smite than eat. Sam realized that Gabriel wasn’t present, but he was curious about Cas’ reaction to food and decided not to interrupt to ask after the archangel.

Caa put the piece of potato in his mouth, rolled it around, chewed thoughtfully and then swallowed.

“Well?” Dean asked.

“It’s...not bad. I can still discern the individual molecules, but I believe I can also detect the taste of the whole.”

A smile spread across Dean’s face, and he clapped Cas on the shoulder. “See, Gabe knew what he was talking about. You just need to keep trying.”

“If you say so, Dean.” Cas sounded as if he were being asked to do laundry or some other chore.

Sam cleared his throat. Both his brother and angel looked up to see him in the doorway. “Glad you can taste food, Cas. Any idea where your brother is?”

Cas’ eyes grew distant in concentration for a moment before he nodded and said, “He is on the road to town, about a mile distant.”

Sam frowned. Gabriel wasn’t leaving, was he? “Is he coming or going?”

Another moment of concentration. “He is coming closer.”

Smiling in relief, Sam said, “I’ll go meet him then.”

“Have you made a decision, Sam?” Cas asked.

“Yeah, I have.” He was still smiling and knew Cas would figure out his answer from that. “I’ll tell him when I see him.”

Cas gave him a half smile in return. “That is good. I’m sure my brother will be happy to hear your answer.”

Dean was glancing back and forth between them. Then he nodded and grinned at his brother. “Way to go, Sammy.”

Sam turned to leave, but of course, Dean had to have the last word. “But I don’t want to hear anything weird coming from your room, Sam!”

Sam cheerfully flipped off his brother as he left the kitchen.

If Gabriel was about a mile out, Sam would probably meet him halfway, which wouldn’t take long. He found himself excited to see the archangel, and he hurried his steps. Sure enough, he’d been walking less than ten minutes when he saw Gabriel up ahead. Waving, he broke into a half-run. Okay, it was probably cheesy, but he felt like something was pulling him forward.

As he got closer, he saw a smile start to grow on Gabriel’s face, but, as he watched, the smile morphed into a look of horror. “Sam!” Gabriel yelled.

Sam didn’t stop to think. His body moved in familiar patterns as he drew his gun, angled off the road for the dubious shelter of a nearby tree and scanned his surroundings for threats. He noted Gabriel had a blade in his hand, and the archangel was running, expression grim.

The tall hunter finally saw what had spooked the angel. Four creatures were charging across the field by the side of the road. Sam’s mind calmly notified him that they were facing two werewolves and two vampires. Apparently the monsters they had killed had friends.

This wasn’t good. His only weapon was his gun, and it had normal bullets. Gabriel had his blade, but with his grace so low, Sam wasn’t sure he’d be able to smite, and angel blades couldn’t kill vampires or werewolves without grace to back up the attack.

Running was no use, so Sam knelt down to steady his aim and fired five bullets in quick succession. Four hit their targets, with only one going wide. One werewolf landed on his face, his knee exploded. The two vampires paused to pull bullets out of their respective shoulders. The second werewolf tumbled to the ground, briefly incapacitated by a gut shot.

While the monsters wouldn’t stay down long, Sam’s attack bought enough time for Gabriel to join the fight. Even weakened by low grace, these monsters couldn’t cause him permanent harm, and the archangel charged recklessly into their midst. He stabbed one of the vampires, and Sam saw a tiny trickle of grace, enough to cause the bloodsucker to wince but not enough to harm him.

Sam noticed a good-sized tree branch nearby, and he nodded to himself in satisfaction. It wouldn’t hurt the monsters, but it would give him something to parry with, and he might get lucky enough to knock out one of the werewolves. They were slightly more vulnerable than the vampires.

The werewolf who had been hit in the gut recovered enough to manage a hobbling charge toward Sam, who fired two more bullets into him. He got lucky. One was a head shot. That would take the monster out of the fight for the moment.

Unfortunately, one of the vampires must have decided a human was an easier target than an archangel, and he started running in Sam’s direction. The other werewolf was shaking off his injury and was about to rejoin the fight. Gabriel was holding his own against the second vampire, but it was a delaying game, and the hunter knew it.

He still had plenty of ammunition, and he used it all. He fired two more shots into the downed werewolf, three into the recovering werewolf and the rest into the vampire. Then he dropped his gun and brandished the branch.

The vampire shook off the bullets and started forward, confidence in his stride. “You’ve been watching too much Buffy if you expect that to work.”

Sam didn’t rise to the bait, holding his ground, ready for the approaching vampire.

Just then, Gabriel stabbed his vampire, and there was a brief flash of grace followed by a loud scream. The vampire dropped. One monster out of the fight. Sam just hoped that hadn’t been all the juice the archangel had left.

Sam’s vampire whirled toward the scream at the same time Gabriel yelled, “Be ready, Sam.” The archangel concentrated for a moment and snapped his fingers.

Nothing happened.

“Fuck!” Gabriel yelled.

The vampire smiled and turned back for Sam.

Both werewolves were stirring now. Sam wasn’t sure how they were going to get out of this. He watched the vampire approach, ready to defend himself, hopefully to buy some time for Gabriel to do something.

Just on the edge of his vision, he saw Gabriel snap his fingers again. Suddenly, Sam was holding a machete instead of a tree branch. Sam smiled. Now the odds were more in his favor.

Apparently, the vampire hadn’t noticed the change in weapon because he charged the remaining  distance. Sam set his feet, prepared, and, the instant the vampire was close enough, he slashed right through its neck.

The vampire’s head rolled several feet, eyes open wide in stunned disbelief.

Sam didn’t have time to appreciate his victory because both werewolves were now charging him. He heard Gabriel’s yell and presumed the archangel was on his way to help, but the monsters got to him first. Sam was able to cut the arm off of one, but the other ducked under Sam’s machete and took him down, claws ripping deep into the hunter’s belly.

Sam tried to get the machete up and in position to defend himself, but his arms felt so weak that he could barely lift the blade. The werewolf clearly didn’t consider him a threat anymore, and he rose to meet the charge of a furious archangel.

Sam could feel blood flowing down his pants, and he could barely keep his eyes open against the weakness and pain. He was just conscious enough to see Gabriel slide to a halt, standing over Sam’s fallen body. As his vision grayed out, he thought he saw wings arching protectively over him.

TBC

@snips-snails-skittles @idabbleincrazy @sageclover61 @ihaveallthesefeelsokay @calamitychaos @gryffindorofcabin21 @kydrogen-monoxide @everyoneforgetsadam @team-gabriel @shiny-crystaline @samuelwinschester @hankypranky