#BUT ALSO it happens so often it straight up feels like it's intentional

[cathodic-clairvoyant]

Oh hi there transfem discussing her experience in the trans community i just had a quick question about your post

What does tme mean?

Oh okay i see i understand, thank you.

What does transmisogyny mean?

Ah I see, I get it.

What's a trans woman?

Oof scary. One last question.

What's a woman?

Thank you for being my own personal google (not like you had anything better to do right?) and derailing the point of your post for my own personal education. I will now add nothing of value to this post in return. Bye bye!

[dunmeshistash]

How do you feel about Milsiril? Like what do you think of her interactions between the canaries, her goals, her intentions and morality? I keep seeing people with mixed feelings about her, some saying she's just toxic or morally grey or doing bad but with good intentions or that she's just a mentally ill and literally so much more, also with the comic about Otta calling Milsiril love for her children/Kabru as just love for a pet, I always saw people take it at face value and say yes, Milsiril did love them more as pets instead of children, did she take up raising/adopting non-elf children because she felt like none of them could ridicule her like the elves did because they didn't know what an elf was supposed to be like (and also because they were children) or did she inherently view them as less? I mean the canaries and I'm pretty sure almost all of the cast in dungeon meshi have some sort perspective on different races especially because how they were taught about them, i just think it was interesting to finally see someone interpret it as Otta just misinterpreting Milsiril, I'm just really interested in her, i think shes neat, sorry for the rant!

Ooh, well to preface this, I hadn't really realized Milsiril was such a controversial character before my last post, I kinda live under a rock. She's really not a character I had given much thought besides what I wrote there before it, but I can do my best to express what I have thought since, with sources for it. I'm not sure what order to go thru so I'll just go by manga appearances and then extras, this will probably be quite a long post

This is the first time she shows up in the manga (ch55) Kabru is wondering about what future they might have if the elves take them into custody because of the ancient magic, he thinks about Milsiril as a get out of jail card, and mentions "There's a chance they would make us become permanent resident of the elven lands." with the image of Milsiril holding him. I don't think that means she would be the one to not let them leave, since this would probably be an legal issue, and the fact Milsiril lives away from other Elves. It does set up that Milsiril is quite overprotective tho, with Kabru's reaction to her teary hug. (rest is under a cut)

The next time she shows up is in ch61 right after Kabru falls down the dungeon along with Mithrun, he faints and has this flashback

She's being her overbearing self treating Kabru's small injury as if its something you need to be in bed for, hand feeding him like he's a toddler, and when he insists he wants to learn how to fight and be strong like her, she hugs him revealing to us for the first time her arm scars, she's cleary in distress too, so you wonder "what has happened to her?"

It continues in the next pages, as she tells him to stay there, where it's safe and there's cake, and describes the bad things he might encounter. Until he tells her he will go with or without her help

Honestly this is a Kabru we don't see often, this is the version of him that is usually in thought bubbles, he's blowing out in frustation over being smothered and demanding straight up what he wants, instead of trying to manipulate Milsiril, very blunt for him. Milsiril seems to flip a switch into battle mode, when she decides to train him for real.

I really thought this was funny, the visual of these cuddly toys and this Mom that was being so soft just a second ago completely flipping into something menacing is very amusing to me. She says "I'll give you an exhaustive, thorough training in how to use a sword... until you finally decide that you're ready to give up." although it sounds cruel, it seems she really trained him as best she could to make sure he would survive the dungeon. If he couldn't take the training with her there was no way he would be able to take on the dungeon, but he could, so much so that he managed to make her let him go. I can see this being seen as her trying to prevent him from going but to me it seems more like some tough love from a traumatized war veteran in this case.

The last thoughts he has is admitting his Mom was right, "Not only were there plenty of traps, monsters, and malice... but there were times when I felt so hungry and cold that I couldn't stand it."

And he concludes with "I never once thought that I wanted to go back there. That room where I could eat all the cake that I wanted..." While I can understand the interpretation that he means he would rather go thru all this than go back, perhaps cause he hated it there, I think it's rather a statement to how committed he is to defeating the dungeon, the visuals show him in rubble vs him in a soft big bed, the rough reality he fought to be able to face and the comfyness of what his life could be. Plus is mirroring exactly what Milsiril said to him. Admitting she was right about the bad things but that he won't give up for the safe easy life he had.

After that visuals of Milsiril are used while Kabru tries to sus out Mithrun but she shows up again in Mithrun's backstory.

Here she's straight up called Gloomy, which wasn't really the version of her we saw so far, gotta remember this is also how Mithrun saw her and that she was called gloomy as a way of bullying. Kabru mostly cuts off her part in the story until the end, when she's the one to find Mithrun after he was eaten by the demon

She doesn't really care much for Mithrun as we see in some extras, and she was ready to mercy kill him, but she is also the one to spare his life. This could be seen as her thinking he can still be of use, and it's how it sounds with how Kabru tells the story, but I do think this was also a merciful act, Mithrun was in rehabilitation for 20 years after being saved, by the time he was actually useful for anything Milsiril had already left the canaries and adopted Kabru.

Now for extras... About Mithrun/The Canaries, Milsiril was cleary someone that hated the people around her. This is her extra in the Adventurer's Bible

Milsiril seems to be the type that hates "popular kids" so to say, her description says she was bullied by other elves for being so introverted so I believe she holds a grudge against people like Mithrun that seem to have succeeded where she failed. But realizing he was a twisted person like her seemed to make her feel more sympathetic towards him, that's why I think she really did act with mercy when she saves Mithrun, he's now someone she sees as similar to her, she sees he also suffered like her

Her decription also mentions she left the canaries specifically because she was disgusted with how the Utaya situation was dealt with. Yet it seems like she came back to help Mithrun with his rehabilitation once she quits.

There's an interpretation to be made that she did this only to get "revenge" on the demon since she just saw the destruction of Utaya, and that she's using him. On the other hand maybe she wants to help him find a motivation to live, she's no longer a canary and she has time to actually help him now. I don't know which one is the truth but it's not obviously something self-serving if you ask me. Especially in the context that right before this scene Milsiril admits she wishes they could have talked before.

My interpretation of her relationship with the canaries and other elves is that she's someone depressed that was mistreat for her 'quirky' side, the dolls are clearly one of the ways she used to cope with anxiety/depression but it only caused her to be bullied by her own kin, she's the daughter of an important family and it's shown in other extras, including one about Mithrun, that nobles often send out the kids they don't want around to become canaries. It's an easy way to get rid of someone undesirable and I think it was the case for Milsiril. (Pattadol even assumes her parents love her less than her sisters for sending her to join the canaries).

No wonder than that now that she's finally free from the canaries she chose to seek her own happiness away from the society she felt she could never fit into, she clearly likes to take care of children too, I think it's mean to assume she only likes them because she feels superior to them when there's no indication that this is the case.

And I don't think it's a coincidence she's so overprotective of Kabru after Utaya, it's literally the tragedy that was the breaking point for her, and he's a surviving small child from that tragedy, Milsiril cares about Kabru and wanted him to have a comfortable safe life after everything he went thru...

This ended up getting way too long so I'll make second part tomorrow about the rest of the extras and Kabru, and some other things I've seen said about Milsiril, but to answer the questions...

I don't think she treats her children as pets, Otta is just salty she was called out for dating like Leo Dicaprio.

Every single dungeon meshi character can be called morally grey because they all have flaws that in our world can be considered unforgivable, but they don't live in our world. To me Milsiril is doing her best in the context she lives in.

Who even is neurotypical in dungeon meshi, Milsiril is yet another flavour of a neurodivergent traumatized character among so many.

I believe she thought of the other canaries, especially Mithrun, as the same type of people that were cruel to her, probably because some of them really were, but that she generalized it to the point she thinks of all of them as bad by default. You can only get hurt so many times before you assume everyone will hurt you.

Part 2

[iceunhie]

JEALOUSY IS A FICKLE THING...

ft. al-haitham, ayato, wriothesley, lyney

warnings : gender neutral, jealousy, mentions of suggestive content on wriothesley's part, established relationship, you are wriothesley's spouse. erm slight dark content but it's okay it isn't implied, we need more men like them in the world

mhie's notes : i used the wheel randomizer for this i hope everyone's proud i write for anyone other than scara ijbol

al-haitham’s jealousy is muted; quiet and hardly noticeable, often non-existent unless you have the fortune of knowing him deeply enough (kaveh). make no mistake, al-haitham trusts you, he simply doesn’t trust those that make moves on you when he was clearly right there. when some bothersome person disrupts you both on a simple date, which is already a clear red warning sign, for the acting grand sage hardly has any time to spare; naturally, his reaction would be to put a complete stop to any and all the flirty remarks towards you with a flat tone.

it’s not the content of the words that make the person making a move on you leave, but the slight menacing edge to al-haitham’s voice, a sign that if they do intend to cross the line more than necessary, he won’t just be using his words.

most would back off after a simple talking-to, but in the case that person doesn’t cease their advance, you can best bet your lover is steering you away immediately. dendro archon forbid they touch you or make you uncomfortable in the slightest, though, or else al-haitham has no qualms contacting the matra or taking matters in his own hands, but this scenario hardly happens often, given his seamless ability to get to the heart of the conflict and uprooting it so that no problems arise.

he’d most likely opt to diffuse the situation by straight-up telling any admirer of yours that you were taken and most definitely not up for grabs.

“they are my lover. since you’re clearly crossing their preferred boundaries and seem ignorant of the fact, i’d advise you to stop making them feel any more uncomfortable.”

though it’s truly difficult to get al-haitham jealous due to the excellent control of his emotions, tempered by his rational thinking, the most you can see of it is how he seems to stay closer to you than usual and the simple but firm link of your fingers as you both continue on your days.

(but if you notice him putting a subtle hand on your waist as you both walk, do try not to comment on it, will you?)

for ayato… er, why have you even bothered? if one even has the nerve to flirt and court the yashiro commissioner’s own partner, then that’d make you either not inazuman, or simply an idiot. it’s no exaggeration, but a simple fact. ayato is by no means a jealous man, but he doesn’t like seeing those not worthy of you hover around you with such impure and unwelcome intentions, so he tells ayaka and thoma, but really, he just wants to call the shuumatsuban on any who dares to even look at you the wrong way.

he bides his time well, approaching your admirer with a genial smile and elegant composure and indulges in small talk, but there’s a chill in the air and the looming feeling of doom as well as his smile that seems to see through any and all actions. its terrifying, really.

it also doesn’t help that he’d be extremely touchy in these moments, seeking to link arms with you and yes, even going as far as to rest his head on your shoulder, a clear indication of exactly how close you two really are. after you introduce him as your lover, at this point, it’s likely that the person making a move on you would back off and run away immediately, for how could they even dare to compete when it’s the yashiro commissioner himself who they’re facing?

he’d gloat silently afterwards in the comfort of his own quarters though, the sight of your admirer cowering like a dog getting cornered by a wolf, ah, truly satisfying. though thoma would eventually tell him to tone down the ‘borderline evil chuckling.’

“my love, have you been well? hm? the change of topic? ah, well, as the saying goes; ‘out of sight, out of mind,’ yes? no need to think about those that’ll only bother you. now, come here, there’s a new hotpot ingredient i’d like you to try… haha, relax, it isn’t dango this time.”

another one with a terrifying reputation and terrifying influence to make even the most daring of your admirers quake in their boots. wriothesley is amused - he gets that there’s hardly any window for romance in such a dreary place like the fortress, but even going as far as to court the duke of meropide’s own spouse? really funny, honestly.

but after the initial wave of amusement, he does take this time to immediately show off his status as your husband, showing off the matching wedding rings and even having the well-deserved nerve to smile and continue on rambling about your marriage, which is clearly a very happy one, judging by the way he presses a lingering kiss to your cheek while maintaining clear eye contact towards the person.

you’d have to wrangle in your husband when you both sleep tonight though, because wriothesley has made it his personal mission for any and all those who wish to covet you to show them that you were his spouse, and no other held your heart or your affections. when morning rises the next day, you promptly leave with a very visible bruise on your neck, and an especially relaxed and happy duke at your heels. most would look away in embarrassment, including your admirers, so that’s that.

“hah, that'll show any of those who have way too much time on their hands to lay their hands off my spouse. what? too brutal? well, sweetheart, what did you expect?”

oh my god lyney. haiz this enigmatic magician… magicians are all about masterfully weaving lies and illusions in order to perform to the top standard, and it's no surprise lyney also uses such methods when dealing with any and all annoyances in your relationship. he can be perfectly fine on the outside, but he has always been good with keeping his more sinister and less than socially acceptable side in check.

in fact, chances are he’d probably charm away your admirer with his own tricks; a wink their way and honeyed suave words to ease their love-struck heart and in seconds your admirer is up and away, promising to leave.

this often gets you disgruntled and in awe of his ‘performance,’ but lyney will always stave off your complaints or questions with a rainbow rose or some other fancy trick of his up his sleeve and guide you away, person courting you forgotten. all according to plan….

in all honesty, lyney isn't as composed about it as he seems. lynette can see it at a glance after you two have separated after the encounter. it shows in the way he broods silently for some time, preferring to divert the attention of such a sore subject away and going about endlessly about what new gifts he might give you or what seat was best for viewing, read: what seat was closest to him, for that matter. her brother was truly such a pain in the neck, and lynette does thank you for making him happy, but really, at this rate, you'd drive him insane by how much sway you hold over him.

“and just a trick of the light here and-! ta-da! a rainbow rose, symbolizing just how much i do adore you, way more than any other! …so don't try to pay attention to them, okay? after all, you've already caught this magician’s eye and heart~”

he can still be pouty and extremely clingy after the encounter though, which carries on whenever he performs any of his shows, where lyney always, always makes one of his acts feature you, be it a simple guess your card trick or his favorite, the one act where he leads you to land up on stage and give him a kiss based on the card’s instructions, it's all to show just how wrong anyone else other than him would make you as elated as lyney does.

@ MHIIEEE 2023 : do not copy, repost or plagiarize my work.

btw can you tell i had fun writing for al-haitham despite the fact that i have never even been remotely interested in him in the entirety of the game

[twinkling-moonlillie]

Hawks Headcanons

A/N: I am currently obsessed with Hawks (if you couldn't tell) and writing for him is fun. I made these headcanons while procrastinating on my midterm paper a few days ago-

Warnings: Some NSFW content; MDNI. Some angst too

Starting things off with an angsty bang, Hawks has a bad habit of plucking his feathers when he is stressed out. It’s never too often and it’s never to a critical extent, but it does occur. Birds often do this as a form of coping with negative feelings, so perhaps he does this after a brutal mission. 

Like many other people, I firmly believe that Keigo has a thing for shiny or interesting looking objects. Again, it’s not to an obsessive extent, but he does have a good eye for pretty trinkets. Especially ones he thinks will look good on you. 

I don’t think Hawks is a good cook. There, I said it. This man barely has time for himself, do you really think he has time to devote to cooking? Do you really think that the Commission taught him to cook? Fuck no. He sticks to quick take out purely out of necessity. 

They say that the quickest way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, and this is absolutely true with Keigo. He would love the little lunches and dinners you make for him while he is at work! He gobbles it up like a turkey. He swears that your food is the best thing he has ever had; he literally moans when the aroma hits his nostrils. 

I forget which fic I read this from (I will link if I find it), but I adore the headcanon of Hawk’s taking rut suppressant pills. I just think it makes so much sense since it aligns with his work-centric life and his lack of a wife (we aren’t talking about when you are married to him, obviously). They are probably similar to birth control pills where they stop the rut from happening 5% of the time. 

Even without his rut happening, Keigo still has a huge breeding kink. Can you blame him though? He just thinks that you'll look gorgeous with his cum leaking out of your pretty pussy. 

*whispers* he also has the equipment to match

He has definitely accidentally run into a window from imagining you with a cute lil baby bump. 

He can get a little whiny and needy about wanting to devour your pussy. He will straight up beg you on his hands and knees. Please say yes to him. 

The songs Angel with a Shotgun and Mr Blue Sky fit him so well. Fight me on this. 

Also the song Hey Look Ma, I made it

I just imagine happy birb listening to Mr. Blue Sky after meeting you.

Intentional or not, his wings flap and rustle during sex. 

On the topic of his wings, I don’t think they are as sensitive as we all wish they were. It’s not like he’s gonna start moaning and whimpering when random fans touch his wings (he canonical doesn’t) HOWEVER, it does feel nice when you massage and gently comb your fingertips through them. I’m thinking that it’s similar to hair?? Or maybe his wings are ticklish?? But only in the right context?? 

You are the only person he really trusts to take care of his wings

Keigo loves holding you in his arms and taking you on night flights. The stars always seem brighter when they are reflected in your eyes (at least, Keigo thinks so…). You even have your own set of aviator goggles to wear during these dates.

One of his favorite things is when he DOESN’T have morning patrol and can snuggle you until at least 10 in the morning. Although it may be longer because his sleep debt is so huge. There is just something so satisfying and peaceful with having you close enough to hear your heartbeat. 

His biggest dream is being able to have a family with you in a quaint little house. His life, your life…they aren’t constantly in danger and he can sleep in with you, make you breakfast (it’s only a little burnt), wrap his wings around you. 

Keigo is extremely possessive of, not only you, but the life you created together. He is very sensitive towards things that threaten the small slice of normalcy he has, eliciting a sense of hypervigilance and territorialism. 

His mental state isn’t the best from the culmination of trauma he experiences, leading him to commit psychic cannibalism on himself. He represses all of these negative feelings in order to perform to the best of his ability and be the good lap dog for the Hero Commission. 

Needs therapy.

It’s established that he has some form of echolocation through his feathers. So…hear me out…just to make sure you are safe 24/7, Keigo gives you one of his smaller feathers. I’m not going to rant because I might make this into a small oneshot/drabble later

[rey-jake-therapist]

Sauron, Galadriel and touch

Each time we see Sauron hug someone, touch their arms or their hair, put his arms around their shoulders etc. it's never gratuitous. He always has an agenda. He does that to manipulate them in a way or another, or to steal them something. He isn't a touchy type of guy, really.. I think he probably dislikes it, most of the time.

In Elendil's case, he probably didn't just pickpocket him but used some magic trick as well, because there's no way Elendil wouldn't have noticed. Not to mention that the dagger literally disappeared from Halbrand's hands up until he gave it back to Galadriel. Anyway, he still hugged Elendil to distract him from what was happening. There was not a bit of sincerity in that move.

Later, he put his hand on the smith's shoulder in an attempt to convince him to take him at his service. It was meant to be a reassuring gesture : "trust me bro, I'm the best !"

In this case, it was slightly different :

Sauron did that to steal Tamar's guild crest, so the intention was similar to when he hugged Elendil. But this time, he didn't do it discreetly. We know now that even as Halbrand (so not in full possession of the powers he had as Annatar), he was able to make his blood look red; so he could have easily projected the image of the guild's crest on Tamar's tunique, to make him think it was still there.

But see, Tamar offended him. He recalled him that Galadriel would probably never want him (though not because he was a "low man", but because he was the very evil she sought to destroy), and Sauron didn't like that. So what he did was provoking Tamar by stealing his crest in plain sight, so Tamar would follow him and give him the excuse he waited for, to do that :

We can also count that as touching, I guess ? But tell me again that Sauron wasn't interested in Galadriel romantically... It makes total sense for him to lose his shit because some man implied he wasn't good enough for her, right...

(I'll later write another meta about the few times that Sauron loses control. It doesn't happen often, but when it does, it's hot terrifying).

In season 2, I think we saw him touch Mirdania twice, and maybe once for Celebrimbor ? Though I can't find a gif of Sauron touching him except when he grabbed him at the end, so I'm not sure about that.

I've already discussed several times, including today, how Mirdania was a stand-in for Galadriel, so I won't go back to that here. Sauron doesn't feel any affection for Mirdania: wether he touches her hair and hand to manipulate her, or because she reminds him of Galadriel, or most likely, for both, it is, again, not gratuitous and not genuine.

And as for being touched... Oh boy, he doesn't like that at all. His reaction is most of the time him pulling a disgusted "how dare you touching me, you miserable worm ?" face.

This scene in particular was hilarious in this regard. He was very upset by Celebrimbor's refusal to forge rings for men, and Celebrimbor unwillingly added to the offence by giving him a condescending pat on the arm. Sauron probably had a hard time refraining the urge to murder Celebrimbor on the spot, here.

The Galadriel Case

Her case is special, as usual. Until episode 8, Sauron never touches her without her consent : after they arrive in Numenor, he invites it, but doesn't force it on her. it's supposed to be a "friendly" handshake symbolizing peace and a mean to give her Finrod's dagger back, but, well, hmm...

It's just straight out flirting. The way he looks straight into her eyes while pulling her to him, his weird conception of personal space... I can't NOT tag @apoloadonisandnarcissus 's thread about the Freudian symbolism in Haladriel interactions... It's worth reading. There was nothing friendly/platonic in his behavior, but, again... no unnecessary touching here.

Galadriel remains equally guarded towards him, even after she spends time with him and considers him as a "friend". As Sauron in episode 3, she only invites it, on the boat that takes them to the Southlands.

Even when she gives him back his pouch, in the forge, she does it in a way that her fingers barely touch his.

When she finds him wounded, she touches him where he's wounded, to check how serious it is. She could take his hand to comfort him, but.... Nope.

And yet, she's not usually that guarded with her friends, those with whom she shares a (truly) platonic relationship with, as we can see with Elrond and Arondir.

It's definitely not because she doesn't trust Halbrand/Sauron. She does, or she wouldn't be that heartbroken over him in season 2. No, I think she keeps him at arm's length because what she feels for him is not platonic at all, and she wants to keep her feelings in check. Keeping her distance with him (physically) is the way for her to do that, or so she thinks.

Now, back to Sauron. While during all season 1 he was never touchy with Galadriel, in episode 8, he suddenly is.

Not only that but he's also very flirtatious, like... more than usual.

Galadriel seems surprised with this unsolicited touching, and iffy, because she doesn't trust him anymore. She has just asked one of her fellow Elves to look in the catacombs of Eregion for everything they had about the Southlands and their royal lineage; after she heard Celebrimbor talk about "power over flesh" and seen Sauron enthusiastically offer his aid to the smith, she starts suspecting that Halbrand may be not who he claims to be.

Coincidence ? I think not. Even if she remained discreet, Sauron probably felt that something was off. He's very observant, and he knows her mind. If she changed of attitude with him, if she seemed even a little bit wary of him, there's no doubt he noticed it.

He certainly planned to tell her the truth about him very soon, at that point, but he also wants the rings to be forged so he could show her what they'd do with them. So this, imho, is Sauron buying time. He knows she's attracted to him, he may even know she's in love with him... I think he's trying to breach her defenses, here.

Did he succeed, even for the few weeks that separated this scene from the Sauron revelation ? That, we don't know. I'd say probably not, because just before the Elf brought her the records she asked for, she doesn't look like someone who trusts him again.

But then she's still in denial about him even after he admits he isn't the king of the Southlands, going as far as claiming he convinced Miriel to go help the Southlands, while it was her idea entirely... So who knows what happened during these three weeks. It's also possible she didn't suspect him to be Sauron, of all people. And anyways, she loves him. She definitely hoped till he revealed himself that he had a good explanation for everything.

Yesterday I published this post very late, and it's only this morning that I realized I omitted to mention a couple of other very important touches... Stupid me.

How could I forget the chin grab ?

We're in full "unsolicited touching" territory here. Personal boundaries be damned ! The chin grab has several connotations here : it's coded as romantic, but it's also an act of dominance and control, though there's no brutality at all in his gesture. Sauron wants Galadriel to look at him, aka to face the truth : he's still the man she loves, but he's also the monster she hates. They both coexist, in him, hence why the claims that "Halbrand never existed" or "Galadriel loved Halbrand but doesn't love Sauron" are both nonsenses and a complete misunderstanding of the season 1 finals. Galadriel knows who he is in this scene, and yet she's tempted.

The act of grabbing the chin is in itself controlling/dominating, but there's also tenderness : he's gentle, he caresses her cheek almost shyly; he wants her trust for Halbrand back, not her fear of Sauron. He wants to show her that she's loved, but you can feel that if she asked him to take his hand off her, he would back off.

Finally, this post ends with Sauron taking Galadriel's hands into his, with her holding Finrod's dagger.

You know, what he did with Morgoth's crown in season 2, binding her to him through a forced blood oath ? He wanted to do almost exactly that in season 1 already, and that's what this scene implies. Except in this scenario, Galadriel would have been ok with it: it would haven't been a metaphorical rape, but the closest to a consensual sex scene we'd have gotten in this show, if they had followed this route.

I'm not saying I wanted this, just to be clear: Galadriel was tempted to join Sauron in this scene, but it would have been a major breach to the LOTR lore if she had. "Touching the darkness", in Finrod's and Galadriel's minds, was never about embracing it wholeheartedly. It was precisely where Galadriel and Sauron's visions diverge. She knows it will never be the way. She knows she'd end up being a tyrant if she succombed to the temptation, and that's why she rejected it, and Sauron with it.

[loud-mouth-loser]

not him - 2

summary: marc has had his eye on you for a while now. he's seen your interactions with steven and has held himself back from taking you for himself, but what happens after he finally makes a move?

pairing: marc spector x reader

rating: more angst

cw: pining (really intense pining), jealousy, miscommunication, mentions of past kiss.

wc: 2.7k

part one

[author's note is at the end of the chapter to avoid chapter spoilers!]

---

Marc’s POV

It’s your laugh, that soothing, sweet sound – so inviting that he wants it to soak right into his skin. When he hears it, he holds it close to him, making sure he doesn’t miss a single note. Letting it replay in his head until the next time he sees you. 

Marc has never considered himself a funny guy – or hadn’t for a while. He never had a reason to joke around, a reason to smile or laugh, but then there was you.

So now he tries his best to incite that laughter, if only for a mere taste of your sweetness.

He’s equally addicted to that view. The sight of soft lips parting into a bright smile, your shoulders shaking with each stilted breath, your eyes glistening with unerupted joy; a bliss that he’s craved to know since the day his brother passed. And it’s genuine. 

Everything about you is genuine. 

Then, when you come down from the laughter, you look up at him with a ghost of a giggle still thrumming in the air, still tugging at the corner of your mouth. He can’t help but stare back, wishing this moment could last forever. 

It’s just you and him, nursing sweating bottles of beer on his ratty old couch, the TV running quietly in the background as you unconsciously lean closer as the night progresses. He plunges into that gaze wrapped in innocent moments and admiration, a look that whispers unspoken sentiments and unattainable promises. 

You are looking at him, yes, but you also see him. 

He feels it wrap around him, a warmth that reminds him he’s worth being around, that you want to be there with him. It sparks a revelation within himself that if he could make you laugh, or even look at him the way you do, maybe…being him is ok. 

And maybe he wants to stay.   

But then there’s that smile – no, not your usual amused grin or the bashful one he attempts to lure out whenever he gains enough confidence to tell you how pretty you look – the cherry-red lie that’s specially curated for Steven. 

It’s a mask you use to preserve your friendship, to convince the oblivious man that you’re happy for him even when your side of the bond is crumbling, struggling to stand up straight. 

The first time Marc saw that smile was from the reflection in his apartment. 

He usually doesn’t stir or interfere while Steven is fronting, unless there’s an emergency of course, but there was a pang of energy that woke him up. And now he’s wondering if it was you. 

He watched broodily from the fish tank; jaw clenched tight as Steven sat in front of you holding your hands in his. He knows he shouldn’t be jealous, but he can’t help the ire burning low in his chest as he watches you position yourself closer to Steven, eager to hear what he has to say. 

Marc’s eyes drift from your hopeful face to your joined hands. 

He wonders how that feels: to hold your smaller hands in his, to squeeze them just so as to remind him that you’re real and there with him, to feel you squeeze back and run the soft pads of your fingers over his callouses. 

Your softness smoothing over his jagged ends. 

You like it – the touch. Steven’s touch.

He can see it. 

But you’ve always liked it when Steven gives you physical affection, even if it was all platonic. You’d lean into him, practically craving it, eagerly presenting yourself to his hand. And he’d give it to you, merely enjoying the closeness you offer him – nothing more. 

Your eyes are wide, and you lean in, listening intently, but at the same time, you’re not hearing a thing. Marc can see that you’re lost in Steven, a feeling he’s often had around you. 

The giddy comfort you felt from his touch instantly dissolves as he continues to speak, “And we kissed…” You lean back from him, quickly covering your reaction with a blank expression. Marc can see right through it. 

Needless to say, Marc also isn’t too happy hearing about Steven’s escapades with his estranged wife; He’s always been protective of Layla, but now more than ever. Layla had once been his rock, keeping him grounded as life attempted to sweep him away. She was the only person he trusted for a while, the only one he could lean on and hold whenever he wanted to give up. 

Because of that, he left. 

Too much of a great thing can only lead to a horrible ending. 

Right?

He convinced himself he did it because he didn’t want her to get involved in his life of violence, of his life as an avatar. She was always getting dragged into business that wasn’t hers, used as bait to lure him out of the shadows, and Khonshu was starting to hint at making her his next avatar. 

That is a reason, a sound reason, but he can admit now that that wasn’t the main reason. At some point, Marc realized could never love her the way she wanted him to.

When he first felt it, he couldn’t shake it. He was forced to face it until it utterly consumed his thoughts, until he could taste it hanging from each word, turning every whisper into a sour void. He felt unworthy of her affections and ashamed that he continued to take and take, drinking in every last drop of warmth she could supply. Anything to numb that looming darkness that threatens to drag him under the bloody viscous waves of his past. 

And all he could give in return was surface-level words and cool kisses. Guilt dripped from his embrace and soaked against her soft skin, and he knew he had to pull away. 

Steven, the lovesick puppy, was completely oblivious to what he was inviting her back into: danger, violence, and an unspoken truth.

Marc should be jealous that his wife and alter are continuing to fraternize behind his back, or angry that Steven went against his wishes and welcomed her back into his life, but he’s not. Mostly, he’s nervous to face what he wasn’t strong enough to do, scared that he’ll continue to push it away until it swallows him whole. 

Then there’s you.

Your eyes are glassy and empty as you nod robotically as Steven rambles, lost in his own words. “...the most brilliant woman I’ve ever met.” Your hands attempt to retreat from his and Steven doesn’t notice, but he does. 

The audacity of Steven to talk about this stuff to your face astounds him. How can a man who shares his body be so clueless? So stupid to not see what’s right in front of him, offering herself for any ounce of attention he shows.

“I love her.” 

And there he sees your heart shatter. 

“That’s great, Steven. I’m so happy for you.”

—

All he can do is stare back, eyes taking in your swollen lips and wrinkled clothes. Your bodies breathe together, catching a breath as you process what just happened. There’s a voice in the back of his head urging him to pull you back in, to drink the ambrosia of your lips until you melt against him and beg for more, while he still has the chance. But he knows that if he were to move the spell would be broken.

And he was right.

When the stare breaks so does the moment. You clumsily slip off of his lap and sit back on your side of the couch. His hand hovers over your figure as you move away from him, a ghost of the touch he once had on you, desperate to stop you from leaving him. Fingers grip painfully into his palms as they curl into a fist of frustration and loss.

You both sit there for a second. It’s easier to think when your bodies are pressed against each other. When you aren’t tempted to lean in for one more kiss.

This wasn’t supposed to happen, he wasn’t supposed to get this far. 

Ever since meeting you, he’s tried his best to keep his distance, to watch you pine for Steven from afar as he harbored his own longing for you. Marc never believed he deserved it, you, always taking three steps back before he could touch a perfect thing. Before he could ruin what was already breaking. 

He’s supposed to be detached from real life, from anything outside of his work. He’s convinced himself that he was okay with letting you go, even promising Steven he would give him complete control of the body once he was done with Khonshu. But now he doesn’t think he can. He can’t leave you.

Marc finally builds the courage to look over at you. 

Your eyes are closed, not squeezed shut, just closed. The soft glow of the TV pools over your body. You could probably feel his eyes on you so you begin to talk. 

“I’m confused.”

“Confused.” He repeats with a soft nod, letting the word settle in his mind.

He doesn’t know what else to say. Of course, you’re confused, this whole night has been a series of bold actions and heated words. One second you’re having a pity party at your crush’s flat and the next you’re crawling on top of his alter. You still haven’t had time to really go through your emotions.

“You like me…” You finally look at him, brows furrowed as you navigate through your thoughts.

“I do.”

“And I like Steven…” He frowns at that but nods. You both know it, that’s how you ended up here in the first place. “..And Steven likes Layla, but you’re still…married?”

He sighs, “It’s been over for months, sweetheart.”

“Well, aren’t we a group of lovers?” You joke. 

Neither one of you laughs.

Deep brown eyes meet yours, “I meant what I said. Steven is blind if he can’t see what’s right in front of him.”

“I-I don’t know where to go from here.”

He places his hand on top of yours. And you let him. 

“Stay…” He didn’t mean to say it out loud, didn’t mean to say anything at all, but when he’s with you, he feels out of control. 

He sees the little furrow of your brows as you digest the implications of his suggestion. Stay and forget about the consequences. Stay and pretend it's just us. Stay and let me love you.  

“Marc –” 

He interrupts you before you can finish your thought. 

“For tonight.” He just isn’t sure he’d be able to take what you were about to say. If you could stay like this, even for one more night, just you and him and the memory of that embrace, he thinks, maybe he’ll be okay. Even if you leave him in the morning. Even if you run away from what could have been. “It’ll be easier to understand after a night of rest.” 

You stare solemnly at the edge of the couch, “Yeah.” For a moment he holds some hope that he’ll be able to hold you tonight and sleep like everything is right in the world. But then you gently slip your hand out from under his. “I should probably go though.” His palm burns. You push yourself off the couch in search of your discarded jacket and shoes.

“You can crash here,” He feels desperate. You’re slipping from his hands and he’s frantically grasping at the evading warmth. “It’s late and there’s more than enough space in this flat.” He wants to reach out again but he’s afraid you’ll reject his touch this time.

“Steven has work tomorrow morning.” You say sheepishly as you slip an arm into your jacket. Of course, you’d know Steven’s schedule. “He needs to wake up early…and it would be awkward to find me on the couch.” As if he’d let you sleep anywhere but in his arms.

“Ok, but I should walk you home.”

You tug at the bottom of your coat, flattening it onto your body. “It’s fine,” You look back at him, hovering by the door, “Really, I’m fine.” He doesn’t miss how you’ve switched from talking about the situation to yourself.

He murmurs your name, not knowing what he can say to make you stay.

“Marc.” You echo back, voice soft and – tired. “I guess I’ll see you later.” 

—

“Whot was that?”

Steven didn’t wake up for work the next day. In fact, he didn’t ‘wake up’ at all. Marc did. He woke up around 1 pm with a throbbing headache and a loud, berating British man yelling at him from the inside out. 

After you left, he sat there in silence and moped, hoping you’d stop in the middle of your commute home and realize you wanted to come back to him. You didn’t. Once he received the ‘got home safe.’ text from you, he decided to drink whatever was left in the fridge before passing out. He’s regretting it now.

“Steven, please.” He presses a hand over his forehead, trying to soothe the ache as he blearily stares at the mess of empty bottles from last night. “Not right now.”

“Not right now?! You snogged my best friend!”

“Oh, come on.” Marc tugs on a shirt before making his way to the bathroom. In the small cheap mirror, Steven stares right back at him, a disgruntled glare burning right into his skin, “You weren’t going to do it.” That makes him blush. 

“If–If I had known…”

Marc tries to ignore him, splashing some cool water on his face to wake himself up. How can Steven even complain about it when – “Wait – how did you even find out?”

“I saw her…” He says uneasily, “pulling away.”

Marc groans into the towel as he dries off, “You were there? How much did you see?” 

“It’s not like I planned for it! I’m not a perve or anything, I was just…pushed to the front all of a sudden!” Shit, he must’ve gotten too excited. “I tried to leave as soon as I got there.”

“For the record, I wasn’t planning on any of that happening either.” 

“Why would you do it then? You’re going to confuse her.”

“Confuse her? Steven,” He shakes his head, “She’s obviously in love with you and you still wave whatever weird relationship you have with my wife in her face.”

“Well, hold on a minute–”

“Go back to sleep, Steven.” Marc walks over to the couch, longingly staring at the spot he was in last night. “I gotta clean up.”

–

Your POV

Your hands nervously fiddle with your phone, opening, closing, and reopening your messaging app. You stare at the text you sent last night:

‘got home safe.’

You actually got home 15 minutes before sending the text, but he doesn’t need to know it took you that long to type out 3 words. It’s crazy, you tell yourself, how many texts you drafted, edited, and deleted before hitting send. What if he doesn’t want to hear from you again? What if Steven gets it instead of him? What if he thinks you’re being clingy just because you shared one kiss? One, blissful, enamoring, show-stopping, kiss?

He hasn’t answered it yet. 

Read 1:56 am

Which is fine. You’re fine. It’s only 3 pm and Steven is probably still at work, so he hasn’t had a chance to text you back. It’s fine.

You hate the way your heart skips a beat when a typing bubble comes up. Fuck, did he see your pathetic attempts to text him earlier? You quickly exit the app, not wanting to expose yourself if he sends the text and you immediately ‘read’ it. The phone vibrates abruptly in your hand as a banner drops from the top of your screen.

‘Hey 🤠! –’ Already from the emoji use you can tell it’s Steven, ‘–Wanna meet up for tea ~4:30? Let’s go t…’

You let out a sigh. You know you shouldn’t feel disappointed. Steven is your best friend and you love hanging out with him, but there’s this anticipating giddiness when you think about Marc. The feeling you used to have about Steven…

It’s crazy how one kiss can flip your life so completely. Not just that, but how fast you went from mourning the chance of one relationship to melting into the development of another.

You open up the conversation. You really should talk to him. 

‘okay 🫡 i’ll meet you there'

---

a/n: sorry this took so long (literal months). i had half of this written for a while and was so sure i'd get it done within a few weeks, but then I let it sit in my drive until I picked it up TODAY and finished it lmao.

so most of this chapter delves into marc's thoughts before and during what happened in the first part, some of steven's thoughts + the aftermath of the kiss. i know a lot of ppl wanted a confrontation between the reader and steven, but I didn't want to rush into it when we don't even know how marc really feels ab the reader :3

i thought it would be interesting if steven found out about the kiss through marc (and I also didn't know how to write out the reader admitting it to him) bc that's how marc found out ab steven breaking the readers heart. i also wanted to explore how the reader is grappling with her feelings towards the two guys!

i def want to write more, but I can't promise when the next part will be out. I'm a notoriously inconsistent and SLOW writer, so bare with me. thank you for all the support on my angsty journey and I hope you enjoyed this chapter <3

[oh-koenig-my-koenig]

meeting him at the pub

(cw: age gap)

I don’t know how it happened, how I ended up chatting to the tall metalhead at the pub. But I was meeting my friends there like every other Wednesday and when I got drinks from the bar, a dark, friendly voice piped up. “Hey, nice shirt.” My head whips to the side, looking for the person who gave me the compliment.

Right there at the table, sitting alone, a huge, tall guy with long dark hair. Tattoos adorned the big strong arms distracting from his bandshirt, I think it’s from Dark Tranquility. The drawings span to his hands ending at the knuckles, that moved as he grabbed the bottle of beer standing right in front of him.

My eyes close in on his face, a ruggedly handsome one. A nose that seems to have been broken at least twice. Lips formed into a friendly smile. Serious eyes looking straight at me, eyes that had seen some shit, but the laugh lines around them speak of a man who rather likes to laugh. He also looks a bit older than me.

I almost stumble over my own feet, halting for a moment to look which shirt I’m wearing today. It’s my Death shirt, the one with the Symbolic Album art. I look back up at him, smiling. “Thanks!” I continue my trip to the bar, a pep in my step.

When I walk back with the drinks in my hand, I shoot another friendly look in his direction. One that he answers with a nod and tipping his beer in my direction. And I totally blush at the little friendly gesture. I sit down with my friends handing them their beers, but I can’t help my eyes finding their way back to him every so often, to see what he’s doing.

He’s just chilling alone, at his table, drinking his beer, looking at the TV where some kind of soccer game was being shown, playing with his phone from time to time. It is so fucking tiny in his huge ass hands. And half the time I look in his direction, his gaze is already on me. Which is making me nervous. Not because it’s creepy or anything in that sense, but because he’s attractive. Oh my, ruggedly handsome, seeming like a gentle giant, while the way he’s sitting and observing everything around him is telling a different story.

“Just go fucking talk to him.” My friend sitting to my right grins at me. I shrug. “I don’t know.” They roll their eyes. “Just do it, you little chickenshit.” I throw up my hands. “Fine, fine, okay.” I snatch up my beer and hesitatingly make my way to his table.

He’s already looking at me, sitting up straight, as I approach him and ask with a shy smile on my face: “Can I sit here?” I point at the stool across from him. He seems a bit surprised, but he nods. “Sure, take a seat.”

I sit down and then a moment of silence falls over us where we just look at each other. The corner of his mouth is tilted up, a half-smirk making his face even more handsome, a few strands of hair falling over his left eye and cheek. He seems a little bit tense and I suddenly feel a little bit self-conscious. We just look at each other. And I can’t stop looking at him.

“So, you like Death too, huh?”, I ask him, and then I hear how that sounded. “The band, I mean.”, I clarify laughing. He joins in, a dark manly chuckle falling from his lips, and I can see his shoulders drop down a bit. Seeming a little more relaxed.

“I do.”, he answers. “Actually, one of my favourite bands.” His voice is a bit higher than I would have anticipated from such a big guy, he has a nice timbre and some kind of accent when speaking English, that he’s trying to mask.

“Understandably so.”, I say, going on a rant about my favourite bands. He just looks at me, stunlocked. His mouth slightly open. His eyes scanning my face, dropping down every so often. I don’t stop talking and he listens, nodding along.

“I also like Lorna Shore a lot, do you know them?”, I want to know. He shakes his head, still intently listening while only speaking every so often. “They’re a symphonic deathcore band, and my god, their music just blows you away.” He chuckles again. “And they’re in town next week, but I don’t have anybody to go to the concert with me.”, I say, turning down the corners of my mouth.

“I could accompany you.”, he chimes in which shuts me up. A friendly offer. But the way he’s looking at me is making it feel like so much more.

“Really? You would do that?”, I ask surprised.

He shrugs one of his shoulders, looking to his fingers that fiddle with the label on the beer bottle. “Yeah sure, I can be your company for that evening.”

I close my mouth and think about it for a moment. “Of course, that would be… very nice of you.” Great, I’m so eloquent when it comes to flirting with men. Especially older, tall metalheads. But the way he’s still fidgeting with the beer bottle, I think he’s having a hard time as well. Which makes his offer so much more surprising. But I’m not mad at it. Not at fucking all.

I clear my throat. “Maybe I can get the tickets and you can get the drinks?”, I suggest. I wouldn’t want this to seem like I wanted to mooch off him.

He hesitates for a bit, but then nods. “Sure.” I nod as well and drink some of my beer. So that’s that, huh?

“So, what do you do? For a living?”, I ask him. He halts for a second, and I add: “You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to, of course.” I tilt my head and push my cheek into my propped-up hand.

A smile forms on his lips, as he looks to the side for just a moment, but his eyes find their way back to me. “You’re a nosy one, huh?” which makes me hide my face in my hands looking at him through my splayed fingers, but he only laughs at my gesture.

“I’m actually a soldier, a mercenary. I’m currently on leave.”, he explains. My eyes widen at his words.

“Really? Damn okay.” That explains the aura around him that I couldn't pinpoint before. “So like, what’s your specialty or however this is called in the military?”, I ask, still being nosy.

His lips curl into a confident smile, his whole demeanor changing a bit. “I’m an insertion specialist.” And the way he says that makes my skin tingle, my jaw dropping down a bit. Because the tone in his voice makes me think about a certain kind of insertion. The ‘drop your clothes, get naked together’-kind.

He laughs again as he sees the expression on my face. “Get your mind out the gutter.”, he jokes.

“Huh, I didn’t say anything.”, I defend myself, weakly, holding up my hands in defense. He pulls up his eyebrows, donning a knowing smile and leaning back.

“M-hm.”, he says and his fingers wander to his lips, stroking over them absent-mindedly. “I specialize in breaking down doors and getting people out of whatever situation they’re caught in.” How he says it makes me smile, because he says it so non-chalantly, but I can see the pride behind his words.

A little silence falls over us again, but instead of being uncomfortable we just sit in it and look at each other. He drags his hand through his hair, his fingers threading through the brown strands. And I’m so normal about this. My god, why does he have to be so attractive?

“How old are you?”, he asks me, his eyes searching my face like I’d have it written on there. The first question he asked me this evening.

“I’m 25. And you?”, I return the question. He winces a bit, but he answers: “I’m 41.” I nod and sip on my beer. Well, I already assumed that he’s older than me, so I’m not really surprised by the age gap.

“I’m old enough to be your dad.”, he says and takes a sip from his beer. My eyes are glued to his lips, the way the bottle rests against them. Then he swallows and I follow the motion as the liquid flows down his throat.

I arch a brow. “No, you’re not.”

He tilts his head to his side, a little smile forming on his lips. “Well, maybe if I started early, I could be.” His eyes dart to me, for just a moment.

The other brow joins the one already sitting at my hairline. “Did you start early?”, I ask him.

His smile gets wider while he slowly shakes his head. “No.” He takes another sip and leans back a bit.

“So, not actually old enough to be my dad.”, I conclude the conversation, a grin turning up the corners of my mouth. “I’m gonna get another drink, you want one as well?”

He looks at me, his eyes boring into me. I see the little twinkle in them, but he shakes his head. “I’m sorry, I got to get home.”, he finally says, the expression on his face turning apologetic.

I hide my disappointment behind a charming smile. “Okay, no worries.”, I tell him.

He leans forward, coming a little bit closer, and I stand my ground, even as his scent hits my nostrils, and I have to damp down the excitement flooding my veins. He’s smirking at me now and raises his hand until his finger makes contact with my nose. He just booped my nose. “Tell you what though. Let’s exchange numbers and then we’ll see if you’re still up to going to a concert with me when you’re sober.”

I laugh a bit and pull out my phone from my pocket. “Okay, deal.” But his words also make me think. “Don’t you trust my judgement?”, I ask him as I hand him the device which looks ridiculously small in his hands.

He grins while tapping on the screen. “I do, but I don’t trust myself when I stare into the face of a beautiful woman.” He looks at me again and hands me back the phone, getting up. And he gets taller and taller and taller. I mean, I saw that he’s freaking huge when he was sitting down. But my god, he’s more than a foot taller than me. I have to put my head back to be able to look up at him.

“A beautiful woman, huh?”, I repeat his words back to him, ignoring the way this sentiment makes me feel.

“Aye.”, he says leaning down a bit. “Good night then.” He presses a small, almost chaste kiss onto the top of my head, while at the same time grabbing his leatherjacket. He puts the worn piece of clothing on and heads in the direction of the door.

I look down and see the new contact in my phone. His number, but instead of his name the little crown emoji sits on the top of the page. “Wait, what’s your name?”, I yell after him.

He turns around again, the long hair whipping over his shoulder, grazing over the worn leather. A grin lights up his face. “König, you know, like ‘king’ in German.”, he explains. He raises his hand again and waves goodbye, then he’s out the door.

He’s gone, but he’s still on my mind the rest of the evening while spending time at the pub, on my way home, as I’m getting ready to finally sleep. Especially the little forehead kiss lives in my mind rent-free.

When I wake up again in the morning, I contemplate what to do while I get myself a coffee. Finally, I gather my courage and shoot him a text.

metalhead!König has me in a chokehold, so this was veeeery self-indulgent. i hope you still like it <3more to come soon, because i can't wait to go to a concert with him :')

part 2 or more stuff in the Masterlist

[xo-hoon]

an eye for an eye — p.sh

pairing: park sunghoon x fem!reader

genre: revenge, angst, smut, fluff

synopsis: Sunghoon nurtured a profound animosity towards his childhood friend, Lee Heeseung, blaming him for his sister's death. To Sunghoon, his sister was the only person who had genuinely loved him, making Heeseung's perceived betrayal unforgivable. This deep resentment sparked an intense desire for revenge, driving Sunghoon to extreme measures to achieve it. But to what extent would he go to find satisfaction in his vengeance against Lee Heeseung? Would his plans unfold smoothly, or would everything take an unexpected turn, throwing his schemes into something he didn’t expect.

word count: 4.2k

warnings: swearing, kidnapping (kinda), possessive hoon, mentions of death, fake marriage, depression, fist fighting, minor bleeding, hoon has detachment issues. (typographical errors)

an eye for an eye: last part - masterlist

Sunghoon woke up with the feeling of his wife’s figure laying on his chest. You really looked angelic while sleeping.

He couldn’t help but to stroke your cheek and feel the softness of your lips. He wished to see this sight every morning for the rest of his life. That way, even if it was cloudy outside, he’d always wake up with his own brand of sunshine. He wrapped you in his arms and basked in your warmth. He vowed to never let you slip away from him.

He would do everything to tie you to him forever. And for that to happen, he needed to take action.

He gave you a tender kiss on the forehead before getting up to take a shower and prepare himself for the day. Upon leaving the room, he went straight to the garden where he suspected his father was.

“Dad,” He called. From his newspaper, her father glanced up at him.

“Good morning, son. Sit down. Do you need anything?” Sunghoon sat down in front of him.

“I’m thinking of taking my wife on a belated honeymoon trip.”

His forehead creased. “Where are you planning on going?”

“Japan. I also wanted to visit Grandma and Grandpa.” They had never been close to him, but they knew your family. “I’d be grateful if your secretary could arrange everything for me and my wife.”

He folded the newspaper and placed it on the table. “Why does this seem sudden? What about the farm? I’m getting old, Sunghoon. I can’t manage everything anymore.”

“We have good people here, Dad. They are all hardworking and trustworthy. My manager could take over, so I don’t think you have anything to worry about.” His father fell silent for a moment, deep in thought over what he had just said. “Alright, I understand. When are you going back home?”

Sunghoon shrugged. “I don’t know. As long as possible?” His father’s lips twitched and his eyes filled with profound curiosity.

“Why do I feel like you’re planning to live there? Is there a problem, Sunghoon?”

Yes, there is. Sunghoon laughed. “Nothing, Dad. Anyway, we can’t stay there for long. I just wanted a little vacation with my wife.” He leaned back and looked at his father intently.

“Fine. But make sure to call here often. I’ll get my secretary to arrange everything. I’ll also have him come here to get both your passports.”

“Okay, Dad. Thank you.” He said and stood up after bidding farewell. Sunghoon breathed a sigh of relief. His father agreed. And hopefully, everything would go as smoothly as this.

—

You’ve noticed that your husband has been exceptionally busy these past few days. You already knew he was hard working, workaholic, even. But it’s quite different these days as if he’s constantly chasing after something. Today, he left with his father because they said they had someone to talk to.

You glanced at the oven timer, signaling that the cream cheese garlic bread you made is cooked. Once you checked and saw that they were golden brown, you grabbed the mittens to take the baking tray out.

“Wow, that looks delicious, Y/n.” Aunt Chul said as she just entered the kitchen. You smiled at her.

“I won’t be modest, Auntie. It is really delicious.” You giggled, placing the tray on the table. She chuckled.

“Really? Let me have a taste then.”

“Sure! But let’s wait for it to cool down for a bit,” You said as you removed the mittens and took the tongs to carefully transfer the bread onto the basket lined with wax paper.

“Oh! I’ll make us something to drink, Dear. What would you like?”

“I’ll have some green tea, please.” You requested.

“Sure, just a moment.” She began boiling the water and fetched the cups while you were arranging the bread in the basket, making it look presentable. Shortly after, you and the woman enjoyed the bread and tea together.

“This is so good, Dear!” Aunt Chul happily commented after the first bite. You nodded in agreement.

“Yes, it really is. I wonder who made it?”

The woman chuckled lightly. “No joke, Dear. It really is delicious. The cream cheese garlic bread I’ve had before didn’t taste like this. Sunghoon is really lucky to have someone like you, Dear. I hope you know that.” You were speechless at her words.

“I remember, Sohyun and Sunghoon used to love eating you baked good back then. They were the ones tasting and critiquing your creations.” Your smile faded as you recalled the past.

“I felt that they grew tired of tasting my breads back then. Especially Sunghoon.” You whispered softly.

“Oh, Dear! I doubt that,” The woman said with a chuckle and shook he head. “Didn’t Sunghoon always insist on tasting even the burnt ones?”

Yes, you could vividly remember that. Every batch you baked, whether perfectly made or not, Sunghoon always tasted them. He would praise them if they were delicious and cheer you on to do better next time if they weren’t. He was always there for you, ready to make you smile and feel good. He was your everything backthen. While you couldn’t do anything for him. You sighed.

“Yes, he’s a good guy…” You said softly just above whisper.

“What was that, dear?” The elderly woman asked. You glanced at her and gave a small smile.

“Nothing, Auntie.”

She took another bite of the bread and savored it like a child. “This is really delicious, Dear. I’ll miss this when you’re in Japan.”

You paused mid-bite upon hearing her words. “What? Japan?” You asked, confused.

“Yes, Japan. Didn’t Sunghoon tell you? You’re leaving tomorrow to go to Japan. Your husband has already arranged for your things to be packed,” She explained. Your jaw might have dropped at Aunt Chul’s news. Japan? Leaving? Tomorrow? You had no idea of what she was talking about. You felt your phone vibrating in your pocket.

“Heeseung…” You murmured as you saw the registered number. Quickly excusing yourself from Aunt Chul, you hurried upstairs to your room to answer the call.

“Heeseung?”

“What’s this I hear about you and Sunghoon leaving?”

He asked sternly. You paced back and forth in the room, feeling like a cat about to give birth, anxious and unsettled.

“I don’t know! Aunt Chul just mentioned it to me just now. I had no idea. Sunghoon hasn’t said anything about us leaving.”

You stopped in your tracks and pulled at your hair, feeling frustrated. What was he thinking?

“He’s freaking insane! You need to come home now, Y/n. We need to talk about this,”

He insisted.

“But—”

“If you won’t come here, I’ll come there.”

He said sharply. You took a deep breath.

“Okay, I’ll be there in an hour.”

You quickly left the mansion, being careful not to be seen by anyone. You also didn’t ask the driver to take you to avoid anyone from knowing where you were going. Upon arriving at your house, Heeseung form immediately greeted you. His face was serious.

“Let’s talk inside.” He said, leading the way.

—

Sunghoon and his father was greeted by Aunt Chul once they entered the mansion. “Would you like to two like to have snacks or rest first?” She asked.

“I’ll rest for a bit. I’ll come down later for dinner,” Mr. Park replied, heading up to his room.

“And you, son?” The woman turned to him. Sunghoon smiled at her.

“I’ll go rest first, Auntie.”

“Is that so? Y/n baked cream cheese garlic bread,” She added making him chuckle at her obvious teasing.

“I’ll go see her first, Auntie,” He replied.

“Oh, yes. That’s right.” She quickly agreed. “Go on, she’s in your room. She went up there after we ate earlier.” She gently nudged him.

“Hurry up now.” He chuckled at the woman’s gesture. He was near the stairs when she called him.

“I’m glad you hear your laughter again, son.” She said sincerely. He smiled back at her.

“Me too, Auntie.”

He went up to their room. However. It was dark inside, and you weren’t there. The windows were open, and the curtains swayed gently with the breeze. He wondered and checked the bathroom as well, but you weren’t there either. He went downstairs to find Aunt Chul.

“Auntie, have you seen Y/n?” He asked. She furrowed her brow.

“Isn’t she in your room?” He shook his head. “No.”

“Well, I just came from the garden, she wasn’t there either. Did you check the study? Other rooms?”

“Not yet,” He sighed. “Wait, maybe she went to her brother? Your wife had someone calling her from her phone earlier.”

Your phone? He recalled Heeseung visiting the bakery. He felt knot in his stomach. The fear he felt when he woke up and found the woman was not by his side returned.

“I’ll be out for a while,” He said and rushed to his car, got in, and drove away.

—

“I have talked to a friend who’s willing to lend us the money we need. If you’re still worried about that bastard’s check, I’ll go top the bank tomorrow and—”

“It’s not that simple, Hee,” You whispered. You were both on the sofa in your living room, having a serious conversation. You felt a chill at what your brother wanted to happen.

“What do you mean?” You sighed and looked straight at him. “Do you think Sunghoon would just agree to that?” He wasn’t able to respond. “He wouldn’t, Heeseung.”

Heeseung ran his fingers through his hair in frustration and leaned back on the sofa. “Then I think it would be better if you took some time away from him,” He suggested.

You shook your head. “I think it would only make things worse if I did that.”

“Then what do you think would work?” You couldn’t answer. None of your plans had worked. Reconciling the father and son. Gradually avoiding your husband. None of it happened.

“Look, y/n. I just want you safe. I don’t want you to get hurt, that’s why I’m doing this,” He said, holding your hand. “I’ll face Sunghoon myself. I’m the reason for all of this.”

You gave him a sad smile. “Liar.” He paused. “We both know who’s really at fault for all of this.”

He tightened his grip on your hand.“Y/n, I don’t want you thinking like that.”

You sighed. “Let me handle this, Hee. Let me leaver with Sunghoon to Japan, and there I’ll figure some things out.”

His eyes narrowed and he let go of your hand. “Are you seriously telling me that you’re really going with him?”

You looked down. “Honestly, I’m still hesitant about it. I’ll try to convince him later not to leave. But if he insists, maybe it’s better if I go with him for now.” You pleaded with him to understand. “I just can’t leave him.”

He stood up abruptly, clenching his fists.

“No.” It was a firm command. “You stay out of this. I’ll confront that piece of shit right now, and I’ll resolve this mess with him.”

“I’m here, Heeseung,” You and your brother almost simultaneously turned towards a cold and low voice. You gaped as you saw Sunghoon there.

He looked at you. “We’re going home, Y/n.” He was about to reach out to you but your brother’s large figure blocked his way as he stood up.

“Over my dead body.” You grabbed his arm.

“Hee, don’t start.”

“He was the one who started all of this!” Heeseung exclaimed. “And for what? Revenge? Only children would think of—” You gasped as Sunghoon lunged forward and delivered a punch at your brother’s face.

Heeseung slumped to the floor due to the impact. Your eyes widen as you saw Heeseung’s lip split open. You rushed to him and hurriedly wiped the blood from the corner of his lips. He stood up, his eyes glaring with retaliation for the punch he received from Sunghoon.

“Stop it!” You shouted, trying to intervene to break them up. When they didn’t budge, you raised your voice louder. “Enough!”

That seemed to snap them out of it, reminding them of your presence. Both men were panting heavily, and you could feel the tension thick in the air around them. You faced your brother. “We’re leaving. I’m going with him.”

He grabbed your arm. “No!”

“Please,” Your voice trembled in plea. Reluctantly, he let go and gave Sunghoon a sharp look. You called a helper and instructed them to bring a first aid kit. “Treat your wounds, Hee. Take care.” You hugged him.

You felt your husband tug on you. “Let’s go,” He whispered. He guided you out of the house towards his car. Heeseung didn’t follow, which you were thankful for. Upon reaching the car, Sunghoon spoke.

“Don’t try to run away from me like that.” He looked at you intently. He seemed to claim all the good looks in the world because even in dim light, he still looked godly… whit a bruised lip. You reached for his face.

“You have a bruise. Let’s hurry home so we can treat that,” You said.

He grasped your hand. “Answer me. Tell me you won’t run away from me.” His intense gaze made you feel like you were burning. You nodded slightly in response.

“Say it, damn it!”

“Sunghoon, I...” He held both sides of your face and gently forced you to meet his eyes.

“Is it really that hard? To be tied to me? To stay with me and remain by my side?” Your lips parted as you saw the desperation on Sunghoon’s face, as if his life depended on you staying.

“I promise I won’t hurt you. I won’t. I can’t”

“But you’re hurting my brother. And because of that, you’re also hurting me.” You don’t have the right to complain. You deserved the pain. But your brother?

He let go and sniffed the air. “Okay. You want me to stop hating on your brother? I can do that. I’ll do it for you.” He looked at you with a longing look. “You also said I should forgive my father? Fine, I’ll do that too.” You couldn’t speak. What was he trying to do to you? He reached out and held your palm, then clasped your hands.

“If I do all that, will you stay by my side? Will you promise not to leave me? Will you stay with me forever?”

“I realized that I was blinded by anger. Sohyun wouldn’t want me to blame the man she loved forever.” Joy enveloped your heart. It felt so good to hear your husband’s words. You never expected that he would be willing to do everything just to keep you by his side. That he’s finally ready to set his anger aside. But there’s one thing he didn’t know. And Sunghoon would hate you more if you keep it hidden from him much longer. You should have confessed earlier.

How will he believe you now? Even if you tell him that you love him…

Your eyes stung with tears. You shook your head. “No… You don’t understand.”

Sunghoon lifted your face with a finger, wiping your tear that traced a path down your cheek. “What do I not understand?” He asked, his voice soft yet urgent. “What is it, Y/n?”

You could only shake your head, your tears falling relentlessly. Sunghoon enveloped you in a warm embrace, offering you solace in the cold, dark night.

“Please, Y/n,” He murmured, his voice trembling with emotions. “Just promise me that you won’t run away. That we’ll always be together. That’s all I want to hear. Please.”

You continued to sob into his chest. Truth be told, you wanted the same thing—to be together forever, to be happy in each other’s arms. But that was impossible. It was never going to happen. You sniffled and gathered all your courage. Gently, you pushed him away from you. You shut your eyes tightly before looking straight into his eyes.

“It wasn’t my brother’s fault that Sohyun died. It was mine.” Your throat ached, and the words seemed to resist coming out. “It was only right that I pay for what I did. So it’s not fair that you blamed Heeseung for what happened…”

You saw Sunghoon’s expression change. “What are you talking about, y/n?” This isn’t your fault.”

You stood firm You knew you had to stick to the truth, no matter how painful. “It was all my idea. It was my decision that led to Sohyun’s death. I can’t let Heeseung suffer for something he didn’t do.”

A mixed of shock and confusion crossed Sunghoon’s face. “It wasn’t Heeseung’s fault that your sister is no longer with us. It was my fault. The anniversary surprise, the candle lit dinner—” You gulped, and tears streamed down your cheeks again. “Those were all my idea.” You roughly wiped away the tears, but no matter what you did, they kept falling.

“If I hadn’t suggested all that, Sohyun would still be here. You wouldn’t be left alone. Everything would be okay.” Your chest tightened as you confessed everything to him. “Sunghoon… I… I’m sorry. I’m really sorry.”

You could barely breathe from crying, and through it all, Sunghoon just stood there in front of you. This must be it. He must be hating you now and cursing you to death. You wouldn’t be surprised if he suddenly told you to rot in hell. You turned away to head back to your house. You had your answers. You didn’t need to leave because Sunghoon wouldn’t want you anywhere with him anymore.

You calmed yourself and dried the tears to see your way, but a tight hug from behind stopped you in your tracks. The embrace was so firm, you could barely breathe. You cried even harder. Sunghoon turned you around and you buried your face in his chest.

‘I’m so sorry. I never thought it would all end in an accident.”

He comforted you. “Heeseung’s surprise for my sister was your idea. That’s all it was. You and Heeseung didn’t mean her any harm. Both of you just wanted to make her happy.” You pulled away slightly and looked up at him. There wasn’t a trace of hatred on his face.

“Aren’t you going to yell at me? Sohyun died because of me.” At that, you started crying again. He sighed and tried to calm you down.

“Weren’t you listening? To be honest, ever since you came back to in to my life, my anger had gradually disappeared. I think I used what happened as an excuse to keep you by my side. I could never hate you.”

“But—” He silenced you with a kiss.

“I’m sure my sister is happy up there. I know that because I felt like she’s watching over me from there. Sohyun never wanted me to live a miserable life.” He gently stroked your hair.

“She once told me that I should stop shutting myself from the world. And when she died, it felt like my anger was the only thing keeping me alive. Until I saw you again. You were so bright that I wanted to put everything behind me. And I remembered that my sister told me I always needed to stay in the light.” He carefully caressed your cheek. After a very long time, you saw the man you loved once again.

“And you are my light, Y/n. you’re my very own brand of sunshine. The moment I saw you again, I felt alive. You complete the happy days I once had.”

If this was a dream, you wished to be a princess who had slept for a long time. And if possible, you hoped never to wake up. If this was real, why did it seem so unbelievable? You had expected a mad beast with eyes full of hate, not a handsome prince with eyes filled with love.

Oh God. Is this real?

“Yes, Y/n. This is real.” You hadn’t realized that you voiced your question out.

“But, Sunghoon. I know how much Sohyun’s death affected you. I don’t want you to hide that from me just because you promised not to hurt me. Whatever makes you feel better—”

“It’s true that my sister’s death nearly killed me. But you…” He paused, searching for the right words.

“The thought of another person I love frightened the hell out of me. If I lose you, I know I won’t be able survive.”

You embraced him tightly. “I won’t leave you.”

“Do you really accept me as your husband, Y/n? Are you ready to be with me for always? Will you love me too?” He looked deep into your eyes.

You wanted to say yes. You wanted to tell him that you already loved him. That you have loved him for a long time. Your gaze shifted towards your house, where you saw your brother watching the both of you. He nodded, as if giving you the encouragement to do what you truly wanted. Slowly, a smile spread across your face. You looked up to Sunghoon, who was gazing at you with complete love. Tears pooled in your eyes again, but this time, they were tears of joy.

“I love you, Park Sunghoon.” You finally managed to say. “I’ve always loved you. Even when our paths separated, that love never faded. I still love you.” Sunghoon let put a breath, his eyes closing briefly.

He hugged you tight and kissed the top of your head. “Thank you. Thank you for loving me.”

You returned the warm embrace to your husband. “I still feel guilty about Sohyun,” you sighed.

“Stop it,” He scolded you gently. “She loves us, and I know she wants us to be happy. There’s nothing to worry about now, baby.” Right. Sohyun had been a kind and loving sister top Sunghoon. She treated you like a sibling too. She genuinely loved your brother. She wouldn’t want anyone of you to be sad.

Under the moonlight, you promised to love the man you promised to be with for a lifetime with all your heart. You would give him the light he needed and all the love you could offer. You would be together for an eternity. And it would start now.

“I love you so much. Y/n.” You heard him whisper. You tightened your hug on Sunghoon even more.

“I love you.”

It was supposed to be rainy afternoon according to the weather report last night. But the weather seemed to be cooperating with them because not a single dark cloud marred the sky. You wondered how it would feel to live in a world where there was no sadness and pain; where only the warmth of love and happiness enveloped you.

Then you realized that in this world, one need all those sufferings to appreciate the beauty of life. You should face your fears and endure trials to become a better person. You smiled as you looked back and saw your husband leaning against the tree where you were taking shelter.

Sunghoon is a great example of someone consumed by darkness, yet learning to return to the colorful world. Well, all of you went through some tough times, but you believed it was Sunghoon who suffered the most. You approached him, locking eyes. You sucked in your breath. He still looked dark and powerful, but that was just because of his striking physical appearance. The dark aura that used to surround him was gone.

“We need to get going, you know?” You reminded with a smile.

He held your waist and pulled you closer to him. “I know, baby. I was just doing some reminiscing.”

“Like when you tripped here while we were chasing after Sohyun and Heeseung?” you teased him. The corners of his lips lifted in to a smile.

“Very funny.” You grinned and planted a quick kiss on his lips.

“So… Shall we go to Sohyun’s grave?” Before, his expression darkened whenever he remembered his sister, not it didn’t. He maintained a light demeanor. It was Sohyun’s death anniversary, and you planned to visit with your brother, Heeseung. The feud between the two men had been resolved.

“Yeah, I think we should go now. I want to catch Heeseung being dramatic.”

You wrinkled your nose. “How mean.” Sunghoon just grinned and kissed you quickly on the lips. You both started walking towards his car.

“You know what? My visits to my sister will be different now,” He said.

“What do you mean?”

“Before, whenever I would visit her, I always said I would seek revenge on those responsible for her loss.” He tightened his grip on your hand. “But today would be different because you’re with me, and Heeseung and I are okay. I used to visit her with a heavy heart, but this time, I would face her with a smile.”

“And she must be smiling back at you,” You said happily.

“I know.” Sunghoon stopped walking and looked at you with lovingly.

“Thank you. Thank you for being my light, y/n.” You were momentarily taken aback but quickly returned the smile to your lips.

“I always got you. I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

[kachowden]

Hii! I just saw your Loren art work and HE. IS.SO. CUTEEE!!! 💖💖 the pink collar around his neck is 😍😍 but it made me think of a funny scenario (most likely one where reader knows about his obsession with them and uses it to their advantage)

It was a huge game for the college team. Almost everyone and their grand mama came to see it! Two rival teams competing against each other, both known for their long streaks of winning, and not only that! Loren’s darling is on the sidelines cheering him on! (You are probably just watching the game bored out of your mind cuz the coach FORCED you to be there *saying it’ll give them a higher chance of winning*) unfortunately though Loren’s team seems to be losing by a couple points. The stands are restless and the other teams stands even started mocking the players! With Loren’s coach yelling and hollering he suddenly got an idea.

Coach: OY! Number 13’s (girlfriend/boyfriend)! Get over here!

Surprised at the sudden call over you quickly walked over to him. “What-“ “-no time for Lilly gagging! I need you to give number 13 a pep talk! Some type of motivation! You hear me!? I ain’t gonna let these assholes win!!” He cut you off and told you what to do. Thinking for a minute as he pushed you to where Loren was taking a break on the bench, a thought popped up. You sighed and stood in front of him, he looked up to you in with that cute gaze and a sad smile. “Hey (y/n), I know this ain’t look too good but I bet we can still turn this around!” He tried to stay positive (as positive as you can get when making a fool of your self in front of your crush). You just lowered yourself to his eye level and started talking.

(Y/n): don’t worry bout that, don’t worry about what already happened. Just focus on what you do next. Cuz like you said you still have time to turn it around. *you grabbed the back of his neck and leaned into his ear, whispering* if you do manage to win,I’ll celebrate with you-give you a reward. I’ll do things so VILE to you that it’ll make the devil blush~ *giving him a smirk and a kiss on the cheek you left him on the bench*

Meanwhile the other team:”We are destroying those fools!” “They can’t keep up with us!” “That trophy is—wait do y’all hear boss music??”

Long story short Loren’s team won, the other team had most of their players end up in the hospital and he didn’t leave your apartment for almost 3 days after. (He also couldn’t walk properly for a whole week and had to wear more “covering” clothes for a while) —💖💖 anon

I almost feel like I don’t need to write anything at this point! The scenario is too good too pass up though.

——————————

Loren was frustrated. You could see it from where you sat on the teams bench. Technically, you weren’t supposed to be sat their, as it was reserved for the team and all, but the coach had made an exception for you on account of Loren’s-….crush. Or whatever it was. You didn’t know and you didn’t care.

But you had to admit, seeing that look on his face was a little upsetting. The guy had been sweet to you. A little overbearing, but sweet. And you found it a bit hard to deny the butterflies in your stomach whenever he looked so eager for praise or attention from you.

You weren’t stupid. Loren had made his intentions very clear after the first few meetings. “My lucky charm” he so often said. You found that almost laughable, what with how unlucky you often seemed to be.

That felt all the more true when you watched Loren let out a frustrated sigh, his helmet being roughly pulled from his head as the coach called a time out.

You watched, in a somewhat flattered manner, as narrowed brown eyes found their place on you, and subsequently widened in shock and awe. A wide smile broke onto the star players face as he made a beeline straight towards you.

You stood up once he came to a stop infront of the bench you occupied, and handed him his water bottle.

Loren’s tan cheeks flushed darkly, though you weren’t ignorant enough to assume it was from sweat with the way he was staring at you.

It was intense enough to make your heart beat just a little faster.

He panted after a quick sip, trying to catch his breath and not sound more pathetic than he felt.

“What-“ a deep breath “what’re you doing here? I thought you had a test tomorrow?”

Loren didn’t do much to hide how happy he was seeing you. Though the embarrassment of his previous play seemed to quickly settle in when he realized you had been watching him flounder about on the field.

You gave a soft huff and folded your arms. “Yeah-, well.” You glanced to the side, a bit shyly. You weren’t embarrassed. Only a little actually. Maybe a lot. “I finished early and decided to come see the game. A friend of mine told me it was a big deal or something so I figured I’d might as well.” Actually you knew the whole time. And you skipped studying. The real reason you showed up was because you felt guilty after seeing his face when you first rejected the offer.

God it payed to be pretty didn’t it?

Loren’s smile became all the wider at your answer. Though you spotted what seemed like mirth dancing in his eyes, before he shook his head of the cold water he sprayed onto it and looked deeply at you.

“Well I’m glad you came. Though, I wish you hadn’t see us getting our asses kicked out there..”

Jesus that kicked puppy look was killing you. You imagined he probably felt the brunt of his teams failure. Since he was the captain and all. You felt a bit bad for the guy.

“….”

You bit your lip softly.

Am I really about to do this?

If there was one thing you learned about Loren, Is he was driven by motivation. And nothing got him more motivated than you. He was more like a dog than people realized.

With only a few minutes left in the game, you decided it was a now or never situation. Besides, it wasn’t the worse case scenario.

You didn’t mine the idea actually.

With quick resolve you gripped the front of Loren’s jersey with one hand, yanked him down to your height and gripped the hair on the back of his neck firmly with the other, earning a startled grunt from the burly player who looked at you with wide glazed over eyes.

The way he was staring at you was borderline…..

Whatever that wasn’t important right now.

“Loren. I don’t know why the fuck your playing like shit right now.” Your heart ached at the borderline whimper that poured from the poor brunettes chest, “But I know damn well you can kick this shitty little teams ass.”

Loren’s breath cought in his throat for a moment, and he stared deeply in your eyes as if searching for any hint that you didn’t believe what you just said. But when he found nothing he swallowed thickly with a raging flush.

“(Y/n)…”

Time to real him in.

With a heavy exhale you furrowed your brows and gripped tighter on to his shirt.

“If you make a come back and win this game…”

“I’ll give you a kiss.”

.

.

.

Somehow the deafening roar of the two teams crowds faded instantly into white noise. The bright lights of the night poles buzzed dully in your ears as Loren’s brown eyes burned so hard into you, you swore you’d go blind.

“On the lips?”

“On the lips.”

You watched as this 6’6 hunk of man slid onto his knees in front of you, and you forced yourself not to whip around in embarrassment at the sight and the possibly of a dozen eyes watching you.

Loren breathed deeply, pushing his head into your stomach softly, like a dog asking to be pet, and you couldn’t stop yourself from running your fingers through is soft wet hair.

He shuddered, and shakily exhaled. “Promise?” He begged this wasn’t a cruel joke. Something you were going to hang over head.

“Promise.”

Holy fuck

You’d never seen a guy bolt up like that before. With nimble feet he grabbed your hand and placed a gentle kiss on the pads of your fingers, like a promise of what was to come, before turning around and marching onto the field, helmet now securely placed on his head.

The aura he had was intense. Like he was officially in the game for the first time that night. And it seemed both teams realized this, with the way their shoulders tensed and the audience grew more frenzied.

It was over before the enemy could even blink, and the sound of cheers that followed was deafening.

You could feel yourself smile a bit at the sight of Loren’s teammates crowding around him excitedly, like kids who just won a new toy.

He laughed loudly, though quickly jerked away from their hold and ran to you.

He was out of breath when he reached you, and the furious red on his cheeks was very telling. In fact, you were pretty sure the sweat and heavy breathing wasn’t from the game he just played.

Guess you had to commit now huh?

Loren’s gaze was nothing short of eager and desperate, and the way he licked his lips, seemingly unconsciously made the whole thing seem much more vulgar than it actually was.

It was just a kiss right? Probably barely even a peck.

You should’ve known that Loren was gonna get as much out of that single kiss as he could though.

With quick confirmation from you, Loren’s large rough hands took careful hold of your face. He already looked ruined from just touching you, though that may have been the post game sweat.

Time slowed briefly, and before you knew it you felt a heavy breath on your lips, where the star players hovered for a moment before finally pressing down.

It was soft at first. Gentle. His hand moved to the back of your head, pulling you closer amongst the screams and roars of the fans who watched in awe.

Some angry. Most charmed by the romantic display.

Though when Loren’s other hand slid to your lower back, and his foot inched forward to press further into you, causing you trip, the noises faded out again.

Because Loren didn’t stop kissing you. Even when you’d fallen and your mouth popped open to gasp slightly, and his arms caught your head and cradled it tenderly and possessively, he continued to kiss you. Deeply, passionately, and above all else desperately.

What was supposed to be a pretty and simple kiss quickly turned into a make out, Loren’s hands groping at varying parts of your body but never breaking away. Your hands subsequently finding themselves tangled in his spiky soft hair.

At the sound of a low groan pouring from Loren’s lips you snapped out of it and pushed him away, though he resisted for a moment before remembering where he was.

Lifting himself up, he didn’t appear the least bit embarrassed by the public display as he hovered over you on the dewey grass field.

He looked almost frustrated at the interruption if anything.

The sky was dark above him, and the faint artificial lights glowed around you in his eyes. Though you could’ve argued similarly.

He almost looked angelic. If it hadn’t been for the look in his eyes and the odd firmness on your thigh.

Your embarrassment reached its peak when the coach blew his whistle at the two of you.

“Alright Ortega quite snoggin and get your puebescent ass over here! We still gotta wash up and go over the game! ”

Fuck you wanted to crawl in a hole and die so badly. At least your team won the game right?

It was best you didn’t know the only reason they had been losing in the first place was because a certain wonder boy was pouting over your previous rejection.

[moodymisty]

Request: Guilliman / fem!reader and some sexy size difference 👀 trying to navigate the logistics of taking a primarch are either kinky or a nightmare 💫

[ 𝕸𝖔𝖔𝖉𝖞𝕸𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖞'𝖘 𝕸𝖆𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖑𝖎𝖘𝖙 | 𝕬𝖔3 ]

Author's note: The logistics of fucking a primarch or even just doing pretty much anything nsfw or not is a nightmare. I decided to add in a little Guilliman pampering in this one, since it kinda worked out. Enjoy.

Relationships: Guilliman/Fem!Reader

Warnings: NSFW, Oral(male receiving), Size difference, Porn without plot

Guilliman feels warm- almost overwhelmingly so - as you lay against his side.

He’s still asleep, the sun has just barely started to rise and as of yet he’s allowed himself some reprieve, if only for a little while. His ability to do this, just lay down even if only for a little bit, is such a rare treat.

In this warmth however it’s a bit too hot for you; Terra is beginning to heat up and the massive primarch’s body temp is a bit stifling. You don’t have any blankets on the bed, and while you lay in your thin and airy nightdress, Guilliman wears a thin pair of trousers and nothing else.

He looks so peaceful when he sleeps; the wrinkles on his face soften just a bit, now that his brow isn’t permanently hard set. It's a habit of his and sometimes you joke that his face will stick that way forever at this rate, and you'll either get told to shush, or he'll joke back that perhaps it already has.

His chest raises and lowers with his slow breaths, and for a moment you almost wish that the galaxy wasn't the way it was, so you could enjoy this more often. You’re also nearly tempted to climb onto his chest, until you look downward towards his legs that run far past your own.

With one leg out straight, Guilliman has the other one partly bent to the side, and through the thin fabric of his trousers you can clearly see that he’s half hard.

It’s something that just happens, you know, but it still makes your mouth water and piques your interest. Going back to sleep suddenly seems a bit less interesting now. No one has come to retrieve Guilliman either, be it one of his legion or one of his fellow primarchs, so you suppose there's time.

Painstakingly slow you pull away from his side, sliding downward until you make it to his hips. You consider crawling over his one leg to sit between them, but you’re too worried it would wake him up early and ruin this. Then again, it's entirely possible he's waking up or already is, and is simply letting you feel like you're being sneaky. You don't doubt the primarch is far more keen than baseline humans, even in his sleep. Then again while him being a light sleeper would make sense given his duties, he rarely allows himself sleep to begin with unless he's sure there's nothing to be done, so in these moments he takes solace in being not only safe, but uninterrupted; Knocking out like a light.

Your hands oh so gently grasp the top of his trousers and pull downward, watching his face turned to his left side as he sleeps. He doesn’t flinch surprisingly, and you’re able to gently grasp his cock with one hand and pull it over top of his waistband without waking him.

After you succeed in doing it, you swiftly realize that what you had in mind might have more logistical problems than you had thought in the height of your growing arousal.

In the moments you've managed to steal with him, those time are few and your relationship is new, it sometimes took hours before he managed to slip over half of his cock into you. With your mouth, you now have to try and fit at least some of him into your mouth without choking. A tall order, as Guilliman's tall stature has more than caused him to be proportional.

You are nothing if not persistent however, and accidentally choking yourself is more than worth the satisfaction of gifting something Guilliman rarely experiences.

leaning forward your lips softly brush over the tip of his cock, watching his face intently. He only shifts slightly, and so your lips part and you slowly try to take as much into your mouth as you can while one hand wraps around the base of his shaft, and your other hand keeps you from falling right over.

You don't get much farther than that, as once your head begins to slowly bob, he groans as he rouses from sleep; Blurry eyes blinking open.

“What…?”

His eyes focus and watches you lay at his hips, hand around his cock. He watches you struggle to take him into your mouth, spit pooling in the corner of your lips. One droplet trickles down your chin slowly.

“You never cease to surprise me,” He says tiredly, gravely voice laced with sleep and the just barely audible hint of arousal.

Any other time you might’ve attempted this Guilliman would have surely refused, not wishing to inconvenience you or waste time he needed to use elsewhere. He was a busy man, and he often time disallowed himself so many things for the sake of efficiency. As much as he might want to, he wasn't allowed to be selfish; As well as not knowing how to ask for such a thing in the first place.

But now, he’s been so worn out by the past few weeks that he finds himself victim to you curious games, and for once allows himself to be on the receiving end of your affection.

Your lips slide farther down his shaft and the tip of his cock presses against the soft palette at the back of your throat, causing it to tighten as you try to avoid gagging. Guilliman groans at the feeling but raises a hand towards you.

“Careful, I,” His voice hitches as your lips pull back slightly. “Don’t choke.”

You heed his warning but only slightly, still treading the line between taking as much of him into your mouth as you possibly can, and not choking. Occasionally your eyes flick upward to see his still sleepy expression change as your tongue and lips glide along his cock- the wrinkles on his face for once not exaggerating with anger or irritation. He's watching you so intently that it's almost embarrassing, but to see him unravel is worth the feeling of your face and neck feeling like they're on fire.

You hear Guilliman uncharacteristically swear into the quiet room, the only other noises being the sound of blankets rustling and the wet noise of slopping spit. The sun is just barely spilling into the room, you can see the beginnings of sunrays pooling on the bed and Guilliman's skin.

The primarch as far as you know has never been at the receiving end of things like this, so you seek to please him no matter the difficulty of the size difference. Your jaw hurts and your mouth waters from how full it is, but your body feels hot and stomach tight. You'd slip one of your hands downward to rub your clit if one wasn't holding you upright, and the other wrapped around the base of Guilliman's cock that you couldn't fit into your mouth. So it throbs begging, cunt clenching around nothing as you briefly imagine the cock in your mouth being stuffed inside of your cunt instead.

Later, perhaps.

With a groan Guilliman lets his head fall back, throwing his weight and making the bed shake. It accidentally bounces your head in his cock for just a moment and barely tickles the back of your throat, a feeling that makes the primarch have to prevent his hips from thrusting upward to chase the feeling even at the cost of you choking. He feels the vibration from your throat as you moan, trying to relax your jaw as your hand touches what of him you can’t fit. You swallow some spit mixed with precum that's pooled in the back of your throat, and the movement makes him noticeably jump.

You can feel he close, his cock twitches in your mouth and when you hear him mumble near incoherently in some sort of attempt to perhaps warn you, you prepare yourself as he fills your mouth only moments later.

The shaky, pleased groan is something you’d love to hear more of, and you already have a million and one ideas on how to do this again as you swallow his cum. In an embarrassing thought you realize just how much he has, it's a struggle to swallow it all at first and prevent it leaking down your throat.

He leans up on an elbow to look at you, his pupils still wide and face noticeably red. His lips are slightly parted as he pants from exertion but not the kind he's used to, brow furrowing once again.

“You will be the death of me, you know,”

He says as you pull your mouth of his cock fully and rub your sore jaw. You stretch it wide and wince at the ache, knowing it will hurt for a decent while now. You still smirk at him anyways and wipe the spit away from the corners of your lips.

“Is that better or worse than dying in battle?” Guilliman doesn’t answer, and you can see his mouth shift as he tries to hide his emotions.

“Come here.” He leans forward and grips your hip before gently tugging, emphasizing his words. When you don't move right away, he leans fully upright and grasps your waist, easily moving you with no effort on his part. Your difference in size can be quite advantageous to him, in that regard.

“Let me return the favor.”

[sodasa-was-taken]

Romantic foils done right: How G-Witch uses romantic foils

Or why none of the characters who showed interest in Miorine and Suletta ever posed a threat to them getting together.

So, after the unexpected response to my last analysis and some recent discussions, I felt inspired to make another one. This time about romantic foils, a frequently misused but great tool in romances. I hope you enjoy it.

As far as I can tell, G-Witch has five romantic foils: Guel, El4n, Shaddiq, El5n, and Sophie.

In romances, when a character is in contrast to one of the main characters as a romantic option, they're a romantic foil. Having romantic foils in a story can be a great way to show what the principal characters see in each other. This is done by showcasing what the characters like and dislike about characters with contrasting attributes to the one they'll end up with.

Sometimes, it can feel like a romantic foil is just there to create cheap drama, often when they're a romantic rival, i.e., actively trying to get in the way of the main characters becoming a thing. Other times, when one of the focal characters isn’t the best person, an author might have a character who’s a romantic rival be even more of an asshole to make the character look better in comparison. This doesn’t make the character look better; it just creates a pick-your-poison situation. Furthermore, jackass and even more of a jackass ain’t foils since there isn’t any contrast. That isn’t to say that romantic foils can’t be antagonistic. Many of the romantic foils in G-Witch are also antagonists. In cases where a romantic foil is an antagonist, they emphasize the virtues of the characters they’re a foil to by being everything they’re not.    

Guel, foil to Suletta – At the beginning of the show, Guel is everything Suletta is not regarding their treatment and intentions towards Miorine. Suletta is apologetic to a fault, while Guel pushes Miorine around like he owns her. Guel is abrasive, while Suletta is considerate. He’s ostentatious, and she’s shy. Crucially, Suletta’s shyness doesn’t prevent her from having pride in herself. She just doesn’t need to show off like Guel.

Miorine grows fond of Suletta for the same reason she dislikes Guel. He’s the embodiment of everything Miorine hates about her predicament, and Suletta is the opposite. Although Miorine sees them as two sides of the same coin at first, both are out to insert themselves into her life, just in different ways. Except as Miorine soon enough learns, Suletta had no intention of doing so but just couldn’t stand by while seeing someone in distress. Side note: It’s ironic how opposed Miorine is to Suletta interfering in her life when Miorine later follows Suletta around like a lost puppy and insists on helping her any chance she gets. 

Attributes Miorine likes about Suletta that Guel notably lacks include, but are not limited to, her humbleness, her upbeat nature, her gratefulness, and her commitment to doing what she thinks is right. Also relevant if you think Miorine is a Lesbian; Suletta is a girl.   

When it comes to why they become the Holder, Guel is doing it for himself, and Miorine is simply a prize to be won. Suletta, on the other hand, ends up as the Holder unintentionally, dueling to help out Miorine rather than to have her. In fact, when she learns that being a woman does not exempt her from being Miorine’s groom, she goes full blue screen of death. 

Guel, foil to Miorine – Straight from one character’s romantic foil to the other. Guel is Suletta's foil until he catches feelings for her and shifts to become Miorine's. After being the first demonstration of Suletta's extreme discomfort with someone coming on too strong Guel denies his affection for Suletta. This happens shortly after Miorine has Suletta donning the uniform which shows the two are engaged.

In episode nine, while Miorine does everything she can to guarantee they win the duel against Grassley House, Guel won’t even fight because Dad told him he wasn’t allowed to duel. He doesn’t want Earth House and, more specifically, Suletta to lose, but not enough to disobey his father.

At the backend of season two, Guel becomes a regular foil to Miorine instead of a romantic foil since he’s no longer interested in getting with Suletta or, as he puts it, there are more important things than whatever feelings he might have for Suletta. This means he isn’t being motivated by those feelings the same way Miorine is by her love for Suletta and can, therefore, look a bit more objectively. It also means that he doesn’t stop Miorine from doing something he sees as fruitless because helping her break Suletta’s heart is a prize he’s willing to pay to save Jeturk Heavy Machinery.            

Side note: Guel does his job as a foil quite well, but because he’s a foil, his prominence is completely unwarranted. It might’ve been a little more reasonable if he was the only romantic foil, but this story has five. Giving this much attention to a romantic foil in a romance about a straight couple would be unthinkable. Still, because the story is about a same-sex couple, they can’t be the image of their own story.     

El4n, foil to Miorine – El4n is the only romantic foil in the story, highlighting the flaws of the one he's a foil to. His function in the show is to get Miorine worked up and showcase that Suletta isn't the type to pine. Side note: Suletta appears to be quite binary when it comes to others having feelings for her. Either they like her romantically, or they never will.

From very early on, El4n shows a fondness for Suletta, which Miorine is having none of. Later on, El4n asks Suletta out to get to Aerial. Side note: Gotta love how Miorine compares Suletta and El4n to Romeo and Juliet, considering that if any characters in this series have their budding relationship sabotaged by the feud between their families, it’s Miorine and Suletta. 

When El4n learns that Suletta isn’t an Enhanced Person like himself, his demeanor towards Suletta changes on the spot. The progression of Suletta’s relationship with El4n is an inversion of her relationship with Miorine. Where Miorine had to overcome a misconception about Suletta for her fondness for Suletta to grow, a misconception about Suletta is what El4n's fondness for Suletta initially sprung from. Additionally, El4n asks Suletta out because he wants something from her, while Miorine pretends she wants something from Suletta, but in truth, she wants to prevent Suletta from becoming the one who got away. Girl didn't pass up the chance to go to Earth in order to save Suletta because she needed a shield. 

Despite Suletta having an interest in El4n, spurred on by him showing an interest in her and El4n eventually reciprocating, a relationship between them would never work as their goals are diametrically opposed. If El4n wants to keep his life and be allowed to live his life as he pleases, he needs to win a duel against Suletta and take Aerial away from her. Something she can’t let happen because, for one, she wouldn’t even give up Aerial for the person she’s excited to marry, and two, losing would be letting down Miorine, someone she cares deeply about, and Suletta’s not about that.

When Suletta wins the fight, she also wins back El4n’s heart, but their relationship is doomed before it starts because El4n fails to secure Aerial for the Peil company and has to die for his failure. El4n accepts this and doesn’t fight to stay in Suletta’s life, instead thanking her and letting death take him.

In the last episode, El4n apologizes to Suletta for standing her up to which Suletta basically tells him not to sweat it as she’s come to learn that the person for her wasn’t him.           

Shaddiq, foil to Suletta – Here’s someone who starts out coming off as approachable but who’s revealed to be more and more deranged as the series goes on. Shaddiq is willing to do whatever it takes to get what he wants all the while keeping his friendly appearance and calming smile.

Throughout episode nine, it becomes clear that while Shaddiq and Suletta are both upbeat go-getters, their views on Miorine couldn’t be more different. Shaddiq does, to some degree, care about Miorine, but what he thinks is best for Miorine is at odds with what Miorine wants. He justifies his attempts to control her with her being stubborn and unreasonable. She doesn’t know what would be the best for her, and Shaddiq’s been nothing but kind to her, so he doesn’t get why she keeps turning him down. This guy sure is tipping his metaphorical fedora.

The epitome of Suletta and Shaddiq’s conflicting views is shown when Shaddiq runs into Suletta after being at the greenhouse. He fails to reason with Miorine, so he tries to get Suletta to talk some reason into telling her that as Miorine’s groom, it’s her responsibility to talk some sense into her. Suletta doesn’t agree with the sentiment and instead thinks that her role as Miorine’s groom is to stand by her and support her. A very how the spouge of a woman should aim to protect and provide for their wife vs. they should treat their wife as an equal and encourage them to do what they want schools of thoughts. As Miorine seems perfectly content to be the primary breadwinner in the relationship, that first idea has less than no appeal to her.

Suletta ultimately turns out to be right, with the show taking a shot at the whole strong man who’s the sole protector of what’s deemed to be his mentality. After his defeat, he tells Miorine that he should have offered to fight for her, which most likely would have gotten him nowhere. Before Miorine met Suletta, she wouldn’t let anyone fight for her, and a good part of why Miorine rolled with Suletta becoming Holder was because she had no intention to. There’s no way of having the intention to become Holder and do what Suletta did. The intention is there, and that’s the problem. It cannot be overstated how little Suletta would care about being the Holder if Miorine hadn’t wanted her to be.

When Shaddiq learns that Miorine will be at Plant Quetta, he callously shrugs off the idea that he should try to stop her from getting hurt and leave it up to fate if she makes it out alive. This becomes somewhat vindictive when he probably justifies this kind of thinking by making it Miorine’s own fault for rejecting his protection. She doesn’t want him to keep her safe so he will do no such thing.                            

El5n, foil to Miorine – There’s not much to say here. El5n  showcases Suletta’s aversion to someone coming on too strong and her commitment to be with Miorine, as by the time El5n first makes a move on Suletta, she’s already hopelessly in love with Miorine. He and Miorine are also opposite extremes when it comes to their interactions with Suletta. El5n insists that Suletta should get with him while Miorine rejects that she has any veto over who Suletta can be with.

Sophie, foil to Miorine – Mostly qualifies for acting antithetically to Miorine and self-identifying as someone who sees Miorine as an obstacle to getting to Suletta. Although Sophie technically doesn’t express interest in being with Suletta romantically, since she goes full Yandere mode at the mention of Suletta being with someone else, she might as well be. One of a romantic foil’s main functions is to demonstrate why a relationship with them wouldn’t be in the best interest of the person they’re interested in having a relationship with. Declaring that she’ll have to kill Miorine to get the relationship she wants with Suletta makes Sophie succeed with flying colors in that regard.

Being a Yandere, Sophie doesn’t understand what would be offputting about telling Suletta she’s going to kill her loved ones. In her mind, she’s setting Suletta free to become a ruthless killer, which really shows how much she’s misjudged what Suletta is like as a person. As the cherry on top, it turns out Sophie’s obsessed with Ericht and not Suletta.  

This is another case of a character being the opposite extreme of Miorine. Concurrently with the event involving Norea and Sophie, Miorine is at the point where she’s blaming Prospera for Suletta’s actions, as she can’t see her little ball of innocence killing people unless she has been manipulated. 

            

From a meta-perspective, El4n, Guel, and Shaddiq are also the antithesis of what a romance protagonist should be due to their inability to fight for love. They’re defeatist and, at points, almost deterministic. After one major setback, they turn back to the person of their affection in the sense that they leave the person’s well-being up to fate. Something Suletta and Miorine never do to each other. Even when their insecurities get the better of them, they still have the other’s happiness and well-being in mind.

Furthermore, having the romantic foils display philosophies associated with determinism is a sort of social commentary in a sense. A part of Japanese culture is the acceptance of bad things happening and a willingness to make the best of an unfavorable situation, sometimes expressed through the word shouganai and similar words. This is a perfectly wealthy mentality until it gets used in situations people can and, more importantly, should be doing something about or, at the very least, be less accepting of. Case in point: whatever is up with Japan being behind on queer rights despite its several partnerships with multiple Western countries. So, having characters that act like their hands are tied and just shrug it off makes them foils to Suletta and Miorine, where needing to do something about a bad situation is a major part of their characters. The fact that the characters in question are products of the elite and two queer people who keep getting screwed over by the system is quite reflective of the contrast between activists in Japan and the country they live in.         

As the show is now, pairing these guys with the heroines reeks of heteronormativity. It doesn’t matter whether or not that’s the intention; it still does. Two female characters can go through thick and thin together, always having each other’s back whenever possible, and some people see their relationship as equal or even inferior to their barely existing or one-sided relationship with a man. The level of hypocrisy is astounding. It feeds into the idea that guys are entitled to have their feelings returned just by existing. That’s a big part of the reason there are guys who feel threatened by sapphic couples. It messes with their indoctrination that a woman would rather be with another woman than them.

It’s almost amusing how any of these characters come across as having a chance with either Miorine or Suletta when they’re never presented as such in the narrative. Unless the series was going to do a storytelling faux pas, Suletta and Miorine getting together is an inevitability by episode three. Having all this build-up just for them to end with someone else would be narrative nonsense. Good thing that didn’t happen.

[gallusrostromegalus]

So how much are you willing to talk about Ulquiorra?

I will talk so much about him. There are so many things wrong with that man, but to make a brief list of his most notable features:

He's dumb as hell.

I say that with tremendous sympathetic affection. Ulquiorra barely thinks. It's easy for him to do nothing and go nowhere. He eats chocolate in the middle of the night in the dark. When he gets access to a garden, he often just stands around in it. He's often waiting for things to happen.

He just LOOKS smart compared to nearly everyone else in the fic because he doesn't have much to say, so he's not constantly opening his mouth to jam his foot down it.

Consequently, Ulquiorra starts off having little to no initiative of his own. Stuff just happens to him. Some of that is because he is colossally depressed, but he's depressed because the idea that he has control over his circumstances has straight up not occured to him.

The first person he meets that shows him that "You can just do whatever you want, forever" and the boundless joy it is to be a creature of free will is, unfortunately, Aizen. And Aizen left off the key corollary "-EVERYONE is allowed to do whatever they want, forever. We are all equal in God's dead, empty eye sockets."

So Ulquiorra wanders around trying out this "doing stuff" thing without any concept of ethics.

I realize I am infantilizing this character, but I am doing so in a twilight zone "hey, wouldn't it be fucked up to watch a fully anatomically functional person who is able to speak and blow stuff up with his mind go through the emotional development steps of a toddler?", because I think that's a fun high-concept premise to explore with him. Yeah, what if a toddler could speak articulately and also destroy you? How would he act? How does he feel, learning to have feelings?

It'd probably suck for him and everyone around him, and make him very easy to manipulate, for one thing.

So I don't think Ulquiorra is evil, because evil takes intent. He is dangerous to be in the general proximity of, though

Like a horse

lose

in a hospital!

I love that sketch as much as the next person but if an IRL horse got loose in a hospital it would be bedlam, but the horse would be mostly confused and probably willing to follow around the first person who looked like they knew what they were doing.

You know, like how Ulquiorra follows Aizen around because that's the first guy he's met who THINKS he knows what he's doing, and is good at convincing others he knows what he's doing!

So Ulquiorra's entire first character arc is being exposed to more and more people and realizing he does have control over his life, and that he can take actions, and that those actions have consequences.

Like being emotionally devastated by a teenage girl because he was an asshole to her and she's willing to scream at him about it.

Hm.

Consequences hurt.

He lives through the Las Noches arc, and decides to follow his own star!

He follows it right through a portal that was not meant for him and now he's sort of trapped in somewhere he's really, really, really, really, REALLY not supposed to be.

But it's a beautiful place

And nobody is forcing him to do anything.

And for a long time, he just stands out in the garden, waiting for something.

But then

Ulquiorra experiences a novel pair of emotions that he's recently learned from his new...

Orihime is too mad at him for him to call her a friend.

-but he did learn the names and therefore the experience of two new emotions from her: boredom, and it's natural remedy: curiosity.

So Ulquiorra's second character arc is him learning how to be himself without anyone telling him who he is and what he ought to be.

He's travelling up Maslow's hierarchy with the inscrutable but unstoppable instinctual drive of a salmon returning to its spawning ground.

This has lead to an important discovery on my part: Ulquiorra is terrific for comedy because he is the ULTIMATE straight man to everyone else's nonsense, because he's immune to nearly all nonsense.

He doesn't have societal taboos to be hung up on, nor any sense of what is "normal", so the sole thing he geta hung up on is a lack of internal consistency in others, meaning he can slip between straight man to the absurdist at the drop of a single scathing observation. Yet, he retains a sort of understated dignity that compels people to try to earn his respect.

Hence, I'm having fun turning him loose on the most absurd, internally inconsistent and frankly, insane batch of characters in the series:

The Royal Guard.

:)

[wolfhoundwitch]

A Guide to Graveyard Work

One of the earliest introductions I had to spirit work as a baby witch was graveyard work. In short, this practice involves building relationships with the deceased spirits of a graveyard, by communicating, leaving offerings and being mindful of their space. It is part of a wider practice known as death work, but this focuses specifically on how to enter and respect what is essentially the 'home' of the spirits you are working with. You can further build on your practice from this.

This is a handy guide to the different aspects of the practice, looking into the appropriate offerings and etiquette, written with a lot of love.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

Graveyard Etiquette

There are rules you must follow in graveyards, whether for your personal safety, out of politeness, or following the law of your country. Sometimes these overlap. But sometimes, the rules you hear might be no more than baseless superstition, which there is a lot of concerning graveyards. There are way too many superstitions to list, however -

Some good rules to follow are:

Don't begin this work with the intention of taking from the graveyard or using the spirits in your practice. In the same way you wouldn't take from a stranger, it's important to build a relationship before you ask for things.

Try not to stand on graves where possible, out of respect for the dead but also those mourning them. Sometimes, graveyards are set up so that it is impossible to go anywhere without stepping on something, which is okay so long as you're not intending disrespect. However, do be wary that headstones can fall and the ground can shift.

Some people believe you shouldn't take any photos of the graves. I personally think that if the grave is old enough, it doesn't matter too much. If the grave is modern, it might be inappropriate for those in mourning to see you taking photos.

You can clean up trash, but be mindful of what might be considered trash. Obvious thrown-away food and drink packaging might be appropriate to clean up, but what if someone left a deceased one's favourite food at their grave? Or what if you decide to get rid of a toy or letter left there? Try to avoid cleaning up around the actual graves and focus on cleaning near the gates or in empty areas.

Don't trespass! If the cemetery has set entry times, enter and leave only within those times. Don't jump the fence, and don't enter any areas that are clearly gated or off-limits.

Leave an offering when asking to take something from the cemetery grounds. I don't feel it necessary to leave an offering each time you enter, especially if you plan on visiting often. But, if you want to take something like graveyard dirt or plants growing there, leave an offering for sure. And make sure to ASK. If you feel wrong, it's a no.

If you EVER find anything askew in a graveyard, such as vandalism, theft, or even dug up bones (it happens, I've found them before) PLEASE report it straight to the groundskeeper, associated church, or relevant authorities. It is not your responsibility to attempt to fix these things, or take things for yourself.

Offerings

You can leave offerings at the gate, or on specific graves if you want to work directly with that spirit. You don't always need to leave an offering, but it is a good thing to do when building a relationship and especially when asking to take from the site.

Some good offerings are:

Coins, especially two coins. There is a belief that the two coins are placed on the eyes of the deceased to pay the ferryman taking them over the river Styx. This has been maintained as a tradition.

Flowers. Even better if you look into Victorian flower symbolism for older grave sites and base your offering on this.

Origami. I would often fold multiple tiny cranes and leave them as offerings on individual graves. The best part is they are biodegradable.

I would be wary of leaving any kind of food or drink, as you might attract animals or even cause harm to the ecosystems living there. The same goes for anything made of plastic or that could hurt an animal.

Natural items such as seashells, feathers or stones are great, safe options for offerings.

You could also burn a candle or incense, but remember to stay with them while they burn and make sure they are extinguished when you leave.

Offerings don't have to be physical - you could say a few kind words, sing to them, or even just dedicating time to sit with the dead or talk with them can be an offering in itself.

Protection

I personally don't go into my practice thinking I could get possessed or followed by a demon at any given moment. However, I do think it's important to remember that graveyards can be full of a lot of upset, angry, and occasionally malevolent energies. Even if you don't intend to, these energies can attach to you or be taken home by you and can make you feel off.

Here are some ways you can protect yourself:

Cleanse yourself before and after entering a cemetery, even just by meditating and visualising or by using incense.

Check out my post on shielding techniques, and try to familiarise yourself with the visualisation techniques until you feel comfortable doing them.

Charm an item of clothing, such as a piece of jewellery, as an amulet to ward against negative energies that you can wear.

Find or create a protective sigil or rune that you can draw on something or on yourself.

You can pray to any deities you work with to ask for protection, especially if these deities are associated with death or spirits.

Communication

People who practice death work might communicate with the dead in different ways. They might be clairvoyant, use divination, feel energies or sometimes even just know what the spirits are saying. In any sense, spirit communication is a skill that is very much required in this practice. @koscheys-skull said it best here. You need good communication skills, in the sense that you are still talking to PEOPLE. And you need to go in with good intentions. If you are going in purely with the intention of using the dead for your own benefit, you won't get very far. If you can't talk to and actively listen with some semblance of empathy, you won't get very far. Death work is not an aesthetic, it is not for you to take your emo photos and be disrespectful. it is a serious, difficult and tolling practice that takes a lot of time and refining.

If you have gotten this far, I wish you all the best. It is a difficult but ultimately fulfilling part of spirit work, and if you are ready to dedicate the time and effort to it, you will get a lot out of it.

Thanks for reading! Please visit my tags for more guides, and feel free to reach out with requests for more information. Lots of love.

[midnight-bay-if]

Alright, everyone else gets angst posting, I’ll give it a shot.

How would the RO’s react to some sort of spell being cast on the MC, making them think their father is there? Some sort of ploy to get the MC closer to them, probably for harm.

Loving the story so far!!! :)

(Ouch, this hurts... My fellow pain enjoyers, rejoice! Also, apologies that this took so long to get to.)

S: They see it. The clarity in your eyes fog over, the once bright light filling with murky water. It's a sight S has witnessed often. You have been hit with a powerful curse to dominate your mind and fill your head with painful visions.

"Dad..."

You whisper the familial title like a solemn prayer, reaching out into the empty space before you, and S's chest lurches. They do not hesitate to act. In moments, they stand in front of you, grasping your face with both hands as they stare into your eyes, filling your vision with them rather than what they can only imagine coaxes you behind them.

"It isn't real. Look at me," they order, pressing their forehead against yours. "I'm so sorry, my love, but it isn't real. Whoever has cast this curse on you means to harm you, and I will not let that happen. Keep your eyes closed, darling. Keep them closed until I can take it away."

Rain: Rain doesn't understand what is happening. One moment, both of you were enjoying a bit of banter, a playful back-and-forth with teasing insults, before it stopped. Everything stopped.

"MC?"

Nothing. Then, something. You look straight past them as you call out to the darkness. "Dad..."

"Oh, no."

In a flash of realisation, Rain steps between you and the apparition. Anybody or anything willing to conjure up an image of your greatest wound does not have good intentions, but Rain cannot fight what they do not see.

"I'm sorry for this, MC," they whisper, clasping a hand firmly over your eyes. "Your dad isn't there, MC, I promise you that. I'm so sorry that I can't make it different."

Taj: Taj senses it before they see it. Something in the air, like a crack of electricity whipping across their skin. It causes the scars to ache. Then, Taj turns to you, ready to ask if you are sensing something similar. But what they are greeted with terrifies them.

Your usual colourful eyes have dampened as if a dark smog is purposefully shutting out the light. It scares them.

"Dad..."

Taj watches as you reach for an empty space, an lifeless smile on your face.

"Oi, Koel, snap out of it." Taj snaps in front of your face, their heart beating rapidly in their chest. When you keep reaching out to nothingness, Taj grabs your hand and holds it to their chest. "There's nothing there, so stop it. Please."

When even that doesn't seem to work, Taj snaps. "Oh, fuck it." With their forehead pressed firmly against yours, they hold you in place.

"Listen to me right now. Your dad is dead. You spent your entire life fucking shit up because of it, and I fuckin' love you for that. No matter how shit things got, you never gave up. So don't you dare fall to this now. Ya hear me?"

N: N knows dark magic when they see it. They are sure to some their magic could be considered dark. In their opinion, a little mind-reading wasn't really hurtful... Well, that was what they believed until meeting you. Now, they see you reaching out into nothing and feel their burning skin turn cold.

"Dad..."

"Oh, no you don't," they mutter, standing between you and the nothing you reach for. "Sorry, my dear, but I get terribly jealous. I can't let just anyone inside your head."

N is inside you in an instant. For once, they don't wish to see. Instead, they concentrate hard on creating some kind of barrier to stop access. "Feel free to punish me later. I'll wait with anticipation."

Umbra: Umbra has spent far too long gazing into your eyes. They have every tiny variation of colour seered into their mind. The instant the colour of your eyes becomes muted, their already pallid skin grows paler.

"Dad..."

They turn towards where you reach for, and they realise you are grasping at nothing.

This isn't like them. This moment isn't like theirs. They had no body to lose; it was given. But it breaks their heart to think you might believe this is possible thanks to what they are.

With a tentative touch, Umbra reaches up to cup your cheek, hoping the cold of their touch might serve as a light raft to pull you to safety from wherever your mind lays adrift. "Feel the cold, MC. Feel what is real, and know what is not. I'm sorry, I know it is selfish, but I need you back with me."

[guywithn0name]

-Alphabet headcanons-

;Hobie Brown

Hobie Brown x any gender reader

🎸 | Masterlist | 🎸

The post’s style is edited, it’s otherwise the same (^з^)-☆

Warnings: swearing (like one word)

-‘A’ is for AFFECTION (how affectionate are they?)

Hobie’s an affectionate guy. His love language is definitely physical touch and acts of service in my opinion. He always has an arm wrapped around you or he’s holding your hand. No matter what it is, he’s always in physical contact with you in some way even if it’s small. He’ll also make sure you’re always alright and he’s definitely played some of your favourite songs for you on his guitar to show how much he cares for you.

-‘B’ is for BESTFRIEND (what are they like as a bestfriend?)

If I had to choose one word on how it is to be Hobie’s friend, it’d be chaotic. He definitely cares for you, but he’s always up to something dumb. No matter what you’re up to, he can be your partner in crime. Wanna steal something from a large company? He’s there. Wanna go to a concert? He’ll be there with you. Or wanna go into the city and support small businesses? He’s definitely there with you.

-‘C’ is for CUDDLES (how and do they like to cuddle?)

Hobie honestly loves cuddles. It doesn’t matter to him if he’s the big spoon or the little spoon. Just cuddle with him. Surprisingly tho, he doesn’t like cuddling in public tho. He likes cuddling in private because he finds it relaxing in his chaotic life. Hobie likes chaos but a moment of peace every now and then is like heaven to him.

-‘D’ is for DOMESTIC (if they settle down, how will they help?)

Hobie does the house work, sometimes. He’ll help you around the house but he ends up leaving his clothes and other punk items around the place. Hobie also can’t cook for his life honestly. So if neither of you can cook, you two aren’t gonna be doing too good. He probably does some house work while listening to loud music that makes the neighbours hate him, honestly.

-‘E’ is for ENDING (how would the break up go?)

It would definitely happen face to face. Hobie thinks breaking up over text or call is just plain rude. He would be pretty straight forward about it, so he wouldn’t beat around the bush with you about wanting to break up.

-‘F’ is for FIANCÉ (how do they feel about marriage)

Hobie wouldn’t wanna get married. He doesn’t believe in commitment and getting married would kinda contradict what he always says. But Hobie definitely wouldn’t go sleeping around with other people, he likes you enough to kind of stay ‘committed’ to you. Hobie doesn’t like to admit it but he’s definitely committed to you, but he’ll never admit that.

-‘G’ is for GENTLE (how gentle are they?)

He is genuinely a nice and gentle guy even tho he’s a punk. He always makes sure he doesn’t overstep your boundaries. He’ll try to get you out of your comfort zone from time to time but he’ll never be too pushy with things. If you ever want to try something different or new, you best bet that Hobie will be there to support you and help you with it.

-‘H’ is for HUGS (do they like hugs?)

Yes. Hobie loves hugs. He’s a huge sucker for physical touch. So expect hugs from him, along with other kinds of physical affection too.

-‘I’ is for I LOVE YOU (when do they say I love you for the first time?)

Hobie probably said ‘I love you’ for the first time when you two were just hanging out together at his flat. He was tuning his guitar and the words kind of just came out.

-‘J’ is for JEALOUSY (do they get easily jealous? And if they do, what will they do?)

Hobie doesn’t get easily jealous, but on the very very rare occasions that he does. He’ll put his hand on your waist or put an arm around your shoulder while glaring at the person very intently. Hobie also has a resting bitch face so it’s easy to intimidate someone when he wants to, with his height also coming into play.

-‘K’ is for KISSES (how often do they like to get or give kisses, and where?)

Hobie gives kisses a lot, and he loves receiving them along with giving them. His absolute favourite spot to kiss you is on your forehead, it’s an easy spot to kiss in his opinion. Hobie’s favourite spot to be kissed is on his lips, it could be a quick and sweet kiss or a long and passionate one. He’ll definitely love it.

-‘L’ is for LITTLE ONES (how are they with kids?)

He’s great with kids. Kids usually stare at him since his style is so different and new to them. If a kid asks to touch a piercing that’s on his face or wants to touch his spiky jacket, he’ll pretty much always accept. Hobie’s always gentle with kids and they’re just naturally drawn to him.

-‘M’ is for MORNINGS (how are mornings with them?)

Hobie hates waking up early, he tries to hold off getting out of bed for as long as he can. He’s super groggy for the first ten minutes of him being out bed, but after that he’s back to being himself.

-‘N’ is for NIGHTS (how are nights with them?)

Hobie definitely has a whole hair routine. He uses all the essential oils and hair products, you can’t change my mind. He also definitely cares about his hair more than he’s willing to admit. He also 100% wears a bonnet when he goes to sleep, can’t change my mind. But other than that, it’s all pretty chill with the occasional shower before going to bed (he doesn’t shower every day, sorry to admit it)

-‘O’ is for OPEN (how open are they about themselves?)

Hobie’s not secretive but he also isn’t the most open person to strangers. But once he gets more comfortable with you he’s definitely one of the most open people ever, like he’ll say whatever comes to mind. Even if it’s the dumbest thing ever.

-‘P’ is for PATIENCE (how patient are they with you?)

Hobie is super patient with you. Don’t wanna talk about it? It’s alright, he’ll be there to keep you company in silence. Just wanna be alone? He’ll let you be and he’ll go so something else like play his guitar or do patch some of his clothes. He’s the most patient guy ever, seriously.

-‘Q’ is for QUIZZES (how much do they remember about you?)

Like any good British punk, he remembers what he can. Hobie’s memory isn’t the best but it’s still really good. He does try to remember as much as he can, which is actually a lot. I can’t guarantee that he remembers every tiny detail, but he still remembers a lot.

-‘R’ is for REMEMBER (what’s their favourite moment in the relationship?)

Hobie’s favourite moment in y’all’s relationship was probably when you two went to a concert of one of his all time favourite bands. You wore punk clothes together and just had loads of fun at the concert.

-‘S’ is for SECURITY (how protective are they?)

Like with the jealousy one, Hobie isn’t that protective. As long as some creep doesn’t try to come and harass you, he’s otherwise pretty chill.

-‘T’ is for TRY (how much effort are they putting into the relationship, dates and ect?)

He doesn’t try too hard, but he’ll give you the occasional gift. (that’s totally not stolen) And if Hobie is feeling extra nice he’ll even go to some small business and buy something from there he’ll give to you in your anniversary or Valentine’s Day.

-‘U’ is for UGLY (what’s a bad habit of theirs?)

Since his universe is set in the 1960’s. His bad habit is probably smoking. Smoking was pretty common in the 1960’s so he probably does it too. Tho, Hobie does steal the cigarettes from stores. No way he pays for them. (except if it’s from a small business)

-‘V’ is for VANITY (how insecure are they?)

Hobie being insecure? Not a thing. The last thing he’ll ever be is insecure. He’s always super confident in himself and the things he does. Hobie isn’t one of those people who are over confident, but he’s the perfect mix of it.

-‘W’ is for WHOLE (do they feel whole without you?)

Hobie wouldn’t be incomplete without you, but he’d probably miss you depending on how much he cares for you and how close the two of you were.

-‘X’ is for XTRA (extra headcanon about them)

He’s definitely written songs about you, and he also plays them to you when you two hang out. If Hobie let you put a sticker on his guitar, that means he definitely cares about you. He sometimes leaves his things at your place as an ‘accident’ so he can come over to your place to see you and get it back.

-‘Y’ is for YUCK (what can they not stand?)

Hobie doesn’t like it when people disrespect other people’s styles, life styles or something else about someone. Tho, it does matter if that person is an absolute asshole.

-‘Z’ is for ZLEEP (how is to sleep with them?)

Except a heather hugging you while you two sleep. Hobie is a literal heather, so summers are not really an ideal time to cuddle with him while you sleep. Hobie is all over the place while he sleeps. He’s also big on cuddling while sleeping. So if it’s summer then you better expect to feel overheated while sleeping and cuddling with Hobie.

HAPPY BLACK HISTORY MONTH :)

[lemotmo]

This is what I keep coming back to as well

A. Where do you stand on the whole queerbaiting argument?

Q. In the past this show has not been guilty of queerbaiting. I do agree that Buck and Eddie have both always been queer coded characters, and I believe Eddie has always been the more queer coded of the two, but the show never really sold them or marketed them as a 'couple'. Yes they absolutely played up their pairing and popularity but never in an overtly couple way. They definitely towed the line, but they never crossed it. Also in years past the show has explicitly stated things like 'we have no plans to go there at this time', or even 'stick to fanfiction'. It was always hinted at and broached as a maybe in interviews and reviews but it was never openly discussed by the show or Oliver and Ryan as a genuine plausibility. And even though many of their scenes have felt coupley throughout the series run they always gave them love interests separate from one another. That has not been the case the last two seasons. They do not have the shield of 'we told people it wasn't happening', and 'well canonically speaking we haven't shown any indication that their more than really close friends', this time. This time if they don't do it they will absolutely be guilty of queerbaiting. It's one reason why I genuinely think they are going to pair them together.

I do think the term queerbaiting gets thrown around way too much in fandom spaces because fandoms often create ships that a show never had any plans to make canon. Marketing will absolutely play up a pairings popularity, as is the shows right, but that doesn't mean they're insinuating the show is going to do something with them from a romantic perspective. Last season, but especially so far this season, 911 has absolutely insinuated, and loudly, a romantic possibility exists between the two. Eddie has been in 90% of Buck and Tommy scenes. He's been a subject or topic in other scenes he wasn't physically present in as well. That is intentional. And while I also think fandoms give far too much credit to shows for patterns and theories that are more coincidental than anything else, some patterns and theories do feel intentional. I will fully admit that I believe the couch and lasagna theories. I also increasingly buy into the color theory because there is ample evidence that lends it validity, but most things a show can excuse away as coincidence. But you cannot excuse purposely writing a character into scenes for another couple as a coincidence. They are intentionally placing Eddie in the middle of that relationship. They have not at any time verbally discouraged or dismissed the increasingly public speculation of Buddie this time around either. And Tim, Oliver and Ryan have all had numerous opportunities to shut the speculation down. They've placed themselves in this position and they don't have plausible deniability on their side this time. Not doing it would bring warranted queerbaiting accusations and probably consequences the show wants to avoid. As I've stated numerous times, anon, the show just doesn't really have an option anymore.

Thank you Nonny!

Yes. To all of this. There is no way back from here. They need to finish this story and hopefully do it justice.

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If you are interested in more of Ali’s posts, you can find all of her posts so far under the tag: anonymous blog I love.