#But that would also mean being homeless ig

[dandunn]

Bleh.

[foliosriot]

THE DRAIN ♱ CHAPTER TWO

noah sebastian x ofc (grey)

SUMMARY!!

the concrete jungle is incredibly dangerous and a scary place to live. but grey has made it her mission to provide whatever light and aid she can in such a dark place. even if it means catching the attention of someone at the top of the food chain.

WARNINGS!!

stalking if you squint ig. mentions of bl00d. brief mention of ab*se.

TAGS!!

@concretenoah @circle-with-me @malice-ov-mercy @somewhere-diamond @iknownothingpeople @cncohshit @lilhobgobbler @bngurngheart

masterlist. the drain masterlist.

It’s been about a week since Vivian discovered the note, and Grey has been panicking every moment of every day.

Every corner she turns she fears someone will reach out of the shadows and drag her away. She fears leaving her apartment, and even turning on the Angel’s Light every night like she is used to. She doesn’t want to make the target on her back even bigger.

But, as expected, the fear and panic is always drowned out by Grey’s need to care for the Concrete Jungle’s occupants. Her need to help as many people as she possibly can will always be stronger than her own terror or anxiety.

Even now, as she goes about her nightly routine by helping anyone who is drawn in by the comforting glow of the Christmas lights, Grey can’t help but feel like she is being watched. And the feeling isn’t coming from the last couple people resting on the fire escape. No, it’s coming from somewhere else. But from where, she can’t tell, as the night has taken hold of the city and darkness overwhelms everything in its wake.

“Make sure you find somewhere safe to sleep tonight.” Grey is currently helping wrap the arm of a boy who had sliced it open after jumping over a broken fence as he ran from his abuser. “But there is a shelter a few blocks that way if you’d rather do that, okay?”

The boy looks up at her, his fluffy orange-red hair falling into his eyes. Tear stains run all the way down his ruddy face and disappear under his jaw.

“Thank you, Angel,” the boy, Jace, murmurs in a broken voice.

“Oh, no, no need to thank me,” she replies with an awkward smile. The nickname has always rubbed her the wrong way for some reason. But still, she resists the urge to correct her patients who call her that, especially now. “This is what I love to do. I love helping others.”

Jace looks like he wants to say more but bites his tongue instead.

Grey finishes helping him and lets him go on his way with a plastic water bottle and a small bag that contains a granola bar, an apple, and a string cheese. He thanks her one more time before he shimmies his way down the fire escape, and hurries in the direction of the shelter Grey had mentioned.

The final patient of the night, Georgie, hobbles towards Grey. Georgie is one of her regulars, a homeless man in his fifties who happens to be one of the sweetest people Grey has ever had the pleasure to meet. He says he has a shelter of his own somewhere close by, but only comes to her when he struggles to find food for himself and his dog. His dog, Cleo, sleeps soundly at the foot of the fire escape.

“Hi, Georgie,” Grey greets him with a genuine smile. She reaches behind her to grab one of those little food bags, like she had just given to Jace. But she also fills another one of those bags with some dog food and a few chunks of chicken.

“Hiya, Grey,” Georgie says with a lopsided grin. He looks thinner every time she sees him, so it’s nothing new to see. But there’s something about this visit that tells Grey he’s not doing well.

“How are you doing?” Grey asks him, handing him the bags of food and two water bottles. “Find any cool sticks recently?”

“Can’t find a single damn stick worth adding to my collection these days,” Georgie huffs, his tone annoyed but clearly joking.

Grey chuckles lightly. “Then you haven’t tried Miracle Park,” she tells him. “I took a walk down there a few weeks ago and some mighty fine sticks that I know Cleo would love to fetch.”

The whole reason Georgie collects cool sticks in the first place is to play with Cleo. Cleo loves playing fetch, and since Georgie doesn’t have the money to buy her any real dog toys, he scours the city in search of the best sticks he can find. And Cleo loves joining him on his journey.

“Is that so?” Georgie hums to himself. “Good to know. I’ll keep that in mind. Well, thank ya, Grey!”

“Any time. Stay safe.”

Grey watches as Georgie fumbles his way down the fire escape slowly. He manages to get back to the sidewalk, and Cleo rises at his presence. The dog happily wags her tail and follows after her person down the concrete.

Grey smiles to herself watching them go. She’s glad to see Georgie with a smile, because there are times when she has seen him frowning and unable to joke with her. So it always warms her heart whenever he is so jovial and happy.

Once Georgie and Cleo vanish into the night Grey gathers her things. She goes to turn off the Angel’s Light and her spine tingles with that same sensation from earlier.

Someone is watching her.

Eager to get back inside and go to bed, Grey makes her way through the open window and begins putting all of her supplies away as fast as she can. A light breeze blows into the bedroom while she finishes up.

“I gotta hand it to ya, this whole setup you have going on is pretty impressive.”

The sudden voice nearly scares Grey out of her skin. She whips around, the box of gauze still in her hands. Fear immediately sluices through her at the sight of another person standing over by the very open window. Judging by just the voice and body she assumes it’s a man. He’s covered head-to-toe in black clothing, including the balaclava that obscures his face. She can barely make out his pale skin that is half hidden by the coat hood pulled up over his head.

“Who are you?” Grey hisses, even though she is terrified out of her mind. This masked stranger standing in her father’s old bedroom with her has planted her to the very spot she stands. And right about now, she really wishes the bowie knife wasn’t on the other side of the room.

The man has one of her many medical encyclopedias in his gloved hands. He flips through it lazily without acknowledging Grey.

Grey’s hands are trembling as she watches the man close the thick book and put it back on the bookshelf in front of him. He steps away and wanders around the room at a leisurely pace, ignoring Grey’s presence.

“You’ve made this into your very own triage room, haven’t you?” he muses. He strides by the blood pressure machine that is drilled in to the wall, another shelf stacked to the brim with various medical supplies, and the old bed frame and mattress she had converted into a proper hospital bed, white sheets and everything. “Like I said, impressive.”

The man sits down in the armchair. Then he’s reaching behind it and the bowie knife is in his hand. Grey curses herself as her heart is pounding wildly from inside her ribcage, making her pulse throb almost painfully. Her veins are on fire as she watches him with the eyes of a hawk. Every single one of her instincts are screaming at her to do something.

But what?

“Who are you?” Grey repeats with a shaking voice. “And what are you doing here?”

Grey watches as the man relaxes in the chair, his legs spreading wide like he owns the fucking place. He rolls his neck with a sigh before speaking.

“Who I am doesn’t matter,” he says, almost in a bored tone. He twirls the knife in his hand. “But what I’m doing here does matter. I’m here about that note you got. I come alone.”

Shit.

Is this one of those people Vivian had warned her about? Someone part of that violent gang that basically controls the entire city?

Grey can feel a panic attack brewing from just below her sternum.

“W-What note?”

“Don’t play dumb. You know the note I’m talking about.” He turns his face towards her. “I have a message.”

The man rises to his feet, the knife still in-hand. He slowly approaches Grey and ends up backing her into the wall behind her. Her grip tightens on the box of gauze the moment he halts. And god, he towers over her by at least a foot. But now she can see his eyes, and they are the blackest pits with an unknown light from within.

“There are others coming after you.” He speaks so softly his words are nearly inaudible. “What you provide the Concrete Jungle is valuable, and we know that. They know that.”

“What?”

Grey surprises herself with the sheer terror and shakiness of her own voice. There are more people coming after her? But why? What could she possibly offer to be considered so valuable?

The masked man continues to stare down at her for a few more seconds before vacating her personal space. He begins making his way back towards the window.

“Consider this protection,” he tells her from over his shoulder, his voice no longer so quiet. “With me being here like this, it tells others I’m laying claim. So you should be fine for the time being. Just don’t do anything brash or that would catch their attention even more, alright?”

“W-Wait, what?! What the fuck are you talking about?”

Grey continues to throw question after question at this mysterious man, but he keeps ignoring her until he is stood outside on the fire escape. He looks back at her, now that she is only a few feet away from the window.

“Keep an eye out. I’ll be around.”

And without another word, the man jumps from the fire escape and disappears down the dark street below.

thank you for reading! hope you enjoyed! likes and reblogs are very much appreciated <3

♱ foliosriot 2024

[windybluebelles]

There should be more fics where Dick adopts Duke.

I’ve been doing some calculations and I’ve approximately worked out all of the age gaps in the batfam (apart from Alfred, I have no clue when that guy was born) and the double Ds have around the same age gap as Bruce had with Dick, and that’s a fun parallel.

Just think for a moment, Dukes parents get attacked earlier, he becomes homeless earlier, he meets Dick while he’s still suffering from Jason’s death, he becomes Robin instead of Tim.

Now, there is the whole issue of that making Tim not becoming Robin (and if Tim doesn’t join the family than neither will Steph, which isn’t great) but, Duke has magic. Tim would obviously still be a freaky stalker and it’s much more difficult to hide from someone who can see the future. Steph would still become spoiler cause that never had anything to do with Batman, also, don’t Steph and Duke live near eachother? Like there is entirely the chance that they met pre-vigilantism and could recognise eachother.

Duke being Dick’s kid would also crest some fun scenarios for Damian, who not only has to worry about not being Robin and recognised as Bruce’s kid, he will also have to worry about being accepted by Dick. In cannon, Dami kind of easily (well not easy but you get what I mean) slips Into the role of “Dick’s baby” if he already has a baby than Damian has less of a foot hold on his place in the family.

Also, How tf would Jason’s whole ‘Replacement’ thing work out? Cause Duke wouldn’t be Bruce’s kid, and, Dick actually gave him Robin. Neither Jay nor Tim were really properly given Robin. Duke (and Damian in canon ig) would have more of a right to Robin than either of them. Plus, one of the big hatred things Jason had for Tim was that he was rich, Duke has never been rich.

Idk, I just think this is cool.

Don’t come at me about time lines because DC barely has one so shush

[loving-n0t-heyting]

I realize you are unlikely to be a receptive audience for this sentiment, but while I agree that people are wrong to take mere panhandling as an immediate threat to their life and respond with force "in self-defense", I think it is important to realize that they are responding to something that really is worth being wary of, and which is taboo to discuss in polite society. At the margins, there is a spectrum between begging and mugging; this only really applies to the very most aggressive beggars, but as with any group, more aggressive beggars are disproportionately visible. There is clearly a very socially relevant Type Of Guy who is mainly a beggar rather than a mugger because of his cowardice, a circumstance which one would expect to gradually shift as he grows more desperate; it is this type who is responsible for phenomena like people hurrying past beggars or otherwise avoiding them, not some nebulous socialist-friendly bogeyman like racism or bourgeoisie guilt.

"you are unlikely to be a receptive audience for this sentiment" well i mean A+ on yr theory of mind if nothing else

i suppose the first thing to say is that i dont see how fearfully treating all beggars as would-be muggers until proven innocent is really supposed to be distinct from "socialist-friendly bogeyman like racism or bourgeoisie guilt:" similar rationales are at play in the common paranoid demonisation of blacks and the poor as vicious imminent threats abut whom responsible self-interested members of society must tragically exercise perpetual vigilance. in fact, you might think mentally conflating all members of a group with their worst most dangerous representatives is kind of the hallmark of all bigotry whatsoever

anyway ig its true there are plemty of beggars who mainly do not rob passersby out of cowardice, and who can be expected to indulge in this temptation when and as the incentives against robbery weigh less and less heavily relative to other concerns. the same is true of every other segment of society, this being a principal reason for the existence of like, criminal law. put this abstractly you are correct but in an uninteresting way bc the same could be said of any large class of ppl to begin with

also i dont buy this stuff about terror and hatred of the homeless being unmentionable in polite society. the cali legislature is gonna count as polite society if anything does, right? the same one that virtually unanimously passed the CARE act? seems like it was pretty mentionable there!

[imfromthemiddlekingdom]

Felony saying that everyone in the universe can access the force if they tried hard enough makes me want to deck him in his fugly face

He’s ruining all established canon in real time. Speed running the absolute destruction of continuity of the SW universe and people are still rooting for him and his blorbo self inserts like there’s no tomorrow. Literally the whole reason I no longer engage in Ashoka content is because he massacred my girl and made her so one dimensional that my Mary Sue self insert fanfics OCs I wrote when I was 14 looks well developed compared to the absolute bland “girlboss kick ass take names” personality Ashoka has right now.

There were so many opportunities for him to explore the absolute potential of angst and conflict within Ashoka in this new series, to give her character a believable story of grief loss and growth yet he threw it all away because he wanted his OC to be the specialist girl that ever lived. This series could’ve been used to explore Ashokas conflicting feelings regarding the Anakin that taught her and was a mentor to her whilst trying to connect it to the monster that killed her family and hunted her culture into almost extinction and tried to kill her, a person he confessed to love as a sister, on Malachor. It could’ve been a good send off to a great character, to have her face that the Skyguy she put on a pedestal in her mind was in actuality the worst sort of scum and have her try to come to terms that just because she can forgive him for being the genocidal maniac he was and still hold love in her heart for who he used to be and also understand why the Jedi, her family, wasn’t the reason for their own downfall.

But alas. We got another series of “the Jedi caused their own downfall!!! Anakin did nothing wrong ever and him killing all my family and everyone I’ve ever known is so not his fault!!! It’s definitely the fault of the unbending stuck in the past council!!!”. Instead of a series that could’ve made Ashoka’s “departure” (literally never going to happen with felony at the helm, he’s going to find a way to make her immortal and then show up 200 years in the future to be the protagonist of another light v dark fight since she’s his special SI) from the series tie in nicely thematically and canonically with every other Star Wars media we have, he decided that the best way to have this series go down is 1) everyone is force sensitive if they tried hard enough ig and 2) the Jedi were bad!!! Their protocols don’t work! They were mean to my little meow meow Anakin Skywalker the greatest Jedi of all times™️ therefore he got to kill them all!!!!

Got a bit off topic but I’m still so mad that he had this chance to make Ashoka truly experience growth like the first 5 seasons of TCW yet he decided maintaining the badass rebel without a cause aesthetics for her was more important then good story telling.

Honestly though, my main problem with this series is that he decided that apparently everyone in the universe can be force sensitive if they “just tried hard enough”. Like your Midichlorian Count no longer matters since even if you were Force-Null you can still be special!!!!

This takes away any and all urgency in the Jedi Fallen Order games. It makes Cals journey absolutely redundant. It throws away all the tragedy contained in having inquisitors being force sensitive kids kidnapped from their parents and tortured till they give into the dark side. If all beings are able to use the force in his universe then there are no consequences to the inquisitors not finding the Holocron that holds the names to all force sensitive children in the universe. There would be no need to them to chase Cal and the Mantis Crew throughout the universe to obtain what they have. They could’ve just went down to any random level in Coruscant and take homeless Force-Null kids and train them.

Even better! It makes the entirety of the KOTOR games redundant!!!! Oh and I guess the hidden path is also redundant since everyone can be force sensitive and no one truly needs more saving from the empire over others :/ totally not like these kids that were saved by the path would’ve been taken and tortured into inquisitors, definitely not since EVERYONE is force sensitive nowadays or is it just the ones Ashoka trains herself because she’s the “living embodiment of the daughter uwu she’s so special and unique look how well she can train a non force sensitive to be force sensitive!!!”

Everyone in the Star Wars universe has Midichlorian’s in their blood. That is a fact. It is also an established fact that the amount each person has is different and is not determined nor dependent on lineage. Force-Nulls typically range in the 1000-3000 count and you need 7000 to be force sensitive and higher to be accepted into the order. (The order isn’t the end all be all of force cultures, Rouge One shows that Jedha’s force culture isn’t restricted to only force sensitives as the Guardian’s were never specified to be only a religious order of force sensitives. And high canon doesn’t depict many other force cultures but we know that there are many force cultures in the universe that co-exist with the Jedi with which the Jedi weren’t in opposition towards; literally not even the witches of Dathomir were oppositions anywhere outside of the battle fields.) You don’t need to be force sensitive to be part of a force culture (Jedha literally has pilgrims who come far and wide to make a pilgrimage to the holy site and not all of them were force sensitive), Sabine could’ve very easily been taught the tenets of the Jedi without retconning her to be force sensitive or making everyone in the universe force sensitive.

No where in either the EU or High Canon did anyone ever say that you have to be force sensitive to be a badass or to make a difference. Hera did not hold the title of the best pilot in the universe just for some rat of a man to come and say that Anakin was the best because *muh force sensitivity!!!!* Some of the most heroic and most influential (good or bad) people in the franchise are Force-Null! And that’s great! It means that the force doesn’t make anyone better than anyone else! It’s a quirk of the universe! To retcon that everyone can and is force sensitive if they tried hard enough is literally cheapening everything the franchise stands for. Andor did not literally give us an entire story about how Force-Nulls in the Galaxy makes just as much of a difference as force sensitives for felony to come out and say that “you know what??? Midichlorian’s are a scam! You get a force sensitivity! You get a force sensitivity! Everyone gets a force sensitivity!!!!”

Sabine was great as she was in rebels, why cheapen it with “oh she’s actually force sensitive all this time!!!” When we could’ve stuck with badass Force-Null Mandalorian can kick your ass five ways to Sunday with her paint bombs and blasters you force wielding asshole!!! Like why even do that felony. Do you want people to hate her??? Nvm ofc you do, you need Ashoka to be the best in every way possible even if it means ruining every other beloved character in this franchise👍

[kaycode1999]

hey!! Ik you’re probs a bit busy w these so no rush, but I’d like to request a match up for either mha or kny. My pronouns are she/her and I’m a female, either gender is fine by me!

For personality, Im have the ISFP type. I’m quite introverted, I hate speaking to strangers, or people in general. Crowds kinda scare me as well. I’m pretty shy and meeting new people is especially difficult for me. Im pretty funny (not my own words) and I love to draw, read, write, or anything with creativity tbh. I’m practically married to my Spotify, there’s barely any time you won’t see me without headphones. I get decent grades, but I do tend to get distracted very easily and I zone out a ton! I’m pretty outgoing once you get to know me, and I’m definitely a bit touch and attention starved. My aesthetic is sorta tomboyish ig. I’ve been told multiple times that I dress like I’m homeless lol. My favourite colour is navy blue.i hardly ever wear make up also, I’m just too lazy

I have shoulder length hair that’s sooo thick. It takes forever to brush and I can’t even shower properly w it. I like to dye my hair, and right now it’s purple at the ends with my natural roots (brown). My favourite season is fall just bc where I am we get stormy autumn’s, and I LOVE stormy weather. I usually go outside when it’s raining as well, I adore it.id definitely consider myself an insomniac as well, staying up to ungodly hours of the morning on the days before tests has proven that. It’s nonstop, I can’t remember a single night I went to bed before midnight. This means I also have hella dark under eyes 😭

thx for taking the time to look at this!

(also sry for the bad set up of the request, I rambled)

Demon Slayer/ Kimetsu no Yaiba

I match you with

Mitsuri Kanroji

Mitsuri can be nervous around crowds or people she doesn't know too, or at least she was. I know I saw either a fanart or a manga panel of her hiding in Rengoku’s haori somewhere and it was adorable. So she understands

I think she's gotten more comfortable and able to handle dealing with strangers better now, so she'll take the lead and keep the pressure off of you

She loves your humor and thinks you're hilarious

I think she's creative too, but of your interests she probably shares reading the most

She will give you all the affection you want😂 she's a sweetheart like that

She's not the kind to mind if you don't wear makeup or if dress “tomboyish” she just loves you for you

She'll love to help you take care of your hair, she knows a few things from taking care of her own long thick hair

She's has to stay up all night dealing with demons a lot herself, so she might be up to be there with you anyway

My Hero Academia

I match you with

Dabi/ Touya Todoroki

By nature he's pretty introverted and does not socialize…. Like at all

Your humor was surprising to him, as in he didn't really have anything to genuinely laugh about before you. Now he laughs all the time because of you. *its a small chuckle or maybe even a smirk/smile but a win is a win*

He's more destructive in nature, not creative, but I think over time your creativity rubs off on him

He's attention and affection starved too, unfortunately that means that at first he isn't used to it. But eventually you both get comfortable with each other and giving and receiving affection

He dresses a lot like you so win-win, you get to swap clothes

We've all seen the jokes about him being a hairstylist correct?😂 It would be in a different way than he normally does *through fire* but he would help you with your hair too. He really likes you're colorful hair

He likes rainy/stormy weather as well, so if you go out in it he will definitely join you

Does he ever sleep anyway?😭😭 He’ll more than likely be up along with you

But you guys can have your own special thing when that happens like playing cards or going for walks. Nice quality time

I truly believe Dabi could be good if given the love and affection he deserves so being with you just automatically makes him better

[just-sp-in-inginthevoid]

My attempt at making the curse makes sense

+ the time leap powers too because why not

Spoilers up to the final arc of Tokyo Revengers

We’ll discuss three different things. 1) How the curse works, 2) Why Sanzu was affected by it, 3) And why Takemichi succeeded to make it calm down.

Keep in mind that it’s my headcanons and that Wakui could one day give information that ruin everything i wrote. And you can of course have another view on it and/or not like my way of thinking !

Who, What, Where, When and Why

Shinichiro was the cursed one. The homeless man cursed Shinichiro, and it’s never revealed by him how he actually cursed him.

The curse went to Mikey – Why is it ? He’s the reason Shinichiro killed the homeless man. So, three different theories. 1 : it’s because of his death that Shinichiro kills, so without Mikey the curse doesn’t exist, 2 : he’s supposed to be dead but he’s not – a sort of karma ?, 3 : if the curse was meant to hurt Shinichiro, then making Mikey hurt and unable to stop hurting was definitely the way to go.

What’s the curse’s purpose anyway ? Why does it make Mikey act like that ?

The curse feeds on tragedy, the more tragedy, the more it grows, the more it grows, the more hungry it gets, the more it wants tragedy, the more it triggers tragedy. And by feeding on tragedy i mean all the negative feelings that go hand-in-hand with. Sadness, despair, helplessness, rage, regrets, guilt… It clings to someone who already has a tragic life and it worsens it. Mikey didn’t have a father and lost his mother, his life wasn’t all happy from the start ; Sanzu… We don’t know enough about the Akashi but he doesn’t have his mother, his father is always out working and his relationship with Takeomi is so, so bad ; Kazutora – who had never met Shinichiro – was the one to be affected by the curse and not Baji – who knew Shinichiro for a while so the ‘it affected everyone around him’ should’ve worked here – and Baji doesn’t have a typical family life either since he only has his mom, but his relationship with his mom is great, and it’s not the same as what Kazutora has to deal with at home.

And while we cannot say if i’m right ; the fact the curse grew with time is undeniable

What do you mean you were ‘following Mikey as if you were in a trance’

this is why we cant have nice things

So. Sanzu.

It is revealed he only acted that way because he ‘was in a trance’ (→ the curse affected him). Not going to talk about how much it pissed me off when i read that. But why would he be affected by it? Emma wasn’t, Senju wasn’t, Takeomi, Wakasa & Benkei weren’t, grandpa Sano wasn’t, Baji burnt cars and threw punches at anyone who might look at him but that wasn’t the curse (final timeline 7 y/o Baji punching Takemichi) (it could still be, of course, but it doesn’t feel as violent as Mikey and Sanzu have it. Then again, he didn’t live long enough to tell ig), Inui and Draken weren’t either… What does Sanzu has, who is Sanzu for him to be affected by it ? Shinichiro’s trigger. He is tied to the time leap power and to the curse then. He was also the first victim of the curse, when it was still very small, and that might have given him a sort of immunity/protection which caused the curse not to directly harm him anymore. He’s here in Bonten when Mikey drove every other person close to him away. Twelve years, and Mikey didn’t kill him with his dark impulses whereas they appear soon after Takemichi talk to him.

Or it could be Mikey’s seemingly incapacity to harm anyone he knew before being cursed. He wouldn’t hurt Emma, wouldn’t hurt Baji, wouldn’t hurt Shinichiro, didn’t hurt Senju, hurt Sanzu once or twice. So the curse could not affect much/at all people Mikey knew before Shinichiro’s time leap.

Then again, Emma & Baji didn’t remain alive long enough to know if Mikey could’ve/would’ve hurt them.

Or. Sanzu was 'in a trance' because his job is to make the dark impulses grow. After all, he says he had waited for them when they finally show up. Maybe that's how the curse affects him – by forcing him to make Mikey act on them. By forcing him to preserve it. Or maybe it's all that I just wrote. Or maybe it's neither.

Edit:

So. This is the official translation from what I understood.

Which change one thing: it's canon it's not because of the curse (or at least not only) that Sanzu is insane ☺ He just Is.

Takemichi’s power of friendship

Shinichiro dies on the day he let go of the power, on the day he gave it to Takemichi. It is said relatively often that Shinichiro was what held Mikey back from letting go of his dark impulses, hence, Takemichi snapped Mikey back to reality because he is the host of the time leaping power. But Mikey almost killed Takemichi thrice, and that’s when the distinction between him and Shinichiro happens. Mikey himself go to Takemichi to tell him to yell at him if he ever snapped like Shinichiro would have, but Takemichi isn’t Shinichiro – Takemichi isn’t his big brother whom he loves so much and whom loved him so much.

The curse knows it was born out of the time leaping power, that it wouldn’t exist if Shinichiro didn’t kill to gain the power. So when Takemichi stops Mikey from killing Kazutora, it goes away, when Takemichi says they’re friends, it goes away. Sure, it still pushes Mikey to shoot Takemichi, or sending Takemichi to the hospital and then stabbing him with a katana through the heart, but im trying my best to think of a reason that isnt ‘shonen spirit, friendship power or nothing’ at the end, it’s a curse meant to destroy everything Mikey holds dear, to render him incapable to be happy and it can go past the fact it’s its creator it is killing. Plus, Takemichi isn’t its creator, Shinichiro is. Hence, the curse rather not hurt the power that created it, but it isn’t against it, especially if the holder is not its creator. Edit: The curse is what killed Shinichiro at the end, because that’s what it’s job was - yet, it only did on the day he let go of the power, so he couldn’t be protected by it the way Takemichi is at the start of the story. The curse could’ve been confused since Takemichi had the power (and perhaps confused him with its creator) at first and then as the story went on, it realized he wasn’t.

This link between the time leap powers and the curse might also give me a reason why Mikey knew when Takemichi came back in the past. The same way Naoto can feel when Takemichi goes back to the future, chapter 2 : “When I shook hands with you 12 years ago, I could feel you inside past you disappear.”

+ So about the ‘deathlike state’ in chapter 7 and how it never happened again...

The difference between Takemichi going back to the future this time and all the other times that follow is actually pretty simple : it’s his consciousness that goes back to the past, that we all agree of, it’s canon, and that’s it. When Takemichi goes back in the past and changes his past self’s life even so slightly, they don’t end up having the same kind of life or way of thinking.

By that I mean : when Takemichi went back to the past knowingly for the first time (and accidentally came back) he didn’t change anything. He still got his ass beat by Kiyomasa, he may have met Draken and Mikey but that isn’t enough to change his past self’s personality ; they’ll end up sharing the same and if they’re the same then there’s only one Takemichi. Whereas all the other times he went back from that point on, he has changed his past self’s life (fighting Kiyomasa, saving Draken, getting stab in the hand). Which means they won’t have the same life experience, which means they won’t be the same and won’t share their consciousness.

Because among the various things the last arc teaches us, there’s that :

It’s not linear. Takemichi didn’t re-write the timeline. He created new ones. Alternate dimensions exist in TR. If they didn’t, the timeline would stop everytime a time leaper goes back. Just straight up cut reality and existence to replace it with other, either 100 % similar or completely different, stuffs. But Sanzu remembers days after Shinichiro’s death and time leap. Why only days ? What happened then ? I don’t wanna know. But it’s probably the same for Naoto. He remembers more of the other timeline that Takemichi does, because he doesn’t time leap with him – he stays in the dimension/timeline until Takemichi goes to a future he changed/created and then the Naoto from this newly-created future has the memories other-hims have plus his own.

And here for the question we don’t have an answer to… :

Where do the past-self of time leapers go ?

Do they go dormant ? Are they conscious and unable to control their body ? Do they have fuzzy memories of the time they’re not the one inhabiting their body ? Or do they not remember a thing ? Do they only have a vague understanding of time passing by like people in coma do ? If Takemichi and Mikey of the final timeline ever decide to go check on the future and leave their past (7 and 8 years old) self to deal with everything what would happen ? Would these children have grown up ? Or would they still have the same mentality ? How can you react to realizing it’s been years you haven’t been in control of your own body ? Surrounded by people you don’t know. Or maybe you do. But it wasn’t you. And if they never do, if Takemichi and Mikey continue living without bothering about the past and the future, never bothering to use the time leaping powers anymore, what would happen to those 7 and 8 years old them ? The time leaping powers allow you to be a parasite to your own body. It sounds awful.

It’s a bit different with the time triggers, or so i think because it seems awfully similar. The time triggers follow the time leapers which means their main source of memories are from the timeline they initially left, and the other memories from the other timelines become additional. Sanzu is more the Sanzu who lost Mikey than Sanzu who got scarred by him. WHICH. If you compare it to Naoto and Takemichi, makes it so, so interesting (at least for me) because it means, that even though OG timeline!Sanzu and Shinichiro didn’t shake hands, the fact from-OG timeline!Shinichiro shook hands with Sanzu which led to him remembering about the OG timeline, means that Naoto has his memories from when he died with Hinata in the very first timeline.

Time triggers get additional memories ; time leapers keep their own consciousness and don’t merge with their past self.

Which begs the question : what timeline would Mikey remember if him and Takemichi shook hands to go to the future ? Would it be the timeline Takemichi is from (no memories of Takemichi, Draken dying on 8/3, Kazutora and Baji (probably) both dying on Halloween…) or would it be all the timelines Takemichi went through ? Or since he also became a time leaper, he only has Kanto Manji memories ? And we can’t use Naoto or Sanzu as examples, Sanzu only shook Shinichiro’s hand once and Naoto shook Takemichi’s hand since Takemichi started to time leap ; their memories ‘updated’ at the same time, each time (final timeline aside, of course). So… So we don’t know. But Mikey’s core memories would be of Kanto Manji, and the other timelines would be additional. (or would his core memories be of Bonten ? That’s the first timeline he shook Takemichi’s hand in and the first timeline he acted as a time trigger. Idk man, it’s all so complicated and (purposely) unclear)

And it all comes to the same thing once again : Is it better if Mikey doesn’t remember those timelines (because a Mikey who has memories from : Kanto Manji, Bonten, Manila, and all the Bad Toman ones is not going to be a very stable Mikey. Not that he is with his Kanto Manji memories but stil.) or should Takemichi carry the role of the only one to remember ?

[macabremacabra]

Letz Organize!!11!!11!!

Hey bitches, first longgg blog post from us, we'll be doing these as often as possible and makes sense here on tumblr! All of these posts will be linked in our IG stories and posts to further detail what's occuring and to be occuring in more detail:)

We'll also share art and creations from any of our friends on tumblr, and those who aren't, with their blessing:3

You'll have seen on our IG posts that we're currently fund raising for yet again another skip to further clear space in the house. This is our absoloute main priority atm as the clutter makes the living situation very difficult indeed!

Further to this you may also have read that we have plans for our home to become a more open and usefuls space for other trans people. We want to make clear that we do not want to become an open door social centre, we're very much still a vulnerable group of homeless trannies trying to lie low enough (while still being loud enuf) to keep this decrepit roof over our fragile lil heads, so any activities or events in our home will b on our terms, and out of hours visits will be by appointment only and chargeable by the hour;p

We face some obsrtacles before being able to achieve what we're setting out to do with our home and we need help!

Our entire ground floor is in disrepair. The floor upon entry of the front door is completely fucked up, if you've been to our gaf you've probably had a few near misses with it's many gaping holes. This makes our home and space difficult or impossible to access for anyone with mobility impairments, and dangerous for everyone. If you can fix a floor, please get in touch. No one in the house drives, or has money for building supplies, making buying and transporting materials to fix the floor extremely difficult. If you cant fix a floor, but you can drive or help out with costs, , pls msg us!

We have two rooms currently unuseable, one full of old rubbish, with a caved in sealing, that with the roof removed and connected with our back garden could make a wonderful outdoor space for friends and friends 2 b of the house to enjoy in the nicer weather:)

Our other fucked up room, dubbed the "shit room" is a v big room, but its full floor to ceiling with furniture. We would love to arrange a day for anyone to come and pick what they like from the room. We'll keep everyone updated on when this will happen on our social channels, but in the meantime if you'd like to volunteer to help pick through and clear out the room let us know.

We also have a small yard between the caved in roof room and the shit room. It's also full of furniture. The back door is blocked as items were thrown in from above, so the only way in and out is from above, over the one storey extension at the rear, meaning most large objects, like bed frames, will have to be removed via that route. Depending on the resources we have and the help we can get, it might just be doable:)

We've had lots of talks in the house about what we would love to do with our space and how it could benefit the wider, and especially the homeless trans community.

We plan on actively sourcing injection supplies and provide them to whoever needs for no cost. We plan to focus on getting the common supplies used for injecting hrt but this will be a no questions asked system. We will tell you what we have and ANYONE can take some. We will not be able to take sharps back of you but will try have a supply of sharp bins. We also are thinking of setting it up in a way so it is completely anonymous too. You text ahead and we have it waiting at the door. Either way we know that are people out there struggling to get supplies and we wanna help.

One of the rooms we mentioned earlier in the post is planned to be a function room of sorts, providing a free venue for groups struggling to afford or secure for any other reasons, a venue for meetings or whatever else. Close friend of the house Xav will be hosting pole dancing classes here, hopefully within the coming few weeks!!! Very excited abt this. We've also thought about maybe a clothes library/xchange one night a week, tranny trad sessions, and most importantly more floor space for cans on the weekends:}

We're open to any proposals for uses of the space once we have it cleared out, so let us kno:)

Outside of the house, we're planning to organise a day for skating once a week, where anyone with a board can come and meet up and have a skate, more experienced skaters can share tips and help those of us trying to learn or imrprove. Message us and we'll make a groupchat soon on whatever platform is most convenient to organise:)

Thats all for now, this was hard to sit down and type and will probably be even hard to actually read so ty:3

[the-whispers-of-death]

something something what if its *only* the magic user!reader who dies. maybe because of their affinity and innate connection to death, theyre hardcore haunting their house. maybe they died in the process of the ressurection (a life for a life or something like that)

i imagine he lived a bit away from town, yknow, as witches and wizards often do. i mean with all the trinkets and oodles and magical doodads used in witchcraft, its understandable why. or maybe he just liked the solitude of it all, and only afterwards the boys moved in? idk, just a vague thought so the plot makes sense. maybe.

if we lean into the witchcrafty side... what if reader had a familiar as well. idk, lets say a crow or a wolf. i like to imagine that they are pseudo-immortal beings. it wouldnt die alongside reader (if the cutesy animal companion baby dies i can and do cry. violently. a psa) but it also fully refuses to leave the body alone. or their bedroom. or grave

maybe criminal!stone and serial killer!stone had their separate living spaces outside the readers witch hut (with kali most likely wanting to go live with serial killer!stone, if i understand his character properly?. wait not retcon that i forgot serial killer stone was fucking dead, unless someone kept paying for the house, they HAVE to live together w someone now)

so like. what do they even do now. theres a now ownerless house, a lone magical critter, a persistent ghost!reader and a whole lotta fucking drama now.

... something something an attempt on bringing reader back to life using the same spells (BAD IDEA BTW... but kinda in character ig) or maybe they left a will somewhere thats like "take my fucking books and dont you dare lose them. i WILL be back, if not by your hands then by mine alone."

or.. the familiar maybe slooooowly feeding magic into ghost!reader now and eventually, after so *so* long, they are pseudo-tangible. maybe they cant touch or interact with objects still, but hes not flickering either. hes just. there. being transparent and visible to the world and seeing the world back

idk. i tried to write this ask like 5 times and i still dont know if it was worded in a way that makes sense, but when in doubt, fuck it we ball

~ rusty

Kali and Serial Killer!Stone are homeless because the house he and Serial Killer!Stone were living in when Kali died got raided by law enforcement (because they were looking for Serial Killer!Stone) and so Serial Killer!Stone had just been living out in "safe houses" that were really just abandoned warehouses before he met you.

So I imagine they both stay and live in your house, if not also Criminal!Stone staying in the house too so he could feel your presence around him even if he couldn't see or touch you.

If anyone would be dumb enough to try and bring you back, it'd be Serial Killer!Stone. He feels so guilty that he's the reason you died and his life's always supposed to end in tragedy so he might as well be the life taken in the "a life for a life" resurrection spell. Besides, he's hopped universes, surely if any of the three have magic, it's him.

[bearzisvibin]

Summary: Grian, an 17 year old boy, had a secret: he preferred men over women. Except.. it wasn't really a secret anymore and he was now homeless.

Luckily, his best friend and slightly sketchy person Mumbo Jumbo was there to give him a job with one of his many connections.

-

Born from a rich family, soon to be 18 Etho Labs was being prepared to take over his family's business and fortune from his long dead parents when he got struck with a disease.

He had gotten too tired to even get out of bed, but when his friend and business ally Mumbo asked to help a friend in need he really started to look out for the company.

(probably will post this on AO3 later, this is a Gritho/Grian x Etho fic too btw sooo....)

TW: Slurs, internalized homophobia, sick person ig, sexual discrimination.

old timey setting i think? But not historically accurate.

Chapter 1

•Grian had nowhere to go, his parents threw him out of their house and honestly? He deserved it. He deserved it because he was a faggy bitch, because sometimes he liked to wear skirts and look pretty in makeup when that was a girl's thing, because he chose to love men and because he was weak.

But now it wasn't time to cry, if he wanted to survive out here he had to make a decision, and he had to make it quickly.

He walked through the streets in shame, pretty sure he would get a cold best case scenario, and frostbite in the worst case because of the winter slowly but surely approaching.

He wished he was wearing more than the thin jumper and simple black pants at the moment.

---

It was already night when he got to his friend's porch. Mumbo might judge him, maybe even hate him, but he also knew every type of people and places and certainly would find a place for him.

He knocked once, after a few seconds twice and then once again. Mumbo taught him this since day one, so he would know it wasn't some authority begging for information on his more sketchy friends.

The man slowly opened the door. I took a few seconds for him to realize 'oh, it's just Grian', but he hurried to open the door fully as soon as he noticed, akwardly inviting him to enter his house.

"... I'll always wonder how someone like you could be a sketchy person, you're just so awkward and gentle."

Mumbo giggled slightly at that, then they talked and talked about everything and nothing. It was nice.

It was after more than an hour when the situation he was in got brought up by the other.

"....And it was amazing!! She danced soo well you should've seen it!! I recommended her to a party for a friend's child, such a adorable kid too!! So respectful! Well, but enough of me."

His face fell at those words, putting what Grian called his 'business face' on. The thing is: he never used it at him.

"What are you doing here Grian? I could help you, but it depends on the job."

It took all in Grian's body to not flinch, instead he put on his best smile of amusement.

"What do you mean Mumbo?"

Mumbo leaned back on his chair, crossing his arms.

"You've been... Jumpy since you got here, the first thing you said was about me being sketchy, you're not wearing weather appropriate clothing and i know how sensitive you are to the cold."

He eyed the younger man up and down, and Grian realized he was reading his body language.

"You look stiff too, your face is ever so slightly faltering and you've been undeniably quieter."

Grian couldn't hold it anymore, he gave up on maintaining his stoic face and almost immediately tears fell down his face.

"I- I'm not sure if you'll be okay with what i've been doing but... I got thrown out of my house because i'm... Because i sinned and loved the wrong way. I wanted men the same way i should want women and i sinned by doing so!"

Instead of anger, disgust or even just apathy, he saw worry in the other's eyes. Mumbo was three years older than Grian and lived on his own, but Grian was younger and inexperienced in anything life related.

"Oh Grian, i- why would i resent you for that? You can stay here for now if you want? I can buy you a house and pay for it until you get a proper jo-"

Grian turned his offer down immediately.

"No!! Gosh no, i can't take advantage of you like that! I just want a job, one who pays enough for me to live, i don't care what... Type."

Mumbo frowned.

"I'm not gonna get you a job as a prostitute, you're too young. And i'm also not going to put you in any dangerous or extra sketchy situation. And I definitely won't make you work for someone who doesn't accept who you are."

He seemed deep in thought.

"This seems to shorten the list quite a bit... But i probably can get a job for you."

Grian waited and waited, he seemed to be thinking for quite a bit, before getting to a conclusion.

"There's this boy who's really sick, he's from a rich family who pays people very well and he's also quite not convencional, you know, like you Grian."

Grian froze, before panicking.

"Wha? What?? So he's like, a fag or something? I'm trying to get away from these bad thoughts please don't push me to do the wrong thing i-"

Mumbo shushed him, looking sorry, with pity even.

"Oh Grian, don't be like that. Etho is trans, was born a girl and now is a boy. He isn't wrong for that, because those are his feelings and his truth and he can't change that, nnd neither can you. You haven't sinned, you've discovered yourself, go along with it."

Grian heard Mumbo's advice, his friend aways knew what to say and Grian felt a bit better.

---

Grian was getting tired, Mumbo talked a lot at once and as much as he loved to listen he did have a very rough day.

He tried to fight back a yawn, ultimately losing.

"Oh you must be tired! I'll get a room ready for you, you'll stay here at my house while i try to get you that job."

---

Grian was fine, he could pretend it was just a sleepover at his old friend's house! He could pretend he just chose to get a job and live a new life! He could!!

But he didn't really want to.

His first day at Mumbo's house was filled with soft, silent crying.

----

Grian had beem to his house for almost a week when Mumbo announced that he got the job.

"Etho's very quiet and a lot of people left the job because he wasn't a friendly person, but he does like the company even if he doesn't show it."

The taller took a sip from his tea, telling him the basics of the job. It was clear that he and 'Etho' were friends for a long time.

"He's really sick, but he'll survive, probably. He doesn't have the energy to do certain activities and you should do them for him if he asks you to."

Mumbo got up, getting ready to leave for "work", what work? Grian chose not to know.

"I'll be out for a while bud, ask the maid if you need anything! She's very good at whatever job she does, you'll go like with the labs family tomorrow."

Grian simply nodded as Stress walked in the kitchen, she was nice company and he helped her with house chores sometimes, when being alone felt too bad to hold in.

---

Stress was guiding him to a train station, her and Mumbo having small talk together.

He spent enough time with the girl to know a lot of things: she was married to a inventor named Iskall, she loved flowers and pink, and she was absolutely the strongest person he knew.

She was nice and preferred to be heard than to be seen, she talked a lot just like Mumbo and they got along really well.

And now he wouldn't see her as much, which was a pity, but he would stop bothering Mumbo and get a job.

He knew less about 'Etho' than he knew about stress.

He was 17 just like Grian, he was rich and he was quiet, he was extremely sick and he was a tranny. Grian couldn't work with that much information! What if he fucked up? If he did something the other might not like? He would be damned for sure!

Well now it didn't matter because he was at the train station, the train arriving in less than twenty minutes and a Mumbo getting emotional.

"Aagh, you! I can't believe you're leaving! You're like my little brother and look at you now! All grown up and on your own! Will you be alright? I can aways go get you and you can come back to living in my house, we could spend our time playing board games together if you-"

Stress giggled a bit while agressively elbowing the taller.

"Oh don't worry your little head Mumbo! The sunflower will be fine. Sunflowers are known to aways find the sun anyways."

Grian felt his cheeks warm up, everything about this was so nice, bittersweet, but oh so nice.

Then, his train arrived.

"Oh!! This is the one. I'll- I'll miss you guys, ok? I'll try to keep in touch!!"

He then ran off, the train was relatively empty and quiet.

It was fine, he was going to be fine, this was his life and he was going to play by his own rules.

---

It took almost three hours for him to get to his destination, a small city with simple people, the only house that wasn't 'humble' was a mansion at the top of a hill, isolated from the rest.

Probably his workplace.

He stepped out of the train, shielding his eyes from the soft sun and enjoying the cool air of the end of fall.

Soon this will all be covered in snow.

He hummed happily at the thought, he liked winter when he wasn't freezing to death on his way to his friend's house.

In his joyful appreciation, he barely heard steps coming at him, and only opened his eyes when they stopped right by his side.

A well built ginger with a resting bitch face and pale skin, a long haired man wearing bright greens and blues and other colors around in his jewelry, a soft smile and a beard, a tall man with a apron and an even bigger beard right behind the two.

In front of the group was a small(but still taller than Grian, he noticed bitterly) boy, his skin was pale and his hair was white, he looked like he hadn't rested in a long time and he was wearing a mask.

He was cute.

"Oh! You must be Etho labs right? It's a pleasure to meet you. The name's Grian."

Etho seemed to be taken by surprise by this and Grian couldn't stop thinking he messed up.

"Oh, you seem quite surprised. I didn't say something wrong did I? I'm sorry if i did."

He bowed slightly at the other in apology.

"Oh no! Etho just isn't used to people talking directly to him. People tend to assume, because he's sick and young, he can't talk for himself."

Grian frowned slightly at the long haired man.

"Well, that sounds like bullshit."

The white haired boy laughed, but quickly got back to his blank face, this time with what he could see of his face red of embarrassment.

Grian smiled amused.

"Well, i suppose we should go. Lead the way please"

---

The walk was nice, they walked until they got into a park.

There was a carriage right next to a white rose bush, without thinking he plucked one of the flowers out and carefully took it's thorns out before getting in the carriage.

Then, with almost no thought, he put the rose behind the other's ear.

"This one matches you, take care of it."

The rest of the ride was uneventful, except for the small answers to the small questions he asked and one conversation they had together.

"Oh, i've never seen a lake this big."

"It's the ocean."

"It is?"

"Yes."

"Well, i've never seen the ocean too! I think it is pretty."

"Really? It's just so normal.... Just water, you know."

"It isn't 'just so normal", it's poetic!"

The talk ended with a little hum from the other.

Sometimes, the older ones would talk between themselves. The ginger was called 'Cleo', the long haired was called 'Joe' and the one with the apron seemed to be nicknamed 'Beef'.

Cleo seemed to be happy to get Etho a friend, the tall man Beef didn't want Grian to be here and Joe seemed to be the peace between the two, telling them that Grian will stay if Etho wants him to stay.

"He's Mumbo's ally! You know how dangerous that man can be."

Beef argued, Cleo shook her head.

"Etho is Mumbo's ally, and he's not dangerous is he? Plus that's a kid and we should offer help to a kid!"

"Oh great so now i'm a charity case. Just great!"

He said, making sure to look at the group. The three of them looked at the dirty blonde at the same time, Etho snickered and looked at him.

He smiled at the other,

---

It was clear he wasn't winning this Beef guy's trust, but he didn't need to.

Because Etho liked to spend time with him and he was honestly quite cool! He had books upon books on martial arts ("when i get better i will be the best fighter! Everyone will fear me and adore me, you'll see."), he loved gardening("nothing exists without those plants, caring for them is respecting my own existence.") And had knowledge in almost every field("i grew up an only child in a rich family, i didn't have a substitute, of course i know a lot.")

He wouldn't consider himself talkative, but around Etho even normal conversation seemed like too much talking.

The other didn't mind, answering questions when he was asked and even leaning on touch when Grian accidentally touched his shoulder or dragged him by his hand to explore the absolutely gigantic house.

How could anyone not want to spend time with him? Sure, he was almost aways silent and had a sassy personality but he was such a cool dude!

---

They were in the room reading when Cleo came in with two people he did not recognise.

Both seemed barely older then them, 4 years max, and they were dressed in fancy clothing.

One of them had brown hair and Scars all over his body and the other had black hair and glasses.

Grian didn't know what to think of this.

"Etho, mr Scar and Mr fan decided they needed to speak with you immediately."

The other took his eyes away from his book, he didn't know what Etho thought about those two either.

"Scar and Cub, founders of Concorp. Fancy seeing you, i'm glad for your visit. What may you need?"

He got up from his bed and bowed respectfully, Grian noticed admiration on his words.

The dirty blonde decided that he liked those two.

"Oh! That's a great question! Me and Cub are getting married, and i wanted to invite you to our wedding! Your family has been a sponsor since the start too so maybe you could do a speech about it."

Grian paused at this. Those two men are getting married.

He didn't think this was even possible! But then again, those people were probably loaded and could pay for everyone to shut up.

He imagined himself marrying another man. He was sure to wear a pretty dress to it, sue him if that makes him less of a man. He was already thinking about marrying a man, he wasn't going to stop himself by thinking about dresses.

He tried to imagine someone perfect for him, someone rich because he probably wouldn't be allowed to marry anyone otherwise, a person with strong ideals and personality, who is open to touch and is willing to hear and understand him, he also wanted the person to not be afraid to tell him what he thinks.

It certainly felt quite perfect for Grian.

He was taken away from his thoughts by a touch on his shoulder.

"Oh- uh... You weren't paying attention."

Etho was right in front of him, hunched over his armchair. Grian nodded once, Etho hurried to give him space and Grian bowed apologetic.

"I'm sorry, i got lost in thought. What were you saying again?"

Etho smiled (still with that damn mask, tho he could see he was smiling by his eyes) and explained the conversation.

Apparently, Etho was going to a very important wedding from those two loaded men who he was a childhood friend of. They created their own business and now had even more status than before so it was a very important meeting to make his family more popular or something like that.

But Etho was sick and it was kind of obvious that he couldn't go on his own, and since Grian "was getting paid to help him through his sickness", he "was assigned to take care of Etho during the wedding."

Cleo's words.

He nodded, and the brown haired man, Scar, clapped his hands together.

"Great! See you at the Wedding then!!"

...

Did he forget to say that he absolutely despised social gatherings?

[fellasleepinbaltimore]

cos I talked to my brother about it and like he wouldn't take the money I'd be willing to give him if he couldn't make rent and like I literally....ncghyky like I just think it makes me want to rip my face off in a sense bc like... he's like "I wouldn't do that to you" BITCH!!!?? IM LITERALLY YOUR OLDER BROTHER I DON'T WANT YOU TO BE HOMELESS AT UR YOUNG AGEEEEEEE FUCK YOU MEEEAAN but also like.... how can I make him??? like I could always like skip it to my dad and like... make it seem like it's my brothers and he'll get another month but like also I feel like my brother would preemptively leave if he knew he couldn't come up with it so idk... it's really gonna be about timing but like

there's just something that's gonna want to die if he leaves and is on his own like I'll always feel guilty about that like... I'm not supposed to let shit like that happen and I'll be worried about him the entire fucking time so like honestly just hoping it doesn't come to that

that being said he floated the idea of just leaving anyway cos the threat of homelessness would like constantly be lingering over his head if he stayed and I can understand that fully but it's still like... I do think it's worth it to stay in the sense like it'd be better to save and stick it out until he felt he could support himself but also like I understand the deep desire to not be constantly worried about my father's emotional state to feel safe so idk

I'm just like... this is going to stain my heart in away I won't know the effect of and like just the fear of my brother having to take care of himself like that already and figuring that stuff out like I don't know that it wouldn't be hard as fuck I mean obviously it would but I mean... I know it would change him drastically and it is basically trial by fire for adulthood and like babe you just became legally one so idk I'm just fuckin raw about it rn

and like we haven't talked about it to anyone cthyjyi like our mom called yesterday and he didn't say anything and our sisters avoid the topic like and we have no one else after that and it's so excruciating ig

[pinkadork]

Its so weird wanting to be the chill calm person ive sought out to be for the past year give or take a few months, while also being extremely heated st shit still

Like its handled better sure, but i still feel it yknow

Like im livid about certain shit and I truly never think i’ll not be mad about it but its like

Fuck

I cant explain shit for shit

I wanted to die months ago and not much has shifted.

I miss waking up and having hope of things changing and getting better just because you were w me. It was all perspective really, i never thought or imagined i’d be in a relationship of sny meaning. A few long distance and high school romances ig but i never thought id like, be someones person. A lot of relationships sound me didnt work and the ones that did, didn’t really, so when we worked out or i guess while we worked out, I started viewing things differently, i got defensive, felt insulted because i knew how much smarter you were and always felt i was trying to prove i even had a brain.

I dont keep it secret ive been on off homeless, this that, whatever, point being i got used to being in shitty conditions to where certain things that should definitely bother me didn’t. Living in the nightmare version of my childhood home, with the loml wasnt ideal nor what i wanted, even less with my boneheaded friends from hs. There was a time i convinced myself shit made sense but its been so much inbetween i cant even see what i saw then or what we were going for because nigga

I thought after we got out of there we like solid atp

Several deaths, a pandemic, my nigga fell in the floor, we fought rats, had infighting with each other, roommates, episodes all that bs that nigga we tight now, like fuck can really break us?

Me.

Its always been me

People wonder why im not over it or why i dont hate my ex or whatever but its like, that was the first real relationship (including family and friends because even my vets were in there shakiest eras) and I cared so much but like in a negative way, I thought we had to spend time together all the time, I love being by their side, yet I also ruined everything because I was so bothered by how every out of context thing would look that I ended up paintint the shitty picture everyone wanted out us anyway

I don't want to forget anymore, I don't wanna rush past it or act like it didn't happen or that I'm incapable of being the scum of the earth and that " everyone's wrong but me" I just want you

I need you

No creepy ish I hope but nigga

fuck

[ch1-kasak0]

@flutters-to-cuppers

AO3

Bendy straw Drabbles - Shaden-freude

(Primarily fluff, didn't notice anything but there might be swearing, unconfirmed)

Bendy straw OG version story, bad ending version - Yosnap

(I barely skinned over it, seems neutral aside from £-#++_ type censored swearing)

Hell's Demon Duo - Swis_Cheez

(Pretty neutral, some angst. Maybe a slight suggestive tone at some point during chapter 9, overall neutral)

Contracts Schaden_freude

(Chaotic to say the least?? Idek, one minute they were betting on smth, the next they were kissing, bendy wants to get physical but cup doesnt, bendy finds contracts, demon cup fights bendy, bendy make a deal, but bc bendy doesn't have a soul it doesn't bind and bendy destroys cups contract, they cuddle and then they randomly decide they want to do it for the first time and the ending is them racing to the bedroom before anything can happen???? Chaos idk, I personally wouldn't recommend that was really random)

Fragile//H3arts&St4rs AU - SCATT3R_BRAIN3D

Summary:

Bendy wonders why Cuphead wears gloves, and if being made out of porcelain has something to do with it. Cuphead gets a bit insecure though.. but Bendy is there to comfort him. :) <3

(Had to put in the summary, but oh my god this was adorable.. 🙏10/10 would read again)

Wattpad

I'm not even gonna try so some head canons as a bonus ig idk, mainly on bendy straw as a ship idk

• they like to sunbathe together, bendy likes the sun and cup is one beam of sunlight away from evaporating (healthy x sick canon🥳)

• cup always tries to tickle bendy when he's upset, when that doesn't work he tries to do what he usually does (brute force trauma healing beam GO!!), and if THAT doesn't work he'll just sit with bendy silently and rub circles in his back and hug him

•bendy looks fucking ridiculous in anything he wears that belongs to cup, he always looks like a medieval homeless orphan child (I mean he kinda is but he looks more like it)

•if they ever got together cup would 110% randomly pick up bendy, lather him in kisses and carry him around like a teddy bear

• bendy can purr, and cups lungs are horrific enough that his humming sounds like purring if he tries hard enough, purring bros🙏🙏💪💪

• cup really likes old homeless cats and spends hours on the streets petting them, it's very common that he runs back to the house and straight to his room sobbing bc he had to leave a cat in an alley bc he couldn't take it home, later that day bendy cme back with that old ass cat and like 3 more randoms and took them to cups room, very bluntly stated that they were cups responsibilty if he wanted to keep him, that night cup had never cried so hard out of pure joy and spent like an hour thanking bendy like he just saved mugs life

• occasionally fall asleep stargazing bc cup cannot shut up about astronomy and bendy likes yappers💪💪💪

• share milkshakes and are adorable about it, but bc of their height difference cup sometimes has to lean over to get a sip and chokes every time😔

• bendy likes tracing his finger over cups various scars and cracks on his hands and arms and wtv, cup always gets flustered about it and tries to hide in his turtleneck or whatever's closest

•they both share a love language which is words of affirmation, while bendy also woukd rather help him out with various things (acts of service)and cup prefers just spending time with him (quality time + physical touch but I couldn't think of a scenario)

• cuddles, they like cuddles🙏

So uhm, this week's chapter has left me very distraught, I'm gonna need like a couple hours of business leave to process what just happened today

[wonderingwanderingsworld]

Having weird feelings today. I am staying in more and more, just scared to leave my room or interact with people. It doesn’t feel healthy. I actually do want to be around people, I just want to be safe??? Anyways. I saw there’s gonna be a local vigil for Nex Benedict. I was thinking about going and clicked on one of the organizers’ names. I would say this person is a semi-celebrity in trans circles. Anyways this person has blocked me??!!!! I was quite taken aback, this is two days in a row I have found out I’m blocked by big accounts. I literally can’t remember ever having an interaction with this person. I think they liked something in my IG stories a couple years ago and I thought it was strange; even intimidating that a big account like theirs would do that. But otherwise I can’t think of anything.

I told a friend about it and they were like, hmmm I think it might be because of your stance against racism. Which honestly is the case with the other account that blocked me - that I know for a fact. I looked into this person and they seem to have moments where they’re fighting racism but then they backtrack or don’t make sense. I mean, I think most white people don’t make sense when it comes to racism. Including me, definitely. There is so much to unpack, make reparations for, work to change, it is massive. As a group we are not there, we are not even close to there, we don’t even wanna be there. Not saying there aren’t those of us who want change, but there is a massive gap between our desires and our actions. I know for myself I’m scared of the consequences of really going all out against racism; part of me wants to stay quiet or not “push it too far” for fear of being alienated and alone. I guess that’s part of what I wanna talk about here.

I don’t know how to have community right now. Most other white people do not want what I want, and when I spend time with them anyway they drag me back or make me doubt myself. But when I hang out with BIPOC folks I feel like I’m too serious and intense about racism in a way that centers myself when they just wanna hang out and have a good time. I don’t know how to navigate or regulate this. I want community that I love and loves me back. How do I do this as a white person who aspires to be antiracist?? I feel like if I could even get a few solid folks in my circle I wouldn’t be so swayed by the others. It makes me think about how often my sense of reality has been played with. I hate it.

Even when it comes to showing up to actions etc, I feel like damn, if I just knew *one person* to go with. If I just had one person I could process with. I can feel myself getting sleepy writing this which usually means I’m getting overwhelmed. I want to understand better my place in all this and how best to act. I find it very confusing.

Like for example with Palestine. At the beginning it felt scary but also liberating to post so much. I went to protests. I called and wrote to representatives. But then it started affecting my health. I got high blood pressure. Now I’m having kidney issues. So I should pull back right? But then I think, is my life more valuable than Palestinians’? I don’t think so. So what does it matter if I live or die for their cause? They die all the time. But for me it feels… I don’t know. Like they would die a noble death, whereas I would just die quietly in a corner without anyone knowing or caring why. It would be for nothing. And not even as a journalist or something, just as some trans guy in a homeless shelter who cared. So why does it matter.

I remember when I came to the witch community before I really thought I had found my people. They were political, supposedly. They cared about justice, supposedly. What I found was burnt out white activists who had decided they were “done” and would get angry, defensive or demeaning when topics around racism or even transphobia were brought up. It did not feel like my people so I left. But where am I now??? Cast adrift.

I don’t know where to go now but I’m trying. Everywhere is imperfect. But I hope to find a space that is better suited to me. Where more of the people have the same priorities. I’m not sure how to make that happen but I wanna try.

[nighthaterfrfr]

dirty dudes must die will forever stay 🔛🔝 in my head, but musically wise, high school is killin me, hatchetown, literal monster, and if i loved u. literally godly they are

grace had me laughing the whole time, and so did max, but grace is the best

personally i love the motif, but cool as i think i am is jst not it for me, when all the other songs are bangers

ruth and all her jokes made me uncomfy, but rewatching it and relistening to just for once had me warm up. a little bit

detective shapiro!!!

i mean, pete kinda did look like that homeless guy in downtown than a ghost

best of u, i didnt get it at all when i first watched it, but it was prob one of the best penultimate songs put for smth. rlly sets u for a happy ending in hatchetfield. el em ay oh

just for once imo, jst didnt rlly vibe w it, which sucks bc of how good lauren was

i can only say bury the bully bc of how funny the switch up was from bully the bully. especially mariah in that chorus where SHE LAYERS W HER LATE ENTRANCE ‼️‼️

(holyghost) max and grace, but only as the most dysfunctional couple. also consider, a (sorta) onesided grace and steph and how funny that would be

2nd, below tgwdlm and above bf ig lol

if none of this did happen, max would totally try to go to grace’s church and impress her by being so holy. it did for a second. till he got kicked out during offering.

AW I DIDNT THINK THERED BE A SKELE’UN HERE… / GRACE IS HAVING SEX W A FUCKIN GHOST! / and ofc, MAH BBQ!

dude that feeling i got when grace revealed she had the book and told jason he’s not the first victim after max got me w the uneasiest feeling

nibbly is jst serving so much here. love it for him

i could go on and on discuss religious symbolism w grace, but honestly, if we see her again in this state, i will fully be unleashed. this stuff was super fun, and the best introduction to starkid w the help of angela lmaooo

NPMD Ask Game!

Favorite song? 🎶

Favorite main character? 😍

Least favorite song? 🤨

Least favorite character? 😠

Favorite minor character? 🧍

Favorite Hatchetfield reference? 💙

Song you didn’t like at first that grew on you? 🎵

Overrated song? 🙄

Underrated song? 🫣

Favorite ship? 🥰

Where do you rank NPMD in terms of the Hatchetfield musicals? 💚

Favorite headcanon? 💭

Favorite and/or funniest part of the show? 🫶🏻

Least favorite and/or saddest part of the show? ❤️‍🩹

Favorite Lord in Black? 👻

Free space - talk about whatever you want! ✅

[alonelymidwestdreamer]

fuckin peachy

———

i really thought i could do it

i dont know why

well, no

fuck that

i do know why

i thought i could get my shit together, finally, because people are supporting me

because im not keeping myself in a shitty relationship

because im forcing myself to sit with just myself and learn to be ok with that

because im trying to be a good person

because i was making fucking progress

i was taking steps

someone, maybe everyone, is gonna say that progress isnt linear

but have you ever been forced off road after just getting off a detour, just getting used to a nice straight highway

it doesnt still feel like progress

in fact, it feels like why not take another drink, why not feel good instead of crying over a cancellation

it feels like why not pick that pocket knife back up, why not take a hammer to your knuckles till theyre all purple

why not see if that one girl you ruined ur life for over and over finally has u unblocked

it doesnt feel like progress

it feels like derailment

im losing my fucking mind

ive been watching this show

its sadder than hell but i can’t stop watching it

it reminds me of that girl who i, yk, ruined my life over

she was a pisces

it reminds me of her because it reminds me of all the trauma she sat through with me

it reminds me of being homeless and of my parents fights and my fights with my parents and just

everything

it reminds me of things i buried pretty damn deep

this show triggers the fuck out of me

i cant sit with myself reliving this shit, but she sat through all that with me as it happened

she was the only constant in my life for so many years

but me wanting to get better was the breaking point

that was the line

we used to scream at each other

shed trigger me on purpose when i made her mad

how fucked up is that

but when i wanted to fix myself, when i wanted to create a life that could hold her and i both in it without all the fucking anger

that was that

she still has me blocked

i havent told almost anyone, although now youll all know, but i made a new account, just to try to talk to her

when someones in ur life for so long and so deeply it just feels wrong when they leave

or maybe thats just me

i hadnt talked to her in like two years?

i just wanted to know what her life looks like now

she did not believe that

and shes still mad at me

ig i never realized she ruined her life over me too

when i asked how she was she said “what are you drunk or something?”

i really thought i could do it, i thought i could be ok

i just wanna get drunk

all the time

i wish i was drunk when i messaged her

i wish she was right

i wished a little too hard ig cuz i did start drinking again

i keep pretending its not all i think about

its not that serious, cant be

if it was that serious someone would notice right?

being drunk doesnt even feel great anymore

but if im gonna fuck up by just existing, at least i get an excuse if im shitfaced

i tried so hard

i mean im still trying

but every day i get closer to doing it again and again and again

isnt that embarrassing?

i dont like it, i dont want to

i just also dont like me very much

and who would even care

no one noticed the first time until i told them, i think honestly everyone preferred me buzzed all the time until they knew thats what it was

no one knew i was overdosing in bledsoes room either tho

sitting behind keleah in college algebra trig

the room spinning so violently i thought i was dying

i guess i was dying technically

after, i sat in the rose garden with someone and tried to breathe

i walked my siblings home

i thought i was gonna die

no one even knew

i went home and threw up four or five times

i threw up so much i thought i was gonna suffocate cuz i couldnt catch a breath

my mom didnt even ask why i threw up

so at least its just drinking again

and its not as frequent anyways

fuck i really was doing so good

i swear i was