#Because unlike when Death in the Family happened you can't even use the excuse that Damian changed his mind

[wesavegotham]

The different parts of Gotham War not lining up at all in terms of plot, character motivation and characterization is bad enough, but now that DC is suddenly trying to explain when other titles like Detective Comics and Batman and Robin are taking place in relation to Gotham War it gets even worse because now all of these storylines make so much less sense too.

[valkyrieandstrangeridingaragorn]

There's things I am understand from Tony Stans when they write 'Steve mistake ',

1. They will using reason Steven choose bucky over tony

2. Steve hide / lie the fact about tony parents death

3. Steven is not read accord and not make negotiations about accord

4. Steve recruit clint, sama and wanda and make them in raft. So it's steve mistake

From the four point the third point is bothering me. I am not gonna lie I kind forget the detail civil war but, steve did and the only one that read accord. Also if I am not wrong Ross didn't give chance go steve and everyone to negotiations about accord at all, I meant he said avenegrs onel have three days accept or retired. I menat what kind f&** is that. They have no time to negotiations about accord at all

And Tony said the can make negotiations after they sign the paper, that not how work. You can't make negotiations after to signed the papers, the UN won't considered that they want control, you signed you follow what is inside

So I think it's was weord they blame steve no want negotiations at all. Because there's no time for that, also Steven considered the accord if they for innocent protection and not for government to controlling innocent peoples. So why they keep point that?

I think they need to come up with excuses, half-truths and lies because no matter how hard the Russos tried to paint both teams as equally right, Team Cap is the only one in the right.

To your first point, Steve is against the Accords way before Bucky is even in the picture.

This is something that not only the haters but many fans seem to forget: Not everything Steve does has to do with Bucky. He has a separate life and a mind of his own, and those Accords go against everything that makes him who he is.

To your second point, Steve had no way of knowing Bucky had murdered the Starks. Zola said this:

Zola: "For 70 years, HYDRA has been secretly feeding crises, reaping war. And when history did not cooperate, history was changed." Natasha: "That's impossible. S.H.I.E.L.D. would've stopped you." Zola: "Accidents will happen."

And this was shown:

This required Steve to assume Bucky had been the only Winter Soldier at the hands of Hydra. He could have guessed but he didn't know for sure. And going to Stark to tell him "I found out your parents were murdered but I'm not sure of what happened", over 20 years after the fact is not exactly ideal. Not to mention Stark had hacked Shield's systems two years prior. He didn't exactly do a good job of digging there, and Steve and he weren't that close.

To your third point, whoever says that is lying. Steve is the only one shown reading the Accords:

My man has perfect memory. He knew very well those Accords were an abomination.

And to your last point, Sam, Clint and Wanda have agency and they knew what they were getting into before they went to the airport. Unlike Peter Parker who was lied to by Stark, Steve was very clear that he wanted his team to know who and why they were fighting, and the consequences of doing so. Even with a stranger like Scott:

They chose to follow Steve because they knew it was the right thing to do. Clint left his family, Wanda risked her life and her freedom, so did Scott, Bucky and Sam. All of them followed and did the right thing because they're heroes, it's what they do.

Ross knew very well what he was doing. As Secretary of State, not only did he keep the Accords under wraps until only three days before the UN meeting, he kept from the entire team that an Accord is not the same as a law and it was a constitutional violation to try and enforce it on the team and the citizens.

They had no time to negotiate. They would have needed to lawyer up and do everything in a short period of time: the meeting was in Vienna and they were in NYC, if you count the time it would have taken them to get there, the time they needed to find a lawyer they trusted to go through the whole thing and come up with a good enough case to stand up not only to the US Senate but the UN… yep, they had no time to do so. That was Ross' plan all along.

Stark telling Steve the Accords could be amended after he signed them was no more than an attempt at manipulation. There is something important to keep in mind here: Stark would NOT be affected by these Accords at all. As shown in the movie, he broke them when he flew to Siberia and nothing happened. Ross called him and he put him on hold, and nothing happened.

Stark is used to doing whatever the hell he wants (like basically telling the government to suck it when he refused to give them his suits. What happened to him? Nothing) and facing no consequences whatsoever. So in his mind, signing these papers means nothing, he can break them whenever he feels like it and he'll find a way to get away with it. For Steve and Wanda, the Accords were a direct violation of their civil rights. It's not the same.

Steve was never against accountability. The Accords were:

[lurkingshan]

Every You, Every Me

Story 3

A mechanic! Not my Last Twilight trauma

Actually, now that he's stood up and I see this black tshirt and coveralls taken halfway down, his look is more Payu than Mhok

HE'S COMING TO ME

Okay listen, who put these mismatched hair extensions on this boy I just wanna talk 🔪

FIAT!!! I missed him

I continue to recognize but not be able to place most of the background music in this show, it's driving me nuts

What's with all these March 19s... no way

Are you telling me he's been stalking this kid at the graveyard for years on his mother's death anniversary? And he asked the mom’s dead spirit to bless their union before he even talked to him?? You a weirdo for this, X

He's never even talked to him all these years but he says he likes him. Love at first sight, I guess. "His mismatched hair extensions have bewitched me body and soul"

Btw why has this kid Namping had the exact same haircut for so many years, seems unlikely

I have no theory on the significance of their family members changing universe to universe but I am noting it

Does the little brother get a side romance in this one? They have two whole eps this time they're getting ambitious

This Bad Buddy style phone flirting across the balcony/window is very good

There's a real ominous vibe happening here, something is def going on that we don't know about

Well, that sure was a wholly unnecessary full body lift 😏

I think I would have preferred they use the time to go deeper on the main pair in this story rather than squeeze in a side couple, but this is a Thai BL, so

Something very charming about X getting excited and hitting his head on the undercarriage of the car

The extensions look better in this almost kiss scene god bless (btw that was mean, Namping)

The chemistry!! When they let them flirt these two are excellent

Hmmm Namping is P' here, but he def wasn't older in the last story, what does it meeeeeeean

"Stop asking" boy what are you hiding

Sexiest back hug of all time in BL?? Perhaps

Man, what the hell happened to Namping? Crying during sex and then disappearing on X and sobbing as he leaves. Why can't he tell X what's going on?? (and also me, please tell me). This all feels really needlessly cruel and I am struggling to imagine a scenario that would excuse it.

Welp! Ton showing up after a time skip alone, wearing all black, carrying a box sure doesn't bode well

The way they are dragging this secret out has officially become irritating. Just say what the fuck is going on.

Well, at least Namping knows he's a coward. Ffs. I cannot imagine how he justified leaving X in such an abrupt way, telling him nothing, leaving him waiting, knowing he will never come back. A terminal illness is not a good excuse for what he did to him, especially because his supposed reason was not wanting to be selfish. But his choices here were far more selfish and cruel than telling the truth and staying to be happy while he could.

This show is not really what I expected based on the way people talk about it. It's not all that light, for one. I've heard it described as being a fun speed run of fanfic tropes, but it's pretty dramatic (in the sense of dealing with heavier themes), and this last story at least was very melodramatic. It's the kind of maudlin terminal illness plot line you'd see in a decades-old drama. I guess that's the idea? We're just running through classic tropes, including some that have been all but retired. I still don't know if or how these different universes are meant to connect, or what to make of these characters. Should I view each iteration as separate from the ones before, or am I meant to think of these as the same souls repeating lives? It's interesting for sure.

[theghostwife]

Daemon vs. Alicent

So I saw a post on Twitter stating that if Daemon is responsible for Jaehaerys, then Alicent is responsible for Larys killing Harwin and their father and I have so many many thoughts about this. Firstly, I hate that fans of the show constantly attack Alicent. I'm not saying she's a good mother or a good person but blaming her for the acts of the men around her makes little to no sense. Normally, I'd just ignore tweets like this but the parallels I saw could not be ignored and so here I am.

Disclaimer: I'm not going to name the Twitter account I saw. I just don't want them to get attacked or anything.

First of all, their defense of Daemon stems from the fact that we never see him tell B&C to go for anyone else and because those words never left his mouth that we could see, they took it as it's not his fault. However, it was heavily, heavily implied that he did. Cheese asks what should they do if they can't find Aemond. The show allows us to fill in the blanks like we're playing hang-man. The sentence is there, the order is there, we merely need to fill it in.

Then we have his reaction to the news. Did we see surprise on his face? No. Did we see a bit of remorse for a 4-year-old getting killed in place of Aemond? No. He was pleased with the news.

In fact, when Rhaenyra turned to look at him, he was smirking.

He knew exactly what was going to happen and he's happy that at least someone was killed. It didn't matter that Aegon did not send Aemond to kill Lucerys. It did not matter that Jaehaerys is not Aemond's son. It did not matter that Jaehaerys was a child who had no part in the war or conflict. He was collateral damage. Even with all the feelings and expressions of horror around him, including that of Rhaenyra, he did not care.

At least until Rhaenyra spoke to him herself.

When she first confronted him, he says that he sent the Queen's vengeance for her son.

—————————————————————

Rhaenyra: "What did you tell this vengenace? What did you say to him? Daemon? That a boy lies dead and I am accused of killing him."

Daemon: "Mysaria provided me with names and subterfuge. I was clear in my instructions. Aemond, the brother of Aegon the Usurper. I cannot be responsible—"

Rhaenyra: "Cannot be responsible?"

Rhaenyra: "If Aemond was not to be found, what were your instructions then?"

Daemon: "They did not concern in any way that of a little child."

Rhaenyra: "You said it was your aim to spill Hightower blood. If not Aemond, then anyone would do."

—————————————————————

Despite the fact that he denies her accusations, she then goes on to say she doesn't believe him. Then there is this little number.

Now, here they get to the argument of Daemon, his resentment and bitterness that he was passed over as heir for Rhaenyra, and the fact that Aegon now sits on the throne. Even in the book, Daemon hates his nephews solely because they pushed him down the line of succession, so this one sentence here matches up perfectly with how Daemon truly feels.

It wasn't just "revenge" for Luke. It was revenge on the Targtowers, specifically, anyone in their family, any male. The death of Luke, Rhaenyra's declarance just served as a convenient excuse. If Aemond was not to be found, Daemon could have easily told them not to harm anyone else if he truly cared for Rhaenyra and her claim.

On a side note, I think this is really funny considering just before Rhaenyra accused him of using her as an excuse to kill Jaehaerys, she flat-out asked him if she was merely a tool he used to grasp at his stolen inheritance. It seems that in the show, Daemon using her as an excuse has come up more than once. Hell, even Viserys accused him of doing the same. It's just an interesting thing.

Anywho, let's compare this to Alicent and Larys Strong now shall we.

Unlike Daemon who commanded Blood and Cheese to kill Aemond, Alicent gave no such order. She didn't command anyone to be killed, nor did she want anyone to be killed. She merely stated she wanted her father back in King's Landing.

She lamented the fact that there was no one in King's Landing on her side. So what was Larys's response to this?

Larys took her words and acted on his own which resulted in the death of both Harwin and Lyonel. Alicent literally had nothing to do with it so I find it funny that someone compared the two together.

Then they mentioned that an episode later, Alicent rewards him. She wasn't rewarding him. Larys intentionally trapped Alicent with his deeds by stating he did it for her, in her name. If she were to ever expose him for his crimes, all he has to do is say she ordered him to do it in order to have her father back as Hand to the King and he would be believed.

As proof of this, in the next episode, Daemon accuses Alicent of killing Harwin and Lyonel anyway, without much justification other than her and Otto gaining from it. If Daemon thinks this, who else already believes either Alicent or Otto had something to do with it?

Later on in the same episode, Larys once again offered his services and Alicent knew better than to deny him, especially after she attacked Rhaenyra with the dagger, which damaged her reputation with the nobles and Viserys. That was Alicent accepting that she may in fact need his special brand of help later on but it's clear from her face, that she does not want it.

Also, to add to this fact, I think another reason why she said,

—————————————————————

"But your devotion has not gone unnoticed. These are dangerous times. The day will doubtless come when I require such a friend. With not only skill but discretion as well."

is because right before this, Larys subtly offered her the eye of Luke.

"If it's an eye you want to balance the scales, I am your servant."

—————————————————————

So that was her way of leading Larys away from maiming Luke but still allowing him close to her. Alicent with Larys is stuck between a rock and a hard place. This is very evident with him forcing her to sell herself, even if it is just her feet, he gets sexual satisfaction from both her feet and the act of sexual coercion as it gives him power, for basic information.

So the comparison between Daemon with B&C to Alicent and Larys with Harwin & Lyonel is in fact not at all comparable. I'd say that Alicent plays a similar role to Rhaenyra in that aspect and that is the parallel I saw. Saying one thing, making one wish/demand, and having a rogue man take your words, twist them to fit their own intentions and actions, and then say they did it your name while you bear the brunt of blame.

Speaking of the foot scene, this one could be a little different. Larys offers to have Mysaria killed because of her spy network which Otto is aware of but has left in place. Of course, here Alicent knows what will happen and essentially...pays Larys by showing him her feet. It's still an act of sexual coercion but in the end, Alicent says,

—————————————————————

"I assume this task falls within your expertise."

Which Larys responds with,

"If you wish it… it will be done."

—————————————————————

However, I don't think Alicent wanted the entire brothel to be up in flames but we never see her reaction to it, although I have a feeling she could have already known how Larys planned to solve that problem. Nonetheless, had the person on Twitter used that event in particular, it would have been a better comparison.

[icantthinkyandere]

yandere crypters!! specifically kadoc and kirsch if u can ^^

I've done Kadoc here, and I'm using this as an excuse to do Ophelia.

{Kirschtaria Wodime}

Out of all the crypters he is the friendliest out of all of them. He won't talk to you immediately other than a simple greeting he's done with everyone. But, they have caught his interest and once he's able to, he will

Once he finally does, oh boy, he will not leave you alone. Doesn't matter out how you react to, being nervous and confused because, well, he's Kirschtaria Wodime, he's an important person with an important job. Or if you don't care about him or know anything about it.

As long as they're not out right rude to him, he will back. There's something that he finds so enchanting. He starts to seek them out when he's done with meetings or has any free time. He has fun, and he likes his new friend. He does start to feel bad since he feels that he is ignoring others he is close with. But Olga is always busy and serious, Kadoc and Ophelia run away from him.

They have a different life from him(and probably a lot of different things, including interests outside of being a mage). He loves listening about anything and everything, no matter how strange or obscure. He's more than happy to talk about his life and interests, just not his family, mainly his dad.

I can not express how sweet Wodime would be would, during Chaldea you wouldn't even notice he's a yandere from how he just sits and listens along side how busy he is preparing to to take on the Singularities.

The red flag really would only start after Chaldea during the Lostbelts. If he is aware that the person he adores is alive, he will be worried sick. He doesn't want to rush the plan or anything, but he does not feel like you're safe without him. He can only hope Chaldea is taking care of them while Caenis dies since he won't stop talking about them.

If he is able to have you around during the Lostbelts, you have zero freedom. Since he's strong enough to take on Chaldea on his own, Caenis has babysitting duties! He goes as far as to write down what he needs to and might even lightly suggest using a command seal for him to listen.

He cares so much, and that does make him a little easy to take advice of. He wants to the people he cares about happy, and now that you've become the person he cares about the most, he has a blind spot for them.

That blind spot doesn't mean they can get away with anything. All it really means is that he doesn't think they could ever do much wrong, even when insulting him. Everything will be fine when his view of the world finally happens.

When dies during the Lostbelts, he feels sad that he can't be around them anyone, protect them, and make the world one they can live in peace in. But, he knows that Chaldea is the next best option and hopes the people there can love you as he did. Maybe Ceanis will keep taking care of them for him

{Ophelia Phamrsolone}

Ophelia is the opposite. Just because her feelings are more intense now doesn't mean she'll change that much. She actually does get worse, though. In canon, she isn't able to interact with characters she does like such as Wodime and Mashu.

There is no change she will ever approach someone she likes now. Unlike Kadoc as well no one will really notice and try to encourage her to at least try either, the only positive being that Beryl won't notice and be awful.

She wants to talk to them so badly that she just ends up staring at them. No, really expects her to catch feelings for anyone, so if her staring at both you and Mashu get noticed, she might end up getting reported, causing Wodime or Olga to ask if she has a problem with them.

She really doesn't mean to look creepy or like she has a death stare. She's just so nervous and trying to get the confidence to say "Hi." At least she ends up spacing out. Getting called out or not, she feels more and more awful as time goes on.

She can't talk to Wodime, who she admires deeply. She can't talk to Mashu, who's friendly and won't be rude to her, and now she's obsessing over someone she barely knows. She wouldn't have considered it at any other time, but maybe all the suggestions Romani made for the masters mental health might help her.

Her thoughts have become so overwhelming that she has to get them out, or else she might just explode. A dairy, art, poetry, anything. But seeing it done on paper makes her worse. She already felt sick from anxiety, and now that she's seeing her thoughts and almost fantasies on paper, she wants to throw up. 

She knows she just wants to get close to them and be loved. A lot of her feelings come from being a mage and the sexism from that world, but even acknowledging that doesn't change much.

Even the Lostbelts start, and she doesn't know you're alive. She sorta feels like this is where she belongs. She already feels like the worst person alive for creeping on an innocent person and placing unfair expectations on them. She places herself into a circle of feeling like she is a villain and then feels bad again because Wodime doesn't see this like an evil plot.

By the end of the Lostblet, she's happy to die. Maybe she can make up for the bad she's done that they aren't even aware of or even affected them. For you, Mashu, and everyone else.

Out of all the yanderes that can pop up in  Fate Grand order, she is probably one of the most self-hating. Her anxious thoughts get the best of her, and so does her morals

[the-wales-5]

"Rugby World Cup 🇫🇷 + 'the Intruders' " :)

15th October 2023.

The Princess of Wales was attending the quarter finals of Rugby World Cup between England and Fiji. Several fans of her showed up to the game, including one wearing a hilarious mask with Catherine's face on it. Two men brought themselves to the stadium with posters made of cartons with French sentences, which translated to < divorce and marry me > & < Not him, Kate. Me >.

The princess was unaware of their act until the very end of the match when her secretary told her about it and showed a picture that was already viral around all of the 'royal' social media accounts.

***

Upon home return, William was waiting for her. "England is in the semi-finals, unlike Wales" said Catherine after seeing him, showing him her competitive side once more. William narrowed his eyes a little. His wife was rather confused, so she asked: "Is everything okay? It was a simple joke, you know that, right?.." she smiled but that facial expression was quickly replaced by a different one as she added: "Just like those posters you probably had seen".

"Posters" William sighed and then looked at her face, asking "What was your reaction ?" He asked, awaiting her explanation of the Intruders as he called them earlier. Catherine tried not to smile and said "I laughed and.. By the way, where are our kids?".

William rolled his eyes again after he did not get a direct response "And what? What else happened?" He asked once more.

Catherine hid a sigh and replied "And I assumed that you will behave in this way. Losing in a competition is not always an easy thing. Excuse me, Mr Wales, but I would like to see our children right now".

William sensed that his wife was teasing him now and couldn't help but smile as he stared at her way.

*

"I am so happy that England won, mummy. Hope they will win next week and then in the finals as well" George said.

They were playing a board game together with Charlotte and Louis. Orla was 'watching' them, occasionally barking, especially when Louis was the winner.

"She is rooting for me" he said and giggled

"Lupo used to do something similar with me," George said as he remembered their old dog and his playfulness. His mother caressed his shoulder. Thinking about Lupo and other dogs in her family that already passed away was not simple for her either, especially when an anniversary of Lupo's death was approaching.

Charlotte noticed her sudden sadness and asked, "Mummy, is everything okay?" Catherine, without saying anything, hugged her children and Orla.

*

The princess was pretending to be watching the TV in the living room late in the evening. William approached her and put his arm around her. "You've got no plans to go to sleep tonight? You should feel sleepy after your flight and all the emotions you had"

Catherine looked at him suspiciously. "Emotions? I feel like you've had more of those than me and that includes jealousy again. Am I right?".

William took a strand of her hair away from her face as he replied "You're not wrong. Well, maybe not jealousy but a bit of anger when you teased me by saying that losing in a competition is not easy" he said.

Catherine smirked "Well.. Usually you love when I am teasing you and this time you don't? This is unusual for you" she said.

"This is because you told a lie" William replied while looking into her eyes, then kissed her neck. Catherine laughed "So you think that you won. England was the winner and you are supporting Wales so you lost. This is logical."

"Both you and me know that it doesn't only mean the match itself, Mrs Wales but the posters. Those men lost, not me" William said and before Catherine could laugh, he kissed her on the neck once again, more passionately.

"Be careful" she giggled "I won't accept love bites marks. Do you know how difficult it is to cover that later?".

William only smirked as he said "The weather's getting colder so you can begin wearing turtlenecks soon, can't you?".

Catherine giggled and pushed him back. "Sorry for you, Mr Wales but you were right: I am feeling tired and sleepy right now. Your proof of winning must wait until tomorrow" she laughed and went to take a shower.

As a 'revenge' and to prevent William from joining her there, she closed the bathroom room with a key. William knocked when he realised what she did a few minutes later.

"Are you serious?" He asked and then smiled after hearing his wife's soft laugh.

*

"Aren't you sleeping?" He asked about thirty minutes later when he came to their bedroom after putting their youngest child to sleep.

"I can't" Catherine replied

"So you missed me anyway" he smiled.

Catherine shook her head and replied: "Today when I was playing with the children, all of a sudden George mentioned Lupo and you know that--.. his death anniversary is coming and it is still not easy sometimes to think about it even when Orla's with us" she sighed.

"Kate.." her husband said and pulled her closer to himself "Of course it is not possible to forget about him and the way he left us"

Catherine blinked a few times and then she could feel William's forehead kiss and then another touch of his lips - on hers.

She looked at him and William caressed her cheek as he said: "You told me to wait until tomorrow for something more so I will but it does not mean I will not try to lift your mood up a little bit if you want, Mrs Wales"

His wife nodded as she said "Yes, you are allowed to do that I think.. But that doesn't mean that you're a winner in everything. Wales lost" Catherine smirked after making a decision to tease him for the last time that evening and that way she got her 'revenge': lots of kisses on her face and a few, <almost invisible> love bites on her neck.

*

"Thank you" Catherine said sarcastically the next morning when she stood in front of a mirror, trying to cover the marks William left on her neck the night before.

"You can still wear turtlenecks, and there is nothing in our calendars until November so it will heal, right?"

"Yes, unless you plan to prove something again" Catherine scoffed a little

"Next time I need to prevent some people with the cardboard posters from coming to the areas where you will be. Then, I will not have to prove anything" he said and laughed after Catherine threw a pillow at him.

~The end ♡~

[blubushie]

i think alot of vegans have a tendency to... antromorphize animals to a concerning degree. they don't have a concept of death and morality like we do, so it's pointless to guilt trip people with pictures of puppies or kittens looking sadly into the camera with an equally guilt trippy caption like "remember, if you still use animal products, their blood is on your hands!!" like girl that cat dgaf

I respectfully disagree on one part of this—animals DO have a concept of death, they just don't have cultures around it like we do. This is obvious especially when you work with stock like cattle or sheep but especially horses, who are Constantly Afraid Everything Is Deadly. Horses are the most anxious fucking animal on the bloody planet, rivalled only by cheetahs. Maybe.

This is why it's so important to socialise and desensitise your stock to people. It's one of the reasons factory farms are inhumane—no animal in a factory farm is going into an abattoir unafraid. There's simply too many animals for them to be properly desensitised by their handlers. And unlike slaughter in the bush, an abattoir requires handling and restriction of the animal's movements for the bolt to be properly placed. I can only imagine how terrifying it is to be brought to an unfamiliar environment and hearing the cries of the confused and anxious animals behind you as you're restrained and a boltgun is brought to your head. Cattle often need a second hit of the bolt because they're thrashing too much for proper placement of the first hit. That's fear.

But with animals like horses, or animals who are on small family farms, those animals are being worked with one-on-one often. They don't fear their handlers, and often don't fear strangers either. They're treated by veterinarians or by the handler themselves. Instead of standoffish, these animals are friendly. If you poke and prod at them they're calm. If you lead a pig out for slaughter, it goes freely. And when you kill it, it doesn't die afraid. This is how animals should die in meat production. This is what desensitisation means. This is why I encourage people to buy locally.

I'm not gonna lie and say our stock ever liked us. They were free-range cattle. We couldn't work with them one on one, they practically lived feral, so they were largely afraid. They weren't animals you could go up and pet because to them, we were massive predators who were dangerous, and everything with a brain fears death, or fears pain. Even if they don't understand what death even is, there is something instinctual inside them telling them to be afraid.

Sheep are often more relaxed—by the time slaughter happens, they've been sheared a few times and are at least familiar somewhat with people. Additionally they're more easily restrained and manoeuvred than cattle, which means we can get the process over much faster.

My concern with factory conditions have never been so much slaughter except the MEANS of slaughter. For example, chooks and other birds not always being dead when they hit the broiler. Or cattle being so terrified that they can't sit still for the bolt, same with pigs, or workers being improperly trained and therefore getting inconsistent bolt placement. Much of this is remedied with things like blinds (which prevent the animals from seeing you and panicking about it) and more efficient training. Other than that, my concerns are largely environmental—the conditions the animals are living in before slaughter, and how instances of animal cruelty are often excused or looked over even when caught on film (see: workers kicking birds or piglets).

Those kinds of advertisements are meant to prey on people's guilt. Oft they completely miss the target—dogs and cats are rarely used in any kind of animal product. At most there's lab beagles. Rabbits and mice are used in testing—speaking of which, despite mice being so similar physically and neurologically to humans, I have NEVER seen ARAs advocate for lab mice. Just rabbits, often against the beauty industry. I wonder why lab mice are looked over in favour of the cute bunny rabbits...

Almost like ARAs only give a shit about animals when they're cute. Like how it's fine to kill sea fish with their pleather microplastics, or drive reptiles and other animals to exinction by greenwashing deserts to grow their water-dense foods... But god forbid you eat a cow and use its durable hide that'll last you hundreds of years.

[hoghtastic]

If you look at their photos together in public when they first announced their relationship, Alex looks genuinely happy with her and she has her hand on his jacket like "look who I scored?are you jealous" clearly showing him off as a trophy. You can argue that she just wanted to announce their relationship because she is serious about him and vice versa, but honestly that is not the only impression I got. Anyway, to continue further with my analysis :p I kid you not one of the next signs is "Luring coworkers into wild behaviours or seducing coworkers or supervisors into romantic relationships". I don't even need to explain that one hah. The next one is "using manipulation to reach goals" (in this case using Alex's influence and popularity to get more exposure and further her career) and who knows if he also played a role in getting her on the show, I wouldn't be surprised. Next one is "scheming for personal benefit without considering consequences". With all the talk about her changing her aesthetic and her personality to match Alex's, she doesn't seem to have a problem adjusting herself to fake a connection with him. People with dark triad personality traits are often charming, well liked and skilled at false mirroring with others, this is probably also how Johanne was able to get his family to like her and have Alex believe they are so alike. Like another anonymous ask pointed out, she appeared to like him/be interested in him for a while before they got together so it probably wasn't difficult for her to study him and find out his interests and likes and adjust herself accordingly through time. I myself encountered these kind of people before and luckily because of my long time and obsessive interest in studying body language, human behaviour and psychoanalyzing people to death lol I am usually able to spot sociopaths and people with sociopathic tendencies by picking up on these behaviours. Sadly most sociopathic people are able to fool others very well and they don't get caught, especially if they aren't completely devoid of empathy. Again we don't know their relationship and human beings are complicated, not so black or white. She could be benefitting from him while also genuinely liking him at the same time, we are just speculating at the end of the day but damn if she doesn't fit most of the signs listed lol. Btw I have some pics I would like to upload of her and you can't tell me she doesn't look like a sociopath in them lol (can you tell I am obsessed with psychoanalysis?) I'm not really sure how to though.

As for people comparing her with Alicia Agneson. Alicia did seem somewhat like a clout chaser as well since she always tries to take pictures with him when they are together lol, but she never gave the impression of being a mean or manipulative person, I actually like her. IIRC they had a fling early on during the filming of vikings? but I'm not entirely sure what happened with them. Alex strikes me as the type of person who craves a deep and genuine connection with someone which is what Johanne is providing him with. Alicia is gorgeous and seems nice but she also seems a little superficial and dumb (I'm not even sure she even wants to date him tho or vice versa). Johanne otoh comes across as being a mature and articulate person and she is also charismatic. She probably picked up on this fact and was able to connect with him (how genuine she is with him we don't know) and remember Alex enjoys singing and Johanne is quite a good singer. (Yes unlike some people I think she is a talented lol). I watched a video where she won some singing competition I think? and she sang with a lot of depth and emotion, so that probably also won him over. Overall I can see why Alex is attracted to her but I genuinely do not think she is a good or nice person even if she happens to be genuine with him. Unfortunately irl bad people often get what they want and people often either make excuses for or don't see their bad behaviour. (part 2)

Anyway those are just my two cents

Part 2 of 2.

Thank you for your input and for your very interesting analysis, anon! 😊 It really is some food for thought! However, I’d just like to disagree with the part where you mention Johanne coming off as mature and charismatic. In my opinion, someone who is mature wouldn’t feel the need to play those little social media games (like “hinting” at them having a relationship in her instastories, or the infamous “you snooze, you lose”) just for attention, and you would expect of a mature person to own up to their mistakes and apologise when needed, instead of just deleting things and move on like nothing ever happened and they did nothing wrong (like when she posted that artwork which she wanted to pass as her own original creation, and when people found out and called her out for it, she just deleted both the picture and the comments, instead of crediting the original artist whose work she copied, for example). And about charisma, you’d expect someone charismatic to have a strong presence and personality, but personally, I can see neither. She comes off as bland, with the need to adapt and change her personality to better fit the ones she’d like to charm and be close with, which means that she has no real personality at all, just an amount of characteristics, likes and interests she “borrowed” because they suit her better at the time. 😕 Just my personal opinion, of course.

Also, to answer your question about submitting pictures, you can do so by either sending an ask or submission (though tumblr doesn’t allow those to be anonymous) or you can send me the pictures through a direct message, telling me to post them. In that case, I’ll post them here and you’ll remain anonymous. It’s whatever you prefer and feel most comfortable with, really. 😊

[global-ethichive-network]

Hello, everyone - this is Ethen.

I must apologize for the distinct silence since my last post. As you've probably already seen, I haven't been particularly well within the past week - before or after what I attempted to do.

Conquering one's fear isn't always the easiest thing to do - even if that fear is one that should have been left behind as time continued to pass.

Despite what many outside of our order have assumed, I haven't had the greatest life growing up, even long after I thought I had moved on from something so traumatic in my earlier years - it isn't exactly something I'm particularly open about, as is the rest of my history. I've experienced much more than one person could handle on their own, which is why my mental state in this extraordinary series of events has been constantly... fading.

I can't handle loss - it's an extremely personal gripe that's tugged at me since childhood, and despite being able to talk about it before to select few, I don't think I could ever do it again on a larger scale like I tried to do just a while ago. It's not to say that I'm afraid that people would think I'm just making excuses or that I need to toughen up - it's not the first time I've been told that, believe me. Even our own members have tried to have that talk in a way that's more... constructive? Supportive? Either way, that's not why I don't talk about the worst days of my childhood.

I prefer to look at the positives - what made it worth living, as those were the days that kept me going and why I've always striven to be better. Before the world became what it is now, it was easier to look at all of my past in that light - easily able to recognize how all the bad that ever happened was just a small fraction that overshadowed everything else. But now? With all the suffering that people are barely able to overcome, it makes looking back on all the good feel... selfish. A reminder of how everyone's lives - whether good or bad, were completely flipped around by something far worse. Where we are and stand looks like heaven compared to the cold, bitter world that everyone else has to sit through with each passing day - and while I've tried to show my sympathies... there's nothing I have that could ever compare to that, and those that constantly berate us with death threats, pleads for help, or even their lives ending in an instant... it just adds on to the overbearing weight that we all have to bear here.

It's why I tried to initiate that recreated experience all those months back - before another troubling predicament fell upon our laps. There are people in this new world that are out on their own - lost and alone without their families and friends to help them through the chaos. I tried to reach out to them with it - showing that even we had so much on our hands when the Quake had struck. I knew people couldn't bear to sit without answers as to why our silence was so prevalent, but that's because it's still something we can't risk telling the full details behind. We thought that by finding the deeper answers to that situation, we could understand what was at stake... and we certainly did. But the final piece was something I simply couldn't open after the Outsider had cracked it's code.

That should have been the sign. More pain isn't something people need when trying their best to survive in the world... if they want answers, they expect it to be told. So... sometime tomorrow, my truth will be brought out.

But in the meantime - I will leave you with the circumstances that came on that world-shaking day.

After the first waves of tremors and earthquakes is when I noticed the encrypted file under my name on the Ethichive. I passed through it's defenses - but unlike everyone else with an encrypted entry, what I received was far more impossible...

It was an audio file - or at least, it appeared to be, as a voice on the other side spoke directly to me... and only continued to do so with my every word, like it were a call. Just from the method of communication alone, I had every reason to believe it was from our loathsome adversary... but this was a new voice, and his intentions were anything but hostile.

He spoke of the events that were just happening, as if he had more information or means of detecting what was happening to the world. I hoped he could have been of better help to us - maybe something that would lead us in the right direction, but apparently he was just as out of the loop as we all were - despite how much he knew of us.

And especially how much he knew of me.

I didn't know anything of this man's identity, but it was clear this wasn't any ordinary follower, member - hell, even likely not as ordinary of a person as we were... but given where we all came from, it wasn't hard for me to understand who or even what he was. And that alone was enough to tell me what was at stake when he told me;

"The Storm is subsiding. And a new Storm is coming."

I was scared - terrified, even, because I knew one thing for certain... we had to prepare for the end of the beginning.

It's only a matter of time before the next Calm, whatever it may be.

[doggo-owns-this-account]

Yandere platonic Avengers x Peter Parker/Spiderman

Bonus: venom/Eddie Brock, Deadpool/Wade Wilson, Dr. Strange, The Flash/Barry Allen, GOTG

List to all parts

🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊

Bullied

Summary: They figure out that Peter is bullied

🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊

Tony Stark/Ironman

It took a lot of convincing on Peter's part to not get homeschooled.

Tony would prefer to keep Peter close, and have him being homeschooled under his watchful eyes.

However he can't say no to the puppy dog eyes either.

But when Tony does figure out that Peter is bullied, there's no way out of homeschool.

To Peter's luck though, it took a lot of time for Tony to realize that Peter is bullied, seeing as Peter is great at hiding it, and Tony wouldn't think that anybody has the balls to bully his kid.

Tony did finally notice it when Peter came home from school with a black eye.

God bless that bully because Tony will find out who did it. Any excuses Peter might come up with are not believed, and Tony is seething from pure rage.

How could he not have noticed this sooner? He feels disappointed with himself, and will make it up to Peter tenfold even though it wasn't his fault.

But what about the bully? Oh boy you are in for a ride.

Tony wouldn't hurt the bully if they were a kid as well, not physically at least. But instead the bully's loved ones are not as lucky.

Parents dead. Cause? Sudden car accident.

Siblings over the age of 18? Missing.

Cousins/uncles/aunts dead dead dead.

Oh but Peter's fate is almost worse than death.

He has no change on going back to school for a while and on top of that Tony is hovering over him almost 24/7.

However, when (after a lot of convincing and family nights) Peter finally goes back to school, everyone knows not to mess with him. After all, they just might find their loved ones dead....

🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊

Steve Rogers/Captain America

Just like with Tony, it took him a bit long to realize that Peter was bullied.

However unlike with Tony, Steve didn't even think for a moment about homeschool.

School is important to Steve, but still of course Peter's mental and psychical health are the most important to Steve.

The same thing about Tony and Steve is that neither of them thought that anyone would have the guts to bully their son, but unlike with Tony, Steve figured it out the moment he saw the smallest possible scratch on his boy's skin.

Unlike with Tony, Steve is going to hurt a kid if it comes down to it.

Of course, he would never kill a child (maybe), but when it comes to his son, he wouldn't mind punching a bully.

I mean, who would believe that the Captain America hit a child? :)

🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊

Bruce Banner/The Hulk

Well this is getting dangerous.

Bruce would notice it almost immediately. I mean, he used to be bullied at school too, so of course he notices if his son gets bullied.

However, it's not Bruce that makes this situation dangerous( just not yet at least), it's Hulk (obviously).

Hulk would not give a flying fuck who he has to kill to keep their son safe. May it be a teenager, an adult or even a fucking alien, Hulk would kill them all if they were endangering Peter.

While Hulk is more "punch now, don't even talk later" Bruce is more of the "talk first, punch then, and punch again again again again again again and again"

Of course, Bruce couldn't physically hurt another child (at least not badly), unlike Hulk, but he's dangerous without Hulk too.

He's smart. Like super smart. And he knows his ways with manipulation and playing with human minds.

If the bully happens to be an adult, like Peter's teacher for example, the oh boy aren't they in for a ride.

Bruce would make it slow and painful.

He knows just where to punch or stab them for it to hurt but keep them alive and in pain.

🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊

Thor & Loki

Nope. There's no way Peter's getting bullied. Not kidding.

Pretty sure that Loki and Thor has already takes Peter with them to Asgard, and only a fool would bully a royal. Especially if that royal has two overprotective gods hovering over him 24/7.

So it is highly unlikely that Peter would be bullied in Asgard.

However, on earth it's a different story.

Of course, Thor and Loki would want to take Peter with them to Asgard, but they also care about Peter's feelings and wants, so most likely they would take trips to Asgard from time to time with Peter, and spend most of their time on earth because of Peter's wish.

But still, it's quite impossible for Peter to get bullied (not for long anyways)

Someone makes a rude remark? The next day they are avoiding Peter like a plague.

Someone hits him? They dissappear without a trace.

But if someone makes him cry? Buh-bye Peter's school. And welcome Asgard!

🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊

Eddie Brock/Venom

Now if Hulk is dangerous, the Venom is a menace.

Eddie has teached Venom, that they can eat bad guys. And clearly, bullied are bad guys, right?

If it would have been any other situation, only Eddie would have had a 'talk' with the bullies, along with Venom just scaring them a bit. Y'know, threatening to eat them if they don't stop. But when it comes to Peter, oh boy.

It wouldn't take long for Venom to notice. Venom knows almost constantly what's going on with Peter, and he'll know immediately if something is wrong.

If it was just some mean words, it might take a bit longer for Venom to realize. Peter is good at hiding his feelings, but not good enough to hide them from an alien.

And that compared with Eddie's constant worries, it wouldn't take long for them to figure out what's going on.

Eddie is constantly worried about Peter. Peter is a good kid, and he's easy to take an advantage of, especially if it's some classmate making him do their homework or something along the lines of that.

So, it's understandable when Eddie gets paranoid and happens to stalk Peter trough his school day.

If the bullying is mental, the bully just might survive with lifetime trauma and a few broken bones.

If the bullying was physical however, well there's no one who has lived to tell the tale.

🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊

Wade Wilson/Deadpool

He may not be great with feelings, but he does notice when something is wrong.

And after that it's pretty much kill, kill, kill, kill.

He's not heartless, no. But he doesn't have any remorse for enemies.

And to add to that his immortality....

The least he would do is kill himself in front of a kid and scare them for life.

It isn't fun if someone doesn't get traumatized for life, right?

There's nothing he wouldn't do for Peter. He'd die over and over and over again if it meant that Peter would be safe.

There isn't really much to add to this since he really would just go right for the kill.

🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊

Barry Allen/The Flash

He knows what it's like.

He used to get bullied too when he was a kid, usually because he tried to help someone else from getting bullied.

And to add fuel to fire, Barry also knows that Peter would never hit a bully back, unlike he would've had.

From the very beginning when he took Peter under his wing, he'd been paranoid about Peter getting bullied, and it wouldn't take long for him to figure it out either.

He is the fastest man alive after all.

He's also very paranoid about Peter getting hurt.

A lot of people he loves has gotten hurt, and he ain't about to let some bully hurt his son like that.

Would he kill a bully? Now that's a hard question. But I'm pretty sure the answer is yes.

He has done a lot of things wrong in his life, and killing a bully is nothing to him.

Especially if it comes to his son's safety.

🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊

Stephen Strange/Dr. Strange

He actually thinks it's quite humorous.

Not because Peter is getting mentally/physically bullied. It's because someone actually thinks that they can bully the child of an overpowered wizard!

Honestly, it's funny to him. It's so easy to torture them endlessly just by sending them somewhere they don't belong.

But of course Peter doesn't need to know this. He's naive and innocent, there's no way Stephen's gonna let some useless waste of space ruin that.

🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊

Guardians Of The Galaxy/GOTG

Oh shit.

OH SHIT.

They're the guardians of the galaxy for god's sake! There's no way the bullies are getting out of this alive.

Then again, it's unlikely that he would get actually bullied when he's with the GOTG, mostly because they are most likely in space! Whether Peter wanted to or not...

But I wouldn't be surprised if some stupid suicidal dumbass insulted Peter while they're on some random planet.

Groot would be the most violent if he was a grown-up.

If he isn't however, then the most violent would be Drax.

At first, Mantis doesn't understand what it means. She's only just learning human emotions, so she doesn't know that it's a bad thing until someone tells her. She'll be so confused. How could someone insult/hurt an innocent cute human being like Peter? Ain't no way. The ones that do that aren't even people in Mantis' eyes, they're just monsters that are trying to hurt and corrupt something precious.

Quill knows immediately what's up. He used to get bullied when he was younger too, and ain't no way he's gonna let Peter go trough the same he did. Quill may not be the most violent or threatening of the GOTG, but he is however a demigod. And Quill isn't gonna let some lowlife insult his darling boy.

Gamora is feared/hated by many, and she isn't gonna hesitate for even a second to end anyone that hurts Peter, even if it was on accident. The least she would do if she's feeling merciful, she'd just break a couple of limbs. However, if Peter wasn't there, the bullies fate wouldn't be so peaceful.

In Rocket's case, no one even needs to bully Peter. Just stare at Peter for a second too long and you're getting shot. Quick and simple.

Drax and Mantis wouldn't care if Peter was watching. They'd just kill them, and comfort Peter later on, telling him that they did it for his own safety.

Rocket and Groot could never kill anyone in front of Peter. Or at least so that Peter sees what's happening. They all know that Peter is against murdering, and they'd be damned if they let some asshole make Peter feel bad for that said asshole.

🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊

Author: Sorry it took so long ಥ_ಥ

And for those wondering, I know that Flash is an DC character, but I really like writing Flash and I'm writing for my own enjoyment.

But still, I appreciate all the love and I'm willing to take requests💗

[syeph0fuck]

Ok Nico HC time wakey wakey guys I'm posting a cool

- Ok so despite how people think Nico is open with making out with Will or being horny on main honestly I think he doesn't even want to kiss Will on the lips in public just because he's like "Damn that seems kinda private." Or is worried someone will try to fight him about it (despite him accepting himself he's wary of what strangers think not because approval reasons but because he still has lingering issues from being raised in the 20s and hearing how gay people are bad and seeing how they were treated) and only overcomes that fear like, in his late 20s and that's all on his own.

- Will also has internalized homophobia, fight me. Be was raised in Texas so I think with my big ass brain that Will was also raised Catholic so he heard the same "Man shall not lay with man" bullshit Nico heard, but Will's family were like actually homophobic and that's why he stopped leaving camp, not just because Nico or because he's the best healer, nah nah that's an excuse he uses so he doesn't have to tell anyone that he's genuinely scared to go home because he's shit at keeping secrets about himself. This is the start of my Will trauma arc.

- Will and Nico are either both trans men and you can fight me to death about it or the unlikely projection that Nico is trans and Will isn't (BUT HE DOES A GOOD JOB AT SUPPORTING HIS BF) but in both situations they'll both fight you if you misgender someone like... Especially Will. He just has that energy like I know that if someone misgendered another camper he'd fight them. Especially if it's one of his siblings since like he'd probably be close to them he just seems like he gets close to people fast

- Will either gets no sleep or is passed out at 5 pm and that's outside of being a doctor.

- despite what everyone thinks Nico actually sleeps good like,, he's a heavy sleeper and once he's passed out he's out.

- projection but I don't think either of them are woken up by nightmares I think that when they do wake up they don't scream or anything its just like "oh fuck" and they're just kind of laying there trying to process of the dream was real or not but most of the time they're kind of stuck in that "I'm not fully asleep but not fully awake" limbo so it feels more real

- Will likes true crime. Not "likes" but he watches documentaries and shit and Nico does too. It's usually to both learn about shit that happened a long time ago or educate himself on issues in the world (since a lot of crimes are because of that) and to kind of get an idea of what he might have to see if he does decide to use his medical knowledge and become a doctor once he's out of camp

- In the PJO universe a huge case was of Nico and Bianca going missing since canonically their mom died before they went missing so everyone was like "hold on what??" So every true crime channel ever has covered it and Nico commented at one point "Oh yeah I remember that I'm related to them." Without realizing his name is in his username (he doesn't use his full name but either di Angelo was in it or Nico was in it bc yes) so some people were like "are you trolling" or other people were like "are you one of the kids??" And he's just like "...no... I'm.. named after one of them." Bc can't say he actually is one of them (but eventually it does get solved bc like he still has his regular ol DNA and he's like aha fuck)

- both Nico and Will really like their last names and make puns or bad jokes using them for usernames. They also just decided that their names are too cool to totally change and this was a mutual decision, mostly inspired by FUCK THE SYSTEM because like,, why not. Mostly just "wait isn't taking the last name like, a straight people thing and only for the woman" "oh shit you're right" "let's rebel let's not do that" "shiiit that sounds good though" "I know right" and that's why their last names didn't change

- Will likes snakes and rats. He's a weirdo. Also despite Nico saying he doesn't like animals he likes cats because what are these weirdos doin?? They're just silly billies. And he's basically the cat whisperer like everyone is always like "how the fuck does he get cats to like him that easily" and he's just like "Skill." Also Will has 2 snakes. They're also friendly snakes. Mostly because like hell Will is getting a snake that has a chance of biting him.

[puppywritings]

fidelium - johnny suh x gender-neutral reader masterlist

⇢   synopsis: you can’t wait to spend the weekend at johnny’s house. your boyfriend was a bad boy, and a motorcycle rider to boot. things were new, thrilling. perhaps more thrilling than you bargained for. you come to learn that it’s a lot more difficult to leave than to stay.

⇢   word count: 6.8k ⇢   trigger warnings: death, guns, toxic relationship involving manipulation, objectification, arguments. sexual elements and implied sex but no explicit scenes. ⇢   warning:  the relationship displayed in this fic is in absolutely no way healthy or ideal. it’s one red flag after another. if somebody disrespects your boundaries, threatens you, objectifies you, manipulates you, or anything of the sort, they’re not a good person to be around and they don’t deserve to stay in your life. the contents of this fic may be upsetting to read.

⇢   a/n: this is my piece for @du0tine​‘s 21 ways to kill your lover collab. intended for 18+ audiences. i also want to say, it’s not my intention to romanticize or glorify toxic, harmful, or abusive relationships - this is purely fiction. this writing also doesn’t reflect the real johnny suh, who i’m sure is a lovely person and would never engage in this sort of behaviour.

taglist: @prettyjaems @ethaeriyeol​ @1-800-seo​ @neonun-au​ (sorry if i forgot anyone i’m super disorganised w my taglists atm)

Johnny Suh didn’t fit your usual dating criteria. With his black leather jacket, heavy lace-up boots, and hulking motorcycle, he was a bit of a bad boy. And there was something exciting in that. You’d met him late one night, in the bar where you worked. You’d served him all night - rum and coke, his drink of choice. He certainly caught your eye, at first. He was handsome, with his brown eyes twinkling and his long blond hair pulled back into a ponytail. But it wasn’t until the two of you started talking that you became interested. It was a quiet night, and Johnny insisted on sitting at the bar in front of you. He was teasing, charming. And when he gave you his number at closing time, you actually tapped the digits into your phone, rather than just discarding it like you usually do. Unlike the rest of your patrons who thrust their contact details upon you, when it came to Johnny the interest was mutual.

So, while it was true that Johnny wasn’t quite the typical man you went after, the relationship had been going well. He’d been nothing short of a gentleman in the duration of your relationship, though he still thrilled you with his affinity for the more reckless things in life; late-night motorcycle rides, drinking just a little too much and partying all night. He took the mundaneness out of your life - he made your life an adventure.

Towards the end of your shift that Friday evening, you found yourself getting jittery; you checked the time every five minutes, and a swarm of butterflies was building in your stomach. Johnny was picking you up after work on his bike, and it was all you could think about. You almost ran out of the establishment, when the clock struck ten, marking the end of your shift. Your heart swelled at the sight of Johnny in the bar’s parking lot, leaning against his motorcycle with his hands in his pockets.

“Hey, angel,” he greeted you, affection glowing in his eyes and his smile.

“Hi,” you beamed, wrapping your arms around his waist and taking in his warmth. He picked you up immediately, holding you tight and spinning you. “Johnny!” you giggled, fingers grasping the cotton of his white t-shirt. 

“You ready to meet my boys?” he asked you, punctuating his question with a kiss on your nose. He was referring to the friends he considered family; he lived with them, in a rather large house on the outskirts of town, from what you’d heard. They were special to him, and you knew it was important to him that you got along with them. You’d be lying if you said you weren’t completely terrified. You knew it’d be okay, though. If they had Johnny’s approval you were sure they’d be good people. Plus, you could never be too scared with Johnny’s hand in your own.

“Ready as I’ll ever be,” you responded with a smile.

“Hop on,” he instructed you, tossing you a helmet and putting on his own. At the beginning of your relationship, he’d given you his own helmet, forgoing his protection for the sake of yours. You hadn’t liked this - this display of his reckless attitude that surpassed thrilling and sat nicely in the territory of dangerous - and so you’d pestered him until he bought a second helmet.

You secured your rucksack on your back, prepacked with all the clothes and toiletries you required for the weekend you’d be spending with your boyfriend, before climbing onto the large black bike behind him. Johnny had been driving you around on his bike for a number of weeks now, but you still weren’t quite used to it. The mix of fear and exhilaration, both from the wind whipping past your ears and from the sensation of your chest pressed flush against Johnny’s back, your arms tight around his waist. It made your heart race. The feeling you got from riding a motorcycle embodied everything that Johnny was: dark, exciting, intoxicating, addictive.

Johnny hadn’t been lying when he said he lived on the outskirts. The bright lights of the town centre were far behind you, and even the streetlights had begun to die out. You were alone with the moon and starlight now. The neatly paved roads gave way to rough muddy lanes. The built-up urban surroundings gave way to empty fields, then to a dense and seemingly endless forest. The bike’s headlamp shone a path through the trees, guiding Johnny to his home. Though your partner clearly felt familiar here, the environment sent chills down your spine - you could’ve sworn you felt eyes on you, peering out from the darkness. When your journey ended, at a solitary house looming tall against the dark backdrop of the forest, you were thankful.

“Here we are,” Johnny welcomed you, helping you off the bike. The house was bigger than you could’ve expected. The term mansion wouldn’t be amiss.

“So,” you commented, looking up at the structure, illustrated by the silver moonlight. “This is where you and your biker gang live?” You looked along the line of bikes, queued up around the house. They were of different styles and sizes, though (with your limited knowledge on motorcycles) they all looked rather impressive.

“I keep telling you, we’re not a biker gang,” Johnny corrected you, with a lighthearted roll of his eyes. “We’re just a group of friends who live together, and just so happen to ride together too.”

“And if that’s not a biker gang, what is?” you teased.

“Zip it,” Johnny said gently, and you complied. “Here, I’ll take your bag.”

“Ever the gentleman,” you commented, passing it to him. You braced yourself, as he led you into his home.

It was warm inside, much warmer than out in the chilly woodland. From what you could tell by looking at the entranceway, the place was tidy and well-lit. Your boyfriend led you down the hall, into an open-plan kitchen and living area, where Johnny's friends were sitting around the television. 

"We're home, guys," Johnny announced, drawing their attention towards you.

"Hey, look what Johnny brought home!" one of them called out, bringing a blush to your cheeks.

"Watch it," Johnny warned, wrapping his arm around your waist and pulling you close to him. "Y/N is all mine. You can look, but you can't touch. In fact, you can only look for five seconds at a time."

“These are the boys” Johnny introduced you to them. “This is Jaehyun, Ten, Mark. And that’s Donghyuck. My protege, right kid?” 

“That’s right, John” the boy grinned up at Johnny from where he was sitting.

You gave a shy wave as you looked around at Johnny's friends. Though he had named them all, introducing them, it was a redundant act. You'd asked to see pictures of everybody prior to that night, not wanting to get lost amid a sea of unfamiliar faces. You saw Jaehyun, with his dimples and broad shoulders; Mark, with pronounced cheekbones and a delicate nose; Ten, with a feline-like beauty; and Donghyuck, full cheeks and long eyelashes. 

"I think we're just gonna turn in for the night, right Y/N?" Johnny spoke, looking down at you. "See you boys tomorrow."

You waved at Johnny's friends, with a polite, "Bye." The boys chorused their goodbyes back at you, and Johnny led you away.

You couldn't help but admire the house as Johnny guided you to his bedroom, your hand in his. The place was huge, grand. You weren't sure under what circumstances Johnny and his friends acquired this house, but it can't have been cheap. 

"And this," he led you inside, "Is my room."

The room was a fair size, with several tall windows and a four-poster double bed. The matching furniture looked sturdy and high-quality, a dark antique wood.

"This is impressive," you told him honestly. Johnny beamed in pride; he was always looking for praise, and you were happy to feed his ego.

Johnny lounged on his bed, laying back propped up on his elbows. "Come feel how comfy my bed is," he invited you with a smirk.

"Johnny Suh, you are not smooth. I know that's just an excuse to get me into bed," you said, falling beside him.

"If you knew it was just an excuse," Johnny asked, pausing to plant a kiss on your jawline, "Then why'd you join me?"

"Because," you tell him, "Maybe I want to be in bed with you."

Johnny gave a low chuckle, before kissing you again; a line beginning at your jaw, trailing down to your neck, and ending at your collarbone, making you gasp and lean into his touch.

"Johnny," you purred, your voice full of want.

"Let Johnny take care of you, baby," Johnny hummed. You obliged, submitting to his touch and surrendering to the pleasure.

Coming down from your high, you collapsed against Johnny’s bed, smiling as you looked up at your boyfriend who lay beside you.

“You’re perfect,” Johnny told you, his dark brown eyes gazing deeply into your own. You felt the heat rise to your cheeks, and you looked away, only for Johnny to tilt your chin back up towards him. “It’s true,” he reiterated.

“I’m not perfect,” you denied, wrinkling your nose.

Johnny pecked your lips. “You are. My angel.”

You looked at him, lying beside you in his bed. His sex hair was immaculate, perfectly tousled from rolling around and from your fingers tugging on it. His lips were plump and pink from your kisses, and his collarbones were decorated in pink splotches. He looked beautiful, he was glowing, and you couldn’t help but grin at him.

“Hey,” Johnny says suddenly, sitting up and untangling himself from the blankets. “Let me give you a massage.”

“It’s okay, babe, you don’t have to,” you waved away his offer. He seemed deadset, however, cracking his knuckles in preparation.

“I insist. Roll over.” You obeyed, lying on your front and allowing your boyfriend to straddle your waist. His hands pressed into your skin, rubbing deeply into your muscles. The sensation was pleasant, you had to admit. Mostly, you just enjoyed the proximity between you and Johnny, and the feeling of being taken care of by someone you loved. You closed your eyes, allowing yourself to slip away and ease into the feeling.

You weren’t allowed to slip away for long, however, as your phone began to buzz, startling you. The vibrations against the hardwood of Johnny’s bedside table conjured a harsh screeching noise. You lifted your head, peering at the screen.

You lifted your torso, as much as you could with Johnny’s weight on you. “Oh, it’s my mom. I should-”

“You can call her back later, angel,” Johnny said, pushing you back down onto the bed. The action was gentle, but Johnny didn’t need to use much force to manipulate your body; your boyfriend worked out, and bordered on freakishly strong - at least, in comparison to you. His buff arms held your shoulders down, preventing any movement. "This is my time to pamper you," he explained, resuming the massage.

"Okay," you tentatively agreed. "I'll call her back later." You got the sense that this massage was much more for Johnny's benefit than for yours, but if it kept him happy, then so be it.

“Good morning, angel,” Johnny greeted you. Your eyelids fluttered open, adjusting to the light in his bedroom. With a groan, you stretched your muscles, stiff from sleeping. “I brought you a cup of coffee.”

You looked to your boyfriend, smiling at you as he entered the room, a mug in each hand. You couldn’t be sure how long he’d been awake, or what time it was, but he was dressed already, beige cable-knit sweater and loose jeans, with his hair pulled back in a low ponytail. It was a contrast to his usual greaser bad-boy image, and the sight warmed your heart. He looked cozy, soft. You smiled back at him, sitting up and letting the covers pool around your waist. 

“Morning, Johnny,” you beamed at him, accepting the cup of coffee he handed to you. You took a sip and moaned in delight. Your boyfriend made a mean cup of coffee, perfectly sweet without being overbearing. He sat beside you on the bed, caressing your cheek lightly.

“I was thinking we could go out for a walk,” he suggested, before taking a swig of his own coffee. “It’s a nice morning.”

You nodded. “Okay.”

A while later, fully dressed and hand-in-hand with Johnny, you found yourself venturing through the forest that surrounded the house. There were a few man-made footpaths winding between the trees, but for the most part, you were truly in the middle of nature, an environment completely untouched by humans. Birds flapped their wings, rustling in the trees, and creatures whose species were unknown to you scrambled to run away in your wake, paws pounding on the forest floor. Johnny had been right; it was a nice morning. The sun filtered through branches and leaves, casting light and warmth down upon you, and the air was clean and fresh.

“It’s so nice out here,” you commented, looking around at the greens and browns that encompassed you.

“Yeah,” Johnny agreed. “I’m lucky to live here.”

“You really are. I’d walk through here every morning if I were you.”

“You’re lucky, too,” Johnny acknowledged, squeezing your hand. “You’re dating me. You can walk here whenever you want as well.” You smiled, your heart swelling at his words.

“It really is isolated, huh? Your house?” you remarked, peering around at your surroundings. The nearest road was so far away that you couldn’t even hear the rush of cars from where you stood.

“Yeah,” Johnny confirmed. “It’s not easy to get out of the house.” Why anyone would wish to escape this peaceful surroundings, you had no idea. It felt so far removed from the hustle and bustle of everyday life; your usual troubles felt so distant.

The sun had risen higher in the sky by the time you returned to Johnny’s house, and you realised you hadn’t even brought your phone with you. You hadn’t even thought to check the time once since you woke up. This was so out of the ordinary for you, particularly on a Saturday morning, when you’d usually be lounging in your apartment scrolling through social media.

The house had woken up by the time you stepped through the front door. It had been silent when you left, though now it seemed that the entire household was up and about.

“Where have you been, John?” Ten called out, as the two of you entered the kitchen.

“Just out for a walk,” he explained, taking a seat at the kitchen island, where you joined him.

“By the way, Y/N, it’s nice to meet you,” Ten greeted you, smiling sweetly.

“It’s nice to meet you, too,” you returned, smiling back politely.

Johnny leaned in close, stage-whispering. “It’s really not all that nice to meet him. He’s a pretty lousy guy. Into some real weird stuff. Has probably killed a guy.” Ten gave Johnny a pointed glare as he departed the kitchen, and you giggled at your boyfriend’s antics.

“So,” Donghyuck asked, his voice somewhat muffled as he peered into the open fridge. “What do you guys have planned today?”

“Hmm. Not much,” Johnny answered. “Have some lunch, take it easy.”

“I want to shower first,” you announced, stretching your arms above your head. The physical exertion of your outdoor walk, along with your heated activities the night before, had left you feeling a little less than squeaky clean.

“We should do that together,” Johnny suggested, pressing a lingering kiss to your cheek, which flamed at his proposition. 

“Okay,” you giggled in spite of yourself. Johnny was the only man, since you’d been twelve years of age, who was capable of reducing you to such a blushing, giggling mess.

“Let’s go,” Johnny invited you, smirking as he stood up and held out his hand. You took it, and laughed when Donghyuck fake gagged and Johnny stared at him with daggers in his eyes. You allowed Johnny to lead you, your hand in his, all the way upstairs. After retrieving your toiletries and change of clothes, you joined him in the bathroom, closing the door behind you.

“The lock is funny,” he told you, leaning over you to fiddle with it. “You really have to twist it-” he grunted, “There we go.”

You smiled, bunching up his shirt in your hands and pulling him closer towards you. He looked smug as he leaned in to kiss you, his lips sweet and commanding. Your hands went under his shirt, ghosting over his chiseled abdomen, which tensed delightfully under your touch.

Johnny pulled away, his eyes scanning up and down your body, setting you alight with his gaze. “Why don’t you doll yourself up for lunch, huh? I want to show everyone how beautiful you are.”

“Okay,” you nodded, agreeing to his suggestion. He captured your lips again, and you smiled against his lips. “We need to shower, baby. And no funny business.”

“No promises,” Johnny grinned, his eyes twinkling. When he took his shirt off, however, your request of no funny business went completely out the window.

Sunday morning came all too fast, as your weekend with Johnny came to a close. It had been peaceful, relaxing, a greatly needed recharge, and you weren’t quite ready to return to your regular life. Walks through the city rather than through the woodland, and shifts in the bar all week long.

"I wish you didn't have to leave today," Johnny said, pouting as his fingertip traced shapes along your forearm as you lounged on his bed together.

"I know, babe, me too," you agreed. His eyelashes looked long, fanned across his cheeks as he gazed downwards.

"You should stay," Johnny suggested, a hopeful lilt to his voice. "Just another day or two?"

You shook your head at him. "I'm working all week babe, it's easier if I just go home. I can stay again next weekend." 

Johnny sighs, an irritated huff, retracting his hand from your arm. "You don't wanna stay with me?" he asked, looking up at you with hurt in his eyes.

"It's not that I don't want to, John, it'll just be complicated. You'll have to give me a lift to work, and it's so far that I'll have to wake up a lot earlier."

"You don't even sound like you're going to miss me," he pointed out. His voice had a tinge of anger and it frustrated you in turn. He was acting so petty - you hadn't seen this immature side of him before.

"Of course I'll miss you, Johnny," you assured him with a roll of your eyes. "But we can see each other next weekend, okay?"

"Whatever," Johnny scoffed.

"Whatever?" you asked incredulously. "Johnny, you're acting like a child."

"Sorry. Sorry I'm going to miss my partner because they insist on leaving me." 

You shifted away from Johnny, swinging your legs off the bed and facing away from him. "This is stupid," you muttered.

"I'm stupid?" Johnny exclaimed.

You rubbed your eyes in frustration. "I didn't say that."

"You didn't need to." Johnny jumped up from the bed, swiftly storming past you and exiting the room, complete with exaggerated stomps and a hefty slam of the door.

“God!” you cussed, in irritation and disbelief. You couldn’t believe he was acting like this. This side of Johnny, bitter and bad-tempered - you couldn’t say you enjoyed it. If anything, his outburst had only made you want to leave more. You cursed the complete and utter isolation of the place. You could hardly leave and catch a bus - you’d get lost if you even tried venturing out into the woods. Johnny was your ride home, and you didn’t want to face him. You weren’t even sure if he’d oblige, if you asked him to take you home.

You stood, scanning through your options, and your feet led you out of Johnny’s room. Down the hall, to the room you were sure belonged to Donghyuck. You knocked on the door, two uncertain taps. 

“Yeah?” Donghyuck’s voice called out from within - bingo. You pushed the door open apprehensively. The room was smaller than Johnny’s, though still a decent size. He had a large television mounted on the wall, hooked up to a gaming system that looked rather impressive, to your amateur perspective. 

“Oh, Y/N,” he remarked, sounding surprised and pausing his video game. “What’s up?”

“I’m sorry to bother you,” you prefaced, stepping into his room and closing the door behind you. “Johnny and I… had a bit of an argument. I was wondering if you could give me a ride home?”

“You fought?” Donghyuck asked. “What about?”

You sighed “It’s nothing. Something silly.” You didn’t particularly want to divulge the details to Donghyuck - you didn’t want to end up badmouthing Johnny to his friends. 

“Hey, sit down,” he invites you, patting the space beside him, on the end of his bed. “Come play video games with me. Take a minute to calm down.” You hesitantly joined him, taking a seat on the end of his bed. “Think this through, Y/N, it’s probably not a good idea to storm out.”

You picked up the controller Donghyuck gave you, holding it loosely. “Yeah, you’re probably right. Johnny wouldn’t be happy if I left without saying anything.”

“That guy has a temper,” Donghyuck commented under his voice. You felt inclined to agree, after the way he’d acted that morning.

“How do I play?” you asked, examining the controller in your hands. Donghyuck leaned over, running you through the controls and rules of the game. The other boy pressed play, and you were flung into the game headfirst, forced to learn and adapt to the fast-paced course of the game. You didn’t know how much time passed, but by your fourth round of the game, you were laughing and shouting along with Donghyuck, all thoughts of smothering boyfriends erased from your mind.

“Feeling better, huh?” Donghyuck asked, beaming at you. 

“Yeah,” you confirmed, nodding. “Thanks.”

“One more round?”

“I should probably go talk to Johnny,” you denied apologetically. “But thank you.”

“Any time,” he smiled, holding out his fist for a bump, which you obliged. 

“Bye,” you bid him, before departing his bedroom and moving down the hall. You stood for a moment, outside Johnny’s bedroom door, taking a deep breath and bracing yourself.

When you pushed open the door, you found Johnny already standing in his room. You approached him slowly and with apprehension, speaking in a calm and gentle tone. “Hey, Johnny? I’m sorry for blowing up earlier.”

“It’s okay,” he assured you. His composure surprised you, after the volume of his outburst earlier. He didn’t look at you, nor did he turn around to face you. He stood before his dresser, apparently very focused on something inside it. “Why were you in Donghyuck’s room?”

Your eyes widened a little. He didn’t sound mad, nor did he have the right to be. But something about the situation, or perhaps about his demeanor, made you feel a little jittery. You didn’t know he’d been watching you. “Oh. Um. He was just convincing me to stay.” You cleared your throat, feeling the need to change the subject. “What are you doing?”

“Come look,” he beckoned you. You joined him, peering down into the dresser which he seemed so enthralled by.

You gulped. The open drawer was like something you’d find in a museum; it was lined with crimson velvet, and several vintage-looking pistols were laid out in it. They ranged in size and style, the smallest being the size of your palm and the largest stretching to the length of your forearm. “I… I didn’t know you had guns.” The sight of them made your heart race. If you were being honest, you’d led a rather sheltered life, and had never been in the presence of so many weapons. It made you feel uneasy.

“I don’t use them. They’re only collectibles.” Johnny picked up the smallest gun, and you flinched. He glanced at you, and the look in his eyes was undetectable to you - it wasn’t offence, nor regret, but his eyes definitely glinted with something. The way he handled the gun, you weren’t sure if you bought the ‘collectibles’ line. He handled it with such ease and grace, that it almost seemed like he was born with a gun in his hand. Though it was small, compact, barely the size of your hand - and it appeared even smaller in Johnny’s palm, which dwarfed it - you found yourself stunned and shivery, thinking about the damage it was capable of. Did Johnny collect bullets, too? you found yourself wondering.

You averted your gaze, discomfort taking over, and noticed that your phone lay atop the dresser. Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion. You weren’t sure where, exactly, you had left your phone, but you were certain you hadn’t laid it there. “Hey - my phone-”

“Oh, right,” Johnny said, placing his gun back in the drawer and closing it sharply, twisting a key which sat in the keyhole, locking it away. “Your boss called. He said you don’t have to work tomorrow. That’s great, right? You can stay the night - you don’t have to leave.”

You nodded, feeling a little sick but faking a smile anyways. “Great.” You were tired, physically and emotionally. You felt bad for even thinking it, but you wanted a break from your boyfriend. You wanted some space. He was making you feel uncomfortable, bordering on unsafe, and you found yourself craving the security you felt in Donghyuck’s room.

“Um, I’m gonna take a shower,” you conjured the excuse for an escape. 

“Okay,” Johnny accepted it easily, smiling widely. He wrapped his arms around your waist, planting a kiss on your forehead. “Don’t be gone too long, alright?”

“Alright,” you nodded, breathing a sigh of relief when he released you. You would stay another night; it wasn’t worth upsetting Johnny over.

You had to admit that you felt a lot better after showering. The warm water had relaxed you, along with the familiar and comforting scent of your shampoo grounding you and bringing your emotions to a calmer, neutral level. You were standing before the bathroom mirror, applying moisturiser to your face, when you heard a click. A turn.

The broken lock.

Before you could act, Donghyuck was before you, staring at you with wide eyes. You let out a yelp, turning around, though most of your skin was hidden beneath your towel.

“Fuck, sorry! I’m so sorry! Don’t tell Johnny about this!” he blurted.

“It’s okay,” you responded, cheeks flushed. You weren’t sure Donghyuck had heard your forgiveness, however; you’d heard him dash away while your back was turned. You laugh awkwardly to yourself at the mishap, before closing the door again and making certain to twist the lock properly. It had only been a silly mistake, you reassured yourself. And he hadn’t seen anything, besides your bare shoulders, which was hardly a great reveal.

You shook your head, before drying and dressing yourself. The poor boy had been so flustered, and you had to admit it was sort of endearing.

“Nice shower?” Johnny asked when you returned to his room, lying on his bed atop the covers.

You nodded, joining him on the bed. “I feel so relaxed now.”

He pulled you close to him, kissing your lips gently. “Jaehyun’s making dinner for everyone, it’ll be ready before long.”

“That’s nice of him,” you murmured, laying your head on Johnny’s shoulder. “Poor Donghyuck, though. We had a really awkward moment in the bathroom, I don’t know if he’ll be ready to face me.”

You felt Johnny tense, his muscles going hard beneath you. “What do you mean?”

“He walked in on me showering. I don’t think he saw much, but-”

Johnny sat up abruptly, causing your head to fall back on the bed. “He fucking what?” Johnny hissed.

“Johnny, it’s fine,” you insisted. “I was wrapped in a towel-”

“I’m going to fucking kill him,” Johnny cursed, standing.

“Johnny,” you spoke firmly, grabbing his arm in a tight grip. “Stop. I said he didn’t see anything.”

“I fucking hope not,” Johnny growled, sitting down once more. He tucked a lock of hair behind your ear, stroking your face lightly. His hand was trembling. “You’re my angel,” he said. “I don’t want anybody else seeing you like that.”

“It won’t happen again, okay? I’m all yours, I promise.” You placed your hand on top of Johnny’s, soothing him with your touch. His temper, flaring again. This wasn’t something you liked much about Johnny, and you hadn’t been all that glad to meet this side of him. But, you bargained, nobody was perfect - you certainly weren’t. Besides, you had been ready this time; your firm tone and gentle touch had helped to calm him.

Johnny stood up, rubbing his face with both of his hands. You heard him release a shaky breath.

“Please calm down, Johnny. I’m sorry.”

“I’m fine,” he said, nodding certainly. “I’m calm.”

“Let’s go get dinner, yeah?” You stood, intertwining your fingers with his.

“Yeah,” he agreed, squeezing your hand a little too tightly.

Johnny’s rather sour mood remained all throughout dinner, as evidenced by his clenched jaw and the protective hand he laid on your thigh. His sullen demeanor made him somewhat of a bore to be around, and you found yourself laughing and joking with his friends; you’d be happy to consider Donghyuck a friend, and Mark was hilarious too. Johnny didn’t seem to like this, however. You spent the last portion of the meal in silence, quietly eating and staying close to Johnny’s side.

Even afterwards, as you watched a movie with the group, Johnny refused to relax and let go of his needless worries. Everybody was laughing at the movie, but you couldn’t help but notice that Johnny hadn’t even cracked a smile the whole time. In fact, you didn’t even think he’d been watching the movie; his eyes hardly left you, flitting between your face and your body. As though if he stopped watching you, something horrible would happen. As though he were keeping guard.

He pulled you closer towards him, though there was very little space between the two of you on the couch beforehand. His lips connected with your cheek, before straying down towards your neck. You felt your skin heat up in embarrassment, although all eyes in the room were still trained on the television. Johnny wrapped his arm around your waist, using his strength to lift you onto his lap. You squeaked at the sudden action, earning inquisitive glances from Johnny’s friends, which only fuelled how flustered you were. He held your body close to his, squeezing you. His breath tickled your neck, sending shivers down your spine, before he sunk his teeth into your skin. You hoped your muffled moan went unnoticed, but your eyes were shut tightly so it was unknown to you. You squirmed in Johnny’s lap, thighs clenching together tightly.

In another show of Johnny’s strength, or perhaps just his relative power in comparison to your apparent weakness, he lifted you swiftly. The abrupt movement surprised you, and you gasped sharply.

“Y/N and I are going upstairs,” Johnny announced to the group, and you silently allowed him to guide you away.

“Because,” he continued as you two left the room, “I can take Y/N any time I want.”

“Johnny!” you scolded him, mouth agape with humiliation as his boys hollered in your wake. He ignored your cries of reprimand, scooping you up off your feet with a grin on his face. 

“C’mon, baby,” he whispered, carrying you away to his bedroom. You sighed in fond exasperation, laying your head against his chest. You condemned his announcement of “I can take Y/N any time I want,” but the fact remained true that he could certainly take you then.

Monday morning. You were growing terribly bored of this big, old house in the middle of nowhere. Spending time with Johnny was nice, when he wasn’t baring his angry possessive side. Although you really liked him, you found yourself wanting some space. And so, when you woke up before Johnny, you left his sleeping form behind, pulled one of his oversized sweaters over your head, and set out to explore the enormous house that had become your confinement.

Nobody else was awake, or so it seemed when you ventured downstairs and poured yourself a glass of juice. You felt itchy, agitated. Even when you settled on the couch, the sense of calm you desired simply refused to fall over you. With an agitated sigh, you advanced throughout the house, exploring the ground floor. You had learned that all the bedrooms were on the first floor, and so you’d been wondering where one specific door led. Off the left of the hallway, aside from the kitchen and living area, and the ground floor bathroom.

The door creaked as you pushed it open, as did the floorboards when you stepped through the threshold. The room was dark, though you identified the furnishings of a study when you squinted your eyes. You moved to the far side of the room, drawing open the heavy red curtains thereby illuminating the space and releasing a cloud of dust at the same time. You waved the cloud away, choking.

There was a sturdy desk, littered with boxes full of clutter, accompanied by a rickety chair that looked like it would fall apart if you put any weight on it. You gasped a silent “wow” as you took in the wall opposite the door, lined with shelves that stretched from floor to ceiling, crammed to the brim with books of every size. You approached the extensive library, examining the titles. You didn’t recognise anything, apart from a few classics, but it was still an impressive collection. You began to wonder whether one of the boys had inherited the property from an older relative - none of them seemed particularly studious or academic, at least not enough to warrant an assortment of books this great. You trailed a finger along the spines, accumulating yet more dust. The books, much like the room in its entirety, had sat untouched for a long time.

“Boo!”

You shrieked, spinning around with your arms raised in defence, only to sigh in relief and clutch your heart. “Donghyuck! You scared me!”

The boy bent in half, in stitches at the fear he’d instilled in you. “I’m sorry! I couldn’t resist!” You couldn’t help but join in with his laughter; it was just so infectious. Even minutes later, you were cackling while wiping tears away from your eyes.

“So,” Donghyuck spoke, as his laughter died down. “What are you doing in here?”

“I don’t know,” you shrugged, still smiling. “Just exploring, I guess.”

“I don’t think there’s anything interesting in here,” Donghyuck claimed, looking around at the books.

“Really? It seems like hidden treasure to me.” You peered upwards, at the higher shelves, before standing on your tiptoes and stretching upwards, reaching for an eye-catching book with a golden spine.

“Careful,” Donghyuck murmured, placing a hand on the small of your back to steady you as you strained.

You heard Johnny’s growl, a split second before he entered your field of vision, entering the study and shoving Donghyuck away from you.

“Johnny!” you cried, feeling helpless and out of control as he squared up to the younger man.

Donghyuck had his hands raised in surrender, looking at his friend with concern tainting his expression. “Hey, man, calm down,” he attempted to pacify Johnny.

“Stay away from Y/N,” Johnny yelled, right in Donghyuck’s face

You leapt into action, maneuvering your way in between the pair, palm flat on Johnny’s chest. “Johnny, look at me,” you commanded him firmly. There was a fire in his eyes that you didn’t recognise. It flamed, bright and angry, threatening to burn anything and everything in its path. It scared you, and you resisted strongly against the urge to cower before him.

“Come on, Y/N,” he bit, gripping your forearm tightly. Potentially tight enough to bruise.

“Come on where?” you asked, stumbling as you struggled to keep up. He tugged you out of the room and down the hall, as you tried not to trip over your own feet.

“We’re going for a walk. Put your shoes on,” he demanded, arms crossed, waiting for you to obey.

“I- Johnny- What?” you sputtered. “Can I at least go upstairs and get my coat?”

“No,” he denied flatly. You rolled your eyes, slipping into your shoes. Wasting no time, Johnny pulled you out of the house, slamming the door behind you. You followed after him, your heart pounding with a mixture of uncertainty, anxiety, and speechless anger, as he marched you out into the woods, only stopping when you reached a clearing a good distance away from the house.

“Something’s going on between you and Donghyuck,” Johnny stated with hard certainty, as though it were fact. His face was flushed red, veins prominent along his forehead. He looked at you expectantly, but you had no idea what he wanted in response.

You sighed, rubbing your eyes tiredly. You couldn’t help but yell at him. “Johnny, what are you talking about? You’re my boyfriend. I like you. But not when you act like this, Jesus Christ!”

Johnny advanced, closing the gap between you, and you flinched when he regained his grip on your arm. “You need to stay the fuck away from Donghyuck, okay?”

“This is such a huge overreaction!” You tried to struggle away from his grip, but he was far too strong, his will iron.

Johnny leaned in, impossibly even closer to your face. “I brought you here, as my baby, to show you off to all my friends,” he hissed. “And you let them get their grubby little hands on you? I thought better of you, Y/N. I thought you were fucking faithful.”

Your heart raced, pounding wildly with how badly you wanted to get away from him. You didn’t think you could forgive him for this outburst. You just wanted to leave. “You’re fucking insane,” you shouted at him.

Johnny looked disgusted at your words. “Don’t talk to me like that.”

“Me?” you asked incredulously, finally shrugging out of his grasp. “Me, don’t talk to you like that? Listen, Johnny, I’m not your shiny little toy you can show off to your friends. I’m a human being. And you have no right telling me who I can and can’t talk to.”

“Come here.” Johnny was looking at you, his mouth a straight line, his eyes cold.

“Why?”

“Come here,” he repeated, and you hesitantly took a step forward, afraid to disobey him when he spoke in such an angry, demanding voice. Johnny reached out, gripping you by the arm before spinning you round quickly, pulling you close to him. Your chest was pressed tightly against his back, his arm across your chest, locking you in place. You could feel his heavy, ragged breathing.

“I’m not happy, Y/N,” he jeered, whispering into your ear harshly. “You’re my angel, and you’ve upset me. Maybe you aren’t such an angel after all.” You thrashed, but his grasp on you only tightened. “You’re not going anywhere.”

“Johnny, please,” you begged, your voice nothing but a hoarse whimper.

“Let me talk,” he hissed at you. “You’ve hurt me. And I need to show you - I need to hurt you back.”

“What are you- let me go!” You continued to flail in his hold, kicking out your feet but failing to do any real damage to him.

“Shh, it’ll only last a second,” he hushed you, his lips touching your ear and sending shivers down your spine. You felt him fumble behind you, and found an opportunity for escape, but it was no use. His grip on you was iron-tight, unrelenting. Johnny jabbed you in the chest, slightly to the left of your sternum, directly over your banging heart. You looked down, choking on a sob. 

One of Johnny’s pistols, the so-called collectible item, was pressing into your skin.

“Right in the heart, Y/N. That’s where you hurt me.” 

“Johnny, please!” you cried, struggling in vain. Tears blurred your vision, and spit flew from your mouth as you pleaded with him. “Let me go, Johnny, I’m sorry!”

“Goodnight, angel.”

You heard the gunshot before you felt it. In fact, you hardly even felt it at all. There was a bang, your ears rang, and then nothing. You collapsed, falling limp in Johnny’s arms. His angel.

[ambrosiaaddiction]

Not Meant To Be

Word Count: 3,750

Summary: Anthony became the center of your attention, and it seemed as though his feelings were mutual for you. But in light of recent events, he’d only be able to comfort you in more ways than one. With the help of a loyal friend, you have no doubts that Simon will regret leaving you.

Pairing(s): Anthony Bridgerton x reader, Simon Basset x reader

Part 3/6

a/n: Sorry for the incredibly long wait! I knew that editing takes time, but I didn’t think that I would have writer’s block for, well, however long I’ve had it. So much has happened, and I lost motivation after motivation. Although, it’s not entirely fair for those of you who want to read Bridgerton fanfic. Without further delays, here’s part 3!!

                   ⋘ ──── ∗ ⋅◈⋅ ∗ ──── ⋙

One might think that when he stood outside my home with roses, Viscount Bridgerton had finally set himself on the route to having a family of his own. The Viscount was welcomed by Charles and invited inside, which caused Mama to almost fall over her feet. “Lord Bridgerton! Heavens! What a pleasant surprise this beautiful afternoon to see you!”

It took a lot of willpower not to roll my eyes at mama's change of mood from just minutes earlier. Lady Bridgerton wrote to me her apologies, that were not even pertinent at all, and mama blamed me of humiliating the Bridgertons yesterday. Papa didn't make his typical remarks, but I knew what he had been pondering regarding my misdeeds.

Other than that, Lord Bridgerton told them his hellos, and when he saw me in the family room, his smiling face grew greater. “Miss Denbow, good afternoon. As it always is, you never cease to look so exquisite.” If I wasn't mistaken, I assumed he was intending to flirt with me, and undoubtedly fooled mama with whatever act he was putting on.

“Lord Bridgerton, how kind of you to give my daughter compliments after seeing what she did yesterday at the picnic. In this town, you and your family are truly the most genuine.” Mama was eager to speak in my place, and when she tried to bring up the incident for the second or third time, I swallowed thickly.

Anthony’s mouth twitched at the corners, and he stepped over to me in order to gift his bouquet of roses. “Lady Denbow, I do not blame Miss Denbow for anything. She was suffering and knew no other way to communicate.” Before he slipped back, his fingers lightly stroked both of my hands, then he sat in an empty chair.

Cheeky bastard. He was making light of my missteps, which Mama considered especially inexcusable. And for his compassion, I could not have been more forever thankful. “Oh, Lord Bridgerton, thank you. To hear you say that alleviates my anxiety. And thank you for these roses.” I ran over the smooth petals with my thumb, then bent closer to take in the fragrance of them.

But once again, with more berating remarks on my ‘unladylike’ and ‘outrageous’ nature, Mama ruined the temporary pleasant environment. “I can't understand why, my lord, you want to court her. She may be my only child, but I'm sure she would be a far better choice for another lord of her equals.” My own mother had a toxic tongue which might ostracize her if she didn't take caution of others.

In order to defend against the offensive expressions she was thinking about me, as if I weren't really there, I opened my mouth, but Anthony decided to stand up from his seat and settled next to me. “I'm going to say this as politely as I can, Lady Denbow. What Miss Denbow did at the picnic was not wrong, and she's a wonderfully capable young lady. You are her mother, and I must admit that what you have said makes me very mortified.”

With discomposure, Mama's face grew red and, at last, she remained at a loss for words. “Lord Bridgerton, my apologies. Forgive your mama, y/n. My intention was not to negatively impact you such a way. I'm worried you can't even defend yourself.” Excuse after excuse were all I heard coming from her, but I needed to leave this conversation in the past.

“Mama, I'm forgiving you. But please don't think of me like that. When you do not see that I am well aware of what I'm doing and what I believe is important, I am in despair. I'm no longer a little girl.” Mama nodded, but in sensitivity, she refused to speak as she left Anthony and I in the room alone. "Well, either that may well have gotten out of hand, or the way I hoped it would.”

A chuckle escapes from the Viscount, and I recline against the back of the sofa with a tired sigh. I loved my mama and papa, but sometimes they treated me like I would never age from my childhood years. Despite having no brothers or sisters, I had friends who supported me and shared the same interests as I grew older.

Having Lord Bridgerton here was an enigma that I couldn’t fathom, but I appreciated how he stood up for me when mama complained without cease. Now that she was gone, I took the opportunity to ask him as to why he came to my home. “Anthony, can you tell me the reason for your visit? We both know that you don’t have intentions to court me contrary to what outsiders might believe.” I crossed my arms and waited for a reply, which was his hand resting on the top of my thigh. Perplexed, I looked over at him to see his eyes full of sympathy.

“Y/n, what Hastings said could have been less severe than they actually were, and Daphne chastised him for doing so.” Anthony began, his grip squeezing in reassurance, and he gently pulled it away once I’ve had enough time to comprehend what he told me. It warmed my heart to hear that Daphne was upset in my stead, although I’m sure anyone in their right mind would have done the same for me.

My thoughts wandered to how both the eldest child and the Duke of Hastings were famous rakes with great influence. One had brothers who would take his title and estate if he were to pass, whereas the other had no known relatives and only Lady Danbury to defend his name after his death. I found it funny that I’ve fallen in love with the latter, and he was treating me like I didn’t have a place in his place.

I must’ve been worrying Anthony with my lack of response because he waved a hand in front of my face to bring me back into reality. I shook my head of the unrelated topic and smiled sheepishly at him. “I’m sorry. I became lost before I realized that I’d drifted off.” “Oh, it’s quite alright. Trust me, I do the exact same thing when I’m alone.”

“I’ll be impartial with you, Anthony. I hadn’t given it consideration that your sister would do such a thing, and for me, no less. Perhaps I’ve had the wrong impression of her from the beginning. Everything is going terribly, and I haven’t been able to think properly.” I wore my heart on my sleeve for him to see, and I didn’t care about exposing my weaknesses to him. But Anthony seemed be torn between hugging me and giving a simple pat on my shoulder lest an unwanted third party were to walk in.

If anyone noticed the unusual display of affection, then news would spread that rather than waiting to fulfill the courtship rituals, I was advancing on a lord. He wouldn't be much of a gentleman, in Anthony's opinion, if he were to neglect a woman in distress. “When you weep, I don't like it. It so pains me when I'm labelled useless, but when you're laughing, you look the most spectacular, y/n. Simon's blind and ludicrous, but I know you really love him, don't you?”

“You're right, my lord. Again. I need to let go of my struggles and to live my life to its fullest. The Duke encouraged what I would like to go do, become, and pursue, but under false premises, he is intimately involved to your younger sister.” I forced my body to stand, and in confusion, but without doubt, Anthony quickly followed. In my own house, it felt too stifling, so I concluded that a stroll outside would hopefully help take my mind off what occupied it at the moment.

“Is there anything other than whining and moaning that I could do instead? Wait, Queen Charlotte is holding a ball for her nephew, is she not? I do believe his name is Prince Friedrich.” Anthony gave a short nod, and I could tell that he was already dreading a night of being surrounded by desperate mamas along with their unabashed daughters. Who would blame the Viscount for trying to discourage total strangers from making unwelcome advantages?

I was unexpectedly given the best idea by his affirmation, and I couldn't wait to put it into motion. I wanted to prove my worth to Simon, which would make Anthony and the Prince the ideal partners to irk him. “What say you to opening Simon's eyes in the notion that I attract His Highness tonight? I will have to be in the most magnificent ballgown, and I know that you can help me with this.”

“In the heat of the moment, it won't take a lot of effort to raise feelings of inadequacy in Hastings. He will be fixated on Daphne and attempting to keep conversations with literally everyone who comes across him, but I don't find it unlikely that he will be observing you with the Prince. I know I wouldn't have the means to take my eyes off you, my dear.” That was just what I expected to hear from him, and furthermore. I felt that I had done well enough to seek a Viscount who had awareness of everyone else around him.

Then that settled it. I was going to win the Prince's favor, and Simon would spectate from the sidelines with no likelihood of attempting to snatch me away. It felt invigorating even to think about how it would play out tonight, but it would be seamless with Anthony's help. “For your time and soothing words, I am beyond delighted, Anthony. Until the ball, there is more than enough time, so I want to use it to aim for perfection. Tonight, I hope to see you, my lord.”

“Miss Denbow, I am forever happy to console a lady when she is enduring pain. And indeed, tonight, to my great reluctance, you will see me. For now, I will leave you and I look forward to enjoying your progress.” Anthony bowed as he started to walk out of the family room, and with a curtsey and a goodbye, I accompanied him to our front door.

Since then, hours have passed, and I finally found a dress from Lady Delacroix that was incredible. She wasn't even from France, and her accent didn't fool me.  Not important.  My makeup was done by Marianne, my hair was styled by Lucinda, and mama lent me her diamond necklace to wear. It matched the diamond earrings I got from papa on my eighteenth birthday, and tonight, nothing could go wrong. I was positive of that.

The time had come, and I was one of the few to arrive at the castle fashionably late. The eyes of all were on me, making my chest swell with pride. I got a glimpse of Simon and Daphne who were standing by the refreshments, and they couldn't stop watching as I elegantly walked down the stairwell.

To my amusement, Prince Friedrich was the first one to approach me, and he held my hand and placed a feather-light kiss on the back of it. “Good evening, my lady. You are by far the most beautiful and hypnotizing center of attraction in this ballroom. May I inquire for your name?”

I concealed the lower half of my face with a fan and smiled with my eyes, captivated by his mannerisms. “I have the luxury of being graced by your presence, your highness. My name is y/n Denbow.” After I've presented myself, Prince Friedrich's face lit up, and he guided me off the the last two steps. “To my ears, your name is like music, and it's perfect for a maiden like you, Miss Denbow.”

His flattery would make any young lady practically beg the Prince for a dance at the ball. Well, if he could ever tear himself away from me, that was. “Thank you, Your Majesty. You make me feel like I've got my head in the clouds. If you keep complimenting her, you will certainly find yourself a maiden to court this evening.” From my comment, I swore he blushed a bright red.

“Ah, hello, Prince Friedrich! Miss Denbow! I see that you have made friends with each other. Y/n, I'm so happy you've arrived safe and sound back in London.” Lady Danbury tapped her cane on the ground twice to emphasize her excitement, and I couldn't have been more relieved to see a familiar face among those whose names I couldn't match.

“I have so much to tell you, Lady Danbury. But not here, especially when I came so late.” I apologized to the Prince and wrapped my arm around Lady Danbury as we walked into a more private area. She furrowed her eyebrows together, but she didn't inquire until we got to the place where we could be alone. “Well, speak to me, y/n. What are you so worried about? And why did you come by yourself?”

I bit my lower lip and exhaled deeply, which all the more displeased Lady Danbury. If I tried to explain my desperate condition to her, she was going to have countless questions, and I knew she would never let Simon live in the humiliation he brought upon himself. “I'm sure you've recently read Lady Whistledown's column, and my relationship with Simon, Lady Danbury, is complicated.”

“Unbeknownst to me, when I was in France, he and Miss Bridgerton declared their engagement. He did not give me a letter or even a note when I returned to London that he had gone ahead with a marriage proposal to a young woman he had never met before. I invited him and the Bridgertons to have a picnic just yesterday. I have never been able to remain quiet forever; you know this, Lady Danbury. He lashed out at me, claiming that if he had known that I would be so self-centered and petty, he would never have gotten to know me.”

She went on a tangent as I predicted about how she raised and trained "the shameless rake" to do better than what he did. During the length of her grievances, I remained silent, then patted her arm softly when she started to run out of words to illustrate the Duke. “Compared to his late father, he's not terrible, but he might just be so after he treated you, y/n, and I apologize on his behalf.”

In disagreement, I shook my head, not acknowledging her apologies because she had nothing to do with that. In the sense of flirting with Prince Friedrich, all I wanted from her was to be an addition to humiliate Simon. “If we succeed, then he'll see the good thing that he lost because he agreed to marry another needy girl.”

This caused Lady Danbury to chuckle at my remark, and I had an inkling that her mood improved just a little bit. “I’ll take part in your schemes, girl. Now, let us return to the ball before we’re asked of our whereabouts.” She winked playfully, then gently pushed me back the way we came from.

Men and women danced to their heart’s content, their veins pumping with champagne and even the possibility that they will be courting after tonight. I see Anthony and Simon quietly bickering where no one could eavesdrop on the conversation, but their secrets weren’t going to be hidden from me. “Lord Bridgerton, I thought you promised me a dance?”

I chimed into the midst of their argument, and Simon’s mouth hung open in shock. He quickly closed it, though, and I bowed to him as acknowledgment for his presence. Anthony gathered the remnants of his dignity before offering a hand for me to take. “My apologies, Miss Denbow. I promise you that never slipped my mind from the moment that I asked.”

After the brief yet nerve wracking encounter with the Duke of Hastings, I’m led to have a dance with the Viscount and my new partner of schemes. I felt everyone’s eyes glued to us, which makes me uncomfortable because of the unwanted attention, but it dissolves when Anthony nudges me to look up at him. That’s when I knew how much I admired the man, and perhaps, there wasn’t any obstacle that we wouldn’t be able to overcome.

I may have lost my first love to Daphne, but I also had the power to pull the necessary strings to get what I wanted. Anthony tightened his grip on my waist then closed the gap between us, and out of the corner of my eye, I watched as Simon glare at our swaying figures amongst the others. The spectacle made me laugh softly against the Viscount’s shoulder, and his chest rumbled with a quiet laugh of his own.

“I believe that taught him a harsh lesson, don’t you think, Miss Denbow?” Anthony whispered into my ear, and an involuntary shiver ran down my spine. After clearing my throat, I nodded in agreement. The man wasn’t exactly reputable in every way, but he damn well had my respect. “Yes, it most certainly did, Lord Bridgerton.” I replied, head tilted downwards to avoid eye contact with him.

Once our dance came to an end, I was approached by Prince Friedrich a second time this evening. Young and older women alike flocked around his highness, and I took a small step closer to Anthony in fear that I would be ridiculed by them. Wait, what am I thinking? I shouldn’t be afraid of the people that make their bosoms unnaturally larger than they actually are nor should I be backing away!

“Miss Denbow, may I have this next dance? It’d make me extremely delighted.” Prince Friedrich asked, unknowingly breaking the tension growing between myself and the disappointed women behind him. All I gave him was a smile along with an enthusiastic nod, and Anthony released his arms from around my waist. “I’d love to, your highness. And I could say the same about myself.”

The prince took my hand just when the next song began to play, and we danced as if we were one. If I were being completely honest, he needed a little more practice with his feet, but I was enjoying myself nonetheless. We shared a few words and I kept glancing over our shoulders to see if Simon was keeping an eye on us. In fact, he had been watching the entire time, and Anthony gave me a signal that our plan had succeeded.

I bowed deeply to the prince when our dance came to its regrettable end, and bid him farewell for the rest of the night. Simon appeared out of nowhere then pulled me to an empty area despite my cries of protest. “What do you think you’re doing?! Just because you’re jealous does not give you the right to drag me as you so please, Hastings!”

“Will you keep it down, Y/N?! We both know that I’m not the only jealous one here.” He huffs angrily, and for the first time in a long time, he’s rendered me utterly speechless. No, I won’t play by his rules. Not when there was so much more for me to accomplish. “I don’t know what you mean. I’m simply fulfilling my role as a maiden who hopes to have a courtship.”

Simon rolled his eyes in disbelief, turning away from me so that I’m only staring at his broad shoulders. I’m beginning to lose my calm composure, and the more I stay alone with him, the less I’ll want to leave. He can’t learn of the nights when I suffered alone in France, and he certainly couldn’t force me to risk my reputation for his sake.

“You’ve changed, Simon.” My voice broke at the end of my sentence, but I continued to speak. “I’m not doing anything for you, so don’t get your hopes up.” He scoffed, not convinced by my words, and turned back to face me. His arms find their way around my body like they used to in the past. The next thing I knew, we’re kissing passionately against the cold marble walls.

He had me mewling his name over and over again, begging for a release that was on his fingertips. Simon muffled my sighs of pleasure with his mouth, and we fixed the bridge that was crumbling between the two of us. When we were satisfied, he muttered apology after apology as he kissed my skin. But we both knew that we run away with the position that he was in.

“I’ll figure it out, so wait for me. Please, Y/N.” “Don’t make me promise you, Simon. I want you to prove to me that I’m the only woman you love.” I kissed his neck and cheek, my heartbeat slowing to its normal pace before I fixed my dress. We’ve both been gone for too long, and I didn’t doubt that I would be questioned of my whereabouts.

Simon understood the weight of my words as well as what we would both face when we left separately. He kissed me one last time, and made his return to the ballroom until I did the same. Thankfully, neither Anthony or Mama asked where I had been, and I could breathe easy again. But now I was even more conflicted than before. I made Simon jealous, which ignited sex and doubt that we would be together after all this time.

Although... if I were to adjust my original plans in order for us to have a wedding and deal with the consequences afterwards, then it shouldn’t be very difficult, would it? Well, we would just need to face the challenges when the time comes, and I was determined to have Simon all to myself again.

[sillyrabbit81]

The Pull

Summary: Alternative Universe. Vampire Henry. Henry, Crown Prince of the Vampires is avoiding his responsibilities because of his mother's fate. When Henry finds his mate, the circumstances are eerily similar to his mother's. Rather than risking his mate's life, Henry chooses to run, but can he run from his fate?

Pairing: Henry x OFC

Word Count: approx 2.4k

Warnings: mention of death, mention of abortion (although it didn't happen), and swearing

Masterlist

Part 1 Part 3

Chapter Two

Rowena POV

"David, I can't wear this!" I complained on the phone. I held up the dress again. "It's just too much, too revealing."

It was a simple white silk floor-length skirt, but the top of the dress was two long vertical pieces of silk, barely wide enough to cover my breasts, which crossed at the back before wrapping around my waist and tied in a bow on my lower back. There was no way I could wear a bra. It would only take a slight wrong move, and there would be an embarrassing nipple slip.

"Yes, you can," my brother said. "Lawrence had it made for you to wear as a gift. He wants to meet you and make a good impression." Lawrence was David's partner, they had been together for over a year, but I was yet to met him. Lawrence and David seemed to travel together an awful lot, so it had been challenging to find time for us to get together.

"Have you seen it?" I asked.

"Of course," David replied. I was surprised. David was my older brother and had always been a little protective of me, especially since our parents died when I was 15 and he was 20. Maybe he had finally let that go considering I was now 26.

"You know I'd never wear something like that. It's gorgeous, but it's too revealing for me."

"Rowena, it's Halloween. It's an excuse for excess." I rolled my eyes. For David, being a day that ended in 'y' was an excuse for excess.

"Why does your boyfriend want to see me in this?" It just seemed over the top for a party. I gathered that Lawrence was wealthy, but still, it's just a Halloween party.

"Because he wants you to fit in. Honestly, you'll stick out less wearing that than anything else. Besides, no one knows you there, and you'll have a mask. Just pretend you're someone else."

I grumbled. "What time did Lawrence say the stylist was coming?"

Although I couldn't see him, I could hear David's victorious smile through the phone. "At six pm. The driver will be there at eight."

"That seems late, David," I said. "I won't arrive until nearly nine."

"I know, but that is Lawrence's style."

"Promise you won't leave me alone." I wasn't afraid of being alone at parties usually but by the sounds of this one, the dress and the fact that I was having my hair and makeup done professionally made it feel like a big deal.

"Lawrence and I will take good care of you," David promised.

I said my goodbyes and hung up the phone.

Feeling only a little more confident after the phone call, I jumped in the shower, washed my hair, and shaved my legs for the first time in weeks. I put on a robe and slippers and went up to the main house to see Charlie since I had half an hour to kill before the stylist arrived.

Charlie was staying there tonight with Alice while I went out. He had his own room and often slept there now that he was getting older and wanted space from me. Charlie and I mostly ate our meals up at the house and just kept basics in our two-bedroom flat above the old stables.

Charlie and Alice were sitting together at the dining table, playing with a random assortment of lego pieces. "Hey, Mum. I made this for you." Charlie handed me a flower made from the blocks. He was such a sweetheart of a boy.

"Awww, thanks, Babybear. I love it." I kissed the top of his head and sat with them.

"I thought you had to get ready for tonight," Alice asked.

"I have an hour," I replied.

"You're still going, aren't you?" Alice asked. She seemed more eager for me to go than I was. Alice was Charlie's paternal grandmother. Charlie's dad, Alex, had been my boyfriend when I was 17. Despite being on the pill, I fell pregnant, and Alex tried to pressure me into an abortion and refused to be a part of his life. Alice had been horrified by the way Alex had treated me. In an unexpected turn of events, she had stepped in to help raise Charlie. Charlie rarely saw Alex, but Alice saw that we both wanted nothing. The woman was a saint.

"Yeah," I said reluctantly.

"It'll be good for you," Alice said, squeezing my hand.

"I know." I sighed.

"Charlie, go get Nanny a glass of water, please. My throat is feeling dry," Alice said. She had something to say to me outside of Charlie's ears. Being a kind and helpful kid, Charlie immediately got up and went to get her one. He made me so proud.

As soon as he left the room, Alice said, "Rowena, don't feel guilty getting out there again."

"How can you say that?" I asked. I had tried dating a few times over the years. It always ended disastrously. Always my fault too. I had developed severe commitment issues.

"Charlie is my grandson, and I want his mother to be happy. Not lonely and depressed. It would be best if you had a life beyond Charlie. I've been telling you that for years."

Charlie came back with a book, and Alice read to him. As mothers often are, I was struck by how handsome my little boy was. His blonde sun-bleached hair and deep brown eyes were framed by a face that had lost nearly all of its childhood fat. At nine years old, he was almost as tall as me already, and he would probably take after his father in that regard. In fact, his eyes were the only thing that came from my side of the family as they were the same colour as David's and my Dad's. Charlie looked so much like his father, sometimes it hurts to look at him.

Kissing him again, on the cheek this time, I said goodbye to Charlie, told him to be a good boy for Nanny and went back to our flat above the garage.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I arrived at Lawrence's house not long after the sun had set. House was probably too humble a word to describe it. It was a borderline castle. I had thought Alice's family was wealthy, but this was another level. It was like something out of the Great Gatsby.

The car drove around the circular driveway and pulled up near the front door. A valet opened the car door, and he escorted me into the house, where he told my name to a butler who asked me to follow him.

Looking around the room, I was grateful to David for insisting I wear the dress. Everybody was dressed like it was a Hollywood awards show, and I mean everybody. Not to mention they all looked like actors or models. I had never in my life been around so many beautiful people. And I don't mean just beautiful because they were thin. There were people of all shapes and sizes, but everyone moved with grace and ethereal ease. They seemed so other.

This was crazy. Who the hell was my brother mixed up with? This whole night must have cost a fortune. Beyond a fortune! All for a Halloween party?

I was led from room to room, the house full of beautiful creatures. More than that, the house was decorated in a way that would put Versailles to shame. The decadence of the furnishings was lush and rich. Every piece seemed to be a precious antique but shone like it was brand new. Gold leaf decorated the cornices, and priceless framed artworks, tapestries and mirrors filled every wall. Even the wooden floor was an intricate parquetry design that appears to have taken years to lay.

At first, I thought I imagined it, but I noticed that everybody stared at me as I moved through each room. I felt heat rush to my cheeks. Did I look so different from everyone else? I supposed I did, but the eyes following me made me thankful for the mask.

After what seemed like hours but couldn't have been, I was taken to a large hall and presented. Yes, presented. What the fuck?

My escort stopped outside the room and spoke to a man standing just inside the door. The man rapped his cane on the floor three times and thundered, "Rowena, sister of David, Inamorato of Duke Lawrence." An eerie silence fell as every face turned to me. Some even bowed their heads. What on earth was going on?

"Rowena!" David was at my side, clutching my hands to his chest. "I've missed you so." He leaned over and kissed both my cheeks. Everybody in the room seemed to return to normal, and sounds of chatter resumed. David was wearing a mask and wore an elegant dark grey suit. He looked so different. David has always been handsome, but he looked so unlike his usual self, and I couldn't pinpoint the difference. I didn't even have the words to describe the change. I know it had been months since we had seen each other, but it wasn't that he had lost weight or gained muscle. What I could see of his face was inconsistent with my memories of him. Then I saw his eyes.

"David, what the..." David cut me off and embraced me. His smell was mouth-watering, and I wondered what cologne he was wearing. He had never smelt like that before.

"Come, meet Lawrence!" David exclaimed, gripping my hand tightly. Maybe he had put on muscle because he was stronger than I remembered.

David lead me further into the room. I followed, but my head was spinning. Why did everything look so beautiful but feel so... unreal?

"Lawrence, my love, this is Rowena," David said.

The man who sat before me took my breath away. I had no word to describe him other than impressive. He wasn't tall or large, but he seemed to take up all the space in the room as if by looking at him, your eyes couldn't see anything else. His skin was like a midnight sky lit up by the moon, which seemed to reflect the light as it was so smooth, flawless and radiant. His hair bounced with large curls, and although it was dark too, it seemed to shine with its own light.

As Lawrence stood, his movements were so polished they almost had a serpentine grace. His white lace mask framed his eyes, black with a red rim around the pupil, just like David's. Lawrence came towards me, and I was captivated, struck immobile by the force of his presence. Then all of a sudden, the fear left me as though it was never there. I sucked in air, not realising I hadn't taken a breath since I laid eyes on him.

Lawrence grasped my hands to his chest, just like my brother had. "Oh David, she is lovely, isn't she?" He lifted my hands to his lips and kissed both of them before lifting my arms wide and inspecting me. "She does look luscious in this dress. I do have excellent taste, do I not?"

I looked to David, who was beaming proudly like he had passed a test by bringing me here and meeting Lawrence's approval. Stunned, I looked again at David's smile. Something was wrong with it.

Lawrence was still talking, "You were right that she would be a hard one to crack. She seems to see many things others don't. Including you, by the way." David laughed at Lawrence's observation.

I tried to speak, to ask again what was going on, but nothing came out. I kept trying to breathe but I felt suffocated. The more I tried, the less air seemed to come in.

David grabbed my shoulders and caught my gaze. His voice was solid and musical, and the force of his words almost made me fall. "Rowena, it's alright. You can breathe." And all at once, I could.

"This dress is too tight." I managed to say.

"Nonsense," Lawrence said dismissively, "it's perfect. He is going to love it."

"He?" I questioned.

Lawrence sighed and glanced at David. They looked at each other for a few moments, then David took me by the arm and led me to a cluster of sofas. "Come, sister, sit with me and let's catch up."

Even the way he spoke seemed to change. It can't have been that long since I'd seen him. I thought back and realised I hadn't seen him in about two years. We occasionally spoke on the phone, but years had passed since I had physically seen him.

Lawrence left us mingled around the room, which I saw now was a ballroom. Some people danced, some drank wine, and others socialised. Something was wrong with all of it, but I couldn't put my finger on it.

David started to talk to me, asked me about little Charlie. I went to get my phone to show him some pictures and realised I must have left my bag in the limo. Before I could tell David that, he said, "never mind, the driver works for Lawrence. He has it. You can get it before you leave."

How did he know where I had left my phone? This was too much. "David, what's going on? There's something wrong here. This place is... off."

I suddenly felt bewildered, like I couldn't concentrate on anything. I felt a curious pull towards the back of the hall. I stood and looked back and started to walk towards the doors. It was like I was trapped in a gravitational pull towards... something. Without warning, a spontaneous feeling of arousal hit me, and my body was on fire. I let out an audible moan. I felt a desperate call come from between my legs to ease the rapidly growing craving. And not just by anyone, by Him. Wait, who was Him?

David held my arm and tried to lead me back, but I wouldn't allow it. I struggled for him to let me go. David was about to say something when another announcement was made, "The Crown Prince, Henry, Son of Alfred, King of all Sanguisuge."

I looked first to David to question what on earth that meant when I caught sight of the Prince.

It's Him.

I felt like I was falling, plummeting to the ground. The floor rushed to meet me, and my vision went dark.

Masterlist

Part 1 Part 3

@henryobsessed

[moonlightflower21]

ease my mind

a/n: angst. mentions of death. stabbings. all that good stuff. also includes mafia turtles. might not make sense but people wanted to read it so 🤷‍♀️😂

but anyway, as calm and collected and stoic leo can be, he has his weak points. he isn't immune to panic attacks or bad thoughts. enjoy!

How could this have happened? His world felt like it had crumbled to the very ground, turned into dust and flown mockingly into the air. Reminding how useless he truly was.

Leonardo watched his brothers follow inside the living room, Raph grabbing an ice pack to cool the knife cut bleeding out on his bicep. Mikey winced as he got rid of his waistcoat, untying his tie and letting it hang limply. His shirt was stained more in red than white, indicating his wound was deeper than he originally thought. Yet none of them spoke a word, barely even glancing in the leaders direction.

Leonardo looked at his team, most specifically Raphael. He had been quiet which had certainly been unlike him. Raph was never one to show how angry he was, always giving his opinion regardless of the topic so the silence coming from him was deafening.

"You good?" Leo's voice was slightly shaky not used to his hot headed brother being so silent about the obvious fail they just encountered.

Dark amber eyes connected with his and Leo didn't need to be a genius to know there was fury brewing behind those honeyed irises. Taking a breath in, he opened his mouth to say something but he noticed something else swirling into those eyes. Defeat.

"I'm sorry about.... You know I had-" "Fuck ya. That's.... all I gotta say ta ya. Yer really got some nerve ta put this on someone else. Get one thing straight, we're not indestructible. Not me or ya or Don or Mikey. But why am I wastin my breath on ya? Whatever I tell ya, yer just gonna go ahead and do the opposite. Like yer always do. And I'm gonna be the one ta help ya when yer run in ta issues. Like I always do" Raphael sneered, his hands in tight fists to control his temper. His tone was accusing, malicious towards Leo. And no one cane blame him.

"I'm not gonna bother waiting my time or energy bein' here. I can't do this no more" His harsh voice dropped to a whisper at the last sentence and he's not sure whether it's directed to his brother or to himself. He wanted to say something but nothing would be able to console how he's feeling tonight. Raph clenched his arm tightly, placing pressure in the damaged skin before pushing past his brother and to his own private room.

"Wait!" But the terrapin had left. Turning back to the rest of his team, Leo hoped he could explain what had happened. But their looks were cold and heartless.

Mikey stood tall, his stare in a hardened frown. He let out a small grunt, plastron burning with pain on his ride side.

"Look I'm-" "I've always stood by your decisions, always respected your commands and orders. But tonight was a fucking shit show and had you not lost focus, those innocent lives wouldn't have been taken. Some leader you are" Mikey scoffed, hands tingling with urges to beat the living shit out of someone. Leonardo stood, his brain unable to form comprehensible sentences to his answer. Was that how he truly felt?

"Mikey..." "Don't 'Mikey' me Leonardo. You were right after all. We may be brothers but we are not a team. Thank you for opening my eyes to that tonight" He snarled, a shaky breath as he applied too much pressure to his plastron. He swallowed hard, mind overflowing with poisonous thoughts suffocating his mind. Begging to be in a safe place but he couldn't find any. He didn't think he could ever feel safe anywhere. Not with his brothers or his family.

"Leave me alone. I have nothing to speak to you about, nor do I want to see your face tonight" Mikey uttered sharply, refusing to show any pain despite actively bleeding. He left in the other direction, retiring to his own personal chambers for the night. Leonardo gritted his teeth, trying to hold himself together. Trying to hold his composture together but it was dangerously close to crashing down. Maybe Donatello would listen. He was always good at reading people. Hopefully he could lend an ear before Leo's thoughts drive him insane.

"Don-" "I don't know what you wish to hear Leonardo. Me to say that it went good? That everything went well?? Raph nearly lost an arm, Mikey only has a new painful scar to his collection. You know how bad his plastron is damaged?? There's only so much that can be done to help it. And as for myself... well I'll let it speak for itself" Donnie lifted the side of his shirt, emitting a soft gasp from the eldest in absolute horror.

The wound was weeping, blood trickling down his abdomen soaking the rim of his pants. Leo's heart fell to the ground, his teeth sinking in his bottom lip to stop any vulnerability coming to light. Only know has it registered how much danger he had selfishly placed all his brothers in.

"But none of this matters to you does it? We're just soldiers to command, to help-" "That's not true Donatello!" Leo's voice came as a hoarse whisper, clenching his fingers tightly. Had his brother looked close enough, he would have seen Leonardo teetering off the edge of his sanity. The tremble in his body, the shaking of his arms despite how strong he stood, his eyes turning a deep blue emotionally overwhelmed.

"Isn't it?? Because the way I see it, you seem to have completely placed us at the sidelines. What happened to family? What happened to looking out for each other? What happened to your honour Leonardo?? These words you held with great pride are nothing but a jumbled mess of letters at your feet. If you cannot practise what you preach then I highly recommend you stop pretending otherwise. Excuse me, some of us have to help his family" Donatello frowned, walking past the blue cladded turtle to help his injured family members.

Leonardo's breath hitched, tears gathering in the corners of his eyes and spilling down quietly his cheeks. Honour, justice, family.... these words were for heros. Words for people that helped their country, he didn't do any of those things. He was a villain, killing himself slowly with his actions.

Moments like these reminded of his haunted childhood, how Splinter berating him for being worthless, how he would never accumulate to anything. Tonight those very words repeated like a record in his brain, unable to pause or freeze and he sat there listening to it all. Because it was true. He wasn't some warrior or a soldier, he was a mistake. And those horrible words ring in his head like an alarm, he didn't deserve to live.

Leo made questionable decisions tonight but his brothers didn't know how much burden he carried on his shoulders. He wouldn't forget those who passed tonight nor did he forget the injuries inflicted on his brother because of him. Was this how he wanted his life to be? Was this worth the pain and failures? And no matter how much those humans had wronged him, he swore to never turn like Splinter had done. Though now he could see himself follow in those very footsteps, heart twisted with evil and brutal thoughts.

They all lay heavy on his mind, constantly mocking and torturing of him of the leadership he once held with great importance and dedication. But now it started to disintegrate, proving his worst fear true that he was simply unable to protect his loved ones. That he couldn't even help himself. He could feel himself spiralling out of control and its times like these, he wished someone would hold him tight Ground him to reality, pushing those thoughts out of his body instead of laying low waiting to strike at his most weakest.

There he sat, sinking further and further into the pit of depair and self-hatred wondering if anyone could ever rescue him from this prison.

Wondering if he ever deserved to feel any happiness.

Wondering if he was better off being alone.

[simply-yelly2]

Here we have yet another doomed child, and gosh darn why do I make them so adorable? that just makes it very bittersweet.

@opal-tea (because her full outfit might have been inspired by your one doodle of little Hai from a Sketch Dump *whistles innocently*) and @justawfulxmenart for your brilliant picture of the Cobriana family as a whole, because I did some thinking while finding the colors for her. I kind of want to try designing my version of Sisal at some point because gosh darn do I love her, even if we never see her in person. I like to think that Sisal had planned to name her daughter Hai and shared this with her family and Anjay happened to mention it to Darien. Then when both Sisal, the baby, and Anjay are killed, Darien honors them by naming her daughter Hai.

Okay, canon-verse aside. Let's get into Kala's Rewrite AU.

This is Hatia (lose, to lose, lost, loser, losing in ha'Dasi), the daughter of Anjay Cobriana and Darien. She is basically my replacement for Hai since I had revamped Hai as the daughter of Oliza and Nicias. Unlike her canon counterpart, Hatia is not going to have a lucky break and that makes her quite tragic.

I really must question why Cjarsa took such an interest in Hai, given that her conception was against the rules and then Darien tried to commit treason of the highest form (attempted murder of Araceli, the Heir to the White Lady). Maya herself confirms the fate of most children born from forbidden circumstances, though now I wonder if they would stoop so low as to kill unwanted children...I feel like falcons would approach this from the same standpoint that you use when breeding animals with lethal genes. The ka'jaes (falcons without magic) are worthless in a place where the inhabitants breathe power, but yet purebred falcons struggle to reproduce because the magic that gives them power beyond all imagination, is also poisonous to new life. So while the ka'jaes are seen as lower-class citizens, they are critical to ensure the continued survival of the falcon race. Because while it may be hard to kill a falcon, I kind of imagine that living for a thousand years can get tiresome...maybe instead of death, some falcons fall to Ecl in an almost death. Heck, they probably gather their friends and loved ones and have some kind of party before they go, and then they are taken to the shm'Ecl and left under the care of Servos. Their family and friends can come to visit them whenever they want and...yeah, you need to replace them somehow. I feel the rule instead is that a ka'jaes is not allowed to have a child with a fellow ka'jaes. Because they are needed to create proper magical falcon babies, not ones without magic. Maya probably had her child sired by a ka'jaes man and thus her baby was born pure ka'jaes. The baby was taken away and its parents were both tortured by the Mercy as punishment for breaking the law. I kind of imagine that Araceli did not kill this baby, though Maya thinks she did and maybe that is the idea. The child was given to "proper" parents who would hopefully raise it to better understand and obey the Empress's laws. An even more bittersweet idea I have now is that Maya was forced to admit that her partner had raped her (even if it was done with consent from both parties) and that is what saved her life...but it cost the man his life.

Okay, I got really off-topic here. But you get the idea of what I am trying to say I hope.

Scanning through Wyvernhail, it seems like getting Hai on the throne was Cjarsa's plan all along. And the Empress seems miffed that Hai is not grateful for what she has done. I am not sure what Cjarsa planned to gain from this unless her plan was to ensure that Keyi would be born and Wyvern's Court would fall to destruction and chaos and then the world would be saved once again, thanks to the Falcons.

​On second thought, that is just it. I do believe the falcons felt threatened by the ending of the Avian-Serpiente War (because Anhamirak's magic could be combined and that is very, very, very bad) and sought to destroy the peace in any way they could. Why else would Syfka use her magic to convince an innocent Avian woman to attack Danica in such a way that she would be unable to have any more children aside from Oliza? And reading that part of Snakecharm, I really do believe the would-be assassin was in fact innocent, she is so full of remorse for what had happened that her Avian Reserve broke and she was crying with tears running down her face. So the bad guys in the Kiesha'ra series are the falcons, though they believe themselves to be the good guys, and this makes Hai being able to get them to leave her people alone quite amazing?

But enough about other stuff, we really must get back to discussing this poor little chick.

Hatia is born to Darien a few months after Anjay's death. Despite her feelings towards Araceli, Darien is immediately in love with her little girl and plans to raise her with Kel (Darien and Kel were on-again, off-again girlfriends, and a recent falling out was what led Darien to seek attention from another source). But sadly, this would not come to be.

Araceli, with two of her Mercy members, came to Darien's room. The two guards restrained Darien while the Heir took the crying baby away. Due to the bond between mother and child, Darien knew the moment when Hatia took her last break and the Mercy can feel her torment.

Deciding that Araceli has gone too far, Darien plots to avenge Anjay and Hatia and tries to kill Araceli when she is vulnerable. It fails, and Darien escapes to Ecl while Kel flees the island because she is unable to execute her best friend and lover. (Spoiler): Lilian is the one who falls to Ecl while her brother Mer survives that day with a scar.

A ka'jaes child could be excused as they are useful to the falcon population in other ways. But a quemak like Hatia and canon Hai? I do not see it. Hatia would have had magic, but it is unpredictable and the stigma of her mixed blood can't easily be ignored. The hair and eyes and her feathers being black with red gyrfalcon markings.

RIP little baby wyvern girl.