#Bro got a standing O in the middle of the SHOW and honestly??? EARNED!!!!

[badsalmonella]

Fergie don't be shy 👀 post the whole slime tutorial buddy 😊

[uncreativc]

*  ♡ ╰  wong yukhei. twenty three. cismale + he/him  ⁄   any time kendal zheng is in the test kitchen they play boogie by brockhampton. the leo sign has been working at that’s amore for two years as a sugar rusher. since then the ebullient has built a reputation for being goofy & bold but also childish & stubborn. could that be the the reason why their palate enjoys shrimp and pb & j sandwiches ? but it for sure explains why crude drawings on recipes, worn baseball hats, weird late night texts, being loudest person at a party remind me of them. ☇ mars. 18+. she/they. est.

yeah yeah go ahead and say it mars late mars never on time :rolls_eyes:. mars doesnt even know the concept of time so yeah thats who i am and yeah i orbit around nothing thats why my names mars. this is my Himbo kendal no relation to jenner but he might joke about being part of the kardashians. this took way longer than i wanted it too but thats okay watched a video the other day that was doing pokemon races and shuckle won so :D below will be like a semblance of a bio

P I N T E R E S T   |  D O S S I E R 

google searches include: how many teeth do i have, are we running out of almonds, why do people eat corn off the cob, how much would a pyramid cost, am i in a pyramid scheme, if you die on an operating table and come back to life is your birthday changed?

SUUUUPER competitve if there is challenge videos coming out you know hes trying to get in on that. stuck a marble up his nose once to prove he could do it put an entire cupcake in his massive ass mouth no one would stop him. ATE A SPOONFUL OF WASABI FOR WHAT?!

kendal is a middle child and it defintiely shows, their dumbass chaotic nature was definitely born out of being neglected and forgotten about. living in a shadow wasnt the greatest for them and then not even getting the attention of being a baby for long by his moms did their best to be equal with them all but kendal felt ****it****. they play it off as just being goofy and playful most of the time but he can get up to some real trouble when he feels like it. mostly out of just making bad decisions

too much energy - talks too much and is bad for interrupting he generally doesnt really have anything of use to add to a conversation other than weird stories, strange questions, and weird conspiracy theories but hes fun and loud and loves to be the centre of attention. this can be annoying honesly hes friendly and loyal he’d never turn someone down till the day he dies its just... bro is a lot to deal with sometimes hes so much of a loud ass clown and go against clearly something you told him not to do like jump up on a table leave a complete mess in the kitchen squeeze toothpaste in the middle of the tube. you know shit like that.

definitely is scared easily like you could easily scare him in the kitchen hes scared of the most stupid things like dark mirrors, his hair blowing off his body and landing on a dead body and him becoming a suspect for a murder. 

he loooooves camping which is kinda funny for someone who gets scared about the most irrational things. does he think a bear is gonna come and rip his tent apart? yeah probably but he still likes it. defintiely went to boy scouts growing up earned a lot of badges learned how to tie knots you know the usual. only had his moms cheat and make him patches like... once or twice. 

probably forgot it was your birthday or that you invited him out to something. you know the nana you have that never remembers and just sends random gifts and they say happy birthday. yeah thats him.

a little oblivious he wont know if youve caught feelings for him and assumes everything is just playful until otherwise told thats what he gets for flirting too much without even realizing. it gets him into trouble because people think they have something and he’s just like :O i thought we were just bros. maybe if he wasnt so flirty and dumb this wouldnt be a problem but its not going to stop him any time soon. hes very casually flirty with everyone he meets honestly. hes just a goof and a lot of times that shit comes off as super flirting and if you think it is.... youre right!

hes definitely more of a house party kind of guy or get his and sit on the back porch and launch water ballooons at a friend down on the ground. yeah he probably got a concussion from that once because he didnt realize that whiplash is a thing like a true idiot and it definitely knocked him out cold.

has a peanut allergy jokes about either living by the sword that he does not have but swears that he does or die by his peanut allergy.

likes mood rings pokemon cards and worm on a string. yes hes made people worm on a string before as pretty much a friendship bracelet. imagine a dude at a party blasted out of his mind coming up to you and handing you a worm on a string and saying youre his friend and that you deserve this. 

hes a cowboy grew up in the south and definitely plays that up loves dirt biking rock climbing and pretty much everything that doesnt entirely involve working on his farm like he doesnt like horses but does like goats you know? 

asked for an extension through email on his wiiu because he lost his computer somewhere

organized mess. you know that chapstick you dropped like three weeks ago he left it there because he knows exactly where it is. like he could just keep things tidy but what would be the fun in that. doesnt follow recipes like ever just kind of tries to eyeball and remember how things were made

WANTED CONS 

tinder date/ set ups that either led to something or didnt

good friend who hacked their instagram one night and started responding to dms just funny doesnt have to been anything crude. they do it to each other some nights like just hang out

hookups. good or bad. one night stand or on going.

party friends he gave them a worm on a string or something got really fucked up and they tried to make like exactly mcdonlds nuggets the boot ones all night

they stole something from your muse ( bike, spatula, idk anything )  and they caught them LSMDLSMDLMDSLM

they stayed up one night and tried to fully solve a cold case even went to the library so late that they got kicked out. it was a long night full of energy drinks and crazy theories. they still do this sometimes now.

crushes they can be mutual or one sided i really dont mind. like i said before danny kind of gets crushes really easily and they kind of just dissapear out of nowhere as well but like we could work something out

exes good bad or indifferent i really dont mind

old childhod friends could be from summer camp or an old teammate when he used to play more sports, could be literally anything i am down i love past connects 

roommates PLEASE

made edibles that were too strong together ended fucking them over for days

they movie hoped or dine and dashed together like i really dont mind just something funny 

someone he makes videos with id love to brainstorm a really stupid like alt series with another sugar rusher or maybe not even a sugar rusher im down for anything 

rock climbing/paint ball/laser tag friends? video games like smash or something theyre super competitve together 

im good for plotting anything 

[derireo]

reserved | (5) | z.yixing

word count: 2803

genre: violence + humor + angst; mafia/triad au + badboy!lay

chapter summary: fast forward a year later. lei fan’s overseas and xu tai decides to give her a call while yixing’s in a meeting. for some reason, there are tears.

chapters: 4 / 5 / 6

Chapter Five: Apart

"You know, I've been overseas for quite a long time now. I would appreciate it if you could send your guards back, Xu Tai." Lei Fan's voice was exasperated over the phone as she took a quick glance behind to see the two men trailing behind her while at the same time trying to not look suspicious to other onlookers. It had been nearly two years since the woman left China to study overseas, and nearly two years since Xu Tai insisted that she take a few of his men with her to ensure her safety.

Foolishly, she had agreed.

"I'm coming back home in a matter of a few days, so can you please tell them to go back?" she was desperate to have some time to herself without scary looking men following her everywhere she went, but it seemed that Lei Fan was losing this battle.

"Xiao Lei, you know I can't do that! I would've told them to come back had you asked a few weeks earlier, but you never did!" Lei Fan could distinctly hear the pout in the man's voice and resisted the urge to roll her eyes, instead resorting to rubbing away the wrinkles that were forming on her forehead. "I did! You just refused to listen and hung up on me!" her whining plead fell on deaf ears as she manoeuvered her way through the busy sidewalk, the distant sound of thumping music clear to her on the other side of the phone call.

"Are you in a club right now, Big Bro?" she scrunched her nose up in annoyance.

"That's not the point right now, sweetheart." the man's scoff was audible as he closed his eyes to calm his emotions, his hand lifting up to pinch the bridge of his nose, "You know the  only reason why I have Mo Shan and Ma Chou there with you is to keep you safe and make sure you're on track with your training." his voice was soft over the phone as he spoke to Lei Fan, eyebrows furrowing together out of concern for his friend.

"Also, Zhang He and I -- we miss you. You're our friend you know? We took care of you until you recovered and decided to study overseas, and we knew you wouldn't update us on anything once you left. I was honestly so grateful you decided to agree to take Mo Shan and Ma Chou with you."

The sincerity in his voice almost broke Lei Fan, but she kept her ground. As the noise level of the crowded sidewalk rose, Lei Fan found a little cafe to slip in and bumbled towards a table in the corner. She pondered over what to respond with and motioned for Mo Shan and Ma Chou to sit at the table in front of her, to which the two bodyguards hurriedly obeyed. She rested her elbows on the table with a stressed sigh and stared at the two men in front of her with a blank stare.

"I know. I miss you guys, too." she murmured, her bottom lip jutting out into a pout. "It's just stifling at times -- and kinda weird."

Xu Tai huffed out a laugh at that and nodded in agreement, "I get that, and I know you're coming back in a couple days so please just keep those two around until you come home."

Another sigh from Lei Fan. Her head bobbed as she pressed her lips together to keep her from frowning, her eyes closed to keep them from tearing up. "Just to make sure no random gang just ups and kills me, right?" she smiled once a laugh escaped from her body and leaned back against her chair, her phone squished against her cheek by her hand as her eyelids fluttered open to let her eyes stare up at the ceiling.

"Well -- yeah. No Chinese Mafia or Triad is gonna get you all the way over there, but it's good to be safe with the gangs in your country. Politics are shit and the law won't do much for you no matter where you are in the world." Xu Tai nagged.

Lei Fan grumbled to herself once the man began to scold her and decided to tune out his voice until he stopped talking. She brushed her fingertips over the cafe menu that was laying on her table and took the time to think of her next response, the thumping of the music on the other side of the phone call still apparent. "I understand. Thank you, Big Bro." her smile was genuine as she flickered her eyes over the menu, her hair falling in front of her face. "Don't forget to pick me up at the airport once I get back, okay?"

"No promises, baby!" Xu Tai joked. Lei Fan could practically hear the jovial expression on his face and relaxed into her chair, her smile slight, but obviously happy. "I'm gonna hang up the phone now." she warned to which the man hummed in response, "Bye bye."

Setting her phone down, Lei Fan totally didn't expect for the phone call to leave her feeling positive, but it did, and she felt like celebrating for a bit. She invited Mo Shan and Ma Chou to sit at her table to decide on some drinks and desserts to snack on to let time pass by faster, and they did, although the bodyguards were a bit hesitant. Pleased with herself, Lei Fan took a picture of the drinks and desserts and forwarded it to Xu Tai's number.

Little Lei <3: [Image Forwarded]

Bro Tai: can't believe this is the first time you send me a text message and it's a picture of you and those two on a date :/ how dare you break my heart like that! preposterous !!

Little Lei <3: lmaoo don't even start with me big bro. i'll be sure to make up for lost time when i get back! just u, me and bro zhang! <3

A fond smile had made its way onto Xu Tai's face as he stared at the last message, his feet automatically walking him out his VIP room to shuffle to the one beside his. He didn't notice he was knocking on the door until his knuckles had made contact with it the third time. He cursed himself quietly and pocketed his phone, an awkward smile on his face as a guard opened the door to see who it was.

Xu Tai waved at the guard before taking a peek inside to see a group of men lounging on a two piece couch that connected at the corners and gave a tight lipped smile to Zhang He who was in the middle of a sentence before he was interrupted by the knocks on the door. His eyes were cold as he stared at Xu Tai, but motioned for him to come inside.

Breathing a sigh of relief, the man did as he was told and sat at one of the tables in the room where there was an empty chair.

The room reeked of burning cigarettes and spilled liquor, a stench that Xu Tai still couldn't get used to after all of these years. He patiently waited for the meeting to end as the clinking of glasses and the occasional giggle from one of the hostesses filled his ears while the voice of Zhang He droned on about this and that -- expansions for the city, club industry and whatever else contributed to the growth of Heaven on Earth.

"And everyone, please, and I mean please stop making stupid mistakes whenever you have your men pick up goods of whatever kind." Zhang He grunted, his shoulders tensing as he took a sip from his glass, eyes slanted as he glared at each and every man in the room. "The reason why you all keep getting your men captured by the cops is because you're not careful about it. The police will turn a blind eye to us as long as you don't do it out in plain sight." Zhang He shook his head with a frown, extinguishing his cigarette into the ash tray while leaning back against the comfort of the couch.

"Bunch o' idiots, all of you." he rolled his eyes as the men shifted uncomfortably, the women in their arms looking awkward as the room grew silent.

Xu Tai hid his smirk behind the hand that was helping prop his chin up on the table.

"I don't give you guys all this money and freedom just to fuck around, alright? So unless you want me to beat some sense into any of you, be my guest." he drawled, the fire behind his eyes scorching every person who made eye contact with him. "You've got to fuckin' earn what you want, boys. You know that." he scoffed as no one dared to say anything and set his glass down on the coffee table, leaning back against the couch once more while loudly clapping his hands.

"And that concludes our meeting for tonight." he sighed, watching as the people in the room breathed a sigh of relief and made their way towards the door, "Don't forget what I said everyone, and don't mess up the place." he said as his final goodbye and everyone murmured a 'yes', as if they were being scolded by their normally even tempered parent.

Zhang He dragged a hand through his hair while the other went to rub his face. His eyes blinked tiredly once it was just him and Xu Tai left in the room and he motioned for the latter to come and sit closer. As Xu Tai plopped down, he noticed that a toothpick had magically appeared in his friend's mouth and scoffed in amusement, "Really keeping them on their toes now, Bro."

"It's the only way to get things done around here," Zhang He murmured, his toothpick loosely dangling from his teeth, "What did you need?" he asked, standing up from the couch to go and check if there was still anyone waiting outside the door before coming back in to lock the VIP room. While Zhang He did this Xu Tai fished his phone out from his pocket in a hurry and quickly typed his password in to show the text conversation he had with Lei Fan.

An adoring croon left the man's mouth when he saw the image that was sent and flicked his toothpick  into the ash tray on the table, leaning back onto the couch with a sigh. He crossed his arms over his chest and pursed his lips, his legs crossed as he stared up at the ceiling. "I'm glad she's coming home soon."

Xu Tai bobbed his head in agreement.

He pocketed his phone. "How's it going with the city?" he asked.

Zhang He let out a deep sigh and covered his face with one hand, his body melting into the comfort of the couch as Xu Tai shuffled around to turn on the fan that was placed inside the room to air out the dampness that was permeating throughout the area. "Everything's going smoothly; I'm just hoping those fools pull through," he confessed, his eyes bleary when uncovering his face, "and I made it clear to those who weren't trustworthy enough to not lay a single finger on Lei Fan." another sigh.

"The situation with Li Xiahouji is the same as always. If she's caught doing something suspicious, anyone who sees will have to take her and bring her back to our place." Zhang He's chest rumbled as he spoke, and it made Xu Tai a little uneasy as it meant that the man wasn't in the greatest of moods.

"She hasn't been seen in a while though," Xu Tai added, thrumming his fingers against his thigh nervously, "We have eyes everywhere, but there's no sign of her in the places she normally frequents, the men she contacted that night are off the radar as well."

Zhang He shrugged and rolled up the sleeves to his black dress shirt to his elbows, the chain around his neck a dull shine compared to the sweat that was slowly appearing on his skin due to the heat in the room -- or maybe its just his blood heating up. He knew it was kind of odd that that woman suddenly disappeared from his men's sights as well as his, but she probably figured out that she was being followed at some point.

"I have no doubt that she'll appear again more frequently if she bumps into Lei Fan when she comes home," Zhang He confessed, scratching at the dragon tattoo that curled around his left arm with a look of disinterest on his face, "She'd probably freak out, but considering Xiahouji and the connections she has outside of the city, she'll make sure to get rid of Lei Fan again." he tsked.

Xu Tai hummed in acknowledgement and leaned back in the couch with his arms crossed behind his head to cushion it, staring at the ceiling in wonder before turning his head to look at his friend. "And Guo Dian?"

Zhang He's face scrunched into one of annoyance and sent an incredulous glance towards Xu Tai, shaking his head, "Who gives a fuck about him? If he pops up with that Houji girl then all the more reason to wipe out those two and whoever is backing her up." he spat, fingers splaying across his knee as his heart drummed erratically against his chest. "Seriously, that Guo Dian is a damn idiot. Can't believe Lei Fan dated that guy."

The other could only nod again and smile sadly, "He really left her for dead just to get with Xiahouji, huh? And for what, money? Love?"

Zhang He groaned in annoyance and rolled his eyes, tilting his head around to get his neck to crack to rid of the stiffness in his upper body. "Love, my ass. Who cares? I know that if he ever tries to make contact with Lei Fan if he discovers she's still alive, I'll make sure his 'gang' or whatever it is he has suffers." he snarled, loudly cracking his knuckles to make a point, the rings adorning his fingers glistening under the room lights that mesmerises even Xu Tai.

"Boss, chill. We can't just wipe them out all at once, it's not fun." the other man wrinkled his nose and lightly punched Zhang He's shoulder, his expression clearly showing how much he's enjoying the scene of his Big Bro losing his temper.

"Also, I'm getting kind of bored acting as the King, you know." he pouted, sending puppy eyes Zhang He's way to which the latter rolled his eyes to the back of his skull and swiftly brought his friend into a playful headlock, aggressively rubbing his fist against the top of his head, "I'm the one who goes through all the meetings and watches over everything," Zhang He spoke through gritted teeth, his mouth curving into a devilish grin as the other man wailed in protest against the abuse, "You're just the face, kid, don't think you're special."

"And I'm also the target." Xu Tai complained, not even bothering to struggle in the man's grasp. Zhang He scoffed and threw his subordinate across the couch, poking his tongue out, "I don't know why you're complaining when you're one of the most dangerous of people that walk this earth."

Xu Tai huffed, "I'm not worried, but it's rather annoying whenever someone goes and tries to blow my brains out without saying 'hello' first."

Zhang He waved his hand in dismissal and disregarded what his friend had said, opting to fill his glass with liquor again, "Well, at least you understand how I feel whenever I have to call for a meeting every night." he mumbled, lips stuck on the rim of his glass as he drank the alcohol he poured.

"Isn't it time we tell Lei Fan who we are anyways? It's been 3 years since we've known her." Xu Tai complained, "It's hard to keep these secrets from her when we all mutually trust each other this much."

Zhang He shrugged and took another sip from his glass, glancing at the time on his watch before giving a sparing glance to Xu Tai, "I'm sure we'll have to tell her soon. A shit show's going to happen once she steps foot into China." he murmured, tilting his head back and closing his eyes, his body slumping once more into the couch to get a slight nap in before they'd have to close the club.

"Make sure there are eyes in the city on the lookout for Li Xiahouji and Guo Dian on the day of Lei Fan's arrival."