luna0kcal

[notsocheezy]

Brain Curd #187

Brain Curds are lightly edited flash fiction - practically first drafts - posted daily (haven't missed one yet!) and sometimes written with the express intention of being terrible… but, you know, in an endearing way. Please like and reblog if you enjoy - the notes keep me going!

“So get this,” Lily said to Sarah, leaning back on her booth seat.

“What?”

“I’ve got this friend, right? Let’s call her… Salsa.”

“An odd name.”

“Well, it’s an alias. Anyway, she’s a serial monogamist - probably dated more guys than I’ve dated girls - but she refuses to have sex with any of them!”

“Salsa?”

“You wouldn’t have met. Now, the kicker is, her rotating cast of exes is starting to have something in common with each other - you know, other than dating her.”

Sarah rolled her eyes and started looking through the menu.

“And it’s very funny, because she is adamant, and I mean adamant, that she’s entirely, one-hundred-percent heterosexual, but her exes keep coming out as trans women! And dating each other! Isn’t that funny? Especially since she never told a single one of them that she was also trans!”

“Are you done, Lily, or should I order my lunch to go?”

“Now I’m going to tell you something that may shock you, Sarah. You’ll want to be sitting down for this.”

Sarah sarcastically patted the seat around her to check its build quality. “Yup, that’s a bench alright.”

Lily took Sarah’s hands and maintained uncomfortable eye contact. “Sarah…” She said in a serious yet comforting voice. “You’re gay. I was talking about you the whole time. I just thought you should know.”

Sarah pulled her hands out of Lily’s. “You don’t know what the heck you’re talking about!”

“Oh, don’t I?”

“No, you don’t. I’ve got a date lined up with a new guy tonight. I think he might be the one.”

“You know who else is ‘the one’? Neo. From The Matrix. Which is famously a lesbian trans allegory.”

“Oh, shut up.”

“But in all seriousness, I really doubt this guy is ‘the one’ if you don’t even know his name.”

“Know his name? Of course I know his name.”

“What is it?”

“Uh… well, look, I remember his middle name, okay? It’s Jacob.”

Lily smugly drank her mocha. “You don’t even know his first name.”

“He just goes by Jacob, okay? I only heard his first name once at the beginning of class before we met.”

“Tell me about him.”

“What’s there to tell? He’s a guy.”

“Exactly. People who are attracted to men, believe it or not, find them interesting as individuals, not as archetypes.”

“Why would you know, if you’re a lesbian?”

Lily shrugged. “This is what my research has told me.”

Sarah shook her head and got up from her seat. “Whatever, Sigma Freud. Why don’t you pick apart my subconscious on your own. I’m going to pick up a sandwich from Starbucks on the way to class instead.” She picked up her purse and strolled toward the exit.

Lily raised her cup. “When you see Jacob, tell her I said hi!”

Passable. is finally out of the closet! Episode One: The Virgin is out now on NotSoCheezy.com as the first Writer's Block - a collection of Brain Curds with the whey squeezed out. And with the pilot complete, we're ready to move on to Episode Two - and a teleplay format (it's a sitcom, after all). Stay tuned!