#But my journal is not where I am rn
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daydreamdoodles · 3 months ago
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I'm still mad. It's still eating at my insides. I know I eventually will let it go, but I'm so bad at that and I just can't help to hold on to it.
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leapdayowo · 28 days ago
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Redstone and Skulk ch. 43
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Had to draw this moment cuz it’s been eating away at my brain since I read it😭 Next on my list is EB giving them a hug
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katierosefun · 2 months ago
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me, telling myself to journal: damn that sucks. this sucks. i don't wanna journal. i don't wanna write about my feelings
me, while journaling: damn this rocks. i can just keep going for hours and hours and hours. who tf knew i had this much in my head
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aeolianblues · 3 months ago
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I'm not an extrovert. At all. In everyday life, I'm a yapper, sure, but I need someone to first assure me I am okay to yap, so I don't start conversations, even when I really want to join in sometimes! It's just the social anxiety acting up. God knows where from and why I lose a lot of my inhibitions when it comes to talking to people about music. I don't know where the confidence has suddenly sprung from. I've made a crazy amount of friends in musical circles, either just talking to people about common music or (since it is after all in music circles) talking to bands about their own music. I let out a sigh of relief any time an interaction goes well, because in truth it's going against my every instinct. I wish I could do that in everyday life
#like that's the point where we need to remind everyone around me that as much as I say#radio is 'a job'-- it's not 'my job' lol. I wish I was this interested in data science#but like. Honestly?? I'm not even a data scientist!? I answered a few questions about classical AI having come from a computer science back#background and now people are saying to me 'I know you're a data scientist and not a programmer' sir I am a computer scientist#what are you on about#and like I guess I get to google things and they're paying me so I'm not complaining but like I am not a data scientist#my biggest data scientist moment was when I asked 'do things in data science ever make sense???' and a bunch of data scientists went#'no :) Welcome to the club' ???????#why did I do a whole ass computer science degree then. Does anyone at all even want that anymore. Has everything in the realm of#computer science just been Solved. What of all the problems I learned and researched about. Which were cool. Are they just dead#Ugh the worst thing the AI hype has done rn is it has genuinely required everyone to pretend they're a data scientist#even MORE than before. I hate this#anyway; I wish I didn't hate it and I was curious and talked to many people in the field#like it's tragicomedy when every person I meet in music is like 'you've got to pursue this man you're a great interviewer blah blah blah'#and like I appreciate that this is coming from people who themselves have/are taking a chance on life#but. I kinda feel like my career does not exist anymore realistically so unless 1) commercial radio gets less shitty FAST#2) media companies that are laying off 50% of their staff miraculously stop or 3) Tom Power is suddenly feeling generous and wants#a completely unknown idiot to step into the biggest fucking culture show in the country (that I am in no way qualified for)#yeah there's very very little else. There's nothing else lol#Our country does not hype. They don't really care for who you are. f you make a decent connection with them musically they will come to you#Canada does not make heroes out of its talent. They will not be putting money into any of that. Greenlight in your dreams.#this is something I've been told (and seen) multiple times. We'll see it next week-- there are Olympic medallists returning to uni next wee#no one cares: the phrase is 'America makes celebrities out of their sportspeople'; we do not. Replace sportspeople with any public professi#Canada does not care for press about their musicians. The only reason NME sold here was because Anglophilia not because of music journalism#anyway; personal
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highwaydiamonds · 2 years ago
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Bit of art journaling I completed playing with today (though bits and bobs of it have been drawn and worked on over time) includes some drawing, direct to paper work with inks, accents with metallic acrylographs, and clearly lots of collage messing about.
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ohno-pleasure · 11 months ago
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I am so stupidly passionate about Fury Road, like for real if you don't think this movie is the tightest shit ever get out of my face.
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bunnihearted · 1 year ago
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🎚🥀⛓
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lemonnbug · 1 year ago
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hiiii😊 pretend I didn't randomly dip without warning lmao
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therosevest · 2 years ago
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things have not been normal. im so tired.
#i nap all the fucking time cause im so tired and my body is like making me get rest one way or another but then i wake up#and everything is still just waaagghghghggh you know. i am fucking sick of it!#i am not just a normal amount of tired i have been on the verge of shutdown since at least mid semester hanging on by a fucking#pinky nail like im going to be fucking insane. i NEED a break. if i need to check into a psych place to have that happen so be it#one way or another yall will leave me ALONE.#tired of people holding it over my head like when they've done shit lately esp when it's bc of how badly ive been fucking struggling#im not just being lazy!!!! im losing it!!!!! and that makes me feel like i cant reach out or rely on others cause i'll always fucking owe#them something or im always gonna be on thin ice in potentially fucking things up#like i need two seconds to get back to myself i need time to reconnect i cant fucking do this anymore#i love myself i dont like how im acting rn bc im just desperately in need of a break#and god yeah fucking arent we all but i need someone to see that it's bad and just. Be with that. not shame me or make me feel like shit#or fucking less of a person or like i need to like Bring it down a notch or whatever idfk.#just kind of saying things now. i need to journal and cry i think.#abby talks#i dont LIKE napping my days away i dont like not having time to do things i enjoy other than like laying around watching stuff#or being on my phone but i have genuinely not had it in me to do anything else.#anyway. i think i seriously need to be okay with being 'meaner' aka just prioritizing MY feelings and being ok if people r mad at me#cause it honestly feels like ive gaslit myself so many times into thinking im crazy to the point where i struggle in the most basic#situations. uggggghh.
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phagodyke · 2 years ago
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another wellbeing appt this morning can't wait to have to lie through the skin of my teeth + play down how mentally ill I am once again bc despite how desperate I am for help I'm equally desperately scared of losing my autonomy
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violet-dragonfly · 4 months ago
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it’s that time of the year folks
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ame-to-ame · 4 months ago
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The heart wants toxic yuri and drunk calls and drunken confessions but the mind tells me to be a responsible adult living in the real world with a 9-5 😐
#why is this world so boring why can't i be an immortal witch who dies every night in the battlefield only to be cleaned up and resurrected#in secrecy from my gf who hates fighting but only to be found out to her horror and be cleaned and picked up by my gf every night#why can't healing magic exist in the form of girls kissing why can't i be puking flowers if im puking anyway#like healing and doing better is great but god is it boring lmao#i kinda miss how dramatic my first unofficial heartbreak was.. like that was bad for my health but very interesting for the plot#now instead i journal and play an instrument and don't talk to ppl abt how i feel and work a stable job and hang out with my friends#WHICH ARE NORMAL PEOPLE ACTIVITIES and i think it's good to be being a normal person rn but i haven't had a like. big dramatic cry yet.#i cried before the break up but i haven't really had a big sob or anything after it and part of me misses feeling the range of emotions#like i was angstier when i was 15 this experience has been so calm and muted it even surprises me i feel like i should feel more hurt abt it#alas i missed my best chance to like actually act heartbroken. like if i do anything now it's kinda gonna be more for the experience and bit#god it's the theatre kid in me lmao i just. i want to experience what it's like crying and calling drunk walking home in your friend's arms#but ig if ur w ur friends they wouldn't let u call ur ex? so ig walking home alone at night drunk and crying!#but that feels unsafe. so maybe just. drunk alone at home? but that also feels like a liability#what do u even say on the call? im drunk can u pick me up pls? 💀💀💀 i don't think that's gonna work.#ok god i need to stop thinking abt this lmao im gonna be tempted to do it for fun but aaa self control self control#think instead abt the independent project u have. and ur diagnostic score. and the fact that u already broke ur favorite shirt.#where do ppl get interesting lives. the older i get the more my life has settled down into some stable npc life which i do like. but still.#can't help but realize i live in a very different world than most ppl. my coworker constantly asks me how old i really am.
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maraczeks · 7 months ago
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#oomferinas what the freak i literally am so 💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘 cville trips r always SO fun n vibeful it was so beautiful and lovely i love my#friends i love her hugs so m uch wtf#apr 21 2024#<3333 mwah#stop no she's so cute and i literally can't her hugs are the bestest in the world#ohhhh ok lemme jot this down then i'll journal later like a sane stable person but i'm too tired rn n just wanna record#but srsly cville trips are LACED like the most joy and heart and love and excitement#i was scared like in sept i hyped myself for her to be there and she wouldn't be but OH MY i gasped when i walked in that auditorium#and her surpriseeee like seriously seriously seriously. she get so excited and it's the most ever of any person and it is so precious to see#someone be so excited to see u n like it was so magical her hugs r truly the bestest i'm so warm and comforted rn like that is my best frien#gahhh i love her#n i love twee n srah#idk she's just so !!!! she's literally whatever sound exclamation points make idkkkk.#3 hugs im so normal#n thenennnnnnn jaime texting me when i was on the way back to check in bc i wasn't at church im crine she's <3 so <3#no but fr it feels so LONG since i last saw them in feb her hugs r trulyuyy#AND BRUNCH WAS SO FUN#ugh lovely lovely lovely im so full of joy<3#AUGH why i am terrible at remembering to take photos omyyyy#literally every time i see her i forget so i have No photos this is so sad#apr 22 2024#wishing i were so so normal but i cannot stop playing it back in my mind mymemory is a movie#I CANT!!!!!!!!#apr 23 2024#two days later .... embarassing#seriously i just where's technology that lets you record exactly how a hug feels bc. bcccccc
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humbleanger · 1 year ago
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worries
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priniya · 2 months ago
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ᯓᡣ𐭩 GORGEOUS! ᡣ𐭩ᯓ
pairing. oscar piastri x leclerc!reader
summary. the youngest leclerc was known to be an outgoing, extroverted menace, but suddenly when she meets the new mclaren driver, she does something she never does — gets embarrassing.
notes. a fair warning for the google translated french.im sorry if it sucks 😭😭 its my first time doing something like this and i really hope u like it :3 ALSO??? OSCAR WIN IN BAKU WAS SO BEAUTIFUL THE OVERTAKE?? THE DEFENDING?? a great day for piastrination!!!!! (can you tell i totally dig x leclerc!reader??) send requests for more smaus pls :)
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yourusername
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liked by maxverstappen1, arthur_leclerc and 127 621 others.
yourusername spreading the rbr agenda on the streets of kyoto, because your girl finally graduated journalism and engineering with honours!
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arthur_leclerc charles just saw the jacket and had an aneurysm LMAO
user1 someone check on leclerc pls
charles_leclerc cant believe my OWN baby sister wears that in public
yourusername ill take it off once ferrari releases their own energy drink 👍
alexandrasaintmleux gorgeous as usual ❤️
yourusername please dump my brother and date me instead
yourusername please i beg you
yourusername JUST ONE CHANCE 😭😭😣😣😣😭😭
user2 yn is one of us
maxverstappen1 looking good in blue! 💙
loved by author!
yourbff girl land that job or you gon go broke soon with that red bull addiction 👎👎👎
user3 atp yn is sponsoring the team 😭
yourbff you bet she is, girl
user4 double major in such different things pop off queen
user5 need to see her in paddock cos i know the girl is bout to argue with ferrari engineers
yourusername bin*tto left ferrari cos he knew i would drag him down 😁😁😁
user6 love how we had to go thru the 2023 drought without the baby leclerc and now shes baaaack
user7 fr i missed the times when ferrari wasnt the only thing making charles miserable
user7 congratulations on graduating queen!!!! cant wait for the new vid or to see u at one of the races 🥺
user8 im sorry im really new to f1 stuff who is she and why are the drivers here? 😭
user9 this is charlies sister yn!! but she has her youtube channel where she used to post a lot of diff stuff! shes been living in japan for the past four years of her undergrad degrees but due to the workload she had a hiatus for a year 💔💔 u should check out her channel its so cool
arthur_leclerc
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liked by yourusername, oscarpiastri and 320 612 others.
arthur_leclerc good day in monaco today, changing professions to a photographer rn, what u think of that?
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user10 arthur you had one job to bring your sister to paddock…
user11 its just friday girl calm down
yourusername please restrain yourself from posting pictures of that ugly face you see in the mirror
yourusername …WHO IS IN THE SECOND SLIDE
yourusername ARTHUR ANSWER ME
yourusername my ovaries are quacking rn ARTHUR ANSWER ME
user12 not yn simping over oscar AND calling arthur ugly 😭😭😭
user13 shes so me tbh
charles_leclerc such a handsome man on the third slide 🔥🔥🔥
olliebearman why is yn tweaking like that 😭
yourusername cos he’s so pretty
oscarpiastri you were supposed to send me the picture not POST IT
user14 this is the guy yourusername 🔥‼️‼️
yourusername omg hes SO gorgeous
oscarpiastri thank you…?
arthur_leclerc yourusername please stop embarrassing the family name
yourusername
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liked by oscarpiastri, alex_albon and 101 892 others.
yourusername a quick pit stop in paris before the monaco course is broken!!!!!! (source: trust me bro 🙂‍↕️) drinking for my pookie dookiest brother to secure that pole and p1 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️
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yourusername dont let the caption fool you, i am NOT stopping drinking vodka red bull to make sure rbr doesn’t lose their biggest sponsor (me)
maxverstappen1 ty for your service 🫡🫡
yourusername no prob pookie, lecfosi by association but a red bull girlie at heart 😌😌
yourusername big thanks to the autocorrect ❤️❤️❤️ youre the real one babe 🔥🔥🔥
user15 wait till she realises oscar is in the likes…
user16 ohh the girl is gonna be so messy 😭😭😭
user16 im all for it tho 🔥
lilymhe WHAT A GORGEOUS GORGEOUS GIRL
alexandrasaintmleux face card is never denied!
user17 oscar in the likes 🥹🥹
yourusername WHO IS IN THE LIKES??????
yourusername NOO OH MY GOD HES HERE
yourusername HI YOURE SUPER CUTE oscarpiastri
user18 SHE TAGGED HIM LOL
user19 she really want that dick…
yourusername i just think hes cute that is NOT a crime
oscarpiastri i think you’re really cute too :)
yourusername HXJSKSJJDBDJSJS
yourusername sorry a red bull ran across my screen 😭
arthur_leclerc yourbff please tell her she’s not as slick as she thinks she is
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user20 what do you expect 😭😭 she probably partied all night before getting to monaco
user21 LMAOO RIGHT??? but if you watched her vids you know that the girl LOVES an opportunity for a party
user22 yn stronger than me because i’d kiss him on the spot
user23 alr weirdo… they JUST met
user24 he is probably weirded out like imagine meeting a girl who SIMPS over you in the insta comments… she needs to chill
user25 he won’t pick you 👎👎
user26 gtfo if he was weirded out he wouldnt be in the likes of her post or sayin he thinks shes cute lol
user27 the real gentleman out there 🥹🥹
user28 i need them together asap
user29 super delulu but i totally dig the golden retriever gf x polite black cat bf
user30 OMGGG I TOTALLY SEE THE VISION
user31 pls they just met and he was just being polite 👎 stop trying to get into their lives
yourusername
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liked by scuderiaferrari, charles_leclerc and 428 621 others.
yourusername HE DID IT!!!! I TOLD YALL THAT HE WOULD DO IT!!! MY BROTHER WINS IN MONACO. DONT HIT US UP FOR THE NEXT WEEK OR TWO!!! ITS CELEBRATION TIME!!!! aussi, charlie, il n'y a pas beaucoup de mots capables d'exprimer à quel point je suis fier de toi. vous l'avez fait et personne ne peut vous l'enlever.
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priniya translation! also, charlie — there isn’t an amount of words able to express how proud i am of you. you did it and no one can take it away from you.
user32 girlie might tell everyone she’s a red bull girl, but like the king sebastian once said, everyone is a ferrari fan even when they say they’re not or something like that 🔥🔥🔥
user33 CONGRATULATIONS CHARLES!!! FINALLY WON!!!
carlossainz55 ay cropped my ‘carlos p3’ out 😖😖
yourusername this is a celebration post for my pookiest brother you are IRRELEVANT rn
carlossainz55 that was harsh
yourusername win YOUR home race and i’ll post one 4 u 👍👍
charles_leclerc je t’aime mon lutin ❤️
yourusername je t’aime mon coco 🫶🫶🫶
oscarpiastri congratulations to the man of the day, such an honour to stand next to you on the podium xx
arthur_leclerc man you gotta stop commenting on her posts, she’s going insane rn
oscarpiastri i’m sorry…?
yourusername NO DONT BE SORRY DONT LISTEN TO HIM IM COMPLETELY SANE
yourusername oscarpiastri please keep interacting with me i’m gonna die if you listen to arthur
oscarpiastri i guess i gotta text you now and then to make sure you don’t die
yourusername please do that
user34 do they know we can see that??
user35 idc im eating this up
user36 oscaryn truthers rise and shine
user37 atp i cant tell if hes interested or if hes doing that for his own entertainment
user38 probably both
user39 i LOVE how a celebration post for charles turned into an opportunity to flirt with oscar 😭😭
user40 she is NOT stronger than me because if i had a chance i’d took it
user41 setting her priorities straight
oscarpiastri
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liked by landonorris, yourusername and 792 721 others.
oscarpiastri a quick but very much needed pit stop before zandvoort
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user42 someone check on yn ASAP
user43 yn one of us once again because we couldn’t bag oscar either 😭
user44 can yall stop talking abt that girl FOR ONCE no one gaf
landonorris looking good mate
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yourusername pls tell me you found more of these beautiful seashells and brought some back for me
oscarpiastri we did actually! y immediately thought abt you and picked the pretty ones
yourusername GOD. i love her give her a big hug from me
oscarpiastri will do maam 🫡🫡
user45 so it’s not yn in the pics?? NOOOOO
user46 my life is ruined rn
user47 throwing oscaryn into a memory box because oscar and his gf looks really cute together
charles_leclerc hope you had a great summer mate
oscarpiastri the best 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️
user48 what if they r just trolling us because this caption looks really similar to the one yn posted before monaco???
user49 OMGGG YOURE ONTO SOMETHING
user50 hopefully on the way to the psych ward because this is some delulu shit
user51 soft launch over the summer 🥹🥹 hes so cute
user52 whoever his girl is, i just hope they’re happy and yall should too!
yourusername also plsplspls can y send me the id to the top?? it looks so cute from the back
user53 girl he wont choose you stop trying so hard 😭😭
user54 they can be friends ? lol
user55 does someone knows who the girl is???? i need to know its not yn 😭😭
user56 georgerussell63 tell us what you know 🫵🫵
georgerussell63 🤐🤐🤐
alex_albon he’s actually crying and gritting his teeth because he’d LOVE to tell
gossipracegirl
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liked by georgerussell63, user57 and 87 621 others.
gossipracegirl a rumour has it that a driver for formula one with a number eighty one was seen getting cozy with one of his on-track rival’s little sister, while in a relationship. was it a drunken mistake or was it all planned?
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user58 something is really wrong with leclercs one is a homie hopper and second is a homewrecker LOL
user59 shouldve happened in monaco so the people could get detained for invading their priacy like wtf WHO CARES
user60 all she do is bring bad pr to oscar BOO👎👎👎
user61 nooo oscar pookie you were supposed to be free from drama 😭😭
user62 gr63 in the likes LMAOO
user63 not yn being a homewrecker girl i liked u sm 😭😭
user64 yall acting like she’s in the wrong ? it gotta be consensual if they looked that chill n happy
user65 no wonder why yn has been streaming olivia rodrigo RELIGIOUSLY
user66 isnt that some type of incest atp?
user67 LMAOO imagine making out with your brother’s adopted son
yourusername
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liked by pascale_leclerc, oscarpiastri and 273 811 others.
yourusername YALL THOUGHT. it was me all along :P i was giggling n kicking my feet pretending i know osco’s gf while it was ME. summer break vlog with osco coming up sooner than u think so please stop calling me a homewrecker 😖😖😖
also, girls don’t let anyone tell you otherwise, being yourself is what gets you an amazing guy even if your brother thinks youre embarrassing <3
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georgerussell63 ty for not SLACKING OFF anymore i barely could hold it inside 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫
yourusername you told HALF the grid be for real brother you DID NOT hold it inside
fransisca.gomes no way oscar bagged you before i could 😭😭😭😭
yourusername i’m always gonna be yours kiks no one could take you away from me <3
francisca.gomes <3
pierregasly really thought getting u a bf would mean you leave MY girl alone
yourusername thinking is not your best thing, stick to racing
user68 shit user48 YOU WERE RIGHT
user48 NEVER DOUBT ME BITCHES
user69 this text?? oh he is down bad for you girl
user70 i need all of those bitches who called yn a homewrecker to APOLOGISE like rn
oscarpiastri thank you for letting me be a part of your life like this
user71 i know the girl is GIGGLING rn
yourusername thank YOU for making a part of YOUR life
user72 get yourself a man who THANKS you for being with you
user73 oscar piastri is the MAN
user74 osco 🥹🥹
user75 theyre the cutest your honour
arthur_leclerc cant believe you two are actually together
arthur_leclerc what is WRONG with you oscarpiastri
user76 SO OPPOSITES DOES ATTRACT
charles_leclerc i feel like i should tear those adoption papers apart no?
user77 nicole and pascale in the likes omg the moms r proud 🥹
hattiepiastri i miss youuuu come back to aus soon
yourusername I MISS YOU TOO 😭😭 i’ll be back soon!!
lorenzotl ❤️❤️❤️
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lilymhe double date when?
yourusername mark your calendar, we’ll be there 🫶
user78 does it mean we lose our favorite rbr girlie? 😭😭😭😖😖
user79 mclaren YOU TOOK HER AWAY FROM US 🫵
yourusername i am NOT wearing that ugly orange for a MAN (even if hes super gorgeous and sweet)
mclaren ☹️☹️☹️
landonorris it’s papaya
yourusername “it’s papaya” ☝️🤓
landonorris oscarpiastri please break up with her or you’re gonna be paying for my therapy
oscarpiastri send the bill mate, i’m in for the longest ride possible here
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ghostpunkrock · 2 years ago
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did you all know that being alone in a city you don’t recognize is scary
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