#BG3!Agi

[theshotsheardacrossworlds]

Glamour

In which Gale comes clean to Agnes "Agi" Wildheart about a glamour he uses. SFW.

“Knock, knock!”

Gale smiled to himself as he shut the book he was reading. Sitting in his tent, he had been anticipating the arrival of his lady. My lady. My sweet, talented, beautiful, amazing, kind…did I mention sweet? “Come in, darling!”

Agnes Wildheart peeked her head through the folds of the tent opening and grinned. “Hi, love. I have a surprise for you!” Closing the tent flaps, she walked to him and kissed him softly before taking something out of one of her many pockets. “Ta-da! Someone had some Waterdhavian chocolate, so I bartered some stuff I had lying around for it. I thought we might share.” Holding out the chocolate bar, her expression was bright as usual.

Unfortunately, the same could not be said for Gale. I love chocolate. I love her. I would love her covered the richest chocolate imaginable and lick it off her body, but… He put on his best fake smile and waved a hand. “How kind and thoughtful, my dear! However, I think you should have it yourself. You deserve it. A worthy treat for a beautiful lady!”

She raised an eyebrow. “But I want to share with you, love.”

No, you don’t. I don’t bloody need it. What I am going to need is another pair of trousers soon. They’re already so tight, and she’ll think I’m just—

Her smile turned into a frown. “Hey, are you okay? I can go if you want to be alone—"

“No, no! It’s not that. I want you…here with me! Yes, with me here! Us! Together!” Try to sound less desperate, man! He rubbed a hand through his hair. “I…” You need to tell her. Sooner or later, she’ll find out especially if we…you know… Gale motioned to the other chair in the tent. “Please.”

Agnes sat warily in the chair, still holding the chocolate. “Did I…did I do something wrong?”

Shit. He offered a reassuring smile. “No. You’ve done nothing wrong. Me, however…” Chuckling nervously, he felt his heart beating through his chest. “Well, a question for you, Agi---what do you know of glamours?”

She wrinkled her nose, her frow burrowed. “Glamours to change appearance? I casted one for a friend a while back for a theater production they were in.” Her eyebrow raised once more. “Why?”

Because I’m a weak and vain man. A hand traveled to his earring. “You see this isn’t just a very fashionable piece of jewelry, my dear.” He smiled ruefully as he touched it. I’m sorry. I’ve lied to you enough, and now here’s another fucking lie.

The glamour shimmered away.

Gale’s gaze was fixed upon Agnes.

“Sorry, was it supposed to do something?”

Gale blinked. “What?! Don’t you see?!”

Agnes squinted. “Well…you certainly filled your tunic, love…and your pants…and your hair is a bit grayer…” Her smile returned, her free hand touching one of his. “Still very handsome, if I do say so myself.”

Did she…No, she can’t have. But I think she did!!! Gale laughed nervously, bringing her hand to his lips. “My lady, you’re full of boundless kindness shown towards such an undeserving fool…” He had not noticed her put the chocolate on the side table, nor did he notice her move until she was standing in front of him, her face meeting his.

He did notice her kissing him. A slow, passionate kiss that Gale happily remembered they shared the previous night at sunset. His hands found their way to her wide, soft hips, while hers cupped his face.

“Gale love, look at me. Look at me.” She whispered, thumbs caressing his cheeks.

“If the lady commands.” He chuckled, his eyes now meeting hers. We both have brown eyes. Can’t believe I didn’t notice that before.

“My love, I’m not angry about the glamour. I’m not angry at you. I’m just angry you felt like you had to do this in the first place.” She gave him a quick peck on the lips before continuing. “I’ve been teased about being bigger ever since I was a little girl. I didn’t think anyone would love me after a ‘friend’ humiliated me when I asked him out. But when I told Mum, she looked at me and said, ‘Agi, if they can’t love you inside and out, then they’re not worth it.’ And that’s stuck with me ever since. I love you, Gale---inside and out. I meant what I said about you still being very handsome.” Her cheeks turned bright pink, something Gale discovered quickly that he enjoyed. Such a pretty blush on a pretty woman. “And I bet you’re great to snuggle with—OH!”

I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. He kissed her soundly and held her against him. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. “I love you.” He huffed, his forehead touching hers. “You’re a marvel, you know that?”

Wrinkling her nose, she giggled. “The Wizard of Waterdeep telling a sorceress of Baldur’s Gate that she’s a marvel? I’ll need to note the day and time for future reference.”

Gale barked a laugh. “No need. I’ll simply tell you every moment of every day, darling.” I love you. I love you. I love you so fucking much.

“If you do, then I’ll die of embarrassment.” Laughing softly, she kissed him. “But truly, you are handsome, and for a man nearing his forty-first birthday,” oh dear, her cheeks are red now. “You’re very sexy.” Ah, tomato red!

Gale’s eyes twinkled as he tickled her sides softly. “And for a lady just past her twenty-fifth birthday, you’re simply perfect.”

Giggling, Agnes lightly smacked his arm. “You’re also quite naughty, love. Come on, let’s have some chocolate and a cuddle.” She picked up the bar and sat on the bedroll, tapping the spot next to her.

“There’s nothing I’d like more, my dear.”

Gale stood.

RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!

Agnes’s eyes widened.

Fuck my life.

“Oh dear, where those your pants? Don’t worry, I’ll make note that we need to pick some up next time we find a trader or inn or some shit.” She took out a small notebook, one Gale knew she used for inventory, and wrote it down. She smiled reassuringly at him. “All good.” She pat the spot next to her again. “Gale love?”

“One moment.” He undid his trousers and got them off, tossing them on the far side of the tent. Goodness, she looks like she wants to devour me. A smirk tugged at his lips. Nothing wrong with some flirting. I know she loves it. “Does the lady want the shirt removed as well?” He winked. Especially since she likes all of this!!!

Agnes nodded wordlessly, watching Gale in wonder.

Well, here goes nothing. He pulled the shirt over his head and then sat next to her on the bedroll. “What does the lady think?” Gale whispered, leaning into her ear.

With a gulp, Agnes nodded again. “Y-yes, very good.” She looked at him intensely, seemingly drinking him in. Raising a hand, she appeared as if she would reach out and touch him but stopped. “I had no idea you’re so hairy.” She said, a small smile on her lips. “That didn’t show up when we…erm, you know…had magic sex.”

He chuckled. “Magic sex is certainly an accurate way to describe the lovemaking we did in the stars, and yes, I am quite hairy.” Fuck, does she hate it? All signs point to no but let her answer. “Do you…?”

She quickly shook her head. “No! I mean, I like it. A lot. Makes you even hotter actually.” OH?!?!?! Her face was turning bright red. “I mean, you’re still really hot without it! And with it! And just…oh sod it.” Agnes opened the chocolate bar and shoved a piece in her mouth, causing Gale to laugh.

He shifted on the bedroll to be against her and pulled her into a hug. “I must say, darling, you’re very adorable when you’re flustered! I should do that more often!” Not all the time. Don’t want her to think I’m actually teasing her. I can’t hurt her…even a little. It would break my heart. Pressing a kiss to her red hair, he rocked her gently. “How’s the chocolate, my love?”

Swallowing, she sighed happily. Always a good sign. “So fucking good. Sometimes you just need some chocolate, you know?”

Gale gave an affirmative hum as Agnes broke a piece and held it up for him. As he bit into the chocolate, he recognized the taste immediately. Oh fuck yes. Master chocolatier Andresson’s handiwork. My favorite. And Agi likes it too. I’ll make sure we always have some at home…hold on, Gale. She may not want to continue this after our little adventure or may want to stay in Baldur’s Gate. Her whole life is there---family, friends, her puppy…

“A-are you sure you’re not tired? I could go, love.” Her worried voice brought him out of his increasingly depressing thoughts.

He closed his eyes. “Thinking too much.” Again. Always. Constantly.

Agnes turned a little in his arms so that she was not facing away from him. A hand began stroking the thick dark hair on his chest. “Stay here with me, love. Stay in the moment, Gale. Just think about us, right here, right now…everything’s okay. We’ve having a cuddle and some chocolate.” She murmured softly. “Want some more chocolate, love?” She offered him a piece, which he took and ate. Suddenly, her eyes widened. “I have an idea! Lay down and close your eyes!”

“O-oh? What—” Before he knew it, Agnes was laying down on the bedroll and looking at him expectantly. I suppose I better get right to it then. Can’t keep the lady waiting! He did as he was told and closed his eyes. “What do you have planned, my sweet sorceress?”

He could hear her smirking. “You’ll see, love.”

The air is filled with magic.

Her magic.

Wild.

Untamed.

Like her beautiful curls. Gods, how I love running my fingers through her hair.

“You can open your eyes now.” Agnes said in a soft whisper.

Gale could not stop the massive grin that appeared on his face when he opened his eyes. The ceiling of the tent was enchanted to look like a snowy winter night.

“It’s not nearly as impressive as when you changed the entire night sky, but I still think this is a good first attempt.” She said with a self-satisfied smile.

“First attempt?! Are you telling me, darling, that you’ve never done this before…just now?!” Gale sputtered.

Agnes wrinkled her nose and giggled. Gods, she’s so cute when she does that. “Well, erm…yes? I thought it would be nice to try to do. Make it even more romantic, but I didn’t want to copy what you did.” She turned onto her side and snuggled against Gale’s large hairy but apparently appealing belly. “I remembered when Mum and I went to see some relations up north, and there was a festival of some sort going on. It was snowing. People were everywhere having a great time. Lots of hot cocoa and tasty snacks. Children were ice skating…and I thought…maybe we could go sometime.” She’s touching my chest again. Goodness, she really does think I’m attractive. “I mean, that’s if you want to continue this when this is all over.” She added quickly, her eyes darting downwards.

Wrapping an arm around her shoulder, Gale laughed heartily. “You needn’t worry about that, my dear! I’m afraid you’re stuck with this fool.”

Did I think I would find love with a beautiful dwarven sorceress while we both have tadpoles in our heads and I have a bomb in my chest?

Absolutely not.

Was I surprised that I found love with the loveliest dwarven sorceress with all the above happening?

Oh yes. Definitely.

Am I ecstatic that she loves me and wants this to continue?

YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Giggling, she planted multiple kisses on his chest. “Well, that means you’re stuck with my fat ass.” She stopped, a smirk appearing on her lips. “You hear that Mystra? He loves my fat ass, and I love his! He’s mine now, so fuck off!”

***

After an amazing, romantic night, Gale applied the glamour. We talked about it. She said I can do whatever I feel comfortable with. I said I would be fine with keeping the glamour on around others, but when we’re alone, it’s off. As he opened the flaps of his tent, Astarion stopped his conversation with Halsin.

The vampire grinned, his fangs shining in the sun.

“So Gale, when are you proposing to dear Agi?”

“I-I beg your pardon!”

Halsin’s eyes went from Astarion to Gale and back again.

“My good man, if a woman told my deity to fuck off and that I belonged to her now, I would be buying a ring at dawn!”

When things are settled, I will.

Before Gale could response, Agnes (her face is as red as a tomato) smacked Astarion on the arm. “You naughty man! Gale can propose to me whenever he wants!” OH?!?!!?!?! Then I will write to Mother’s favorite jeweler immediately. “Now, months from now, years—”

“Not years, darling.” Gale snarked, pouring a cup of honestly not bad coffee.

Most of their comrades laughed as Agnes walked by Gale to pour herself some coffee. He always noticed the little full of love for me looks she gave him including one right now. He felt a wriggling in his head. His gaze locked onto hers.

I’d marry you tomorrow if I could, love. I honestly thought no one would be interested in me as a person, as Agi, because they know my last name. They know my mother is Countess Luci Wildheart, head of the Wildheart Ironworks. But you were…are! Oh goodness, you are interested in me and not only that—

Interested?! Darling, I love you.

Right yes! Sorry was getting to that. Anyways, you love me for me, and I love you for that.

I could say the same for you. Not interested in my power, my supreme command of magic, my boundless intellect—

Gale.

Of course! You love me the man---flawed, hairy, and—

Incredibly sexy!

So you say, dearest.

The connection between the tadpoles was severed just as Wyll began speaking to Agnes. He smiled to himself as he imagined him romancing her at that winter festival and picked up not one but two butter rolls.

If she doesn’t mind it…likes it even…then so do I.

[theshotsheardacrossworlds]

Thanks so much for tagging me @grenanigans! <3

1. Quickie---an Erenville/reader fic I wrote for an exchange that's very much NSFW (FFXIV)

2. Cheating a bit here but Temper and Turn a Blind Eye are two fics that go together. They're the stories of how Agi's birth parents met their not at all pleasant ends. (FFXIV)

3. A Knight and His Lady---Haurchefant. An unnamed female Warrior of Light. Tons of glorious smut. (FFXIV)

4. Hibernation in which Annie (half-elf sorcerer version of my WOL Agi) and Halsin deal with his upcoming hibernation set post-game. NSFW. (BG3)

5. Body in which Agnetha (the human version of my WOL Agi) expresses her worries with Astarion over whether or not he finds her desirable. (BG3)

Honorable mention: Beard because it's just Agi wanting to bang her man with a beard lmao (FFXIV)

Tagging @dhampling @necromeowncy @weather-maiden @kootiepatra @quinn-borel

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 💗

* sweats profusely trying to find even 3 I like never mind 5 * I am truly my biggest critic. So this was actually hard lol. But. Yeah here they are. And thank you for sending!

Apartment 342 ( Tess Servopoulos x reader )

I like any fic where I can get into Tess’ head a bit. And I’m pretty sure this fic was my first proper go at that.

The forbidden fruit ( Arthur Morgan x Reader )

A fic that I love simply because writing it came so easy. I had so much motivation and writing flow. And I love to be descriptive when it comes to emotions and feelings and this was perfect for that.

Muse ( Remus Lupin x Nymphadora Tonks )

I look back on a lot of my Remadora fics now and don’t like them simply because I have improved a whole lot since then. Found my style and continue to work on it yk. But this truly was one of my fav things I ever wrote for them. I never really liked the idea of non magic aus but yeah. I really liked this.

You sunshine, you temptress ( Tess Servopoulos x reader )

Again I love getting into Tess’ head. I channeled a lot of myself into Tess with this one and I know it flopped ridiculously hard but I do adore this fic. Exploring a new side of Tess and also just making her vulnerable for once.

And she would rescue me ( Tess Servopoulos x reader )

Another lil peak into Tess’ head. Idk why I like this one I just do. The developing relationship and the not so happy ending. Idk. I like it.

I nominate @devnmon @celestemagnoliathewriter @queer-sadie-adler @xthescarletbitch + anyone who feels like it!

No pressure to do it tho ✨

[theshotsheardacrossworlds]

Jealousy

Fill for #7 on this list featuring poor Rolan watching his fiancée get hit on at a ball. He decides to do something about it. NSFW.

“Rolan, at least try to smile, sweetie.” His fiancée’s mother lightly chided the Master of Ramazith’s Tower. He, Amelie, and her mother were attending yet another boring ball hosted by idiots. He was already in a sour mood when they arrived. There’s been a setback in repairing the glass observation dome at the tower. There was a parade of rude customers in the shop today. These new dress boots are hurting my damn feet. The wine here is piss.

But then he saw something that made him seethe.

His beautiful, perfect fiancée was speaking to a human noble who was standing too close.

Too, too close.

Amelie very clearly knew the gentleman, chuckling softly at something he said.

He had not felt it in the months, not since their engagement was announced and her companions went their separate ways.

A dark, ugly feeling in the pit of his stomach.

She is mine. MINE.

“Rolan, there’s…oh dear. Off he goes.” The countess laughed, shaking her head, watching her future son-in-law stride with purpose across the ballroom.

Heart pounding in his chest, Rolan downed the rest of his wine and placed the chalice on a tray before resuming his mission.

Yes, mission.

To save my beloved from…someone she knows and is happily speaking to.

Turning her head, the half-elf caught his glance and grinned. “Oh Stannik, this is my fiancé Rolan—”

He as discreetly as possible wrapped an arm around her ample waist, his hand resting on a hip. “I don’t mean to interrupt,” he began as politely as possible. “But may I borrow you, my dear?”

Borrow.

As if I should have to borrow my future wife from an ingrate like this “Stannik.”

As if I should have to be gracious when he was CLEARLY flirting with her.

As if I should have to be a gentleman at all times…

Unaware of her fiancée’s inner turmoil, Amelie smiled at him. “Of course, love.” She looked at the human and nodded. “Please excuse me.”

Pleasantries out of the way FINALLY, Rolan guided her out of the ballroom.

“Rolan, is something wrong?”

There must be a private room somewhere…

“Are you alright, love?”

I am FINE AND DANDY, sweetling.

There!

He hastily unlocked the door, which turned out to be a washroom. Both now inside, he locked the door.

For privacy, of course.

Amelie barely opened her mouth before his lips crashed into hers.

Mine.

Mine.

My Amelie.

She is mine.

All mine.

Forever mine.

My intellect, my talent, my heart, my soul, my body…all belong to her.

She is mine as I am hers.

Breaking the kiss and completely breathless, she placed her hands on his shoulders. “Rolan, what has gotten into you?”

He truly wished to say, “You.”

Instead, he huffed, “He was flirting with you, Mia! And I was standing across the room! Watching him! Flirt with you!” His hands stayed firmly on her hips, which he noticed were fuller than they were previously. She told me yesterday that she’s the happiest she’s ever been. Happy and content with our life together.

She blinked. “Was he?”

Rolan groaned. “Darling, really!”

“How was I supposed to know? He’s always been nice to talk to at these things, but I never thought he would flirt with me.” She frowned. “I’m sorry?”

FUCK.

You idiot.

You fool.

You utter swine!

“No, no, no darling. That’s not what I meant. I’m not blaming you in the slightest. I simply—”

A manicured nail touched his lips, silencing him. Any trace of sadness and confusion in her golden eyes was gone and replaced with amusement. And lust. Gods. “You simply wished to remind Stannik that I’m your fiancée and not his? That I’m going to marry you and not him?” She closed the admittedly small gap between them, her body flushed against his. Hands once again on his shoulders, her lips curled into a smile. More like a smirk, you saucy little— “That I’ve given you my all and not him?”

He nodded. “Y-yes.”

“Did you want to take me in the middle of the ballroom, my love?” she whispered against his lips. “Scream that I’m your Mistress of Ramazith’s Tower?” Amelie captured him in a quick kiss before she let out a squeak as he gripped her hips and forced her backwards against the sink.

Chuckling heartily, Rolan pawed at the hem of her gown. A light and airy rose pink gown with various embroidered summer flowers. Another piece from Astarion. “No, but I do want to take you here, sweetheart.” He began to pull at her smalls, getting off and placing them on the counter. He then grunted as he undid his trousers. “Going to show you…how much I…” How much I love you. How much I desire you. How much I need you.

Bringing his face to hers, she kissed him slowly as he lined himself to her entrance, gasping at how bloody wet she is. Zurgan, she’s going to be the death of me. Moans escaped their lips as his ridged member slid inside her. “Rolan…take me, love…”

As you wish.

He was going much faster than he would have been if they were at home and not in a washroom at a ball, much to his dismay. Still though, I’ll make her feel wonderful. How could I not? With a few deep thrusts, he came just as she did. His hold on her remained firm as she was more than a little unsteady. “Shh, it’s okay. I’ve got you, sweetling. I’ve got you.”

Long, soft arms around his neck, his fiancée nodded wordlessly, still catching her breath.

I will always have you, dearest. Always.

“I do believe this is the longest time we’ve gone with you cleaning us after lovemaking, my handsome wizard.” Amelie teased.

Gods, I love seeing her like this---happy, carefree, full of joy.

He grimaced and then muttered the spell. “I barely call whatever that was lovemaking, sweetheart. It was barely a fuck.”

A wave of giggles erupted from her as she kissed all over his cheeks and mouth.

Perfectly content being in a washroom with her future husband.

Certainly better than going back to that bloody ball.

[theshotsheardacrossworlds]

Bosom

Sequel to Bat. Astarion and Agnetha test having him as a bat under her coat so he can go outside when she does chores. SFW.

“This is quite possibly the most comfortable I’ve ever been in my life, darling.” Astarion sighed happily while in bat form. In my beloved future wife’s bosom. She’s taking me outside. I’ll be in the sun…sort of. Safe inside her bust and covered by her coat. I can still see between the buttons and won’t burn. He laid his head against a breast. “The best pillows I’ve ever rested my pretty head on…and so warm.”

Shaking her head, she chuckled. “If I didn’t any know better, Astarion, I’d say you’re a breast man.”

He squeaked indignantly. “How dare you! I’m an Agi man!” The most beautiful person to ever exist. My darling girl. “Though I won’t deny your tits are perfect, sweetness.” Perfect to hold. Perfect to touch. Perfect to suckle from. Perfect to fuck. Perfect to stare at during boring as hell dinner parties at Wildheart Manor.

“You are too much! What am I going to do with you?” Her hand touched the doorknob but did not turn it. “Alright, I’m going to step out. You ready?”

“One small step for you, one large step for me!” Technically, I’ll be in the sun. Just not the way I ideally want but that’s alright.

Agnetha exited their home and locked the door. Glancing down, she tapped her chest, her fingers hitting his head. Ow. “You okay? Light’s hitting me, and I want to make sure—”

She worries too much. “I’m fine, darling! Hmm,” he peeked through the gap between buttons. “It’s looking lovely today.” His nose booped a breast. “But not nearly as much as you, my dear.” He could feel the heat rising in her and fuck me it feels good.

“Oh my gods, you’re too much, love!” She giggled, pulling out a list from her pocket. “Let’s see, first on my list is buying the dyes you want from Master Figaro and then groceries. Wait a second,” she furrowed her brow. “Why did you write in ‘appointment with Mrs. Greenleaf’?”

He rolled his eyes. “Because you obviously have an appointment with Mrs. Greenleaf for a manicure and pedicure, my sweet.”

“Obviously?!”

“Obviously.” He cleared his throat and was glad she could not see his face. Not that I’m crying. No. Definitely not. “Y-you’ve done so much these past few months. Oversaw our home being renovated and decorated. The shop. Managing the shop! Keeping me on time is worthy of so much praise on its own. And you deserve some pampering by a professional. You deserve it all.” I can never give you everything you truly deserve, but I damn well mean to try.

“Please,” she sniffled. “You make it sound like I did it all by myself with one hand tied behind my back. You were as much a part of all that, especially with the shop because it’s your bloody shop—”

“Ours.” As equals. Always.

“Our shop where you’re the one actually tailoring and designing and whatever the fuck else you do.” Agnetha giggled softly, entering Figaro’s. “Hello, Master Figaro…”

***

As much as he acknowledged that grocery shopping was necessary, Astarion hated grocery shopping. Tedious. Boring. Stupid. Why can’t we simply have someone else shop for Agi, bring it home, and put it away? Once that was mercifully done, Agnetha locked the door and made the short walk to Mrs. Greenleaf’s salon.

“Hey, you still alright in there?” She tapped her chest lightly. “Not too warm or cramped?”

She has got to be kidding.

“No, it’s awful. OF COURSE I’M ALRIGHT!” He squeak-screeched at her from under the fabric.

“Okay, okay! No need to yell, love.” She laughed so sweetly. “Silly little bat, I love you.”

I love you more than you will ever know, sweetness. “Love you too, darling. Now, be sure to tell Mrs. Greenleaf to use the Darkened Suite for your treatments.” Mainly used for drow and duegear---there’s no sunlight, only illumination from mushrooms and crystals.

She raised an eyebrow in realization. “Ah, so you can be out of my boobs and be able to move around. Good thinking, love.”

“The only thinking I do, my little butter bun!”

In her most earnest and totally charming way, Agnetha explained to Mrs. Greenleaf that she wanted the Darkened Suite and that she had a pet bat who was in her coat.

“What’s his name?” The older half-elf asked her.

Oh shit.

His fiancée blinked as she sat down for the manicure and placed Astarion next to her on the table. “His name is…” She glanced at him. “Étoile.” Étoile? That means “star” among a certain tribe of elves. My love, you are incredibly thoughtful. “He’s a sweetheart mostly,” she glanced at him with mischief in her brown eyes. “But a little bossy sometimes.”

“Bossy? Me? Perish the thought!” He turned up his nose. “Now, stop chatting with me and start talking to her.”

She scratched his head while rolling her eyes. The manicure was first. She chose a lovely dark green---to contrast with her pale skin and red hair.

Then came the pedicure. Mrs. Greenleaf went to get some more of her very special honey scrub (Halsin would eat it right up) and left the couple alone.

I think I’ve been a very good bat today and deserve more breast time. From a side table, he climbed onto her chest and rested his oh so weary head.

As she leaned down to kiss his head, she whispered, “What are you doing?”

“What does it look like? I need more titty time.” After all, I didn’t complain once while grocery shopping and normally I express my displeasure constantly.

Her eyes widened. “You can’t just say shit like that in public!” And there’s my kiss! “Alright, you can stay here, but stop saying ‘titty time’ because who knows if anyone’s using Speak to Animals today.” She chuckled a little. “You mad man. I love you.”

“I love you too, my sweet little cinnamon bun. Now, how are you feeling? More relaxed?”

She leaned her head against the cushioned headrest behind her and closed her eyes. “I am. It seems I needed it.” Agnetha began to rub circles onto his furry head. “Thanks love.”

Though he wanted to gloat, he found he could not, given just how bloody sincere she is. I simply cannot tease her when she’s like this. “You are so welcome, darling.” Hearing Mrs. Greenleaf return, he nudged her chest. “She’s coming.”

His fiancée nodded and kissed his head again. Something Mrs. Greenleaf definitely noticed. You wish you had Agi’s full attention on you, dear. It’s sad you’ll never know that level of love, care, and affection. Mine. All mine… Before he realized what was happening, he sank his fangs through the fabric of her dress, startling her. “SHIT!” He squeaked, flapping his wings a little.

“Is everything all right, my lady?”

“It’s okay. Shh, it’s okay.” Agnetha whispered, stroking his back. She looked up at Mrs. Greenleaf apologetically. “Sorry, he…erm, sometimes forgets he needs to behave when he’s out.”

Oh you naughty little thing! Two can play at this game, darling. “This is behaving. You’re lucky I’m not trying to burrow back between your tits.”

Trying (and very much failing) to keep a neutral expression, she closed her eyes as the half-elf began the second treatment.

The things I can say to her to make her crack…

***

Astarion returned to his elf form the second they returned home and began to laugh manically.

Agnetha shook her head, laughing. “I can’t believe all that filth you fucking said to me when I was getting my pedicure! You naughty, naughty man!”

“You must admit that it was hilarious! Each intake of breath, stiffening up like a board,” he mimicked her. “And I bet your face was like this!” He contorted his face into a wide-eyed look of terror. “Ha! You can’t even deny it, can you!”

She rolled her eyes. “You’re lucky I love you, Astarion.” She teased, deliberately shaking those irresistible hips at me as she walks. She knows what she’s doing. She acts like she doesn’t, but she does. My Agi is so delightfully obvious. “Because you can be—”

“A very naughty man, yes yes I’m aware.” He pulled her into a hug, his lithe arms around her waist and hands on her behind. “Now, be a darling and let me make you dinner, hmm?” She taught me to cook, and I guarantee she’s a much better teacher than…Gale. Squeezing her substantial and quite beautiful backside, his lips captured hers in a slow, languid kiss. As much as I enjoy being a bat, this is far better.

She smiled into her kisses; long arms wrapped around his neck. “Together?”

“Because you think I need supervision?” He teased, flashing his fangs.

Agnetha laughed into another kiss, bringing her hands to cup his cool cheeks. “Don’t sell yourself short, love---you haven’t burned a piece of toast in weeks.”

He playfully tapped her behind. “I can do so much more for you than not burn toast, sweetness. How about some of that salmon you bought? With a spiced honey glaze? And you can make a nice little side for yourself. Sound good?”

“Perfect, Star.” No. You are perfect. Perfect in every single way. She gave him one last quick kiss and then left his embrace. As she turned towards the ice box, she gave a thoughtful hum. “I think today’s test was a massive success.”

“Why, I do believe it was, darling.”

Whether in sun or shadow, so long as I have you then I am happy.

[theshotsheardacrossworlds]

Dream

Set post-game. Astarion plays a game with his beloved two days before their wedding. NSFW.

"I had a very nice dream that started like this." Astarion murmured, a smirk tugging on his lips. His soon-to-be wife was spooning him (our favorite sleeping and meditation position), her hand was roaming over his smooth chest---nails painted blue and her touch as always gentle.

“Did you?”

He could imagine her smirking behind him.

Oh, I have an idea. “Want to play a little game, darling?” he asked lazily.

She raised an eyebrow. “What kind of game?”

“I want to see if the dream will become reality. See if you do now as you did in that lovely dream. And do you know what the best part is, my dear?” The elf did not wait for her to answer, grinning so widely that his fangs were showing. “No matter what I win! Well, and you too, of course.”

She’s rolling her eyes. I know it.

“Nice save there, Astarion.” She managed to get out as she laughed. “But I’ll play along…are you going to hint whether I’m doing the right thing?” Her freckled hand drifted lower, and he could tell her lips were a hair’s breadth away from his ear. “Please, love?”

As always, dearest, you never fail to make reality better than any dream. “How can I say no when you ask so nicely? So polite and sweet, my tastiest treat is…ah!” he gasped as she reached the base of his cock. “Yes, that’s it! Such a good girl…don’t stop…”

She tugged gently on his earlobe. I nearly spilled right then and there. “Hmmm, I’ll take that to mean I’m on the right track.” Slowly stroking him, she lifted a leg slightly to go over his. “And this?”

“Ah-amazing, my sweet. Perfect. Keep going. Please.” Don’t stop. Never stop. Want to feel like this forever… With every passing second, he was more aware of her soft body against his---her heaving breasts against his back, the leg that was hooked over his thigh, her beautiful, perfect hand on his cock, and the warmth. Gods, the warmth. She’s so warm and soft and so sweet and so painfully gentle with me always.

“Now the real question is,” she bit on her lip playfully. “Do you want to finish inside me or not? Because I know you love it. Do you want to, love?” Agentha whispered, gripping his cock a little harder.

Astarion grinned. Just like the dream, except what comes next. “Oh yes, please! Though, I don’t necessarily need to.” Halsin confirmed what we hoped and prayed was true…a child, who should arrive in several months’ time. The most delightful surprise that I will be revealing at our wedding reception in two days. “You’re already so filled up, darling. Can you take more of my seed?”

She laughed softly. “You know I can, my beautiful love. You’d fill me with everything you have, and it won’t be enough…”

He growled, wiggling out of her hold and turning on his other side to kiss her as deeply and passionately as he could. I love her. I love her. I love her. I love her. “On your back, my pretty butter bun. Time to fill you again…” His eyes never left hers as she lay flat on her back. He then smiled as she reached for his face. “And again…” He kissed her once more. “And again…” Twice. “And again…”

“Are we talking about tonight or how many children you’d like us to have?” Agentha teased, her hands drifting upwards towards his ears. Oh you naughty girl… “Because that’s four I think?”

He barked a laugh as he kissed her jaw. “Four to start. At the very least. Then we can go from there. I personally wouldn’t be opposed to ten—”

“Four to ten is a hell of a leap, Mr. Ancunin.” She grinned. Agnetha’s freckled fingers traced the shells of his ears. “How does one make it, I wonder?”

“It’s so utterly adorable when you tease me, sweetness. You’re a smart girl, darling. I think you know how one gets from four to ten…” His lips captured hers in a heated kiss. “You simply add six.”

“Oh yes! Simply add six to four, and you get ten. How silly of me.” She snarked, her perfect nose wrinkling in amusement. “And I’m assuming you’d like ten—”

“Well, even that’s a lower estimate, dear—”

That was the most adorable squeak I’ve ever heard! Agi is simply the cutest. And there she goes trying to look indignant, but I know better, darling. I see that grin you’re trying to hide. “Astarion, you naughty man!” Her soft arms enveloped him as his lips touched hers again. I could kiss you for a thousand lifetimes, and it wouldn’t be enough. “Naughty…naughty…man…”

“Do you know what I love imagining, my love?” He slipped inside her, causing them both to moan. “You’re just so, so beautiful---belly swollen with our child, your breasts just utterly massive!!!” He giggled manically at that. “Can’t forget those hips of yours, sweetness. Good enough to eat…” Astarion rolled his narrow hips slowly, savoring every movement and moan. “Isn’t that lovely, darling?” I know the answer, but I want to hear it.

Going for his ears again, she moaned into his mouth. “Yes. Yes, it’s lovely. It’s what I want…want with you…as many as we want, I promise…”

“Good girl. Promise, ah, to let me take care of you? See to all your needs?” Say it. Please. Please, sweetness. His thrusts grew more erratic as he lifted one of her long legs on his shoulder. “Agi darling…”

The change in angle had her seeing stars, her brown eyes blown wide with lust. “I-I promise. Love you…trust you…do whatever you want, Star…”

That never failed to send him over the edge. As she gets off on me calling her a good girl, when she tells me that I can’t help myself. She’s such a sweet little thing. He buried his face in her neck and willed himself not to bite down. NO. No feeding from her. Not until the child is born. Feeling a hand touching his curls, he smiled. “You know, when you are bigger, darling, we’ll need to be creative with positions.” Astarion sat up and admired his fiancée.

“And let me guess,” she stretched her back a little, a large smile on her face. “We’ll need to test each one?”

He booped her freckled nose and looked fondly at her. “My brilliant, beautiful girl---of course we shall.”

She caught one of his hands and brought it to her lips. “I love you,” she wrinkled her nose again and giggled. “You utter madman. Why do I think we’re going to end up with a dozen little dhampirs?”

Oh.

His eyes widened. The corners of his mouth slowly rose, forming a feral grin.

“Oh dear, I know that look.” Letting go of his hand, she maneuvered him off her and sat up, swinging her legs onto the floor. “Is that the number we’re aiming for now, love?” She laughed as she stood. She walked into their master bathroom (designed by yours truly) and closed the door, leaving Astarion still grinning madly.

Oh yes.

As always, when it comes to you, sweetness, reality is always better than any dream.

Especially when it’s a dozen little dhampirs.

[theshotsheardacrossworlds]

Bat

Once again got inspired by art. #NotSorry. Set post-game. Agnetha sees a white bat flying around...and wonders why it's squeaking at her. SFW.

Agnetha Wildheart screamed when she saw the white bat flying extremely badly in her and Astarion’s suite at Wildheart Manor. While their new home was being repaired (it’s a larger house overlooking Gray Harbor that sustained some damage when we fought the Netherbrain---it was Astarion’s favorite that we saw) and his tailor shop being built (on the site of my and Nadia’s house that was destroyed during the final battle), they were staying at Wildheart Manor. In my old suite that I had growing up and before I moved in with Nadia. It’s nice to be home, but I can’t wait to be in our home.

“AHHHHHHHHHHHHH FUCKING HELLS! IT’S A BAT!”

The bat squeaked insistently.

Wait, is it…trying to look me in the eye? And it keeps trying to land on my tits?

She held out her hands in front of her ample chest, and the bat collapsed in a very cute heap.

“SQUEAK! Squeak!!!!”

Uhhhhh…okay. She shook her head. “Sorry, little one. I don’t think I have a Potion of Animal Speaking on me—oh hold on, yes I do!” Walking to her alchemy table, she placed the bat down and found the potion she was looking for. “One moment, sweetie.” She drank the potion and immediately heard a familiar voice.

“DARLING!!! My love! Look! Look what I did!!!” The bat that was indeed Astarion squeaked happily. “I can change shape!”

Agnetha blinked several times at her fiancée. He’s a fucking bat. He’s literally a bat. On my table. He’s a bat on my table. “So, how did you change shape?” What sort of magic bullshit did he get himself into this time?

Astarion flapped his wings. Like he’s excited. Aww, he’s so cute. I should pick him up again. “Oh sweetness, please do carry me around, right against your chest. It’s s-so wonderful, darling.” That was the cutest fucking squeak-yawn I’ve ever heard. “But to answer your question…I’m not sure. I was reading about spawns who managed to break free from their masters---not many of those---and it seems some developed some abilities that a full-blooded vampire has.” He nuzzled his head on the top of her cleavage. “And I thought, ‘What if I changed into a bat?’ And then IT HAPPENED!”

She giggled, supporting his soooooo tiny body with one arm and rubbing circles on her head with her other hand. “You sure you’re not a latent sorcerer, love?”

“No, I most certainly am not! Ooh darling, that feels amazing. Don’t stop. Please.” She changed from his head to taking a small brush (an extra toothbrush from the Elfsong) on his back, and he was like putty in her hand. “Lower, dear. Lower.” He moaned softly. Oh gods, what if—

She began to brush lightly on his behind, earning her an ungodly moan-squeak from Astarion. “You like that?” Awwww his little bum is wiggling! He’s so fucking cute right now that I can’t bloody stand it.

Astarion bit back another moan and cleared his throat. “I’m declaring at least an hour per day to bat time and having this very special treatment. We simply must do this every day.”

She chuckled softly, now focusing on the other side of his cute little bum! Awww! “I think that can be arranged. You’re feeling alright though, love? No lingering effects?” When I’ve accidentally polymorphed in the past, I always felt nauseous.

“No, darling. I’m fine. Don’t worry. You worry too much as it is!” Of course I do! I’m taking a very active role in running the shop and setting things up, overseeing repairs on our home, and trying to find a way for you to walk in the sun again!!! It’s a lot! He nuzzled her softness. “Gods, you’re so warm, my love…”

Putting the brush down, she kissed the top of his very little head. “Do you want me to lie down and pull on a blanket? You’ll be nice and toasty that way, Star.”

He nodded. “Yes…yes please, my little butter bun…”

When I asked him why ‘my little butter bun’ he said it’s because I’m hot, soft, and delicious. He may have been drunk off bear again. Kicking off her shoes, she pulled the covers off and got into their bed with Astarion faceplanted in her plush chest. As she pulled them back up, he was as relaxed as she had ever seen him. “You okay?”

“Perfect, my sweet…you’re so, so warm…and soft…” He sighed into her chest as she rubbed his head with a finger. “And delicious!” He playfully brushed a fang against the top of her breast, and she lightly bonked his head with a grin.

“Excuse you! Dinner is later, love. If you want a little snack now, you can have some from my finger.” Oh my gods, that’ll be so cute. “Naughty little bat.” My naughty little bat. Mine for as long as he wishes.

He let out a contented squeak. “In a little while, sweetness. Want to savor this…”

Agnetha was not sure when she fell asleep but woke a few hours later with her naughty little bat snoring and purring exactly where she left him.

[theshotsheardacrossworlds]

By Your Side

Okay so this was *supposed* to be a funny "Agi gets high and is silly with Astarion" fic but it turned out a little bit more serious with added Whatever the Fuck Sorcery Agi does lol. Mostly SFW.

“How are you doing, darling?” Astarion cooed at his well, we’re not lovers in the traditional sense perhaps…companion? Yes, my companion! He looked at Agnetha with such fondness that if he saw it in anyone else, he’d scoff. But not with her and I. No, I am that fond of her. I love her so dearly.

After taking up Halsin on his offer to give her herbs to help her relax (my poor sweet deals with so much) and smoking them, she was currently staring at Astarion, her brown eyes wide but definitely glazed over. “I am fine and dandy, love. Everything is so nice, you know?”

“It is, sweetness, especially with you.” One of his pale hands tapped her thighs, and he smiled. She’s so soft and warm. Perfect. I always need to touch her…

“Ughhhhhhhh, you silly bitch, you don’t have to use your lines on me anymore. You got me!”

Did she just…?!? He laughed, squeezing her softness. “I’m a what, darling?”

She snorted. “Silly bitch. Because you are. But it’s okay obviously!!!” Good gods, she’s giving those puppy dog eyes. “Because I love you.” He opened his mouth to speak, but she placed a finger on his lips. “I know you won’t say it to me. I know. It’s okay. I know you will someday.”

“I…” He struggled to find the words, any word, to express both the relief of her reassurance and sadness. She deserves someone better than me. Someone who will tell her every moment of every day for the rest of her life that she is loved. Someone who will make love to her whenever she wishes. For as long as she desires. Someone who isn’t me. “You know I do, right? You know how I feel?” Wait, she’s high as fuck and I’m asking her about knowing how much I love her? Idiot.

Agnetha nodded, smiling happily. “’Course I do. You say it all the time without actually saying it.” She thought for a moment and then grinned. “Like when you always watch my ass in fights.” I won’t lie I do in fact do that, but I believe she meant watching her back. “You make sure I’m okay. You never let anything near me.” Not if I can help it, no. I will slaughter anyone who tries to hurt you. “You’re always trying to touch me in some way. Don’t think I don’t notice!” She just tapped her finger on her nose. Now she’s giggling like a mad woman. Agnetha undid her ponytail and twirled a few of her long, red curls between her fingers. “You brush my hair every day. You love to bathe with me. You patch up my clothes and even…you know…” Let them out as much as I’m able. We never find anything that truly fits her, poor dear. If we manage to kill Cazador, I’ll make her whatever she wants. Everything she wants. “Help me with them…I know you love me. It’s in everything you do for me. Though,” her gaze returned to his. “There is something I need to know, okay? Just one thing.”

“A-alright. What is it?” Every muscle in his body tensed, afraid of what she was going to ask.

“Will you be there when I’m old? I could understand if that’s not what you want—oh!”

Always. He hugged so hard and so quickly that she toppled backwards, her head hitting a pillow. “I will be by your side for as long as you’ll have me. I promise.” Resting his head on her ample chest, he felt her rubbing his hair.

She let out an adorable little gasp. “Forever then, Star?”

Always. “If that’s what you want, darling, then yes. Forever it is.” It won’t be forever though. She’s a human---her life will end in the blink of an eye. She’ll be gone, and I’ll be alone…alone…all alone… Blinking back tears, he nearly began to sob when she began to rub his back.

“It’s okay. I’ll think of something. I will. Just you wait and see, love…” She whispered softly, rocking them both gently. “It’s okay. I’ll do some magic shit and make it alright.”

He shook his head, a small laugh escaping him. Oh my darling girl, not everything can be solved with you thinking very hard and making magic happen. Though if anyone can, it’s you. “Will you now?”

“Yep.”

Well, that’s definitive.

***

Ten years after their marriage, Astarion was astounded to learn that his wife did indeed “do some magic shit” to make eternity less painful for him. With spells she composed herself (using that beautiful tempest swirling inside her and…feelings, I suppose), she managed to accomplish three things: 1) that her body would remain the same with every reincarnation; 2) that she and Astarion were soul bound to each other; and 3) that they would find each other after her twenty-first nameday. “Because of the binding, we’ll be drawn to each other, seek the other out.” She took one of his hands in hers, her brown eyes full of joy. “You won’t wait too long, love.”

He leaned to her, a hand cupping her cheek. As his lips touched hers (perfect every time), he smiled. “And how will you know that I’m your husband?”

Agnetha chuckled softly. “Just trust me that I’ll know. It’s all up here,” she tapped her head. “And here.” She then tapped her chest over her heart. “After all, I haven’t failed you yet, my naughty little bat.”

Astarion kissed her again, this time with a little more passion, hands sneaking around her much thicker and more delicious waist. “The most popular tailor shop in Baldur’s Gate and seven children. I’d say you haven’t failed me yet, no.” He teased. His fangs scraped lightly over her lips, which never fails to turn her on. “Not that you could anyways, dear.”

She wrinkled her nose and giggled. “Flatterer.” The human placed an affectionate kiss on his nose and cupped his face. “Now we’ll be together forever. Just not in the way that either of us imagined.”

He knew what she meant. The ritual. I had it all planned, you see. I’d complete the ritual, become the Vampire Ascendant, and convince Agi to let me make her into a vampire spawn. There---problem solved. What a fool I was! I would not trade our lives together and the lives we created for anything. “But it is so delightfully us, isn’t it? Full of love and adoration and only slightly mad.”

“Only slightly.” She teased, pressing several kisses to his lips. Gods, I cannot get enough of her. Not now. Not ever. “My mad husband who wants a dozen little dhampirs…”

Two at play at this game, madam. He clicked his tongue as one of the hands on her waist squeezed. “My equally mad wife who wants a dozen little dhampirs and lets me spoil her rotten—”

“Daddy? Mummy?”

Someone didn’t lock the door, Agi.

With one last peck, Agnetha looked at the toddler in their doorway. Pale ginger curls framed the boy’s round face, and ruby eyes glanced between his parents. “What’s the matter, my little love?” She beckoned him over, and he scurried to his mother and soon settled in her arms. “Did you have a bad dream?”

He nodded. “Scary…”

“My poor little Sylven! You can stay with us tonight, darling.” Astarion cooed as he ruffled his son’s hair. The toddler snuggled against his mother, a sight that before his capture by the mindflayers would have disgusted him. But not anymore. Not when I have them. Emilia, Ariane, Sophie, Nessa, Helene, Thora, and Sylven.

And my darling girl.

Before long, the small boy fell asleep cuddled against his mother while his adoring father rubbed circles into his back. “Did I tell what happened earlier?”

He rolled his eyes. “Sweetness, that could be anything.”

She stuck her tongue out. “Fine. Anyways, I asked Sylven when he was playing with the blocks what he wanted to be when he grew up.”

“The suspense is killing me, dear.” Astarion deadpanned, kissing Sylven’s curls.

The look in her eyes turned dreamy. “Daddy. He said Daddy. He wants to be you, love. That was the sweetest damn thing.” She turned her head to face him. “And you thought he wouldn’t love you.” His wife teased, capturing his lips in a gentle kiss.

The second we saw that he was a boy I panicked. With the girls it’s so easy for me. I make them the prettiest outfits in Baldur’s Gate, make matching ones for their favorite dolls…have so many tea parties where we gossip like spinster aunts. But a boy. The girls are learning archery so he can too, I suppose. What was I to do with him? I was terrified. And as always, my infinitely wiser wife was correct: “Just go with the flow and listen to him.” Going with the flow has turned out to be excellent advice because he is glued to me, especially when we’re in the shop. He wants to watch me work and pretend he’s sewing too. My little boy wants to be…me. Me. Swallowing the lump in his throat, he nodded before giving her another kiss. “Happy to be proven wrong, darling.”

“I see! Well, I’ll note that for future reference.” She noted rather too smugly. Has she been learning this from me? Because I’m so flattered, dearest. For the next several minutes, they settled in a comfortable if exceedingly sleepy silence. Agnetha’s breathing became slower and deeper, and her eyes fluttered open and closed.

“Silly goose. Go to sleep.” Astarion chided his wife gently, now laying on his side. Rest. You need rest. Between the children, the shop, and ensuring I’m fed every day, you need to rest, darling. “Don’t stay awake for me. I’ll trance in a while.”

A small smile tugged on her pretty lips. “Forever…it isn’t what either of us thought but…we’ll be together…forever…” Eyes full of sleep, she held Sylven closer to her. “Love you, my shining star…”

“As I love you, my darling girl. Have the sweetest dreams for us…”

Always.

Forever.

[theshotsheardacrossworlds]

Agnetha: I care about you.

Astarion: Really?

Agnetha: *tries very hard not to squeeze the stuffing out of him*

[theshotsheardacrossworlds]

WIP Wednesday

In which dear Agnetha has a solution to her overactive gag reflex and Astarion is amused. NSFW.

Astarion watched as his dearest and sweetest companion was getting yet another lecture from that windbag Gale. Why on earth would she subject herself to that? His ruby eyes narrowed when Gale put his hands on Agnetha’s shoulders and smiled at her. Why are you touching her? Don’t you dare linger, wizard. I have my eyes on you. Oh good, she’s coming over here. Act natural. He turned a page in the book he was pretending to be reading and then caught her gaze as she walked into their room at the Elfsong Inn. “Hello, beautiful.”

She smiled warmly and closed the door behind her, but Astarion noticed her brown eyes were full of excitement. O ho, does she have something planned? “Hello, love. I’ve got a proposition for you, if you’re interested.”

He took one of her fair, freckled hands and brought it to his lips while keeping eye contact. That’s it, my pretty girl. Blush for me. You become even lovelier when you’re like this. “Princess, I’m always interested in your propositions. Do tell.”

“Well, you know how I’ve got a very sensitive gag reflex and that’s why I won’t…you know…” She blushed more, her arms crossing over her delicious supple tits. “Go down on you?” She sounds so nervous, poor thing. Time to turn up the charm for my darling girl.

“My sweet, I told you it’s fine. It’s nothing to be ashamed of.” I would never force you to do anything you don’t want. Never. Never ever. He flashed her a reassuring grin.

“Yes, love…but that’s why I’ve been talking to Gale—”

“About blowjobs?! Really?!”

Her eyes widened and a look of horror appeared on her face. “NO! No! No! No! I-I was asking him about creating a mirror image.” Oh. OH. “I’ve never done it, so I asked the most knowledgeable person on the subject (please don’t tell him I said that---his head is big enough as it is) and now I can make one.” She wrinkled her nose and giggled. “One that can suck your cock if you want.”

[theshotsheardacrossworlds]

Shot

Agnetha learns that one of Astarion's love languages is landing sick ass crits to impress her. Mostly SFW with some flirting.

Agnetha watched Astarion aim his bow. Gods, his focus is incredible. She watched the small smirk tug on his lips as he released the arrow.

The Ettercap was dead.

Holy fuck.

That shot was…perfect!

And hot. Very, very hot.

He did the same thing the next day---taking out a sleeping bugbear in one shot, the same smirk on his face.

Godsdamnit, why is he so hot?! Flashing the most shit-eating grin I’ve ever seen. Just…get over it. He’ll never be interested in you, Agi.

How wrong she was.

It was not simply him being an excellent shot.

No, it was one of the many ways he flirted with her.

Now he winks at her before landing a critical shot.

Now he flashes her his best cocky grin after the shot lands.

Now he taps her ass when he maneuvers by her, still smirking.

Now he will use their connection to tease her.

Did you see that, darling? All for you, my sweet treat.

You mad man. I love you so much.

As I love and adore you. GET FUCKED, SHAPESHIFTER!

Yeah, I was going to say let’s maybe pay attention to the battle and less flirting? But yes to flirting later! Definitely! Flirting with my tits out?

AGI.

“DETONO!” She shouted. The resulting Thunderwave made the Bhaalist near her go flying and hit the ground with a thud. Agnetha faced him, winking and doing a little shimmy because fuck it. Why not?

Hot.

All for you, love.

Gods, aren’t you so sweet! I’ll get kill something else for you, my dear. Just wait and see…

With his next shot, he landed another critical hit.

THAT SMIRK!!!! Oh goodness, Astarion. The things you do to me…

[theshotsheardacrossworlds]

Body

Agi knows it's wrong, but she can't help but think there's another reason why Astarion doesn't want to have sex.

She knew she was being silly.

She knew it.

The celibacy she and Astarion now shared, while going extremely well, left her with a terrible, lingering thought---by him admitting that he had bedded not the most beautiful people sometimes and it disgusted him that it applied to her as well. Love the heart and soul…just not the rest. Which I know…I know…deep down isn’t true. But this isn’t about me or my stupid, silly, awful issues, it’s about him. His healing. His comfort. Anything. Everything. For him.

Agnetha was taken out of her thoughts by the man himself, his lithe silhouette against the flaps of her tent.

“Oh! Hi, I, erm…wasn’t expecting you.” Fuck my life. Why did you say that?!

He immediately tensed. “I’ve been coming every evening since we chatted. Is this not what you want? I can go—”

Get it together, Agi. “No! No! Oh my gods, no. I…” She trailed off as he entered the tent, his expression puzzled with a healthy dose of worry. “Thinking too much.”

“About what? I swear, if Shadowheart and Lae’zel disturb you one more time with their inane prattle, I’ll drain them dry.” Ah yes, there’s the attractive yet completely murderous look in his eyes. Just tell him. He won’t be mad, right? His fists were clenched at his narrow hips.

She raised her hands. “No, it’s not that. It’s definitely not that. It’s honestly really stupid.” And I’m being stupid.

He raised an eyebrow in disbelief, his hands now on his hips. “If it’s truly that stupid, darling, then why not tell me?” He moved to her bedroll and sat down, patting the spot next to him. His look was sincere, the smile now gracing his features genuine.

Trust him as he trusts me. Closing her eyes for a second, she took a deep breath and sat next to him, her long legs stretched out in front of her. “It’s because it’s about you. Well, us.”

“I-I see.” Ever so slightly, he leaned away from her, preparing for what he thought was the inevitable---that she wanted something he could not give at the moment and frankly, did not know if he could give it again.

“When you said you were disgusted by your targets,” she explained quietly, not bearing to even look at him. I’ll cry if I do. Oh fuck it, I already am. “and as you said, I was one of your targets in a way, so you…think I’m disgusting.” As he opened his mouth to protest, she reached for his hand. “No. Let me finish. And that’s why you asked for us to not have sex, which I know isn’t true. I know.” More tears fell down her pale, freckled cheeks. “I know.”

“If it’s not true, then why are you thinking it? Of course, that’s not why! You silly, silly goose! Come here, darling.” The tone at first was harsh but softened considerably after he noticed her lower lip quivering. Wrapping an arm around her thick waist, his other hand found hers. “Why on earth would you think something like that, sweetness?”

“Because I’m tall—”

“Statuesque!”

“Broad-shouldered—”

“Perfect—”

“You can guess what the last one is—”

Astarion grinned, pressing a kiss to her cheek. The hand on her waist squeezed the softness under her top. “Voluptuous. Curvaceous. Thoroughly, deliciously plump. I could go on, darling.”

“I’ve been told to my face, on several occasions, that Mum can’t offer a dowry large enough to make a man marry me.” Far too many times. From suitors. From their families. From other noble houses of all races. “I’ve also been told that it’s too bad I’m fat because I have a nice face.” Gods help anyone who says that in earshot of Mum…or Astarion, because he looks like he’s about to commit several murders. “Love, please.”

“This further proves that I have excellent taste.” He sneered.

She could not help but smile at that. “Of course.”

He brought her hand to his lips, his ruby eyes meeting hers. “You are stunning, my love, and remember, if anyone ever says that to you again,” And there’s the look again! “I will simply devour them.”

Her brown eyes widened. “Or, you know, we could just not do that.” She shifted and pulled him into a hug. “I love you so much, but please no murder.” Because it’s bad obviously, but I imagine there’s a ton of paperwork as well. There always is.

He laughed. “Fine, fine! No murder for now.”

She laughed despite herself. “You are too much.” They shared a kiss before laying down on her bedroll (I miss my bed so fucking much) with Astarion insisting on spooning her. “You’re sure, love? I know you like it when I’m the big spoon.” She whispered, feeling him rest his chin on her shoulder while he sneaked a hand under her top. Ever since that night, he’s been a lot more affectionate in private, which has been a lovely surprise.

Astarion hummed in approval as he placed several kisses on her neck. The exact spot where he normally feeds. “My sweet, if I wasn’t sure, I wouldn’t be doing it. Now, let me make this crystal clear so we have no more misunderstandings---I have not nor will I ever lie to you about how beautiful you are. Every inch is perfection.” He gently caressed her belly, sighing into her shoulder. “When you hug me, I feel safe and warm and loved. I adore resting my head on your chest. I love touching you. Surely, you must know?” There was a pause. “Oh wait, you don’t notice anything.” He chuckled as he pressed a kiss where he feeds. “My sweet little—”

“I am not little.” Agnetha snorted. “Not in any way. Not even when I was a child!”

“No wonder your birth mother died, darling. No one survives birthing an over six-foot-tall woman.” Astarion snarked, earning him a loud groan and eyeroll from his lover. “Tell me I’m wrong!”

“Ass. You’re not wrong if it ever happened, which it didn’t and will never.” She gave it to him right back, wiggling in his grip.

He tightened his hold on her, grinning. “So, what you’re saying is…I’m right.”

Asshole. “Yes, you’re bloody right, you naughty man.”

They lay in a comfortable silence for some time. As she began to drift to sleep, she expected him to leave.

He’s not leaving. He’s staying for the first time.

“You can go back to your tent if you want, love.”

“What I want,” his voice was barely above a whisper. “Is to stay right here. With you.” She nodded a little, sleep now claiming her. “Have the sweetest dreams for us, my darling girl. I’ll be here when you wake. I’ll always be here, I promise.”

She smiled a little as she said sleepily, “Love you.” Even if he’s not ready to say it back, I’ll always tell him. Always.

[theshotsheardacrossworlds]

Date

This fic was inspired by a post from @vampiricgf about taking Astarion on a date post-game. I hope you all enjoy it, because it was a joy to write. <3

“Hey handsome,” Agnetha greeted Astarion, who was draping fabric for a dress he was making. For her. After all, poor dear lost nearly her entire wardrobe when her house was turned into rubble. “I have something I’d like to ask you.”

Oooooooh. He waggled his eyebrows, earning him a laugh. “Ask away! I’m all pointy ears, my love!”

She moved to hug him from behind, her long arms wrapping around his shoulders. She kissed his cheek before whispering conspiratorially, “Would you like to go on a date with me? A proper date?” She kissed his cheek again. “Please?”

A date.

A proper date.

A proper date with my darling girl.

He spun around quickly and kissed her soundly. When he tugged on her bottom lip, he squealed. “Oohoho yes! When? What time? Obviously at night I’m guessing…oh, and where? We must dress impeccably no matter what—”

“Astarion, you mad man!” She wrinkled her nose and giggled. It’s the cutest thing she does, and frankly, there’s a lot she does that is very cute. “All I’ll say is that it’s a place we’re familiar with, yes at night obviously, and tomorrow after sunset.” She booped his nose and turned, walking towards their suite door. “Now, I need to take Horace for a walk. See you soon, love.”

He stood at the mannequin dumbfounded.

A proper date with my darling girl tomorrow.

WHAT AM I GOING TO WEAR?!?!? WHAT IS SHE GOING TO WEAR?!?!?

***

Astarion agonized over what he and Agnetha should wear.

The agony!

And after watching him for hours lay out outfits and then put them back with the shake of his head and a tutting sound, she explained that their date would be on the rooftop of the Elfsong Tavern. “We have it to ourselves all night.” She rubbed her temples. “So please stop worrying about what to wear.”

The ecstasy!

Now that I know…I’VE GOT IT!

He thought that choosing their ensembles would help him relax.

He thought wrong.

I wonder what Agi has planned. If we have the entire rooftop to ourselves, then we could watch the stars. Cuddle. Have snacks, with her being the snack. Music? Tons of pillows? More cuddling?

Throughout the next day, he was giddy with excitement and to his embarrassment, could not stop giggling.

By the time they arrived at the Elfsong Tavern, Astarion was giggling louder than usual. He held her arm as she led them inside and towards the stairs. “Oh my gods, you are too much!” She chuckled softly then her mood shifted. “I hope I don’t let you down…”

“Ahahahaha, let me down?! Agi darling, you can’t be serious!” He let go of her arm and bolted up the stairs to the landing, hands on his hips. “You freed me from Cazador and two hundred years of torment, saved Baldur’s Gate from the Netherbrain, and you’re afraid of disappointing me? Ahahahahahaha!” He watched her fondly as she ascended the rest of the steps. For her, he chose the first dress he made her---long and form-hugging with a plunging neckline and gold accents. Green is one of her best colors, and she was the one who insisted on the lower neckline much to my delight.

She rolled her eyes playfully. “Considering how you’ve been vibrating like Horace when he knows I’m going to give him a treat, yes of course I’m going to worry about disappointing you.” When she reached the top of the stairs, she hugged him. “You’re one of the most important people in my life, Astarion. I want you to be happy. I want what I do for you to be perfect.”

“You worry too much, dear.” Far too much. She has a tincture made from those “relaxing herbs” Halsin gave her during our adventure to help settle her nerves every night. I tell her she’s doing too much, taking on too much responsibility…but she just smiles. Tells me she’s happy to have a hand in making any dream of mine come true. Tells me she’s not only content but the happiest she’s ever been. “Everything you do is perfect.”

She giggled. “I’ll keep that in mind next time I fuck up something.” Glancing at the ladder to the rooftop, she shook her head dramatically. “That just won’t do.” She pulled out a scroll of Fly and cast it on him as she snapped her fingers open the hatch above ALL WHILE FLYING THROUGH USING HER STORM SORCERY!!! Have I said that my darling girl is brilliant and far more talented than Gale?

Laughing even more, Astarion flew up the ladder and through the hatch, landing directly in from of his lover. Laughing, he pulled her face to his as her arms went around his narrow waist. “You are full of surprises, darling.”

“With a few more up my sleeve.” She winked as she kissed him again. Her kisses never fail to brighten my mood and lighten my undead heart. Sweet darling girl, what do you have planned? “This way, love.” She left his embrace, but her hands held his and led him to a pair of chaise lounges pushed together surrounded by floating candles. Is that..? “Snacks and drinks for me and beef blood from our favorite butcher for you. If you want the candle to be dimmer, just tell me and I’ll fix it.”

He watched her lovingly as she let go of his hands and flopped onto one of the lounges, taking a chocolate truffle. “You really thought of everything, didn’t you?” He murmured, pouring himself a glass of blood. “You did all this for me.” And I can’t quite believe it. “You didn’t have to, sweetness.”

She giggled a little as she chewed the truffles and grabbed another one. “Of course I did! Because I love you, Star. I love you, and I want to give you everything I can. Can’t walk in the sun? No problem!” She wrinkled her nose and smirked at him. Fucking hells. My darling girl is tempting me already. I’ll give it you right back, dear. “I’ll just do something very romantic at night with lots of cuddling. Problem solved.”

“I love it when you’re so confident, darling. It’s so very…alluring.” He put down the glass and lay down next to her, curling into her substantial side. “The most powerful sorceress on Toril, and she finally fucking acts like it.” One of his hands caressed her belly as he leaned close to her neck. “A rare and beautiful fruit that one must savor.” Not yet. Maybe later if she offers, but not now. “You wanted to show off, didn’t you, my pretty little butter bun?” he smirked, placing several kisses where he normally fed from her. “My darling giving it her all like the good girl she is. How…very…sweet.” He punctuated each word with a kiss, the hand on her belly slowly traveling upward.

She fidgeted slightly and sat up.

Shit. Shit. Shit.

“Before we go any further, there’s something I’d like to discuss with you, if that’s alright.”

She’s smiling. Not too wide. Her genuine smile. Maybe it’s nothing bad. I hope it’s nothing. Please don’t let it be something bad. I thought she was happy? Aren’t we happy? I’m happy, but is she happy? I thought so… “Yes, darling, of course.”

“I love you,” she began, brushing away a few of his white curls. “I know I say it all the time, but I mean it…well, every time.” She smiled at him, her brown eyes shining with a level of love, adoration, and devotion that Astarion knew all too well. Because that is always how she looks at me. As if I’m worthy of all that and more. “I love you. You mean everything to me. You’re my home. And I’m saying all this, because—”

Wait…is she…?!?!?!

“I want to know if you—”

IS SHE…?!?!

“Would like to…” She so fucking adorably bit on her lower lip. “Marry me?”

She did.

Astarion stared at Agnetha, mouth dropping open and eyes wide. His lips moved but nothing emerged for several seconds. “Marry you?” He practically squeaked in reply.

The smile on her face faded. “Yes, Star. I’m asking you if you want to marry me. If you would marry me. But only if that’s what you want, and I can understand if you don’t—”

We are not playing that little game tonight, my dear.

He yanked her face towards his roughly, silencing her with a passionate kiss. He maneuvered himself onto his back and encouraged her to lay on top of him. Oh gods, the first time I told her to do that, she started crying. “I’ll crush you, Astarion! I’ll break you!” Frankly, my dear---I don’t give a damn. I’m dead. It’s fine. Now though, she does it happily. That’s it, my good girl. “You seriously think I’d say no to having a party in my…ahem, our honor, then darling, you’re mad.” Astarion snarked, wrapping his arms around her and sighing contentedly. “The answer, of course, is yes.” As if it could be any other answer. I won’t lie---I was planning on proposing to her, but she beat me to it, the cheeky little thing. “If the question,” he whispered softly, hugging her a little tighter. “Is whether I want to be somewhere or do anything with you, the answer is always yes. I will be by your side always, and I want the world to know that.” He chuckled. “Or at the very least, our dear friends and your family.”

Agnetha laughed softly and reached for a small jewelry box. “Before we start talking about color schemes and flowers,” a white gold ring with rubies encircling the band was inside the box. She slipped it on his left ring finger, which he curiously did not have a ring on already. How funny! And how utterly perfect. “Oh thank fuck, it fits. I was worried.”

“Of course you were. Now,” he gave her a small, quick kiss. “Have something to eat and drink, darling, and get comfortable because we are going to talk about colors, flowers, decorations, dates, guest list, seating, and don’t worry, sweetness---our outfits are a top priority!” Her wedding dress will be talked about in Baldur’s Gate for generations. I will ensure that.

Adorably she pretended to be horrified as she poured herself some water and drank. “Oh my gods, what have I done?” She began to laugh and shake her head. “What monster have I unleashed this night?” Still laughing (and I am too because she’s simply too cute and funny), Agnetha took a few more chocolates and a chocolate chip cookie. She baked cookies earlier in the week for a friend she said. Hmmm, must have had several left over. “Sorry love, I couldn’t help it!”

Both now on their backs, Astarion faced her and scoffed. “Oh hush you! With how much teasing I give you on a daily basis, it’s only right and proper that you get your own back on me. Besides, I will only be demanding the best for our wedding, you know. We deserve the best. And speaking of the best, depending on how quickly we want to this planned and done, a certain kind of lily will be in season—”

“Wouldn’t it be so funny if Gale was your best man?” She sniggered, taking a bite out of the cookie. “He’d have the longest fucking speech ever, and somehow we’ll all be crying at the end of it.”

“Ugh. At that point, Halsin would be a much better best man than Gale. Wyll’s not even here, and he would be better! I could pull out a chair with Wyll’s name painted on it, and it would be the best best man ever!” Noticing her bursting out laughing, he rolled his eyes. “Darling really!”

She kissed him for what Astarion definitely thought lingered for a second too long and smiled. “We don’t even have to have a best man or maid of honor. That’s more of a Baldurian tradition, but we don’t have to go along with it. After all,” she wrinkled her nose, grinning. “We’re not exactly a traditional couple.”

Astarion nodded silently.

No, we’re not a traditional couple by any definition.

Elf. Human.

Vampire. Mortal.

Shorter than her. Very tall.

Perfectly lithe and built like a god. A deliciously sexy cream puff come to life.

But that’s just us, and that’s wonderful.

The conversation moved on to colors (white with hints of silver and gold), then to guests (apparently we do in fact have to invite Gale), and then drifted to food (Agi wants at least four tiers with each tier being different flavors to accommodate everyone’s tastes---just have it be your favorite and fuck them, darling!). After a while, Agnetha curled into Astarion’s side. He stared at the stars and then back down at the woman in his arms.

“I just realized something, sweetness.”

“Hmm?” Someone’s getting sleepy. It must be past two in the morning at least.

“I never got to ask you if wanted to marry me.”

She snuggled against his chest and sighed happily. “Yes, Astarion Ancunin, I will marry you.” She’s so sleepy. Aww. “I’ll always marry you, love…”

“I know, my darling girl. But before we can do any of that, my pretty princess needs some sleep.” He helped her to her feet, steadying her. “There’s a good girl, my love. Do you have the rune?” She charmed a pair of twin rune stones to act as a teleport directly into our bedroom, which I may or may not have abused on several occasions. She nodded, and he took it out of one of her dress pockets (you’re welcome, my beautiful butter bun) and used to get them there. He sat her on their bed and cupped her face. “May I undress you, darling?”

“Yes please…”

Everything off and in a pile. Her favorite sleep shirt and shorts. The silkiest bottoms for me. Perfect. “Have the sweetest dreams for us, my darling girl. I’ll be here when you wake.” He murmured, as he relaxed in her embrace.

“Dream’s already come true, Star.” Agnetha said, sleepily pressing a kiss to his neck. “We’re living the dream…”

He barked a laugh. “You impossibly sweet thing! Whatever am I going to do with you?”

Say it. Say it. Say it. Please, darling?

“You’ll marry me, and I’ll marry you…”

Thank you. His eyes watered as he held one of her hands.

We already belong to each other, but to not only show that but also celebrate it? When I couldn’t even dream of that a year ago? When we both have people we care about in our lives to celebrate with us? With her by my side?

Always.

[theshotsheardacrossworlds]

THEY ARE IN LOVE, YOUR HONOR

Dwarf!Agi and Gale courtesy of the lovely @btanselanoican

[theshotsheardacrossworlds]

Horace

Prompt fill for "a last minute emergency means they have to bring someone else with them on the date (e.g. child, little sibling, pet)" from here featuring Modern AU Beatrice and Zevlor...and Horace the corgi. SFW.

Special shoutout to @notyournhaama for continued support and choosing the prompt!

Beatrice: Hey Zev, turns out my roommate fucked off for the weekend and since my mum is away, I’ll need to bring Horace on our date. Is that okay? If not, that’s totally understandable and we can reschedule for another time.

Zevlor: No problem at all. See you tomorrow. <3

Beatrice: Thank you so much! See you then <3

***

“Ah, so that’s the famous Horace.” Zevlor teased as Beatrice and her corgi Horace approached him at the entrance to Bloomridge Park. This was their fifth date, for which he planned a romantic picnic in what he discovered to be her favorite park in Baldur’s Gate. My goodness, she looks stunning. What a pretty lavender sundress she’s wearing that shows off all her…assets. He glanced at the corgi and offered his hand for the dog to sniff. I see I meet with his approval. Good, good. I do so very much like your mistress, Horace.

Beatrice was beaming at the two. “Aw, you two are adorable! I’m sorry about—”

He met her gaze and smiled affectionately. She’s blushing! She’s truly the sweetest. “I told you---it’s not a problem, my dear. I even packed a treat or two for a certain good boy.”

Her brown eyes widened as she took the arm he offered her. “You didn’t have to! Now I feel bad. I can reimburse you, if you want.”

Like Hells you will, darling. “Bea, please. A few treats and a tennis ball didn’t put me out that much. My army pension and work at the bakery are more than enough, so please don’t worry.” She’s been open and honest with me about her anxiety…I do not wish to add to it.

“Okay, Zev.”

My gods, my heart is going to beat through my chest. The way she said my name. That sweet little smile. How…why…does she want me? Finding a bench under the shade of a large tree, he unpacked their picnic while she poured some water in a portable bowl for Horace. “Granted, I know little of how to train pet therapy dogs, but I’d say you’re doing famously with him, darling.”

Taking a bite of the salad he made, she smiled, her freckled cheeks flushing. “Oh thank you! Honestly, he makes it really easy. Horace has always been very chill, doesn’t go crazy barking at everything…anyways, I’m glad you like him. Or at least, tolerate him.” She took another bite and leaned back against the bench, chewing thoughtfully. “I couldn’t be with someone who didn’t like him.” Beatrice turned her head, her gaze meeting his.

Lathander’s light, is she—

Zevlor swallowed. “Am I that someone?” Please, let it be me.

“If you want to be.” Her voice was barely above a whisper, and he thought at first, he did not hear her correctly. Before he could respond, she continued and began to ramble adorably. “I know you’re older than me. You’re a tiefling. I’m a half-drow. You’re from Elturel. I’m from the Gate. But…” Her nose scrunched a little as she pouted even more adorably. Good gods, I’m not going to be able to say no to her, am I? “I like you, Zevlor. I’ve not had the best time dating,” Give me names, darling. “But with you? It’s been lovely so far, and I hope we…we…um…” She had neglected to notice Zevlor’s face inching closer to hers until their lips almost touched. “We could date? If that’s something you want? I—”

As his lips touched hers, he quite deftly removed the container of salad from her hands and placed it behind her. His hands then settled on her ample waist as he inched closer to her. “There’s nothing I want more, sweetheart.”

“Oh thank fuck for that, because I was so worried—”

He hummed softly as he kissed her again, and this time, he tugged on her lower lip ever so slightly. “You needn’t worry. Not anymore.”

Zevlor was not sure why those particular words resonated with his lady.

All he knew was that after he said that she blushed more, squealed, wrapping her long arms around his neck, and kissed him passionately, moaning into his mouth.

Which was interrupted by Beatrice yelping when Horace licked her leg.

Horace, I thought you were on my side here!

“You naughty boy!” She laughed and picked up the corgi who began to lick him as well as her. “Mummy getting too much attention from Zev? Well too bad, Horace, because he’s going to be spending a lot more time with us.”

Those words resonated with Zevlor for all too familiar reasons. Since their first date (though if I’m being honest with myself, from the moment I saw her walk into Bex’s with her friend), he imagined them spending time together. However, he surprised himself with how domestic most of his fantasies were---cuddling, planning dates together, stealing kisses, holding her hand. Those were the fantasies that made him feel happy. And then there are the less than wholesome fantasies that make me feel like an old lecher.

She rubbed Horace’s head before placing him back on the blanket at her and Zevlor’s feet. “Maybe spending more time together…today?” Beatrice grinned. “With Nadia gone, I have the entire loft to myself. I could give you the grand tour,” Gods, you have the sweetest laugh. “And maybe watch a movie? Sit out on the deck? Whatever you want, Zev.”

Where have you been all my life? All the hardship and heartbreak…the horrors of war…being forced to leave Elturel…starting over in Baldur’s Gate…it’s all led me to you. Reaching for his beer, he sipped as he leaned back and with his other arm, wrapped it around her. “That sounds lovely, darling.”

She grabbed the container of salad and continued to eat. “Don’t worry---I’ll make sure to lock my bedroom door, so we don’t have Horace barging—OH.” Hilariously, she froze, her brown eyes wide. “What I mean is…umm…”

Alright, Zevlor. Let’s see if you still have it.

“As wonderful as Horace is, dear, the only tongue I want near me in your bedroom is yours.” He quipped, sipping his beer and smirking upon seeing her face blush darker than he had ever seen it.

Still got it.

[theshotsheardacrossworlds]

Light

Selune commanded Beatrice to be a light for others to follow. SFW.

When Beatrice was a young girl, her patron goddess spoke to her.

“Be a light in the darkness for others to follow, my child.”

When Beatrice felt the call to protect others in the Moonmaiden’s name, her patron goddess once again spoke to her.

“Be a light in the darkness for others to follow. Be my righteous fury.”

When Beatrice’s father was dying, her patron goddess spoke to her again.

“Do not let your light dim, little one. Be a light in the darkness for others to follow.”

When Beatrice lay awake in the Shadow Cursed Lands after discovering her lover surrendered (I will not accept that he betrayed his people), her goddess spoke to her.

“Be a light in the darkness for him to follow.”

“For whom? Gale? I’m trying very hard to convince him not to blow himself up!” The half-drow cried out in frustration. “Astarion? Halsin? Wyll? Rolan? Rolan’s brother in Moonrise? Bex’s husband what’s his face? Who?!”

The night before the battle at Moonrise Towers, Selune spoke to her again.

“Be a light in the darkness for him to follow. He will need you, my righteous fury.”

Beatrice assumed Selune was referring to Gale, who still thinks using the orb is a good idea. Karlach nailed it---fucking wizards, man.

She understood as soon as she saw Zevlor, alive but unconscious, in a pod in the mind flayer colony that it was him her goddess had meant.

Be a light for him to follow.

Got it.

Except, not quite.

“Be his light, my child. Guide him out of darkness.”

Beatrice quickly realized the darkness was never the Shadow Curse she was meant to lead him from safely.

“Zev, it wasn’t your fault! I told you that you were being enthralled!” she groaned, dragging a hand down her face. “The Absolute is a fucking Elder Brain! Of course you couldn’t resist!”

Listen to me, you stubborn man. LISTEN. TO. ME.

The tiefling shook his head sadly. “Pulchra, I know it must be painful for you to think of me this way, but I-I was—”

“Being enthralled. By an Elder Brain. Wearing a Netherese crown, according to Gale.” She crossed her arms over her chest and frowned. “Without the prism, I would’ve been a mind flayer long time ago, love. Very few can resist an Elder Brain on their own. People like us can’t without help.” She moved to take his calloused hands in hers, her gaze meeting his. “Zevlor, if I didn’t think you’re a good man, then I wouldn’t love you. You are a good man---one of the best I know. I love you. What happened was not your fault, love. It wasn’t. Just like it wasn’t my fault that I got abducted. Please, please forgive yourself.” She closed her eyes for a moment and sighed. “At the very least, do you believe me when I say the Absolute is an Elder Brain?”

Zevlor’s expression shifted from one form of hurt to another. “O-oh, Bea sweetheart, I never…I don’t doubt your honesty. Never. I simply…I should’ve been stronger.” He shook his head. “The truth is that I’m a tired old man who wants his rest. I’m not the paladin I was.”

I refuse to let you go down this path.

Light the way for him to follow.

With a determined look in her eyes, she began. “Hey, you are my tired old man. You will be getting your rest when all this is over. I will ensure that.” Smile at him, damnit. Don’t just go into one of your silly, self-righteous mini speeches. “I want to do that for you, because I love you. I want us to have a life together where we both can relax and take care of each other.” The night in the grove… “We deserve happiness, Zev, don’t we?”

He choked back a sob, squeezing her hands. “Y-yes. Yes, we do.” He does remember that night.

“We’ll take care of each other, okay? You’re not alone. Not anymore. You have me.” I’m crying. Of course I am. “And I have you. My beautiful Zevlor, I have you.”

Unable to stop the tears any longer, he began to weep openly and moved to hug her. “I have you too, my little light. I have you.”

I know, love.

Did I…Moonmaiden, did I…?

However, she did not need to hear Selune’s words.

I know I did.

[theshotsheardacrossworlds]

WIP Sunday

This snippet is part of a 5-times-1-time fic with Agi and Astarion. It's very NSFW lol.

“Agi darling, I had Karlach test this chair with Lae’zel on one thigh and Shadowheart on the other. We’ll be fine!” Astarion explained for what he thought was the hundredth time. He remembered another spawn (Leon, I believe) saying that chair sex was good for women like my beautiful, voluptuous girl. Soooo that’s why I had the ladies test this chair for its sturdiness. “Agnetha dear?”

His lover stared at him like he grew a second head. “Alright, let’s just say that the chair won’t break,” It won’t but go ahead. “What if I hurt you? There’s a pretty significant weight difference between us, if I’m being honest.”

He raised a white eyebrow. “My love, I’m already dead---your fat ass isn’t going to kill me.” He drawled; eyes locked onto hers.

She opened and closed her mouth several times.

“Darling, you’re not a fish.” He teased. “Now granted, you’d be a delightful fish, but…” He walked to her and reached for her face. “If you don’t wish to try this, then it’s fine. But please know you won’t hurt me or break the chair. I promise.” Believe me. Please believe me. If I thought for a moment this wouldn’t be alright, then I wouldn’t have even considered it. You deserve all the pleasure I can give you. You deserve it all.

“If you’re sure, then…I can give it a try.” She gave him a quick kiss before they undressed, and Astarion sat down. Lowering herself slowly, Agnetha squeezed her eyes shut as he entered her. “O-oh fuck me…gods…Star!” My face is in her tits! There’s no better place to be. Once he was fully hilted inside her, she began to rock her hips and moaned wantonly. She never does this. I am full of the very best ideas! She cupped the back of his head, her fingers running through his curls. “This feels…so good, love…” Her eyes then burst open, as if she was remembering something important. “Are you—”

He pressed several kisses to her jaw and neck as his hands roamed her back. “Sh, sh, sh, none of that now. Take your pleasure, sweetness. There’s a good girl.” I said the magic words, which means she’ll be coming apart shortly. My darling girl…