#Autism Hungry Feed It People Asking Questions That Get Right Into My Specific Brain Rot

[officiallanxichen]

Yes I’d love to hear the elaborate thoughts, I’m very very intrigued! When I read your tags it totally made sense to me, so I just wanted to know more in case you felt like writing it up

Oh my dear anon, you have done me a grand service (given me a reason to infodump about my special perfect boys). I actually already have a 600 word document of unhinged nonsense on this very topic (in preparation for an actual scholarly discussion of my thoughts which i will write at some point in the future, probably after i finish finals hehe) so let me summarize my Thoughts!

I do have some specific text-supported reasons for headcanoning both james and thomas as autistic. Some specific things are: James' emotional dysregulation (those of you who were here for my guardian hyperfixation may recall my extended essay on my deep personal feelings on portrayals of emotional dysregulation in TV), Thomas' Hand Talking (lil mr stimmy i see you), the fact that both of them are Stubborn Bitches in SUCH an autistic way, which of course also brings in both of their commitment to their personal ideals to a fault, the list could go on forEver.

In addition to that, I think that reading their narrative through a disability lens gives it some extra depth and meaning. I connect SO much to the experience of having people who support your ideas up until you whip out the really radical wild and crazy suggestions (Let's Pardon The Pirates Because It's The Morally Right Thing To Do), which is an experience that is deeply tied to my own existence as a disabled person in academia. Obviously that happens to all marginalized people, but for me it's so deeply tied to the fact that lots of people can't get it into their brains that Some People Experience The World Differently And We Should Respect That and therefore reject "radical" suggestions for disability change because they can't fit that into their own worldview (this is a whole nother extended post...).

This is (to me) also really similar to that wonderful disabled experience of people being okay with disability until it gets Weird. Thinking here of some stims being cute and fun (aww flappy hands!) and some stims being Weird ("why the fuck are you chewing on that you're an adult!"), and also other related autistic traits (it's funny when i take you completely literally but when i have a meltdown over what you perceive as being a very small thing then I'm being immature). Again, this is less a textual thing and more this is similar to my experience, and if you read Thomas (and James!) as autistic then that puts this similar experience into a perspective of this being a pattern of rejection for being Too Weird Too Radical Not Fitting Into Our Norms.

Also getting into the James-specific things, the Hennessy plot twist where he betrays James to bitch boy Alfred rings really true to me as an ADHD/autistic queer person. I think many of us have had the experience of a mentor figure revealing that they hold beliefs that are harmful towards you as a person (the many profs I've had who have Deeply abelist ideas about how teaching should work and how teachers should present...) Of course, me experiencing (fairly traumatic, tbh) abelism in my field is significantly different from Your Entire Life Falls Apart Because Your Mentor Thinks That Your Relationship With A Man Is Disgusting, but the parallels are still there. There's also a certain amount of being surprised by a social line that you (or James) the autistic person wasn't aware of. Hennessy is going to be on board with James and Thomas' plan because he's been supportive of other things, right?? He's our ally......right?

Continuing this theme, the whole underlying narrative in the flashbacks about James' temper and how Hennessey doesn't know what he's going to do with it reminds me very much of how so many neurotypical people I know have this assumption that there are certain behaviors that everyone can control and everyone knows aren't Allowed. When I look at that through my own ADHD/autistic experience I see soo many connections to people getting frustrated with me for not being able to express my emotions in the Right Ways. I'm an adult, shouldn't I be able to not call out at the wrong time class/have a meltdown/yell/etc?? See above re: I Am So Obsessed With Characters Who Display Emotional Disregulation Characteristics.

In conclusion: I think that there are some really really delicious things to get into if you read their narrative through a Disability Lens! And that's not even getting into the intersectionality between queer and disabled marginalization. Being forced into a specific role by society and then being punished for breaking our of that mold, anyone? Anyhow thank you for coming to my TED talk I am always happy to yell about this topic due to having Gets Excited About Interests And Talks For 5 Hours Disorder <3