#Buying Home Water Heater

[loudruinsnightmare]

How to Choose the Best Geyser for Your Home

How to Choose the Best Geyser for Your Home can be a daunting task, especially with the myriad of options available in the market. A geyser, or water heater, is an essential appliance that provides hot water for daily needs, including bathing, cleaning, and cooking. Choosing the right geyser involves considering various factors such as capacity, energy efficiency, type, and safety features. In this comprehensive Home Geyser Guide, we will provide Expert Geyser Tips to help you make an informed decision. Ram Services and Sales is committed to helping you find the perfect water heater for your home. For more details, visit Ram Services and Sales.

Understanding the Basics of Home Geysers

What is a Geyser?

A Home Water Heater, commonly known as a geyser, is an appliance that heats water for domestic use. Geysers can be powered by electricity, gas, or solar energy, and come in various sizes and capacities to suit different household needs.

Types of Geysers

Storage Geysers: These are the most common type, featuring a tank that stores hot water. They are ideal for larger households and provide a continuous supply of hot water.

Instant Geysers: These are compact units that heat water on demand. They are suitable for smaller households or for areas with limited space.

Gas Geysers: These use natural gas or LPG to heat water and are known for their energy efficiency and quick heating capabilities.

Solar Geysers: These use solar energy to heat water and are an eco-friendly option, although they require a significant initial investment and sufficient sunlight.

Expert Geyser Tips for Choosing the Right Geyser

Assess Your Water Heating Needs

Understanding your household’s hot water needs is the first step in Choosing Home Geyser. Consider the number of family members, the frequency of hot water usage, and the specific purposes for which hot water is needed. Larger families or homes with multiple bathrooms may require a storage geyser, while smaller families or single occupants might find an instant geyser sufficient.

Determine the Capacity

The capacity of the geyser is a crucial factor in selecting the Best Geyser for Home. Storage geysers typically range from 10 to 50 liters, while instant geysers are available in capacities from 1 to 10 liters. Here’s a quick guide:

10-15 liters: Suitable for single occupants or small families with minimal hot water needs.

15-25 liters: Ideal for small to medium-sized families.

25-50 liters: Best for larger families or households with higher hot water consumption.

Energy Efficiency

Energy efficiency is an important consideration to reduce electricity bills and environmental impact. Look for geysers with a high energy efficiency rating (BEE star rating in India). Gas and solar geysers are generally more energy-efficient compared to electric geysers. Choosing an energy-efficient geyser can lead to significant savings in the long run.

Consider the Type of Geyser

The type of geyser you choose should depend on your specific needs and the availability of resources. Electric geysers are widely used and easy to install, but gas geysers offer quicker heating and cost savings on electricity. Solar geysers are the most environmentally friendly option but require adequate sunlight and a higher initial investment.

Safety Features

Safety should be a top priority when Choosing Home Geyser. Look for geysers with safety features such as:

Thermostat: Controls the temperature and prevents overheating.

Thermal Cut-Out: Automatically shuts off the power if the water temperature exceeds safe levels.

Pressure Release Valve: Releases excess pressure to prevent tank rupture.

Rust-Proof Body: Ensures durability and safety over time.

Installation and Space

Consider the space available for installing the geyser. Instant geysers are compact and can be installed in smaller spaces, while storage geysers require more room. Ensure that the installation location is convenient and allows easy access for maintenance.

Budget and Cost

Budget is an essential factor when Buying a Home Water Heater. While it’s important to choose a geyser that meets your needs, it should also fit within your budget. Keep in mind the long-term savings from energy efficiency and durability when making your decision. Sometimes, investing a bit more upfront can save money in the long run.

Geyser Selection Tips for Optimal Performance

Regular Maintenance

Regular maintenance is crucial for the longevity and efficiency of your geyser. Schedule periodic checks to ensure that the heating elements, thermostat, and other components are functioning correctly. Descaling and cleaning the tank can prevent mineral buildup and extend the lifespan of your geyser.

Professional Installation

Ensure that your geyser is installed by a professional to avoid any safety hazards and to guarantee optimal performance. Proper installation also includes securing the geyser correctly and ensuring all safety features are in place.

Insulation

Proper insulation of the geyser and the pipes can help retain heat and improve energy efficiency. This reduces the energy required to reheat the water, leading to cost savings on your electricity bill.

Monitor Temperature Settings

Setting the thermostat to an optimal temperature (typically 50-60°C) can prevent overheating, reduce energy consumption, and extend the life of your geyser. Avoid setting the temperature too high, as it can increase energy costs and pose safety risks.

The Role of Ram Services and Sales

Ram Services and Sales near by Ram Coolers is dedicated to providing top-quality Home Water Heaters and exceptional customer service. Their range of Top Geysers for Home ensures that you find the perfect solution for your water heating needs. With expert guidance and professional installation services, Ram Services and Sales makes the process of Choosing Home Geyser hassle-free and efficient. For more information, visit Ram Services and Sales.

>> Also Read: How to Choose the Right RO Water Purifier for Your Home

Conclusion

Choosing the Best Geyser for Home involves careful consideration of various factors, including capacity, energy efficiency, type, safety features, and budget. By following this Geyser Buying Guide and leveraging Expert Geyser Tips, you can make an informed decision that ensures a reliable and efficient hot water supply for your household. Ram Services and Sales is your trusted partner in finding the ideal geyser, offering expert advice and a wide range of high-quality options. Invest in a reliable water heater today and enjoy the comfort and convenience of hot water whenever you need it.

FAQs

Q: What is the best type of geyser for home use?

A: The best type of geyser for home use depends on your specific needs and water consumption. Storage geysers are suitable for larger households, while instant geysers are ideal for smaller homes or limited spaces. Gas and solar geysers are also excellent choices for energy efficiency.

Q: How do I choose the right capacity for my home geyser?

A: To choose the right capacity, consider the number of family members and daily hot water usage. Small families or single occupants can opt for a 10-15 liter geyser, while larger families may need a 25-50 liter capacity.

Q: What safety features should I look for in a home geyser?

A: Look for safety features such as a thermostat, thermal cut-out, pressure release valve, and a rust-proof body. These features ensure safe operation and prevent accidents.

Q: How can I ensure my geyser is energy efficient?

A: Choose a geyser with a high energy efficiency rating (BEE star rating), and consider gas or solar options for better efficiency. Proper insulation and regular maintenance also contribute to energy savings.

Q: Why is professional installation important for a home geyser?

A: Professional installation ensures that the geyser is installed safely and correctly, minimizing the risk of accidents and ensuring optimal performance. It also guarantees that all safety features are properly set up.

>>> Contact us today for any queries!

[evergreenbcc]

Evergreen Complete Range of Home Improvement Products

Evergreen Building and Construction Corp offers a comprehensive range of home improvement solutions, including top-tier solar panels for home energy efficiency, HVAC systems for perfect climate control, water heaters for homes, metal roofs, solar attic fans and more. Visit their website now and choose their services for a greener, more efficient, and comfortable home.

[byasharma3]

Heat Pump Water Heaters vs. Traditional Water Heaters

Heat pump water heaters represent a significant advancement in water heating technology, offering substantial energy savings and environmental benefits compared to traditional systems. While they come with considerations such as higher initial costs and specific installation requirements, their long-term advantages make them a compelling choice for many homeowners and businesses.

By understanding the operational principles, benefits, and challenges associated with heat pump water heaters, you can make an informed decision that aligns with your energy efficiency goals and contributes to a more sustainable future.

[jupitersolar]

Solar Water Heaters: Heating Your Home Efficiently

Solar Water Heaters: Heating Your Home Efficiently

Solar water heaters are a sustainable and cost-effective solution for heating your home. In this comprehensive guide, we'll dive into how these innovative systems work and the numerous benefits they offer.

How Solar Water Heaters Work:

Solar water heaters harness sunlight to heat water. They consist of solar collectors, a heat transfer system, and a storage tank. Here's how it all comes together:

Solar Collectors: These panels or tubes capture sunlight and convert it into heat energy.

Heat Transfer System: The collected heat is transferred to the water through a heat exchanger. Storage Tank: Heated water is stored for later use, ensuring a constant supply of hot water.

Solar Water Heaters Heating Your Home Efficiently

Benefits of Solar Water Heaters:

Installing a solar water heater brings several advantages to your home and the environment:

Energy Savings: Solar heaters significantly reduce your energy bills. Environmentally Friendly: They reduce greenhouse gas emissions and dependence on fossil fuels. Low Maintenance: Minimal upkeep is required for these systems. Government Incentives: Many governments offer incentives and tax rebates for solar water heater installations. Increase Home Value: Solar heaters can increase the resale value of your home.

Choosing the Right Solar Water Heater:

Selecting the perfect solar water heater for your needs involves considering factors like climate, budget, and hot water demand. Buy solar heaters from Jupiter Solar www.jupitersolars.in .Here's how to make the right choice:

Evaluate Your Hot Water Needs: Determine the amount of hot water your household requires.

Climate Considerations: Consider your local climate's solar potential. System Types: Learn about the different types of solar water heaters (active, passive, etc.).

Budget and Incentives: Factor in costs and potential government incentives.

Professional Installation: Consult with a solar expert for guidance.

Installation and Maintenance Tips:

Proper installation and maintenance are essential for the longevity of your solar water heater:

Professional Installation: Always hire a certified installer for a safe and efficient setup.

Regular Inspections: Check for leaks, damaged components, or dirt accumulation.

Seasonal Adjustments: Make seasonal adjustments to optimize system performance.

Cleaning Panels: Keep solar collectors clean from dust and debris. Replace Anode Rods: Replace anode rods in the storage tank as needed.

Solar Water Heaters vs. Traditional Heating Systems:

Comparing solar water heaters to traditional heating methods can help you make an informed decision:

Cost Savings: Solar heaters have lower operating costs. Environmental Impact: Solar heaters are eco-friendly, reducing carbon emissions.

Reliability: Traditional systems may experience outages, while solar heaters are consistent.

Initial Investment: Solar heaters require an upfront investment but pay off in the long run.

Government Support: Many governments incentivize solar heater adoption.

Conclusion:

Solar water heaters are a smart choice for homeowners looking to reduce energy costs and minimize their environmental footprint. With the right system, installation, and maintenance, you can enjoy efficient and sustainable home heating while contributing to a greener future. Start your journey towards a warmer, eco-friendly home today!

[woestruckalex]

my plan is literally perfect tho

[bi-writes]

Simon short circuiting when his mail order bride does something kind for him :)) uses her new credit card to buy him his favorite tea and cat treats for bonding with his new baby <3

mail-order bride

simon lets out a deep breath as he slips his boots off. he pulls his tact vest over his head, dropping it beside his shoes before rolling out his neck. he's exhausted. he's been awake for 36 hours at least, and not even a few hours ago, he had been camped out on a rooftop with nothing but his sniper rifle for company.

you pad into the living room, dressed in cute cherry-printed pajamas. little shorts with a matching short-sleeve top, and you smile shyly when you see him standing by the door. your eyes wander a little; you've never seen him with his gear on, and he's surprised you're not more startled by the skull mask he's wearing.

his head darts to the side when he sees the cat hopping along the shelves on the wall. the cat launches itself off the closest shelf, landing on the back of his shoulders and nuzzling along the back of his head before dropping onto the floor to weave between his legs.

"welcome home," you say softly, coming closer, and simon just nods. you reach up when you get closer, slipping your hands under his hoodie to find the hem of his mask. you pull it up gently over his head, smiling a little wider when you reveal his face underneath. he has eye-black smudged around his eyes, but otherwise, your husband looks his normal self, aside from the dark circles under his eyes.

you understand immediately that simon isn't in a good mood. he's irritated, tired, sour-faced and agitated. you smooth your hands down his chest before kneeling on the carpet. simon blinks, confused, but then he watches as you start to unbuckle the holsters around his thighs. you get him undressed enough that he's just wearing his jeans and his hoodie, and he takes your hand gently to help you stand back up. you hook your pinkie around his, guiding him to take a seat on the couch before you disappear into the kitchen.

simon leans his head back against the couch, shutting his eyes gently. to come home to a warm place, one filled with another person, it's frighteningly comforting. he has always come home to the dark. to the heater off and all the rooms empty. to silence and his own terrifying thoughts.

"simon?"

he opens his eyes and sits up a little, blinking the sleep away as you come closer. he hums when he sees you holding a mug, walking slow as you try and keep it steady. you hand him the mug, watching as he takes a slow sip of it.

he shuts his eyes, letting out a shaky breath. it's perfect. he's never told you how he prefers his tea, but it's got just a splash of milk and nothing more. the thoughtfulness warms him more than the drink does, and he curls his toes a little as he tries not to think about it too hard.

"oh!" you smile. "i-i...i filled your car up, and i-i got you something when i went to get a water."

you scurry towards your purse by the door, rummaging through it before you pull out a little crinkled paper bag. you sit next to him on the couch and hand it to him after he sets his tea down on the coffee table.

he reaches into the bag and wraps his hand around a little plastic trinket, pulling it out. he blinks, hooking a gloved finger through the little keychain he's holding. he holds it up, face neutral, but after a few moments, a low chuckle leaves him.

it's a little skeleton, and the bones of it wiggle and dance when he shakes it.

"i...i thought of you when i saw it," you laugh a little, and he watches as the cat hops up onto your lap, moving over your legs to sniff at the little skeleton simon is holding up. after a few moments, the cat reaches up with a paw and smacks the skeleton, watching it shake and wiggle before smacking it again.

"yeah?" simon murmurs, meeting your eyes. "you miss me?"

"y-yes...yeah. w-we missed you."

[everestshopping]

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Function of Stabilizer 

Have you ever had power outages in your house, causing your appliances to shut off unexpectedly? If this is the case, you are not alone. Voltage fluctuations are frequent in many homes and can cause electronic items to fail. 

Many people use appliance stabilizers to avoid this from happening. But what good is a stabilizer? 

 Provides protection against voltage fluctuations 

 Extends the useful life of your items

 Enhances energy efficiency 

 Maintains steady cooling

Which brand stabilizer is Best Stabilizer for Home?

There are various manufacturers to choose from when to Buy Voltage Stabilizer Online for your appliances. Each manufacturer has its own set of features and specs, making it tough to select the finest one. However, EVEREST Stabilizer is a terrific alternative if you're seeking for a dependable and trusted brand.

EVEREST Stabilizer is a well-known global brand for high-quality electrical goods and solutions. Their stabilizers are intended to safeguard electrical equipment, such as refrigerators, televisions, and air conditioners, from voltage fluctuations and to provide optimal performance.

EVEREST Stabilizer provides a diverse selection of stabilizers to meet a variety of needs and budgets. Their stabilizers have advanced functions such as voltage correction, overload prevention, and automatic restart, which ensure the safety and longevity of your refrigerator.

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[livwritesstuff]

inspired by a nate bargatze sketch

Eddie’s least favorite thing people say when they find out he’s gay and married to a man is when they ask who the “man” of their house is, because…it’s fucking stupid and wouldn’t be funny even if it didn’t rely on patriarchal bullshit that Eddie didn’t buy into even before he and Steve had three daughters.

The thing is though…there definitely is a man of their house, and it’s Steve.

And if Steve isn’t home, it’s their oldest daughter, Moe.

Eddie knows this is true because there’s someone coming to their house to work on…something. All Eddie caught when Steve brought it up was, “We’ve been in this house for almost twenty years. I’d rather deal with it now than wait until it’s causing problems.”

So it’s either the roof, the water heater, or the furnace.

(He thinks).

Every once in a while Eddie gets frustrated enough about this to want to get more involved – he helped Wayne out with this shit all the time when he was a teenager, and he worked as a mechanic well into his twenties (up until he got his first book deal and was able to quit and write full-time). It’s not that Eddie can’t understand all that stuff – no, it’s Steve insisting that he take on all that kind of stuff in their life together so that Eddie didn’t have to that did it, and now it’s been so long since he exercised that part of his brain that it’s basically gone dormant.

The nail in the coffin is when Steve says, “If he shows up before I get back – do not engage. Get Moe. She knows what this is all about.”

She totally does, is the thing, so Eddie just replies, “Got it,” and prays that Steve gets home from the hardware store before the contractor arrives (is he a contractor? Eddie doesn’t think he even knows what a contractor is).

Naturally, not even five minutes after Steve pulls out of the driveway, a dark blue van pulls in.

“Ah, shit,” Eddie mumbles, and then he calls upstairs, “Moe. The guy Pop was talking about is here.”

Moe calls something incomprehensible back (hopefully it’s I’ll be down in a second) because by the looks of it this guy is already halfway to the front door.

Unfortunately for Eddie, Moe is not down in a second and he ends up in a conversation about water heaters with…not a contractor, he’s pretty sure. A plumber, maybe? Doesn’t matter – just a guy who’s gonna fix – or maybe it’s replace? – their water heater…for some reason.

“So where’s the heater?” the not-contractor-maybe-plumber asks.

“Uhh…” Eddie hesitates, and thank Christ, Moe appears at the top of the stairs.

“Basement,” she says, “Anode rod was replaced three years ago but the rest of it’s been there since we moved here in ‘04.”

The guy launches into a whole water heater spiel, and Eddie realizes halfway through he’s not trying to engage with Moe at all. He’s directing it all at Eddie as if Eddie is hearing anything more than Charlie Brown-esque phone call mumbling. He concludes with a question about…something related to tanks maybe? Or maybe it was tankless. Eddie has no idea. Moe answers it because she knows what the hell this guy is talking about, but still this asshole is looking at Eddie for confirmation.

“Dude, I dunno why you're looking at me,” Eddie tells him, and then he points at Moe, “My daughter works on airplanes. I write books. I'm telling you – you're better off listening to her.”

[planetpedri]

Can you do a Jobe x reader with best friends to lovers please? I love your writing so much!!

(You) on my arm — Jobe Bellingham.

Pairing: Jobe Bellingham x Fem!Reader

Summary: Mutual pining between you and your best friend had never seemed like a possibility until it all comes out in the most sickeningly sweet way.

Word count: 1.09k

Disclaimer/s: mentions of drinking & a wedding ( reader nor jobe are intoxicated ) + fluff

A/N: oh i’m going insane

When Jobe asked you to be his date to his cousins wedding, you accepted it instantly. Any time to be with him was time worth spent. The wedding was floral and summer themed, so Jobe had brought you dress shopping. You picked out two options, in which you couldn’t choose between. So instead of forcing you to pick, he insisted on buying them both. He had told you, “you look gorgeous in both, i’ll buy them.”

You had blushed at the compliment and shook your head. “They are expensive..” But he took them from your grasp and purchased them anyways.

Now, as you walked inside the venue together, arm in arm, Jobe looked down at you, an adoring smile on his face. Your cheeks flushed instantly, “sorry, is there something on me?”

Jobe chuckled, shaking his head. “No, no. It’s nothing..” He trailed off, swallowing hard before continuing, “you look, uhm, you look pretty, by the way.”

Your smile couldn’t possibly be wider, your cheeks hurting as you tried to suppress it. Your gaze flickers to the grass, “thank you.” You practically whispered it, your stomach fluttering at his words.

Throughout the night, Jobe had reluctantly left your side. You’d pressured him to go out and be with his family, insisting you were okay being by yourself.

So, you sat back in your chair, the leftover warmth of the evening sun keeping you comfortable. A glass of wine in your hand that you hadn’t touched, and a piece of cake sitting untouched on the table beside you.

Jobe was only a few dozen feet away, laughing at something his cousin said. His dimple was on full display, and your heart stammered at the sight. You couldn’t explain how that small feature made you feel, but it was the same way you felt when watching the sun set across the water at your family home on the coast. It was the closest thing to home that you could see every day.

Your best friend looks away from his cousin, his eyes landing on you. You stiffen when you realize he’d caught you staring. Jobe flashes a quick smile your way, forcefully tearing his eyes away when his cousin swatted at his arm.

By the time the wedding and the after party was over, Jobe and you had left. His car was filled with the soft sounds the heater warming it, and music playing quietly in the background. Jobe’s fingers tapped the steering wheel, like he had something to say, but was too nervous.

“Something on your mind?” You ask, head resting against the back of the seat, turned toward him. You examined his side profile closely, looking for any clues as to what he was feeling.

Jobe’s Adam’s apple bobs in his throat. “Did you have fun tonight?” He was changing the subject, so you knew he was hiding something.

“Yeah, did you?”

The boy only nods, sending you a quick, reassuring smile. “Good, i’m glad.”

A long beat of silence passes before you speak again. “So, are you going to tell me what you’re thinking about.. or?”

Jobe shakes his head. “Yeah, no. It’s nothing, really. I promise.” His eyes focus in on the road, distracting himself from your heavy gaze.

“Liar.” You chuckle, “come on, you tell me everything!”

He shifts uncomfortably in his seat, the road lamps turning his face a warm shade of orange every time they passed. “Not everything.” He quips, using humor to hide the edge in his voice.

Your eyebrows pull together, clear confusion flickering across your expression. “Huh? What are you talking about? What have you not told me?”

Jobe lets out a short breath, the wheel tapping growing more consistent. “It’s nothing. I swear.”

“That’s like, the fifth time you’ve said that. So, it’s clearly something.” You persist, desperate to understand what your best friend was hiding from you. He’d never not told you something, so this was beginning to get on your nerves.

“Can we talk about this when i’m not driving?” He huffs, “please? Just drop it right now?”

You do just that. Letting silence envelop the vehicle. But you swore, the second you be walked you up to your apartment, you will bring it up.

And so you did. As you unlocked your apartment door, you looked back to Jobe. “Speak and be heard?” You open the door, motioning for him to step inside.

He laughs quietly, head dipping down to hide his face. “You’ve always been persistent.” His voice holds a teasing tone as he walks toward the living room.

“That’s my best quality, you’ve said it before.” You point out, shutting the door behind you. “So, what’s on your—“

“You.” He cuts you off, stopping you in your tracks. “It’s you, you’re on my mind.”

Licking your lips, you let out a quick breath, not amused, just… confused. “What? Why?”

His hands are shoved into his pockets and he continues to avoid your eyes as he speaks. “I haven’t told you everything, because I don’t want to ruin what we have.” His explanation was weak, but you understand.

Your heart thumps harshly in your chest. “Oh… oh Jobe…” You sigh out quietly. “I—“

“I don’t want this to mess things up,” he cuts you off, again. “I care about you, I care about this friendship, and i’m okay with loving you in a way that doesn’t put us at risk.”

A small smile pulls at your lips. “You wouldn’t ruin anything, Jobe.” You walk the few feet toward the avoidant brunette. “If it helps… Everything you feel, I probably feel ten times deeper.”

Jobe’s head snaps up, his eyes finding yours. A clear look of relief on his face. “I find that extremely hard to believe.” He laughs, “I don’t think that’s possible.”

You chuckle, “whatever helps you sleep at night.” You’re a foot away, gazing up at him through thick eyelashes. His breath hitches in his throat at the sight.

He whispers your name, tenderly and full of emotion. “I love you.”

“And I love you.” You hum, a smile on your face.

Jobe hesitantly brings his hands up to cup your cheeks, his thumbs brushing the blush that had taken over your cheeks. “May I, Jobe Bellingham, kiss you?” He teases, eyes flashing with amusement.

“Yes, Jobe Bellingham, you may.” You giggle, rolling your eyes. Within seconds, if even that, his lips are pressing to yours. It’s delicate and sweet, full of every emotion you’d both denied each other for so long, too long.

Likes , comments , and reblog’s are all appreciated. Let me know if you’d like to be tagged in any of my future posts <3

DTS , @halfwayhearted @spidybaby !

[loudruinsnightmare]

How to Choose the Best Geyser for Your Home

How to Choose the Best Geyser for Your Home can be a daunting task, especially with the myriad of options available in the market. A geyser, or water heater, is an essential appliance that provides hot water for daily needs, including bathing, cleaning, and cooking. Choosing the right geyser involves considering various factors such as capacity, energy efficiency, type, and safety features. In this comprehensive Home Geyser Guide, we will provide Expert Geyser Tips to help you make an informed decision. Ram Services and Sales is committed to helping you find the perfect water heater for your home. For more details, visit Ram Services and Sales.

Understanding the Basics of Home Geysers

What is a Geyser?

A Home Water Heater, commonly known as a geyser, is an appliance that heats water for domestic use. Geysers can be powered by electricity, gas, or solar energy, and come in various sizes and capacities to suit different household needs.

Read More: https://ramservicesandsales.com/2024/07/23/how-to-choose-the-best-geyser/

[oceansprompts]

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[text] people have fetishes

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[text] This forced open my third eye and I saw the devil

[text] I'm like a child in line for the newest fucked up disney ride

-

[text] That's just all fucking sorts of fucked up

[text] Why are we here? To suffer? Every other day I get messages that cause pain

[text] In the department of old man fucking, we've got you beat.

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[text] You left your left your underwear at my place.

[text] Don't you dare put this on Facebook.

[text] My brother in Christ you're being haunted

[text] I want to wring you like a wet towel and slap you against a wall

[text] The mind is weak but the body is funky

[text] I'm a zombie the law can't stop me.

[text] Jealous of my massive honkers

[text] We left you to die to play minecraft

[text] She would never ever take away one of these stupid fucking hats

[text] I puked all over the Uber driver's backseat.

[text] I just took a screenshot of that and posted it to Reddit

[text] You said you'd be right back and it's been months.

[text] Can't we talk about this face to face?

[text] Yeah, you'll come learn I just have a thing for milk

[text] Why did you like one of my pics from 2014?

[text] Now's as good a time as any to exchange nudes.

[text] Why would you send me an eggplant emoji?

[text] I write five paragraphs, pouring my heart out, and all you reply with is k?!

[text] Who would dare to lie on the internet?

[text] When I die, please delete all my shit off the internet

[text] He's so hot, I briefly started texting like a straight person

[text] And because I'm god and I've decided that; no, in fact, I'm not done.

-

[text] I know you love bloopy reggae jams, now is not the time.

[text] You better not be standing catatonic in your room again.

[text] God has abandoned his children but unfortunately for you I pay child support and I will smite thee.

[text]: My neighbor just told me he can fix my water heater for 50 bucks. I’m skeptical.

[text]: Do you have any idea how much it costs to buy apples? I paid 10 dollars for 6.

[text]: I mean, I wouldn’t say I have a problem with buying Squishmallows..

[text]: Hey, so you know how you told me no dog? *sends pic* I don’t do well with no’s.

[text] Stuart Little is a bitch and Remy could take him any day.

[text]: My roommate just said that Lola Bunny is hot. I’m moving out.

[text]: Hey I posted that vid of you drunk, singing Ariana Grande, wearing all black and people said not to do it again. Sorry.

[text]: Do you think the price is ever right? Like, I feel like it’s not.

[text]: I booped your nose. Boop the last five people you texted or–nothing happens really.

[text]: I’m actually in the ER and it’s a long story that involves Best Day Ever from spongebob.

[text]: I fucking hate you–wait you’re not my ex. Who are you?

[text]: You ever ask yourself if birds see a bee and just go ‘wow a bee’? im high.

[text]: sometimes all i think about is–sour patch kids. bet you thought it was you.

[text]: I love you—not as much as I love my dog. But still a lot!

[text]: I found a cat on the way home and now it’s mine. But it hates my guts so this should be fun.

[text]: I have questions about the marvel cinematic universe…how long do you have?

[text]: why do donald duck and winnie the pooh not have to wear pants but other people do?

[text]: Hey you know that show floor is lava? I may have turned the apartment into that..this isn’t a joke, btw. the floor is sticky.

[text]: I bought too much soap off etsy and now I don’t know what to do with it…I smell like Captain America.

[text]: On a scale of one to ten, how many drinks would you need to sleep with me? This isn’t a tiktok trend…or it is.

[roachesrule]

PICKLE HEADCANONS.🦖

____________________________________

I went on a 2 mile walk today I am in pain dude😭 but I thought about this a lot so ENJOY.😤

TW: jealous behavior, the smallest most micro amount of violence. (It’s not descriptive.).

____________________________________

-So I think that pickle chooses who his “mate”? Is.

-So you’ll have to catch his eye. And make him interested.

-And if you do peak his interest.. be prepared to have the MOST clingiest man on earth.

-He will throw a whole ass tantrum if your gone for 0.001 seconds.

-LOOOTTSS OF CUDDLING.

-he will smother you.

-and he’s like a human heater.

-so be prepared to COOK.

-buy a bunch of blankets

-he’s a primitive man.

-so his instincts tell him to make a “nest”. (Aka a bunch of blankets thrown all over your bed)

-atleast it’s comfy 🤷‍♀️

-if you’re like me and like collecting random stuff (cool rocks,bones,jewelry etc.)

-let’s just say your collection will double in size.

-the first time he saw your reaction to the rock he found and gave to you he fell in love.

-and then he began to give you random stuff he finds.

-baths. He loves baths.

-especially when you take them with him.

-he could stay in the water for HOURS. DAYS EVEN.

-so take him swimming often.

-also if you like walks.

-take him on walks.

-he will run around every where and find the most random stuff. (Which he gives to you ofc.)

-if your walking near a body of water he will comeback to you absolutely SOAKED. (And then shake off the water on you.)

-also if you get tired he will carry you.

-there will also be a lot of scientist showing up to your home to check on pickle.

-also random fighters who obviously want to fight pickle. (Which you just say no and slam the door on them.)

-also you’re probably gonna move to the middle of nowhere

-so pickle can be closer to nature and feel more comfortable.

-and so he doesn’t hurt anyone.

-pickle can get VERY jealous.

-in his eyes you are his.

-he “owns” you practically.

-sometimes when fighters show up at your door they’ll flirt with you thinking they showed up at the wrong place.

-and they obviously didn’t cause when they take a quick glance behind you they’ll be met with pickles glaring eyes.

-and then swiftly be met with pickles fist in their face.

-communication with pickle is obviously hard.

-so if you do want to communicate with pickle.

-you’ll have to communicate through body language.

-and maybe. JUST MAYBE.

-you’ll be able to teach him sign language.

-pets. You might wanna get rid of them.

-pickle doesn’t understand the concept of a “pet”

-so when he sees you cuddled up with your pet he’ll get jealous and see the pet as competition.

-also if you have a pet rodent and it mysteriously went missing.

-he ate it.

____________________________________

Ok I think I’m done now. I hope you liked it and if you want more PLEASE SEND ME A REQUEST!!❤️

[kneelingshadowsalome]

What would König do/be like when Engel is on her period?

König doesn’t know much about periods, he never had proper sex education in school. You could show him an old ad about menstrual products where the blood is somehow blue, and he’d buy it and simply think it’s some girl thing.

So when your period arrives, the first thing he notices is that you’re not that willing to have sex with him. Or you downright refuse to have sex with him. The sentence ‘It’s that time of the month’ repeats in his head until he connects the dots and realizes that this is it. This is it now, he’s sharing his life with a fertile female and now it’s that time of the month. Right!

He would still try to coax you to have some soft, gentle sex because hey, he’s not afraid of blood. He knifes people every month, sometimes every week; blood is spilled, that’s his specialty. But if you’re grumpy and in pain, dismiss him and tell him to get you a heated water bottle instead or grab some pads from the store, his brain stops working for a moment.

Wait – so he’s needed in some other way here?

König to the rescue, then, but he won’t send you a picture from the pad aisle of the store with a question “What pussy size do you wear”, no, he’s not that easy going. He grabs one of each, and comes home with a plastic bag full of different products and asks if these will do. Then he gets you painkillers and a heater and a glass of water and chocolate and delivers them to you like a steadfast soldier.

Doesn’t understand you want cuddles and his body heat and some of those silly, adorable things he says, until you ask him to kindly come to the bed and hug you. And even then, König thinks you want him to be naked because cuddling usually happens after sex! He’s simply like a dog who’s been conditioned to not wear clothes when pressed against you.

So you roll your eyes when he comes to the bed, naked as can be, all his goodies hanging out and a stupid little grin on his face. He may forget his socks on sometimes because he’s so eager to get next to you so he can suffocate you with his bear hugs. Good luck trying to ignore the swelling, throbbing erection in your back as he pulls you into a cuddle...

And lord have mercy if he reads somewhere that sex can alleviate period pain. Starts to take it as the gospel truth that it *does* work anytime, anywhere, with all women, and so he tries to offer his dick as some kind of medicine for your cramps. Then sulks if you say it’s not that simple :(

[jupitersolar]

Energy-Efficient Water Heater The Benefits of Going for Green Energy

Introduction:

If you're looking to save energy and reduce your carbon footprint, an energy-efficient water heater is a great place to start. Traditional water heaters

can be one of the biggest energy users in your home, accounting for up to 30% of your total energy costs . By switching to an energy-efficient water heater

, you can not only save money on your utility bills, but also contribute to a more sustainable future.Buy the best solar water heater from Jupiter Solar ,

www.jupitersolars.in

.

How Does an Energy-Efficient Water Heater Work?

An energy-efficient water heater works by using advanced technology to heat water in a more efficient way than traditional models. Energy-efficient water heaters come in various types, such as tankless, heat pump, and solar water heaters.Each type has its own unique features and benefits, but all solar water heaters are designed to use less energy to heat water and reduce the carbon footprint.

Benefits of an Energy-Efficient Water Heater

   Lower energy bills: One of the biggest benefits of an energy-efficient water heater is that it can help you save money on your utility bills. By using less energy to heat water, you can reduce your energy costs and keep more money in your pocket.Buy solar water heater contact Jupiter Solar, www.jupitersolars.in .

   Reduced carbon footprint: Energy-efficient water heaters are designed to use less energy, which means they produce fewer greenhouse gas emissions. By using an energy-efficient water heater, you can help reduce your carbon footprint and do your part to protect the environment.

   Longer lifespan: Energy-efficient water heaters are built to last, with many models lasting up to 20 years or more. In the long term, this implies that you will spend less money on repairs and replacements.

   Consistent hot water: Energy-efficient water heaters are designed to provide hot water on demand, which means you won't have to wait for the water to heat up like you would with a traditional water heater.

Choosing the Right Energy-Efficient Water Heater for Your Home

When choosing an energy-efficient water heater for your home, there are several factors to consider, including your budget, the size of your household, and your hot water usage. Tankless water heaters are a great option for smaller households with low to medium hot water usage, while heat pump and solar water heaters are better suited for larger households with higher hot water usage.

Conclusion: An energy-efficient water heater is a smart investment for any homeowner looking to save money on their utility bills and reduce their carbon footprint. With a range of options available, it's easy to find a water heater that meets your needs and fits your budget. So why wait? Make the switch to an energy-efficient water heater today and start enjoying the benefits of going green!Choose energy efficient solar heater contact Jupiter Solar, www.jupitersolars.in .

[fanficimagery]

The Mikaelson Upgrade

When Elijah sends his sister to check on you during a harsh Winter, the Mikaelsons move you in with them.

Words: 7.4K  Author’s Note: So, I thought this was so good, but when I started editing it, I realized it was terrible lmao. But I need something to post, and this is the only completed thing I had. Sorry. 

With a basket half full of non-perishables and a case of water, you're standing on the opposite side of the grocery store and staring at their small selection of home hardware in hopes of finding something to weatherize your small apartment even further than it already was.

The central heat was out so you're going to be forced to use space heaters and you'd already glued some thin strips of foam all around your doorways to keep the drafts of winds out. This was only going to be your second winter in the apartment so you knew it could get cold, but this winter was predicted to be an extremely cold one and you wanted to be prepared.

The windows weren't the best insulated, so when you heard the trick about bubble wrap being plastered to the windows to help keep the heat in, you figured it was worth a shot. But as you stare at the prices of the different sized rolls, you sigh and realize you might just have to pile all your blankets atop you instead.

"Miss YLN?"

Your name being uttered startles you from your mental musings and you turn to the source. You stand a little taller at the striking figure looking so out of place in the hardware aisle. "Elijah! Hi," you sheepishly grin at him. "How are you?"

His lips twitch. "I'm doing well. And yourself?" He wonders. "I couldn't help but realize you looked quite lost in thought."

Your cheeks burn in embarrassment, but you chuckle nonetheless. "I was trying to determine whether or not it was worth it to buy the bubble wrap."

Elijah looks at the overly large rolls of wrap. "And pray tell what you would need so much bubble wrap for?"

"Winter is coming, Mr. Mikaelson, and I am merely a fragile human." He still doesn't get what you mean, so you elaborate. "I heard bubble wrap on the windows can help keep the cold out. I'm desperate."

"Ah. I see."

It doesn't look like he quite gets it, but you don't call him out on it. Instead, you say, "But I think it's probably cheaper to just hibernate under my blankets."

As you start to push your basket away, Elijah follows. "What about your parents? Surely you could stay with them during this harsh winter."

"Nah." You shake your head. "We're on shaky terms at the moment. My dad barely wanted to give me extra money for groceries, so I rather stay in my shitty apartment than live in a tense atmosphere."

From the corner of your eye you see Elijah looking at you, but you keep your own gaze forward. Then when you come to the checkout lane, he leaves you with, "If you need anything, my siblings and I are only a call away."

"Thanks, Elijah." You glance at him with a small smile. "Say hello to Rebekah and Niklaus for me, will you?"

"I will. Good evening, Miss YLN."

The first night of the winter storm is brutal. Within hours the temperature dropped drastically and the wind howled. Several feet of snow was predicted and your college professors all emailed that classes had been temporarily canceled due to the storm.

You tacked up tarps over your front door and back door, and even the front windows to your living room. You had unplugged every kitchen appliance you knew you weren't going to use and stowed them away, plugging in a small space heater that you left running on the empty kitchen counter. You had one heater in your bedroom that you only used when you slept, another heater in the bathroom that you only turned on before you showered, and another heater running in the living room where you spent most of your time.

All in all, what was once your favorite season is now something you desperately want to hurry up and be over with.

On the third day, you're trembling under three blankets debating whether or not it was worth it to get up and make yourself something to eat.

And just when you've decided that a nap sounds really good, there's a knock on your front door.

You quietly groan but refuse to get up.

Another knock sounds.

"If you're of the immortal population and friendly, then just walk in. It's too cold to get up," you mutter.

You hear the door creak open and the tarp crinkle as it's moved. "What the bloody hell is this?" You huff a laugh at Rebekah's disdain. "Honestly, YN, don't you ever listen?"

"Hmm?"

"Elijah told us about your situation. Klaus has had his minions watching your place-"

"Aw. He's had his hybrids out in this cold? What a dick."

"-and they called to inform us there wasn't much movement in here anymore. We're really worried."

"M'fine, Rebekah."

"You're not fine. You're bloody freezing!"

"Well, it is Winter, and I am only human."

Rebekah grumbles and you can only imagine the face she's making as you hear her footsteps walking around your apartment. "'Lijah said you didn't enjoy your apartment and now I see why." She sighs. "I don't see why he just doesn't make you part of the family already and move you in."

You tense and slowly pull the blankets down from covering your head. "What?"

She glances at you, feigning innocence. "What?"

"You just said-"

"No, I didn't."

"I could've sworn you said-"

"I said no such thing."

You narrow your eyes at your friend and she smiles a little too big. Then softly rolling your eyes, you cover your head once more to preserve your body heat under the blankets. "Well you've seen with your own eyes that I'm fine. I'm just preserving my body heat under the blankets."

The blankets are suddenly ripped from you and you whine. "Get up. Packs your bags. You're coming with me."

"Rebekah, no." You weakly grab for your blankets, only to be denied. "Just let me go to sleep."

She scoffs. "I'm afraid that if you go to sleep, you won't wake up again. Now go pack or I'll have the hybrids do it for you."

Your eyes sting with tears and a lump forms in your throat as you stare at your friend's no-nonsense expression, but you manage to keep your emotions in check as you pull yourself into a seated position. Then very slowly, you wrap a blanket around your shoulders and go do as you're told.

But you're so cold that Rebekah ends up doing everything for you as you sit on the edge of your bed. Your thoughts end up drifting off as Rebekah moves around you, your eyelids feeling heavier and heavier. Eventually you feel yourself slump over, but you're so tired that you can't open your eyes.

You do, however, hear your friend swear before she's talking to someone else. Most likely on the phone, your mind supplies. Then you're being lifted and moved so suddenly, only to be placed down in a seat. You're cold all over again, but then you hear a car heater get turned on full blast.

"Hold on, YN. I'll get you home and you'll feel better soon."

. . . .

When you're thrust back into consciousness, the first thing you hear is a crackling fire. Your eyelids flutter open and you find yourself in an unfamiliar room. Your confusion momentarily overrides your sheer terror at not knowing where you're at, but then the soothing baritones of a familiar voice instantly calms you.

"I thought I made it clear that you were to call should you need anything." You turn your head to find Elijah sitting by your bedside. "Rebekah doesn't think you'd have made it another night had you stayed in your apartment. She said your heart rate slowed down while she was packing your clothes and you passed out. You should have called."

You know Elijah is not scolding you, he's just stating facts, but hearing it so plainly scares you. Your bottom lip trembles as your eyes fill with tears and you quickly cover your eyes with your hands before the tears can fall. "I'm sorry." You sniffle. "I just- I didn't-" You shakily exhale and try to swallow down the lump in your throat.

A hand gently wraps around your right wrist, tugging your hand from your face. "It's fine. You're here now."

Your heart starts to pick up speed at his proximity, he having leaned forward. "I didn't think it'd be this hard," you murmur.

"Didn't think what would be so hard?"

"Being an adult." You sniffle some more. "I took a lot of stuff for granted while I was under my parent's roof and now? Struggling to make ends meet while being a college student absolutely blows."

Elijah's lips twitch at the sight of your pout. His eyes twinkle in the firelight and your breath hitches when he raises your hand to his mouth, his lips pressing a kiss to your knuckles. "Well now you're under my roof. Sleep. And when you wake up, this room has its own private bath with all the hot water you can use up and all the food you could want down in the kitchen."

"That sounds nice." Your blinks get longer and longer until you eventually can't keep your eyes open anymore. "'Lijah?" You sleepily slur.

"Yes?"

"You're my favorite Mikaelson. Don't tell the others."

Right before the void takes you, you hear muffled laughter. "I won't. You have my word."

The next time you wake up, you remember where you are and hurry to the windows to look outside. What you see is beautiful, pure white everywhere, but it's also a bit scary because the longer you look at the snow, the quicker Elijah's words come back to haunt you.

Rebekah doesn't think you'd have made it another night had you stayed in your apartment.

This is the most snow you've ever seen in your life and you're suddenly really grateful for nosy friends. As you turn around to face away from the too white picture, you see an opened door leading to a bathroom. Elijah's other words float to the forefront of your mind and you immediately look around for your bags. But finding none anywhere leads you to scope out the dresser drawers and sure enough your clothes have all been folded and put away.

Shaking your head and what was no doubt Rebekah's doing, you gather a change of clothes and head into the bathroom. It's one of the most luxurious bathrooms you've ever seen, but then again these are vampires who are over a thousand years old. Of course they'd splurge to have only the best.

Once you locate the towels and realize the shower stall has everything you'd need, you turn on the hot water and strip the second you see steam rising.

The hot shower is absolute bliss and you almost don't want to get out once you're done. But other needs must be met when your stomach starts to grumble, so you get out and dress in a set of comfortable clothes that's both warm and presentable enough to be in the company of others.

When you eventually find your way to the kitchen, all three Mikaelson siblings are hanging around. Elijah is reading the newspaper, enjoying either a cup of coffee or tea, Rebekah is staring into the refrigerator, but Klaus is smirking directly at you.

"So Sleeping Beauty finally awakens."

"Very funny, Niklaus." You wrinkle your nose as you pass him, offering a small grin as you make your way towards Rebekah. You wrap your arms around her waist from behind, leaning the side of your face against her back. "Please tell me you guys have ramen? I want all the ramen in the world right now."

"We do. Do you want me to make you some?"

"I've got it. Just point me in the direction of the pots and ramen."

As you put a small pot of water to boil, you go through the cabinets to find some spices to season the ramen better. You pull out two slices of cheese from the refrigerator and then drop the noodles into water. You wait patiently for the noodles to become tender and then drain most of the water out. You add in all the seasoning before tossing the cheese atop the noodles, mixing it until it's all melted.

"That doesn't look like the ramen on the packaging," Rebekah says as she looks over your shoulder.

"Because when you're on a budget and your daily meals consist of ramen, you find ways to spruce it up," you muse. "Wanna try?"

"No, thank you."

"Elijah? Niklaus?" You then offer them some.

Elijah politely refuses whereas Klaus' nose wrinkles. "Smells foul, love."

"Really? It smells foul to the person who prefers munching on the hearts of those who betray him?" Klaus chuckles before quickly deciding to take his leave, claiming to have people to torment. Rebekah sighs and grumbles about going with him to make sure he doesn't get into too much trouble, and Elijah just grins from his place at the table. "Would you like some company?" You sheepishly ask.

"Please, be my guest."

Putting some noodles into a bowl, you grab a fork and then a bottled water from the refrigerator before setting it all down atop the table. Then pulling out your own seat, you sit cross legged before digging in.

At the first bite, you smile with your cheeks puffed out and happily wiggle in your seat.

Elijah chuckles. "Good?"

"Mhm." You twirl some more noodles on your fork before blowing on them and then shoving them into your mouth. With another groan, you grab a napkin to dab at your mouth before sipping your water. "I'm a pasta girl, in case you haven't noticed. I will try any pasta dish at least once and then repeatedly if I like it."

"Noted." Elijah smiles at you before his eyes fall back to the paper in his hands. After a moment, he asks, "So was the bedroom to your liking?"

"Yes! Thank you." You perk up a little, grinning. "I hadn't seen that room before, so I was a little confused when I woke up."

"I know. Your heart started to beat frantically before I spoke up."

"Ahh, the perks of being a vampire," you muse. Elijah chuckles and then the two of you fall into silence as he reads and you eat.

You finish your meal without any more interruptions and then walk over to the sink to wash your dishes.

"You know we have a dishwasher, correct?"

"Yes, but I like to do things by hand. Keeps me moving since I have no idea what to do here now that I'm not secluded to the couch for warmth."

"What about your classes?"

"Canceled." Turning off the water, you grab a towel to dry your hands. "Well, at least in-person classes had been canceled. Maybe I should check my email to make sure there are no online assignments that need to be completed."

"Yes, you wouldn't want to fall behind."

You blow a raspberry in his direction before leaving the kitchen and heading for your temporary room to collect your laptop to see if there's anything that needs to be completed.

On your third day with the Mikaelsons, you've taken over their library as you attempted to complete an essay one of your professors had assigned since the campus was still closed. Elijah consistently made appearances, grabbing a book and reading quietly as you researched and typed, and Klaus showed up occasionally to paint while you worked. Rebekah was the only one to drop in for minutes at a time, just long enough to make sure you took a break and gave your brain a rest.

You're reading through one of the many journals Elijah had hoarded from centuries ago when your cell phone dings with a text message. You ignore it, but then it dings again.

And again.

And again.

"Are you going to get that?" Elijah asks.

You startle at his voice, momentarily forgetting you weren't alone. "Yeah. I guess so." The text messages just keep popping up, one right after another, and you try to read them as quickly as you can. "What the-" You frown.

"What seems to be the problem?"

"I'm not sure. Caroline, Bonnie, and Matt.. they seem worried, I think," you tell him. "Each of them asking where I'm at and if I'm okay and-" Your cell ringing cuts you off. "My dad's calling." You quickly accept it. "Hello?"

"WHERE ARE YOU?!"

You flinch at the volume of his voice and even Elijah looks up from his book. "Dad? I'm- I'm at a friend's place. The apartment got too cold. Why? What's-"

"Your apartment is on fire!" Your head turns to quickly look at Elijah and he seems just as surprised as you. "We all thought you were inside. No one knew-" His voice cuts off with a sob.

"Dad, I'm okay. I'm fine." He continues to cry, and you do your best to console him. "How did a fire even start? I unplugged everything." You try to listen to your dad, but his blubbering is making no sense. But as you're on the phone with him, Klaus saunters into the room. As he passes you, you can't help but inhale deeply and then narrow your eyes. You know that smell. "Dad, let me call you back. I'll get to the apartment as soon as I can." You hang up and set your phone aside, leaning back into your seat with a sigh. "Niklaus, what did you do?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about, love."

You look at Elijah, exasperated. "I believe Miss YLN is talking about the fact that you smell like smoke after she just got a very frantic phone call from her father who didn't know if she was dead or alive because her apartment is currently up in flames."

Rebekah saunters in next, expression a little too smug.

"Rebekah, please tell me you didn't have a hand in this either?"

"Well, it's not like you'd move in here otherwise." Her smug expression falls. "We did you a favor."

"You made me homeless," you deadpan. Then glancing at Elijah, you ask, "Can you take me over there? I need to see the damage."

"Of course."

"YN, we didn't-"

"I assure you we meant no harm," Klaus says. "We just thought-"

"I know what you thought, but you could have literally talked to me about leaving my shitty apartment rather than burn it down." Rebekah looks put out that you're not thanking her, and Klaus doesn't look apologetic at all, but it still makes you assure both of them that you're not angry. "I'm not mad, I'm just-" You trail off, sighing. "Please tell me you at least took out all my valuables before you set everything ablaze?"

Rebekah scoffs. "We're not amateurs. I took anything that might have sentimental value, all your clothes and all your electronics out the first night I brought you here."

You shake your head, unable to help the twitch of your lips. "You guys have been alive way too long if you thought burning down my apartment was the best way to approach me with the idea of moving in here." The two troublesome Mikaelsons start to grin when they realize you're not truly upset with them. "Now when we get back, I want all the chicken nuggets and fries from McDonalds."

"But the closest McDonalds is about twenty minutes away," Rebekah says.

"Then drive fast." Finally standing, you look to Elijah. "Ready?"

He nods. "After you."

. . . .

The street you live on- er, used to live on- is packed with police cars, an ambulance, and two different fire trucks. The street has been taped off, but after Elijah parks and the two of you approach the officers keeping nosy individuals away, you tell them that it's your apartment up in flames and they let the two of you pass.

Across the street from your burning apartment, your dad stands there with more police officers. You make a beeline for him, accepting his hug and giving the police your statement. Elijah stands by your side as you answer everything you're asked, giving his own statement to back up your claim that you had left the apartment days earlier.

When the questions are done and over with, you're left to helplessly watch as the fire devours the place you've known as home for the last two years. When part of the roof collapses and you flinch, Elijah tucks you under an arm and turns you so your face is pressed against his chest.

"Miss?" Elijah releases his hold on you and nudges you so you turn around. There's a firefighter addressing you. "Are you the owner?"

"I rent," you tell him. "The landlord is elderly. They wouldn't be out here."

"Oh. Okay. Um, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but I think the house is gonna be a total loss. I'm sorry."

"Figures." You sigh and then paste on a smile. "Thank you."

Just as you turn back towards Elijah, you hear your father sigh next. "Well, I guess this means you'll be moving back in until you find another decent apartment."

"Wow, dad, don't sound too enthused now," you deadpan.

He glowers at you before looking back at the dwindling fire, shaking his head. "Your mother won't be too happy that she'll have to put all her sewing supplies into storage, but I guess we'll just have to make do."

"You know what-"

"Mr. YLN," Elijah smoothly steps in, offering your dad a hand to shake. "I'm Elijah Mikaelson. It's nice to finally meet you, sir." Your dad seems to stand a little taller, puffing out his chest as he takes Elijah in before shaking his hand. "I just want to assure you that you and your wife have nothing to worry about. My family and I will happily take in YN. My sister thinks of her fondly and we have more than enough space for her to stay with us."

"Mikaelson, huh? Your family built that fancy mansion a few years back, right?"

Your eyes roll as you groan, "Dad."

But Elijah only smirks. "Yes, sir."

"Hmm." Your dad huffs. But seeing this as the perfect outcome, he then says, "Well if there's anything my daughter needs to attribute to, I'm sure I can offer some-"

"There's no need. All expenses for your daughter will be covered by my family and I."

You can see the relief obviously wash over your dad and it pains you just a little that he so easily let someone else take care of you. You're pretty sure if one of your older siblings needed help, your parents would move Heaven and Earth for them. But for you? Apparently, your old room was just too much to ask for. "And on that note, Elijah and I will be going." You glance at your apartment, swallowing down the sadness threatening to overwhelm you. "There's nothing left for me here anyway."

Suddenly reaching for Elijah's hand, you start to tug him in the direction of his car. You wave at your dad over your shoulder, barely uttering a goodbye to him.

And then once you're in the quiet of Elijah's car, he asks, "Are you okay?"

"Not really, but what can I do?" You shrug. "Can you just drive? I don't want to be here anymore."

"Of course."

He turns the heater up in the car when he hears your teeth chatter, and you wrap your jacket around you more tightly. You let the warmth wash over you and allow your eyes to close, only opening them when he quietly tells you that you're back home.

Home.

Your eyes snap open as you stare up at the Mikaelson mansion.

Home.

You giggle in disbelief as your mind tries to comprehend how once you were enemies with the Mikaelson family, and now here you sit in the company of one as he calls his home your home as well.

Home.

"I guess this is home now, huh?"

"Yes."

Your lips twitch in amusement. "Then let's get inside. Rebekah and Niklaus better have my chicken nuggets ready for me to devour."

Elijah chuckles before using his vampire speed to exit his side of the car, only to end up on your side to open the door for you. He offers you a hand so you can easily climb on out as he grins at you. "And fries. You can't forget those."

"It'd be blasphemous to forget the salty, potato-y goodness which means I can almost guarantee Niklaus forgot them because he likes to see me suffer." You sigh sadly with a shake of your head. "Do you think the waterworks will get me dessert?"

"It's worth a shot. Shall we?"

As Elijah then offers you the crook of his arm, you hook your arm with his. "We shall."

As it turns out, Niklaus or Rebekah didn't forget the french fries. The table was laden with multiple boxes of nuggets and cartons of fries, and when Rebekah produced the small fried apple pies, you nearly cried.

Nearly.

The snow eventually tapers off as the temperatures settle back into what they usually are around this time of year, and classes resume in person. You have no issue driving yourself to and from school, but when your car starts to rattle and the vampires in your life urge you to take it into the shop, Elijah has no issue driving you to and from the college campus.

And though you were skeptical about living with the Mikaelsons in the beginning and had to deal with conversation after conversation from Bonnie and Caroline, you find yourself enjoying the freedom that comes with not having to worry about bills or what your next meal is going to be.

In fact, you get so comfortable that more often than not, Klaus or Rebekah find you cuddled up next to Elijah as you read a book or with your legs draped over his lap as he reads and you work on something on your laptop. They always shoot you knowing grins, but you wave them off and throw all your focus into your assignments.

One morning, as you're making yourself some breakfast, Rebekah saunters into the kitchen.

"Oatmeal and berries?" She asks.

"Mhm. Want some?"

"No, thanks." You take your bowl to the island bar where your laptop sits open on a document you're meant to be reading and take a seat on a stool. Before you can even get the first spoonful of warm gooeyness into your mouth, you hear Rebekah ask, "So where's my brother?"

You freeze with the spoon halfway to your mouth. "First of all, you have two brothers. And second, how should I know? I'm not either of their keepers."

"Elijah, darling. Do keep up."

"Oh." You shove the spoon of oatmeal into your mouth and shrug. "I dunno. He said something about meeting with someone and that he'd see me later."

"Mhmmm." You can feel the heat of her stare boring into the side of your head and busy yourself momentarily with your oatmeal and berries. "Can I ask you something?"

"You're gonna ask it either way, so yeah. Go ahead."

"Why Elijah and not Niklaus?" You inhale in surprise, choke on a berry, and immediately reach for your coffee. Only that seems to be a mistake as the drink is still too hot and you end up spluttering the coffee and oatmeal down the front of your shirt. Rebekah laughs.

"Goddammit, Rebekah!"

"It's a simple question."

"Yeah, I know, but-" You take the napkins she's offering you and sigh when you see your shirt is stained after dabbing away the mess.

"Well?"

"Well, what?"

"Why Elijah and not Niklaus?" She asks again.

When you glance up at her, you see her amused grin and know she won't let this go. You're pretty sure the crush you have on Elijah is obvious to everyone under the Mikaelson roof, but Elijah's polite enough to not bring attention to it, so you settle for telling her the truth. "Don't get me wrong, both your brothers are smoking hot."

"But…?"

"But Niklaus is too chaotic for me. It's fun to hear about the drama he stirs up, but not so much when you're dragged into it. And Elijah… Elijah has this calm aura to him and can hold a serious conversation that doesn't devolve into murderous schemes unless it's to protect someone he holds near and dear. I just- I don't know. I'm more at ease around Elijah."

"Well, that's harsh, love." You freeze, Rebekah smirks, and you slowly turn to find both brothers standing there under the archway. Klaus' expression matches Rebekah's whereas Elijah is smiling a little guiltily. Knowing you were set up to admit that aloud, you sigh and go back to your oatmeal, but not before glaring at Rebekah. "I hate you."

"Pure lies," she muses. "And you're welcome."

"That's enough, Rebekah," Elijah calls out. "Let us leave Miss YLN be while she finishes her breakfast and her work. I'm sure you have locals to terrorize."

Rebekah rolls her eyes with a sigh and your lips twitch as she reluctantly leaves you be. You glance over your shoulder at Klaus, only for him to wiggle his eyebrows at you before following Rebekah.

And then when you look at Elijah, he grins. "Shall we talk when you're ready?"

"What if I'm never ready?"

"You will be."

"No need to sound so smug."

"How can I not be when I can hear your heartbeat race?" Your face starts to flame. "Or easily detect when the blood rushes through your veins?"

"Okay, I get it." You shift nervously in your seat. "We'll talk soon, just not right now." Elijah nods. "Now get out of here before I demote you to Mikaelson #2."

"Now we all know that's a bold-faced lie." You narrow your eyes at his smirk. "But I will leave you be. Until then…"

As Elijah takes his leave, you heave a great sigh. With your heart racing and face feeling more than a little warm, you try your best to focus on finishing your food and the passage you're meant to be reading.

For a week, every time Elijah walks into a room that you're in, you can't help the way your heart speeds up. Every vampire in the house does their best to hide their amused smiles, but you see them nonetheless and stew in your embarrassment until you finally realize you have nothing to be embarrassed about.

Elijah knows of your attraction towards him and wants to speak of it rather than immediately turning you down. So, in your book, that's a positive sign that he feels the same.

Hopefully.

Then by the second week, you're back to sharing the library with Elijah as you work, and he reads. And it's during this week that you end up with your head resting on his thigh as you attempt to read a non-school related book, only to end up sighing as you let the book fall closed over your chest.

"So, vampirism…" You say, waiting until you know you have his attention. When he hums, your lips twitch. "What's your take on it?"

"What do you mean?"

"I've met some vampires who are all about vampirism and only have good things to say about becoming one, but I've also met vampires who completely hate what they are and the thought of creating more." You look up at him, shrugging. "I know you're completely fine with your existence and other vampires, but what's your take on me possibly becoming one?"

He tenses and immediately looks down to meet your gaze. "Is that- is that something you want?"

"What's the point in pursuing a relationship with a vampire if I'm human? I'll age, you won't."

"Would becoming a vampire solely be based on the fact whether or not we pursue a relationship?"

You snort. "No."

"No?"

"No." You sit up, but don't move too far. You turn so your body is angled towards the smartly dressed vampire you'd just been using as a pillow. "Elijah, I've been thinking about vampirism for a long time now. I've just been too chicken to ask for it."

"Why?"

"Healthcare is expensive." Elijah's expression slackens in surprise and you grin. "I'd like to live a life without worrying about throwing myself into debt just because I get an infection or need surgery."

"So, you'd want to become a vampire, not for the everlasting youth or powers or to date another vampire, but because you don't want to pay for healthcare?"

"Yep."

Elijah laughs. "Oh sweetheart, you are something else."

"Mhm. But no turning until after I've graduated. I don't want to attend classes and accidentally kill another student for annoying me."

"If that's what you wish, then we'll revisit this discussion later on down the line."

"Okay. But first I just need to see what I'm missing out on." Elijah must have been anticipating your next move because he merely smiles as you lean forward, one knee digging into the couch cushion as you then lean over him. Your hands gently grasp either side of his face so you can kiss him, and you quietly groan when he immediately grants your tongue entrance. His hands reach for your waist, guiding you towards him until you're perched on his lap. "Fuck."

You barely pull back just enough to catch your breath, your hands settling on his shoulders while his hand reaches up to trace the left side of your face. "Is your curiosity sated?"

"For now." You lean in to peck his lips once more and then pull back, reluctantly climbing off his lap. "Now I'm gonna go take a cold shower less I say something stupid and beg you to take me to bed."

He grins at you. "I see no issue with you begging."

"I'm sure you don't." You return his teasing grin. "But when our first time together happens, I want all of you. I don't want you holding back."

"Graduation is still a ways away," he muses. "Are you capable of that much restraint?"

You allow your gaze to look him up and down, and swipe your tongue across your bottom lip. Elijah smirks as you sigh wistfully and then you shake your head clear and head for the exit. "I'm gonna have to invest in a goddamn vibrator."

Elijah's laugh follows you all the way up the stairs.

As the months pass, you do your best to keep things calm between you and Elijah, but the tension between the two of you only continues to thicken. In fact, it isn't long before his siblings figure out something has happened. Klaus is the first to realize, but Elijah is a pro at redirecting the conversation and you only manage a whimper when his attention turns to you. And then when Rebekah picks up on what's going on around her, it isn't long until you cave and blurt out your entire conversation with Elijah, as well as the kiss.

Rebekah thinks it's cute that you're putting yourself through so much torture just so her brother can properly rail you into the mattress, and Klaus takes great pleasure in teasing the two of you.

But you hold strong, only slipping up here and there when Elijah looks just too good for you to resist, but never actually sleep with him. He takes what you give, chuckling when you whimper and groan when you have to walk yourself back to your room.

Graduation is then upon you and your family surprises you by showing up since you hadn't really spoken to any of them since your apartment burned to the ground. You're subjected to dinner with them, which means the Mikaelsons are subjected to dinner as well since you strongly urge them to tag along, and it's an all-around awkward night.

Your mother then manages to turn the dinner into a tense one by asking what kind of career you're going into with your chosen degree, and Elijah is quick to shut that conversation down by telling your mother you have a year to think on it since he has an all-expenses paid vacation planned for you after you've studied your ass off these last few years. That, in turn, leads to your mother scoffing and quietly berating you for riding your boyfriend's coattails, and Klaus stuns everyone by basically calling your mother a jealous cunt.

Graduation night ends with Elijah and Rebekah having to compel your family to forget the tense moments.

Days later you're surprised to learn that the vacation Elijah told your mother is actually real, and Rebekah helps you pack even though she won't be going on this trip with you- it's just you and Elijah.

Flying first class is an experience you'll never forget, nor the trip Elijah took care to plan so you could see the world and experience different cultures.

One Year Later

It's been a while since you've stepped foot in Mystic Falls and you're unsurprised that it's unchanged. Small towns are filled with people with small minds, and no one liked change when your town was as pretty as Mystic Falls.

Elijah opens your door when he parks in front of your home, and you take his hand as you climb out. Then leaning up, you press a kiss of thanks to his lips before moving past him.

"Happy to be home?" He asks.

"Yes. As much as I loved traveling the world with you, there's just something about my own bed that I was missing."

"Well, you're going to continue to miss it because you'll be moving into my room."

Your eyes roll fondly. "And you call me the impatient one."

"Yes, well…" Elijah steps right in front of you, tilting your head upward so his thumb drags your bottom lip from between your teeth. "Can you blame me?"

"Nope. I know I'm adorable."

Chuckling, he places another quick kiss to your lips. "That you are. Now let's get inside. I'll get some of Niklaus' associates to bring in our bags."

"I'm only agreeing with you right now because I want to see your siblings. Otherwise, I'd be grabbing my own bags."

"If you say so, sweetheart."

Stepping back, you practically skip to the front door and throw it open. "Honey, we're home!" You call out.

Your moment of happiness is interrupted when a hand is immediately wrapped around your throat, and you're slammed into a wall. It all happens within a split second and your eyes widen as you see Damon Salvatore hiss in your face, only to then find three very pissed off Mikaelson's at his back. "You won't heal Elena? Maybe you need a little motivation then." Damon growls, shaking you a little.

Your hands grasp at Damon's wrist, nails raking against the exposed skin there. "W-What?"

"Your new little family is refusing to help Elena," he sneers. "Maybe if their pet human is threatened, then maybe we'll get somewhere."

You make a show of being in discomfort with his hand around your neck before you cave and laugh. Klaus and Rebekah freeze, and Elijah loosens his stance as he slowly grins at you. "So, Elena decided to be a dumbass and now you want the Originals to clean up her mess? What'd she do now?"

"Got herself bitten by a little wolf," Rebekah hesitantly muses. "How are you-"

But Damon frowns as he quickly looks you up and down. "Why are you laughing?" He squeezes your throat a little tighter, but it merely causes your smile to grow.

"Because you underestimate me, Mr. Salvatore." Your smile vanishes just as quickly as you grab his wrist in your own grasp, snapping it backwards and sending the vampire to his knees. Then with a swift kick to his chest, you send him sailing across the room. "You underestimated me as a human and now you underestimate me as a vampire. Never put your hands on me again."

Damon is quick to speed to his feet, cradling his already healing limb as he stares at you in disgust. Rebekah and Klaus, however, look prouder than ever as Elijah walks up to your side, letting his fingers trace one side of your face before he kisses your forehead.

"So, you're a vampire now?" Damon huffs. "All that means is that when your guard dogs aren't around, I can torture you now without your pathetic little heart giving out."

"And that's where you're wrong." Using your newfound speed, you manage to make a dent in the wall where you shove Damon against before tossing him into the glass coffee table and shattering it. Then standing over him, you place your foot on his chest to prevent him from getting up. "You see, Elijah has always known I'd be a target for fools like you. So, when I turned, some of his friends who were looking for a favor from the noble Original made it so I also have the strength of an Original." You slowly smirk as reality sinks in for Damon. "So, you can come at me all you want, but I'll just end up putting you on your ass again and again and again."

He struggles to get out from under you, but you put more pressure on his chest to keep him in place. "Elena's your friend. You should want to help her!"

"Wrong. She stopped being my friend the moment her dumbass ended up sired to your sorry ass. Her messes are her own." You press down on his chest again until he groans and then speed back to Elijah's side where you end up tucked beneath his arm. Then glancing at Klaus, you smile sheepishly, "Sorry about the wall and table. I'll do my best to replace it."

Klaus' dimples are on full display before he lets his laugh echo around the room. Rebekah's tinkling laugh isn't too far behind. "Welcome to the family, love. And don't worry about the mess. Watching you throw around Damon was spectacular." You grin as you hear Damon huff and then Klaus turns to him. "Just this once, Salvatore. I'll help you just this once because YN has put me in a better mood. Any future bites and your doppelganger is dead."

"Fine. We'll take it."

As Klaus disappears with Damon, you turn to Rebekah who has her arms crossed over her chest and hip cocked to the side. "So how long did you last?"

"Three months."

Her eyebrow arches. "Only three?"

"I could have gone longer, but I might have goaded your brother."

"With what?"

"Rebekah, I don't think-"

You slowly smirk at her. "I told him I had this fantasy of him bending me over the railing at the top of the Eiffel Tower and he cracked. He made preparations for my turning almost as soon as we got back to our hotel."

"Okay that's enough." Elijah scoops you up just as his sister cackles and you find yourself being tossed on his bed a moment later as he crawls over you. As you grin up at him, he asks, "Did you have to share that with her?"

"Girls talk, handsome. Get used to it." You lean up, kissing him. "And besides, you're lucky Niklaus wasn't here."

"Rebekah will tell him."

"And he'll tease us until you and I decide to christen every surface in this room." You kiss again. "And the library." Another kiss. "And maybe even the kitchen."

"YOU WILL NOT BRING YOUR NAKED SELVES INTO THIS KITCHEN!" Rebekah's shout interrupts your final kiss, and you laugh as you fall back against the bed.

"Let him tease. He's the one who'll have to listen to us."

"AND ME!"

You giggle as Elijah sighs, lowering his body over you so he can rest his forehead against yours. "Maybe I should build another house for us."

"Absolutely not. I love you and I love your family. If we have to deal with them teasing us about our sex life, then so be it. It's not like they're so innocent themselves."

"You love me?"

"Always." You kiss him. "Now get up. I say the first place we christen is that fancy bathroom of yours."

Elijah is up within a split second, tugging you along.

Downstairs, Rebekah is fixing herself a mug of tea and blood when your giggles reach her ears. The giggles soon turn into a moan, and she grimaces. "Bloody hell. If I knew they were going to be this randy, I'd have invested in noise canceling headphones."

[nsfwitchy2]

I love my family so much but I wanna state for the record that if this was my house - if I woke up and the first thing I noticed was the heating was broken

I personally would’ve gone out and bought space heaters. Immediately. Not made breakfast first, not gotten dressed first, not tried to get in contact with 4 different relatives hoping they “know a guy” - I am walking my ass into Walmart in my pajamas to buy space heaters

And then I’m spending the rest of the day trying to figure out how to fix the heating

The heat in our house went off and everytime I propose the concept that having the heat go out when it’s 30 degrees outside is BAD and no I will not go get dressed because I’m not even coming out from under the blankets it’s 30 degrees in our fucking home - I am told it’s “not that bad” and I’m “over reacting”

So for the record if the heat doesn’t get fixed in some way today I’m renting a hotel room tonight and since our house is so “not that bad” I will rent it exclusively for myself and nobody else <3