#Because yes I do very much so even without any romantic context I'm sometimes baffled by where they leave Eddie out or last or in the middle

[mangacat201]

MOOD.

Also, something something about the fact that every one of Buck’s major traumas and pivotal life events was encapsulated in the symbolism of the staging in his dream... except for one noticable GLARING absence (we got a plane, we got a firetruck, we got a ferris wheel, we got a snow path into the woods, we didn’t see a rifle anywhere)

Ok. Ohhhhhkay. I was ready to be disappointed with this episode, at least a little bit, but DAMN I see what you did there, writer’s room. This is not over, is it, this is just the beginning.

there's just something about the lack of eddie in buck's coma dream AND something about eddie keeping a distance from buck while he was in the coma that makes me SOOOOOO.

buck subconsciously CHOSE not to bring eddie in and interact with him. and even when coma!chris asked him to find his dad (which was basically buck's subconscious looking for eddie), it was at this exact point that buck was running out of time and he had to go back. and then there's eddie in the hospital, not coming too close to buck, always there but hanging in the back and letting chris go closer FOR him both times they were in the room together.

there's just something about coma!buck faking everyone BUT eddie, something in his subconscious blocking eddie from view and only letting him be there in spirit, a mere blurry sense of him hanging in the air; an absence that contributed to buck wanting to leave that place even more. and at the same time there's something about eddie forcing himself to keep a distance from buck, not even bearing to glance at him without crying, let alone touch him. he was turning away, staying at the back, fully sobbing yet trying to keep his feelings at bay, because he knew that any more contact would be too much for him, too uncontrollable, too revealing.

SOMETHING SOMETHING about these two men holding back from each other that makes me want to chew the walls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!