#BLOOD SUCKING BRADY BUNCH

[popironrye]

Power Throuple

@cryptic-michael and I have been chatting up a storm! Talking wholesome things about our favorite old man and how much more fun it is to share him.

Max doesn't get enough love from the Lost Boys fandom, so he not only gets a smoking milf girlfriend, but a dilf boyfriend as well! You can never have enough old people to love! XD

MEME

[brat-pack-it-up]

☆|| Day one of my lost boys head-canons ||☆

(Fair warning they’re random & not in order)

The frogs

• Okay for starters their parents names are Rainbow and Clive

• Rainbow was raised by hippies while Clive wasn’t raised with the lifestyle but got into it in college

• They also met in college in an english literature class

•They both dropped out at around 19 when rainbow got pregnant

•Clive was deployed in the Vietnam war until he was honorably discharged after a year

• They only really started doing drugs after he was discharged

• Rainbow has narcolepsy (part of the reason they’re sleeping in every scene)

• When rainbow isn’t high she likes to paint and bake

• Alan is 9 months older than Edgar

• Neither of them have middle names

• Edgar and Alan’s military obsession came from their dads old war story’s

• The dog tags Alan wears are their dads

• Both Edgar and Alan are horrible at customer service to the point that it’s shocking that they actually have money to eat

• The boys were homeschooled until their first year of middle school

• Until the summer before their first year of school they both had long hair, Alan’s going to his upper back and Edgar’s going to his shoulders

• they cut it in the bathroom with their dads old switch army knife

* Edgar purposely deepens his voice to sound more intimidating and only using his real voice when he gets scared, really tired, or distracted

• Together the two of them can only make 4 meals so they do rotation since their parents aren’t exactly their to feed them

• Edgar’s the “talker” between the two of them but he usually comes off more off putting

• Alan has the most delayed reflexes known to men

• The only tv shows the two watched growing up are things from the 50s-60s “blood sucking Brady bunch” “the attack of Eddie Munster”

• Edgar is obbsessed with Rambo and chuck Norris to the point it’s concerning

• Alan is the worst driver know to man when he learns

• They both flex in any reflective mirror they pass by

• They definitely share a room

• Edgar has the bed farthest from the door in case anyone breaks in

• Pinky promises are their form of sacred law

• They have their bedtime that they set up for themselves

Your honor I love them

[the-faceless-bride]

Love me, love me not...

Ahh and here we are the final chapter. It's a bit more focused on the boys and there will be two endings for you to choose from. Ngl I cried...

Tags: @thelostboysbutterfly @thelostone91 @charlizekkelly @star583 @poketnife69 @pinkchocolatcat @p1×1ebby @yor72 @mushrooms444 @bespinnn @patient1666074 @sharksarebeautiful @iloveslasher @shiningdyingmoon @vixen2383 @star583 @poisonprincess82 @eclecticpatrolroadlawyer

Tw: death, angry vampires, Marko 😔, blood, gore, alt ending...

<- part 3

You sat on your bed, skimming through your book thinking about how things have gone the past few days...

The drift from the boys... The distraction with Micheal, that girl whatever her name was...

God... The thought of them being the way they were with you broke your heart...

The boys all sat around Micheal, they had been messing with him all night.

A little payback for taking something they loved dearly... But took for granted...

They hated that they were gonna have to be brothers with this guy, they hated having to see him laugh with you when they spot you on the boardwalk, and made them want to rip their hair out watching you look around for him.

David told Marko to "get the bottle." While he stared down Micheal as Dwayne and Paul laughed at Micheal's gags as he spits out what he thought were maggots, Marko looked at David his doe eyes said all he needed to know.

Marko didn't want Micheal to be part of them, that was the last thing he wanted.

Last he saw Micheal was atop you reaching up your shirt with his tongue down your throat, but he didn't have a choice... David gives him a warning look, 'don't fuck this up...'

Marko huffs before walking away to get the blood, this sucks.

Not a moment later he hands the bottle to David; David started using his mind tricks to ease Micheal into drinking almost snapping at Star when she tried to intervene.

And just like that Micheal was on his way to being one of them.

The boys took advantage of his state running around him and shoving their shoulders into him, he didn't notice in that moment but he would feel those bruises tomorrow.

Paul paused his circling and placed a hand on Micheal's shoulders before questioning.

He asked about you and Micheal, which made everyone stop. All eyes were now on Micheal even Star was interested in the relationship between the boy she liked and the stranger the boys seemed to never stop talking about.

The boys weren't getting the answers they wanted, all Micheal would say were sluggish words of how you were fun and liked to go on rides and loved popcorn but the boys already knew all that.

But it was clear that Micheal had far too much blood to give them the answers they wanted...

Next time.

A few days have passed by and Micheal had only gotten stranger as the days went on.

He got snappy with you, shit-talked his little brother and mom, and seemed to just always be tired when you hung out together.

You didn't fully know what was happening but you could take a guess and it hurt you.

They turned Micheal? Who they barely know... But it never crossed their mind to change you?

You felt a bit betrayed... Did you really mean that little to them?

You tried not to think about it for too long and try and help Micheal as he had been getting worse.

Last thing you needed was for Micheal to lose it and hurt his family or you.

Micheal met with the boys in a secluded place on the beach where a party was taking place, this was the final step and he would be one of them.

The boys all looked between each other, this was their last chance to get answers before Max stepped in and forced them all into the vampire Brady bunch then they couldn't pick a fight to get answers without Max stepping in and that would just piss them all off.

They all taunted Micheal about his anger, his confusion, his hunger.

They all sprung into action attacking anything they saw, screams of agony and blood-curling screams were all that could be heard for miles.

Micheal had a battle with himself, he was hungry. So so hungry, but he couldn't do it.

He couldn't bring himself to hurt these poor unfortunate souls that had chosen the wrong night to party...

Michael looked up as the four bloodied boys stood over him,

"Be one of us, Micheal... You'll never grow old, never have to worry, sleep all day, and party all night." David offered, but Micheal only stared before shaking his head and David scoffed.

"You should be grateful we're offering this to you after you took what was ours..." David hissed with bitterness and Micheal looked confused, "what do you mean?" This made Dwayne huff in amusement at how dense Micheal really was and Paul rolled his eyes

And finally, it click.

Micheal said your name as if asking them if that was what they were referring to and by the way, they all tensed he was right.

"I don't know what you mean, they're cool but... We never did anything." Micheal tried explaining and that made Marko go red with anger "LIAR!"

Marko rush Micheal before any of the others could stop him, pushing Micheal to the dirty ground before getting in his face. Screaming incoherently about what he saw and how eager Micheal was and how willing you were.

"They stopped it! They didn't want to continue we didn't do anything!"

"SHUT UP!" Marko was full of conflicting emotions as were the other three, he felt so many things at the moment.

Relief, anger, denial, sadness, guilt, regret...

He was relieved you hadn't done anything with Micheal, he could finally stop having the dreadful thoughts of Micheal on top of you and pleasing you the way they had, angry that he wasn't patient and let his emotions get the better of him and didn't think rationally at the moment and he could've seen you stop and this could've been avoided, in denial that Micheal was telling the truth because if he was this was all his fault for not just waiting for a second longer instead of doubting your loyalty, sadness about how much he and the boys missed you and you missed out on so much valuable time together, guilt that he brought all his other lovers pain, regret that he and the others pushed you away instead of just... Talking to you...

Marko started heavily breathing and Paul rushed over to comfort the smaller Vampire... And Dwayne and David realized what was happening and let Micheal's words set in as they watched him run away...

What had they done?...

The boys all sat in the cave, Paul trying to calm down an overwhelmed and on the brink of tears Marko, Dwayne paced back and forth trying to think of a way to win you back and David sat in his wheelchair quietly.

David was at a loss for what to do, they had pushed you away. How would they come back to you from that?

Tell you that they felt threatened by Micheal and because Marko saw you and got upset we all questioned your loyalty but now we know you loved us as much as we loved you sorry doll?

No, that would only make them even bigger assholes...

The only thing he could think to do was just... Sit and explain everything to you... But how would they get to you without you just walking away from them after what they did to you...

"It's ok, let's just sleep on it and come up with a plan tomorrow. We can see them tomorrow." Paul said as he was trying to keep everything calm. He hated when his lovers were in distress, he just wanted to sleep and dream of you and them all snuggled together in your nest as you all did before...

They had slept in your nest a few times on particularly hard nights where they would all just hold each other telling the other that they were more than enough.

They hadn't touched or moved any of your stuff, it still smelled like you...

Yeah... Sleep on it... They could do that...

Little did they know... They had some visitors late in the day...

They all slept close to one another deep in a dream when suddenly they all woke up...

Blood... Blood everywhere.

Marko's screams were the only thing that could be heard echoing through the caves.

The boys felt as if the world had stopped...

They all jumped down to attack the younger boys who had staked Marko.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They couldn't save him... It was day. They couldn't go out. if they had caught one of the pipsqueaks they could've given Marko the blood and he could heal but... They had nothing.

They had moved a very weak and slowly dying Marko to your nest, they had nothing to save him...

By the time night hit, Dwayne was riled up ready to track them all down, Paul was rocking himself back and forth in a corner of the cave and David was hungry for their blood...

After the three vampires left, Marko was left in your nest slowly losing consciousness thinking of the last things he did with his lovers... With you...

The boardwalk, the rides, the games, the heated late nights... The way he ignored you, the way he made you cry... This was his punishment, his last moments knowing that he was wrong... He was stupid... He was sorry... And he would never get to tell you...

He heard soft shuffling around him before two warm hands laid themselves on his cold porcelain face,

"Marko?" A soft voice called

The tears from Marko's eyes finally fell, he didnt knows if this was real... But if this was the only chance he was gonna get he was gonna take it, whether it was real or not...

"Baby? I-I'm so sorry... Im sorry, Im sorry, Imsorry, ImsorryImsorrysorrysorrysorr.."

💖forgive?💖 💔Move on?💔

[marnievanhelsing]

A List of Assorted Fun Facts about my TLB OC, Leo Honda:

Blood Sucking Brady Bunch AU (vamp!Emersons plus vamp!Frog Brothers)

He's 17 (Halloween birthday!!!!)

He's double-jointed

Owned a '72 Brown Pinto named CJ that he bought himself before he had to abandon her

Possesses a meticulous map detailing the last sightings of 90% of the missing people in Santa Carla

The maps' accuracy concerns David enough that the Pack changes their hunting patterns

Btw Leo likes keeping records

Marko is trying to get him to stop keeping a notebook of the packs' escapades

David lets him do it as long as he keeps his journals in a safe place

Aroace king 👑

Numb as a brick to flirting attempts

Loves, loves, loves old movies

James Dean's biggest fan

Leo wears a red leather jacket that looks similar to Dean's in Rebel Without a Cause

When human, people called him an "Old Soul" (he had childhood trauma)

David's nickname for him is "Boy Scout" because Leo was the town good boy when they met

He still has a hard time making mischief

Guess who's Max’s favorite son (other than David, of course)

Works at the video store part time

Max let's him take home any tape he likes for helping

Leo picks older movies to the annoyance of Paul and Marko, but Dwayne and David don't mind

Really good at making mind illusions--can make a person see anything he wants

Big brother or teen mom, who knows?

Sam's favorite non-Emerson vampire

Think Steve and Dustin from Stranger Things-- that's their dynamic

Doesn't care for comic books, but indulges the Frogs on occasion

Favorite flavor of ice cream is German Chocolate

[arcaeperditaeinimicus]

LOST BOYS IS ON NETFLIX.

what a time to be alive.

[theglorydefender]

"Twilight's better than the Lost Boys lol" Well, you know, I'm not judging or anything but umm you're wrong

[a-supernatural-writer]

Watched “Love Never Dies” for the first time (the sequel to the Phantom of the Opera) and I have so many inside jokes now with my friend.

She also drew me and her as Phantom of the Opera characters…..

And now she’s drawing me, her and another friend of mine as vampires for The Lost Boys…. She just does this shit and it’s great.

[lostboysluvr]

undefined

another edit of the blood sucking Brady Bunch

my editing instagram: @/blindavis

[briarsheart]

Meet The Characters:

Fanfic: Final Girl

Fandom: Stranger Things

Pairing(s): Steve x Fem!OC , Robin x Fem!OC (eventual)

A/N: so, this fic is published and has been for some time!!! Go check it out on my wattpad if you want (my username is briarsheart but I also linked it below). Pleaseee if you have feedback or questions or even suggestions lmk!!! Xoxo, MJ

Link

Isla Weir — The Survivor

On the morning of September 8th of 1980, Isla Weir was presumed dead.

The night of November 1st of 1983, Isla Weir dragged herself from the clutches of death to the doorstep of her childhood home. The dead girl walking. Only, upon her return, another child takes her place: William Byers.

Between haunting nightmares, that aren’t really nightmares at all, and a boat load of survivors guilt, Isla learns very quickly that she’s the only one capable of preventing the disappearance of more children and teens alike. Throwing herself headfirst back into the hell dimension she tried so hard to escape from, Isla trades in her title of ‘survivor’ for the title of ‘hero’.

Birthday: February 14th, 1967 (Aquarius)

Quote(s):

“We do what we have to in order to survive. It isn’t personal.”

“I do. Because the same thing happened to me and... I’m starting to realize I don’t want it to happen to anyone else.”

“Okay, then we’ll run away to California and live with the Brady Bunch, duh.”

Theme song(s):

My Tears Ricochet by Taylor Swift

Brutal by Olivia Rodrigo

As It Was by Harry Styles

Funeral by Phoebe Bridgers

Dawn Miller — The Protector

Dawn Millers life began the moment she was dragged into the upside down; with her mother dead and her father off doing fuck knows what, she didn’t have much keeping her around. It wasn’t until the threat of a blood thirsty monster that she found her purpose. More specifically, when she stumbled upon a crying child, shaking from fear beneath a rock formation in the woods.

Isla Weir was Dawn Millers reason. Her motivation to keep fighting. her ray of hope in an otherwise dark and unforgiving dimension. For over four years she did everything in her power to keep her safe and sane. It was something she excelled at. All well searching for a way to uphold her promise to her surrogate little sister; to get Isla back into the arms of her loving family. To get her home.

Birthday: June 27th, 1963 (cancer)

Quote(s):

“What’s your favorite song? Sing it to me.”

“We’re gonna get out of here, okay? I’m gonna get you home, I promise you that.”

“Avery, I swear to god-”

Theme song(s):

Matilda by Harry Styles

Rescue by Lauren Daigle

Lean On Me by Bill Withers

Avery Fleming — The Fighter

From the moment Avery Fleming was sucked into the Hell Dimension known as the upside down, she was deemed a teenage runaway. With a bad attitude and a mean left hook to back it up, she was never anything more than a basket case. A screw up destined for failure.

But the fire that burned so fiercely in her heart proved to be her greatest strength in an alternate dimension filled with monsters out for blood. Even if it was the same thing that caused her to bump heads with Dawn Miller — the self appointed leader of their little band of lost misfit toys.

Birthday: April 8th, 1965 (Aries)

Quote(s):

“Stop feeding her fake fantasy’s Dawn! No ones coming to save us, we’re stuck here and we’re all gonna fucking die!”

“Control is a fucking fantasy.”

“You did what you had to do too survive. We all did. You shouldn’t be sorry for that.”

Theme song(s):

This Is Me Trying by Taylor Swift

Devil In Me by Halsey

Fetch The Bolt Cutters by Fiona Apple

Water Me Down by MOTHICA

Ezekiel Shaw — The Brains

Ezekiel Shaw had battled more monsters than he could count — in Dungeons and Dragons, obviously. In the real world? Hah! He couldn’t even stand up to the kids at school who relentlessly bullied him. Instead, he begged his parents to move to a different state. That was his first mistake. His second was deciding to take a nice little stroll through Hawkins on the morning of September 8th of 1979.

His wish to be free of bullies was granted when he was snatched up by a slimy, veiny monster and dragged into the pits of hell. Or, more commonly known as, the upside down. He was goner, no doubt about it. That is, if it wasn’t for his saving grace which came in the form of a pissed off teenage girl armed with nothing more than a stick; Avery Fleming.

Birthday: December 18th, 1966 (Sagittarius)

Quote(s):

“Do you know what I’d do for the monsters to go back into my stupid board game?!”

“It’s like a shark, it can smell blood.”

“We need to collect intel on this thing if it’s hunting us. We’re the ones with the brains, not the Demogorgon!”

Theme song(s):

In The End by Tommee Profitt

Fourth Of July by Sufjan Stevens

No Time To Die by Billie Eilish

Steve Harrington — The Childhood Best Friend

On the evening of September 8th of 1979, Steve Harrington lost his best friend. He remembered being twelve years old and his mother sitting him down to explain to him the concept of ‘death’. He remembered sobbing into his pillow once he understood; he’d never see Isla Weir again.

And then, he did. On the morning on November 6th his supposedly dead best friend walked into Hawkins High School. A little taller now and a hell of a lot more guarded but he still recognized her. He would know her anywhere; in death and at the end of the world. But with her return comes to cruel reality that they’re nothing more than two ghosts of the children they’d once been.

Quote(s):

“Don’t call her that. She’s not a freak.”

“You expect me to let a lady walk home alone? With all the crazies in this town? Come on, just let me drive you.”

“No, I just... everyone looked for you — I looked for you. For months. I-we were worried about you. Everyone was.”

Theme song(s):

Two Ghosts by Harry Styles

I Lost A Friend by FINNEAS

Movies by Conan Gray

Supercut by Lorde

James Weir — The Desperate Father

When Isla Weir disappeared during a game of hide and seek, James Weir lost everything. But he’d do anything to get it back. To get her back.

After six months filled with dead end leads and too many bottles of scotch to count, James stepped down from his position as chief of police. Instead, in his desperation, he sought answers from Hawkins National Laboratory. Gaining employment as a security officer, he slowly and immorally work his way up the chain of command. In his desperation he lost more than he ever bargained too; his ethics, his freedom, even his wife. All of it, gone.

But just when he was ready to dive off the deep end, follow his wife into the sweet dark abyss that was death, he got the answers he’d been searching for; his daughter was still out there — trapped in an alternate dimension. And too find her, all he had to do was sell just a little bit more of his soul to Martin Brenner.

Quote(s):

“My daughter just came back from the dead, nothing makes sense anymore.”

“They threatened Isla, Jim. Isla. They threatened her life.”

“Found you, squirt!”

Theme song(s):

I’ll Be Good by Jaymes Young

[popironrye]

Max's new date!

Ngl, I really like Judy and Max together. They're cute! :3 And Judy sure is the protective and thriving mother he's looking for. <3

Close ups!

My first attempt at drawing Max didn't exactly turn out like I hoped. 🤣

[theyreonlynoodlesmike]

It’s Just a Movie: Part 10 (Poly!Lost Boys x Fem!Reader)

<- Previous Chapter Next Chapter ->

Warnings: cursing

Word Count: 1849

You and the boys had been discussing their plan for the past two weeks, having kept track on your notes app in your phone. The first few days had just been with what their ending 'goal' was, which turned out to be harder than you thought for them to agree. Well, for you and them to agree. When you proposed their desired ending, Dwayne had quickly said,

"Kill Sam and the Frogs." And Marko was quick to second him. It seemed that neither of them were quick to forget their killers, even if you were sure the only reason Dwayne wanted the Frogs dead was because they went after Laddie. You, however, were quick to argue,

"They're kids, guys." And, before they could appall you with any loose morals, you added, "Plus, Max is gonna tell you to turn Sam, remember?" But neither of them seemed too bothered by only being able to kill the Frogs. So, you reminded them, "They haven't done anything yet. They might not even suspect vampires exist yet." You pointed out, and the boys frowned. After a few days, you got them to agree to only kill them if they attempted to kill them first. Quickly, you tried to steer them in a different direction.

It was decided fairly quickly that the boys wouldn't be able to disobey Max once he ordered them to turn the boys, and it would be near impossible to get to them beforehand. So, you suggested,

"Well, why don't we just try to make Max's plan work? I mean, it wouldn't be too bad having Lucy for a mom, right?" You offered, but the boys exchanged a glance as they mulled it over. Lucy was sweet, kind to her boys, and probably wouldn't force them to change. And, with how much freedom she gave Michael and Sam, they could imagine that their lives wouldn't be all that affected. You tried to defend her case, but, as David eloquently put, 

"That's exactly why she shouldn't end up with Max." He said, and you frowned. 

“He can’t be that bad...right?” But even you didn’t really know. You remembered the ending, where he didn’t even bat an eye, let alone shed a tear, at the death of one of his ‘sons’. Without missing a beat, Paul said, 

“He’s a dick.” You expected a slap of the head from Dwayne or a look from David. When neither came, you let out an uneasy breath. So, it seemed that Max's 'Blood-sucking Brady Bunch' was out of the question. When you pushed the topic of Max, it was decided that perhaps his ending shouldn't be all that changed. By the end of the first couple of days, it was decided that Max would die, and that David would take his place as the head vampire. You had to admit that it seemed to make more sense, with how detached the boys already were from their sire. And because it had technically been Maxs fault for their deaths in the first place. But, making sure Max bit it and they didn't was definitely going to make things more difficult. Especially when you factored in Star and Laddie. 

“Wait, why are we turning Star again?” Marko asked. It was a couple days later and the five of you were eating pizza in the cave, having already visited the boardwalk. You, Marko, and Paul sat on the floor while Dwayne laid sprawled out on the couch and David sat in his chair. You were revisiting your ideas for how they were going to change the future, and you were doing a rebriefing of what the five of you had agreed on. Really, with having been there for two weeks, it was the only thing to keep your mind off of the improbability of you ever going home.

“She’s the one that’s gonna lure Michael in.” Paul reminded him, reaching over to snag one of your fries. You batted his hand away, and he gave you a grin as he popped it into his mouth. Marko scoffed, shaking his head.

“And why do we need to lure him in again? I mean, we already saw how that goes.” He grumbled, and you tried to choose your words carefully. He was always a little tense during these discussions, as his death would be the first you’d need to avoid.

“If we stray too far from the movie, then we have no idea how the events will turn out. And no idea how to prevent any near-death experiences.” You reminded. It was the exact reason that you had crossed out the potential of keeping the Emersons away completely. “We’re only gonna change some minor things, so Michael still needs to be turned into a half for everything to work.” You said calmly, and he let out a long sigh. He pushed the pizza box away from him, and your fries away from you before he laid your head in your lap. Over the past week, the boys had gotten comfortable with you. Almost a little too comfortable. While you hadn’t done anything with any of them yet, platonic affection didn’t seem to bother any of them. Even if Paul constantly offered otherwise. You already knew what he expected, and you gently began twirling his curls and scratching his scalp.

“But he’s such a poser.” Marko said, and you couldn’t help your smile at the use of slang. Your mind instantly flashed to when he bought the leather jacket, and then the earring. He seemed to try so hard to fit in, or perhaps impress, that you hadn’t even considered that that might describe him perfectly. You watched as his face relaxed, his eyes fluttering closed as you used your nails to scratch one of his sweet spots.

“Yeah, but he’ll be human again when Grandpa kills Max, and then you won’t have to worry about him anymore.” You said, and you didn’t notice the small smile on David’s face as he watched you calm the blonde vampire. Marko let out another sigh, before wriggling his way further into your lap. He let out a small grunt, apparently satisfied enough to stop his arguing. For the meantime. After a moment, you added, “Plus, you won’t have to watch Laddie all the time with Star.” You said, giving Dwayne a look. He had been reading a book, and he perked up at the mention of the little boys name. When he looked over and saw that you were already looking at him, he was quick to look back down at the piece of literature in his hands. Paul let out a small snicker, and you smiled.

You knew that, while he would never admit it, Dwayne was eager to meet the little boy that had become so close to him during the movie. It was like he was awaiting the birth of his younger brother, even if the little boy was already walking around somewhere. Though, you and David had silently agreed not to discuss the fate of the young boy. While the five of you could plan your ideal ending all you wanted, the most important thing was being able to roll with the punches and to be realistic. And, well, Laddie had stuck to Star more than he had stuck to the brunette haired boy. 

With keeping most of the story-line and only a fraction of the ending the same, there was only one part of your plan left undecided. 

“So, how are you gonna stop Sam from coming down here with the Frogs?” You asked. There was, of course, the expected chorus of,

“Kill the frogs.” From Dwayne and Marko. It was a frequently revisited issue, and the five of you had yet to agree. You had to make sure you spent their nights with them after Paul, surprisingly, had suggested finding their comic book store earlier that week. But, before you could argue your usual point over again, David said,

“We don’t have to kill them. We don’t even have to stop Sam from meeting them.” And you were quick to arch a brow. Paul let out an audible,

“Huh?” And Marko and Dwayne both sat up to look at their leader. It was an undiscussed idea, but, from the way David said it, you guessed that he’d been sitting on it for a few days now. It seemed that whatever ideas he had, he was finally willing to share them. He took a drag of his cigarette, before he began to elaborate. 

“You said it yourself, y/n. We can’t risk going too far from the movie. We just have to make sure that Sam and the Frogs think that Max is the head vampire, and a few other things.” He added the last part vaguely, and you stared at him. With the way the edges of his lips curled, you were positive he was leaving you in suspense on purpose. You sighed, giving him a look. Finally, you asked,

“Like what?” And you watched the way his smile grew. He seemed to love whenever you gave in to his egging, and he supplied you with,

“Like thinking that by killing him it’ll turn all his children back to being human. Including us.” He said, and you felt your jaw fall for a moment before you quickly recovered. You didn’t want to inflate his ego, even if he already looked immensely satisfied with your reaction. Paul let out a low whistle before he said,

“Shit. That’s perfect. Michael will totally-”

“He’ll treat us like Star and Laddie. Same with Sam.” Marko finished for him, even if Paul went on rambling. He rambled about how they could blame the murders on vampire instinct, lack of human memory, or play into the thirst for sympathy. Or how they could make it almost hero-like by saying they only went after assholes. Dwayne, his deep voice cutting through Pauls chatter, said, 

“And Grandpa won’t go after us. Not if we could be saved.” And you stared at all of them. It was a good plan. A great one. But, you could only think of one fatal flaw in it, and it was staring you in the face. 

“Do you really expect them to believe you though?” You asked David. No matter how charming they could be, you didn’t expect them to really be that stupid. And it wasn’t something that they could just naturally bring up to Star and Michael without it raising some sort of suspicion from the pair. Especially when the Frogs were so hell-bent on killing all vampires, even if said vampire was only a half and a child. Davids smile turned into a smirk, and he gave you a small shake of his head as he said,

“Oh, not at all.” And confusion filled your face. You stared at the pale boy, his stubble dusting his cheeks and his hair practically glowing in the light. The smoke from the end of his cigarette curled and floated towards the ceiling as he said, “I expect them to believe you.”

[canary3d-obsessed]

Restless Rewatch: The Untamed Episode 11 second part

(Masterpost) (Other Canary Absurdity) 

Warning: Spoilers for All 50 Episodes!

Message from the Lan Clan

After dinner the Yunmeng bros go to talk to Jiang Fengmian in his study. They're quiet and respectful here, with no shoulder-shoving or arguing. This scene has such Brady Bunch energy, where Dad's Study is the Man Place where boys come to talk about Serious Things.

The boys tell Dad Jiang about the Yin Iron and he says yeah, I know. This is probably why he let them run off on their road trip without punishing them, but he could have, like, shared data with them so they might have actually achieved something related to the Yin Iron, rather than just wandering around the countryside bonding with Lan Wangji and Nie Huaisang.

He shows them a letter from the Lans that basically says the Lan Clan is in the shit, and he tells them they've got to go to the Wen indoctrination because otherwise they will also be in the shit. 

He gives the boys a warning about the Yin Iron, which is that 

1. it can be refined and 

2. if you refine it carefully, it will not control you. 

Awesome tip, will definitely use, thanks pop.

(more behind the cut)

Jiang Cheng wants to argue about going to the Wen party, but Wei Wuxian vocally gets on board, not leaving any opportunity for whining. 

Wei Wuxian is only sucking up a little bit in this scene. He obviously has a lot of affection for Jiang Fengmian, but WWX doesn't play up to his favoritism nearly as much as he could. Compare, for example, how he leans into Yanli's preferential treatment of him.  

Fight Outside the Cold Cave

Over on the Gusu side of the country province township, the disciples have gathered outside the cold cave that previously none of them knew about, and Su She is freaking out. 

Most of the acting in The Untamed is naturalistic, but then there are occasional characters who are portrayed with a much more theatrical, broad style. Su She's villainy is not given a lot of layers; he's playing a type, more than a person.

Many of the villains in The Untamed are played this way, but not all. Wen Zhuliu, for example, is a genuinely horrifying bad guy while also conveying depth and ambivalence--despite having hardly any lines. And JGY is a masterpiece of a performance. For Su She, the directors or the actor have opted for "sniveling backstabber" as a type, which is unfortunate, because it robs his final scenes of emotional impact.

Lan Qiren tells the disciples to get to safety. He rushes forward, gamely getting his ass kicked by human cuisinart Wen Xu.  He's not as effective a warrior as either of his nephews but he's a brave S.O.B.

Hanguang Jun to the Rescue

Before things can go completely pear-shaped, Lan Wangji sails in with his guqin.

The Blue Steel technique of the Lan Clan

Like many gifted learners, Lan Wangji's musical abilities are more advanced than his social skills. Here he musically makes the ground literally explode, almost as if it had been specially rigged with incendiary charges.  

Lan Wangji is very pretty when he's worried, and his affection and concern for his uncle is touching. He's 100% not interested, as we will see, in Lan Qiren's whole "lets all die for the future of the Lan Clan while my nephews hide" agenda. He's on his own agenda of smiting the wicked and protecting the weak.

Notice how Su She is standing right next to Lan Qiren here, even holding his arm? The next thing that Lan Qiren says is to tell all the disciples to keep up as they run into the cave. Somehow Su She totally does not keep up, and he gets caught outside along with a bunch of other disciples.

Giving Up

Wen Xu and his men kill most of the other caught disciples, and then threaten Su She, asking him how to get into the cave. In fear for his life, he tells them. Not cool, Su She, but possibly forgivable. Although when you voluntarily join a, you know, battle cult, physical courage is kind of an important qualifier.

But this shit here...

They didn't fucking ask about the books, douchebag.  

Su She was there in Lan Qiren's house when the two heads of his clan knelt to each other, each claiming the right to be the one to stay behind and die. And he heard Lan Qiren say that the ancient books are the foundation of the clan and that only if LXC and the books survive, will the clan continue. By giving up both men, and pointing out the book situation, Su She has totally earned his expulsion. 

Lan Wangji Takes a Stand

Lan Wangji decides, for the first but not last time, to openly defy his uncle...and it's got nothing to do with Wei Wuxian. Lan Wangji is a hero, who follows the dictates of his conscience. His conscience is extremely filial and extremely orthodox, but he’s got a growing open-minded streak.  This is going to cause a whole lot of conflicts for him over the next few years.

This time, however, he manages to skate out from under the whole disobedient, unfilial thing by citing Lan Yi's directive, which means Lan Qiren has to accept it because she's his predecessor and elder relative (She is probably not a literal ancestor, since she spent her life in a cave putting fucking headbands on fucking rabbits which probably didn’t leave time for having babies).

This is a pretty extraordinary moment for Lan Wangji and for Lan Qiren, because Lan Wangji just asserted his own form of authority to do the exact opposite of what Lan Qiren wanted, and Lan Qiren just sucked it up and let him.

It's also very different from western stories involving a holy McGuffin such as the Yin Iron. Lan Wangji's solution of "fuck it, just let the bad guys have it, it's not worth so many people dying for" is refreshing and surprising to me, a westerner raised on The One Ring, the Grail, the Death Star Plans, etc.

Lan Wangji steps out of the cave and uses a sword blast to save Su She, the ungrateful bastard, from getting stabbed by Wen Xu. Then he surrenders, and they break his leg to slow him down. This does not actually incapacitate him, because he is Lan Fucking Wangji, already a BAMF at like 17 years old. When they whack his leg, his chunk of Yin Iron falls out onto the ground.

That thing was in a magic bag of holding before. So...it just falls out when you whack him? If they whack him again will his guqin fall on the ground? What about candy?

Archery Practice at Lotus Pier

Meanwhile, back at Lotus Pier, the brothers are enjoying some quality time together before they head to the hostage-taking indoctrination.

Wei Wuxian is such a great cultivator that he can hit a distant target even when he jerks his bow upwards as he releases the arrow.

Jiang Cheng seems fairly pleased, and proud of his brother. He's competitive and fundamentally grumpy but not, at least here, a sore loser.

Club Ruohan

We go over to Da Club, where Wen Ruohan is yelling at Wen Qing for letting Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian go. He names them both, so they're becoming more and more known to their enemies. Which is not a good thing.

He menaces her with the zombie mosh crew, having them kill a dude in front of her and then saying her baby brother will be next in the circle of zombies if she tries any more stunts. Neither of them can imagine how much zombie ass her baby brother is going to kick, later in his (un)life.

Side note: What is up with WRH’s hair? Why bother pulling your hair up over your ears if you're going to leave an enormous curtain of it over your face? It's because he knows there's a wind machine next to his throne, isn’t it?

Leaving Lotus Pier

Jiang Cheng: when I ran off earlier in the year on my road trip you didn't pack a goddamn thing.

Wen Indoctrination

Is it even possible to stand next to this much active volcanic shit and not, uh, die? I live in the tornado part of the US so I don't know much about lava (yet. 2020 still has 2 months to go). But it seems like it would be hard to breathe the air. Also they appear to build houses on lava piles, which seems imprudent.  I say that even as someone who plays The Elder Scrolls Online, which is full of lava towns and nonsense like “ash farming.”

Nie Huaisang is adorable at all times, but particularly here, when he's so happy to see his friend who *didn't* fuck his gege and then abandon him without an explanation. 

Nie Huaisang: I'm so glad I can count on Wei-Xiong to be consistent and not vanish for months, or become a traumatized shell of his former self, or, like, horribly die.

Jin Zixuan isn't quite as happy to see Wei Wuxian.

Wen Chao enjoys the sound of his own voice way too much, and is malevolent and boring. On the plus side, he likes to stand with his hand stuck out in the air, which is fun for your resident photoshopper.

Nie Huaisang is so miserable every time he's holding a sword, or blade, or whichever we're supposed to call this. He's got his fan tucked into his belt, which is sweet. He is happy to give up his sword but don't you dare try to take his fan.

Meanwhile Wei Wuxian is worried about Lan Wangji, and Jiang Cheng isn't.

Lan Wangji shows up under guard, and takes his position at the front of the line, but without any extra disciples. The Wens let him change into snowy white robes after breaking his leg which will go well with arterial blood spray. He's focused and is determined not to interact with Wei Wuxian in this public context.

When I was little, I would sit near my best friend at church on Sunday, but not be allowed to talk to her until church was over, and it was exactly like this. She was good at churching and I was hyper and hated church. We are still best friends and these things are still true.

This interaction is like a thumbnail for the whole dynamic of these three boys: Lan Wangji outwardly ignoring Wei Wuxian while having many interior feelings about him; Wei Wuxian demanding attention and creating a bit of a scene, due to his very genuine caring; Jiang Cheng telling him to leave that boy alone for fuck's sake.

Lan Wangji: Stop trying to talk to me Wei Ying, I’m busy composing a song in my head about the two of us and our love for each other. 

[bonniebird]

Jacob x Reader

Requested by @izzytheninja​

Halloween 2020 Masterlist

Halloween 2020 event rules

Halloween Prompt list

Jacob glanced away from your car as Edward pulled up. “That’s weird.”

“What is?” He asked, looking back at you as Bella and Edward said goodbye.

“It’s like a custody drop off.” You mumbled and he rolled his eyes.

“Whatever works for them I guess.”

“That’s another thing.” You muttered. While you’d known about the wolves for a long time it had only been recently that you’d found out about the vampires, at least the family that lived in the adjacent woods to you. You’d had no idea that they lived so close. You knew Jacob well enough to trust the wolves he introduced you to. But the vampires made you nervous “They’re not related but they live together… like one big family?”

“Yeah, pretty much.” Jacob answered. He could hear some of the pack lurking in the woods. You’d been about to drive home when Edward pulled up and Jacob didn’t exactly trust Edward enough to rush you off on your own.

“Great! The blood-sucking Brady Bunch!” You said to him. He laughed, glancing at Bella and Edward, the later of whom was glaring your way. “Anything else I need to know about? Toilet alligators?”

“Nope. Just the werewolves and the vampires so far.” Jacob said, still laughing as he shut your door and leant in the window. “I’ll let you know as soon as something does pop up.”

“If something pops up…. if Jacob! What do you mean as soon as something pops up!?” You called as he started to walk away, waving at you as he jogged over to Bella. She smiled and waved at you, casting once more glance over at Edward who glared at you once more before hurtling off down the road.

[yogpetshame]

I don't know if this is much of a hot take, but it's always felt strange that the yogs as a whole lean so heavily on merchandising when there are so many obvious legal issues involved. They've only ever had one or two actually original ideas (now mostly distant memories) and everything else relies on intellectual properties owned by major companies. Which is fine, plenty of people do that, but they don't then slap it on a shirt under a different name like it's a dollar store knock-off.

It's a little ridiculous. The first time anyone plays TTT they grab a ripped model from the menu and have a fun blushing moment, "I'm Clem! Clementine from the Walking Dead! With a shotgun!!" But a year in when they're selling merch they should have considered that, going back to the pins again

They've got Disney on there four times. Mattel owns Thomas the Tank Engine. Capcom, Konami, Finji, Enthusiast Gaming (The Escapist), and Viz Media are in there. Katy Perry is even in there.

NITW (owned by Finji) strikes me as the worst of the bunch, certainly Disney owned properties are bigger threats, but ever since that incident I don't think unlicensed NITW merch is in great taste. It's like watching a guy... well, die, and then extending a very long curly straw and sucking his blood from afar.

If they had any sense or... I don't know, paid artists full time to do such things, they would have created fully original models so that their branding isn't so fucked. It could've been seasonal even. Fantasy outfits for a year. Sci Fi outfits the next year. Something smart.

At least Brady J. Harty is on the job now. He's already working on a not-Riker model for Lewis, let's see if he can fathom making something that's not a homage, parody, or caricature for the others.

[sowithout]

if anyone wants my discord its the blood-sucking brady bunch#0666