#Bc after Sirius left it all turned onto him and he felt all the pressure of it now

[everyonehatesell]

YOYK Bridge but it's the marauders after the war (ft. Lily and Marlene)

From sprinkler splashes to fireplace ashes I gave my blood, sweat, and tears for this - James after he died for Harry.

I hosted parties and starved my body Like I'd be saved by a perfect kiss - Sirius as a teenager, he was abused by the Blacks and slept around to distract himself.

The jokes weren't funny, I took the money My friends from home don't know what to say - Peter, after his betrayal.

I looked around in a blood-soaked gown And I saw something they can't take away - Lily, just before she died, holding Harry, knowing her husband was dead, but Harry might still live.

'Cause there were pages turned with the bridges burned Everything you lose is a step you take - Remus post-war, looking back on his past and his old friends.

So make the friendship bracelets Take the moment and taste it - Marlene during the war before she died, praying she'd be okay and living her life to the fullest bc she didn't know how much time they had left.

[writesowhatnext]

the feeling that we’re meeting // sirius black

Summary: Sirius Black has never liked the reader and this he made known. Maybe it’s because she’s a Slytherin. Maybe it was the bat-bogey hex. Strange, though, how things change with a war in full throttle.

Request: hello :) can i have an angst to fluff w sirius pls? (slowburn) post-hogwarts a few years where y/n was one of the main targets along w snape for james’ and sirius’ ridiculing and bullying, and they were just dreadful to her (she was in slytherin) :( but then a few years after hogwarts she joins the order and sirius acts just rlly immature and mean to her but then slowly starts falling for her as he starts noticing little aspects of her personality :) and at the end can there be like a fluffy cuddling scene where she asks him why he was so nasty to her and he talks ab how guilty and sorry he is :) ty babe!

A/N: I liked this request tbh bc it’s so important to remember that sirius is a brill character bc he’s so realistic with his equal good and bad traits – I was a bit liberal with canon context but I can’t say I don’t enjoy a world with James and Lily alive :) Also I listened to ‘For the First Time’ by The Script when I was writing and I agree

Reader: female, Slytherin

Warnings: female!reader, drinking, death eater parents, innuendo I suppose, also long af, injury, parental abuse, battle, deaths

Every time you tiptoed down the stairs of number twelve Grimmauld Place, you had to remind yourself that the war was far more important than whatever colour you’d like to dye Sirius Black’s hair. You considered pink, but thought better of it when you realised, he’d probably enjoy it.

It had been months, but you remembered the first time you set foot into the Black family home like it was yesterday. Following Dumbledore through the strange threshold, your nerves climbing as you heard the strangely familiar voices of the boys that had tormented you till you cried from the other room, you found yourself pulling at your sleeves, desperate to be anywhere else. The silence that fell as you stepped out from behind the Head of the Order was suffocating, and you could feel all eyes were on you. Biting the bullet, you glanced up from the crusty carpet, facing people you’d never wanted to see again. You recognised them all despite the years passed, standing together equally unenthused to see you. Remus was taller, impossibly, than you remembered him and Lily’s face was all angles now. Sirius’s hair was longer and styled differently, more like a muggle’s, but James still had the same half-broken glasses, and Peter the same child-like roundness to his cheeks.

“This, as I’m sure you know,” Dumbledore began, crossing his arms over his front. “Is Y/N-“

“Dumbledore, Sir,” James interjected, his tone as incredulous as his expression.

“You can’t be serious!”

You exhaled sharply from your nose at Sirius’ words, dipping your head when it seemed no one else saw the irony.

“Y/N is an excellent witch and she’ll be an excellent addition to the Order.”

“Sir,” Sirius huffed, shooting you a glare before stepping forward towards Dumbledore. “Her parents are death eaters; you can’t possibly trust her.”

“Remind me, Sirius,” you said, your voice echoing in the room for the first time. “What was tattooed on your brother’s arm.”

Although you were entirely correct, you felt a pang of guilt at the hurt that flashed in his eyes before the ever-familiar Black scowl creased his brow. Dumbledore’s presence beside you suddenly felt less and less comforting.

“She was always excellent in Charms,” Remus said gently. You faced him sharply, surprised to see his eyes so apologetic.

“And Defence Against the Dark Arts,” Lily’s tone was light and you were oddly pleased to see a smile on her face. You hoped that meant you would have at least one friend here.

“I wonder bloody why,” Sirius muttered, storming past you into the kitchen, shoulder hitting yours. You clenched your jaw, biting your lip to avoid saying something you’d reject.

“I hope you will treat Miss Y/N with the respect all allies deserve in this time. She’s risking her life to spy for us. You are all aware of what she’s put on the line for this,” Dumbledore said, an air of finality to his tone before he left you there, in the lion’s den, alone.

“Well,” Lily said, standing up from the armchair she’d been nestled into. She offered you a calloused and freckled hand with a smile. “Welcome to the Order of the Phoenix.”

It didn’t take long for the older members of the Order to trust you; they didn’t care about petty squabbles and rivalries, only the information you could provide. The story, however, wasn’t the same with your old Gryffindor pals. Lily, you accepted with equal parts hesitance and glee, was a fast friend. She had got into the habit of asking you how you were daily and offering you tea in the mornings. Sometimes, after a long mission, you found yourself talking into the night with her.

“Wait, wait,” you said, hand sloppily gripping the stem of an old wine glass you’d found in the cupboards. “You and Potter are married?”

She giggled at your response, leaning her elbow on the armchair next to her as she careened forward, the carpet crunching at the shift.

“Yes,” she nodded, smiling brightly. “I was just as surprised as you, at first, but he-“ a hiccup escaped her lips, earning a round of laughter from you both. “He’s a sweet guy. A tosser, by all means, but loyal and brave and kind.”

You’d never considered James Potter any of those things at Hogwarts, but now, in the real world, you found yourself slowly warming up to him.

“He’s changed, you know,” she said earnestly, suddenly a lot soberer than you felt. “They all have.”

You pursed your lips, taking another sip of the dark wine in your glass.

“Sirius hasn’t.”

She sighed, rubbing her eye with the knuckle of her thumb.

“He’s always hated me.”

Speaking of the devil, a familiar shadow appeared in the doorway before you could carry on your conversation. Sirius stared at you for a moment, his dark eyes locked on your face. He swallowed, mouth curling downwards slightly as he looked at your messy hair and casual position, sat in a place he’d hated for years. Something stirred in his chest and his expression shifted ever so slightly, but before you could question it, he disappeared up the stairs. You huffed, shaking your head as you turned back to Lily.

“See?”

It wasn’t another twenty minutes before James walked in, an amused grin playing on his lips at his wife’s tipsy state.

“C’mon, love. Let’s get you to bed,” he said, gently taking Lily’s arm to lift her up.

“Wow,” she said, whispering very loudly to you. “James Potter with a good idea; there’s a first.”

“Oi!” he laughed, poking her in the ribs and catching the wine glass before she could throw it onto the floor. It would’ve been a shame, you thought sarcastically, if someone ruined such a lovely carpet. He turned to you then, still smiling.

“Cheers, Y/N.”

He shot you a wink before escorting Lily upstairs, her drunk rambling fading the further away they got. You chuckled under your breath, pleased that maybe you weren’t such an outcast as you took another sip. Your mood soured dramatically, though, as you remembered the time, not exactly excited to be returning to your parents.

The next week, you had a few days between missions. Although you probably should’ve been resting at home like everyone else was, Remus included, you ended up on all fours in the Black family living room, pulling up carpet. Remus sat in the armchair at the other end of the room, a newspaper in one hand and a mug of tea in the other. Occasionally, he’d throw a teasing remark at you or ask for help with a tricky crossword clue, but mostly the silence that settled between you was comfortable. You were halfway across the room, surprised you hadn’t thrown up yet at the awful stains on the underside of the carpet, specifically avoiding the one that looked like blood.

“What are you doing?” a voice asked you from the doorway. You looked up, blowing a loose strand of hair from your face as you met Sirius’ eyes. You frowned, sitting back on your feet, carpet still in your hands.

“The laundry,” you replied dryly, a smile tugging at your lips to hear Remus snort into his mug.

“My mother loved this carpet,” he said, a strange look on his face. If you hadn’t known him better, you would’ve mistaken it for approval.

“And a charming family keepsake it is.”

He stared at you for a moment, his gaze steady and unreadable. You doubted whether destroying the carpet without asking him was such a good idea.

“Thank you.”

Without giving you a second to process, he turned left, the front door slamming not a second later. With wide eyes and your jaw on the floor, you looked to Remus, who seemed just as surprised as you.

“Did that just happen?”

He nodded slowly, his brows drawing together. You hummed, matching his frown before you started pulling roughly at the carpet and he returned to his paper.

“Six letter word for a muggle screenplay?”

You didn’t think that much more about Sirius’ gratitude in the next few days, too busy with keeping your lies straight and the war to waste time on why you hated each other. You did notice, despite yourself, that he seemed gradually less and less opposed to your presence. His conversations seemed to dry up less when you entered a room, his glare settled on you less often in Order meetings. As things got more and more difficult at home, the pressure from your parents to get the dark mark growing, it was the small things that helped.

“Y/N,” Peter said one morning, crossing his arms on the breakfast table. You’d warmed to Peter; he was always a little lost, a little wayward. It made you smile most of the time and you couldn’t help the motherly instinct you felt toward him, despite your similarity in age.

“Do you have a spare towel?”

“Why? What did you do with yours?”

A blush covered his cheeks and immediately you found that you really did not want to hear his answer.

“Yeah, I’ll fetch it,” you said, moving to exit the kitchen with a great deal of haste. You’d stayed at the headquarters a few times after hard or early morning missions and Sirius, despite your history, had been kind enough to give you towels to use. You’d been sure, though, that Kreacher, the house-elf, was behind that.

You hadn’t anticipated seeing Sirius in the corridor, muttering to himself as he stood next to the velvet curtain on the wall. His arms were full of what could only be described as junk, the nail of an old bed-frame catching on the fabric. He didn’t notice you behind him as he struggled and with a decidedly irritated yank, he pulled the wooden post free. However, much to his chagrin, and everyone in the house’s eardrums, the curtains fell loose and an extortionately loud screeching filled the air.

“This house is full of blood traitors! Mudbloods!” it hissed, echoing through all the rooms. Seeing Sirius’ arms full, you bent down next to him and gripped the metal rod of the curtain, eager to put it back into place. He jumped a little when he saw you, stumbling out the way slightly, his eyebrows threading together as the high-pitched shouting continued. You took one look at the ugly, yellowing woman in the portrait and shoved the curtain in front of her face, hoping you’d never see it again. It took some jiggling, but soon the portrait was covered and you could only hear rustling behind the fabric, muzzled yells rattling the frame.

“A charming woman, your Mother was. I’m surprised you don’t leave the curtains open all the time,” you said, a distasteful expression tainting your features. Sirius looked at you for a moment, his jaw clenching slightly.

“It’s okay,” you said, smiling a little. “You can laugh.”

He didn’t, but the slight upward curve of his lip didn’t escape you.

“Did you ever have the pleasure to meet her in the flesh?” he asked. Your brows raised at the first real question he’d asked you since you joined the Order.

“No, sadly not,” you crossed your arms and leant on the door. “My parents spoke highly of her, though, which is never the best sign.”

He only nodded, standing awkwardly for a moment before turning to leave. You blinked, before remembering where you’d been going.

“Sirius,” you began, the light tone not suiting his name in your mouth. “Do you have spare towels? Peter-“

Sirius smirked, a strangely handsome expression on him.

“Peter dropped chocolate frogs all over his again,” he huffed, shaking his head. “Just ask Kreacher.”

You barely paid attention to him leaving as you wandered upstairs, in search of the grumpy house-elf. You were pleased to know that Peter’s towel hadn’t been ruined by something more suspect than chocolate, but you couldn’t deny that you were even more pleased that you’d finally had an interaction with Sirius that didn’t involve a row.

Your next interaction, though, was less than ideal. You stumbled toward twelve Grimmauld place with a throbbing headache and shaky legs. Your parents had not been kind when they discovered your treachery, your place in the Order; you were lucky to escape with your life. That’s all you could tell yourself as you dragged yourself up the steps, knocking loudly on the door. It was just your luck for Sirius, of all people, to open it. His expression was at first worried before he realised it was you and a frown settled on his features. As you looked down, trying to concentrate on the swaying floor, you didn’t notice the concern that returned upon seeing your injuries.

“What the blood-“ he began, grunting slightly as you collapsed into him, no longer able to keep your body upright.

You woke the next day in a clean bed with a dull headache. The house-elf shuffling around your room had garnered your attention, and you blinked at him as he placed towels, sheets and clothes in a pile next to the bed.

“Kreacher?” you asked, your voice sore in your throat. “Why am I here?”

“You’re a blood trait-“

You shot him a dry look.

“I mean, how did I get here? Why are you putting clothes out?”

The house-elf sighed, a grizzly sound.

“Master Sirius ordered me to,” he said gruffly. “Said you shall be living here.”

“Oh.”

You frowned, barely registering Kreacher as he made to leave.

“Thank you,” you called after him, earning a grumble in response.

You and Sirius never spoke about the fact that you were now living in the Order Headquarters, in his house, but you never forgot the kindness he showed you. It was a strange feeling, to be grateful to Sirius Black, especially after everything he’d done to you as a student. The topic of your parents didn’t even come up until the night before a particularly difficult mission planning to infiltrate a meeting of death eaters.

“Lily,” you said, sitting on the counter in the kitchen with the others dotted around, even Sirius. “I don’t know if I should come on this mission.”

“What?” Remus asked, placing the chocolate he’d been aiming from his mouth down on the tablecloth.

“I was useful to the Order when I knew things and now,” your voice broke slightly at the memory of the last time you’d seen your parents. “Now I have no information and I might have to… I might have to fight the people that raised me tonight and they don’t have any qualms about killing me or any of you where we stand.”

“Exactly!” James said, moving his arm from the back of Lily’s chair to rest his elbows on the table. “They don’t care about killing us. They killed Gideon and Fabien. You saw what they did to Frank and Alice.”

Your chest tightened. Frank and Alice had always been kind to you; now they were at St. Mungo’s.

“Information or not,” Sirius said, surprising everyone. “You’re a good fighter; we need that.”

The silence that followed his words made you feel like you were missing something as you stared at him, seeing his eyes soft for the first time.

“Sirius is right,” Lily said, nodding. “We have to do all we can; you know that more than most of us.”

The mission had been horrendous.

It had been a bloodbath of proportions you’d never seen before. You’d lost Benjy and Caradoc and Dorcas; people you looked up to. You’d expected losses in a war, you weren’t stupid, but you’d never anticipated the weight behind a spell thrown by your own parents. Despite your own casualties, you’d taken out six death eaters and despite yourself, you were glad your parents weren’t among them. The journey back to the house was a quiet one: Lily busied herself with James’ broken arm and Remus wiped the blood from Sirius’ forehead, dabbing delicately at the cut above his eyebrow. You all disbanded when you got inside, tired and aching, disappearing into your rooms with heavy hearts.

You couldn’t sleep, though, too haunted by the flashes that appeared behind your eyes. It must’ve been past midnight when you tiptoed downstairs, more desperate than ever to not agitate the portrait. You didn’t notice Sirius in the kitchen until you’d shut the door behind you, jumping out of your skin to see him sat there with a glass and a bottle of firewhiskey.

“Didn’t mean to scare you,” he said, lifting his glass and taking a swig. You’d come down for tea, but the idea of numbing your senses appealed. He must’ve noticed the way your eyes lingered on his glass and without a word, he reached behind him to grab another, pouring you a liberal shot. You sat down almost tentatively, fingers gliding around the edges of the glass.

He watched with an amused smile as you downed the whole thing, wincing at the burn before you rested it back on the table. He filled it again immediately.

“Rough night.”

“Indeed,” you said, rubbing your eyes and sighing. “I never thought we’d be here.”

He raised an eyebrow, stretching the bandage on his forehead as his lips pressed against the rim of the glass.

“Me and you,” you laughed a little. “Drinking together.”

“Not something I’d have bet on,” he muttered, laughing too. Your smiles both faded as you looked at each other, though, across the plastic gingham table cloth.

“Why do you hate me so much?”

The question tumbled from your lips before you could stop it.

“I don’t hate you.”

You shot him a very dry glance. He shook his head and sighed, putting his glass down a little too loudly before running a hand through his hair, looking anywhere but you.

“You’re a pureblood Slytherin,” he said, running his hands over his face. “And I hated it. I hated anyone that reminded me of this place. And you- you were everything my parents wanted me to be: smart, loyal… dark, I thought.”

You nodded, sipping your drink quietly.

“You were an easy target, too, for a pillock like me. Didn’t have that many friends-“

“That was because they were all stuck-up death eaters.”

“I know that now. It didn’t matter then, though. I was a kid, though, and I thought it was just kids’ stuff-“

“You know, that time you exploded my cauldron in the final Potions exam, I cried for a whole week.”

He had the good sense to look guilty for a second before amusement lifted his cheeks.

“You did bat-bogey hex me for that.”

Your cheeks heated up at the memory, your fingers fiddling with the glass more.

“Which is entirely illegal.”

You smiled, pressed your lips together as you shook your head. It all seemed so long ago; so childish, now. You leant your elbows on the table, resting your chin on your interlocked fingers.

“It was a good shot, though,” you mused, enjoying the way his lips spread into a dazzling grin.

“A bloody good shot,” he laughed. He leant back slowly, tilting his head to the side and biting his top lip. The mood dropped again as he stared at you.

“What?”

“I’m really sorry.”

You wanted to take the piss, but something about his tone or the look in his eyes trapped your words in your throat. You just watched as he stood up, moving towards the sink.

“I made your life hell because I hated my own,” he said, pressing his hands to the counter, leaning forward. “It wasn’t fair. I’m not surprised you hated me, I deserved it.”

You stood up slowly, softly stepping toward him.

“I did hate you,” you said, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. “I hated you for so long it was all I could think about. Even here, I hated seeing your face.”

He turned to you, expression hard and tears sparkling in his eyes.

“I’m not sure if I do anymore.”

He turned around slowly to lean back on the counter as your hand slid down his arm. He caught it gently in his, surprising you.

“I want you to forgive me,” he whispered, staring at you so intensely a lump formed in your throat. You felt like you’d never even met this Sirius before.

“I-“

“I want to earn your forgiveness.”

You were at a loss for words as you looked at him, frozen in place. His hand was warm in your own and you couldn’t, for a moment, think about anything else. You bit your lip and nodded, stepping towards him gently.

“I’d like that.”

You leant into him, your side pressing against his, enjoying his warmth and the new feeling in your chest. You’d been in the war so long you forgot what real life felt like. You felt his hand hover around you nervously before it settled against your back, his hand resting on the counter next to you. And there, with the moonlight pouring in behind you, is where you stood till the sunrise peeked over the horizon; your hands clasped together with Sirius’ arm at your back, silent as you both felt a hope you’d not felt in a good few years.

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@loveisblindness​

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[legumelupin]

FINE

So with the el*ct*on happening today and the impending doom I feel, I’ve been listening to fine by Mike Shinoda (highly recommend the song and the artist, he’s my fave) on repeat and most of the words are the same verse to verse and chorus to chorus so I wrote this quick little fic to deter my attention and channel my energy into something that wasn’t news media. It’s kind of angsty but it’s a bit hopeful at the end. and everything will be fine for Harry Sirius and Remus. At least in my book it will be canon can suck it. 

There’s some mentions of dying but nothing explicit, everyone lives bc no one dies in my book. There’s also some questioning of reality so you have been warned!

Not edited or proofread!!! Please enjoy!! 

~

Tell all the children to lock those doors

I've seen the smoke in the sky before

Gotta be up on my feet when the morning comes

‘Cause this fight we can't ignore

“No, they’re too young to be inducted into the Order, they’re not of age!” Molly Weasley shrieked. “They’re children, this doesn’t concern them!”

“I very much have to disagree with you there, Molly,” Sirius bit out harshly and the woman had the grace to look affronted. Anyone who said that the warning signs of war weren’t there was stupid beyond comprehension. But anyone who said that it didn’t concern the kids was even stupider, especially when it came to Harry Potter.

“Well, they still don’t have to be present for meetings! They have school to worry about!” she retorted and Sirius rolled his eyes, his expression grim and annoyed. 

“I remember being in school and worrying that my best friends would be murdered over the summer. I remember being in school and hearing the cries of war and reading about the tragedies in the Prophet so pardon me if I think it’s a load of bollocks to think they aren’t thinking about what’s happening out there. Especially not the kids living here right now,” Sirius shot back, just barely holding in his snarl. 

The kitchen fell silent at that. The meeting for the Order had ended some time before leaving Sirius, Remus, Molly and Arthur Weasley, and Tonks for the night. It was a tense meeting to begin with seeing as Snape had shown up for his biweekly report. It was always tense when he came, knowing he was working for the other side and the unending feud between him and Sirius was enough to keep everyone on edge. 

“Well, I think I’ll turn in for the night,” Tonks’s voice sliced through silence and Sirius’s expression turned from glaring to slightly less glaring. “Gotta be up early for work and then I have some Order work in the evening so I want to be well-rested, you know?” she continued, sensing the easing tension. 

“I think I’ll turn in too,” Sirius grumbled, abruptly standing and pushing past Remus and Molly on his way out. Remus only watched him go, sighing as he heard the pounding of steps and the beginnings of Walburga Black’s screams before her son silenced them with ease. 

I feel a chill building up inside

Seeing the sweat filling up my eyes

Tell every friend, enemy in flesh and blood

To send out the battle cry

Sirius woke up the next morning colder than usual which was saying something considering it still felt like he’d never be warm again after escaping Azkaban. He groaned and reached his arm out, expecting to feel the warmth of Remus Lupin but finding the bed to be as cold and empty as he felt. 

Panic coursed through him. Where the fuck was Remus? Sirius didn’t remember him coming to bed the night before but he thought that perhaps he was just cleaning up Sirius’s mess (What else is new? he thought bitterly.) and had come up after he’d fallen asleep. But he wasn’t there. And Sirius was cold, no, he was freezing. His throat felt tight and his bed felt too hard. He couldn’t hear Buckbeak’s squawks or chirps and Remus wasn’t there. 

He tore off the blanket that was doing nothing and sprinted from the room, as far away as he could and down the stairs. He was expecting his mother to come out of the woodwork and smack him across the head for running in the house. He thought Regulus would be just around the corner waiting to spit at his feet and call him a blood traitor. He thought his father would be standing at the bottom of the steps, wand in hand and ready to cast the Cruciatius. 

But none of them came and Sirius was still running through the house and down the stairs. He no longer felt cold because he was sweating and he couldn’t catch his breath. 

He was running from Death Eaters and from Inferi. He was running for his life and he didn’t have his wand to defend himself. All he could think was Remus, James, Lily, Harry over and over again. He could’ve sworn he heard someone screaming his name and he knew he’d been found so it was only a matter of time before he was cornered and captured or killed. He had to run. 

“SIRIUS!” 

Remus’s voice broke through the haze and he skidded to a stop, the cold of the marble seeping back into his marbled feet. He was hot and cold all at the same time and he felt like he was in fifty different places at once all because Remus wasn’t there. But now he’s here and he’s holding onto Sirius and squeezing him tight and putting pressure on his over-sensitized body. 

“We have to-! We have- We have to go Moony! James and Lily!” he shouted, starting to struggle against Remus. 

“Sirius, stop moving! It’s 1995 and James and Lily are dead! We have to be worried about Harry! Sirius, Padfoot, my love, calm down please!” Remus’s voice pleaded, and what he was saying made perfect sense. He remembers breaking out of Azkaban and he remembers living in Grimmauld Place after giving it to Dumbledore to use for headquarters. Sirius stopped squirming and the pressure of Remus’s hold on him started to unravel the tension and the nerves he’d woken up with. 

Twenty minutes later and Remus had yet to let go but Sirius had turned and folded his arm around his Moony and gripped tightly as he sobbed. Remus didn’t have the heart to tell him it hadn’t even crossed midnight yet and he’d only just gone to bed a mere two hours ago. But Sirius was sobbing and mumbling about Harry and how they had to be ready and he how he felt useless and insane. Remus held him tighter. 

Fingers stretching out from nowhere

Reaching for my throat

They're hungry for my skin

Teeth wide smiling that they found me

Circling around me

Slowly closing in while you sing

Harry woke up frantically. He was gasping for breath because it felt like someone was squeezing his throat and there was cotton in his mouth. His skin was burning and he felt like there was someone in his room that wasn’t Ron. He knows he’s awake. He knows that’s not possible but he remembered the eerie portrait that stood tall in the room and he remembered hearing it snicker. Irrationally, he thought, Voldemort and his followers had found him finally. 

If he moved, they would see him. If he stayed still, he had no way of defending himself or getting away. And there was Ron still. He closed his eyes shut tight and tried to think through the situation rationally, the voice in the back of his head begging him to understand that no one besides Ron and him were in the room. No one else. 

He heard the high-pitched laughter that made his skin crawl and those grotesque white hands holding the yew wand, reaching out to touch him. He felt the touch everywhere, on his scar, on his throat, and the gash on his hand. Everything was burning. The jeers of the Death Eaters filled his ears and he sees their masks as they stood around him in a circle in the graveyard. They were all around him, waiting for him to move, waiting for their Master to do something to kill him.

Harry bolted from his bed.

The jeers sounded like they were following him and the laughter was too close to him for it to be comfortable. He left his wand by his bed and out of sight because he didn’t even want to look at it anymore with the looming hearing. But it wouldn’t matter anymore if he was dead. 

The jeers turned into shrieks that echoed throughout the house but he didn’t care as long as they were following him and everyone else was safe. He just wanted to be safe too. 

“It’s not real. It’s not real. It’s not real,” the rational part of his brain chanted and Harry didn’t even realize till that moment that he was crying. He slowed down a bit and threw caution to the wind to glance over his shoulder and see who was following him. 

No one was there.

His hearing stopped ringing and became sharper and he realized that the shrieks were actually Sirius’s mother and everything he thought he was feeling and seeing was not real. It was all because of that dream but it was the same dream he had almost every night in some variation. He never freaked out like that before. 

“Harry?” 

He looked towards the voice who called his name, his nerves flaring and he prepared himself to run again because he just couldn’t be sure at this point anymore. But it was just Professor Lupin. 

“I’m sorry!” he gasped and the werewolf gave him a concerned looked as he wordless flicked his wand towards the portrait and the shrieks were silenced. 

“Sorry about what?” Lupin asked kindly and Harry gulped. He was drenched in sweat. 

“Waking you,” he said before his brain even processed it. He was sorry for that sure, but he was also sorry about the portrait and about letting his old professor see him like this. 

Lupin waved him off. 

“I wasn’t sleeping,” he said before turning on his heel and gesturing for Harry to follow him. “Come with him,” he instructed and Harry obliged, wishing desperately to leave the laughter and white hands behind him. 

Everything is gonna be fine, fine

Everything is gonna be fine, fine, fine

Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine

Everything will be just fine

Everything will be just fine

Everything will be just fine

Everything will be just fine

Sirius was not eager to let Remus out of his sight but the pounding of feet and the reckless encouragement of his mother’s rage had him concerned as well. The cup of tea steaming in his hands kept him from feeling too cold and his bare feet resting on the old carpet kept from becoming too cold. Remus returned after only a minute or two. 

Harry was behind him. 

Remus steered the boy to sit next to his godfather and Sirius suddenly started to feel uncomfortable. He was supposed to be stronger than this and not let Harry know that he was weak and broken. It wasn’t supposed to be this way but yet Harry felt no qualms about it apparently as he insistently shifted closer to the Animagus. They weren’t exactly touching and Sirius could feel the kid’s apprehension about touching him so Sirius initiated it, hoping he wasn’t overstepping. 

He shifted his cup to one hand and threw an arm across Harry’s shoulders while pulling him closer to his side. He felt the tension start to ease out the boy’s body. Sirius felt a bit more relaxed as well. 

“Everything’s going to be fine,” he murmured, pressing his face gently into the chaos that was Harry’s hair and tried not to think of James and what he’s lost. 

Harry shuddered slightly but reveled in the comforting touch of his godfather and focused on the feeling. He left behind the remnants of his dream and leaned further into Sirius’s side, repeating quietly, “Everything’s going to be fine.”

Remus sat on the other side of Sirius placed a firm hand on his shoulder, leaning in to kiss his lover’s cheek softly. 

“Everything will be just fine,” he echoed. 

Neither of them felt any sort of sleepiness but everything was fine then and everything was going to be fine. 

Fine. 

[retroreaderr]

Hello! So... since harry potter is on your fandom list thing, is there any way a huge fan of yours could get a slightly angsty and incredibly fluffy oneshot or more if you get inspired with that precious bb Remus Lupin? It can be HP era or marauders era, up to you. Thanks so much!! :)

OK SO PLEASE SEND MORE HARRY POTTER STUFF BC REMUS IS MY BABE AND I LOVE HIM SM??? this is set in the marauders era but i am 1000% down to write some golden trio era stuff too !! also im like one of a solid 3 people in the fandom that doesnt subscribe to the whole andrew garfield as a faceclaim thing but hey mod gaston and i came up with alternates and we decided matthew gray gubler makes an adorable remus bc look at this babe ???? but hey yall can have ur hcs ill have mine  🕷️💋

“Hey James!” you flagged down the boy as he walked.

“____, what’s up?”

“Have you seen Rem? I wanted to ask him about some homework.”

“He’s, uh, out. Y’know,” he nervously scans the other students passing the two of you.

“Full moon tonight?” you ask keeping your voice low. He nods slightly.

“Listen, I promised I’d meet Pads before dinner -” he awkwardly motioned towards the Gryffindor Common Room.

“No, no it’s alright,” you turn to walk back down the staircase, “I’ll catch up with you later, yeah?”

“Sure.”

You took a seat in one of the chairs of the Common Room, glancing around at the decor.

“Never been in Gryffindor’s before…” you mumble to yourself.

You watch as three particular troublemakers made their way from the boy’s dormitory towards you.

Sirius was the first to notice you, “____? What are you doing -”

“Got the password a while ago from a friend. Listen, I wanted to ask you something.”

“We’re kinda busy, can it wait till tomorrow?”

“No.”

“Listen, I know you guys usually spend the night with him, but -”

“How do you know that?”

“I’m his friend too, you know,” you sigh, “He tells me these kinds of things. Anyways, I was thinking…What if I went tonight?”

“I’m all for the fact that you wanna help a friend, ____, but you can’t come with us, it’s too dangerous.”

“I actually wanted to go alone.”

They all stared at you as if you were mad.

“Have you lost your damn mind?”

“James, listen, I’ve got a plan and -”

“No! It’s way too dangerous. Listen, ____, it’s nothing against you, but…It’s just…Too dangerous.”

“If you won’t let me go I���ll march right down to Dumbledore’s office and tell him about your little map you all use.”

“You wouldn’t dare.”

“Try me.”

James sighed, Sirius simply glared at you, and Peter stood behind them, clueless as always.

“When you get hurt don’t say we didn’t warn you.”

You get up from your seat and make your way towards the exit, “I’ll be fine.”

“How do you even know about the map anyways?” James calls after you.

“I told you, he tells me these kinds of things,” you smirk.

Your footsteps echoed off of the stone walls as you traversed the small passageway. You could still hear the thump of the Whomping Willow above you, and had it not been for the soft glow of your wand, you would’ve been left in complete darkness. After a few minutes of walking, you found yourself confronted with a small door above you, it reminded you of the entrance to a cellar. You pushed your way through it, being sure it was closed once you were through.

The house you stood in was dusty and decrepit, just standing in the hall you felt your anxiety levels rise. You slowly took your first step, and the floor under you creaked. You heard a shuffling from upstairs, and your eyes shot towards the ceiling, scanning it for any other signs of life. After a small period of silence, you took another step, this time towards the nearby staircase.

You heard the shuffling again, then a small thunk.

“Rem?” you whispered, hoping to hear him answer.

He didn’t.

You climbed the steps slowly, trying to make minimal noise. Your bag felt heavy on your shoulder despite its light weight.

At the top of the steps, you were faced with a door, half open already.

You reached out and pushed it, and watched as it slowly creaked open.

You saw him sat in the corner, his head buried in his knees, his breath rigid.

“Remus.”

His head shot up at the sound of your voice.

“____, what are you doing here?” his face was overwhelmed with worry, making the dark circles under his eyes even more prominent.

“You’ve got to leave, you gotta go, it - It’s not safe, you know -”

“Does it hurt?”

He stopped speaking, though his expression was still overcome with concern.

“What?”

“Does it hurt?”

He doesn’t acknowledge your question for a moment until he slowly nods, dropping his head back to his knees.

“Yeah,” his voice was muffled.

“I’m sorry.”

“You’ve got to leave, though,” he suddenly stands, “You know it’s not safe -”

“I’m staying.”

He shakes his head as he approaches you, “Please, I don’t…” He finally is close enough to touch, and you watch your friend stare down at your hand - god how much he wanted to take it in his own, grab it and never let go - “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“You won’t.”

“I might,” he meets your eyes, “I can’t exactly control myself when…When it happens.”

You reach into your bag, pulling out a small object. You look at it before placing it in his hand.

“I know it’s your favorite.” He looks at the small candy bar before glancing back up at you, he had such pretty eyes, didn’t he? You never noticed how the green sometimes turned to a sort of blue -

“Thank you,” a small smile crossed his face, “But…You really do have to go.”

“I’m not leaving.”

“____-”

“At least let me stay for a little bit longer, then.”

He turned his head, looking out the window before glancing down at the chocolate, then to you.

“You can’t stay long.”

A smile spreads across your face.

“I don’t get how you stand me, really,” he leans his head back against the wall.

“Hm?”

“I mean, all I really am is a hassle, aren’t I? I just cause problems and I’m not worth your time, and -”

“Rem, you’re worth all the time in the world.”

“What I am is a monster.”

“What you are is kind, and cute, and shy and -”

“I don’t get why you like someone like me. Someone with my condition.”

“Because you aren’t defined by it. It’s a small part of a much bigger whole.”

“It’s a pretty big part of my life, if you ask me.”

“I’m not saying it’s not. I’m saying everything else about you, all that good, isn’t defined by that single negative. You’re too hard on yourself, Remus. You’re really a wonderful guy.”

“That’s not how I see it.”

“Well it’s how everyone else does. I’ll just have to teach you to see it my way, eh?” you nudge him playfully. He flashes a small smile again, and the sight makes your heart melt.

You sit in silence for a few minutes, just sitting, enjoying each other’s company. You almost forget why you’re there until suddenly you see him tense up.

“Rem?”

“You gotta go,” he breathes before letting out a grunt of pain and falling forward to the floor.

You felt your heart shatter at the sight of him in pain.

“Rem -” you reach out towards him, resting your hand on his shoulder. At your touch he jerks away.

“Go.”

“No.”

He’s shaking as he meets your eyes. His pupils dilate as his head lowers again, and he lets out a scream of pain. You wince at the noise, but stand your ground. His nails dig into the floor and his breath quivers as he bites hard on his bottom lip, drawing blood.

“Please,” his voice is weak.

“I want to stay.”

He jerks backwards, slamming against the wall. You look away as you hear the sickening snap of bone.

You slowly back towards the bed that sat in the corner of the room, unsure of what to do. He let out another groan of pain, though as it went on it became less human. You couldn’t bring yourself to look at him.

There were a few more moments filled with the sounds of both bone and flesh contorting, and you hold your breath as the room becomes silent. You hear a small whimper, and you slowly open your eyes, and turn to face him.

You’d expected much worse, honestly.

He almost looked cute - his fur was shaggy, and the same shade as his hair. His robes were tattered but still clung to his body.

You let out the breath you held.

His amber eyes snapped up towards you, and you were struck with fear.

“Rem?” you whisper.

The wolf’s eyes softened for a moment, and he took a step towards you. You smiled and stepped away from the bed, towards him, and extended a hand to reach for him. He stopped walking, and you barely saw his pupils dilate once more before he let out a growl and leapt towards you.

You stumbled backwards, onto the bed and frantically grabbed around for your wand. Your fingers felt nothing but the cold and worn quilt of the bed as you heard another bark and the patter of nails against the hardwood floor. You barely rolled out of the way before you felt the pressure of another creature on the bed besides you. You clambered onto the floor, searching furiously for your wand. You spotted it a foot away, next to your bag. Crawling towards it, you barely making contact before you heard the howl of your friend beside you.

If you could even call it your friend - you knew it wasn’t really him.

“Rem, please,” you whimper, finally grabbing hold of your wand. You then pull yourself to your feet using the wall as support.

The wolf simply growled aggressively, and bounded towards you. He swiped at your arm, barely catching it and tearing your colored robes in the process. The action made you fall backwards, though you didn’t process the pain right away.

Your breathing quickened as the animal slowly approached you again, teeth bared.

“Remus, I know you’re in there somewhere. I know…I know…”

The beast paid no attention to your pleas and leaped towards you again, but before he made contact with you, your arm flew in front of you, wand in hand. You weren’t sure which spell you’d casted, as a thousand different ones had flown through your mind all at once, but whichever it was sent the wolf flying back into the wall. It landed on the ground, whimpering. You immediately felt a pang of regret and sadness, you had just hurt your best friend.

You slowly approached him, placing a hand on his soft fur.

“Rem?”

The wolf responded slightly to the noise, trying to lift its head. It let out a deep huff before resting back on the ground.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry -” You placed your other hand onto its head, petting him. It seemed to lean into your touch, once again letting out a small whine.

Maybe it had hit its head too hard, or maybe you had somehow gotten through to him, but you knew then that you were safe. You sat down next to him, leaning against his torso, slowly stroking the fur of his neck. The scraps of robe that still stuck to him somehow only added to your comfort, reminding you of his true self.

You closed your eyes, and soon enough fell into a deep slumber, not even noticing that the wolf had adjusted its large body to somewhat wrap itself around you protectively.

It wasn’t the sunlight glaring through the window that woke you. It wasn’t even the cold. In fact, it was the lack of cold that had awoken you. You opened your eyes, still dazed from sleep. Your pillow rose and fell rhythmically, and you raised your head to look at it, confused.

Instead of the familiar four-poster you were used to sleeping in, you then realized that you lay on the hard-wood floor of a bedroom.

“Rem?” your voice was low and still veiled in slumber.

He lay below you, dark circles surrounding his eyes. Just the look of him made you exhausted, as though in some way you could share his burden of fatigue.

His arm is draped around your waist, and you make no attempt to move it as you lay back down against his chest, which is barely covered by his clothes.

The contact makes him shiver, and he opens his eyes, startled after being pulled from sleep.

He groans, taking a moment to asses the situation.

“____?” his voice is gravelly.

“Hm?” you snuggle closer to him, suddenly feeling the chill of the shack’s air.

“What are you…Oh god. Oh god, did I -”

“I’m fine, love.”

He stiffens at the name. You chuckle, then reach up to plant a kiss on his cheek.

“____, I don’t understand…”

“Hm?”

“Why you’d risk your life for…Someone like me.”

“Why wouldn’t I?”

“I…I just…”

You look up at him again and see a few stray strands of hair draped over his face. You grin, once again reaching up to kiss him, though this time you capture his lips, and your eyes flutter shut as you do so. Despite his exhaust, he eagerly kisses back, and after you part he sighs, turning his head to stare out the window.

“Have you got classes today?”

“No.”

“Can we stay a while longer?”

“Of course, Rem.”

You hear an almost inaudible, “Yes!” from him.

You giggle as you cuddle closer to him, and he wraps his other arm around you, “Dork.”

[delos-mio]

New ‘Do- A Sirius Black Blurb (SMUT)

Anonymous Asked: hi!! i was wondering if i could request a sirius x reader shot where the reader has a buzzcut? bc you know, i've got one and usually the reader has long hair!! (and i'm sorry if it's a little bit confusing, english is not my first language) 

Back to reality. Winter break had ended too soon. Classes were about to resume- something you were not entirely ready for. You were, however, ready to see your boyfriend again. Sirius Black had been your crush starting when you first laid eyes on him your first year, and ever since the two of you had been inseparable. He was your biggest fan and confidant, and you loved him with every ounce of your being. While you couldn’t help but feel anxious to see him again, you stomach was tying in knots for an entirely different reason. Over the break, you had made the decision to buzz your hair, opting for a much shorter look. You loved the way you looked with the new ‘do, and even more so, you loved how it made you feel. The only thing was you hadn’t told anyone, not even Lily or Sirius, that this was something you were even considering.

You sat on the edge of Sirius’ bed, waiting impatiently for him to kick through the old wooden door of the boy’s dormitory, ready to forget about having to be home and tell you a corny joke. Finally, you heard the click of the brass knob shifting open, and soon the impossibly handsome Sirius was standing before you. He dropped all his bags at once at his feet, a wide grin spreading across his face.

“And what do we have here?” he purred, taking long strides towards you.

“Hi, Pads,” you cooed, reflecting a similar smile back at him. He leaned down over you and tilted your chin up using one of his long, pale fingers. He kissed you deeply, his relief in seeing you again evident in how he moved his lips against yours. He broke away for a moment, grabbing both of your hands, making you rise and stand in front of him, cradled in his arms.

“I have to say, sweetheart, I am in love with this new look of yours,” he beamed, passing his hand over the short hairs on top of your head. A wave of comfort and relief washed over you at his words. You leaned into his touch and looked up into his grey eyes.

“Thank you, Pads. I was hoping you would,” you said, kissing him once again. He was still smiling as you passed your tongue along his bottom lip, asking for permission to enter. He happily obliged, humming softly into your mouth. Step by step, he walked you back to the bed, his hands firmly placed on your hips. The two of you fell back onto the soft blanket, Sirius long and lean frame hovering above you. He moved his kisses down from your lips to the soft skin below your jaw, delicately sucking and nipping along the way. His hands began making quick work of the buttons of your blouse. It felt like home to have him on you again, to be completely immersed in his scent and in his skin.

Sirius had just begun to remove your blouse when a familiar sound clicked behind you. Three boys appeared in the doorway- usually you could hear the rest of the Marauders before you could see them. For all the pranks they were able to pull off, they never were light footed.

“Oh for Merlin’s sake!” James cried out, dramatically turning his back to you. “You couldn’t wait five minutes into seeing each other to start snogging?”

“That’s a little funny coming from you, Prongs. Seem to remember catching you and Evans more than once…” Sirius called back, careful to shield your half naked boy from the boys.

“Hello, Y/N,” Remus chimed in, giving you a warm smile. You lifted the hand that wasn’t trying to cover yourself up to give him a small wave. “Your hair looks lovely,” he added.

“Thank you, Remus. That’s very kind of you,” you replied.

“What’d she do with her hair?” James asked, still not turning around.

“Well, if you turned and looked, I suppose you could find out,” Remus quipped before walking away from James, pulling his trunk to the foot of the far bed.

Tentatively, James slowly turned to face the couple once again. By now, you had adjusted to clothe your top half again. “It’s ok Prongs, everyone’s decent,” you mocked. He finally turned to face the both of you fully.

“Oh, Y/N! Really love the look. It suits you,” he exclaimed, walking over to you and patting the top of your head, much like a brother would. You put up your hands, playfully pushing his arms away from you while he continued to try and touch your hair.

“Now that we’ve all said hello, would you lot get lost?” Sirius begged. They all looked at one another and laughed, the irritation on Sirius’ face growing.

“C’mon, it’s nearly time for dinner,” Remus finally said, ending the residual giggles they all had. The boys filed out together, no doubt trying to scope the Great Hall for the prime seats. Peter shut the door behind them, and you finally found yourself alone with Sirius again.

“Are you sure you don’t want to go eat? We’ll have plenty of time to…” you began, but his lips were already all over you.

“We still have a minute before dinner. Feels like just enough time to…” he started, his hand reaching down between your legs. You let out a small gasp at his touch, something you had longed for for 3 long weeks. A smile danced across his face, forming that same shit eating grin you had come to love so much. “Sounds like you’ve missed me as much as I have you,” he added, moving two of his fingers into your entrance. The pressure was very much welcomed, a louder moan falling from your lips. He continued to pump his fingers in and out, rubbing the pad of his thumb over your clit. Your chest began to heave as his pace quickened, you release quickly approaching.

“Sirius, I’m gonna…” the words had no sooner left your mouth when you felt yourself peak. Every muscle in your body was on fire, every tension you held was gone. All that was left was you, Sirius, and the way he made you feel. You let out a long sigh before opening your eyes up to him. He ran his hand along the side of your face in a careful caress. A moment later, he pulled his fingers from you, lifting those that had just been in you up to your lips. You took them both between your lips, sucking your own flavor from them, never taking your eyes off his. His mouth fell open slightly at the sight in front of him, a small smirk creeping on his face.

“Your turn after dinner?” you teased, releasing his fingers with a pop.

“Can’t wait for it, doll.” He kissed you one more time before following behind you out of his room.