#Assume anything. 'yeah but now im telling you. I'd talk with you even if i wasnt getting payed. I think its nice' me: 😳😢 me too | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

boytoyhalo · 11 months ago

Note

Your Selkie au is super compelling! Plus you are a very good writer. A question, will you ever go into more detail about Pac's previous captive situation? I'm very interested in how you will adapt Fuga's lore into your au. ( Specially bc of Cell and Cellbit stuff)

I'M SO SO SO LATE BUT IM USING FITPAC WEEK DAY 3 (WHICH IM ALSO LATE FOR) AS AN EXCUSE TO FINALLY, FINALLYYYYY GET THIS POSTED THANK YOU FOR BEING PATIENT ANON AND EVERYONE ELSE WHO'S AN ENJOYER OF THIS AU I PROMISE IT ISN'T ABANDONED IVE JUST BEEN IN AN END OF YEAR SLUMP

selkie au snippet #4 (i think) || T || slash (ambiguous) || @fitpacweek day 3 (belated its actually day 4) AU day!!!

read the rest of my posts about this au here

"Can I ask you somethin' personal?"

Pac paused, hand suspended halfway towards the checkerboard that was currently serving as him and Fit's way of passing the long hours up in the lamp room of the lighthouse. He kept his eyes on the round piece he was holding as he deliberated on how to answer, sure that if he met Fit's gaze his face would give away his nervousness; "personal" could mean a wide range of topics, most of which would spell disaster for Pac and his poorly constructed web of secrets. He slowly placed the piece in it's spot on the board, fighting to keep his voice even as he responded.

"Mmm, you can ask, yeah. I might not answer, but you can ask." Fit hummed bemusedly, absently flipping his own game piece between his fingers and he contemplated his next move.

"What happened to your leg?" Pac's breath caught in his throat, and Fit rushed to continue, "It's ok if you don't wanna talk about it, I get it. I just- I mean, you've probably figured out how I lost my arm, right?" Pac looked up at the familiar, mechanical clacking of the veteran's stiff wooden fingers flexing in and out of their open position, eyes involuntarily darting to the gnarled pink scarring that crawled from under his collar and up to the side of his head. He quickly returned his gaze to the board, face reddening a little in shame. Thankfully though, Fit seemed far from offended. "Heh, it's okay, I know. It's pretty obvious. And besides, you're a smart man. I'd be surprised if you hadn't assumed correctly. Me though - I'm just brawn, I don't have a whole lotta brainpower up in this thing." He knocked his fake knuckles lightly against his temple, a light smile on his face. "So if you are okay with me knowing, you're gonna need to tell me."

A small, nervous laugh bubbled it's way out of Pac's chest, his face properly flushed now in a mix of embarassment and flattery. "Don't - don't say that about yourself Fit, you're smart! Smarter than me, probably-" He cleared his throat, redirecting his focus to the topic at hand (ha.) "I can tell you, I don't mind. It's just a, it's a tough topic, you know? I need to get my head in the right place." Fit nodded easily like he understood, which Pac supposed he did at least somewhat.

"Take your time, I'm not going anywhere." The selkie chuckled a bit, tracing the edges of the paneled glass walls that surrounded them as he considered the best way to talk around the subject; he knew, or at least had decided, that he owed it to Fit to give him some semblance of the truth. After all, they had been growing steadily closed for months now and yet Fit knew so little about his life. Which was out of necessity, or course, but his friend had been so kind and so patient with him, never demanding more information than he was given. Pac needed - no, he WANTED to let him in as much as he reasonably could. He deserved it.

"I..." He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, steeling himself to sort through the painful, tangled memories and hoping he would be able to hold himself together. He starts at the beginning, where he won't have to omit too much of the truth, though if anything that makes it harder to talk about. "Mike and I were on a merchant ship off the coast of São Paulo that was attacked by axis submarines a few years back." Fit winced sympathetically, patiently waiting for him to continue as he picked his next words. "We avoided the worst of the blast, but... Mike was in really bad condition, and I had to hang onto him with one arm and a piece of the wreck with the other while I waited for help to come. By the time someone found us, I was too tired and too um- too relieved to realize that we were being taken as prisoners and not as refugees."

It was all technically true so far, just with some important details omitted: like how they were only on the ship in the first place because their pelts were being imported as merchandise by a fisherman who believed himself to be incredibly lucky, and how they weren't taken as prisoners of war as Fit was no doubt assuming. Pac fails to suppress a shudder as he remembers the smug, taunting grin of the man that stood above him on the deck of his supposed refuge, two familiar seal pelts clutched in his meaty fists.

"I'm so sorry you went through that, Pac. You don't have to keep-" Pac cuts him off, already committed to opening up.

"No, I want to tell you. We," He clears his throat again, pushing down the memories of too-small tanks full of too-salty water, of needles and IV drips and white lab coats and pencils scratching on clipboards as he writhed in pain. "We woke up in some sort of facility, I'm not sure where exactly? I think the men who had us were European but that's all I remember, it's all blurry you know? And that's where we met Cellbit and Felps actually-" The image of frenzied black eyes claws its way to the front of his mind against his will, but he can't help a small smile at Fit's attentiveness as his eyebrows raise in intrigue, the checkerboard between them completely forgotten.

"Anyway, we were there for- months, I think. And long story short Cellbit ended up, um. He tried to- to eat my leg off?" It comes out sounding uncertain, Pac having realized there was no way to say it that wouldn't raise more questions. Sure enough, Fit's mouth drops open.

"Wait he- He tried to eat you?"

"Not- it wasn't- aaaaugh, he wasn't himself ok? They were- they were cruel to us, and they injected him with these drugs that made him all crazy and violent and they kinda just. Let him do it? It wasn't his fault, is what I'm saying." Fit looks disturbed, although significantly less so than Pac would expect from most people. He supposes bearing witness to the horrors of war would give you a higher tolerance to this sort of thing.

The thing is, it really wasn't Cellbit's fault. He had been there the longest of any of them, starved and beaten and forced through their cruel experiments since he had been a teenager. He was angry and desperate and hungry, and it was pure bad luck that Pac had happened to be the closest to him when the "researchers" had decided to test the effects of whatever combination of steroids they had injected him with. The ghost of his leg twinges in pain as it remembers the feeling of sharp teeth tearing through it's flesh.

"Wait so did Cellbit..." Fit hesitates, like he can't quite put together what he means to ask. "So he, bit your leg off? but how does that even-" He's interrupted by Pac giggling, and after a moment he joins in quietly with a confused laugh of his own.

"No, no he- he just did enough damage that the sci- that the jailers had to amputate it. And it wasn't that bad honestly, I mean, they weren't kind enough to knock me out before they started sawing but at least I didn't die!" His amusement at Fit's horrified reaction to his nonchalance almost drowns out the echoes of grief that his heart sounds for one of his fellow prisoners who hadn't been so lucky. Pac puts on a wide grin, forcing himself to perk up from his slumped posture. "So anyway, that's the story! Pretty cool don't you think?" Fit sputters a shocked laugh.

"Pretty- Yeah, sure, Pac. That's- *cough*- that's cool, yeah." It's a joke, obviously, but warmth washes over him anyway at the way that Fit lets him control the weight of the conversation like always. He wouldn't be able to handle trying to talk about his past seriously, and he's grateful to whatever higher power may or may not exist for bringing him Fit, who not only cares but understands despite being a human, and who always without fail meets him wherever he needs to be at. Pac doesn't know what he did to deserve a friend like him. "So, okay," Fit's voice snaps him out of the appreciative haze he had fallen into. "How did you guys get out? Were you released, or rescued, or..." He trails off, eyes imploring him to go on. Pac feels his face light up at the opportunity to discuss his favorite part of the tale - the only part, he likes, really.

"Oh, you're not gonna believe it. It was Richas! He actually saved us!"

"What?" Fit exclaims in elated disbelief.

"Yeah! So ok - they were keeping him prisoner too, but he was just a baby, like a, a toddler right? And the guards that were assigned to him treated him like their own kid-" Minus the horrible inhumane experimentation, of course. "- and he somehow, he figured out how to use their sympathy to get them to tell him where they kept all their keys," - and all the pelts - "and then managed to convince them to let him play with us alone. So he came to me and Mike and told us, so we told him to steal us some guard uniforms and figure out where the breaker box was, and after some planning and waiting for the right time we were able to escape by having him shut off the power and filing out with the rest of the guards! Mike wanted it to just be the three of us but I told him we weren't leaving the others behind." For all the suffering they had been put through it had honestly been comically easy - the facility they were at was small and not well guarded, probably funded independently considering that if any powerful government had proof of the selkies' existence everyone including the scientists would have been in a much bigger mess - the world was already at war, Pac doubted anyone was eager to add another variable to the conflict.

Fit crosses his arms and sits back, nodding in amazement. "Huh, so little Richarlyson is a hero! That's crazy"

"What, you don't believe me?" Pac shouts in mock offense.

"No no no I believe you! That kid is a fighter, I know it. So you guys all just stuck together after that? What about Bagi and Forever?"

"Ah, so- Bagi and Cellbit, they're brothers, or uhm- they're brother and sister, yes? And Bagi had been searching for Cellbit since he was taken, and somehow she ended up at the place we were being kept just a few days after we escaped, and she was able to track us from there. She's crazy smart, Cellbit and her both are. And Forever," Well, truthfully, Forever had just swam up to their pod and started playing with Richas one day while they were searching for a new home, and then the two had become inseparable so he just... stuck around. But Pac wasn't sure how to spin that into something that sounded reasonable for a human family, so he just went with "Forever just showed up one day and wouldn't leave." Fit laughed again at that, and this time Pac laughed with him.

It felt unbelievably good to tell Fit about his story like this, even with parts of it changed. Still, he wanted nothing more than to tell him the truth of what he was - he almost did, right then and there, swayed by the sound if his laughter and the mirth in his eyes. But, he reminded himself, that had to be a family decision; it wasn't just his secrets at stake. It was all of them, and as much as he loved trusted Fit and would be happy to gamble his own safety on that trust, he wasn't willing to risk his whole family.

...But, it would be so much easier if he could just say the whole truth. He wonders if Fit would react with the same attentiveness and amazement he gave to Pac's storytelling.

The rest of the day passed with little more of note, mostly filled with idle chit chat and card games. As Fit tries to teach him how to play Kings on the Corners for the third time, Pac finds himself thinking about how much Fit was changing his life without even realizing. A few months ago, Pac had never wanted or even tolerated human company that wasn't absolutely necessary. But now, he couldn't imagine not having the veteran around to occupy his time. In fact, when Fit had taken his first two-week relief back on shore after two months of service, Pac had felt inescapably lonely even when surrounded by his pod. Not even Richas, who had also been upset over the Ramon's absence, had been able to completely cheer him up. And while Pac's always been somewhat fascinated by humans, and had enjoyed watching the previous lighthouse keepers as they went about their work, he had never found himself as interested by any of it as he does when it comes to Fit.

"What is it?" Fit's voice snaps him out of it yet again, cards abandoned as he looks at him curiously. "You're staring."

"Huh? Oh, nothing, nothing! Just thinking about Richas and Ramon - what do you think they're up to?"

"They should still be hanging out with Cellbit, right? They're probably doing puzzles or something." Fit looks at the clock over on the left side off the room. "It's almost six, Bad should be here soon to take over for the night. Do you want to go join them and I can catch up?"

"Um-" Pac flusters, face heating up slightly. He's not sure why the emotional exhaustion of talking about losing his leg is what's bringing all these revelations to his mind, but he can't seem to pull his thoughts away from how much he appreciates the man in front of him. Which.... "Yeah, I think I'll go find them now! I'll see you soon?" Fit nods.

"Sounds good, Pac. I'll see you in a little bit." With a nod back at him, Pac shuffles out the door and makes his way down the tower. Instead of going to find Cellbit and the children, however, he beelines straight to the rocks where his pelt is stashed and hastily wraps himself in it's familiar comfort, sliding into the water before his limbs have even finished morphing into flippers. Surely a nice, solo swim is what he needs to clear his head.

...If only he could take Fit with him.

#stumbles out of the drafts covered in blood #my ass is gonna be late for every single fitpac week prompt at this point cuz dawg why did this take me like 5 hours to get done #anyway. i hope you like it. scream at me in the tags if u like it #ps i have begun outlining and drafting the full fic of this au #most of these blurbs probably wont be in it in full tho just for the sake of not making it 10billion words long #fitpac #selkie au #fitpac week

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arrowheadedbitch · 6 months ago

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Okay, I just spent, like over two hours talking about how a Leanna Firestone song (Tourniquet) is perfect for Shawn and I'll be damned if I don't make a post out of it so here we go, buckle up

Okay first of all, here's the song

Enjoy, it is VERY good

So let's get into this, yeah?

This includes my suicide attempt hc that I mentioned in a previous post in it

I have been listening to this song on loop and it's making me go just a touch feral

"You can get a new car, but you can't forget the way it sounds or feels to crash

High speed impact

Normally the first person I'd call was my dad"

But im imagining that hc/story we were talking about yesterday, so change the words tooooo.....🥁🥁🥁

"You can get a new car, but you can't forget the way it sounds or feels to crash

High speed impact

ALL BECAUSE THE FIRST PERSON I callED was my dad" AUDHDBJEHEJSJDJEJ

But, later on, I realised that the song ACTUALLY says "NO POLICE, the first person I called was my dad" NOT normally, which hits different in this context but doesn't actually change much

And like, him yelling it in front of everyoneeeee

Henry is THERE

They're all like....what do you mean by that...

He will not elaborate but now they know that apparently something bad happened to him because he called his dad?

"Shawn, what are you talking about"

Shawn does the dramatic "I said something I shouldn't have" hand over mouth clasp

He freezes, he stumbles over his words, then he makes a run for it

Everyone is just standing there confused as hell

It's such a not shawn thing to yell out and do tho that even Henry is slightly concerned

Or maybe just confused

Or offended at the implication that he somehow hurt shawn so bad with some random phonecall

And now there are a bunch of people needling him to tell them about wtf he was talking about

Pressuring him to tell them about this traumatic event

ESPECIALLY Gus, who would normally be in the loop about something like this so he's extremely concerned and maybe even a little hurt that Shawn won't tell him

Even Henry, who usually doesn't give a shit about this kind of thing, is trying to get it out of him

He mostly just wants to know what the hell shawn is blaming him for this time lol

But he doesn't get how serious this is

None of them do, that's why they keep trying to get it out of him

They just assume it's another one of those silly things he always has going on, not, yknow....SUICIDE

Not even his mom knows, maybe they'd try to call his mom bc he tells her pretty much everything and find out she ALSO doesn't know

Then they're like....Gus doesn't know......his mom doesn't know.....holy shit maybe this is serious

"Some people die before they're dead!

Building collapse, pressure outweighs the pain

I don't feel sad

I don't feel ANYTHING

Only will when the blood returns

But I'd rather be numb then know how bad I'm hurt"

Someone save my boy

He is emotionally constipated

His mom also might fly down to figure out what's happening after she gets that call

So now literally EVERYONE is bugging him about this

Poor Shawn, there's even a THERAPIST needling him about this traumatic event now 😭😭😭

And everybody wants to know

At this pace he's gonna become a hermit so he doesn't have to tell anyone 😭😭😭😭

"So, I'll keep the tourniquet on

I'll block it out and off

Cuz I don't need anyone

I don't need anyone

I don't need anyone at all

If I keep the tourniquet on"

I think all of this would lead to Shawn blowing up on then, maybe he'd say something that accidentally gives away more of what happened but I don't think he'll be able to bring himself to actually say out loud what happened, at least not to them

Because, well, emotional constipation, anyone?

He wouldn't talk about his feelings at gun point

"Maybe we always start

Back where we end

Don't know if I'm God

Or if I'm sisyphus"

But maybe change to

"I try to act like God

But I'm just sisyphus"

Or something similar

Now, to get into a SECOND POINT ABOUT THE SAME SONG HAHA!

So, this first part has been about Shawn saying the stuff in the song or just really good lines that he would relate to

But this next part is more of an....application for all of this

Imagine with me, if you will

Shawn does a few artsy stuff like....drawing that he doesn't really like to show off a lot, so imagine this,

/Shawn would totally be a good songwriter/

Imagine he wrote a few songs as more of like journal/vent things and he never wants them to see the light of day

This is while him and Jules are together btw

So, Juliet finds out about the songs, he tries to brush them off bc he doesn't like to think about them and he doesn't want her to see them, that kind of thing, but she reads it as insecurity

This is the same woman who went around Lassies back to plan him a birthday party and accidentally invited a bunch of criminals, so, I don't think it's that big a stretch that she would try to do something to make him feel better about his music and go behind his back a little to do it so she can *surprise* him

She grabs the first complete song she can get her hands on, maybe glances through it but makes the mistake of not reading it thoroughly and submits it to a song writing competition, if it loses, Shawn will never know, if it wins, boom! Boost in his self esteem about his songs!

A win-win plan, really

And the song she grabbed was the Shawn version of Tourniquet we've been talking about, obviously

Yeah, it's *her* turn to do something for *him* with good intentions that ends up being awful, she's not gonna be in the doghouse for this one...she's going straight to the pound

The prize for winning the contest? Well, a celebrity sings it of course!

And...well Juliet may have overlooked that it's sung.....on live television...

All classic song writing prizes, maybe you can win a record deal and a bunch of money too or whatever

Not that Shawn would care about any of that

Anyways, her and Shawn go to the place where they're announcing the winners, you know? Big party. Shawn doesn't know what it's about but he's having fun, probably solving a case here too!

But then he wins....

It's the big finale, announce the winner and sing the song on stage and on camera

"And, this song will be our grand finale! The winning song of the song writing contest will be revealed and sung!" So the singer gets on stage and Shawn is all smiles until he hears "And this song is...🥁🥁🥁 Tourniquet by Shawn Spencer!"

And Shawn is going through all the stages of grief, he turns to Jules all "What the fuck did you do" (Perhaps first time she hears him legit cuss??) [Ty Luka]

And suddenly Juliet realises that she should have read the lyrics a bit closer before submitting it

It's the first time she's seen him ANGRY because he is about to get angry

They get in an argument, Shawn storms off, she feels bad

But, the song was on LIVE TELEVISION

Everyone saw it! Everyone HEARD them attribute it to him!

And they don't know he wasn't in on it! They have no reason to believe he's upset about winning!

So, when he shows up at the station, everyone is trying to talk to him about it!

It's AWFUL

Gus is asking about it, but he stopped pretty quick when he noticed how pissed Shawn seemed about it

Henry's been calling him

He's been not answering, obviously

Juliet tries to talk it out with shawn but he's not having it right now, "Shawn, I-"

"You, shut up, you are in the /pound/!"

"*gasp* the pound?"🥺😢

"THE POUND"

And Lassie was gonna give him a hard time and ask questions but he saw that interaction and realised that he shouldn't touch this with a five foot fucking pole

The precinct feels oddly tense today because well....no one's ever seen SHAWN SPENCER so ANGRY

Or really angry at all

He really powers through solving this case and is actually pretty scary the whole time and he won't talk to Jules, they are not in speaking terms right now

Anything that he would normally go to Jules about, he goes to Carlton and acts like she's not even there while he gets Lassiter to do whatever it is he needs

No fun nicknames either, but what really hits? When he HAS to address jules.....he calls her Detective O'hara

So she REALLY knows she's in trouble

Obviously she's gonna do anything she can to make it better, we know Jules

So she asks around for advice on what she should do

Talks to anyone who will listen really, Lassie, Gus, she even goes to Henry

[Side note, I've been imagining she heard the song, like it was playing all throughout so they could hear it a little muffled from the spot they were arguing at, but she probably missed a good chunk because of the arguing and talking, though her not having heard it would be a really interesting turn to take! She doesn't know what was wrong with the song, only the aftermath, that could be interesting]

Anyway, she gets mostly the same advice, let Shawn cool down and then work it out

But, since she talked to Henry, he now knows that not only did Shawn not submit that song, he's pissed that it played at all

Which will affect the way he treats Shawn when they inevitably talk later

Instead of thinking Shawn did this to get back at him, he knows these were private thoughts that were shared against his will, so he'll be a little less defensive and accusatory

Gus doesn't know what exactly the song was about, but he gets to be the most in the know since he's the only person Shawn is really actually talking to right now

A lot of ranting to Gus about this, of course

Lassie has the least know of the situation because an angry shawn is a startlingly untalkative shawn

Shawn takes a week or two to stop being so completely pissed

He talks to Henry at some point, they probably have a moment or something, but he won't tell anyone what the song was meant to be about

Eventually he calms down enough to let Jules talk to him again and she gets to apologize profusely and work her way off the shit list

And now everyone knows about the depth to shawns character that he didn't want them to know about so he'll just have to slowly chip away at that by going back to being the town idiot as usual

Maybe he agrees to sell his songs as long as his name doesn't go on any of them, I dunno

Everything goes back to normal...eventually, but it takes...a while

So shawn ends it just as emotionally constipated as before but now everyone KNOWS he's emotionally constipated

Everyone gets to go "holy shit, this kid actually has emotional depth?!?!??"

And Henry gets to sit and wonder what he did to Shawn that was a "crash", what phone call? What did he do?

And Yeah, most of them forget probably

But also, there's that inkling of.......is he really okay?

Always in the back of his friends minds

Because

They /heard/ the song

Juliet goes over board trying to make up for it in a way that's so endearing shawn can't help but smile

And forgive her, but only after the third pineapple/hj

Gus is a little concerned but he knows Shawn doesn't want to talk about it so he let's it go

Lassie tries not to pry but he's still feeling kind of awkward about it (what is he supposed to do in this situation? Anything? Should he even care? Should be be on O'Hara's side because they're friends? Shawn's side because he was the one wronged? Anyone's side at all? Should he say something? Welp, he just won't do anything, maybe)

Buzz has no idea what's going on but did try to comfort Shawn a few times and it was sweet

Buzz never knows what's going on with the main four but we love him anyway

Henry has the song on loop trying to figure out what he did and if there's something he should do or say about it

And someone should definitely get Shawn a therapist but they don't

And the whole song is soooooo about his dad

So about his dad it hurts

Tho Gus is a little offended at the "I don't need anyone" part and he makes sure his thoughts on that are known

"I spend every night

With the TV on

I can't bear to be

Alone with my own thoughts"

And now you guys won't be able to stop thinking about this either, MUAHAHAHAHA

To the people who talked to me on discord, thank you!

@mores0 @storm-cloud-lightning

And also @j-snapdragon who joined right at the end

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thesuperiorgenshinaddict · 5 months ago

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can u do smthing with hiori yo and like reader has like abusive or like just toxic or something just wrong with the family and like hiori and reader like get closer cuz they both deal with the same stuff at home (strangers to friends to lovers)? long or short idc accept or ignore idc. Have a good day =)))

AN: ty for the request!! for what reader has going on in their family, i kept it vague cuz i obvs wouldn't want to assume anything, i hope you're doing okay though :> for this specifically, i did this pre-blue lock but feel free to ask for anything different! and more important AN: yeah i pumped reader w/ characterization kinda. like there's an actual plot which kinda makes sense kinda doesn't. ermmmm i might as well say i got slightly sidetracked but that's cringe!!!!!! CRINGE!1!!11 whatev hopw you enjoy... god im a failure

Pairing: Hiori Yo x GN! Reader Warnings: Hiori gunning down zombies in video games idk what else to say, uhhh shitty cliffhangers (less of cliffhangers, more like hillhangers or something)

HCs first:

Hiori's probably reserved at first. Let's just say that the two of you go to the same school or something, because I can't think that he would just randomly approach someone he doesn't at least recognize. I'd reckon that the two of you end up bonding because of coincidences, considering how he pretty much just does school -> home -> gaming and wouldn't go out of his way to talk to someone he doesn't have to talk to.

Coincidences as in being at the same park at the same time, or trying to get the same thing at a store, stuff like that. Honestly, he would probably not talk to you much and would just mind his own business. After he ends up running into you for the millionth time, he'd probably make some polite conversation because it's just getting too awkward. Something like 'Oh, you're from Class yap yapyap, right?' or 'Oh wow the weather's so nice today' (there's a typhoon).

At some point, rather you or him would end up saying something that breaks the awkwardness. Like maybe saying a less than normal joke but it ends up being funny, making a game reference, or shitting on a teacher that you both mutually dislike. From then on, Hiori starts actively hanging out with you.

Those coincidences end up becoming apart of his day to day schedule, morphing it into school -> park -> home -> gaming. He gets out of his house by telling his parents he's going out for a run to ease his nerves or whatever and spends as much time as physically possible away from them. Hiori will occasionally bring a handheld game console and explain game functions while sitting next to you because he still needs to finish the campaign, even if he's outside.

Even though he spends a lot of time with you, the both of you avoid the topic of spending time at each others' house. Hiori takes it as a win, but he still finds your aversion to it a bit off. As much as he tries to think of other things to do besides sitting on the rusted swings and having you watch him as he shoots goals for 2 hours straight, everything else seems redundant. He tried going to a café with you once, but after he saw the protein to calorie ratio of the drinks, he went straight back to semi-enjoying nature.

After a bit of contemplation, he asks for your contact information. He then has to convince you about the beauty of Discord and why it's better then Line messaging and gives you his username. Majority of his messages are 'hru' or 'r u up?' or screenshots of his homework so you can copy it. Or you don't if you're a very awesome cool honest student. Good for you.

Hiori does long calls with you and just plays video games in the background. Although, it's slightly difficult to focus on his voice because his button mashing is insanely loud and because the playing game status has been running for a while (21 days straight).

Now that he acquired the ability to communicate to you from his phone, he is able to actually plan stuff to hang out. As soon as he finishes his football practice, he heads off to see you.

But, of course, all good things must come to an end. Or a pause.

Slinging his tote bag over his shoulder, he opens and closes his mouth like a fish before he starts searching around the park. A bypasser walking their dog turns the other direction as the six foot man crawls around on the playground slide. Despite his usual calmness, his heart races in his chest.

After 7 minutes of just wandering around, it clicks in his brain. Oh. You ghosted him. His shoulders slack and he picks up his bag; now dirtied with mud and woodchips, and he goes back home.

When he greets his parents at the door, his eyes flit to the floor. There's nothing to distract him from this sickening feeling. Hiori goes into his room, shuts the door, and turns on his console. He shoots the zombies until his eyelids start drooping and he falls asleep.

The next morning, he checks his phone from muscle memory. There's no good morning text. The only notification he has is from one of the cheap mobile games he downloaded out of boredom. Every class period, he raises his hand to go to the bathroom, and checks his phone again. Nothing. He goes to football practice and kicks the ball until the back of his heels have friction marks on them. His feet drag him to the park, across the damp ground, and he sits on the rusted swingset for an hour.

You don't come.

He doesn't see you at school. Days feel like years. Then months pass. He doesn't feel that... upset, per say, he just feels hollow. Like if someone was chipping away at his heart with a toothpick, or something. Weird ass analogy.

He still goes to that park everyday. Instead of talking with you, he jogs around the park and waits for you to randomly pop up and tell him 'haha lolz i was just trolling sry 4 ghosting u OwO'.

The brainrot is got so strong that he literally found himself accidentally buying two Yakult drinks, one for himself and one for you. He still religiously checks his phone every hour. With his pent up energy, he gets seventeen more achievements in his shooting game.

At last, the day you come back. It's pouring rain and he's carrying his umbrella. When he lifts his gaze from the ground, he sees that you're at the park. He can't tell if he's mad or happy or confused or what. Hiori's heart races as he hovers his umbrella over your head and he says the most ultra cool uber awesome thing ever that expresses all of his strong emotions about your absence.

"Heya."

The conversation is stiff and Hiori kinda just talks. Not even about how he misses calling you or whatever. He talks about schoolwork, a new game he added to his steam library, and the weather.

He has a whole yapfest in the most polite manner possible.

Then he makes one snide remark about his parents and you actually join in on shitting on parents together and he feels his face heat up at the slightest. He's getting demolished by the rain and all he can think about is 'this is fun.'

It kinda becomes a bit of an inside joke. Hiori finds it funny. His parents' expectations feel a whole lot lighter now. 'Yo-chan, did you do football practice?' and 'Good job! I'm so proud of you for scoring that goal!' feel hilarious. It's like he's on top of the world, laughing maniacally. Whenever he teabags on the guy he successfully guns down in the games he plays (good sportsmanship my ass), he imagines it's his parents taking the L instead.

He makes it his unofficial mission to spend as much time with you out of the house. Aquariums, libraries, theaters, things of that sort. When it starts getting dark outside and you both have to head home, he reminds you that you can always call him.

While he's playing a new game that's more story-based, there's a side romance plot that makes his jaw slack as he realizes. Hiori's been taking you on dates. And he enjoys them. When he goes to sleep that night, he has a dream where he runs away with you into the horizon, away from both of your families and away from his parents' expectations.

It takes him a long time to think of the optimal confession plan. In between practice and football matches, time passes a lot quicker than he would like, and he needs to confess soon. Or else, he'll be swept away and graduate and become a professional football player, where his life will revolve around football and not what shitty movie he should watch with you.

His plans are ruined when he sees that you seem a bit off. Your eyes are a bit redder than usual and your posture is slouched. He ditches the movie and the two of you go to the park and walk. When the sun starts setting, he swallows down his fears of rejection and gently squeezes your hands.

"I- I like ya a lot. Will," He pauses, and he notices that his grip is shaky. "Can I be yer boyfriend?"

boom cliffhanger i'm tweaking the fuck out hope you enjoyed (please tell me you did im so sorry if i fucked up big time) Fic... thing?

Hiori is a perceptive person. Whether it's because he's gotten used to making note of things while on the field or just programmed into his nature, he doesn't know. For the most part, it's not something he cares much about. The things he notices are buried to the back of his mind. It's mainly unimportant things that he ends up noticing; the gossip that the kids sitting in front of him are very unsubtly whispering about or whatever TV show everyone's watching; none of which he cares about.

It had rained despite the what the forecast had said, and afterschool football practice was canceled. The students who were unlucky enough to not have an umbrella had speedily biked away, trying not to get drenched by the rain. The lucky ones strolled around and talked about going to karaoke. Although his peers' clothes were drenched and a few of them had slipped in puddles, even under the safety of his umbrella, Hiori didn't feel particularly lucky. "Yo-chan, we saved up and bought you this nice umbrella!" His free hand reaches up and runs over the smooth material of the handle. 'That's right,' Hiori thought bitterly. 'If I catch a cold, I can't play football at my full potential.'

Keeping his gaze focused on the ground, he walks and all he can hear is the sound of the rain. The sleeves of his uniform get a bit wet. His legs move on autopilot and before he processes it, he's at the same park that his parents used to bring him to. He avoids the mini football field like the plague and goes to the playground.

It's empty. The rain must have drove everyone away. The first time he sees you, you're sitting on the swingset by yourself. Hiori momentarily thinks about how he's seen you in school before, but he minds his own business. He drowns out the sound of the rain and the creaking of the swings and puts his headphones on. He blasts death metal to avoid his thoughts. For some reason, his so called 'perception' is giving him a weird, murky feeling about you.

He chalks it up to be another football skill and doesn't think about it for the next month.

The next time he thinks about his perception is when he's on a call with you. He explains game mechanics while sharing his screen. "This one has higher health, but lower defense. It's better to shoot it from a distance, it only takes a few shots if ya have good gear," He rapidly clicks a few buttons and does a triple kill combo.

You're adding to the conversation, so it's not just him talking, but he still feels just a bit off. "This one runs fast. It's better to kill it off quickly than worry about it later." With a wry smile, the zombie dies. "This is currently the most meta weapon. Ya can get it from the battlepass. It has a lot of ammo, quick to reload, and has better than average range. The best part about it though is its fast shooting and aim function."

His eyes flutter shut before he mentally prepares himself to ask if you're okay. and boom cliffhanger because me big tired AN: uhhhhhhhhhhhh what was i gonna say i forgot okie toodles :3

#blue lock #blue lock x reader #hiori yo #bllk #bllk x reader #hiori x reader #hiori yo x reader #i heart skibidi toilet

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thewebcomicsreview · 1 year ago

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Homestuck 2 updated today! Even I'm not enough of a dork to leave a Christmas Party to go read Hamsteak, but it got late and I'm back now, so let's do it. Months ago, but not many, before Alt!Calliope collapsed. Has it really been months, in-universe, since Dave/Aradia left Candy? Time is confusing, especially in Homestuck.

Oh wait, this is after Jade broke free of Calliope's control back in Chapter 6. That was months ago? Man, it's so weird how we've cut back to the Meat Rocket several times since then and Jade just....hasn't done anything or said anything about being possessed? At least onscreen? Totally glossed over.

Probably the biggest mystery in HSBC right now is who the Candyland narrator is. The "Lady" giving commands is clearly Alt Calliope, so who's the narrator pushing back on her here?

Oh. We have another Alt Calliope. An Alt-er Calliope. This seems to literally be the same person as Alt Calliope, though, since they re-fuse. Maybe this is something to do with Ultimate Selves, which might be why non-Alt Calliope is so afraid of her.

Cutting from Alt Calliope talking about decorum to Davebot and Aradia taking selfies with her corpse is a cute gag. I'd forgotten Aradia had a new Calliope-themed outfit. That's kind of weird.

DAVEBOT: to be fair this was typical teen jade behavior DAVEBOT: honestly shoulda done a little more research into that host body

Oh that's an interesting explanation for why Alt-Calliope-In-Pre-Retcon-Jade's-Body passed out (and almost certainly not the original team's reason). But Jade's narcolepsy was Vriska-induced.

DAVEBOT: you just went on another one didnt you ARADIA: yes DAVEBOT: who did you meet this time ARADIA: the necr- DAVEBOT: no dont tell me its simply too much to bear ARADIA: are you doing a bit DAVEBOT: of course im doing a bit

I do like the idea that Aradia uses her time powers to have entire adventures in between sentences. I suppose this also makes Pesterquest's Aradia arc canon, since that involved a bunch of HS2 stuff. I haven't played Pesterquest in forever so I don't know if the "necr-" ("necromancer"?) is a reference to that or foreshadowing.

ARADIA: actually i doomed thousands of timelines DAVEBOT: thats kind of fucked up ARADIA: yeah! ARADIA: to be fair i was doing it on purpose DAVEBOT: thats even more fucked up

Aradia is the best troll.

Dave's pillow wearing sunglasses is a great gag. Also, a cute character moment. Those glasses were a gift from John, and Dave kept them even after becoming a robot.

ARADIA: i could go see him right now DAVEBOT: you wont ARADIA: i wont 0u0

Assuming "him" in Sollux, that seems to imply that Aradia can come and go to Candyland freely, which is...interesting.

ARADIA: youre welcome 0u0 ARADIA: anyway the point im making here is that some of these missteps end up serving a grander purpose ARADIA: things that seem unimportant or even “wrong” can end up being essential components of whats meant to happen ARADIA: and who even decides whats wrong in the first place? DAVEBOT: i dunno megido thats borderline blasphemous

This is pretty obviously about Candyland, especially since Dave just shit on his pre-Ultimate Candy self as being a different person from a "lame" timeline, and "How much does it matter if something is canon or not?" is the question HS2 is allegedly about in the first place. But also I kind of like this nerdy time shit philosophizing even without the thematic subtext. The Homestuck EU has mostly been "Trolls! Aren't they neat!" and Ultimate Selves, but the Classpects haven't really been talked about much for a long Time.

Dave also refers to "Skaia's alpha timeline" in this conversation, but it's never been fully clear to what extent Skaia was pulling the strings. The "alpha" timeline was just the one with no paradoxes, and it was Lord English, not Skaia, who was making it so restrictive.

ARADIA: whats the right way for a butterfly to flap its wings? DAVEBOT: the way that doesnt make me gay

Dave...you are gay. You've been gay since Homestuck proper. It was a big part of why your marriage to Jade fell apart. Ultimate Dave is comprised of all Daves, and since Dave quit time-traveling before figuring out his sexuality, he seems to have regressed somewhat.

Dave was always scared of creating Dead Daves. "Dead Daves are the enemy", and it's why he doesn't time travel any more, and Aradia here seems to be arguing that this is limiting him, that he can't grow and explore without breaking some rules and dooming some timelines. This is, of course, Thematic™. You can't go in an interesting new direction if you're too worried about sticking to what the story's "supposed" to be about.

DAVEBOT: also now feels like a good time to mention that despite my omnitemporal awareness of everything that has and ever will happen to me i actually have no idea where the fuck youre proposing to take me ARADIA: oh word ARADIA: fun huh? DAVEBOT: being real i kind of hate it ARADIA: woohoo! DAVEBOT: youre such a freak DAVEBOT: TONE INDICATOR: AFFECTIONATE

ARADIA: cmon you shithead

This is such a fun pairing.

Hm. Calliope gets back up right as Aradia and Davebot's feeling jam is getting somewhere and makes them stop. Hmmm...

Good update. Aradia is my favorite troll and this was Good Aradia Content. I am increasingly convinced that she is not a Handmaid to Calliope, despite the cult outfit. Also rather interested in what's up with the Double Alt Calliope thing, but I imagine that'll get a follow-up at some point.

#Homestuck #Homestuck 2

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samthecookielord · 10 months ago

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❤️ what's the weirdest question you've been asked?

1 says: "Pft, oh yeah I get a lot of those. Sometimes people ask me things like why is my coat so heavy or why was I in the hospital for a month and I'm just standing here like mind your own damn business."

2 says: "Sometimes people ask me why I wear such a huge bowtie!! 'It's too big for you' they say!!! 'You look so goofy' they say!!! Well to that, I say, nothing wrong with it in MY eyes!!! It is a LOVELY bowtie and it does NOT break company policy in any way, shape, or form!!! So I believe I should be allowed to wear it! Um... ahem... apologies for the rant!! I promise I am not normally this angry about topics!!"

(tourney)

Previous answers:

1 said: (R1:M2) - Q: "blows you up. For funsies" - A: "Pft, good luck doing that before I kill you first. Now that's the fun part. And I'll warn you, your chances aren't looking too great."

1 said (R2:M1) - Q: "if you could travel back in time and do one *selfish* thing, what would it be? No preventing disasters or anything" - A: "I'd kill that idiot old man again. Doesn't mess up the timeline or whatever because he's supposed to be dead anyway. Aaand I get to kill him again! It's not even selfish because everyone benefits from this so I should get bonus points."

2 said (R1:M4) - Q: "HOW DIVORCED ARE YOU" - A: "hmmmm im not sure! allow me one moment to consult my graphs and then i will get back to you on that!! ... it appears the answer is 0.01% divorced!"

2 said (R2:M2) - Q: "Hey so. Let's say hypothetically you weren't real, and suddenly god came down from the heavens to just. Tell you that you're like, a work of fiction or something. How would you react to that information? Let's say you were also given definitive divine proof that it's definitely true. How would you react to that information?" - A: "oh! hm! that would be... a bit worrying! assuming you are talking about [REDACTED]? oh but i don't think he would ever wake up just to worry people like that...! a-and even then, i have a job to do!! i can't make charts and buttons if i'm too busy fretting over small stuff!! so i'll just keep on keeping on!!"

#asks #sam oc blind date tourney 3

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mr-ribbit · 11 months ago

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Really hit a sore spot calling your long posts long I guess 🤷🏻‍♀️. Txttletale is the bigot. She's admitted to saying racist stuff before, there's screenshots. That's partially why I don't like the bitch, she's an asshole, I don't care if she's trans. Then when someone says anything remotely negative about her it's all "SHE'S TRANS! DON'T SAY A SINGLE BAD THING ABOUT HER BECAUSE SHE'S TRANS!" and then block your ears when it's pointed out how irrelevant that is for several reasons. So I guess I'm now forced to assume everyone still following/interacting with her after this turn a blind eye to racism when it's against certains groups or when it's coming from a popular person they like. No matter how lightly or harshly someone criticizes her (or someone in her circle), the fucking mob comes out screeching about transmisogyny. Get a new shield.

That's all I can be bothered to say. I'm tired. Maybe you don't routinely die on the sword for her whenever someone brings up her shittiness, but a lot of people do.

again, it's not a sore spot just because I responded to the thing you said. like yeah my posts tend to be long, maybe because I had a lot to say maybe because I ramble. im not mad about it, I just thought it was worth pointing out, particularly when you were telling me to fuck off and mocking me for "caring about people's feelings". did you want me to just like... ignore your ask? do you imagine everything I'm saying is being screamed through tears or something? for context on the following post: I am chilling typing it on my phone and making a stir fry.

you say you don't care that she's trans, but it's literally half of your message. you might not care that she's trans but it's being brought up because of how it feels to be on the receiving end of this type of pattern when transmisogyny is so prevalent and uses the same tactics. it's not being used as a shield, it's being brought up because it is something she is experiencing. if you personally don't think your vitriol towards her (and me, another person you do not know but feel comfortable being kind of mean to) is related to gender, then great. but it's still mean and other people who *do* behave this way because they know she's trans have been saying the same things. so it is possible that her, my, or others' responses are not actually about your extremely specific grievances, but the large amount of grievances being received from multiple places

the reason she's admitted to saying racist stuff before is because she has acknowledged that it was racist and apologized for it, admitted she disagrees with the sentiment now, and illustrated why her post was wrong so that others who had agreed with it would understand. im not gonna speak much on this part because it's not my place to decide what racist stuff is ok to forgive and what isnt and I don't think anyone wants to hear that for me, but I do think that if you think she is a bigot, you should block her account and ignore her posts. i don't really see why you would only bring it up here to shame me, an unrelated person, for defending someone against bullying. it doesn't seem very respectful to the actual people hurt by that post.

also again I'd like to point out that parts of your message here intentionally paint me, her, and more importantly all other people that care about transmisogyny as "a screeching mob". this is the kind of stuff that makes it look like you do actually disrespect trans women / allies. it's the same thing a lot of bigots do when they want to depict someone as irrational, crazy, or otherwise not worth hearing out. even if you disagree with me, her, or others on this, I'd much prefer if you just talked about it rather than tell me I'm screeching and rambling and shielding and doing all of these things that make me out to be less of a person than you. this isn't an accusation, I'm just trying to explain how you're coming off so you can understand why people might still think you're being mean to trans women.

again going back to my post, my main point is the same as yours here: maybe some people here *aren't* attacking certain people just because they're trans. but they're still being really mean and targeting single individuals in a way that is upsetting to me, and feels unfair and immature. and what trans women ARE trying to say is that, intentional or not, it sucks how often it happens to them as a group, and they'd like to be given a chance to explain how that feels more often without being told they're whining, screeching, aggressive "bitches"

also like i am not "dying on a sword" for her, she is my friend who I know is not a horrible person, and so i thought it might be okay to speak up on the matter because I think people are being mean to my friend. sometimes people can talk about things without it being a sword death

#cw discourse I guess #cw transmisogyny //#cw racism mention ///

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humanitys-strongest-bamf · 1 year ago

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hey, kat. it is that anon.

i just came here to apologize for just ....yeah....how that all went down. i wrote that message in haste. i'm abc so when i saw your post my first thought was "wow kinda not cool of them to say that" but then i thought about how i would've posted the same thing if my relatives were fatshaming me. i agree with you that--especially in a predominantly white society--that we have every right to speak to our identities and cultures, including their unrealistic beauty standards.

i looked through your about-mes and couldn't find any mention of your identity, not that you have to disclose that tho. at the time, i tried to think "how can i tell this person that what they said is not ok if they are not-chinese, but that they have every right to (and i can relate) if they are?" and obviously i did a poor job conveying that. i was weighing the possibility that you were white and saying something racist against the possibility that you were also chinese and you had the right to say that.

didn't want to come off anon because we're moots who just haven't really talked much and i don't want to get off on the wrong foot because i was hoping to become friends eventually. i'm not sure if i can salvage things, so if you want me to just unfollow that's fine.

once again very sorry for my miscommunications. like i said, i was feeling kinda fiery as i thought about the possibility of that post coming from a white person. i hope my apology can bring you some peace. wholeheartedly, i hope you are okay and im sorry once again.

(editing bc I was too stoned to see the part about you being abc alskdkfjfg)

honestly, i think the main thing was that this could have been avoided if you had dm'd me. i'm a *tad* less agitated about it now because i've had time to process and took some anxiety meds.

and thank you for taking the time to clarify. i appreciate it. and again, i get it. you were trying to watch out for a marginalized group. communicating through text is difficult.

tldr;

- you don't have to salvage anything - me explaining the white savior complex a bit more, although I appreciate you clarifying about being abc (so am I!) - although i'm still not okay with the original ask i do appreciate you reaching out again and taking the time to clarify - i'm sorry for being so hostile about it /gen - if you do want to chat feel free to dm (whether about this or hornyposting - i'm stoned af rn lmao and am chilling, esp now that you've taken the time to clarify/reach out)

i wouldn't worry about salvaging anything because it doesnt need to be. you taking the time to type this out already says the world about your position and intentions as more genuine and, honestly

most people don't know. my main gripe was the feeling that someone was trying to come in and shut my voice down. with the invalidation that i have dealt with personally, but also as a community that is constantly having our voice stomped on, the comment about feeling the right to say it was what set me off.

I'm sorry I just kinda assumed you were white (guess we were in the same boat there lmao), but a huge thing that irks me in general (not isolated to this obvs), is that a lot of the people that do these types of callouts are usually someone with multiple dominant identities, and rarely the identity of the group they're trying to protect. and this is a huge problem in the social work field especially because the dominant group is *constantly* speaking FOR the marginalized group, regardless of its what they want or not.

anyway, i'm glad you reached out. i'm still not okay with the ask, but you bringing clarity to it does make it a bit easier to deal with. if you want to come off anon and dm me, i'd be glad to talk and chat, even if it's about this (or levi ackerman's cock idrc)

with anons, comes an extra layer of unease, animosity, and uncertainty, so the potential for miscommunication is very high. but again, the fact that you came out, clarified, despite technically not even needing to because i never would've figured out who you were anyway, says much more about your intentions and authenticity (positive) more than anything else could have

sorry i was so hostile in my responses. this is clearly something i've had to tell people off about. my offer still stands, if you want to dm, please feel free (i'm nice once you get to know me i swear LMAO) to

#kat chats #cw: racism #cw: weed #tw: discourse #maybe? idk #anyway sorry i freaked out the bpd kinda possessed me this afternoon #hope i didnt scare you off i'm normally nice i swear ksjfksdjfkjdsf

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temporalbystander · 2 years ago

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Okay I've had a good talk with myself and I think I'm ready to finally finish this episode.

Umm... LB? Do you need your eyes checked? What part of the scene in front of you makes you think that Kagami has been captured? He's not transformed, there's no senti- err... I mean he has nobody helping him, if anything I think you should be telling Kagami to let Felix go. Heck I'd bet on Kagami even when he is transformed. And speaking of the transformations. Since when does detransforming erase your scent? That's not how scent works. I was looking forward to seeing Orrioko get someone who knows how to use their power and instead? We get this.

Bravo Felix. You got closer to Kagami in one day then I did in a month. I suppose having things in common really does speed up the process huh? That and having an already open hearted Kagami... Honestly Im trying to praise them both and yet I can't help but feel upset for some reason. Maybe Ive been taking to long? Thats probably it. I'll see how quickly I can wrap this up and then have an early night.

Oh goodie. Looks like I'll be getting that team up sooner than I thought! Though I will say I have no idea what good a pair of scissors is going to do against these... She's going to cut the bowstrings isn't she? If not then I really do have no idea how that lucky charm is meant to work, well then again who other than ladybug actually does?

Oh. I was right... That was.. remarkably simple. They said they had to trust Felix yet he transformed and just jumped into the giant drainage behind him. Was he going to get his cufflink back? I assumed he threw it down there just to spread his scent around some more.

Clearly. Anybody could see that. Oh wait. So yeah, Felix bailed, Ladybug gave Tomoe a spiel about Monarch being a terrible ally, oh the irony, and now we've got this. Hopefully theyre starting to trust Felix more, this wouldn't be the first time someone misused the miraculous and ended up a good holder. And I'm not just talking about Chloe, Marinette and Adrien have had their moments too. I do have to agree with Gabriel though, this one is one her. Her use of pretension was terrible and instead of using Voyage to get away or stop Felix from running she just got tied up.

Yeah we all know where this is going don't we?

Here it comes... also this conversation just shows what a witch Tomoe is. When Kagami is finally getting some nerve too.

And there it is... Now. Should I finish the episode or cut this here? Well considering we still have yet to see the fallout for Adrien? Yeah I'm going to do a new one for you guys.

#mlb season 5 spoilers #mlb spoilers #lets watch #oc rp #ic #miraculous oc #pretension spoilers #ml pretension

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dafidiary · 5 months ago

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Today my father called me a burden.

Hi.

Im about to go to college pretty soon..and I'm jobless at home at the moment. Look my friends and acquaintances have called me out for being someone with soo much attitude and I often just felt insulted and sad when they'd think of me like that when in reality I just have a hard time talking to people and even befriending anyone.

I don't blame then anymore cause when my own parents can't understand me, i don't blame anyone anymore.

They assume everything I do is deliberately done and that I have zero respect for them or anything I engage in. How do I tell them that? How do I tell them that anything they say is very untrue?

I've been hating food and eating and basically I just never have a appetite really. Guess who got blamed for that? Guess who's apparently "deliberately" not having an appetite? Guess who's throwing an "attitude"?

Let's say you love sushi. Would you like it if I gave you a million sushis at a time just cause you like that? Would you rather get sick of it or would you eat them all? Wouldn't you grow sick of that food cause of what I did to you the last time you ate it? Am I wrong??

Would you like it if I forced you to eat a food the way I like it? Would you not like it eat it your way? Would you like to be forced to be eaten food when you really aren't hungry or you just aren't interested in eating that rn?

Guess I'm wrong cause I asked for a little bit of food even after I've denied eating and also didn't want to eat it the way they want...

Guess who got asked to get out of the house for doing so? ....

My dad got pissed and asked me to never eat the food if I had so much attitude. Having opinions and intrests is attitude in my household. I eventually just left the food but my mom handed it over for me to eat again after she had started the entire tea and had snitched on me. I just ate the food and left. Later for dinner I was told how I am a burden of a child and that a child with so much attitude must not be at home at all. And that I have never accomplished anything in life and I've never been a source of peace. And that I'm a brat and assume of so much sophistication in the house. My father said he hates me and doesn't really wanna talk to me. My mom just counter agreed to all his statements.

It hurt that my father said those words cause he was the man that I really thought was kinda there for me to understand me and to be proud of me. The man's words that was once like the flames that motivated me just pierces me.

What do you want me to do? I just sat there.. crying and sobbing silently pretending to watch what was on the TV. Unfortunately it was a bit too loud. He had also said that these actions of mine just show hints of why he must never approach me in his old age and that he would never come up to me in the future. And ofcourse my mom agreed to his statements. Honestly I don't know what I did for him to say such things. I'm really trying not to cry too much. Thanks to some eye irritation I have, it makes my eye look swollen already so they'd not get mad at me for crying and having swollen eyes in the morning. Yeah. They make fun of me and humiliate me when I cry and ofc get mad it and blame me and my attitude that I don't think I have a problem with.

For them I am not the kid I was once to my family but they're to me still the family I love. Thanks to that i couldn't swallow anything from the plate and I felt like puking so I just sneaked the solid food into my pockets and dumped them in the trash and collected myself for a moment and prayed to God that id leave this home soon and left to bed.

Usually I'd just text my sister about my worries but i didn't seem to really receive anything from her end since she just continued to blame me until one day I asked her not to. Thanks to her.

They're not wrong. I've always wondered how I was not their burden really..guess I know now. And yes..my father was drunk too so I just know for fact that nothing he said there was a lie.

#diary #i need to leave #i am tired #i feel like shit #help #i hate it here

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jackienautism · 1 year ago

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fe3h update! well i just finished my first playthrough and i am just sitting here.... the second to last battle was SO hard for me and it was definitely made harder by the fact that i like. played it weird. bc i thought if i just completely avoided her i wouldn't have to kill mercedes so i took all my units on a really weird path and then once i finally killed everyone else turns out. i still had to kill her.

i managed to get to a support between byleth and all of the eagles except linhardt (still mad about that.... i wanted to get the whole set </3), as well as marianne, sylvain, ingrid, and felix (who yeah, i did end up recruiting).

as for my ranking of the eagles... it's really tough to pick! it's closer to tiers for me, bc some of these characters are so close to each other in my ranking. i'd probably go... dorothea, caspar, bernie/hubie/edie, petra, ferdie, linhardt. dorothea and caspar are probably my absolute favorites now. and because of that, i think they're gonna be the eagles i recruit on my VW playthrough (and maybe. all subsequent playthroughs too LMAO) . from the lions, i think i'm gonna take sylvain again bc he's easy to get and he grew on me, as well as mercedes. mighttt also recruit annette and maybe ashe? i barely interacted with them the first time around but i hear ashe is interesting in VW and annette has supports with claude, but i'm also trying to limit myself here lmao. i'm probably not gonna try to recruit both of them, if i even recruit one.

anyway! i'm genuinely sooo excited for claude.... also since i enjoyed marianne so much, i'm excited for her to be like.. more relevant LMAO.

i'm also gonna look into how to like... successfully build my guys this time around because i have a feeling i was NOTTT doing it well at all. which like... i don't need to have the best builds in the world or anything, as long as i'm having fun i don't need to be doing things "right", but like. i think i could maybe be having a bit more fun if i. knew what i was doing lol.

thanks for letting me give you these updates lol! i am having sooo much fun.

HIII OHOHO HAPPY TO HEAR YOUVE FINISHED YOUR FIRST RUN :D AND THAT YOU REALLY ENJOYED IT.... i lowkey forget the second to last battle ebut i assume it was the one w/ dimitri right? or was it the silver maiden one w/ rodrigue? forgive me its been a bit since ive played crimson flower dfgnfg but anyhow! SORRY THAT YOUR DIVERSION MADE THE BATTLE DIFFICULT FOR YOU....AND THAT YOU STILL HAD TO KILL MERCEDES ANYWAY ):

and damn </3 atleast you got thr A supports between the rest of the black eagles! i suppose theres always next route or next CF route that you can get linhardt's... i could tell you the gist of it if you want but im sure youd rather get it yourself. speaking of A supports, which endings did you get :o? like between the other characters i mean?

good tier list<3333 dorothea at the top as she shoudl be. and edie and hubie togehter as they SJOULD be. dorothea snd caspar as your faves are such good choices... quite the duo. and them being the eagles you recruit in your other routes is very respectable as well.. still cant believe that youre willign to Not recruit everyone but i totally understand the mindset as well. angst is good. but it also hurts. MERCEDES..... ooohhh i love her oh so much. she would def be a good choice. good luck limiting yourself btw dfgkdnfg annette and ashe are very good very goodd. im not particularly attached to them as ive talked abt before but theyre both very sweet characters. and have a lot of substance to them. plus their family situations and whatnot are very sad. so yeah! recruiting any of the blue lions to learn more abt them would be a good thing to do! esp if you didnt interact w/ them much in CF

YESSS CLAUDES ROUTE WAS VEYR GOOD.... AND I LOVE HIMS O MUCH ANDHIS RELATIONSHIP W/ BYLETH.... and yessss marianne ): my girl.... i will say that something that happens in verdant wind def shouldve been saved for edie's route but :/ soon enough you'll see what i mean. hope you enjoy verdant wind!!!!

and kfdngdkfg yeah i feel that. its quite overwhelming at times isnt it? as logn as youre having fun though thats all that matter sbut i totally understand wanting to like know what youre doing. a few videos and reading up on classes should help! what were your guys' final classes if you don't mind me asking? if you think youd habe more fun if you knew what you were doing, then id def go for it! good luck w/ everything!

and omg of course!!!! thank YOU for being so kind to keep me updated and whatnot! i always enjoy reading what you have to say and how you've been doing in game and otherwise :] hope you have a good day / night!!!!

#mine #text #asks #anon #my thoughts #my FE tag #FE #FE3H

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our-arospec-experience · 9 months ago

Note

Hi so I hope it's okay if i get something off my chest real quick, so like a week ago i took one of those little online tests but to see if a person was aro or whatever and i went in thinking "heh yeah i'll do this real quick just for the fun of it, im like 90% sure i ain't aro cause i've dated before so might as well" and i got the result of Grey-aro? Which i never heard of before so i ofc googled it (the test didn't explain it) and I laughed of course cause like i've dated a person before so i've had romantic feelings so definitely can't be that

But, when i thought about the time i dated that person, i can't tell if i dated them because i was attracted to them or if it was because i really wanted another close person to talk to? Cause when we eventually broke up (we dated for about 6 months) i wasn't all that hurt about it? I mean when they told me that they wanted to split i was a little hurt cause i thought i was losing them forever, but we still chatted just the same after (until we slowly stopped) and after like a week i didn't feel anymore pain from the breakup

And ever since then i've been really thinking about all the times i felt attracted to people, like yeah i would love to fuck them but like...nothing really else?? I mean i've always assumed i'd eventually get married to any gender (i am bi) but now idk and it's so confusing because as i've said i haven't dated much and i dont really know many people irl so i can't like really "test" i guess? whether or not i'd wanna date anybody

And another thing that confuses me is that i am an avid shipper, i love reading and writing ships and even reader inserts which is why im seriously doubting wheter or not i am grey-aro cause i've written so many reader inserts about my favorite characters that i find hot like kinda being romantic toward the reader so idk if that means i would want to date people?? I just don't know and it's hurting my brain when i really try to think it out 💀

And i don't wanna say that i am grey-aro cause i feel like i'd be faking it and i don't want people to yell at me, but i'm just so confused 😭

Sincerely, a very confused blueberry

You can identify as anything you want, and no-one should punish you for how you feel. However, if grey-aro is going to make you uncomfortable, it is entirely okay to not identify as anything in particular. You could just go on with life, and if you fall in love with someone, that's awesome, but if you don't, that's awesome too.

Arospec people can definitely ship though, and I know several arospecs who love the kind of fics you mentioned.

Again, no-one should make you feel like your identity isn't valid, whether you identify as grey-aro or not.

I hope you find peace in whatever you decide, and I'm always here if you need to get something off your chest <2

#our arospec experience #if anyone else has some advice?#arospec #arospec experience

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thoriffix · 2 years ago

Text

you're telling me he gets THREE boyfriends???

words: 4.6k

summary: cole's dad assumes the ninja are dating, which - as far as cole is concerned - is ridiculous. of course, it sends him on a bit of a feelings spiral, and maybe he does in fact have a few crushes he has to deal with.

some polyninja goofs! set vaguely in s2 idk when exactly but uhh theyre living on the bounty and lloyd isnt aged up yet thats all thats important. also im trying out posting full fics on here for the first time! this is also on my ao3 ill link it in the rbs

enjoy!

"So, how are the boys?"

"Ugh, Dad." Cole rolls his eyes. Every time he visits, his dad ends up trying to get him to talk about the other ninja, and he doesn't understand it. "They're fine, same as always. Busy training, probably."

"Shame they never come to visit," Lou comments, sipping his tea. "I really would love to get to know them better."

Cole squints dubiously at his father, who seems to be trying to appear nonchalant. "...Why?"

"Well, why wouldn't I? If my son suddenly came home with one boyfriend I'd like to get to know him, let alone three!"

What.

Cole stares at Lou. He puts his tea cup down and furrows his brow as he tries to process. Dad thinks- okay. Dad thinks the ninja are his… boyfriends? The ninja. All of them. Boyfriends?

"We're not dating, dad," he says, after a solid few seconds of confused silence. Lou tilts his head.

"You're not?" he asks. "None of you?"

"No, none of us!"

Why would he even think that? Do they act like boyfriends? Dad didn't even know he was gay until a few weeks ago. Why would he just assume Cole’s friends were dating him? Or each other, for that matter?

"Well," says Lou, frowning. "I must have misread. Sorry, son."

"That's okay, dad," says Cole. His head is spinning, though. Misread what? Normal, friendly, platonic interactions between four close buddies? How could you possibly misread that? "What, uh- why would you… what made you think that?"

Lou hums, taking another sip of his tea as he thinks about it. Cole finds himself leaning forward in anticipation, and immediately feels weird about it. Why is he excited to know? That's weird. Stop it, Cole.

"You were the happiest I've ever seen you," Lou finally says, and Cole feels his stomach flip. "When you were fighting, yes, but even more so when you were just with them. The way you looked at them, I… well, it reminded me of myself when I first fell in love."

Cole really, truly, has no idea how to feel about that. He stares down into his lap. This isn't exactly a conversation he'd love to be having with the father he's fairly estranged from, anyway. Maybe once they were closer he'd be willing to talk about his nonexistent love life, but apparently it's happening now, because apparently he looks at the other ninja like he's in love with them, which is- well, it's a lot to unpack.

"Why so interested?" Lou asks teasingly, after Cole hasn't said anything for a few minutes. Cole’s stomach flips again.

"I'm not!" he defends, though he can't really deny that he is. When he thinks about it his heart keeps doing these little flutters. Maybe he just has a heart condition. That's probably more likely. A rare heart condition that only shows symptoms when he thinks about the idea of dating his fellow ninja. The idea of boyfriends. Having boyfriends. Dating them. Maybe even kissing them! He-

Wow, that heart condition sure is a doozy.

"Well, I'm not going to sit around and tell you how it looks," says Lou. "I think you might need to work out how you actually feel."

"Unhelpful, dad," Cole grumbles. His father laughs, and picks his tea back up.

"If you say you're not dating, I believe you. But maybe I wasn't misreading your expressions?" He raises his eyebrows and sips his tea meaningfully. Cole can feel his face going hot.

"Yeah, yeah," he mutters. "I'm changing the subject now. How's the weather been lately?"

–

Later, on the Bounty, Cole can’t stop thinking about it. What the fuck did his dad mean about him and the other ninja? He spends most of the day after he gets home stewing about it, brooding in various spots aboard the ship and generally overthinking. It doesn't make him feel any better in the slightest.

Eventually the others notice, because of course they do, because they share a space of a couple hundred square feet at best. Kai corners him on the deck first.

“Hey, man,” he says, slapping Cole on the back and joining him in peering over the edge of the boat. “You doin’ okay?”

Kai’s picked up a habit of checking in on the others the moment they seem even a little off, and he seems scarily attuned to when they’re not feeling great. It makes Cole smile. He’s a good guy. Much more sensitive and caring than his cocky outward self would have you believe, and Cole’s lucky to get to see it. Lucky to get to see his face, too, cause he’s sure easy on the eyes. And-

Cole’s cheeks go hot. Oh, boy.

“All good!” he replies, maybe a little too squeakily. Kai narrows his eyes suspiciously. His stunning, deep brown eyes. Cole scolds himself mentally. Where is this coming from?

“You went to visit your dad today, right?” asks Kai, and Cole nods. “That go okay?”

“Been worse. We, uh, talked a lot."

“Hey, that’s a start.” Kai smiles lopsidedly and reaches out, covering Cole’s hand with his. His palm is warm and comforting. Cole smiles back. “Wanna come play some games with the guys? We got some time.”

“We should probably be training,” Cole says, raising one eyebrow, but it’s more of a tease than an actual protest. He’d much rather play. If nothing else, it's fun to watch Jay rage when he's losing.

“Eh, what Wu doesn’t know won’t hurt him. C’mon.”

Cole allows himself to be led the relatively short distance from the deck into their room, where Jay and Zane are already battling it out.

“Ah, hello, Cole,” says Zane, pausing the game and turning to smile up at Cole with that sweet, awkward smile he always has. “Are you alright?”

“I’m peachy, snowflake,” Cole replies, grinning as he sits down between them. Zane tilts his head in apparent confusion. “I’m good. No worries.”

“Good,” says Zane. Kai sits down on Zane’s other side and picks up a spare controller, passing Cole the fourth. Jay nudges him.

“Ready to get your ass kicked?” he asks, smirking, and Cole just smirks back.

“I’d be careful who you threaten, motormouth.”

“Ooh, fighting talk!” exclaims Kai. “C’mon, I wanna get into it already!”

Zane sets up a fresh game. Cole sits there, idly playing with the buttons as he waits, and smiles. He’s got the best friends.

–

It doesn’t entirely clear his mind, but digitally brawling with the other ninja certainly makes him feel a bit better, right up until Wu finds them and scolds them for shirking their duties. He finds himself in the kitchen with Zane, washing dishes as Zane starts to get dinner ready.

“Do not laugh, please,” Zane says shyly. Cole blinks at him, and then suddenly realises that Zane is bashfully tying his pink apron around his waist. He feels guilty immediately.

“I won’t,” he promises. “Sorry for laughing at you for it before.”

“That’s okay. I understand it is a little silly. It’s pink, after all.”

“No, it- it still sucked for us to laugh. You don’t look silly. You, uh- pink suits you.”

It’s nowhere near a lie. Zane looks great in pink. He looks great in anything, honestly. Most of all, he looks great wearing the pleased smile that crosses his face at that. It’s infectious - Cole finds himself smiling too, distracted and scrubbing the same spot on a bowl over and over. He snaps his attention back to the dishes. FSM, what is with him? His dad’s comments must have got in his head. He doesn’t remember ever noticing the others’ appearances this much before, nor feeling this fluttery when he thinks about them. But then again, didn’t he? Weren’t they always this handsome, now that he thinks about it? Maybe the butterflies are new, but they don’t feel out of place, exactly. When he casts his mind back, maybe he does remember feeling a little fluttery whenever Kai puts his hand on his, or Jay poorly trash-talks him, or Zane makes extra dumplings because he knows they’re Cole’s favourite. He stares into the soapy water, suddenly unsure of himself.

“Cole? Are you alright?” Zane asks, placing a cold hand on Cole’s arm and pulling him out of his thoughts. Cole nods.

“Yep,” he says, and it’s not a lie. He’s just… confused, is all. There’s no way his dad was right, right? Not about them dating, of course, but about his, uh… feelings. Wouldn’t that be embarrassing? His dad, who he barely sees, picking up on Cole having a- well, multiple crushes before it even crossed Cole’s mind. “Sorry, Zane. Just thinkin’.”

“No need to apologise,” says Zane. “And, um. Thank you for saying pink suits me. I rather like it.”

He smiles, and then makes a beeline for the stove to start cooking. Cole watches him move perfectly around the kitchen, each movement graceful and well-oiled. The water's long gone cold by the time he actually resumes doing the dishes.

–

Dinner is perfect, as it always is when it's Zane's night to cook. Cole devours his own helping and then a fair bit of Jay's, when he isn't looking. Lloyd watches him sneak food off Jay's plate from across the table, wide-eyed, and then utterly fails to do the same to Nya, who notices immediately.

After the meal, Jay and Cole end up on the deck together, trying to make the most of the time before bed. The sun's gone down, leaving them chugging along through dusky indigo skies, a few stars twinkling above them.

"Don't think I didn't notice you stealing my food all of dinner, mister," Jay says, and Cole grins, embarrassed. Busted.

"Well, why didn't you stop me then?"

Jay shrugs. "I figured it would mean that you owe me! Besides, I know you love Zane’s cooking."

Cole knows for a fact that Jay also loves Zane's cooking. They all do. He doesn't comment on that, though, just raises an eyebrow instead. "Oh yeah?"

"Yep!"

He doesn't elaborate. Cole chooses to assume he'll be doing Jay's chores tomorrow. He rolls his eyes, and leans over the side of the boat. The moon is so bright tonight, illuminating everything in a pale glow. He chances a glance at Jay out of the corner of his eye, and sure enough; beautiful. Damnit. Why couldn't he have less handsome friends? And kind, too, and funny. And caring. And-

Jay catches him looking and scrunches up his nose, sticking his tongue out. Cole feels his heart skip a beat.

God damnit.

He has three whole stupid crushes, doesn't he?

And that means his stupid dad was right, too.

Cole stares down at the distant desert below them, slowly passing by. This is stupid. Feelings are stupid. They're his friends - his only friends, not that he really likes to admit it. Well- he still has Wu and Nya and Lloyd, but still. They're his team, for another thing. How's he going to fight effectively alongside them when all of a sudden he gets butterflies looking in their eyes for too long?

Jay pokes him. "Whatcha thinkin' about?"

"Just- stuff," says Cole vaguely.

"Ooh, mystery man, huh? Bet I can guess what you're thinking about."

"Jay, I-"

"Cake? Video games? The fact that it's your turn to mop the deck this week? Dragons?"

Cole should've known that vagueness would get him nowhere with Jay. Annoying, adorable little shit. Instead he just sighs and nods. "Yeah, uh, all of the above."

"Ha! You're so predictable, Cole."

I guess I am, Cole thinks, leaning on his hand and watching Jay's smug face turn to look back out at the clouds. He's only thinking a little bit about kissing him, which he's going to count as a win. He continues to think about it until they go to bed for the night, but it’s only a little bit, so. He’s doing well.

–

The next evening, Cole finally finds himself alone on the deck of the Bounty, having spent all day in the company of at least one of the other ninja, all of whom are suddenly the most attractive guys in Ninjago and he might be going a little bit crazy. Getting some time alone is rare under normal circumstances, but while dealing with this newest revelation it's nothing short of a godsend.

He begins pacing up and down the deck, debating just what he's supposed to do now. Right. So maybe, just maybe, he has three new crushes. Or, more like, he has three old crushes that he's only just noticed and is kind of kicking himself about in retrospect.

He has a few options, Cole supposes.

One, he tells them all how he feels. The idea of this one makes his stomach tie itself into twelve different knots and then throw itself off the side of the ship, so he's not really sure it's ideal. But then again, if it went well… he doesn't dare think about it. The odds of it going the way he'd like it to are so tiny that he doesn't even bother properly entertaining the idea. This option isn't really an option.

Two, he picks one of them to confess to and buries the other two crushes down deep and doesn't think about them ever. This one is more plausible, even if the idea of choosing between them seems impossible. Any time he thinks he's settled on one of them, one of the others will float into his mind and his heart will do the flutter again and he'll be back at square one. Besides, he doesn't even know if any of them would like him back. This option isn't ideal, but it's there.

Three, he buries all of them down deep and pretends they don't exist. This one, as far as Cole can see, has no downsides. Nothing has to change, no one has to get rejected or ruin any friendships or teamwork, and he can go on having fun with his best friends and never think about kissing them at all. Ever. It's the perfect plan.

Of course, perfect plans often have a little snag or two, which Cole discovers as soon as he marches proudly back into their living quarters and is met with three stupidly handsome and loveable faces.

For the next few days, Cole engages in what can only be described as the most miserable game of tag he’s ever played, in which he’s constantly running from his own gay thoughts attempting to catch him. Every time he sees the other ninja, his heart utterly betrays him by trying to thump itself out of his chest, and his brain betrays him even more by refusing to stop imagining them kissing him, or holding his hand, or even cuddling. Luckily, it doesn’t interfere with their ninja work too much, because Cole is a professional, and their well-oiled team is second nature at this point. At home, though? Well, those two days of performing arts school he attended are really putting the work in.

It doesn’t help that recently the ninja have become more affectionate than ever, constantly checking in on him and asking if he wants to hang out, and there’s only so many times he can turn them down without coming off rude or suspicious. He’s been hanging out with little Lloyd a lot instead. To be fair to the kid, he’s a lot of fun to hang out with, actually. Plus, as a bonus, the ninja don’t seem to be quite as affectionate when Lloyd, Nya or Wu are around, which Cole is putting down to them not wanting to exclude anyone from their little best friend group.

He’s hanging out by himself in the sleeping quarters, reading a book that Zane’s been trying to get him to read and eating a sandwich, when Nya pops her head round the door and says; “Hey!”

He glances over, brushes some crumbs off his chest, and sits up, putting the book down. “Hey.”

“What’re you doing in here? Everyone's up on the deck, training.”

She steps into the room and walks over to his bunk, sitting down next to him. Cole shrugs.

“I was tired?” he tries, and she laughs.

“Nice try. Wu will never let you get away with that one. Ninja never quit!” she says, doing a scarily accurate impression of Master Wu. Cole snorts, and then looks at his hands. It’s not that he doesn’t want to train. It’s more that Kai had bumped into him earlier and for some ungodly reason had reached out to brush a lock of Cole’s hair behind his ear, and Cole’s now worried that if he looks Kai in the eyes he might actually explode.

He’s not gonna say that. He just sort of shrugs instead.

Nya pokes his cheek. “What’s going on with you?” she asks, raising one eyebrow. Cole looks at her.

“What do you mean?”

She shrugs. “You’re acting weird lately. Around the guys mostly. You feeling okay?”

Damn. Cole cringes slightly. He’s probably being very obvious, huh? He opens his mouth, fully intending to make up some excuse, even if he has no idea what would sound plausible, but what actually comes out is; “I think I’m in love with all three of the other guys because my dad thought we were all dating and it made me realise I really like them all and I have no idea what to do about it and I was trying to ignore it but that’s really hard and I don’t wanna ruin the team or our friendships or anything and it sucks.”

Nya stares at him.

“And also I’m gay,” he adds, belatedly realising he's never actually officially come out. He’s pretty sure they all know, but still. Worth adding.

She takes a second, looking almost confused, and then laughs. “Okay,” she says. “Lots of information there, Cole.”

“Sorry,” he mumbles, smiling a bit himself. Her smile is infectious. She sighs, and then pats him on the shoulder.

“First of all, congrats on the coming out. I mean, I did already know, so. Y’know. Still congrats!”

“Thank you…?”

"Secondly, that's really cute. You should tell them!"

Cole stares at her. "Nya. You gotta be kidding me."

"I'm not! What's the worst that could happen?" She’s grinning at him, with a sparkle in her eye like she knows something he doesn’t, but he just frowns.

"Uh, I don't know. Everything? Breaking up the team for no good reason? Losing my only friends?"

"Pssh, that's nothing." She sounds cheery, but Cole's not smiling, so she sighs and pats his shoulder. "Right. Sorry. Unhelpful. But look, I really do think you should tell them. They're worried about you, y'know."

Cole blinks. "They are?"

"Yeah, of course. If nothing else, telling them will get you closure, right? Your friendship is stronger than you think, and they care about you, so even if they don't like like you back, is that really the end of the world?"

Huh. Cole looks down at his hands. "I guess not," he admits, frowning. It doesn't feel like it should be that easy. Admittedly, the idea of rejection does make him want to crawl into a cupboard forever, but Nya has a point. She grins again, toothily.

"I'm always right," she says, smug. Cole rolls his eyes and leans into her. She wraps an arm around him. "Oh, and I'm rooting for you, champ. I guarantee it’ll go better than you think."

“Why are you so sure?” Cole grumbles, and she opens her mouth, and then closes it again, shrugging.

“Just am!” she says, slightly sing-song, and he groans. Why is everybody he knows so smug?

–

"Hey," says Cole, and only Zane looks up. Kai and Jay are too busy intently focusing on the game they're playing, which, honestly? That's fine. Cole’s feeling pretty nervous, so the less eyes on him right now the better. "I need to talk to you guys."

"What's up, dude?" asks Kai, narrowing his eyes at the TV, and then groaning. "Oh, damnit, Jay!"

"Ha! Get good, loser!"

"Are you guys done?" Cole asks, feeling endeared and irritated at the same time. God, why'd it have to be these idiots? They pause the game, finally, and turn around to face him, nodding. "Okay."

"Are you alright, Cole?" asks Zane, looking worried.

“Yeah, I just- I have to tell you all something.”

“We’re all ears, bro,” says Kai, grinning up at him, and Cole’s heart flutters embarrassingly. Oh god. This is gonna suck. He takes a deep breath.

"I like you guys," says Cole. "Like, like like you. All of you."

There's silence. Cole resists the urge to squeeze his eyes shut so he can't see them all looking at him. This is terrible. His heart is pounding.

"...I thought we were all already dating?" Zane says, sounding genuinely bewildered.

“Yeah, I kinda- are we not?” asks Jay, putting down his game controller. Kai nods in agreement, frowning at Cole.

What.

Cole stares at them all. He’s desperately trying to see in their eyes if this is some weird prank, or joke, but they all look utterly baffled at the idea that they’re not all dating him. They all think they’re dating him? And each other? All of them?

This might be the weirdest turn of events in Cole’s life, and he once had an old man on top of a mountain ask him to become a ninja to help save Ninjago from evil.

“Wh- we are?” he says desperately, holding out his hands in confusion. The others make eye contact with each other and then look back at him, nodding. Cole’s head is spinning. “For how long?”

Jay shrugs. “I dunno, a couple of weeks?”

A couple of weeks? He’s saying that Cole could have been kissing all three of them for weeks? He must look shaken, because Kai holds out a hand comfortingly.

“How did I not know?” he asks. They look at each other again.

“I do not know,” says Zane.

“We just sort of assumed you wanted to take things slow?” explains Kai. “And we didn’t wanna push you or anything, y’know?”

Cole really does not know what to do now. He goes and sits on the floor between them all, and then suddenly has a realisation. “My dad was right,” he groans, dropping his head into his hands in shame. This is awful. Not only was his stupid dad right about his stupid feelings, he was right about them dating, apparently. And apparently, everybody was aware of this except for Cole!

Wait. “Wait,” he says. “Does Nya think we’re dating too?”

“Uh, yeah, I’m gonna tell my sister, dude,” says Kai, and Cole groans again. Great. No wonder she’d seemed so sure of herself when he asked for her advice. He feels a hand pat his arm slightly awkwardly.

“Are you alright?” asks Zane, sounding concerned, and Cole nods into his hands. It’s not quite settled in yet, given that this was the exact opposite of the outcome he was expecting and all. It might be starting to, though, given the way his stomach is starting to fizz with excitement.

“So,” he says, lifting his head out of his hands. They’re all looking at him with eyes that are far too soft and gentle and beautiful. “You’re telling me you all want to date me?”

“Well, I thought we all were for several weeks, so I’d say yes,” says Jay, and Cole partially considers dropping his head back into his hands. He puts them down on his lap instead.

“What now?” he asks. He’s pretty sure he’s just mightily embarrassed himself, so he’s half expecting one of them to go well, actually, we don’t really like you that much anymore, Cole, sorry! Instead, Kai starts grinning and adjusts himself so he’s on one knee.

“Well,” he says, making eye contact with each of them. “Would all three of you do me the honour of being my boyfriends? Officially, this time.”

Cole might be dying. His heart rate would certainly suggest that he is. Beside him, Zane giggles, and Jay groans and rolls his eyes.

“You’re so annoying,” he complains, and then leans forward and kisses Kai’s cheek.

“I would be honoured,” Zane says, seriously, and leans in to kiss Kai’s other cheek. Kai raises his eyebrows at Cole, the cocky grin melting into something softer as he looks at him.

“If you’d rather talk about it first-” he begins to say, before Cole gets his courage up and all but jumps forward to plant a kiss directly on Kai’s lips. They’re soft, and warm, and he can feel Kai smiling against his lips. His heart hammers furiously against the inside of his ribs as he pulls back and grins awkwardly.

“Yeah,” he says, slightly embarrassed by the way Kai is smiling at him. Jay makes a noise.

“My turn!” he says, and pulls Cole into a kiss as well, their noses squishing uncomfortably against each other and teeth clacking slightly. He pulls away, slightly dazed, and Jay all but sparkles at him with the joy in his grin. Zane clears his throat politely.

“May I?” he asks, and Cole nods, his head spinning too much to answer properly. Zane leans in and kisses him, much gentler than Jay, and then pulls back after a moment and smiles. Cole’s tempted to pinch himself, just to make sure this isn’t some big self-indulgent dream. His heart is calming down, convinced that all is well.

“Glad we got that sorted!” chirps Jay, picking his game controller back up. “Cole, do you wanna join the game next round?”

Cole has to laugh. He feels a bit ridiculous. Knowing that he could’ve been happily with them all for weeks rather than tearing himself up inside trying to escape his crushes stings a bit, but at least he got this outcome instead of something worse. Honestly, this is the best possible outcome he could have hoped for.

“Yeah, okay,” he says, and grabs the spare controller.

–

Cole’s dad opens the door not ten seconds after he rings the bell, which suggests he’d been waiting by the door for Cole to show up, which is either quite sweet or a bit weird, he can’t decide.

“Cole!” he says, opening it, and then his eyes widen. “Oh!”

Cole grins, gesturing to the other three ninja, who have promised to be on their best behaviour and are dressed in their nicest outfits. “Surprise?” he says, and they beam at his dad. Lou looks utterly thrilled, clapping his hands together and grinning.

“Oh, this is wonderful! Cole never brings friends home,” he says, and Cole’s face goes a bit hot. He looks around at the other ninja, who smile at him encouragingly.

“It’s actually, uh. Boyfriends, dad.”

Lou’s face shifts through surprise, to joy, to smug understanding. He smiles at Cole, who rolls his eyes.

“Boyfriends, eh?” he says, raising his eyebrows. “Who knew?”

“Lay off it, dad,” says Cole. “Can we come in or not?”

Lou steps back to let them all pass through, waving them in with pleasantries and greetings, and when Cole passes him he pats him on the shoulder and smiles, his eyes gentle and proud. Cole smiles back, embarrassed. He’s still a little bit mad that his dad figured things out before he did, but honestly? He can’t be that upset, what with the way it all worked out.

Okay, maybe a little. But only because his dad is being so smug about it. Otherwise, he’s completely fine. After all, he’s dating the three best people in Ninjago, so what’s he got to be mad about?

Cole grins as he walks into the living room to find Kai and Jay mid-bicker already, with Zane attempting to act as mediator. They stop when they see him, all three sets of eyes lighting up, and his grin grows wider. Yeah. He’s doing pretty good.

#grays fic stuff #ninjago #lego ninjago #ninjago fic #i dont rly know how to post fic on tumblr aha #hope this is good #polyninja #cole brookstone #lou brookstone #kai smith #kai jiang #jay walker #zane julien #nya smith #nya jiang #fics

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iiruwu · 2 years ago

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hi can i. can you please map out your bulletin board list on how you think ronance will become endgame. because i also have a bulletin board map in my head and i want to compare notes :)

this is so cute i'd love to! @wrought-tweaks also requested this so :D

im going to first go through all the info i've collected as well as inferred (even though my inferences aren't fact, by any means).

so first, lets consider the undeniable truths. in terms of canonical possibility, i genuinely think ronance's chances are pretty high. not only has robin's sexuality been confirmed - something that rarely ever happens in most shows - but there's also the interviews over the last few weeks that lead me to believe that vickie is probably not going to survive the next volume:

call me pessimistic but i really don't think this is going to end up well. if i were to predict vickie's outcome, i'd say we're going to get confirmation that she is also queer (perhaps through vecna) and then she'll die.

there's also this interview about robin's love life in season 4, whichhhh call me crazy but is kinda???

its obviously not confirming anything but 'a story that gets built' reeks of ronance to me, because i really do NOT see any story happening between her and vickie. vickie's barely even been in the entire season, and robin's screentime has largely revolved around her interactions with nancy. its a little fishy.

so if we're assuming that vickie is dying, and there's going to be a shift of some sort in robin's story, then we also need to consider nancy's whole love triangle going on, which - this is a major source of concern for me tbh. but! let me sprinkle some more interview crumbs that are telling of the possible outcome of that whole mess:

i think it's like 50-60% safe to say stancy won't happen in the end if i were to go off of this, but i'm not the type to put all my eggs in one basket, so - i'm not entirely optimistic about it. what sucks, though, is that i've pretty much scoured the internet over the past month (the autism hit HARD after s4 dropped) and there has been absolutely nothing about jancy's future aside from charlie talking about how jonathon was probably having thoughts about breaking up with nancy. jancy might actually stay strong. still, im trying to look on the bright side :')

there's also this tid-bit from natalia which i might be reading too much into (or i might be overestimating the duffer brothers' attentiveness to her character) but:

like come on. this shit reeks of the whole murray scene where he's like "you like steve. but you don't love steve." tell me not?? i feel like it'd be a little redundant to have her going for steve or jonathon when they've both done very questionable things over the last few seasons. realistically though, her answer leans more towards stancy not happening rather then jancy not happening. jancy has been holding up pretty strong overall, which - good for jancy nation tbh but i don’t exactly think jonathon is the best partner to her either considering the incident with him taking photos. call me crazy but if i were screenwriting nancy’s love story i would be taking this into consideration. who knows, though.

now, all the interviews and articles aside, i'm just gonna be real with you and say i really find it hard to believe nancy would go back to steve. she has been wronged by him and she has wronged him, too. not only that but i think she might connect him to her guilt over barb's death, which i posted abt before. if i were to predict the outcome of that whole weird tension between them during volume 1, i'm betting my money that it's not going to go anywhere.

jancy, on the other hand? iiiii don't know. i think jancy is really one of the only things holding ronance back from actually sprouting and becoming something canon. what i WILL say though is that if nancy were to see jonathon now, and who he has become as a character, i rlly doubt she’s going to look at him and be like “yeah i want to continue dating him” lol

that aside, if we're talking my predictions for ronance if they were to actually, really happen, i don't think it's going to happen this season. in a perfect world where things went like how they do in my insane little head, i think there'd be a few embers of something more in the second volume, but nothing would be acted upon just because it'd be too poorly timed for both of their characters. robin is best friends with steve, who's clearly not over nancy/has some sort of residual connection to her that he might be confusing as romantic, so her feelings might be stifled by that. nancy is still with jonathon, and even though the two of them are struggling relationship-wise, its all just too vague to make out what will happen with them. still, if some mutual interest were to be hinted at in vol2, it'd probably be a while until they come together. it might even be right up to the end of the show until we see anything come to fruition in my opinion.

i'd probably be able to tell you my sure-fire prediction for their potential future after volume 2, just because we'll definitely get a solid answer for nancy's whole love triangle fiasco by the end. either way, robin's whole love progression that has been alluded to is verryyyy suspicious and nancy's love life is just entirely too shaky for jancy or stancy to hold up.

pls feel free to dm me/submit your own bulletin board to my inbox if you'd like! i love hearing other people's opinions/predictions/theories for robin and nancy, both individually and as a pairing. ty for giving me an excuse to basically info dump sjkskjgjk <33333333

#stranger things #st #robin x nancy #robin/nancy #ronance #nancy wheeler #robin buckley #steve harrington

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