#But I post about shit online and then I can't help but go along with the online contextt even though it's not how I fucking want it to be

[seventh-district]

again and again i find myself lamenting that audio roleplay isn't taken more seriously by some people. like yeah, they often have a romantic element, and by nature they usually directly involve/address the listener- and i totally get that those things aren't to everyone's taste. no art or entertainment is universally appealing, and that's okay! but.. it still makes me a lil sad that the "cringe" reputation of asmr/audio rp precedes it. there's a whole lot of talent and creativity being poured into these audios by so many people that i feel goes unrecognized and/or disrespected simply due to the medium that the stories are being told through.

[hellohoihey]

Like I feel kinda shit for it but I truly do not have the energy to figure out based on fcking posts of someone's Instagram likes and like. The fucking actions of people they support to figure out whether it's "okay" to like them like I just can't

[thebreakfastgenie]

I'm not anti-vote or anything, but I think some of the liberals on here greatly overrate how much damage a bunch of bored kids (most of whom probably can't even legally vote) talking shit on social media can actually do to the Democrats. So what if they turn out braindead "Genocide Joe" memes by the thousands per week? No meaningful voter would pay attention to those, and anyone who does never had a vote worth chasing in the first place.

The problem is that it's not just a bunch of bored kids. It feeds a larger social media ecosystem. Remember "cancel culture?" Remember how that became a right wing talking point that conservatives whined about in mainstream settings? That has its roots on tumblr. If you ever doubted that fringe social media movements affect mainstream politics, 2024 should have been the final nail in the coffin. JD Vance has very signifcant (and, frankly, underreported) ties to online far right communities (known as "groypers" to the terminally online) and it absolutely influenced his campaign and now he's bringing those interests to the vice-presidency. Elon Musk (the owner of twitter) and Vivek Ramaswamy want to run a government office named DOGE after a meme. We're sharing the internet with the people in power; we're all playing with live ammo. It's often a ripple effect or butterfly effect, so it's very difficult to predict what memes and posts from "bored kids" will make it to real life politics and how they'll be transformed along the way. Because it's so hard to predict, we need to be aware of the possibility and act with care. "Genocide Joe" memes contributed to a general feeling of dissatisfaction with Biden that, intentionally or not, played into the Trump campaign's "everyone hates Biden" narrative. A similar thing happened with Hillary in 2016.

Elections are also won and lost on the margins. Campaigns spend billons on ground games that persuade a very small percentage of voters, but it's better to persuade that percentage than not to. If you don't know if something is going to make a difference, you act as if it is when the stakes are high. Is the drag from a constant negative social media narrative going to hurt a campaign? Maybe, and either way it's definitely not going to help, so it's better not to have it. 2016 and 2024 were both very close elections.

Liberals also tend to interpret bored kids' posts as statements of action. If someone says they don't want a Democrat to win, will try to stop it, and will tell other people not to vote for that candidate, liberals are going to object to that.

It's usually not "meaningful voters" who decide elections. It's low-information swing voters who make up their minds on the way to the voting booth. These voters are, consciously or unconsciously, often influenced by perceived popular opinion. A lot of people don't have deeply held values that they've spent time examining, but have moral compasses more akin to "if everyone I know thinks this, it must be right." The danger of social media is that is also distorts the meaning of "everyone I know." Your meme about how you hate Joe Biden finds its way into an algorithmically-generated bubble and someone says "gee, it seems like everyone I know hates Joe Biden, I generally trust my social circle, he must be really bad." And it's self-reinforcing. They start sharing it or making similar posts of their own and it spreads to their contacts in their own bubbles.

I don't think the exact mechanisms or limits or this phenomenon are fully understood yet because social media is still too new, but it's very real.

[olderthannetfic]

How do we feel about the "Um just so you know the person you reblogged this from is an [insert undesirables category here]"? When it's some random meme or otherwise uncontroversial post, and not some elaborate political opinion post with a bunch of dogwhistles in it.

Because I just got it from a fandom acquaintance/friend and it felt really fucking unsettling.

Aside from the mutuals that I know from fandom and interact with, most of the other content I interact with on Tumblr is more about what it says than about who said it for me. I don't ever pay attention to who wrote what or which other Tumblr users they had beef with or whatever, I just read the post itself and decide if I like what it says or not. If someone posts something I REALLY dislike, I block them and move on, more in the hopes of seeing less of that sort of thing than with the intention of somehow eliminating that specific person. I never pay attention to who my mutuals are reblogging from and if I note that one of them reblogged something featuring a poster who's famously unhinged, I just assume they don't know and move on because I know my mutuals are reasonable people generally speaking. I like the anonymity of Tumblr and the focus on the content of the posts and not on specific people. It's why I hang out here and not on one of the platforms that are all about influencers and the like.

So today I was going through the blogs of a couple of people I don't follow to find a specific post and in the process I saw a fairly uncontroversial post I liked, reblogged it, and moved on. Then less than an hour later I was met with a wall of text in my DMs accusing that poster of having questionable political opinions and describing the beef they had with another person where they threatened them etc. etc.

TBH I felt incredibly uncomfortable with the level of scrutiny implied in paying attention to who I reblog random shit from, as well as the level of presumption in coming to my DMs and lecture me about it. I know nothing about the blogger they were talking about, have never interacted with him, and will probably never even have the opportunity or the desire to interact with him. He wasn't even the AUTHOR of the post, it was just on his profile. It makes me want to never post anything ever again.

I just... don't see the point of this sort of behaviour in general? "You shouldn't be giving [bad people] a platform" - look, I genuinely don't think that reblogging a pretty landscape from someone who turns out to be a TERF or whatever is platforming those beliefs in any way. I'm sorry, but I just don't see how my behaviour leads to any material harm to anyone. Even if I follow the person, the moment they start talking about TERF-y shit I'm gonna unfollow and/or block. The probability of me throwing all my well-developed political opinions down the drain and getting radicalized through the slippery slope of reblogging "CATS ARE SO CUTE WHEN THEY SWAT AT THINGS" from someone with a dogshit take about Palestine is literally zero. If it's the content of the post that's wrong, just explain why to me, or point out the dogwhistles or whatever. I'm open to being wrong in my opinions. I'm not open to my online friends acting like the fucking Stasi.

Maybe I'm just too old for these newfangled social politics but it just feels like either pointless catty high school drama or an attempt at social control that I can't help but interpret in a hostile manner. Even if it's followed by - as it was in my case - something along the lines of "obviously I'm not accusing YOU of anything!! I'm sorry it came off that way!!" when I pushed back against it. It feels like 1950s conservative housewives making sure you're not even greeting any of the town Undesirables at the grocery store, because you wouldn't want to be Morally Tainted by saying Hello to a divorcee!

It's kind of similar to the whole issue about people still writing HP fic. Am I interested in HP fic? TBH not at all - the author had soured it for me with her behaviour even before it was obvious how much she hated trans people. Do I think the people doing it are somehow harming anyone or putting money in JKR's pocket? I honestly can't see how, and so far none of the people adamantly against it have managed to explain it to me in a satisfying way, so I'm just gonna let it slide off me as another random internet hobby I don't get or care about.

--

My reaction is "Do you understand how Tumblr works? Do you?"

We have enough trouble with people reblogging barely-hidden anti-kink or homophobic shit. Who has time for cootie-based problems?

[keeksandgigz]

thinking of eddie helping you braid your hair when you’re getting ready to spend the night

made this about eddie and witchy because i cannot stop thinking about them- this is also for the anon who said they can't stop reading it (thank u hehehe)

fluffy fluff below the cut, witchy being jealous and thinking of hexing his exes <3

He had to drag you into his apartment.

In a hilarious turn of events, due to some kind of San Francisco strike, all metro routes were suspended and there was no way you were going to walk in heeled boots all the way to Twin Peaks.

"Why call an Uber, baby? You can literally come upstairs at mine" Eddie says, watching you huff as you read over the e-mail about the strike.

"No Eddie you don't understand. I need to be home. I have a whole ritual! And silk pillowcases! Why can't you just drive me?" you whine, hoping he'll fold to your requests like he always does.

He grabs you by the shoulders, giving you a tender look.

"Because, my lovely witchy, metro routes being down means there will be absolute pandemonium in the streets. And I'm not trying to stay fifteen minutes stuck in downhill traffic" he laughs as you follow him around the store.

He's still working, you got off an hour before and after walking around the vintage stores for an hour there wasn't much else to do. It's just him in the record shop, working the closing shift. You follow him around trying to convince him to drive you back as he puts back the vinyls in the milk crates, folds band t- shirts, and rearranges patches in the display case.

"C'mon, witchy, just go up. I have Chinese takeout from last night or spaghetti if you wanna cook, I'll stop by the hair place across the block to get you a silk pillowcase. Promise" he says, leaning over the counter to kiss your forehead he opens up the cash till.

"But Ed-" you whine, you've never slept outside of your apartment before.

"No buts, I'm sorry witchy. Now get your cute butt out of here, I've got money out" he says, puckering his lips, ready for a kiss.

You lean over the counter and give him a quick kiss before he hands you the keys to his apartment.

"Don't forget to call Lorraine to get her to feed Circe!" he exclaims before you're out the door. You roll your eyes, of course you'll call Lorraine, your neighbor, if Lorraine existed.

But he doesn't have to know you can feed Circe with a snap of your finger whenever you forget to leave food out in the morning.

So you groan and you go through the backdoor of the store to reach the small, dingy courtyard of his apartment. Second floor, apartment 5C.

This building is so old it doesn't even have an elevator. You reach the door and open it, the rattle of keys falling over the counter is the only sound that can be heard, along with the clack of the short heels of your boots.

You take your shoes off and go through his fridge. Day- old Chinese takeout, a carton of eggs and milk. Three cans of Sierra Nevada, a half- drunk bottle of Coke Zero. You open his freezer.

Honey walnut shrimp and fried rice from Trader Joe's, a bottle of vodka, and a tub of ice cream from the last time you were craving it.

You roll your eyes and pick up the phone.

"Hey Ed, you have jack shit in your fridge. Can you stop by the Greek place down the block? I’ll have a gyro with chicken and falafel on the side” you request, hearing his groan at another chore he has to do post closing.

“Baby the Chinese food in the fridge is pretty good, it’s from the place we always go to” he’s not very convincing, but he’s tired and now lost count of the cash he was counting.

“‘kay i’ll put an online order for it so you just have to go pick it up, sound good?” you ignore him.

“Ugh fine but I better get, like, the biggest kiss in return.“ he groans, but it’s true. He is a weak, weak man when it comes to you. “Get me the pita wrap with lamb and fries, and lemme also get seasoned fries on the side. Thank you witchy, love you gotta go” he says, hanging up the phone.

So you order the food and then sneak in Eddie's bedroom to change into something comfortable. Getting rid of that fine line when clothes felt too much like clothes, the stitching pressing into your skin, the cuffs of your sweater feeling a bit too tight against your wrists, your jeans too tight on your legs.

So you venture in his closet and steal a pair of sweats and a ratty black t- shirt. One of his many. You go to the bathroom and notice there's no mirror. This dude.

So you tie your hair away from your face and use the nice face wash you got him- which you're sure he rarely uses- and wipe the makeup off your face. You go look for a clean towel, 'cause God knows you will not be wiping your face with the hand towel sitting on the rod on the wall.

After your face is clean you plop yourself on the couch and watch TV to pass the time.

Thirty- odd minutes later a rattling of keys startles you. Eddie walks through the door with his arms full of plastic bags. He places them on the counter.

"Hey witchy, I see you've made yourself at home?" he says, as you walk towards him and bury yourself in his arms. At least he smelled nice.

"Hmmm missed you, Ed" you mutter against the fabric of his t- shirt.

"You missed me?" you give a little nod, followed by a hum. His heart beats a bit faster, it's nice knowing you think of him when he's away.

"Aw, witchy. I missed you too, are you hungry?" he says, giving you a sweet kiss on the head as he detaches from your grip and reaches for the bag with the food, taking out the boxes.

"Also stopped by the hair place, got you that silk pillowcase and some shampoo and conditioner to keep here. Doubt you'll wanna use my three in one shit" he snickers, and you blush timidly. He's not sweet in the way that he'll kiss you in the middle of the street, but he is for sure sweet in the way he thinks about you an embarrassing amount of times a day.

"Thanks Ed, you didn't have to do that" you say, and he blushes, the boy tinges himself pink because you appreciate him.

"Y'know, anything for you" he says, giving you a kiss on the forehead as he brings the takeout boxes to the coffee table.

You follow him and plop down on the couch "I was watching 'Sex and the City' while you were gone" you explain, biting into your gyro.

"Was Samantha being her usual crazy self?" he doesn't even know who Samantha is, but he thinks it's funny to ask you every time. You giggle as he puts on a random show for you to watch.

After an episode Eddie stands up and stretches.

"I'm beat, I think it's time for bed" he says "c'mon, witchy"

You rise from the couch and follow him into the master bathroom.

“I have a toothbrush here for you, I kinda uh-“ from his tone you can tell he’s embarrassed “I got one for here the first time you came over, in case you ever, y’know, wanted to sleep over” he says sheepishly, while you wrap your arms around him.

He offers it to you, it’s pink. Your favorite color.

“Aw, Ed. You’re so sweet, thank you” you say and you swear you can see him blush as you place a delicate kiss on his warming cheek.

This slice of domesticity taken away from the mystic vibe of your apartment really makes you wonder. It makes you think about a normal life, with him.

The way he washes his face like a madman (without face wash), letting the water wet his bangs instead of pulling his hair back, the way he ties his hair up before brushing his teeth.

You take the toothbrush out of your mouth "Ah shtill don' undestand why you don' have a mirrah" you sputter, mouth full as you spit the toothpaste in the sink.

"Why I don't have a mirror? Previous tenant broke it and my asshole landlord still won't fix it" he says, taking off his shirt. Your eyes linger on the lines of his back a little too long, bordering the line between looking and staring.

So you turn around and you try to braid your hair without a mirror, but to no avail, every strand seems to be three different sizes.

You groan in frustration as Eddie approaches you.

"Lemme help, witchy" he says, standing behind you and tending an arm out for a hair tie.

He divides the hair into three strands. Your hair is so soft between his fingers.

He wishes he could stall so that he could caress it for longer, but an impatient yawn escapes your mouth as his hands deftly get to work. Over, under, over, under-

"Where did you learn to braid hair?" you ask, feeling the way he softly holds each strand, making sure he's not pulling at your scalp. You don't see him, but a smile forms around his tongue, peeking out of his lips in concentration. Over, under.

"I had girlfriends before you, witchy. They taught me to braid my own hair" he chuckles, as you try to tune out the word girlfriends. Under, over, under.

He can see a pout form on your lips, he smiles.

"Why'd you need to braid your hair?" you huff, thinking of going on a spiraling rampage and hexing every one of his exes. Over.

"Well" he begins "one time, an ex braided my hair and it came out super curly, so I wanted to try it myself. Turns out it needs to stay in the braid for a while for that to happen" he shrugs.

Under, over, tie.

"All done," he announces, placing a kiss on the crown of your head.

"Thanks, Ed" you examine the braid, flinging it over your shoulder "looks really nice" you say, and give him a small kiss at the corner of his mouth.

He gets himself into bed. His bed is oddly comfortable and his sheets smell of laundry detergent.

"I might have been washing my sheets every other day in case you wanted to sleep over" he confesses, blushing, as he lifts his arm, opening the warmth of his chest to you.

"You" you give him a kiss "are literally" another kiss "the sweetest guy" another kiss "in the history of always" last kiss.

He gets flustered when you call him sweet, because under the hardening exterior of black chains and shirts with exploding heads and hooded skeletal figures, there's just a sweet guy who loves you and wants you to like him for being himself.

"Just want you to, you know, have a good experience with me" he says, caressing your head.

"You get an 11/10 Yelp rating, can't recommend to anyone, though. You seem to be preoccupied with a really cool girl, and it seems it's going to go on forever" you giggle, as he smiles and gives you a kiss.

"Go to sleep, cool girl. Goodnight, love you" he says, before turning off his lights.

"Goodnight, Ed" you say, turning over so he can spoon you.

"You have to say it back" he whispers in the quiet of the dark room.

"Right, sorry. I love you too, Ed" you correct yourself and close your eyes, falling into one of the best sleeps you've ever had in your life.

The morning after, Eddie wakes up to his landlord bringing in a new mirror, his hair extra curled and all his exes blocked on his social media. But he doesn't have to know about that last one.

[sgiandubh]

Hi, I don't know if you understand me or go through this, I would like to know your feeling about it.

After all this circus (which I can't take anymore and after a few years in the fandom) I can't stand Caitríona anymore. I swear I try, I swear I try to get excited about her projects. I swear I try to understand her reasons, her anger, her antipathy towards us all these years. For a long time I managed to suppress this sad feeling I feel for her, but now it screams. I can not anymore.

On the other hand, I still support Sam, even more than I should, because he, along with her, plays the main role in the narrative and is not a saint. I think these feelings would be the signal to leave the ship. I no longer admire her, I no longer miss her, at least on social media, I no longer even want to see her face.

I feel bad for feeling this way, I don't know what to do. Have you ever felt like that? And before you start offending me, I'll tell you: I'm not anti, only or whatever. I am someone who paid a lot of attention to this narrative and ended up hurt, very hurt by them, by her specially…

Dear Feel Bad Anon,

I was just about to go to bed after a very, very long and dense day, but your question stopped me in my tracks. Story of my life, really: that banging on the dorm's door at midnight ('it's vile X, we just broke up, help') - ah, the memories. So, I will not let you down.

First of all, thank you for this ask. It is a genuine one, I know it. It takes a lot of honesty to write it down without cackle, hysteria and the everlasting 'they owe me' refrain (no, they don't owe anybody anything, because, Anon, do you owe anybody anything when you are that much in love? I am sure you don't give a hoot about Aunt Y and Neighbor Z, Anon, and fuck them and their curiosity, eh?). And, my goodness, you really do sound exhausted, here.

Take a good look at this pic I took in Mandalay (see post below) of a Yama Zatdaw (Ramayana) puppet show:

All these public ten years are summed up in here: the puppeteers (TPTB), the puppets (S&C) and the convenient prop ( T) in the middle.

Where are the private ten years? I could think of this Amarapura pic, taken the day after the puppet show:

And that is ok, Anon. It's them. Their lives. Their love. We are just peepers through a keyhole, in here: let's try and do it gracefully.

You don't like C anymore? S couldn't give a damn about how you feel, Anon, and forgive me if I sound brutal. He loves her and he already did the unthinkable for her. C does give a damn about you, however. Not because she cares about you, but because she probably thinks your intelligence and your questioning endanger her narrative and put at risk all the negotiated perks. This is why she thought intelligent to bark at you and publicly insult you: by a simple zealot reflex, her part of the bargain. It has nothing to do with her private truth. You are disappointed by a puppet, not the real C. Or, using this time Plato's Allegory of the Cave, you are mad at the silhouettes reflected on the walls of that cave, not at the people whose reflections you see - those people are outside the cave.

Get out of that mental cave, Anon. Stop racking your brains off trying to give definitive answers that cannot be honestly given with the amount of information we have. Stop obsessing about a visibly curated social media presence, online times and all this shit - they mean very little, especially at this point in time. Trust your heart and your intuition. Trust your life experience. Trust yourself, not me. All this side of the fandom can offer you is based on our own life paths and street smarts. Do I think it's legit? Of course, otherwise I'd not be here or I'd be a pervert. Do I think that together we'd be a step closer to what really is? Oh, by all means. But you are the only sovereign master of the course, here. You are the only one able to choose between believing or rejecting, staying on deck or jumping ship.

I chose to be interested in the puppeteers, Anon. The paper trail. The minute intricacies. The boring details Mordor does not want to see or doesn't know how to translate in simple English. That is really what keeps me going and that is something I will never publicly trade. The more I look into it, the clearer the picture is. Oh, for sure, I take great pleasure in seeing and discussing the script inconsistencies - don't we all? But to me and as I see it, this is the tip of the iceberg. The bar I set myself for public happenings, statements and all the shit show is very low. It avoids undue disappointment and even allows me to be relaxed about it. Not always. Not a perfect strategy. But it is my way of managing it and so far, it works.

Take at least a day off Tumblr. Think of it as detox. I can guarantee you will see it way clearer. I wish you well, Anon. And I really hope my long, long answer helped at least a little bit.

[vaporwavedoggie]

Ahahahah I should probably explain why I'm not on here as much atm, along with most of my other social media.

It's gonna be long but I know I have some folks on here worried about me so I'll put everything under the cut.

Alright buckle up, this will get long.

To shorten things, my chronic pain is significantly getting worse very quickly, along with heart issues.

Not to mention my shit mental health.

But here's the long story:

There's something up with my heart. I don't know exactly what the diagnosis will be, I have a few more tests including a fun little holter monitor placement or whatever it's called.

It's where I wear this monitor over my heart for a few days and press a button whenever I start having flareups. My flareups consist of my blood pressure suddenly dropping very low (I think the lowest it was clocked was somewhere in the 80s/60s range if I remember correctly), headaches, bad chest pain, limb weakness/numbness, sudden exhaustion/passing out, etc.

They did an echo on my heart but the results didn't tell me much other than I have a dialated left atrium. No idea what that means, don't know if it's even related to the shit going on with me. I won't find out until the other tests are done and looked over.

I'm going as far as to try and give up cigarettes for the time being for this. My doc gave me a ton of nicotine patches, so I'm really hoping those will help with the urges. I'm going to be going from smoking about half a pack or so a day to patches that are 7mg of nic, so uhhh yeah.

Another reason why I'm distancing myself from online spaces more other than my personal discord servers is because stressful stuff, discourse, all that makes my flareups much much worse. I'm doing it not to be a bitch, but for my own health. So for a bit I'll probably only post art I occasionally draw n what not.

Now on to the other issues. My lower back keeps me in damn near constant chronic pain. They did an xray on it, and my MyChart (fun little doctor app) said this about their findings:

"Vertebral body heights and alignment are well-maintained. No fracture or subluxation. Pedicles are intact. Mild loss of disc height at L5-S1."

I'm not entirely sure if that's anything important, again, I go to my pcp about it in the beginning of October since there's a few more issues they'd like to test me for before coming to a diagnosis and treating me.

As for my back pain though, it's to the point where it's nearly disabling me physically.

I've had it for many years. Idk exactly when it all started, but I really started noticing it around the time I was 19-20. I have a theory it's because one of my first jobs that I worked for about a year was at a warehouse. It was very physical labor.

I'd be lifting heavy boxes constantly to the point where when I got home I couldn't bend down from the pain. I'd just have to flop down on my bed and pass out. And this went on about 4 days a week for a year.

At first, it started off as a small patch on my lower back, at the base of my spine, not being able to be touched. The gentlest poke would feel like stabbing pain. And it only got worse over the years, with the area spreading.

Now it's to the point where I can't stand for long, and when I sit or lay down I have to shift my position every 10-20 minutes or it flares up. And I dread going to sleep for a number of reasons. Not just because of the night terrors I have damn near every night due to my CPTSD, but because I wake up in excruciating pain most of the time due to not being able to shift my body in my sleep.

Worst part is, when I sleep, I'm dead to the world. If the night terrors aren't too horrible that night, I'm like a rock. No one can move me. Lord knows my husband has tried. And I'll sleep for about 12-20+ hours at a time at this point.

Funny thing is? No matter how much sleep I get, even if I get the base recommended amount without under or over sleeping, I'm ALWAYS exhausted.

My doc has sent a referral for me to get a sleep study but they have yet to reach out to me. I suspect this may also contribute to my heart issues but idk for sure.

So yeah. It's not enough that I deal with shitty mental health issues on a constant, but also chronic physical health issues as well.

Worst part is my family is borderline poverty. Despite everything I'm STILL trying to get a job because my family needs the money, along with others in the house, including my oldest son and teenage son.

Yet for whatever reason, everyone claims they're hiring, yet won't hire any of us. For me, I understand. I always struggled to keep a job due to various issues. But my sons have a completely clean slate, and my roomie has a great resume with plenty of long history, yet no one will hire anyone. Not even McDonald's.

People act like it's all us. We try everything we can, from dressing up in our nicest clothes for the interview, following up with the job, being friendly, giving the interviewer our skills. Worst part is they act like they're fucking impressed, then turn around and claim they've decided to go with someone more qualified for the position, or they're not hiring anymore.

Yes, I know I'll hurt myself if I try working a job and pushing myself beyond my limits every day, but it's taking too damn long for disability to do shit. Disability is very hard to get in Texas for whatever reason and God it's stupid. It usually takes a minimum of 2-3 years for most, and we don't have that time.

The price of rent, groceries, and everything else keeps skyrocketing, yet my roomies won't get a raise on their disability, my husband won't get a raise on his job other than just a few cents once a year.

We're living by the skin of our teeth. Paycheck to paycheck. Most of our food comes from various food banks in the area we make multiple trips to a week.

Then when it comes to my mental health issues, I'm handling it the best that I possibly can.

My CPTSD has been flaring up. Then there's the other shit going on with my head I won't get into.

I'm nearly constantly haunted by trauma and I'm so fucking tired of it. I have to keep myself busy or it creeps into my mind. And I have somnophobia because every time I sleep I'm almost guaranteed to have a night terror. No, prasosin won't help.

Anyways that's a small portion of the shit im going through and why I probably won't be online much until I get shit sorted out.

Is it weird to be the happiest you've ever been in your life, yet also the most miserable??

[sprinkleonthatcriticism]

A really gross mentality I've seen people having abt the recent Birdie situation is fucking gross and insensitive to the situation as a whole

People are spreading around scs of Jack saying the n word back in 2020... Which he already apologized for?? He's already apologized for his slur usage along with his racism and transphobic back in 2020 (along with apologizing for harassing everyone/condoning harassment of them) in his "i'm back" video (check the sections "I sucked in 2020 okay" "my racism + transphobia") and I get people are still mad about the Dragy part but that doesn't discredit the rest of the video and what happened...

But not only that, these people are using scs of JULIAN saying the n word and claiming it's birdie (granted, in some of the scs, Jack IS participating in racism with Jack but once again, this is shit from 2020) along with victimizing Julian, Malachi in ways that are fucking gross and unhealthy

Take, Malachi's recent grooming victim for example... The kid's going around saying he isn't/wasn't being groomed while saying that EVERYTHING MALACHI DID TO THE KID WAS THEIR OWN FAULT ANF ALL OF IT WAS JUST "dumb teenager behaviour" which makes me so fucking sad... They cannot see that the behaviours that Malachi was condoning and/or talking abt with the kid wasn't normal and was, indeed, grooming. What makes it even worse is the fact that these birdie drama people are FEEDING into this mentality with scs of the minor saying "Jack refused to talk to me or Malachi abt this situation and how it wasn't actually bad" (JACK HAS EVERY RIGHT TO IGNORE SOMEONE... I'LL COME BACK TO THIS)

Another thing I noticed are people's REFUSAL to see the bigger picture when it comes to the situations that have involved Jack for the past 8 years... (Referring back to the last anon post I made) I show them evidence that Julian, Malachi and Dragy are a bit shady/are showing really shitty behaviours (Mainly Malachi and Julian) and they say "See!!!! Birdie's bad!!" And decide that all of the evidence of Jack's "victims" making a big deal to get off to drama

Going onto Dragy's shitty behavior in regards to Jack... There are replies from her account STILL UP of her making fun of Jack's vent art abt Synni assaulting him... Which fucking disgusts me, in full honesty... Along with the fact that she responded to yippee's Bluesky thread VICTIMIZING the kid and trying to gaslight them into believing that they're a grooming victim...

Going back to Jack's rights to ignore someone... Yeah, that's a human right. But that's not okay!! He has to listen to his poor victims and air out their message!!!/sarc But then when these people refuse to let drama go and keep on dragging this shit on while making a point that they don't forgive Jack for hurting them (in the ways that he did) and they refuse to forgive him... Suddenly that's fine!! People don't always have to forgive him, you don't have to forgive someone for their actions!!! Let them keep making a fuss!!!!

If you can't tell, the birdie haters have a weird mentality where they're so keen on making Jack look bad that they're willing to ignore the supposed "new victims" they're getting "justice" for while putting the most fucked people on full blast to help them "talk about their experience" and ignore when people call them out for shitty behavior... There's apparently this WHOLE community of people who are digging through EVERY interaction Jack has had with people online to find any minor/ageless account he's interacted with and harassing them to try and get a grooming allegation out of them simply because they either interacted with birdie and/or made art for him and when they grab ALL of these interactions they say shit like "If you're one of the ageless accounts who've interacted with Jack and you come out saying that you're 18+... Sorry, but you're a minor in this situation and Jack has been grooming you" (Fun fact!! These people complain abt 15yo's interacting with Jack's art bcs he's 16+ but they also complain abt a 17yo interacting with his art saying "still a minor")

This has been a whole situation where people who've shown support for Jack in the past or have interacted with him or have made art of him are being harassed to oblivion because they want to get a grooming allegation to happen... Yippee being the first to because he was the one who made the art that got people worked up...

Srry for ranting... Just a shitty situation overall...

.

[starry-eyed-extraterrestrial]

So I said I had a one shot in mind for if Nikki didn't make his usual Mick birthday tweet, and it's already quite late so I don't think it's happening (late in America anyway, over here it's already seven am the next day) so here's that angst fic I promised.

It's six thirty when Mick finally decides to open twitter. He's just had cake with Seriana that she made herself along with his favourite kind of pasta and earlier that same day they'd gone out on a bit of a nature walk together, no real words shared between them just comfortable silence and the enjoyment of each other's company. And now, with his love in the kitchen washing the dishes,it was time to look through all the birthday wishes he'd gotten on social media today and thank everyone for taking time out of their day to think about him and congratulate him on becoming even more ancient then he already was.

He squints his eyes then adjusts his glasses on his face and pulls his iPad off the dining room table and closer to his face to actually be able to read what the people said. Shit, he probably needed to renew his glasses soon and get a stronger lens. Besides that little annoyance, the birthday wishes make him very happy and he can't help the smile that slips onto his face at the sheer amount of people who care about an old fossil like him.

After looking through most of the messages and posts Mick gets his keyboard out and ready to make a tweet of his own. He types the message out using two fingers and posts it right away.

“Thank you everybody for the happy birthday luv. Also many many thank you's for liking my solo stuff as well. 

Peace and love back to all of you👽”

He feels so glad in this moment and leans back in his chair to  just take a second to appreciate everything he has and everything he's accomplished.

The easy smile is wiped from his face however when a tiny intrusive thought slips into his mind. He looks down at his tablet again. Should he look…

No, it was stupid Nikki would have tagged him like he does every year when he wishes him happy birthday and since he didn't see Nikki's post between any of the other birthday posts and messages he knows he's not getting one this year. Or likely any year after this with how pissed Nikki is at him.

Mick and Nikki are the same in a lot of ways, but in one place they differ. Mick gets over things quickly and Nikki may forgive but he never forgets. So it's safe to say that the years of Nikki's annual birthday posts for him are just lost to time forever. 

That thought makes him.. uncomfortable is the only way he can describe it, not sad exactly, he'd known what he was getting himself into with the lawsuit in the first place,he just feels kinda weird about the whole situation. 

Does this mean he shouldn't wish him a happy birthday this year either- would it be weird now? Would his birthday wish to Nikki feel more like a birthday wish from a stranger to him? Mick contemplates this, but not for very long as he pulls his tablet closer to his face again.

Just to be safe, Mick searches Nikki's name in the spacebar, he's typing a lot slower then he usually would, he knows that it's because he doesn't want to see. Doesn't want to confirm that their relationship is so frayed that Nikki can't even wish him happy birthday online, nevermind to his face by FaceTiming him for a minute.

He doesn't want to know that he and Nikki will most likely never be close again and that their relationship will most likely never return to even a quarter of what it was, even if they did make up. He and Nikki would become like Tommy and Vince, the two of them best friends at some point only to years later only really speak to each other for business reasons and in interviews to save face in public. He didn't want that for him and Nikki, but if it had to be so then…he supposes it has to be so. He's certainly not gonna go crawling back to Nikki and apologise for something he's not even in the wrong for.

When Mick finally opens Nikki's page, he's not surprised to see no mention of him and he suddenly feels very stupid for thinking that there would be any message waiting for him at all. He's suing them for Christ sake, Nikki's hardly gonna jump at the chance to even think about him let alone wish him a happy birthday. 

Mick decides that that's enough internet for him for one day. He sets the tablet down on the table and suddenly feels quite out of sorts. He then feels two warm arms wrap around his shoulders.

“Hey baby, what's wrong?” Seriana whispered in his ear, making chills go up his spine. He feels better almost instantly.

“Nothing now that you're here” he says and he knows it's cheesy and he can feel serianna roll her eyes in amusement at his half joke.

The rest of the night Mick doesn't even think about it. Why should he?There's nothing he can physically do to change the outcome he just received, it's his own fault that it's like this anyway, so why complain really. 

But later that night when he's in bed and midnight rolled around, he was up staring at the ceiling, letting the knowledge that he and Nikki weren't friends anymore sink in and when it does all he can think about is how he probably shouldn't send a birthday wish to Nikki on his birthday. 

He knows Nikki doesn't like it when strangers get his number and message him.

[poppyandzena]

never thought about it exactly like this, but the Poppy story is:

I am a licensed therapist who literally markets myself as someone with a superior understanding of relationships, boundaries, mental health and polyamory.

I was in a 4 month online relationship with a woman who was constantly breaking my boundaries, not "showing up", not doing the work, and not doing any of the research I asked her to do.

None of that was enough for me to end the relationship, though. I couldn't, because I was transfixed my her being my FP, I was completely powerless. None of my therapy or skills could possibly have helped me with that at all. It's not MY responsibility.

Also, that woman repeatedly told me that she was not really into sex, which is really upsetting for me because I am hypersexual and identify as a succubus. I made that clear to her all the time. I attempted to tell her at least a dozen times that her expressing herself as having a low sexual interest (and then being ACE) was upsetting to me, but she never changed her mind about it to please me!

What a monster she was! It's not like I could have ended the relationship at any point! I couldn't! Even though I'm a licensed therapist with so much experience and skill, I had absolutely no options but to stay in this situation!

Then, we had this big fight right before this trip I was supposed to come on! Things were really tense for days, and she kept trying to break up with me.

Obviously I wasn't going to LET her just break up with me before we had a chance to meet in person! I already had all of these fantasies about us being together, and I put all of this weight on the importance of this trip! She wasn't allowed to just abandon it just because she had concerns and fears and because we were fighting!! She was just NOT SHOWING UP YET AGAIN! But I wasn't going to let that happen. So, yeah, I asked her to pretend for me and try to act like everything was fine, because it was better for me - but don't you see how manipulative SHE was being?

So we finally get to the hotel, and it's going fine, but I'm on edge the whole time because everything has been so weird, but she seems to not be bringing up the fights, so I guess everything is fine!

So that night, I initiate sex, because of course I do! And she goes along with it. And then I do it again later, and same thing.

So I think, GREAT! EVERYTHING IS GREAT!

She definitely wouldn't have had sex with me if everything wasn't great! Plus, it's not like she ever told me that she wasn't enthusiastic about sex in the past. She NEVER said before that she would really only do sex with me to please me!

So I was SHOCKED when everything went to shit the next day! Zena was just yelling and I then Noeh just tried to leave and finally did!

And then I started to think about it:

Wait... Why did Noeh leave? It couldn't have been because I did anything wrong!! Not me!

She must've only been there for the SEX and to test her feelings! OMG, yes! Looking back it, she was never listening to ME! I told her how important sex was to me, and she WEAPONIZED THAT! She used it as a TEST!

She TOOK ADVANTAGE OF ME!

I'm looking back now and realizing that for MONTHS I've been totally manic and out of my mind!

I COULDN'T HAVE CONSENTED!

AND NOEH SHOULD HAVE *KNOWN* THAT!

Me, the licensed therapist, couldn't even see it until now, but it's NOEH'S RESPONSIBILITY. Sure I've been posting videos and having relationships and giving my opinions - those are all still FINE! None of that was a problem, of course!

And Zena, who knows me better than anyone, ALSO couldn't see it! But it's NOEH'S RESPONSIBILITY!

But it's not like I'm saying we might have blind spots or be wrong or our opinion is an issue! No way! We're still the smartest people who know everything and won't listen to anyone's opinions!

We are always 100% right about everything but this one thing!

Because anyone who can't see the truth is an apologist. And the truth is clearly that:

This person I'd only known for 4 months online, during which I was apparently manic the ENTIRE TIME, obviously took advantage of their knowledge of me, and used that knowledge to just get something from me and move on!

If she didn't want to have that sex, or wasn't sure about it, it was 1,000% her responsibility to say it and turn me down. Sure, I'd told her a dozen times how much that would devastate me, but that's HER problem.

That's R*PE plain and simple.

^^ @noehflake

[stagkingswife]

Hey, I saw your post on disability and I have a doubt. I have ADHD, OCD, chronic depression, along with hypothyroidism, spondylitis, and gastritis. I am mostly high functioning and was considered a high achiever until I lost my job. I have had bad days when I find it impossible to leave the bed for weeks and I don't remember the last time I woke up feeling refreshed without any body pain. I mostly manage to get everything done before deadline, but that takes a heavy toll on both my physical and mental health. And most of the time I can't work without overdosing on my ADHD meds and painkillers.

My question is, umm, am I disabled?

When I said "send me asks" this is honestly not what I was expecting. I don't know if you're a follower of mine or not, but I'm a silly little witchcraft blog. I'll do my best here, Anon.

This is not a question I, or anyone else can answer for you. Identifying as disabled is a personal choice. If you do not feel disabled you do not have to identify as such. BUT, if you feel like your conditions have enough of an impact on your life.... then it's up to you. You can also be flexible in your phrasing if you wan to say you're mentally, but not physically. For some context I'm also a high achiever. I went to a Seven Sister college, graduated with a very respectable GPA. Now I'm earning a six figure salary in a highly competitive industry, and just landed a 5 figure bonus. My career is only looking up from here. I have an active social life, bot in person and online. But my average pain level is a 7/10. I walk with forearm crutches on my best days and use a wheelchair on anything less than the best. I'm just coming off a medication that truly wrecked me.

There's a lot of really impressive shit that I can do, and that I do well. But there's also a lot of normal every day stuff that I can't do, or struggle to do, or can't do without help. For example: I can build complex automation sequences for work, or discuss really in depth spiritual stuff here, but I can't go grocery shopping on my own, or drive on the highway, or stand in the shower. Sometimes I can't even get out of bed without help. If you aren't familiar with the social model of disability I really think you would benefit from looking into it. The gross oversimplification of it, in case you're unfamiliar, is that it's not about what your body or mind can and can't do in perfect isolation. It's about how those limitations relate to the structure of society. If we were all perfectly supported and perfectly accommodated no one would feel disabled, but that's not the world we live in.

I hope this gave you something to think about, and that you feel you have the space to choose to identify however feels right for you, because you're the only one who can make that call.

[rbvcdeluxe]

pinned post bc yeag

So, my name is Robert Bartolomeo but I have like, some nicknames ofc, I ain't tellin' 'em here rn. I go by he/him, I'm Mexican, transgender and I'm autistic with ADHD n OCD (send help). This is mainly a Starkid blog, some TCB and with the occasional mention of some other interests which are tbh quite some

I'd like to mention that if at some point I seem rude or mean, I promise it's not really likely (unless I state it myself or whatever). I just don't have the best wording or even vocabulary. I'm only a bitch irl but I'm more chill online I swear

If anyone wants to talk with me, feel absolutely free to do it. I would like to add that as normal as my typing seems when I post, I actually have terrible spelling n ton of typos when textin directly through DM or textin in general, even tho I still kinda try to be lowkey understandable but doing that kinda makes my typing slow so it is annoying but look im trying okaayyyyy.

Feel free to send asks about anything, either if it's jus for interaction or questions, I'm totally fine w it n I love talkin so yeah. Even if we are not mutuals, you can totally send asks. asks open at any time.

Anyone can ask for discord by DMing me btw

(more under the cut)

I'd call myself not so social (almost at all) but I do really, really appreciate when people wanna talk to me since socializing is a huge problem for me, so yup, everyone is welcome to interact with me.

Some of my interests are: Splatoon, The Good Place, Musical comedians (As in musical stand up and some comedy artists), some other musicals like Beetlejuice, Heathers, Jesus Christ Superstar and others. I'm also DEEPLY obsessed with Van Gogh, his paintings, his history and even other artists he was connected to like Paul Gauguin (who I fuckin' hate but I like learnin' 'bout him)

Going more deeply with my interest on musical comedians (since it's actually a pretty big term lmao), most of my interest goes to stand up musical comedians, those who are still on stage and off, like Bo Burnham, Tim Minchin, Tom Lehrer, Garfunkel and Oates, etc. But most of my interest goes to Bo Burnham and Tim Minchin, I can't physically be normal about them at all. I'm also in love with other works besides comedy some of them make or have been involved in, like movies and other projects. I LOVE Eighth Grade, Upright, Zach Stone Is Gonna Be Famous, and many others.

Also i think it would b silly to mention that my username are just the initials of my full name + deluxe. I just like the word deluxe so I put it there tbh (and it's also a reference to a song but shhhh you saw nothing)

Imma write some silly fun facts about me n shit now.

Back to Starkid: My two ever fuckin' favorite starkid musicals will always be Black Friday and TTO. I will defend those fuckers until the day I die ALONG with Cinderella's Castle. I cannot be normal about any of these shows. No one will ever fuckin understand BF as much as I do

I also love writing little simple analysis of some characters and even scenes I love, even if most of them I do not end up posting bc I either didn't like how I phrased it or I just think it could be way better (or maybe it's just too stupid). Something I find fun to overanalyze are the most unimportant shit to the lore in general, I like to think about the specifics of even one singular character, even if it doesn't change much about the lore of Hatchetfield as in general. I love every single little detail there is. (and by little I mean LITTLE. like, hey, did you know that during Feast Or Famine, Tom does the ‘Squee squee’ motion like this emoji🤌?? THAT KIND OF LITTLE DETAIL I MEAN.)

Yeah so like. As I mentioned this is a SK blog but I also like to fuckin complain a lot. about everything. Im a damn complaining bitch and there is absolutely nothing I can do about it. Either if it's fandom related or just every day shit, I will always fuckin complain.

More stupid shit. For some fucking reason (many (almost my whole life)) I fuckin relate to Barry fucking Swift (Barry is literally. like one of my few nicknames. It's insane) n. yeag. I'm not even surprised.

Oh and just thought I'll mention. I know im a fuckin asshole n a jerk I dont need fuckin reminders about it. thank yewwww C:

[gege-wondering-around]

So, today I was out celebrating the last day of school with two of my friends and one of them asked me about writing advices cause he knows I write fanfics and I thought to share with everyone who might need it the same things I told him today.

You don't have to stress over what you write, take your time and follow your flow of work, it'll all come to you.

Embrace what writing gives you. Which could mean: a new way of thinking about certain topics after you wrote them, the way you approach things you never thought about before (and how, after your 'first interaction' with the topic, you wanna interact with future topics)

Understand where you work better. Because it's not about forcing yourself to write, but finding the 'circumstances' (or settings if you prefer) in which you work better, for example for me is sitting on the stairs out my front door, or in the garden.

Do it for yourself. I understand you wanna post it online but you shouldn't think about setting a dead line for yourself, no one is running after you and you can take your time.

And if you don't wanna post it online. Even if no one or only a few people you choose will read your work, it'll still be amazing and proof of your commitment and effort. You don't have to post it to be a writer.

For as long as your work exists, you're doing amazing! Whether it's a WIP, a simple idea, a single line, it's amazing and the beginning of your journey as a writer.

Write what you want and like. It can be cliche or 'the usual thing' but it's still important and valid cause it's coming from you and you're special simply you are you, which means your work, even if it's a 'common plot' (which it never is cause your interpretation of it makes it special) will be unique because You wrote it.

Be proud of what you do. Never beat yourself up or compare yourself to other writers, you (as a beginner or not) have your own way of writing and your ideas are special and worth your efforts and time.

Don't start off thinking your work is overall bad. Don't block yourself over self criticism, if you can't choose a genre or trope it's fine, experiment with them all see which one you wanna explore more. But don't block yourself right at the start.

Understand it takes time. If you wanna go for a oneshot without many sub plots or you wanna simply write a scene you're in live with, you might not have this problem, but if you go for a complicate structured fic, for which you need infos (canon or fanon) it will take time to find what you need (or create the connections/infos you'll need).

Little plot maps can save you on the long run. If you plan to write something big, complicated and with many connections along the narration, a plot-map can help you. Ex. : you write a buller point of events, highlight the connection where you want them and so on.

You don't have to be the 'greatest of them all'. You can be you and write your story, you don't have to be worldwide know to be a legitimate write. You are a writer the second you picked up the pen/open the document and started thinking about it.

To be a writer you don't have to meet any standard. There are no standard (apart from guidelines of sites and simple common sense. Ex. Don't be racist). You can write any length, any genre, any trope, any shit, any setting, any AU, anything. Do as you want (and remember to be respectful).

Enjoy what you do. It might be your calling in life or just a little hobby of yours, either way, ENJOY EVERY STEP OF THE WAY. Don't fall in the mindset of 'I have to this - i have to that' DO WHAT YOU ENJOY.

When you feel like you're losing motivation, remember why you started in the first place. It common to lose motivation and it does make you less of a writer, it's human to fall out of something when it takes more than what you expected, but it's necessarily not a bad thing. Motivation is showed through your dedocation, your dedication through your effort, your effort through your work. It will take time to write it and you'll be proud of it every day you'll look at it, especially when you love what you write. I promise you, if you feel like your motivation is slipping away, see how much effort you put in your work and re-read it, you'll fall in love with it even more and your motivation will be back.

You don't have to write every day. You can take pauses, big or small, through your work. A hour, a day, a week, a month, a year.

Write when you feel like writing. Some days you'll be exhausted and drained of all energy and it's okay, maybe that day you won't write and it's completely fine. Your writing time is for yourself, it's not a daily tast you have to accomplish to feel fullfilled. Your writing time is something you do spontaneously and willingly, don't force yourself to write when you feel like nothing can come out of your creativity/mind/pen.

If nothing comes to you about what to write next in your plot/work/chapter, take a break and change your 'settings'. If you write at your desk, on your pc (or any other electronics), take a sheet of paper and a pen, go outside or somewhere you like (my advice is outside, around nature) and sit down. Things and ideas will come at you, the pen and paper will help you get in touch with your ideas without any pressure.

Docs on 'forever pages'. I don't know exactly how it's called in English, but on google docs you can put this long infinite scroll of one screen-big page which can help you reduce anxiety and the feeling of being pressured to fill the entire page with words. (I highly suggest this if you can, it helps a lot. Also, change the paper color to any color you like, i personally use a light gray) (if you don't have this option: you don't have to fill the whole page to end a chapter/work. You can end it in a single line and leave the rest of the sheet blank, it's okay. Don't write something you feel as unnecessary.)

Haters exist. It sucks but it's true, there'll be someone that will hate on your work just to spead hate, but it doesn't mean your work is bad. Remember, for as long as you love your work, that's the only opinion that matters.

And please, remember these are just the suggestions/advices I gave to him and to myself when I first stared writing and I learned them as I wrote more and more. You don't have to follow any of this but if they managed to help you, I'm glad they did.

YOU ARE A WRITER, DESPITE EVERYTHING, YOU ARE.

You're an amazing, talented writer and no one can take that away from you and if you are a beginner or you want to try to write, please do. Take your time, enjoy the ride and live the life. You'll be amazing at what you do.

Also, I'm proud of you. whether you wrote 10, 100, 1000 or 10.000 words today or in the last week, or month.

I AM PROUD OF YOU.

AND SO YOU SHOULD BE TOO.

you are doing amazing just because you started, you're gonna be fantastic cause you are meant to do great things, and everything you love will show you how much it loves you back.

BE PROUD. BE YOU. BE THE WRITER YOU WANT TO BE.

[russellsppttemplates]

since charles gf is friends with the boys since theyre young, how about a little something about her helping pierres gf when the woman feeling overwhelmed with their fame? like i imagine it can get crazy with paparazzi, all the money and the access, the travelling,the girls throwing themselves over them...nothing like us 9-5'vers are used to.

"We can go through here, it's usually calmer", you nudged Pierre's girlfriend while she walked along side you into the paddock, looking around at everything, "I don't usually see this way on TV", she mumbled, "photographers always stay on the other entrance, more famous people and all", you explained, thinking about the cuts you needed to take, "Fabiana from AlphaTauri taught me these paths for every race I went to when I first started dating Charles", you smiled at the memory, remembering how young (and lost) you were.

"Was it different because you were their friend before?", she asked you, "I didn't notice it at first, to be honest. But as we got older, everyone started guessing and wondering who I was, mean comments thrown as to why I was either at every race, because I surely had to have a job and why was I always in the paddock, or the other way around, why I wasn't here supporting them", you mused, "and I started taking these 'less famous' paths to the paddock", you explained, "it's not that the other ones aren't safe, but these are easier", you smiled as you reached the back entrance of Alpine, "Here".

.

"Hi, Y/N? How are you?", Pierre's girlfriend said over the phone while you cooked dinner with Charles' help, "Hello, dear, I've been good, and you? Pierre told me you'd join the race this weekend!", you replied, sensing some nerves on her tone but wanting to check if it was just your odd impression, "are you alone? I actually wanted to talk to you for a bit, if that's okay", she forwarded, making you ask her for a second.

Pausing the call, you looked at Charles, "can you handle the rest of the recipe, please?", you wondered, "just put these in halfway and then straight to the oven, right?", he pointed, making you peck his cheek before saying, "exactly. Merci, amour! Call me if you need anything", before leaving for your bedroom, wanting the call to be more private. "I'm back, sorry, just had to check Charles was capable of making the rest of our dinner", you giggled, "is everything okay?", you asked, "it, it seems so silly, but I don't know what to do, and it is consuming my kind day by day, and I don't want Pierre to be worried about this, he already has a lot on his plate and-", you decided to interrupt her, "hey, deep breaths, okay? Nothing is silly if it is bothering you. You can tell me if you want", you invited her to continue, "there has been a lot of comments online. Apparently people found my social media, and some managed to get hold of my posts because there are pictures from my Instagram page on the Internet and I have a private account, and it has spiralled so much, it's insane. They're talking about me like they know me, saying things that they take for granted and that are not the truth, and I'm not used to it. I thought I could call you to vent it out I guess, I know we can't do much about it", she admitted sadly, "unfortunately, this is part of what they do. But it is not because it is a part of what they do that you should accept it. And it's okay if it bothers you, it's only logical after all", you tried, "I wish I could say it gets better but I can only say there are days. And it's quite shit because you'll have to learn who you can trust and sometimes you do it the hard way, but in the end you're the one who knows about you and Pierre, so you just focus on that", you advised, "and don't ever think it is silly to call or talk about this. Either to me, to Pierre or to Charles. Even if my boyfriend is a little oblivious sometimes, we all care about you and want you to be well.".

.

Charles and Pierre had agreed to have dinner the day they arrived at the track location, wanting to spend some relaxed time before the busy race weekend. You were about to sit down when Pierre and his girlfriend arrived, making you drop your bag before greeting her with a kiss and a hug, "how are you? Charles is just there hanging my coat, go and give him yours too if you'd like", you offered before moving to hug her boyfriend and your long time friend, "Thank you for what you did with her. And what you do. I couldn't have asked for a better support", Pierre said as soon as he faced you, "I know she has been having a bit of a bad time dealing with things, and I know I sometimes don't have the best advice because I don't live this all thing like you do, it's different for us, but I'm very happy that she has you, too", he said before hugging you.

(Thank you for submitting an ask 🤍)

[kimwexlers-brownhair]

please ignore this if you don’t want to get into in but could you hint at what the last post was about. worried i could be doing something harmful stupidly.

I've been seeing a lot of reblogs of people stirring shit with Jewish Tumblr, like in an exchange where someone was called a piece of shit for even living in Israel. These same people throw the word Zionist around without any thought. To me when I see that word online, I see the beginnings of an antisemitic conspiracy theory, because that is absolutely how it's used. I just want people -- and this is specifically to my fellow Westerners -- to think.

Netanyahu is a conservative demogogue along the same lines as Trump and Putin, and what's happening in Palestine is a crime against humanity. The genocide must end and the state of apartheid must end. Hamas is an antisemitic terrorist group, capable of spreading their own propaganda. The last time a terrorist group stirred up this much mass antisemitism by spreading lies and misinformation, World War II and the fucking holocaust happened.

All of these things are true, and it is a horrible, fragile situation in which, once again, civilians are the ones to suffer.

I am very close with a Jewish family. I know through stories what some of their family members went through down the generations, and I see the pain. I can't read shit like "Death to all Zionists" or "Being Israeli makes you a piece of shit" and just blithely go on with my day without thinking of what this all could lead to.

Think. Goddammit, think. My fellow Westerners, you will not help a single Palestinian by spreading antisemitic rhetoric. Always do your best to verify your news sources, no matter which "side" of this centuries old, complex history you're on. Israel's government has reason to lie, to exaggerate, and to spread false information. The Hamas has reason to lie, to exaggerate, and to spread false information. Think.

[brownbitchshit]

i never got super into stranger things so maybe i'm not the best person to talk, but i am someone who has unlearned zionism / who is on that unlearning journey. and looking at noah's posts makes me feel the same disgust i feel when i look at the propagandist shit my cousin is posting. it's like... we're not the ones at war. we're not the ones dying. it's reasonable to be scared at the uptick in antisemitism in the diaspora and the fact antisemitism is sadly pretty prevalent in online discourse, but that doesn't equal a threat to our lives. our faith teaches us to choose life.

anyway. thanks for making reasonable posts. seeing stuff like that, hearing messages of support from people who have jewish friends irl and probably know a thing or two about us, means a lot between the crazy zionist takes and the "all jews can go to hell" takes i've been seeing left and right lately.

Hey there! I can't tell you how happy it makes me whenever I see a Jewish person/ Israeli person supporting Palestine because I know how much effort it takes to unlearn everything you have been taught since birth by your country/community/family. I respect you and appreciate you. I hope you continue in this journey of truth and empathy and fight against the false narrative and propagandas. You are truly a good human being.

And I am the last person on earth who is anti-Semitic because I am a Muslim and I always feel like Muslim and Jewish upbringing has a lot of similarities. The way we are religious and raised a bit conservatively, it helps me to be friends with Jewish people easily as we relate to each other. So whenever I find an intelligent and non-zionist jewish person, I always get along with them extremely well.

Once again I appreciate your ask.I appreciate you. All the best for everything.