#Bitch I just wanted to read the magic tree house I finished the whole fucking book series but for some reason the last one was when

[trinrose3]

me when I remember I don’t actually hate reading just the teachers that I had and the strict rules they forced me to follow when it came to the type of books and “reading level” I was allowed to read when I was little cause god forbid they let my disabled/visually impaired ass read anything without “testing to see if I could handle it” or whatever while actively denying me the right to be tested throughout the whole TWO(!!) years I had her because my teacher hated my ass for some fucking reason which permanently put me off from viewing reading as enjoyable :)

[marauders-venting]

Our Last Summer (Part 1)

pairing: wolfstar (sirius x remus)

genre: fluff & angst

warnings: none

words: 2267

note: based on the song ‘Our Last Summer’ by ABBA

a/n: this isn’t the whole thing but I haven’t finished it yet and it’s getting really long anyway so I decided to just post it in parts (i know it says fluff & angst and there’s no angst here but be patient it will come)

I can still recall our last summer, I still see it all. Walks along the Seine laughing in the rain, our last summer, memories that remain… I can still recall our last summer, I still see it all. In the tourist jam round the Notre Dame our last summer walking hand in hand

Sirius woke up smiling. Remus’ arm was still draped over him. He turned around and kissed him on the nose.

“Hey,” he whispered. “Are you awake?”

“I am now,” Remus groans.

“Sorry.”

“No, don’t be,” Remus says, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. “I like waking up next to you.” Sirius’ smile widened.

“I like waking up next to you too,” he said. He kisses Remus softly before turning to grab his wand off his bedside table and Summoning two cups of tea. He hands one to Remus and then opens the drawer of his bedside table and pulls out a large packet of dark chocolate.

“Happy anniversary,” Sirius says, giving Remus the chocolate.

“Best present ever,” Remus says, taking a bite; Sirius can’t tell if he’s being sarcastic or not.

“The day is just beginning,” he says, sipping his tea.

“Really? So what do you have planned?”

“You’ll just have to wait and see,” Sirius says mysteriously.

---------

“No way,” Remus said, shaking his head. “There is no fucking way I’m getting on that death trap.”

“Yes you are,” Sirius said, taking his hand and pulling him closer to the motorcycle. “Come on, it’ll be fun.”

“No,” Remus said. “Why can’t we just Apparate? Or take a taxi?”

“What’s a taxi?” Sirius asked.

“I swear to god, I’ve already told you at least five times,” Remus says, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Well, it doesn’t matter because we’re riding my motorcycle,” Sirius said.

“Nope,” Remus said. “Not fucking happening.”

“Please,” Sirius pouted. “It’s not illegal, I have a license. And I promise I won’t fly. I’ll stay on the ground the whole time.” Remus still looked hesitant. “I even customised your helmet myself.” He pulled out a black helmet with ‘Moony’ written on the side in flaming block letters. It brought a little smile to Remus’ face.

“Ugh fine,” Remus said, rolling his eyes. “But this is a one-time thing.”

“Yeah, yeah, if you say so,” Sirius said. “Now come.” They climbed on the motorcycle and Remus wrapped his hands around Sirius’ waist. “Normally I would say hold on tight,” Sirius said, “but if you hold any tighter you might just squeeze me to death.”

“And if I don’t hold this tight I might just fall to my death,” Remus replied. “Now shut up and drive; I want to get this over with.”

And suddenly, they’re on the road and holy fuck Remus is terrified. He’s resting his head on Sirius’ shoulder watching the cars around them. He squints his eyes, trying to make everything appear blurry (hoping it’ll make this a little less terrifying) and yes, he’s afraid but he has to admit that the blur of lights from all the cars is actually quite beautiful. That is, until they climb on the highway and Sirius picks up the speed. Now it’s just terrifying. Remus closes his eyes and buries his head in the crook of Sirius’ neck. The smell of Sirius and the feel of his beating pulse calms Remus down a little. He knows Sirius wouldn’t suggest this if it was that dangerous; Sirius would never let anything bad happen to him.

Remus doesn’t open his eyes until he feels them slowing to a stop. When he does finally look around, he finds himself in the parking lot of what looks like a small park.

“Hey,” Sirius says, reaching a hand back and stroking Remus’ thigh. “Are you ok?”

“I’m alive, if that’s what you mean,” Remus says, letting go of Sirius so he can climb off the motorcycle. Sirius helps Remus down and takes his helmet.

“Come on, it wasn’t that bad, was it?”

“Yes, it was that fucking bad,” Remus says. “I’m never riding that thing again.”

“Hey, ‘that thing’ has a name, you know,” Sirius said, arms crossed.

“Right, sorry,” Remus said, rolling his eyes. “I’m never riding Elvendork again.”

“Wow, I can’t believe you actually remembered their name,” Sirius said, laughing.

“I can’t believe you actually named your motorcycle,” Remus said. “Now tell me what we’re doing here.”

“Come with me,” Sirius said, pulling him by the hand into the park.

“Where are we?” Remus asks, looking around.

“You’ll see,” Sirius said. He led Remus to the far end of the park where several bushes and trees made a hedge that seemed to show the end of the park. Sirius got on his hands and knees and pushed the plants out of his way as he crawled into the hedge.

“Are you serious right now?” Remus asked. As soon as the word was out of his mouth he regretted it.

“I’m always Sirius,” came the reply. “Now come on.” Remus sighed and crawled through the hedge. When he came out on the other side he saw Sirius sitting on the grass.

“What is this place?” Remus asked, looking around. If he was being honest, it looked like a little heaven. Everything was so green. The grass, the trees, the hedge they came through. It looked like something out of a painting. The colourful flowers from the trees littered the floor; Remus picked one up, walked over to Sirius and put it in his hair.

“I used to come here when I was a kid,” Sirius said, effectively surprising Remus. “I know hardly any of my stories start like that but when I was… 9, I think, my cousin Andromeda was 15. And one summer she came over to our house and she asked my parents if she could take me somewhere. I don’t know what lie she told them but whatever it was they bought it. She brought me here. She told me that a friend of hers at school had shown her this place. His dad was a park ranger and he used to come here all the time as a kid. It was just close enough to my house that we could walk here and we’d spend all day playing here. She even learnt how to use muggle money so she could buy us food.”

“The last time we did it was the year before I started Hogwarts. She was seventeen then. She showed me magic. It was incredible. She did all kinds of spells to make plants grow and stuff. It was awesome. I’d never seen magic so… raw before. It was beautiful. But then she ran away with Ted Tonks and got burnt off the tapestry so there was no way my parents would let me see her. But she wrote to me a few times to tell me to meet her here. That was how I met Ted for the first time. Turns out he was actually the one who showed Andie this place. And I met Nymphadora here as well. I used to come here alone sometimes too. I tried to bring Regulus with me once but he was scared we’d get caught. The only good memories from my childhood��� they’re all from this place. I just wanted to show it to you. I mean, you took me to your childhood home but… I mean you’ve seen the Potters’ house a million times. But I guess I wasn’t really a child by the time I moved there. So I guess… I don’t know, I just wanted to share this with you.”

“Thank you,” Remus said, taking Sirius’ hand and pressing his lips to the back of his hand, “for bringing me here, I mean. This place is beautiful. Are you the only one who knows about it?”

“Oh, I doubt it,” Sirius said. “I mean, it’s not very visible but there’s no way that nobody else has ever found this place. But it was always empty whenever I came here. Which wasn’t that often I suppose.” Sirius flopped back onto the grass, dragging Remus with him. They lay on their backs looking at the sky, hands still clasped together.

“It looks like it’s going to rain,” Remus said. Sirius shrugged. It was true; the clouds had been dark all day and the smell of approaching downpour lingered in the air. But Sirius had been keeping his fingers crossed that the rain would wait until later tonight so that he could carry out his plans without any disruption.

“You hungry? We could go get some food if you want. There are muggle shops nearby. But you’ll have to handle the money cause I still have no clue how to do that.”

“Oh for fuck’s sake, if Andromeda could learn I’m sure you can too,” Remus said, as they left their little garden of Eden. “Come on, I’ll teach you.” They walked down the street looking for a coffee shop or a food vendor nearby. They found a bakery selling sandwiches so they bought two, Remus bought tea, Sirius bought coffee, and they returned to the hidden corner of the park.

“Do you get how to use the money now?” Remus asked as they walked back.

“You’ve taught me a million times, Moony, it never sticks,” Sirius said. “You just have to resign yourself to the fact that your boyfriend is a dumb bitch, no matter how hot he is.”

“Oh don’t worry, I accepted your lack of intelligence and general common sense a long time ago, Pads,” Remus said, putting an arm around Sirius as they sat back down on the grass, pulling the sandwiches out of the paper bag and laying everything out on the floor in front of them.

“No, no, you’ve got it wrong,” Sirius said, shaking his head. “I am intelligent but I’m still a dumb bitch too.”

“You’re saying you’re an oxymoron?”

“Wait, I never say I was a moron—”

“No, not a moron, an oxymoron.”

“What does that mean?” Sirius asked.

“It’s like something that juxtaposes itself,” Remus said.

“Juxta-what now?” Sirius said. Remus rolled his eyes.

“You need to read more. It’s something that contradicts itself. Phrases like awfully nice or saying that someone was found missing.”

“Oh,” Sirius said. “So yeah, that’s what I’m saying. You’re so smart, Moony. You know so many big words.”

“Literally just pick up a book,” Remus said, laughing and kissing him softly. “I promise, it’ll do you wonders.”

“Why do I doubt that?”

“Because you’re an idiot.”

“Oh we’ve circled back to that now, have we?”

---------

That was how they spent most of the day. Talking, laughing, joking, kissing, lying on the grass. It seemed like the day really was going to be perfect. Until it started raining. At first, the drops were light and they weren’t bothered by it, but soon the rain became heavy and loud and they were both getting soaked. Remus didn’t mind getting wet; he had bigger worries on his mind.

“We’re not riding a motorcycle in the rain, are we?” Remus asked, his concern leaking through his voice.

“We can wait for the rain to stop if you like,” Sirius said. “Hey, you know, it’s actually good that we came here on Elvendork because we can cut through the traffic on our way home.”

“What? No, no, no, no, no,” Remus said, shaking his head. “There’s no way that’s safe.”

“It’s perfectly safe, Moony, I’ve done it a million times,” Sirius insisted. “Just keep your eyes closed like you did before. It was cuter like that anyway.” Remus felt himself blush.

“I’m sorry,” Sirius said out of the blue. “I didn’t know it would rain.” He looked genuinely upset; Remus wasn’t sure why.

“Of course you didn’t know, Pads,” Remus laughed. “You can’t control the weather. Everything will be fine. We’ll just wait out the rain before riding home.”

“That’s not what I—” Sirius started, “never mind.”

“What is it?” Remus asked, covering Sirius’ hand with his own.

“I just… I wanted everything to be perfect today. I’m sorry I ruined our anniversary.”

“Ruin it? Sirius, what are you talking about? You didn’t ruin anything.”

“But… it’s raining,” Sirius said confused.

“Yes and? Rain is, like, the most romantic thing ever.”

“It is?”

“Once again,” Remus sighed, “I would like to reiterate how desperately you need to read a book.”

“Well, I’m sorry we can’t all be addicted to romance novels.”

“Oh shut up and kiss me.” Sirius laughs and lets his lips meet Remus’. They’re both drenched to the bone but neither one of them could care any less. Sirius’ hand brushes Remus’ cheek as he wraps his arms around Remus’ neck pulling him closer. Remus’ hands are on Sirius’ waist, and they slide down to his hips. Sirius’ shirt had ridden up a bit from lifting his hands to reach Remus’ neck and Remus’ fingertips brush Sirius’ bare skin — which is wet and slippery from the rain — making Sirius shiver and sigh. When they break apart, Sirius brings his lips to Remus’ ear.

“Besides,” he whispers, as Remus runs a hand through Sirius’ wet hair, “who needs romance novels when I’ve got the best romance story in the world.” Remus felt a flutter of pure happiness and smiled. He kissed Sirius’ jaw, right beneath his ear.

“Happy anniversary,” he whispered. Sirius sighed in response. They stand there in the rain, wrapped in each other’s arms, dancing slowly to the sound of the rain splashing and pattering on the leaves of the trees around them.

[imgonnapanic]

Third gym squad with a theater kid s/o:

Kuroo Tetsurou

Tbh, he knew what he was signing up for when he started dating you.

He’s just not used to it, because he doesn’t have many extroverted friends who aren’t annoying pieces of-

I can envision you both going on the hub to watch pirated musicals. Hamilton, Heathers, Dear Evan Hansen, you name it.

He loooves your singing voice, even if it’s your nervous purposely bad one.

You love the musicals that include allll the good stuff (trauma, death, tragedy, etc.)

Or the iconic ones. You can’t forget about those.

So you’re less-than-thrilled when your school chooses “Honk! The Musical” for this years play.

It’s a spin off of the ugly duckling that no one has heard of.

And when you come up to Kuroo sulking about this boring play you’re emotionally obliged to do, he can’t help but laugh a little.

But his laughter stops when he sees your eyes down at your shoes.

And then he shuts the fuck up because you’re actually upset.

After assuring that you will still be Broadway material even if you’re dressed up as a goose, you feel a little better.

In the two weeks leading up to auditions, Kuroo is starting to get caught humming “A Poultry Tale” at practice.

I mean, his Spotify feed went from Kendrick Lamar to Legally Blonde within one month of dating you, so cut the guy a break.

The day of auditions, you’re a bundle of nerves as you go over the dumb song again and again.

And Kuroo is like “calm down babe you’re gonna do great.”

That sure did a ton.

“Shut up Heather”

...

“Sorry Heather”

He’s also a bundle of nerves at practice, though. He just couldn’t let you see it.

By now, all of the Nekoma team knows you’re auditioning today, and the minute he walks in he just holds up a hand.

“They’re auditioning as we speak”

He’s not surprised when you get the lead.

He looks like the cat who ate the canary he’s a little amused when he figures out the lead is named “Ugly” but by now he has learned to keep it on the inside.

Your schedule is now jam packed, but that’s okay, because Nationals are also coming up for Kuroo and needs to put in some extra hours at the gym anyways.

You better believe two months later Kuroo is making his entire team buy a ticket.

Kuroo didn’t even get to see you on opening night because of dress rehearsals, but that’s okay.

He cleared his entire schedule that day and now has time to wallow in his own excitement and buy you some flowers.

He’s there with the squad team at 6PM sharp, dressed up, and trying to keep his dignity.

When you first walk on stage, the team snickers a little bit at your costume, but Kuroo was completely enraptured by your singing voice, your blocking, your makeup, everything.

This was much better than the demo CD that they had given you.

Afterwards, he gives you your flowers and is glued to your side for the rest of the night, babbling about how proud he was of you, and how talented you are, Nekoma team be damned.

Tsukishima Kei

Tsukki-poo already had a soft spot for the arts before he met you.

Not that he would tell anyone, ever.

When you started dating him though, it gave him an excuse to share his favorite soundtracks.

“you can hit that note, you know.”

*cue the arguing about how you aren’t Barbara Streisand*

When you two are walking through the hallway with him and you see the poster reading “Auditions for Karasuno High School’s ‘The Little Mermaid’ are open!” You start freaking out.

You love that movie! And Kei tolerates it!

Kei honestly thought you would be Ariel/Prince Eric when he first heard you singing “Part of Your World”

Like, you have the voice of a fucking lark. The directors have to be batshit crazy not to cast you.

In his humble opinion.

So he’s a bit taken aback when you get the role of Flounder, but he’s very proud anyways. Especially after you explain that there’s musical numbers that you’re in that aren’t in the movie.

He just hates your director for no reason now.

Practicing your lines with him in your free time becomes almost inevitable because you both have nothing else better to do.

And he can see how into it you are.

And let me just say that you are killing it.

Seriously. You have no problem getting into character, and Kei doesn’t say this much but-

It’s fucking adorable, okay? He has little goth moths in his stomach.

And he can’t wait to see the show, because then he can show you off.

That doesn’t mean he likes the other first years prying at your progress.

Hinata’s incessant questioning about theater anatomy and the memorization of your lines gets really annoying.

Even for someone with a normal temper like you-

“Yes it’s called the right wing. NOT wing spiker. Yes they’re off book. Now will you shut your trap already?”

Dress Rehearsals come, and you’re spinning around his room, face morphing from complete concentration to happy, go-lucky Flounder.

You, Kei, and Yamaguchi (your little third wheel-) all know the soundtrack pretty much up and down, left and right, backwards and inside out.

He still shivers remembering the time you just walked into his house not registering that Flounder’s makeup looks kind of scary up close-

All of his pride was sacrificed that day. All of it.

On the morning of opening night, Kei was walking you to the school, pretending to be bitchy about it being on a Saturday.

“C’mon, what am I supposed to do all day?”

As luck would have it, he’s stuck sitting next to one Hinata Shoyo. Lovely.

So he sat down next to him, and ignored him the whole show. I mean, it worked, he shut up after thirty seconds.

After the show, Kei has to wait a bit for you to take your makeup off, but when you come running out, he can’t hold back a tiny grin.

“That was good. I’m proud of you.”

And then he took you to dinner because singing makes a bad bleep hungry 😌

Bokuto Kotarou

Listen, you’re loud, Bokuto’s loud-

So basically you two are on a mission to not annoy Akaashi for as long as you can before inevitably getting yelled at for your affection and love and shit.

Now, both of you would love for this to be possible.

But the Frozen soundtrack makes it too difficult.

Especially when you can edit the lyrics just to piss off Konoha.

“Turn away and slAm the door *on Konoha”

“The wind is howling like the storm inside *of Konoha”

The possibilities are endless, really.

The game changer is when you two are belting out the song where Elsa and Anna are arguing.

And you accidentally hit the “I-i-I CANNNNT”

Akaashi is like for the love of GOD just audition for the play.

He quickly realizes that his suggestion was not a good idea.

Since guess what the musical is.

You’re auditioning as a joke, okay? You love Frozen, but this is a Fukurōdani Academy level play.

You didn’t expect to land the role of Olaf.

Your director sat you down and bluntly told you that he thought that you had the charisma and energy to be Olaf, but he knew that you were auditioning for a joke.

He needed you to be committed.

And hell yeah, you were gonna be committed.

At first, Bokuto was super proud of you! His s/o as a lead role? So impressive!

You even taught Bokuto your choreography for “In Summer”

He only retained half of it, but eh.

He’s a volleyball player. He tried.

As rehearsal times became longer and longer, Bokuto was a little upset at himself because he didn’t realize how committed you were until it hit him in the face.

Akaashi is there to get him out of his funk when you aren’t, though.

“They feel the same way when you need to be in the gym longer. It’s just a part of having a passion. Just utilize your time with them wisely.”

This bitch knows full well Bokuto doesn’t do ‘wise’ though, so he also sets to him a little more.

Dress rehearsals start, and Bokuto is always waiting for you to come out of the auditorium to ride the bus home.

You’re just bubbling over with stories about the magic of being on stage.

The lights, the microphones, the costumes, just talking about it makes you nostalgic already.

On opening night, Bokuto and Akaashi are there in the front row, going through the program.

“There’s y/n!!!!”

And you can’t see him because of the blinding spotlight, but you can hear Bokuto cheering for you after you finish “In Summer”

Afterwards he gives you a big hug, and you guys go home and watch Frozen.

Akaashi Keiji

When you start dating Akaashi in your second year at Fukurōdani, you’ve been on stage for the last ten years of your life.

Singing, acting, dancing, you love it all.

You’re even considering making it your career.

Akaashi doesn’t know much about theater at all, but he makes sure to do his research since it’s such a big part of your life.

The company you take acting classes with is having their winter show soon, and you couldn’t be happier when you figure out it’s ‘Into the Woods.’

Akaashi makes the mistake of asking the plot of the story.

“So basically there are these two infertile bakers with dead parents and there’s this witch that’s old and wrinkly and she comes to their house because fifty years ago the bakers dad stole her veggies and took the magic beans that made her look old and wrinkly-“

(A/n: this isn’t even half the plot)

He decides he’ll figure it out when he sees the play.

Akaashi knows that it’s a difficult one, though.

Sondheim doesn’t fuck around.

So you shouldn’t be beating yourself up about cracking on some of the high notes and screaming into your pillow.

He feels like an idiot every time you ask him to give you constructive criticism.

He doesn’t know what to say. “That was good” is obviously not what you want to hear.

When the date of your audition rolls around, he has early morning practice.

So he sends you a text saying how far you’ve come already and he’ll be proud even if you end up being a tree and break a leg (he’s very proud of that part. Theater lingo with Akaashi 101)

He’s very pleased to hear through your extremely fast and animated chattering that you killed it.

You were going to be Jack from “Jack and the Beanstalk.”

He’s still not sure how that correlates with infertile bakers, but he’ll go with it.

You also have a notoriously hard solo, “Giants in the sky.”

Akaashi is very impressed.

All you two do is practice that song, until Akaashi is half sure he could sing the song if he really gave an effort.

(He tries seriously one time. He can’t sing. To save his life. Sorry Keiji and RIP y/n’s ears.)

“Maybe you’re just not a soprano?”

“I’ll leave the limelight to you.”

Rehearsals always leave you drained. There are so many dance numbers in the play that you have to go over.

And songs, oh god, the songs are pieces of work.

But you wouldn’t trade it for the world, so Keiji stays close, and is endlessly supportive.

You sent him a picture of your Jack costume, and Keiji is like that is kind of adorable ngl-

He walks into the auditorium you’re performing in, and even he’s nervous to be in there. It’s huge.

But when you walk on the stage, and start belting, all the breath leaves his lungs.

Oh. Ohhhhhhh. He understands the plot now.

[prettyboy-parker]

favorite fics of 2020 (and a goodbye)

hi all!

first, i wanted to say this is inspired by one of my closest friends my bitch @honeybunstarker . thank u for that 

secondly, i wanted to say a final goodbye. i know that i nearly left a few months ago, but i was still on the fence about writing for marvel then. now, ive lost all interest. thank you all for fueling my love for writing, and making these past two (??? i actually don’t know) years full of excitement and encouragement! from the ups (the blocklist, secret santa) to the downs (my favorite blogs and friends deactivating without a word), ive had the greatest time in this fandom. 

in case you were worried, i am NOT deactivating. my fics will be available for you to read whenever you want.

but, i will not be writing for marvel anymore, nor will i be posting on this blog.

now that the sad part is done, i didn't want to leave you guys without anything to entertain yourselves with. so, here are my favorite fics, including some non-marvel, from this year! 

(all descriptions are from the work itself)

my top fic from this year, which is also one of my favorite fics of all time, is a dog named sunshine.

“Bucky Barnes has issues. Mental health issues, and a whole lot of them, to be precise. Bucky is fucked up, and he knows that. His apartment looks like a dumping ground on most days, he can’t sleep through the night, sometimes he doesn’t shower for six days and doesn’t leave the house except to see his therapist once a week. Mostly, Bucky has no idea how the whole “talking about your problems” thing is supposed to help him, but sometimes his therapist has some really great ideas. Like getting a dog. Which is how Bucky meets Steve. Steve has blond hair and shoulders as broad as Bucky’s future if he wouldn’t suffer from depression and multiple mental disorders, and a waist as small as Bucky’s self-esteem. Steve also has a yellowish dog with floppy ears called Sunshine. And sunshine makes its way into Bucky’s life with a bounce in its step.”

a modern stucky fic which portrays depression in the best way i have seen in a fic so far. unfortunately, it has been orphaned before being finished :(

starker:

hey baby, slip between my beta-pleats and get to know my alpha-helix? By @starkerforlife6969​ and @darker-soft-starker​

“Even though Tony can't tell the difference between Manolo Blahnik and Jimmy Choo, Peter really has no other choice.

His heat is around the corner, so even though he loathes the party-going, booze drinking, smug playboy know-it-all that is Tony Stark-

He'll just have to do.”

if you asked me what my favorite starker fic of all time is, i’d tell you it’s this one

raising hybrid puppies by jaypendragon

“A non-powered Tony/Peter coffee shop AU with billionaire Tony and working-class, teenage Peter. Also, Toomes has a bakery and somehow Last Week Tonight is a genuine plot point.”

underage, slowburn, happy ending 

even though it’s one of the most notorious fics for the ship, i never read it until the summer. 

waiting for marriage by tuesday 

“In which Tony gets married and kidnapped in that order.

—

Tony Stark went to Vegas to cause a scandal.”

just super fun!

push you out (pull you back in) by @lovelystarker​

“So basically, Peter's kind of fucked. And not in the way that he wants to be-preferably by his mother's hot new boyfriend who has beautiful brown eyes and a disposition that's more than put-together. It wouldn't be so hard to ignore the crush, really it wouldn't, but Mr. Stark has practically moved in, so Peter can't avoid him if he wants to, and unlike his mom's past boyfriends, this one actually likes to spend time with him. So yeah, Peter's kind of fucked.”

just,,, wow. important to note that it is unfinished.

stucky:

you go to my head by alby_mangroves and brideofquiet

“Why would you do that for a man you don’t know?” Bucky asks.

Steve raises one slow eyebrow at him, then the other, till his expression turns from skepticism to disbelief. His forefinger and thumb reach into his shirt’s front pocket and draw out a wrinkled dollar bill.

Steve looks him in the eye when he says, very patiently, “For money, Bucky.”

40′s stucky is my favorite stucky

that boy is a problem by 2best friends

“In which a twinky little goth punk named Bucky puts a leash around Steve's dick and he's really into it.

(The leash is a metaphor. For now.)”

just porn

all the angels and the saints by speranza 

“In which Steve Rogers loses God and finds God and loses God, and also: Bucky.”

if it makes you cry, it’s probably good!

sugar sweet by colorcoated 

“College Student Bucky finds himself immediately attracted to Steve. He knows that Steve's a bit older than him, and that Steve himself is put off by the age difference. . . But that doesn't stop Bucky from wanting to climb him like a tree.”

the only slowburn i have tolerated 

my bucky by cleo4u2 and xantissa 

“Bucky finds a feral Alpha in the woods. Rather, the Alpha finds him. Bucky is sure it’s the end of his life as an independant Omega. It turns out to be the beginning of the strangest romance Bucky’s ever known.”

stony:

(i want you to see) the darkest side of me by ann2who

“In Monte Carlo, Steve meets the wealthy widower Anthony Stark. It’s love at first sight—at least for Steve—and he can’t believe his luck when Tony asks him to live at Stark Mansion, his large estate in Malibu. Never in his life had Steve thought something like this was possible… never had he been this happy. However, soon Steve realizes that Tony is still deeply troubled by the death of his first wife and haunted by the many ghosts she left behind. The longer Steve lives in her shadow, the more he understands that… He can never be what Tony’s wife had once been for him. And Tony might never truly love him.”

total mindfuck.

ironstrange:

let it be by lucifersfavoritechild

“While dealing with his son's car accident and a rapidly-dissolving marriage, Tony is drawn to Peter's surgeon, Dr. Stephen Strange.”

where severus snape is hot, not a stalker, and somehow gets the girl by utopiste

“Or: Peter Parker is sick and wants to cut his Neuroscience class. Tony just wants to help (and maybe date his son's hot teacher). Stephen Strange just wants to give his lecture in peace.”

miscellaneous:

geraskier: who needs plans anyways by NTK

“All witchers are alphas or betas by nature, since no omega has ever survived the Trial of the Grasses. Gerald has never had any problems with satisfying his needs on the occasional rut, for the whores from Poviss to Nilfgard were eager to be of service to a sturdy hunk like him. On the other hand, a certain omega/ bard/ occasional witcher tagalong has always made certain to acquire enough suppressants from local healers before setting out on a new adventure. That is, until the travels with his favourite White Wolf led the unlike pair into uncharted territory for longer than expected… life ensues”

philtriss: bound by sapphiresmoke

“Leashing involves a pupil being bound to their master in body, mind, and magic,” Philippa explained, folding her hands on the desk in front of her. “It is not something to undertake lightly, but if you accept, I will be able to share my magic with you, and instruct you in ways that would be otherwise be impossible if I were to only rely on verbal communication. It is intimate, it is at times invasive, but if you consent to this, Triss, it will make you vastlymore powerful, and from the look in your eyes, that seems to be exactly what you are looking for.”

vandermatthews: one more night like this would put me six feet under by jukeboxgraduate

“To be alongside the same person week after week, to share honesty and trust with someone day after day, is a rare treasure in a life that hinges on dishonesty. Hosea holds it close to his heart.”

din/cobb: every wave is a tidal if you hang around by wolfhalls 

“Din comes to Mos Pelgo, and finds a lot more than he was looking for.”

and finally, rough day by @no-droids​, because we all need to be a little indulgent sometimes.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #217

“roses are red, and my heart is black. we creep about the floor to indulge like rats.”

Do you know anyone who works in a laboratory? No. What was the very first social media site you signed up for? MySpace. Can you see yourself marrying your current partner? (if you have a partner) Easily. If you were in a coma, who would be making healthcare decisions for you? My mom. Are you the type of person who knows exactly what they want in life? Not entirely, but mostly. Do you have commitment issues? Not at all. What was the last thing you had an allergic reaction to? Silver. Have you gone out to dinner in the past week? No. What’s something you’ve done that sounds too crazy to be true? The only thing I think someone would actually find "crazy" would be I've been in a psychiatric hospital five or six times (I seriously can't remember). Are there any flowers planted outside your house? No. Well, not by us. There's a camellia tree by our back door that we didn't plant. What’s the weirdest decoration you’ve seen in someone else’s home? I'unno. I generally don't find decorations strange. Spice up your house with what you like. Did you have your own bathroom when you were growing up? No. Do you know anyone who never disciplines their children? I know of people. What’s the longest you’ve gone without leaving the house? Weeks. Are you more of a practical thinker, or more of an imaginative thinker? I think I can be on either end depending on the situation. Does anyone in your family smoke? My dad does. How well do you know your neighbors? I've never interacted with the ones to the right of us, but Mom knows the woman to the left, and she's apparently very nice. Mom was talking about her just the other day about how she always brings our trash can back to the fence, actually. How far are you into the book you’re currently reading? N/A Have you ever had a pet escape and run away? I don't believe so, at least not permanently. Do any of your exes know each other? Jason and Juan did. Girt and Jason know each other because of me; we all hung out a few times. It's both funny and sad now to know how friendzoned Girt was... ha ha. Sorry man. What’s an opinion you find impossible to take seriously? "Dinosaurs didn't exist." What the fuck are fossils then, bitch. What was the very first election you voted in? I haven't voted in any yet. Do you know how to make omelettes? No. I could probably figure it out, but I don't know for sure. What is your favorite summer month? Fuck summer. What do you want to be for Halloween this year? One of the witches from Hocus Pocus would be super cool, but yeah, I don't have the money to even try to make a costume. Do you have a desk in your room? If so, do you use it as a desk that you sit and work at? No. Do you wear band tees? if yes, which one is your favorite? Yes. I love my Metallica one. It's got a really cool design. Would you ever want to live in a home with all-white walls and furniture? "Not white furniture, no. That seems like it’d be a pain to keep clean." <<< Definitely. Do you have pajama days often? I'm literally always in pjs unless I have to leave the house and get out of the car. There's no point in changing otherwise; I'd just be creating more laundry. What is one thing you’re behind on? Instead of the usual "life in general" answer, I'll make it more interesting. RP. Jesus fucking holy Christ, I am over a year behind in SO MUCH because I just haven't had motivation, all the while plots have grown like mad. Thank god my partners are really damn patient, lol. And/or have other business, too. Do you ever re-arrange your room? No. I HATE moving/changing shit. Do you share a room with anyone? No. Who was your first roommate? Jason, Jacob, and Amanda. What season do you want to get married in? AUTUMN!!!!!!!! FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Frosting: chocolate or vanilla? Chocolate. Ice cream: chocolate or vanilla? Vanilla. Milkshake: chocolate or vanilla? Chocolate, more often. Do you drink protein shakes? EW that shit mad gross. What was the last type of candy you ate? Uhhhh what was it. I don't have candy a lot now, so uh... I think Airheads? What was the last craft project you completed? It was VERY weakly a "craft," but Sara's first Valentine's Day present. Which is better: starting things or finishing them? Finishing. I start things all the damn time and never finish them. What is the highest name-brand thing you own? Good question. What color GameBoy did you have as a kid? Red. What was your favorite GameBoy game? Hm. I liked a lot. We had a whole case of different ones. I suppose maybe the Spyro one I could never get far into. But I liked it anyway because yeah. Spyro. What was your favorite Backstreet Boys song? "The Call" probably tops the list, but also you're full of shit if you thought "Larger Than Life" wasn't a fuckin BANGER. Damn, "The Shape of My Heart" was great, too. BSB were/are just great, man. Did you ever wonder what it felt like to get slimed? Ha ha you mean like on Nickelodeon? Yup. Did you ever name a pet after an imaginary friend? I never had one. Do you believe in angels and demons? I don't know. I believe in spirits, but I don't know about actual angels and demons. Do you have a PayPal account? No. What race do you consider yourself? ... You can "consider" yourself a race? You don't get to pick that. Whatever, I'm Caucasian. Should unwanted animals in shelters be killed to make room? Fuck that shit. Should cows be killed for human food? See, this is why I want to return to vegetarianism. TECHNICALLY, no. It's murder upon a conscious, feeling, living being. But at the same time, humans are designed as omnivores, and surviving off of a plant-based diet is, sadly, extremely difficult. It's difficult to obtain the proper nutrients and their advised amounts to be healthy. Therefore, I can't confidently answer this question. I wish they didn't have to be, but human civilization would have an incredibly more difficult time continuing with all meat products removed for consumption. Does the technique used to kill an animal matter to you? I mean if I KNEW, yes, but at least from the research I've done, there's no real "humane" method used to kill livestock. Most live in awful conditions/are already unhealthy, too, and that should matter . Should farmers be allowed to cause suffering in animals to save money? Fuck off. Should production of medicines be justification to cause animals to suffer? No. We neeeeeeed to find other ways. Use pedophiles or some shit. Should violence against animals; such as rodeos/ bullfights be legal? Fuck to the hell no. I get some kind of dark pleasure out of hearing about shitheads being gored and stuff for it, honestly. Should homosexuals be allowed to work with children? This shit pisses me the fuck off. Of course they should be. Like I'm sorry, but your children aren't going to be hidden from them forever. Do you believe homosexuality is caused by genetics? Well yeah. You don't get to choose your sexuality; something has to be responsible. Are Americans are truly free, or suffering from controlled freedom? CONTROLLED FREEDOM JFC TRY TO DENY IT. Are there other countries that offer more personal freedoms? Not that I KNOW of. Like yeah, my above answer clearly states I think America could be better, but I don't know I place where it's actually better. Do you trust your government? Fuck no. They hide a lot of shit. Should religious beliefs outweigh science in the making of laws? Lolololololol no, hunny. Separation of church and state. What is one moment that you missed out on that you wished you didn’t? Hm. OH, that solar eclipse that happened I think last year? We saw nothing here. :< Do you or have you ever had braces? For a long time. Got them on, then didn't have the money to take them off for a while. Can you text? Yeah, but not quickly. I am - usually - very thankful for autocorrect. Have you ever had a nervous breakdown? OH BOY HAVE I!!!!!!!!!!!! What are you scared to death of? My mom dying, for one. I DO NOT know what would happen to me. Are you good at art? I'm told so at least; I'm aware I'm at least decent. It also depends on the art form. Are you afraid of needles? Nah. What TV show is the stupidest to you? I honestly had a really big problem (and have, if it's still even on) with the Teen Mom series. Yes, I do in fact believe it made looking like one cooler and more normal than it is. Do you hate being ignored? Yes; I start to think I'm not cared about, badly. Especially if it's family or "friends." Like no, I don't at all expect attention constantly, or even a lot of it, but I think it's only natural people who claim they love you should not pretend they don't know you, particularly when you actually reach out. THEN it hurts. Where do you currently live? North Carolina, please get me out. Do you like marijuana? I wouldn't know. Do you donate to charity? I can't. I seriously don't have money. Where is your favorite place to go out to eat? Olive Garden. What is your favorite TV station? Discovery. Do you think you’re clever? No. Did you wear socks today? No. I avoid wearing socks as much as I can. Know any magic tricks? I don't remember the ones I learned as a kid. Do you sleep well most nights? No. When’s the last time you baked a cake? Never. What’s your preferred frozen snack? Ice cream, yum. Do you work better in a clean or messy environment? CLEAN. It inspires me to do well and with an organized strategy. Do you know any vegans? I don't believe so. Earphones or headphones? I personally prefer earphones since they go into the ear and are just more comfortable than a weight on your head that can move easier. Do you like bananas? Yeah, but the timespan in which I enjoy them is short. They have to be "perfect." What’s a film you’ve seen that confused you? I know there are some, but none are coming to me curr- WAIT NO okay so I saw Warcraft when it came out into theaters, and I barely understood a single thing because the orcs' voices were way too deep. I need to rewatch it with subtitles. Do you ever wear black lipstick? I pretty much always do if I wear lipstick. What would you change about yourself appearance-wise? HEY can I Please fix my fucking weight??? Because I do like everything I can do already & nothing works??? :') How long do you normally spend in the shower? Just short of ten minutes, I think. If you were to get a tattoo, what would it say or what would the graphic be? *opens novel of ideas* Don't make me pick just one. When trick-or-treating as a kid, was there any kind of candy that you didn’t like to get? Tootsie rolls, ew. What is your favorite memory of Christmases past? The time my mom, sisters, and I went to a Christmas light show one night, and we got back to the car only to realize Mom left the keys in there. Sooo while we waited for my drunk dad and brother to come help us, we all chilled on the car's hood with chocolate covered peanuts and THE best hot chocolate. That place is no longer around, and I'll forever be mad tilted about it. What is the most outrageous thing you’ve done for God? Lmfao remember the days I denied evolution and gay rights? Them were the wild times. When you were in grade school, what did you want to be when you grew up? Why? First, paleontologist because I adored (and still adore) dinosaurs, then a vet as I wanted to help animals. In high school, it changed from movie director to game designer. Name the most famous person you’ve had a face to face encounter with. No one. If you could spend 15 minutes with any living person, who would it be and why? Um like have y'all ever heard of this guy named Mark Edward Fischbach because I have time to enlighten you of all the reasons- What article of clothing most closely describes your personality? Pj pants, lmao. Who was your hero when you were a child, and what did you do to be like them? Steve Irwin. I adore animals in general, push very firmly for conservation, and madly support proper education of wildlife, especially your local kinds. How did you learn to ride a bicycle? I had a bike with training wheels at first, then my dad took them off and would jog alongside me, holding the bars and then releasing them after a few moments for me to go on my own. Repeated 'til I got it! Based on something you’ve already done, how might you make it into the Guinness Book of World Records? This is going to be VERY embarrassing to share, but fuck it. I have so little reason to leave my bed that my legs have actually experienced muscle atrophy. My knees especially are extremely prone to awful pain when standing or walking. I don't really have a way to exercise in this tiny house, my road is too sketchy to walk along, and at least this time of year, I physically can't handle the heat if I was to walk in the back yard. I'm dying to go somewhere where I can swim to fix this shit. I could ramble on forever about how painful it is to be on my feet. I'd be happy enough with even just a treadmill. When was the last time you did something for the first time? What was it? Hm. I guess foreplay with a girl. I don't exactly experience new things much. What is your concept of a fruitful day? Actually doing productive shit. If you could rid the world of one thing, what would it be? Violence. What is your best personal characteristic? I am like, incredibly passionate. If I believe in something, you'll know. If I love something, it's to an insane degree. If you had to enter a competition for the “Most Uselessly Unique Talent,” what would your talent be? Being able to hide my thumb under my palm to where it looks like it's entirely non-existent lmao. What is your worst personality characteristic? I am VERY sensitive. I also have a hard time taking criticism without beating my ass up because I feel like I did something "bad." I don't get defensive, I just get hurt. Man, I could go on. There's a lot I don't like about myself. If you had to be a teacher of something, what would you teach? I'd be most interested in teaching science. How would you like to be remembered? I loved ferociously and spoke strong of peace. What is one thing that you constantly think about (other than material things)? The future. Does your country have free healthcare? *points at top five list of things America needs to fucking fix* Does your job allow visible tattoos? N/A How is your road rage? I drive so timidly and rarely that I don't think I really even have a clue. Who are your closest friends and how did you meet them? I'll exclude Sara as she's more than "a close friend." I don't have many close friends otherwise tho, so really... I think only Girt applies. We met in high school band. Well, then there's Alex, but considering she now acts like I don't exist as well, I don't know how close we really are. But anyway, we met in WoW because we were both camping the time-lost protodrake and talking w/ others in the general chat... but she and I really clicked. That was an awesome day. Started some damn adventures with her lmao. Are you still cool with any of your exes? The only two who may still have a problem with me are Jason and Tyler, but I have no bad feelings towards them. What Hogwarts House are you in? I took quizzes once for a survey because I was curious, but I couldn't answer most of the ones I found bc they had HP references I didn't get. But anyway, I think Hufflepuff and Gryffindor were pretty much tied. What’s the next special event in your life? Returning to school. :') Whose birthday is coming up soon? My nephew's. :''''') Do you delete people from Facebook if their views are vastly different than yours? It depends on the views and their severity. Usually I can handle averse opinions if you're actually a friendly person and composed and mature about what you believe and how you express that. What’s your favorite thing to put on bagels? Cream cheese. What’s the most important key on your key ring? I only have one, and that's to my house. What was the last argument you got in about and who was it with? AHAHAHAAHAHA okay so. There was a video on FB of a pet meerkat having its belly rubbed, and it was chirping happily. It was very cute, but especially because this video was on a big page, I commented how awful and unhealthy of an idea it is to have a pet meerkat for both it and yourself. It's illegal in a lot of places for good reason. I got a lot of agreement, but of course there was one imbecile who disagreed enough to tell me to shut the fuck up. Now I am normally very, very terrified of confrontation or even the HINT of it, but for once in my life I couldn't have been more unfazed. At what age did you start picking out your own outfits? I don't know. I've come to find via surveys that I can't really remember events by ages. How spicy do you like your food? Pretty spicy. Spicier than most like, but I don't enjoy it when it's just pure pain. What was the last really intense pain you felt? You know that awwwfuuuulll pinch of pain you sometimes get in your ribs when your lungs expand to a certain, small amount? That. I couldn't take deep breaths for anything. What is the best thing that’s ever happened to you? Recovery from the breakup. What are three things you have been a victim of? Uhhhh. Idk, nothing major. What is your passion? Wildlife conservation, probably more than anything. When was the last time you truly felt alive? Ha, good question. How many siblings do you have? Technically six, but I don't know one at all. Are you married? No. Are you dating someone? Yeah. If not, do you wish you were dating someone? N/A Do you want an indoor or outdoor wedding? I'm not sure. What states (or countries) have you lived in? Just one. Does your first crush know you liked them? No. Do you wish on stars? Nope. Are you happier now than you were 10 years ago? I don't know. I can't really remember exactly what I was like at 13. I think I'm maybe happier now? Are you happier now than you were 5 years ago? Yes. ^If not, why not? N/A ^If yes, why? My depression is under control. Do you live in your dream house? Definitely not. What was your first job? Sales clerk at GameStop. ^Did you like it? No, thanks to feral social anxiety. Have you been bullied? No, very thankfully. What do you wish people knew about you? I sincerely care about my loved ones, a lot, even though I have trouble being the one to reach out first. What health issues do you have? A lot. Don't even feel like putting them all together. Do you still cross paths with your first crush ever? No. What is your favorite Bible verse, and why? None. Do you have a secret nobody knows? Yes. It's nothing major, just little things I don't want to share. Who are some of the most selfish people you have ever met? I don't know. Is there anyone you want back in your life? Yes. What color was the house you grew up in? True shit, I somehow don't remember for sure. I think it was brick? What was the name of the first pet that you loved? Charcoal, a cat, was the first pet I had a serious, deep bond with. Do you receive more insults or compliments? Compliments, I guess. Do you meditate? No. Do you pray? No. Have you ever seen a spirit/ghost/shadowy figure, etc.? I've sure as hell seen something. What would you ask a genie for, if you had three wishes? World peace, end of disease, and the end of poverty. When someone messages you and you know it’s going to be rude, do you ignore it and not read it, or do you read it and reply? Honestly, most of the time, I ignore it. I am so, SO sensitive, so my feelings are super easily hurt by what others have to say. Do you find online drama stressful? Yes. Even more than irl drama because you have to wait painstakingly for them to reply, and you can't hear their tone of voice. How stressful is your life? I'm pretty damn stressed for someone who's trapped inside their house lmao. Was any of your home decor inspired by Pinterest? No. Do you do yoga? No. What is something you have tried and hated? Oral is NOT my jazz. Do you have regrets? Yeah. Are you mad at someone? No. What is this month’s calendar picture? I don't have a calendar. What is your last ex-boyfriend’s or ex-girlfriend’s name? Technically Donald. Do you have an ex-friend that you miss? Yep. What color do you want your wedding dress to be? Most likely black. Would you rather go out for pancakes or steak? Pancakes. I like them more in general, and I'm also suuuper picky with steak. What’s your favorite Ramen noodle flavor? The only kind I've ever liked is the Yakisoba brand of spicy chicken. How do you feel when you read the Bible, if you read it? Encouraged? Angry? I don’t read it. Have you ever suffered from anxiety? I had some anxieties as a little kid, and I was officially diagnosed with it in the 6th grade. Have you ever suffered from depression? Since the 7th grade. What is something a lot of people like but you don’t? Pie is what came to mind first. What’s an uplifting song you like to listen to? "High Hopes" by P!ATD. Think about the person you fell hardest for. Why do you think your feelings for this person were so strong? How is he/she different compared to everyone else you’ve had feelings for? Well, he was my first real love. They're always special. I was fucking crazy for him, and it grew to an unhealthy degree. Trust me, you can love too much. He made me happy when so few could back then, and we had a connection unprecedented in my whole life. He himself felt like my home. I could write you a goddamn novel on why I felt so strongly. Have you ever caught your friend cheating on their boyfriend/girlfriend? If you have, what did you do about it? If you haven’t, what do you think you would do? No. Quite honestly, I'd tell them. I could NOT keep that a secret. Whether they believe me or not, I'm not withholding that from them. When your last relationship ended, how long was it before you felt ready to think about being with someone else? I know this technically sounds bad, but Sara and I started dating the day after I broke up with him. One of the reasons we split is because I realized I liked her. It was so quick because I never had to "move on;" I never came to be truly interested in him romantically. Who was the last person you talked to before you went to sleep last night? Do you remember what you talked about? Sara and I were texting, but I don't remember about what. When are you at your happiest? When I'm with Sara. How many people have you kissed? Three or four. I don't really remember if I ever kissed Girt. How many of those people are you still friends with? Two. Where did you go, the last time you left your house? Mom and I went to multiple places. She had errands to run. Do you like your singing voice? Rarely. I think it fits only a few songs. Are most silences awkward for you? UH-HUH UH-HUH. Name someone you wish you had never met. Why? Jabari. He was scary and almost assaulted someone in my family. Who has the nicest singing voice, that you know personally? Probably Sara. Say something nice about someone you really don’t care for: He loves his kids to death. Ever won school awards? Yes. Do you drink more soda than anything else? Not anymore, thankfully. Do you curse a lot? I curse possibly more than anyone you know. Have you ever been in a courtroom? Yes. Do you eat a lot around Thanksgiving? No. I actually don't like 99% of Thanksgiving food. Were you a chubby child? No. Are you afraid to sing in front of people? Yes. Do you enjoy your family? Yeah. When did you last dance with someone? I forced Sara to last June lmao. Do you feel awkward watching sex scenes? VERY. Did you ever have senior photos done? No. Are your parents protective of you? Mom is for sure. I don't see my father much, and he's changed a LOT since the divorce, so I can't really answer for him. I know he is to some degree, I just don't know how much. Have you ever been bullied? I've had some mean shit said to me, but I don't believe I've ever really been consistently "bullied." Do you ever help decorate during the holidays? No. I just don't have the motivation and don't really care enough to put things up that're only coming down in two months. Do you have carpeted floors? Only my room and my sis's old one. Can you count to ten in another language? German, yeah. Have you ever been arrested? No. Do you always lock your door at night? Yeah. Do you get allowance? No, never did. Do you have a Facebook? Yes. Do you enjoy the presence of children? In most cases, no.

[psychoangiethings]

The Bloodline [Roman Godfrey x Reader]

A/N: I know, I know, no Roman so far but he’s in this chapter! Enjoy.

Warning: Adult themes & language, murder

Other tags: Magic, friends to lovers, slow build, nightmares, witches, upirs

Summary: After very suspicious car crash that killed both of her parents, Abigail Wolff moves in with her aunt to Hemlock Grove only to discover a truly interesting family history which her father kept from her. As she awakens her powers, something much older and terrifying is coming after her. Or maybe not after her at all.

Chapter 3

Masterlist

Chapter 4 - What’s up, Wolff?

17th November 2016

I started fourth week with my broken ribs. It was getting fucking annoying but they didn't hurt so much as they did in the beginning. I was learning a fair amount about herbs, tried to memorize some quick and useful spells. Slowly it started to get in my mind. Erika was happy about it but I needed to try harder. She always left me some books to read but soon there was nothing left. Erika didn't want me to read our ancestors's things so I made my own 'book' of things I knew and find useful. I called it my own personal 'portable grimoire'.

When she handed me some journals and grimoires about symbols, how to use them and combine them, I got an idea. Since our talk passed a week or so and I wanted to know if dad was possessed by something. Erika told me it was possible - that's why she wore those charms and rings everyday.

I told her I thought that someday I could find myself in situation when none of it I will be able to wear or I'll simply forget one thing and then what? I'll end up dead in some fucking alley? Firstly she wasn't so happy about it, but thought about my idea and then allowed it.

We drove to another town where no one knew us and I got myself my first tattoo. More like one big across my whole back with UV ink. And we had to go back three times because he couldn't do it in one session. So yeah, I got tattoo no one could see but I felt safer and Erika told me it was a pretty good idea. I was protected and no one could tell I'm a witch or suspected me of it. Right there I was that weird chick with a cool aunt.

"How're your ribs?" Her voice brought me back from my thoughts.

"Much better."

"So you're ready for a few quick rounds?" It wasn't much of a question but I nodded. When I got frustrated one day that learning names of stupid herbs won't help me and I'm just fed up, Erika made a game out of it. And every day we walked through her garden and I was supposed to answer her questions. Sometimes she would tell me name and I would tell her what the herb is for and how can you use it. Sometimes she just pointed at some and I had to tell her the name. In the basement she practised spells with me. And they were a pain in the ass. The oldest ones weren't translated (they had description of what they do though) and maybe it wasn't even language from our world. Spells translated from latin? Easy peasy lemon squeezy.

My mind was quick to adjust to situation in which we were but what if somebody attacked me and my mind went blank? What if I couldn't remember a single spell? Erika told me to run because one day my life could depend on how fast will I run.

Since I still couldn't go to school and let's be honest Erika made herself perfectly clear telling me why and when I will go, I was glad that Peter or his mother came by. I wasn't so self-confident to walk the streets of Hemlock Grove on my own yet. And honestly? I was scared. I was so fucking scared. Aunt told me it's a healthy reaction, that I'm healing and later I won't be feeling invincible like she did.

When I was in my room later that afternoon looking out of the small window near my bed, I could made out the shape of Rumancek's trailer on the other side of the river. I saw there two figures. One of them was definitely Peter but the second one didn't ring a bell. I knew they couldn't see me from so far away in such a small window but Peter said he would stopped by today and didn't say anything about another visitor.

He was my only friend I had here. And that was completely my fault since I was still buried in books or practising with Erika. I did became curious about Hemlock Grove so she told me stories and how it is today. She spoke about the Godfrey family, how a few years back they closed the Steel Mill and built Godfrey Institute. How a lot of people lost their jobs and were forced to look somewhere else or go to the Institute.

"Why do you live here? Why not somewhere else?" I asked Erika in the evening, when we were eating dinner.

"Because wether I like it or not, some Wolff has to live here. Not to mention the supernatural creatures who live in this town. One day we may need their help or the other way around. Some of them are very powerful and old. Or they come from old blood."

"Such as?"

"Such as you will know in the right time. I can't tell you everything. Some things you need to find out for yourself."

I was going to give her a piece of my mind, I really was, but there was a soft knock on our door. I got up and opened them. "Ah, Peter Rumancek. My only friend in this Hellhole. Where's your friend?"

He grinned at me. "It's not my problem you don't have friends and what friend are you talking about?" He carefully walked past me, avoiding my ribs and I closed the door. "Hi, Erika!"

"Hi, Peter."

"Go upstairs. You know where my room is." I told him and picked up my plate with dinner. "I'll eat it in my room." She only nodded because it became during the last few weeks a habit for Peter to show up this late. Sometimes he came with his mum but not today.

"So, what about your friend?" I asked him again, watching how he spread himself on my bed.

"What friend?"

"The one I saw through that window," I pointed behind him with my fork and grimaced, "earlier this day. He was taller than you." Fucking ribs. I seated myself on my comfy chair and put in my mouth another bite of risotto, watching Peter closely.

"And that taller than you friend, is Roman."

My eyebrows furrowed. "You didn't mention that name. I know that Lynda is your mother," he gave me affirmative nod, "Destiny is your cousin," another nod, "and that's basically everyone you've ever talked about. You, my friend, are very secretive," I talked with full mouth and pointed my fork at him again.

"Firstly - you, my second friend who isn't from family, are disgusting. Shut your mouth and eat. And secondly it isn't my problem. If you would be so kind and stopped playing a mole and went out to meet actual people, then I wouldn't be your only friend."

I sat quietly, finishing the rest of my meal and then spoke my mind. "I'm scared, Peter. I'm not even healed yet. I can't go to school yet but I'm tired of being here all the time. Even those trees in our backyard are pissing me off."

Peter was looking at me curiously, just lifted himself on his elbows and kept staring. "Are you sure it's just because of your ribs? Aren't you afraid of something else?"

I knew Peter knew about the supernatural side of our world. But I still wasn't entirely sure what to made of it. He never told me how exactly he came to that knowledge or if he had real witches in the family. I started nervously tugging my sleeve and that was the only answer he needed.

"Look. Tomorrow we'll go to the cake shop in downtown. I'll buy you an ice-cream."

"Peter, it's November."

"Who cares? Sometimes all you need is an ice-cream so stop bitching."

×

So the next day, in November, we went into town to get some ice-cream. Saying I was only nervous would be a big fucking lie. I was enormously bigh bundle of nerves and every unexpected noise made me jump but Erika was pleased with my progress, saying that I needed to get out of my comfort zone. So here I was. In front of our house waiting for Peter fucking Rumancek, who always got his way and my aunt supported him in it.

When he finally showed up, shit-eating grin spreading across his face, I wanted to slap him.

"What's up, Wolff? Can't wait for the tour?"

I rolled my eyes at him but smiled anyway. Our walk to the shop wasn't the fastest, I needed to make small breaks which were filled with Peter's sarcastic humour. Then he spoke about his family with a great passion and love. We exchanged stories. I told him about my seventh birthday when I broke my arm because of my stupidity. He told me about his uncle Vince and grandfather Nicolae.

"So what flavor do you want?" he asked me once we were inside the shop.

"If they have vanilla, I'll take it."

×

For the first afternoon outside of the house I wasn't feeling bad. Actually I realized I kind of did miss it. Small talks of other people, the rush of the town, rumbling of car's engine, that weird noises like from some porn... wait. What? I stopped in my tracks on the pavement and Peter did the same. "What?"

"Do you hear that?" I asked like an idiot and took a look around myself. The only thing I saw was empty parking lot. Well, there was one car. With clouded windows even though they we opened a bit. Oh! Peter looked in the same way as I did and began walking again. "Come on, that's Roman's car." It didn't sound like a big news to him and I just stared at the car. "You coming?!"

I actually needed to speed up a bit so I could maintain the same pace with him. "Uhm, did you hear that too?"

"It was from Roman's car. Don't sweat it." He told me and immediately laughed about the double-edged sentence.

I was taken aback. A little bit. "So your mysterious friend is normally having sex with strangers in his car?"

Peter gave me amused look and shook his head. "He's not mysterious but I'll tell him you'll think of him that way."

"Ah, fucking great!"

×

Roman was waiting in old Godfrey Steel Mill for Peter who was running a bit late. He paced and lit up a cigarette. That girl today, who he fucked senseless, was good distraction but he couldn't fucking wait for better weather when girls will wear skirts again. Also he thought he saw today Peter with someone but it wasn't Letha.

"Roman! Enjoyed your little afternoon fuck in car?" Peter said instead of classic welcome and laughed.

Godfrey exhaled smoke and rolled his eyes. "I thought I saw you there! Who the fuck was with you? She stared at my car like she couldn't believe it."

"She's a new friend and thinks about you you're my mysterious best friend who daily fucks strangers in his car," answered Peter amusedly and grabbed a beer from the six-pack Roman brought with him.

"Well, she certainly wouldn't be wrong. Keep her close, she's a clever one."

[yourghastlycloseness]

i’ve just finished reading dazai’s schoolgirl. browsed, more like, since i wasn’t savouring every sentence. i tend to skip lengthy descriptions of nature. barley plants and big meadows — it’s all the same to me. early haiku poets wrote exalted nature in their work; maybe i like a poet’s heart. i scoff at sentimentality. i dislike the use of the trees, the fields, the rose etc. as metaphors. it’s all too soft and expressed in such exquisite language. i have no time for pretty words.

dazai’s schoolgirl wakes up in the morning and hates it. she is me; i am her. she talks about a barley plant or something. thinks the people around her are disgusting, but that she also seeks beauty, wants to love everyone, and wants to love beautifully. we see her swing from thinking cruel thoughts about her crippled dog, aptly named poo, but later thinking about him with more tenderness, as the day is about to end — the whole novella is a schoolgirl’s inner monologue over the course of a single day. took screenshots of a few quotes i liked.

there was another passage from the book that i liked. the schoolgirl recounts an act of kindness during a trip she took to yamagata. she was climbing a mountain and had chanced upon beautiful lilies growing halfway up the cliff. a miner gathered the lilies and, wordlessly and unsmilingly, handed all the flowers to her.

kawakami’s people from my neighbourhood was a collection of pointlessly bizarre character sketches. there’s an old man who is a principal of a school that trains dogs; there’s a stupid bitch by the name of kanae who has sex with boys in the neighbourhood on the rooftop of her house, like lux in the virgin suicides — she’s mostly mean and manipulative. you read on, hoping she’ll die a brutal death but no, she’s revealed to have gone off to france and accomplished something huge to make the townsfolk proud; kanae has a sister who believes she has a spiritual calling. one day she stumbles upon this magical bird-like thing that smells like shit. it turns into a nice boy about her age. they grow old, fuck each other, then some catastrophe threatens to destroy the town.

funny read. i enjoyed the humour. it was much less of a bore than strange weather in tokyo. something’s missing though — warmth, maybe? but you find that in the woman who runs The Love.

[aslimyartist]

Welcome to Camp! Part 1

It was the first day of summer as we see a young hedgehog get ready to leave for her summer camp as she had got dressed in her usual burgundy sweater and her skirt she had been waiting forever to leave her house for the summer and now she will finally get to leave as she rushed down stairs to eat breakfast much to her surprise she seen her parents weren't there just a note saying.

Dear Hedgehog, Sorry something urgent came up at work so we had to come handle it but don't worry we asked  mr.Leroy to take you the docs today just make sure to be prep and dominant break their fucking will with your gaze make sure none try to push you over and don't make friends make business deals and partners as well and since you're gonna be gone for a while I guess try making one friend as well and only one.

P.S. We Acknowledge your feelings with our regards Enjoy your summer honey

                                                                                                                                         Love Mom & Dad.

(Hedgehog POV)

Well at least they left me a note I guess I'll just eat some breakfast before mr.Leroy gets here then

What shall I make tho Pancakes,Waffles,Toast,Eggs,French Toast does sound good. Mann they're all good I know I'll make a bowl of cereal because I don't know how to cook well now where's the bowls again ah hah here we go now for the cereal and it's bland as hell bleeeehh but it's something so let's eat.

8:00 a.m.

Argh where is mr.Leroy the boat leaves in 30 minutes I now I can make it if I run but that's a long way

But I refuse to stay home for another summer let's go....yahhooooo.

8:30a.m.

I made it sorry mr.Le-

*Ring Ring*

*Ring Ring*

*Ring Ring*

H-Hell-

HEDGEHOG WHY DIDN'T YOU PICK IT UP THE FIRST TIME IT HAD RANGED AND ALSO WHY DID MR. LEROY YOU COULD'VE BEEN KIDNAPPED OR SOMETHING.

did she pick up?

Yes!

Oh thank god!

Anyway Hedgehog we just wanted to call you before you left remember wh-

Wha- The Not- Said-

Mom I have to go the boats are coming and plus there's a bunch static for some reason

Oh ok remember make acquaintances and be dominant

Yeah love you too! Mom

I acknowledge your feelings as well hedgehog.

Phone hangs up

As I got on the boat I seen that most kids were with their parents looking around and some were sitting down enjoying the ocean smell.As I looked at the city it looked so small from that distance and I might as well take a good little nap till we get to our destination but I'm still a little curious why summer camp is so far *shrugs shoulders * I'm just glad not to be home this summer.

But before I could close my eyes I seen a flash next thing I know I was knocked out.

(End of Hedgehog's POV)

As the boat was sailing through the sea to the island with all its passengers knocked unconscious as three girls flew on the boat and took control of it making sure everything went according to plan and as they put small tablets in the parents mouth.

???-are you sure this is right I mean won't they want to know their parents and where they came from as well.

???-oh you worry to much besides I already have taken that to mind as soon they get back on the boat. (snicker).

???-oh yeah that snickering is so not suspicious at all

???- uhh guys the boats is in the islands view I think it's time to go now.

???-Alright! That's all of them let's go.Hold on why are their two adult elephants where's their child...hmmm...oh well don't care to much anyway.

And with that they flew to the island getting the preparations completed.

                                                    ————On The boat————

As everybody woke up to the sound of the whistle or horn on the boat telling them there here. As soon as they docked all of the kids ran out onto the beach and as hedgehog was leaving she seen two very concerned elephants looking for their child

?!-Don't worry I'm sure he's just down there with all the others having a good time making new friends that's all.

Sue-I guess.

?!-why don't you go give him his hoodie I'll wait for ya because I know how you two will just be there forever with the goodbyes.

Sue playfully elbows him in the gut.

Sue- Alright I'll be quick.

As The Elephant walked towards one of the counselors.

Oh hello there my name is Susie I'm one of the counselors here

Sue- oh wow my name is Sue! I'm just here to give you my special little guy's hoodie you know this is his first time being far from home try to help with his anxiety if ya can.

Oh what's his name?

Sue-It's Oscar Peltzer!

Oh well thank you then I'll make sure he gets it then have a safe trip back

And as she left and got back on the boat she started to feel light headed and sat down with her husband so as they sailed off her light headness became worse as blood started to come from her nose  and as her husband tried to help her up he started to feel it himself he started to vomit As he looked at the other parents were screaming in pain most of them were wailing in their own blood while from the island view it sounded like they were saying goodbye but they're crying because they know that this will be the last time that they will see their children. As sue got up and said (WE ALL GOTTA LEAVE SOMEDAY ITS ALLRIGHT TO CRY SOMETIM-) more blood is coming out of her nose as starts to lose consciousness she uses the strength to crawl to her husband as they locked their hands and closed their eyes for the final time. Every adult on board has passed away

(Oscar we love you so much enjoy your summer make friends okay!)

As the boat sailed off into the distance the three counselors knew what they had done and agreed to never say anything till the time comes as they transformed back into their witch clothing and as the inhabitants of the island revealed themselves.

Alright babies you thought you were coming to a normal camp you are sorely mistaken this is a magical camp for beings that are magic themselves and though were your counselors don't come crying to me about your dumb little baby problems especially that mommy's little boy.

Susie this speech gets scary every time I hear it don't scare them now

Oh relax they love it. DO YOU WANT TO SEE YOUR CABINS BABIES

YEEEAAAHHH!!!

Told ya!

As she took the kids to their new homes hedgehog stay behind to take it all in that were she is right now and since she calm now she's gonna to her new cabin inside it was a bunch of cool stuff she had a tv, and a bookshelf, her bed was so soft that she felt like she would sleep for two days straight as she started to unpack a small hand grabbed her foot it was transparent monster

-Woaaaahh

Don't be dramatic darling I'm only here to tell that this room is mine and I will not give up easy.

Uh...okay

And just so you know under the bed is my space and only my space if you come under here I will kill you and leave your bones to dry.

Gee I get it you don't have to be a jerk I'll just put my shoes by the door then

That's what I thought

2 hours later

Finally done it took me two hours but I'm finished

Attention all campers since it's the first night of camp we want you all on the beach for a little get together now hurry it up.

Well might as well I need to make some friends my age anyway( i might even get a summertime love.) I can't wait

Oh honey you need too.

Shut up you

As she left her cabin the monster went and read her diary

How dare she I'm gonna read her diary just for that...oh...my I'm just like my father aren't I.

As he looks at one of the accessories they nodded at him

Yur father did not I repeat did not respect secrets at all.

Oh...well at least he was a good man thanks grandma

Yur welcome child

Back to Hedgehog as she got closer she started to see more kids come out of there cabins but she waited and just waved at most of them as she was walking one kid named Max came up to talk with her since they were going to the same place anyway.

Hi I'm max

Oh hi I'm Hedgehog

(He's kinda cute)

Is this your first time coming to a summer camp

*Gasp* How did you know

I have SUUUUUPPPPEERRR PPPOOOWWWEERRRSSS!

She laughed at him as if anyone could have super powers as they got closer to the beach they seen the whole camp all dancing and enjoying their time together even the counselors were getting into it as well I started to run so I can get in there and do the same and the little d.j. Put on a song that caused everyone to go crazy.

I do not own this bitch I'm a fanfic writer Fuck! Enjoy Bitches

33 by Polo G

Yo, ayo

High off ecstasy and that codeine what I'm sippin' (What I'm sippin')

This new Glock got .33, Scottie Pippen (Scottie Pippen)

Bitch, all of my niggas bangin' C's

Like we Crippin' (Like we Crippin')

Girl, you got what I need, what I been missing (What I'm missing)

Let's take that chance, want you to see that I'm different (Oh)

Back then, tryna find myself

I couldn't believe how I was trippin' (Oh)

No neighbors in the mountains, palm trees

That's how I'm living (That's how I'm living)

Every time that I pop out

Bustdown VVs, designer drippin' (Designer drippin')

Bitch, I'm from Chiraq, when it get hot, they bring them TECs out

Better watch your back or you'll be on that corner stretched out

Quick to change a nigga standin' tall with his chest out

And they like headshots, it won't make sense to bring a vest out

Shit be devastatin', you find out your homie checked out

Parents lose control, don't know her daughter havin' sex now

Niggas hatin', I'm gettin' paper, that's what they pressed 'bout

Went down the wrong path, switched it up and chose the best route

I ain't used to have it all, I used to feel left out

'Member I was broke, ain't have a dollar, I was stressed out

Now I'm tryna get richer, like Blast, let's bring the jets out

Bitch, I need like ten bathrooms up in my next house

High off ecstasy and that codeine what I'm sippin'

This new Glock got .33, Scottie Pippen

Bitch, all of my niggas bangin' C's like we Crippin'

Girl, you got what I need, what I been missing

Let's take that chance, want you to see that I'm different

Back then, tryna find myself, I couldn't believe how I was trippin'

No neighbors in the mountains, palm trees, that's how I'm living

Every time that I pop out, bustdown VVs, designer drippin'

Got a baby .40 with a new extended clip inside

For any problem, bitch, it's .22 up in this clip of mine

My peoples lookin' up to me, so no, I can't be victimized

I got so much pent-up anger, I just wish a nigga tried

You gon' die before you blink, yeah, that's gon' be a quick demise

The world be so fucked up, that shit'll have you sick and tired

1 1/2 hour later...

We were all sitting round the camp fire telling stories , making s'mores, and I'm pretty sure the younger ones are probably asleep already it felt right and good this is what I've been missing all my life this is amazing...no exhlirating I've never had so much fun in my life and this is only the first night.

Susie- Alright babies listen up it's getting dark so return to your cabins for the night. Tomorrow you lots will be introducing each other got it.

(All): Awwww c'mon

That's Unfair

Yeah why do we gotta go to bed

It makes no since

Really

*yawn*I guess but still not cool tho.

Ok

Auuugghhhh

Susie- Oh Shut Up!

They all had shut up

Susie- Betsy! Alice! Can you take care of them I have some business to take care of. (Summons her broom)

With that she flew off on her broom with something blue like in her hand as hedgehog wondered what it was she was magically picked up and being taken to her cabin just like everyone else just as she was in front of her cabin the magic poofed away making her fall on her tush.

Hedgehog-Oww that hurt couldn't you be any gentler maybe.

???-hey are you alright.

Hedgehog-huh oh yeah just a little mark but I'll be fine.

???-oh well see ya.

Hedgehog- w-wa..wait I don't know your name

???-oh well I'll tell you tomorrow then but right now I'm very sleepy so yeah uh goodnight.

As the girl left hedgehog just shrugged and went in her cabin to sleep and when she went in she had seen a box and a letter in a envelope it said

Dear Hedgehog,

My apologies I have been informed to tell you this but due to a terrible accident happening at a workplace environment it has taken the lives of your parents. We are terribly sorry please forgive us we understand if you want to sue us once you return you have our regards.

Hedgehog-T..Th..this c-can't...be h-h-appe...nni...nng  please god this has to be a nightmare please just let me  *hic* w..wa..wake..*cough* up...please.

Oh Hedgehog dear I'm so sorry I'll just let you have sometime to grieve honey.

And with that he left and never came back

She wasn't the only one either everyone has gotten one as well but different deaths

Murdered

Suicide

Hit and Run

[the-novelwriter]

RED.

By: Sherrieff Farrakhan

“MEOW.”

I looked up from carving my pumpkin to see what Mr. Drogo wanted. He always wanted attention when my hands were messy.

“What do you want now Mr. Drogo?”

“MEOW.”

He jumped up on the kitchen counter sniffing the innards of the pumpkin that I had just disemboweled, and that’s when I realized I hadn’t fed him yet and it had been almost twelve hours since the last time he had eaten. I walked over to the cabinet and took out a can of wet cat food. I remember when I first got him. He was the cutest little tiger striped orange kitten with blue eyes that I had ever laid eyes on. The rest of his litter had been sold and for some reason no one wanted him. He was my perfect pet though.

“Here you go baby, mommy’s sorry she’s been neglecting you today.”

I put the food in his bowl, gave him a pat, and resumed my pumpkin carving extravaganza. Halloween was one of my favorite holidays, mostly because I loved the smell of the crisp air and the mirage of colors produced by the annual death of trees. It was like the unofficial official start of Autumn. I also liked that I could be anyone but myself one day out of the year with no questions asked. It made being a plain Jane so much more tolerable, and the look on people’s faces when they saw me dressed in my sexy, insert profession here, costume was to die for.

Once I finished with my third pumpkin, an angry faced one, I took them outside and lit them. I took a deep breath and looked down at my works of art. They looked like a depressed boy band on the verge of a split. I giggled to myself and walked back inside, feeling my phone vibrating in my pocket. I washed my hands and checked it, almost missing the call.

“Hello?”

“Hey girl, me and Mark will be there in an hour at about eight-ish, I got the liquor and the Maryjane!” Nicki laughed, putting emphasis on the last word like I was too anal to know what she meant.

“Okay cool, let me clean this place up, I got pumpkin guts everywhere.”

“Alright, see you in a few!”

I hung up the phone and immediately got to cleaning. I hated having people over when my apartment was dirty, it was just a bit too small for extra people and mess. Four hundred square feet of space is just enough to have about two guests and a cat. I looked around my small apartment, the used brown couch and chair that came with it looking like they belonged to a grandparent from two generations ago. The cheap coffee table and end table set a little shinier than it should have been. It was a bit run down but it was mine. I had lived in it for two years now and I loved it.

“MEOW.”

“I know boy, just have to make sure everything is clean,” I responded to him. I hated making him uncomfortable, but sometimes I had too. He hissed and ran into my bedroom when I turned the vacuum cleaner on.

***

“Girl I cannot believe you got another picture printed out of you and that cat, we are in college and you’re already an old cat lady,” Nicki said.

“Oh, girl leave her alone, he’s the only male affection she has,” Mark chimed in. They both erupted into laughter. I don’t know if it was actually funny or if it was the weed, but we laughed for a few good minutes before I finally had a comeback.

“This is coming from a guy who hasn’t had a date since freshman year,” I responded with a sarcastic smile. “Your love life is about as dry as mine.”

He rolled his eyes and took another hit from the bowl. Me, Nicki, and Mark had been friends since freshman year of college, and we were now seniors. We had had our fair share of ups and downs but at the end of the day it made our relationship stronger. People always wondered how a black inner-city Chicago girl, became friends with me, an uptight white girl from Ohio, and Mark a flamboyant gay Asian boy from California. Nicki would defend our friendship with a ferocity whenever people asked her why she was friends with us. which happened a bit more often than I’d like to admit.  

“Because they are genuinely amazing people! It’s extremely small minded of you to think that I can’t relate to people of different cultures!” She yelled at one of her other acquaintances one day while we were out at a bar. His eyes got big and he made his way to a different crowd, not ready to face her wrath.

Me and Mark were quiet with awkward grins frozen to our faces. She looked over at us.

“I absolutely hate when other black people act like I can’t be friends with you guys because of my background, yes I’m a little hood but I am smart as hell…” She said to us as her eyes drifted to the floor. “I really care about you guys.”

“Girl we love you, fuck what small minded people have to say. We are sugar, spice, and everything nice honeeey,” Mark said to her with a level of sass that could only be topped by hers. We both laughed and gave her hugs to reassure her of our friendship. I knew she loved us, but I sometimes felt bad because her own community was a bit ostracizing

“Girl those pumpkins look like us when we’re mad at each other,” Nicki said interrupting my daydream.

“Can I hit that one more time?” I asked, reaching for the weed. “I didn’t think about it but yes they do!” I laughed almost choking on the smoke.

“Oh, I see someone is trying to get turnt up in here tonight,” responded Nicki with a smile.

“Well since midterms are over, I thought why the hell not?” I laughed. “You want me to make us some drinks?”

“Yaaaas!” Mark responded with his famous spirit fingers, the glitter paint on his nails sparkling in the dim overhead light.

“Just for the dramatics you get water,” I teased as I got up from the table.

“I have something to show you guys,” Mark said when I came back from mixing our drinks.

He was sitting there, holding his book bag with a big mischievous smile on his face. I never knew what to expect from him. He was the most unpredictable friend in our group, but it made things more exciting for the most part. Planning random road trips, throwing surprise parties, showing up to his friends’ houses without fair warning. He was the full package.  

“So, I went to visit a psychic yesterday to get my readings, and well I saw this old spell book and asked her if I could buy it from her, you know? Something spontaneous and creepy,” He reached into his bag pulling the book out. “She was reluctant at first, but after about fifteen minutes of warning me of ‘dark powers’ she sold it to me for $100. Of course, I had to convince her that I wouldn’t utter a word from the book aloud before she let me leave.”

The book was leather bound but looked like it had been through some rough days in its lifetime. He shuffled through it revealing missing and stained pages.

“You think my black ass is about to play with a spellbook?” Nicki questioned, moving her chair away from the small round table. “Especially one that you were specifically warned not to read from, Oh hell no!”

I laughed, finding myself drawn to the book. The alcohol and weed were really starting to kick in now and I felt in the mood for something spooky. I didn’t really believe in magic and spirits, so I didn’t care about the psychic’s warning.

“Let me see,” I said taking the book from Mark.

I flipped through the pages, not recognizing the language at all. I found a short spell and thought I would give Nicki a scare, I did owe her for making fun of me and Mr. Drogo. I recited the words in my head once before trying them out loud.

“Zü-rad fres-ah dor-ium khalê—”

“Oh, hell no bitch, stop!” Nicki tried snatching the book, but I moved away and stood up. I began again.

“Zü-rad fres-ah dor-ium khalê morti-ūn sherán”

I repeated it three times while running from Nicki, who unsuccessfully attempted to take the book. I eventually came back to the table and sat, out of breath. Mark had been laughing the whole time watching the two-woman production we had just performed. Nicki, on the other hand, looked visibly bothered.

“I’m sorry, I had to get you back for making fun of me and Mr. Drogo,” I said.

“Girl whatever, you know I don’t like that spooky shit. I need a shot,” She got up from the table and went into the kitchen to get more vodka.

“I wonder what it means,” said Mark, while looking over the page. “I’m going to google it.”

I suddenly started to feel uneasy and light headed. It was like the weed and vodka had started to hit me full force.

“I feel kind of light heade—”

***

“Shannon, Shannon,” I heard their voices calling out to me.

I opened my eyes and for a few seconds I couldn’t see anything. Eventually my eyes adjusted, and I saw Mark and Nicki standing over me.

“Girl what the fuck!?” Nicki half asked half screamed. “What happened?”

“I feel okay I just think I over did it on the weed,” I tried to explain.

I was a lot more scared than I let on. I had never passed out before, it makes your body feel so weak when you come back to consciousness. I was also nervous because smoking and drinking had never made that happen before.

“That has never happened to me before, maybe I shouldn’t have mixed the two,” I muttered. “I need some water.”

“Hold up Shan, I’ll get it for you,” Mark said, stopping me from getting up from the couch. Shan was a nickname they used every now and again.

“Did you look up the spell?” I asked him when he came back.

“I didn’t have time, you scared the shit out of me. You were only out for like 45 seconds, but still,” He said as he took out his phone to search the spell.

“Are you sure you’re okay? I can take you to the hospital, if you want?” Nicki asked.

“Thanks, Nic, but I think I’ll be fine just have to let myself come dow—”

“It says here that the spell is one that Satanists used back in the day to conjure parasitic demons,” Mark interrupted. “What the fuck is a parasitic demon?” He asked to no one in particular.

“Can you please stop talking about it?” Nicki asked him with the utmost sincerity. I don’t think I had ever seen her look so scared and worried. She was not lying when she said she hated spooky stuff.

“Okay after this last thing. It says that parasitic demons possess their host and make them kill other living beings and then themselves as an offering to Satan,” He Informed. “How could anybody believe this shit?” He rolled his eyes and put his phone in his pocket.

“I don’t believe it, but it is very creepy,” I responded.

Suddenly, I felt my right eye starting to twitch. I excused myself to go to the bathroom to look in the mirror feeling slightly dizzy when I stood up. The way my apartment was set up the bathroom was located in my bedroom. On my way in I looked around for Mr. Drogo who I had not seen since my friends had arrived, he was probably under my bed. I looked into the mirror and noticed that there was a black speck on my eyeball. I blinked several times trying to see if it would move but to my surprise it gradually got bigger. Fear seeped into my chest as I watched the speck grow from the size of a pen mark to the size of a dime.

“You guys!” I screamed out to them. “Somethings wrong with my eye!”

They appeared in the doorway of the bathroom. They both shared similar looks of concern that immediately turned to surprise and fear when I turned to show them my eye.

“Oh my god, what the fuck is that?” Nicki whispered as she got closer. “It looks like its spreading.”

“Maybe you burst a blood vessel?” Mark tried to console.

“Blood is red Mark! This is fucking black!” I responded feeling myself becoming livid. Not at him just in general more than likely from the panic I was experiencing. I looked back in the mirror and noticed that most of the white of my eye was now black. It was even starting to spread onto the blue of my iris.

“Woah Shan, calm down girl, he’s just trying to help. I think we should go to the hospital now,” Nicki Said, “This looks serious.”

I watched my eye turn completely black and couldn’t help but cry. I sat down on the toilet seat and sobbed for a few minutes. They stood there like two concerned parents waiting for their child to get out of surgery.

“MEOW.” Mr. Drogo walked into the bathroom and brushed against my leg purring, also trying his best to reassure me that things would be okay.

KILL HIM.

“Did you guys hear that?” I looked up at them, startled.

“I know, his little purring is so cute,” Nicki responded with a fake smile trying to suppress her fear.

KILL HIM!

I looked at them just as confused as they looked at me. There is no way they didn’t hear that deep voice. Then it occurred to me that I was probably possessed. I didn’t believe in demons until the moment I heard that voice. My fear took over.

“I need to go to a church guys,” I said, “I’m hearing voices, and I think I may be possessed. What if the spell was real? Oh my god!” I let out another sob my body shaking from nervousness. I stood up and looked in the mirror again. My right eye was completely black now, and I saw another speck forming in my left eye.

“I think that’s a good idea,” Said Nicki, looking extremely uneasy her hands starting to shake as well. “I’ll get your shoes.”

Mark hadn’t said a word since I snapped at him, but his eyes said everything. Expressing fear and concern. I was shaking now profusely now. My fear turning to horror. The splotch on my left eye was now dime sized.

KILL HIM!!!

I let out a cry of fear. Not knowing what the hell was going on, my hand clutching my chest.

“Can we hurry up please?” I asked. “The voice is getting louder!” 

I looked down at Mr. Drogo who was looking up at me with his little blue eyes. I felt my face curl into a smile.

“Shannon, you’re smiling pretty hard, are you okay?” Mark asked.

“I will be once I please him,” I responded, but these were not my words. They came from somewhere else. I suddenly felt my consciousness shift as I became a bystander to the thing that began controlling my body. “He will be so pleased with my sacrifice,” I could hear the words leave my mouth, but I could not stop them. Mark’s eyes grew wide. 

“I found a church in the area that’s open this late, let’s go,” Nicki said appearing in the doorway.

“NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!” I felt the words come out. I tried with everything in me to fight this force, to get some of my own words out. I tried to move myself from my position in front of the mirror, but it was all in vain. It was very evident that I had no control. The most I could let out was a forced grunt.

“Girl fuck this, I’m calling the police!” Nicki Snapped out of fear.

Mark still stood silent, his face flushed and his eyes still wide. 

My body pushed past them and ran into the kitchen. I tried so hard to stop my it from moving. I could see, feel, and hear everything. I just had zero control. I fought so hard for control physically that it began to hurt all over. The pain was like fire, it felt like my blood was boiling, but I couldn’t even scream out in pain. In the kitchen I watched myself grab the largest knife from my drawer. I immediately knew where this was going, and used prayer as a last resort. I prayed hard in my head as my body walked back towards my bedroom where I heard Nicki talking to dispatch. As I prayed the physical pain intensified. 

GOD CAN’T SAVE YOU NOW!

“She’s got a knife!” Mark screamed.

They both cowered in the corner of my room. My body approached them slowly. I could still feel the grimace on my face, it stretched further making my face hurt. Nicki pulled out her key ring that had a bottle of mace on it.

“Shannon please, the police are on the way. I know you’re in there!” Nicki pleaded. I felt my eyes burn as tears ran down my face. I tried with all my might to get a word out. The burning inside me intensified but I still fought hard. It burned so bad that I finally was able to let out a scream. My tears intensified as I struggled to get the words out. My chest heaved as I stood there with my mouth open.

“I-I-I’m s-s-sorry,” I managed to get out before the pain forced me to give in and remain silent.

KILL THEM NOW!!

I approached them slowly. Nicki raised the mace and sprayed me, tears running down her face. I felt the burn of the mace, but it didn’t stop the demon controlling me. I lunged at her first wrapping my left hand around her throat. Mark grabbed my arm with the knife and tried to get it from my grip.

“Shannon please! You have to fight this!” Mark screamed after he failed to get the knife. Whatever was in control had inhuman strength so all of their efforts to fight back were futile. I felt my arm drive the knife into Nicki’s stomach, she didn’t make much noise because the hand around her throat was gripped tight. The most she managed was a few grunts, and then she began to gargle as blood spilled from her mouth.

“NOOOO!” Mark screamed, tears running down his face. He tried to make a run for it but before I knew it, I had him against a wall too, in the same way that I had Nicki.

“You think you can escape the wrath of my father?” I heard the question come from my lips, but this time it was the same voice I had heard in my head, powerful and deep. Mark whined as he tried to escape my grip. I heard Nicki gargle her last breath and momentarily forgot what was happening. I remembered all of the good times we shared. The love, the laughter, the tears, the secrets, Nicki. I felt my arm move and in an instant blood was flowing from his lips too. My grip on his neck released and he slid down the wall. He gurgled for about three minutes before he died, and the demon in control of my body made me stand right above him and watch until he took his last breath. I felt more tears coming from my eyes.

“MEOW.”

My head turned sharply, and my body ran full speed in his direction. He hissed and tried to run under the bed, but my hand gripped his tail before he could get away. I wanted so badly for him to get away, but in a matter of seconds I was holding him by the scruff of his neck. I really tried to close my eyes when the knife slit his throat, but all attempts were in vain. I felt his blood splatter on my face. My heart broke, it felt like it literally broke, and all I could do was silently cry. My chest began to heave. I was sobbing but I couldn’t Let it out. I watched as the demon used my body to lay my dead friends and dead cat on my bed.  I watched as it forced me to lie on the bed next to their cooling bodies.

“Father will be so proud,” The words left my mouth.

YOUR TURN NOW.

I watched myself pick up the knife and walk into the bathroom and stand in front of the mirror. I was covered in the red blood of my friends and cat. I then heard a knock on the door.

“This is the police. Please open the door!”

I saw my face clearly for the first time since my eyes had started to turn and I looked like a demon. My eyes, an abyss of darkness. My mouth, curled in a grimace that didn’t look humanly possible. I tried to pray in my head again, but nothing worked, this thing had me, and it wasn’t letting me go until it had what it wanted. I watched as the arm, my arm, that once seemed so familiar lifted the knife to my neck and slid the blade across my throat.

RED.

[doctormelapples]

I want every personal

Sorry this took so long

1: 6 of the songs you listen to most?

erm, idk but I can list some of my favs? how about “Mr. Know-It-All” by Young The Giant, “Brain Stew” by Green Day, “Swimming Pool” by The Front Bottoms, “Tokyo Narita (Freestyle)” by Halsey and Lido, “Big Jet Plane” by Angus & Julia Stone, and “Doo Wop (That Thing)” by Lauryn Hill

2: If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

Do they have to be alive?? How about Beyonce Twin #2

3: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.

I’m sitting right next to a bookshelf wtf. Okay the first book only had a line 12, Book 2: “…glittering sceptres. These shones so brightly September had to shade her..”

4: What do you think about most?

I see photo opprotunities when I walk? like if I’m walking past a house I see the exact angle that I would take a picture of it with and what the frame and coloring would turn out to be? does that count?

5: What does your latest text message from someone else say?

Text or sc?? cuz idk on either tbh sc:goals text:theenks

6: Do you sleep with or without clothes on?

Clothes

7: What’s your strangest talent?

I have none, so like,,

8: Girls… (finish the sentence); Boys… (finish the sentence)

Girls are beautiful, Boys are beautiful, and so is everyone else

9: Ever had a poem or song written about you?

lol no

10: When is the last time you played the air guitar?

like yesterday probs

11: Do you have any strange phobias?

Strange? idk

12: Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose?

When I was a child,,, marble

13: What’s your religion?

who’s that

14: If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?

being sad or taking pictures

15: Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

behind absolutely

16: Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?

jesus christ

17: What was the last lie you told?

I have a headache

18: Do you believe in karma?

sort of, like maybe not the textbook definition but I do think that you get what you give to some extent

19: What does your URL mean?

listen,,, okay Doctor is because i like doctor who and melapples is a dan and phil reference, okay, i made it when i joined tumblr, I was young and unknowing, okay

20: What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?

weakness: I’m too emotionally soft; strength: whom’st’d’ve

21: Who is your celebrity crush?

Does phil count, phil counts? It’s Phil

22: Have you ever gone skinny dipping?

almost

23: How do you vent your anger?

ahah, to the world and through tears tbh

24: Do you have a collection of anything?

I used to collect izze + snapple tops, then got bored

25: Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?

video chatting, I like seeing facial expressions

26: Are you happy with the person you’ve become?

whom?

27: What’s a sound you hate; sound you love?

It took me FOREVER to think of a sound I hate, and like i had sounds i love when my fingers hit the keys. sound I hate: Fork schreeching on a plate; sound I love: laughs, soft sounds of fingers on skin, leaves crunching as you wak in autumn, or snow in the winter, wind, papers fluttering

28: What’s your biggest “what if”?

What if I had stayed at my old school

29: Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

well not really, but aliens absolutely, like, there is no way the universe is so fucking big, and there isn’t life outside of earth

30: Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.

My window frame; a notebook

31: Smell the air. What do you smell?

somebody is making pasta downstairs

32: What’s the worst place you have ever been to?

what kind of worst? cuz like I believe that no matter where you go you can always get something out of it. Let’s go with my racist ass school

33: Choose: East Coast or West Coast?

EAST

34: Most attractive singer of your opposite gender?

idk harry styles?

35: To you, what is the meaning of life?

42?

how about: to know, be, see, and do what you want

36: Define Art.

Life

37: Do you believe in luck?

kinda like the same way I belive in karma

38: What’s the weather like right now?

It’s been rainy all day and we just had a rainbow. It’s cleared up now

39: What time is it?

1:23:09 AM

40: Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?

no

41: What was the last book you read?

A graphic novel called March about John Lewis

42: Do you like the smell of gasoline?

yeah actually

43: Do you have any nicknames?

lila bean

44: What was the last film you saw?

Wonder Woman pretty sure

45: What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?

all of the skin on my leg was scraped off once so

46: Have you ever caught a butterfly?

I’ve had a beautiful butterfly land on me during a meditation session once

47: Do you have any obsessions right now?

strawberry milkshakes

48: What’s your sexual orientation?

I’m pan bro

49: Ever had a rumour spread about you?

yes rip how fun

50: Do you believe in magic?

in my hopes and dreams

51: Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?

no, I’m really bad at holding longterm grudges but you better fucking run for at least two weeks if u piss me off

52: What is your astrological sign?

scoooorrrrrppppiiiiooooo

53: Do you save money or spend it?

i save money highkey short term and mass spend it

54: What’s the last thing you purchased?

A swimsuit. oh shit no wait strawberry syrup for milkshakes

55: Love or lust?

lust

56: In a relationship?

damn i wish

57: How many relationships have you had?

3

58: Can you touch your nose with your tongue?

nope

59: Where were you yesterday?

crying in bed all day tbh

60: Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?

my comforter that I’m sitting on lowkey has pink flowers on it

61: Are you wearing socks right now?

listen,,, fuck socks okay no

62: What’s your favourite animal?

cats homie

63: What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?

laugh at their jokes + be a pleasant person

64: Where is your best friend?

idk probably sleeping somewhere tbh

65: Give me your top 5 favourite blogs on Tumblr.

i don’t pay enough attention soz

66: What is your heritage?

like,,? My dad is from finland probably but otherwise i have no idea, all my family tree has is slavery so

67: What were you doing last night at 12AM?

fuck dude crying

68: What do you think is Satan’s last name?

smith

69: Be honest. Ever gotten yourself off?

hell yes

70: Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?

idk i hope so

71: You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?

i like can’t really swim that well so like probably get the attention of someone who can and get the dog saved then go to work. but fuck that job tho

72: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?

nah bro, i would try and accomplish everything i wanted, travel, be happy with family, and make friends happy, not afraid

73: You can only have one of these things; trust or love.

trust

74: What’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?

bills by lunchmoney lewis

75: What are the last four digits in your cell phone number?

or not?

76: In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?

trust, communication, known goals

77: How can I win your heart?

idk bro its pretty easy out here a-fucking-pparently

78: Can insanity bring on more creativity?

yeah for sure

79: What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?

Join theatre

80: What size shoes do you wear?

9.5 or 10

81: What would you want to be written on your tombstone?

rip in pieces

82: What is your favourite word?

antidisestablishmentarianism

83: Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart.

the image of the organ tbh

84: What is a saying you say a lot?

lit, tbh, rip, wild

85: What’s the last song you listened to?

star by brockhampton

86: Basic question; what’s your favourite colour/colours?

pink rn, it was just green, i fluctuate

87: What is your current desktop picture?

a picture i took of a car mirror in a violet sunset

88: If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?

trump probs but only if he is right next to pence that bitch will not be president

89: What would be a question you’d be afraid to tell the truth on?

why are you sad

90: One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren’t really doing anything, they’re just standing around your bed. What do you do?

FUCKING RUN DUDE CLIMB OUT THE FUCKING WINDOW FUCK THAT SHIT NO GET OUTTA MY FACE FUCK

91: You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?

elements my dude. if I had to pick which one it would be wind probs

92: You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?

The half-hour where I thought I fell in love with someone before they broke up w me a week later

93: You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

no

94: You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?

RIHANNA

95: You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

Prague 

96: Do you have any relatives in jail?

probably, but not that i know of

97: Have you ever thrown up in the car?

omg yes don’t remind me

98: Ever been on a plane?

yups a few times

99: If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say?

damn y y’all listening to me?

probs something like “jesus christ just shut up and listen to each other speak without jumping to fucking conclusions and preconceived notions of what other people are like kay?”

[exo-yeol]

Ask Game!

I was tagged by the beautiful @baekscrazylady cause she knows just how bored I truly am! Also! Fun fact! I was half way through this and my laptop crashed so that was fun!:))))))))))))))))))))

(1) Do You Sleep With Your Closet Doors Open Or Closed?

Closed! 

(2) Do You Have Freckles?

Nope! ...I do have one on each hand but I don’t think that counts! :P 

(3) Can You Whistle?

Yes! In and out! (oml that sounds so weird!)

(4) Last Song You Listened To.

Super Junior D&E - I Love It!

(5) What Is Your Favourite Colour?

PINK! I FREAKING LOVE PINK!

(6) Relationship Status.

Sexy, Free and Single! I’m ready to bingo! ;P ....jk bout the bingo part!

(7) What Is The Temperature Right Now?

18° C

(8) Did You Wake Up Cranky?

Yes! I was woken up at an ungodly hour by by little brother. Not. Fun.

(9) How Many Followers?

I have no clue! I never think of checking that for tumblr! But really not that many! 

(10) Zodiac Sign.

Scorpio!

(11) What Is Your Eye Colour?

Blue!

(12) Take A Vitamin Daily?

Oh god, too many! 

(13) Do You Sing In The Shower?

YES! What is that point in showering if you don’t make use of the amazing acoustics?? 

(14) What Books Are You Reading?

Uhhmm again, too many! The most recent one I read some of was Carrie Hope Fletcher’s The Other Side

(15) Grab The Book Nearest To You, Turn To Page 64, Give Me Line 14.

You Can Heal Your Life - Louise L. Hay “you are developing insight and understanding that will set you free.”

(16) Favourite Anime?

FULLMETAL ALCHEMIST!! Brotherhood or the original anime idagf! They are both SO GOOD! And the characters are my everything! I would die for them! Can I marry Ed? Can I marry Mustang? Can I be best friends with Winry?? Can I do alchemy pls? And the storyline is so interesting and complex and the characters are really well rounded and the back stories oomf I fucking love it soooo much! I’m gonna copy @baekscrazylady and put in a gif here because I miss looking at their faces! 

AAAAH! How fucking COOL is Ed? I love them so much!

(17) Last Person You Cried In Front Of?

Does myself count? Yesterday I cried in front of the mirror! But if it has to be another person then my mother! 

(18) Do You Collect Anything?

Teddies, Tamagotchis, Kpop albums/merch, books, EMOTIONAL WOUNDS! 

(19) What Did You Have For Lunch?

Chicken Caesar Salad Wrap!

(20) Do You Dance In The Car?

Uhm I guess? Its not something I get a chance to do often but if the opportunity presents itself then sure! But also I hate being a distraction to the driver so like keep it on the minimum peeps!

(21) Favourite Animal?

WOLVES AND FOXES AND CANINES IN GENERAL! My room and house in general is covered in some variation of canine! Including two living ones (soon to be three!) 

(22) Do You Watch The Olympics?

Yas! Track, Badminton, Trampolining and Diving are my faves!

(23) What Time Do You Usually Go To Bed?

Lately somewhere between 11 and 12! 

(24) Are You Wearing Makeup Right Now?

Yes! I’m wearing bright pink eyeshadow and bright pink lipstick!

(25) Do You Prefer To Swim In A Pool Or The Ocean?

I don’t really have a preference cause I can’t really swim, but I like to mess around and play in both! 

(26) Favourite Tumblr Blog?

@baekscrazylady is always a winner for all your multifandom needs! Plus shes my bestie! But thats just a bonus :P 

(27) Bottled Water Or Tap Water?

Bottled tastes nicer but I have no problems drinking from the tap! 

(28) What Makes You Happy?

I’m not sure any more! :/

(29) Post A Gif Of What You’re Currently Feeling Right Now.

I’m sleepy! I think I’m gonna finish this in the morning! 

...

Okay! I’m back after 7 hours of sleep! 

(30) Do You Study Better With Or Without Music?

Without!

(31) Dogs Or Cats?

Dogs! I’m not too fond of cats and I think my dogs would have a problem if I brought one home!

(32) If You Were A Crayon What Colour Would You Be?

PINK!

(33) PlayStation Or Xbox.

PlayStation! I’ve spent a lifetime playing Crash Bandicoot on the PS1 and my loyalties run deep!

(34) Would You Swim In The Lake Or Ocean?

The Ocean! I just feel like theres bound to be monsters in a lake!

(35) Do You Believe In Magic?

Of course! <3

(36) What Colour Shirt Are You Wearing?

Yellow! But last night when I started this I was wearing a green vest!

(37) Can You Curl Your Tongue?

I surely can!

(38) Do You Save Money Or Spend It?

Both!

(39) Is There Anything Pink Within 10 Feet Of You?

Plenty! Teddies, books, a suitcase, kpop albums, my bedsheet is pink!

(40) Do You Have Any Obsessions Right Now?

Well K-pop is an ongoing obsession! But recently something specific I’ve been OBSESSED with is Seungri’s 123! THIS IS THE BEST SONG! I have to listen to it everyday or I can’t function! Its soooo good! And the MV is really fun and theres cute lil bloopers at the end! I love it!! 

Hehe! Look at him go!! 

(41) Have You Ever Caught A Butterfly?

Yes! My brother actually attracts them! They land on him all the time! Its kinda cute kinda freaky!

(42) Are You Easily Influenced By Other People?

I think it depends on the person and the thing I’m being influenced about, but I’m quite a stubborn/headstrong person so I would say that I lean more towards no...but still a lil bit yes!

(43) Do You Have Strange Dreams?

Uhm yes, a lot! 

(44) Do You Like Going On Airplanes?

I’m not scared of flying and I don’t mind it, but its not my favourite thing!

(45) Name One Movie That Made You Cry.

The Green Mile, this movie broke me and now I actually cannot watch sad movies...also two days ago I cried at The Breakup so woo go me for being a mess!

(46) Peanuts Or Sunflower Seeds?

Sunflower seeds! I could eat a whole bag!

(47) If I Handed You A Concert Ticket Right Now, Who Would You Want The Performer To Be?

EXO! In all their OT9 glory!!! I need this to happen so that I can die happy! ...I would say BTS as well since they’re my ults too but I ALREADY HAVE TICKETS TO SEE THEM!!!! AAAAAAHHHH!!!! MY ARMY HEART IS DYING! 

(48) Are You A Picky Eater?

Not really! I have a list of stuff I don’t eat but I’ll eat it if its put in front of me cause I have to set a good example for my little brothers!

(49) Are You A Heavy Sleeper?

I sleep like a corpse.

(50) Do You Fear Thunder / Lightning?

Nope! I love it! My whole family are those freaks who’ll stupidly run to the window or outside and be like “waaaahhh!”

(51) Do You Like To Read / Write?

Yes! I do both everyday! 

(52) Do You Like Your Music Loud?

I’M SORRY, I CAN’T HEAR YOU!! MY MUSIC IS TOO LOUD!!

(53) Would You Rather Carve Pumpkins Or Wrap Presents?

Wrap presents! Bitch I’m a PRO! 

(54) Put Your Music On Shuffle, What Is The First Song That Came Up?

Hyuna - Run & Run (MY QUEEN!)

(55) What Season Are You In Right Now? (Weather)

Autumn months wise, but we’re still getting Summer weather!

(56) What Are You Craving Right Now?

More sleep!

(57) Post A Screenshot Of Your Tumblr Feed.

Nah...not arsed, but the post I last saw was a gifset of Mark and JB being stoopid!

(58) What Is Your Gender?

Female

(59) Coffee Or Tea?

Tea! 

(60) Do You Have Any Homework Right Now? If So, What Is It About?

No! Its the Summer holidays! 

(61) What Is Your Sexuality?

Mainly straight, but aren’t we all a little gay? I’m about 70/30! Or maybe even 60/40!

(62) Do You Make Your Bed In The Morning?

Most days, but my bed is really annoying to make and takes a good ten mins so sometimes I don’t do it till like 5 o’clock in the day when I want to sit on it!

(63) Favourite Pokemon?

Eevee! Ninetails! All water Pokemon! Pikachu! Togapee! 

(64) Favourite Social Media?

I don’t know! I get bored of them quickly and hop around! RN I’d say instagram maybe?

(65) What’s Your Opinion On Instagram Stories?

I love watching them!

(66) Do You Get Homesick?

Yep! I think everyone does a little or at times! But I’ve never been like actual homesick where you get sick and everything!

(67) What Shampoo And Conditioner Are You Using Right Now?

Tea-tree shampoo and a conditioner thats specifically for curly hair but I can’t remember the name! 

(68) If You Were Far From Home And Needed To Sleep For The Night, Would You Choose To Rent A Crappy Motel Room For $60 Or Sleep In Your Car For Free?

Motel! I know that they’re haunted and I’m gonna be stabbed in the shower but listen, I am not sleeping in a fricking car, ESPECIALLY not on my own!!

(69) Are Both Of Your Blood Parents Still In Your Life?

Yes, unfortunately! ,,,jk about the unfortunately...or am I? :P 

(70)  Whats The Next Movie You Want To See In Theaters?

I’m going to see the Teen Titans Movie! CAN’T WAIT!! I watched the show all the time when I was a kid! Also I really want to see Wreck-It Ralph 2 and so many others!

(71) What Is Your Favourite Quote Right Now?

I don’t have a favourite quote atm! Sorry!

(72) What Eye Colour Do You Find Sexiest?

People? Find? Specific? Eye? Colours? Sexy?

(73) Did You Like Swinging As A Child? Do You Still Get Excited When You See A Swing Set?

YEs and YEs! I would be that kid swinging far too high and then jumping off! Me and my friend used to challenge each other to do specific poses and stuff while we were jumping off or when we’d land!

(74) What Was The Last Thing You Ate?

A chicken goujon!

(75) What Games Do You Have On Your Phone?

I have one rhythm game, and a few language games!  

(76) Would You Give A Homeless Person CPR If They Were Dying? Why Or Why Not?

I don’t think so because I’m not that confident in my CPR giving skills so I’d probably ask someone else to help! But if worst comes to worst then I probably would!

(77) Been On The Computer For 5 Hours Straight?

Today? No! In my life? Yes!

(78) Stalked Someone On A Social Network?

All the time!

(79) Do You Like Meeting New People?

Yes! 

(80) Do You Wear Rings? If You Do, Take A Picture Of Them.

Every now and then! But I just woke up so I haven’t put any on today!

(81) Do You Sleep With Your Bedroom Door Open Or Closed?

Closed! But if I’m sharing with my brothers then I can sleep with them open! 

(82) What Are Three Things You Did Today?

I peed, I reset my password on a website and I’ve listened to Seungri’s 123!

(83) What Do You Wear To Bed?

Big tshirts or night dresses! And in the Winter I wear matching pjs!

(84) List All Of Your Different Beauty Products You Have Right Now.

Like including makeup? Or just skincare? I use too much makeup to list! And for skincare everything I use has some sort of coconut oil in it!

(85) Are You A Day Or Night Person?

Both!

(86) List All Of Your Video Games On Your Phone, Console Etc.

Nah!

(87) Tell Me About A Dream That You Had And When It Happened.

Hmmmmmmmmm which to choose! I recently had a dream about 2 weeks ago where I was in a bar and Chanyeol and Sehun were having a dance off while I was singing karaoke and I kept getting angry at them for distracting me! And Seungcheol, who was my boyfriend in this particular dream universe, was chasing his manager around with a pair of false eyelashes trying to put them on him!  

(88) Favourite Soda Drink?

Mainstream: Nothing better than an ice cold coke! Don’t @ me! 

Hippie dippy: Elderflower!

(89) What Sounds Are Your Favourite?

Rain, my Gran calling my name, chuckling, little children/babies laughing, my Grandpa singing, Chanyeol singing, waves ( i always fall asleep to waves!), idk so many others its too early and my brain is mush rn!

(90) Do You Wear Jeans Or Sweats

I wear both quite equally!

(91) How Do You Look Right Now?

I just woke up and I have mascara under my eyes, honestly I think I still look asleep!

(92) Name Something That Relaxes You.

Washing my face! I feel so calm and pampered! Its the simple things :P

(93) What Tattoo Do You Want?

TOO MANY!!! I want a Golden Snitch, and a fairy and a flower and so many! I can’t wait to start getting tattooed!

(94) Favourite YouTuber?

Rn Shane Dawson is my number one, but I do love Jenna Marbles, Dan and Phil, Safiya Nygaard, Grav3yardgirl, Jamie Jo and then a hand full of beauty gurus that I semi-keep up with!

(95) Do you smoke?

No. Its really gross and reminds me of my Dad. No thank you.

(96) How tall are you?

5′ 2″!! Or maybe 5′ 3″! I’m 160cm! 

(97) What career did you want as a child

A singer! I still lowkey do! But thats a very squashed dream at this point! I also wanted to be an actress! Honestly I just wanted to make people happy and entertain them! And when I was a child I was always the center of attention because my mam had me when she was waaay young and no one else her age had a child so I guess from an early age I’ve just loved watching people laugh or be happy because of me! Thats probably why I’m attracted to film and have a YouTube channel cause I want people to have fun while enjoying the things that I create or am a part of! I hope this doesn’t sound conceited oml! 

(98) Do you care about your weight?

Yes! But I don’t know what I weigh tho cause my mam doesn’t believe in weighing scales, and shes right! But I am conscious of my weight! ...most times I’m self conscious of it lol! 

(99) Ever kissed a stranger?

Yes! Many a time! 

(100) Favorite season?

I don’t think I have a favourite season! Now that I’m older I can appreciate each season as it comes and I have certain things that I love about each! Rn I can’t wait to start wearing cute sweaters and boots again, but at the end of Spring I was dying for shorts and vests! 

Woo! I’m finished! Now I’m going back to sleep for a quick nap! And then off to the cinema! YAY! 

[classic-rock-roller]

1. In your town, there is a homeless man everyone has nicknamed the Library Hobo since that’s where he sleeps in the winter time. One day in summer, you’re at a gas station, and you see the Library Hobo pushing his bicycle by. Kevin jumps out of the car and runs into the convenience store. When he comes out, he’s holding 2 water bottles. He hurriedly hands you one and says, “I’ll be right back, I’m going to go give him one.” and motions toward the Library Hobo. He runs off before you can respond. How does the Library Hobo respond, and what does Kevin say when he gets back?

When Kevin gives him the bottle he seems surprised and seems to say ‘are you sure?’ before Kevin shakes his head yes. When Kevin comes back I’d go, “Aww, you’re really sweet.” And kiss him. “It’s hot. I didn’t want him to get dehydrated.” 

2. Kevin has never been a very religious person, and neither have you. One day you come home and he is on his knees in the living room, saying a prayer that you two will have a lasting relationship. He doesn’t know you’re home yet. What do you do?

I wouldn’t want to interrupt him but when he’s finished he’d realize I was standing there and go, “H-How long have you been standing there?” “Long enough to know that with work, we will have a lasting relationship.” 

3. You’re flying out to California with Kevin to visit his parents. As the plane passes over your hometown, Kevin gets up and goes to the front of the plane, and the flight attendant gets on the intercom and says, “Howdy folks! If you look out your windows out either side, you’ll see Allentown. That’s where one of our passengers, @classic-rock-roller was born, and I have up here with me a Mr.Kevin DuBrow, and he’s got something to ask her.” She passes him the microphone, and he asks you to marry him. What do you do?

“Of course I’ll marry you!” I’d run up to the front of the plane and kiss him and the whole plane would most likely be cheering as he put the ring on my finger. 

4. You’re visiting Italy with Crue, and you’re walking around Saint Mark’s Square. Tommy is buying something from a street vendor, and as the vendor hands Tommy his coins, a surprisingly agile beggar woman jumps up, snatches the coins, and runs away. How does everyone respond?

Tommy is kind of just standing there surprised. Nikki and Vince go, “What was that?” Mick knew this was going to happen because he’d been in Italy before and I just go, “Damn, she’s fast.” 

5. You’re on the bus with QR and Kevin is being especially annoying. After a minute, Drew says angrily, “God, do you ever shut up?” and Randy deadpans, “Magic 8 ball says probably not.” How do you respond?

I’d look over to Drew and go, “Do you want me to shut him up?” Drew would go, “Yes, anything to get him to stop.” I’d start a full-on makeout session with Kevin and Drew would go, “Ok, anything but that! Anything but that!” We’d ignore him anyway and Randy would look over at Drew and say, “You just had to bring it up didn’t you?”   

6. You’re on a dock overlooking the ocean. The dock is on a bit of a hill, and there’s about a 20 foot drop to the water. You and Mick are enjoying the beauty, Vince is trying to get a nice photo of the water, and Nikki and Tommy are chasing each other. After a minute, you hear Nikki shout, “No don’t–YOU FUCKER!” Tommy pushed him over the railing and he fell into the water. How do you all respond?

Vince is cackling like an idiot, so is Tommy for that matter. Mick is just kind of shaking his head while trying to hold in laughter and I’m screaming at Tommy for acting like a child and because Nikki could have gotten seriously hurt. 

7. Kevin decided he wanted to learn to play the clarinet, and he’s having a lesson one day. You’re sitting in on it, since the teacher didn’t mind. Kevin’s got the reed in his mouth, and the teacher does too, and he sees her flip her reed over without using her hands. Naturally, he sees this as a challenge, and tries to do the same thing. He tips his head back, and the reed falls dangerously far back in his mouth. He spits it out in a panic and says, “That’s it, this is a devil’s instrument, I don’t want to play it.” The teacher looks angry at him but doesn’t say anything. How do you respond?

“Just try it again. This is literally your first lesson. And maybe this time don’t try to one-up the teacher who’s been playing for twenty years.” 

8. You’re out with Kevin one day on a tour of the city. It’s raining, so you’re sharing an umbrella. He absentmindedly goes to put some change in your back pocket and ends up kind of just grabbing your bottom. You give him a look, and he chuckles. “What?” “That was a smart idea, putting your pants on inside out. That way no one can steal the stuff in your pockets.” You look down, thinking him crazy, and sure enough, you’ve got your pants on inside out. What do you do?

“Oh, fuck. I didn’t realize I put them on inside out.” Kevin literally stops, “How do you not realize?” “Well, after last night...and you rushing me this morning I literally just threw on the closest pants in the dark. So I guess I’ll be wearing them inside out the rest of the day.” 

9. You’re hanging out with QR and the 4 of them are sharing instrumental stereotype jokes (what’s the difference between a saxophone and a lawnmower? You can tune a lawnmower. That type of stuff). Randy hurt Kevin’s feelings with one of his jokes, so Kevin says, “Hey, Randy, how do you get a guitarist out of a tree? Cut the rope.” Randy is outraged, and Rudy and Drew know he’s gone too far. What do you do?

“Kevin,” I say his name dangerously low which usually means I’m really pissed off and that’s when he kind of realizes he went too far. “Oh god, I...I wasn’t thinking. I’m so sorry. I know I shouldn’t say that. Especially with what happened to your friend. Randy, I’m really, really sorry.” Randy is still pissed but forgives him and I go, “You need to learn to think before you speak sometimes.”  

10. You’re at home and are playing a record while Kevin is at work. You’ve got Van Halen playing, and they are QR’s notorious rivals (true story). After about half an hour, your door swings open violently and Kevin shouts “IS THAT VAN HALEN I HEAR?” How do you respond?

“Of fucking course, it’s Van Halen. They’re amazing.” He’d pout and go, “But my girlfriend can’t listen to our sworn enemy.” “I can listen to whoever I want to listen to and besides. When your guitarist looks that good you’re going to get girls listening to you.” Kevin would stride over and go, “You take that back.” I’d look up at him, “Make me.”  

11. You’re painting your house with QR. You’ve got the radio going, and a Jefferson Airplane song comes on. Rudy shouts out, “Hey who is this? They’re pretty good.” You shout, “Jefferson Airplane!” “What?” You’re about to shout again when Kevin shouts, “She said it’s Deaf Person Airplane!” He’s dead serious. He thinks that’s what you said. How does Rudy respond and what do you do?

“Who names their band Deaf Person Airplane?” “No, Jeff-er-son Airplane. Not Deaf Person Airplane.” They’d both look at me and go, “Ohhhh.”  

--------------------

1) You and Randy were supposed to be going on a dinner date, that you’ve been planning for two months. When he pops his head into the room and asks, “Hey, where’s my guitar?” You look over at him. “Why do you need it?” “Kevin wants to do an emergency practice before our gig this weekend.” How do you respond? 

2) You and Kevin have played a joke on Randy and after he’s yelled at Kevin, he comes to yell at you but you kiss him on the nose and give him a smile. He smiles back and says, “I can’t stay mad at you when you’re so cute.” Kevin, who is doubled over in pain from where Randy hit him in the gut, goes, “Seriously?” How do you and Randy respond?

3) You had cooked dinner for you and Randy and had set up candles because it was your anniversary. He had practice that day but had promised you he’d be back in time. Your waiting for him with dinner all laid out and it slowly goes from him being ten minutes late to almost two hours. You sigh and put your empty plate in the dishwasher before going to bed. When he does get home it’s super late and he finds his dinner on the table with your card that read “Happy Anniversary,” He looks at it before saying, “Aw, shit.” What does he do? 

4) You get home from a long day of work to see that your roommate, Stephen, has put a scrunchie on the door handle. Once you get closer to the door, you can hear noises coming from right behind it. You’re pissed because you and Stephen have a ‘No thingamying in the living room rule’ and he’s just broken it. What do you do? 

5) You and Randy are walking through New York City. One of the hawkers is trying to sell you a bus tour. You don’t look at him and tell him no, just before you and Randy are out of earshot, Randy hears the hawker go, “Bitch.” How does Randy respond?

6) You and Crue are at the beach. At the hotel you’re staying in, it butts right up against the bay and there’s a long dock going out to deeper water. You’re at the end of the dock when you hear running footsteps behind you. You think nothing of it until the person running picks you up and jumps into the water with you. Once you come up out of the water, you look to see who jumped in the water with you. It was Tommy. How do you react? 

7) You and your boyfriend, Warren, are looking through colleges to see where you want to go. All of a sudden, he shoves a pamphlet in your face, “You should go here.” You look down at it and read, “Warren University?” “Yeah, then I’ll always be near you,” he says with this cheeky grin. How do you respond? 

8) Your roommate Stephen has been hit by a car and broken both his legs (for the second time). He was put into a medically induced coma so that they could operate on him. He’s been in this coma for almost two weeks and the doctors fear that he may not wake up. You’ve come and visited him every day and just talk to him or read him something from one of his favorite books. One day you're holding his hand while talking to him and you feel him tighten his hand around your own. What do you do? 

9) You’re driving Kevin and a friend from your hometown who’s come to visit. Your friend doesn’t know that you’re dating the guitarist of QR and hang out with the boys. He doesn’t even know Kevin is the singer. You’re driving down the highway when a new QR song comes on the radio. Both you and Kevin whoop and you turn it up. Your friend goes, “Not this shit. The whole band is horrible. Especially the singer. I don’t even know how they got signed.” How do you and Kevin react?

10) You live with Crue and you come out of the shower one day to find that your clothes are missing. You shove on a towel and go out to the living room to scream at Tommy, Nikki, and Vince. They all look at you dumbstruck. When you ask them if they took your clothes they all go, “No we just got back from the movies.” You hear chuckling and turn around to see Mick holding your clothes. (Apparently, Tommy and Nikki have rubbed off a bit.) What do you do? 

11) You’re walking back to your dorm room and are crossing the street when you hear “watch out!” You jump back and are barely missed by a motorcycle. “Hey asshole, watch it!” you scream at the biker. He takes off his helmet and you realize it’s Nikki from your chem class. He looks you up and down and goes, “How am I supposed to watch it when you’re the one distracting me?” How do you respond? 

@osbournebemydaddy , your move, love                       

[elmerinolatino-blog]

Guatemalita, Mexixi

Guatemala, and leaving Mexico once again

Last time I wrote about my problems of leaving Mexico City. This time I will describe why I went back to Mexico City once again...

..gotcha. It was just for a connecting flight to Bogotá, Colombia ;). I did not really go back for a third time.

I spent most of the past 2 weeks in Guatemala, with a splash of seaside Jersey Shore realness... in Cancún's 'alternative sister city' (stop lying Lonely Planet, there is nothing alternative about Playa del Carmen...).

Last time I also wrote about Lago Atitlán, the place that makes westerners hardcore hippies and sucks them up in a tornado of yoga, retreats and ceremonies. Did I get trapped by the lake? No, this time I did not.

Guatemala, on the chicken bus

From San Cristobal, I got a bus to the border. From the border of Guatemala, I got on the... chicken bus. This is the way the Guatemalan buses are known, although I have never seen a chicken on them. I guess that wouldn't be a problem though. It´s the way Guatemalans transport their bulk goods.

Chicken buses are the drag queens of the buses, just see for yourself (scroll down). They are painted in pimp-my-ride-like patterns, and basically look like a riding disco at night. The plate with the direction, above the windshield, is lit up with blacklight, and there are lights of every colour around the windshield. To make the disco experience complete, they play loud reggaeton or latino songs which sound happy but have deeply melancholic texts. Or reli-rock, which Guatemala is big on.

Every chicken bus has a driver, a guy who charges the passengers, and a baggage guy, who puts larger baggage on top of the bus. This happens as the bus is driving off, and after a minute or so, the baggage guy climbs back into the bus via a ladder at the front or back. My first chicken bus ride felt like quite the experience. As we stopped somewhere, and I had no idea about the chicken bus logistics, the baggage guy threw down some sacks of clothes. I was a bit distracted, and then got woken up from my daydream by his arm handing down some money. Right after that, we started driving again. What the fuck, I thought, this dude is still on the bus!! Is this normal? Well yes, gringo Elmer, this was everyday business. The payment guy looked like a young Ricky Martin, by the way.

A drive I thought would have been an hour or two (150km) took six hours. Guatemalans like to live along the road, it seems, the whole zone from the border to my first destination was built-up... nevertheless, it was a beautiful ride. We drove through semi-jungle, high green hills with banana trees, palm trees, trees with bright flowers... the setting sun cast some weird glow over the smokey valley we drove through... I was getting excited and ready for adventure. And adventure I got.

Xela, and hiking to Lago Atitlán

As I arrived in Xela, it was 22:00. The streets were deserted. The streets were also full of trash. I asked how far it would be walking to the center, and the bus driver seemed surprised by my question. He said it was far and that it wasn't safe, I would get robbed. The hotels next to the bus station were expensive, taxis too... argh. Fallen into a tourist trap... I thought.

But I found another guy who went back to his hostel and we shared a taxi. All good. Later however, I went out for a midnight snack and the streets (in the center and we are talking a 200.000 people city here) were ab so lute ly empty with regard to people, although full of trash and street dogs. Because I wanted to avoid walking past a gang of street dogs I took another way than I arrived and ended up getting lost on the way back. Woopsie... After half an hour of searching I found my hostel, however. Again, all good.

In Xela, I did two hikes. One to a natural sauna (there is a lot of volcanic activity around the city...) and one time to a crater lake (amazingly beautiful). I got the taste of it and decided I would go on a 2.5 day hike from the city to Lago Atitlán. Awesome! I really discovered a new passion, when we arrived I wished it would have taken a day or three more. The next three days I spent at the lake, relaxing. The lake was described by Aldous Huxley (author of Brave New World) as the most beautiful lake in the world. Yeah, before the explosive growth of villages around it, I guess. I was not suuuper impressed. The village I stayed in (not the hippie village) was medium beautiful, the houses were just quickly built without many beautiful details or finishing touches. Mainly just a collection of concrete floors on concrete floors on concrete floors. I did get a penthouse with a spectacular view for a ridiculously low price, so I decided to stay a bit. Later, I heard that the hippie village, on the other lakeside, has a view on the volcano Fuego, and that sometimes at night lava streams are visible. Wah, guess I should have stayed there... but on the other hand, I found my hippie village hippie enough though. Example? I went to ask for a pen in my hotel one afternoon and ended up getting my Mayan astrology sign read... :). Also, I love in the underneath photo that you can do meditations to be useful on earth.

Antigua, the return of Fuego

After 4 days I was done at the lake. I was in a -supposedly- party town, but a party town in Guatemala is a town with bars that stay open until 01:00AM. After that, by law, all bars need to close. Clubs too. You might understand, as a new Berliner, this gave me a triple heart attack and I felt deeply insulted. I had to leave. I went to Antigua, which is.... surprise.... an old city. A beautiful one as well, because it made me feel like taking my book out at every square, and to fall in love. There was plenty of that happening though, it was Valentine´s day and every bench was occupied by some in-love couple eating eachothers faces.

My cheap-ass hostel turned out to be the hang-out spot for the youth from that city. At night I was having a beer in the bar and suddenly I found myself talking to a young girl who told me that she was actually 14. I was shocked until I remembered that I was also drinking in parks at 14, so I really had no right to be shocked. Anyway. The next two days I reserved for a hike up the neighbour of.... Fuego! The active volcano. There´s an old, inactive volcano next to Fuego which is 4000m high. The first day we (tour) descended up to 3500m, and I made friends with Dutch sorority girls (corpschicks; keep your friends close, enemies closer... nah kidding they were kind of cool. I mean, they were hiking up to 3500m to see a volcano erupt, which is obviously something only cool kids do)... ANYWAY (omg I´m really getting lost in the details this time), we got up to 3500m and the last bit was quite tough. Remember this was an old volcano, so its sides were full of porous stone and very fine volcanic sand. We got to the ´base camp´(how fucking cool does that sound) and BOOM! Fuego erupts. It did not actually make a sound, but we were able to see plumes of smoke coming out of the top. Magical. This went on, about every hour. The sun set, left red-pink-purple-blue skies, Guatemala city started lighting up, far away, the stars came out, and I was left speechless, and wondering whether I actually took LSD or if it was all just real... It was... surreal, unbelievable. No description does that feeling and view justice.

At 04:00 AM we woke up to go up the top (4000m) and see the sunrise. I swear I slept two hours maximum because my balls froze off during the night and on the way to the top, even more so. The top was almost like a sand dune of volcanic sand, it was extremely difficult to walk on and I also really noticed for the first time that there is a lot less oxygen on high altitudes. My god. When we got to the top, the wind was also insane... and it was minus 5 degrees Celsius. My water bottle was starting to freeze, but it was sooooo worth it! It was like being on the moon. Clouds hung far beneath us, the valley was still lit up with tiny lights, the sky went from red-pink-purple-blue to pink-purple-blue, to purple-blue, to the most beautiful blue I have probably ever seen. Whoah. Of course this Fuego bitch did not erupt while we were on the top, but as soon as we got to the basecamp again (running off the mountain, it was like a sand dune anyway)... another eruption. I can really only think of words like woah and magical while writing this. Oh yeah of course when I was down in Antigua again I saw an eruption that was 10 times bigger than the ones I saw. So mean, Fuego.

Flores, a day through Belize and the Jersey Shore

The rest of my trip before Colombia was a bit less magical, just so-so. I decided to make my way to Flores, a supposedly cute island-in-lake-town, with some Mayan ruins in the forest close by. However, upon arrival (after an overpriced nightbus) I found out it really was just a bit of a tourist trap. I was annoyed by seeing the prices to do a tour (let me just do that shit by myself) and even more annoyed that the only way to get there was... by tour. I decided, nah, I have seen pretty impressive temples already and what I really just want is to see some ruins in a jungle setting. So I went to another ruin complex nearby, that was reachable with a minivan (honouring its name, it was so mini that I needed to sit diagonally in it for my legs to fit). I paid for that visit with mosquito bites, but it was worth it. I really could notice from the kids staring at me on the way that I went “off the beaten path” and half the village did not even know where the ruins were when I asked. There is a weird sense of charm in having to ask 40 times how to get somewhere. I got there and the ruins were... very overgrown. I suddenly realised how a jungle can swallow a city, there wasn´t much to see... just hills that supposedly have been houses and two pyramids (quite clearly visible though!). However, I got what I wanted, I ticked my jungle ruins experience off. In the evening I made a tour around the island town (5 minutes), found tourist shop after middle-aged American tourist after tourist-shop after old American tourist on a group travel (indicator of being in a tourist trap). Luckily, I also found a place with mojitos for a euro, to drink the frustration away. 

The next day I went for... Playa del Carmen, next to Can(oh my god)cún. Yes, Cancún. Famous for stealing the dignity of American students during their spring break. To get there, we had to go through Belize, which is such a weird country. It used to be a British colony, the main language is English, and there just seems to be nothing there except for huge ranches. It looks like a huge swamp, with some Louisiana style colonial houses, and their currency is the Belize dollar. It is basically the wet dream of every Brexit voter. All the hours I spent looking out the window looking for a sign of identity of that country, and there was just.. none. It seemed like the most empty place on earth, or the perfect refuge of every person who has colonial dreams and an empty soul.

I can only think of the pure irony that I chose to spend my three last days before my flight in ´Cancun´s alternative (soul) sister´ Playa del Carmen. That´s like saying a glass full of rum with a single drop of coca cola zero is a healthy alternative to a glass full of rum with a single drop of regular cola. Or like saying George Bush is a healthy alternative to Donald Trump. Or like saying that pizza is a vegetable because of the amount of tomato on it. The point is, there is no ´little bit over the top´, this might have been a toned down version of a hyper Las Vegas on the beach, but it is still a Las Vegas on the beach. And so there I was, cool alternative traveller, complaining about tourist traps, spending my days in the definition of a tourist trap. My first night I was walking to find my hostel, when I suddenly found what looked like a gay club. I had to charge my phone anyway so I decided to go in. The body guards told me that there was some shows going on, and I thought of course that meant drag shows. My gay heart made a little jump and for a second I thought I found the one place in this godforsaken hellhole where I could see a bit of a cool rough-edge underground kinda scene. Aaaaaaand then no, it was just a gay strip club. In a matter of 2 minutes, three of the guys came towards me to introduce themselves and to ask whether I would buy them an overpriced beer. I said thanks but no, I´m trying to watch my expenses, after which they of course left looking super insulted. One was a little bit more aggressive though, he proposed we go to a private room and when I said naah thanks he (before I knew it) rubbed his dick a bit and put his fingers under my nose (umm wtf, I don´t know whose definition of sexy that would be... dude, gross). I decided to get another beer and watch the place as an anthropological experience, now that I paid anyway. It was... interesting. Next to me there was a mum (I think) with daughter, son+girlfriend. Son+girlfriend were making out aggressively all the time, mum bought daughter a lapdance. There was also a gay couple where the one guy decided he would just save money and give his boyfriend a lapdance the whole night. And then, finally, my favourite. A woman who (with a look full of horny drunk pleasure) would signal the guys to come over, lick her lips to seduce them, then make an instant grab for the guy´s dicks as they were within charging distance. It was an experience.

Luckily the next day, I was reunited for a day with my dear long lost friend Marina (plus her partner in crime Katrin), who know how to party, so we shook our booties to reggaeton that night in a trashy club where ´ladies get a free drink´ (sexist assholes). At some point the stripper with the finger under my nose move came in... and he seemed to be busy with the local rose-seller for a while. So I really thought this was the start of a very unusual romance... but then it turned out he wasn´t actually buying me anything (bitch), and I just focused on dancing, laughing about the bathroom lady offering everyone coke, and the hen party girls who came out of the bathroom bit by bit making signs with fingers and noses to eachother. The bride had a shirt with ´Feyoncé on it. 

The other two days I just decided to make most of the place, go to the beach and spend as little time as possible in my hostel, which was fucking nasty (reminding me of a particular flatshare in Berlin I used to live in) and full of Jersey Shore kind of people (omg I forgot these people existed). In this city, an instant inspiration-killer, I had to do something to not go crazy. Luckily my hostel rented shitty beach cruiser bikes so I drove around quite a bit and was able to really judge the place fully (as you notice, I like judging things). Turns out, it wasn´t thaaaat bad. Some resorts had hired good architects and actually looked really nice. There was a lot of street art everywhere... and in some parts you could still see remains of the jungle that used to be there before people decided that it would be a cool idea to bulldoze 300km of shoreline jungle and make it one big Disneyland on crack. So all the 3 days I was there, I was feeling some weird sense of disgust and being intrigued at the same time.

And what was also quite cool, because it was Mexico again, I was in the land of the ´platica´, ie the land where chatting is an art. I had little talks with a bunch of people. One lady (I still have her business card) told me about her husband, who was a lucha libre fighter (the best one, of course). She herself was a massage therapist, so they must have been the perfect couple. And I ran into the police officer who showed me the way the night of my strip club experience. I had an incredibly boring day that day (reading all the time gets boring) so I decided I would just start flirting with the police officer. That was fun, he enjoyed the attention and I enjoyed the hitting on him. Sadly, no stories of arrest and soaps dropped in a shower followed, he was just a cool police officer.

Sweet juiceheads and (lady)bunnies, that´s all for now. Next episode I will talk to you about Colombiaaaa, because (guess what) this time I did not miss my flight. To be continued... 

big kisses with sea salt flavour,

your el merino