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#B) would be happy to go around cleaning up the streets(literally) in exchange for a living wage
femwizard · 3 months
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Ecology win! The electric fence guarding them empty lot is powered by solar panels
#sure is a good thing the bridge nearby has bars under it protect it’s vulnerable underbelly#anti homeless architecture makes me insane#this morning on my commute to work there was someone losing their shit on the train#writhing in agony#matted hair#torn up shoes#they looked like a frat bro that got lost on a bad trip and had no one who could bring him back#it made me uncomfortable#but I was less afraid than when I had to walk by some business men by their truck#I’m sure they were also uncomfortable#I’m sure they would prefer to be somewhere they could call their own#even a safe little hole under a bridge or a tent in an empty lot could be better#especially if they knew no one would fuck with their shit#like? there is so so so much work I do that doesn’t need to happen#it seems like the less necessary something is the higher the monetary reward#& this is not a universal truth#but I got paid way less to talk to people about environmental policy or help them learn math#than when I sat in the back of a banking conference doing nothing#& there is so much shit that doesn’t get done that needs doing#there are camps surrounded by piles of trash#and literal shit in the middle of the sidewalk#I’m confident that the people that generated that unpleasantness#A) would rather throw shit in a trash can and shit in a proper toilet like a human being and not on the street like a dog#B) would be happy to go around cleaning up the streets(literally) in exchange for a living wage#and those jobs exist#but there clearly aren’t enough people doing them#just like we don’t have enough train drivers#and enough therapists#and enough cooks#and enough teachers
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bedtimebrain · 3 years
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EXO Chanyeol: Oppa?
First Chanyeol Scenario! And have you heard his ‘Without You’ ? Damn it got me stunned when i listened, i didnt know it was going to be the one by Mariah Carey. I mean ofc chanyeol doesn’t speak perfect English but what can get more attractive than him playing the electric guitar😭 His film’s gna be released globally soon, wish him the best! 
Also I took so long to write this, that by the time i’m done, he has enlisted:,) Sigh, Chanyeol, see you the 27th of every month!
Characters: Chanyeol x reader
You caught Chanyeol’s attention, but… You’re not so into rowdy guys. How will it turn out?
Ding Dong!
You were outside EXO’s dorm with a bottle of Cola. You didn’t really know EXO, in fact you only actually knew Jongin. The story goes where one night you saw a really sick man swaying side to side along the streets. Being the nice and kind soul you were, you went up to help. And that person turns out to be jongin, which at that point you didn’t know was an EXO member until much later when your friend showed you an EXO poster.
You helped him to the apartment building and you left your number with him out of worry because he insisted he head up alone. After that you guys somewhat became friends. And ever since you knew he was a celebrity, you occasionally ran errands for him just to save him some trouble.
‘Annyeong y/n! Thanks for buying the cola!’
‘Sure Jongin oppa! I’ll be leaving then !’
‘WAIT!!!’
Just as you were about to leave, a shout came from inside the house 
‘Annyeong Jongin Chingu! Are you free? Wanna join us? I wanted to play a 2v2 switch game but we are short of 1 person. THERE’S PIZZA HERE TOO, ARE YOU INTERESTED?!’
Honestly, you haven’t even spoken once with chanyeol but here he is, trying to aggressively convince you to play games together. Not exactly an extrovert yourself, that overpowering energy was quite a turn off for you. You raised a brow at Jongin, trying to ask him to get you out of this situation
‘Erm.. Actually, i...’ In your mind ran a 1000 different thoughts on what’s the best way to politely reject this but you just couldn’t think of any, just then jongin finally cut in, only to say
‘Yeh come join us! It’s going to be fun, plus I’m sure you haven’t eaten dinner too’
Although you were a still a little reluctant, you relented for the sake of Jongin and entered the house. Seeing Sehun was also in the house, you both greeted each other politely and you proceed to sit quietly by the dining table. 
‘LET’S EAT QUICK CANT WAIT TO TRY THE NEW GAME’ Chanyeol just sounded overly excited about this. 
Over dinner, Chanyeol in particular was really friendly with you, probably just trying to make you feel comfortable as he tried to get to know you. But after a while, the conversation floats back to him talking about himself. You weren’t complaining though.
‘Okay so that day..’ Chanyeol begun his 5th or 6th anecdote during the dinner but couldn’t stop laughing before he could even get started on it.
He was laughing so hard he started hitting jongin beside him and his exaggerated movements actually hit the table so hard it toppled your coke glass over onto you
‘oh my gawd!’ you reacted in reflex and got up immediately from your chair.
‘HYUNG! SERIOUSLY?!’ Jongin reacted with shock then laughter. He quickly passed you some tissue 
‘Let’s just clean up right now and start the games’ Sehun added calmly 
‘Y/N I’M SO SORRY. LET ME GET YOU SOMETHING TO CHANGE INTO, IM SO SORRY’ 
You could tell Chanyeol was really feeling sorry when you saw that panic in his eyes when the coke spilled. Though it’s really weird to be wearing some other guy’s clothes when you just knew him for hours, you couldn’t be possibly telling him you would only wear jongin’s and not his... So you followed him to grab something to change into 
Stepping into his room you can’t help but get abit wide eyed. His room was almost like what you would imagine a musician’s to be. Guitar, piano, bass, iMac, subwoofer etc. You were so amazed you couldn’t stop glancing around as he tries to uncover some clothes from the depths of his cabinet.
Finally finding it, chanyeol turned around and caught how your face literally wrote ‘amazement’,  he couldn’t help but laughed beneath his breath before handing a sweater to you.
‘Why do you look so amazed? Your expression made it look like you just walked into a museum.’ Chanyeol asked
You felt embarrassed from his question and was absolutely tongue tied. Looking towards the corner of the room you caught sight of a basketball and a miniature basketball hoop. You quickly switched the topic
‘um you play basketball too?’
‘Yes I do! Like in my free time, once in a while. Outdoor activities keep me sane when I feel like I need a break, apart from jamming of course, as you can see. Why, do u play too?’
‘Oh I see, haha. And yes I play basketball too.’
‘I wasn’t expecting that! You really dont look like it though! What’s...’ before he could finish his sentence, jongin came into the room to check on you.
Breaking off that small talk with chanyeol, you changed out of your dirty top into the sweater. Sigh, the game hasn’t even started but you were almost already drained. 
—-
2 hours into the game, you were getting really really sucked out of energy. Looking at chanyeol still so engrossed in the game, you wonder how could he still remain so fired up.
Just then the bell rang and the boys looked at each other, 
‘Who’s that? Any of you got delivery ?’ Sehun asked as he walked towards the door. Looking through the peek hole before opening the door.
‘Ah Suho Hyung, why did you not open the door on your own’ Sehun asked
‘I left them in the car, too lazy to grab it. Oh, hi y/n, what you doing here?’
Feeling really tired now, your honesty got the better of you and you replied without thinking 
‘Hi Suho-ssi, I got called to play some games, but now i’m stuck here’
‘Ya, you punks , it’s really late now you know. It’s way past 1030, Y/N still needs to walk home. Just shut off the game right now.
And Chanyeol didn’t you say you were meeting your high school friends tonight?’
At this Chanyeol loudly cursed then exclaimed
‘AH RIGHT I FORGOT! I GOT TO GET CHANGED NOW’ 
Phew, Suho surely is a life savior. More than happy to be out of this situation, you quickly packed your stuff and thanked the boys
‘I’ll be leaving, thanks for having me today and the free pizza.I had fun. Jong-in oppa please tell Chanyeol ssi i’ll wash his sweater before returning to him.’
At the same time chanyeol came out from his room hastily,
‘Y/N wait for me! Let’s leave together!’
You would have preferred having some quiet time by yourself right now, but you didn’t want to make things awkward by saying no. Seeing how Chanyeol got comfortable with people so quickly was beyond your understanding.
You were always took really long to warm up to new people unless you could really click with them, just like jongin.
‘Ah thanks for waiting, let’s go! Where do you stay? Is it near?’
Trying your best at a comfortable and casual tone, you replied ‘Uh yes it’s just about 5 to 10 minutes away if I walk. Where you going to?’
‘Oh just meeting my friends for supper. Let me walk you home since it’s not too far, anyway my friends are still on the way
So you were saying you play basketball do u watch nba or something ? What position do you play’ Chanyeol naturally strike a conversation with you
‘I DONT really follow, but yeh I check out the highlights and stuff. I play the Center position’
‘SERIOUS?! YOU’RE NOT VERY BUILT FOR A CENTER!’ You must be really good then!’ Chanyeol seemed to genuinely be amazed 
Chuckling a little, you just shrugged and said
‘Erm yeh but the coach just thinks I’m pretty tough I guess.’
‘Oh and i heard from jong-in you didn’t know EXO until recently, so what music do you like ?’
Feeling a little self conscious about the fact that a musician is here asking you bout your music taste, you answered hesitantly
‘ R&B, acoustics, ballads , those sort? Ed Sheeren , AKMU and some other English oldies’
‘Then do you know ‘Without you’ by Mariah Cary? I’ve been listening to it lately and it’s been stuck in my head!’
Laughing at how random that was, you softly started singing along with him as he started. 
At this hour of the day, at about 11 pm your mind isn’t too functional to overthink, you felt like you were loosening up towards him. Though he was a little too over enthusiastic and animated, you somehow liked that he seemed to have this innocence to him.
Just as your short jam ended, you have also reached your apartment
‘I’ve reached! Thanks for walking me back. Bye, drive safely later!’
You flashed a smile, bowed politely and was ready to head in, but chanyeol actually called out before you could head off
‘y/n! Wanna exchange numbers? We could go shoot some hoops at arcade someday or just ball.’
You were not too keen actually, wanting to just keep your relationship with him as simply acquaintances.  Thinking bout how to put the rejection across nicely , you said
‘Oh, thanks for offering. But I’m really not a night person . And you know, you guys being EXO and got to be stealthy , everything goes on at night. Really not my thing though, I don’t think we can ever match a time.’
But turns out he was more insistent than you thought
‘Oh then I could invite you for games or a jam session ! I wouldn’t say we have exactly similar tastes in music but I do like the music you listen to and you sound great singing!’
That made you blush a little , partly embarrassment partly being shy at his straightforward words.
‘It’s fine chanyeol-ssi, I’ll just see you at your dorm when I pass by to see Jongin oppa and return your sweater. Bye’
—-
For the next 2 weeks, you somehow got more frequent calls from Jongin to run errands for him. But when you turned up at their dorms and Chanyeol was in, he would either be the one to get the door or be inviting you in for whatever they were doing. 
Today afternoon, you were over at their dorms again, but just with jongin and chanyeol. You had bought tteokbokki and corndog for yourself and decided to buy some for EXO too, but turns out it was just the 2 that were in. 
‘ah, y/n thanks for the food. i’m going to change and leave for dance practice soon’ 
‘you’re welcome jongin oppa, i’ll leave soon too’
just as jongin headed to the room, chanyeol took the chance to ask
‘y/n are you free? Do you want to hangout together instead? Since i’m free today and you’re already here.’ Chanyeol asked expectantly. 
You were already much more comfortable with him, but together in the house? You wouldn’t even with Jongin.
‘Erm, Chanyeol-ssi, it’s okay. I’m not too comfortable staying in the house with another guy ..’ you said it hesitantly, feeling a little bad for rejecting him. 
‘Oh actually, I meant to head out, there’s this place which I thought both of us will like’
oh shucks, that was embarrassing. In an attempt to cover up your embarrassment, you laughed abit harder than you should and agreed more enthusiastic than you would normally
‘OH ! HAHA! Ok, sure then let’s go!’
Almost instantly, you saw Chanyeol’s eyes brighten up. He got up immediately got changed and you both headed out.
In the car ride, you finally calmed your senses down and became sane enough to realise
‘Chanyeol-ssi it’s still pretty early right? Wouldn’t you heading out with me like this be really dangerous?’
Stopping his incessant rap and singing ever since you got in his car, he replied
‘There’s this arcade I used to go to when I was a student. It’s really old now and no one really goes there anymore. It closes around 5pm everyday , but I know the boss! I’m gonna ask him to just let us use the place for a short while’
With one hand on the steering wheel, he looked at you and was bubbling with excitement as he explained. You laughed seeing how excited he was, somehow also making you look forward to the fun to come.
Being really chatty as usual, he spoke the whole ride about anything and everything, slowly without even knowing, you dozed off.
The next moment you woke up, the sun was already starting to set and you’ve both reached the arcade, which was on the second floor along a shophouse street.
It looked so rundown and shady from the outside. The signboard was unlit and had completely yellowed. The window panes were blue tainted and so dusty you could see the dust from the streets.
‘Chanyeol Ssi are you sure about this? Please don’t bring me to a haunted house’
‘Ya, trust me, you’ll be surprised’
Together you headed towards the dark staircase that led you guys to the arcade. You struggled to catch up with his pace as he went up the stairs. The narrow and unlit staircase made you so jumpy that when the lights suddenly came on, you quickly latched your hand onto chanyeol’s sleeves without thinking.
Laughing at how scared you were, chanyeol slowed down his pace, walking side by side with you instead.
‘Why you so scared! We’re reaching soon, don’t worry, it’s hella cool place!’
Not really having the capacity to respond now, you continued holding on to his sleeves until you reached the end of the stairs.
Letting go, you awkwardly said thanks and entered the arcade, finding that it was certainly better than you thought but not fantastic.
‘Lee Soo Hyung! I brought my friend here today , could you let us use for about an hour + after you close?’
‘Chanyeol ah! It’s been a while! After all these years I finally see you with a girl. Hello Agassi, why did you come here with him? Be careful he doesn’t slaughter you like how he does when he plays games with his friends’
Not knowing to whether tears of joy or sadness would fit this situation, you raised your brows at chanyeol.
‘Alright I’ll leave this place to you guys, I’ll be back in about 2 hours after I eat and run my errands’
-
2 hours passed by in a flash. And you sure had lots of fun, shooting hoops, playing Daytona, Mario kart , and even challenging him to dance on pump it up. All of which u lost rather miserably cause you were just horrendous at games.
As you both left the arcade, you thought back in realisation that you didn’t see that annoying over competitiveness today in him today. Instead it felt Chanyeol wanted to make it fun for the both of you rather than winning you.
Internally feeling a little touched about this, you thought to subtly show your gratitude by treating him later.
Walking out of the stairs to the streets, you saw Baskin Robbins just right across, below a dancing school.
‘Chanyeol ssi! Let me buy you ice cream ok! Let’s cross the road to Baskin Robbins’
‘Haha, y/n why the sudden treat? I’m not complaining though, I want Choco mint in a cone’
You went into the shop and placed the order for the ice cream. But when you came out, there was a commotion right outside the shop and realised chanyeol was in ‘trouble’. 
You panicked internally , where did the fangirls come from? They all surrounded chanyeol and were squealing and asking for pictures.
You headed back into baskin Robbins, not too sure what you should do. It’s not going to turn out well if he is seen with you.. Should you head off first? Or should you help him?
With one hand holding on nervously to the ice cream you looked intently at the situation outside, with a total mind blank.
Only about 15minutes later, you saw chanyeol managed to escape back to his car as the crowd in this secluded area eventually died down.
You didn’t head out to find him, worried that if any Fangirls were left, you would land him in trouble.
You stayed at in the shop, looking at the melted ice cream you bought for him, should you just dump this away? Do you head off yourself soon?
Just then a call came in
‘Y/N! Where are you? I’m so sorry I got caught by those dance school girls. Are you alright ? Where did you go ? In case you’re wondering, i got your number from jongin to contact you’
‘Chanyeol -ssi...? Are u ok? I’m just waiting at baskin robbins .. just head home without me, I’ll just find my way back..’ feeling still at loss about the situation, you replied with a heavy heart
‘Ah, no, just head down to the alley behind I’ll pick you up from there. This place is too secluded , I’m not going to leave you here alone’
‘But ..’
‘Just meet me there’
Feeling down and guilty that this was kind of your fault. You walked mindlessly to the alley with the half melted ice cream. If it were not for you, chanyeol wouldn’t even be heading out in the afternoon right?
As you entered the car, you kept quiet not really knowing what to say. But Chanyeol started apologising repeatedly, and telling you about the whole situation earlier
But all that ran through your mind was how risky the situation was and how bad you felt. You were still quite in shock as you processed that just happened
‘Chanyeol ssi, why did you bring me out today? Seeing that made me realise the severity of how dangerous it could have been for you if you were caught together with me.. and I can’t help but feel it’s my fault you got surrounded by those fan girls..’
Pausing before continuing, you added
‘Let’s never do this again. I’m really sorry’
‘Don’t be sorry, i am not even blaming you or anything! Plus i was the one who wanted us to hang outside together. I knew this might happen, but i still wanted to have fun with you’
‘Why Chanyeol-ssi?’
Without thinking, he answered almost immediately 
‘Because i just find you cute’ 
You blanked out completely as those words, you could feel blood rushing through your cheeks. 
You started externally processing your thoughts out of nervousness and panic
‘i know this sounds ridiculous but are you like interested in me? i know i am blushing like mad right now but im not really into loud guys. and though i had lots of fun with you just now i think you should just give up if you are even thinking of anything’ you went on rambling not even knowing what in the world you just said
He looked at you seeming to have something to say. But then looked at the messy ice cream and decided to reached for it instead.
‘thank you for this ice cream, and y/n whatever you said…honestly, can i just have 1 thing from you?’
‘uh what is it?’
‘can you just call me Chanyeol Oppa instead?’
Your heart skipped a beat at what he said and you could feel his gaze was still on you.
After a few moments of silence that hung heavy in the air, you shyly and softly asked
‘Chanyeol oppa shall we go back now?’
Still feeling shy to look at him, you stole a glance at the rear view mirror and saw Chanyeol smile the widest smile you have ever seen since you guys met. 
Finishing off the ice cream, he started the engine, ready to drive off. But before stepping the accelerator, he looked up at the rear view mirror and you both caught each other’s eyes and both looked away almost immediately smiling shyly when your eyes met briefly. 
As the car speeded off, you kept your eyes on the side view mirror, and you were glad you weren’t the only one smiling like an idiot the whole ride back. 
Was this a little boring? I read through it multiple times and can’t really tell anymore. i hope it was fun for you guys who read it for the first time~ though i must admit if i read a fanfic with such an ending i might feel lowkey unsatisfied :p
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managedmischiefs · 3 years
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north//chapter fourteen
genre: angst
pairing: season twelve spencer reid x female oc
warnings: description of physical assault, prison, just all of the bad prison arc stuff
word count: 4.7k
summary: spencer and amelia feel the effects of being forcibly separated and it impacts them in similar ways.
honestly, spencer’s pov in this chapter is one of my favorite things i’ve ever written so i hope everyone enjoys it <3
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AMELIA
"Come on! You don't even have to do anything! Just go and clean up. We'll go with you and help!" Yaz pokes my shoulder incessantly, trying to get a reaction out of me. But I just keep my eyes on the tv in front of me, bundled up under a blanket.
"Lia," Michael sighs and slings his arm over my shoulder. I want nothing more than to shove it off. “It's been like, three months since-"
I'm quick to speak up to correct him. "Two and a half."
Michael and Quinn exchange a tense look. "Okay," Quinn nods, "two and a half months. It's been two and a half months since you've drawn, or painted, or sketched, or done anything even related to art. We know you're upset about Spencer but you can't let yourself be so upset. You need to find something that's gonna bring you happiness, and art has always done that."
"I don't wanna," I answer like a stubborn child, an answer that any of my siblings would have given me about things like going to bed early or eating vegetables. I pull the blanket up to my chin and stroke my thumb across my newest tattoo, tucked away and out of the sights of my nosy, annoying friends.
Frankie turns and shushes Quinn. "Like I said, Lia, why don't we go and just clean up your studio? We can drive over and just clean up? That's it. You don't have to do a photoshoot or create anything new. Just clean. Sound good? An hour tops."
I look around the faces of my expecting friends and tighten my jaw. I try to steal Spencer's skills and profile what their ulterior motives could be. They all hated Spencer before meeting him, and even after they met him, they weren't completely fond of him. So why are they trying so hard to get me to feel better? Why does it feel like they’re trying to get me to forget about my boyfriend in prison? I should be worrying about him every second of my day instead of prancing around town, cleaning up my studio, and going about my life as if Spencer isn’t suffering. But I’m sure they mean well. And I’m absolutely positive that my legs are sore from sleeping on the couch and from being in that same position all day.
"Fine," I concede, and they all silently cheer. "But I'm driving myself."
The drive to my studio is nearly insufferable. It’s silent and overwhelmed with a tension that I created but can’t seem to let go. The sights around me are familiar but blurry, like I can’t even tell which stores are which without someone in my passenger seat spitting out fact after fact after fact as I drive. I can’t drive down the street and try to recall all the good times and all the dates and all the drunken stumbles back home with the love of my life on my arm. It’s far too painful to constantly remember that I can’t go home and see Spencer and I can’t spend hours on the phone with him like I do when he is away on a case. I can’t see him. 
When I arrive at my studio, I realize why they were so insistent that I come out to clean up. I can't remember the last time I was actually in here to work but it's an absolute mess. There are canvases everywhere, bottles and tubes of paint on the floor, splashes and splatters of paint on the walls, brushes everywhere, crumbled up sketches in the trash, and way more. The studio needs much love and I guess now is the time to give it.
Michael immediately turns on music and everyone gets to work, but I don't. I pick up an empty tube of yellow paint and squeeze it in my palm. My head is starting to pound and I can't even stop it as tears start to fall down my cheeks. Who knew that one person could produce so many tears? 
Spencer loved when I wore yellow. I have this one short, backless dress that he loved. He especially loved that he had easy access to my skin, always tracing shapes on my back and murmuring about how soft my skin is. He always said that he loved the way the yellow complimented my blonde hair and how it contrasted against my colorful tattoos. He even went as far as to buy me another yellow dress for my birthday last year. 
And he loved when I used yellow in my paintings too. One time, I sent him a picture of a piece I was working on and he emailed back a book about how the use of yellow paint expressed the happiness of the piece or something like that. He raved about a painting I did of the sun and how my use of yellow wasn’t scientifically accurate, but it was beautiful nonetheless. 
"Amelia?" Quinn speaks but I don't look at her. My cheeks are wet with tears that I barely noticed and my hands are clutching the tube of paint so tightly that it would burst if it were full. "I'm sorry. We didn't mean to upset you. If we-"
"I'm gonna go," I say hastily, clutching the empty tube in my hand as I breeze out of the studio, leaving my bewildered friends to either clean or leave. They know the way out and they know where the keys are. They don’t need me.
I'm wandering into the bullpen like it's second nature because, at this point, it basically is. Nobody on the team bothers to say anything to me. They never do. They're too worried I'll blow up at them or start crying. I don't blame them.
I rap my knuckles against Dave's door and wait for him to shout for me to come in, and when he does, I enter slowly. He gives me a small, pitiful smile as I move in front of his desk. I set the empty yellow paint tube in front of him and then sit down, bringing my knees to my chest.
Dave looks down at the tube, his eyebrows furrowing. "Paint? What's this?"
I blink and it forces tears out of my eyes. "I don't know how to live without Spencer."
Dave leans back in his chair, crossing his arms over my chest. He studies me, profiles me. I hate when Spencer did that. He always got this look on his face when he profiled me, but Dave has a better poker face. "And paint has something to do with that?"
"I just went to my studio with my friends and I finished off all this paint and there were brushes all over the floor and-" tears start pouring down my cheeks again, wetting my neck and the neckline of my sweater. "I came home the other day and I'd left the balcony door open. How stupid. I'm forgetting to lock my doors just because my boyfriend is in p-" I gulp, having to force out the disgusting word, "prison. How fucking stupid. How stupid am I that I can't function without him?"
"You're not stupid," Dave shakes his head. Nothing about his tone or his body language is helpful in the slightest. Nothing and nobody will help. "You two are reliant on each other and that's not a bad thing. I'm sure Boy Genius is always on you about locking your doors and I'm sure he's always giving you statistics on break ins and-"
"He doesn't," I cut him off sharply. "If Spencer's telling me statistics then it's about stars in the sky and how to properly care for my plants so they stay alive longer or just- it's never about things you guys talk about here. It always about things that I'd like. He does it to protect me. He doesn't tell me about serial killers unless I ask, and I only ask when I can see that he had a really hard day at work. It's just me, Dave," I put my forehead to my knees, shoulder shaking as sobs take over my whole body. "I just don't know how to live without him. I don't know how to function without him holding my hand and him calling me to promise he's okay and-- I just can't. I can't do it."
"You did it before you met him," Dave stands from his desk and moves in front of me. He puts his cold hand on my shoulder and it sends a chill down my spine. "You lived a long life before you met him, and you're living now while he's temporarily gone. It's hard, I know, but it's only for a short time."
"I just want him to be okay. That's all I really care about."
///
SPENCER
///
My whole job is about helping people and I've spent my whole life caring for others, mostly my mother. In my professional life, I'm always keeping an eye on my teammates to make sure they aren't in danger. I consider it to be part of my responsibility to look after every single one of my teammates. They're my family and I rely on them to help me too.
I never thought my helpful nature would come back to hurt me. I never thought that trying to help out a friend would come back to hurt me so badly. All I wanted to do was help Delgado. That's it. Calvin is protecting me and the other men in here wouldn't dare to cross him. They know how miserable he could make their experience here and they'd rather beat up someone else than get on Calvin's bad side.
All I did was speak to a correctional officer at chow. That's literally all I did. Yes, I did rat out the gang to the officer for beating up Delgado, but they don't know that. They aren't going to be disciplined for it. I ask the guard for water first as a cover, but clearly, it wasn't enough.
And I've been through a lot in the field. I've been tackled, and punched, and shot, but getting beaten up in a prison is completely different. The guards couldn't care less about the inmates. No matter how much I screamed and pleaded for help, no one came. And even still, there was another inmate outside my cell keeping watch so my attackers could run and not get caught.
I’ve gotten beaten up a lot in my line of work and I can confidently say that this one, in a dirty prison cell, is the worst I’ve received. They held me down against my bed and used a rag to muffle me, but it covered my mouth and nose and it almost suffocated me. They beat me to a pulp, drawing blood on my forehead and almost cracking a rib or two.
It was an unrelenting beating and I eventually succumbed to the pain because I convinced myself that they were going to kill me. I snitched and death would be the consequence. I stopped fighting and just let them take their turns at swiping my face and my chest and my stomach because what could I do? Nothing. As Calvin loves to remind me, the rules are different in here. I don't have a badge and a gun to make the torture stop. I have to endure it or find my own ways to make it stop, and this is a moment to endure it. I'm rendered useless.
The beating only ended when the inmate outside whistled, probably a preplanned signal, because the two others immediately jumped off of me and ran out of my cell. As soon as the towel was pulled away from my face, I gasped in a breath and clutched my aching chest, wincing in pain.
Wilkins came strolling over, peering into my cell. I knew he knew exactly what had just happened by the smirk on his face, but he chose to do nothing. He chose to stroll over instead of running and he didn't yell at the other inmates. He just stared at me and smirked, shaking his head.
"That'll teach you to keep your mouth shut, Snitch."
And those are the words that echoed in my nightmare that night.
I'd rolled over and coughed up a generous amount of blood, grimacing at the taste in my mouth. My body trembled and shook when Wilkins left, even more than when he was silently mocking and watching me. Wilkins doesn’t care to do his job but at least with him standing at my cell door, I had the tiniest bit of protection. But with him gone, the other inmates could come back and finish the job. I shook and stayed rolled over on my side for twenty minutes, staring at the floor and waiting for my cell to close.
When it finally did close, I didn't even let myself sigh of relief. I just fell onto my back again with a groan. I could barely move. It hurt too bad. Everything always hurts nowadays. Things didn't hurt on the outside. Living didn't hurt before I got arrested.
Getting visitors the next morning is not what the ideal situation is. Rising from bed is more of a challenge than it normally is. My body is sore and aching and all I want to do is curl up in my obnoxiously uncomfortable bed, if this slab of metal and a blanket could be considered a bed, and go back to sleep. But I know I'll get in trouble if I don't get up for role call, so I ignore the pain.
I don't dare to look around at anyone on my block as the officer shouts our names, checking to see that we're all here. I just keep my head held high and my hands at my sides and try to show that I couldn't care less about the beating that is causing me so much unrelenting pain.
But then they call our names for a visitor’s session and, of course, my name gets called. I'm usually grateful to get to see anyone from my team, but now? Today? After last night? I'd prefer if they didn't come back until after these bruises were gone. But there's nothing I can do so I allow the guards to put cuffs on me and lead me to the visitor’s room.
As soon as Penelope sees me, she gasps and drops her jaw. She starts to rise to her feet, but I sharpen my glare at her and when she sees my expression, she stays in her seat. When I sit down at the little table and put my cuffed hands in view, like I'm required to, I watch her eyes fill with tears.
"You-" she whispers, "you're hurt. What happened?"
"It's not a big deal," I answer nonchalantly. "It could've been worse." She's not convinced, her jaw dropped as a few tears drip down her cheeks. I keep my jaw tight and as much as I want to comfort her and hug her and promise that as badly as this hurts and as horrible as I'm sure I look, I'll be fine. But there are a million eyes on me right now, including my assailants, and if I show any kind of weakness, a beating like last nights will surely be in store for me again.
Penelope not-so-subtly glances around at the other prisoners around us. "Reid," she leans towards me and tries to lower her voice, "I am going to march right down to the warden’s office and I'm going to-"
"No, you're not," I snap, and my sharp tone of voice makes her jump back, her eyes widening. But for some reason, the look on her face doesn't even make me regret the way I've spoken to her. The look on her face just bothers me more. Why doesn't she get it? Clearly, I have to spell it out for her. "It'll just make worse things. I've got it handled, Garcia."
"Are you sure?" She practically whimpers. "I could-"
"How's everyone else? How's the team? How's my mom?" I deflect from the obvious issue at hand and instead turn the focus to my loved ones. All but the one I wanna hear about.
Penelope starts to nod slowly and she moves her glasses to wipe her cheeks free of tears. "We really miss you. And in our free time, we're working really hard on your-"
"Shh," I try to hold my hands out but the handcuffs rattle, and my eyes dart over to a guard who is alerted by my movement. He gives me a pointed look as if telling me not to do anything stupid. I put my hands back down and look over at a stunned Penelope, leaning in closer. "Don't talk about my case, Garcia. People don’t do that in here. It’s not right and it’s not safe. Just don't talk about it."
She gulps harshly, another single tear dripping down her cheek. "Okay," she nods again, and it's obvious that she's confused. But I don't have the time or the energy to explain why I'm acting like this and I don't even have it in me to care. I didn't even want to be at this visitor’s meeting. I'm only here because I have to be. "Um," she taps her fingers against the table, "we just really miss you, Spencer. Your mom is doing really well with Cassie."
"Good, I'm glad everyone is okay," I nod and I sit back, glancing around for a clock. When is this thing over? I'd rather be in my cell than here. I never thought I'd think that.
Penelope raises her eyebrows and her eyes soften. "A-Amelia? Do you wanna hear about her?"
As soon as I hear her name, my heart starts beating faster. My mind flashes with all the most beautiful images of Amelia that I can recall. I can practically see her in front of me. I can almost feel her under my fingertips. I swear I can taste her chapstick on my lips as she kisses me. I rub my fingers together as if I can feel the fabric of her denim skirt. As if I could unbuckle her belt and take her right on my bed right now. I shake the thought from my head. Don't go there, Spencer. Nothing good ever comes of when your mind goes there.
But I can't get her out of my head. I can stop seeing her lying on my lap, peering up at me as she mulls over which record to put on. Etta James or Taylor Swift? That's always the question of the day, isn't it? It always seems to take her hours to decide on an answer, and she usually doesn't. She'll usually work up an appetite with her thoughts, and when she's gone to get a snack or a glass of wine, I decide for her. Always the same. Always Taylor Swift.
But her smile is always so beautiful when she comes back into the room. When the music finally flows through her ears, the smile that comes to her face is one that could end wars, cure cancer, solve world hunger. I didn't think I could ever understand how bubblegum pop music could make a person so happy. I didn’t think I could ever understand how bubblegum pop music could make Amelia want to drag me off the couch or out of bed and force me to dance with her, whether it be in the middle of the night or just as the sun is peeking through the always-open blinds of her apartment.
I squeeze my eyes shut and try to bring myself back to reality. I try to forget about the girl that's waiting for me in the free world. I try to ignore that she's probably shed tear after tear and I haven't been there to wipe them away. My brain produces images of her gasping for air with her head between her knees and I ball my hands into fists.
I'm angry. I'm fucking furious. I want to be there to hold her and whisper in her ear and tell her that her panic attacks are short-lived, that I'm right there. I need to be there to hold her and kiss her and love her. I need her because I can't do this without her. I don't know what to do if I'm not spending my time protecting her. Everything I do is to protect her. I don't know how to function if I'm not holding her hand, or if I'm not pushing myself through every day just so I can call her at midnight to promise that I'm okay. I've become so reliant on Amelia, and maybe that's wrong, but I don't care. I don't care about anything anymore. I just want my life back. I want my life, I want my job, and I want my girlfriend.
I want my girlfriend. I want to move in with her like we planned to and I want to propose to her and I want to marry her. I want to have a whole house full of kids who are loud and messy and loving and adorable and a crusty dog who slobbers all over the couch and chews my shoes. It's not fair. None of this is fair. Amelia doesn't deserve this. She deserves someone better than me.
But I can still see her. I can still see her fucking smile, and I can still hear her goddamn laugh, and I can still feel the fabric of her dumb hair scarves. She's engulfing me in her. She's not even here and yet I feel like I could reach out and she would be in my arms, kissing my neck and telling me that I'm safe and that we can just sit on the balcony and talk. We don't have to go to bed if you don't want to, we can just talk.
What I would give to hear her voice again. I'd give everything I have, and right now, it's not much. I'd give everything plus the clothes on my back to just hear her tell me I'm safe, or to tell me about a new painting she's thinking about starting, or to ask me to tell her a random fact about a food item she is about to buy at the store.
The last thing I want right now is to hear about Amelia. I want it all, or I want nothing. I don't want to hear that Amelia misses me, or that she's crying and having panic attacks in the middle of the BAU, or that she's sleeping in my clothes (or worse, not sleeping at all), or that she's lashing out at everyone. No, if I'm not having her in front of me, kissing me, hugging me, I don't want to hear about her.
"No."
For what seems like the millionth time, Penelope's eyes widen. "No? You don't wanna hear about-"
"No, I don't," there's a pit in my stomach that I try to hold down. I try to not let it take control of me. "I don't wanna hear about how horrible she's doing, okay? So just tell her that I lo-"
I can feel a million eyes burning into every bone in my body and so I stop myself. My lips freeze mid-sentence and I release the steel grip my hands hold around my cuffs. Penelope's are just another pair of eyes that bore into my frame, and I usually love her concerned and mothering nature, but now, it irks me to no end.
"Whatever," it pains me to cut off the sentence I crave so intensely to say, but I can't let my guard down. I can't be vulnerable and I can't show weakness.
"Whatever," Penelope repeats, almost mockingly, her voice cracking. "So you-"
"Could you not say anything to, um," I gulp, "her about this?" I gesture to my face where I can feel the pulsing and throbbing bruises tormenting me. I drop my shoulders and start to fiddle with the way-too-tight handcuffs around my wrists, but then I decide that that's a horrible idea, and probably a good way to get harassed by the correctional officers. "I just don't want her to worry about this. I'm sure she's worried enough. I don't want to give her another reason to, you know, panic."
"Times up! Inmates, get back to your cells."
Without so much as another glance at Penelope, I stand and turn my back to her. I lift my chin as I'm pushed and shoved into the lineup and then pushed and shoved back to my lonely, isolated cell. I'd rather have it this way, behind bars where the other inmates can't get me.
I drop down to the floor, pressing my forehead against the rusty bars, staring out at the drab, bland, boring beige walls. The paint is peeling and the bars, honestly, look like they could be broken with a hard enough kick. And, of course, the colors of the walls do nothing to brighten up the dead environment. The colors aren't anything like those that adorn Amelia's body on the regular.
A frustrated groan escapes my lips as I bang my hand against the bars. Why did I have to think about her again? Why did I have to let her infiltrate my thoughts?
But the colors of her. The colors swirl around in my head but as hard as I try, I can't get her colors to fill this horrible cell I'm confined to. I try to imagine her denim skirts, knit sweaters, and pea coats strewn out on the bed as she chooses what to wear in the morning. I try to remember the feeling of accidentally stepping on one of Amelia's millions of piercings when they fall on the floor after she takes them out before bed. I try to see her laying down on my bed, her sketchbook in her lap, and her colored pencils beside her as she rambles on and on and on, talking more than me, about what she's drawing and how she's planning on achieving her vision.
But no matter how hard I try, I can't get her into the cell with me. She doesn't belong here. Her art doesn't belong on these chipped walls, and her clothes don't belong on this poor excuse for a bed, and her absurdly positive attitude doesn't deserve to be squashed in here.
I rub my eyes and try to forget. I try to forget all about her and I try to erase her from my mind completely. I push myself away from the bars and stand, but standing does the opposite of what I want to do. Standing gives me a perfect view of the tiny window across from my cell, but more specifically, the sky.
I stare up at the clouds, my hands gripping the bars as tight as I possibly can. My eyes well up with tears and my knees start to buckle under my weight, and as my tears start to drip, they sting the cuts that I didn't even realize I had on my face. It’s not like I have a mirror to examine my injuries. 
They are just blobs. There are no dragons, or hands, or tables, or staircases, or cars, or Christmas trees. They're just clouds. There's nothing fancy about them. I'll never be able to see it. I couldn't see shapes when I was with Amelia. What makes me think I would be able to see shapes without her?
I push myself away from the bars and throw myself onto the bed, covering my face with my hands. This is useless. I'm useless. There are echoes of chatter from men on my cell block and it makes my head hurt. If Amelia were here, she would cradle my head in her lap and brush her fingers through my hair, and she would trail her fingertips over my forehead and over the bridge of my nose, all while whispering sweet nothings to me. I groan with frustration, rolling onto my stomach and burying my face under my flat pillow.
"Hey, Reid," Calvin's voice joins the echoes from the cells around mine. "How's it going over there?"
 TAGLIST
@babybloodstonebones @bxnnywriting​ @blameitonthenight21​ @feralreid​ @anepiphany​ @reidscardigan​ @itsmyblogandillreblogifiwantto​ @stxrrywildflower​ @penemily​ @whollytaciturn​ @thegingerfairchild​ @yasminwashere​ @shrimpyblog​ @anamelessfacelessnerd​ @wonderlandhatter​ @whxt-to-write​ @inkandexchange​ @just-call-me-non​
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srhlsx · 5 years
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Rewritten & Reposted March 23, 2021
MASTER | Ch. 7 |CHAPTER 8 | Ch. 9
A few days after your encounter with Bokuto at the corner mart, you were on your way home again from practice. A few girls from your team and a few members of the boy’s team were walking off campus, practices having ended around the same time. 
“Absolutely not, that is completely false!” You laughed, looking at Daiki with a shocked expression as he tried to convince you that what he was saying was correct.
“I swear!” He yelled, looking to one of his teammates for reassurance. “Tell her, Shouta! Fukurodani locker rooms literally have attendants manning them.”  
The teammate he was looking to, Naguri Shouta, looked bored with the conversation but nodded nonetheless as he walked next to you. “Haven’t seen it,” He said, shrugging casually, too cool as he always was. “But wouldn’t be surprised by it though, with their bourgeois lifestyle over there.”
“Fancy words will not win this argument,” You tugged a lock of his styled hair teasingly. “Plus, they are not all that over there just because they are an academy.”
Daiki continued to argue his point, insisting that the rumor he heard was true even though he himself couldn’t confirm it either. Shouta just continued to nod along casually, walking next to you to keep a safe distance from Daiki’s erratic motions, making little side digs at his captain under his breath that made you laugh.
“Proof or it’s not real!” You exclaimed as you all continued to walk through the streets, a few people from the group breaking away to their homes as you went.
“How am I supposed to get proof?” Daiki laughed, then his face lit up like he had the greatest idea in the world. “Hey, text Bokuto and ask him!”
You gasped, agreeing that it was in fact the greatest idea in the world, and pulled out your phone to do just that. You didn’t notice the way the other boy standing with you bristled slightly at the mention of Bokuto’s name, but when you looked up you did notice his expression quickly clear from a furrowed brow to his more typical blank expression. You gave him a closed eye smile while he returned with a half smile of his own.
“Can I walk you the rest of the way?��� You tore your eyes away from the crosswalk sign to look up at Shouta waiting for you to respond.
“Ah, no no!” You waved him off with a grand smile. “It’s so out of the way for you. I will let you guys know what he says!” 
After crossing the street on your own, you waved at Daiki and Shouta as you turned to leave. The two of them went their own direction, Daiki slinging an arm over Shouta’s shoulders and pulling him close to probably tell some kind of joke as they walked.
The further you walked, the less crowded the city around you became. You let your feet move on auto-pilot down the alley, and through the mostly abandoned park. 
New Message: 5:22PM
Bokuto: Yeah right! I wish! You offering??
To clean up after a bunch of gross high school boys? I’d rather run the hill ten times!
Bokuto: No! Just me! Be my lil helper~
Bokuto: we can get u a cute outfit
Bokuto: like a maid cafe!!!!!!!!!!
Bokuto: BUT WITH MY NAME AND NUMBER
Absolutely not.
You rounded on a house, nothing fancy but obviously well taken care of, and took the steps leading up to the front door two at a time. You knocked out a familiar rhythm and waited patiently as a thundering of small feet met your ears from beyond the door.
Greeted by a pair of grey eyes, weathered with age, you crouched down to meet the height of your little sister, Yua, as she politely pushed past the older woman who opened the door to you. She started spewing off about things she had accomplished that day before you could even get a word out to her.
Further into the house, you could see your little brother packing up his school things into his bag. “Baba helped me with history homework today,” He called out as a form of greeting, walking past the old woman to start your short trek home. “She said she was there when it happened.”
“I said I remembered it happening, I wasn’t there Eiji-kun.” The old woman laughed, handing over your little sister’s bag as your two siblings began their descent down the stairs. 
The older woman’s eyes crinkled as she looked up at you, tired but still happy. You appreciated this woman more than you could ever express.
When things began to go downhill with your mom you’d had to move homes to accommodate for the extensive bills that were coming one after another. Your own grandparents lived in different cities, but when one of your grandmother’s friends who lived in Tokyo heard what was going on she sprung into action like it was a second calling for her, even though you’d only met her a handful of times. 
She was adamant about you calling her family, hence Eiji calling her Baba, and would accept nothing but thank-yous and dinner together once a week in exchange for helping your family when you needed it most. Between the time school got out for your siblings and you being able to leave volleyball practice, they would be safe at her home until you were able to collect them - every day.
“Thank you,” You nodded at your elder. “Tomorrow we have a practice match, so I may be a bit late picking them up.”
The woman waved a hand in front of her face absently, brushing off the extra time you had loaded on her suddenly. “No mind,” She said, rubbing your arm comfortingly. “I’ll make sure they have dinner then.”
You gave her hand a tight, but gentle, squeeze and turned to where your siblings had gone. You followed them to the apartment complex just a few houses down. Graffiti littered the lower walls, nothing too obscene but also nothing that was supposed to be there in the first place.
Unlike most apartment buildings, yours did not have any indication of who lived where via buzzer system. All the homes opened up to the outside, marked with floor numbers and unit letters, some were upside down so it could get a little confusing. It wasn’t the most glorious of living arrangements, compared to where your family lived before your mom had gotten sick, but it was home and you would make out of it what you could. 
*
The small, digital clock on your desk let out a soft beep as it shifted over to midnight. You rubbed under your glasses at your eyes, blurring your vision slightly before focusing on the words of the book in front of you again. You had gotten a good amount of work done that night, knowing that tomorrow you’d be home late from your practice match and wouldn’t have nearly as much time to fit in school work after.
New Message: 12:01 AM
Bokuto: You didn’t tell me you had practice match w FA girls tom?
technically today… Slipped my mind! Forgive me!?
Bokuto: w kiss?
shoot your shot!
Bokuto: meet me after!!!! 
Ugh fiiine - twist my arm…
Bokuto: oh hell yeah, gonna walk you home SO hard~
You’re disgusting?? - but curious about how you walk someone home “hard”
Bokuto: involves aggressive chivalry, you’ll see
The following message was an animated sticker of an owl tipping off the top hat he was wearing. You muffled a laugh behind your hand, glancing over your shoulder to make sure your siblings were undisturbed in their bunk beds. Satisfied you hadn’t woken them up, you said your goodnights to Bokuto and locked your phone after making sure you had an alarm set for the morning.
Down the hall, you could hear a set of keys jingle. The door to the apartment opened and shut, if you hadn’t been listening so intently you might not have heard it at all. A deep sigh echoed through the walls and you almost thought about getting up to greet your father as he finally arrived home, but something stopped you. Instead, you silently flipped the switch on your desk lamp and let the darkness flood the room once more.
As you sat motionless at your desk, holding your breath while a shadow passed beneath the door to the bedroom. The figure paused, hesitating a moment - you could imagine your father’s hand hovering at the doorknob, wondering if he should enter to see his children or not. The shadow continued to move, opening the linen closet and rustling around for what you knew were blankets and a spare pillow. 
There’d been many previous nights over the last seven months when you’d woken up to your sister asking for a snack or a drink, and when you’d gone to the kitchen to fetch something for her you’d caught your dad sprawled out on the couch under a makeshift bed of old blankets. At first it made you sad, the thought that your dad couldn’t even sleep in the same bed he once shared with your mother. 
Over the months though, as his work hours grew longer and longer, you started to form a routine of folding up the linens in the morning before your brother and sister could see that their dad was sleeping on the couch.
When the hall light finally turned off, you took that as your opportunity to get up from your desk and finally go to bed. You unclenched your hands, which you hadn’t even realized were in fists tight enough to turn your knuckles white. Since you shared a room with your siblings, you pulled the thin futon out from under their bottom bunk and spread out the blanket you had tucked away within it.
As you pulled your own blankets up to your chin, getting settled into your comfortable nest of warmth, you heard your little sister grumble sleepily. “Neechan?”
“What is it chibi?”
“You haff good dreams ‘kay?”
“You have good dreams too, babygirl.”
*
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esther-ti-designs · 5 years
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Hey everyone, uhh so I have some tea for you all.
So I met this guy (I’ll refer to him as J) during the last meeting of the quarter for the graphic design club last fall.  Here’s everything that happened between December 5 through February 22.
December 5
Honestly, I haven’t noticed J at any of the previous meetings, but that one night, he just came up to me out of the blue and complimented me on my cozy winter gear.
So J and I happened to be taking Intro to Design that quarter and we talked about our group projects for the class, which we just turned in earlier that day (I had just pulled two consecutive all-nighters and had just taken a 3-hour nap prior to the meeting, so I was very sleep deprived at this point).  We continued our conversation while walking down some stairs and outside the building, and he asked me about other clubs that I’m involved in, to which I told him that I’m the secretary and Head of Hufflepuff for the Harry Potter Alliance (HPA) and that I’m also in the ballroom dance club.  He seemed very interested in HPA.  He mentioned that he played second violin in the video game orchestra (VGO) and that they were having a quarterly concert that weekend.  A friend in HPA had promoed the VGO concert the night before, but I wasn’t really interested, as I had no knowledge of video game music.  J and I exchanged Instagram handles and later that night, I answered all of his questions about HPA.  Then on Sunday, sort of at the last minute, I found out that a few friends from HPA were going to the VGO concert and I went along because $5 for a concert is not bad, and I haven’t been to an orchestra performance in a while.  The concert was so much better than I expected!
December 9
Finals week just started and J randomly asked if I was studying on campus 👀
December 11
We met up at a boba shop near my apartment to study for the Intro to Design final (it was raining pretty hard and J refused to have me bike out to campus in the rain).  We studied off a Quizlet set for about 3 hours until my laptop’s battery was running low, and then we talked for another couple hours!  It turns out we have a lot in common!  We’re both only children, 22 years old, left-handed, design majors (J is actually a design and managerial economics double major), and we play the violin (I used to play violin and cello, but I digress).  Oh and we both have an iNTeResTinG injury story haha.  Then, before we went our separate ways, he gave me a one-armed hug, which I couldn’t reciprocate because I had my arms full with a cup of boba and my umbrella.
December 12
J DM’ed me out of the blue asking for my Spotify wrapped up.  I normally don’t give in to trends easily, and this was something I wasn’t really interested in sharing with the entire world, but I shared it with him anyways (Spoiler: It’s mostly Game of Thrones soundtracks, Taylor Swift, and BTS).  Despite being an orchestra nerd, I find it really difficult keeping up with popular music, and my musical taste stays fairly consistent even several years later.  I was kind of expecting him to laugh at my musical taste, but he actually complimented me for liking dramatic tv/film soundtracks.  And then we arranged another study session right before the design final.
December 13
The Intro to Design final was supposed to be 50 questions, all multiple-choice, no trick questions.  It was supposed to be really easy, and I thought we got almost everything down at the previous study session.  So why were we having another study session right before the exam?  I thought either he really wanted an A in the class, or he wanted to see me again before we went on winter break.  Right before going in for the exam, he asked if I wanted to meet up again for a “post-final celebration” when we were done with the exam.  Okay, now I was really starting to think he wanted to spend some more time with me before winter break 👀
So after the design final, we walked down to one of two boba shops on the edge of campus and downtown.  We both ordered our drinks, he got some popcorn chicken, and we talked for four hours!  I can’t remember everything we talked about, but time really flew by.  And then, before we went home, he gave me a one-armed hug again.
December 14
I had plans to fly home to LA today.  I had spent the previous night cleaning my apartment and packing stuff (I managed to forget to bring a pair of sneakers because, for some reason, dumbass me decided to wear heeled boots to the airport because ~fashion~).  I was sitting in the airport, about to board the plane, when I got a message from J.  He remembered that I was flying that day and was asking if I got home safely.  Aww he actually cares.  I told him that I would be boarding soon and will be offline for the next couple hours.  And then I updated him when I got off the plane, when my parents picked me up at LAX, while we sat in the typical LA traffic, until we all made it home.
December 15 - January 5
Over the next few weeks of winter break, we messaged each other a couple times every day.  We shared pictures of the holiday decorations in our home, and I shared pictures and video clips of my pet bunny too.  On Chistmas Eve, he asked if I had any plans, to which I told him we were going out for dinner to celebrate my mom’s birthday.  He wished my mom happy birthday and I passed the birthday wishes to my mom. “Hey mom, my friend says happy birthday.” “Thank you — who???” And I had to tell my mom about J (whoops).  Her judgmental ass was not exactly happy to hear that J is a Caucasian dude from yeehaw country, and after showing her J’s Instagram feed, she was not a fan of his art style smh.  Anyways, the day I was coming back to Davis, J was like AHHHH you’re back!!!!!!!  Just pure excitement 💖
January 9 - 16
We met up at yet another boba shop after the first week of classes.  Our meeting was shorter than all our previous meetings, because I had to bike back to give an apartment tour later that afternoon.  Two weeks into the winter quarter, we met after our design studio classes and walked to an HPA meeting together.  We also went to a graphic design club meeting together, after which he offered to drive me home so that I wouldn’t have to bike with the cold wind on my face.  I trusted J at this point, so I gratefully accepted.  I think my trust in him went up at least 10 times in this moment, because J managed to secure my small and heavy bike to the bike rack on the back of his car, which already had his bike strapped in.  After dropping me off at my apartment, he invited me out for dinner that weekend (it was also MLK weekend).
January 18
J picked me up at 7.  The restaurant he chose was hella ~ f a n c y ~.  It was an Italian restaurant downtown with dim lighting and pasta priced at $13 - $16.  He said he didn’t know the place would be that fancy and that he trusted Yelp’s description of “casual Italian.”  I told a friend about our sort-of-date night and she thinks J picked a date-y restaurant on purpose 👀  Oh and my mom went the extra mile of writing down J’s name, the place we were going to, and I was to call home at 10 PM (I ended up getting back and called an hour early).
February 14 - Valentine’s Day ❤️
Unfortunately, J never came to another HPA meeting because the campus radio station, KDVS, holds meetings at the same time, and he’s trying to get a job with them.  And we don’t really see each other very often because design classes are usually 3-hours long and J is really busy with 5 classes.  But J has been super excited about Yule Ball ever since he met me.  J came over while I was tabling for ticket sales.  He mentioned that VGO was going to see Sonic that night, and invited me to hang with VGO.  Let me tell you, it was quite an experience and definitely not the typical Valentine’s Day date.
We pulled into a Sonic drive-in for dinner (because gotta get in that Sonic mood lol).  A girl introduced herself as D (name altered to protect identity, of course).  She clearly has some sort of leadership role in the group because everyone pays attention to her, but she constantly makes jokes about being everyone’s daddy.  The jokes are so vulgar and obscene.  It was like weirdest video game nerd and band kid hybrid (J later tells me she’s a violinist.  What?!  Orchestra people are usually super chill lol).  After dinner, we get in our cars and head down the street to the movie theater.  The VGO had reserved seats in Row J.  J and I had just booked our tickets several hours earlier and we were in Row F.  Throughout the movie, someone in the theater yelled at every pivotal moment (including, yes, that Tails reveal in the post credits).  J thoroughly enjoyed the movie and laughed along with whomever was yelling behind us, while I knew absolutely nothing going into it, except that Sonic is a blue hedgehog that can run super fast.  J also gave one additional bit of info before the movie: Sonic really likes chili corn dogs for some strange reason???
So that’s how my Valentine’s Day went lol
February 18
J came by around 3 in the afternoon, right before we were going to pack up for the day, and purchased a Yule Ball ticket.  He’s obviously very excited to go to Yule Ball with me but he says he doesn’t know how to dance.  I told him we have a waltz lesson planned.  He’s like aww and says he wants me to personally teach him (my heart 💕).  And as always, he gave me a hug before leaving to go to class.  Recently, I noticed that J has been giving full hugs instead of his usual one-armed hugs, though it depends on the situation.
February 22
✨❄️ Y u l e   B a l l ❄️✨
J and I arrived separately at Yule Ball because I had to help set up the venue for the event and I had spent the entire day working on an Azkaban wanted poster prop and literally finished it two hours before our meeting time for setting up the venue.  The dance was supposed to start at 7 PM and J got there early enough to help me out with last-minute decorations.  I had signed up to be in charge of the photobooth from 7 to 7:30, but no one came for pictures during that 30-minute period, so I was free for the rest of the night.  J and I had a fantastic time admiring the detailwork in the decorations around the venue and laughing and dancing to the weird selection of 2000s music.  J did pretty okay with learning waltz basics and I gave him tips here and there on standing in closed frame, balance, the slight tension in the left hand, etc.
Sometime towards the end of the night, my ballroom friend pulled me aside for a bathroom chat and asked if we’re dating.  I don’t know???  We haven’t decided to call it official so ??
After helping clean up everything at the end of the night, J dropped off a friend and right before turning to drop me off (I live across the street from that friend), he remembered that I hadn’t had actual food all day prior to Yule Ball (aww he actually cares, and he probably wanted some extra time with me even though my apartment was right there).  So we went downtown for (a very late) dinner.  While we chatted over food and boba, our conversation drifted towards soundtrack music and I mentioned The Theory of Everything soundtrack, my favorite soundtrack besides Game of Thrones.  J immediately searched up The Theory of Everything soundtrack album and streamed it on the way home (that’s some serious dedication right there), and he liked it!
Oh and I forgot to mention that J forgot to bring a jacket and I had a very warm scarf and coat, so we held onto each other with a one-armed hug while we walked to his car.  I really love his hugs, one-armed or full hugs.
I usually post a picture from Yule Ball every year so here’s this year’s!  Yep, that’s J.  And we’re both Ravenclaws :)
I’ll end this post here, so I don’t end up with a romance novel in a single post lol
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odilestory · 6 years
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untitled jay x reader fic pt.1 (jason todd x reader)
This is so long oml. but i’ve had this idea for a whole minute so i thought i’d better put it down. anyway, enjoy!
---
Legs and arms crossed, you sat slumped in a cold metal chair outside your favorite coffee shop. You pushed down your sunglasses (Versace, another gift) and peered over the brims at the jumbotron in the middle of the square. A news headline.
Will Gotham’s symbol of hope and empowerment ever return? - 5 years pass since the last appearance of the beloved Nightingale - 
You push your glasses back up just in time to miss the photo shown. The last photo of you two - though, of course, no one would ever know it was you two - that was ever taken. 
Five years ago, a bystander snapped a picture of Nightingale and Robin leaning towards one another, about to have their first kiss. That photo had become iconic. There were so many theories about what happened to each of you: the young couple ran from Batman to get hitched, or you were undercover and you killed Robin and then yourself. The second one hurt.
Regardless of the picture shown, you clear your throat, take another sip of coffee and stand up to begin the walk back to your apartment where you’ll inevitably spend the rest of the day.
A few heads turn as you walk down the street. Some women are jealous of your bag (Balenciaga) or your new shoes (classic black Louboutins with the red sole). It was a hard choice today between the Louboutins and the Ralph & Russo Edens, but the black pumps were a better match with your Louis Vuitton Belted Trapeze coat and High Waisted Loos Pant. It was a no-brainer.
The only stop you made was to glance at the news again. A report about Batman and company. You walked away, rolling your eyes, as you knew that Gotham’s “heroes” weren't what they always seem. They would know if they’d been where you’d been.
---
The clean, white apartment often seemed too perfect. You didn’t deserve it, but Bruce insisted that he buy you a place to stay. After Jay’s death, living at or even visiting the manor was too much, and after your parents died (not even six months after Jason passed), you had nowhere to go. Bruce gave you a place to go because he didn’t know how else to say sorry. Sorry for killing your boyfriend. Sorry for killing your drive. For killing the one you loved.
Your cell phone rang. You felt no immediate emotion as you knew it was Dick calling to check in. He’s the only one that ever calls anyway.
- Hello?
- Hey baby-gale, how are you?
- How do you think?
- Have you been out yet today? Socialize at all?
- I got coffee. Like I do every morning. You don’t need to keep checking in. Unless there’s something you need to let me know about, you don’t need to call me every day. I can survive.
- I apologize for caring? Come on, (Y/N), we miss you. It hasn’t been the same. Hell, you don’t even know Tim or Damian yet. And when was the last time you actually went out? You’re 20 years old. At least go to a club or something. I know you can afford something right off the runway so why not wear it out? 
- I went two years ago, to the club down the street. But it was like... ugh. I watched people dance and I wanted it to be us. It was torture. Like I kept hearing his voice... I don’t want to do that to myself. 
- Try again. For me? How’bout you go out with me and Barbara. If it's too much, we’ll all leave, no problem. Your check should be at your place today. Go spend it on something to wear, we’ll meet you at Mother’s at 10.
You didn’t respond, not wanting to admit defeat. You sighed and hung up the phone, but you knew that Dick knew you would be there. 
In the meantime, you made lunch and checked your current account balance. You had $28,743.92 in your savings. It was more than enough to buy a nice look for tonight, but you wanted to wait.
Another thing Bruce did to “accommodate you” was he would send you a quarterly check of $50,000. Every three months you would receive a plain check, directly from the man himself, along with a note from him. Every note had been a plea to return. Apparently, your old suit was displayed right next to Jason’s, as if you were dead as well.
You heard the mail fall through the slot in your door and quickly sorted through the magazines, coupons, and bills to find the envelope that mattered. Sure enough, there it was. You tore it open, threw the note aside. You’d read it later. 
There it was: $50,000 from the man himself sitting in your freshly manicured fingers. You ran a nude, glossy, almond-shaped nail over the writing as you put the check down and exchanged it for the note. You unfolded the card.
(Y/N),
We’re here if you need us. Just call. For anything.
We grieve too.
B. Wayne
You folded it back up and slid it across your counter, once again grabbing the check and throwing it in a different Balenciaga bag, putting back on the Louboutins, and headed down to the bank.
---
“Well look at you!”
“Miss ‘hasn’t left the house in 5 years’ really cleans up! What is that, Valentino?”
Dick and Barbara stared at you in awe. You picked out the Michael Kors Sequined Mesh Bell-Bottom Gold Jumpsuit just because you knew it was Mother’s.
“It’s Michael Kors. Did you get us on the list?” 
Mother’s was the weirdest club you had perhaps ever stepped foot in, but it was Dick’s favorite. The club was basically straight out of the 70′s and 80′s. They only played music from those decades, and they even had a disco ball out at all times. It was cramped, but busy every night. They had great food and even better drinks, and even though you weren’t 21 you knew you could get Dick to buy a few for you.
“Of course. Come on, let's have some fun.” 
Barbara clutched Dick’s arm and you fiddled with you cobalt blue Balenciaga clutch as your heels clicked towards the bouncer.
“Name?” A large, burly man dressed nicely in a navy blue suit held a clipboard on one hand and in the other the clasp of the red rope, ready to let us through if we were eligible.
“Grayson. These two are with me.” He flashed his classic smile and motioned to you and Babs, receiving a welcoming smile in return.
“Enjoy your night.” He unhooked the rope and as you pushed through the door, you were met with colorful, flashing lights, people yelling and dancing, and very loud Duran Duran. Maybe this will be fun.
Swerving around other excited and tipsy club-goers, you all found a booth right off the dance floor and set your stuff down there. 
“We’re gonna go to the bar, want anything?” Barbara leaned close to you so you could hear over the loud music.
“Something poisonous! I’ll wait here.” You smiled and leaned on the table, flicking the sequins on your pants and shifting weight between your heels and the balls of your feet.
“We’ll be right back!” They walked away, again arm in arm. That could be you and him right now, if only he were still here.
(at the bar)
“There he is.” Dick got Barbara’s attention as he sighted the taller man sitting at the end of the bar politely declining inquiries for his number.
“Dick, are you sure this is gonna work? She doesn’t have a clue, what if it just scares her away? Pushes her further into that darkness?” She grabbed his arm, making him face her. For the first time since they came up with this plan, he was doubtful. “Dick, is he ready? You all just made up. He just healed things with Bruce. Are you sure he doesn’t need a break before he tries something like this?”
“They loved each other. They love each other. Still. Nothing is gonna change that. I have a feeling its now or never. Any longer and I think she might try and be with him the only way she thinks is possible. I don’t want her to go that far. I’m not gonna let her do what she says she wants to. I’m not gonna let her die when he’s alive. This is happening. Now or never.”
She nodded. Both were determined now. Dick waved his hand to grab his attention.
“Jason!” He looked up with relief and excused himself from the current flirt session he had been roped into. He hopped off the bar stool, leaving his drink and strode towards Dick rather hurriedly.
“Dick, I gotta be honest, I’m not sure about this, you sure she’s not gonna freak?”
“Oh, she’s gonna freak,” Barbara laughed, “But its now or never.” The couple said at the same time.
“We’re gonna bring her a drink, wait a minute or two, and we’ll get her to come dance. Ask her to dance. The music is so loud no one is gonna notice if you explain the whole coming back to life thing, so don’t worry. Explain if you have to.” Dick hurriedly motioned his plan with his hands as if it was an actual mission, and truthfully it was because he had Tim and some other “extras” scattered about in case anything went wrong, in fact, even the bouncer was in on it. Dick told him he was trying to get his two friends to make up and to not let you leave.
“Whatever you say birdbrain, but if this ruins everything, I will literally kill you.”
You had been pulled out onto the crowded, sweaty dancefloor, and were dancing with Dick while Babs was in the bathroom (she wasn’t actually in the bathroom; she was hyping up Jason, but you didn’t know that, of course).
The song stopped and you were in a happy laughing fit: you were having lots more fun than you thought you would. The next song started, it was a song that you, Dick, and Jason would all dance around to and mockingly sing along to. It was Lovemaker by Wham (not George Michael’s Wham!, the other one).
You started dancing with Dick again, making stupid faces and joking about when you were younger. He glanced behind you but quickly brought his eyes back to you again.
“What is it?”
“Nothing, I thought I saw Babs.”
You were about to respond with a quick “ok” when someone tapped you on the shoulder.
“Hey, doll.”
You froze and looked at Dick for a second, who, instead of recognizing your discomfort, smiled at you. So you turned around, ready to correct the mistake in word choice this stranger had made.
“Sorry, I -”
To your complete surprise, you were met with a strangely familiar face.
“Wanna dance?” Very out of character for Jay, he stuttered a bit, barely speaking loud enough for you to hear.
“Wh-Jay? N-no...No! What the fuck!? You died! What the hell? What the fuck
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sunnysidewrites · 7 years
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Flower Boy!Jeonghan
Requested by anon: Flower boy Jeonghan!!  
HEY HEY HEY GUESS WHO FINALLY PICKED UP THE SLACK AND WROTE THIS AFTER AN ENTIRE WEEK OF PROMISING TO :))) I’m so sorry yall this was supposed to be part of Jeonghan’s bday present but rip!!! THANKS TO @kakaotaeks FOR HELPING ME OUT WITH THIS!! who knows where this would be if i didn’t use the flower boy cafe au yIKES!! happy belated bday my angel + devil!! happy reading my children!!!
warnings: i still have 1 last super angsty piece for jeonghan, so i tried to make this p fluffy :))) and who knows when i’ll even finish that piece so :))) hang on tight to this fluff while you can! and also jeonghan is a cheesy goofball who’s bad at literature
This was originally gonna be Florist!Jeonghan but thank the heavens y’all don’t have to read the lame idea I had before elena came up w this
Shoutout to my b!!!
BASED ON OURAN KISS KISS FALL IN LUV
tHIS IS SO CUTE OK OK LETS GET 2 WORK
You’re in your usual literature class lecture hall and you’re sitting a few rows behind,,,,
The one and only, Yoon Jeonghan
Campus heartthrob
With looks like that though??? Can scREW ME UP
You’re staring at the back of his fluffy blonde locks as he studiously scribbles down his notes in his beaten torn notebook
Every time you try to refocus on the professor, your eyes just drift back to his short hair that looks a little too tempting to run your fingers through
By the time you prep yourself to focus on taking notes for the twentieth time that hour, everyone is packing their things and you’re like n OO OO NOT AGAIN
“Let me guess: Jeonghan?” Your friend nonchalantly brings up as they’re stuffing their folder in their bag
You sigh and get up to pack your things along
“I don’t even know why he’s so distracting… just something about him”
They’re shaking their head and smile knowingly bc it’s just so damn oBV I O US WHY
“You know that hot cafe that just opened everyone’s been raving about?”
“The Diamond? What about it?”
They smile even wider and are like, “do you know who got a job as a cute waiter?”
“,,,,,,,,,,,,What are you trying to say”
“Maybe you can finally get that number you’re always babbling about?”
And you’re like oh my god pl S STop but you’re right tho :/
You finally have some time off from your schedule to swing by the cafe down a few blocks from your dorm
You’re out on a lovely Saturday morning stroll and the strong scent of coffee beans wafts out into the streets
The cafe has only been open for an hour but there’s already a huge line
And if it weren’t for your curiosity, you would have just been like Gotta Go Fast
But you figured you would do yourself a favor and begrudgingly hold it out in the line that extends to almost the end of the street
Think of this as a cafe version of Ouran!!
Except add 7 more (excluding haruhi bc you take the protagonist’s place)
The cafe is so full that it makes you wait for the servers to take you to a table like in restaurants so it’s THAT big
No matter what time of day it is, it’s always co m ple te l y paCKED
8am when it just opens? Looks like a concert venue
Half an hour until closing time? All the tables are entirely occupied
It’s predominantly females but evEN GUYS SWOON i mean who wouldn’t tho???? When you have 13 pieces of f I N E????
Anyways when you finally reach the front of the line after 38 years, you’re like finALLY MY LEGS :((
And the bubbly little host is dressed in actual 5-star restaurant attire and he’s looking back at you like :DDDDD!!!!!!!!!! And you’re like :ooooo!!!!! :DDDDD!!!! What a cutie pie!!!!!!!
“Hello, and welcome to The Diamond! I’m Chan, your host, and I’ll be your go-to if your main server is unavailable! We’re currently waiting for a table to open up, so please be patient!” he perfectly recites and you’re just like clutching your heart bc of hoW CUTE HE IS!!!
Around 10 minutes pass and he’s notified that a table has been opened and you’re like okay,,,, this is it. This is where My Life Changes
He leads you to a cute little corner that gives you a nice little window view of the bustling streets
He gives you a menu once you’re seated and he’s like, “Okay, this is where I take off!!! Your main server will be with you shortly! If you need anything, just tap on this little bell!”
As he scurries away you’re just like :(((( why can’t you be my waiter flfjdldfskj wait I’m here for Jeonghan!!
You’re browsing through the menu and you’re appreciating all the aesthetics from the tableware to the graphics on the menu
You hear how the other waiters interact with their supporters customers as you’re waiting for yours and you could have sworn you heard Jeonghan’s name floating around
“What’s the special for today?”
“It’s the double chocolate cheesecake, honey~~”
*SCREAMS* me 2
His favorite pet name to call his supporters customers is “honey” uM IM WEAK B YE
And people seem to be ordering devil’s food cake a lot what a coincidence lmAO
A few minutes pass and you feel a presence nearing you and you casually brush it off as just a waiter passing by but oh boy!!!
“Hi honey~ What can I get you for today -- wait, Y/N?”
You’re about to chOKE ON YOUR SPIT
You look up from the desserts page and see the face that you’ve been mustering up the courage to talk to for months
“J-Jeonghan! I didn’t know you worked here!” the classic sentence starter
He lets out a small laugh in disbelief and you’re like aaaAAAA SO CUTE ST O P I T THIS IS NOT GOOD FOR MY HEART
“I haven’t seen you around here before. Is this your first time today?”
And you’re lowkey highkey blushing bc he,,,, noticed you?????
“Yeah,,,, it is,,,,,,, what do you recommend?”
He hums in thought and turns back to you, “We have the Devil’s food cake that seems to be really popular whenever I serve customers for some reason,” he chuckles and he grins that angelic yet mischievous smile
And you’re like huh :))) I :))) wonder :))) why :)))
You tell him you’ll try it out with a latte and give him the menu as he elegantly exits and leaves your heart painfully wanting to leap out of your chest
Some time passes and you’re taking in the decor and the view of the streets when he returns promptly with your food and drink
“Here you go, Y/N :)” he smiles and gently places the plates down in front of you
But honestly all you’re focusing on is how clOSE his face is when he did that
Do you imagine him to smell really nice?? Bc he probably smells like clean laundry and just fRESH AND SOFT AND--
Ahem
Little did you know his little fleeting glances at you to check your reaction of the mouthwatering sights in front of you!!!
Am i talking about the food or am I talking about Jeonghan always looking like a meal???? Guess we’ll never know
He nervously giggles and runs his fingers through his hair and you can’t help but to eye his movements bc,,,, those luscious locks,,,,
He’s like well!!! Try it!!! And you’re like ughsldgkdglh in front of you??? Right now????
He doesn’t seem to be budging anytime soon so you’re like rip ok guess so
You take your first bite and your eyes are about to bulge out of your sockets bc how in the name of the heavens can chocolate cake bE SO!!!!!!! GOOD!!!!!!! (spoiler alert: it is)
You’re looking back at him with widened eyes and a chocolate caked mouth as you’re mumbling,” ish sho gud!!”
And he’s like lmAO YOU’RE SO CUTE-- I mean,, yes,,, yes it is
And he gestures at your mouth and says “you have a little something uh,,,, everywhere LOL” and you’re like lsdjdfljd oh god i wanna dig up a hole and bury myself forever!!! And you hastily grab the napkin and wipe the chocolate crumbs off
And you two are so off in your own little world that both of you fail to notice the attention the other customers are directing towards you
Because Jeonghan nEVER, and I mean NE V ER, acts that naturally to a customer
It’s all a bunch of his favorite pet name, “honey,” and some winking tossed in his light flirting
But laughing? Having a really good time? Acting like friends? Joking? Not once!!!
And everyone is like Who Are You And Tell Me Your Secrets
He strikes up a conversation with you so easily and you’re so taken aback bc why would he be talking to an invisible soul like yours??? What’s happening with the world???
“Did you ever get the project turned in?”
And you’re really confused like,,,,, yes??? What???
And he sheepishly smiles, his ears a little red iM YODELING
“I just,,, overheard you worry about how much your partner was slacking off when you were talking to your friend that day,,,, that really sucks :(“
And you’re just like o H!!! Omg
“It’s all taken care of, don’t worry!!! At least i hope so,” you mutter
And you can feel his hesitance and you’re like ???? what is it??
“Maybe you need a new partner for a change? Our professor mentioned our next project can have us choose our own partners,,,, and you seem to be really good at this class,,,,,”
And you wanna laUGH bc you’re literally just there to stare at the back of his head
But he’s like you always know the answers whenever she calls on you????
“It doesn’t take a genius to know what the types of irony are, Jeonghan”
“hEY IM TRYING MY BEST THAT’S WHAT MY NOTES ARE FOR”
And you’re like,,,, do you need a tutor???
He lights up and his cheeks are stained a light pink aND IM CRYING IN THE CLUB
“yES! I mean, yes. Yes. Please. Here, I’ll give you my number”
What you feel: IM SCREAMING INTO THE ABYSS AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I JUST GOT YOON JEONGHAN’S NUMBER, AN ACTUAL ANGEL!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What you say: Oh, sure!
You both do a number exchange and literally everyone in that cafe is just on the floor like hOW DID YOU????? WH A T????
And Chan calls him and he not-so-subtly hints about how he’s been talking to you for way too long and everyone in line is complaining LOL
He regretfully looks at you and you nod sadly in understanding
“I’ll catch you later this week,” you say and he’s about to turn around when he stops and turns back
“Are we meeting for a study da-- sESSION?”
And you’re like what did you say--
“I said study session”
“.....I’m free Saturday”
“I’ll meet you at the library,” he gives you one last grin before winking and walking away and you’re like eXCUSE ME WHAT DOES THAT MEAN SIR
You shake your head but you can’t suppress the gigantic smile that your lips involuntarily make
You take the mug in your hands and you notice the latte art is a picture of a heart
You’re like scREAMING BC ITS SO CHEESY BUT YOU LIKE IT
And now you finally have a reason to pay attention in your literature class if you gotta tutor a potential college bf in your study da--session!!!!
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aoibaratraveler · 4 years
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A Look Back At My Time in Japan! Chapter 5
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Fourth and Final Month on Exchange: July
This was a month full of social events both fun and bittersweet!
I started off the month by watching a movie with some of my uni friends. I have no idea what movie we watched but I’m sure it was a good time. The next couple of weeks consisted of mostly dance practice for the pier side festival that was to be taking place at the end of the month in Nagasaki. I joined the JASIN dance team since they were short on members and I thought it would be cool (plus we got a free university shirt for participating), but man was it difficult. JASIN was the international program that brought in exchange students from around the world to Nagasaki University of Foreign Studies and every year they apparently recruit exchange students to represent the school in a dance in the opening ceremony/party on the first day of the festival. I think there were about three or four other universities there. I actually have footage from the event thanks to one of my pals who was an intern at NHK since they televised it (I think I’ve been on NHK in some way, shape, or form at least two or three times but that was the only time that I was able to actually get the footage since I rarely had access to a TV in Japan during my travels *sighs*). Another girl from my exchange group who was super good at dancing and just had great coordination offered to give me some dance tutoring every day after class when I didn’t have work leading up to the event since I’m just born clumsy so it took awhile for me to get the hang of it.
By around the 16th of the month, pretty much all of Japan went crazy; especially my university. Why may you ask? Because Pokemon Go was released in Japan. While North America had access to the game, Japan was a couple of weeks behind so when it was finally released on Japanese servers it just blew up. Seriously, you couldn’t pass a person on the street without seeing them playing the game. It was great. Even R, one of my university buds who didn’t seem too into anime or gaming, downloaded the game before me and was playing. We pretty much spent everyday thereafter playing together, catching Pokemon and trying to compete in levelling up. She, Corn (a nickname for one of our guy friends) and I decided that we would all be team Mystic since everyone else seemed to be Instinct. Honestly, even the teachers joined in on the excitement. I stupidly didn’t invest in a data sim card or portable WiFi during my time in Japan so I was limited to public WiFi when playing but there was enough of it to go around in the city, it was just harder in the suburbs or more rural areas to play. It’s a shame though because while I still play, most of the people that I started playing with have lost interest in the game but I have decided to stay team Mystic even though the bf is team Valor just to hold onto the memory of that Summer. It was a great bonding experience although I did annoy at least one of my friends with my constant playing who never saw the fun in it.
I also spent a lot of my days that month going out after work with my coworkers. It was just a super lively month in general; B introduced me to a small, but delicious local Korean place and there was an izakaya outing almost every other night with my uni friends. I don’t drink but I still enjoy the atmosphere of everyone being silly and just having a good time - plus the food at izakaya joints is always delicious. It was also the birthday of the crazy receptionist that month, M, and while I may not have been on the best terms with her, she was still friendly with B who is friends with me so I still got an invite. We went to a manga cafe/karaoke joint and it was just quite the time. We somehow managed to stay out until 5 am.
Some days after, B and I went on a hike up to Inasayama from the centre of the city. We were able to open up to each other a lot during this walk and just talked for ages. I hadn’t been hiking in a long while and even though I was cycling or walking to university everyday...I seemed to be a bit out of shape for the hike...Once we left the centre of the city and were hiking more rural routes I really felt it whereas B had been used to inclines like this since she lived at the top of a small mountain and had to walk a huge staircase everyday to get home so it was a piece of cake for her. This also took place on a gorgeous day in the sweltering heat and humidity and I seemed to have forgotten to pack water so it was tough, not gonna lie. I also had stopped wearing the hiking boots that I bought specifically for Japan after my trip to Taiwan since it was just a bad purchase, my feet could never breathe and were a sweaty mess after a day of wearing them...sorry TMI! So I was always spending my days, whether hiking or not, in my sandals that I bought in Taiwan. Not the smartest idea, but hey, at least I got a cool sandal tan (xD). Fortunately for me though, with regards to dehydration, Japan has the most vending machines of any country, about 1 for every 23 citizens and each one has water as well as many delicious and sometimes seasonal drinks so I was covered for refreshments. You can literally find these machines in the middle of nowhere and the most random of places. We were taking side streets up residential areas and we still found a couple. By the time we got close to the top of the mountain it all felt worth it. It was so beautiful, with spectacular views and we managed to catch such a nice breeze. I wish I could still go on hikes like that one with B. It feels so nostalgic to think about that day.
I think I mentioned back in chapter one or two that my home stay family unfortunately did not turn out to be so great even though in the beginning they seemed awesome; so I’m going to take a little break from my recollection of July to explain why that was since July was to be the last month that I would stay with them and I might as well get that out of the way. In the beginning, they really made me feel comfortable and happy and it’s a shame it turned out the way it did because I really wanted to have a second family in Japan through them. They didn’t by any means break my exchange experience but it is a slight unfortunate side to my time there. Before I met my home stay mother who was late picking me up on the first of April, my university informed me of how lucky I was to be staying with this family. This was primarily because their house was in the centre of Nagasaki city and close to everything I could need. I wouldn’t have minded at all being in the pure countryside though but oh well. They also said this because apparently my home stay family were veterans in hosting people but had taken a two year break from doing it and I was the first person that they had decided to take on in a while. (I later found out that it was because their last home stay student was this big smelly guy who just never left his room and seemed to watch anime all day, every day. My home stay family often compared me to him and said I was much better while basically bad mouthing him.). I think that after a month of living with my home stay family the novelty must have worn off which is strange that I would have been a novelty to them since they were so used to hosting foreigners but it truly felt like that. All of April was great and they really showed me a great time. From May onward, however, their attitude towards me just dropped. I tried to be as respectful as I could to them and never take advantage of their kindness or ask too much of them so I really don’t know what happened. They just became very neglectful and apathetic towards me. My theory is that even though my home stay mother was a stay at home mother she just had too much on her plate. She was very sociable and if she wasn’t tending to her high school aged daughter’s or junior high school aged son’s needs then she was taking part in some kind of event. Not that I think it should be her job to clean it but their house was always filthy so clearly she didn’t care about that either. Which meant she was outside of the house a lot of the time and wasn’t cooking or cleaning and which would result in the father having to cook, usually just enough for himself and his son. Essentially, if the mother wasn’t home then I wouldn’t get breakfast or dinner--which is what I paid for as part of my home stay package (and it was quite the expensive package). 
To be honest it felt like they were becoming quite stingy with me which didn’t make sense because I saved them a lot of money. I often went out with my friends and would always let them know when I was going out and didn’t need dinner and then in Ramadan when I spent the month fasting I never needed breakfast so they didn’t need to cook for an extra person for a long time. Regardless, there was one time when they all decided to go out for dinner for a special occasion and said I was allowed to come but had to pay for my portion. So either come out and pay for dinner with them or get no dinner at home and have to buy dinner anyway. It’s not like I was expecting them to pay for me but come on, I paid so much to live with them and they were saving so much money as it is but then were even having me pay for dinner with them? I guess I’m still a little bitter. On some days when it rained or when I didn’t have any plans, which was somewhat rare, they even seemed bothered by the idea that I might want to spend the whole day in the house and would ask if I was planning to go out at all. I went from really trying to be close with them and getting them to like me to just keeping to myself after a while. My little home stay brother who was in junior high didn’t seem to get the memo about being cold to me because in the end he was my only friend in the house and we would often play card games together. Don’t get me wrong though, I did try to at least communicate the food issue with my home stay mother but she acted like she had no idea what I was talking about and that the times that I didn’t get any dinner was because they didn’t know that I was in the house (???). A complete lie because I always informed them when I planned to be outside the house through text (always in Japanese) and when I didn’t say anything then that meant that I was planning to be home for dinner; besides she also never asked or made sure if I was planning to be out. 
Throughout July as well, my home stay mother was also just never around when I needed help with preparing to leave in August or would just make up an excuse and say she needed to do something when I needed her help. You see, I was planning to start backpacking around Japan come August and needed to sort out how to get my suitcase from Nagasaki to Tokyo and what to do with all of the things that I wasn’t planning to take with me i.e. donate or recycle. I had done some research on the best method to get my suitcase sent back to Tokyo without incurring any extra costs. When I sent my suitcase to Nagasaki from Tokyo in March it had a place to go to but since I would be backpacking and didn’t really have a place waiting for me at that point in Tokyo I couldn’t just send my suitcase all the way to Tokyo with nowhere to go but I had found out I could send it to a major post office, for example, Osaka city post office, and they would hold it for ten days free of charge before sending it back to where it came from and then I could just send it again to Tokyo from Osaka when I was to arrive in Osaka. It did need a lot of explanation to the post office staff on what I was planning to do and my suitcase was heavy enough already so I had to get rid of a bunch of stuff. This is where I thought my home stay mother would help me. First of all, the Nagasaki city post office was a bit far to be lugging around the suitcase from their apartment so I thought she could drive me there, help me donate some of my stuff and help to explain my plan to the post office staff. Alas, she wasn’t around to help with any of that and I had to figure it all out on my own. Anyway I’m getting a bit ahead of myself because that didn’t actually happen until the beginning of August but I wanted to paint a picture of what my home stay family was like before I mention them again later.
The end of July was super jam packed. On the 27th, I had my last day at the English school that I was working at and it felt like my time there had gone by so fast. My boss made it clear to me how much he wanted me to come back and work for him when I was to graduate. Working for him was quite the experience and I definitely learned a lot about myself as a teacher and about teaching and realised that I really enjoyed it which is why I decided from that point that I was going to work toward applying for the JET programme, but that’s a story for another time. My last shift was really sweet because I had bonded with a bunch of my students so each group of students from the various classes that I taught made me a little farewell card that I still have. I was really sad to be going but looking forward to possibly teaching in Japan again at some point in my future. 
The next day was the “graduation/farewell” ceremony for all of the exchange students at my university who were planning to leave. This was also sad but also so much fun because the school made a whole event out of it. There was food and music and everyone was dressed up so nice. I even put together my best outfit which was a flowery crop top hand me down from B and some nice overalls. Looking back on some photos though and by the end of my exchange I became so dark compared to how I normally am. I guess because I was walking to school everyday but I really don’t tan that easily in Vancouver, just shows how strong the sun is in Japan. My home stay mother also made a passing comment (before the graduation) about how it would have been nicer if I stayed whiter...I don’t think she meant to sound racist or anything and I am just doing a literal translation of what she said but I think she was just bewildered at how much I just didn’t care all that much that I was tanning and the fact that I was able to become so tanned and that I never put any effort in to look feminine. It also is not common at all for Japanese women to tan and actually they often try their best to cover their skin from the sun in the Summer since looking “white” or pale is something most girls strive to look like there. Anyway, the ceremony portion of the event was really nice and some of the exchange students who had been there longer gave a little speech. It felt super bittersweet to be saying goodbye to all my friends that I had met there from around the world. I met people from the U.S, the Netherlands, France, Vietnam, and China and we shared so much together whether in class or at some university event. I tried to write a letter to some of the people that I was close to and I ended each one with a little message that is a bit cheesy but why not? This was a landmark event in our lives. I said something along the lines of “this isn’t goodbye but see you later!” because I was planning to see them again and I have already met with some of them since then. Later that evening, B took me up to Inasa mountain to look at the stars, enjoy the night view of Nagasaki and celebrate the end of my studies. It was a lovely end to an eventful four months both at my part time job and university.
The day after graduating was the long awaited dance event of the pier side festival! It was quite the exhausting night and I was super nervous about whether I would dance well at all but it was a success! I was able to dance in sync with everyone else! By the end of it all I was super red in the face from what a workout it was and that it was just super humid. It felt like the whole city was there to watch. It was a little embarrassing because some of my students were there too as well some of my teachers from the university but it was a lot of fun and really cool to be able to represent the university and be in the spotlight like that. It honestly went by too fast. You know that feeling of tension that builds up before you get on a really scary looking roller coaster but then you get on and it’s over before you know it? That’s what this kind of felt like. Either way, a really memorable experience and I’m super glad that it was filmed by NHK and I was able to get a copy. Actually, now that I think about it. I pretty much did everything but vlog/blog when it came to collecting memories of things that happened. I took SO many photos of things, a few videos (both on a really bad and worn out phone) and whenever something was being filmed I always tried to get a copy of it. The second day of the pier side festival was the day I got to fulfil a little childhood fantasy of mine; I got to have my first go at a Summer festival at night in a yukata or Summer kimono and it was a blast! I felt super pretty in B’s hand me down yukata that she gave me which had a pink flowery design on a black background. I walked around with R and Corn and later met up with B, ate at some of the food stalls and watched the pretty fireworks for a good 30 minutes. It was absolutely lovely.
On the 30th, one of the senior American teachers that I had mentioned before who was somewhat in charge of the exchange students threw what was apparently his annual end of the year Summer party at his house. It seemed a tad bizarre to me that all of the Japanese first year students (other years were welcome too) and all of the exchange students were invited to party it up at a teacher’s house to celebrate finishing our studies but oh well. R made me promise to go since she had to be there as well because she was on the culture festival preparation committee or something and apparently everyone in the committee has to go to this party so she wanted me to be there too. I didn’t mind at all, I mean, I had some reservations about it because it was weird but also because I had to be up early the next day but since a couple other friends of mine were going as well as H who said he’d drive us (this teacher’s house was in the proper countryside, middle of nowhere). From what I can remember it was an interesting but still strange night. Several of the students didn’t care at all about drinking at a teacher’s house and people generally let loose. My only problem was a couple of the female first years and one girl in particular who got super wasted and was dressed in heels  and was just being really loud and obnoxious but still wanted to follow me and a few others across the street, in the dark, from the house, through a wooded area and to the beach on the other side for some fresh air and to just get away from everything at the party. I was a tad annoyed but mostly concerned that these girls would hurt themselves although no one else seemed to care. I don’t remember much else from that night apart from the fact that we seemed to be there until sunrise. Although my friends and I spent most of it walking around outside and found a really pretty bridge to catch the sunrise. It was a nice way to end a weird night. Although, it wasn’t exactly over. I and the couple of other friends just mentioned, one of which being N, the girl I participated in the dance party with, had committed to being in the Nagasaki Peron boat race, again to represent our university and had no time to go home and rest beforehand since it was meant to start a few hours later at around 9 am. So H, being the sweetheart that he is, stayed up with us and drove us to where the boat race was to take place, parked outside a convenience store and we napped there for about an hour and a half, got some breakfast and were ready to go. I was truly living the exchange life with all these all-nighters that didn’t involve studying. The boat race was a hit as well. I remember being super pumped for it and not feeling tired at all. At some point I memorised a sort of cheer that is said during the boat race and began to basically chant it over and over during the race which seemed to help motivate everyone to row faster. I can confirm that according to a photo that I just saw from the event, I had a blast but looked super goofy.
Boy Drama Part Three: The Finale
Bet you thought this was over! Well, not quite yet. You see I never finished talking about what happened with E and you may think that it just fizzled out...but not exactly. Actually, my ending with him took place from mid/end of June until about the middle of July but since I spoke about Y enough in part 2, I thought I might as well dedicate part 3 to E. It was very strangely just a couple of days after the incident with Y that E messaged me again and pretty much insisted on a second date. He even invited me over to his house but I quickly declined that offer. This was all probably owing to the fact that I had spoken to him at the university just recently about how my phone broke and I panic bought rice to fix it but didn’t know what to do with the rice afterwards and then he offered to take it off my hands. He wanted to eat my phone rice. Well, one less thing that I needed to worry about I guess. Anyway, I was still kinda reeling from what happened with Y near the end of June and having to think about my final assignments, the dance at the pier side festival and wrapping everything up with university but E insisted on a date even though he should have known that I would be busy with assignments being that he was a teacher, but sure, whatever. I agreed to a date for the first Sunday of July but told him that it would have to be a much more casual one since I was planning to get some studies done earlier in the day before meeting up with him. Well, that was the plan. I really should have never agreed to meet up with him because I didn’t even like him anymore but I thought he got the hint that I lost interest and we only had one date that wasn’t really romantic or anything. But he insisted on this date and I didn’t know how to tell him that I wasn’t into him anymore or, well, I just didn’t want to, apart from all the excuses that I tried to give him. 
The plan was for him to do his errands that he said he needed to do and that I would study at a cafe for a few hours and then we would meet up at 9pm for a night time stroll and maybe to get a snack or something. That didn’t happen. I cycled up to the cafe at about 5pm and he was there. I was so confused. We had agreed to meet at 9 but he was there. To be honest, I was feeling a bit ill as well and just wasn’t at all in the mood for this creepiness. I asked him what he was doing there so early and he said that he already finished his errands and thought we could start our date early. Um what? I told him that I hadn’t even started studying yet and he said it was ok and that he would join me while I studied. You might be thinking that should be nice, right? A Japanese teacher to sit with while I did my Japanese studies. Nope. I set myself up, and opened my books and instead of starting a conversation or asking what he could help with or anything, he just sat there and stared at me while I tried to finish my homework. Ahhhh the creep factor was strong with this one. I withstood that for all of 10 minutes before I just thought, right, this isn’t working. I packed up my stuff and told him we should go for a walk since I couldn’t concentrate. I remember my mood just getting more and more sour because, I’ll be honest, it was my time of the month and I was pmsing and he just wasn’t helping the matter. We walked around the city and pier and I tried to cheer myself up so that I didn’t seem too mean but I just found him utterly boring by that point. I think at some point he noticed that I wasn’t feeling well or something so he began to fill the silence a bit himself but it wasn’t really working. We decided to go into a supermarket after awhile and get some ice cream. We bought yukimi daifuku which was a brand of mochi ice cream and was delicious so that did help things a bit. Afterwards though, I decided that it was late enough that I could probably get away with ending the night there so I said that I wanted to go home and then he insisted on walking me home and wouldn’t take no for an answer. On the way back, he began to talk about how he can’t wait until I’m not his student anymore and how he wants to be able to be super open with his affection towards me and hold my hand while walking and do romantic things like that. I was too tired to think too much about it at the time but it really should have dawned on me at that point that this guy thought we were a couple. We had been on barely two dates and still hardly knew each other apart from texting for like a month and talking at school but he thought I was his girlfriend. 
We got back to my house and I thanked him and was about to leave but he went in for a goodbye hug which I obliged him on but after that went in for a kiss and I kid you not, I ducked out of the way. I don’t know if he thought it was a mistake or something but he tried to kiss me a second time!! And I friggin ducked again. I don’t know what to tell you, it’s like something out of a sitcom. You can’t make this stuff up. I don’t know what he was thinking but after that I quickly said bye again and just ran up the stairs. Later on, he sent me a message saying he had a fun night to which I did not reply. I honestly do not know what part of that “date” he thought had gone successful enough for a kiss or even that he felt any chemistry between us because trust me there was none. *sighs* Why do I seem to attract weirdos? (not including the bf, of course)
A week or two passed after that and I wasn’t seeing much of him at university because I only had him for a speaking class and by mid July those classes were done but he seemed to be acting normal. Well, I thought he seemed fine but one day I got a long text from him calling me a coward and basically saying I was ghosting him and planning to leave without breaking up with him and just stringing him along and just a bunch of things along those lines. That’s right, he said breaking up. I’m not exactly sure if this is the case in general in Japan, the verdict is still out but I think showing a bit of interest and going out on at least one date even though I never specifically said that I liked him and wanted to be his girlfriend meant that I was in fact his girlfriend and I was being a crappy one at that. I don’t know what he expected, we never talked about a future or anything on the date (and a half) that we went on, or through messenger, but I was due to be leaving Japan in under two months and Nagasaki in just a couple of weeks and not planning to return for at least a few years so what did he think was going to happen?? Ah, I still cringe and am still so confused. I replied to him and told him that I was planning to talk to him about the fact that I was leaving and say goodbye (which was a lie but in retrospect I probably should have actually meant to) but that I was busy and that he should have known how busy I was. In the end, I told him we should talk about it in person so I told him that I would cycle over to the school the following day and talk to him for a bit since I had to go there for dance practice anyway. The following day, I did just that and oh my goodness the tension in his office was surreal. I went in and closed the door because I thought he probably wouldn’t want anyone to be hearing our conversation but then he got up and opened it and then just wouldn’t stop glaring at me which made me sufficiently uncomfortable. He sat back down and continued to glare and just didn’t say anything. I tried to open up the conversation and say that I was really sorry if I hurt his feelings and that that wasn’t my intention at all but said a couple of the same things that I said through text to him which was that I was planning to be leaving in just a couple of weeks and didn’t think much would come of our relationship but that it would be nice to remain friends if possible. Nothing. He did not say a word. He continued to glare though which made me unable to look at him and I was just facing my lap the entire time. I tried to apologise more and get him to say something but my efforts were futile and after about five minutes I told him that I had to go to dance practice and promptly left. It was unreal how uncomfortable I was and how creepy he was. I never spoke to him again after that either, I did see him around the university up until graduation though but we made sure to avoid each other.
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lazy-safetastic-13 · 8 years
Text
Together
Pairing: Fellcest
Words: 1, 789
Happy Valentine’s Day guys. I saw so much fellcest on my dashboard. Oh glorious day. Yes please. 
Though I didn’t really intend to write anything for the occasion. orz 
I was planning on writing a kustard, spicycinaroll and fellcest, but the laziness got the better of me. So at least I managed to finish one. :3 Was about to give up altogether. QwQ
Late but I made it. Woohoo~!
Sans wasn’t expecting much, and especially not on Valentine’s Day—a stupid and sickeningly cheesy occasion.
… Plus, it wasn’t as if his brother was one to celebrate the occasion, so he really didn’t expect the day to go by any different.
Slowly getting up, he headed downstairs to the kitchen. Rubbing the sleepiness from his eye sockets, he turned a corne—
“Sans, you’re finally awake.”
The small skeleton looked at his brother with confusion and surprise. Doesn’t he have work? “Boss?”
“Hmm?”
Sans took a seat, and almost immediately, a plate of spicy chicken and sweet potato noddle stir fry was placed in front of him. His eye sockets widened; eye lights dilating. It was his favourite.
“Wha—B-Boss?” He didn’t expect for Papyrus to know of it; a rare delicacy back in their hometown that he was fortunate enough to have a taste of at the time, but he never could have it again, and mustard had been a poor substitute. But his brother had been baby bones at the time, so there was no way he could have known.
Papyrus smirked at his brother, pleased and proud of himself. “Is something wrong, Sans?”
“Oh-uh, no. Not ... really?” He looked back to the dish, finding himself almost drooling from the aroma. And his brother was quite the cook. With eager anticipation, he grabbed his fork, and began to dig in.
Words could not describe how delicious it was; amazing enough that it brought him to literal tears. He didn’t think he’d get to eat it again.
“S-Sans?!” Papyrus was worried that he might of screwed up in his cooking, but his brother shook his head, finishing a mouthful before speaking.
“It’s s-so good, Paps. Really good. T-Thank you for cooking this for me.”
Papyrus sat on the seat across his brother, a smile adorning his features. “You’re welcome, Sans.” He watched his older brother devour it with enthusiasm and joy, and the tall skeleton found his soul warming at the thought of being the one to bring such happiness to Sans.
It’s been quite some time since he felt like he did something right. Well, other than having been honest with his feelings and confessed to his brother, that is. Their relationship had been tense at first, both lost on what exactly they should be doing.
But the surface had done wonders for Papyrus’ nature, becoming more patient and relaxed; more at ease now that they didn’t have to necessarily be wary of people trying to dust them all the time. Though he was still on guard when they go out, you can never be too careful and he wouldn’t want to be caught off-guard when the situation called for it.
Sans, on the other hand, wasn’t so receptive. Always wary, and twitchy; never relaxed unless he was at home.
Papyrus hadn’t pushed the topic, but he wanted to help in some way.
“So, uh, Boss?” Practically would’ve licked his plate clean if his brother wasn’t looking.
Papyrus had wanted to tell Sans to stop calling him that obnoxious nickname, but the small skeleton had told him that calling him ‘Boss’ made him feel secure, that at least there was something that hasn’t changed. After hearing that, Papyrus didn’t have the heart to stop Sans, and had eventually gotten used to the name, much to his dismay.
“Hmm?”
“Shouldn’t you be, uh, at work? Or something?”
“I have been dismissed to relax for the day. Undyne would be sure to call me if something were to come up however.” This was a lie since he requested for the day off a week beforehand. Though Sans didn’t need to know that. 
“Do, um, do you want to hang out with me? … Or something.” Since it’s Valentine’s Day and all, he didn’t say.
“What do you have in mind?”
Sans didn’t have anything planned because this was all on a whim. He needed to now though, not wanting to waste his brother’s time. He recalled something Alphys gushed about going to. A festival of sorts? “T-There’s a carnival at the Main Street. It’s going to be there for a couple of days, but maybe we could check it out?”
"Hmm, I suppose we could. Go get ready then. I’ll clean up here.”
It didn’t take long, and the two were walking side by side to the fair.
It was halfway through the trip that Sans wondered if it counted as a date. And he also remembered that he never got to ask how Papyrus knew of his favourite dish. Next time he would. 
The small skeleton was startled when something latched onto his hand, finding long phalanges intertwining with his shorter ones.
Holy shit, Sans didn’t know what to do. It was all too new to him. So he gripped tight as he looked away, a red tint colouring his cheek bones. He hoped he was doing this right.
They didn’t exchange a single word on the way. Sans tried to say anything to break the silence, but found himself not having a good topic to talk about in particular. Weather talk would just make the awkwardness worse.
Once they reached the entrance of the carnival, Sans inwardly sighed in relief while berating himself at the same time. Good going you idiot. What a conversationalist you are. You can joke around with others, but you can’t even talk to your boyfriend? Pathetic.
“Sans?”
“Huh?” The skeleton didn’t realize that they had made it inside, and that Papyrus had already paid for their tickets. “S-Sorry. I—”
He was cut short when skeleton dragged him to a bench to sit and left after being told that he was going to get them drinks.
Sans sighed when his brother left. Good job, Sans. Now you made Papyrus worry. What’s next in this date of yours? It wouldn’t be a surprise if things just go downhill and Papyrus ends their relationship altogether.
Just then, he was suddenly approached by a couple of canine monsters. There were three of them, and Sans found himself tensing and wary being surrounded; reminding him of the past.
“Hey, you alone? Want to come and hang with us? We promised we’ll show you a good time.” One of them had the gall to smirk, as if he was some big shot.
Sans almost scoffed, but he held himself back. It wouldn’t do to start something. It was better to look like the victim instead of the offender. But if the fucker does try something, he can’t be held responsible for busting the guy’s face.
So he pretended to look meek. “No thanks. I’m waiting for someone.”
“Oh, are you on a date?”
“Ain’t that cute? You sure your date hadn’t ditched you or anything?”
Sans gritted his teeth. They sure know how to grate on his nerves. “Can you just leave?”
“Hey, now. No need to be like that. Come on. Don’t be so stiff, let’s have some fun.”
Just as one of them was about to grab for Sans, a gloved hand caught the canine’s arm. “I believe my date told you to leave him.” Magic flaring at his eye sockets, Papyrus glared at them, making sure to exude an intimidating aura.
“H-H-Hey man, no problem.”
“S-Sorry for the trouble.”
“W-W-We were just about to leave. Have a good day!” They practically ran for their lives, and Papyrus huffed.
“Are you all right, Sans?” He handed a drink to his older brother, hoping it would calm him down.
“Yeah. I’m fine, Boss.” Gladly accepting the beverage and taking several sips, Sans sighed once more. He let out a pathetic chuckle, “Some date this is turning out to be. Sorry, bro. I’m not really good at this.”
Papyrus sat beside him. “… Me too … I don’t know if what I’m doing is making you happy, I don’t know if I’m doing anything right.”
Sans sputtered, unable to believe his brother had felt this way. “What? You’re amazing, Boss! It’s me who’s fucking up over here. It’s me who should be wondering if I’m making you happy at all.”
“Sans—”
“I haven’t done anything worth making you stay with me. A grumpy, tense, angry, and insecure fuckup that I am. I don’t deserve you, and sure as heck don’t deserve this kind of happiness.” Sans felt that he was making it worse by crying, and he did his best to wipe them away.
“Sans,” Papyrus stood to be in front of him and leaned down and embrace his lover. “I don’t know if any words of encouragement say will stay with you, how you deserve to be happy, deserve better, and even deserving a monster better than me.”
“Bo—”
“But one step at a time. Okay?” He moved back to look at Sans in the eyes. “We don’t know what we’re doing, but we can figure it out together. I may not deserve you, but I’m going to work hard to make sure that I do, because I’m not going to leave you any time soon.”
Reduced to slight sniffling, Sans slowly nodded. “Baby steps … Yeah, I-I can do that.” He laughed right after. “Stars, I embarrassed myself.”
“Who gives a fuck.” Papyrus raised a brow ridge as he straightened. “It’s something we’ll need to talk about eventually.”
“Heh, I guess.”
“Now, there’s still a lot of time before the day ends. Why don’t we have some fun while we’re here.”
Sans laughed freely, feeling the weight lifted from his shoulders. Then he smirked, “You think I’m going to let you beat me in carnival game stands?”
“Hah! I know I can.”
“You seem to forget your place, little brother.”
Papyrus crossed his arms; a wide grin matched his lover’s. “Like I’m one to run away from a challenge. If I win, you will not only do the chores, but you will also pick up your socks.”
“Challenge fucking accepted!”
It was a fresh start to a better future.
“Oh, and Sans?” The two were walking around to find a good game stall to start their rivalry.
“Hmm?”
“I want you to close your eyes?”
“If you wanted to kiss, you could’ve just done it you know.” Sans grinned but followed the request nonetheless. As expected, his mouth met the other’s, but something wrapped around his neck.
When he opened his eyes, he was surprised to a find that it was a necklace—a necklace with a ring knotted so that it stayed in the center. Lifting it up, he could see the small engraved words in the ring, ‘We will go together’.
“Together, huh.” Tears were starting to come out again, but he wiped it quickly. Enough with the water works.
“Happy Valentine’s Day, Sans.”
“… Thanks, Paps.” This time, Sans reached out to intertwine his hand with his Papyrus’.
And the two moved forward—together.
Hnnnngghhhh.... Idk man. I was planning on making it nsfw, but ugh. Too lazy. 
And SO rusty in the romance section. 
I can’t--*Spills blood* 
Thank you for reading m(__ __)m
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fashiontrendin-blog · 6 years
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Meghan Markle's father WILL give her away at the royal wedding
http://fashion-trendin.com/meghan-markles-father-will-give-her-away-at-the-royal-wedding/
Meghan Markle's father WILL give her away at the royal wedding
Prince Harry and Meghan Markle are set to marry at St George’s Chapel at Windsor Castle on May 19 2018 in the year’s most talked-about nuptials.
If, just like us, you’re literally counting down the days and chomping at the bit for every last detail of the upcoming event, this is where you’ll find everything we know so far.
Keep an eye out as we update it with every.single.detail of the wedding of the year…
Meghan’s dad WILL walk his daughter down the aisle
Both of Meghan Markle’s parents WILL attend her wedding to Prince Harry, it has been confirmed by Kensington Palace. After travelling to London the week before the wedding, the estranged couple will meet with the Queen and other senior members of the royal family. This will also be the first time that Prince Harry will meet his future father-in-law.
In a major departure from the traditional wedding format, Meghan’s mother, Doria will travel with her daughter by car to St. George’s Chapel where her father, Thomas Markle will meet the pair to walk his daughter down the aisle.
Today we have provided an update on the Wedding of Prince Harry and Ms. Meghan Markle.
Read the full statement here: https://t.co/bhrPnJtrNm
— Kensington Palace (@KensingtonRoyal) May 4, 2018
This comes announcement comes days after Meghan’s estranged brother wrote an open letter to Prince Harry declaring, ‘it wasn’t too late to back out.’
The date and time
The royal couple will tie the knot on May 19 2018 at 12 p.m. noon. The wedding will be televised so if you’re watching from the US, it will be an early morning!
Harry and Meghan will complete a two-mile journey on the streets of London after exchanging their wedding vows in front of the Archbishop of Canterbury, Justin Welby. The marriage service will last an hour, beginning at 12pm and finishing by 1pm, and it takes place in the castle’s 15th century St George’s Chapel.
The route, in case you want to pop by to cheer them on (of course, you will) will see the happy couple take a trip down Castle Hill, along the High Street and then along Sheet Street, Kings Road and Albert Road, before returning to Windsor Castle along the Long Walk. Phew!
After their drive-by, they’ll greet their guests from the ceremony at a reception at St. George’s Hall (a very fancy location, if you’re asking). The close friends and family party will be hosted by Prince Charles – as he did for William and Kate following their 2011 ceremony – at Frogmore House (and we are sure there will be plenty of dad dancing – we’re looking at you, William, and banging club tunes).
The dress
After months of speculation, there’s been rumours flying around left, right and centre about who will design the wedding dress of the year.
Bookies suspended betting earlier this year on who will be the designer of Meghan Markle’s wedding dressafter a flurry of bets were placed on Alexander McQueen. Royal fans will remember that Sarah Burton of Alexander McQueen was the lady who designed Kate’s ethereal gown.
Israel-based bridal designer Inbal Dror also recently confirmed to PEOPLE that – at the request of Kensington Palace (fancy!) – they sent a sketch for Meghan to consider.
Her dresses are often adorned with intricate embellishment while layered frills and sheer inserts are her staple. Ooooh.
Meghan’s pre-wedding wellness plan
Meghan is a walking advocate for the healthy lifestyle she preaches. In fact, her mother is a yoga instructor so that’s one of her secrets to staying in shape.
As for her healthy eating regime, she has previously said: “I try to eat vegan during the week and then have a little bit more flexibility with what I dig into on the weekends.”
So what does a *perfect* day in her food diary look like? She told The New Potato:
“A Clean Cleanse vanilla shake blended with frozen Ontario blueberries for breakfast, a Niçoise salad and glass of rosé, with some Grey Owl goat cheese and baguette on the side for lunch, and a leisurely dinner of seafood and pasta, and a negroni to cap off the night,”
We wonder if she’s tucking into a glass of rosé right now…
She also swears by running as a form of meditation – but adds balance to her lifestyle by gorging on french fries at weekends. A girl after our own heart.
The music
Kensington Palace has revealed that the music for the ceremony will be directed by James Vivian, the music director for St. George’s Chapel, where Harry and Markle are set to wed.
Cellist Sheku Kanneh-Mason has also been hand-picked by the couple to perform. The youngster won 2016’s BBC Young Musician and received a phone call from Meghan Markle herself regarding a performance at the wedding.
According to the royal website, he said: “I’m so excited and honoured to perform at Prince Harry and Ms. Meghan Markle’s wedding. I was bowled over when Ms. Markle called me to ask if I would play during the ceremony, and of course I immediately said yes!”
The Christian gospel group, The Kingdom Choir, will also perform, and there will be a few surprise guests lined up, too.
The couple’s gift from the Queen
While they’ve only asked for charity donations, the Queen is likely to give the couple a gift – and it’ll be a lavish one. Sticking to tradition, the Queen will most likely give Harry and Meghan a home. She gifted Kate and William with Anmer Hall so will no doubt do the same for Harry and Meghan. The couple are currently living in Nottingham Cottage in the grounds of Kensington Palace and have just welcomed some very regal neighbours. Indeed, Harry’s cousin, Princess Eugenie, has just moved in next door with her fiance, Jack Brooksbank. Just imagine the dinner parties!
The flowers
Kensington Palace has announced that the couple has chosen London-based Philippa Craddock to work on their flower arrangements.
In the official announcement, Kensington Palace wrote: “Prince Harry and Ms. Meghan Markle have chosen floral designer @philippacraddock to create the church flowers for their wedding.”
They also gave us an insight into the exact flowers the couple have plumped for, revealing: “The displays in St George’s Chapel will feature foliage from The Crown Estate and Windsor Great Park, and will use seasonal plants including branches of beech, birch and hornbeam, as well as white garden roses, peonies and foxgloves.
“The designs will reflect the wild and natural landscapes from which many of the plants will be drawn.
“The Royal Parks will also supply pollinator-friendly plants from their wildflower meadows. These plants provide a great habitat for bees and help to sustain healthy and biodiverse ecosystems.”
The florist herself also took to Instagram to discuss working with the couple, citing it ‘an incredible privilege’.
She wrote: “I am loving working with them, it is an incredible privilege, and the designs will be a true reflection of them as a couple, with sustainability at the forefront. We will be using plenty of locally sourced greenery and seasonal flowers including peonies, garden roses and foxglove.”
The cake
Kensington Palace confirmed that the couple is using Californian pastry chef Claire Ptak, who will whip up a delicious lemon elderflower cake for their big day.
In a celebration of Spring, the cake will be scattered with flowers, buttercream and zesty lemon – and we have little doubt it will be absolutely delish.
Food writer and food stylist, Chef Ptak, who runs Violet Bakery, was once interviewed by Meghan for her website, The Tig, so it’s hardly surprising she’s been snapped up.
Who’s going?
As well as royals, dignitaries and A-listers, over 2,600 members of the public are in with a chance at attending the biggest wedding of the year.
The 2,640 people will include ‘people who have served their communities’ and will be chosen by the Queen’s representatives from all over the UK.
There will also be a selection of people from the charities and organisations that the royal couple support (they are both huge charity advocates, if you didn’t already know).
There will also be 100 pupils from two local schools and a staggering 610 Windsor Castle community members and 530 members of the Royal Household.
The gift list
Prince Harry and Meghan are apparently shunning a gift list and instead are asking their guests to donate money to Harry’s charity via his Royal Foundation. How lovely.
A source told The Sun: “Prince Harry is a man who has everything. He doesn’t want guests spending lots of time buying him extravagant presents but he does want them to support his charity work.
“Obviously he has his own foundation with Prince William and Kate, and he also supports organisations like Wellchild and the Invictus Foundation.
“He’s expected to provide more specific information with the individual invites.”
The entertainment
While we can’t confirm whether it’s true or not, rumours are flying that THE Spice Girls will perform some of their classic hits at the wedding.
How do we know? Well, speaking on American talk show, The Real, Spice Girl, Mel B, admitted that the five-piece band will be attending the hotly-anticipated nuptials.
Presenter Loni Love asked Mel: “Do you know anybody that you think is gonna go to this wedding?” Mel nodded her head and mouthed, “Yeah, I’m going… I don’t know if I should’ve said that!”
When she was asked if she knew anyone else attending, she slipped: “Well us five Spice Girls… why am I so honest?”
Then she added: “This is where I’m just like… I need to go. I’m going to be fired!”
Please let it be true…
The mini-moon
According to The Irish Independent, Prince Harry and Meghan Markle will be spending time in Ireland soon after their wedding this Spring.
The couple will apparently visit in June or July for one night only and we’re bet the locals are delighted they’ll get a glimpse of the married couple for the first time.
Meghan’s wife training
According to The Daily Express, as part of her training, Meghan spent two days in the English countryside where she undertook some security training sessions, including a ‘kidnap and rescue’ scenario.
Members of the Royal Army’s SAS regiment taught Meghan how to act if she ever found herself in a hostile situation and apparently used live ammunition while rescuing the former Suits actress from her fake kidnapping.
The actress was also taught that it’s best to forge a relationship with potential kidnappers and even learnt how to behave if her rescuers are killed and she has to fend for herself. Talk about intense!
Meghan was apparently also trained on how to drink tea (a quintessentially British activity). According to the actress’ new biography, Meghan: A Hollywood Princess, and US Weekly, Meghan learnt the royal protocol and etiquette of tea drinking, including the specific way to hold the cup. Meghan was given the chance to practise when she took tea with the queen before news of the couple’s engagement was announced.
The hen party
According to Us Weekly, Meghan’s hen party didn’t quite involve willy straws and sashes; it was a much more civilised affair at the high-end, A-list retreat, Soho Farmhouse.
There’s 100 acres of lush green countryside, swimming pools, spas and even a milkman to deliver your morning milk; how very British.
The couple’s gift to the public
We won’t be getting a day off in celebration of the wedding (*sigh*), but the government is giving us another present to honour the royal nuptials.
Pubs will have their licensing hours extended during the weekend of the wedding so we can all raise a glass (or five) to the happy couple. Cheers, Meghan and Harry.
It’s good timing because May 19 also coincides with the FA Cup Final and Scottish Cup Final.
Bring.it.on.
In the meantime, let’s look back on the couple’s cutest moments…
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