#But rop writers I’m begging you

[marchioness-of-the-flowers]

Why do the rings of power writers try to make all the dialogue quotable, you can’t go a minute without some.

“Though you might find yourself in the shadow of the ballsack, one must only travel up the peepee to see the light.”

Type nonsense

[fanficlibrary-world]

Rings of Power: 5 Reasons It’s Not a Good Show and the 1 Good Thing About It

*Sigh*  I had such high hopes when it was first announced that we were getting an LoTR series.  Was so excited when the speculation was that it was going to be a story in the First or Second Age.  Thrilled at the idea of Galadriel being the lead character.  Expectations were quickly tempered with the first preview.  And now I can say all of my fears of what that first peak hinted have came to pass.  

First things first, I’m nowhere near a Tolkien scholar.  I know only a small bit, but I know enough of cannon for me to have expectations of certain characters.  And, I know that’s partially a me problem, but seriously, if you’re going to say that you’re doing Galadriel in the Second Age, I don’t think it’s completely my fault that I’m disappointed that I didn’t get anything like what I expected.  You chose to make your main character Galadriel as opposed to making up an OC.  And I get that was for name recognition, but that also means you’re setting expectations, which the writers definitely did not fulfill.  Regardless of expectations, though, RoP just isn’t a good show.  I spoken to a friend a lot about this and I’ve said as an LotR show, it’s bad, but even if it were just a run of the mill fantasy show, it would be mediocre, at best.  And here’s why - and, yes, here be spoilers! 

5. …because plot 

What I mean by this is too much in this series happens because they’re just looking to move the plot along.  Arondir gets captured but we need him back with Bronwyn and in the fight, so just have Adar let him go.  We want Galadriel to return to Middle Earth in glory so let’s have Mirel do a complete 180 because the leaves are falling from the tree.  Galadriel’s only hope to keep Mirel and Numenor in the fight is for Halbrand to agree to return as a king so does, even though, two episodes ago he was begging Galadriel to let him live in peace.  Oh, and Halbrand is Sauron, so, why the hell did he save Galadriel from drowning in the first place?  There’s no rational reason for these decisions.  And really, it cheapens things.   Nothing seems earned.  Everything just goes the way it needs to because plot. 

4. You know they live forever, right? 

From (almost) the moment they introduced Celebrimbor, I was mystified at how they had him act.  All of his bluster about wanting to do something great, to create something great.  He sounds like mortal man who’s realizing that his days are numbered and wants to ensure he leaves a legacy.  (And, I’m going to speculate, he’s likely to cause a lot of trouble in the pursuit of this.)  It was the most nonsensical

thing.  Not only because, as the title says, elves live forever so I can’t really see legacy being something they worry about, but also this guy is Feanor’s grandson.  If there’s anyone that should know better about the danger and price of chasing greatness, it should be that guy!  

Also, this guy is apparently the greatest smith of his time and he doesn’t even know how to combine alloys…

3. 2 + 2 = 5? 

Okay, I know that at times we have to suspend belief and that movie physics, movie time and space don’t always correspond to the real world, but RoP took that to the extreme.  Right from episode one, Galadriel tries to swim back to Middle Earth from Valinor?!?  (Also, that little boat that they shoved the elves in to go to Valinor seemed rather small and uncomfortable for a journey of that length.)  Then, of course, you have the Numenorians arriving in the village just on time.  Forget suspending belief because heroes always arrive in the nick of time, how did they even know where to go?  Also, horses cannot continually gallop.  And they can only travel like 35 miles in a day, tops.  And considering they were carrying fully armoured soldiers, I’m gonna say that those horses aren’t going to manage even that.  And, of course, all of that came over on 3 boat

2. That’s not how Valinor works!

Okay, this is a cannon thing, but I really can’t get over this whole Valinor is like Heaven.  A reward for elves who’ve done enough good.  Just no.  Elves we’re never meant to stay in Middle Earth.  Middle Earth is for men.  And no elf, no matter how powerful can declare who returns to Valinor and who stays.  The call of the gulls, the pull of the sea, this is what calls elves home into the west.  Well, that and the Valar.

Strong Female Character TM

And, yes, Galadriel, or this character that they’ve named Galadriel, is the absolute worst part of this show.  Note, this has nothing to do with the actress.  She works with what she gets, which unfortunately is all the worst traits of a stereotypical “strong female character”.  Angry, entitled, self absorbed, and always convinced that she is right.  Throws a tantrum every time she doesn’t get her way.  This is who the writers decided the Galadriel of this verse would be.  What a travesty!  

They took a character who should be wise, powerful, well respected, with over two millennia of life experience and an understanding that the past cannot be changed and the future will be what it will be, the character described as “the greatest of all elven women”, and slapped her name on a whiny brat.  And the worst part is, none of her flaws are actually presented as flaws.  She’s rarely gets called out on her terrible and hypocritical behaviour, and worse, she gets rewarded for it.  

Her behaviour and the way she gets away with everything means that I don’t have one ounce of sympathy for her.  I don’t care about her loss.  I don’t care about her grief.  Because she hasn’t shown that she actually cares about anybody else’s.  Instead, I spent most of my time yelling at her character, “Not everything is about you!”  

Honestly, at this point, I’m almost Team Sauron, because at least his character has the potential to be fun.  

The One Plus

I’ve written off RoP and will not be tuning into season 2, but there is one thing I will miss and that’s Elrond and Durin and their friendship.  Maybe that’s three things, but seriously, this plot line is everything that I wish the rest of the series was.  Two mature characters who aren’t perfect but have good hearts and put their ppl and their friendship first.  Naturally, conflict comes out of these competing interests, but they deal with them with honesty, and it’s refreshing.  No self-righteousness, no presenting them lying (even if inadvertently) to each other as right or doing the wrong thing but it’s for the right reasons.  Just truth, understanding, and faith in their friendship.  

These are the two I root for, that I feel for, that I worry for.  I know Elrond has to survive but I worry for him because I care.  And I don’t even want to think about what happens to Durin.  I’d take a whole series dedicated to just these two, and Disa!  And, honestly, it’s frustrating because I consider this plot line, these characters, these relationships to be amazing, and if the show were even mediocre I might consider tuning into S2 just for them.  But it doesn’t even reach that bar.  So I wish you Namárië, Rings of Power.  Though I don’t have much hope of you being good, if I did would have stuck around.